- ♪ Rise of the ♪
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Rise of the ♪
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ♪
♪ Rising up against evil paint the city green ♪
♪ Raph is ready for a fight Leo's making a scene ♪
♪ Mikey's got mad skills Donnie rocks machines ♪
♪ With each other they discover ♪
♪ Their destiny and rise ♪
♪ Cowabunga ♪
♪ Rise of the ♪
♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
♪ Heroes in the half-shell Turtle power ♪
♪ Rise ♪
- Yes.
all: Whoa.
- Okay, rock-paper-scissors for the first slice.
Me and Mikey are up.
- It's funny how Raph always starts
against Mr. "Only Chooses Scissors."
Both: One, two, three...
- Scissors. - Rock.
- Oh, not again.
How do you do it?
- [laughs]
Huh?
Pizza slice gone. Which of you creepoids took it?
- [laughs] all: Huh?
[all screaming] - The table's eating our pizza!
[chewing]
- It's the chair!
[all grunt]
- Wait, pops?
- Mm. yes.
And so begins your next lesson.
- Let me guess.
How to starve your enemies to death?
- No. Today, you learn the art
of ninja stealth and invisibility,
the foundation of every great ninja.
Lights-off-jutsu.
- What? Ugh.
You couldn't have done this last week
when Mikey cooked Brussels sprouts?
- You must remain sleek and nimble,
so no weapons today.
After my lessons, you will be ready for a mission
inside Big Mama's Yokai Hotel.
- You know about Big Mama?
- I have heard stories.
Ninja invisibility lesson number one.
- Use your enemy's blind spots
to advance across the battlefield.
Be as light as a feather...
as quick as a really fast feather.
Move quickly and softly.
- Please, like you could possibly sneak up on--
hey, give me back my Tech-Bo...
And wallet. - [laughs]
Now, using your new skills, sneak up on me and attack.
- Here I come.
- Ninja tip. Do not announce attack.
- Roger that.
Watch me stick to the shadows, baby.
Lights-off-jutsu.
- Really?
You think you can turn off the sun?
No more fooling around.
- I'll show you fooling around.
"Light as a feather"-jutsu active.
[grunts]
[all yelling]
Uh-oh.
[all moaning]
Ugh.
- Boys, you are not kindergarteners.
Focus. Lesson five.
Blending into your environment.
[grunts]
- What? Where'd he go?
- We'll never find him.
- Yeah, he's way too smart
for all of us teenage turtles,
Right, my dudes?
- Tiniest brother is right.
He could be that pigeon,
or that moped,
or that trash pile.
all: Yeah!
- Well done, my sons.
You just beat up a big pile of garbage.
[all groaning]
It was me all along.
all: Whoa.
- Amazing. - What a disguise.
- Tricked by the master. - But you're not a turtle.
Oh, wow. - [sighs]
Maybe the only way to get through to you is fear.
I am sending you rodeo clowns on a mission right now.
You must sneak into Big Mama's
and grab the tags off her demon dog Gus.
If that vicious beast cannot get you to focus,
then nothing will.
Now go! - Yeah!
[all muttering]
- Ah, they will do very well.
Maybe they stopped for sundaes.
Oh, that's it.
A little fear never anyone.
[grunts]
A giant demon dog never hurt anyone, either.
I have sent my sons to their doom!
Don't worry, boys.
Help is on the way.
[grunts]
[laughs]
- High alert. Chip-chop, lads.
Everyone to their stations.
- High alert?
My boys. They have been discovered.
- Hey, you. Hold the elevator.
- Faster, stupid elevator. Faster.
- Let's go, let's go. High alert, high alert.
- Oh.
I have failed my sons.
I do not deserve my "Greatest Dad" coffee mug.
- Okay, we made it to an elevator.
- [gasps] They are not all caught.
I am as pleased as I am totally shocked.
- Is that Gus? Grab his tags.
- I cannot because it is the bellboy.
- They are still trying to get the dog tags.
- We gotta get to another floor,
and I know just how to do it. Lesson number four.
Slow...
motion...
jutsu.
[laughs] - [groans]
No.
Gus.
He's even more ferocious than I remember.
May my sons proceed with caution just this--
what?
- Whoa.
- [growls]
[sniffs]
Something doesn't smell right.
- Oh, no. He sniffed them out.
[grunts]
- What?
Thanks for the snack, food cart.
You're no longer on my to-pounce-on list.
- We blended.
- I must make sure the others are safe.
- High alert! Everyone to your stations.
Go, go, go!
Big Mama must be massaged and manicured A.S.A.P.
- Yes.
- [grumbles]
[gasps] Raphael.
Remember your training.
Stick to the shadows.
- Nom-nom-nom-nom-nom.
- Ah.
[laughs]
That is not what I meant by sticking to the shadows.
[sniffs]
What is that awful smell?
- Oh, no, Raph's "sneaking up on people" stink.
- [growls]
- Ahh.
- Oh, sweet. A ball.
- [grunts]
- Wait, who threw this ball?
[growls]
It's like I'm being followed, but no one's there.
Total bummer day.
- Now to find blue one.
Too many Yokai.
Surely my sons would not risk moving on Gus in here.
[gasps]
- Blind spot.
And a blind spot over here. And blind spot over here.
Another blind spot.
- What an epic Battle Nexus brawl!
They're gonna be talking about this one
for centuries to come.
Too bad they both can't win.
- What are you doing?
- And it's King Cthulhu for the win!
[all cheering]
- Yeah!
- Oh.
- Hey, wait a minute. You're one of those turtles.
[both snarling]
- [hoots]
- Blind spot.
See ya!
[laughs]
- Wheels on stairs, not my finest decision.
- [exclaims] [all grunting]
- Look out!
[all screaming]
- It's like I'm invisible--
[shouting]
[all shouting]
[groans]
- Where did they go? Hm?
- Ninja-hide somewhere ninja quick.
- You can't hide from me.
- Big Mama'll want to see you, loves.
- So for like a general "hey, how you been sesh," or--
- Come on! Let's make pops proud.
- Lights-off-jutsu.
- Oh, come on, Mikey. Like that's gonna--
- I will never doubt you again.
- [grunts] What?
- All right, boys.
- [laughs]
Huh?
[disco music]
- [groans]
- Are they going for his dog tags?
Get out of the there. He will devour you all.
- [growls]
Those turtles think they can sneak up on me,
they've got another--
[snarls]
- Wait a minute.
Blending into your environment.
Blind spots.
- [sniffs]
- [laughs]
- Oh, I cannot watch.
Slow motion jutsu.
- [sniffing]
- [groans]
- [laughs]
- Lessons one through five.
I taught them something, and they paid attention.
I do deserve my "World's Greatest Dad" coffee mug.
[all cheering]
- We got it. - Yeah.
- One demon dog's dog tags.
- My sons, your persistence and dedication knows no bounds.
Yes, your methods need work...
much, much, much, much, much work.
But I am honored to be your teacher,
and proud to be your father.
- Aww.
[all cheering]
- Go and celebrate.
[overlapping chatter]
- Love you, Dad!
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪