1 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:13,514 I felt hungrier than ever. 2 00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,850 But it wasn't just my stomach that felt empty. 3 00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:21,230 Nonnie had dumped me, my mom ran off to who knows where, 4 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:25,108 and Bob Armstrong hated me for outing him and Bob Barnard. 5 00:00:26,610 --> 00:00:27,986 And who could blame him? 6 00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:29,571 I hated me too. 7 00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:32,449 I spent the last week hiding out, 8 00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:35,911 stuffing my face, and already none of my pants fit. 9 00:00:37,621 --> 00:00:41,124 I knew food wasn't gonna fix my problems, but what else could I do? 10 00:00:47,673 --> 00:00:49,758 And then I got my answer. 11 00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:53,845 Drew Barrymore was coming to Atlanta? 12 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:56,306 It was divine intervention, 13 00:00:56,807 --> 00:00:58,809 like a sign from God herself. 14 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:03,480 Drew wouldn't give up like a loser and eat her way into oblivion. 15 00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:06,400 So, what would Drew Barrymore do? 16 00:01:15,284 --> 00:01:17,077 She'd clean up her mess. 17 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,996 Make amends for what she'd done. 18 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,207 Like in Never Been Kissed, when Drew writes that article 19 00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:24,710 telling everyone Michael Vartan's not really a perv. 20 00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,754 But I couldn't start with Bob. 21 00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:29,673 He hated me the most. 22 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,426 At least I didn't ruin Nonnie's life. 23 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,928 I just hoped she would take my call. 24 00:01:42,978 --> 00:01:47,024 You know that you picking me up from rehab doesn't mean we're back together, right? 25 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:47,983 Obviously. 26 00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:51,778 But I figure if I've got to go to dinner with my dad and his new boyfriend, 27 00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:53,697 who better to do it with than my ex-girlfriend 28 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:55,198 whose dad's dating my dad? 29 00:01:58,869 --> 00:02:00,370 Were you mad when you found out? 30 00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:02,664 I was furious. 31 00:02:02,748 --> 00:02:06,251 But now, I have compassion for him. 32 00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:09,880 You know? It must've been tough, keeping that side of himself 33 00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,506 hidden for so long. 34 00:02:11,590 --> 00:02:13,634 I wish I could be that compassionate. 35 00:02:13,717 --> 00:02:15,677 My mom hasn't left the house since they got outed. 36 00:02:16,219 --> 00:02:19,848 Plus, I just keep on picturing it, you know, your dad on top of my dad, 37 00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:23,101 - my dad on top of your dad... - Okay, maybe I should have taken an Uber. 38 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:29,608 Hey. Magnolia and Brick are already on their way. 39 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,694 You are gonna put on a shirt before they get here, right? 40 00:02:32,778 --> 00:02:35,572 Of course. Just didn't wanna get grease on my clothes. 41 00:02:35,947 --> 00:02:38,408 Relax, it'll all be fine. 42 00:02:39,618 --> 00:02:41,370 How...? How do you know? 43 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:44,247 We've just been hiding out here since Patty outed us. 44 00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:47,417 Dodging the stares, avoiding reality. 45 00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:49,044 Ain't it been kind of nice? 46 00:02:49,419 --> 00:02:50,837 Like a honeymoon? 47 00:02:50,921 --> 00:02:54,174 I mean, Etta Mae agreed to the divorce, so we can finally be ourselves. 48 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:57,928 Speak for yourself. I don't even know that this is who I am. 49 00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,055 Come on, you going back to thinking you're not gay? 50 00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:02,099 I... I feel like a lesbian, Bob. 51 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,518 We moved in together after a week. 52 00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,104 I don't know, you... You and I, 53 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,272 in this house, living like this, 54 00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:10,941 I didn't choose it. 55 00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,317 - Patty did. - Look. 56 00:03:12,984 --> 00:03:15,946 You can move forward if you just let yourself. 57 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:19,241 Maybe smoothing things over with Brick's a good start. 58 00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:23,412 Okay? Here we go. 59 00:03:25,664 --> 00:03:27,374 - Shirt! - Oh, right. 60 00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:35,006 So, Brick... 61 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:39,094 we made your favorite, pork chops. 62 00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:42,681 I haven't had pork since my buddy Andy got a pet pig a year ago. 63 00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:46,977 Well, I can make you something else. 64 00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,520 It's fine. I'm barely hungry. 65 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,523 Sorry, Brick, I'm trying. I'm nervous. 66 00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:54,234 I don't... I don't know how to act around you guys. 67 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:57,446 It's okay, Bob. Just be yourself. 68 00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:59,197 Yeah, a cheater and a liar. 69 00:03:59,489 --> 00:04:04,035 All right, Brick. I know it is strange to see me with a man. 70 00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:05,954 Trust me, it is a surprise for me too. 71 00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:07,372 Then you're the only one. 72 00:04:07,873 --> 00:04:11,877 Dad, you are a man obsessed with shoes and purses. Big shock, you're gay. 73 00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:13,378 - I'm bi. - Whatever. 74 00:04:13,462 --> 00:04:16,298 Gay, bi, straight, trans. That is fine. 75 00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:18,967 What's not fine is the two of you deciding to break up two families 76 00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:19,885 like it's nothing. 77 00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:22,262 - Okay, Brick, easy. - I don't think I was talking to you. 78 00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,765 All right, Brick, please be respectful. 79 00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:26,183 You know what? I can't do this. 80 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:30,520 Bob, you tried. He just needs some time. You've got to let him go. 81 00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:34,483 So... 82 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,027 you still eat pork, right? 83 00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:48,955 How the hell did you get in here? I changed the locks. 84 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,708 The spare's still under the doormat. 85 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:55,170 Well, aren't you a regular Sherlock homosexual? 86 00:04:58,006 --> 00:05:00,091 - Please leave. - Have you seen Brick? 87 00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:02,344 He and I were about to have dinner. 88 00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:04,262 It did not go well, and I just wanna talk. 89 00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:07,432 - He's not here. - Well, his car is outside. 90 00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:09,476 Well, maybe he went for a run. 91 00:05:09,935 --> 00:05:12,437 But it sounds like he doesn't wanna talk to you, Bob. 92 00:05:12,521 --> 00:05:15,232 And quite frankly, neither do I, so please go. 93 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:18,819 Coralee, we need to be able to talk about our son. 94 00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:21,196 Okay, I am filing for a divorce, Bob. 95 00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:23,532 No. 96 00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:28,453 - I don't want a divorce. - What did you think was gonna happen? 97 00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:31,873 Did you think that we were gonna stay married even though you're gay? 98 00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:33,625 I'm not gay, I'm bi. 99 00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:35,460 You are Brokeback, Bob. 100 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,797 Two gay men, married to women, 101 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:42,008 thinking about each other while sleeping with your unsuspecting wives. 102 00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:46,221 That is not true. We both love sex with women. 103 00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:49,307 Even though he says he's gay, which makes no sense to me at all... 104 00:05:49,391 --> 00:05:50,892 Because it's bullshit! 105 00:05:50,976 --> 00:05:52,853 Okay? It is bullshit. 106 00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:59,651 Our entire marriage has been a lie. 107 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,152 That's not true. 108 00:06:01,653 --> 00:06:02,529 I love you. 109 00:06:03,572 --> 00:06:05,282 No, no. No, no, no. 110 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:07,784 Don't you say that to me. 111 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:10,954 You don't ever get to say that to me again. 112 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:14,374 You are still the sexiest woman I've ever seen, 113 00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:17,586 but there is this whole other part of me 114 00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:20,005 - that I didn't even know… - Oh, okay, okay. You know what? 115 00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:23,216 Go be sexually confused in someone else's kitchen. 116 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,261 Like maybe your boyfriend's. 117 00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:30,974 Coralee, I was willing to give you the space to work through your stuff. 118 00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:33,643 - Can't you do that for me? - No, I... I... No. 119 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:37,606 Not about this. 120 00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:40,817 Leave the key on the counter. 121 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:45,655 I am done. 122 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,085 When Nonnie wouldn't take my calls, 123 00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:01,046 I got Choi to help me track her down. 124 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:03,548 Hey, Patty. 125 00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:06,843 You haven't been in school, haven't been answering my calls or texts. 126 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,678 - I was worried about you. - Don't be. 127 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:13,224 And not answering your calls and texts is a hint that I don't wanna talk to you. 128 00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:17,687 Please let me make it up to you. I... got you a birthday present. 129 00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,524 Have you just been, like, carrying that around with you? 130 00:07:22,692 --> 00:07:24,653 How did you know I was gonna be here? 131 00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:27,697 - Are you stalking me? - Come on, just take it. 132 00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:30,575 - Take it. - I don't wanna take anything from you. 133 00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:32,410 Please, just leave me alone. 134 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,084 I should have been worried that I had a stalker, 135 00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:42,295 but I was more worried about fixing things with my best friend. 136 00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,175 Hey. 137 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:48,969 Hey, Patty. 138 00:07:50,220 --> 00:07:51,262 Fancy meeting you here! 139 00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:56,601 Choi, did you set me up? 140 00:07:57,060 --> 00:07:59,938 All right, I'm sorry. I think it's weird you guys aren't friends anymore. 141 00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:04,359 You're like peanut butter and jelly, or Charlie Manson and Sharon Tate, 142 00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:06,945 - or Jerry Lewis and... - Okay, Choi. 143 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,780 - We get it. - ...Dean Martin. 144 00:08:08,863 --> 00:08:11,658 Um, look, I brought you a peace offering. 145 00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:13,660 I don't know if you heard, but, 146 00:08:14,244 --> 00:08:17,372 Drew Barrymore is coming into town to sign her newest book. 147 00:08:17,455 --> 00:08:20,750 And I realized that seeing her wouldn't mean anything without you. 148 00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:22,377 So, I got us tickets. 149 00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:24,629 You really don't get it, do you? 150 00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:27,841 I told you I needed a break, 151 00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:31,177 which means it's up to me to decide when that break is over. 152 00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:32,178 Not you. 153 00:08:33,221 --> 00:08:36,266 And for the record, I don't even like Drew anymore. 154 00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:38,560 I like Charlize Theron now. 155 00:08:45,483 --> 00:08:47,527 Sorry. Anything I can do? 156 00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:49,154 Coralee. 157 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:53,241 No, but there was something I could do. 158 00:08:53,324 --> 00:08:55,493 Coralee. Half a dozen hard, half a dozen soft, 159 00:08:55,577 --> 00:08:56,828 two wet tods, 160 00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:00,373 one wien rings, two fudgy wieners, and Diet Coke. 161 00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:02,042 It's not all for me. 162 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:06,671 Coralee, can we talk? 163 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:10,467 See? I have a friend joining me. Get over here. 164 00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:16,931 I really wanna make amends for what I did. 165 00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:19,100 I wanna find a way to make it up to you. 166 00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:22,645 Well, you could start by eating half this food. 167 00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:24,689 You'd be saving me from myself. 168 00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:29,611 So, wait, you don't... like, totally hate me? 169 00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,072 Well, I did hate you... 170 00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:35,033 for giving me the necklace from Stella Rose, 171 00:09:35,116 --> 00:09:36,826 and for trying to steal Bob. 172 00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:39,913 Which I completely regret, now more than ever. 173 00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:44,751 Well, obviously it doesn't matter since he prefers wieners over tacos. 174 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:52,008 I think you did me a favor, Patty, by outing Bob. 175 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,469 Well, I needed to know the truth, 176 00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:57,597 and now I can move on with my life, you know? 177 00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:00,475 I'm just gonna drown my sorrows in some wieners, 178 00:10:00,558 --> 00:10:03,812 and then maybe get an investor for Tampazzle. 179 00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:06,231 - Tamp... whatzel? - Tampazzle. 180 00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:10,568 It's a tampon with a tassel, so you could pull it right out. 181 00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,404 Oh, my God, I would totally use that. 182 00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:16,866 I know, right? And Bob totally didn't get it. 183 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:21,746 I swear, losing Bob might be the best thing that ever happened to me. 184 00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:24,207 Because now, I can be the me 185 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:27,252 I always wanted to be without Bob getting in the way. 186 00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:30,505 At least one of us felt better off without Bob. 187 00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,549 And you can be too, Patty. 188 00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:34,342 Did I say that out loud? 189 00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:37,053 You are smart. You don't need Bob pushing you around, 190 00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:39,264 and you certainly don't need pageants. 191 00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:40,431 Except I do. 192 00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:43,726 I've been smart my whole life, I've gotten straight A's. 193 00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:47,647 But nobody's dying to take the valedictorian to prom. 194 00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:53,069 I just wanna know what it feels like to be beautiful. 195 00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:57,532 You are beautiful. 196 00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:58,867 I don't feel it. 197 00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,077 I got thin. 198 00:11:01,870 --> 00:11:04,789 I got thin, I got a boyfriend, I got new friends... 199 00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,876 and I still feel like a loser. 200 00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:09,127 Oh, honey. 201 00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,962 I just keep thinking that if... 202 00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:14,048 If I could get up there, on that stage with those girls, 203 00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:15,925 and if I could win that crown... 204 00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:19,512 then maybe I would feel like... 205 00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:23,183 I was finally enough. 206 00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:29,105 I get it. You want the brass ring. 207 00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:30,523 The validation. 208 00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,108 Yeah. 209 00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:36,154 But now I'll never get it. I mean, I've just been sitting and binging. 210 00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:39,449 Regionals is a week away. I would have to lose ten pounds. 211 00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:44,621 Well, fortunately for you, I know someone who's an expert at losing weight fast. 212 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:49,292 Yeah, wrestlers sometimes have to lose ten pounds in two days 213 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,878 to make their weight class, so I know all the tricks. 214 00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,755 This next week's about sweating and starving. 215 00:11:53,838 --> 00:11:57,008 Let's get some mileage in before the Ex-Lax kicks in, yeah? 216 00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:03,681 Speaking of shitty, 217 00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:07,560 I wanted to apologize for how I treated you. 218 00:12:07,644 --> 00:12:10,480 - It's fine. You don't have to. - I do. 219 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:13,358 You're being so helpful, and... 220 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,486 - I was kind of an asshole to you. - Oh, kind of? 221 00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:20,406 You know, you broke up with me, you didn't listen to me about Christian, 222 00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,824 you outed my dad. 223 00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:24,535 Okay. Definitely an asshole. 224 00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:29,249 Look, you told the truth about my dad, so you kind of did me a solid, 225 00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:31,626 and I've done some messed up things, you know? 226 00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:34,337 Cheated on Magnolia, slept with Regina. 227 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,340 Plus, I'm enjoying watching you suffer. 228 00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:40,343 So, come on. Let's pick up the pace. 229 00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:46,182 Hey, good morning. How'd you sleep? 230 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:49,269 - Not great. - Yeah, well, me neither. 231 00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,604 Bob didn't come home last night. 232 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:54,732 - He was probably out looking for Brick. - Yeah. 233 00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:57,026 Well, still, he could have called. 234 00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,237 Why didn't you sleep well? 235 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:01,823 First night at home in a new old bed? 236 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,826 No. I was thinking about Roxy. 237 00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:07,245 You were? What about her? 238 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:10,623 I feel bad that she's spent all this time with no father. 239 00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:14,002 I think you need to reach out. Clear the air. 240 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,421 We should go talk to her together. 241 00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:23,511 Well, thank God you're all right. I thought you were dead in a ditch. 242 00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:27,682 - Okay, weird. You sound like Mom. - Sorry, I was out driving around. 243 00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:30,101 All night? 244 00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:32,145 Coralee wants a divorce. 245 00:13:34,105 --> 00:13:36,357 I'll let you guys... talk. 246 00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:37,984 Yeah. Thank you, darling. 247 00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:39,110 Hey, come on, have a seat. 248 00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:41,571 What's going on? What happened? 249 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:44,240 It was... It was horrible. She's furious. 250 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,909 She thinks our whole marriage was a sham. 251 00:13:47,201 --> 00:13:49,495 Well... on the bright side, 252 00:13:49,579 --> 00:13:52,707 at least we can be together now without any guilt. 253 00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:54,334 Except, I don't want a divorce. 254 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:55,251 You... 255 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:00,173 So, what are you saying? 256 00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:01,549 You wanna get back with her? 257 00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:02,884 No, that's not what I'm saying. 258 00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:04,135 Really? Because honestly, Bob, 259 00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:06,346 it sounds like the opposite of moving forward. 260 00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:08,806 I just thought maybe there was a way that everything 261 00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:10,850 - could work out somehow. - You did, how? 262 00:14:11,392 --> 00:14:14,145 You think it's gonna be some kind of shared custody agreement? 263 00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:16,272 - A week with me, a week with her? - I don't know. 264 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,149 - No, you're in denial, Bob. - Of what? 265 00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:19,108 Of reality. 266 00:14:20,151 --> 00:14:20,985 You... 267 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:24,447 You need to start grieving the loss of your old life. 268 00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:30,536 Maybe I did need to grieve. 269 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,622 I did feel like a part of me had died... 270 00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:37,877 murdered by the hands of my former protégé, Patty Bladell. 271 00:14:38,503 --> 00:14:41,172 Brick and I had been doing two-a-days all week, 272 00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:42,757 and I was already feeling stronger. 273 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,675 Okay, stop. I gotta stop. Sorry, I need a break. 274 00:14:44,759 --> 00:14:46,177 Yeah, okay, here. Uh... 275 00:14:48,513 --> 00:14:50,890 - Drink this. - What's in it anyway? 276 00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:53,643 Uh, lime juice, cayenne pepper, maple syrup, raw egg, 277 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:54,811 - All-Bran... - Sorry I asked. 278 00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:00,525 Yeah. 279 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:05,571 Is that Christian's car? 280 00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:16,165 - Are you following me? - No, I just pulled over to send a text. 281 00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:18,376 You just happened to be on the street where I'm running. 282 00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:21,003 Or you just happened to be on the street where I'm parked. 283 00:15:21,379 --> 00:15:23,131 - Maybe it's fate. - I don't believe in fate. 284 00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,258 - What the hell's going on? - Christian's stalking me. 285 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:29,679 Whoa, easy, Vanilla Ice. 286 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,395 Get the hell out of here or I'm calling the cops! 287 00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:38,980 - The cops? You attacked me. - Yeah. 288 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,149 And it'll be a lot worse if you come near Patty again. 289 00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:45,111 So get in your car, drive away, and don't come back! 290 00:15:45,194 --> 00:15:47,405 Okay, okay. I'll go. 291 00:15:58,708 --> 00:16:00,877 - You okay? - Yeah. Yeah, now. 292 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,087 - We should call the cops. - No. No, no, no. 293 00:16:03,171 --> 00:16:05,047 I mean, he's right, you attacked him first. 294 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:06,966 Besides, I think he got the message. 295 00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:09,427 Your mom's out of town, so if he shows up again, call me. 296 00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:12,555 We got another mile, so, let's go. 297 00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:20,813 So, does this mean you're my real dad? 298 00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:22,940 Stella Rose said my real dad died. 299 00:16:23,024 --> 00:16:25,776 Well, she lied, because I asked her to. 300 00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:30,781 I was more worried about my image than telling the truth. 301 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:32,116 Why change your mind now? 302 00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:34,160 He's gay. 303 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:38,289 - I don't understand what that… - Look, I recently came out. 304 00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:43,127 And now, I'm trying to live a more honest and open life about everything. 305 00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:45,796 And I realize I did a lot of damage 306 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,633 when I was pretending to be someone I wasn't. 307 00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:51,928 And now I truly am trying to make amends, 308 00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:54,180 to both of my daughters. 309 00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,682 And I'd really love to get to know my sister. 310 00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:59,352 - So you're doing this for you. - What? No. 311 00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:03,439 No, we're doing this for us. For our family. 312 00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:07,443 You're not my family. I don't have a family. 313 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:09,403 I went from foster home to foster home, 314 00:17:09,487 --> 00:17:12,365 just trying to get by with no idea where I belonged. 315 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:14,742 You... You abandoned me. 316 00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,537 And this is the first time I've heard from you, 317 00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:21,123 so do me a favor, and let it be the last. 318 00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:32,468 Hey, what are you doing? 319 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,597 The movers picked up my stuff from Coralee's today. 320 00:17:36,681 --> 00:17:39,976 I, uh... I put most of it in storage, but there are a few boxes I... 321 00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:43,104 I wanted to go through. 322 00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:48,192 Look... 323 00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:51,153 If you wanna go back... 324 00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:52,697 I don't. 325 00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:56,033 I need to move forward, like you said. 326 00:17:57,243 --> 00:17:58,661 I just feel guilty. 327 00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:01,581 Brick was right, we broke up two families. 328 00:18:02,123 --> 00:18:03,624 You did the best you could... 329 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,502 to protect your family. We both did. 330 00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:10,506 I saw Roxy today. 331 00:18:11,716 --> 00:18:12,758 And how did that go? 332 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:15,803 Didn't go well. 333 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,809 Oh, look at us. We're supposed to be happy. 334 00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:23,603 Gay! 335 00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:27,023 Okay. 336 00:18:27,982 --> 00:18:28,858 Whoo! 337 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,693 We need to shake off this bad mood. 338 00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:34,113 I have an idea. 339 00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:46,917 I feel so much better. 340 00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:52,506 Whoo! Feels so good to finally introduce hashtag "BarnStrong" to the world. 341 00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:55,551 Lick it. 342 00:18:57,011 --> 00:18:58,220 You'll like it. 343 00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:02,808 Oh, um, I'm sorry. I'm... I'm... I'm with someone. 344 00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,523 I don't... I don't think this is my scene. 345 00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:13,986 Oh, come on, Bob, loosen up. Let your rainbow flag fly. 346 00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:15,071 Whoo! 347 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:17,281 I'm not sure those are my colors. 348 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:24,997 Guys, I'm... 349 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:28,209 This isn't... This is dry clean only! 350 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:32,463 Yeah, Daddy, take it off! 351 00:19:32,546 --> 00:19:34,256 Take it all off! 352 00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,300 That's not what... I mean... 353 00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,979 It was one place on one night. You can't judge it just by that. 354 00:19:49,063 --> 00:19:50,898 I told you, I am not like you. 355 00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:53,484 - Those aren't my people. - But I'm your people. 356 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:57,154 Look, there's plenty of other things we can do as a gay couple 357 00:19:57,238 --> 00:19:59,990 that don't involve go-go boys and strobe lights. 358 00:20:00,074 --> 00:20:02,743 Just... just stay open, hun. 359 00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:07,039 Might take some negotiation, but we can figure it out. 360 00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:11,544 What the fuck? 361 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,380 No, no, no. 362 00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:18,259 What if one of those big, beefy bear men followed us home 363 00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,803 to try and force us to devil taint them? 364 00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:22,054 A boy can dream. 365 00:20:26,934 --> 00:20:29,061 Oh, I'm sorry. I knocked over your garbage. 366 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:31,647 Roxy, what are you doing here? 367 00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:34,316 I confronted Stella Rose. I asked her about why she lied. 368 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:35,401 Come on, come in. 369 00:20:38,028 --> 00:20:40,114 She told me that you paid her off to keep her quiet. 370 00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:43,492 She could've used that money to take care of me, so why give me up for adoption? 371 00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:46,579 Like, what kind of person does something like that? 372 00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:48,205 All right. Hey, come here. 373 00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:50,541 I was so hurt, I just started driving. 374 00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:57,673 Do you like peach or lemon zinger tea? 375 00:21:00,968 --> 00:21:05,139 I was actually starting to think I could win regionals without Bob. 376 00:21:05,222 --> 00:21:09,018 I was feeling strong, independent, fearless. 377 00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:13,606 So much for fearless. 378 00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:16,734 Oh, my God! 379 00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:22,740 Thanks again for giving up your room. 380 00:21:23,157 --> 00:21:25,159 - I feel safer already. - Yeah, I... 381 00:21:25,659 --> 00:21:27,244 I was glad you called. I mean, clearly, 382 00:21:27,578 --> 00:21:30,956 Christian did not get the message, so... take this. 383 00:21:31,373 --> 00:21:33,793 My mom got it after she took a self-defense class, and… 384 00:21:35,252 --> 00:21:37,713 Yeah, one zap of this would knock his ass out for 30 minutes. 385 00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:40,174 Thank you. I will sleep with it under my pillow. 386 00:21:40,257 --> 00:21:42,676 Uh, just don't accidentally zap yourself. 387 00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:45,304 Or me. I did it once, it wasn't pretty, so... 388 00:21:45,387 --> 00:21:47,181 Uh, there's extra towels in the bathroom, 389 00:21:47,264 --> 00:21:49,725 and me and my mom will both be downstairs if you need us, 390 00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:51,352 so just call. 391 00:21:53,229 --> 00:21:54,313 Brick, wait. 392 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:58,234 Could you, like, maybe stay the night with me? 393 00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,693 Just as a friend. 394 00:21:59,777 --> 00:22:01,946 I'm just... I'm still feeling kind of spooked. 395 00:22:02,404 --> 00:22:03,989 Yeah. Whatever you need. 396 00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:09,662 Thanks. 397 00:22:20,047 --> 00:22:22,132 Actually, there is one more thing I need. 398 00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:28,389 Would you possibly want to... 399 00:22:29,014 --> 00:22:31,767 go to a Drew Barrymore book signing with me tomorrow night? 400 00:22:32,226 --> 00:22:34,895 I just... I've admired her forever. 401 00:22:35,729 --> 00:22:37,606 It's gonna be like a big deal for me, 402 00:22:37,690 --> 00:22:40,484 and... I would love it if you could be there. 403 00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:41,485 I mean, if you're free. 404 00:22:42,695 --> 00:22:44,321 Sure. It's a date. 405 00:22:45,573 --> 00:22:47,741 I was finally feeling lighter, 406 00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:51,245 and it wasn't just because I got back down to my fighting weight. 407 00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:53,956 I had made things right with Brick and Coralee. 408 00:22:54,498 --> 00:22:57,835 But there was still one Armstrong to whom I owed an apology. 409 00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:06,594 Okay. I got towels in the guest bathroom, 410 00:23:06,677 --> 00:23:08,262 fresh sheets on the bed. 411 00:23:09,013 --> 00:23:10,973 Is there anything else you need? 412 00:23:11,849 --> 00:23:14,184 Not unless you can pay off the regionals board too. 413 00:23:14,268 --> 00:23:15,603 Pay 'em off? What do you mean? 414 00:23:15,686 --> 00:23:17,396 Look at me, I'm a mess. 415 00:23:17,605 --> 00:23:19,815 There's no way I can win without Stella Rose coaching me. 416 00:23:19,899 --> 00:23:22,568 I don't know how to talk, I don't know how to dress. 417 00:23:22,735 --> 00:23:25,279 Stella Rose had me doing all that rodeo crap and… 418 00:23:25,696 --> 00:23:26,906 We can help you. 419 00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:30,367 - Really? - Wait, we? 420 00:23:30,451 --> 00:23:34,371 I was thinking we could coach Roxy together. 421 00:23:36,123 --> 00:23:38,167 No strobe lights, no go-go boys. 422 00:23:39,126 --> 00:23:39,960 What do you think? 423 00:23:47,384 --> 00:23:51,388 It had felt good to have Brick protecting me from my psycho ex-boyfriend, 424 00:23:51,639 --> 00:23:54,308 but now, I had to be brave on my own. 425 00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:01,982 Hi, Bob. 426 00:24:03,108 --> 00:24:05,986 - Get out... or I'll call security. - No, wait. 427 00:24:06,070 --> 00:24:08,322 Wait, wait, wait. Can we...? Can we talk? 428 00:24:09,615 --> 00:24:10,574 About what? 429 00:24:11,742 --> 00:24:13,994 About you ruining my reputation? Hmm? 430 00:24:14,328 --> 00:24:17,414 About you destroying my family? 431 00:24:17,790 --> 00:24:22,336 Or about you robbing me of any choice I had 432 00:24:22,419 --> 00:24:24,380 in a very confusing, 433 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:28,717 very complicated, very personal matter?! 434 00:24:30,928 --> 00:24:32,680 I'm... I'm... I'm sorry. 435 00:24:35,432 --> 00:24:37,768 You know what? It's fine. 436 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:39,687 You've freed me 437 00:24:40,187 --> 00:24:44,274 to work with a real beauty queen, who's a winner. 438 00:24:46,276 --> 00:24:47,111 Wha...? 439 00:24:48,445 --> 00:24:49,321 What do you mean? 440 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:51,657 I'm coaching Roxy. 441 00:24:56,495 --> 00:24:57,454 Now leave. 442 00:25:02,292 --> 00:25:04,003 Maybe it was crazy to think 443 00:25:04,086 --> 00:25:07,923 that after everything I had done, Bob would just forgive me. 444 00:25:08,507 --> 00:25:12,678 But from the moment I met him, I just knew we were connected. 445 00:25:13,679 --> 00:25:15,514 I couldn't believe it was over. 446 00:25:16,098 --> 00:25:18,142 This wasn't how it was supposed to end. 447 00:25:20,644 --> 00:25:21,520 There you go. 448 00:25:22,271 --> 00:25:23,230 Oh, babe! 449 00:25:23,731 --> 00:25:27,943 Roxy and I came up with the most genius idea. 450 00:25:28,027 --> 00:25:32,448 What do you think about Roxy as the face of CACA? 451 00:25:35,701 --> 00:25:38,037 Your charity. The Center for Anal Cancer Awareness. 452 00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:40,164 She needs a new platform. 453 00:25:41,874 --> 00:25:45,085 Hello, Bob, what is wrong with you? This is a fantastic idea. 454 00:25:45,169 --> 00:25:47,046 Patty came to see me at the office. 455 00:25:47,755 --> 00:25:50,049 - Uh-oh. Well, how'd that go? - Not well. 456 00:25:50,340 --> 00:25:53,719 I said some horrible things, things I knew would hurt her. 457 00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:55,721 - Understandable. - No, I don't know. 458 00:25:56,555 --> 00:25:58,265 Doesn't that make me just as bad as her? 459 00:25:58,348 --> 00:26:02,102 If I could just snap and lash out like that, 460 00:26:02,186 --> 00:26:03,896 then maybe I could understand why she… 461 00:26:03,979 --> 00:26:06,273 Hang on. You're not thinking about forgiving her, are you? 462 00:26:06,356 --> 00:26:07,191 No. 463 00:26:10,527 --> 00:26:11,737 I don't know. We just... 464 00:26:12,946 --> 00:26:14,156 went through a lot together. 465 00:26:14,239 --> 00:26:17,493 So did Hitler and Mussolini, and look how that turned out. 466 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:19,745 Forget about Patty, 467 00:26:20,120 --> 00:26:21,538 focus on Roxy. 468 00:26:25,125 --> 00:26:26,960 Maybe Bob was right. 469 00:26:27,461 --> 00:26:30,547 Maybe I had to mourn the loss of my relationship with Patty too. 470 00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:36,845 I couldn't believe Bob had replaced me so quickly. 471 00:26:37,096 --> 00:26:39,389 And with Roxy? My biggest rival? 472 00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:43,685 She was already the perfect pageant girl, and now she had the perfect coach. 473 00:26:44,019 --> 00:26:45,521 I'd never win regionals now. 474 00:26:45,771 --> 00:26:46,605 Patty? 475 00:26:47,397 --> 00:26:48,982 What are you doing here? 476 00:26:49,316 --> 00:26:52,444 I'm staying here while my mom is out of town. 477 00:26:52,528 --> 00:26:54,196 What the hell are you doing here? 478 00:26:54,947 --> 00:26:56,323 Waiting for Coralee. 479 00:26:56,949 --> 00:26:59,368 I came up with an amazing business plan for Tampazzle, 480 00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:02,663 but she won't take my calls, so I used the key under the mat. 481 00:27:02,746 --> 00:27:04,164 That's breaking and entering. 482 00:27:04,248 --> 00:27:06,959 No, it's determination. 483 00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:11,421 I want in on this tampon action, and I won't take no for an answer. 484 00:27:11,964 --> 00:27:14,591 You're insane. Coralee will never go for it. 485 00:27:14,675 --> 00:27:17,803 - You seduced Brick. You accused Bob… - Hey, hey, hey. 486 00:27:18,262 --> 00:27:19,805 We all know what I did, 487 00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:22,391 and I paid dearly for my sins. 488 00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:23,809 But I wanna make it up to Coralee, 489 00:27:23,892 --> 00:27:25,519 and the best way to do that is to help her. 490 00:27:25,602 --> 00:27:27,771 I have contacts, I can find investors, 491 00:27:28,188 --> 00:27:30,149 pull some strings, so to speak. 492 00:27:30,524 --> 00:27:33,152 - Ew. - Plus, I have a ton of great ideas. 493 00:27:33,235 --> 00:27:35,320 Yeah, you're a real font of inspiration. 494 00:27:35,404 --> 00:27:38,073 Was it your idea to have Dixie fake being in a wheelchair? 495 00:27:39,491 --> 00:27:40,993 Yes! Ergh! 496 00:27:41,076 --> 00:27:43,787 And it would have worked too, if Dixie had a higher pain threshold. 497 00:27:44,329 --> 00:27:48,417 We would have ruined your reputation and had the greatest comeback story ever. 498 00:27:48,792 --> 00:27:52,462 Oh, adopted pageant girl miraculously learns to walk again. 499 00:27:53,046 --> 00:27:54,673 Do you even know where she is? Do you care? 500 00:27:54,756 --> 00:27:55,966 Of course I care! 501 00:27:56,258 --> 00:27:59,636 But she drove away with my house, and now she won't return my calls, 502 00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,014 so I'm looking out for number one. 503 00:28:02,389 --> 00:28:03,265 Me. 504 00:28:03,348 --> 00:28:06,268 You mean by lying, or hurting anyone who gets in your way? 505 00:28:06,643 --> 00:28:09,855 Don't you get on your high horse with me, Patty Bladell. 506 00:28:10,439 --> 00:28:11,982 You blew up Bob's life. 507 00:28:13,025 --> 00:28:15,903 Oh, you done some terrible things to get what you want. 508 00:28:16,862 --> 00:28:22,326 Seems to me like every time you try to do the right thing, 509 00:28:22,868 --> 00:28:25,162 it bites you in the ass. 510 00:28:26,663 --> 00:28:27,706 Face it, Patty. 511 00:28:28,165 --> 00:28:30,792 Integrity is for pussies. 512 00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:35,923 That's why I gave it up a long time ago. Winners win. Period. 513 00:28:36,006 --> 00:28:37,799 Oh. 514 00:28:37,883 --> 00:28:39,134 Oh, my God, write that down. 515 00:28:39,218 --> 00:28:40,928 Oh, that is a great slogan! 516 00:28:41,303 --> 00:28:44,348 Regina... get out of the house, or I'll call the cops. 517 00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,643 Fine. But leave this for Coralee. It's my business plan. 518 00:28:48,227 --> 00:28:49,394 Whatever, sure. 519 00:28:49,478 --> 00:28:53,315 Oh, oh, tell her I tried out her prototype and it works great. You wanna see? 520 00:28:53,398 --> 00:28:55,150 - Regina, no. Out. - A little peak? 521 00:28:55,234 --> 00:28:56,818 - Now. - I showed you! 522 00:28:56,902 --> 00:28:58,278 Can't unsee that. 523 00:28:58,654 --> 00:28:59,696 Bye, Felicia. 524 00:29:00,864 --> 00:29:04,409 Regina was crazy, but could she also be right? 525 00:29:04,910 --> 00:29:06,995 Maybe integrity was for pussies. 526 00:29:07,329 --> 00:29:09,831 I had done the right thing, like Drew would do, 527 00:29:09,915 --> 00:29:11,583 and it had bit me in the ass. 528 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:15,045 Nonnie rejected me, Bob pushed me away. 529 00:29:15,420 --> 00:29:18,423 All I had left was regionals, and I needed to win. 530 00:29:19,132 --> 00:29:21,843 So, what would Regina Sinclair do? 531 00:29:29,893 --> 00:29:32,562 She'd take Roxy out. 532 00:29:34,022 --> 00:29:37,109 I couldn't kill her, of course, that would be crazy. 533 00:29:37,901 --> 00:29:42,155 But if Roxy was the only thing standing in my way of winning regionals, 534 00:29:42,239 --> 00:29:44,366 I had to make sure she didn't show up. 535 00:29:46,326 --> 00:29:48,787 Maybe I was light-headed from not eating in days, 536 00:29:48,870 --> 00:29:51,248 or delirious from the sweating and laxatives, 537 00:29:51,331 --> 00:29:54,126 but my plan felt divinely inspired. 538 00:29:54,751 --> 00:29:58,922 I would just borrow the Ween-Mobile, follow Roxy until she was alone, 539 00:29:59,006 --> 00:30:02,134 lure her into the truck, drive her into the outskirts of town, 540 00:30:02,217 --> 00:30:04,136 and leave her there until regionals were over. 541 00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:07,639 And then I'd just let her go. 542 00:30:08,265 --> 00:30:09,558 No harm, no foul. 543 00:30:10,851 --> 00:30:13,562 I just had to figure out a way to disguise myself 544 00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:15,981 so Roxy couldn't finger me once I set her free. 545 00:30:28,702 --> 00:30:30,871 This is impressive work, Coralee. 546 00:30:31,413 --> 00:30:33,707 I had no idea you had such a mind for business. 547 00:30:33,790 --> 00:30:36,960 Well, my daddy ran his own business, as you know, 548 00:30:37,044 --> 00:30:39,504 so I guess I just picked up a thing or two. 549 00:30:39,796 --> 00:30:43,467 And this Tampazzle idea... you came up with it yourself? 550 00:30:43,759 --> 00:30:45,052 Oh, absolutely. 551 00:30:45,469 --> 00:30:47,637 I realized there was a hole in the marketplace, 552 00:30:47,721 --> 00:30:49,389 and I had the perfect way to plug it. 553 00:30:54,227 --> 00:30:57,230 They come in different sizes depending on how big… 554 00:30:57,314 --> 00:30:59,941 Oh, there's really no need to go through all that. 555 00:31:00,025 --> 00:31:00,859 Oh, okay. 556 00:31:00,942 --> 00:31:04,029 Besides, I'm more interested in helping you make a name for yourself, 557 00:31:04,446 --> 00:31:05,489 without Bob. 558 00:31:06,990 --> 00:31:08,700 You're not the only one he humiliated. 559 00:31:09,409 --> 00:31:13,622 I've spent a lot of time dealing with comments from clients about... 560 00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,124 my son, the pansy. 561 00:31:16,875 --> 00:31:17,876 But this... 562 00:31:19,086 --> 00:31:20,879 this is a whole 'nother level. 563 00:31:21,338 --> 00:31:25,008 Not to mention the fact that I signed the company over to Bob Barnard, 564 00:31:25,717 --> 00:31:28,387 only to find out that he's a fudge-packing flame-thrower too. 565 00:31:28,762 --> 00:31:29,805 Okay, you know what? 566 00:31:29,888 --> 00:31:32,182 There's no reason for homophobic language. 567 00:31:32,265 --> 00:31:34,226 You're defending him, after what he did to you? 568 00:31:34,309 --> 00:31:35,727 Well, no. I just... 569 00:31:35,811 --> 00:31:38,605 I'm not comfortable with those kinds of slurs. 570 00:31:38,688 --> 00:31:40,399 You'd better cut that liberal snowflake talk 571 00:31:40,482 --> 00:31:42,818 before I set you up on meetings with investors. 572 00:31:43,110 --> 00:31:44,528 You know my client list. 573 00:31:44,611 --> 00:31:46,571 Big Tobacco, Big Oil, 574 00:31:46,822 --> 00:31:49,366 - the NRA, the KKK. - The KKK? 575 00:31:49,449 --> 00:31:51,910 That's who you want to invest in Tampazzle? 576 00:31:51,993 --> 00:31:53,703 They love tampons. 577 00:31:54,121 --> 00:31:56,039 They're white. 578 00:31:56,123 --> 00:31:59,543 Besides, they've been looking for a way to tap into the female market 579 00:31:59,626 --> 00:32:01,086 to rehabilitate their image. 580 00:32:01,461 --> 00:32:03,004 Uh, yeah, but it feels like 581 00:32:03,088 --> 00:32:06,591 then I would be supporting their cause by proxy. 582 00:32:06,925 --> 00:32:08,468 It feels like blood money. 583 00:32:08,552 --> 00:32:10,220 Apropos, don't you think? 584 00:32:11,555 --> 00:32:14,891 Uh, it's still one step too far. 585 00:32:14,975 --> 00:32:17,227 Well, suit yourself. 586 00:32:18,228 --> 00:32:20,397 But I do hope you've got a good divorce attorney, 587 00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:22,858 because the only other way you're gonna get that seed money 588 00:32:22,941 --> 00:32:26,611 is to take that brownie-banging son of mine for everything he's worth. 589 00:32:30,699 --> 00:32:31,950 Here we go. 590 00:32:37,038 --> 00:32:38,957 My dad is coming out of retirement 591 00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,042 to represent Coralee in the divorce. 592 00:32:41,126 --> 00:32:42,502 Oh. 593 00:32:43,587 --> 00:32:44,629 I'm sorry. 594 00:32:44,713 --> 00:32:47,257 I was married to her for 20 years. 595 00:32:47,340 --> 00:32:50,594 I'm the father of her children, and this is how she's treating me. 596 00:32:50,719 --> 00:32:52,971 - Well, she's hurting. - Yeah, so am I. 597 00:32:54,014 --> 00:32:55,390 It's like a part of me died. 598 00:32:55,474 --> 00:32:56,475 'Cause it did. 599 00:32:57,976 --> 00:32:59,102 You've been grieving. 600 00:32:59,769 --> 00:33:00,770 Look, hey. 601 00:33:02,147 --> 00:33:03,398 You've been through denial... 602 00:33:04,441 --> 00:33:06,985 you're going through anger, you're depressed. 603 00:33:07,903 --> 00:33:09,488 This is good. 604 00:33:11,490 --> 00:33:12,449 How do you figure? 605 00:33:12,532 --> 00:33:14,910 Because, honey, what's next is hope. 606 00:33:17,621 --> 00:33:18,997 Forgive me if I'm not convinced. 607 00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:21,166 I'm going to the office to do some work, 608 00:33:21,791 --> 00:33:23,084 clear my head. 609 00:33:40,143 --> 00:33:41,061 Oh, God. 610 00:33:41,978 --> 00:33:43,021 Whoo! 611 00:33:44,397 --> 00:33:47,734 Oh! Bed, bed, bed, bed, bed, bed, bed, bed! 612 00:34:08,838 --> 00:34:09,923 Ooh! 613 00:34:10,340 --> 00:34:11,675 Something for Patty. 614 00:34:12,259 --> 00:34:13,343 Okay. 615 00:34:14,511 --> 00:34:16,096 "Dear Patty. 616 00:34:16,429 --> 00:34:17,430 I love you. 617 00:34:17,847 --> 00:34:20,058 I see the real you, 618 00:34:20,141 --> 00:34:22,352 and I'm never letting you go. 619 00:34:23,478 --> 00:34:24,729 Love, Christian." 620 00:34:24,813 --> 00:34:29,192 Okay, well, wordsmith you ain't, young Christian. 621 00:34:29,943 --> 00:34:30,944 Let's see. 622 00:34:31,570 --> 00:34:32,487 Okay. 623 00:34:35,031 --> 00:34:37,033 WWDBD? 624 00:34:39,578 --> 00:34:40,412 Well... 625 00:34:47,377 --> 00:34:49,588 Coralee, what...? What are you doing here? 626 00:34:49,671 --> 00:34:52,507 I got a text message that there was an emergency. 627 00:34:53,049 --> 00:34:55,093 - I didn't send it. - I did. 628 00:34:56,386 --> 00:34:59,347 You left your phone while I was doing the dishes. 629 00:35:03,351 --> 00:35:06,313 Well, aren't you two just a picture of domestic bliss. 630 00:35:06,396 --> 00:35:09,274 - We need a mediation. - Then you should have called my attorney. 631 00:35:09,357 --> 00:35:12,235 I don't mean a legal mediation, I mean a personal one. 632 00:35:13,528 --> 00:35:16,948 There has to be a way to figure this out, find a way to be happy. 633 00:35:17,032 --> 00:35:18,992 Well, that is easy for you to say. 634 00:35:19,075 --> 00:35:20,952 You guys end up with everything, 635 00:35:21,286 --> 00:35:23,622 and I... I get nothing. 636 00:35:23,997 --> 00:35:25,999 I literally get nothing. 637 00:35:27,542 --> 00:35:31,379 Okay, Bob, your name is on the house, it is on the car, 638 00:35:31,463 --> 00:35:32,839 it is on the bank accounts. 639 00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:37,594 I can't even pick up my theater tickets without you being there at will call. 640 00:35:38,428 --> 00:35:39,888 So, you can have it all. 641 00:35:41,556 --> 00:35:43,642 - What? - Just take it. 642 00:35:44,809 --> 00:35:45,977 The house, the money, 643 00:35:46,686 --> 00:35:47,604 whatever you want. 644 00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:52,275 I want you, Bob. 645 00:35:52,734 --> 00:35:53,818 That's what I want. 646 00:35:54,486 --> 00:35:58,782 None of this means anything if you are not by my side. 647 00:36:02,077 --> 00:36:02,952 Coralee. 648 00:36:04,371 --> 00:36:06,164 I miss my husband. 649 00:36:12,504 --> 00:36:14,839 I miss my wife so much. 650 00:36:19,177 --> 00:36:20,428 I'm sorry, I should... 651 00:36:21,513 --> 00:36:22,347 I shouldn't be here. 652 00:36:23,807 --> 00:36:24,891 Bob. Bob, wait. 653 00:36:30,021 --> 00:36:31,398 I love you too. 654 00:36:34,025 --> 00:36:34,859 What? 655 00:36:36,069 --> 00:36:37,946 - Both of you. - Bullshit! 656 00:36:38,029 --> 00:36:41,241 Look, can't you just consider the possibility 657 00:36:41,324 --> 00:36:44,703 that I can feel this for more than one person? 658 00:36:45,870 --> 00:36:48,832 It's okay. It's okay. I'm gonna make it easy on you. 659 00:36:50,583 --> 00:36:51,543 I started this... 660 00:36:53,878 --> 00:36:54,963 and I'm gonna end it. 661 00:37:12,605 --> 00:37:14,691 I'm sorry. I didn't mean to… 662 00:37:16,443 --> 00:37:17,277 No. 663 00:37:18,820 --> 00:37:19,738 It's okay. 664 00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:23,324 It's okay? What's okay? 665 00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:25,118 This. 666 00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:28,496 I thought I'd be jealous. 667 00:37:29,497 --> 00:37:31,332 You mean you're not? 668 00:37:33,126 --> 00:37:34,127 No, I am. 669 00:37:35,545 --> 00:37:36,463 Just not... 670 00:37:37,422 --> 00:37:38,882 not the way you think. 671 00:38:01,946 --> 00:38:03,823 I've wanted to do that for years. 672 00:38:05,241 --> 00:38:06,075 Me too. 673 00:38:08,620 --> 00:38:09,454 Well, then... 674 00:38:11,039 --> 00:38:13,917 maybe more is possible... 675 00:38:15,710 --> 00:38:16,586 than I thought. 676 00:38:32,352 --> 00:38:34,479 This was either the best idea 677 00:38:34,562 --> 00:38:36,523 or the worst idea of my life. 678 00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:41,152 This was either the best idea or the worst idea of my life. 679 00:38:41,569 --> 00:38:43,530 I had followed Roxy all night. 680 00:38:43,738 --> 00:38:46,741 From the Barnards, to the tailor, to the gym. 681 00:38:47,492 --> 00:38:51,579 And I figured this close to regionals, she'd be sweating it out till close. 682 00:38:58,920 --> 00:38:59,921 Brick. 683 00:39:00,255 --> 00:39:01,089 What's up? 684 00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:04,717 Patty, where are you? The line for Drew Barrymore is huge, 685 00:39:05,385 --> 00:39:06,886 and they're saying I can't save seats. 686 00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:09,848 Shit, I completely forgot. 687 00:39:10,557 --> 00:39:13,101 - She's saying she forgot. - Who are you talking to? 688 00:39:13,184 --> 00:39:14,853 - Nonnie, she's here too. - Give me the phone. 689 00:39:16,271 --> 00:39:18,523 What do you mean you forgot? It's Drew Barrymore. 690 00:39:19,107 --> 00:39:20,233 I thought you were over her. 691 00:39:21,150 --> 00:39:21,985 I lied. 692 00:39:22,819 --> 00:39:26,239 I couldn't stop thinking about it after we talked, or you. 693 00:39:27,448 --> 00:39:31,911 I'm sorry for what I said. Can our break be over now? 694 00:39:32,412 --> 00:39:33,621 Totally. Save me a seat. 695 00:39:38,376 --> 00:39:42,338 I wanted to meet Drew, but I wanted to win regionals more. 696 00:39:49,012 --> 00:39:49,846 Hola. 697 00:39:56,436 --> 00:39:57,353 Ah. 698 00:39:58,104 --> 00:39:59,105 Wh? 699 00:40:00,690 --> 00:40:02,317 What the f...?