1 00:02:08,483 --> 00:02:10,485 Good morning, Mother and Father. 2 00:02:10,569 --> 00:02:12,696 Good morning, Tinashe. 3 00:02:12,779 --> 00:02:14,447 Good morning, Mother and Father. 4 00:02:14,531 --> 00:02:16,283 Good morning, Omma. 5 00:02:16,366 --> 00:02:19,202 Good morning, Mother and Father, and happy anniversary. 6 00:02:19,286 --> 00:02:21,496 Yes, Meeka. 7 00:02:21,580 --> 00:02:24,165 It is our anniversary. 8 00:02:25,876 --> 00:02:28,211 AKEEM: Today, we celebrate 9 00:02:28,295 --> 00:02:31,798 30 years of Zamundan prosperity, 10 00:02:31,882 --> 00:02:35,552 30 years of service to our great nation 11 00:02:35,635 --> 00:02:39,556 and 30 years of delicious fast food. 12 00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:43,143 -We want to welcome you all to McDowell's Zamunda. - 13 00:02:46,229 --> 00:02:49,065 The McDowell's menu is in no way 14 00:02:49,149 --> 00:02:51,526 influenced by the McDonald's menu. 15 00:02:51,610 --> 00:02:53,445 They've got Egg McMuffins. 16 00:02:53,528 --> 00:02:55,322 We've got Egg McStuffins. 17 00:02:55,405 --> 00:02:56,990 MAURICE: We are also celebrating 18 00:02:57,073 --> 00:03:02,412 the arrival of our new Beyond Big Mick Burger! 19 00:03:02,495 --> 00:03:06,333 And it's all part of my lovely granddaughter's campaign 20 00:03:06,416 --> 00:03:08,543 to reduce our, uh... our what? 21 00:03:08,627 --> 00:03:10,170 Carbon footprint. 22 00:03:10,253 --> 00:03:13,381 And without using any animal by-products. 23 00:03:13,465 --> 00:03:16,259 It's just good old-fashioned grass. 24 00:03:18,470 --> 00:03:20,472 -So there's no meat? -There's no meat. 25 00:03:22,098 --> 00:03:24,768 MAURICE: Beautiful, leafy taste. 26 00:03:24,851 --> 00:03:26,937 So delicious. 27 00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:29,064 Maybe it would taste much better with a... 28 00:03:29,147 --> 00:03:31,816 Pepsi. 29 00:03:31,900 --> 00:03:35,820 Pepsi, the official soft drink of McDowell's Zamunda. 30 00:03:35,904 --> 00:03:38,114 - 31 00:03:39,366 --> 00:03:41,660 - 32 00:04:03,682 --> 00:04:05,100 You look tired, Father. 33 00:04:05,183 --> 00:04:07,644 Maybe he needs a nap. 34 00:04:11,022 --> 00:04:13,066 I am the heir to the throne of Zamunda. 35 00:04:13,149 --> 00:04:15,360 I shall not be shamed by my two daughters. 36 00:04:15,443 --> 00:04:16,611 TINASHE: Three daughters! 37 00:04:35,714 --> 00:04:37,465 -Yeah! - 38 00:04:37,549 --> 00:04:40,552 Behold! Prince Akeem in his natural element, 39 00:04:40,635 --> 00:04:43,847 cowering at the mercy of the women in his life. 40 00:04:43,930 --> 00:04:45,890 Semmi, perhaps you would like to spar with my daughters 41 00:04:45,974 --> 00:04:47,559 and teach them some combinations. 42 00:04:48,601 --> 00:04:50,020 No doubt, you are 43 00:04:50,103 --> 00:04:51,521 their best teacher, Your Majesty. 44 00:04:51,604 --> 00:04:52,897 It is my daughters that teach me 45 00:04:52,981 --> 00:04:54,232 in the languages of the modern world. 46 00:04:54,315 --> 00:04:55,942 For instance, 47 00:04:56,026 --> 00:04:57,652 are my princely robes not on fleek? 48 00:04:57,736 --> 00:05:00,280 Oh, my God, Father. To be on fleek is no more. 49 00:05:00,363 --> 00:05:01,906 Really? 50 00:05:03,533 --> 00:05:05,035 I rather enjoyed being on fleek. 51 00:05:05,118 --> 00:05:06,578 SEMMI: Your father has sent for you. 52 00:05:06,661 --> 00:05:08,913 He has an urgent matter to discuss with you. 53 00:05:08,997 --> 00:05:12,042 Tell me, Semmi, this urgent matter-- 54 00:05:12,125 --> 00:05:14,669 does it concern my marriage to a suitor 55 00:05:14,753 --> 00:05:17,172 who shall one day sit on the throne of Zamunda? 56 00:05:17,255 --> 00:05:19,049 I will talk to Father alone. 57 00:05:24,345 --> 00:05:26,473 And how is my father today? 58 00:05:26,556 --> 00:05:29,100 He has already ordered my execution three times. 59 00:05:29,184 --> 00:05:31,436 Oh, then he must be feeling better. 60 00:05:31,519 --> 00:05:32,687 Prince Akeem! 61 00:05:32,771 --> 00:05:34,439 Nexdorian soldiers. 62 00:05:34,522 --> 00:05:36,483 I could not stop. They are coming. 63 00:05:56,002 --> 00:06:01,549 Presenting the supreme leader of Nexdoria, 64 00:06:01,633 --> 00:06:04,886 the conqueror of countries and hearts... 65 00:06:06,054 --> 00:06:07,931 ...the wrestler of lions, 66 00:06:08,014 --> 00:06:10,100 the tamer of elephants, 67 00:06:10,183 --> 00:06:12,685 the inspiration for Mufasa... 68 00:06:16,147 --> 00:06:21,444 ...the most well-endowed man in Africa, 69 00:06:21,528 --> 00:06:24,072 General... 70 00:06:24,155 --> 00:06:26,407 Izzi. 71 00:06:38,670 --> 00:06:41,506 Prince Akeem. 72 00:06:41,589 --> 00:06:43,508 Whoa, look at you. 73 00:06:46,094 --> 00:06:51,057 My condolences this day for your father, the king. 74 00:06:51,141 --> 00:06:53,935 Many thanks for your well wishes, General Izzi, 75 00:06:54,018 --> 00:06:56,312 but as you know, my father still breathes. 76 00:06:56,396 --> 00:06:59,691 Barely, but for how long? 77 00:06:59,774 --> 00:07:01,401 Why have you come here, General? 78 00:07:01,484 --> 00:07:03,862 30 years ago, you left my sister at the altar. 79 00:07:03,945 --> 00:07:05,321 Oh, here we go. 80 00:07:05,405 --> 00:07:06,406 Now look at she. 81 00:07:12,203 --> 00:07:14,706 Imani, always a pleasure. 82 00:07:16,249 --> 00:07:20,503 If you had married her, our countries would be united, 83 00:07:20,587 --> 00:07:23,756 putting an end to decades of suffering for all our people. 84 00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:25,383 AKEEM: General, throughout the years, 85 00:07:25,466 --> 00:07:28,011 we have tried to help Nexdoria many times. 86 00:07:28,094 --> 00:07:30,972 I would like nothing more than to help your country 87 00:07:31,055 --> 00:07:32,849 relieve its burden of poverty. 88 00:07:32,932 --> 00:07:36,102 Zamunda can only afford so much. 89 00:07:36,186 --> 00:07:38,646 I did not come here for money. 90 00:07:38,730 --> 00:07:41,149 I came here for blood. 91 00:07:43,526 --> 00:07:45,320 But not the murder kind. 92 00:07:45,403 --> 00:07:47,822 No, no, no, family blood. 93 00:07:47,906 --> 00:07:50,241 Marriage blood, yes? 94 00:07:51,951 --> 00:07:57,081 Has your daughter considered the proposal from my son? 95 00:07:59,500 --> 00:08:01,169 My fellow player. 96 00:08:01,252 --> 00:08:02,879 Hey! 97 00:08:02,962 --> 00:08:04,881 Yes. 98 00:08:04,964 --> 00:08:07,967 I do not think that he and Meeka will ever happen. 99 00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:12,430 Ever. 100 00:08:17,352 --> 00:08:20,688 IZZI: There is Bopoto, my daughter. 101 00:08:20,772 --> 00:08:22,565 Perhaps your son can be... 102 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:26,486 But you don't have one. 103 00:08:26,569 --> 00:08:28,655 The shame must be unbearable, 104 00:08:28,738 --> 00:08:31,115 as a man, as a king, 105 00:08:31,199 --> 00:08:33,993 without an heir with a nut sack. 106 00:08:36,663 --> 00:08:39,165 Thank you for your visit, General. 107 00:08:39,249 --> 00:08:40,959 Seeing you brings to mind 108 00:08:41,042 --> 00:08:43,211 all of my father's favorite curses for you. 109 00:08:44,796 --> 00:08:48,174 To call you a shit stain brought him much joy. 110 00:08:48,258 --> 00:08:51,052 I advise you to reconsider my offer. 111 00:08:51,135 --> 00:08:54,639 It is better to be bound by blood and marriage 112 00:08:54,722 --> 00:08:59,018 than be divided by blood and war. 113 00:09:00,812 --> 00:09:02,480 Eh? 114 00:09:02,563 --> 00:09:04,649 - 115 00:09:04,732 --> 00:09:06,526 Hey! 116 00:09:14,284 --> 00:09:17,287 KING JAFFE JOFFER: My time has come, my son. 117 00:09:17,370 --> 00:09:21,916 You must heed my words before I'm gone. 118 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,751 Please don't leave us so soon, Your Highness. 119 00:09:23,835 --> 00:09:25,169 Zamunda needs you. 120 00:09:25,253 --> 00:09:27,046 Oh, shut up, Semmi! 121 00:09:27,130 --> 00:09:29,299 You don't have to suck up to me anymore. 122 00:09:29,382 --> 00:09:30,842 I'll be dead soon. 123 00:09:30,925 --> 00:09:33,428 Why couldn't it be you, Semmi? 124 00:09:33,511 --> 00:09:34,804 BABA: Yes, Your Majesty. 125 00:09:34,887 --> 00:09:36,889 His life is far too worthless. 126 00:09:36,973 --> 00:09:39,934 His death would make me smile. 127 00:09:40,018 --> 00:09:41,227 AKEEM: Baba. 128 00:09:43,396 --> 00:09:45,815 The throne must pass to a male heir. 129 00:09:45,898 --> 00:09:47,233 AKEEM: Yes, Father. 130 00:09:47,317 --> 00:09:48,693 A male heir. 131 00:09:49,694 --> 00:09:51,404 Once again, I apologize to you 132 00:09:51,487 --> 00:09:54,032 for all of the shame and disappointment 133 00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:56,576 that my offspring's genetic makeup has caused you. 134 00:09:56,659 --> 00:10:01,789 My son, it appears your shortcomings in masculinity 135 00:10:01,873 --> 00:10:04,125 have turned out to be unfounded. 136 00:10:04,208 --> 00:10:06,294 BABA: I seen it 137 00:10:06,377 --> 00:10:08,171 in a vision. 138 00:10:09,547 --> 00:10:11,549 You gots a son. 139 00:10:13,968 --> 00:10:15,136 It is true. 140 00:10:16,304 --> 00:10:18,723 You have a son, Akeem. 141 00:10:20,725 --> 00:10:22,226 A bastard son. 142 00:10:22,310 --> 00:10:24,312 That is impossible. 143 00:10:24,395 --> 00:10:27,273 The only woman I have ever lain with is Lisa. 144 00:10:27,357 --> 00:10:30,943 Father, I did not sow my royal oats. 145 00:10:32,987 --> 00:10:34,364 JAFFE JOFFER: Semmi! 146 00:10:34,447 --> 00:10:35,782 Hmm? 147 00:10:35,865 --> 00:10:38,284 Tell Akeem the truth at once. 148 00:10:42,288 --> 00:10:46,167 Remember in Queens, night after night, 149 00:10:46,250 --> 00:10:48,336 you were looking for the perfect woman? 150 00:10:48,419 --> 00:10:49,796 Yes. 151 00:10:49,879 --> 00:10:53,174 Well, I too was-- how can I say this? 152 00:10:54,759 --> 00:10:57,929 I was looking for the perfect vagina. 153 00:11:00,473 --> 00:11:01,974 Or any vagina. 154 00:11:03,643 --> 00:11:07,105 We scoured the far reaches of that loathsome city, 155 00:11:07,188 --> 00:11:09,774 searching rather unsuccessfully for the woman of your dreams. 156 00:11:09,857 --> 00:11:12,485 My name is Peaches, and I'm the best 157 00:11:12,568 --> 00:11:15,029 to feel my breast. 158 00:11:15,113 --> 00:11:17,532 I've been watching you all evening, 159 00:11:17,615 --> 00:11:19,992 and I want to tear you apart. 160 00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:22,995 And your friend, too. 161 00:11:25,748 --> 00:11:27,375 I am going to mingle. 162 00:11:27,458 --> 00:11:29,710 SEMMI: I had had enough. 163 00:11:29,794 --> 00:11:32,797 And I realized, if I was ever going to sow my oats 164 00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:34,340 on American soil, 165 00:11:34,424 --> 00:11:36,259 I was going to need to find someone 166 00:11:36,342 --> 00:11:37,844 to take care of you. 167 00:11:37,927 --> 00:11:40,388 But don't worry, I never broke our oath 168 00:11:40,471 --> 00:11:42,473 of keeping our identity a secret. 169 00:11:42,557 --> 00:11:44,142 A prince? 170 00:11:45,184 --> 00:11:47,186 Yes, a prince. 171 00:11:47,270 --> 00:11:50,731 But he cannot know that you know who he is. 172 00:11:50,815 --> 00:11:54,235 -We are undercover Africans. - 173 00:11:54,318 --> 00:11:57,071 Africans undercover. Oh, that's good, baby. 174 00:11:57,155 --> 00:11:59,907 You ain't got to lie like that to get some of this ass. 175 00:11:59,991 --> 00:12:01,868 But you know what? I'll bump uglies with your homeboy. 176 00:12:01,951 --> 00:12:04,537 Just let me go throw up real quick, and, uh... 177 00:12:04,620 --> 00:12:07,582 and then we can, you know, get it crackin'. 178 00:12:11,335 --> 00:12:13,880 SEMMI: I may not have been thinking straight. 179 00:12:13,963 --> 00:12:16,048 In my defense, it had been weeks 180 00:12:16,132 --> 00:12:19,385 since the last time I was tended to by the royal bathers. 181 00:12:19,469 --> 00:12:22,346 But at the time, it seemed like a good plan. 182 00:12:25,475 --> 00:12:27,226 Mmm. 183 00:12:27,310 --> 00:12:30,938 I hope you like, uh, pumpkin pie. 184 00:12:31,022 --> 00:12:34,650 'Cause you gonna get a whole slice. 185 00:12:36,986 --> 00:12:39,447 That is not what happened, Father. 186 00:12:39,530 --> 00:12:42,200 I remember meeting this morally bereft woman, 187 00:12:42,283 --> 00:12:44,452 but there was no inappropriate mating. 188 00:12:44,535 --> 00:12:46,621 She offered me some of her ceremonial herbs. 189 00:12:50,708 --> 00:12:51,959 Princey. 190 00:12:52,043 --> 00:12:53,794 AKEEM: And then, if memory serves, 191 00:12:53,878 --> 00:12:55,713 a wild boar burst into the room. 192 00:12:55,796 --> 00:12:58,049 It came and jumped into my lap. 193 00:12:58,132 --> 00:12:59,759 And then it began to ram me. 194 00:12:59,842 --> 00:13:02,512 -And ram me and ram me, ramming and ramming! - 195 00:13:02,595 --> 00:13:04,388 And a foul... 196 00:13:12,063 --> 00:13:13,814 You fool, what have you done to me?! 197 00:13:13,898 --> 00:13:15,483 -Go on, son. - 198 00:13:15,566 --> 00:13:16,609 -Just kill him. -Kill him! 199 00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:21,364 -So I actually have a son? -A bastard son. 200 00:13:22,365 --> 00:13:23,866 - 201 00:13:23,950 --> 00:13:26,869 Why was his existence hidden from me all these years? 202 00:13:26,953 --> 00:13:31,374 I was hoping you would put a stem on an apple of your own. 203 00:13:31,457 --> 00:13:36,170 The royal artist made a sketch of my vision. 204 00:13:37,797 --> 00:13:40,508 This is your bastard. 205 00:13:40,591 --> 00:13:42,552 Hear me, Prince Akeem. 206 00:13:42,635 --> 00:13:46,305 General Izzi, he will use the passing of our great king 207 00:13:46,389 --> 00:13:49,350 as a sign to attack the weak one. 208 00:13:49,433 --> 00:13:51,894 The weak one? 209 00:13:51,978 --> 00:13:53,729 Am I the weak one? 210 00:13:53,813 --> 00:13:56,482 I spoiled you, my son. 211 00:13:56,566 --> 00:14:01,070 You are not strong or ruthless as I am. 212 00:14:01,153 --> 00:14:03,447 You will be assassinated. 213 00:14:06,158 --> 00:14:07,410 Within a week. 214 00:14:07,493 --> 00:14:09,161 Month, tops. 215 00:14:09,245 --> 00:14:12,415 Prince Akeem, follow the thunderbird. 216 00:14:12,498 --> 00:14:14,458 It will take you to your boy. 217 00:14:14,542 --> 00:14:15,918 Follow the thunderbird? 218 00:14:16,002 --> 00:14:17,461 This is madness. 219 00:14:17,545 --> 00:14:19,338 If my family were to ever find out about this... 220 00:14:19,422 --> 00:14:21,132 You will be safe. 221 00:14:21,215 --> 00:14:24,093 Our people will be safe. 222 00:14:24,176 --> 00:14:27,513 It is the only way. You must. 223 00:14:34,437 --> 00:14:35,688 Easy, my father. 224 00:14:35,771 --> 00:14:38,107 The end is near. 225 00:14:39,734 --> 00:14:41,944 My funeral... 226 00:14:42,028 --> 00:14:44,739 should be spectacular. 227 00:14:46,866 --> 00:14:48,659 Yeah, it will, Papa. 228 00:14:48,743 --> 00:14:53,247 Let's have it now while I'm alive. 229 00:14:55,041 --> 00:14:57,084 It shall be glorious. 230 00:14:59,170 --> 00:15:01,213 MORGAN FREEMAN: In the beginning, 231 00:15:01,297 --> 00:15:02,340 the universe began. 232 00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:06,052 Stars, planets, 233 00:15:06,135 --> 00:15:08,095 all the visible objects in the universe 234 00:15:08,179 --> 00:15:12,767 came to be with a single purpose: 235 00:15:12,850 --> 00:15:16,812 to prepare the way for the grandest creation of all, 236 00:15:16,896 --> 00:15:19,774 the birth of Jaffe Joffer. 237 00:15:25,613 --> 00:15:26,822 FREEMAN: But today, 238 00:15:26,906 --> 00:15:30,117 we gather for a moment or two 239 00:15:30,201 --> 00:15:32,411 to give much respect due 240 00:15:32,495 --> 00:15:36,374 to the king who made a difference in our world. 241 00:15:36,457 --> 00:15:40,670 Zamundans, I give you... 242 00:15:40,753 --> 00:15:42,129 En Vogue. 243 00:15:42,213 --> 00:15:43,881 -Oh. - 244 00:15:43,964 --> 00:15:45,466 - 245 00:15:50,513 --> 00:15:52,306 what a king 246 00:15:54,266 --> 00:15:55,768 mighty good king... 247 00:15:55,851 --> 00:15:58,312 And now... Salt-N-Pepa! 248 00:16:00,147 --> 00:16:03,359 but his voice got bass 249 00:16:03,442 --> 00:16:05,528 with a Denzel face 250 00:16:05,611 --> 00:16:08,489 face on his own money 251 00:16:08,572 --> 00:16:10,783 and he's got his own country 252 00:16:10,866 --> 00:16:13,911 every time I see him 253 00:16:13,994 --> 00:16:17,039 other kings couldn't be him 254 00:16:17,123 --> 00:16:19,625 but even in jeans 255 00:16:19,709 --> 00:16:22,086 the king of my dreams 256 00:16:22,169 --> 00:16:23,671 - 257 00:16:23,754 --> 00:16:25,631 what a king 258 00:16:29,260 --> 00:16:31,554 what a king 259 00:16:33,139 --> 00:16:34,807 - 260 00:16:50,322 --> 00:16:52,825 -MAN: Zamunda! - 261 00:16:58,539 --> 00:17:01,500 With the passing of the great king, 262 00:17:01,584 --> 00:17:04,587 the world changed forever. 263 00:17:05,921 --> 00:17:10,092 When he died, no one ever smiled again. 264 00:17:10,176 --> 00:17:13,012 Vacations were canceled. 265 00:17:13,095 --> 00:17:14,597 Holidays ignored. 266 00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:16,223 GLADYS KNIGHT: 267 00:17:16,307 --> 00:17:18,476 People didn't even have sex anymore. 268 00:17:22,229 --> 00:17:26,650 Our great king had gone away forever. 269 00:17:28,527 --> 00:17:29,987 Gladys Knight. 270 00:17:38,454 --> 00:17:40,456 the midnight train 271 00:17:40,539 --> 00:17:42,208 -Son. 272 00:17:42,291 --> 00:17:44,084 Yes, my father. 273 00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:50,466 -Remember what I told you. 274 00:17:52,635 --> 00:17:54,386 I'm going to die now. 275 00:17:55,805 --> 00:17:57,848 Come now, Father. Everything is going to be... 276 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:05,523 that midnight train 277 00:18:05,606 --> 00:18:07,107 -Father? - 278 00:18:07,191 --> 00:18:09,693 the midnight train 279 00:18:09,777 --> 00:18:11,779 - 280 00:18:13,364 --> 00:18:15,616 only hope 281 00:18:17,993 --> 00:18:20,746 who can't have a son 282 00:18:50,609 --> 00:18:53,612 AKEEM: I just lost the greatest man in my life. 283 00:18:53,696 --> 00:18:56,740 Soon, Nexdorian warriors will assassinate me. 284 00:18:58,075 --> 00:19:01,161 And I have a child on the other side of the world. 285 00:19:01,245 --> 00:19:03,205 Take heart in your grief. 286 00:19:03,289 --> 00:19:04,623 You are king now. 287 00:19:04,707 --> 00:19:05,958 Be as your father. 288 00:19:06,041 --> 00:19:07,543 Bark orders at me. 289 00:19:07,626 --> 00:19:09,879 Throw things at me. It will make you happy. 290 00:19:14,842 --> 00:19:17,052 Prepare the royal jet. 291 00:19:18,721 --> 00:19:20,931 We are going back to America. 292 00:19:22,808 --> 00:19:24,643 Oh, hell no, Your Majesty! 293 00:19:24,727 --> 00:19:26,562 Now, I will find this bastard of Queens, 294 00:19:26,645 --> 00:19:28,772 and I will look into his eyes, and if I see 295 00:19:28,856 --> 00:19:31,525 the strength of our ancestors, I shall know he is of my blood. 296 00:19:31,609 --> 00:19:33,569 Then he must come back to Zamunda 297 00:19:33,652 --> 00:19:35,237 and take the princely test. 298 00:19:35,321 --> 00:19:37,990 Heir to the throne of Zamunda, 299 00:19:38,073 --> 00:19:40,159 born in America... 300 00:19:41,911 --> 00:19:43,913 ...land of opportunity. 301 00:19:46,916 --> 00:19:49,209 What kind of man do you think he is? 302 00:19:49,293 --> 00:19:51,879 This bastard. 303 00:19:51,962 --> 00:19:55,049 If he has Joffer blood running through his veins, 304 00:19:55,132 --> 00:19:58,218 I'm sure he's destined for greatness. 305 00:20:02,848 --> 00:20:04,850 - 306 00:20:06,185 --> 00:20:08,103 You think you look respectable? 307 00:20:08,187 --> 00:20:09,813 I just want to look employable. 308 00:20:09,897 --> 00:20:11,523 Ain't nobody gonna hire you over all these 309 00:20:11,607 --> 00:20:13,150 Mitt-Romney-looking-ass shmiggas. 310 00:20:13,233 --> 00:20:15,903 LAVELLE: Why not? I got sales experience. 311 00:20:15,986 --> 00:20:17,988 Which reminds me-- St. John's is at the Garden. 312 00:20:18,072 --> 00:20:19,990 Now, I want you to take these tickets up there. 313 00:20:20,074 --> 00:20:21,992 Sell 'em at full freight until tip-off. 314 00:20:22,076 --> 00:20:24,787 I can't do this shit no more, man. I really can't. 315 00:20:24,870 --> 00:20:27,331 This hand-to-mouth shit, it's got to stop, all right? 316 00:20:27,414 --> 00:20:28,666 I got to get solid. 317 00:20:28,749 --> 00:20:30,084 I'm in my 30s now. 318 00:20:30,167 --> 00:20:31,710 Since when? 319 00:20:31,794 --> 00:20:33,128 Today! 320 00:20:34,129 --> 00:20:35,714 Today. 321 00:20:35,798 --> 00:20:37,257 Today is my birthday. 322 00:20:37,341 --> 00:20:38,884 And you forgot. 323 00:20:38,968 --> 00:20:41,762 Listen to me, young Jedi, okay? 324 00:20:41,845 --> 00:20:43,639 What you need to do is learn to relax. 325 00:20:43,722 --> 00:20:45,265 I'm your uncle. 326 00:20:45,349 --> 00:20:47,476 You stay on the ground with me. You dig it, son? 327 00:20:47,559 --> 00:20:48,686 Uh, L. Junson. 328 00:20:48,769 --> 00:20:51,397 Don't use white voice. 329 00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:53,023 Present. 330 00:20:54,316 --> 00:20:55,693 I do know smartphones. 331 00:20:55,776 --> 00:20:57,528 I know technology, all right? 332 00:20:57,611 --> 00:21:00,280 I'm well-versed in emerging trends. 333 00:21:00,364 --> 00:21:02,616 And I'll tell you this, too. 334 00:21:02,700 --> 00:21:05,369 If you hire me, I won't let you down. 335 00:21:05,452 --> 00:21:07,329 That's really inspiring. 336 00:21:07,413 --> 00:21:09,957 So, uh, just give me a chance, Mr. Duke. 337 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:11,959 Oh, my God, please. My father is Mr. Duke. 338 00:21:12,042 --> 00:21:14,878 Uh, and my, uh, grandfather and great-uncle, 339 00:21:14,962 --> 00:21:17,214 who founded Duke & Duke. 340 00:21:17,297 --> 00:21:19,258 -Uh, please just call me Calvin. -All right. 341 00:21:19,341 --> 00:21:20,509 I'm calling you Calvin. 342 00:21:20,592 --> 00:21:23,303 I noticed here, under education, that-- 343 00:21:23,387 --> 00:21:26,056 did it say that you-you didn't graduate college? 344 00:21:26,140 --> 00:21:27,725 Well, yeah, see, I was three credits short 345 00:21:27,808 --> 00:21:29,101 from getting my, uh, business degree, 346 00:21:29,184 --> 00:21:30,936 but then my mom got laid off, and, uh, 347 00:21:31,020 --> 00:21:33,647 you know, I had to, uh, drop out to help with the rent. 348 00:21:33,731 --> 00:21:36,150 -Is she addicted to drugs or... -What? 349 00:21:36,233 --> 00:21:38,527 -She have gambling issues or... -No, man. 350 00:21:38,610 --> 00:21:40,863 Pops, uh, in the picture or... 351 00:21:42,197 --> 00:21:44,616 -My dad was not in the picture. -Ah. 352 00:21:45,951 --> 00:21:47,411 You know, I went to boarding school, 353 00:21:47,494 --> 00:21:49,079 so there were months where I didn't see 354 00:21:49,163 --> 00:21:52,249 my parents, except for breaks, and, uh, it can be hard. 355 00:21:52,332 --> 00:21:55,461 I mean, I've read a lot of studies that say 356 00:21:55,544 --> 00:21:57,921 that not having a dominant male figure at home, 357 00:21:58,005 --> 00:22:00,049 it's so detrimental to a child. 358 00:22:00,132 --> 00:22:02,634 -Do they say that? -Yeah, they say that. 359 00:22:02,718 --> 00:22:04,511 -Who? -Scientists. 360 00:22:04,595 --> 00:22:06,972 -Bill Nye did a... -The Science Guy. 361 00:22:07,056 --> 00:22:08,557 Your guy, uh, Neil deGrasse Tyson. 362 00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,851 -Do you think that not having 363 00:22:10,934 --> 00:22:15,439 that kind of male role model could put you at a disadvantage? 364 00:22:15,522 --> 00:22:18,650 No more of a disadvantage than having a father 365 00:22:18,734 --> 00:22:20,694 who handed you your position. 366 00:22:20,778 --> 00:22:22,196 "Handed"? 367 00:22:22,279 --> 00:22:24,740 I-I was not handed anything. 368 00:22:24,823 --> 00:22:26,992 So you're saying Daddy never donated a building 369 00:22:27,076 --> 00:22:29,036 to get you into an Ivy League school? 370 00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:30,662 No. Yeah. 371 00:22:30,746 --> 00:22:33,540 Well, there was a small off-campus library. 372 00:22:33,624 --> 00:22:36,085 And Daddy never had to sneak you into 373 00:22:36,168 --> 00:22:38,045 an overpriced rehab facility 374 00:22:38,128 --> 00:22:40,130 to cover up a cocaine addiction, Calvin? 375 00:22:40,214 --> 00:22:42,424 It was oxy, and my mom took me. 376 00:22:44,426 --> 00:22:45,803 Kiss my ass, Calvin. 377 00:22:45,886 --> 00:22:47,221 Hey, you know something? 378 00:22:47,304 --> 00:22:48,889 You've been judging me since I walked in here. 379 00:22:48,972 --> 00:22:51,558 Which sucks because I am so motivated. 380 00:22:51,642 --> 00:22:53,435 You know what, I-I just can't wait for them to find 381 00:22:53,519 --> 00:22:55,896 blackface photos of you from the office party. 382 00:22:55,979 --> 00:22:58,816 I was Will Smith's Aladdin, okay? 383 00:22:58,899 --> 00:23:00,317 Peace, Calvin. 384 00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:02,319 There was blueface over the black... 385 00:23:09,660 --> 00:23:11,328 - 386 00:23:18,585 --> 00:23:20,462 - 387 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:30,556 Much has changed in Queens. 388 00:23:34,726 --> 00:23:36,562 Yes, but some things have not. 389 00:23:38,147 --> 00:23:40,732 CLARENCE: Floyd "Money" Mayweather ain't shit! 390 00:23:40,816 --> 00:23:42,442 He beat that Filipino boy ass. 391 00:23:42,526 --> 00:23:44,319 "Pack-a-quando," "Pack-a-mondo." 392 00:23:44,403 --> 00:23:47,614 Wh-Whatever his name is, he beat that boy ass, Clarence. 393 00:23:47,698 --> 00:23:51,201 And he beat that meshuggener Conor McGregor, the Irishman. 394 00:23:51,285 --> 00:23:53,579 Yeah, 'cause he had to do that for the blacks. 395 00:23:53,662 --> 00:23:55,581 In this political climate, Black man can't be taking 396 00:23:55,664 --> 00:23:56,999 no ass-whipping from no white man. 397 00:23:57,082 --> 00:23:58,125 Would've caused a riot. 398 00:23:58,208 --> 00:23:59,418 I was ready to riot anyway. 399 00:23:59,501 --> 00:24:01,170 I wanted to get me one of them flat-screen TVs. 400 00:24:05,966 --> 00:24:08,594 Well, I'll be damned! Look who done come up in here. 401 00:24:08,677 --> 00:24:11,722 Hey, it's Kunta Kinte and Ebola. 402 00:24:11,805 --> 00:24:14,349 -Famine and Blood Diamond. -Nelson Mandela and Winnie. 403 00:24:16,977 --> 00:24:18,520 Those hungry babies with the flies on their face. 404 00:24:18,604 --> 00:24:20,189 -Hey. Oh, oh, oh, oh. -SAUL: Whoa, whoa. 405 00:24:20,272 --> 00:24:21,732 CLARENCE: That's too much, man. You stepped over the line, now. 406 00:24:21,815 --> 00:24:23,233 We don't be talking that kind of shit about the hungry babies. 407 00:24:23,317 --> 00:24:25,277 You gonna have to get out my chair talking that kind of shit. 408 00:24:25,360 --> 00:24:26,695 Politically incorrect. 409 00:24:26,778 --> 00:24:28,488 Somebody need to whip your ass. 410 00:24:28,572 --> 00:24:30,532 Mm-hmm. Get up and whip him, Sweets. 411 00:24:30,616 --> 00:24:32,326 Hey, don't be putting the money in my hand all rough. 412 00:24:32,409 --> 00:24:33,827 Take your ass out of here. You buy you a Flowbee 413 00:24:33,911 --> 00:24:35,454 and cut your own damn hair from now on. 414 00:24:35,537 --> 00:24:37,998 Right now I could rip a new ass in that kid. 415 00:24:38,081 --> 00:24:39,124 It is so good to see you. 416 00:24:39,208 --> 00:24:41,126 Your neighborhood seems to be thriving. 417 00:24:41,210 --> 00:24:42,294 Oh, that's that gentrification. 418 00:24:42,377 --> 00:24:43,962 You know, when the colored man here, 419 00:24:44,046 --> 00:24:45,297 this neighborhood didn't have shit. 420 00:24:45,380 --> 00:24:47,007 When the white man move in, 421 00:24:47,090 --> 00:24:49,468 they got their coffeehouses and their dog parks, 422 00:24:49,551 --> 00:24:53,180 and my brownstone on Foch Boulevard is worth $10 million. 423 00:24:53,263 --> 00:24:55,849 Your brownstone ain't worth no ten million. 424 00:24:55,933 --> 00:24:57,559 -My brownstone is, too, worth $10 million! - 425 00:24:57,643 --> 00:25:00,187 And I'm gonna sell it and get me a Tesla. 426 00:25:00,270 --> 00:25:01,980 America has certainly changed since our last visit. 427 00:25:02,064 --> 00:25:05,901 Your Black president finally united this great country. 428 00:25:05,984 --> 00:25:07,611 Yeah, but it's all gone to hell now. 429 00:25:07,694 --> 00:25:10,239 We all gonna die. Just don't know how. 430 00:25:10,322 --> 00:25:11,823 SAUL: It's gonna be the Nazis. 431 00:25:11,907 --> 00:25:13,492 Nazis are back, 432 00:25:13,575 --> 00:25:16,245 but now they dress like the Best Buy Geek Squad 433 00:25:16,328 --> 00:25:18,372 and they want to kill people. 434 00:25:18,455 --> 00:25:21,917 Anybody could be a Nazi. You ever notice that, Prince? 435 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:23,835 Akeem now is an African king. 436 00:25:23,919 --> 00:25:25,087 CLARENCE: Well, I'll be damned. 437 00:25:25,170 --> 00:25:27,756 You got any kids? I got kids. 438 00:25:27,839 --> 00:25:30,968 In fact, I got one granddaughter used to be my grandson. 439 00:25:31,051 --> 00:25:33,428 They can turn your penis into a vagina now. 440 00:25:34,554 --> 00:25:35,806 It's science. 441 00:25:35,889 --> 00:25:37,349 MORRIS: I bet they could fix 442 00:25:37,432 --> 00:25:39,393 them long, sloppy titties y'all got in Africa. 443 00:25:39,476 --> 00:25:40,978 You can't even squeeze a tit nowadays. 444 00:25:41,061 --> 00:25:42,312 It'll get you fired. 445 00:25:42,396 --> 00:25:44,439 I'm so sorry you can no longer indiscriminately 446 00:25:44,523 --> 00:25:46,566 touch a woman's body at your every whim. 447 00:25:46,650 --> 00:25:49,027 Oh, it's okay. I got it in when I was young. 448 00:25:55,117 --> 00:25:57,703 So what you doing back here, Idiot Amin? 449 00:25:57,786 --> 00:25:59,496 I am actually here with a purpose. 450 00:25:59,579 --> 00:26:02,040 I have just discovered that I may have a bastard son 451 00:26:02,124 --> 00:26:04,418 here in this land, conceived during my last visit. 452 00:26:04,501 --> 00:26:08,046 The long arm of the family court bring 'em back every time. 453 00:26:08,130 --> 00:26:10,674 How much child support she getting from you? 454 00:26:10,757 --> 00:26:12,301 The king pays no child support. 455 00:26:12,384 --> 00:26:15,554 No child support for 30 years, and you came back? 456 00:26:15,637 --> 00:26:17,639 -You's a dummy! - 457 00:26:17,723 --> 00:26:20,684 My son has been without a father for far too long. 458 00:26:21,893 --> 00:26:23,437 I've seen him. 459 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,814 That's the kid that's always out in front of the Garden. 460 00:26:25,897 --> 00:26:27,733 He scalp tickets down at Madison Square Garden. 461 00:26:27,816 --> 00:26:30,444 He probably over there right now working the St. John's game. 462 00:26:30,527 --> 00:26:32,029 Their mascot is a big turkey. 463 00:26:32,112 --> 00:26:34,573 Oh, hell no, it ain't. It's a thunderbird. 464 00:26:36,408 --> 00:26:38,327 BOTH: "Follow the thunderbird." 465 00:26:38,410 --> 00:26:40,037 LAVELLE: Hey! Come on, y'all! 466 00:26:40,120 --> 00:26:42,831 I got five! Got five! 467 00:26:42,914 --> 00:26:46,126 Got five tickets to the Middle Tennessee game tonight! 468 00:26:46,209 --> 00:26:49,171 Come on, y'all! You want it, I got it! 469 00:26:49,254 --> 00:26:50,881 Hey, I got five... Hey, I got five tickets 470 00:26:50,964 --> 00:26:52,049 to the Middle Tennessee State game, man. 471 00:26:52,132 --> 00:26:53,467 -No. -Come on, yo. 472 00:26:53,550 --> 00:26:55,719 What better way to spend your night than paying to watch 473 00:26:55,802 --> 00:26:56,928 unpaid student athletes? 474 00:27:00,098 --> 00:27:01,391 Semmi, look. 475 00:27:04,436 --> 00:27:07,064 It is my potential bastard son. 476 00:27:08,190 --> 00:27:09,483 Akeem. 477 00:27:09,566 --> 00:27:11,109 You are king of Zamunda. 478 00:27:11,193 --> 00:27:13,612 Your noble visage is known around the world. 479 00:27:13,695 --> 00:27:17,949 You cannot stroll down the street like we did years ago. 480 00:27:19,910 --> 00:27:21,661 Come on, Middle Tennessee State. 481 00:27:21,745 --> 00:27:23,080 Come on, y'all. 482 00:27:23,163 --> 00:27:25,290 They got a seven-foot-five center. 483 00:27:25,374 --> 00:27:27,584 Catch him before his knees pop. 484 00:27:30,212 --> 00:27:31,963 Hello. 485 00:27:33,465 --> 00:27:35,008 You want some tickets, man? 486 00:27:35,092 --> 00:27:36,718 No, thank you. 487 00:27:38,303 --> 00:27:42,057 I am King Akeem Joffer, king of Zamunda. 488 00:27:42,140 --> 00:27:44,142 And I believe that you... 489 00:27:45,769 --> 00:27:47,312 What is your name? 490 00:27:47,396 --> 00:27:49,773 It's Lavelle. 491 00:27:49,856 --> 00:27:52,609 -Lavelle Junson. -...Lavelle Junson, 492 00:27:52,692 --> 00:27:55,404 are the heir to the throne of Zamunda. 493 00:27:56,822 --> 00:28:00,700 My firstborn child and my only son. 494 00:28:02,244 --> 00:28:05,247 Yes, my son. 495 00:28:05,330 --> 00:28:07,249 MARY: Are you putting the candles on the cake? 496 00:28:07,332 --> 00:28:10,419 31 candles. I need 31 candles on that cake. 497 00:28:10,502 --> 00:28:11,962 Oh, well, there's only ten in the pack, so... 498 00:28:12,045 --> 00:28:14,548 What do you mean, only ten? Why is there only ten? 499 00:28:14,631 --> 00:28:16,133 'Cause I did not have enough change left over 500 00:28:16,216 --> 00:28:17,467 to get another pack of candles. 501 00:28:17,551 --> 00:28:19,052 It's your nephew's birthday. 502 00:28:19,136 --> 00:28:20,429 Look, just please try to make 31 candles. 503 00:28:20,512 --> 00:28:22,472 Cut the candles in half. 504 00:28:22,556 --> 00:28:24,516 That's just 20. It's... 505 00:28:26,059 --> 00:28:27,269 Cuzzo! Happy birthday! 506 00:28:27,352 --> 00:28:30,021 -ALL: Happy birthday! - 507 00:28:30,105 --> 00:28:31,440 Happy birthday, cuz! 508 00:28:31,523 --> 00:28:33,275 Hey, baby, happy birthday! 509 00:28:38,363 --> 00:28:40,657 Oh, my God. 510 00:28:40,740 --> 00:28:42,325 My African. 511 00:28:42,409 --> 00:28:44,202 I told you he was gonna come back! 512 00:28:44,286 --> 00:28:46,496 Boy, why you ain't tell me you was bringing company? 513 00:28:46,580 --> 00:28:48,248 -I would've cleaned up. -LAVELLE: Uh-huh. 514 00:28:48,331 --> 00:28:50,792 -So you know this man? -I definitely know this man. 515 00:28:50,876 --> 00:28:52,419 I know this man all the way live. 516 00:28:52,502 --> 00:28:54,588 You know, I know this man all up in the crevice. 517 00:28:54,671 --> 00:28:56,798 -AKEEM: Yes, it's, uh, 518 00:28:56,882 --> 00:28:58,884 very good to see you again... 519 00:29:01,678 --> 00:29:04,181 -Mary. -Mary. 520 00:29:04,264 --> 00:29:06,433 -Like the Virgin. -Oh. Okay, baby. All right. 521 00:29:06,516 --> 00:29:08,477 -Virgin? Not our Mary. -She ain't no virgin. 522 00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,270 -You know that. -MARY: You know what? That's right. 523 00:29:10,353 --> 00:29:11,730 Y'all was doing that little weak pickup game. 524 00:29:11,813 --> 00:29:13,899 I think he was supposed to be, like, 525 00:29:13,982 --> 00:29:15,609 the prince or something. 526 00:29:15,692 --> 00:29:17,235 He is not a prince anymore. 527 00:29:17,319 --> 00:29:18,778 He is our king. 528 00:29:18,862 --> 00:29:21,656 -Oh, he's a king now. -A king? 529 00:29:23,783 --> 00:29:26,870 So, you still got that smooth... scepter? 530 00:29:26,953 --> 00:29:28,121 LAVELLE: Hey. 531 00:29:28,205 --> 00:29:30,540 No. Nobody want to hear that on my birthday. 532 00:29:30,624 --> 00:29:32,751 -Mary. Mary. -LAVELLE: Yo, Mom, for real, 533 00:29:32,834 --> 00:29:33,960 is this dude my father? 534 00:29:34,044 --> 00:29:36,338 Father? Boy... 535 00:29:37,422 --> 00:29:38,590 MARY: Mm. 536 00:29:39,758 --> 00:29:42,135 Oh, boy, yeah, that might... he might be. 537 00:29:42,219 --> 00:29:44,387 He does... Y'all know I was a ho, though, right? 538 00:29:44,471 --> 00:29:46,139 Y'all know I was out in these streets? 539 00:29:46,223 --> 00:29:47,599 -You was a ho. -MARY: I wasn't selling it. 540 00:29:47,682 --> 00:29:48,725 I should've been selling it. 541 00:29:48,808 --> 00:29:50,477 In one of them Fashion Nova dresses. 542 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:52,312 -'Cause I was giving it away, for sure. -AKEEM: Mary. 543 00:29:52,395 --> 00:29:53,939 I've come back for my son. 544 00:29:54,022 --> 00:29:57,400 To have him take his rightful place on the throne. 545 00:29:57,484 --> 00:29:58,985 REEM: Ain't nothing happening. 546 00:29:59,069 --> 00:30:01,196 Zamunda, Wakanda, Connecticut-- I don't know where you from. 547 00:30:01,279 --> 00:30:02,614 -Exactly. -But I've been a force 548 00:30:02,697 --> 00:30:04,282 in this boy's life since he was born. 549 00:30:04,366 --> 00:30:05,992 Please. 550 00:30:06,076 --> 00:30:07,619 It is the boy's birthright. 551 00:30:07,702 --> 00:30:09,371 I'm only giving him an opportunity 552 00:30:09,454 --> 00:30:10,956 to have a better life. 553 00:30:11,039 --> 00:30:12,791 No. Hey, man, for real, look. 554 00:30:12,874 --> 00:30:14,417 I don't know who you think you are, 555 00:30:14,501 --> 00:30:16,044 but I'm-a tell you who I am, man. 556 00:30:16,127 --> 00:30:17,796 I'm Lavelle Junson, a'ight? 557 00:30:17,879 --> 00:30:19,589 And I don't need no handout. 558 00:30:22,050 --> 00:30:23,176 Hmm? Wait a minute. 559 00:30:23,260 --> 00:30:24,511 -Wait. -SEMMI: My mistake. 560 00:30:24,594 --> 00:30:26,263 Continue. 561 00:30:26,346 --> 00:30:27,556 Oh, my God. 562 00:30:29,307 --> 00:30:31,142 LIVIA: Do the right thing. Go ahead, boy. 563 00:30:34,354 --> 00:30:35,730 MARY: Ooh. 564 00:30:36,773 --> 00:30:39,234 Are those coins? Are those gold bars? 565 00:30:39,317 --> 00:30:41,611 There's cash. 566 00:30:41,695 --> 00:30:43,822 Hey, yo, uh, 567 00:30:43,905 --> 00:30:45,865 you know, I'm thinking, who am I 568 00:30:45,949 --> 00:30:48,243 to say no to becoming a prince? 569 00:30:49,661 --> 00:30:51,871 Ma, pack your bags, man. We out. 570 00:30:51,955 --> 00:30:55,292 Amen! Okay, so do I get my own hut with my private shaman? 571 00:30:55,375 --> 00:30:59,546 We are only offering to take Lavelle back to Zamunda. 572 00:30:59,629 --> 00:31:01,131 LAVELLE: Uh-uh. Ain't happening like that, man. 573 00:31:01,214 --> 00:31:02,716 I'm not hopping on some plane, 574 00:31:02,799 --> 00:31:05,093 flying across the world without my mother. 575 00:31:05,176 --> 00:31:07,178 All right? She coming. 576 00:31:10,515 --> 00:31:12,475 -So be it. -LAVELLE: So be it. 577 00:31:12,559 --> 00:31:14,144 -And so it is. A'ight. 578 00:31:14,227 --> 00:31:16,396 -Okay, baby. 579 00:31:16,479 --> 00:31:18,023 Hey, Mary, you just gonna leave? 580 00:31:18,106 --> 00:31:20,066 Y'all know my PlayStation ain't going nowhere. 581 00:31:20,150 --> 00:31:21,568 I mean, what about all your stuff? 582 00:31:21,651 --> 00:31:24,070 It all sucks! Y'all can have it. 583 00:31:25,614 --> 00:31:28,783 Inform General Izzi that I have retrieved my son from America. 584 00:31:28,867 --> 00:31:30,994 Yes, Your Majesty. 585 00:31:31,077 --> 00:31:33,038 Hey, we packed. 586 00:31:33,121 --> 00:31:34,831 -Ah. 587 00:31:34,914 --> 00:31:37,334 Yes, the limousine is waiting for you right downstairs. 588 00:31:37,417 --> 00:31:39,252 -Limo? We got a limo, man. -What's that? Limo! 589 00:31:39,336 --> 00:31:41,254 MARY: I ain't been in a limo since '00. 590 00:31:41,338 --> 00:31:43,131 -LAVELLE: Hey. What's up? -MARY: What's up, fellas? 591 00:31:43,214 --> 00:31:45,592 How y'all doing? Y'all so cute. 592 00:31:45,675 --> 00:31:48,345 Do you think Lisa will be understanding? 593 00:31:48,428 --> 00:31:50,722 What is not to understand? 594 00:31:50,805 --> 00:31:52,015 You lied to me! 595 00:31:52,098 --> 00:31:53,642 I did not exactly lie to you. 596 00:31:53,725 --> 00:31:54,851 This reeks of Semmi. 597 00:31:54,934 --> 00:31:57,562 Ah, well, I don't want to shift blame, 598 00:31:57,646 --> 00:31:59,356 but, yeah, it... yes, you're right 599 00:31:59,439 --> 00:32:01,775 when you assume that Semmi had something to do with this. 600 00:32:01,858 --> 00:32:03,360 I should've known about this. 601 00:32:05,403 --> 00:32:07,489 I did not know what to do. 602 00:32:07,572 --> 00:32:09,032 I was only trying to do what is right. 603 00:32:09,115 --> 00:32:11,951 For our family or for Zamunda? 604 00:32:13,620 --> 00:32:15,080 Okay. 605 00:32:15,163 --> 00:32:17,540 You have an illegitimate son. 606 00:32:17,624 --> 00:32:19,125 You wouldn't be the first king to have one. 607 00:32:19,209 --> 00:32:20,251 That is true. 608 00:32:20,335 --> 00:32:22,128 Besides, we hadn't even met yet. 609 00:32:22,212 --> 00:32:24,756 Exactly. We hadn't met yet. It's not like I cheated on you. 610 00:32:24,839 --> 00:32:26,716 This happened before we even met. 611 00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:28,927 And it's not like you're the first man I've ever been with. 612 00:32:29,010 --> 00:32:30,136 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 613 00:32:30,220 --> 00:32:31,888 What did you just say about the other men? 614 00:32:31,971 --> 00:32:33,515 So I guess, uh, 615 00:32:33,598 --> 00:32:35,350 you didn't really do anything wrong, did you? 616 00:32:35,433 --> 00:32:38,061 It was a totally honest mistake that can happen to anyone 617 00:32:38,144 --> 00:32:40,021 whose best friend introduced him to a strange woman 618 00:32:40,105 --> 00:32:42,440 who drugged him and had sex with him. 619 00:32:42,524 --> 00:32:44,067 But what did you say-- the other men 620 00:32:44,150 --> 00:32:45,443 that you were with, the... 621 00:32:49,364 --> 00:32:51,449 From here on out, 622 00:32:51,533 --> 00:32:53,910 I'm gonna need you to be honest with me. 623 00:32:53,993 --> 00:32:56,663 -No more surprises. -I promise. 624 00:32:56,746 --> 00:32:58,957 No more surprises, my sweet. 625 00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,459 Never again shall there be another surprise. 626 00:33:01,543 --> 00:33:04,421 Ooh, ooh! What?! 627 00:33:06,172 --> 00:33:08,341 MARY: I got to get some shots for the Gram. 628 00:33:08,425 --> 00:33:10,468 -LAVELLE: Goddamn! - 629 00:33:10,552 --> 00:33:11,886 -LAVELLE: Oh, my goodness! -MARY: Hashtag "family"! 630 00:33:11,970 --> 00:33:13,513 That's the last surprise. 631 00:33:13,596 --> 00:33:15,306 -Hey! What's up, y'all? -Hey! 632 00:33:15,390 --> 00:33:17,267 -What's up, fam? - 633 00:33:17,350 --> 00:33:19,185 Look, I'm gonna hug you 'cause I'm a hugger. 634 00:33:19,269 --> 00:33:20,729 Hey, Queen! 635 00:33:20,812 --> 00:33:23,606 I'm sorry I slept with your man. 636 00:33:23,690 --> 00:33:26,067 It's okay. It's okay. 637 00:33:26,151 --> 00:33:28,737 -What is going on here? -AKEEM: Oh, children. 638 00:33:28,820 --> 00:33:31,990 Children, I would love for you to meet your brother. 639 00:33:32,073 --> 00:33:35,160 Uh, Lavelle, uh, Princess Tinashe. 640 00:33:35,243 --> 00:33:37,871 Tinashe, this is your bastard brother from America. 641 00:33:37,954 --> 00:33:39,289 And, Princess Omma, 642 00:33:39,372 --> 00:33:42,625 this is your bastard brother from America. 643 00:33:42,709 --> 00:33:45,628 Now, this is my eldest daughter, Princess Meeka. 644 00:33:45,712 --> 00:33:47,046 Meeka, this is your bast... 645 00:33:47,130 --> 00:33:49,048 Bastard brother. They know. 646 00:33:49,132 --> 00:33:52,010 I think they get the idea. So, how you doing? 647 00:33:52,093 --> 00:33:54,053 MARY: And my name is Mary. How you doing? 648 00:33:54,137 --> 00:33:56,014 Just call me your second mom. 649 00:33:56,097 --> 00:33:58,600 But you really don't have to, girls. 650 00:33:58,683 --> 00:34:01,603 I mean, but you should, though, 'cause I kind of am. 651 00:34:01,686 --> 00:34:03,062 AKEEM: Well, look at us. 652 00:34:03,146 --> 00:34:05,523 Just one big, happy 653 00:34:05,607 --> 00:34:08,276 Zamundan-American aristocratic blended family. 654 00:34:08,359 --> 00:34:11,696 Ah, just like the Kardashians! 655 00:34:29,172 --> 00:34:31,925 And that is the story of the bunny and the bear. 656 00:34:32,008 --> 00:34:33,968 Good class today, children. 657 00:34:34,052 --> 00:34:35,637 Okay, go play now. 658 00:34:35,720 --> 00:34:37,597 Play with your grenades and your Kalashnikov. 659 00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:39,641 Sifo, don't mess with the sarin. 660 00:34:39,724 --> 00:34:41,392 Okay? It is dangerous. 661 00:34:41,476 --> 00:34:44,646 General Izzi, we have just been informed 662 00:34:44,729 --> 00:34:49,609 King Akeem has returned from America with a son. 663 00:34:49,692 --> 00:34:51,611 A son? 664 00:34:53,613 --> 00:34:55,782 A son. 665 00:35:10,588 --> 00:35:12,131 MARY: I am so hungry, 666 00:35:12,215 --> 00:35:14,133 I could eat the ass out of a zebra. 667 00:35:17,303 --> 00:35:21,057 So, Lavelle, what did you do in Queens 668 00:35:21,140 --> 00:35:23,518 before you found out you were a prince? 669 00:35:23,601 --> 00:35:25,895 Oh, I wasn't doing that much, you know what I mean? 670 00:35:25,979 --> 00:35:28,731 Just sort of, like, in between opportunities. 671 00:35:28,815 --> 00:35:30,608 -You know? -MARY: Let me tell you something, baby. 672 00:35:30,692 --> 00:35:33,027 -Hmm? -You a prince now. Okay? 673 00:35:33,111 --> 00:35:35,947 And one day, all this is gonna be yours. 674 00:35:36,030 --> 00:35:37,866 This long-ass table, all this food, 675 00:35:37,949 --> 00:35:40,118 this whole damn kingdom. 676 00:35:40,201 --> 00:35:43,329 I always thought that Meeka was going to be queen. 677 00:35:43,413 --> 00:35:45,248 OMMA: A woman isn't allowed to rule Zamunda. 678 00:35:45,331 --> 00:35:46,332 It's the law. 679 00:35:46,416 --> 00:35:49,627 So it's going to be this guy? 680 00:35:53,298 --> 00:35:55,550 I have lost my appetite. 681 00:35:55,633 --> 00:35:56,843 MARY: Mm. 682 00:36:00,805 --> 00:36:02,348 MARY: Mm. 683 00:36:02,432 --> 00:36:05,143 So, um, is anybody gonna tell me 684 00:36:05,226 --> 00:36:07,520 why these mashed potatoes is black? 685 00:36:07,604 --> 00:36:09,063 It's caviar. 686 00:36:09,147 --> 00:36:11,357 -It's cava-what? -Caviar, Mom. 687 00:36:11,441 --> 00:36:13,443 You know, our cousin named that. 688 00:36:19,490 --> 00:36:21,159 You sure you're in the right room? 689 00:36:21,242 --> 00:36:24,621 Mm, Lisa, please. I'm getting it from everywhere. 690 00:36:24,704 --> 00:36:26,623 Meeka is so upset. 691 00:36:30,627 --> 00:36:32,795 Did it ever occur to you that maybe 692 00:36:32,879 --> 00:36:35,173 Meeka might have wanted to be your heir? 693 00:36:35,256 --> 00:36:38,468 She's practically trained for it her whole life. 694 00:36:40,219 --> 00:36:42,430 This boy would not have been my first choice, 695 00:36:42,513 --> 00:36:44,891 but what can I do? 696 00:36:44,974 --> 00:36:48,144 He is my firstborn, my only son, 697 00:36:48,227 --> 00:36:50,146 and you know the law. 698 00:36:50,229 --> 00:36:51,856 That is not you talking. 699 00:36:51,940 --> 00:36:54,609 That is your father. 700 00:36:54,692 --> 00:36:56,319 Good night. 701 00:37:03,117 --> 00:37:05,662 Uh, Lisa, I was, uh, wondering, 702 00:37:05,745 --> 00:37:07,914 uh, I just recently returned from a trip 703 00:37:07,997 --> 00:37:11,501 that was most tiresome, and I thought maybe, perhaps, 704 00:37:11,584 --> 00:37:14,087 if you were in the mood... 705 00:37:14,170 --> 00:37:16,464 Yeah, perhaps it was poor timing on my behalf 706 00:37:16,547 --> 00:37:19,008 to even suggest such a thing. 707 00:37:19,092 --> 00:37:21,469 Good night, my sweet. 708 00:37:21,552 --> 00:37:24,055 Uh, s-sweet dreams, my sweet. 709 00:37:30,436 --> 00:37:32,605 This is bullshit. 710 00:37:41,030 --> 00:37:42,573 Mm. 711 00:37:42,657 --> 00:37:44,283 Good morning. 712 00:37:46,077 --> 00:37:47,537 - 713 00:37:50,206 --> 00:37:54,127 Good morning, Zamunda...! 714 00:37:58,006 --> 00:37:59,465 Yeah! 715 00:38:00,675 --> 00:38:03,261 -Oh! -ALL: Good morning, my prince. 716 00:38:04,387 --> 00:38:06,848 "My prince." I like that. 717 00:38:06,931 --> 00:38:08,725 Would you like us to bathe you? 718 00:38:08,808 --> 00:38:10,810 Bathe me? 719 00:38:10,893 --> 00:38:13,021 Um... 720 00:38:13,104 --> 00:38:15,231 you gonna need a ruler 721 00:38:15,314 --> 00:38:17,358 all night, never lose, bruh 722 00:38:19,527 --> 00:38:21,237 All three of you? 723 00:38:27,076 --> 00:38:28,995 Naked? 724 00:38:30,538 --> 00:38:32,915 Okay. All right, well... 725 00:38:32,999 --> 00:38:35,585 I'll be... I'll be right back. 726 00:38:35,668 --> 00:38:36,919 Ma? 727 00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:38,921 Ma! 728 00:38:39,005 --> 00:38:40,757 Oh, hey. Hey, hey, look, um... 729 00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:42,759 I'm freaking out right now because these three girls, 730 00:38:42,842 --> 00:38:45,053 they in my room right now, and they just offered to bathe me. 731 00:38:45,136 --> 00:38:46,804 Okay, baby, first of all, calm down. 732 00:38:46,888 --> 00:38:48,598 Okay? You know we in another country. 733 00:38:48,681 --> 00:38:51,267 And you know they have different traditions 734 00:38:51,350 --> 00:38:53,644 and customs, the way that they do stuff. 735 00:38:53,728 --> 00:38:56,230 You need to roll with it. This is a princely thing. 736 00:38:56,314 --> 00:38:58,066 They bathe you, okay? 737 00:38:58,149 --> 00:38:59,442 -Yes. -So be a prince. 738 00:38:59,525 --> 00:39:00,777 "Be a prince." 739 00:39:00,860 --> 00:39:02,445 -Now, you go enjoy that bath. -All right. 740 00:39:02,528 --> 00:39:04,781 -All right, Ma. Thank you. -Go get washed. 741 00:39:15,333 --> 00:39:16,626 The royal privates are clean, ma'am. 742 00:39:16,709 --> 00:39:18,336 Mm. 743 00:39:18,419 --> 00:39:20,963 Just one more time, just-just to make sure. 744 00:39:29,597 --> 00:39:30,598 Oh. 745 00:39:30,681 --> 00:39:32,350 Good morning, Your Royal Highness. 746 00:39:32,433 --> 00:39:33,726 My name is Mirembe. 747 00:39:33,810 --> 00:39:35,853 I will be your royal groomer. 748 00:39:35,937 --> 00:39:37,980 Please allow me the honor 749 00:39:38,064 --> 00:39:40,608 of trimming your most precious hairs. 750 00:39:40,691 --> 00:39:42,860 Um... 751 00:39:42,944 --> 00:39:45,613 The ones atop your head, sir. 752 00:39:45,696 --> 00:39:47,865 -Precious head of hair. Okay. All right. -Yes. 753 00:39:47,949 --> 00:39:50,868 Surely, the royal bathers have cleansed you thoroughly, 754 00:39:50,952 --> 00:39:53,579 judging by the smile on your face. 755 00:39:56,833 --> 00:40:00,044 Now, please sit back and relax. 756 00:40:13,182 --> 00:40:15,101 -Yo! Man, look at you. - 757 00:40:15,184 --> 00:40:17,019 -You look beautiful. -Thank you. 758 00:40:17,103 --> 00:40:19,355 -And you look so fre... -Right? Right? 759 00:40:19,438 --> 00:40:20,857 -Right? -What's this? What's this? 760 00:40:20,940 --> 00:40:23,192 Oh, yeah, I got a royal barber, and she hooked me up. 761 00:40:25,570 --> 00:40:27,780 -We got to go. -Right. Got that thing. 762 00:40:39,834 --> 00:40:44,463 Presenting Lavelle Junson of Queens! 763 00:40:45,715 --> 00:40:47,258 And my moms. 764 00:40:47,341 --> 00:40:50,553 And his moms. 765 00:40:52,555 --> 00:40:55,683 Oh, hey, baby's daddy king. 766 00:40:55,766 --> 00:40:57,602 LAVELLE: Step-mama queen, what up? 767 00:40:57,685 --> 00:41:00,271 Mother, don't you have a dress like that? 768 00:41:00,354 --> 00:41:02,023 MARY: Thank you for the borrow. 769 00:41:02,106 --> 00:41:03,232 The royal tailors had to add 770 00:41:03,316 --> 00:41:04,692 some extra material to make it fit. 771 00:41:04,775 --> 00:41:06,527 You got a dope closet, baby. 772 00:41:06,611 --> 00:41:08,529 And who told you you could go through my closet? 773 00:41:08,613 --> 00:41:11,324 Well, well, I was just thinking, since we're related, 774 00:41:11,407 --> 00:41:15,036 uh, maybe that we could share a couple of... 775 00:41:15,119 --> 00:41:16,704 Why your mama so uppity? 776 00:41:16,787 --> 00:41:18,581 What is "uppity"? 777 00:41:18,664 --> 00:41:20,124 I am not uppity. 778 00:41:20,208 --> 00:41:21,918 Uppity bitch say what? 779 00:41:22,001 --> 00:41:23,544 -What? - 780 00:41:23,628 --> 00:41:24,921 You said it. 781 00:41:27,089 --> 00:41:28,925 We do that in Queens. 782 00:41:29,008 --> 00:41:31,344 I cannot stress how important it is that you're here 783 00:41:31,427 --> 00:41:32,929 right now at this moment. 784 00:41:33,012 --> 00:41:34,513 For educational purposes. 785 00:41:34,597 --> 00:41:36,307 At any moment, a world leader can come 786 00:41:36,390 --> 00:41:38,935 bursting through the door with some pressing, 787 00:41:39,018 --> 00:41:42,396 uh, time-sensitive propositions. 788 00:41:45,650 --> 00:41:48,861 - 789 00:42:00,998 --> 00:42:04,752 General Izzi, what a totally unexpected surprise. 790 00:42:04,835 --> 00:42:08,631 King Akeem, I have come to give you congratulations 791 00:42:08,714 --> 00:42:11,259 for locating one of your lost sperm. 792 00:42:11,342 --> 00:42:14,720 I too wonder about my own stray bullets. 793 00:42:14,804 --> 00:42:17,014 Thank you for your kind words. 794 00:42:17,098 --> 00:42:20,226 Ah, but I've not come with just words. 795 00:42:20,309 --> 00:42:25,064 I came with a gift for your new prince. 796 00:42:29,652 --> 00:42:34,031 With your permission, King Akeem. 797 00:42:34,115 --> 00:42:35,866 My permission is granted. 798 00:42:58,889 --> 00:43:00,683 -IZZI: I would like to 799 00:43:00,766 --> 00:43:04,478 present to you my daughter, Bopoto! 800 00:43:34,925 --> 00:43:36,510 or unnerve... 801 00:43:36,594 --> 00:43:37,803 Oh, that's my song! 802 00:43:37,887 --> 00:43:39,096 -That's her song. -That's Prince! 803 00:43:39,180 --> 00:43:40,765 -LAVELLE: That's her song. 804 00:43:40,848 --> 00:43:43,184 gettin' served 805 00:43:43,267 --> 00:43:45,061 you-know-what 806 00:43:48,147 --> 00:43:49,774 to say what's right 807 00:43:49,857 --> 00:43:51,901 is wrong 808 00:43:53,361 --> 00:43:57,073 in a one-night stand 809 00:43:57,156 --> 00:43:59,241 - 810 00:44:02,912 --> 00:44:06,123 and a man be a man 811 00:44:08,376 --> 00:44:10,795 baby, here I am 812 00:44:12,129 --> 00:44:13,381 Damn! 813 00:44:19,512 --> 00:44:21,138 Look here, boy. Look here. 814 00:44:21,222 --> 00:44:22,932 Pay attention to me. You know this song. 815 00:44:23,015 --> 00:44:25,643 You go put some purple on that ho! 816 00:44:25,726 --> 00:44:26,977 Do it for our country. 817 00:44:29,688 --> 00:44:31,649 nah, little cutie 818 00:44:31,732 --> 00:44:33,651 - 819 00:44:33,734 --> 00:44:35,069 I was just thinkin' 820 00:44:37,988 --> 00:44:40,741 we can continue outside 821 00:44:40,825 --> 00:44:43,411 against a parking meter 822 00:44:43,494 --> 00:44:45,788 like I was stripping a Peter 823 00:44:47,581 --> 00:44:49,792 I'm a talented boy. 824 00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:54,255 What's up? 825 00:44:55,464 --> 00:44:59,135 King Akeem, shall we join our families in marriage 826 00:44:59,218 --> 00:45:00,928 under one flag 827 00:45:01,011 --> 00:45:05,474 by uniting your bastard with my Bopoto? 828 00:45:08,769 --> 00:45:10,688 General... 829 00:45:10,771 --> 00:45:13,190 as you know, I have very, very strong opinions 830 00:45:13,274 --> 00:45:15,484 when it comes to arranged marriages. 831 00:45:15,568 --> 00:45:19,488 True love is the bedrock of my kingdom. 832 00:45:24,118 --> 00:45:26,495 But if this is something that Lavelle desires, 833 00:45:26,579 --> 00:45:28,247 who am I to stand in his way? 834 00:45:28,330 --> 00:45:29,623 -Wait, what? -Father. 835 00:45:30,666 --> 00:45:33,544 Lavelle, is this what you want? 836 00:45:33,627 --> 00:45:36,088 Yeah. I'm 'bout it. 837 00:45:36,172 --> 00:45:37,756 Then it is settled! 838 00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:39,425 Then let us proceed! 839 00:45:39,508 --> 00:45:42,344 A semiautomatic shotgun wedding it will be! 840 00:45:49,518 --> 00:45:53,355 Remember your father's final words. 841 00:45:53,439 --> 00:45:56,775 The boy must pass the princely test. 842 00:45:56,859 --> 00:46:00,821 To forget the princely test would be to spit in the faces 843 00:46:00,905 --> 00:46:04,158 of the great Joffers who have come before you. 844 00:46:05,159 --> 00:46:06,785 Whose auntie is this? 845 00:46:08,245 --> 00:46:09,788 I give you a week. 846 00:46:11,624 --> 00:46:14,585 I wouldn't want to go back to plotting your death. 847 00:46:16,170 --> 00:46:17,254 Zoot! 848 00:46:17,338 --> 00:46:18,506 -SOLDIERS: Zoot! -What's "zoot"? 849 00:46:18,589 --> 00:46:20,090 Y'all leaving? Does that mean "leave"? 850 00:46:26,931 --> 00:46:29,391 I'll see you in one week, my prince. 851 00:46:29,475 --> 00:46:31,101 LAVELLE: A'ight. 852 00:46:32,895 --> 00:46:36,357 -Father, can we talk about this? -There is nothing to talk about. 853 00:46:36,440 --> 00:46:38,859 MEEKA: Nexdoria is our greatest threat. 854 00:46:38,943 --> 00:46:41,779 To broker a peace hinging on the testosterone-clouded whims 855 00:46:41,862 --> 00:46:44,490 of a son you barely even know is foolish. 856 00:46:44,573 --> 00:46:46,534 I said there is nothing to talk about. 857 00:46:55,125 --> 00:46:57,169 JAFFE JOFFER This is ZNN. 858 00:46:57,253 --> 00:46:58,796 Good evening, my neighbors. 859 00:46:58,879 --> 00:47:00,756 I'm Totatsi Bibinyana. 860 00:47:00,839 --> 00:47:03,050 In a most promising twist, 861 00:47:03,133 --> 00:47:05,886 the Zamunda News Network has confirmed 862 00:47:05,970 --> 00:47:08,806 that King Akeem has a son. 863 00:47:08,889 --> 00:47:10,432 While it is too early to determine 864 00:47:10,516 --> 00:47:12,685 whether the boy possesses any strength, intelligence 865 00:47:12,768 --> 00:47:14,436 or capability whatsoever, 866 00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:17,231 what we do know is that he is a man. 867 00:47:17,314 --> 00:47:19,984 And as far as Zamundan royalty is concerned, 868 00:47:20,067 --> 00:47:21,569 that's good enough. 869 00:47:23,404 --> 00:47:24,613 The princely test has three parts. 870 00:47:24,697 --> 00:47:26,156 -Okay. Uh-huh. -Culture, 871 00:47:26,240 --> 00:47:29,743 critical thinking and, more importantly, courage. 872 00:47:29,827 --> 00:47:31,287 AKEEM: Where do we begin? 873 00:47:31,370 --> 00:47:35,624 Teach the young prince how to walk like royalty. 874 00:47:35,708 --> 00:47:37,334 That is what we will do. 875 00:47:37,418 --> 00:47:40,045 We will teach you how to walk like a prince. 876 00:47:40,129 --> 00:47:41,880 Yo, what's wrong with the way I walk now? 877 00:47:41,964 --> 00:47:43,716 You walk like an American pimp. 878 00:47:43,799 --> 00:47:45,884 You dress like a slave from the future. 879 00:47:45,968 --> 00:47:47,553 Old Jar Jar Binks lookin' ass. 880 00:47:47,636 --> 00:47:49,763 Here, in this hall, 881 00:47:49,847 --> 00:47:54,184 you will come face-to-face with your Zamundan heritage. 882 00:47:54,268 --> 00:47:56,228 Let us begin. 883 00:47:57,229 --> 00:47:58,439 Jompu Joffer. 884 00:47:58,522 --> 00:47:59,815 Jampu... 885 00:47:59,898 --> 00:48:02,318 -Jakoof Joffer. -Jujkoof... 886 00:48:02,401 --> 00:48:04,361 Mighty Jokeim Joffer, 887 00:48:04,445 --> 00:48:06,530 the most handsome of all the Joffers. 888 00:48:08,324 --> 00:48:09,742 Clench your backside. 889 00:48:09,825 --> 00:48:12,202 -Put your shoulders back. -Mm-hmm. 890 00:48:12,286 --> 00:48:13,412 -Put your chin up. -Mm-hmm. 891 00:48:13,495 --> 00:48:16,081 Suck in your stomach and walk thusly. 892 00:48:17,124 --> 00:48:18,917 Now? Walk? Okay. 893 00:48:20,044 --> 00:48:22,630 -This is a regal gait. -Okay. 894 00:48:24,214 --> 00:48:25,674 Stop! Don't... 895 00:48:25,758 --> 00:48:27,468 Tuck in your backside. 896 00:48:27,551 --> 00:48:29,136 And who is this? 897 00:48:29,219 --> 00:48:30,387 Uh, that's Jappa Joffer. 898 00:48:30,471 --> 00:48:32,264 -No. -Jabba the Hutt Joffer. 899 00:48:32,348 --> 00:48:34,600 -No. -Jumpin' Jack Flash Joffer. 900 00:48:34,683 --> 00:48:35,726 No. 901 00:48:35,809 --> 00:48:37,311 -Gerald Levert Joffer? -No. 902 00:48:37,394 --> 00:48:39,146 -Jimmie "JJ" Walker Joffer? -No. 903 00:48:39,229 --> 00:48:41,106 -Jabberwocky Joffer. -No. 904 00:48:41,190 --> 00:48:42,191 LAVELLE: James Brown Joffer. 905 00:48:42,274 --> 00:48:43,400 Hey! 906 00:48:50,783 --> 00:48:53,077 LAVELLE: All right, y'all, what am I doing out here? 907 00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:54,495 I'm hungry. I'm... 908 00:48:54,578 --> 00:48:57,247 I-I'm late for my bath. What am I looking for? 909 00:48:57,331 --> 00:48:58,999 -Hmm? - 910 00:48:59,083 --> 00:49:01,293 Oh! That's a damn lion, bruh! 911 00:49:01,377 --> 00:49:04,713 Only when you can retrieve the whiskers from a resting lion 912 00:49:04,797 --> 00:49:06,548 will you be ready to become prince. 913 00:49:11,261 --> 00:49:12,471 This is a joke. 914 00:49:12,554 --> 00:49:14,264 This is a joke, 'cause I know 915 00:49:14,348 --> 00:49:16,141 your soft ass ain't never do nothing like that. 916 00:49:16,225 --> 00:49:17,893 Oh, yes, I did. 917 00:49:17,976 --> 00:49:20,854 -On my very first attempt. -Well... 918 00:49:20,938 --> 00:49:23,857 Yes. First attempt. Very brave. 919 00:49:23,941 --> 00:49:26,068 AKEEM: You will need the courage of all your ancestors... 920 00:49:26,151 --> 00:49:28,195 A machete? A rocket launcher? What you got? 921 00:49:28,278 --> 00:49:30,656 ...and the cunningness of your Western ways. 922 00:49:30,739 --> 00:49:33,117 And these. 923 00:49:39,957 --> 00:49:41,750 Thank you. 924 00:49:51,427 --> 00:49:53,303 Ain't this a bitch. 925 00:49:55,806 --> 00:49:57,224 LAVELLE: I just don't belong here. 926 00:49:57,307 --> 00:49:59,852 You are the son of the king of Zamunda. 927 00:50:01,729 --> 00:50:03,605 You come from a long line of Joffers, and... 928 00:50:03,689 --> 00:50:06,692 I come from a long line of broke-ass nobodies. 929 00:50:08,152 --> 00:50:11,321 What the hell I was thinking that I could have this? 930 00:50:11,405 --> 00:50:13,407 Or any of it? 931 00:50:14,616 --> 00:50:17,035 Hey, for real, just... cut this off, all right? 932 00:50:17,119 --> 00:50:18,746 Just cut it off. 933 00:50:20,456 --> 00:50:23,167 You want to get rid of the royal princely braid? 934 00:50:24,418 --> 00:50:26,879 Well, this is fair. 935 00:50:26,962 --> 00:50:30,382 To be honest, it wasn't a great look on you. 936 00:50:31,717 --> 00:50:34,803 Just one of the many backward Zamundan traditions. 937 00:50:36,305 --> 00:50:38,098 Hell yeah. 938 00:50:38,182 --> 00:50:40,726 How long have you felt that way? You know how itchy this is? 939 00:50:40,809 --> 00:50:42,770 -It's a rat tail. - 940 00:50:42,853 --> 00:50:45,314 And what's up with y'all and lion whiskers? 941 00:50:45,397 --> 00:50:47,149 Like, be for real-- what's up with that? 942 00:50:48,942 --> 00:50:51,695 Hey, yo, I-I can't do this right now, man. 943 00:50:54,490 --> 00:50:56,492 Yo, look where I'm at. 944 00:50:58,202 --> 00:51:00,245 I'm not supposed to be here. 945 00:51:01,288 --> 00:51:03,123 You know, my whole life, I had dreams 946 00:51:03,207 --> 00:51:05,042 that my pops would show up and take 947 00:51:05,125 --> 00:51:07,252 me and my mom away to a whole new life. 948 00:51:07,336 --> 00:51:09,254 And come to find out, he's a king. 949 00:51:09,338 --> 00:51:11,048 To a whole damn country. 950 00:51:11,131 --> 00:51:13,175 And the only way to meet his expectations 951 00:51:13,258 --> 00:51:16,887 is to walk with a stick up my ass or get myself killed. 952 00:51:19,014 --> 00:51:20,974 This-this ain't my way, Mirembe. 953 00:51:21,058 --> 00:51:24,645 And I-I-I can't... I can't be what he wants me to be. 954 00:51:26,355 --> 00:51:30,108 Then perhaps be not as King Akeem 955 00:51:30,192 --> 00:51:32,444 but as Prince Akeem. 956 00:51:34,112 --> 00:51:35,948 Ain't that the same brother? 957 00:51:37,115 --> 00:51:38,867 You haven't heard the story. 958 00:51:38,951 --> 00:51:41,411 Everyone in Zamunda knows 959 00:51:41,495 --> 00:51:45,249 the legend of Prince Akeem 960 00:51:45,332 --> 00:51:48,836 -in the land of Queens. - 961 00:51:48,919 --> 00:51:51,463 Prince Akeem was a dutiful prince 962 00:51:51,547 --> 00:51:53,173 and loyal son of Zamunda. 963 00:51:53,257 --> 00:51:54,299 AKEEM: Hello, Babar. 964 00:51:54,383 --> 00:51:55,884 MIREMBE: But he believed that a man 965 00:51:55,968 --> 00:51:57,928 must walk his own path and follow his heart. 966 00:51:58,011 --> 00:51:59,763 I intend to find my bride. 967 00:51:59,847 --> 00:52:01,598 What is wrong with the one you have now? 968 00:52:01,682 --> 00:52:03,517 -Bark like a dog. - 969 00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:05,185 AKEEM: I want a woman that's going to 970 00:52:05,269 --> 00:52:07,062 arouse my intellect as well as my loins. 971 00:52:07,145 --> 00:52:09,106 MIREMBE: He flew across the sea 972 00:52:09,189 --> 00:52:10,607 to find his true love. 973 00:52:10,691 --> 00:52:11,859 Now there, 974 00:52:11,942 --> 00:52:14,945 in the barbaric land of Queens 975 00:52:15,028 --> 00:52:18,365 did Prince Akeem battle bug-eyed burglars, 976 00:52:18,448 --> 00:52:20,242 foul-mouthed barbers 977 00:52:20,325 --> 00:52:23,120 and sexist men of the cloth 978 00:52:23,203 --> 00:52:25,497 to win the heart of his true love, 979 00:52:25,581 --> 00:52:28,292 Lisa McDowell of Queens. 980 00:52:36,550 --> 00:52:38,635 MIREMBE: The wedding was grand 981 00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:42,598 and beautiful and magical. 982 00:52:42,681 --> 00:52:45,475 A new dawn had arised in Zamunda, 983 00:52:45,559 --> 00:52:46,894 a new sense of hope 984 00:52:46,977 --> 00:52:48,604 and change. 985 00:52:48,687 --> 00:52:51,440 King Akeem... 986 00:52:51,523 --> 00:52:54,151 may have forgotten his story, 987 00:52:54,234 --> 00:52:56,987 but the people of Zamunda have not. 988 00:53:05,954 --> 00:53:07,998 Walk your own path. 989 00:53:08,081 --> 00:53:11,209 Be not the prince of Zamunda. 990 00:53:11,293 --> 00:53:13,754 Be the prince from Queens. 991 00:53:24,723 --> 00:53:27,851 Lavelle Junson of Queens. 992 00:53:27,935 --> 00:53:29,728 - 993 00:53:29,811 --> 00:53:32,147 breakers gonna break 994 00:53:32,230 --> 00:53:34,107 make mistakes 995 00:53:34,191 --> 00:53:37,527 I'm-a say it again 996 00:53:37,611 --> 00:53:40,364 give me a group, not one man 997 00:53:40,447 --> 00:53:42,783 - 998 00:53:42,866 --> 00:53:45,577 LAVELLE: If it pleases Your Majesty, 999 00:53:45,661 --> 00:53:48,664 I present to you Kareem Junson, 1000 00:53:48,747 --> 00:53:52,334 aka Uncle Reem, 1001 00:53:52,417 --> 00:53:54,378 my royal consigliere. 1002 00:53:54,461 --> 00:53:56,546 That's Italian for "mack daddy mentor." 1003 00:53:56,630 --> 00:53:59,800 You need no other teacher than your king and your father. 1004 00:53:59,883 --> 00:54:02,219 No, no, no, no. See, you watch your bottom lip, money grip, 1005 00:54:02,302 --> 00:54:03,845 'cause you understand, while y'all was out here 1006 00:54:03,929 --> 00:54:05,639 riding elephants and chasing Tarzan, 1007 00:54:05,722 --> 00:54:08,934 I was schooling this boy on the streets of Queens. 1008 00:54:09,017 --> 00:54:10,894 -All right, well, that's... -No, 'cause he don't know me. 1009 00:54:10,978 --> 00:54:13,271 -You do not know me. -No, you don't know me. 1010 00:54:13,355 --> 00:54:14,398 You do not know me. 1011 00:54:14,481 --> 00:54:15,774 -You don't know me. -I will cut you. 1012 00:54:15,857 --> 00:54:17,025 Enough of this. 1013 00:54:19,194 --> 00:54:23,490 Uncle Reem of Queens... you're welcome in my kingdom. 1014 00:54:23,573 --> 00:54:24,825 LAVELLE: Come on. 1015 00:54:24,908 --> 00:54:26,952 REEM: Benson, y'all got some crab cakes, man? 1016 00:54:27,035 --> 00:54:28,078 I need some protein. 1017 00:54:28,161 --> 00:54:30,372 -Who is Benson? -Benson is you. 1018 00:54:30,455 --> 00:54:32,249 LAVELLE: Hold up. Hold up. 1019 00:54:32,332 --> 00:54:34,710 Let me get my Spotify on deck real quick. 1020 00:54:36,503 --> 00:54:37,796 Let's rock. 1021 00:54:37,879 --> 00:54:39,756 You ain't said nothing but a thing. 1022 00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:40,841 See his feet? 1023 00:54:40,924 --> 00:54:42,134 -Yes. -See where his hand at? 1024 00:54:42,217 --> 00:54:43,885 -Mm-hmm. -See how he moving? 1025 00:54:43,969 --> 00:54:46,638 Yes. There's a fluidity to it. 1026 00:54:46,722 --> 00:54:49,641 Yeah, it's like Bruce Lee said, "Be like water." 1027 00:54:49,725 --> 00:54:51,351 LAVELLE: That's Hebbe Joffer. 1028 00:54:51,435 --> 00:54:52,936 Legend has it he could speak to animals, 1029 00:54:53,020 --> 00:54:54,229 and people thought he was crazy 1030 00:54:54,312 --> 00:54:56,023 until he made a giraffe do the Electric Slide. 1031 00:54:57,274 --> 00:54:59,234 TOTATSI It appears a royal wedding 1032 00:54:59,317 --> 00:55:00,986 may soon be upon us. 1033 00:55:01,069 --> 00:55:02,863 For more on this, we are joined by Semmi. 1034 00:55:02,946 --> 00:55:04,281 Good to see you, Totatsi. 1035 00:55:04,364 --> 00:55:07,784 According to our ZNN source inside the palace, 1036 00:55:07,868 --> 00:55:09,786 we are hearing-- and I quote-- 1037 00:55:09,870 --> 00:55:13,790 "The boy been balling on this princely-ass test 1038 00:55:13,874 --> 00:55:18,628 ever since his handsome and mad smart uncle showed up." 1039 00:55:18,712 --> 00:55:21,173 That is absurd, Totatsi. Who is your source? 1040 00:55:21,256 --> 00:55:23,133 What the deal? What the deal? 1041 00:55:23,216 --> 00:55:25,260 Palace life for me. 1042 00:55:25,343 --> 00:55:26,970 SEMMI: Who do you think you are, Reem, 1043 00:55:27,054 --> 00:55:28,513 going behind the king's back? 1044 00:55:28,597 --> 00:55:30,223 -You keep talking slick... -G-Gentlemen. 1045 00:55:30,307 --> 00:55:32,059 ...and when my man is running this place, 1046 00:55:32,142 --> 00:55:33,894 you gonna go from royal ass kisser 1047 00:55:33,977 --> 00:55:35,729 -to royal ass wiper. -No, no. 1048 00:55:35,812 --> 00:55:37,522 -I will do no such thing. -Please, g-gent... 1049 00:55:37,606 --> 00:55:39,524 REEM: Yeah, well, I eat a lot of fried food, 1050 00:55:39,608 --> 00:55:40,901 so don't come at me with 1051 00:55:40,984 --> 00:55:42,736 -anything less than two-ply. -Oh! 1052 00:55:42,819 --> 00:55:45,530 I'm a queen, I'm a queen 1053 00:55:45,614 --> 00:55:47,365 if they ain't got me 1054 00:55:47,449 --> 00:55:49,659 I'm a queen... 1055 00:55:52,662 --> 00:55:54,372 Okay. 1056 00:55:54,456 --> 00:55:56,833 kingdom, run it smarter... 1057 00:55:56,917 --> 00:55:58,877 Oh, that's right. Ooh! 1058 00:55:58,960 --> 00:56:00,879 -I believe I have it now. -Don't hurt nobody. 1059 00:56:00,962 --> 00:56:02,297 LAVELLE: Yeah, you got something. 1060 00:56:02,380 --> 00:56:04,007 -Now let me hear you say, "Hey, ho." -I don't know... 1061 00:56:04,091 --> 00:56:05,550 -Hey, ho. -Oh. -MARY: That's right. 1062 00:56:05,634 --> 00:56:07,552 That's how we do it in Queens, though. 1063 00:56:07,636 --> 00:56:09,679 -Hey, ho. -LAVELLE: Oh, no, no, no, no. 1064 00:56:09,763 --> 00:56:11,056 No, don't do that. That's his mother. 1065 00:56:11,139 --> 00:56:12,641 -Oh, don't say it to... -No, not to his mother. 1066 00:56:12,724 --> 00:56:14,267 -You obese American, you. -No. 1067 00:56:14,351 --> 00:56:15,727 Yeah, for 25 cents a day, 1068 00:56:15,811 --> 00:56:18,438 I could sponsor-feed your scrawny ass. 1069 00:56:18,522 --> 00:56:20,357 Go to hell, you Western weasel! 1070 00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:22,234 -Yo, well, why don't you go? -Make me. 1071 00:56:22,317 --> 00:56:23,985 You know something? Then I will. 1072 00:56:24,069 --> 00:56:25,612 You cholesterol dumpster fire, you. 1073 00:56:25,695 --> 00:56:27,531 -I-- o-okay, okay. 1074 00:56:27,614 --> 00:56:28,949 -Totatsi! Call the guards! - 1075 00:56:29,032 --> 00:56:30,242 Let us, let us go for a short break. 1076 00:56:30,325 --> 00:56:31,701 LAVELLE: Hmm. 1077 00:56:31,785 --> 00:56:32,953 That's Forest Whitaker. 1078 00:56:33,036 --> 00:56:34,412 I'm joking. That's not... 1079 00:56:34,496 --> 00:56:36,581 That one is Tunde Joffer. 1080 00:56:36,665 --> 00:56:38,250 Uh, he's the reason why the Zamundans migrated 1081 00:56:38,333 --> 00:56:39,459 from the north to the east. 1082 00:56:39,543 --> 00:56:41,044 TINASHE: He's doing pretty good. 1083 00:56:43,713 --> 00:56:45,715 I'm a queen, I'm a queen 1084 00:56:45,799 --> 00:56:48,343 if they ain't got me, ay 1085 00:56:48,426 --> 00:56:50,637 I'm a queen. 1086 00:56:50,720 --> 00:56:52,681 AKEEM: There is but one test that remains: 1087 00:56:52,764 --> 00:56:54,516 retrieving the whiskers from a lion. 1088 00:56:56,393 --> 00:56:59,938 My one question is: How will you conquer your fear? 1089 00:57:00,021 --> 00:57:01,648 I'm not. 1090 00:57:01,731 --> 00:57:03,275 It's a damn lion. 1091 00:57:03,358 --> 00:57:05,277 Well, I found it is helpful to think of them 1092 00:57:05,360 --> 00:57:07,028 as just being big house cats. 1093 00:57:07,112 --> 00:57:08,613 -Oh? - 1094 00:57:08,697 --> 00:57:10,073 Just big house cats? 1095 00:57:10,157 --> 00:57:12,325 Really? When'd you figure that out? 1096 00:57:12,409 --> 00:57:14,744 Was that on your tenth or 11th try? 1097 00:57:14,828 --> 00:57:16,454 I know not what you speak of. 1098 00:57:16,538 --> 00:57:18,165 I was successful my first time, 1099 00:57:18,248 --> 00:57:20,500 -just like my father. -Jaffe Joffer. 1100 00:57:20,584 --> 00:57:23,003 -And his father before him. -Jappa Joffer. 1101 00:57:24,045 --> 00:57:26,089 -Very good. Very good! - 1102 00:57:27,465 --> 00:57:29,509 -AKEEM: Oh, watch. 1103 00:57:29,593 --> 00:57:31,052 -Oh, shit! -Oh, do not be alarmed. 1104 00:57:31,136 --> 00:57:32,846 This Babar, he is my friend. 1105 00:57:32,929 --> 00:57:34,848 I have known him since he was a small elephant. 1106 00:57:34,931 --> 00:57:35,974 Let him pass. Move. 1107 00:57:36,057 --> 00:57:37,267 -Let him pass. -All right. 1108 00:57:37,350 --> 00:57:39,102 Come through, Babar, my friend. 1109 00:57:39,186 --> 00:57:41,479 Babar, the magnificent one. 1110 00:57:41,563 --> 00:57:44,024 I have known him since he was a little elephant, 1111 00:57:44,107 --> 00:57:45,901 and now he is a father, as well. 1112 00:57:45,984 --> 00:57:47,527 -Wow. -The great one! 1113 00:57:52,240 --> 00:57:54,868 I must admit, your manner and your style 1114 00:57:54,951 --> 00:57:57,787 is foreign to my kingdom, but it is impressive. 1115 00:57:57,871 --> 00:58:01,499 Yeah? Damn, I'm just trying to be like you. 1116 00:58:01,583 --> 00:58:03,501 You know what I mean? 1117 00:58:03,585 --> 00:58:06,421 You know, Mirembe, my royal barber, 1118 00:58:06,504 --> 00:58:08,798 told me the story that your pops 1119 00:58:08,882 --> 00:58:11,009 wanted you to marry a Nexdorian girl, 1120 00:58:11,092 --> 00:58:14,221 so you bounced to Queens to find a wife on your own terms. 1121 00:58:16,389 --> 00:58:18,642 I wanted to find more than a wife. 1122 00:58:18,725 --> 00:58:22,270 To find someone that I connected with on every level. 1123 00:58:22,354 --> 00:58:24,189 Someone who knew where I was coming from 1124 00:58:24,272 --> 00:58:27,400 even though we came from entirely two different places. 1125 00:58:31,988 --> 00:58:34,741 And one might say I was looking for myself, as well. 1126 00:58:37,827 --> 00:58:40,914 Get some rest, my son. 1127 00:58:42,832 --> 00:58:44,417 Thanks, Pops. 1128 00:59:06,398 --> 00:59:08,316 He looks hungry. 1129 00:59:08,400 --> 00:59:10,902 You can see it in how he walks low to the ground. 1130 00:59:10,986 --> 00:59:13,280 Look, man, you haven't liked me since I got here, 1131 00:59:13,363 --> 00:59:15,240 and I get that, but ain't my fault 1132 00:59:15,323 --> 00:59:18,034 your dad knocked up my mom and dragged my ass back to Africa. 1133 00:59:18,118 --> 00:59:20,578 Well, no one is asking you to stay. 1134 00:59:20,662 --> 00:59:22,497 It's all good, little sis. All good. 1135 00:59:22,580 --> 00:59:24,374 I'll be gone in a minute, 'cause I'm about to be 1136 00:59:24,457 --> 00:59:25,750 -eaten by a lion! -I hope so! 1137 00:59:25,834 --> 00:59:26,918 -Fine! Fine! -Fine! 1138 00:59:34,092 --> 00:59:36,636 You really think I'm gonna fail, don't you? 1139 00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:45,895 I have never said that... 1140 00:59:45,979 --> 00:59:47,897 out loud. 1141 00:59:47,981 --> 00:59:49,858 You ain't got to. 1142 00:59:49,941 --> 00:59:51,276 It's that look. 1143 00:59:55,488 --> 00:59:58,033 Been getting that look my entire life. 1144 00:59:58,116 --> 01:00:01,286 People writing me off 'cause of the way I talk 1145 01:00:01,369 --> 01:00:03,747 or where I'm from. 1146 01:00:03,830 --> 01:00:05,832 But you got no idea what I'm talking about. 1147 01:00:05,915 --> 01:00:08,126 'Cause you a princess. 1148 01:00:08,209 --> 01:00:11,880 Princesses can be written off just as much as anyone. 1149 01:00:11,963 --> 01:00:15,091 I have been preparing my whole life 1150 01:00:15,175 --> 01:00:17,886 to be standing where you are in this moment. 1151 01:00:19,471 --> 01:00:21,014 But you are right. 1152 01:00:21,097 --> 01:00:22,932 It is not fair for me to blame you 1153 01:00:23,016 --> 01:00:25,310 for my father's mistake. 1154 01:00:25,393 --> 01:00:27,854 Not that you are a mistake. 1155 01:00:27,937 --> 01:00:29,856 -Well, you kind of are a mistake. -Okay. 1156 01:00:29,939 --> 01:00:31,900 I get it, I get it. A'ight. 1157 01:00:31,983 --> 01:00:33,526 Damn. 1158 01:00:40,241 --> 01:00:43,495 Perhaps the test has nothing to do with bravery. 1159 01:00:45,580 --> 01:00:49,793 The tests are also a challenge of the mind. 1160 01:01:03,181 --> 01:01:05,725 go big, go big 1161 01:01:09,562 --> 01:01:11,356 in the background 1162 01:01:11,439 --> 01:01:13,149 the front row... 1163 01:01:13,233 --> 01:01:16,194 So, in sales, it's called a bait and switch. 1164 01:01:16,277 --> 01:01:18,321 So, the customer thinks that they're buying something 1165 01:01:18,405 --> 01:01:20,198 at half off, so they come flocking, 1166 01:01:20,281 --> 01:01:22,117 waving their wallets, just hungry to buy something, 1167 01:01:22,200 --> 01:01:23,993 but by the time they get there, 1168 01:01:24,077 --> 01:01:26,121 you sell 'em the upgrade at double the price. 1169 01:01:26,204 --> 01:01:28,873 Yes. It is the same as a technique 1170 01:01:28,957 --> 01:01:31,543 we use in battle called the feigned withdrawal. 1171 01:01:31,626 --> 01:01:34,129 An army retreats with the sole intention 1172 01:01:34,212 --> 01:01:36,923 of drawing the enemy out and ambushing him. 1173 01:01:37,006 --> 01:01:39,426 So, what, in this scenario, I'm-I'm the retreating army? 1174 01:01:39,509 --> 01:01:41,594 No, you are the bait to switch. 1175 01:01:43,012 --> 01:01:44,597 - 1176 01:01:44,681 --> 01:01:46,182 - 1177 01:01:46,266 --> 01:01:47,684 - 1178 01:01:47,767 --> 01:01:49,352 - 1179 01:01:49,436 --> 01:01:50,937 - 1180 01:01:52,564 --> 01:01:54,107 - 1181 01:01:54,190 --> 01:01:56,109 - 1182 01:01:57,735 --> 01:02:00,905 go big, go big 1183 01:02:07,620 --> 01:02:09,205 REEM: This ain't right. 1184 01:02:09,289 --> 01:02:11,833 My nephew could be eaten by a man-eating lion! 1185 01:02:11,916 --> 01:02:13,835 Besides, what kind of kingdom is this? 1186 01:02:13,918 --> 01:02:18,006 I don't see no Lunchables or no lunch trays up here, nothing! 1187 01:02:55,627 --> 01:02:58,046 -No. 1188 01:03:01,090 --> 01:03:02,175 Oh! 1189 01:03:05,094 --> 01:03:06,846 Run! Run! 1190 01:03:06,930 --> 01:03:08,890 Trust me, don't look back! 1191 01:03:08,973 --> 01:03:10,475 Just keep running! Keep running! Run! 1192 01:03:10,558 --> 01:03:12,310 Keep running! 1193 01:03:18,149 --> 01:03:20,485 - 1194 01:03:28,243 --> 01:03:29,744 No, no. No! 1195 01:03:31,287 --> 01:03:32,914 - 1196 01:03:32,997 --> 01:03:35,166 He's trapped. I must save him. 1197 01:03:35,250 --> 01:03:36,292 Stupid. 1198 01:03:36,376 --> 01:03:37,377 Wait, Father. 1199 01:03:40,380 --> 01:03:42,257 Look. 1200 01:03:49,180 --> 01:03:51,391 What is this? 1201 01:03:52,892 --> 01:03:55,144 What is this? 1202 01:03:55,228 --> 01:03:57,939 What every dangerous house cat likes. 1203 01:04:00,233 --> 01:04:01,442 Cat food. 1204 01:04:37,228 --> 01:04:39,522 -I got 'em. Mm-hmm. - 1205 01:04:44,110 --> 01:04:46,154 He is almost ready to become a prince. 1206 01:04:46,237 --> 01:04:47,614 Wait, almost? 1207 01:04:49,324 --> 01:04:53,161 It is time for umbajuntoo. 1208 01:04:53,244 --> 01:04:55,913 -Umbajuntoo! -CROWD: Umbajuntoo! 1209 01:05:06,716 --> 01:05:09,427 Uh, what's-what's, uh... umbajuntoo? 1210 01:05:09,510 --> 01:05:11,971 Ceremonial circumcision. 1211 01:05:12,055 --> 01:05:14,265 -Ceremonial... - 1212 01:05:14,349 --> 01:05:15,850 That mean they're gonna sharpen your tool, nephew. 1213 01:05:15,933 --> 01:05:18,603 -Hold him. -Hey, yo, ain't got to restrain me. Yo... 1214 01:05:18,686 --> 01:05:20,521 -Hey, Ma, tell 'em we already did this! -That's okay, baby. 1215 01:05:20,605 --> 01:05:22,190 We love it here, right? 1216 01:05:22,273 --> 01:05:24,150 Let them take a little bit off the top. 1217 01:05:24,233 --> 01:05:28,905 These are the foreskins of your forefathers. 1218 01:05:28,988 --> 01:05:31,240 -Ew. -Joffer Joffer. 1219 01:05:31,324 --> 01:05:33,159 Great-great-great-grandfather. 1220 01:05:33,242 --> 01:05:35,203 Jappa Joffer. 1221 01:05:35,286 --> 01:05:36,704 AKEEM: Your great-grandfather. 1222 01:05:36,788 --> 01:05:38,706 Jaffe Joffer. 1223 01:05:38,790 --> 01:05:39,791 Your grandfather. 1224 01:05:39,874 --> 01:05:43,378 And King Akeem. 1225 01:05:48,966 --> 01:05:50,802 Okay. 1226 01:05:50,885 --> 01:05:52,887 - 1227 01:06:09,529 --> 01:06:12,615 What are you... Oh, what is wrong with you? 1228 01:06:12,699 --> 01:06:14,534 - 1229 01:06:14,617 --> 01:06:16,119 See, a potato. 1230 01:06:23,000 --> 01:06:26,254 They got you, baby! They got you! 1231 01:06:27,630 --> 01:06:30,633 You just completed the final princely test, 1232 01:06:30,717 --> 01:06:33,261 -the test of courage. -Courage? 1233 01:06:33,344 --> 01:06:35,513 Need I remind you I was face-to-face 1234 01:06:35,596 --> 01:06:36,848 with a man-eating lion? 1235 01:06:36,931 --> 01:06:39,183 For one to put his member in danger 1236 01:06:39,267 --> 01:06:41,936 is also a test of courage, yes? 1237 01:06:42,019 --> 01:06:45,106 You are willing to sacrifice what is most sacred. 1238 01:06:45,189 --> 01:06:46,774 My penis? 1239 01:06:46,858 --> 01:06:48,735 Your pride. 1240 01:06:50,027 --> 01:06:52,238 Lavelle Junson of Queens, 1241 01:06:52,321 --> 01:06:55,700 I hereby crown you 1242 01:06:55,783 --> 01:06:58,244 the prince of Zamunda. 1243 01:07:03,291 --> 01:07:05,835 Okay, so you thought the best response was 1244 01:07:05,918 --> 01:07:07,628 to let them cut it off? 1245 01:07:07,712 --> 01:07:09,630 I was doing whatever it took. 1246 01:07:09,714 --> 01:07:11,466 Like what, exactly? 1247 01:07:11,549 --> 01:07:13,968 Well, to prove myself. 1248 01:07:14,051 --> 01:07:15,970 You know, like, I-I never really got 1249 01:07:16,053 --> 01:07:17,597 the chance to do that back home. 1250 01:07:23,269 --> 01:07:25,354 As you were. 1251 01:07:27,231 --> 01:07:30,318 I take it you are growing accustomed to a palace life. 1252 01:07:30,401 --> 01:07:32,153 I mean... 1253 01:07:32,236 --> 01:07:35,823 aside from some insane rituals y'all have here, 1254 01:07:35,907 --> 01:07:38,910 I suppose life here ain't too bad. 1255 01:07:43,581 --> 01:07:45,833 -MIREMBE: Well, there are certain disadvantages. -Uh-huh. 1256 01:07:45,917 --> 01:07:47,752 -I mean, have you seen a Zamundan movie? -Mm-mm. 1257 01:07:47,835 --> 01:07:49,670 -Total baboon dung. - 1258 01:07:49,754 --> 01:07:52,799 So, what, like, nothing over a 30% on Rotten Papayas? 1259 01:07:52,882 --> 01:07:54,300 -Ah. - 1260 01:07:54,383 --> 01:07:56,511 American cinema is the best. 1261 01:07:56,594 --> 01:07:58,513 The best? That is, like, 1262 01:07:58,596 --> 01:08:00,890 the most blasphemous thing I've ever heard. 1263 01:08:00,973 --> 01:08:03,100 What do we have besides superhero shit, 1264 01:08:03,184 --> 01:08:07,355 uh, remakes and-and sequels to old movies nobody asked for? 1265 01:08:07,438 --> 01:08:09,232 This is true about sequels. 1266 01:08:09,315 --> 01:08:10,733 If something is good... 1267 01:08:10,817 --> 01:08:12,151 BOTH: ...why ruin it? 1268 01:08:12,235 --> 01:08:13,486 LAVELLE: Mm. 1269 01:08:13,569 --> 01:08:15,905 -Although there are exceptions. -Like what? 1270 01:08:15,988 --> 01:08:17,949 Are you familiar with the Barbershop series? 1271 01:08:18,032 --> 01:08:19,826 Am I familiar with... Look at me. 1272 01:08:19,909 --> 01:08:22,286 Of course I'm familiar with the Barbershop series. 1273 01:08:22,370 --> 01:08:26,332 My favorite spin-off is the one with Queen Latifah. 1274 01:08:26,415 --> 01:08:28,876 Yeah, but that's not Barbershop. 1275 01:08:28,960 --> 01:08:31,462 That's Beauty Shop. 1276 01:08:31,546 --> 01:08:34,298 To-mah-to, to-may-to. 1277 01:08:34,382 --> 01:08:36,384 Potato, papaya. 1278 01:08:40,304 --> 01:08:42,473 So, what, American entertainment? 1279 01:08:42,557 --> 01:08:44,559 Is that our biggest difference? 1280 01:08:45,977 --> 01:08:47,770 Well... 1281 01:08:47,854 --> 01:08:51,524 there are certain freedoms that exist outside of Zamunda. 1282 01:08:51,607 --> 01:08:53,276 Okay. 1283 01:08:53,359 --> 01:08:54,986 Like what? 1284 01:08:56,863 --> 01:08:59,448 Okay, this is going to sound stupid, 1285 01:08:59,532 --> 01:09:02,577 but it has always been a dream of mine to... 1286 01:09:02,660 --> 01:09:04,662 to one day have my own barbershop. 1287 01:09:05,705 --> 01:09:06,789 Yo, that's awesome. 1288 01:09:08,124 --> 01:09:09,750 Are you making fun of me? 1289 01:09:09,834 --> 01:09:11,377 No. 1290 01:09:11,460 --> 01:09:13,212 Nah, I'm being dead-ass. 1291 01:09:13,296 --> 01:09:14,797 Do it. 1292 01:09:14,881 --> 01:09:17,008 I-I don't know anybody who can work scissors like you. 1293 01:09:17,091 --> 01:09:19,302 Well, except women are not allowed 1294 01:09:19,385 --> 01:09:21,012 to own businesses in Zamunda. 1295 01:09:21,095 --> 01:09:23,055 You serious? 1296 01:09:23,139 --> 01:09:24,557 Indeed. 1297 01:09:24,640 --> 01:09:26,601 That's not cool. 1298 01:09:28,227 --> 01:09:30,688 Well, I'm prince, right? 1299 01:09:30,771 --> 01:09:32,356 So, you know something? 1300 01:09:32,440 --> 01:09:34,525 As long as I'm prince, 1301 01:09:34,609 --> 01:09:37,320 I can promise you there's gonna be some changes around here. 1302 01:09:37,403 --> 01:09:40,114 Well, that is very idealistic. 1303 01:09:42,992 --> 01:09:45,161 promises to do things differently, 1304 01:09:45,244 --> 01:09:47,747 but eventually, they do things 1305 01:09:47,830 --> 01:09:49,832 the same way they've always been done before. 1306 01:09:51,083 --> 01:09:54,086 Yeah, well, I'm not like every other prince. 1307 01:09:54,170 --> 01:09:56,213 Remember? 1308 01:09:56,297 --> 01:09:58,174 I'm a prince from Queens. 1309 01:09:59,216 --> 01:10:02,053 I wonder who told you that. 1310 01:10:02,136 --> 01:10:04,513 Somebody. 1311 01:10:13,773 --> 01:10:16,359 I should not have done that. 1312 01:10:16,442 --> 01:10:18,569 -I should not have done that. -Wait. Wait, hold on. 1313 01:10:18,653 --> 01:10:20,071 Mirem... 1314 01:10:20,154 --> 01:10:21,781 Um... 1315 01:10:23,282 --> 01:10:26,327 I think it is best you go to bed and get some rest. 1316 01:10:27,411 --> 01:10:29,747 Tomorrow is going to be a very long day. 1317 01:10:29,830 --> 01:10:32,625 You are one step closer to... 1318 01:10:32,708 --> 01:10:34,919 marrying your princess. 1319 01:10:38,714 --> 01:10:40,341 Good night. 1320 01:10:59,276 --> 01:11:02,947 Presenting the crown prince of Zamunda, 1321 01:11:03,030 --> 01:11:04,949 Prince Lavelle! 1322 01:11:28,806 --> 01:11:30,516 -King Akeem. -Yes. 1323 01:11:30,599 --> 01:11:32,184 So wonderful to see you, General. 1324 01:11:35,146 --> 01:11:36,564 IZZI: Ooh. 1325 01:11:38,315 --> 01:11:40,317 -Prince Lavelle. -General Izzi. 1326 01:11:40,401 --> 01:11:43,237 Please, allow me to reintroduce 1327 01:11:43,320 --> 01:11:47,158 my daughter, Bopoto! 1328 01:12:02,506 --> 01:12:06,177 - 1329 01:12:06,260 --> 01:12:08,679 My prince. 1330 01:12:08,763 --> 01:12:12,099 Perhaps you two should get to know each other a little better. 1331 01:12:12,183 --> 01:12:13,225 Yes. 1332 01:12:15,936 --> 01:12:21,650 out there... 1333 01:12:21,734 --> 01:12:23,402 Oh. 1334 01:12:26,906 --> 01:12:29,200 Hey, dig this here. 1335 01:12:29,283 --> 01:12:33,913 Could I get two Crown Royals for me and my royal compadre? 1336 01:12:33,996 --> 01:12:35,414 Compadre? 1337 01:12:35,498 --> 01:12:37,208 It means "friend." 1338 01:12:38,250 --> 01:12:40,377 I am Uncle Reem's friend. 1339 01:12:40,461 --> 01:12:41,670 Yes, you are. 1340 01:12:42,713 --> 01:12:43,923 Cheers. 1341 01:12:44,006 --> 01:12:45,800 How you doing? Hey, ladies. 1342 01:12:45,883 --> 01:12:47,426 How you doing? Mm. 1343 01:12:47,510 --> 01:12:48,844 I know I look good. 1344 01:12:48,928 --> 01:12:50,346 Mm, a makeover. 1345 01:12:50,429 --> 01:12:52,098 My hair is on point. 1346 01:12:52,181 --> 01:12:54,308 New dress. Who this? 1347 01:12:54,391 --> 01:12:56,185 Well, if you're going to wear that dress, 1348 01:12:56,268 --> 01:12:58,020 then you should wear this. 1349 01:13:03,359 --> 01:13:05,361 Oh, my God. 1350 01:13:05,444 --> 01:13:07,029 Are you serious? 1351 01:13:07,113 --> 01:13:08,697 Yes. Turn around. 1352 01:13:08,781 --> 01:13:10,366 Oh, my goodness. 1353 01:13:10,449 --> 01:13:12,159 Oh. 1354 01:13:13,452 --> 01:13:15,579 I can't believe it. This is so beautiful. 1355 01:13:15,663 --> 01:13:17,540 I know you gonna want this back. 1356 01:13:17,623 --> 01:13:18,624 It's a gift. 1357 01:13:18,707 --> 01:13:19,875 You're family now. 1358 01:13:21,627 --> 01:13:23,295 -Let's go get drunk. -What? 1359 01:13:23,379 --> 01:13:26,382 MARY: Yes, girl, me and you 'bout to turn it up. 1360 01:13:26,465 --> 01:13:28,050 Hey, bartender! 1361 01:13:28,134 --> 01:13:30,261 Let me have some of your finest drink. 1362 01:13:30,344 --> 01:13:32,388 Two shots of chilled Cîroc. 1363 01:13:37,893 --> 01:13:41,313 So, uh... marriage. 1364 01:13:41,397 --> 01:13:42,940 It's a big step. 1365 01:13:43,983 --> 01:13:46,569 I will make you a happy prince. 1366 01:13:50,322 --> 01:13:51,866 What about you? 1367 01:13:51,949 --> 01:13:54,577 How can I make you a happy princess? 1368 01:13:54,660 --> 01:13:56,453 What do you like? 1369 01:13:56,537 --> 01:13:59,540 Whatever you like. 1370 01:14:00,583 --> 01:14:02,251 Okay, I'll back up. 1371 01:14:02,334 --> 01:14:06,172 Uh, Bopoto, what's your favorite movie? 1372 01:14:06,255 --> 01:14:09,758 Whatever is your favorite movie. 1373 01:14:09,842 --> 01:14:12,261 Uh... is there a goal you have? 1374 01:14:12,344 --> 01:14:14,722 Is-is there a business that you want to start? 1375 01:14:14,805 --> 01:14:17,725 Whatever business you'd like to start. 1376 01:14:27,109 --> 01:14:31,155 I want to have a connection with the person 1377 01:14:31,238 --> 01:14:34,408 that I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with. 1378 01:14:34,491 --> 01:14:36,994 But I am just a wife. 1379 01:14:43,918 --> 01:14:46,003 -Can you wait right here? -Okay. 1380 01:14:46,086 --> 01:14:48,172 -But what shall I do? -Just wait. 1381 01:14:48,255 --> 01:14:49,965 Right here. 1382 01:14:51,342 --> 01:14:53,093 I shall wait here. 1383 01:14:54,094 --> 01:14:55,804 Okay. 1384 01:14:55,888 --> 01:14:57,681 Stop what you're doing 'cause I'm about to ruin 1385 01:14:57,765 --> 01:14:59,892 that you're used to 1386 01:14:59,975 --> 01:15:02,603 I'm making money, see 1387 01:15:02,686 --> 01:15:04,605 you're ready for me 1388 01:15:07,608 --> 01:15:09,944 to do the Hump 1389 01:15:12,321 --> 01:15:15,157 do the Humpty Hump 1390 01:15:17,326 --> 01:15:18,786 Everything is coming out... 1391 01:15:18,869 --> 01:15:20,829 Hey, um, I don't mean to interrupt, 1392 01:15:20,913 --> 01:15:23,791 but, Mutombo, do you mind if I have a minute with her? 1393 01:15:23,874 --> 01:15:25,167 My bad, man. 1394 01:15:25,251 --> 01:15:27,086 No, no, no. 1395 01:15:27,169 --> 01:15:28,629 It's your party, Prince. 1396 01:15:28,712 --> 01:15:30,631 Come here, you gentle giant. 1397 01:15:30,714 --> 01:15:32,675 Yeah. 1398 01:15:32,758 --> 01:15:34,885 I need to talk to you. 1399 01:15:36,095 --> 01:15:37,972 There's nothing for us to talk about. 1400 01:15:38,055 --> 01:15:39,306 Excuse me. 1401 01:15:39,390 --> 01:15:40,641 Yes, there is. 1402 01:15:40,724 --> 01:15:42,851 I don't want to marry her. 1403 01:15:50,234 --> 01:15:52,486 I want to be with you. 1404 01:15:54,113 --> 01:15:57,324 You and only you are the reason why I'm a prince. 1405 01:15:57,408 --> 01:15:59,535 But, Lavelle... 1406 01:15:59,618 --> 01:16:00,995 Look. 1407 01:16:01,996 --> 01:16:03,872 My father... 1408 01:16:03,956 --> 01:16:05,541 he'll understand. 1409 01:16:07,543 --> 01:16:09,295 I'll be right back. 1410 01:16:13,424 --> 01:16:16,760 I must say, you are more like your father than I thought. 1411 01:16:16,844 --> 01:16:19,054 Oh, really? Why do you say that, General? 1412 01:16:19,138 --> 01:16:21,390 Snatching up this bastard boy from America 1413 01:16:21,473 --> 01:16:24,351 and throwing him into our kingly affairs... 1414 01:16:24,435 --> 01:16:27,062 like a chess pawn? 1415 01:16:29,440 --> 01:16:32,192 Your pawn just took a future queen, 1416 01:16:32,276 --> 01:16:34,737 and now there can be peace. 1417 01:16:34,820 --> 01:16:36,864 And profit. 1418 01:16:38,490 --> 01:16:40,117 Well played, King Akeem. 1419 01:16:40,200 --> 01:16:42,119 Well played. 1420 01:16:49,126 --> 01:16:51,920 I need to find my mom. I need to find my Uncle Reem. 1421 01:16:53,088 --> 01:16:55,299 We got to bust out of this bullshit, man. 1422 01:16:55,382 --> 01:16:57,301 Wh-Why? Where are we going? 1423 01:16:57,384 --> 01:16:58,844 Home. 1424 01:17:00,346 --> 01:17:02,264 A home... 1425 01:17:02,348 --> 01:17:05,726 A home that we can build together. 1426 01:17:24,370 --> 01:17:26,455 Uh, where is Prince Lavelle? 1427 01:17:26,538 --> 01:17:29,625 My prince asked me to stay here about an hour ago. 1428 01:17:33,837 --> 01:17:37,841 Prince Lavelle Junson was seen fleeing with the royal groomer. 1429 01:17:37,925 --> 01:17:39,676 And he took his Uncle Reem 1430 01:17:39,760 --> 01:17:41,303 and that wretched woman with him, as well. 1431 01:17:41,387 --> 01:17:43,055 Show respect. 1432 01:17:43,138 --> 01:17:45,140 She is still the mother of my son. 1433 01:17:45,224 --> 01:17:47,518 She took the royal jet. 1434 01:17:47,601 --> 01:17:49,269 That thieving bitch. 1435 01:17:49,353 --> 01:17:50,854 IZZI: King Akeem. 1436 01:17:51,897 --> 01:17:53,857 Where is your prince? 1437 01:17:53,941 --> 01:17:55,609 Ah, I do believe he has gone 1438 01:17:55,692 --> 01:17:57,820 for one of his, um, evening strolls. 1439 01:17:57,903 --> 01:18:00,072 He does that from time to time to clear his mind. 1440 01:18:00,155 --> 01:18:01,657 Oh. 1441 01:18:01,740 --> 01:18:04,201 I hope he's not getting cold feet. 1442 01:18:04,284 --> 01:18:06,537 -Nonsense. - 1443 01:18:06,620 --> 01:18:08,038 Good. 1444 01:18:08,122 --> 01:18:11,166 Because I will be expecting a wedding tomorrow. 1445 01:18:11,250 --> 01:18:12,709 Of course. 1446 01:18:16,630 --> 01:18:19,842 IZZI: Wedding bells, wedding bells. 1447 01:18:21,802 --> 01:18:23,846 Everything that I have done for him, 1448 01:18:23,929 --> 01:18:25,597 I can't believe he has done this. 1449 01:18:25,681 --> 01:18:28,016 I make him a prince, I give him a chance to finally 1450 01:18:28,100 --> 01:18:30,561 make something of himself, and this is how he repays me! 1451 01:18:30,644 --> 01:18:34,189 I finally made a friend from my own hood, 1452 01:18:34,273 --> 01:18:36,066 and now she's gone. 1453 01:18:36,150 --> 01:18:39,695 Oh, I'm-a miss her crazy ass. 1454 01:18:39,778 --> 01:18:41,572 He could've told me about this groomer. 1455 01:18:41,655 --> 01:18:44,366 But, no, instead he runs off to America without a word to me. 1456 01:18:44,450 --> 01:18:47,703 It is the most selfish act, unworthy of a Joffer! 1457 01:18:47,786 --> 01:18:49,413 It is spineless! 1458 01:18:49,496 --> 01:18:51,790 Like father, like son. 1459 01:18:51,874 --> 01:18:53,417 What did you say? 1460 01:18:53,500 --> 01:18:55,461 -Uppity bitch say what? -What? 1461 01:18:58,714 --> 01:19:01,258 You are intoxicated, my queen. 1462 01:19:01,341 --> 01:19:03,510 All kinds of wiggity-wack stuff happens 1463 01:19:03,594 --> 01:19:06,388 when you are drunk and high, 1464 01:19:06,472 --> 01:19:10,100 including making babies 1465 01:19:10,184 --> 01:19:14,271 that you don't know anything about. 1466 01:19:14,354 --> 01:19:16,690 Right now you are getting very in and out of my pocket. 1467 01:19:16,773 --> 01:19:19,693 Are you trying to say I'm out of pocket? 1468 01:19:19,776 --> 01:19:21,904 What I am saying is, when a person is drunk, they may say 1469 01:19:21,987 --> 01:19:23,447 -something that they regret... -So, whenever a woman 1470 01:19:23,530 --> 01:19:24,948 speaks her mind, including our daughter, then you just... 1471 01:19:25,032 --> 01:19:26,241 ...so I suggest you mind your tongue! 1472 01:19:29,995 --> 01:19:32,039 What happened to you, Akeem? 1473 01:19:32,122 --> 01:19:36,084 You were supposed to change things. 1474 01:19:36,168 --> 01:19:39,546 You were supposed to bring this kingdom to the 21st century, 1475 01:19:39,630 --> 01:19:43,967 but instead, you push our daughter aside, 1476 01:19:44,051 --> 01:19:49,056 someone who has dedicated her life to this country. 1477 01:19:49,139 --> 01:19:51,642 And because she's a woman, 1478 01:19:51,725 --> 01:19:53,936 she can't be your heir? 1479 01:19:54,019 --> 01:19:57,022 I cannot ignore hundreds of years of tradition. 1480 01:19:57,105 --> 01:19:58,690 I am the ruler of this land. 1481 01:19:58,774 --> 01:20:00,442 I must be strong. 1482 01:20:05,364 --> 01:20:06,782 I get it. 1483 01:20:08,283 --> 01:20:10,452 You're the king. 1484 01:20:10,536 --> 01:20:12,663 Well, I'll tell you what. 1485 01:20:12,746 --> 01:20:15,791 There are a lot of other beds in this castle. 1486 01:20:16,792 --> 01:20:20,003 I suggest you find another one. 1487 01:20:20,087 --> 01:20:24,383 Would you dare banish me from my own bedroom? 1488 01:20:24,466 --> 01:20:26,176 Are you a fool? 1489 01:20:26,260 --> 01:20:29,763 Do you see me hopping on one leg and barking like a dog? 1490 01:20:56,081 --> 01:20:57,749 What the hell is going on here? 1491 01:20:57,833 --> 01:20:59,376 He's in the back. 1492 01:20:59,459 --> 01:21:01,670 He's been here for hours. 1493 01:21:07,426 --> 01:21:08,677 Akeem. 1494 01:21:10,846 --> 01:21:12,889 How you doing, son? 1495 01:21:14,141 --> 01:21:16,184 I used to quite enjoy mopping. 1496 01:21:16,268 --> 01:21:18,687 It was simple, and it made sense. 1497 01:21:23,025 --> 01:21:25,944 Every day, I have moved closer to the comfort of life, 1498 01:21:26,028 --> 01:21:28,071 and now my eyes are open, 1499 01:21:28,155 --> 01:21:29,990 and the man that I always wanted to be 1500 01:21:30,073 --> 01:21:31,700 is on the other side of the world. 1501 01:21:31,783 --> 01:21:33,327 Lavelle. 1502 01:21:33,410 --> 01:21:36,913 Yes, he has fleed to America for love just as I did. 1503 01:21:36,997 --> 01:21:38,749 And now, because of my stubbornness, 1504 01:21:38,832 --> 01:21:40,792 I have run off my own son. 1505 01:21:42,085 --> 01:21:43,795 Failed him as a father. 1506 01:21:43,879 --> 01:21:46,423 You're not just a father. 1507 01:21:46,506 --> 01:21:48,133 You're the king. 1508 01:21:48,216 --> 01:21:51,219 And heavy lies the head that wears the crown. 1509 01:21:51,303 --> 01:21:54,014 Yes, I understand that expression more now. 1510 01:21:54,097 --> 01:21:56,558 It's not so much the crown that is so heavy. 1511 01:21:56,642 --> 01:22:00,062 It's everything that comes with it. Hmm? 1512 01:22:00,145 --> 01:22:01,855 You've got your country to run 1513 01:22:01,938 --> 01:22:04,775 and a crazy-ass general breathing down your neck. 1514 01:22:04,858 --> 01:22:06,693 And on top of all that, 1515 01:22:06,777 --> 01:22:09,529 you got to be a husband and a father. 1516 01:22:09,613 --> 01:22:11,740 Yes, you can see that is most troubling. 1517 01:22:11,823 --> 01:22:13,533 -Oh, I get it. -Of course you get it. 1518 01:22:13,617 --> 01:22:15,619 You are the king of your own castle. 1519 01:22:15,702 --> 01:22:18,121 And the troubles never stop, Akeem. 1520 01:22:18,205 --> 01:22:20,248 When I introduced the McFlurby, 1521 01:22:20,332 --> 01:22:22,000 the McDonald's lawyers came after me 1522 01:22:22,084 --> 01:22:24,586 the same way this General Izzi is coming after you. 1523 01:22:24,670 --> 01:22:28,256 Cease-and-desist letters, copyright infringement. 1524 01:22:28,340 --> 01:22:32,469 I mean, the McFlurby is nothing like the McFlurry. 1525 01:22:32,552 --> 01:22:35,347 We put our toppings on the bottom. 1526 01:22:36,807 --> 01:22:38,392 So you have to stay strong. 1527 01:22:38,475 --> 01:22:40,310 And you have to put McDowell's first. 1528 01:22:40,394 --> 01:22:42,938 -I am McDowell's. -And I am Zamunda. 1529 01:22:43,021 --> 01:22:44,314 It's not the Golden Arches. 1530 01:22:44,398 --> 01:22:46,441 BOTH: It's the Golden Arcs. 1531 01:22:46,525 --> 01:22:47,859 And I'm the boss. 1532 01:22:47,943 --> 01:22:50,028 And I am the MF'ing king. 1533 01:22:50,112 --> 01:22:51,363 You damn right you are. 1534 01:22:51,446 --> 01:22:54,282 Cleo, thank you. 1535 01:22:54,366 --> 01:22:57,077 I much needed to hear the wisdom of a father. 1536 01:22:57,160 --> 01:22:58,912 Well, I'm sure your father would understand 1537 01:22:58,995 --> 01:23:01,331 -what you're going through. -Yes. 1538 01:23:04,042 --> 01:23:05,043 Akeem. 1539 01:23:06,628 --> 01:23:09,339 What do you think your mother would say now? 1540 01:23:10,549 --> 01:23:12,426 My mother? 1541 01:23:12,509 --> 01:23:14,386 The queen. 1542 01:23:14,469 --> 01:23:18,640 I always thought that she was the wisest of all the Joffers. 1543 01:23:18,724 --> 01:23:21,143 What do you think she would say to you now, son? 1544 01:23:31,194 --> 01:23:32,696 Zamundans, rise. 1545 01:23:32,779 --> 01:23:34,156 Prepare the royal jet. 1546 01:23:34,239 --> 01:23:35,657 I shall return to America 1547 01:23:35,741 --> 01:23:37,826 and retrieve this errant child of mine. 1548 01:23:37,909 --> 01:23:39,786 General Izzi will return in one day, 1549 01:23:39,870 --> 01:23:43,081 and if there's no wedding, he most certainly will attack. 1550 01:23:43,165 --> 01:23:45,125 You stay here and protect my family. 1551 01:23:45,208 --> 01:23:47,544 I'm no warrior, Your Majesty. 1552 01:23:47,627 --> 01:23:48,962 Remember who you are. 1553 01:23:49,045 --> 01:23:50,505 You are a son of Zamunda. 1554 01:23:50,589 --> 01:23:52,591 Be strong. 1555 01:23:58,513 --> 01:24:00,432 CLARENCE: And I'll tell you something else. 1556 01:24:00,515 --> 01:24:02,100 I only like redbone gals. 1557 01:24:02,184 --> 01:24:04,603 Oh, see, that's where we part. I like my women Black. 1558 01:24:04,686 --> 01:24:05,896 I want a woman so Black, 1559 01:24:05,979 --> 01:24:07,647 when you make love, you need a flashlight. 1560 01:24:07,731 --> 01:24:09,232 I'm looking for the good stuff, man. 1561 01:24:09,316 --> 01:24:10,567 CLARENCE: Hey! Mufasa! 1562 01:24:10,650 --> 01:24:12,986 Hey, I hear you got your boy back. 1563 01:24:13,069 --> 01:24:14,863 My son has returned to Queens. 1564 01:24:14,946 --> 01:24:16,114 It is most urgent that I find him. 1565 01:24:16,198 --> 01:24:17,657 You know, he was here a little while ago 1566 01:24:17,741 --> 01:24:19,493 with a fine little, pretty African thing. Wasn't she fine? 1567 01:24:19,576 --> 01:24:21,912 -Mm-hmm! -Yeah, talking about getting her a job here. 1568 01:24:21,995 --> 01:24:23,705 Then they gonna save up her money. 1569 01:24:23,789 --> 01:24:25,707 -Then she gonna get her own place. -That's right. 1570 01:24:25,791 --> 01:24:27,334 I told her she could start right now, she was so fine. 1571 01:24:27,417 --> 01:24:29,503 -That's right. -But, she-- they had to go off to their nuptials. 1572 01:24:31,254 --> 01:24:32,672 Nuptials? 1573 01:24:32,756 --> 01:24:34,299 -Yeah. -Where? 1574 01:24:34,382 --> 01:24:35,801 Near that Chinese restaurant 1575 01:24:35,884 --> 01:24:37,594 where I caught the runs last Saturday. 1576 01:24:37,677 --> 01:24:39,179 -What? -Oh, King Yum's. 1577 01:24:39,262 --> 01:24:40,347 Gentlemen, I have no time for this. 1578 01:24:40,430 --> 01:24:42,349 That egg foo yong made me have to stop off 1579 01:24:42,432 --> 01:24:45,519 at my sister's last week and make an emergency dump. 1580 01:24:45,602 --> 01:24:47,103 Silence! 1581 01:24:47,187 --> 01:24:48,605 I have no time to listen to your stories 1582 01:24:48,688 --> 01:24:49,815 about your bowel movements. 1583 01:24:49,898 --> 01:24:51,858 Where is the ceremony? 1584 01:24:51,942 --> 01:24:54,444 -Church of Holy Jubilation. -Thank you. 1585 01:24:55,737 --> 01:24:57,864 You're welcome. 1586 01:25:00,158 --> 01:25:02,619 Who the hell he think he talking to? Coming in here... 1587 01:25:02,702 --> 01:25:04,371 Just 'cause he a king. I got a dog named King. 1588 01:25:04,454 --> 01:25:05,622 Yeah, he ain't the king of this shop. 1589 01:25:05,705 --> 01:25:07,415 -I'm the king of this shop. -Exactly. 1590 01:25:07,499 --> 01:25:09,751 He was nicer when he was a prince. 1591 01:25:16,925 --> 01:25:19,052 Is this a pious house of God? 1592 01:25:19,135 --> 01:25:21,596 If "pious" means cheap, well, then you right. 1593 01:25:21,680 --> 01:25:23,640 This the best house of God we could find 1594 01:25:23,723 --> 01:25:25,016 on a Tuesday afternoon. 1595 01:25:25,100 --> 01:25:26,893 So let's get these rings on these fingers 1596 01:25:26,977 --> 01:25:29,020 before the all-day shrimp ends at Sizzler's. 1597 01:25:29,104 --> 01:25:30,814 I don't even know why they call it "all-day." 1598 01:25:30,897 --> 01:25:32,065 It ends at 6:00. 1599 01:25:32,148 --> 01:25:33,650 Look, baby, it's about the love, okay? 1600 01:25:33,733 --> 01:25:35,318 Not the shrimp. 1601 01:25:35,402 --> 01:25:36,987 -What's a Sizzler? -It's nothing. 1602 01:25:48,248 --> 01:25:52,085 I assume the prince has returned from his midnight stroll 1603 01:25:52,168 --> 01:25:55,463 and is prepared to marry my daughter. 1604 01:25:55,547 --> 01:25:58,258 My apologies, General. 1605 01:25:58,341 --> 01:26:01,803 Prince Lavelle is currently indisposed. 1606 01:26:01,887 --> 01:26:03,722 Indisposed? 1607 01:26:03,805 --> 01:26:05,807 Really? 1608 01:26:05,891 --> 01:26:08,560 I will not continue to be jerked around 1609 01:26:08,643 --> 01:26:10,562 like a howler monkey 1610 01:26:10,645 --> 01:26:13,148 grazing in a field of horny goat weeds. 1611 01:26:13,231 --> 01:26:17,027 Now, you tell me, where is King Akeem? 1612 01:26:30,540 --> 01:26:32,167 REVEREND: All right. 1613 01:26:32,250 --> 01:26:34,085 Let's get hitched. 1614 01:26:34,169 --> 01:26:35,795 - 1615 01:26:35,879 --> 01:26:37,380 Let there be light. 1616 01:26:37,464 --> 01:26:38,548 Hey! 1617 01:26:40,008 --> 01:26:43,845 We are gathered here today 1618 01:26:43,929 --> 01:26:48,141 for the meeting of these two beautiful souls, 1619 01:26:48,224 --> 01:26:52,187 pressed together like a pair of sumptuous... 1620 01:26:53,229 --> 01:26:54,648 ...beings. 1621 01:26:54,731 --> 01:26:56,608 Yeah, Lord. 1622 01:26:56,691 --> 01:26:59,319 -Amen! Amen! -Amen! 1623 01:26:59,402 --> 01:27:00,820 -Feel his presence? -Yes, Father. 1624 01:27:00,904 --> 01:27:02,155 I can't wait to go home and... 1625 01:27:02,238 --> 01:27:05,367 Look, um, I just want to apologize. 1626 01:27:05,450 --> 01:27:10,038 I know this isn't exactly the wedding you've always imagined. 1627 01:27:10,121 --> 01:27:12,332 I don't know why you would apologize. 1628 01:27:12,415 --> 01:27:15,752 I'd always imagined there'd be a womanizing, sexist officiant 1629 01:27:15,835 --> 01:27:19,714 leading a very strange ceremony in black socks. 1630 01:27:20,757 --> 01:27:22,842 It couldn't be more perfect. 1631 01:27:22,926 --> 01:27:25,303 -So nice, I want 'em to say it twice. -Go on, preacher! 1632 01:27:25,387 --> 01:27:26,596 Amen! 1633 01:27:26,680 --> 01:27:28,723 -Say it again. -Amen, girl. -Hallelujah! Amen! 1634 01:27:28,807 --> 01:27:30,100 -REVEREND BROWN: Yes! -Go on, girl! 1635 01:27:30,183 --> 01:27:32,227 -MARY: That's right, girl. 1636 01:27:32,310 --> 01:27:33,520 You family now. 1637 01:27:36,106 --> 01:27:37,607 Take her. 1638 01:27:38,608 --> 01:27:39,693 Keep her as a prisoner 1639 01:27:39,776 --> 01:27:43,571 until King Akeem gives me my answer. 1640 01:27:43,655 --> 01:27:45,949 -Zoot! -SOLDIERS: Zoot! 1641 01:27:59,129 --> 01:28:01,506 Teach this girl some respect. 1642 01:28:17,313 --> 01:28:18,857 Halt! 1643 01:28:20,150 --> 01:28:21,860 Take me to the Church of the Holy Jubilation. 1644 01:28:21,943 --> 01:28:24,320 Sorry, pal. You're gonna have to go into the app. 1645 01:28:24,404 --> 01:28:25,947 You can get a Lyft Lux. 1646 01:28:26,031 --> 01:28:27,115 It's rush hour surge pricing. 1647 01:28:27,198 --> 01:28:28,825 You might want to look for a promo code. 1648 01:28:34,998 --> 01:28:38,710 Fighting is not for pretty girls and princesses. 1649 01:28:38,793 --> 01:28:41,713 Your king and father should have taught you 1650 01:28:41,796 --> 01:28:44,758 to be more polite, 1651 01:28:44,841 --> 01:28:46,843 not so nasty. 1652 01:28:49,220 --> 01:28:51,598 -Oh? 1653 01:28:55,518 --> 01:28:59,064 Defend yourself, you sweat from a baboon's balls. 1654 01:29:03,693 --> 01:29:05,153 - 1655 01:29:22,295 --> 01:29:23,296 Meeka! 1656 01:29:38,061 --> 01:29:39,729 Perhaps now you would like 1657 01:29:39,813 --> 01:29:42,607 to solve your problems diplomatically. 1658 01:29:45,360 --> 01:29:47,362 Do I have your attention? 1659 01:29:49,364 --> 01:29:50,490 I'm listening. 1660 01:29:51,783 --> 01:29:54,869 Now it's time for the main event, young folks. 1661 01:29:54,953 --> 01:29:58,164 Lavelle Junson, do you take... 1662 01:29:58,248 --> 01:30:00,375 Stop! 1663 01:30:01,876 --> 01:30:04,754 Did you run here all the way from Africa? 1664 01:30:04,838 --> 01:30:07,173 Lavelle, you cannot do this. 1665 01:30:07,257 --> 01:30:09,551 And you cannot turn your back on your family. 1666 01:30:09,634 --> 01:30:11,678 -Family?! Let me tell you something! -Oh! 1667 01:30:11,761 --> 01:30:12,762 -I raised that boy! -You ain't gonna 1668 01:30:12,846 --> 01:30:14,055 run in here from Zamunda... 1669 01:30:14,139 --> 01:30:16,349 I know what I am to you! 1670 01:30:16,432 --> 01:30:19,310 I heard everything General Izzi said to you. 1671 01:30:19,394 --> 01:30:22,063 Using me as a chess pawn, right? 1672 01:30:22,147 --> 01:30:24,691 -Lavelle, my son... -Don't "son" me! 1673 01:30:24,774 --> 01:30:28,278 I'm gonna live my life with the woman I love. 1674 01:30:28,361 --> 01:30:31,823 Ain't no castle or mountain of gold 1675 01:30:31,906 --> 01:30:33,950 that's gonna stop me from loving her. 1676 01:30:35,201 --> 01:30:37,871 And I'm-a try my hardest to make her happy. 1677 01:30:39,581 --> 01:30:42,333 Now, do you or do you not understand that? 1678 01:31:01,519 --> 01:31:03,479 I do. 1679 01:31:10,028 --> 01:31:12,322 Long ago, I had your spirit. 1680 01:31:14,073 --> 01:31:18,286 I may not have been as brave as you, Lavelle Junson, 1681 01:31:18,369 --> 01:31:21,080 but I know true love. 1682 01:31:21,164 --> 01:31:26,961 When I told my mother that my true love was my Queen Lisa, 1683 01:31:27,045 --> 01:31:29,172 she urged me to go to her, 1684 01:31:29,255 --> 01:31:32,508 just as you have for your bride. 1685 01:31:32,592 --> 01:31:35,261 The burdens of my country are not yours to carry. 1686 01:31:36,596 --> 01:31:38,932 And if you want to stay here in Queens and marry 1687 01:31:39,015 --> 01:31:42,143 this fine Zamundan woman, I shall not stand in your path. 1688 01:31:42,227 --> 01:31:45,480 I've been ruled by fear for far too long. 1689 01:31:45,563 --> 01:31:48,274 It's time for me to start becoming my own king. 1690 01:31:51,611 --> 01:31:53,613 My own man. 1691 01:31:55,573 --> 01:31:57,742 Just as you did, my son. 1692 01:32:03,414 --> 01:32:06,918 So, please excuse my intrusion. Carry on, please. 1693 01:32:07,001 --> 01:32:08,336 Oh, wait, wait, we into overtime now. 1694 01:32:08,419 --> 01:32:09,963 I need 200 more dollars. 1695 01:32:10,046 --> 01:32:12,423 What you need is to start this ceremony before I come up there 1696 01:32:12,507 --> 01:32:15,009 -and beat your... -AKEEM: Mary, Mary, if our son 1697 01:32:15,093 --> 01:32:18,263 wants to be married in this glorious house of... 1698 01:32:18,346 --> 01:32:21,432 in-in this glorious house... 1699 01:32:21,516 --> 01:32:23,393 This is a house of God, isn't it? 1700 01:32:23,476 --> 01:32:25,103 More like a crack house of God. 1701 01:32:25,186 --> 01:32:26,813 AKEEM: Ah. Then it shall be 1702 01:32:26,896 --> 01:32:28,773 as magnificent as a palace ceremony. 1703 01:32:28,856 --> 01:32:29,941 Come. Sit. 1704 01:32:31,359 --> 01:32:33,111 -Yes, continue. 1705 01:32:33,194 --> 01:32:35,029 This doesn't feel right. 1706 01:32:35,113 --> 01:32:37,782 What? You don't want to get married? 1707 01:32:37,865 --> 01:32:41,369 No, I'm not saying I-I don't want to get married. 1708 01:32:41,452 --> 01:32:42,453 Then what? 1709 01:32:42,537 --> 01:32:44,247 Zamunda's my home. 1710 01:32:44,330 --> 01:32:46,916 It is my pride and my joy. 1711 01:32:47,000 --> 01:32:50,253 And what about your sisters? 1712 01:32:50,336 --> 01:32:52,046 You think they don't need you? 1713 01:32:53,256 --> 01:32:54,882 LAVELLE: Well, um... 1714 01:32:56,134 --> 01:32:58,136 ...maybe we should get married at the palace. 1715 01:32:58,219 --> 01:33:00,513 MIREMBE: But what about your people here? 1716 01:33:00,596 --> 01:33:03,182 What about the land of Queens? 1717 01:33:03,266 --> 01:33:04,434 Wait. 1718 01:33:05,435 --> 01:33:07,645 Hear me now. 1719 01:33:07,729 --> 01:33:10,440 I am King Akeem Joffer, 1720 01:33:10,523 --> 01:33:13,151 and I'm bestowed with great power. 1721 01:33:13,234 --> 01:33:17,572 I shall bring Queens to Zamunda! 1722 01:33:17,655 --> 01:33:19,115 -MARY: Yes! - 1723 01:33:19,198 --> 01:33:20,575 That's what I'm talking about. 1724 01:33:20,658 --> 01:33:22,535 REEM: They still wear silk. 1725 01:33:22,618 --> 01:33:24,996 Where the hell is Zamunda? 1726 01:33:33,046 --> 01:33:36,132 WOMAN 1727 01:33:45,308 --> 01:33:48,644 - 1728 01:34:12,877 --> 01:34:14,295 - 1729 01:34:14,379 --> 01:34:16,381 I will always do what is right for Zamunda. 1730 01:34:16,464 --> 01:34:18,424 That is my oath as king. 1731 01:34:19,509 --> 01:34:21,052 And I promise you, 1732 01:34:21,135 --> 01:34:24,555 I shall always do what is right for our family. 1733 01:34:24,639 --> 01:34:27,600 That is my oath to you, 1734 01:34:27,683 --> 01:34:29,685 Lisa, 1735 01:34:29,769 --> 01:34:31,604 my queen. 1736 01:34:53,000 --> 01:34:57,004 Presenting the crown prince of Zamunda, 1737 01:34:57,088 --> 01:34:58,631 Prince Lavelle, 1738 01:34:58,714 --> 01:35:01,759 and his bride, Princess Mirembe. 1739 01:35:07,640 --> 01:35:09,559 start to fail 1740 01:35:16,607 --> 01:35:19,610 dey go far away 1741 01:35:27,535 --> 01:35:30,163 - 1742 01:35:33,708 --> 01:35:36,752 I think my kingdom was safer with me gone and you in charge. 1743 01:35:36,836 --> 01:35:41,549 I simply acted as my father and king has instructed. 1744 01:35:41,632 --> 01:35:44,385 And that is why I've issued a decree to Baba. 1745 01:35:46,179 --> 01:35:48,389 When I am gone, 1746 01:35:48,473 --> 01:35:51,642 Meeka Joffer shall rule as queen. 1747 01:35:51,726 --> 01:35:54,061 -But the laws. -Will change. 1748 01:35:54,145 --> 01:35:57,607 With more changes to come with your guidance. 1749 01:35:57,690 --> 01:35:59,358 And what about Prince Lavelle? 1750 01:35:59,442 --> 01:36:02,862 Prince Lavelle shall serve as an ambassador to America. 1751 01:36:02,945 --> 01:36:04,947 WOMAN: Thank you. 1752 01:36:05,031 --> 01:36:07,033 And as your brother. 1753 01:36:11,746 --> 01:36:13,748 Forgive an old fool. 1754 01:36:15,500 --> 01:36:19,337 Old fool who loves you very much. 1755 01:36:26,302 --> 01:36:28,346 -Hi. How y'all doing? -This is Mary. 1756 01:36:28,429 --> 01:36:29,931 Y'all look good tonight. 1757 01:36:30,014 --> 01:36:31,224 Hey. How you doing? 1758 01:36:31,307 --> 01:36:32,892 Girl, you is making a statement with that. 1759 01:36:32,975 --> 01:36:34,185 -You is making a statement. -Thank you. 1760 01:36:34,268 --> 01:36:36,312 IZZI: King Akeem. 1761 01:36:36,395 --> 01:36:40,816 Love has once again triumphed in Zamunda. 1762 01:36:43,152 --> 01:36:44,695 Oh, children, you can go and play. 1763 01:36:44,779 --> 01:36:46,489 Go dance. Shake your booties off. 1764 01:36:46,572 --> 01:36:50,117 I hear the trade routes have reopened between our nations. 1765 01:36:50,201 --> 01:36:53,329 Yes. It will be a prosperous 1766 01:36:53,412 --> 01:36:57,041 and peaceful time for us old heads. 1767 01:36:58,834 --> 01:37:01,212 I want to thank you for releasing my sister 1768 01:37:01,295 --> 01:37:03,256 from her canine curse. 1769 01:37:03,339 --> 01:37:05,591 - 1770 01:37:05,675 --> 01:37:07,343 - 1771 01:37:12,181 --> 01:37:14,684 - 1772 01:37:17,853 --> 01:37:20,189 Yeah, give it up! Give it up for Davido! 1773 01:37:20,273 --> 01:37:22,400 - My man. 1774 01:37:22,483 --> 01:37:23,943 All right, all right. 1775 01:37:24,026 --> 01:37:25,486 Where are my people from Zamunda at? 1776 01:37:28,781 --> 01:37:32,076 Dig all that. Okay, now, where my people from Queens at? 1777 01:37:32,159 --> 01:37:33,160 -Queens! 1778 01:37:33,244 --> 01:37:34,912 -Yeah! -Hey, right here! 1779 01:37:34,996 --> 01:37:36,163 -We in the house! -In the building! 1780 01:37:36,247 --> 01:37:37,540 -In the building! -We in Zamunda! 1781 01:37:39,584 --> 01:37:41,586 Well, I can dig that, too. 1782 01:37:41,669 --> 01:37:44,672 -We're about to fix it into overdrive, okay? - 1783 01:37:44,755 --> 01:37:48,217 First of all, shout-out to King Akeem and his family 1784 01:37:48,301 --> 01:37:51,137 -for bringing my favorite artist back to Africa... - 1785 01:37:51,220 --> 01:37:52,722 Who is it? Who is it? 1786 01:37:52,805 --> 01:37:54,682 -Wait, Kendrick Lamar? -No. 1787 01:37:54,765 --> 01:37:56,892 All right, we gonna take this old-school now, okay? 1788 01:37:58,477 --> 01:37:59,770 -Mary J. Blige. -No. 1789 01:37:59,854 --> 01:38:01,856 -Diana Ross! - Nope. 1790 01:38:01,939 --> 01:38:04,650 He's my cousin. He's also my inspiration. 1791 01:38:04,734 --> 01:38:07,278 Okay? He's the wind beneath my wings. 1792 01:38:07,361 --> 01:38:08,696 Don't play. 1793 01:38:08,779 --> 01:38:10,239 Who could be better than Diana Ross? Tell me! 1794 01:38:10,323 --> 01:38:11,949 -Oh, you'll see. -REEM: Okay, I want y'all 1795 01:38:12,033 --> 01:38:14,785 to put your hands together for Randy Watson! 1796 01:38:14,869 --> 01:38:16,495 -Randy Watson in here?! 1797 01:38:16,579 --> 01:38:18,956 -And his band... -Oh, Lord. 1798 01:38:19,040 --> 01:38:21,292 ...Sexual Chocolate! 1799 01:38:21,375 --> 01:38:24,503 - 1800 01:38:36,432 --> 01:38:39,685 - 1801 01:38:39,769 --> 01:38:43,397 birds of a feather 1802 01:38:43,481 --> 01:38:47,610 - 1803 01:38:47,693 --> 01:38:51,447 around me, they say 1804 01:38:54,659 --> 01:38:57,662 for the record 1805 01:38:57,745 --> 01:38:58,871 That boy good. 1806 01:38:58,954 --> 01:39:01,082 - 1807 01:39:07,505 --> 01:39:09,590 with me 1808 01:39:09,674 --> 01:39:11,092 Feel me, now. 1809 01:39:11,175 --> 01:39:13,427 I just want to tell you that every Sunday 1810 01:39:13,511 --> 01:39:15,096 I take my mama to get a McFlurby. 1811 01:39:15,179 --> 01:39:16,514 I love you, Cleo. 1812 01:39:18,974 --> 01:39:22,228 And now, ladies and gentlemen, without any further ado, 1813 01:39:22,311 --> 01:39:25,606 I give you Fresh Peaches and Sugar Cube! 1814 01:39:25,690 --> 01:39:27,400 and I'm the best 1815 01:39:27,483 --> 01:39:29,568 to feel my breasts 1816 01:39:31,153 --> 01:39:33,114 still got the sass 1817 01:39:33,197 --> 01:39:35,658 and I still got ass 1818 01:39:35,741 --> 01:39:38,494 - 1819 01:39:42,039 --> 01:39:43,708 Play that saxophone. 1820 01:39:47,795 --> 01:39:50,214 It's a party over here! 1821 01:39:50,297 --> 01:39:51,298 Party over here! 1822 01:39:51,382 --> 01:39:53,634 REVEREND BROWN Amen. 1823 01:39:53,718 --> 01:39:55,845 God woke me up early this morning. 1824 01:39:55,928 --> 01:39:57,638 -He said, if you ain't got 1825 01:39:57,722 --> 01:39:59,348 somebody to love, go out and find somebody to love. 1826 01:39:59,432 --> 01:40:01,434 -'Cause life's about love. 1827 01:40:01,517 --> 01:40:03,269 -And life's about family. 1828 01:40:03,352 --> 01:40:05,438 -Amen. 1829 01:40:05,521 --> 01:40:07,940 -Randy Watson. 1830 01:40:08,023 --> 01:40:09,191 -Take us home. 1831 01:40:10,609 --> 01:40:12,737 If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. 1832 01:40:12,820 --> 01:40:15,531 with me... 1833 01:40:15,614 --> 01:40:17,867 -Hey. -What say you, brother? 1834 01:40:17,950 --> 01:40:21,287 Would you like to leave all this and go back to Queens? 1835 01:40:23,539 --> 01:40:25,458 - 1836 01:40:29,253 --> 01:40:30,921 with me 1837 01:40:32,339 --> 01:40:33,674 BOTH: Nah. 1838 01:40:33,758 --> 01:40:34,759 - 1839 01:40:34,842 --> 01:40:36,051 Go, Uncle Reem! 1840 01:40:44,935 --> 01:40:47,563 with me 1841 01:41:01,285 --> 01:41:04,205 with me 1842 01:41:15,090 --> 01:41:16,509 One time. 1843 01:41:21,305 --> 01:41:23,808 -Two times. - 1844 01:41:26,685 --> 01:41:27,937 Three times. 1845 01:41:34,944 --> 01:41:37,363 - 1846 01:41:47,957 --> 01:41:50,876 the yellow brick road 1847 01:41:50,960 --> 01:41:54,213 and gold in America 1848 01:41:56,674 --> 01:41:59,593 it's the land of the free... 1849 01:41:59,677 --> 01:42:01,846 It seems that the last time I... 1850 01:42:01,929 --> 01:42:04,932 I only recently discov-- 1851 01:42:05,015 --> 01:42:06,016 I can do that better. 1852 01:42:08,269 --> 01:42:09,854 -Let's cut. -MAN: Cutting. 1853 01:42:09,937 --> 01:42:13,148 ...inherited your father's unforgiving memory. 1854 01:42:13,232 --> 01:42:15,109 Who you talking to? 1855 01:42:16,944 --> 01:42:19,029 Get that stupid look off your face. 1856 01:42:21,574 --> 01:42:22,992 I'm trying to rouse the lion. 1857 01:42:25,244 --> 01:42:26,453 Lion! 1858 01:42:28,289 --> 01:42:30,040 Got the whiskers. 1859 01:42:30,124 --> 01:42:31,750 They from a lion. 1860 01:42:31,834 --> 01:42:33,085 Look at that. 1861 01:42:33,168 --> 01:42:35,880 -That's my thing. - 1862 01:42:35,963 --> 01:42:37,298 Acting mine, that's good. 1863 01:42:37,381 --> 01:42:39,675 He has already ordered your exla-- Shit. 1864 01:42:39,758 --> 01:42:41,886 -My ex-lax? -Cut. 1865 01:42:43,178 --> 01:42:45,389 -Line. -MAN: Reset! 1866 01:42:45,472 --> 01:42:46,473 I've been a, uh-- 1867 01:42:46,557 --> 01:42:48,183 Ah, boy. Oh, my bad. 1868 01:42:48,267 --> 01:42:50,561 I would nothing more-- I would-- 1869 01:42:50,644 --> 01:42:53,355 -Let's do it again. - 1870 01:42:53,439 --> 01:42:56,233 with my own entourage 1871 01:42:56,317 --> 01:42:58,444 'cause I'm royal 1872 01:43:00,112 --> 01:43:02,698 - 1873 01:43:02,781 --> 01:43:06,744 no introduction or permission 1874 01:43:06,827 --> 01:43:09,330 - 1875 01:43:09,413 --> 01:43:11,415 - 1876 01:43:13,959 --> 01:43:16,295 Is anybody gonna tell me why these mashed potatoes is black? 1877 01:43:19,173 --> 01:43:20,883 You damn right you are. 1878 01:43:25,137 --> 01:43:27,806 but soon I'll return to you 1879 01:43:27,890 --> 01:43:30,017 Now I'm on my way to America 1880 01:43:35,481 --> 01:43:38,859 Vacations were canceled, holidays ignored. 1881 01:43:38,943 --> 01:43:40,819 -- Wait a minute. 1882 01:43:40,903 --> 01:43:42,446 -What was that line? - 1883 01:43:47,368 --> 01:43:49,453 Master of disaster! 1884 01:43:49,536 --> 01:43:51,789 Punisher of infidel! 1885 01:43:51,872 --> 01:43:53,958 The midnight train to Georgia. 1886 01:43:55,542 --> 01:43:56,919 -Ow! Shit! 1887 01:43:57,002 --> 01:43:59,713 I'm sorry. 1888 01:43:59,797 --> 01:44:01,757 He actually kicked me in the ass. 1889 01:44:01,840 --> 01:44:03,467 I kicked you in the leg. Come on. 1890 01:44:03,550 --> 01:44:05,678 -That wasn't no accident. - 1891 01:44:12,101 --> 01:44:16,730 - 1892 01:44:56,395 --> 01:45:02,985 at your discretion 1893 01:45:27,051 --> 01:45:28,761 Good night, Zamunda! 1894 01:45:46,403 --> 01:45:49,323 - 1895 01:47:38,640 --> 01:47:40,767 SAUL: Way down in the jungle deep, 1896 01:47:40,851 --> 01:47:44,271 the lion stepped on the signified monkey's feet. 1897 01:47:45,689 --> 01:47:49,776 The monkey said, "Hey, you bastard, can't you see? 1898 01:47:49,860 --> 01:47:53,322 You're standing on my goddamn feet!" 1899 01:47:56,116 --> 01:47:59,161 Hey, what is this, velvet?