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{\an8}- ♪ Rise of the Teenage
Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
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{\an8}♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪
3
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{\an8}♪ Rise of the Teenage
Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
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{\an8}♪ Heroes in the half shell,
Turtle power ♪
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{\an8}♪ Rising up against evil
Paint the city green ♪
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{\an8}♪ Raph is ready for a fight
Leo's making a scene ♪
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{\an8}♪ Mikey's got mad skills
Donnie rocks machines ♪
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{\an8}♪ With each other
they discover ♪
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{\an8}♪ Their destiny and rise ♪
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{\an8}♪ Cowabunga Rise of the
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪
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{\an8}♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Heroes in a half shell ♪
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{\an8}♪ Turtle power
Rise ♪
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Red Fox.
Thank the moons.
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The evil count and his robot
vampires ambushed me.
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Side note--that black hole
machine's about to suck up
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the galaxy in six seconds.
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In six seconds?
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Leaping light years.
There's only one thing to do.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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- Yeah!
- Whoo!
21
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Sometimes I think he won't
save the galaxy in time,
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but then he does!
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Um, are we still
movie marathoning,
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or is that the real
Jupiter Jim signal?
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Oh, boy.
I hope that's not--
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and it is.
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Well, if it isn't
my alien turtle allies.
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A pleasure.
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Alas, I was hoping my signal
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would bring back to me
my dear friend Red Fox.
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You mean the one
you kidnapped,
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like how you kidnapped
everyone else?
33
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You're not gonna kidnap us,
are you?
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No.
Of course not.
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Can you ever forgive me
for acting like--
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You're forgiven!
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Then it's good
that you've come.
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Red Fox has abandoned me,
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and an alien invader
threatens life on Earth.
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I need help.
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One of you four
must become my new sidekick.
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- Gasping.
- Your Jupiter-ness,
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I would be honored to be your--
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and now I'm tearing up here--
sidekick.
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Guys, I get it.
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When we were toddler mutant
ninja turtles we all dreamed
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of being JJ's sidekick,
but he's not a real superhero.
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Remember, he's a crazy actor
who thinks he's Jupiter Jim.
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But--but--but fun?
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Fine.
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You three have your fun,
but if any real crime--
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Okay, Mr. Jim.
We are in!
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Sham-pow!
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Tryouts will begin
stardate now.
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Ugh.
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Just make this stardate quick.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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Huh?
Whoa.
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D, the captain's chair
is not for sidekicks.
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Though, as JJ's biggest fan,
maybe you deserve to sit in it.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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Hmm.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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What's this?
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What?
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Leo, a sidekick,
sitting in the captain's chair?
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For shame.
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Minus one space
point for blue.
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Everyone starts
with 50 space points.
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First to 53 wins.
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He couldn't have
started at zero?
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Blue,
minus another space point,
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for asking questions
about space points.
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Now, the reason you're here...
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Wow.
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You've got to tell me
who your yarn guy is.
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This is the alien
I've been tracking.
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Scorpion.
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I don't know
what he's planning,
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but he's been spotted at
the bomb factory and the zoo.
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Let's go ahead and get
this competition started,
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so Leo can lose more points.
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Trial one--weapons.
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If we are to handle
Scorpion's alien powers,
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you must be as proficient
with my tech as Red Fox was.
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Now, engage.
Winner gets a space point.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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Ooh, give me one second.
I'm getting a call.
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Ugh!
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That is what you get
for playing space camp
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with Captain Coo-Coo.
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Trial Two--mortal peril.
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Often, I'm in danger.
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More often, you're in danger.
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It's like living inside
a Jupiter Jim comic!
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Scorpion may capture you,
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so show me who's got the
best screams of helplessness,
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so that I can find you.
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By the rings of Jupiter,
save me!
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Save me pretty,
pretty, pretty please!
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Save me, and I'll throw
in a free month of IT support!
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Ha!
Look at you guys.
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Fake whining
over clearly fake acid.
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all: Ahh!
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It burns!
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The sweet, bubbly acid burns!
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Oh, wait, it's just soda.
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{\an8}- Trial three.
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Trial three--
taking out henchmen,
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because Scorpion
may have minions.
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Jaw drop.
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Wow, you spare no expense
on your training exercises.
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Still silly,
just expensive silly.
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Space points for every
hench bot you take out.
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Sidekick ahoy!
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Oh, that's cheating.
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Just preparing you for when
allies suddenly become foes.
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Like this!
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Nice, orange.
Plus one space point.
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You know I don't
like to share.
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Well, I've made my decision.
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Probably best to let
the losers down abruptly.
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Agreed.
Red, you're my new sidekick.
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- What?
- Me?
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Yes!
Yes, yes, yes!
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In your face!
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And yours.
And yours again.
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What?
You didn't even want the job.
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That was before I won.
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Red wasn't even
in the competition!
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Yes, but he's red,
and I'm used to red sidekicks.
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You wouldn't understand.
It's a red thing.
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All right,
Red Fox 2,
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let's go save the world
from Scorpion.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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Have you seen a man
who looks like a scorpion?
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Snitches get stitches.
I understand.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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Come on, pal.
We know you know something.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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{\an8}- Sidekick montages are fun.
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Can you believe Raph stealing
our fake sidekick job?
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I don't think I'm overreacting
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when I say he is no longer
a member of this family.
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Wait.
Maybe this is a test.
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Sir Jupiter wants us to keep
fighting to be his sidekick.
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And I know exactly
who can help.
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00:06:48,827 --> 00:06:51,931
That loony goofus is still
obsessed with Scorpion?
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All those years
saving the galaxy together,
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and not a single "thank you,"
thumbs-up,
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or patronizing hair ruffle.
That's why I left.
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He's out there
looking for you, you know?
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Leaping light years.
Really?
155
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I mean whatevs.
156
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Let that hot dog
find another sidekick.
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Yeah, whatevs.
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Ah!
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Did your tail just--
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Are you a mutant?
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No.
What's a mutant?
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Oh, so you're a yokai then?
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Uh, yeah--
I mean, no.
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I mean this is--
this is just a costume.
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Dude, no need
for secrets here.
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Whoa.
You're--you're real turtle men?
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- Real as rain, baby.
- Look, guys,
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I just want to move past
this whole cosmic kerfuffle
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and focus
on the serious art of acting.
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Two minutes until you're shot
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out of the space
alligator's nose, Ms. Fox.
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Now, if you'll excuse me,
I must get into character,
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before I climb
into the snot cannon.
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{\an8}♪ ♪
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I really thought
that camel alien
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was going to spill the beans.
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Someone's following us,
Red Fox 2.
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00:07:55,724 --> 00:07:59,724
Quick, duck into that
zoo storage facility.
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You mean into that
creepy and poorly-lit dead end
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with probably no exits
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00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:05,620
and where we'll be
totally trapped?
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Sure thing, boss!
Having fun is fun.
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Gotta say this part
isn't all that fun.
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You walked right
into my trap.
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Scorpion.
186
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Wait.
This is real?
187
00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:24,758
You may have found my
stinger bombs and vat of acid,
188
00:08:24,827 --> 00:08:27,965
but you'll never foil my plan,
space freak.
189
00:08:28,034 --> 00:08:30,206
- You're a real alien?
- Alien?
190
00:08:30,275 --> 00:08:31,862
No.
191
00:08:31,931 --> 00:08:34,931
{\an8}My coworkers at the zoo
locked me in the scorpion pit
192
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{\an8}where I got bit
by some glowy, green bug.
193
00:08:37,655 --> 00:08:39,896
A mutant?
Of course.
194
00:08:39,965 --> 00:08:42,034
Wow, Raph really
whiffed on this one.
195
00:08:42,103 --> 00:08:45,482
Now, once you two
are blown into bits,
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00:08:45,551 --> 00:08:47,965
and your bits
are dissolved in acid,
197
00:08:48,034 --> 00:08:52,379
I can carry out my truly
evil plan of exterminating
198
00:08:52,448 --> 00:08:55,758
my old coworkers
and that one camel.
199
00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:02,517
In all my years with Red Fox,
we never got trapped together.
200
00:09:02,586 --> 00:09:04,275
I blame you.
201
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:07,275
Sham-pow!
Real sidekicks in the house.
202
00:09:07,344 --> 00:09:08,896
Hold up.
203
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:11,931
You made your own alien
Scorpion plus bombs and acid?
204
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,689
Respect.
205
00:09:13,758 --> 00:09:17,275
No, no, guys, it's all real!
Dude's a mutant!
206
00:09:17,344 --> 00:09:19,275
Pretty sure he's an alien.
207
00:09:19,344 --> 00:09:22,793
You three, free me so I can
stop the stinger bombs.
208
00:09:22,862 --> 00:09:25,827
Don't listen to him.
This ain't a Jupiter Jim comic.
209
00:09:25,896 --> 00:09:27,620
You gotta defuse
the bombs yourselves!
210
00:09:27,689 --> 00:09:30,068
Sidekicks defusing bombs?
211
00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:33,034
What is this,
a Lou Jitsu movie?
212
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,517
Ah!
213
00:09:38,586 --> 00:09:40,344
Guys, Red's right.
Real acid.
214
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,344
Real mutant.
215
00:09:44,310 --> 00:09:46,172
Ah!
Ah!
216
00:09:46,241 --> 00:09:47,862
Feels like it might be time
to stop listening
217
00:09:47,931 --> 00:09:51,034
to our comic book leader
and do our real leaders thing.
218
00:10:09,758 --> 00:10:11,931
Ahh!
219
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,931
Okay.
Well, try to stop this.
220
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,551
Ahh!
221
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,620
- Red Fox one?
- Holy nebulas!
222
00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:25,448
You've come
back to me.
223
00:10:25,517 --> 00:10:28,965
{\an8}♪ ♪
224
00:10:29,034 --> 00:10:32,758
Defeated by a band of freaks!
225
00:10:32,827 --> 00:10:34,103
We can still see you.
226
00:10:34,172 --> 00:10:36,068
You have to move
before the smoke clears.
227
00:10:36,137 --> 00:10:40,551
- Oh, peanuts.
- Good grab.
228
00:10:40,620 --> 00:10:43,206
A million space points,
old chum.
229
00:10:43,275 --> 00:10:44,275
A million.
230
00:10:44,344 --> 00:10:46,275
I still have a chance though,
right?
231
00:10:46,344 --> 00:10:49,896
I've done it again,
for the 80th time.
232
00:10:49,965 --> 00:10:52,448
Jupiter Jim saves the galaxy.
233
00:10:52,517 --> 00:10:53,965
Ahem.
234
00:10:54,034 --> 00:10:57,620
With the help
of his sidekick Red Fox.
235
00:10:57,689 --> 00:10:59,103
Thank you, my friend.
236
00:10:59,172 --> 00:11:02,758
You thanked me!
That's all I ever wanted.
237
00:11:02,827 --> 00:11:06,241
Consider me no longer
space mad at you.
238
00:11:06,310 --> 00:11:08,103
Tough news, turtles.
239
00:11:08,172 --> 00:11:11,275
The sidekick position
has been refilled.
240
00:11:11,344 --> 00:11:12,517
Farewell.
241
00:11:12,586 --> 00:11:14,448
Well, I guess
we learned our lesson.
242
00:11:14,517 --> 00:11:16,241
Stay away from actors.
243
00:11:16,310 --> 00:11:18,793
But if anyone is still
looking for sidekick work,
244
00:11:18,862 --> 00:11:20,172
I am interviewing.
245
00:11:20,241 --> 00:11:22,275
- Pass.
- Minus one Donnie point.