1 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:10,168 20 YEARS AGO 2 00:00:10,268 --> 00:00:11,169 STAR CINEMA TRUMAN SHOW 3 00:00:11,269 --> 00:00:12,546 Oh, I think we're early. 4 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:14,673 Yeah, the movie phone guy said, 5 00:00:14,773 --> 00:00:18,710 'You've selected The Truman Show, 9:00 p.m.' 6 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:21,471 I love that guy. - Hey, since we have a second, 7 00:00:21,571 --> 00:00:27,135 I was wondering if you would like to smoke some marijuana. 8 00:00:27,235 --> 00:00:28,520 You know, I would. 9 00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:31,648 I am pressing one for the chronic. 10 00:00:31,748 --> 00:00:35,902 Ho, ho-ho! You're the movie phone guy calling the movie phone guy. 11 00:00:36,002 --> 00:00:38,488 Yes. - Sounds like you've already smoked. 12 00:00:38,588 --> 00:00:40,699 Maybe just a little bit. 13 00:00:40,799 --> 00:00:42,784 [inhales, coughs] 14 00:00:42,884 --> 00:00:46,488 Sorry, weed is just really bad at this point in time. 15 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:50,825 Am I high, or is Jim Carrey not funny in this movie? 16 00:00:50,925 --> 00:00:52,994 [both chuckling] 17 00:00:53,094 --> 00:00:56,298 Wow, imagine finding out everything in your life was fake, 18 00:00:56,398 --> 00:00:59,009 and you were just a character on some TV show. 19 00:00:59,109 --> 00:01:00,552 That would be rough. 20 00:01:00,652 --> 00:01:03,180 You're real, right, Shannon? - I'm real, Greg. 21 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:07,267 That's good, 'cause I think I maybe love you. 22 00:01:07,367 --> 00:01:10,342 I think I maybe love you, too. 23 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,192 Jesus, Greg! - What? 24 00:01:15,292 --> 00:01:16,860 How many goddamn times do I have to ask you... 25 00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:19,946 ...not to forget your Eggo waffles in the toaster! 26 00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,448 Oh, please, Shannon. 27 00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:23,533 I left those in there three days ago. 28 00:01:23,633 --> 00:01:25,619 Maybe you would've noticed if you ever came up for air... 29 00:01:25,719 --> 00:01:27,037 ...from Cantor Dina's ass! 30 00:01:27,137 --> 00:01:30,916 Just pick one of your dad's CDs to drown out their squabbling. 31 00:01:31,016 --> 00:01:33,543 Phish? Grateful Dead? Widespread Panic? 32 00:01:33,643 --> 00:01:36,421 What is this crap? - They're jam bands, sweetie. 33 00:01:36,521 --> 00:01:41,259 They were created by Big Nitrus to sell canisters in parking lots. 34 00:01:41,359 --> 00:01:43,887 Whoa! Is this-- - Ganja? 35 00:01:43,987 --> 00:01:45,180 The Devil's Lettuce? - What? 36 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,140 Sticky Icky? Daddy Boom-balatti? - That's not--... 37 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,141 Turtle. - Turtle? 38 00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:49,309 Hot Snookum. - Really? 39 00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:51,853 Goat Cheese Omelette. - I got it. 40 00:01:51,953 --> 00:01:54,758 Snoop's Bunion! - Stop! 41 00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:27,097 [bell rings] 42 00:02:27,197 --> 00:02:29,257 TODAY'S LUNCH: GOAT CHEESE OMELET 43 00:02:29,357 --> 00:02:31,977 Andrew! Where do you think you're going? 44 00:02:32,077 --> 00:02:34,179 Uh... home? - Oh my God! What the hell? 45 00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:37,149 My dad wants me to help him throw out old Newsweek 's. 46 00:02:37,249 --> 00:02:40,235 You're not going anywhere without giving me a kiss goodbye. 47 00:02:40,335 --> 00:02:42,154 Now that you're my boyfriend, 48 00:02:42,254 --> 00:02:43,697 there are like, rules. 49 00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:45,824 Wait, I'm your boyfriend? Since when? 50 00:02:45,924 --> 00:02:48,910 Hello? Since we Frenched twice already. 51 00:02:49,010 --> 00:02:51,705 And her tongue was slick and meaty, like a fresh trout. 52 00:02:51,805 --> 00:02:54,908 I do like a nice flakey fish. - Who doesn't? 53 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,751 [coughs] When did you start smoking? 54 00:02:56,851 --> 00:03:00,046 Around when you started dating this chick. I don't think the two are connected. 55 00:03:00,146 --> 00:03:01,756 I could quit anytime. 56 00:03:01,856 --> 00:03:05,177 Um, maybe we could go someplace a little more private to kiss, 57 00:03:05,277 --> 00:03:08,713 like I don't know, that abandoned Wendy's down the street? 58 00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:12,642 No, I want to do it right here with everyone watching, 59 00:03:12,742 --> 00:03:15,187 you clump of shower drain hair. 60 00:03:15,287 --> 00:03:16,730 [Shame Wizard laughing] 61 00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:21,860 This young woman truly appreciates that you're a human refuse. 62 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,570 You should be treated as such. 63 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,363 That's some twisted shit, dude. 64 00:03:25,463 --> 00:03:28,700 Indeed. Do you care for a drink? - I'm good. The smokes are plenty. 65 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:30,869 But you're way more fun when you drink. 66 00:03:30,969 --> 00:03:32,329 Really? Is that what people are saying? 67 00:03:32,429 --> 00:03:35,290 Come on, Maurice. Just a quick nip. 68 00:03:35,390 --> 00:03:37,700 Nip? [chuckles] All right. 69 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,253 Gachi-machi. Andrew, let's do it. 70 00:03:40,353 --> 00:03:42,172 Let's French this blonde meatball. 71 00:03:42,272 --> 00:03:44,907 Yeah. 72 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:50,096 Oh, wow. - Andrew and Lola? 73 00:03:50,196 --> 00:03:52,557 This is how I felt when I saw my pediatrician at Lids. 74 00:03:52,657 --> 00:03:54,726 I couldn't believe it was happening right in front of me. 75 00:03:54,826 --> 00:03:57,312 Who cares? My boy's getting it. - Ooh! 76 00:03:57,412 --> 00:03:59,731 Take it, Andrew! Get it and then take it. 77 00:03:59,831 --> 00:04:02,609 Oh, no. That's not good. They're brother-sister. 78 00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:04,903 No, they aren't. - Then why are they kissing? 79 00:04:05,003 --> 00:04:06,947 Well, they're-- Because they're not brother and sister. 80 00:04:07,047 --> 00:04:09,107 What? - Wait, what? 81 00:04:09,207 --> 00:04:12,077 That was like, stupid romantic. 82 00:04:12,177 --> 00:04:14,412 Now hold my book bag. I need to go piss. 83 00:04:14,512 --> 00:04:17,165 I had two Barq's root beer at lunch. - Okay. 84 00:04:17,265 --> 00:04:19,501 Meet me outside. You're walking me home! 85 00:04:19,601 --> 00:04:22,420 [grunts] - So, bud, how's it going? 86 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:24,130 Oh, things are going well. 87 00:04:24,230 --> 00:04:25,707 Lola... You know Lola, right? 88 00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:26,925 I do indeed. 89 00:04:27,025 --> 00:04:28,593 She says that I'm her boyfriend. 90 00:04:28,693 --> 00:04:31,638 Oh, wow, that's really-- - It's terrible, Nick! 91 00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,307 Good, yeah. It's really a nightmare to watch. 92 00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:37,769 Yeah, it's not that great to live either. - I can only imagine. 93 00:04:37,869 --> 00:04:40,063 I have to break up with her, or kill her. Or fake my own death. 94 00:04:40,163 --> 00:04:41,231 Maybe join the army. 95 00:04:41,331 --> 00:04:43,766 There's not a war on, is there? Like, other than the three wars. 96 00:04:43,866 --> 00:04:45,360 No. Break up with her. - You really should, 97 00:04:45,460 --> 00:04:48,280 because right now, you are Lola's boyfriend. 98 00:04:48,380 --> 00:04:50,073 Stop it. - I'm standing here... 99 00:04:50,173 --> 00:04:52,284 ...with Lola's... - Stop it. Please stop saying that. 100 00:04:52,384 --> 00:04:53,785 ...boyfriend. - I have a name! 101 00:04:53,885 --> 00:04:56,079 Okay, bye, LBW. - LBW? 102 00:04:56,179 --> 00:04:58,790 What's the W for? - Lola's Boyfriend... 103 00:04:58,890 --> 00:05:00,041 Wow. [laughs] 104 00:05:00,141 --> 00:05:01,459 Wow, indeed. 105 00:05:01,559 --> 00:05:04,095 Dude, Andrew and Lola is like... 106 00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:07,382 ...woof. - Yeah, totally. Woof to the max. 107 00:05:07,482 --> 00:05:09,384 Uh... should we just make a left here now? 108 00:05:09,484 --> 00:05:12,470 Why? - I just don't have to talk to Gena. 109 00:05:12,570 --> 00:05:14,639 It's still so awkward. - Yeah, I know. 110 00:05:14,739 --> 00:05:16,725 Everything is super weird right now. - I know. 111 00:05:16,825 --> 00:05:19,519 You know, we're going through changes. - Exactly. 112 00:05:19,619 --> 00:05:21,771 It just feels almost as if we could try drugs for the first time, 113 00:05:21,871 --> 00:05:23,440 and it wouldn't even be a big deal. - What? 114 00:05:23,540 --> 00:05:25,150 What? - Did you just say we should try drugs? 115 00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:26,943 I didn't say that. - I think you just--... 116 00:05:27,043 --> 00:05:28,945 I feel weird that you're saying it. - I'm super confused. 117 00:05:29,045 --> 00:05:31,197 Look what I found in my dad's stash. - Gummy Bears? 118 00:05:31,297 --> 00:05:32,574 It's weed. They're edibles. 119 00:05:32,674 --> 00:05:34,200 Edibles? Jesse... - Yes? 120 00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:35,827 Are you suggesting... - Maybe? 121 00:05:35,927 --> 00:05:37,912 I mean, are we those kids? - [scoffs] 122 00:05:38,012 --> 00:05:39,873 Look, Barack Obama smoked weed. 123 00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:42,208 He was our best president, and his wife is perfect. 124 00:05:42,308 --> 00:05:43,376 God, don't you miss them? 125 00:05:43,476 --> 00:05:45,503 Every day. Their daughters, that dog... 126 00:05:45,603 --> 00:05:47,881 Right. - Hold on, are you peer pressuring me? 127 00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,424 No, of course not! 128 00:05:49,524 --> 00:05:52,052 If you want to have a little dick and do little dick boys' stuff... 129 00:05:52,152 --> 00:05:55,463 No! I want to be a big dick boy. - All right. 130 00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:57,682 Hmm. I think I can kind of taste the weed. 131 00:05:57,782 --> 00:05:58,975 You know, I don't mind it, 132 00:05:59,075 --> 00:06:00,352 'cause I got a big dick! - What? 133 00:06:00,452 --> 00:06:02,562 Biddy-bee! Big dick boy! - Argh! 134 00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,439 Smoke chronic, big dick! - What voice is that? 135 00:06:04,539 --> 00:06:07,892 Biddy-bee smoke weed-ee-weed. - This might've been a mistake. 136 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:11,604 Like, welcome to my condo, Andrew. 137 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:15,617 What a lovely home. Is your TV fake? 138 00:06:15,717 --> 00:06:18,987 Yeah, my mom staged the place to be sold, 139 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:23,074 so like everything is, like, not as it seems. 140 00:06:23,174 --> 00:06:25,835 Oh, I love this condominium. 141 00:06:25,935 --> 00:06:28,213 It simply reeks of shame. 142 00:06:28,313 --> 00:06:30,423 I think it's all the Aerosmith Glade plugins. 143 00:06:30,523 --> 00:06:32,133 [hissing, shouting] 144 00:06:32,233 --> 00:06:34,260 This whole thing is giving me a fucking migraine. 145 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:35,387 I have something for that. 146 00:06:35,487 --> 00:06:37,487 KLO-LOLA-PIN 20 mg... 147 00:06:38,564 --> 00:06:39,974 Okay. - Look! 148 00:06:40,074 --> 00:06:42,685 That's when my mom took me and Devin to see Mow Mow, 149 00:06:42,785 --> 00:06:45,063 the barren koala. - Wait, what? 150 00:06:45,163 --> 00:06:48,024 [Lola] It was on a baseball field. It was awesome. 151 00:06:48,124 --> 00:06:51,069 Huh. It looks like you're cut out of the frame. 152 00:06:51,169 --> 00:06:53,021 I know. My mom is so funny. 153 00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:54,155 This one time, 154 00:06:54,255 --> 00:06:57,158 she always joke said she wishes I was Devin. 155 00:06:57,258 --> 00:07:00,245 Yeah, my dad always jokes that I was somehow responsible... 156 00:07:00,345 --> 00:07:02,288 ...for Charlie Sheen leaving Two and a Half Men. 157 00:07:02,388 --> 00:07:04,874 Oh my God. We're like the same. 158 00:07:04,974 --> 00:07:08,086 Ha-ha. Yeah! I need to end this before it goes any further, right? 159 00:07:08,186 --> 00:07:09,170 Yeah, good call. 160 00:07:09,270 --> 00:07:13,750 So, Lola, I was thinking that maybe we should-- 161 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:17,186 That maybe we should rub fronts? 162 00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:18,888 Oi va-voy. 163 00:07:18,988 --> 00:07:21,391 Hold on. Does he wanna dry hump? 164 00:07:21,491 --> 00:07:23,393 Oh, God. - You can't pass up the opportunity... 165 00:07:23,493 --> 00:07:26,146 ...to grind your dick against a rough denim pant. 166 00:07:26,246 --> 00:07:28,940 But wasn't I about to break up with her? - Yeah, right. 167 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,067 Let's stay focused. - Need a little pick-me-up, friend? 168 00:07:31,167 --> 00:07:31,985 LOLAINE 169 00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:34,863 Wait, is that coke? No, get that shit out of here, 170 00:07:34,963 --> 00:07:36,439 Unless you're gonna throw it out, 171 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:38,950 then I'll just... [sniffs] stick it up my nose for safe-keeping. 172 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,243 [sniffs] 173 00:07:40,343 --> 00:07:43,946 Hey, Humpty Dumpty, last one to rub my front is a rotten egg, 174 00:07:44,046 --> 00:07:46,991 you, rotten egg. - Oh, God. 175 00:07:47,091 --> 00:07:48,918 That actually sounds kind of nice. 176 00:07:49,018 --> 00:07:51,913 Spread 'em, so we can Lego our legs. 177 00:07:52,013 --> 00:07:53,882 Yeah! Lego her Eggo, you rotten egg! 178 00:07:53,982 --> 00:07:55,508 Okay, easy. Okay... 179 00:07:55,608 --> 00:07:58,961 ...[Maury] Hmm! Yummy! - [Shadow Wizard evil laughter] 180 00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:00,555 I don't think I feel anything. 181 00:08:00,655 --> 00:08:01,598 Yeah, me neither. 182 00:08:01,698 --> 00:08:05,018 I will say your elbows are hilarious. - Yeah, elbows. 183 00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:07,479 I guess they're the knees of the arms, you know what I mean? 184 00:08:07,579 --> 00:08:08,938 If the elbows are the knees of the arms, 185 00:08:09,038 --> 00:08:12,192 then are the knuckles the knees of the finger? 186 00:08:12,292 --> 00:08:15,352 Finger-knees. - Finger... 187 00:08:15,411 --> 00:08:17,572 Are we high? - I don't know. 188 00:08:17,672 --> 00:08:20,116 I mean, I do feel very good right now, 189 00:08:20,216 --> 00:08:24,320 and I can see why my dad is addicted to this. 190 00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:27,790 Am I allowed to laugh at that, too? - Yes, it's really funny. 191 00:08:27,890 --> 00:08:30,001 Oh my God. - We are so funny right now. 192 00:08:30,101 --> 00:08:31,336 Whoa, whoa! 193 00:08:31,436 --> 00:08:33,296 Look at my finger-knees move. - Whoa! 194 00:08:33,396 --> 00:08:34,589 I'm literally not doing this. 195 00:08:34,689 --> 00:08:37,500 It's so crazy. - My fingers are moving, and... 196 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,710 ...[Nick] Whoa! - [Jesse] Whoa! 197 00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:41,554 That's crazy. - [Nick] So crazy. 198 00:08:41,654 --> 00:08:43,556 [Jesse] Wait, did you hear me say that? 199 00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:45,934 Because I did not say it out loud. 200 00:08:46,034 --> 00:08:47,560 [Nick] Yeah, I can totally hear you. 201 00:08:47,660 --> 00:08:50,730 Jesse, are we speaking telepathically? 202 00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:53,066 [Jesse] Yeah, we are. This is nuts! 203 00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:55,485 I'm saying things back with my mind! 204 00:08:55,585 --> 00:08:57,487 Me too, but my mouth isn't moving at all. 205 00:08:57,587 --> 00:08:59,030 No, mine's not moving either! 206 00:08:59,130 --> 00:09:02,909 This is the craziest thing humanity has ever seen. 207 00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:04,702 [both panting] 208 00:09:04,802 --> 00:09:08,248 This feels real good, but it's real wrong, right? 209 00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:10,083 We gotta get the fuck out of here. 210 00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:13,628 But, Maurice, the party's just getting started. 211 00:09:13,728 --> 00:09:16,673 Lola, I can't help but think-- Oh my God. 212 00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:18,591 Okay, but after this, no more. 213 00:09:18,691 --> 00:09:19,509 Of course! 214 00:09:19,609 --> 00:09:22,679 It's actually very freeing to know that this is the last time. 215 00:09:22,779 --> 00:09:23,805 [both moaning]... 216 00:09:23,905 --> 00:09:25,557 ...[sniffing]... 217 00:09:25,657 --> 00:09:27,350 ...[groans] - Aah! 218 00:09:27,450 --> 00:09:29,677 [hissing]... 219 00:09:29,777 --> 00:09:32,138 ...[moans, grunts] 220 00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:34,440 A little more. A little bit more. 221 00:09:34,540 --> 00:09:35,525 [exhales deeply] 222 00:09:35,625 --> 00:09:37,277 Oh my God, Andrew. 223 00:09:37,377 --> 00:09:39,487 Is there supposed to be that much? 224 00:09:39,587 --> 00:09:42,407 But in the same token, I'm very flattered. 225 00:09:42,507 --> 00:09:44,284 I'm so sorry. I normally don't--... 226 00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:46,744 ...[groaning] A bit of an after-shock. Sorry. 227 00:09:46,844 --> 00:09:47,996 We should totally cuddle... 228 00:09:48,096 --> 00:09:51,699 ...after I get a string cheese from the garage. 229 00:09:51,799 --> 00:09:52,875 [Shame Wizard laughs] 230 00:09:52,975 --> 00:09:56,254 Poor Andrew. You can't very well break up with her now. 231 00:09:56,354 --> 00:09:57,547 Oh, shit. I can't? 232 00:09:57,647 --> 00:10:02,969 You're not the sort of boy who rubs fronts with the world's saddest girl... 233 00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:05,463 ...and leaves right after, are you? 234 00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:07,473 No, I guess I'm not. 235 00:10:07,573 --> 00:10:12,011 Let's go for a string cheese. You lost a lot of protein, brother. 236 00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:13,888 Finger-knees! 237 00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:17,983 I went on a vacation to the finger-knees! 238 00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:20,028 You were the right person to get high with. 239 00:10:20,128 --> 00:10:21,738 Stop laughing at me. - [laughing] 240 00:10:21,838 --> 00:10:22,739 Stop it! 241 00:10:22,839 --> 00:10:25,742 Um... Okay? - I'm hungry and my teeth are too hard. 242 00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,693 Okay, no worries. 243 00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:30,622 Peace and love. We're all good. Wait, look! Across the street. 244 00:10:30,722 --> 00:10:32,957 It's Missy's house. She'll feed us, man. 245 00:10:33,057 --> 00:10:34,751 Yeah, Missy's good. She's peace and love. 246 00:10:34,851 --> 00:10:37,003 She's totally peace and love. Everything's fine. 247 00:10:37,103 --> 00:10:39,088 Missy peace and love. - Just keep it together, dude. 248 00:10:39,188 --> 00:10:40,381 [door bell rings] 249 00:10:40,481 --> 00:10:43,801 Jesse? Nick? Could it be? A drop by playdate? 250 00:10:43,901 --> 00:10:45,211 What a nice surprise! 251 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:46,971 Hello, friends of Missy. 252 00:10:47,071 --> 00:10:49,451 I am Embarrassing Robot Dad. 253 00:10:49,490 --> 00:10:50,516 What? - Dad! 254 00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:53,102 That's too funny! Oh my God, this is already going great. 255 00:10:53,202 --> 00:10:55,188 What's this guy's fucking deal? Is he fucking with us? 256 00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:57,774 Nick, chill out. - Fuck this guy. He fucking knows. 257 00:10:57,874 --> 00:10:59,108 Whoa! 258 00:10:59,208 --> 00:11:02,570 I've never noticed how cool your house is before, Missy. 259 00:11:02,670 --> 00:11:03,529 Uh, yeah. 260 00:11:03,629 --> 00:11:07,617 Monica, what is this hypnotic music that's like giving me life right now? 261 00:11:07,717 --> 00:11:10,111 I don't like it. - It's Northern African tribal music, 262 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,829 and Nick, you'll find this funny, 263 00:11:11,929 --> 00:11:14,248 the band's actually called Steely Sudan. 264 00:11:14,348 --> 00:11:15,708 Ha-ha, yeah. Oh, ha-ha. 265 00:11:15,808 --> 00:11:17,168 Is that how I laugh? I forget. 266 00:11:17,268 --> 00:11:19,504 I think I need to get some food into my system. 267 00:11:19,604 --> 00:11:22,924 Oh, good! We were just about to do an Ezekiel bread rising. 268 00:11:23,024 --> 00:11:25,968 And we have room temp carrot juice, so hope your appetite's up. 269 00:11:26,068 --> 00:11:30,047 Oh my God, that is exactly what I was craving. 270 00:11:30,147 --> 00:11:32,266 I guess my real question is, 271 00:11:32,366 --> 00:11:34,185 can you hear the beat? - What? 272 00:11:34,285 --> 00:11:35,812 Can anyone hear the beat? - Oh my God! 273 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:37,647 Can you hear the beat? 274 00:11:37,747 --> 00:11:39,482 I saw your penis. - Gena? 275 00:11:39,582 --> 00:11:40,817 Tiny penis. - What? 276 00:11:40,917 --> 00:11:43,277 I saw your penis. Tiny penis! - [Nick] Oh my God. 277 00:11:43,377 --> 00:11:45,154 Bonjour, little dick boy. 278 00:11:45,254 --> 00:11:48,157 Life is meaningless, and you are all alone. 279 00:11:48,257 --> 00:11:49,325 What? - [man 1] Alone. 280 00:11:49,425 --> 00:11:50,702 I am? - [man 1] Forever. 281 00:11:50,802 --> 00:11:51,703 Alone. 282 00:11:51,803 --> 00:11:55,239 [Jesse] Can you... - [Missy] Stop saying that! 283 00:11:55,339 --> 00:11:58,117 Can you, Missy, hear the beat? - I can hear it! 284 00:11:58,217 --> 00:12:00,753 If I can just get everyone's attention, I'd love to make a toast. 285 00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:02,880 You have a really cool house, but it's freaking me out, 286 00:12:02,980 --> 00:12:06,334 and I need to be alone right fucking now. 287 00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:08,961 Oh! Thank God. What? 288 00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:12,715 Alone Zone? Oh no. 289 00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:15,017 Thank you for lending me these pants? 290 00:12:15,117 --> 00:12:17,979 It's like I basically own you now. 291 00:12:18,079 --> 00:12:21,482 Hey, man, we gotta get out of here. I feel like I've been awake for a month. 292 00:12:21,582 --> 00:12:24,026 Lola, this has been wonderful, 293 00:12:24,126 --> 00:12:25,987 but I actually have to get home for dinner. 294 00:12:26,087 --> 00:12:28,865 Well, I have dinner plans too, Mr. Popular. 295 00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:33,077 I'm dying solo on a margarita fettuccine Lean Cuisine I thawed in the sink, 296 00:12:33,177 --> 00:12:35,538 because my microwave is broken. 297 00:12:35,638 --> 00:12:38,291 So you're just gonna leave her here all alone... 298 00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:40,376 ...while you waltz off in her pants, 299 00:12:40,476 --> 00:12:42,545 because you defiled yours? 300 00:12:42,645 --> 00:12:44,464 Oh God, he's right. 301 00:12:44,564 --> 00:12:48,134 Lola, do you want to come over to my house for dinner? 302 00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:50,052 What? Are you joking me? 303 00:12:50,152 --> 00:12:51,304 Who would want that? 304 00:12:51,404 --> 00:12:54,048 No, but like, I definitely will. 305 00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:55,850 Hello? Is anybody here? 306 00:12:55,950 --> 00:12:56,851 I'm here. 307 00:12:56,951 --> 00:12:58,853 What? Who are you? - I'm you... 308 00:12:58,953 --> 00:13:00,480 ...in the future. 309 00:13:00,580 --> 00:13:03,399 Wait, what's future me doing in the Alone Zone? 310 00:13:03,499 --> 00:13:04,817 You live here. - What? 311 00:13:04,917 --> 00:13:07,320 So come on in or shake your booty, 312 00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:10,656 'cause this is your fabulous life. 313 00:13:10,756 --> 00:13:12,909 Whoa! This place is baller. 314 00:13:13,009 --> 00:13:14,368 What do I do in the future? 315 00:13:14,468 --> 00:13:17,455 You're a TV personality, Nick. Star, of course... 316 00:13:17,555 --> 00:13:20,032 Whoa! - ...and you have your own show on Nitflax. 317 00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:23,461 It's a cartoon about how you rocked as a kid. 318 00:13:23,561 --> 00:13:25,254 Do I like it? - You don't mind it, 319 00:13:25,354 --> 00:13:27,965 although you'd like to do more dramatic roles. 320 00:13:28,065 --> 00:13:29,342 How come? - I don't know. 321 00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:31,219 It's a pure ego thing. 322 00:13:31,319 --> 00:13:33,054 So I'm happy, right? 323 00:13:33,154 --> 00:13:35,765 Nick, you make more money than you could ever use, 324 00:13:35,865 --> 00:13:38,726 and you feel alone every single day. 325 00:13:38,826 --> 00:13:41,813 So do I have a wife or kids? 326 00:13:41,913 --> 00:13:45,024 [chuckles] No way, Nick. Those things have needs, 327 00:13:45,124 --> 00:13:46,818 and you're allergic to that. 328 00:13:46,918 --> 00:13:51,113 You'll always have the company of your best friend and robot Butler, 329 00:13:51,213 --> 00:13:53,574 Andrew 3000. 330 00:13:53,674 --> 00:13:55,952 I cleaned your bidet, Mr. Star. 331 00:13:56,052 --> 00:13:59,831 If I am unneeded I will go to my jack off cubby and jack off. 332 00:13:59,931 --> 00:14:02,250 See you later, simulated best friend. 333 00:14:02,350 --> 00:14:03,918 Correction: Only friend. 334 00:14:04,018 --> 00:14:05,253 Goodbye, Nick. 335 00:14:05,353 --> 00:14:08,164 Nick... 336 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:10,132 Nick! Earth to Nick! 337 00:14:10,232 --> 00:14:11,467 Dude, are you all right? 338 00:14:11,567 --> 00:14:13,761 You farted, and then you said we were at war. 339 00:14:13,861 --> 00:14:15,763 Oh, yeah. I just gotta... 340 00:14:15,863 --> 00:14:18,674 I think I'm just gonna get the fuck out of here. 341 00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:20,393 What? - Nick, come back! 342 00:14:20,493 --> 00:14:22,812 We were having so much fun! - Oh, no. 343 00:14:22,912 --> 00:14:24,981 That little dude is going tweakie-deekie! 344 00:14:25,081 --> 00:14:27,608 What's wrong with Nick? - Don't tell her! She's a snitch! 345 00:14:27,708 --> 00:14:31,028 Okay, Missy, you seriously have to promise not to say anything... 346 00:14:31,128 --> 00:14:32,071 Of course. - ...to anyone. 347 00:14:32,171 --> 00:14:33,823 I'd be proud to be your confidant. 348 00:14:33,923 --> 00:14:36,233 [deep exhales] 349 00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:38,244 Nick and I ate some weed gummies, and got so high, 350 00:14:38,344 --> 00:14:39,996 and now he's freaking out, and I don't know what to do. 351 00:14:40,096 --> 00:14:42,832 Ozari! You guys did marijuana? 352 00:14:42,932 --> 00:14:45,167 Don't you know what that will do to your developing brains? 353 00:14:45,267 --> 00:14:47,545 You're probably never gonna be able to remember anything again. 354 00:14:47,645 --> 00:14:50,423 Do you know who I am right now? God, I'm freaking out. 355 00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:52,833 Am I getting a contact high? Are we going to jail? 356 00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:55,177 [groans] I cannot deal with this nerd. 357 00:14:55,277 --> 00:14:57,471 I'm gonna lie down and watch the Great British Bake Off. 358 00:14:57,571 --> 00:14:59,724 They're so nice to each other. 359 00:14:59,824 --> 00:15:02,393 Missy, can you please just help me find Nick? 360 00:15:02,493 --> 00:15:04,687 Fine. But then you're going straight to rehab. 361 00:15:04,787 --> 00:15:05,771 Okay, yeah, right. 362 00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:08,232 I'm gonna find a way to snitch you out. - What? 363 00:15:08,332 --> 00:15:10,976 [panting] - Is that... Oh, shit. 364 00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:12,403 Nick. Hey! 365 00:15:12,503 --> 00:15:15,239 I was just trying out that new Uber bicycle app, 366 00:15:15,339 --> 00:15:17,658 and Lola is one of their drivers. 367 00:15:17,758 --> 00:15:19,410 Oh my God. He's lying. 368 00:15:19,510 --> 00:15:21,120 He blammo'd in his pants... 369 00:15:21,220 --> 00:15:23,748 ...and now we're both literally starving. 370 00:15:23,848 --> 00:15:25,541 Me, too. We're all starving... 371 00:15:25,641 --> 00:15:27,752 ...for human connection. - What? 372 00:15:27,852 --> 00:15:30,338 Andrew, listen to me. You gotta hold onto Lola. 373 00:15:30,438 --> 00:15:32,465 If you don't, you're gonna meet your future self... 374 00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:35,176 ...and he's gonna remind you of Bill Maher. - What? 375 00:15:35,276 --> 00:15:36,427 [dog barking] - [panting]... 376 00:15:36,527 --> 00:15:38,763 ...[dog] Nick! - What? Who said that? Who's there? 377 00:15:38,863 --> 00:15:41,057 [dog] Over here, man. Behind the gate. 378 00:15:41,157 --> 00:15:42,183 Hey, Nick. 379 00:15:42,283 --> 00:15:46,187 You're Jay's Pitbull Featuring Ludacris, and you can talk. 380 00:15:46,287 --> 00:15:48,356 You don't look so good. Everything okay? 381 00:15:48,456 --> 00:15:50,441 No, I'm worried that I'm gonna die alone. 382 00:15:50,541 --> 00:15:52,693 Hey, Brother. I get it. 383 00:15:52,793 --> 00:15:55,446 There was this beagle who lived next door at the Goldbergs. 384 00:15:55,546 --> 00:15:56,739 We really hit it off. 385 00:15:56,839 --> 00:15:59,116 She was super funny, kind eyes. 386 00:15:59,216 --> 00:16:00,034 That's really nice. 387 00:16:00,134 --> 00:16:03,996 So I wanted to, you know, jack hammer her so hard, 388 00:16:04,096 --> 00:16:04,914 Oh. 389 00:16:05,014 --> 00:16:07,375 My back paws sliding across the kitchen floor. 390 00:16:07,475 --> 00:16:09,460 Sure. - But she wasn't in heat, 391 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:12,088 so I kind of bailed on her. - Oh really? 392 00:16:12,188 --> 00:16:15,383 And then Jay's brother pegged her in the eye with a slingshot. 393 00:16:15,483 --> 00:16:17,885 And... she died. - Oh my God. 394 00:16:17,985 --> 00:16:21,180 Yeah, man. Real connection is rare... 395 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,557 ...like a white shit. 396 00:16:23,657 --> 00:16:25,685 Whoa! You are such a wise dog. 397 00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:26,894 Thanks, man. 398 00:16:26,994 --> 00:16:29,647 I like you, too. - Nick, what the hell? 399 00:16:29,747 --> 00:16:33,651 We should hang out more. - Featuring Ludacris will shred your balls. 400 00:16:33,751 --> 00:16:37,196 Just ask my neighbor, Darren. His sack looks like a park basketball net. 401 00:16:37,296 --> 00:16:39,407 [laughs] What an idiot. - There you are! 402 00:16:39,507 --> 00:16:42,284 We've been looking all over for you. - What are you guys doing here? 403 00:16:42,384 --> 00:16:44,370 Nick and Jesse got high on marijuana drug candy, 404 00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:46,455 and Nick is freaking out and Jesse feels super guilty. 405 00:16:46,555 --> 00:16:47,873 [Jesse] Missy! - I'm also disappointed... 406 00:16:47,973 --> 00:16:50,001 'cause I thought there was stopping by for an impromptu playdate, 407 00:16:50,101 --> 00:16:51,877 but they weren't. - Told you not to say anything! 408 00:16:51,977 --> 00:16:53,629 Oh shit, you guys are stoned? 409 00:16:53,729 --> 00:16:55,798 Oh! I haven't smoked pot since the third grade. 410 00:16:55,898 --> 00:16:58,792 It was fucking with my libido. I couldn't get hard... 411 00:16:58,892 --> 00:17:00,052 ...enough. - Ugh! 412 00:17:00,152 --> 00:17:01,637 Ugh! I think I need some food. 413 00:17:01,737 --> 00:17:04,765 Hey, isn't there that off-brand ice cream place right around the corner? 414 00:17:04,865 --> 00:17:06,392 Ooh, Basket Roberts! 415 00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:10,104 If you guys take me to ice cream, I will give blowjobs to everyone. 416 00:17:10,204 --> 00:17:11,814 All right, let's do this. - Jay! 417 00:17:11,914 --> 00:17:14,775 What? A blowjob's a blowjob. Don't be gay. 418 00:17:14,875 --> 00:17:15,735 [door opens] 419 00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:16,652 You're late! 420 00:17:16,752 --> 00:17:18,946 I had to throw out those Newsweek 's myself! 421 00:17:19,046 --> 00:17:20,239 Andrew, who's this? 422 00:17:20,339 --> 00:17:22,616 Mom, Dad, set an extra place. 423 00:17:22,716 --> 00:17:24,285 This is my friend, Lola. 424 00:17:24,385 --> 00:17:26,454 I'm your girlfriend, you putz! 425 00:17:26,554 --> 00:17:28,330 You be respectful, you putz! 426 00:17:28,430 --> 00:17:30,374 He is a putz, isn't he? - Um, yeah. 427 00:17:30,474 --> 00:17:32,793 Andrew, why are you wearing Lola's sweatpants? 428 00:17:32,893 --> 00:17:35,880 Um... because it's the new thing. - I don't like new things! 429 00:17:35,980 --> 00:17:38,549 I stopped liking new things at Who Wants to be a Millionaire. 430 00:17:38,649 --> 00:17:41,052 Oh my God. I totally want to be a millionaire. 431 00:17:41,152 --> 00:17:42,386 No kidding! Me, too! 432 00:17:42,486 --> 00:17:45,014 Andrew, me and your dad are total twinsies. 433 00:17:45,114 --> 00:17:47,141 This is unbelievable. Who are you? 434 00:17:47,241 --> 00:17:51,353 It's crazy, 'cause me and my dad are like basically mortal enemies. 435 00:17:51,453 --> 00:17:53,064 You know who my mortal enemy is? 436 00:17:53,164 --> 00:17:55,024 Ashton Kutcher! - Jesus Christ. 437 00:17:55,124 --> 00:17:57,359 He thought he could replace Charlie Sheen. 438 00:17:57,459 --> 00:17:59,737 Please! Where's that show now? 439 00:17:59,837 --> 00:18:01,030 Off the air! 440 00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:02,865 And this one couldn't be happier about it. 441 00:18:02,965 --> 00:18:04,283 I had nothing to do with it! 442 00:18:04,383 --> 00:18:06,744 Oh, please! You love Kutcher. 443 00:18:06,844 --> 00:18:08,913 Walk me through how I did that. 444 00:18:09,013 --> 00:18:12,416 All I'm saying is that sorbet is bullshit, okay? 445 00:18:12,516 --> 00:18:14,001 Missy, is that Gena? 446 00:18:14,101 --> 00:18:15,920 Yes? - It's not some weird bird statue, right? 447 00:18:16,020 --> 00:18:18,339 Wow, you're really high. - Should I go talk to her? 448 00:18:18,439 --> 00:18:21,875 A hundred percent no. - Okay, wish me luck. 449 00:18:21,975 --> 00:18:25,012 Hey, Gena. - Hey, Nick. What are you doing here? 450 00:18:25,112 --> 00:18:27,598 I thought I wanted ice cream, but now I see you... 451 00:18:27,698 --> 00:18:30,184 ...and I think I think I want to say, like, I'm sorry? 452 00:18:30,284 --> 00:18:32,353 I'm listening. - We had this great connection, 453 00:18:32,453 --> 00:18:34,355 and then I was like, 'Do you like me? 454 00:18:34,455 --> 00:18:36,440 And if not, can't be friends. I'm Nick.' 455 00:18:36,540 --> 00:18:38,859 That's actually a really good impression of yourself. 456 00:18:38,959 --> 00:18:41,311 Thanks. I've been working on it a lot. - [giggling] 457 00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:42,571 Nick seems okay now. 458 00:18:42,671 --> 00:18:45,282 I'm glad he decided to be okay as soon as he saw Gena. 459 00:18:45,382 --> 00:18:47,409 [growls] Take two boobs and call me in the morning. 460 00:18:47,509 --> 00:18:50,037 I don't know if the Surgeon General would agree with that. 461 00:18:50,137 --> 00:18:51,831 Hey, Gena? Do you ever, like... 462 00:18:51,931 --> 00:18:53,791 Do you ever feel like, really alone? 463 00:18:53,891 --> 00:18:55,751 Uh... Sure, Nick. 464 00:18:55,851 --> 00:18:57,628 Yeah, sometimes. Are you okay? 465 00:18:57,728 --> 00:19:00,172 Why am I even asking? I mean, you have DeVon, so... 466 00:19:00,272 --> 00:19:02,091 Actually, I don't. - What? 467 00:19:02,191 --> 00:19:03,092 We broke up. 468 00:19:03,192 --> 00:19:04,501 You did? - Yeah. 469 00:19:04,601 --> 00:19:07,755 'Cause I think he still likes Devin. 470 00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:09,765 It's a call back to my voice. - Yeah, it was. 471 00:19:09,865 --> 00:19:12,810 You're so funny, and you have such kind eyes. 472 00:19:12,910 --> 00:19:14,019 You're like a white shit. 473 00:19:14,119 --> 00:19:16,021 Excuse me? - Oh, nothing. 474 00:19:16,121 --> 00:19:17,898 Can we please just be friends again? 475 00:19:17,998 --> 00:19:19,859 Yeah, I'd like that. - Great. 476 00:19:19,959 --> 00:19:24,280 So anyway, I think I'm almost for sure having a heart attack right now... 477 00:19:24,380 --> 00:19:27,324 ...and I'm going to sprint to the hospital. - Bye! 478 00:19:27,424 --> 00:19:34,819 Yeah, I'll have two scoops of that white shit he was talking about. 479 00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:40,504 [chuckles] It's good. 480 00:19:40,604 --> 00:19:42,840 It's a family recipe. Cream of onion. 481 00:19:42,940 --> 00:19:45,042 It's saltless, 'cause I hate salt. 482 00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:47,428 I think it's an overrated spice. - Ew, me too. 483 00:19:47,528 --> 00:19:50,347 It tastes like the sea, and it's in everything! 484 00:19:50,447 --> 00:19:51,924 [sighs] 485 00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:54,685 Hi there, my little Drew-Drew-train. 486 00:19:54,785 --> 00:19:57,513 It's me, Mo-la. 487 00:19:57,613 --> 00:20:00,849 Oh! What the fuck is happening? - Remember when we, like, 488 00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:03,360 rubbed fronts earlier today, baby? 489 00:20:03,460 --> 00:20:04,445 Oh, no... 490 00:20:04,545 --> 00:20:06,405 Wake up, Maurice. - [snoring] 491 00:20:06,505 --> 00:20:08,616 Andrew wants another kiss, 492 00:20:08,716 --> 00:20:12,119 and he can't do that without his beloved Hormone Monster. 493 00:20:12,219 --> 00:20:13,537 [Shadow Wizard grunts] - [gasps] 494 00:20:13,637 --> 00:20:15,572 What the hell is going on? 495 00:20:15,672 --> 00:20:17,708 I believe Andrew's in love. 496 00:20:17,808 --> 00:20:20,544 How about to make your own soup for Mo-la? 497 00:20:20,644 --> 00:20:25,132 A little cream of undies? It's a family recipe. 498 00:20:25,232 --> 00:20:26,834 Jesus, Andrew. Look at us. 499 00:20:26,934 --> 00:20:28,427 We're both in Lola's sweatpants. 500 00:20:28,527 --> 00:20:30,596 I'm drugged up, you're about to fuck your dad. 501 00:20:30,696 --> 00:20:32,640 We've hit rock bottom, brother. - He's right. 502 00:20:32,740 --> 00:20:34,558 This here, this right here... 503 00:20:34,658 --> 00:20:37,719 This has to end now. 504 00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:40,731 Lola, I need to talk to you outside. - Uh-oh! 505 00:20:40,831 --> 00:20:42,858 You wanna get your little butt grabbed again? 506 00:20:42,958 --> 00:20:45,986 No offense, but your son's a total perv. 507 00:20:46,086 --> 00:20:47,446 [door opens] - Tell me about it! 508 00:20:47,546 --> 00:20:50,065 I don't know what she sees in him. 509 00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:52,276 EMERGENCY ROOM... 510 00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:55,829 Oh! Oh my God. - Oh! I know you. 511 00:20:55,929 --> 00:20:57,748 I held you when you were a baby. 512 00:20:57,848 --> 00:21:00,251 I'm sorry sir, but I don't think that's true. 513 00:21:00,351 --> 00:21:01,660 [screams] 514 00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:03,337 Oh, Judd. Jesus! 515 00:21:03,437 --> 00:21:05,798 What are you doing here? What happened your hand? 516 00:21:05,898 --> 00:21:07,841 I was training a battalion of raccoons, 517 00:21:07,941 --> 00:21:10,928 and I pushed them a little too hard. What are you doing here, numb-nuts? 518 00:21:11,028 --> 00:21:14,390 I ate a weed gummy with Jesse, and I think I'm having a heart attack. 519 00:21:14,490 --> 00:21:16,267 You're not having a heart attack. You're just stoned. 520 00:21:16,367 --> 00:21:18,477 No one's ever died from pot. - Thank God. 521 00:21:18,577 --> 00:21:20,104 Come on, you little pecker. I'll take you home. 522 00:21:20,204 --> 00:21:22,648 What do I tell Mom and Dad? - Jack shit. 523 00:21:22,748 --> 00:21:24,483 We just gotta sober you up. - How? 524 00:21:24,583 --> 00:21:26,694 It's simple. I drive you home at 100 miles an hour. 525 00:21:26,794 --> 00:21:28,862 Does it have to be that fast? - Yes. 526 00:21:28,962 --> 00:21:31,407 You can't wear seat belt. - [squeaks, growls]... 527 00:21:31,507 --> 00:21:33,734 ...[engine starts] 528 00:21:33,834 --> 00:21:35,777 Asshole! 529 00:21:35,877 --> 00:21:37,913 Jesse! - Where were you? it's after nine. 530 00:21:38,013 --> 00:21:39,623 We were at Missy's house. 531 00:21:39,723 --> 00:21:42,001 We had to wait for the Ezekiel bread to rise. 532 00:21:42,101 --> 00:21:44,586 It's an ancient grain. - Uh-huh. Look at me. 533 00:21:44,686 --> 00:21:46,839 Your eyes are very red. Are you feeling okay? 534 00:21:46,939 --> 00:21:49,216 Yeah. I'm just kinda tired. - You're stoned. 535 00:21:49,316 --> 00:21:51,927 [giggles] What? No way. - Don't lie to me. 536 00:21:52,027 --> 00:21:54,838 I know what stoned looks like. Come here. 537 00:21:54,938 --> 00:21:56,557 See how my pupils are dilating with the light, 538 00:21:56,657 --> 00:21:58,058 but yours aren't? You're high. 539 00:21:58,158 --> 00:22:00,352 Oh, shit. My gummies. - What? 540 00:22:00,452 --> 00:22:02,396 I... I'm missing some of my edibles. 541 00:22:02,496 --> 00:22:04,523 At first I thought maybe I forgot I ate them, but--... 542 00:22:04,623 --> 00:22:06,567 Jesus-- - I took them, okay? 543 00:22:06,667 --> 00:22:07,943 It's not a big deal. - Wow, Greg. 544 00:22:08,043 --> 00:22:11,030 Who could've possibly given her the impression that it's not a big deal? 545 00:22:11,130 --> 00:22:12,906 I'm sorry, Shannon-- - No, that's it! 546 00:22:13,006 --> 00:22:14,074 I didn't mean-- - You're done. 547 00:22:14,174 --> 00:22:16,910 It was an accident. - You're moving out tonight. 548 00:22:17,010 --> 00:22:18,871 No! - Jesse, go to your room. 549 00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:20,414 It's not dad's fault. 550 00:22:20,514 --> 00:22:23,250 He didn't do anything. I'm the one who got a high. 551 00:22:23,350 --> 00:22:25,544 No, honey. Your mother's right. 552 00:22:25,644 --> 00:22:27,621 This one's on me. - Dad... 553 00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:30,186 I'll get my stuff. 554 00:22:31,183 --> 00:22:32,760 Oh, no! 555 00:22:32,860 --> 00:22:35,846 Lola, we've had a very special day together, 556 00:22:35,946 --> 00:22:39,800 but I think perhaps we'd be better off as friends? 557 00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:41,602 Wait, hold on. What? 558 00:22:41,702 --> 00:22:43,729 Are you breaking up with me? 559 00:22:43,829 --> 00:22:45,189 Don't think of it that way. 560 00:22:45,289 --> 00:22:48,817 I thought we were genuinely, like, a good couple. 561 00:22:48,917 --> 00:22:50,194 No Lola, don't cry. 562 00:22:50,294 --> 00:22:52,738 But you're weak and boring, 563 00:22:52,838 --> 00:22:54,740 and, like, a nobody! 564 00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:58,535 What does it mean that even you don't want to be with me? 565 00:22:58,635 --> 00:23:01,121 Let's not ask ourselves these hard questions, 566 00:23:01,221 --> 00:23:04,333 but I really do hope we can be friends. - [growls] 567 00:23:04,433 --> 00:23:06,668 Okay, Lola. You're hurting me. 568 00:23:06,768 --> 00:23:10,047 You sleezeball! I rubbed fronts with you, 569 00:23:10,147 --> 00:23:13,175 and then you just, like, dump me like a dump truck. 570 00:23:13,275 --> 00:23:15,344 Oh, God, you're so strong. 571 00:23:15,444 --> 00:23:18,055 I thought you were a good guy like Dr. Phil, 572 00:23:18,155 --> 00:23:21,016 but you're a bad guy like Dr. Oz! 573 00:23:21,116 --> 00:23:24,636 Dr. Oz is a-- - [bones snapping] 574 00:23:24,736 --> 00:23:28,023 What did Dr. Oz do that was bad? I never heard. 575 00:23:28,123 --> 00:23:30,359 Give me back my vanity sweats. 576 00:23:30,459 --> 00:23:33,112 I can't. I think you broke my wrist. 577 00:23:33,212 --> 00:23:37,316 Fine! I'll do it myself, Andrew. 578 00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:39,368 They're caught on the shoes. 579 00:23:39,468 --> 00:23:40,744 [grunts] 580 00:23:40,844 --> 00:23:43,539 Please. Please just take them. Take the shoes! 581 00:23:43,639 --> 00:23:48,618 I can't believe you stole my sweats on top of everything else! 582 00:23:48,718 --> 00:23:50,037 Oh! 583 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:52,381 We're free. It's finally over. 584 00:23:52,481 --> 00:23:54,946 [groaning] My wrist is broken! 585 00:23:54,983 --> 00:23:58,220 Andrew! Where'd you put the large scissors? 586 00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,639 We are so glad you're okay, Nickie. 587 00:24:00,739 --> 00:24:03,308 You're lucky Judd was around when you sneezed into that wasp's nest. 588 00:24:03,408 --> 00:24:04,726 What a good big brother. 589 00:24:04,826 --> 00:24:07,312 I'm mesmerized by you, Judd. - Nope. 590 00:24:07,412 --> 00:24:10,065 I get it. Not everyone's a cuddle-bug like me. 591 00:24:10,165 --> 00:24:11,984 Sleep tight, Nickie. - Sleep tight, Nick-Nick. 592 00:24:12,084 --> 00:24:12,985 Hey, Judd? - Yeah? 593 00:24:13,085 --> 00:24:14,528 Thanks for taking care of me. 594 00:24:14,628 --> 00:24:17,072 I thought I was alone, but then then you were there. 595 00:24:17,172 --> 00:24:19,241 No big deal. You're never alone, buddy. 596 00:24:19,341 --> 00:24:22,744 Like I said, I was training a battalion of raccoons... 597 00:24:22,844 --> 00:24:27,574 ...so that you'd never be alone again. - What? 598 00:24:27,674 --> 00:24:30,961 Hey guys... He's the garbage! 599 00:24:31,061 --> 00:24:32,546 [evil laughter]... 600 00:24:32,646 --> 00:24:34,256 ...[raccoons growling]... 601 00:24:34,356 --> 00:24:35,582 ...[Nick] Judd? 602 00:24:35,682 --> 00:24:37,259 Judd! 603 00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:39,961 [screaming]... 604 00:24:40,061 --> 00:24:45,331 ...[car door opens]... 605 00:24:50,363 --> 00:24:52,682 ...[Shadow Wizard] Was it worth it, Jesse? - [gasps]... 606 00:24:52,782 --> 00:24:55,527 Just to get hella faded? - No. 607 00:24:55,627 --> 00:25:00,282 Your sweet sad father thought he was going to win your mother back. 608 00:25:00,382 --> 00:25:02,201 Do you think that'd happen now? - No. 609 00:25:02,301 --> 00:25:03,235 Yes... 610 00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:07,164 It appears those good old days are gone forever. 611 00:25:07,264 --> 00:25:09,533 Oh! They look so happy. 612 00:25:09,633 --> 00:25:11,627 [Shame Wizard] They do. What a shame. 613 00:25:11,727 --> 00:25:13,003 [Jesse] I came along... 614 00:25:13,103 --> 00:25:15,047 I never should have been born. 615 00:25:15,147 --> 00:25:16,882 Oh! Now that's interesting. 616 00:25:16,982 --> 00:25:18,884 [crying] This whole thing is my fault. 617 00:25:18,984 --> 00:25:19,927 Oh, yes. 618 00:25:20,027 --> 00:25:22,888 Also, you should have been more aggressive... 619 00:25:22,988 --> 00:25:25,474 ...volunteering for Hillary Clinton. 620 00:25:25,574 --> 00:25:27,884 If you made a few more phone calls... 621 00:25:27,984 --> 00:25:29,436 Who knows. - [sighs] 622 00:25:29,536 --> 00:25:30,846 It's true. 623 00:25:30,946 --> 00:25:32,946 It's so true. 624 00:26:12,696 --> 00:26:15,586 SDH Created by: Arvind Vishwakarma