[gentle piano music]
[Celeste clears throat]
[Celeste sighing]
[Celeste Speaking] Okay, right.
This is what I'm gonna do.
Practice.
The unbearable night, the night building that washes water,
the night wind that sounds like trapped radiator spirits.
The night red light mill.
[gentle piano music]
And what's that other French surrealist writer called?
Paul Eluard?
Or is it Elua?
Do you pronounce the d?
E-L-U-A.
The night full of ship's tears,
the night window, the pains.
Ah shit!
Thought I edited that line out.
[gentle piano music]
The night full of ship's tears,
and the mystery that calls you old fashioned.
The water you had planned under the ground,
to save a generation.
The night walls that shudder flowers,
the equal distances from arms and closed eyes.
And the gardens that make a city wide.
Yeah, it's definitely the one I'm gonna read to him first.
[Celeste sighs]
Okay, here we go.
You can do it.
Just think of them on the toilet.
[Celeste footsteps approaching]
Oh, and remember to read the poems slowly.
And make eye contact.
Okay, breathe.
[Celeste sighs]
[paper rustling]
[phone ringing]
Fitzer radio group
Submissions?
Yeah, well actually I don't deal with those.
Okay, when did you send that?
And the title was?
"Think Fast, The Future is a Rapid Dog."
No.
Well, I think I might have remembered that one.
[chuckles]
No, okay, all right thank you very much.
[hangs up the phone]
[sighing]
Celeste
Oh, Jonathan.
Hi.
Tea?
Oh, ahhh no, I'm fine, thank you.
So, have you got something to show me?
Such an honor.
Oh.
Just let me.
-And there was... -Aha, mmmh.
Ooh and there was...
No no ahah.
You know, Celeste my father left us,
it was just me, my mom and my little brother.
We only started speaking last year.
Oh no, my father didn't leave us
he's just having a break.
This book is more of an ode to him than a revenge book
if you know what I mean.
Well, I guess it's a universal feeling.
Loss, longing.
Maybe I could read you one.
No, I have to read poetry into myself
in my own private space.
"Hurt by Paradise."
I like it.
Most of these poems are like memories
that have haunted me in some way.
You know, people expect you to have hate
if someone just leaves without dying, but I don't.
I get it...
Well, I'm sure what you've written is impactful.
There are little boys and girls everywhere
in the same position coming of age, so important.
But it's not gonna sell.
Ooh
Is just so hard to get a serious poet's name
to stick in people's heads.
I mean, unless they die in some tragic way.
Look at Sylvia Plath.
A genius her whole life and practically ignored,
until she stuck her head in the oven.
Do you think Ted didn't try hard
to push Sylvia when she was alive.
He knew she was great.
I bet he raved about her at feybar, cheese and wine parties
all over Fitzrovia.
Just one measly collection
was all that was published in her lifetime.
No one gave a shit.
Then one sultry, obituary photo in the Times
and bang, Ariel and the Bell Jar.
Which makes me think your next move
should be adapting this into a novel.
But it's perfect.
It's like if I remove one word
the whole thing would collapse.
You know that Emma Morris book,
has been translated into 30 different languages,
and the rights have been bought to be made into a movie.
She's made millions.
You could always do poetry on the side.
She's in the top 10 international bestsellers list now.
Publishers are struggling.
We all are.
I can barely afford my children's school fees.
The middle class has gone.
Look, I really do admire your determination.
Why don't you, think about what I said and keep in touch.
How does that sound?
Harriet Toodie on line two.
[gentleman Speaking] Aah, great,
just finishing here.
Yeah, well I must dash, I've actually got a meeting.
Been speaking to a couple of publishers directly.
There really is a new revolution of writers and poets
who just, you know, aren't afraid to put it out there.
Exactly.
Oh, I better go.
-Okay. -Okay.
It's been really inspiring.
Thanks.
I truly admire your spirit.
Right.
[laughs]
There you are.
Yes, we have some news.
[Celeste] That's so patronizing.
Why don't we just re-work it into a novel?
Re-work it into a bunch of lies.
Think I'm conformist.
"Yeah yeah, have you hear of Emma Morris?
Emma Morris."
No I've not heard of Emma Morris.
[soft piano music]
[phone ringing]
Hi, dad it's Celeste.
Wait do I say dad?
[womans voice] Hello.
Fuck this is useless
Never gonna find him.
[phone ringing]
[door knocking]
Come in, it's open.
Hey Jimmy?
Hey.
Hi.
[soft piano music]
Had the worst day, Jimmy slept all morning.
So I managed to get some reading done in the library
but then he woke up in the worst mood.
He threw everything on the floor.
Oh, and you owe me another 12 pounds.
It started raining and he didn't have his rain coat,
so I got him this one, from the charity shop over the road.
All right, that's fine.
Let me just have a...
Is it okay if I pay you Friday?
♪ warm as the setting sun... ♪
Everything lives unearthed.
Tiny cups and scissors hung over.
Lilly's in heaven, marching in glass, on the table.
Our child arranging the sky.
Sleeping between the doorway, blue garments.
An ocean on the bedroom floor.
Your scent a kind of black under heaven,
all raging and soft, breaking the tracks of summer.
A chapel in the fourth wall.
Always lit up and nursing.
[soft music]
♪ Warm as the setting sun... ♪
We barely notice the ceiling falling onto our bed.
Emptying out the aerial stars,
that have trapped our whole lives till now.
Walked with us through hysteria,
and trees made in the empty muse.
We live in one room, the BT Tower our lighthouse.
We have become two mothers.
♪ From the pouring rain. ♪
[dramatic music]
[upbeat music]
[Celeste] Can I just read you these four lines?
Just feel like, they really explain the world,
Jimmy is gonna have to live in.
Just four lines.
God is bored of us now.
She sides with the animals and the weather,
and they watch on digital alien rampage,
with cool, sad eyes.
What do you think?
Yeah.
Yeah, it's really, what's that word?
I could have paid these
if I got accepted onto that medical trial.
They tried to give me the flu but apparently I'm immune.
Do you think it's mad.
I've been looking at all the Blackwoods in the phone book
to find my father again.
These are the ones I could find.
He left when I was five.
I mean the mad thing is I don't even know
what he looks like now.
Actually, I've got this old picture of him.
Wow.
If it helps, I could pretend to be you on the phone.
I've always been really good at voices.
I could just pick up the phone and be like,
Hi yah its Celeste.
No no no, I would never say hi yah.
You are such a snob.
Oh now it gets tense.
[chattering]
Do you think about those papooses from to go?
Yeah you sweat it from here.
Yes
[dramatic upbeat music]
It's raining.
I love your dress, pink is my favorite color.
My entire wardrobe is black.
Oh my god, if was that woman, I'm mental.
Grabala grabala.
What's that?
Grabala.
What?
That was a grabala.
The night building which washes water.
The night wind, which sounds like trapped radiator spirits.
-The red light mill... -Do you mind,
can we hold it off I need to kinda go.
Can we do it tomorrow?
♪ Who ate my crispy lettuce, ♪
♪ Who, ♪
♪ But who, but who put it on my plate, but who but who. ♪
♪ A slimy slug, ♪
♪ A slimy a slimy slug. ♪
No, I think its fine.
I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's son.
♪ Macaroni macaroni cheese. ♪
♪ Cheese. ♪
I think you can stop now.
[soft music]
looks quite good.
Bit of tree.
[paper ripping]
[writing]
[Woman] Never know if they read them anyway.
I'll send it again.
[soft music]
Just do that.
Hi.
You don't have to be here all the time I'm here, you know.
I don't wanna put it in there.
Darling that's what's for.
You have to put the mail here.
I did it once before it didn't get there.
Can I just put it in your bag?
No that's my bag.
I don't want to put it in there.
I just, put it with the others.
Give it to me.
-Yeah? -Yeah.
In the bag.
There we go.
I'll see you next week.
I didn't know, you know I did fucking Brexit.
You know the Brexit?
Yeah.
I don't know how long i gonna be here.
-Bye. -None of us do.
Bye.
[gentle piano music]
[Celeste] How can I owe her 400 pounds?
She only looks after him few hours a week.
[gentle piano music]
[door shuts]
I brought your notes.
Mine always has the hair always rubs.
Oh, you've got such beautiful hands.
I tried to pretend I was dyslexic,
so I could get the free laptop.
They called me out when I spelled substantiation right.
By the way, there's a party next week, you should come.
Ooh yeah great.
Can I bring my baby?
[chuckles]
Poetry should challenge the form.
It should challenged the world like Sylvia Plath.
Not just regurgitate this self affirmation rubbish.
I just thought, fuck it, I'm gonna write my own book.
Yeah, It's all about breaking boundaries.
For me it was first time I went down on a woman.
What was it like?
It was terrible, but it felt so right.
I spent hours constructing witty
and sensitive sonnets to Vanessa.
And then would send them like they were spontaneous texts.
No wonder she ran for the hills.
I'm sure she wasn't running, I'm sure she was scared.
No no no she was sprinting.
[Woman] Hi, Aah baby.
Hey.
[kissing]
-Hi. -Hi.
-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you.
I'm Celeste.
[women chattering]
It's so nice to see people in love.
Awww are we in love?
[chuckles]
Stop it you're gonna make me blush.
[gentle piano music]
We found out that Leonard Cohen died this morning,
and the world was reminded of poetry.
Pale domes of white light, down the Tottenham court road.
Selfies everywhere.
Down the Tottenham Court road,
all trapped up in tree light.
Sad in a way,
that we only look back on people's work when they die.
Do you think, you should try and live your life,
so you have an exciting obituary?
I mean, what does it matter.
You're dead.
Wait, that could be him.
[gentle piano music]
This is ridiculous.
I'm actually turning into a lunatic.
No he looks far too young.
Plus would my father, wear a trilby?
This is getting weird now.
I feel like I'm following a private detective.
Anyway, where was I?
[door knocking]
[piano playing]
Hi.
Hi Jimmy?
Hi.
Did he have his breakfast already?
He had it about six o'clock this morning,
so he'll probably be hungry quite soon.
Okay, I'm gonna leave you.
All right, I'll see you at 5:30
-Yeah. -Okay.
Have a good one.
[baby crying]
Bye.
I'll be back soon.
I love you.
[baby whining]
They've got rose gardens here.
Where'd she move to.
It's like a country club.
[gentle piano music]
Look at all these trees.
It's like Mary Poppins.
[Woman] Mayonnaise with that,
you're disgusting.
Put it back in the fridge.
Wait wait wait, I'm not done with it.
[grunts] She's so anal.
You know, I just got off the phone with mom.
She's been complaining about her art show again,
saying that they've been plotting to do meetings
behind her back.
God she's so ridiculous.
There's always some kind of like conspiracy with her.
Anyway, I've been thinking
and me and Steven want to put you and Jimmy
on our private health insurance.
Health insurance?
Isn't that what the NHS is for.
But you never know what might happen.
And like, I've got all these joint problems already.
You know, from the ballet.
[chuckles]
Okay, morbid Maude.
I've told you before don't ever call me that again.
What?
Morbid Maude.
She knows I love morbid people.
[dog panting]
Oh, I love this.
Oh not that one.
I didn't mean to put that one in there, leave that one out.
What's this?
This one's so romantic.
I can't believe you don't get lonely.
No, I do sometimes.
I mean, you like being alone.
You're like mum, I need someone.
If anything I am like dad.
What?
A self obsessed hypocrite.
I mean, every time I try and be myself,
I just genuinely don't know what happens.
English boys are so repressed.
I would be happy if Jimmy cried
over the beauty of a single Rose.
I used to hate dating.
Never had the nerve for it.
Maybe I'm a psychopath.
You should speak to Steven about it.
He'd love that.
Oh, we don't want him knowing all our family secrets though.
[Steven] Hello.
Hi.
How are you?
Fine thank you.
Stop
Oh she doesn't mind, does she?
How are you Celeste?
Don't know.
Sorry, we don't have cups on the floor.
Oh sorry.
No its good.
Just not the wood or the rug or the rug for cup.
[laughs]
-No, no, its fine its fine. -God he's so anal.
The dogs and everything's fine.
That's right.
Did you get the invitation to my book launch?
No.
Right, well, we're gonna do it at Waterstones,
in High street Ken.
-Oh cool. -Yeah it's gonna be good.
Should be very cool, very exciting.
So what's the title again?
"How to be Happy in the Modern World."
You'd be amazed at how many people struggle
to find happiness with someone honestly.
Let alone themselves right.
[laughs]
You should do some Work experience with Steven.
Yeah, no, sure, we'd squeeze you
into a corner for a couple of hours.
We'd find your space to, you know, do some scribbling.
But the good thing that you'd have
with coming in with us just for a couple of hours,
is not to put too fine a point on it.
But we do the grown up side, you know
we do the business end and we do the creative end.
And it's the kind of realism sometimes
of putting those two cogs together and seeing how they work.
It's all well and good, you know great stuff
that you're conjuring up there.
But we need to figure a way to get it to our readership,
to get it to our target audience,
which is often you know, the actual,
that's the hard stuff.
That's the bread and butter work.
So from that perspective
I think it would be invaluable to be honest
for you to come in with us for a day.
And as long as you're all right with alpha males
which you all know what it's like.
Do you think you'd be up for that?
To be honest, you know, you can't really teach poetry.
You can't really teach pain.
It's just something you just can't, you know
it's you either understand the other world or you don't.
I've been thinking we should get your keys cuts to our flat.
That's a nice idea.
I'll give you a spare to mine.
Then if he's driving you mad,
you can just drop him up in my flat,
in the middle of the night.
Then we already will be like
a kind of dysfunctional little family.
I actually don't think you need a man
to look after a child.
But you definitely need two women.
Oh yeah.
[child screaming]
[child crying]
Oh sorry.
-[child crying] -Are you okay now?
[child crying]
I think some people are just afraid of poetry maybe.
I don't know, every time I tell anyone I'm a poet
they just sort of think you're really pretentious.
[Woman] Like you can afford to do it on the side.
I think the English used to see it
as a hobby or something,
like gardening or I don't know, making soup.
[chuckling]
I did do this TV advert once,
it was meant to be thousands.
Never came through.
Nothing?
Just snacks.
It was for a biscuit brand.
Wow.
[Woman] They duped me.
Anything good?
A few toilet rolls, toothpaste, some sunscreen.
Yeah.
Some stickers for Jimmy.
Can we do it tomorrow?
No no no, wait, this is a good bit.
The night wind that sounds like trapped radiator spirits.
Trapped radiator spirits.
The night building that pains,
the night red light mill.
I've really gotta go.
Jimmy loves it.
Don't you Jimmy?
♪ Goodnight, goodnight. ♪
Actually, can I get that eight pounds
you owe me for nappies.
Oh yeah, sure.
A second.
[fumbling keys]
Don't worry actually give it to me tomorrow.
[soft music]
♪ Don't waste your life Claire, ♪
♪ don't waste your life Claire, ♪
♪ don't waste the things that you might do, ♪
♪ and I love you so. ♪
♪ Don't waste your bus fare, ♪
♪ don't waste your bus fare, ♪
♪ don't waste the places you might go ♪
♪ and I want you now. ♪
♪ There's a cold tune, in my heart. ♪
I literary haven't seen you in ages, you look amazing.
Where is your coat from?
I wasn't gonna come tonight, I'm so tired.
Do you have any tobacco, i really want some.
Does anyone have any tobacco?
I wanted to ask you what it's like being a mother.
Why are you dressed as a pilot?
I am a pilot.
Duchamp is a lie.
He was a master of irony.
Everything I make has a connection to politics.
There is no connection to politics and Duchamp.
What I hear about people
is they get bored of magic so easily.
It's all about the masterful gesture.
You're traveling through the sky at 500 miles an hour,
chasing the sunset from London to New York.
And all you can do is complain about the chicken Curry.
I mean, you're a mammal
eating the soul of a dead bird in the sky,
up there in the space of angels.
They have no humility.
They've got no sense of magic and no sense of perspective.
Nonsense.
The man was a genius.
He invented conceptual art.
And I've heard a lot of people compare my work to Duchamp.
It's about the sentence, the object
and the title make together.
I sold one to George Michael.
I see a lot up there, you know.
You get amazing views of the stars at dusk and Dawn.
Yeah.
One of the perks of my job.
It's incredible.
Do you wanna get a drink?
I've ruined my forehead and everything.
I looked into getting fillers once.
You can get them really cheap in Austria.
What do you think?
Remember this one director,
he told me my face was too ad hoc.
I'm excited about meeting Roman though.
Shall we take a photo?
Hold it.
[slow music]
My father, a continual electrical trail,
where love comes to retire.
Where love comes to suspend.
A bewitched symbol, a gentle stage.
A boat and bellowing mines.
And on the walk home, the child behind you
turns on all the lights.
All your ruins move closer to my ruins,
a whole country.
And we begin, you by the door
unable to understand the frantic English.
The Half cut wood, you dream to make a doll's house,
where we could live.
But we can't go backwards.
We can't step into the same river twice.
[soft music]
I think this is the first summer of the apocalypse.
Do you feel that?
Desert wind.
I wanna tell you something actually.
I'm seeing someone, he's called Roman, he's a writer.
What?
It's been a year.
How do I not know about this?
We write, every night.
Is he a good kisser?
Well, actually it's an online thing.
So you haven't actually met?
No.
Every night for a year though, that's a deep connection.
I think it's the best relationship I've ever had.
I guess is kind of modern.
Online.
[piano playing]
Oh I knew it.
A winner is just a loser who tried one more time.
Ah, where is it, where is it, where is it.
[flipping papers]
Hero itself can blot heroes virtue.
what man was, he talked about you last night.
Out your window, the 12th and the last one.
Now, if you are a maid answer this.
I talked with no man at that hour, my Lord.
Why?
You are no maiden.
[soft music playing]
Celeste, I'm coming down, stay there!
It's this unhinged middle-aged woman
and X show girl, having a second life.
She's had a nervous breakdown.
She hooks up with this cult almost, radical thinkers.
They run a commune from her flat in Highgate.
I mean it's brilliant.
Oh my God Its made for you.
It means I need you to come back early on Monday though.
Oh yeah, that's fine I'll be back in time.
Don't worry.
Okay Great.
Can I read you the monologue for the audition?
I'm no fool.
I can be a tad dopey though.
Dopiness is first, and then we have the list.
Wave, headstrong, self-centered, fat,
ugly, tactless, mean and cruel and I am also a liar.
[piano playing]
[wind blowing]
[audio from the lift]
Hi.
Oh, hi am in here.
Jimmy go in there.
Jimmy's here.
Darling, you help me a bit,
I've just about done a bit.
Just a little bit at the back.
Just a second.
Darling just fit.
I just put it down.
Just there for God's sake.
I think towards the top.
-Have you got enough there? -I think you're done mum.
Yeah.
Put it down for God's sake.
Hideous.
[Celeste] Do you have anything to snack on?
I can hardly afford to feed myself, you as well.
Well, we haven't eaten together in ages have we.
The amount of meals I've cooked for you.
Have you been going around telling everyone how awful I am.
Sure Mom.
That's exactly what I've been doing.
Exactly.
Just so feed up, people just taking pictures of anything.
What do you mean?
Oh.
No privacy, I can't do anything without someone
sneakily puting pictures of me on the internet.
Oh, mum not this again.
Well, that's why I didn't want anyone coming over.
Okay.
Well what about me and Jimmy?
You and Jimmy, well you are not people are you?
Not you, that other lot
that you bring over here.
Wafting in here with all their bloody frizzy hair.
That one, you know.
Oh Stella.
Oh Stella yeah, that one.
Came in here and ate everything in my fridge.
It's not frizzy, it's just big.
Oh anyway, she's too fat.
Okay Mom, why don't we go out for a nice walk?
Why would I want to go for a walk?
For Christ's sake I've just done my hair,
I'm not going out like some crazed mother.
Well, it might be nice
for you to spend some time with Jimmy,
you are his grandma.
I've told you do not.
Not to call you grandma.
I don't want to be called grandma you know.
God's sake, do you know how awful it is being a grandma?
Grandma.
And you've got your little Jimmy calling me nanny.
I don't want to be called nanny.
Well-
I don't know what you're laughing for,
its not even bloody funny.
What do you want to be called I've asked you this before.
I don't know but I don't want to be called nanny, nanny.
Okay, Well, why don't we just call-
Yes.
Elly or something.
Granny Elly.
No no no, granny bloody,
I just said, I don't want to...
That's even worse than nanny, granny.
Christ's sake.
I'm gonna see if he's awake.
Go lie down that's right, Ellie would be nice.
Not bloody nanny.
[piano playing]
How's that going?
I don't know maybe, two more weeks.
How about yours?
I don't know mine still hasn't grown back since last time.
Let me take a look.
You're lucky.
Are you gonna tell people what they really are?
This is our DNA our family history,
our family's material toenails.
Joseph boys had to apologize for using that.
What about dad?
He's half of me.
Oh shit I mean its a lie.
I mean, one minute it's a gallery,
the next its a blood art cafe.
He misspelled my name on Twitter.
Can you believe that?
[breaths in]
You can't rely on anyone.
And you know it's not very feminist
to keep banging on about your absent father.
Now what's been going on?
Well I submitted a couple of new poems
for a few literary prizes.
I might make some cash.
We can't just live off a prize,
I mean, most of those things are rigged anyway
just posh people's godsons.
You're not gonna win.
Mind you, if you do you get some cash.
I wouldn't mind going on a cruise.
On a cruise?
Where would you go?
Fantastic cruises now, all around the Caribbean.
God, I couldn't think of anything worse.
Oh, you're just not mature enough to get it darling.
I am mature.
I just don't wanna be stuck on a boat
with a bunch of idiots.
Are you depressed?
No.
Why do we think the angels are people,
and not just the sunlight
observing its place over the world.
Siren angel placement.
She was once the most beautiful woman in the world.
Her veins were made from sundials.
[piano playing]
This year, the Indian YMCA, has Christmas decorations.
All ropy.
A silvering choker, backed onto the corner,
of Fitzroy square.
Floating foreign light, like it too it has forgotten itself.
Still it stays open.
Ah for God sakes.
It stays open.
Actually he's a splitting image of my father.
He's got that intellect behind the eyes, always thinking.
[Celeste] Now where was I?
All that is free kills you now.
Wait, is that too dark?
All that is free kills you now.
My father-
[woman] Boys are terrorists.
Well yeah, it gets better.
All around London, annotates, the dead parties.
The insides of houses, a Greyhound runner.
And you stay beside me looking back up to me.
Asking about the sky and why we dream at night.
Your love is like a seashell, a rare pull in to paradise.
I'm still surprised by it.
[water running]
[piano playing]
dinner?
[piano playing]
Hey.
I've got a date with that pilot.
You don't mind baby sitting on Tuesday, do you?
No, Tuesday's fine.
As long as you can pay me this week,
I need the extra cash for the broadband upgrade.
My wifi signal reaches you upstairs doesn't it?
Yeah, I know.
But, me and Roman are really serious now,
so I need a serious wifi connection.
Oh.
I've gotta go I'll see you later.
-Bye. -Bye.
[door slams]
Piles of lands, with seesaw heads.
Unforgiving night.
I don't know if its any good.
[baby crying]
[soft music playing]
Is it Jeffrey Blackwood?
Blackwood, like a black wood, woodland.
Jeffery lives here?
I wanted to know if there was any association
with my father.
[Woman] Well, you don't know, he could be Spanish.
That's a good point, i'll ask.
Although, I don't feel like he is.
I sort of imagine a young David Attenborough type.
That's just crazy that you don't know.
You honestly learn so much about someone
from the way they write.
I think it's refreshing, It's not about looks.
I don't know,
I feel like you just have to get everything out
in the first meeting.
Everything out?
Like a business transaction.
No, I mean like, do everything, say everything,
and then you know, if it's worth pursuing or not.
[baby Mumbling]
There you go.
[brushing teeth]
[Celeste] Hi.
Hi,
nice to see you.
Nice to see you.
You came, I didn't think you'd reply to my texts actually.
Oh.
Just, it was a bit of a wild party,
I thought maybe you wouldn't remember much of it.
So well, Celeste.
Tell me about yourself.
Don't mention the poetry.
Just released a book about poetry about losing my father.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Oh no, he's not dead.
Pretty sure he lives in Finchley but that's another story.
Right.
That's your thing, poetry?
Yeah, well, people always, you know
go on about losing a parent.
You know when parents split up that's pain,
but for me, pain was childbirth.
Of course Ryan wasn't there to witness it.
He was on the ferry to Dover, no phone reception.
I mean, to be honest, it was a bit of a blessing.
It was more of a biological connection,
than a soul connection, if you know what I mean.
So you've got a child?
Hmm.
Oh.
-Just say something funny. -Oh, right.
-So where is the kid now? -I left him at home
with a bottle of champagne and a spliff.
Huh, funny.
Do you know what you'd like to order?
Actually, can you give us a few minutes please?
Okay.
Bit of a first for me this, if I'm honest.
Oh, is it the single mother thing?
No, it's not that it's coming back here.
This is the restaurant where my wife broke up with me.
I was away flying the Pacific and I come home
and she's been away in one of those silent retreat things.
She spent five days living
in a room with this 70 year old guy,
like sort of self-styled guru, dodgy, dodgy,
And that was it though, she moved out.
I mean she moved out the next week.
You guys ready to order?
Yeah I guess.
How does the carpaccio come?
Cold.
Well.
-I probably- -Here we are then I guess.
Yeah.
Well, I'm gonna, was the tube that way?
Ill get you in a cab. I should at least get you in a taxi
to make sure you get home safe.
Oh no there is no need, there is no need.
I feel better that way, its the least I can do I think.
Hold on.
There is one there I'll Just get it, I'll just get it.
I don't know if i have any cash.
Oh okay.
[engine roaring]
[car door slams]
Bye,
bye,
bye.
Excuse me, I'm really sorry, I don't have any money,
he put me in here.
[driver] That's alright darling.
Ahh thanks.
[driver] You gonna be all right?
Yeah am just gonna have to walk and get the tube.
Sorry.
[car door slams]
[piano playing]
[keyboard typing]
[piano playing]
[Celeste footsteps approaching]
[piano playing]
Hello?
Darling.
An angel.
You are divine.
Thanks.
Sit, sit.
Is this a good time?
I was expecting you.
[breathing in]
That'll be a fiver.
Oh yeah, sorry.
[clears throat]
I'm gonna need something precious,
something that's quite close to you.
Like a piece of jewelry or a photograph.
Its precious.
[breathing in and out]
I need you to focus on your life.
Think about the things that you want to know.
[humming]
It's your time.
Everything is coming to you.
Forget about the past, your world is changing.
This is you.
It is?
It has a big event coming up.
Something that you're looking forward to.
Yeah, I'm on my way now.
That's life changing.
You're on a stage,
the curtains haven't come up yet.
You're just hovering above the ground,
like being held, like by a piece of string.
But instead it is the power of true love
that holds you up there.
What's that noise?
What is that?
Jimmy.
Jimmy, Jimmy, yes Jimmy, yes that's a family.
Roman?
[bell rings]
[upbeat music]
So selfish, sabotaging my big day.
It's a bloody poetry thing.
[upbeat music]
shit, this way come on.
[baby crying]
Too late now.
Oh hi, am here for the audition.
[Woman Speaking] Hi, come on through.
[footsteps approaching]
[baby crying]
Oh hi.
Hi sorry can I help you?
Oh yeah.
I'm Stella Mansell, I'm here to audition for Gloria.
All right, well.
If you just pop your name down on here.
Do you normally bring your child to auditions?
Oh, he's not mine, I'm his baby sitter.
He had to be with his mom, but something came up.
He'll be alright though.
Okay.
Stella Manzell.
Mansell.
Yes, Okay.
If you just take this and take a seat.
Thanks so much.
Great.
Come on then.
[baby crying]
Lets go for a walk.
Maddie Shaw.
Yes.
Hi, thank you for coming in.
Nice to see you.
Thank you for coming to see us.
Hi, hi.
How are you doing?
Great.
Nice to see you.
Come in.
[woman laughing]
-[woman] Thank you. -[woman] Thanks so much
[woman] I really appreciate it.
Take care.
-[woman] See you again. -[woman] So nice to see you.
Bye.
Stella.
Yes.
Yeah, I'm-
[baby crying]
Am afraid we don't have time for you today.
[baby crying]
Well, we waited all this time.
That's all right we can do tomorrow.
3 p.m, is good.
Yeah, look, I think if I'm honest,
we found the right Gloria.
The right Gloria?
[baby crying]
Okay we're just gonna sit here then.
Oh, we'll wait here and they'll have to see us.
[baby crying]
oh my, I can't believe it.
[baby crying]
I'm sorry.
I am Stella.
Oh yes.
The part is cast, am sorry for wasting your afternoon,
but there is no really point for you to stay in here.
I'll just read you a few lines.
The part is taken.
I'm sorry.
Good night.
Lets go.
[door shuts]
Is that it?
Looks like it.
[piano playing]
[wind blowing]
[piano playing]
Hi, I was so worried.
[car engine roaring]
[Celeste] Post hearted and regretted.
We find you already fallen.
Autumn always kills me.
The trees, let go.
Silvering fierce.
The show is on the ground.
This sky is upturned.
London is no longer famous.
The children are buzzing fingertips.
A paper bag of tears named Diana.
I don't know how many times we've moved house,
to find a space for dreaming.
All of our old letters remain the downpour,
unable to disturb the living.
Ophelia is in the wind somewhere on the coast,
leaving the sand to announce its suffering.
The summer comes back to haunt us.
Abandoned crows, Bunhill Fields updated.
The remains of lovers, prepared like a porcelain dinner,
always promising and staggering.
[piano playing]
Money!
[piano playing]
[keyboard typing]
[piano playing]
[keyboard typing]
[piano playing]
[upbeat music]
[bell ringing]
Can I help you?
Hi, I made a reservation online, Mansell.
Online where?
dreamsleeps.com.
Welcome to the Walpole Bay Hotel, where dreams never die.
Travel far?
All my life.
Oh, you must be exhausted.
I am.
Mansell, reservation for two?
Yeah.
Where is the other person?
He's gonna be here later.
Is there a mini bar in the room?
No.
But you're welcomed to join me at any hour,
for a cocktail in the bar over there.
Thanks, maybe later.
Great expectations, I'll put you there.
I conceived my first child in that room and my second.
You're on the third floor.
Thanks.
Kettle and towels in the wardrobe.
Sea out the window.
And if you hear banging that's normal.
And you've got a full house tonight?
No, what makes you think that?
A sign outside.
Oh that.
I didn't feel like company this evening.
The trouble is with guests is that you can't pick 'em.
Thanks.
Oh, is there wifi?
No.
[knocking on the door]
[Celeste] Hey, it's us.
And we brought back your shoes.
[guitar playing]
[soft music playing]
[phone ringing]
It's not very feminist to leave everything for a man Jimmy.
[phone ringing]
Hi darling.
Hi mom.
You're not going to believe this,
but you know that art show,
they've only gone and told some charity
they can have a percentage of the sales.
I mean, I might as well give the art away.
I can't stand these people
that go around spreading their morality
onto bloody everything.
Mom, I'm really worried.
You know, Stella has gone missing.
What, the fat one.
No seriously.
She's gone off with some online man in Margate.
She hasn't even seen a picture of him.
Definitely a nutter. I mean actually, do you know what?
I was actually reading an article about this the other day
saying that if you talk to someone online
and they don't give you their picture,
hundred percent they're a psychopath.
I mean, bloody idiot.
A lot of these people who can't connect with society
they often do go under by the sea.
I mean, have you ever seen a sane Seagull?
Darling you there?
Oh, look, I've gotta go.
My programs are coming on and I just-
Okay bye.
[sighs]
Fuck.
[piano playing]
Hi.
Sweet or sour?
Sweet, and he'll have sour.
Great.
Are you from London?
No, I'm from Woking.
Where's Woking?
It's off the A3, honestly.
What's in those?
Cranberries.
For the cystitis.
Is that mine?
Looks nice.
Tastes like paradise, thanks so much.
You're meeting a friend?
My boyfriend.
Its our anniversary., one year together.
Congratulations.
I can feel the sexual tension, so exciting.
I was fanatically in love.
You guys you're so optimistic.
It's very nice of you to notice.
You're welcome.
Salute.
Can I ask you,
how far is that?
[piano playing]
Far!
Oh.
Its 15 minutes.
He's 15 minutes away!
Awww she's in love.
You don't wanna walk.
I'll get you a cab.
Thanks so much.
Hello, you're having your dinner?
Oh can Ron do it?
Thank you.
He's such a nice boy.
He'll be here in a sec.
Oh, thank you.
Come here.
You see those ducks?
Yeah.
Now, one of the first things I sold Estelle,
and always be in love.
Look at them, four years strong and look at them,
look at the eye, contact.
[man] ♪ I'm building things, and losing things, ♪
♪ finding things and seeing things. ♪
♪ The child in me is filled with glee, ♪
♪ I rub my eyes in mock surprise. ♪
♪ Ohhh I am bouncing the ball, ♪
♪ and chill It never comes back. ♪
♪ It twists and it swerves, until It never comes back. ♪
Roman.
Stella.
why didn't you come to the hotel?
Why couldn't I come to the hotel?
It's a good question.
But you know, I don't have visitors here.
Nobody visits me here and I don't visit other people.
I didn't think you were so serious about it.
I thought it was some kind of joke.
Would you like a drink?
I knew I had that. Got it as a gift for myself.
For you my dear.
Thanks.
No visitors?
You wrote me loads of emails,
saying about how your friends come over
and steal all your books.
Maybe not gonna write about this.
No, I don't write about real life.
Far too boring for me.
So everything you've written about-
No, it's just a way of letting off steam
that's all it is.
But it's a lie.
You know we're meeting now, right?
Were together now.
You could be anyone.
I think maybe I should call the police.
Did you say call the police?
Why would you want to do that babe?
Don't touch me.
Look what you've done.
You know you shouldn't be allowed
to write to people really.
I got fiber optic broadband for this.
Cost me a fortune.
Just shut up please.
Will you please just shut up
and let me salvage what I can from this.
Don't make it worse.
Your tongue is like a flame thrower.
No, because the real fucked up thing here,
Is that I'm the actor, I've given you nothing but truths.
And you're just a fraud, in a cabin.
And you young lady are just a young drunk from Camden.
I don't like actors.
I never ever liked actors.
They can never teach me anything.
I've got no respect for them.
They're all just puppets.
Bloody puppets.
But you know what?
And that's being kind.
I should win an Oscar for this performance.
Yeah, I agree.
But an Oscar for what, animation?
What was that program in the 90's with those puppets?
♪ I'll be holding you in my arm. ♪
♪ Love me tender, love me true. ♪
♪ It's the wonder of you, ♪
♪ all those precious things you do, ♪
♪ your blue suit you. ♪
♪ You're my one love, ♪
♪ and I want all the world to see, ♪
♪ that I love you, your in my dreams. ♪
[male voice] Do you need a room?
No, I'm looking for a friend.
She's gone off with a lunatic.
She was here, but she's gone.
Totally deluded.
She was insane.
So we put her in a cab, that was a while ago now.
And she left this.
What's in that?
She planning on killing him.
It's an oyster knife.
Do you know where she's gone, please?
I can ask the cabby.
Good luck.
Hello, Ron, its me.
You know the wiggy girl?
Can you take someone wherever she went.
Wiggy, yes.
Thank you darling.
Come as soon as you can.
[piano playing]
Shhh.
They're here again.
What?
Seagulls?
Yeah, It's that time of night they come every time.
Yeah, so romantic.
Listen to them.
[prrr prrr]
[khokhoo khokhoo]
That's the female pigeon wants the male pigeon
and she goes kookoo, like yeah yeah
but I can't hear you.
You have to go louder.
Go louder.
[kokoo]
[prrrr]
[kokoo]
[prrrr]
[kokoo]
[prrrr]
[kokoo]
[prrrr]
[kokoo]
Jesus Christ.
This is Roman.
Oh my God.
Dad?
Hi.
Okay, that's enough.
It really wasn't meant to happen like this.
I thought it would be a way to connect with you somehow.
But then, it just ran away with me
and it took on a life of its own
and it became something else.
I Googled your name one day and your mother came up.
Why did she have to be so intense?
Well, I only started writing to Stella
because I was looking for you online.
I'm really hot.
I need some air.
No don't go, please don't go.
Where are you going?
I love you.
You know, she's only intense because she cares.
She actually cares.
I mean, she was there for us.
You have to be there to love someone.
I mean where the hell were you?
[laughing]
[piano playing]
Are you okay?
Yeah.
I don't know, don't you just think it's sad
that we're here for such a small moment.
Made for each other, for all of this life.
And then suddenly that's it.
We should get breakfast, you know.
I think I need to call my mom first.
Maybe you should tell her,
I could have been your stepmother.
[laughing]
We could only laugh
and then get a restraining order against you.
I might change my hair
just think it's too big, you know?
Its good to have a signature look.
Maybe I'll just get a trim then.
I don't think you should change a thing.
Really?
Yeah.
I can spot you from anywhere.
Its genetic.
Oh I'm sure.
My moms the same.
She got a square as well?
Total square.
My mothers got more of a triangle.
The first together is the morning itself.
The marrying wish of two, the first dance with the grass
renewed like a child's clock.
The early light, unaware of the low hum
that entwines the mood of the air.
Strangely, worshiping in high memory cries.
And we remember the ghost better in the morning,
the rising light that is always a grace
on the backs of the things you love.
Scattered through the house like Lego.
The bed remains ancient and its ritual of worship.
A personal attack against strangers,
made up of all its own Trojan Wars
hung in literature and debated.
It is easy to believe
that it is a privilege to grow old in the morning.
And the age is young
and all that is above will remain immortal,
regardless of loneliness.
[upbeat music]
focus on a point.
♪ Don't waste your life Claire, ♪
♪ Don't waste the things that you might do, ♪
♪ And I love you so. ♪
♪ Don't waste your bus fare. ♪
♪ Don't waste the places you might go, ♪
♪ and I want you now. ♪
♪ There is a cold tune in my heart. ♪
♪ Don't waste your life Claire, ♪
♪ Don't waste the things that you might do, ♪
♪ And I love you so. ♪
♪ Don't waste your bus fare. ♪
♪ Don't waste the places you might go, ♪
♪ and I want you now. ♪
♪ There is a cold tune in my heart. ♪
♪ Don't waste your life Claire, ♪
♪ Don't waste the things that you might do, ♪
♪ And I love you so. ♪
♪ Don't waste your bus fare, ♪
♪ Don't waste the places you might go, ♪
♪ and I want you now. ♪
♪ There is a cold tune in my heart. ♪
♪ There is a could tune in my heart. ♪
[soft music]