1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 2 00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:09,676 Oh, yeah. 3 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:11,929 Oh, yeah... 4 00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:14,306 Abra-cum-dabra! 5 00:00:14,389 --> 00:00:16,308 Ha! Ta-da! 6 00:00:16,391 --> 00:00:19,520 - Whoo! That was amazing. - So good. 7 00:00:19,603 --> 00:00:21,063 Yeah. I really unloaded in you. 8 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:24,191 - I love you, too. - All right! 9 00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,109 I'm gonna go wash my dick off before school. 10 00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:27,986 Wait, Jay, can I talk to you about something? 11 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:29,927 Ugh. Okay, listen, for the last time 12 00:00:29,928 --> 00:00:32,366 I am not gonna take you apple picking. 13 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:36,161 No, it's not that. I don't know how to say this, but... 14 00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:38,664 - I'm late. - Late? You're a pillow. 15 00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:41,416 - You have nowhere to go. - No, Jay. I'm pregnant. 16 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,252 What?! 17 00:00:43,335 --> 00:00:46,004 Nice. I mean, how would that even be possible? 18 00:00:46,088 --> 00:00:48,882 Come on, don't be naive, Jay. I told you to use protection. 19 00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:51,468 What? No, I thought you meant from stains! 20 00:00:51,551 --> 00:00:54,304 - I'm not ready to have a baby! - Well, you better get ready. 21 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,306 Oh, man! Oh, man! This is... 22 00:00:56,390 --> 00:01:00,227 Boys, wash your dicks and get ready for school! 23 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:02,104 - Okay, Mom! - Already on it, Ma! 24 00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:03,480 Shit, I'm late to wash my dick. 25 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,855 Wow, that was not good. 26 00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:47,357 My whole thing is like, he's bad at clarinet. 27 00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:50,319 - True, but nobody else auditioned. - He's wearing a hat. 28 00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:51,695 I also like his hat. 29 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:53,572 He reminds me of a young Woody Allen 30 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,782 playing a surprise gig at the Carlyle Hotel. 31 00:01:55,866 --> 00:01:57,367 Woody Allen. Ho-ho. 32 00:01:57,451 --> 00:02:00,037 That guy is 85 pounds of pure sex. 33 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,331 Woody Allen was accused of molestation. 34 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:05,125 He says he didn't do it, but he did marry his stepdaughter. 35 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,753 It is both very complicated and very simple. 36 00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:10,130 - I say we let Andrew in. - God help us. 37 00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:12,257 Andrew, welcome to Jazz Club. 38 00:02:12,341 --> 00:02:15,052 And on a personal note, I like your fedora. 39 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:18,555 It evokes jazz's colorful past and funky future. 40 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:21,308 That was the exact vibe I was trying to summon. 41 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:24,561 Good banter. Now tell her you want to wear her ass as a hat. 42 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:27,272 - Really? Should I? - No, no, don't do that. 43 00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:29,441 I'm off my game. The Woody Allen stuff really threw me. 44 00:02:29,524 --> 00:02:33,362 That guy's a hero. Not artistically, just personally speaking. 45 00:02:34,363 --> 00:02:36,740 Remember that girl from camp I told you about, Roland? 46 00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:40,160 Oh, yeah, Roland. I was picturing an older man named Roland. 47 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:42,537 Right. No, I didn't kiss an older man at camp. 48 00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:45,165 - The heart wants what it wants. - Anyway, she texted me last night. 49 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,708 Quote, "Come into the city tomorrow. 50 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:49,419 - We should hang out and whatevs." - Ooh! 51 00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:52,089 - Do you know what "whatevs" means? - Short for whatever. 52 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:55,675 No, I think "whatevs" implies that she wants to make out. 53 00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:57,552 Making out with a city girl. Wow. 54 00:02:57,636 --> 00:02:59,679 Andrew, we are going to New York. 55 00:02:59,763 --> 00:03:03,225 Me? Or, I'm sorry, is there a fun person behind me? 56 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:05,185 Like a dumb idiot, wears a fun shirt? 57 00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:06,978 No, you. You're fun. 58 00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:09,398 Oh, no, Nick. No, no, thank you, but I am not fun. 59 00:03:09,481 --> 00:03:11,608 - I have many virtues. I'm loyal. - Uh-huh. 60 00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:13,860 - I have a huge puffy winter coat... - The biggest. 61 00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:16,238 But fun? No. I think you should go by yourself. 62 00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:18,031 But I want to go with my best friend. 63 00:03:18,115 --> 00:03:20,450 And Andrew, I didn't want to play the jazz card, 64 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:21,701 but what about jazz? 65 00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:26,373 Andrew, jazz is about taking risks. It's the only way you get better. 66 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:28,125 - At jazz? - At life! 67 00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,960 Jazz is like life. 68 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,878 It goes on for longer than you think, 69 00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:35,006 and then as soon as you're like, "I get it," it ends. 70 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:36,341 Oh. 71 00:03:36,425 --> 00:03:41,555 ♪ And the next thing you know ♪ ♪ You're a ghost in a backpack ♪ 72 00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,015 Did someone mention necrophil... Oh, hey, Duke. 73 00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:45,225 Hey, Maurice. 74 00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:49,563 You got that seven dollars you owe me? 75 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,273 I, uh... 76 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:54,526 Andrew, you gotta listen to the Duke. There's literally hundreds 77 00:03:54,609 --> 00:03:57,988 of blonde Puerto Rican women in New York City. Yum, yum. 78 00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:00,157 - Come on, Andrew, adventure! - Jazz! 79 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,451 Puerto Rican blondes with large hoop earrings 80 00:04:02,534 --> 00:04:04,411 that you can stick your dick through. 81 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:06,580 Excuse me, has anyone thought about our parents? 82 00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:08,248 You know, they can track our cell phones. 83 00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:09,958 That's why we're giving our phones to Jessi. 84 00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:13,879 Hey, Jessi, what if you went with Nick and I stayed safe and fine? 85 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:16,256 I've got bat mitzvah stuff all afternoon. 86 00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:18,341 But I do think this is good for you, Andrew. 87 00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:20,719 - I am so scared. - Well, embrace it, girl. 88 00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:22,471 - I'm a boy. - Get out of your comfort zone. 89 00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:24,765 Yeah, conquer your fears and do what I want. 90 00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:26,224 How do we even get out of class? 91 00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:29,728 Well, these notes from your parents were obviously forged... 92 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:30,937 Oh, my God. 93 00:04:31,021 --> 00:04:33,106 ... in the fires of good parenting. 94 00:04:33,190 --> 00:04:35,859 - Yeah. - Your folks understand the value 95 00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:38,028 of an unsupervised field trip to Manhattan, 96 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:41,406 which doesn't sound suspicious to me at all. 97 00:04:41,490 --> 00:04:43,784 I feel guilty exploiting this man. 98 00:04:43,867 --> 00:04:46,787 I think he's really genuinely happy to have any human contact. 99 00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:49,289 You know, I'll actually be in the city myself later. 100 00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:52,167 Maybe we should... I don't know, hang out. 101 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,085 - You want to hang out with us? - In Manhattan? 102 00:04:54,169 --> 00:04:56,505 No, no, deep Queens. 103 00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:58,590 I'll be at the Patrick Ewing Brewing Company. 104 00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:01,468 - Uh... - Casual dining, ambience up the wazoo. 105 00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:03,220 Okay. Well, maybe. 106 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:07,599 Great! Possible hang sitch? Cool, all right. 107 00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:10,435 How do you guys hold a pen? Like a fork, right? 108 00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:13,772 All right, Nick, let's go to New York! 109 00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:17,734 - That hat is hilarious! - It's my jazz hat. 110 00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:20,445 Oh, boy, you're sincerely wearing that hat. 111 00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:23,573 I bought it with the money from when my grandfather died. 112 00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:27,702 - Oh, no. How much money? - $199. 113 00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:32,207 Ah, yes, a fair price for a marvelous hat. 114 00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:36,503 - Morning sickness, huh? - Yeah. 115 00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:39,089 - Thanks for staying home. - Of course, of course. 116 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:42,801 So, have you thought about what you wanna do? 117 00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:45,428 - About what? - You know, like, pregnancy-wise. 118 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:48,223 - Are you suggesting... ? - No, not at all. 119 00:05:48,306 --> 00:05:49,849 - Unless you wanna... - I'm keeping it. 120 00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:51,977 Of course! I'm keeping it, too, 121 00:05:51,978 --> 00:05:53,478 'cause that's what we're doing, keeping it. 122 00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:55,897 This might be my only chance to have a baby. 123 00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:58,024 - I mean, I am 40. - What?! 124 00:05:58,108 --> 00:06:00,610 - I'm from your grandparents' house. - Holy shit! 125 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:03,780 - What's the big deal? - Wait, how old do you think I am? 126 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:06,074 - You're 40, right? - Why would you think that?! 127 00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:09,202 Ohh, I'm fuckin' 40. Ooh! 128 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,496 I'm a famous 40-year-old magician. 129 00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:15,208 I drive a bright red Tesla I bought with all my 40-year-old money. 130 00:06:15,292 --> 00:06:18,211 Yeah, I'm also 40. I know your grandparents. 131 00:06:18,295 --> 00:06:20,880 Shut up, shut up, shut up! I'm 40! 132 00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:23,300 - So, wait, how old are you? - I'm 13. 133 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:25,802 What?! You're too young to be a dad. 134 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:29,556 I know! That's why I secretly want you to get rid of it! 135 00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,525 Well, this is Roland's building. 136 00:06:40,609 --> 00:06:42,152 Glad you got here safe. 137 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,904 I'm gonna go possess people on the street. 138 00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:46,573 You tell PriceWaterhouse I will... 139 00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:49,492 Goodbye, businessman. 140 00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:52,078 ♪ See you tomorrow at ♪ ♪ White People Work ♪ 141 00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:56,666 Are you nervous to hang out with Roland? 142 00:06:56,750 --> 00:07:00,337 - What? Why would I be nervous? - She's a city kid. They're so cool. 143 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,213 I mean, remember on Gilmore Girls... 144 00:07:02,297 --> 00:07:04,716 Also, before we go in there, you know me. 145 00:07:04,799 --> 00:07:06,718 I'm on record as loving the hat. 146 00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:09,638 I'm wondering if Roland will like it. Does that make sense? 147 00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:12,390 - Is my tone reading? - Nicholas, Nicholas, Nicholas. 148 00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:15,602 - This is the city where jazz flourished. - Uh-huh. 149 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:18,855 - I am wearing a jazz hat. - Right, but... 150 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:22,108 - I look like a jazz musician. - Uh, sure. 151 00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,235 - I'm not gonna embarrass you. - Oh, good. 152 00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:26,321 - Do you think they'll have Ezekiel bread? - What? 153 00:07:26,404 --> 00:07:28,949 Ezekiel bread. It's an ancient grain bread. 154 00:07:29,032 --> 00:07:33,536 I'd like to eat some soon so I can take my vitamin for dandruff. 155 00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:34,746 I'll explain it all to Roland. 156 00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:38,124 Hello? Roland? 157 00:07:38,208 --> 00:07:39,626 - Hi, Nick. - Hey. 158 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,836 - Hey. - Hi, I'm Andrew Glouberman. 159 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,713 Bridgeton Middle, first clarinet. 160 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:48,009 Look at you! You're fun to me. You're the big joke. 161 00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,427 - Thank you? - This hat. 162 00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,554 It's like the mall but it's on your head. 163 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,765 Well, I'll have you know I got it at the mall. 164 00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:57,352 So, how do you two know Roland? Are you dating her? 165 00:07:57,435 --> 00:08:00,063 - Andrew. - I only ask 'cause I know Nick likes her. 166 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,065 Or, I'm sorry, are you two dating each other? 167 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,275 Like, as gays, or maybe you're just people? 168 00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:07,028 Andrew, please, shut the fuck up. 169 00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:11,324 Yes! Mr. Boring, you are my next art installation. 170 00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:13,952 I don't mean to be rude, but what are you exactly? 171 00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:15,578 Shush down. I'm Mint. 172 00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,122 He is avant-garde artist. 173 00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:21,459 I once put a question mark after every sentence in the Bible. 174 00:08:21,543 --> 00:08:23,420 I hate my parents. 175 00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:25,171 Oh, yeah, me too. 176 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:28,466 Is that a picture of you with Max Greenfield from New Girl? 177 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:29,676 Schmidt, yeah. 178 00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:33,013 I guess we're, like, friends now. I don't know. 179 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:36,433 - He's too clingy. - Cool, cool, we're cool. 180 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:40,270 - So what are you doing in the city? - You texted me to come in. 181 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:44,691 - So you just like, came in? - No, I was coming in anyway. 182 00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:48,528 I wanted to go to the Freedom Tower and pay my respects. 183 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:51,614 You're like this little country mouse, huh? 184 00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:53,700 - Coming in from Westchester. - Uh... 185 00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:56,369 Well, this city cat's gonna corrupt you. 186 00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:57,537 Okay. 187 00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,164 Nick... Hi, Roland. 188 00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:02,250 - Uh, hi? - Nick, they're snorting pills out there. 189 00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:04,669 That's fine, Andrew, 'cause we're cool, too. 190 00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:07,338 They saw me take my vitamin. For dandruff, Roland. 191 00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:10,717 I take a vitamin for dandruff. They thought I was into pharmaceuticals. 192 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,594 Cool, Andrew, that's funny. 193 00:09:12,677 --> 00:09:15,305 I'm gonna rat 'em out to the doorman. I'm gonna rat out everyone. 194 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:17,891 - Andrew, you're panicking. - Oh, the heli's here. 195 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,642 Of course, a helicopter. 196 00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,895 Yeah. It's the only way to go to Montauk. 197 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:25,732 Mint is doing an installation for Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, 198 00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:28,777 - who's gonna be there, I guess. - You know The Rock? 199 00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:29,903 He's so clingy. 200 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:35,867 - Nick, I'm not getting on a helicopter. - What do you mean? 201 00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:39,079 We came to the city for an adventure, now we're gonna meet The Rock. 202 00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:43,750 Right, and as tempting as that is, I can't fly. 203 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,168 I have an inner ear thing. 204 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:47,754 What about when your family flew to Europe? 205 00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:49,756 That was a lie. We drove. 206 00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:52,258 - To Europe? - To Clearwater, Florida. 207 00:09:52,342 --> 00:09:56,638 Come on, Andrew. I got so close with Roland just now. I need this. 208 00:09:56,721 --> 00:09:59,933 Andrew, Mint's dolphoodle's gonna sit on your lap, 'kay? 209 00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:01,601 Mint's dolpho-what now? 210 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:05,021 Dolphoodle. It's a cross between a dolphin and a poodle. 211 00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:08,775 - Andrew, you know him. - I promise you I don't. 212 00:10:08,858 --> 00:10:11,611 Oh, dear God in heaven. 213 00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:14,572 - Hi, boy. - No, don't, my friend. 214 00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:17,992 Kevin eats fingers. He thinks they're baby corn. 215 00:10:18,076 --> 00:10:20,203 - Who's Kevin? - The dolphoodle. 216 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:23,832 - You have amnesia, you know him. - So, Nick, are you coming? 217 00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:26,751 I genuinely don't care, but just make a decision. 218 00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:30,797 Look, I'm not getting on that helicopter. 219 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:35,051 The kid I'm with can't fly. Is there any way we can meet you there? 220 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:38,638 Yeah, sure, whatever. It's Dwayne's place, it's on the beach. 221 00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:41,224 Great. We'll see you there, no problem. 222 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:45,145 Andrew, remember what I never told you, 223 00:10:45,228 --> 00:10:47,105 a scream can be music. 224 00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:48,982 I will, Mint. 225 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:50,567 Oh, no, no, my hat! 226 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,735 Oh, shit, no! Oh! 227 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:57,448 It's gone. I'll never forget the day I got that hat. 228 00:10:58,116 --> 00:10:59,534 That'll be $199. 229 00:10:59,617 --> 00:11:00,743 Um... 230 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,579 It's a chip, man. You gotta stick it in. 231 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,665 - Yeah, it's not working. - Fuck. Let me see it. 232 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:08,084 Oh, fuck me. James? 233 00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,879 Tanisha! 234 00:11:10,962 --> 00:11:13,506 - Nick, we have to find my hat. - We have to go to Montauk. 235 00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:16,801 We're not going anywhere until we find my hat. 236 00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:20,805 Fine, okay, we will find your jazz hat and then we will go to Montauk. 237 00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:25,310 And at some point I actually am going to need that Ezekiel bread. 238 00:11:25,393 --> 00:11:28,229 - Right, for your dandruff vitamin. - Yeah, it's a twice daily. 239 00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:30,523 Babe! Babe, unlock the door! 240 00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:32,859 What's going on in there? Are you okay? 241 00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:37,405 Jay, I felt it kick. 242 00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:38,948 What? Who kicked you? I'll kick his ass! 243 00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:41,200 - No, the baby. It's moving. - What? 244 00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:44,621 So just to clarify, that means the aborsh is completely off the tabes? 245 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,331 - Yeah, Jay. - Okay, good, yeah, yeah. 246 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:49,709 'Cause technically you can do it up until the baby's crowning. 247 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,753 Stop quoting your dad's law commercials. 248 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,504 Come here and feel it. 249 00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:54,964 - Whoa. - Yeah. 250 00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:57,216 Holy shit, babe, we created a life. 251 00:11:57,300 --> 00:12:01,220 - We did. - This might be my greatest magic trick. 252 00:12:01,304 --> 00:12:03,598 - We did it together. - It's like I'm the magician 253 00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:06,809 - and you're my trusted assistant. - Maybe we're both the magician. 254 00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:10,939 Pam, will you make me the happiest magician on Earth? 255 00:12:11,022 --> 00:12:12,081 Oh, Jay. 256 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,400 - No. - What?! 257 00:12:14,484 --> 00:12:18,279 I will throw myself down the stairs and frame you for the murder! 258 00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:20,448 All right, it's clear what happened here. 259 00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:24,285 The pillow, in a fit of rage, threw the sexy child magician 260 00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:26,120 down the stairs, he dies. 261 00:12:26,204 --> 00:12:29,207 She took him down. Goose down. 262 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,126 Have you seen my sunglasses? 263 00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:34,087 Are these your sunglasses? 264 00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:36,130 Whoa! The kid's magic. 265 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:39,467 Um, excuse me, have you seen this hat? 266 00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:42,178 Excuse me, ma'am, have you seen a lame jazz hat 267 00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:44,097 that's keeping me from my ultimate goal? 268 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:49,018 Sweetie pie, have you tried looking inside your own butthole? 269 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:50,770 - Pardon me? - Nick, it's me. 270 00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:52,313 Duke? 271 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:57,568 Did you know I've been inside 11 different people today? 272 00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:00,238 That ties my record from when I was alive. 273 00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:01,364 Wow. 274 00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:05,576 ♪ How those dicks hangin' ♪ ♪ You tiny cracker honkies? ♪ 275 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:09,330 - You're drunk, Duke. - No, you're Duke. 276 00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:12,208 - Drunk. - Duke, we lost my jazz hat. 277 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:14,210 Well, then, let's go and find it. 278 00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:16,004 We can't just go running around the city. 279 00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:18,006 - Of course you can. - We could get lost. 280 00:13:18,089 --> 00:13:19,507 That's nonsense. 281 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:22,343 You're never lost in New York City. 282 00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:27,724 ♪ If you're lost in the Apple ♪ ♪ And can't get found ♪ 283 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:31,144 ♪ Just hop the subway to Chinatown ♪ 284 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,855 ♪ Oops, I guess we're Brooklyn bound ♪ 285 00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:37,025 ♪ But you're never lost in New York City ♪ 286 00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:40,028 ♪ In Williamsburg all the old-time Jews ♪ 287 00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:43,114 ♪ Have rented their buildings ♪ ♪ To hipster dudes ♪ 288 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:46,034 ♪ With their waist-length beards ♪ ♪ And their buckled shoes ♪ 289 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:48,619 ♪ Still you're never lost ♪ ♪ In New York City ♪ 290 00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:50,163 Over there. 291 00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:52,373 ♪ In Little Odessa ♪ ♪ With the right tattoos ♪ 292 00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:55,126 ♪ Chances are you won't get shot ♪ 293 00:13:55,209 --> 00:13:58,421 ♪ And the vibe is shitty ♪ ♪ In Long Island City ♪ 294 00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:00,465 ♪ But it's one of old Duke's Favorite spots ♪ 295 00:14:01,674 --> 00:14:04,260 ♪ Flushing, Queens ♪ ♪ Is some messed-up jive ♪ 296 00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:07,430 ♪ Those mahjong ladies ♪ ♪ Will eat you alive ♪ 297 00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:10,850 ♪ There's poets and punks ♪ ♪ And hookers and creeps ♪ 298 00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:14,020 ♪ It's fucked-up and beautiful ♪ ♪ And it never sleeps ♪ 299 00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:17,940 ♪ Yeah, it's weird and wonderful ♪ ♪ Gorgeous and gritty ♪ 300 00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,817 ♪ But you're never lost ♪ 301 00:14:19,901 --> 00:14:24,364 ♪ In New York City ♪ 302 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:28,451 - Is he gonna be okay? - He's famously dead. 303 00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:29,994 I'm not too worried about him. 304 00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:32,288 We, on the other hand, are completely lost. 305 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,956 Oh, my God, look. 306 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,084 My jazz hat. Come on. 307 00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:38,102 Oh. 308 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:41,798 - Oh, my God. - What is this? Two girls, one hat. 309 00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:43,925 In flagrante de lesbo. 310 00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:45,802 It's a whole scene, man. 311 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,555 - Oh, me, oh, my. - That's Jessi's mom. 312 00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:52,683 She saw us. We're gonna be in oh so very much trouble. 313 00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:54,227 Let's all disappear. 314 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,937 - Nick? - Oh, my God. 315 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:58,272 - Andrew? - Just to be clear, 316 00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,733 we didn't see you kissing a lady who's not your husband. 317 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:03,069 This is obviously very awkward. 318 00:15:03,152 --> 00:15:04,695 - Is it? - It is. 319 00:15:04,779 --> 00:15:07,949 - Look, I'm in the midst of something. - Great. 320 00:15:08,032 --> 00:15:11,077 I met this person who happens to be a woman. 321 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:14,497 - No judgment. - And I've really connected with her. 322 00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,707 - And truthfully Greg and I... - Your husband. 323 00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:18,334 ... haven't been happy in a really long time. 324 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:21,838 And, you know, he's checked out, I'm trying to check in. 325 00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:25,049 - Does Jessi know? - No, and... 326 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:27,552 - I don't want her to know yet. - I see. 327 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:30,179 But I also know I can't ask you to lie. 328 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:33,433 So you need to do what you think is right. 329 00:15:35,726 --> 00:15:37,186 Oh, honey, your poor tummy. 330 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,604 I'm done. Wait... 331 00:15:38,688 --> 00:15:40,273 He speaks for both of us. 332 00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:42,942 Wait a sec, why aren't you two in school? 333 00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:44,777 - Why are you kissing a lady? - Yeah. 334 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:48,239 - Maybe I should just walk away. - Maybe we will, too. 335 00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:49,991 Let's just be normal 336 00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:52,285 when we see you, Seder second night. 337 00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:59,333 - Why won't you marry me? - Honey, you're still a child. 338 00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:01,210 How would you even support us? 339 00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,421 I don't know. I'll do whatever I have to do. 340 00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:05,840 We're in this together, Pam. I fuckin' love you. 341 00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:09,469 I love you, too, Jayvid Blaine. 342 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:11,554 - What'd you say? - Jayvid Blaine. 343 00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,681 - Oh, yeah. - Jay, put it in. 344 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,641 Okay. Damn it. 345 00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,435 - What's wrong? - Nothing. It's just... 346 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:19,145 It hasn't happened to me before. Hold on. 347 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:21,564 I'm just gonna cram it in soft, hope it gets hard inside. 348 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:24,609 - You think I'm disgusting, don't you? - What? No, no, no! 349 00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:26,527 - Of course not. - I'm huge! 350 00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:30,072 - No, you look beautiful. - I'm bursting at my seams, Jay! 351 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:33,910 No, you look gorgeous, are you kidding, babe? 352 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,746 Honestly, I think I'm just worried about, you know, 353 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,164 hurting the baby with my huge dick. 354 00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:41,584 Don't worry about the baby. The baby's fine. I want you inside me. 355 00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:43,961 - Yeah, say that again. - I said I want you inside me. 356 00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:46,631 - Mm, yeah! - Oh, now you're hard. 357 00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,966 I'm hard as like, ice. 358 00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:51,219 - Jay, put it in. - Oh! I'm 40! 359 00:16:51,302 --> 00:16:54,764 - Yeah. - My penis is next to the baby's head. 360 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,390 I'm rich! 361 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:57,725 That was crazy. 362 00:16:57,808 --> 00:17:00,061 Shannon is having an affair with a woman. 363 00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:02,772 Poor Greg. God, poor Jessi. 364 00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:04,565 Kinda puts things into perspective, huh? 365 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:06,943 Remember when your hat was important? Not that it isn't. 366 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,402 - The jazz hat is gone. - Yeah. 367 00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:10,571 - So let's just go home. - To Montauk. 368 00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:11,655 - What? - What? 369 00:17:11,656 --> 00:17:14,158 - You can't be serious. - Andrew, I looked for your hat, 370 00:17:14,242 --> 00:17:16,077 so now we go to Montauk. That was the deal. 371 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,664 Uh, no, I never explicitly agreed to go to Montauk. 372 00:17:19,747 --> 00:17:22,250 - Oh, my God, you're such a weasel. - Excuse me? 373 00:17:22,333 --> 00:17:25,169 Yeah, you're a scared weasel with a bad ear, 374 00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:27,004 dandruff, and the worst hat in America. 375 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:29,340 - What is with you and the hat? - It's embarrassing! 376 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,092 It's embarrassing or I'm embarrassing? 377 00:17:31,175 --> 00:17:34,720 - Forget it, just forget it. - No, no, I want to hear it. 378 00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:38,349 - What do you want to hear? - You think you're cool and I'm a loser. 379 00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:40,434 - Oh, please. - Well, I've got news for you. 380 00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:42,144 - You needed me. - Oh, really? 381 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:45,356 Yeah, because you were too afraid to go to the city alone. 382 00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:48,401 Am I out of my mind here? We could be at The Rock's house, 383 00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:51,529 who you got a boner for, which I never bring up 384 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:54,740 - because I'm such a nice guy. - Look, why don't you go to Montauk. 385 00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:57,326 I have 20 bucks, I'm gonna take a cab home. 386 00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:58,410 Oh, sorry. 387 00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:01,414 Kid, you made me drop my cocaine. You're gonna have to pay for that. 388 00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:05,668 Uh, well, I don't understand what's happening but I apologize. 389 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:09,088 You gotta pay me for the cocaine you just spilled. 390 00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:11,173 Please tell me you're the ghost of Duke Ellington. 391 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,842 Duke who? Fuck you. Gimme that. 392 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,428 - Oh, this is a mugging. - No, you're being scammed. 393 00:18:15,511 --> 00:18:16,846 Mugging is more like... 394 00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:18,556 Gimme all your money, fucko! 395 00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:19,890 Here you go, sir. 396 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,019 Sir, you forgot your cocaines. 397 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,563 It's cocaine, Andrew, and it's not real. 398 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,273 Oh, man. 399 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:32,028 Sorry for farting. 400 00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:33,696 I'm just so relaxed around you. 401 00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:36,032 No, I like the smell of your farts. 402 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:37,617 - They turn me on. - Cool. 403 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,620 Ooh, what is this, a delayed orgasm? 404 00:18:40,703 --> 00:18:42,330 Oh, yeah, baby, cum. 405 00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:46,208 No, Jay, it's a contraction. I'm going into labor. 406 00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:47,960 Wait, wait, okay, where do we go, the hospital? 407 00:18:48,044 --> 00:18:50,046 A seamstress? Bed Bath & Beyond? I don't know. 408 00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,590 - There's no time, it's coming! - What?! Already? 409 00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:55,509 How long is the gestation period of a human-pillow hybrid? 410 00:18:57,970 --> 00:19:00,640 This is so bad. 411 00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:03,267 - We have no idea where we are. - It's getting so late. 412 00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:05,603 Our parents are probably freaking out right now. 413 00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:07,647 I would've done so many things differently. 414 00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:09,565 - I would've wiped better. - What? 415 00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,192 It's not like I didn't wipe, 416 00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:14,362 but I should've wet the toilet paper and just really gotten in there. 417 00:19:14,445 --> 00:19:15,738 You didn't wipe well? 418 00:19:15,821 --> 00:19:18,282 Roland had one of those stupid Japanese toilets 419 00:19:18,366 --> 00:19:21,494 - and I didn't know how it flushed. - Oh, my God, we really are children. 420 00:19:21,577 --> 00:19:24,538 That's what I've been telling you all day. We're children. 421 00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:26,040 We'll figure it out, okay? 422 00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:30,044 - What are we gonna do? - Why does that building have kneepads? 423 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:39,553 Um, excuse me, we're looking for Steve. He's a regular. 424 00:19:39,637 --> 00:19:41,222 No, no Steve here. 425 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:42,973 Hey, boys, over here. Over here. 426 00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:46,185 For some reason everyone here calls me pendejo. 427 00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:49,063 Oh, my God, Coach Steve, you're a bartender? 428 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,524 Oh, you flatter me. No, barback. 429 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:55,027 My job is to get the egg smell onto the water glasses. 430 00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:57,697 - Coach Steve, we lied to you. - There's no field trip. 431 00:19:57,780 --> 00:20:00,241 - We were ditching school. - And then we got robbed, 432 00:20:00,324 --> 00:20:02,076 and we have no idea how to get home. 433 00:20:02,159 --> 00:20:04,245 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me get this straight. 434 00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:07,164 You looked me dead in the eye and you lied to me? 435 00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,084 That's a very intimate act between friends. 436 00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:12,420 - Can you help us get home? - Please? 437 00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:14,672 You come to me, your mentor... 438 00:20:14,755 --> 00:20:16,924 - "Mentor" is a strong word. - ... in your hour of need 439 00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:19,885 and you think I'm gonna turn you away? No chance. 440 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:21,721 Patrick, set my boys up 441 00:20:21,804 --> 00:20:25,474 with some of your Jamaican Me Crazy jerk chicken wings on the house. 442 00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:27,935 Pendejo, man, you do not work here. 443 00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:29,854 One more time and I'm calling the cops. 444 00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:31,397 Oh, he'll do it. We should go. 445 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,191 And stop rubbing those damn eggs on the glasses. 446 00:20:34,275 --> 00:20:36,360 All right, Pat. I'll see you tomorrow. 447 00:20:36,444 --> 00:20:38,362 - I'll bring my own eggs. - The hell you will. 448 00:20:38,446 --> 00:20:40,489 Oh, God! 449 00:20:40,573 --> 00:20:43,075 Just breathe, babe, just breathe. You're doing great. 450 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:45,745 - I can't do this! - Yes, you can. I'm right here. 451 00:20:45,828 --> 00:20:47,037 We're doing it together. 452 00:20:47,121 --> 00:20:49,457 - You and me? - You and me, always you and me, Pam. 453 00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:51,876 It's coming, I can see the tag. 454 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:54,211 Oh, my God. 455 00:20:54,295 --> 00:20:57,381 Oh, my God, he's beautiful. 456 00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:59,675 He looks just like you. 457 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:03,345 Does he? He kinda looks like my brother. 458 00:21:03,429 --> 00:21:04,972 No, he doesn't look like Curt. 459 00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:06,849 Why would you say Curt? 460 00:21:06,932 --> 00:21:09,935 - Just... - You lying bitch. 461 00:21:10,019 --> 00:21:13,564 - You fucked my brother? - I thought we had an open relationship. 462 00:21:13,647 --> 00:21:14,899 What would give you that impression? 463 00:21:14,982 --> 00:21:17,693 We have an open relationship. Oh, yeah. 464 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,780 You can fuck anybody you want, even my brothers. 465 00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:24,492 Okay, yeah, I might have sent some mixed signals. 466 00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:26,786 Oh, Jay, Curt meant nothing to me. 467 00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:28,829 With him it was just sex. 468 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:31,415 But with you, it's magic. 469 00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:34,627 You say such good stuff out of your mouth. 470 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,420 I fucking love you so much. 471 00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:38,631 I don't care if it's not my baby, I'm gonna raise him. 472 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:40,841 Oh, my God, you're amazing. 473 00:21:40,925 --> 00:21:44,720 You're just so generous, and you have the best body in your grade. 474 00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:46,096 - Come here. Yeah. - Really? 475 00:21:46,180 --> 00:21:49,058 - In front of Scorpion? - Is that his name? 476 00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:51,894 - I love it. - Fuck yeah, it's his name and I love you. 477 00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:53,729 I love you. Mm. 478 00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,231 - Baby, baby... Be gentle. - Oh, yeah. 479 00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:59,193 I'm so sore. But I want it so bad. 480 00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:01,070 Oh, my God... 481 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:04,615 I'm 41! Today's my birthday! 482 00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:09,119 Holy stromboli, you guys had an adventure today, huh? 483 00:22:09,203 --> 00:22:13,332 It reminds me of that classic The Doors song "Riders on the Storm". 484 00:22:13,415 --> 00:22:16,794 - You mind if I play it? - Oh, yeah, sure, go ahead, Coach Steve. 485 00:22:16,877 --> 00:22:20,256 - Oh. Oh, okay. - What a day. 486 00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:21,382 - God. - I know. 487 00:22:21,465 --> 00:22:22,800 Nice to be sitting in a car... 488 00:22:22,883 --> 00:22:26,971 - ♪ Storm ♪ - Well, not this car, but in theory, yes. 489 00:22:27,054 --> 00:22:29,932 - But we got through it, right? - Well, we got out of it. 490 00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:32,893 - ♪ Born ♪ - Yeah. I'm sorry about the hat. 491 00:22:32,977 --> 00:22:36,230 - Yeah. - I'm sorry that I found you embarrassing. 492 00:22:36,313 --> 00:22:38,691 I'm embarrassed by me all the time. 493 00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:41,068 Ray Manzarek with the haunting keys, huh? 494 00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:44,780 And Andrew, those city kids, they're not cooler than you. 495 00:22:44,863 --> 00:22:47,533 Oh, Nick, thank you. But they are... ♪ Storm ♪ 496 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:50,578 I know, I thought that was the thing to say, you know? 497 00:22:50,661 --> 00:22:54,456 Hey, I've been thinking, and maybe we should tell Jessi 498 00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:56,375 - about her mom. - I know. 499 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:58,377 It's gonna suck. 500 00:22:58,460 --> 00:23:00,754 Hey, it stopped raining. 501 00:23:00,838 --> 00:23:03,591 That was one hell of a... ♪ Storm! ♪ 502 00:23:03,674 --> 00:23:05,801 I'm very disappointed in you, Nicholas. 503 00:23:05,884 --> 00:23:08,827 But even more disappointed in myself, 504 00:23:08,828 --> 00:23:10,143 and there's gonna be consequences. I'm taking away 505 00:23:10,171 --> 00:23:13,267 my credit card and giving it to you. Here you go. 506 00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:15,603 In case you ever get lost in the city again. 507 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,732 - And you wanted to be the bad cop. - Yeah, that was my bad cop. 508 00:23:19,815 --> 00:23:24,111 Honey, your punishment is six weeks, no Netflix. 509 00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:25,279 - Six weeks? - Mm-hm. 510 00:23:25,362 --> 00:23:27,615 You're gonna take away Netflix, Mom? 511 00:23:27,698 --> 00:23:31,035 This is so unfair! What am I gonna do without Netflix? 512 00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:32,578 What were you thinking? 513 00:23:32,661 --> 00:23:34,955 You could have been lured into an electronics store 514 00:23:35,039 --> 00:23:38,167 by a pushy Israeli and forced to buy a camera you don't want. 515 00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:41,503 Worst of all, why would you go to Patrick Ewing's Brewing Company? 516 00:23:41,587 --> 00:23:44,882 That bum! All he did was take fadeaway jumpers and sweat profusely. 517 00:23:44,965 --> 00:23:47,217 You should've gone to Kiki Vandeweghe's Tiki Hideaway. 518 00:23:47,301 --> 00:23:49,219 That's a restaurant! 519 00:23:49,303 --> 00:23:53,390 Babe, I'm finished washing my dick if you're still psyched to blow me. 520 00:23:53,474 --> 00:23:54,642 Babe? 521 00:23:54,725 --> 00:23:55,976 Babe? 522 00:23:58,270 --> 00:24:02,191 My darling Jay, by the time you read this I'll be gone. 523 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:04,735 - What?! - And I've taken Scorpion with me. 524 00:24:04,818 --> 00:24:07,279 You shouldn't have to raise a child that isn't yours. 525 00:24:07,363 --> 00:24:08,906 Fucking bitch. 526 00:24:08,989 --> 00:24:11,742 And I bet you're calling me a fucking bitch right now. 527 00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:14,244 That's so you, telling it like it is. 528 00:24:14,328 --> 00:24:15,663 I'll miss that. 529 00:24:15,746 --> 00:24:18,707 But most of all I'll miss your great dick, 530 00:24:18,791 --> 00:24:20,959 your ripped abs, all of it. 531 00:24:21,043 --> 00:24:23,629 You're the whole package. Plus you're rich? 532 00:24:23,712 --> 00:24:25,798 What am I doing? You're a king. 533 00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:28,008 No, no, I must go. 534 00:24:28,092 --> 00:24:30,511 Goodbye, Jay. I love you. 535 00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:35,933 Oh, God, what am I gonna do? 536 00:24:36,016 --> 00:24:38,769 - Ooh. Hello there. - Put a rubber on, junior. 537 00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:43,190 - I got athlete's foot all over me. - Oh, I don't care one bit. 538 00:24:43,273 --> 00:24:45,776 Ooh! You're already wet. 539 00:24:47,111 --> 00:24:50,072 - Hey, guys. - All right, here she comes. 540 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:52,950 - We're telling her. - That her mom is cheating on her dad... 541 00:24:53,033 --> 00:24:56,328 - With a lesbian woman. Right. - ... who is not her father. 542 00:24:56,412 --> 00:24:58,747 So how was your big adventure in New York City? 543 00:24:58,831 --> 00:25:00,040 Anything crazy happen? 544 00:25:00,124 --> 00:25:03,711 Oh, um... Do you want to tell her, Andrew, or... ? 545 00:25:03,794 --> 00:25:06,630 No, I think you're better at opening your mouth and saying things. 546 00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:08,382 - Why don't you do the telling? - Okay. 547 00:25:08,465 --> 00:25:10,718 Well... Jessi... 548 00:25:10,801 --> 00:25:11,927 - What? - Um... 549 00:25:12,010 --> 00:25:14,430 - Jessi... - Guys, what is it? 550 00:25:14,513 --> 00:25:15,806 - Well... - We saw... 551 00:25:15,889 --> 00:25:19,435 There is someone out there cross-breeding dolphins with poodles. 552 00:25:19,518 --> 00:25:20,894 - I'm not following. - A dolphoodle! 553 00:25:20,978 --> 00:25:22,938 - Its name is Kevin. - And he eats fingers... 554 00:25:23,021 --> 00:25:25,107 - He thinks they're baby corn. Yes. - They're baby corn. 555 00:25:25,190 --> 00:25:27,860 Eww. People are sick. I'm glad I didn't go with you. 556 00:25:27,943 --> 00:25:29,903 Yeah, me too, 557 00:25:29,987 --> 00:25:33,532 'cause we saw some things you wouldn't have wanted to see. 558 00:25:33,615 --> 00:25:35,701 All right, well, hasta la vista. 559 00:25:36,702 --> 00:25:38,120 I blacked out. Did we tell her? 560 00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:41,707 - Jesus, Andrew, we blew it. - I'm sorry, I couldn't do it. 561 00:25:41,790 --> 00:25:43,751 - What couldn't you do? - Oh, nothing. 562 00:25:43,834 --> 00:25:45,961 - What's your problem? - Whoo! 563 00:25:46,044 --> 00:25:47,921 My dick is on fire. 564 00:25:48,005 --> 00:25:49,298 - Wanna know why? - No, I do not. 565 00:25:49,381 --> 00:25:50,758 - I'm fucking my bath mat. - What? 566 00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:56,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -