1 00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:10,709 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 2 00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:16,191 WOMAN: The big question is, how aggressive do you want to be? 3 00:01:16,285 --> 00:01:18,902 LEIGH: Very aggressive. We don't want to lose any more time. 4 00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:21,784 You've been trying for... Two years? 5 00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:23,165 And four months. 6 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:27,373 Uh, I have the app monitoring ovulation, 7 00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:29,566 taking temperature and mucus levels, 8 00:01:29,590 --> 00:01:32,424 we've been, uh, planning and pacing intercourse. 9 00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:34,175 It's been very romantic. 10 00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:37,588 So we're looking at IUI or IVF. 11 00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:40,506 IUI is the least invasive. And outpatient. 12 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:41,682 IUI... 13 00:01:42,561 --> 00:01:44,706 Didn't you read the thing? I told you to read the thing. 14 00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:46,096 DOCTOR: Intrauterine insemination. 15 00:01:46,189 --> 00:01:48,042 The sperm are injected directly into the uterus. 16 00:01:48,066 --> 00:01:50,399 - And yes, it's outpatient. - Let's start there. 17 00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:52,643 - DOCTOR: You're 39, Steven? - Mmm-hmm. 18 00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:55,984 Okay, we'll test your sperm for count and motility percentage. 19 00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:58,942 And how far away are we from your period, Leigh? 20 00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:01,323 It's unpredictable. A week, maybe 10 days. 21 00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:03,495 DOCTOR: Your cycle's unpredictable? 22 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:05,664 Is that a problem? 23 00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:07,784 DOCTOR: Possibly, possibly not. 24 00:02:07,878 --> 00:02:09,995 That and your age are all factors. 25 00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:12,876 Over 35, the situation becomes more difficult. 26 00:02:13,383 --> 00:02:14,999 But very often, it's manageable. 27 00:02:15,177 --> 00:02:17,510 But it might be likely that, based on your test results, 28 00:02:17,596 --> 00:02:19,007 we go straight to in vitro. 29 00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:20,825 LEIGH: Will Insurance help with that? 30 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:22,761 DOCTOR: Most companies won't cover IVF, 31 00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:26,140 but very often, the genetic testing for the man will be covered. 32 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,249 - Oh, that sounds fair. - (DOCTOR AND LEIGH CHUCKLE) 33 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:30,981 DOCTOR: All right, so, Steven, when can we schedule your tests? 34 00:02:31,068 --> 00:02:32,229 Which tests? 35 00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:35,611 A blood panel for chromosomal diagnosis, 36 00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:36,813 a sample of your semen. 37 00:02:36,907 --> 00:02:38,489 When did you last ejaculate? 38 00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:40,442 A week. 39 00:02:40,786 --> 00:02:41,786 Maybe less. 40 00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:43,118 No, it's two weeks. 41 00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:44,491 When... 42 00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:47,157 Ah. 43 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,330 DOCTOR: We'll need to reschedule it for another time. 44 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:51,311 We need within three to five days after. 45 00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:57,883 Homework, honey. (CHUCKLES) 46 00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:02,471 (SIGHS) 47 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:03,965 We gotta talk. 48 00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:06,686 About what? 49 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:09,188 Steve? 50 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:12,650 Steve! 51 00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:14,610 Steve. 52 00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:17,107 Steve! 53 00:03:20,742 --> 00:03:22,278 Oh. I'm sorry. 54 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,658 - I'll just put it there. - I can fix this. 55 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:30,116 SHIRLEY: No, I don't want to cancel it, I just wanted a usage alert. 56 00:03:30,794 --> 00:03:33,002 So you'll text me next time it's used? 57 00:03:34,506 --> 00:03:35,587 Okay. Thanks. 58 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,291 He hasn't used the credit card yet. 59 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:40,251 They're going to send me an alert when he does. 60 00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,007 We can get a location from that. 61 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,338 God, I hope he 62 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:47,930 just tries an ATM and doesn't trade the card for dope. 63 00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:49,270 Does he have your PIN? 64 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:50,730 Are you kidding? 65 00:03:50,856 --> 00:03:52,222 Why would he try an ATM? 66 00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:55,187 I'm sorry, Steve. Do you have a better suggestion? 67 00:03:55,444 --> 00:03:59,063 He took the card to use the card, and now we'll know if he does. 68 00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,941 He didn't have to break the house. 69 00:04:04,035 --> 00:04:05,947 HUGH: No, I don't think he did. 70 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:07,282 Me neither. 71 00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:09,497 Someone ask you what you think, Theodora? 72 00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:11,167 Sorry. 73 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:13,417 SHIRLEY: If it wasn't Luke, who was it? 74 00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:14,960 STEVE: Maybe one of your kids. 75 00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:17,921 SHIRLEY: Yeah, that makes sense. It was probably my kids. 76 00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:21,134 Or maybe it was the guy who just stole a car 77 00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:22,380 to put a needle in his arm. 78 00:04:22,471 --> 00:04:24,258 I'm worried about a lot more than that. 79 00:04:24,347 --> 00:04:25,463 What do you mean? 80 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:29,221 I mean, that suicides can cluster in families, 81 00:04:29,561 --> 00:04:30,722 especially twins. 82 00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:33,182 If they lose a twin, 83 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:34,806 the odds go up. 84 00:04:35,567 --> 00:04:38,981 He may not be planning to come home. 85 00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:43,360 - Where... Where would he go? - SHIRLEY: He could be anywhere. 86 00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:48,115 He was picked up off Mass Ave a few times when he was living here. 87 00:04:48,705 --> 00:04:50,037 Methadone Mile. 88 00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:53,241 - What's that? - Mass Ave, south of downtown. 89 00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:55,952 It's basically an open-air drug market. 90 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:57,505 I remember it. 91 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,631 - I'll go look for him. - SHIRLEY: It's a waste of gas. 92 00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,862 - He could be anywhere. - Yeah, I'll... I'll go with you. 93 00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,048 - I got this. - SHIRLEY: Just wait a bit. 94 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:07,283 - We'll see if he's using the card. - STEVE: Call me if he does. 95 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,035 SHIRLEY: What are you gonna do? Drive in circles? 96 00:05:09,059 --> 00:05:12,177 - Hope he's standing on some corner? - STEVE: Maybe, I don't know. 97 00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,933 We're really not gonna tell them what we saw? 98 00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:17,483 (SCOFFS) 99 00:05:19,778 --> 00:05:20,778 Damn it, Luke. 100 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:23,489 (SIGHS ANGRILY) 101 00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,407 We going or what? 102 00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:32,873 I just want to help. 103 00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:36,625 YOUNG STEVE: I just want to help. 104 00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:39,837 Look, bud, I know you do, 105 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:43,424 but I'm gonna start using some really strong chemicals down here, 106 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,796 and it just isn't safe. 107 00:05:45,387 --> 00:05:46,867 I can help with something else, then. 108 00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,341 Look, pal, 109 00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:51,515 I've already hired all the help I can afford 110 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:53,882 just to get everything else finished by the end of summer. 111 00:05:56,565 --> 00:05:58,898 I could use your help with something, though. 112 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,065 - Yeah? - Yeah. 113 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:04,779 See, your mom's gonna go to your Aunt Janet's in a few days 114 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:06,323 and stay a bit. 115 00:06:06,658 --> 00:06:07,694 Maybe a week. 116 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:09,493 How come? 117 00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:13,822 Well, you know, she's been cooped up in this house all summer, and... 118 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:16,581 Anyway, I know it's not the most exciting thing, 119 00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:19,001 but I could really use your help 120 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:21,625 watching your brother and your sisters while she's away. 121 00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:23,507 Yeah. 122 00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:24,633 Yeah, I got you. 123 00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,051 Okay. 124 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:30,505 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 125 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:33,929 (HAMMERING) 126 00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,182 (GENTLE TAPPING) 127 00:06:56,875 --> 00:06:57,875 Mom? 128 00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,996 OLIVIA: What do you mean, sweetheart? 129 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:02,499 Of course you're safe with me. 130 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,421 - Mom. - (GASPS) 131 00:07:06,635 --> 00:07:07,635 Are you okay? 132 00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:10,512 Where... 133 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:11,800 Where are the twins? 134 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,140 Downstairs. 135 00:07:14,309 --> 00:07:15,309 (SIGHS) 136 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,144 Of course. 137 00:07:17,479 --> 00:07:19,846 - Are you sure... - I'm fine, sweetie. I'm fine. 138 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:24,312 (ZAPPING) 139 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:27,154 (BEEPING) 140 00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:35,987 (UPBEAT MELODY PLAYING) 141 00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:47,508 Okay, thanks. 142 00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:51,252 Well, he's... He's not at Holy Family. 143 00:07:51,388 --> 00:07:53,926 Well, he's probably not gonna instantly OD. 144 00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:57,137 You're gonna call every hospital in Boston? That the plan? 145 00:07:57,227 --> 00:08:00,516 What, you're gonna just drive around, hope we spot him in a city of 700,000? 146 00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:03,939 I'm not looking for him. I'm looking for a beat-up green Jeep 147 00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:06,642 with not one, but two, Ani DiFranco bumper stickers, 148 00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:08,816 and I'm looking for it where I know he used to score. 149 00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:10,813 Gotta do something. 150 00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:12,574 Yeah, we do. 151 00:08:15,787 --> 00:08:17,494 - So, um... - (STEVE SIGHS) 152 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:19,746 What's going on? 153 00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:22,166 - Hmm? - What's going on with you and Leigh? 154 00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:23,288 What do you mean? 155 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:24,878 Well, I mean... 156 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:29,248 - How's your marriage? - (CHUCKLING) You're kidding, right? 157 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,458 You're not living at home, 158 00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:32,405 and I couldn't help but notice at the funeral... 159 00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:35,342 - You aren't seriously doing this. - Well, yeah, I am. I... 160 00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:37,799 Jesus Christ, Dad, you're out of line. 161 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:41,352 We might be in the car for a while, and so I thought to myself, 162 00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:43,998 "I'm going to ask my son about his life." What's wrong with that? 163 00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:45,390 Doesn't work that way, Dad. 164 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,903 Your mom and I were married 15 years. 165 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,365 Together five before that. 166 00:08:58,079 --> 00:09:00,696 She used to say she was the kite and I was the line. 167 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,958 She was a... Creature of the clouds 168 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:07,128 and... And I was a creature of the earth. 169 00:09:08,465 --> 00:09:11,378 And she'd say that, without me, she'd become untethered 170 00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:13,425 and she would float away up into the... 171 00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:16,803 And then, without her, I would just, you know, 172 00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:19,177 crash, just drop right down to the ground, 173 00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:20,633 and, you know. 174 00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:24,012 But... Together... (CHUCKLES) 175 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:26,231 We... 176 00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:32,937 You know, we separated. 177 00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,485 You... You didn't know that, probably. 178 00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:39,235 Briefly, we separated. You were one year old. 179 00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:41,578 Stupidest thing I ever did. 180 00:09:41,664 --> 00:09:44,247 You know, I made some stupid proclamation, and that was it. 181 00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:45,334 Two weeks. 182 00:09:46,669 --> 00:09:50,162 Two weeks. I don't even know how we got there. I just know we fought. 183 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:54,125 I don't know what we fought about, but I finally came to my senses, and... 184 00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:57,548 (SIGHS) I thought, "What the hell, 185 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,847 "you stupid asshole. What are you, insane?" 186 00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:02,432 So, you know, I came back and knocked on the door, 187 00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,727 she answered it, she put her arms around me, 188 00:10:04,854 --> 00:10:07,346 she kissed me, she forgave me with her eyes, and... 189 00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:09,650 She handed you to me. 190 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:12,689 I had you in one arm and her in the other, and that was it. 191 00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:14,854 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 192 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:18,075 We were back at it. 193 00:10:19,994 --> 00:10:21,826 And Shirley came along, and... 194 00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,947 From that moment on, we were on the same team. 195 00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:26,907 You know, we still fought sometimes, 196 00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:28,669 but it was... 197 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:32,080 It was different. We fought with love. She taught me that. 198 00:10:32,590 --> 00:10:33,706 You fight with love. 199 00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,131 Yeah, when you're... 200 00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:40,300 You're on the same team even when you're in the middle of a fight. 201 00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:41,765 During the fight, 202 00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:43,928 you're... You're forgiven. 203 00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,511 There's no fear. There's no danger. You're safe. 204 00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:50,769 I hope, really, you get to experience that sometime. 205 00:10:51,025 --> 00:10:52,025 It's a... 206 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,851 It's a beautiful way to be. 207 00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:59,106 You know, look, we weren't perfect... 208 00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:02,868 But we were always kind. 209 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,954 And we loved each other hard. 210 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:10,998 And I love her today just as much as I did in the beginning. 211 00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:15,793 The kite and the line. 212 00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:23,009 So whatever you need to fix between you and Leigh... 213 00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:26,967 I really... I really hope you do. 214 00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:31,565 And, uh... 215 00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:35,859 That's all I... That's all I really wanted to say. 216 00:11:39,282 --> 00:11:41,490 ALLIE: Candy, candy, candy, candy! 217 00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,234 Sure you won't come with us? 218 00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:44,328 You guys have fun. 219 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,324 Come on, Mom, candy! 220 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:48,827 We'll bring her back some. Mom's had a very hard day. 221 00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,494 Would you stop that? 222 00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:53,502 I'm still disappointed you're not going as Captain Lame. 223 00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:55,496 (SIGHS) I swear to God, Dad. 224 00:11:55,590 --> 00:11:57,047 ALLIE: Candy, candy, candy! 225 00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:58,717 Hey. 226 00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:00,884 Can we talk when I get back? 227 00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:04,088 How? You'll be back at the hotel. 228 00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:06,391 Okay. 229 00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:08,602 Okay, Shirl. 230 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:11,396 Stop. 231 00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:13,778 - Let's go. - SHIRLEY: Turn off the porch light. 232 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:15,641 I can't handle trick-or-treaters tonight. 233 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:19,655 I love you. 234 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,235 You guys have fun. 235 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:34,331 - (PIECES CLATTERING) - (SIGHS) 236 00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,145 What the hell? 237 00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,145 (DOORBELL RINGS) 238 00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:05,274 (DOORBELL RINGS) 239 00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:08,527 Sorry, no candy here. 240 00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:13,828 (DOORBELL RINGS) 241 00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:17,711 Goddamn light's off. 242 00:13:24,595 --> 00:13:26,052 (INSECTS CHIRPING) 243 00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:41,189 HUGH: I'm gonna call the hospitals again. 244 00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:43,692 - Maybe he just forgot his ID. - STEVE: And ask them what? 245 00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:45,568 If they've seen a junkie in a funeral suit? 246 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,945 He's 90 days clean and he's your brother. 247 00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:49,243 He's a good man, Steve. 248 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:50,945 They're not mutually exclusive. 249 00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,406 He's my brother, but he's a junkie. 250 00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:57,997 We're not gonna find him like this. 251 00:13:58,171 --> 00:13:59,771 - You didn't have to come. - Yeah, I did. 252 00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,959 - No, you really didn't. - Yeah, I did, Steve. 253 00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,172 He's my son. You know? My... 254 00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:09,346 I don't know what I'd do if I lost him, any of you. 255 00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:10,640 (SCOFFS) 256 00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:13,767 Yeah, I had to come. 257 00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:16,936 I can't... I can't lose... 258 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,148 I can't lose anyone else. (SIGHS) 259 00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,319 One day, when you have children, you'll understand. 260 00:14:24,405 --> 00:14:26,317 (SCOFFS) I'm never having children. 261 00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:29,741 Well, that's... That's a shame. 262 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:33,286 'Cause you kids are the best thing in my life. 263 00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:35,034 You mean Aunt Janet's life? 264 00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,256 She's the one who raised your kids, didn't she? 265 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:39,480 - You don't know what it was like. - You never told me. 266 00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,166 Everything I did, I did to protect you. 267 00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:43,042 To protect us, I know, yeah. 268 00:14:43,132 --> 00:14:44,589 Just like you protected Mom. 269 00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:47,761 Here we go. 270 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,423 I saw the police reports. 271 00:14:52,141 --> 00:14:54,133 Her skull cracked like a melon... 272 00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,827 All right, Steve, why don't you just...? 273 00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,638 There was blood all over the library carpet. 274 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:01,353 There were bruises on her upper arms 275 00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:03,855 because someone grabbed her pretty hard. 276 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:04,945 Okay, Steve... 277 00:15:05,029 --> 00:15:08,693 And a contusion on the back of her head from being shoved into a wall? 278 00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:12,242 Her ankle was twisted, so she was limping, 279 00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:14,661 she was bruised to hell, depressed out of her mind, 280 00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:17,865 unmedicated, untreated, and abandoned. 281 00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:19,450 It wasn't like that. 282 00:15:19,544 --> 00:15:21,661 I did my best. You have no idea... 283 00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:23,962 You threw us in a car, you left her there alone, 284 00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:26,586 and she threw herself off the goddamn staircase, 285 00:15:26,676 --> 00:15:27,712 and that was your best? 286 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:30,447 All right, well, she should not have been left alone in the house... 287 00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:33,179 Fuck the house. It wasn't the house. She was sick. 288 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:36,304 She was sick in her mind, and the one person, 289 00:15:36,394 --> 00:15:38,761 the one person that was supposed to take care of her 290 00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:41,723 didn't do a goddamn thing to get her help. 291 00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:44,187 (SIGHS) 292 00:15:47,572 --> 00:15:48,572 I miss her. 293 00:15:51,325 --> 00:15:52,566 I miss my mom. 294 00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:57,783 I miss her too. 295 00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:04,082 It's certainly beautiful. Where did you find it? 296 00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:06,089 The game room. 297 00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:08,335 - The what room? - Upstairs. 298 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:11,169 You know, I think a little paint, maybe fix those doors, 299 00:16:11,262 --> 00:16:13,754 - and she might really love it. - I'm sure she will. 300 00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:16,799 So do you know where the paint and stuff is? 301 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:20,014 - Why don't you ask your father? - I did. He's busy. 302 00:16:20,146 --> 00:16:22,980 He said if it wasn't tagged for sale, I could do whatever I wanted. 303 00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:24,556 And it's not tagged for sale. 304 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,727 Well, I do know where some paint is. 305 00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:33,607 (SIGHS) I thought so. 306 00:16:34,285 --> 00:16:36,117 This must have been Poppy's. 307 00:16:36,621 --> 00:16:37,621 Poppy? 308 00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:39,909 Poppy Hill. 309 00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,578 She was William's wife. 310 00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:44,751 She was insane. 311 00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:47,041 Yeah, she looks kind of wild. 312 00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:48,793 No, I mean clinically. 313 00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:50,300 So was he. 314 00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:54,344 William's parents sent him to an institution when he was a kid. 315 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:57,423 They called it private school, but it wasn't a school, though. 316 00:16:57,517 --> 00:17:00,635 It was just a place where rich parents hid their embarrassments. 317 00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:04,396 They met in the mental institution. 318 00:17:04,774 --> 00:17:06,515 They fell in love in an asylum. 319 00:17:06,901 --> 00:17:08,267 She was insane. 320 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:10,779 Did you know her? 321 00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:13,192 Oh, yes. 322 00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,529 She was just as crazy, just older. (SCOFFS) 323 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:21,742 She was a beautiful young woman in her time, though. 324 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:24,325 No doubt about that. 325 00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:35,840 If you really want this to be a surprise for your mom, 326 00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:38,759 I'd suggest you don't work on it in your room. 327 00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,642 (VIDEO GAME ZAPPING AND BEEPING) 328 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,009 (DOORBELL RINGS) 329 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,437 (BREATHING DEEPLY) 330 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,272 (DOORBELL RINGS) 331 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,904 Just take the fucking candy and go. 332 00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:46,750 (KNOCKING AT DOOR) 333 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:48,412 (INHALES SHARPLY) 334 00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:01,014 (DOOR CLOSES) 335 00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:02,555 You're very clever. 336 00:19:03,601 --> 00:19:05,217 How about you try another house? 337 00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:06,927 I'm not in the fucking mood! 338 00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:15,561 (SIGHS) 339 00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:18,239 (GASPS) 340 00:19:23,037 --> 00:19:24,037 (KNOCKING AT DOOR) 341 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:33,749 (URGENT KNOCKING) 342 00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:35,548 (SIGHS) 343 00:19:38,302 --> 00:19:40,089 What the fuck do you want? 344 00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:43,672 Um... Oh. 345 00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:46,508 I was just coming to apologize. 346 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:49,637 Who were you yelling at? 347 00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:52,931 Some fucking kids are... 348 00:19:54,402 --> 00:19:55,402 Just forget it. 349 00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:04,242 - Wait. - Not now. 350 00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:05,906 - I can explain. - I doubt that. 351 00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:08,725 - Shouldn't you be packing? - I know what it looked like last night. 352 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:10,149 You were making out with my husband. 353 00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:12,041 No. No, there was no actual... 354 00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:15,292 Okay, so from what I can remember, which isn't a lot actually, 355 00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:16,464 he pushed me away. 356 00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,007 - Is that supposed to make this better? - It wasn't even him. 357 00:20:19,093 --> 00:20:22,006 It wasn't... I didn't see him. It wasn't about him. 358 00:20:22,096 --> 00:20:24,213 It's about you getting out of my guest house 359 00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:25,547 and off my fucking property. 360 00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:27,007 If you would just let me talk. 361 00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,808 I don't care what you have to say. 362 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:31,181 Don't you understand? Get out! 363 00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,729 You are impossible. Do you know that? 364 00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:34,181 I'm sorry, have I offended you? 365 00:20:34,275 --> 00:20:37,036 You are always throwing it in my face that I live in your guest house. 366 00:20:37,111 --> 00:20:38,111 Won't happen again. 367 00:20:38,404 --> 00:20:39,940 I choose to live there, Shirley. 368 00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:42,943 - With you, for you. - Oh, I can't thank you enough. 369 00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:44,194 You ice people out. 370 00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:45,285 You always have. 371 00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:46,450 I ice people out? 372 00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:47,986 Have you met yourself? 373 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,697 And so I chose to live there to help try and keep you warm. 374 00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:52,453 You fucking suck at apologies. 375 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:56,036 I don't have to live in your guest house. I'm not some bohemian weirdo. 376 00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:57,211 I'm an adult. 377 00:20:57,339 --> 00:20:58,830 I am a fucking doctor. 378 00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,381 You're a fucking slut. 379 00:21:02,011 --> 00:21:03,218 I just need you to know 380 00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:05,907 that it wasn't Kevin's fault and he didn't do anything... 381 00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:08,218 Don't you fucking dare defend my husband. 382 00:21:08,309 --> 00:21:10,926 All of us, all of us are just always helping you 383 00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:13,808 keep up this idea in your head that you're perfect Shirley, 384 00:21:13,898 --> 00:21:15,855 and we're just a bunch of fuck-ups fucking up. 385 00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:17,252 Perfect Shirley's perfect fucking life... 386 00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,276 Out! 387 00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:19,736 No! 388 00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:22,062 You do not just get to shut me out of your... 389 00:21:24,241 --> 00:21:25,357 (GASPS) 390 00:21:26,911 --> 00:21:28,618 Did you just punch me in the boob? 391 00:21:30,498 --> 00:21:31,498 Yeah. 392 00:21:32,416 --> 00:21:33,416 Yeah! 393 00:21:34,168 --> 00:21:36,205 If you kiss my husband, that's what you get. 394 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,378 You get punched in the fucking boob. 395 00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:39,881 And you get evicted 396 00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:41,767 - from my fucking house. - (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 397 00:21:44,094 --> 00:21:45,380 (POUNDING ON DOOR) 398 00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:00,733 (POUNDING AT DOOR) 399 00:22:01,111 --> 00:22:02,318 (GASPS) 400 00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:03,737 (KNOCKING AT WINDOW) 401 00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:08,195 (BANGING ON WINDOW) 402 00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:12,320 (RHYTHMIC BANGING ON WINDOW) 403 00:22:13,123 --> 00:22:15,285 (LOUD BANGING ON DOOR AND WINDOWS) 404 00:22:17,545 --> 00:22:19,036 (CRASHING AT DOOR) 405 00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:24,634 (BANGING STOPS) 406 00:22:34,812 --> 00:22:35,848 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 407 00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:46,775 (CAR HORN BLARING) 408 00:22:48,659 --> 00:22:50,070 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 409 00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:52,370 Shirl? 410 00:22:52,997 --> 00:22:54,033 What's up? 411 00:22:54,874 --> 00:22:55,955 THEY: They... 412 00:22:58,252 --> 00:22:59,252 Sorry, they... 413 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:01,916 They got a hit. 414 00:23:03,257 --> 00:23:05,749 He used the card at a gas station. 415 00:23:06,844 --> 00:23:08,631 202, just east of Amherst. 416 00:23:09,930 --> 00:23:10,930 Amherst? 417 00:23:11,098 --> 00:23:12,098 Um... 418 00:23:12,266 --> 00:23:13,973 Can you text me the address? 419 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:18,595 - Shirl? - Yeah. 420 00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:20,890 I'm here. Sorry. Uh... 421 00:23:21,901 --> 00:23:24,018 Yeah, I'll... I'll text you the address. 422 00:23:25,112 --> 00:23:27,820 - Amherst is on the way... - HUGH: Yeah, I know where it is. 423 00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:30,240 You guys are gonna stay there. We're gonna go to Amherst. 424 00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:33,660 I'm saying, if he's stopping in Amherst, he's heading... 425 00:23:33,746 --> 00:23:35,829 Shirley, listen to me, you're gonna stay put. 426 00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:37,747 - You hear me? - Tell them what happened. 427 00:23:38,792 --> 00:23:40,328 Tell them what just happened. 428 00:23:41,879 --> 00:23:42,995 I'll text you. 429 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:47,423 Some fucking kids playing a prank is what happened. 430 00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:48,509 You know it wasn't. 431 00:23:49,178 --> 00:23:50,178 You know that. 432 00:23:51,513 --> 00:23:54,722 That's not the only thing like that that's happened here tonight. 433 00:23:58,979 --> 00:24:01,437 I think Luke is going to the house. 434 00:24:02,399 --> 00:24:04,356 STEVE: Of course he is. (SIGHS) 435 00:24:04,443 --> 00:24:06,400 The goddamn house. 436 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:10,105 It was a good enough spot for Nell, it's a good enough spot for Luke. 437 00:24:10,199 --> 00:24:11,280 He always wanted to do 438 00:24:11,367 --> 00:24:12,574 what she did his whole life. 439 00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:13,901 - You think you know. - Uh-huh. 440 00:24:13,994 --> 00:24:15,906 And you just don't, you don't understand. 441 00:24:15,996 --> 00:24:17,828 Last time I saw Mom, 442 00:24:18,582 --> 00:24:19,868 the look in her eye, 443 00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:21,373 I've seen that look. 444 00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:23,205 In Nell over the years, 445 00:24:23,295 --> 00:24:24,911 and Luke, from the start, 446 00:24:25,005 --> 00:24:26,086 from when he'd sit there 447 00:24:26,173 --> 00:24:27,414 drawing crazy ghouls 448 00:24:27,508 --> 00:24:28,508 in his tree house. 449 00:24:28,592 --> 00:24:31,005 And, hell, I've seen that look in the mirror. 450 00:24:33,347 --> 00:24:34,713 Our family has a disease 451 00:24:34,807 --> 00:24:35,847 that's never been treated, 452 00:24:35,933 --> 00:24:38,471 because it was easier to listen to your crazy stories 453 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:39,596 about an evil house. 454 00:24:42,106 --> 00:24:43,458 You think you saw it in the mirror? 455 00:24:43,482 --> 00:24:45,202 That's why you think you'll never have kids? 456 00:24:45,275 --> 00:24:46,811 Oh, I know I'm never having children. 457 00:24:46,902 --> 00:24:47,938 Because you think that 458 00:24:48,028 --> 00:24:50,065 they'll just have the same imaginary sickness? 459 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:52,192 They would. We all do. 460 00:24:52,282 --> 00:24:54,649 Nell was delusional, depressed. 461 00:24:54,743 --> 00:24:57,656 Luke's an addict, Shirley is a control freak, 462 00:24:57,746 --> 00:25:00,614 and Theo's basically a clenched fist with hair. 463 00:25:01,458 --> 00:25:04,246 The whole fucking family is on the brink of a breakdown 464 00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:05,918 and seeing things that aren't there, 465 00:25:06,005 --> 00:25:07,496 hearing things that aren't there, 466 00:25:07,589 --> 00:25:10,047 and that shit happened after the house. 467 00:25:10,134 --> 00:25:11,295 It's not the house. 468 00:25:11,385 --> 00:25:14,002 There's something wrong with our goddamn brains. 469 00:25:14,388 --> 00:25:16,129 So yeah, I'm never having children. 470 00:25:17,599 --> 00:25:18,635 I made sure. 471 00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:23,354 A vasectomy. 472 00:25:25,733 --> 00:25:26,733 Right out of college. 473 00:25:28,193 --> 00:25:31,277 And it was the right call, believe me, because if I ever doubted it, 474 00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:34,447 some of the bullshit I've been hallucinating this week... 475 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:38,036 You really did? 476 00:25:39,079 --> 00:25:40,079 Yeah. 477 00:25:42,499 --> 00:25:43,785 Before you met Leigh? 478 00:25:46,420 --> 00:25:47,536 (SIGHS DEEPLY) 479 00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:48,963 Boy. 480 00:25:50,799 --> 00:25:51,799 You didn't tell her? 481 00:25:53,594 --> 00:25:54,675 You didn't tell her. 482 00:25:56,221 --> 00:25:57,221 No. 483 00:25:59,475 --> 00:26:01,011 She wanted kids, I knew that. 484 00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:05,262 And I kept thinking, "I'll tell her later, now's not the time." 485 00:26:07,232 --> 00:26:10,145 (SIGHS) But then we were engaged, and then we were married, 486 00:26:10,235 --> 00:26:13,444 and then we were trying, and she was upset it wasn't working. 487 00:26:16,825 --> 00:26:18,111 I couldn't say, 488 00:26:18,702 --> 00:26:20,534 "I can't. My genes... 489 00:26:21,371 --> 00:26:24,034 "My genes are rotten, Leigh." 490 00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:25,865 (STAMMERS) So I... I... 491 00:26:28,629 --> 00:26:29,870 I didn't tell her. 492 00:26:31,215 --> 00:26:34,504 And I thought I was being kind, I really thought that. 493 00:26:36,095 --> 00:26:38,838 (SIGHS) See, we're all fucking crazy. 494 00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:41,631 The crazy Crains. 495 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:45,639 This sickness already killed two of us, 496 00:26:45,729 --> 00:26:47,186 might kill a third tonight. 497 00:26:47,606 --> 00:26:48,606 That's... 498 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:50,689 Almost half. 499 00:26:52,903 --> 00:26:54,235 It'd be almost half of us. 500 00:26:56,073 --> 00:26:57,109 (SIGHS) 501 00:26:57,908 --> 00:27:00,867 So, you want to tell me more about the kite and the line? 502 00:27:03,163 --> 00:27:04,163 Or just... 503 00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:07,282 Just tell me what a shitty husband I was. 504 00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:08,960 Go ahead. 505 00:27:12,005 --> 00:27:13,086 I'm so sorry. 506 00:27:14,341 --> 00:27:15,341 I'm just... 507 00:27:18,804 --> 00:27:20,045 I'm just so sorry, son. 508 00:27:21,974 --> 00:27:23,010 OLIVIA: You did this? 509 00:27:23,433 --> 00:27:25,846 I mean, this is beautiful. You did this by yourself? 510 00:27:26,311 --> 00:27:27,927 Thought it might cheer you up. 511 00:27:28,397 --> 00:27:29,729 Dad said you've been... 512 00:27:30,691 --> 00:27:32,557 What? What did he say? 513 00:27:32,693 --> 00:27:34,229 I'm... I just... 514 00:27:34,319 --> 00:27:36,402 I know you're taking a little vacation. 515 00:27:36,488 --> 00:27:38,024 I wanted to cheer you up. 516 00:27:40,075 --> 00:27:41,075 Oh, sweetie. 517 00:27:42,703 --> 00:27:44,490 How long are you gonna be gone? 518 00:27:44,621 --> 00:27:45,828 Oh, not long. 519 00:27:46,123 --> 00:27:47,159 Not long, honey. 520 00:27:47,791 --> 00:27:49,282 I just need a little time away. 521 00:27:49,376 --> 00:27:50,742 It's nothing more than that, okay? 522 00:27:51,295 --> 00:27:52,295 Okay. 523 00:27:53,881 --> 00:27:55,042 This is perfect. 524 00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:59,133 (CHUCKLING) Thank you. Thank you! I love it. 525 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:04,721 (PANTING) 526 00:28:06,018 --> 00:28:07,018 Mom? 527 00:28:08,270 --> 00:28:09,386 (GRUNTS) 528 00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:16,021 Oh, baby. 529 00:28:18,155 --> 00:28:19,271 Oh, I'm so sorry. 530 00:28:20,282 --> 00:28:23,070 This is an older picture. He would have been wearing a suit. 531 00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:25,618 - About an hour ago. Did he come in? - Yeah, I think so. 532 00:28:25,704 --> 00:28:26,704 Yeah? 533 00:28:26,788 --> 00:28:28,905 Did he say anything weird or do anything... 534 00:28:28,999 --> 00:28:30,240 He filled up his Jeep. 535 00:28:30,626 --> 00:28:32,083 - Green Jeep? - That's right. 536 00:28:32,169 --> 00:28:34,832 And then he filled up some cans, like, five cans. 537 00:28:35,589 --> 00:28:37,125 Five cans, you say? 538 00:28:49,519 --> 00:28:50,805 - STEVE: Was it him? - Yeah. 539 00:28:51,980 --> 00:28:53,312 STEVE: What are you doing? 540 00:28:53,398 --> 00:28:55,355 - I'm driving. - STEVE: No, no, no, this... 541 00:28:55,442 --> 00:28:56,558 This is my rental. 542 00:28:59,613 --> 00:29:00,729 (ENGINE REVS) 543 00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:04,573 STEVE: Jesus, Dad, slow down. 544 00:29:04,660 --> 00:29:05,940 He bought five cans of gasoline. 545 00:29:05,994 --> 00:29:07,222 He's not going there to kill himself, 546 00:29:07,246 --> 00:29:09,406 - he's going to burn the house down. - That's a relief. 547 00:29:09,456 --> 00:29:11,743 He's in more danger now than he's ever been, 548 00:29:11,833 --> 00:29:14,200 and if he tries to burn it, it will defend itself. 549 00:29:14,294 --> 00:29:15,876 You really didn't hear a word I said. 550 00:29:15,963 --> 00:29:17,443 I did. Now you're gonna listen to me. 551 00:29:18,715 --> 00:29:20,206 There's a lot you don't know. 552 00:29:21,343 --> 00:29:24,632 I thought I could keep you kids safe if you didn't know, but for 20 years 553 00:29:24,721 --> 00:29:27,367 I've been holding the door closed, 'cause I knew there were monsters 554 00:29:27,391 --> 00:29:29,053 on the other side, do you understand me? 555 00:29:29,142 --> 00:29:30,383 Not even a little. 556 00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:33,845 Our family is like an unfinished meal to that house, 557 00:29:33,939 --> 00:29:36,477 and your brother is walking right back into... 558 00:29:37,985 --> 00:29:42,320 That house is the most dangerous place in the world for all of us, 559 00:29:43,198 --> 00:29:44,734 but especially for you. 560 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:46,532 - For me? - Yeah, you. 561 00:29:47,077 --> 00:29:48,077 What? Why? 562 00:29:48,203 --> 00:29:49,865 Because I read your book, 563 00:29:49,955 --> 00:29:53,665 and you are the last person that should ever step foot in that house 564 00:29:53,750 --> 00:29:56,242 because of what you wrote and how you wrote it. 565 00:29:56,586 --> 00:29:58,999 You think you know what you saw? 566 00:29:59,256 --> 00:30:02,249 - You think you know what you wrote? - What? 567 00:30:03,176 --> 00:30:04,667 I know you saw a ghost. 568 00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:07,336 - (SCOFFS) - Yeah, chapter 19. 569 00:30:07,472 --> 00:30:08,472 Yeah. 570 00:30:08,682 --> 00:30:11,425 That little story about the vanity you painted for your mother. 571 00:30:11,518 --> 00:30:13,931 That's a story about a schizophrenic woman 572 00:30:14,021 --> 00:30:15,933 having a manic episode in front of a mirror. 573 00:30:16,023 --> 00:30:17,605 You don't understand what you wrote... 574 00:30:17,691 --> 00:30:20,399 No, I saw Mom smash that glass 575 00:30:20,485 --> 00:30:22,021 - for no reason. - Before that. 576 00:30:22,112 --> 00:30:25,981 Go to the beginning, that little bit, about the vanity and why you did it. 577 00:30:26,074 --> 00:30:28,282 - You found the vanity in the game room. - Mmm-hmm. 578 00:30:28,368 --> 00:30:30,576 And you walked by the man repairing the clock, 579 00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:32,949 and then you saw your mother looking into the twins' room, 580 00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:34,281 staring at their empty beds. 581 00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:37,037 Textbook dissociative episode. She was not well. 582 00:30:37,127 --> 00:30:38,413 No, no, not her. 583 00:30:38,503 --> 00:30:40,290 The man repairing the clock. 584 00:30:41,590 --> 00:30:42,590 What about him? 585 00:30:43,258 --> 00:30:45,500 Do you know what witness marks are? 586 00:30:46,803 --> 00:30:47,839 They're scars. 587 00:30:48,555 --> 00:30:52,424 Little marks inside the clock, scrapes, lines, divots, 588 00:30:52,517 --> 00:30:54,258 from tools, gears, 589 00:30:54,644 --> 00:30:56,556 pieces removed from the clock. 590 00:30:56,646 --> 00:30:59,855 They're basically evidence of repairs that have been done to the clock 591 00:30:59,941 --> 00:31:01,227 and what the clock was. 592 00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:05,607 And with antique clocks, you almost never have a repair record, 593 00:31:05,697 --> 00:31:08,189 so you have to learn how to read the witness marks, 594 00:31:08,283 --> 00:31:10,275 so you can understand what was done to the machine 595 00:31:10,369 --> 00:31:13,032 - and how it is meant to function. - (SCOFFS) 596 00:31:13,121 --> 00:31:15,579 Witness marks tell the story of the piece, 597 00:31:15,832 --> 00:31:17,448 if you know how to read them. 598 00:31:17,542 --> 00:31:19,124 What are you trying to say? 599 00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:21,786 I had that clock evaluated by a professional 600 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,712 before we even moved into the house. 601 00:31:24,091 --> 00:31:28,051 I just wanted to know its history, know its value. 602 00:31:28,637 --> 00:31:30,799 That clock hadn't been touched since the '60s. 603 00:31:31,264 --> 00:31:33,972 You hired a slew of workers toward the end... 604 00:31:34,059 --> 00:31:35,846 Not for that clock, I didn't. Uh-uh. 605 00:31:38,021 --> 00:31:40,021 No, and if I had, it would have taken a specialist. 606 00:31:40,107 --> 00:31:42,627 There's only a handful in the world who know how to do it right, 607 00:31:42,651 --> 00:31:43,691 and they take it off-site. 608 00:31:44,194 --> 00:31:46,436 No. No one touched that clock. There was no man there, 609 00:31:46,530 --> 00:31:50,149 and certainly not one in old overalls with a handlebar mustache. 610 00:31:50,242 --> 00:31:52,074 That man wasn't there. 611 00:31:53,286 --> 00:31:54,447 You probably just forgot. 612 00:31:54,538 --> 00:31:57,030 You know, you think you're writing about your crazy mom, 613 00:31:57,124 --> 00:31:59,741 your crazy brother making scary faces in the tree house. 614 00:31:59,835 --> 00:32:02,452 You see the marks, but you don't know how to read them. 615 00:32:03,422 --> 00:32:06,165 I never built you kids a tree house. 616 00:32:07,175 --> 00:32:08,916 What? Luke was in there all the time. 617 00:32:09,010 --> 00:32:10,363 I used to go fetch him for dinner... 618 00:32:10,387 --> 00:32:12,094 We were there flipping a house. 619 00:32:12,180 --> 00:32:14,467 We were gonna be there maybe eight weeks. 620 00:32:14,558 --> 00:32:18,097 How would I even have the time to build you kids a goddamn tree house? 621 00:32:18,186 --> 00:32:20,929 - Maybe it was already there. - There was no tree house. 622 00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:24,786 Now, when we get there, you can have a look, 623 00:32:24,818 --> 00:32:25,962 but I have to tell you something. 624 00:32:25,986 --> 00:32:27,648 Your mother, she was not sick. 625 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:30,738 She wasn't crazy, and neither was your sister, 626 00:32:30,824 --> 00:32:32,941 neither is your brother, neither are you. 627 00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:34,775 Whatever you saw this week, 628 00:32:34,870 --> 00:32:37,783 and I'm very sorry you have to be taking all this in right now, 629 00:32:37,914 --> 00:32:38,914 but you have to. 630 00:32:38,999 --> 00:32:40,319 Do you understand me? You have to, 631 00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:43,334 because your brother's life depends on it. 632 00:32:44,045 --> 00:32:47,379 That house is the most dangerous place in the world for all of us, 633 00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:50,382 and that's why I told your sisters to stay put. 634 00:32:52,429 --> 00:32:53,795 You really think they will? 635 00:32:59,352 --> 00:33:00,468 Do you think he's... 636 00:33:02,314 --> 00:33:03,314 You know... 637 00:33:04,858 --> 00:33:07,100 Going there like Nell went there? 638 00:33:07,527 --> 00:33:08,893 Like going to kill himself? 639 00:33:10,238 --> 00:33:11,238 I don't know. 640 00:33:13,700 --> 00:33:14,700 No. 641 00:33:14,868 --> 00:33:15,949 I guess I don't. 642 00:33:18,205 --> 00:33:20,071 I'm not perfect, you know. 643 00:33:21,583 --> 00:33:22,583 I know. 644 00:33:23,668 --> 00:33:24,668 I'm really not. 645 00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:27,586 So go ahead, tell me. 646 00:33:29,174 --> 00:33:30,174 Try again. 647 00:33:33,386 --> 00:33:35,218 Dad and I were in your office, 648 00:33:35,305 --> 00:33:38,173 and the forever house was on the floor, 649 00:33:38,767 --> 00:33:40,474 and we heard a noise under the desk... 650 00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:42,392 Not that. You already told me that. 651 00:33:44,272 --> 00:33:45,558 I was really drunk. 652 00:33:46,358 --> 00:33:47,690 I swear to God, Theo... 653 00:33:47,776 --> 00:33:48,776 And the lights went out 654 00:33:49,778 --> 00:33:51,735 While we were down there, and I... 655 00:33:53,156 --> 00:33:55,614 Couldn't see. I was in the dark. 656 00:33:56,910 --> 00:33:59,027 I mean, like I was in the dark 657 00:33:59,704 --> 00:34:02,162 that whole night, and I just needed... 658 00:34:02,249 --> 00:34:04,411 I... I needed... I... 659 00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:07,501 I couldn't see 660 00:34:08,046 --> 00:34:09,046 him, 661 00:34:09,172 --> 00:34:10,538 if that makes any sense. 662 00:34:10,674 --> 00:34:12,381 You know what? Never mind. 663 00:34:12,884 --> 00:34:14,045 I'm trying to tell you... 664 00:34:14,135 --> 00:34:15,501 Forget I asked. 665 00:34:15,595 --> 00:34:17,928 You just don't know what I'm dealing with. 666 00:34:18,014 --> 00:34:19,300 We've all been dealing, 667 00:34:19,391 --> 00:34:20,598 and we somehow managed 668 00:34:20,684 --> 00:34:22,324 not to try to fuck each other's spouses... 669 00:34:22,394 --> 00:34:23,704 Hey, that's not what this was about. 670 00:34:23,728 --> 00:34:24,809 It just isn't. 671 00:34:24,896 --> 00:34:27,183 So, you were drunk, 672 00:34:27,274 --> 00:34:28,501 and that's supposed to be okay? 673 00:34:28,525 --> 00:34:29,891 I'm telling you. 674 00:34:30,402 --> 00:34:32,735 I don't even know why I let you come with me. 675 00:34:33,905 --> 00:34:36,773 I touched Nell's body the night before. 676 00:34:37,409 --> 00:34:38,820 The fuck is wrong with you? 677 00:34:40,662 --> 00:34:41,948 Why don't you listen? 678 00:34:42,038 --> 00:34:43,745 - I don't... No, no... - I'm telling you. 679 00:34:43,832 --> 00:34:44,832 I'm trying to tell you. 680 00:34:44,916 --> 00:34:46,908 I don't need to hear your excuses... 681 00:34:47,002 --> 00:34:48,771 - I'm not making excuses. - ...or your bullshit. 682 00:34:48,795 --> 00:34:49,795 I saw... 683 00:34:49,921 --> 00:34:50,921 (SCREAMING) 684 00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:56,800 (GASPING) 685 00:35:00,890 --> 00:35:02,882 (SEAT BELT CLICKS) 686 00:35:04,894 --> 00:35:06,226 (THEO WAILING) 687 00:35:10,567 --> 00:35:12,729 SHIRLEY: Are you okay? THEO: That was her! 688 00:35:12,819 --> 00:35:15,732 That was her! That was her! 689 00:35:16,156 --> 00:35:18,022 Did you see that, Shirley? 690 00:35:18,116 --> 00:35:20,108 Do you fucking believe that? 691 00:35:24,372 --> 00:35:25,988 You ought to know why I did it. 692 00:35:27,167 --> 00:35:29,375 I touched Nell because I had to know. 693 00:35:30,295 --> 00:35:31,911 You know what I'm talking about. 694 00:35:32,005 --> 00:35:33,462 Don't pretend that you don't. 695 00:35:34,466 --> 00:35:36,628 You know what happens when I touch people. 696 00:35:36,718 --> 00:35:38,710 A part of you knows, it always has. 697 00:35:40,847 --> 00:35:42,338 I had to know, and I... 698 00:35:43,558 --> 00:35:44,558 I touched her. 699 00:35:45,602 --> 00:35:46,602 And I felt... 700 00:35:47,937 --> 00:35:48,937 Nothing. 701 00:35:50,565 --> 00:35:52,056 Just nothing. 702 00:35:53,568 --> 00:35:56,276 And it spread, it spread everywhere in me, 703 00:35:56,363 --> 00:35:59,481 this nothing, until I couldn't feel anything anymore. 704 00:35:59,574 --> 00:36:01,110 I was just this dark, 705 00:36:01,618 --> 00:36:03,325 empty black hole. 706 00:36:03,828 --> 00:36:06,115 And I tried to fill it up, I tried to fill me back up. 707 00:36:06,206 --> 00:36:09,415 I called Trish, and she came right away, and I felt nothing. 708 00:36:09,542 --> 00:36:12,455 And then I tried to mourn at the wake and I felt nothing. 709 00:36:12,545 --> 00:36:15,913 And so I drank and I drank, and nothing worked. 710 00:36:16,007 --> 00:36:18,124 I couldn't feel anything, Shirley. 711 00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:21,552 After I touched her skin, I couldn't feel... 712 00:36:22,722 --> 00:36:23,883 Anything. 713 00:36:24,641 --> 00:36:27,725 And then we're in the basement, and the lights go out. 714 00:36:29,145 --> 00:36:30,431 And I can't see. 715 00:36:31,106 --> 00:36:32,438 And I can't feel. 716 00:36:33,483 --> 00:36:37,648 And I'm just... I'm just floating in this ocean of nothing, 717 00:36:37,737 --> 00:36:40,354 and I wonder if this is it, if this is what death is, 718 00:36:40,448 --> 00:36:44,408 just out there in the darkness, just darkness and numbness and alone, 719 00:36:44,494 --> 00:36:48,363 and I wondered if that's what she felt and that's what Mom feels, 720 00:36:48,456 --> 00:36:52,325 and it's just numb and nothing and alone. 721 00:36:56,089 --> 00:36:58,832 What if that's what it is for all of us 722 00:36:59,884 --> 00:37:01,091 when the time comes? 723 00:37:02,554 --> 00:37:06,639 And then... And then the lights came on, and there he was, and I... 724 00:37:07,225 --> 00:37:09,262 I didn't see him. I didn't see him. 725 00:37:09,352 --> 00:37:11,184 He was a light in the darkness. 726 00:37:11,271 --> 00:37:13,888 He was a life preserver in the ocean. 727 00:37:13,982 --> 00:37:17,316 I just... I reached for him because I had to feel something. 728 00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:18,643 I had to feel anything. 729 00:37:19,070 --> 00:37:21,733 (PANTING) And I didn't see him. 730 00:37:22,157 --> 00:37:24,399 I didn't... I didn't see him. I didn't see him. 731 00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:25,617 I didn't see him! 732 00:37:25,702 --> 00:37:27,193 And he stopped me. He stopped me. 733 00:37:27,287 --> 00:37:29,074 He took my hands, and he said no, 734 00:37:29,164 --> 00:37:31,531 and then I saw him, and then you walked in. 735 00:37:33,001 --> 00:37:35,209 God, I'm so glad I did it, though. 736 00:37:36,671 --> 00:37:37,912 Because it worked. 737 00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:40,376 Oh, God, it worked. 738 00:37:40,884 --> 00:37:42,420 I started feeling things again, 739 00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:45,594 and I felt... I felt shame, and I felt grief, 740 00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:47,888 and I felt... Scared. 741 00:37:47,974 --> 00:37:49,636 I felt so fucking scared 742 00:37:49,726 --> 00:37:52,560 that I was gonna lose the only sister that I had left. 743 00:37:54,606 --> 00:37:55,606 And I... 744 00:37:55,899 --> 00:37:59,392 Honestly, I had to do it, because it felt better than nothing. 745 00:37:59,527 --> 00:38:02,611 That thorough fucking shame 746 00:38:02,989 --> 00:38:06,983 was so much better than that horrible, empty nothing. 747 00:38:07,076 --> 00:38:09,739 I can't... Shirley, please. 748 00:38:12,207 --> 00:38:14,369 I am... I am so... 749 00:38:14,459 --> 00:38:16,075 I am so, so, so sorry. 750 00:38:16,878 --> 00:38:18,119 I'm so sorry. 751 00:38:19,047 --> 00:38:21,039 Please, just please. 752 00:38:26,429 --> 00:38:27,590 (THEO SNIFFLES) 753 00:38:44,155 --> 00:38:45,771 (INSECTS CHIRPING) 754 00:39:27,073 --> 00:39:28,530 (LIQUID TRICKLING) 755 00:39:58,313 --> 00:40:00,646 LUKE: One, two, three, four, 756 00:40:00,773 --> 00:40:02,389 five, six, seven. 757 00:40:07,238 --> 00:40:08,524 (BREATHING HARD) 758 00:40:08,823 --> 00:40:09,823 One, 759 00:40:10,033 --> 00:40:11,820 two, three, 760 00:40:12,368 --> 00:40:14,030 four, five, 761 00:40:14,537 --> 00:40:15,537 six... 762 00:40:16,122 --> 00:40:17,533 (BREATHING HARD) 763 00:40:24,339 --> 00:40:25,625 (GASPS) 764 00:40:51,240 --> 00:40:52,240 Mom.