1 00:00:10,593 --> 00:00:12,971 [Patty] This was the third time I'd killed. 2 00:00:13,054 --> 00:00:16,016 Maybe the fourth, depending on Stella Rose, 3 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,727 but I'd never done it in front of anyone before. 4 00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,939 My mom had seen a part of me nobody else had, not even Bob. 5 00:00:23,648 --> 00:00:26,151 Had I finally found a safe place to be honest? 6 00:00:26,651 --> 00:00:29,046 - Could I recover after all? - What the hell are we gonna do? 7 00:00:29,070 --> 00:00:32,407 I've got two kilos of cocaine in my tits. I'll get arrested. We can't call the cops. 8 00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:34,159 - Let's call Bob. He's my lawyer. - No. 9 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:36,595 That's the last person that should help us cover up a murder. 10 00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:38,038 [Patty] Great. Now she tells me. 11 00:00:38,121 --> 00:00:39,664 You're saying we should cover this up? 12 00:00:39,748 --> 00:00:41,124 I don't think we have a choice. 13 00:00:41,624 --> 00:00:42,744 If word gets out about this, 14 00:00:42,792 --> 00:00:45,312 we're gonna have some pissed off drug lords looking for payback. 15 00:00:45,628 --> 00:00:46,988 - [knocking at door] - [gasps] Shh! 16 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,339 Is that them? 17 00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:49,716 Get the gun. Get the gun. 18 00:00:50,383 --> 00:00:52,927 [Henry] Patty, open up! I have something for you! 19 00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:54,971 - It's Henry! Will you... - Hello? 20 00:00:55,096 --> 00:00:56,616 - Just pretend we're not here. - Patty? 21 00:00:57,307 --> 00:00:58,307 I can see you in there. 22 00:00:58,349 --> 00:01:00,226 Shit. I've gotta answer it. 23 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:02,771 - Oh, sweetie, you just have a little... - Mom... 24 00:01:02,854 --> 00:01:03,688 - Mom. - I won't... 25 00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:04,772 - Thanks. - Okay. 26 00:01:07,108 --> 00:01:08,610 Hey. What are you doing here? 27 00:01:08,693 --> 00:01:09,778 Third runner-up. 28 00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:10,945 Better than fourth, right? 29 00:01:11,029 --> 00:01:12,030 [chuckles weakly] 30 00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:15,325 I heard that there was a parade tomorrow, so you'll get to be on the float. 31 00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:19,079 - That's cool, right? - Yeah, totally. Thank you for the stuff. 32 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,322 - I'll call you later. - Wait! 33 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:24,626 I'm going back to Minnesota tomorrow. 34 00:01:24,709 --> 00:01:25,709 What? 35 00:01:26,336 --> 00:01:28,254 - You're leaving? - Well, yeah. 36 00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:30,882 Dixie's gonna come stay with us for a little bit 37 00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:32,425 so we can get to know each other. 38 00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:36,471 It's my last night here, so I thought we could spend it together. 39 00:01:38,556 --> 00:01:39,557 Tonight? 40 00:01:41,142 --> 00:01:42,769 [mouthing] 41 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,563 I can't. It's just... 42 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:46,939 My mom... 43 00:01:47,565 --> 00:01:48,399 She got drunk 44 00:01:48,483 --> 00:01:51,111 and puked all over the place. 45 00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:53,363 I mean, there's vomit everywhere. Chunks on the walls. 46 00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:54,823 [Henry] I don't care. 47 00:01:54,906 --> 00:01:56,658 I want to talk about our future. 48 00:01:56,741 --> 00:01:58,785 I was hoping we could try long distance. 49 00:01:58,868 --> 00:02:02,205 [Patty] I wouldn't have a future at all if I didn't get rid of him fast, 50 00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:05,291 even though it was the last thing I wanted to do. 51 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:08,085 What's the point? 52 00:02:09,879 --> 00:02:11,756 You're leaving. It's over. 53 00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:17,262 Wait, Patty! Don't do this. 54 00:02:17,345 --> 00:02:18,346 I love you. 55 00:02:21,057 --> 00:02:22,475 Oh, baby, what happened? 56 00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:26,521 I think I just pushed away the best thing that's ever happened to me. 57 00:02:26,604 --> 00:02:27,897 Oh, I'm so sorry. 58 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:31,568 I wish the biggest decision you had to make today 59 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:34,487 was whether or notto continue a long-distance relationship, 60 00:02:35,196 --> 00:02:36,516 instead of getting rid of bodies. 61 00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:40,451 All those years I wasn't here for you. 62 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:41,536 You did this... 63 00:02:42,453 --> 00:02:43,453 because of me. 64 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,457 It's all my fault. 65 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:49,460 [Patty] Was this my chance? 66 00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:51,171 Could I tell her the truth? 67 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:52,255 It's not. 68 00:02:53,381 --> 00:02:54,674 It's because of me. 69 00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:58,553 I'm a killer. 70 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,684 Oh, my God. My sweet baby. 71 00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:06,227 You're so not. 72 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:09,022 You saved my life. 73 00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:12,567 You never ever, ever, ever would hurt anybody 74 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,903 if you didn't absolutely have to. 75 00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:16,070 - But... - Baby, 76 00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:19,073 you... are a beauty queen. You're not a murderer. 77 00:03:20,408 --> 00:03:22,076 So much for being honest. 78 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:25,079 Hey, what's up with the bouquet and the sash? Did you win? 79 00:03:27,999 --> 00:03:28,999 Third runner-up. 80 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:31,506 The last thing I want to do is be on some float. 81 00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:32,629 No. 82 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:34,339 Oh, that's perfect. You gotta go. 83 00:03:34,923 --> 00:03:36,424 More eyes on you, the better. 84 00:03:37,258 --> 00:03:39,302 It's just... What are we gonna do with these bodies? 85 00:03:41,095 --> 00:03:43,806 Don't look at me. I've never covered up a murder before. 86 00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:45,516 Okay. No, I know. 87 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,600 Um... 88 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:50,980 Oh! We can take 'em, we can dump 'em in Gator Bog. 89 00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:53,650 Nobody goes down to that old swamp anymore. 90 00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,860 Okay. And we can't forget Bob's gun. 91 00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:57,695 - Yeah. - Yeah. 92 00:03:57,779 --> 00:03:58,947 - Okay. - Okay. 93 00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:01,574 - All right. So we've got a plan. - Got a plan. 94 00:04:02,158 --> 00:04:03,159 It's gonna be fun. 95 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:04,643 ["Photograph" by Def Leppard plays] 96 00:04:04,702 --> 00:04:06,829 [crocodile growls] 97 00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,877 ♪ I'm out of luck, out of love ♪ 98 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:16,839 ♪ Got a photograph picture of ♪ 99 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,883 ♪ Passion killer... ♪ 100 00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:21,386 [Bob] I had finally realized I was bad for Patty. 101 00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:25,390 - All right. Smile for the voters. - So I decided to focus on myself. 102 00:04:25,473 --> 00:04:28,101 I moved back into my house, I was running for mayor, 103 00:04:28,184 --> 00:04:30,436 and I wasn't going to let anything distract me. 104 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,522 - Not Patty, not pageants. - [record scratching] 105 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:33,898 What in the hell are you doing? 106 00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:36,234 It's a photo shoot. Now move. 107 00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:37,652 Oh, poor Bob. 108 00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:40,863 You still trying to get a Grindr pic that someone will respond to? 109 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:44,909 No, this is for my mayoral campaign poster. 110 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:45,910 My dad arranged it. 111 00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:47,829 [Coralee] Mmm. Why don't you just let it go? 112 00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:49,998 You're only running as an F-U to me and Barnard. 113 00:04:50,081 --> 00:04:52,250 No, I'm not. Not anymore. 114 00:04:52,333 --> 00:04:53,334 But still... 115 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:55,461 F-U too. 116 00:04:56,337 --> 00:04:58,756 Let's move to the kitchen. There's more natural light. 117 00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:02,635 Oh, you know where else there's natural light? Outside. 118 00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:04,220 So maybe you should just leave. 119 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,471 You leave. 120 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:07,390 You know, I can come back at another time. 121 00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:10,727 Oh, no, no, no. Now's a perfect time. 122 00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:12,937 Let's move to the breakfast nook. 123 00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:16,983 - Seriously? - What? 124 00:05:17,066 --> 00:05:19,110 I like to enjoy my coffee over here. 125 00:05:19,193 --> 00:05:22,280 Oh, when is the last time you ever enjoyed anything... 126 00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:23,614 You know what? This is stupid. 127 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:26,617 I am not going to get drawn in to your little drama. 128 00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:28,745 Let's go back to the living room. 129 00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:32,290 No, no, no. Excuse me. 130 00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:34,249 No. 131 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:37,587 [Coralee] Go! 132 00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:39,630 Are you really gonna be this immature? 133 00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:41,549 Me? You are the one who is being immature. 134 00:05:41,632 --> 00:05:43,217 - No, you are. - No, you. 135 00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:45,011 - You. You. - You. You. 136 00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:48,598 - [repeating] You. - [repeating] You! 137 00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:50,284 Seems like you have stuff to work out... 138 00:05:50,308 --> 00:05:51,142 You know what? 139 00:05:51,225 --> 00:05:52,560 - Let's work it out. - Let's. 140 00:05:52,643 --> 00:05:54,729 - Right now. - I'm ready. Let's do it! 141 00:05:59,984 --> 00:06:00,984 What's going on? 142 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:04,322 Oh, hi. Half the house is mine, 143 00:06:04,405 --> 00:06:07,450 and half the house is your mother's from now on. 144 00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:09,410 Okay. Well, then I want the good side. 145 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:11,305 You've lost your minds. I'm going to Magnolia's. 146 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:14,165 I'm going to get out of here too. Just call me and reschedule. 147 00:06:14,248 --> 00:06:15,248 - No! - Okay? 148 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,376 Look what you did. 149 00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:22,965 Now I have to call my campaign manager and see if I can get another photographer. 150 00:06:24,008 --> 00:06:25,152 [Patty] The parade's starting soon. 151 00:06:25,176 --> 00:06:26,176 We'll make it. 152 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:27,970 Oh, you look pretty. 153 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,639 [chuckles weakly] Thanks. 154 00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:32,767 Not at all like someone who just killed a bunch of drug dealers 155 00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:34,435 and dumped their bodies in the swamp. 156 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,979 Oh, my God, Patty. What have we done? 157 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,314 [phone whistles] 158 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,232 [Angie] Nope! 159 00:06:41,442 --> 00:06:43,236 I don't want to talk to anyone right now. 160 00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:44,904 I just want a drink. 161 00:06:44,987 --> 00:06:47,031 I know. I could eat a whole cake. 162 00:06:47,698 --> 00:06:48,991 We'll get through this together. 163 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,535 - Okay. - [phone whistles again] 164 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,704 - Oh, shit. [sighs] - No. 165 00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:56,040 Hey, Nonnie. What's up? 166 00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:58,084 What's up? I've been calling you both all night. 167 00:06:58,668 --> 00:06:59,710 Guess what I found out? 168 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:02,713 Somebody paid the guy who tried to attack you at the pageant. 169 00:07:02,797 --> 00:07:03,797 What? 170 00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:04,924 Who? 171 00:07:05,007 --> 00:07:07,635 Ugh, that asshole winner, Heather Kristina Jamie Lee Curtis. 172 00:07:07,718 --> 00:07:09,846 [Patty] Do you think she had anything to do with Roxy? 173 00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:11,097 I don't know. Maybe. 174 00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:12,598 Wha... Did you tell the cops? 175 00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:16,144 I can't. The way I got him to talk wasn't quite legal. 176 00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:18,312 Don't worry. I'll confront her myself. Drive faster. 177 00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:19,396 Okay. 178 00:07:19,981 --> 00:07:21,899 ♪ Yeah, we like to get down ♪ 179 00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:23,734 ♪ Freak it up to this sound ♪ 180 00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:26,446 ♪ Like I'm the best I'm the best in this ♪ 181 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:29,740 [vocalizing] 182 00:07:35,788 --> 00:07:37,790 [marching band music plays] 183 00:07:50,386 --> 00:07:51,386 [Patty] Hey, Heather! 184 00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:55,057 Hey, stop! The third runner-up is here. 185 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,101 No, don't stop! She's late. 186 00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:59,645 Drive faster! Faster! 187 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,439 - [brakes screech] - You bitch! 188 00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:03,232 [Patty] I know what you did! 189 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,942 And I'm gonna take you down! Hard! 190 00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:06,777 What are you doing? Go! 191 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,280 She is not going to steal my thunder. 192 00:08:09,947 --> 00:08:12,241 [crowd gasping] 193 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,244 [man] Miss Georgia American Lady just blew up! 194 00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:18,122 Okay, I know that threat sounded bad. 195 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,999 Oh, my God! 196 00:08:20,082 --> 00:08:21,626 I'm Miss Georgia American... 197 00:08:24,128 --> 00:08:25,630 [woman] It's a terrorist! 198 00:08:26,797 --> 00:08:27,882 Peaches. 199 00:08:27,965 --> 00:08:30,676 No, I don't want to win. I don't want to be Miss Georgia... 200 00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:33,820 [spectator] No, it's the Pageant Killer! 201 00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:35,472 It was her! 202 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,642 She killed my daughter! 203 00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:39,227 Patty Bladell killed them all! 204 00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:40,810 No. 205 00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:42,604 No! 206 00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:44,315 [officer] Back up! Back it up! 207 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:46,776 I'm gonna call Bob. We'll get this figured out. 208 00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,069 [Patty] What were the odds? 209 00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:51,489 I got arrested for a triple homicide I didn't do 210 00:08:51,572 --> 00:08:54,283 after just committing an actual triple homicide. 211 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,495 The police thought I was the Pageant Killer. 212 00:08:58,955 --> 00:08:59,955 And why wouldn't they? 213 00:09:00,498 --> 00:09:03,292 Both times girls died, I ended up with the crown. 214 00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:05,002 Even I wouldn't believe me. 215 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,088 But I knew Bob would. 216 00:09:07,171 --> 00:09:09,757 I'm so sorry about what happened at State, but I promise, 217 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,600 - when you get me out of here... - I'm sorry. 218 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:13,427 I can't represent you. 219 00:09:14,303 --> 00:09:16,222 What? Why? 220 00:09:16,305 --> 00:09:17,932 I'm no good for you, Patty. 221 00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:20,726 I've made some bad choices trying to protect you. 222 00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:23,010 You said it yourself: because of me you can't be honest. 223 00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:24,522 And now look, you're in here. 224 00:09:24,981 --> 00:09:26,732 Wait, you don't think I did this, do you? 225 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,234 No, I know you didn't... 226 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,611 which is why I know you'll be okay. 227 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:36,075 Don't worry. I got you someone else, the best criminal attorney money can buy. 228 00:09:36,158 --> 00:09:38,119 [motor whirring] 229 00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:43,165 [door closes] 230 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:44,249 [Angie] Hey, baby. 231 00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:48,379 This is Shannon. She'll be taking over from here. 232 00:09:48,462 --> 00:09:50,172 She's tried murder cases and I haven't. 233 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,091 Normally, pageant girls give me the creeps, 234 00:09:52,174 --> 00:09:54,594 but, hey, as long as the check clears. 235 00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,178 You do have that check, don't you? 236 00:09:56,262 --> 00:10:00,016 Oh, no, Bob, please. Let me do this for my daughter. 237 00:10:00,474 --> 00:10:04,020 I've got some money sacked away in a... in a couple places. 238 00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:09,525 Yeah, I'm going to need my $10,000 retainer within 24 hours or I'm gone. 239 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:12,111 Is that it? No tip on top or anything? 240 00:10:12,194 --> 00:10:14,780 Here's a tip: next time, don't go so big. 241 00:10:14,989 --> 00:10:17,134 [Bob] What's your plan? Do you have a defense strategy? 242 00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:19,785 Yeah, the plan is, I work alone, so... 243 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,245 anywhere but here, Bob. 244 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,415 Right. [clears throat] 245 00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:27,126 Good luck. Call me if you... 246 00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:28,209 We're good. 247 00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:37,303 [door closes] 248 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:39,639 So, I'm gonna be honest... 249 00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:41,390 This case is a shit show. 250 00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:43,934 They canceled Miss American Lady because of you, 251 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:46,979 - and since all those girls died... - Wait, I'm not going to get the crown? 252 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:50,566 Well, that's an interesting take-away. No, psycho, you're not. 253 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:54,278 Plus, you threatened Heather-six-names before she blew up. 254 00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:59,158 And you were just late enough to keep yourself off that float. 255 00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:01,702 Why were you late? Where were you? 256 00:11:02,244 --> 00:11:04,538 [Patty] I was dumping three bodies in Gator Bog. 257 00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:06,665 She was with me. 258 00:11:09,126 --> 00:11:10,126 Doing what? 259 00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:12,713 Hanging out. 260 00:11:13,547 --> 00:11:14,882 Mother-daughter time. 261 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:16,383 Yeah. 262 00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:20,179 Yeah. The mommy defense isn't gonna cut it, 263 00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:21,722 and without a rock-solid alibi, 264 00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:24,350 we're gonna wait for your arraignment to get you out on bail. 265 00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:26,268 Bail? 266 00:11:27,395 --> 00:11:28,479 I can't go to jail. 267 00:11:28,938 --> 00:11:30,439 Well, you're in luck. 268 00:11:30,898 --> 00:11:32,525 There's a bedbug outbreak at the jail, 269 00:11:32,608 --> 00:11:34,694 and everyone's being temporarily transferred. 270 00:11:35,319 --> 00:11:36,654 You're going to prison. 271 00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:39,573 [dramatic music swells] 272 00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:43,619 [Bob] I had to believe I had done the right thing, for both of us. 273 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:47,391 Patty would get better representation, and I could focus on my mayoral campaign. 274 00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:50,835 Mr. Armstrong, as Miss Bladell's attorney, would you care to comment on her case? 275 00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:53,355 - I'm no longer her attorney. - Because you think she's guilty? 276 00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:56,090 Absolutely not. Miss Bladell is a victim of circumstance. 277 00:11:56,173 --> 00:11:59,009 You're saying it's a coincidence that both times pageant girls died, 278 00:11:59,093 --> 00:12:00,511 Patty Bladell got the crown? 279 00:12:00,594 --> 00:12:02,847 I'm saying that I know in my bones that she's innocent. 280 00:12:02,930 --> 00:12:04,010 Then why not take her case? 281 00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:05,850 Because I'm busy running for mayor. 282 00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:08,686 [Bob] Except being associated with an accused serial murderer 283 00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,449 wasn't exactly going to help me win votes. 284 00:12:10,479 --> 00:12:11,479 [phone chimes] 285 00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:19,029 Unless I could use my newfound notoriety as a way to get out my message. 286 00:12:19,113 --> 00:12:21,240 - You guys want a real story? - Yeah. 287 00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:22,783 Follow me. 288 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,452 - ♪ If they askin' ♪ - ♪ Askin'... ♪ 289 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:28,497 - What the hell? - Right, give me that. 290 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,083 Bob Barnard, 291 00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:33,210 I'm challenging you to a debate... 292 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:34,587 this weekend. 293 00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:39,383 You've got a lot of nerve coming in here. 294 00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:41,802 Your client killed my daughter. 295 00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:44,472 That's the problem with you law and order candidates. 296 00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:47,808 You always want to convict before the trial. 297 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,769 I think I'm winning this debate already. 298 00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:53,605 You know what? 299 00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:55,941 Fine. I'll do it. 300 00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:58,736 And I'm gonna wipe the floor with you. 301 00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:01,322 I'm a master debater. 302 00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:03,574 [reporters chuckling] 303 00:13:03,657 --> 00:13:04,700 Why is that funny? 304 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,661 We're not live, are we? 305 00:13:08,412 --> 00:13:11,290 [Patty] I was in prison for a crime I didn't commit, 306 00:13:11,373 --> 00:13:12,708 and I still couldn't be honest 307 00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:16,045 because my alibi would land me right back in here. 308 00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:19,215 So now I was trapped with a bunch of other criminals, 309 00:13:19,882 --> 00:13:22,551 without food or exercise or Bob. 310 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,678 - How the hell was I going to cope? - [door opens] 311 00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:25,762 [man] Patty Bladell. 312 00:13:26,847 --> 00:13:28,182 My queen. 313 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,851 Scram, ladies. We need this space. 314 00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:33,270 [inmate] What makes her so special? 315 00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:35,314 Who are you? 316 00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:38,818 I'm Warden Winters, and boy, am I happy to meet you. 317 00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:42,655 My lady inmates have won every prison competition that they've entered: 318 00:13:42,738 --> 00:13:46,242 hula dancing, sloppy-joe eating, thumb wrestling. 319 00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:49,453 Only one competition that's ever eluded me: 320 00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:54,250 the National Prison Coalition's Misguided Beauty Competition. 321 00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:56,971 It's the beauty pageant for female convicts. 322 00:13:57,044 --> 00:14:00,297 For 15 straight years, I sent a lady over there to represent us, 323 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:02,550 and for 15 straight years, we don't even place. 324 00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:05,761 But now I have you. 325 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:08,097 You... You want me to compete? 326 00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:10,891 No, you could be gone by then, released out on bail. 327 00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:13,602 So, you're gonna do the next best thing: 328 00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:16,814 choose our winning pageant girl. 329 00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:20,109 Now, here are the girls that I think have the best shot. 330 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,987 Maybe this was my way to get through this... 331 00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:24,864 without food or exercise. 332 00:14:25,447 --> 00:14:27,157 Okay. I'm in. 333 00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:29,910 But you can't pick the right girl out of a book. 334 00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:31,704 We would need to have a competition. 335 00:14:31,787 --> 00:14:32,955 Competition? 336 00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:36,917 We're gonna have our very own prison pageant. 337 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:40,838 [Angie] I had promised Patty that I would be there for her, and right now, 338 00:14:40,921 --> 00:14:43,424 paying her legal bills was the best I could do. 339 00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:46,093 Dr. Duffy, thanks for coming. 340 00:14:46,176 --> 00:14:48,053 I was surprised you still have the same number. 341 00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:50,306 I live in a cabin in the woods. 342 00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:52,224 I'm not a man that likes change. 343 00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,768 - Right. - You know, the last time that I saw you, 344 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:57,104 we got a bullet out of your boyfriend's shoulder. 345 00:14:57,688 --> 00:14:59,648 Gordy, I think. How's he doing? 346 00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:02,860 Dead. Could we just get to the procedure? I don't have a lot of time. 347 00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:06,071 Look, you weren't real specific on the phone. 348 00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:07,740 What are we doing here today? 349 00:15:07,823 --> 00:15:10,784 Lipo? Mole removal? Abortion? 350 00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:12,786 Implants. You ever done those before? 351 00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:15,581 No. But I'll remove anything for a price. 352 00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:16,916 How are you providing payment? 353 00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:18,834 I've got two kilos of cocaine in my tits. 354 00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,169 I'll give you half a kilo. 355 00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:21,086 A whole kilo, 356 00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:24,673 or you can have it removed by a more reputable physician. 357 00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:27,968 After which, you'll be arrested for being a drug mule. 358 00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:31,388 All right. You've got a deal, asshole. 359 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,475 [Bob] Now that I had challenged Barnard to a debate, 360 00:15:34,558 --> 00:15:36,268 all I needed was a platform. 361 00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:38,604 [Coralee] Do you like what I've done with the place? 362 00:15:43,734 --> 00:15:45,611 You know what? This is great. 363 00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:47,488 The less stuff in my space, 364 00:15:47,571 --> 00:15:49,198 the less I'll be distracted. 365 00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:56,121 [playing through speakers] ♪ Oh, I like it a lot ♪ 366 00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:58,082 ♪ Yeah, wanna see what I got? ♪ 367 00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:00,960 - ♪ Oh, I like it a lot ♪ - ♪ I like it ♪ 368 00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:02,044 ♪ I like it a lot ♪ 369 00:16:02,711 --> 00:16:04,171 ♪ Wanna see what I got? ♪ 370 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:05,839 ♪ Wanna see what I got? ♪ 371 00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:07,007 [Coralee grunts] 372 00:16:07,091 --> 00:16:09,218 Coralee, do you have to do that right now? 373 00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:11,720 You can always just move back to the office. 374 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,514 Oh, shit. 375 00:16:13,597 --> 00:16:17,434 [Bob] If I was going to get anything done, duct tape wasn't going to cut it. 376 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:19,687 I was going to need a bigger blockade. 377 00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,814 - [Bob] Right this way, gentlemen. - Bob! 378 00:16:22,731 --> 00:16:23,899 What is going on here? 379 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,568 I am building a wall. 380 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,822 On my side, I'm gonna put my campaign headquarters. 381 00:16:29,905 --> 00:16:32,866 It's a rush job, so they'll be here all night. 382 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,035 How am I supposed to sleep? 383 00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:37,913 Why am I supposed to care? You could just move out. 384 00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,624 Actually, no, I can't. I spoke to my attorney, 385 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:43,669 and she said that if I leave, I lose my rights to the house. 386 00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:46,296 Well, I see that you are in a pickle. 387 00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:50,092 Now, if you'll excuse me, I do have some paint samples to look at. 388 00:16:50,592 --> 00:16:52,678 [power tools whirring] 389 00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:59,768 Oh, now, that's what I'm talking about. Let's shoot a magic video. 390 00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:01,103 [sighs] 391 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:05,274 If I wear this, I will seriously set back feminism 25 years. 392 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:08,193 The sexy assistant is an age-old magic tradition. Here... 393 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:09,944 Pick a card. 394 00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:13,489 - You got it? - Mm-hmm. 395 00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,161 Is this your card? 396 00:17:18,495 --> 00:17:19,495 No. 397 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:23,167 Did you want me to pick the seven of clubs in the first place? 398 00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:24,084 Yes. 399 00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:27,004 Because you have a second seven of clubs in your deck? 400 00:17:27,588 --> 00:17:29,715 - How did you know that? - Because I'm not an idiot. 401 00:17:30,340 --> 00:17:31,633 Here, give them to me. 402 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,595 Pick a card. 403 00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:37,347 Got it? 404 00:17:37,431 --> 00:17:38,431 Yeah. 405 00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:43,395 Give it a little tap. 406 00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:46,690 Is this your card? 407 00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:48,317 Wow, you're a natural. 408 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,902 Maybe you should do the tricks. 409 00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:50,985 Maybe. 410 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:53,447 But you know what that means. 411 00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:55,574 How do I look? 412 00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:58,035 Ohh! [chuckles] 413 00:17:58,577 --> 00:17:59,703 Honestly, 414 00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:01,413 it looks better on you. 415 00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,709 [Patty] Thank you for agreeing to participate 416 00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:08,587 in the first annual Miss Pretty in Prison competition. 417 00:18:08,670 --> 00:18:09,922 If I pick you as the winner, 418 00:18:10,005 --> 00:18:12,424 you will be excused from a week's worth of prison chores 419 00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:16,804 and you will go on to the national Misguided Beauty Competition 420 00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:19,556 in Billings, Montana, next month. Yay. 421 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:20,974 What makes you judge and jury? 422 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:23,894 Well, I just competed in Miss Georgia American Lady. 423 00:18:23,977 --> 00:18:27,189 That's why you look familiar. I saw you on the news. 424 00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,108 You blew up all those pageant girls. 425 00:18:29,191 --> 00:18:31,777 - No, I didn't. I promise. - [inmate 1] Yeah, we're all innocent. 426 00:18:31,860 --> 00:18:33,028 [inmate 2] I didn't do shit. 427 00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:34,488 Okay, here's the deal. 428 00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:36,171 The pageant will consist of three parts: 429 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,908 gowns, which you all make, 430 00:18:37,991 --> 00:18:39,952 a talent portion, and then an interview question. 431 00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:41,745 Question? What kind of question? 432 00:18:41,829 --> 00:18:43,539 Are you a narc? Like Krystal? 433 00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:45,541 Bitch, I ain't no narc! 434 00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:47,334 No. Oh... 435 00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:50,671 Knock it off, skank! She's trying to help us. 436 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,840 Yeah, let's skip the question, 437 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:55,634 and everyone go get your supplies to show me your talent, 438 00:18:55,717 --> 00:18:56,802 and we'll meet back here. 439 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:04,143 The girls seemed excited. 440 00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:06,645 And I didn't even really want to eat. 441 00:19:06,728 --> 00:19:09,273 Was it because I had found some sense of purpose? 442 00:19:09,356 --> 00:19:11,108 Maybe this was all gonna work out. 443 00:19:11,733 --> 00:19:12,733 Jesus! 444 00:19:12,776 --> 00:19:14,695 Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. 445 00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:16,655 I know your coach. 446 00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:18,991 He gave me a makeover a few months ago. 447 00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:20,200 Best day of my life. 448 00:19:21,243 --> 00:19:23,245 - Thanks for sharing. - No prob. 449 00:19:23,745 --> 00:19:26,331 I just wanted to say it was awesome to meet you, 450 00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:29,209 and, uh, you better pick me, or I will kill you. 451 00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,335 Wait, what? 452 00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:36,967 And, just so we're clear, that time I totally meant to scare you. 453 00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:41,805 It's simple. 454 00:19:41,889 --> 00:19:44,141 I win or you die. 455 00:19:45,475 --> 00:19:46,685 - Yo, bitch. - Ah! 456 00:19:46,768 --> 00:19:49,205 - How long have you been under there? - Don't worry about that. 457 00:19:49,229 --> 00:19:52,357 You just worry about making me the winner, or else you'll wake up dead. 458 00:19:56,153 --> 00:19:57,821 Oh, God. Not you too. 459 00:19:57,905 --> 00:19:59,239 Not me what, dear? 460 00:19:59,323 --> 00:20:03,452 I just wanted to thank you for giving me this opportunity. 461 00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:04,786 Sure. Of course. 462 00:20:04,870 --> 00:20:06,371 And if you don't pick me, 463 00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:09,249 I will gut you like the tragic fish you are. 464 00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:12,169 Toodles. 465 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:15,547 Eating and over-exercise were dangerous enough. 466 00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:17,549 Now this could kill me too. 467 00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:20,010 Maybe it was time to try a bit of honesty after all. 468 00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:23,842 Every single one of you has threatened to kill me if I don't pick you to win. 469 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:26,433 Seriously? Copycat bitches. 470 00:20:26,516 --> 00:20:29,478 Which means there's only one way out of this. 471 00:20:29,561 --> 00:20:31,021 - You die? - No. 472 00:20:32,147 --> 00:20:33,899 We need to have an honest pageant. 473 00:20:34,441 --> 00:20:37,110 If any one of you wins because you threatened me, it's cheating. 474 00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:39,905 - You think we care? We're criminals. - [Patty] You should care. 475 00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:41,907 Take it from someone who knows. 476 00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:43,367 Last two pageants I won 477 00:20:43,450 --> 00:20:46,161 because someone else got disqualified or murdered. 478 00:20:46,745 --> 00:20:49,373 It felt like crap knowing I didn't deserve the win. 479 00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:53,377 So here's my pitch: I'll coach all of you, for real, 480 00:20:53,752 --> 00:20:56,004 and whoever is the best, 481 00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:57,545 that'll be the honest win. 482 00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:01,760 [snorts] What, are we all in high school? What's next? Trust falls? 483 00:21:01,843 --> 00:21:03,845 I tuned out after "honest pageant." 484 00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:06,014 I'm gonna kill you just for suggesting it. 485 00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:07,098 Wait! 486 00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:08,557 Maybe Patty's right. 487 00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:11,645 Maybe none of us can ever really be honest 488 00:21:11,728 --> 00:21:13,772 about who we are or what we've done, 489 00:21:13,855 --> 00:21:17,150 but right here, right now, we can have an honest win. 490 00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:20,529 Plus, you all know you weren't really gonna kill her. 491 00:21:20,612 --> 00:21:22,906 I'm a hacker, Tanya's a money launderer, 492 00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:26,493 Krystal's a prostitute, and Summer's also a prostitute. 493 00:21:27,703 --> 00:21:28,704 None of us are murderers. 494 00:21:28,787 --> 00:21:30,038 Except me. 495 00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,122 Except her. 496 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,505 Wait. 497 00:21:38,588 --> 00:21:40,590 Was this a place I could tell the truth? 498 00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:43,093 That's right. I am. 499 00:21:45,721 --> 00:21:47,472 So you better not mess with me. 500 00:21:48,473 --> 00:21:49,473 Who's in? 501 00:21:56,982 --> 00:21:59,109 [Bob] Now that my campaign headquarters was handled, 502 00:21:59,192 --> 00:22:00,819 I could focus on my platform. 503 00:22:00,902 --> 00:22:04,031 Maybe choosing an outfit for the debate would inspire me. 504 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:07,034 What the hell? 505 00:22:17,753 --> 00:22:18,795 [phone rings] 506 00:22:22,549 --> 00:22:24,301 [grunting] 507 00:22:31,308 --> 00:22:33,727 [hip hop music plays] 508 00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:37,189 My talent is lock-picking. 509 00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:47,908 ♪ Rise up to the level that my name on ♪ 510 00:22:47,991 --> 00:22:49,701 ♪ 'Cause I am in the zone ♪ 511 00:22:49,785 --> 00:22:51,620 ♪ They be trying to get ahold of my halo ♪ 512 00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:53,622 ♪ But they never catch up 'cause they too slow ♪ 513 00:22:53,705 --> 00:22:55,457 ♪ That's cool I'mma do me, though ♪ 514 00:22:55,540 --> 00:22:58,043 ♪ 'Cause you already know I'mma do me ♪ 515 00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:01,922 ♪ 'Cause I'mma do me... ♪ 516 00:23:02,005 --> 00:23:04,205 [Patty] Yeah, that's so pretty. Is that an accent color? 517 00:23:04,257 --> 00:23:05,257 [inmate] Yeah. 518 00:23:06,468 --> 00:23:07,844 Shelby, 519 00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:10,013 you might want to go with a more festive color. 520 00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:12,849 But doody-brown is my spirit color. 521 00:23:12,933 --> 00:23:15,013 I don't even know what that means, but I support you. 522 00:23:15,936 --> 00:23:18,146 ♪ We all gotta face mo' hatin' ♪ 523 00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:19,439 [sewing machine whirring] 524 00:23:19,856 --> 00:23:21,817 ♪ Just love and live what we're sayin'... ♪ 525 00:23:22,192 --> 00:23:23,235 [Patty] Uh... 526 00:23:23,318 --> 00:23:24,486 Why are you walking like... 527 00:23:25,028 --> 00:23:26,655 What's going on with your butt? Relax. 528 00:23:33,245 --> 00:23:34,788 ♪ 'Cause I'mma do me ♪ 529 00:23:34,871 --> 00:23:35,705 [PA system beeps] 530 00:23:35,789 --> 00:23:38,041 [guard on PA] Patty Bladell, you have a visitor. 531 00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:39,000 Thank God. 532 00:23:39,084 --> 00:23:39,918 Great news. 533 00:23:40,001 --> 00:23:41,670 - You're getting me out of here? - No, 534 00:23:41,753 --> 00:23:44,089 but way to make my great news sound just sorta good. 535 00:23:44,172 --> 00:23:46,967 The police found security footage of a suspect planting the bomb. 536 00:23:47,050 --> 00:23:48,194 Then they can see it's not me? 537 00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:50,098 - That is great news. - Wait for it, Tinkerbell. 538 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:51,948 The footage is so grainy, they can't see who it is. 539 00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:55,434 Man, woman, non-binary, gender-fluid... Who knows? 540 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,477 But there is a timestamp, 541 00:23:57,561 --> 00:24:00,272 which means you need an alibi for 10:00 p.m. 542 00:24:00,856 --> 00:24:04,401 Someone who didn't squeeze you out of their uterus. Thoughts? 543 00:24:05,610 --> 00:24:07,779 My boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend. 544 00:24:07,863 --> 00:24:10,073 He came by the house right around 10:00 p.m. 545 00:24:10,157 --> 00:24:11,757 I can call him. Can I borrow your phone? 546 00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:13,827 You can remember people's numbers? 547 00:24:13,910 --> 00:24:16,389 I can't even remember the name of the guy I screwed last night. 548 00:24:16,413 --> 00:24:17,539 [line ringing] 549 00:24:17,622 --> 00:24:18,665 This is Henry. 550 00:24:18,748 --> 00:24:20,125 Hey, it's Patty. 551 00:24:20,208 --> 00:24:22,210 [line clicks, dial tone droning] 552 00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:30,469 [operator] The caller has blocked this number. 553 00:24:35,682 --> 00:24:37,476 I take it things didn't end well? 554 00:24:38,143 --> 00:24:39,143 No. 555 00:24:40,854 --> 00:24:43,982 All right. Look, I'll go talk to him. What's his address? 556 00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:46,485 Uh, yeah, that's the problem. 557 00:24:47,152 --> 00:24:48,904 He moved back to Minnesota with his family. 558 00:24:48,987 --> 00:24:50,447 I've no idea where. 559 00:24:50,530 --> 00:24:52,782 And Henry Lee is kind of a common name. 560 00:24:53,116 --> 00:24:54,451 Any other info that might help? 561 00:24:54,534 --> 00:24:57,537 He's pre-law, pre-med, 562 00:24:57,621 --> 00:24:58,538 and a stripper. 563 00:24:58,622 --> 00:25:00,832 Wow. You really screwed the pooch on this one, huh? 564 00:25:02,209 --> 00:25:04,336 He has a sister, Dixie. She owns the Wiener Taco. 565 00:25:04,878 --> 00:25:06,963 Dixie Sinclair? I know her. 566 00:25:07,672 --> 00:25:09,382 All right. Don't worry. 567 00:25:09,466 --> 00:25:10,509 I will get this done. 568 00:25:11,718 --> 00:25:13,038 - [door closing] - [Nonnie] Angie! 569 00:25:13,303 --> 00:25:14,304 Angie! 570 00:25:14,387 --> 00:25:15,514 Angie! Hi. 571 00:25:15,597 --> 00:25:16,806 What the hell happened? 572 00:25:17,140 --> 00:25:19,226 Oh, Nonnie. [laughs] 573 00:25:19,309 --> 00:25:20,769 A funny story... 574 00:25:20,852 --> 00:25:22,437 Oh, no. Did you relapse? 575 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,564 No. No! 576 00:25:24,898 --> 00:25:28,151 I'm just coming off the AnaConDa... 577 00:25:28,693 --> 00:25:31,112 ana... stevia. 578 00:25:31,196 --> 00:25:32,906 I got my implants removed. 579 00:25:32,989 --> 00:25:34,950 You're doing this while your daughter's in prison? 580 00:25:35,033 --> 00:25:37,536 I'm trying to get her out. 581 00:25:37,911 --> 00:25:39,913 My boobs were full of cock. 582 00:25:40,580 --> 00:25:42,499 Cocaine. Look. 583 00:25:44,501 --> 00:25:46,211 Oh... Why did you call me here, Angie? 584 00:25:46,294 --> 00:25:49,756 As a future law enforcement officer, I can't know this. 585 00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:52,175 Oh, honey. No, it's fine. I need your help. 586 00:25:52,926 --> 00:25:55,262 Your dad, he has connections 587 00:25:55,345 --> 00:25:56,555 to drug dealers, 588 00:25:57,514 --> 00:26:01,351 and they can smell it, sell it, and then I can pay her lawyer. 589 00:26:04,938 --> 00:26:08,066 [Bob] Coralee messed with my most prized possession, 590 00:26:08,149 --> 00:26:11,152 so I was gonna destroy hers. 591 00:26:14,531 --> 00:26:16,408 Bob! Bob! 592 00:26:16,491 --> 00:26:17,325 What have you done? 593 00:26:17,409 --> 00:26:20,662 Maybe you shouldn't have stolen all of my suits. 594 00:26:20,745 --> 00:26:22,831 I took 'em to the dry cleaners, you shit. 595 00:26:23,456 --> 00:26:26,668 I didn't tear them to pieces. [gasps] 596 00:26:26,751 --> 00:26:29,796 Oh, my God. Why would you do this to me? This is my future. 597 00:26:31,673 --> 00:26:32,966 What is wrong with you? 598 00:26:33,592 --> 00:26:34,944 I'm sorry. I don't... I don't know. 599 00:26:34,968 --> 00:26:35,968 No. 600 00:26:36,803 --> 00:26:37,803 Save your apology. 601 00:26:38,763 --> 00:26:40,181 This is war. 602 00:26:46,271 --> 00:26:48,565 I still don't get why we had to make that video. 603 00:26:48,648 --> 00:26:50,692 I'll just get my message out at the debate tomorrow. 604 00:26:51,484 --> 00:26:54,404 It's important to give people an idea of what you stand for ahead of time, 605 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:56,716 so they don't think you're just reacting to your opponent. 606 00:26:56,740 --> 00:26:59,200 - Yeah. - I'm posting it on ShenaniCam right now. 607 00:26:59,284 --> 00:27:02,370 What, just the raw footage? Shouldn't we get it professionally edited? 608 00:27:02,454 --> 00:27:04,497 With what funding? It's good. 609 00:27:05,081 --> 00:27:06,958 - Yeah. - It's gritty, 610 00:27:07,792 --> 00:27:09,085 - relatable. - Yeah. 611 00:27:09,169 --> 00:27:10,337 And you look hot in it. 612 00:27:10,420 --> 00:27:11,630 - Do I? - Yeah. 613 00:27:12,297 --> 00:27:14,007 [grunts] 614 00:27:14,090 --> 00:27:15,300 Yes, please. 615 00:27:16,092 --> 00:27:17,552 - [phone ringing] - I'm sorry. 616 00:27:17,636 --> 00:27:19,304 - Sorry. - Ignore it. 617 00:27:20,388 --> 00:27:21,389 Yeah. 618 00:27:25,685 --> 00:27:29,189 Oh, look, I'm sorry. I gotta... I gotta go to Coralee's. 619 00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:31,274 She says it's an emergency. 620 00:27:31,358 --> 00:27:34,319 Seriously? I mean, she calls and you just drop everything? 621 00:27:34,402 --> 00:27:35,904 She's my best friend. 622 00:27:36,279 --> 00:27:37,599 You sure it's not more than that? 623 00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:40,240 Don't be jealous. 624 00:27:40,950 --> 00:27:42,619 I'll be back before you know it. 625 00:27:56,716 --> 00:27:59,511 I won't let you get away, Bob. [inhales] 626 00:27:59,594 --> 00:28:00,929 Either one of you. 627 00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:08,436 Ladies! Ladies! 628 00:28:09,396 --> 00:28:10,772 Good evening, ladies and guards. 629 00:28:11,231 --> 00:28:14,109 Welcome to the first ever Waters Correctional Facility's 630 00:28:14,192 --> 00:28:16,528 Pretty in Prison Beauty Pageant. 631 00:28:16,611 --> 00:28:18,738 ["Batches & Cookies" by Lizzo feat. Sophia Eris plays] 632 00:28:20,448 --> 00:28:25,453 And now welcome to the stage the beguiling and beautiful Miss Krystal. 633 00:28:25,537 --> 00:28:28,140 ♪ Remember that gooey gooey you took And said, "Ooh wee, ooh wee" ♪ 634 00:28:28,164 --> 00:28:30,834 ♪ I need two or two-eee of these for my baby boo-ee ooo-ee ♪ 635 00:28:30,917 --> 00:28:33,169 ♪ Talking like boobies You got a nice pair like some... ♪ 636 00:28:33,253 --> 00:28:36,256 ♪ And you high off that doobie doobie with your Mystery Machine ♪ 637 00:28:36,339 --> 00:28:38,091 Miss Tanya. 638 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,094 ♪ Hanging with them creepy creepies... ♪ 639 00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:44,514 ♪ Lookin' holy holy while looking through them holy holies ♪ 640 00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:48,601 ♪ Batches and cookies I got my batches and cookies ♪ 641 00:28:49,018 --> 00:28:51,062 [Patty] For a moment, we all got to escape. 642 00:28:51,771 --> 00:28:53,440 I got to be honest. 643 00:28:53,523 --> 00:28:54,983 They got to feel pretty in prison. 644 00:28:55,066 --> 00:28:56,484 Miss Cindy. 645 00:28:57,610 --> 00:28:59,112 Miss Navi. 646 00:29:00,238 --> 00:29:03,158 Maybe I could find freedom behind bars after all. 647 00:29:03,241 --> 00:29:04,241 Miss Summer. 648 00:29:11,249 --> 00:29:16,296 And last but not least, the audacious and enchanting Miss Shelby. 649 00:29:16,379 --> 00:29:18,047 [cheering] 650 00:29:20,633 --> 00:29:21,634 [applause dies down] 651 00:29:21,718 --> 00:29:23,219 Miss Shelby? 652 00:29:26,598 --> 00:29:28,141 - Night, Marty. - [Marty] See ya. 653 00:29:32,187 --> 00:29:34,105 She's gone. Sound the alarm! 654 00:29:34,189 --> 00:29:35,315 [alarm blares] 655 00:29:43,448 --> 00:29:46,534 So much for the truth setting me free. Shelby lied. 656 00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:48,036 You help Shelby escape! 657 00:29:48,578 --> 00:29:51,790 All that "let's have an honest pageant win" was crap! 658 00:29:51,873 --> 00:29:53,666 No, no, it wasn't. I... I promise. 659 00:29:53,750 --> 00:29:57,003 If we all kill you together, they can't throw any of us in the hole. 660 00:29:58,296 --> 00:29:59,296 What's the hole? 661 00:29:59,672 --> 00:30:00,672 Where you're going. 662 00:30:01,049 --> 00:30:03,968 - I should have never trusted you. - [inmate] Lock her up. 663 00:30:04,469 --> 00:30:07,597 I didn't do... I didn't know she was... 664 00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:11,392 [inmates chanting] Lock her up! 665 00:30:12,936 --> 00:30:14,479 [Bob] This was harder than I thought. 666 00:30:14,562 --> 00:30:16,397 Why couldn't I just come up with a platform? 667 00:30:16,481 --> 00:30:17,481 [knocking at door] 668 00:30:20,568 --> 00:30:21,568 - Hey. - Hey. 669 00:30:23,112 --> 00:30:24,113 [door closes] 670 00:30:24,197 --> 00:30:25,323 Barnard. 671 00:30:26,407 --> 00:30:27,492 Nice wall. 672 00:30:27,951 --> 00:30:30,495 We're gonna go upstairs and prep for his debate. 673 00:30:36,459 --> 00:30:38,086 Maybe I needed a snack. 674 00:30:39,128 --> 00:30:41,047 Let's see. My platform. 675 00:30:41,130 --> 00:30:43,216 What did I want from Masonville? 676 00:30:43,299 --> 00:30:46,678 Designer outlets? Haberdashery? Bathhouse? 677 00:30:46,761 --> 00:30:47,988 - [creaking] - [Barnard] Coralee! 678 00:30:48,012 --> 00:30:49,347 [Coralee] Oh, Bob! 679 00:30:50,223 --> 00:30:51,516 Take off my bra! 680 00:30:51,599 --> 00:30:53,309 [Barnard] I am! I'm gonna take it off! 681 00:30:53,393 --> 00:30:54,644 - Bob! Oh, yes! - [smacking] 682 00:30:54,727 --> 00:30:57,230 [Barnard] Somebody's being a bad girl! 683 00:30:57,313 --> 00:30:59,190 It's me. Get it, Bob. Get it. 684 00:30:59,274 --> 00:31:01,442 Here you go. See, isn't this fun? 685 00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:04,946 I can't believe I'm doing this. I should be focusing on the debate. 686 00:31:05,029 --> 00:31:08,074 Doing this is helping you too, okay? We're messing with his head. 687 00:31:08,157 --> 00:31:10,743 - Oh, Coralee! - Back door, no babies! 688 00:31:11,202 --> 00:31:12,871 That feels so good! 689 00:31:12,954 --> 00:31:14,998 - Whoo! - Coralee! 690 00:31:15,623 --> 00:31:18,126 Coralee, I love you! I love you! 691 00:31:18,209 --> 00:31:20,503 [Coralee] I love you and your penis. 692 00:31:20,587 --> 00:31:23,965 Oh, I love it when you touch me there in that spot. 693 00:31:24,048 --> 00:31:25,049 - [thud] - [Coralee yelps] 694 00:31:25,133 --> 00:31:27,468 - Shit. Coralee? - What the fuck? 695 00:31:28,678 --> 00:31:31,639 Are you all right? Oh, no. You're bleeding. 696 00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:32,849 - I am? - Yeah. 697 00:31:32,932 --> 00:31:35,143 - I faint at the sight of blood. - You do? 698 00:31:35,226 --> 00:31:37,228 What in the hell is going on?! 699 00:31:37,312 --> 00:31:38,980 Wait. You guys were faking? 700 00:31:39,063 --> 00:31:40,273 No, Bob, leave! 701 00:31:40,356 --> 00:31:43,610 Because Barnard's gonna faint, and Bob faints at the sight of fainting. 702 00:31:43,693 --> 00:31:45,278 No, that was just that one time... 703 00:31:48,281 --> 00:31:51,743 Ugh, men are useless. 704 00:31:57,290 --> 00:32:00,335 [Patty] I had been in here for hours, but it felt like a month. 705 00:32:00,418 --> 00:32:02,629 All I wanted to do was eat. 706 00:32:02,712 --> 00:32:05,548 At least here in solitary I was safe from those girls. 707 00:32:05,632 --> 00:32:06,912 [Patty] You're not safe from me. 708 00:32:09,302 --> 00:32:10,887 What the hell? 709 00:32:11,804 --> 00:32:13,181 You'll never be safe. 710 00:32:13,264 --> 00:32:15,642 Not until you can be honest with yourself. 711 00:32:15,725 --> 00:32:16,809 What are you talking about? 712 00:32:16,893 --> 00:32:20,313 Of course, I'm honest with myself. I know everything I've done. 713 00:32:21,898 --> 00:32:22,899 But do you know why? 714 00:32:22,982 --> 00:32:25,151 I killed Christian to protect Magnolia. 715 00:32:25,568 --> 00:32:28,112 I threw those bodies in Gator Bog to protect my mom. 716 00:32:28,196 --> 00:32:29,196 If you still think that, 717 00:32:29,238 --> 00:32:31,074 you're not being honest with yourself at all. 718 00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:34,034 What do you mean? 719 00:32:34,452 --> 00:32:36,454 [distant yelling] 720 00:32:39,415 --> 00:32:40,875 Today's your lucky day. 721 00:32:40,959 --> 00:32:43,670 Your alibi came through, and we're dropping the Shelby thing. 722 00:32:43,753 --> 00:32:45,880 Your lawyer's scary as fuck. 723 00:32:45,964 --> 00:32:48,174 So good luck at Miss American Lady. 724 00:32:48,508 --> 00:32:49,592 It's back on? 725 00:32:49,676 --> 00:32:51,844 Oh, right. You haven't seen the news. 726 00:32:51,928 --> 00:32:54,088 I guess people want to see if another girl gets killed. 727 00:32:54,847 --> 00:32:56,474 Let's process you and get you out. 728 00:32:56,849 --> 00:32:58,434 [Patty] I was finally getting out. 729 00:32:58,935 --> 00:33:00,895 So why didn't I feel free? 730 00:33:01,729 --> 00:33:03,314 Was Bloody Patty right? 731 00:33:03,398 --> 00:33:05,566 Was there something I was hiding from myself? 732 00:33:06,776 --> 00:33:08,695 [Angie] You're a good friend, Nonnie. 733 00:33:08,778 --> 00:33:10,738 To Patty and to me. 734 00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:13,408 I'm just... I'm sorry you had to compromise your morals. 735 00:33:13,491 --> 00:33:17,495 Oh, I didn't. The second we made the drop, I called in an anonymous tip. 736 00:33:17,954 --> 00:33:19,747 Oh, shit. Girl, you really are a cop. 737 00:33:19,831 --> 00:33:20,831 [phone chimes] 738 00:33:24,752 --> 00:33:26,713 Patty's getting out! Patty's getting out! 739 00:33:26,796 --> 00:33:27,796 [exclaiming] 740 00:33:28,339 --> 00:33:29,339 Oh, my God! 741 00:33:29,382 --> 00:33:33,052 And after... Oh, after I pay her lawyer, I'm gonna have 90 grand left. 742 00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:35,054 I could buy a plane. I could buy a Ferris wheel. 743 00:33:35,138 --> 00:33:36,681 I could buy a fucking otter farm. 744 00:33:36,764 --> 00:33:39,308 Or, now that Patty's off the hook, 745 00:33:39,392 --> 00:33:41,978 maybe we could all go to Miss American Lady. 746 00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:44,814 I mean, after the week we've had, we deserve it, right? 747 00:33:44,897 --> 00:33:45,897 - Yeah. - Whoo! 748 00:33:47,567 --> 00:33:48,818 [Angie] Nonnie was right. 749 00:33:48,901 --> 00:33:53,031 I had finally done right by my daughter. We did deserve a reward. 750 00:33:57,201 --> 00:33:58,453 Thank you! 751 00:34:03,624 --> 00:34:06,753 [Bob] Some people talk about draining the swamp. 752 00:34:06,836 --> 00:34:07,754 Well, talk's cheap. 753 00:34:07,837 --> 00:34:12,967 I'm gonna put my money where my mouth is and drain an actual swamp... 754 00:34:13,051 --> 00:34:14,343 Gator Bog. 755 00:34:14,927 --> 00:34:17,638 And on that land, I'm gonna build a new jail 756 00:34:17,722 --> 00:34:19,307 'cause the old one has bedbugs. 757 00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:24,270 - Bob Barnard for mayor. I got this. - [Angie] No, no, no. 758 00:34:25,855 --> 00:34:29,442 No need for stitches. No nausea, so no risk of concussion. 759 00:34:29,525 --> 00:34:31,085 And most importantly, the baby is fine. 760 00:34:35,031 --> 00:34:35,948 Did you not know? 761 00:34:36,032 --> 00:34:37,617 No, but you know what? 762 00:34:37,700 --> 00:34:40,578 I've always been irregular, so maybe, you know, I'm just... 763 00:34:40,661 --> 00:34:43,372 According to my calculations, you're about eight or nine weeks. 764 00:34:48,544 --> 00:34:49,670 Should we call the father? 765 00:34:49,754 --> 00:34:51,047 [Barnard] I got your text. 766 00:34:51,130 --> 00:34:52,173 Are you okay? 767 00:34:52,256 --> 00:34:53,257 What did the doctor say? 768 00:34:54,092 --> 00:34:56,052 I'll give you some privacy. 769 00:34:58,096 --> 00:34:59,096 So? 770 00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:02,934 I'm fine. I'm good. 771 00:35:03,017 --> 00:35:04,560 Oh, thank God. 772 00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:07,539 - You want me to give you a ride home? - I'll give her a ride. I live there. 773 00:35:07,563 --> 00:35:08,397 No. You know what? 774 00:35:08,481 --> 00:35:11,081 I'm not going home with either of you. I'm fine. I'm staying here. 775 00:35:11,150 --> 00:35:13,444 The doctor wants me to stay just to keep an eye on me. 776 00:35:13,528 --> 00:35:14,779 You guys go. I'm fine. 777 00:35:15,238 --> 00:35:16,280 Are you sure? 778 00:35:17,448 --> 00:35:18,449 Absolutely. 779 00:35:28,876 --> 00:35:29,877 [phone beeping] 780 00:35:31,003 --> 00:35:35,383 Patty is out of jail. Totally innocent. I think you owe me an apology. 781 00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:36,384 Me? 782 00:35:36,467 --> 00:35:39,387 You're the one who just tore up all Coralee's Tampoozles. 783 00:35:39,470 --> 00:35:40,638 Why the hell did you do that? 784 00:35:40,721 --> 00:35:43,881 Why the hell would you pretend to have sex with Coralee? Just to get back at me? 785 00:35:43,933 --> 00:35:46,144 Don't you have better things to worry about? 786 00:35:46,227 --> 00:35:49,856 Oh, like preparing for the debate tomorrow that you challenged me to? 787 00:35:49,939 --> 00:35:52,084 [Bob Armstrong] I had been trying to prepare, hadn't I? 788 00:35:52,108 --> 00:35:55,695 You still running just to get back at me? You even care what the issues are? 789 00:35:55,778 --> 00:35:58,489 Of course I cared. So why'd I let myself get so distracted? 790 00:35:58,573 --> 00:36:00,199 - I care. - Yeah, sure. 791 00:36:00,950 --> 00:36:03,703 From what I see, all you care about is building a wall, 792 00:36:03,786 --> 00:36:07,248 tearing up Tampoozles, and being an asshole to your ex-wife. 793 00:36:07,331 --> 00:36:09,792 Which one of those is your platform? 794 00:36:09,876 --> 00:36:11,002 You even want to win? 795 00:36:11,085 --> 00:36:11,961 'Course I do. 796 00:36:12,044 --> 00:36:14,213 Except I had never won anything in my life, 797 00:36:14,297 --> 00:36:17,091 and the idea of it scared the shit out of me. 798 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:18,926 Was I getting in my own way? 799 00:36:19,010 --> 00:36:21,846 Self-sabotaging because I was afraid to win? 800 00:36:21,929 --> 00:36:23,055 Bob... 801 00:36:24,056 --> 00:36:25,141 you should just drop out. 802 00:36:25,933 --> 00:36:27,727 I think it'd be best for everyone. 803 00:36:28,269 --> 00:36:31,731 But maybe I wasn't the only one who was scared I might win. 804 00:36:31,814 --> 00:36:33,399 You're afraid you might lose. 805 00:36:34,817 --> 00:36:37,403 - I am not. - Of course you are. 806 00:36:37,486 --> 00:36:39,646 If you weren't, you wouldn't be trying to make me quit. 807 00:36:39,697 --> 00:36:44,118 That is not true. I've never lost anything in my entire life. 808 00:36:44,202 --> 00:36:45,870 I'll see you at the debate, Bob. 809 00:36:46,746 --> 00:36:48,039 Master debater. 810 00:36:51,417 --> 00:36:52,585 That's not funny! 811 00:36:54,587 --> 00:36:55,588 [man] Knock, knock. 812 00:36:56,756 --> 00:36:59,175 Oh, Detective Cruz. Hi. 813 00:36:59,258 --> 00:37:01,135 I thought you were the discharge nurse. 814 00:37:01,219 --> 00:37:03,859 The hospital actually contacted me to talk to you before you leave. 815 00:37:03,930 --> 00:37:05,723 Really? Why? 816 00:37:05,806 --> 00:37:06,724 Standard procedure. 817 00:37:06,807 --> 00:37:08,976 When a woman has an accident in the home 818 00:37:09,060 --> 00:37:10,860 that looks like it could be domestic violence, 819 00:37:10,937 --> 00:37:12,563 I need to make sure everything's okay. 820 00:37:12,647 --> 00:37:15,024 Well, that's good to hear. 821 00:37:15,107 --> 00:37:17,485 I mean, not for me, but for other people. 822 00:37:18,152 --> 00:37:21,447 I can assure you that this was just a dumb accident. 823 00:37:22,865 --> 00:37:23,865 Are you pregnant? 824 00:37:24,242 --> 00:37:25,826 Well, that's exciting news. 825 00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:27,828 Congratulations. How far along? 826 00:37:27,912 --> 00:37:29,747 Uh, eight or nine weeks. 827 00:37:30,289 --> 00:37:31,289 Mmm. 828 00:37:32,583 --> 00:37:34,263 Can you do me a favor and not tell anyone? 829 00:37:34,335 --> 00:37:37,713 I mean, I haven't said anything to anyone yet, so... 830 00:37:37,797 --> 00:37:39,257 Oh, your secret's safe with me. 831 00:37:41,592 --> 00:37:43,761 Tell you what, what if I give you a ride home? 832 00:37:45,471 --> 00:37:47,151 Again, sorry to have to put you back there. 833 00:37:47,223 --> 00:37:48,583 I have all this equipment up here. 834 00:37:48,641 --> 00:37:50,685 Oh, no, it's fine, Detective. 835 00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:54,689 Yeah, it's been a while since I've been in the back of a police car. 836 00:37:55,481 --> 00:37:56,691 I had a wild youth. 837 00:37:57,191 --> 00:37:58,818 [laughs] Good for you. 838 00:38:00,111 --> 00:38:02,071 Oh, Detective, you just passed my street. 839 00:38:03,572 --> 00:38:05,616 Hello? I live back there. 840 00:38:05,700 --> 00:38:07,618 This will go a lot easier if you stay calm. 841 00:38:07,702 --> 00:38:08,953 What will? 842 00:38:10,454 --> 00:38:11,580 What's happening? 843 00:38:13,582 --> 00:38:14,667 Detective? 844 00:38:15,751 --> 00:38:16,794 Detective! 845 00:38:17,336 --> 00:38:19,463 - Stop the car. - [engine revving] 846 00:38:20,715 --> 00:38:21,757 Help! 847 00:38:22,967 --> 00:38:23,967 Let me out! No! 848 00:38:24,510 --> 00:38:25,511 No! 849 00:38:26,470 --> 00:38:27,763 Stop the car! 850 00:38:28,306 --> 00:38:30,474 Help! Help!