1 00:00:01,161 --> 00:00:03,578 (film rolls) 2 00:00:09,155 --> 00:00:11,738 (upbeat music) 3 00:00:15,767 --> 00:00:17,473 - [Steve] It's not healthy is all I'm saying, man. 4 00:00:17,473 --> 00:00:18,410 You get backed up like that, 5 00:00:18,410 --> 00:00:19,368 you're bound to explode. 6 00:00:19,368 --> 00:00:20,912 - [John] It's really not a problem. 7 00:00:20,912 --> 00:00:22,292 - [Steve] Not a problem? 8 00:00:22,292 --> 00:00:24,352 John, how many years ago did Nichole leave you, 9 00:00:24,352 --> 00:00:26,649 and you hadn't been with anyone else since? 10 00:00:26,649 --> 00:00:28,466 People are starting to talk, man, 11 00:00:28,466 --> 00:00:31,144 and the Pope called last week to see if you were okay. 12 00:00:31,144 --> 00:00:32,018 - [John] What did you tell him? 13 00:00:32,018 --> 00:00:32,851 - I told me better change 14 00:00:32,851 --> 00:00:34,563 the church's position on masturbation, 15 00:00:34,563 --> 00:00:37,035 otherwise you're liable to lose your immortal soul. 16 00:00:37,035 --> 00:00:39,618 (upbeat music) 17 00:00:48,831 --> 00:00:49,872 ♪ I set out on a journey ♪ 18 00:00:49,872 --> 00:00:51,203 ♪ Without even knowing that ♪ 19 00:00:51,203 --> 00:00:52,857 ♪ Directions to my castle ♪ 20 00:00:52,857 --> 00:00:54,401 ♪ I don't know where I should be going ♪ 21 00:00:54,401 --> 00:00:55,234 ♪ I gotta a feeling ♪ 22 00:00:55,234 --> 00:00:56,628 ♪ So I head out on my way ♪ 23 00:00:56,628 --> 00:00:57,878 ♪ 'cause There's a princess in distress ♪ 24 00:00:57,878 --> 00:01:00,014 ♪ You know I gotta save the day ♪ 25 00:01:00,014 --> 00:01:02,848 ♪ I grab my shield and I grab my sword ♪ 26 00:01:02,848 --> 00:01:05,430 ♪ A couple scrolls in case I might get bored ♪ 27 00:01:05,430 --> 00:01:06,519 ♪ It's gonna be a journey ♪ 28 00:01:06,519 --> 00:01:07,914 ♪ Gonna have a lot of battles ♪ 29 00:01:07,914 --> 00:01:09,390 ♪ But you know I won't show no mercy ♪ 30 00:01:09,390 --> 00:01:12,287 ♪ When I show up to that castle ♪ 31 00:01:12,287 --> 00:01:14,457 (upbeat music) 32 00:01:14,457 --> 00:01:17,019 ♪ Heads up, I don't know what is brewing ♪ 33 00:01:17,019 --> 00:01:19,891 ♪ Look out, you gonna have to get out my way ♪ 34 00:01:19,891 --> 00:01:22,446 ♪ I won't stop doing what I'm doing ♪ 35 00:01:22,446 --> 00:01:23,525 ♪ Time is running out ♪ 36 00:01:23,525 --> 00:01:25,576 ♪ And you know I gotta go save the day♪ 37 00:01:25,576 --> 00:01:28,371 ♪ Heads up, I don't know what is brewing ♪ 38 00:01:28,371 --> 00:01:31,208 ♪ Look out, you gonna have to get out my way ♪ 39 00:01:31,208 --> 00:01:33,626 ♪ I won't stop doing what I'm doing ♪ 40 00:01:33,626 --> 00:01:34,725 ♪ I'm trying to be a hero ♪ 41 00:01:34,725 --> 00:01:36,878 ♪ And time for me to go save the day ♪ 42 00:01:36,878 --> 00:01:39,461 (upbeat music) 43 00:01:43,216 --> 00:01:46,722 - What exactly is the church's stance on masturbation? 44 00:01:46,722 --> 00:01:48,594 - Sitting I think. 45 00:01:48,594 --> 00:01:50,093 (John laughs) 46 00:01:50,093 --> 00:01:53,556 I mean, seriously, man, what's the problem? 47 00:01:53,556 --> 00:01:54,512 - I don't know, man. 48 00:01:54,512 --> 00:01:56,559 It's hard meeting people. 49 00:01:56,559 --> 00:01:58,727 I'm out of practice. 50 00:01:58,727 --> 00:01:59,983 - What practice? 51 00:01:59,983 --> 00:02:02,584 All you gonna do is meet 'em, smile, 52 00:02:02,584 --> 00:02:04,457 get in there and jam. 53 00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:06,442 - All right, you're right, 54 00:02:06,442 --> 00:02:07,861 but I don't know, man, fuck, 55 00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:10,748 I just wish I hadn't fallen in love with her, you know. 56 00:02:10,748 --> 00:02:12,622 - No, that word. 57 00:02:12,622 --> 00:02:14,131 - What word? 58 00:02:14,131 --> 00:02:16,858 - That is the word the Knights of Ni cannot hear, John. 59 00:02:16,858 --> 00:02:18,108 - Oh, fuck off. 60 00:02:19,417 --> 00:02:22,263 (phone rings) 61 00:02:22,263 --> 00:02:24,361 - Oh, I think my ride's here. 62 00:02:24,361 --> 00:02:26,546 - (laughs) What did she finally get her learners permit? 63 00:02:26,546 --> 00:02:27,913 - No, (blows raspberries). 64 00:02:27,913 --> 00:02:28,746 - Okay, okay. 65 00:02:28,746 --> 00:02:29,579 (rock music) 66 00:02:29,579 --> 00:02:31,412 Whatever, more for me. 67 00:02:32,544 --> 00:02:34,708 Oh Steve, look what you're missing out on. 68 00:02:34,708 --> 00:02:37,708 (upbeat rock music) 69 00:02:44,315 --> 00:02:46,324 ♪ We aint got much but ♪ 70 00:02:46,324 --> 00:02:48,312 ♪ It's seems quite enough ♪ 71 00:02:48,312 --> 00:02:52,342 ♪ When I'm with you doing na, na, na, na, nothing ♪ 72 00:02:52,342 --> 00:02:54,300 ♪ This is my season ♪ 73 00:02:54,300 --> 00:02:56,288 ♪ Making rhyme reason ♪ 74 00:02:56,288 --> 00:02:58,574 ♪ Nothing but singing la, la, la, la ♪ 75 00:02:58,574 --> 00:03:01,491 (video game music) 76 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,241 - Morning boys. 77 00:03:04,241 --> 00:03:05,109 What's the score? 78 00:03:05,109 --> 00:03:05,942 - Oh, hey man. 79 00:03:05,942 --> 00:03:06,775 - What's up, chief? 80 00:03:06,775 --> 00:03:07,608 I'm winning. 81 00:03:07,608 --> 00:03:08,441 - Ah, bullshit! 82 00:03:08,441 --> 00:03:09,329 And easy with that chief crap, 83 00:03:09,329 --> 00:03:10,851 I'm one-16th Native American. 84 00:03:10,851 --> 00:03:12,403 - Fucker! - Oh hey! 85 00:03:12,403 --> 00:03:13,879 - Lighten up, Francis. 86 00:03:13,879 --> 00:03:15,016 - Ah, it's Frank, asshole. 87 00:03:15,016 --> 00:03:15,849 - Psycho! 88 00:03:16,841 --> 00:03:19,229 - Fucking white people. - I know, right? 89 00:03:19,229 --> 00:03:20,062 (Steve knocks) 90 00:03:20,062 --> 00:03:21,312 - John, get up. 91 00:03:26,356 --> 00:03:28,030 Am I interrupting something? 92 00:03:28,030 --> 00:03:29,405 - Possibly a world record. 93 00:03:29,405 --> 00:03:30,650 - I'll call Guinness. 94 00:03:30,650 --> 00:03:32,277 - Mm, what are we late again or something? 95 00:03:32,277 --> 00:03:35,550 - All considering classes started last week. 96 00:03:35,550 --> 00:03:37,250 No, no, I'd say we're right on time. 97 00:03:37,250 --> 00:03:38,748 - Mm, all right, give me a second, I'll be ready. 98 00:03:38,748 --> 00:03:39,751 - Atta boy. 99 00:03:39,751 --> 00:03:41,080 (upbeat music) 100 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:44,163 (car engine revving) 101 00:03:55,875 --> 00:03:57,917 ♪ We aint got much but ♪ 102 00:03:57,917 --> 00:04:00,236 ♪ It seems quite enough ♪ 103 00:04:00,236 --> 00:04:01,710 (both chucking) 104 00:04:01,710 --> 00:04:04,070 - Let's go learn, man. 105 00:04:04,070 --> 00:04:05,942 ♪ This is my season ♪ 106 00:04:05,942 --> 00:04:06,775 ♪ Making rhyme reason ♪ 107 00:04:06,775 --> 00:04:08,441 - This kind of looks the staff parking lot... 108 00:04:08,441 --> 00:04:11,285 - I'm surprised they still let us come back here. 109 00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:13,625 Especially with the last year, man. 110 00:04:13,625 --> 00:04:15,506 - Oh yeah, when we shit in that trash can, 111 00:04:15,506 --> 00:04:16,339 oh my God. 112 00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:17,172 - It was in the girls' bathroom, 113 00:04:17,172 --> 00:04:18,627 that was the problem. 114 00:04:18,627 --> 00:04:19,902 - You're gonna be on TV? 115 00:04:19,902 --> 00:04:21,862 - Well, the math doesn't even add up. 116 00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:24,353 Ooh, hey, I don't think we should be here today, man. 117 00:04:24,353 --> 00:04:26,492 - What are you talking about? 118 00:04:26,492 --> 00:04:28,111 Dude, is that- - No, no. 119 00:04:28,111 --> 00:04:30,184 - Is that- - No, it definitely isn't. 120 00:04:30,184 --> 00:04:31,811 - Dude, that's Nichole. - No, it isn't, 121 00:04:31,811 --> 00:04:32,645 it's somebody else. 122 00:04:32,645 --> 00:04:34,494 Hey, you know, I hear your mom calling you. 123 00:04:34,494 --> 00:04:35,491 What's that, Mrs. Barden? 124 00:04:35,491 --> 00:04:39,050 John stole your socks again? - Hey, hey, how do I look? 125 00:04:39,050 --> 00:04:40,188 - You look like a lesbian, 126 00:04:40,188 --> 00:04:41,021 so we should go home and change. 127 00:04:41,021 --> 00:04:42,176 - What does that even mean, man? 128 00:04:42,176 --> 00:04:44,759 (bouncy music) 129 00:04:48,460 --> 00:04:50,880 Having some trouble there? 130 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:52,445 - John? 131 00:04:52,445 --> 00:04:53,837 - Hey, hey! - Oh my God! 132 00:04:53,837 --> 00:04:55,307 - How are you doing? - How are you, 133 00:04:55,307 --> 00:04:56,833 are you still in school? 134 00:04:56,833 --> 00:05:00,236 - Yeah, I took a year off or three, 135 00:05:00,236 --> 00:05:01,353 three years off. 136 00:05:01,353 --> 00:05:02,823 - So you still living with your parents? 137 00:05:02,823 --> 00:05:05,050 - No, no, no, actually they're away for the summer, 138 00:05:05,050 --> 00:05:07,299 so place to myself, you know. 139 00:05:07,299 --> 00:05:08,756 - What class do you have? 140 00:05:08,756 --> 00:05:10,140 - Sociology. 141 00:05:10,140 --> 00:05:12,392 Actually in a couple of minutes with, 142 00:05:12,392 --> 00:05:13,846 you remember Steve? 143 00:05:13,846 --> 00:05:15,679 - Hey! - Oh, come on, dude. 144 00:05:15,679 --> 00:05:17,134 Well, what about you? 145 00:05:17,134 --> 00:05:17,967 What are you doing here? 146 00:05:17,967 --> 00:05:19,712 - Oh, it's a long story. 147 00:05:19,712 --> 00:05:21,351 At the last minute the university decided 148 00:05:21,351 --> 00:05:23,193 to void my AP Chem class, 149 00:05:23,193 --> 00:05:24,907 so I needed to get the credit, 150 00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:26,399 get my masters and. 151 00:05:26,399 --> 00:05:27,654 - That sucks, I'm sorry to hear that. 152 00:05:27,654 --> 00:05:28,487 - Yeah, tell me about it, 153 00:05:28,487 --> 00:05:31,066 but they're letting me audit it here instead of New York, 154 00:05:31,066 --> 00:05:32,190 saves me like 2,000 bucks. 155 00:05:32,190 --> 00:05:34,785 - Oh, yeah, who's teaching that class? 156 00:05:34,785 --> 00:05:35,910 - Williams. 157 00:05:35,910 --> 00:05:38,030 - Oh my God, dude, 158 00:05:38,030 --> 00:05:40,040 we're in that class too. 159 00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:40,912 - Yeah. - Yeah. 160 00:05:40,912 --> 00:05:43,258 - Sure, that's why you missed the first day. 161 00:05:43,258 --> 00:05:46,287 - Well, yeah, I mean we had some scheduling problems, 162 00:05:46,287 --> 00:05:48,430 so you know, we are actually on the way to talk 163 00:05:48,430 --> 00:05:50,332 to professor- - Williams. 164 00:05:50,332 --> 00:05:52,305 - Williams, right now actually. 165 00:05:52,305 --> 00:05:53,230 - Okay. - Yeah. 166 00:05:53,230 --> 00:05:55,906 - Well, I guess I'll see you in class then. 167 00:05:55,906 --> 00:05:58,644 - Yes, you will, study buddies? 168 00:05:58,644 --> 00:06:00,529 - Sure. - All right. 169 00:06:00,529 --> 00:06:01,935 - You look good, John. 170 00:06:01,935 --> 00:06:02,842 - You too. 171 00:06:02,842 --> 00:06:04,892 - Call me? - Yes, absolutely. 172 00:06:04,892 --> 00:06:05,725 - Okay. 173 00:06:07,156 --> 00:06:09,086 - Six years of rehabilitation down the drain. 174 00:06:09,086 --> 00:06:10,842 - We have to get into Chem, man. 175 00:06:10,842 --> 00:06:12,673 - John, I'm your friend, 176 00:06:12,673 --> 00:06:13,560 let's keep it that way. 177 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:15,880 - Let's go to Chem, let's go to Chem. 178 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:17,340 - You're doing that stupid dance 179 00:06:17,340 --> 00:06:18,173 isn't gonna makes me wanna go any faster. 180 00:06:18,173 --> 00:06:19,203 - Let's go to Chem. - I have it, 181 00:06:19,203 --> 00:06:21,453 it's not gonna help anyone. 182 00:06:24,829 --> 00:06:27,052 - Excuse me, Professor Williams. 183 00:06:27,052 --> 00:06:27,885 - Yeah. 184 00:06:28,746 --> 00:06:30,553 - I'm trying to get into your advanced chemistry class, 185 00:06:30,553 --> 00:06:33,302 but they won't let me register without your signature. 186 00:06:33,302 --> 00:06:34,721 - Well, you're a week late. 187 00:06:34,721 --> 00:06:36,874 I'm sorry, I can't catch up now. 188 00:06:36,874 --> 00:06:38,688 You have to wait till next semester to sign up. 189 00:06:38,688 --> 00:06:40,796 - Right, sorry, we wasted your time, come on, man. 190 00:06:40,796 --> 00:06:41,906 - No, no, no, no, no. 191 00:06:41,906 --> 00:06:44,029 Sir, my entire future depends on me getting 192 00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:46,529 into this class this semester. 193 00:06:48,010 --> 00:06:49,266 - You know, this class is no joke. 194 00:06:49,266 --> 00:06:51,183 - And I'm not laughing. 195 00:06:52,110 --> 00:06:54,976 - Okay, what's the atomic weight of Xenon. 196 00:06:54,976 --> 00:06:55,809 - 131.29. 197 00:06:58,245 --> 00:07:00,578 - Wow, welcome to the class. 198 00:07:01,606 --> 00:07:02,478 Catch up on your own, 199 00:07:02,478 --> 00:07:04,991 and we're starting chapter four, Mr? 200 00:07:04,991 --> 00:07:06,657 - Barden, John Barden, 201 00:07:06,657 --> 00:07:08,586 and thank you, you're not gonna regret this really. 202 00:07:08,586 --> 00:07:09,419 Come on. 203 00:07:10,270 --> 00:07:12,972 - Dude, dude, how the hell did you know that? 204 00:07:12,972 --> 00:07:16,034 - Oh dude, you said I was an idiot for buying this shirt. 205 00:07:16,034 --> 00:07:17,935 - I said you were an idiot for buying 20 of those. 206 00:07:17,935 --> 00:07:19,374 - Well, I don't like to do laundry. 207 00:07:19,374 --> 00:07:22,522 (Steve chuckles) 208 00:07:22,522 --> 00:07:24,787 - So anyways, I woke up and I was like, wait, 209 00:07:24,787 --> 00:07:26,147 that was your dog licking me? 210 00:07:26,147 --> 00:07:27,917 'Cause I definitely thought it was you. 211 00:07:27,917 --> 00:07:29,250 It was so weird. 212 00:07:32,632 --> 00:07:33,913 - Well, all the hallways look the same. 213 00:07:33,913 --> 00:07:35,666 - Hey, are we in the sociology wing? 214 00:07:35,666 --> 00:07:37,200 Cause I don't understand. 215 00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:39,084 - Wait, hold on, let me ask. 216 00:07:39,084 --> 00:07:41,374 Excuse me, oh, ah, sorry. 217 00:07:41,374 --> 00:07:42,561 - Are they meditating in there? 218 00:07:42,561 --> 00:07:44,160 - Yeah, how do we get into that class? 219 00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:46,121 - Right, couldn't you just sleep the entire time, 220 00:07:46,121 --> 00:07:47,260 and pass that class? 221 00:07:47,260 --> 00:07:49,773 - I'd get an A plus plus for sure. 222 00:07:49,773 --> 00:07:51,164 (upbeat music) 223 00:07:51,164 --> 00:07:55,939 - Now as you know Sociology is a science, 224 00:07:56,802 --> 00:08:01,175 and there're many times when the rules of sociology 225 00:08:01,175 --> 00:08:03,084 combine with science, 226 00:08:03,084 --> 00:08:06,501 and one of those would be the incarnation 227 00:08:07,868 --> 00:08:09,951 of the modern "toofbrush." 228 00:08:14,767 --> 00:08:16,267 Boys, you is late. 229 00:08:17,901 --> 00:08:19,257 - We is? 230 00:08:19,257 --> 00:08:20,622 We sorry. 231 00:08:20,622 --> 00:08:22,300 - Yeah, we got stuck in our other class, 232 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:23,984 the professor held us late. 233 00:08:23,984 --> 00:08:25,984 - And who might that be? 234 00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:32,440 - Professor Defringsdingbergnessner. 235 00:08:33,939 --> 00:08:35,050 - Who? 236 00:08:35,050 --> 00:08:38,133 - Professor Defringsdingbergnessner. 237 00:08:39,045 --> 00:08:41,163 - Defringsdingbergnessner. 238 00:08:41,163 --> 00:08:42,496 Oh, I knows him. 239 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:45,273 You know what? 240 00:08:45,273 --> 00:08:46,936 I'll have a chat on him later on. 241 00:08:46,936 --> 00:08:48,731 Make sure he don't keep my boys after anymore. 242 00:08:48,731 --> 00:08:49,564 - Oh, thank you very much. 243 00:08:49,564 --> 00:08:51,141 We'd really appreciate that. 244 00:08:51,141 --> 00:08:51,974 - You bet. 245 00:08:52,978 --> 00:08:53,931 - What are your names, boys? 246 00:08:53,931 --> 00:08:57,425 I gotta write in roll book over yonder. 247 00:08:57,425 --> 00:08:58,513 - John Barden. 248 00:08:58,513 --> 00:08:59,346 - Steve. 249 00:09:01,231 --> 00:09:03,115 This guy's a complete freaking idiot. 250 00:09:03,115 --> 00:09:05,282 - He's gotta be faking it. 251 00:09:07,871 --> 00:09:08,704 - Okay. 252 00:09:12,355 --> 00:09:13,355 Where was I? 253 00:09:14,330 --> 00:09:15,691 - "Toofbrush?" 254 00:09:15,691 --> 00:09:18,806 - "Toofbrush," yes, thank you very much. 255 00:09:18,806 --> 00:09:21,420 We need to talk about the "toofbrush," 256 00:09:21,420 --> 00:09:25,679 and its effects on society as we know it today. 257 00:09:26,999 --> 00:09:28,317 Before we start, 258 00:09:28,317 --> 00:09:32,659 does anybody have any questions or comments? 259 00:09:32,659 --> 00:09:35,092 Yes, Willie. 260 00:09:36,195 --> 00:09:41,125 - Sure, I think that the "toofbrush" is a necessary evil. 261 00:09:41,125 --> 00:09:42,943 - Yes, it is. 262 00:09:42,943 --> 00:09:44,635 I believe that too. 263 00:09:44,635 --> 00:09:47,879 The "toofbrush" or mouth stick 264 00:09:47,879 --> 00:09:50,692 as it was called frequently back in the day 265 00:09:50,692 --> 00:09:55,684 was invented in 1654 by Sir Walter Toof. 266 00:09:59,134 --> 00:09:59,967 - Hey? 267 00:10:00,990 --> 00:10:02,383 What are you doing? 268 00:10:02,383 --> 00:10:03,986 - Taking notes. 269 00:10:03,986 --> 00:10:06,146 Seriously, leave me alone. 270 00:10:06,146 --> 00:10:08,271 I'm trying to get something from this class. 271 00:10:08,271 --> 00:10:09,104 - From this guy, 272 00:10:09,104 --> 00:10:10,087 are you kidding me? 273 00:10:10,087 --> 00:10:12,146 The only thing you're gonna get is lost. 274 00:10:12,146 --> 00:10:14,189 All right, tell you what? 275 00:10:14,189 --> 00:10:16,627 You're better off coming back to my place, 276 00:10:16,627 --> 00:10:18,992 and trying on my mouth stick. 277 00:10:18,992 --> 00:10:20,736 - You are so sick. 278 00:10:20,736 --> 00:10:23,642 - Oh my God, could you keep it down, please? 279 00:10:23,642 --> 00:10:25,872 Some of us are actually trying to do well in this class. 280 00:10:25,872 --> 00:10:27,611 - Unbelievable some people, 281 00:10:27,611 --> 00:10:30,352 the lack of respect for a tenured professor. 282 00:10:30,352 --> 00:10:31,185 - Thank you. 283 00:10:31,185 --> 00:10:32,592 Yes, young lady, 284 00:10:32,592 --> 00:10:34,842 please try to keep it down. 285 00:10:36,738 --> 00:10:39,583 Let's get back to the lesson. 286 00:10:39,583 --> 00:10:42,200 Similar to the caste system in India, 287 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,947 the toothbrush made way 288 00:10:43,947 --> 00:10:48,091 for a bunch of advantaged people here in the new world, 289 00:10:48,091 --> 00:10:49,289 and we could even- 290 00:10:49,289 --> 00:10:52,388 (phone rings) 291 00:10:52,388 --> 00:10:55,721 - Now class, must I repeat myself again? 292 00:10:58,672 --> 00:11:02,904 There is no room for that gadgetry junk here 293 00:11:02,904 --> 00:11:04,400 here while I am teaching, 294 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:05,672 not in my classroom. 295 00:11:05,672 --> 00:11:07,906 Sir, come here, give that to me. 296 00:11:07,906 --> 00:11:08,739 Bring that up here, 297 00:11:08,739 --> 00:11:11,079 I will hold your junk till the end of class. 298 00:11:11,079 --> 00:11:12,485 (John laughs) 299 00:11:12,485 --> 00:11:13,318 - Shut up. 300 00:11:13,318 --> 00:11:14,151 - Come on. 301 00:11:15,726 --> 00:11:17,393 Do not believe this. 302 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:19,378 Just give me that. 303 00:11:19,378 --> 00:11:20,211 Thank you. 304 00:11:21,650 --> 00:11:24,198 Hmm, she's gotta be cold. 305 00:11:24,198 --> 00:11:25,448 - Was he gentle with your junk? 306 00:11:25,448 --> 00:11:26,992 - Shut the fuck up, John. 307 00:11:26,992 --> 00:11:27,992 - All right. 308 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:32,285 So they were using towels for the longest time 309 00:11:32,285 --> 00:11:33,678 before the toothbrush... 310 00:11:33,678 --> 00:11:37,704 (music drowns out professor) 311 00:11:37,704 --> 00:11:40,571 (upbeat music) 312 00:11:40,571 --> 00:11:42,337 ♪ I can't explain what it is ♪ 313 00:11:42,337 --> 00:11:47,275 ♪ That you do to me ♪ 314 00:11:47,275 --> 00:11:48,108 ♪ Yeah, I can't eat ♪ 315 00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:48,941 ♪ I can't sleep ♪ 316 00:11:48,941 --> 00:11:52,525 ♪ I can barely breathe ♪ 317 00:11:52,525 --> 00:11:55,063 - 101.2, it's John the bartender here 318 00:11:55,063 --> 00:11:58,710 with the finger deep into your local talents. 319 00:11:58,710 --> 00:12:01,406 That was Phonetic Plumbing with Llarry. 320 00:12:01,406 --> 00:12:03,867 Up next, we got Wood with their hit song, 321 00:12:03,867 --> 00:12:05,969 and then a little Champagne Cupcake Trio 322 00:12:05,969 --> 00:12:06,928 to finish the night off, 323 00:12:06,928 --> 00:12:11,092 so stay with us as long as you can keep your eyes open. 324 00:12:11,092 --> 00:12:12,258 101.2. 325 00:12:17,580 --> 00:12:19,332 Just when I thought I was out, 326 00:12:19,332 --> 00:12:21,499 she pulls me back in boys. 327 00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,906 - Oh, did you just quote "The Godfather" three? 328 00:12:24,906 --> 00:12:28,989 - I think I just died a little bit on the inside. 329 00:12:29,885 --> 00:12:33,903 - We should get chicken on the way home. 330 00:12:33,903 --> 00:12:35,301 - You guys suck. 331 00:12:35,301 --> 00:12:36,218 - You suck. 332 00:12:37,105 --> 00:12:40,299 (phone rings) 333 00:12:40,299 --> 00:12:41,299 - Hey Roger, 334 00:12:43,249 --> 00:12:45,458 No, no, no, man, Saturdays, I don't work ever, 335 00:12:45,458 --> 00:12:47,791 so you're gonna have to reschedule that or something. 336 00:12:47,791 --> 00:12:48,624 Stop! 337 00:12:49,765 --> 00:12:52,354 No, no man, Saturdays, I really can't help you. 338 00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:53,702 Okay, I'm sorry, 339 00:12:53,702 --> 00:12:56,322 and I'm sorry for your loss too. 340 00:12:56,322 --> 00:12:57,870 Can you stop? 341 00:12:57,870 --> 00:13:00,453 (upbeat music) 342 00:13:02,507 --> 00:13:05,340 ♪ It's gotta be against the law to look this damn good ♪ 343 00:13:05,340 --> 00:13:07,075 ♪ Watch out now ♪ 344 00:13:07,075 --> 00:13:09,658 ♪ 'Cause baby I feel real and I wish I would ♪ 345 00:13:09,658 --> 00:13:11,656 ♪ Watch out now ♪ 346 00:13:11,656 --> 00:13:14,278 ♪ It's gotta be against the law to look this damn good ♪ 347 00:13:14,278 --> 00:13:16,104 ♪ Watch out now ♪ 348 00:13:16,104 --> 00:13:18,918 ♪ Everybody watch out ♪ 349 00:13:18,918 --> 00:13:19,985 ♪ Watch out now ♪ 350 00:13:19,985 --> 00:13:20,818 Hello! 351 00:13:21,758 --> 00:13:23,696 - Hi, do you have an application? 352 00:13:23,696 --> 00:13:24,650 - Yes, I do. 353 00:13:24,650 --> 00:13:26,170 - I'm Steve, Steve Dillard, 354 00:13:26,170 --> 00:13:27,003 and you are? 355 00:13:27,003 --> 00:13:28,749 - Cindy Pressman. 356 00:13:28,749 --> 00:13:31,036 - And you must be Cindy's sister 357 00:13:31,036 --> 00:13:33,249 - (chuckles) Cindy, I like this one. 358 00:13:33,249 --> 00:13:36,002 Hello, you're a sweet talker, aren't you? 359 00:13:36,002 --> 00:13:36,999 My name is aunt Shelly, 360 00:13:36,999 --> 00:13:38,155 I'm Cindy's aunt Shelly, 361 00:13:38,155 --> 00:13:40,822 but you can call me aunt Shelly. 362 00:13:41,804 --> 00:13:43,443 - Aunt Shelly. - Mm-hmm. 363 00:13:43,443 --> 00:13:44,926 - I love it. 364 00:13:44,926 --> 00:13:46,728 - Do you wanna go get that application? 365 00:13:46,728 --> 00:13:48,259 Follow me. 366 00:13:48,259 --> 00:13:49,092 Excuse me. 367 00:13:55,993 --> 00:14:00,842 - Right, everything here looks... 368 00:14:00,842 --> 00:14:04,991 sexy- um... satisfactory. 369 00:14:04,991 --> 00:14:07,083 Unfortunately, they're gonna make me ask you 370 00:14:07,083 --> 00:14:08,182 a couple of questions, 371 00:14:08,182 --> 00:14:12,664 so I see you are a senior at Olympia. 372 00:14:12,664 --> 00:14:13,681 - Yes. 373 00:14:13,681 --> 00:14:17,238 - Right, so what made you want to apply here? 374 00:14:17,238 --> 00:14:18,071 - I don't know, 375 00:14:18,071 --> 00:14:19,100 I like movies. 376 00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:20,223 - No way, I do too, 377 00:14:20,223 --> 00:14:21,556 that's so crazy. 378 00:14:22,431 --> 00:14:25,517 I see you have a birthday coming up. 379 00:14:25,517 --> 00:14:28,584 - In two months? - Yeah, Yeah. 380 00:14:28,584 --> 00:14:32,751 So how do you feel about fondling, handling money, 381 00:14:34,159 --> 00:14:36,439 like out of the cash registers? 382 00:14:36,439 --> 00:14:37,310 - Okay, I guess. 383 00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:38,244 - Yeah. 384 00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:41,860 You held a lot of other positions? 385 00:14:41,860 --> 00:14:43,400 - Positions? 386 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:44,958 - Oh jobs, sorry. 387 00:14:44,958 --> 00:14:47,345 - Oh, jobs, I babysat. 388 00:14:47,345 --> 00:14:50,069 - Great, how about weekends? 389 00:14:50,069 --> 00:14:52,489 - Yeah, I used to babysit on the weekends. 390 00:14:52,489 --> 00:14:55,606 - No, like are you free on the weekends? 391 00:14:55,606 --> 00:14:57,791 - Well, not if I'm working. 392 00:14:57,791 --> 00:14:59,624 - Right, you're smart. 393 00:15:00,939 --> 00:15:03,210 Okay, if the phone were to ring right now, 394 00:15:03,210 --> 00:15:05,986 how would you answer it? 395 00:15:05,986 --> 00:15:07,778 - How complicated are your phones? 396 00:15:07,778 --> 00:15:10,195 I've only used normal phones. 397 00:15:11,772 --> 00:15:13,037 - That's an unfair question, 398 00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,504 and I'm not gonna ask it again. 399 00:15:14,504 --> 00:15:17,337 - Okay, what about transportation? 400 00:15:18,223 --> 00:15:19,056 - I don't have a car, 401 00:15:19,056 --> 00:15:20,880 but my uncle Zeke could probably give me a ride. 402 00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:22,463 - Yeah, uncle Zeke. 403 00:15:26,297 --> 00:15:29,475 (blows raspberries) You are so hired. (laughs) 404 00:15:29,475 --> 00:15:32,580 So when can you start? - Next weekend? 405 00:15:32,580 --> 00:15:37,580 - Great, how is Saturday at one? 406 00:15:37,625 --> 00:15:39,053 - Great, I'll be here. 407 00:15:39,053 --> 00:15:42,006 - And so will I. 408 00:15:42,006 --> 00:15:44,050 (upbeat music) 409 00:15:44,050 --> 00:15:45,297 I can't wait, it's gonna be so fun. 410 00:15:45,297 --> 00:15:46,369 (Cindy chuckles) 411 00:15:46,369 --> 00:15:47,516 Throwing pop corn at each other, 412 00:15:47,516 --> 00:15:49,231 no, I can't 'cause then I'll have to clean it up 413 00:15:49,231 --> 00:15:51,012 and I'm not gonna do that. 414 00:15:51,012 --> 00:15:53,595 (upbeat music) 415 00:16:00,185 --> 00:16:01,829 - Hey. 416 00:16:01,829 --> 00:16:03,579 - Wow, you actually made it. 417 00:16:03,579 --> 00:16:04,728 I'm impressed. 418 00:16:04,728 --> 00:16:05,995 How'd you get into this class? 419 00:16:05,995 --> 00:16:09,175 - I've got some dirt on the professor. 420 00:16:09,175 --> 00:16:11,730 - Notebook, textbook, pen? 421 00:16:11,730 --> 00:16:14,230 - You've got all those, right? 422 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,165 - Thank you. - Some things never change. 423 00:16:20,165 --> 00:16:23,539 - Okay, we'll be starting with chapter four today; 424 00:16:23,539 --> 00:16:26,516 Self-organization principles of molecules 425 00:16:26,516 --> 00:16:28,239 under extreme pressure. 426 00:16:28,239 --> 00:16:29,596 - I'm glad you're here, John. 427 00:16:29,596 --> 00:16:31,085 It feels so familiar. 428 00:16:31,085 --> 00:16:33,090 - Well, happy to be entertaining you. 429 00:16:33,090 --> 00:16:35,033 We should get together though after this, you know, 430 00:16:35,033 --> 00:16:37,178 and just catch up and talk. 431 00:16:37,178 --> 00:16:38,051 - Yeah. - Yeah. 432 00:16:38,051 --> 00:16:38,884 - I'd like that. 433 00:16:38,884 --> 00:16:41,015 - When placed under intense pressure. 434 00:16:41,015 --> 00:16:43,689 These noble gases tend to act like 435 00:16:43,689 --> 00:16:46,272 what other elements Mr. Barden? 436 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:49,752 - I'm sorry, sir, 437 00:16:49,752 --> 00:16:53,710 I'm actually still getting acclimated with the material. 438 00:16:53,710 --> 00:16:56,710 - Okay, but no excuses next class. 439 00:16:58,093 --> 00:17:00,676 (upbeat music) 440 00:17:06,894 --> 00:17:10,123 - Okay class, now everyone's needing to be getting settled. 441 00:17:10,123 --> 00:17:14,184 Now don't forget your papers is due next class, 442 00:17:14,184 --> 00:17:15,556 so don't forget 'em. 443 00:17:15,556 --> 00:17:19,448 I aims to get 'em graded by the weekend. 444 00:17:19,448 --> 00:17:20,618 Oh good, you're here. 445 00:17:20,618 --> 00:17:22,629 See, I told you guys he'd show up. 446 00:17:22,629 --> 00:17:24,600 They were gonna leave. 447 00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:26,119 - Were some of y'all gonna leave? 448 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:27,137 - Yeah, well some of them were, 449 00:17:27,137 --> 00:17:28,487 but I stopped them, so. 450 00:17:28,487 --> 00:17:29,904 - Thank you, son. 451 00:17:33,869 --> 00:17:34,837 - Smooth. 452 00:17:34,837 --> 00:17:35,925 - You're such a fucking prick, 453 00:17:35,925 --> 00:17:37,043 you know that? 454 00:17:37,043 --> 00:17:40,330 - Honey, I am the macaroni and the cheese. 455 00:17:40,330 --> 00:17:43,309 (John laughs) 456 00:17:43,309 --> 00:17:46,476 (ambient piano music) 457 00:18:03,435 --> 00:18:05,078 - Hey, you made it. 458 00:18:05,078 --> 00:18:06,819 Let me get you one of these. 459 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:08,554 - Wow! - Don't spill. 460 00:18:08,554 --> 00:18:10,520 - This place hasn't changed a bit. 461 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:11,913 - Are you kidding me? 462 00:18:11,913 --> 00:18:14,079 This place used to be nasty. 463 00:18:14,079 --> 00:18:15,858 There used to be used condoms, 464 00:18:15,858 --> 00:18:18,724 and syringes, and hobos fucking over there and stuff. 465 00:18:18,724 --> 00:18:20,724 This place looks great now. 466 00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:22,888 - No, I don't remember all of that. 467 00:18:22,888 --> 00:18:26,003 I guess we didn't really make it out of the backseat. 468 00:18:26,003 --> 00:18:27,636 - This was kind of our spot, huh? 469 00:18:27,636 --> 00:18:29,569 - It's kinda everyone's spot. 470 00:18:29,569 --> 00:18:32,681 Half the girls I know were here at one point or another. 471 00:18:32,681 --> 00:18:34,106 - This place is kind of crazy like that. 472 00:18:34,106 --> 00:18:38,069 It's got some sorta wild sexual vibe about it, you know? 473 00:18:38,069 --> 00:18:39,272 You know the guys around town actually call it 474 00:18:39,272 --> 00:18:40,407 the pussy vortex. 475 00:18:40,407 --> 00:18:42,308 - That's disgusting. 476 00:18:42,308 --> 00:18:43,991 - Okay, well, by other guys around town, 477 00:18:43,991 --> 00:18:46,324 I actually just mean, Steve. 478 00:18:47,809 --> 00:18:50,858 - Why do you still hang out with him? 479 00:18:50,858 --> 00:18:52,580 - I don't know, 480 00:18:52,580 --> 00:18:54,285 he's a good friend. 481 00:18:54,285 --> 00:18:57,035 He's there, he's there, you know. 482 00:18:57,915 --> 00:19:00,588 - That's something, I guess. 483 00:19:00,588 --> 00:19:04,780 I just thought you'd be doing something by now. 484 00:19:04,780 --> 00:19:06,815 You had a lot of plans, John. 485 00:19:06,815 --> 00:19:08,065 - Yeah, I know. 486 00:19:09,134 --> 00:19:09,967 I know. 487 00:19:10,845 --> 00:19:12,362 I'm on the radio now. 488 00:19:12,362 --> 00:19:15,020 It's the night shifts for 101.2. 489 00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:16,794 You remember? 490 00:19:16,794 --> 00:19:19,843 I get to play all the local band's new music 491 00:19:19,843 --> 00:19:21,355 that can't get on during the day, 492 00:19:21,355 --> 00:19:23,862 so I mean, that's cool. 493 00:19:23,862 --> 00:19:24,695 My boss hates me now, 494 00:19:24,695 --> 00:19:26,906 he's a fucking dick. 495 00:19:26,906 --> 00:19:29,157 He just thinks I'm some sort of a fuck up, you know? 496 00:19:29,157 --> 00:19:33,507 I may be a weirdo, yes, but I'm not a fuck up. 497 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:37,713 I'm not where I want to be at all in my life, 498 00:19:37,713 --> 00:19:40,213 I still got ideas, just... 499 00:19:43,181 --> 00:19:44,538 Forget it. 500 00:19:44,538 --> 00:19:45,371 What about you, 501 00:19:45,371 --> 00:19:47,040 what's new with you. 502 00:19:47,040 --> 00:19:47,913 - I'm engaged. 503 00:19:47,913 --> 00:19:50,114 (record scratches) 504 00:19:50,114 --> 00:19:51,281 - Um, engaged? 505 00:19:52,765 --> 00:19:56,655 - Yep, he's a professor in New York city. 506 00:19:56,655 --> 00:19:58,462 We're not engaged, engaged. 507 00:19:58,462 --> 00:20:02,351 He still has to finalize his divorce first, but- 508 00:20:02,351 --> 00:20:04,874 - I'm sorry? - I know how it sounds. 509 00:20:04,874 --> 00:20:06,041 - Okay? - Okay. 510 00:20:06,907 --> 00:20:08,740 But this is different. 511 00:20:09,874 --> 00:20:11,291 He listens to me. 512 00:20:12,976 --> 00:20:14,856 - Look, all right. 513 00:20:14,856 --> 00:20:16,255 I'm happy you found someone. 514 00:20:16,255 --> 00:20:17,758 Okay, really, I am. 515 00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:18,591 - Thanks. 516 00:20:19,732 --> 00:20:22,026 Most of my friends aren't very understanding. 517 00:20:22,026 --> 00:20:24,273 - Ah, well, they're probably just thinking 518 00:20:24,273 --> 00:20:27,269 about what they want instead of what you want, you know. 519 00:20:27,269 --> 00:20:28,581 People can be like that sometimes. 520 00:20:28,581 --> 00:20:29,414 - I know. 521 00:20:31,488 --> 00:20:33,749 Thanks for being supportive. 522 00:20:33,749 --> 00:20:35,416 - Of course, I'm happy for you, 523 00:20:35,416 --> 00:20:36,499 really, I am. 524 00:20:38,965 --> 00:20:40,761 - Oh, well I guess that's it. 525 00:20:40,761 --> 00:20:43,257 You're just gonna have to move on, that sucks. 526 00:20:43,257 --> 00:20:45,070 There are other fish in the sea though. 527 00:20:45,070 --> 00:20:46,389 - So, shit, man. 528 00:20:46,389 --> 00:20:47,907 I'm still in the game. 529 00:20:47,907 --> 00:20:49,004 It's just the first quarter, 530 00:20:49,004 --> 00:20:51,268 and contrary to popular belief, 531 00:20:51,268 --> 00:20:52,965 I have endurance. 532 00:20:52,965 --> 00:20:54,477 - John, you need to forget 533 00:20:54,477 --> 00:20:56,640 about Nichole completely, all right? 534 00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:58,520 Get yourself a safe girl. 535 00:20:58,520 --> 00:20:59,668 - What like a high school girl? 536 00:20:59,668 --> 00:21:00,565 - Hey, you know what? 537 00:21:00,565 --> 00:21:02,913 Much like this mix of hops and heaven. 538 00:21:02,913 --> 00:21:05,098 It is an acquired taste. 539 00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:05,931 - I don't know, man, 540 00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:09,402 high school girls seem a little immature for my taste. 541 00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:10,874 - Oh no, oh no, Steve. 542 00:21:10,874 --> 00:21:11,707 Oh no, he's back. 543 00:21:11,707 --> 00:21:14,436 Oh, oh, oh, no, he's attacking me Steve. 544 00:21:14,436 --> 00:21:16,357 Steve, Steve, help me, Steve. 545 00:21:16,357 --> 00:21:18,078 Oh, oh, no! 546 00:21:18,078 --> 00:21:20,661 (upbeat music) 547 00:21:36,117 --> 00:21:36,950 Fuck! 548 00:21:36,950 --> 00:21:37,895 - Jenga, Bitch! 549 00:21:37,895 --> 00:21:40,177 - Oh, don't pretend you didn't like that. 550 00:21:40,177 --> 00:21:42,445 - Asshole. - Exactly. 551 00:21:42,445 --> 00:21:45,550 Ready to get to your sociology on? 552 00:21:45,550 --> 00:21:46,964 You wrote your paper? 553 00:21:46,964 --> 00:21:48,235 - Not even a little bit. 554 00:21:48,235 --> 00:21:49,300 - You? 555 00:21:49,300 --> 00:21:51,383 - Who are you talking to? 556 00:21:57,202 --> 00:21:59,004 Hi, yes, Professor Robertson. 557 00:21:59,004 --> 00:22:02,500 This is Steve Dillard from class. 558 00:22:02,500 --> 00:22:04,458 No, sir, you don't teach trigonometry. 559 00:22:04,458 --> 00:22:06,885 Your sociology 101 class. 560 00:22:06,885 --> 00:22:09,479 Yeah, yeah, the one that starts in 20 minutes. 561 00:22:09,479 --> 00:22:10,912 Yeah, I was just calling to let you know 562 00:22:10,912 --> 00:22:14,062 that John Barden and I are not gonna be, 563 00:22:14,062 --> 00:22:15,283 John Barden. 564 00:22:15,283 --> 00:22:16,893 Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's in the class too, 565 00:22:16,893 --> 00:22:18,979 we're both in the class. 566 00:22:18,979 --> 00:22:19,841 I was just calling to let you know 567 00:22:19,841 --> 00:22:21,674 that our grandma died. 568 00:22:22,979 --> 00:22:26,133 So we aren't gonna be able to make it. 569 00:22:26,133 --> 00:22:27,659 Yes, yes, absolutely, sir, 570 00:22:27,659 --> 00:22:29,048 we will get those papers e-mailed 571 00:22:29,048 --> 00:22:31,436 to you the second, the funeral ends. 572 00:22:31,436 --> 00:22:34,478 Thank you so much, Professor Robertson. 573 00:22:34,478 --> 00:22:37,136 - (claps) Well done, Ferris. 574 00:22:37,136 --> 00:22:38,467 Really, good job. 575 00:22:38,467 --> 00:22:40,188 What about my chemistry class? 576 00:22:40,188 --> 00:22:42,182 - I think I have a blank death certificate 577 00:22:42,182 --> 00:22:43,567 you can borrow if you want. 578 00:22:43,567 --> 00:22:45,393 What are you just printing $50 bills 579 00:22:45,393 --> 00:22:48,043 in the basement or something? 580 00:22:48,043 --> 00:22:51,126 - Oh John, you have so much to learn. 581 00:22:54,575 --> 00:22:55,929 - Okay, that was cool. 582 00:22:55,929 --> 00:22:56,987 - Yeah, right. - That was cool. 583 00:22:56,987 --> 00:22:59,340 - I didn't even think it was gonna happen like that. 584 00:22:59,340 --> 00:23:00,440 It just kind of did. 585 00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:03,023 (upbeat music) 586 00:23:22,692 --> 00:23:27,692 - And so it was the peer pressure from the deviant apes 587 00:23:28,101 --> 00:23:32,053 that made the good apes start smoking the leaves. 588 00:23:32,053 --> 00:23:35,853 And I don't have to tell you who that precipitated 589 00:23:35,853 --> 00:23:37,520 the human evolution. 590 00:23:38,470 --> 00:23:42,979 (sighs) Guys, you is late again. 591 00:23:42,979 --> 00:23:45,767 What am I gonna do with you? 592 00:23:45,767 --> 00:23:46,600 - Yeah, sorry. 593 00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,100 Hey, did you grade our papers? 594 00:23:52,540 --> 00:23:55,512 - Well, apparently you boys never turned them in. 595 00:23:55,512 --> 00:23:57,804 - Whoa, hey, whoa, well, we called you remember? 596 00:23:57,804 --> 00:24:00,128 Dead grandma? Grandma's dead. 597 00:24:00,128 --> 00:24:02,708 - Well, wait, wait, wait, wait, you know, 598 00:24:02,708 --> 00:24:04,993 I think I do remember something about that. 599 00:24:04,993 --> 00:24:07,399 Yeah, it's coming back to me. 600 00:24:07,399 --> 00:24:08,748 - Yeah, yeah, we e-mailed them. 601 00:24:08,748 --> 00:24:10,908 It says right here you got 'em. 602 00:24:10,908 --> 00:24:12,945 - I'm sure they're down in my office. 603 00:24:12,945 --> 00:24:14,705 After class, meet down in my office, 604 00:24:14,705 --> 00:24:16,034 and we'll go over all of this, 605 00:24:16,034 --> 00:24:17,997 we'll get it squared away. - Yeah. 606 00:24:17,997 --> 00:24:18,990 - Thank you, boys. 607 00:24:18,990 --> 00:24:19,979 (both chuckling) 608 00:24:19,979 --> 00:24:20,812 - Wow! 609 00:24:20,812 --> 00:24:24,167 - So let's get back now to our lesson. 610 00:24:24,167 --> 00:24:25,717 You say it's evolution. 611 00:24:25,717 --> 00:24:27,499 Some say it's evolution. 612 00:24:27,499 --> 00:24:29,756 I just say it's lution. 613 00:24:29,756 --> 00:24:31,040 Doesn't matter. 614 00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:32,527 Lution is lution. 615 00:24:32,527 --> 00:24:34,138 - Sort of one of going that night, 616 00:24:34,138 --> 00:24:36,348 but then I found out that they brought in like a midget, 617 00:24:36,348 --> 00:24:39,343 and a flame thrower and it was so hot. 618 00:24:39,343 --> 00:24:40,260 - Oh! - Wow! 619 00:24:41,764 --> 00:24:43,793 - What the fuck? - Oh! 620 00:24:43,793 --> 00:24:44,626 - Oh hey. - Oh, wait, wait, 621 00:24:44,626 --> 00:24:45,707 what the hell are you guys doing here? 622 00:24:45,707 --> 00:24:47,661 Shouldn't you be playing like Frogger or something? 623 00:24:47,661 --> 00:24:51,893 - Oh, we're looking for the psychology department. 624 00:24:51,893 --> 00:24:53,296 - Yeah, yeah, they're paying five bucks 625 00:24:53,296 --> 00:24:54,978 for some negative reinforcement testing, 626 00:24:54,978 --> 00:24:56,364 and oh, we're hungry. 627 00:24:56,364 --> 00:24:57,550 - $5 foot long day. 628 00:24:57,550 --> 00:24:59,739 - Mm, $5 foot long. 629 00:24:59,739 --> 00:25:01,562 - You know, all right, whatever, guys. 630 00:25:01,562 --> 00:25:03,202 I'll see you back at my house 631 00:25:03,202 --> 00:25:04,244 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah. 632 00:25:04,244 --> 00:25:05,077 - Yeah, awesome. 633 00:25:05,077 --> 00:25:06,221 All right, so shoo! 634 00:25:06,221 --> 00:25:07,221 - Thank you. 635 00:25:09,062 --> 00:25:10,951 - You know I didn't know their asses weren't cemented 636 00:25:10,951 --> 00:25:11,967 to your couch cushion, 637 00:25:11,967 --> 00:25:14,341 so that's pretty weird. 638 00:25:14,341 --> 00:25:15,639 (John knocks) 639 00:25:15,639 --> 00:25:17,440 - Who's there? 640 00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:18,696 - John. - Come in. 641 00:25:18,696 --> 00:25:20,192 - Steve. - Well, come in. 642 00:25:20,192 --> 00:25:21,863 Yeah, it's like the joke, knock, knock, 643 00:25:21,863 --> 00:25:23,423 and then I said who's there. 644 00:25:23,423 --> 00:25:24,256 - Oh! - Oh. 645 00:25:26,368 --> 00:25:28,755 - Hi, what can I do you for? 646 00:25:28,755 --> 00:25:31,176 - Did you find our papers yet? 647 00:25:31,176 --> 00:25:32,434 - No. 648 00:25:32,434 --> 00:25:36,177 Good, I know it is here somewhere. 649 00:25:36,177 --> 00:25:37,010 I had it. 650 00:25:37,010 --> 00:25:38,726 It's messy here. 651 00:25:40,342 --> 00:25:43,767 - Do you need us to resend them? 652 00:25:43,767 --> 00:25:46,010 - No, no, no, no, this is my fault. 653 00:25:46,010 --> 00:25:47,210 This is all my fault. 654 00:25:47,210 --> 00:25:50,079 It is, I've been busy and you know, 655 00:25:50,079 --> 00:25:51,341 and you, I remember yours, 656 00:25:51,341 --> 00:25:52,214 it was a good paper, 657 00:25:52,214 --> 00:25:54,002 you did a good job, 658 00:25:54,002 --> 00:25:55,697 a very good job. 659 00:25:55,697 --> 00:25:56,646 You know what? 660 00:25:56,646 --> 00:25:58,877 Let's just cut to the otters head, 661 00:25:58,877 --> 00:26:00,544 and what do you say? 662 00:26:03,585 --> 00:26:05,891 We'll give you a 98. 663 00:26:05,891 --> 00:26:06,808 98 for you, 664 00:26:07,744 --> 00:26:10,250 and for you a 98, right? 665 00:26:10,250 --> 00:26:12,301 - Oh no, no, no, mine wasn't as good as his. 666 00:26:12,301 --> 00:26:14,171 - You're right, 81, 81. 667 00:26:14,171 --> 00:26:15,006 We'll just do that, 668 00:26:15,006 --> 00:26:15,839 that's a B, 669 00:26:15,839 --> 00:26:16,672 and B is good. 670 00:26:16,672 --> 00:26:17,505 I like B. 671 00:26:18,843 --> 00:26:20,562 Well, you know, I do appreciate your waiting, 672 00:26:20,562 --> 00:26:22,568 and again, I do apologize for this. 673 00:26:22,568 --> 00:26:24,357 Sometimes, you know, this comes up, 674 00:26:24,357 --> 00:26:26,638 and it's piling up higher and higher, 675 00:26:26,638 --> 00:26:29,563 and I know that somewhere inside here I have, 676 00:26:29,563 --> 00:26:31,167 I know it's here, but. 677 00:26:31,167 --> 00:26:32,000 - No, no, no, no. 678 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:33,594 Hey, hey, our grandma's shouldn't have died. 679 00:26:33,594 --> 00:26:35,603 - No, she shouldn't have. - What an idiot, right? 680 00:26:35,603 --> 00:26:37,403 - You know, I just, you know, you can't, 681 00:26:37,403 --> 00:26:38,440 it's not her fault, 682 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,408 but it kinda is. - A little, a little. 683 00:26:40,408 --> 00:26:41,621 - They can plan a little better. 684 00:26:41,621 --> 00:26:42,654 Why don't you get out of here now? 685 00:26:42,654 --> 00:26:44,706 Because I got some lots of stuff to do, 686 00:26:44,706 --> 00:26:46,542 and I gotta find another paper. 687 00:26:46,542 --> 00:26:47,398 - Absolutely. - Yeah. 688 00:26:47,398 --> 00:26:48,393 - All right, and you take care now. 689 00:26:48,393 --> 00:26:51,097 Whoa, one of you guys dropped a deuce or something? 690 00:26:51,097 --> 00:26:55,773 - (laughs) and ah, I win. - What? 691 00:26:55,773 --> 00:26:57,246 - I am the best. - Fucking cheater, 692 00:26:57,246 --> 00:26:58,115 that's what you are. 693 00:26:58,115 --> 00:27:00,127 - I get the mozzarella stick here. 694 00:27:00,127 --> 00:27:01,639 - Oh, bullshit. 695 00:27:01,639 --> 00:27:02,976 Pick up a joy and let's go again. 696 00:27:02,976 --> 00:27:04,577 - Smells like victory. - Again. 697 00:27:04,577 --> 00:27:05,616 - Run it back! 698 00:27:05,616 --> 00:27:08,199 (upbeat music) 699 00:27:09,470 --> 00:27:11,641 - Okay, so when a new movie comes in, 700 00:27:11,641 --> 00:27:13,651 it comes in on one of these hard drives. 701 00:27:13,651 --> 00:27:14,660 You know, it's not like the old days 702 00:27:14,660 --> 00:27:16,729 where it came in on multiple reels, 703 00:27:16,729 --> 00:27:19,287 you had to splice the film together. 704 00:27:19,287 --> 00:27:20,431 Okay, whatever. 705 00:27:20,431 --> 00:27:22,656 So anyways, when a new movie comes in, 706 00:27:22,656 --> 00:27:23,757 you come over here, 707 00:27:23,757 --> 00:27:26,035 take out the old hard drive, 708 00:27:26,035 --> 00:27:28,282 put the new one in, 709 00:27:28,282 --> 00:27:29,615 and slide it in. 710 00:27:31,744 --> 00:27:32,914 - I can't see. 711 00:27:32,914 --> 00:27:35,971 Oh, all right, well, come over this way. 712 00:27:35,971 --> 00:27:38,971 (sensual music) 713 00:27:40,795 --> 00:27:44,400 - Yeah, so you, sorry, where was I? 714 00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,501 - Sliding it in. 715 00:27:46,501 --> 00:27:47,561 - What? 716 00:27:47,561 --> 00:27:49,506 - The hard drive. 717 00:27:49,506 --> 00:27:50,673 Oh, all right. 718 00:27:53,307 --> 00:27:54,793 I'm gonna go to the bathroom. 719 00:27:54,793 --> 00:27:57,376 (sensual music) 720 00:28:02,365 --> 00:28:03,428 - Frank, get off of him, dude. 721 00:28:03,428 --> 00:28:06,042 - Oh my God, I think my fucking spleen just ruptured. 722 00:28:06,042 --> 00:28:06,959 - Oh, baby. 723 00:28:08,079 --> 00:28:10,583 - Well, anyway I am getting the 'cuda back tomorrow. 724 00:28:10,583 --> 00:28:11,468 - No shit! 725 00:28:11,468 --> 00:28:12,301 - Yeah. - It's about time, man. 726 00:28:12,301 --> 00:28:13,134 - I know you're telling me, 727 00:28:13,134 --> 00:28:15,901 I'm about to be cruising like all day on Monday. 728 00:28:15,901 --> 00:28:17,012 - Wait, what's Monday? 729 00:28:17,012 --> 00:28:18,142 Is it Arbor day? 730 00:28:18,142 --> 00:28:20,007 - Monday, my friend is what in high school is referred 731 00:28:20,007 --> 00:28:21,817 to as a half day, 732 00:28:21,817 --> 00:28:23,040 so it'd be sacrilege not 733 00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:25,098 to take advantage of that, right? 734 00:28:25,098 --> 00:28:26,295 - What about the, 735 00:28:26,295 --> 00:28:27,692 what's her name, 736 00:28:27,692 --> 00:28:29,273 the new hottie at work? 737 00:28:29,273 --> 00:28:30,349 - Oh yeah, no, I don't know 738 00:28:30,349 --> 00:28:32,494 if that one's gonna work out this time. 739 00:28:32,494 --> 00:28:33,969 - It's never stopped you before. 740 00:28:33,969 --> 00:28:35,400 - Yeah, but I keep getting older, okay? 741 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,504 I'm gonna get caught pretty soon. 742 00:28:37,504 --> 00:28:38,646 - So don't do it. 743 00:28:38,646 --> 00:28:40,668 - Yeah, okay, you've obviously never seen 744 00:28:40,668 --> 00:28:41,857 this chick before, all right? 745 00:28:41,857 --> 00:28:44,151 You don't say no to a girl like this. 746 00:28:44,151 --> 00:28:45,651 - Ah, you don't. 747 00:28:45,651 --> 00:28:46,484 (John laughs) 748 00:28:46,484 --> 00:28:48,573 - All right, yeah, whatever, I don't. 749 00:28:48,573 --> 00:28:51,775 She's not like your average high school girl, you know? 750 00:28:51,775 --> 00:28:54,747 - What is she advanced? - Homeschooled? 751 00:28:54,747 --> 00:28:56,031 - No, she's in high school. 752 00:28:56,031 --> 00:28:57,531 I just mean she's, 753 00:28:58,469 --> 00:29:00,633 fuck, I don't know, she's different, all right? 754 00:29:00,633 --> 00:29:02,889 - But isn't that what you said about Sarah? 755 00:29:02,889 --> 00:29:04,274 - Yeah, I did say that about Sarah, 756 00:29:04,274 --> 00:29:07,637 but what I met with Sarah's a fucking psychopath, okay? 757 00:29:07,637 --> 00:29:09,656 - Didn't you date her for like six months? 758 00:29:09,656 --> 00:29:10,590 - Yeah. - Yeah, I did, 759 00:29:10,590 --> 00:29:12,831 and it was the worst six months of my life actually. 760 00:29:12,831 --> 00:29:14,113 It was the best sex though, 761 00:29:14,113 --> 00:29:16,852 so I guess in retrospect, it's kinda. 762 00:29:16,852 --> 00:29:19,077 - Whatever happened with that? 763 00:29:19,077 --> 00:29:20,101 - She turned 18. 764 00:29:20,101 --> 00:29:21,135 I had to cut her loose. 765 00:29:21,135 --> 00:29:23,324 - For Christ's sake, would you just snap the freaking ball? 766 00:29:23,324 --> 00:29:24,436 - All right. - Oh, somebody wants 767 00:29:24,436 --> 00:29:26,374 to get to get scored on. 768 00:29:26,374 --> 00:29:27,781 - Okay, okay, I'm coming for you. 769 00:29:27,781 --> 00:29:29,336 - Yeah. 770 00:29:29,336 --> 00:29:30,169 - Hut! 771 00:29:31,345 --> 00:29:32,511 Oh, there he is. 772 00:29:32,511 --> 00:29:34,099 Oh drop. 773 00:29:34,099 --> 00:29:35,269 - Through the trees! - Yes! 774 00:29:35,269 --> 00:29:36,630 - In your face, Bob. 775 00:29:36,630 --> 00:29:37,463 Touch down. 776 00:29:37,463 --> 00:29:38,723 - Still got it. 777 00:29:38,723 --> 00:29:40,352 Yeah, you saw that. 778 00:29:40,352 --> 00:29:42,935 (upbeat music) 779 00:29:44,014 --> 00:29:46,431 (indistinct) 780 00:29:48,749 --> 00:29:50,110 - [Professor] There will be previously seen 781 00:29:50,110 --> 00:29:52,309 in their individual elements 782 00:29:52,309 --> 00:29:56,559 which reaction means (indistinct). 783 00:29:57,989 --> 00:29:58,822 - John? 784 00:30:00,683 --> 00:30:02,600 - An answer Mr. Barden. 785 00:30:03,701 --> 00:30:04,534 - Seven. 786 00:30:05,460 --> 00:30:06,976 - Yeah, very good. 787 00:30:06,976 --> 00:30:10,546 In this way conversion of this group introduced is stable. 788 00:30:10,546 --> 00:30:14,296 (music drowns out professor) 789 00:30:23,883 --> 00:30:26,800 (triumphant music) 790 00:30:35,676 --> 00:30:38,676 (garage door opens) 791 00:30:46,438 --> 00:30:48,855 (door opens) 792 00:30:53,380 --> 00:30:54,213 - Is he here? 793 00:30:54,213 --> 00:30:55,217 - Yeah, yeah, he's upfront, 794 00:30:55,217 --> 00:30:56,749 and he didn't take his pills today. 795 00:30:56,749 --> 00:30:58,558 - Oh, this is gonna be so ripe. 796 00:30:58,558 --> 00:31:00,088 - Yeah, no shit, dude. 797 00:31:00,088 --> 00:31:01,588 Oh, here he comes. 798 00:31:04,889 --> 00:31:06,762 - Oh, good morning, class. 799 00:31:06,762 --> 00:31:10,650 - [All] Good morning Professor Robertson. 800 00:31:10,650 --> 00:31:11,483 - Yeah. 801 00:31:12,856 --> 00:31:17,316 Today, we needs to talk about the impact of marriage 802 00:31:17,316 --> 00:31:18,905 in our social system. 803 00:31:18,905 --> 00:31:20,959 Before we's get started, 804 00:31:20,959 --> 00:31:24,042 anyone have any questions or comments. 805 00:31:24,939 --> 00:31:26,106 - Yes, Daniel. 806 00:31:28,068 --> 00:31:31,118 - Sure, marriage is good. 807 00:31:32,983 --> 00:31:35,003 - Well, yes it is. 808 00:31:35,003 --> 00:31:37,805 Thank you for participating. 809 00:31:37,805 --> 00:31:41,544 Marriage is the coming of two people in a relationship 810 00:31:41,544 --> 00:31:42,706 in a social setting, 811 00:31:42,706 --> 00:31:45,584 or three or four people, depending on where you live, 812 00:31:45,584 --> 00:31:49,667 like if you live near Utah or something like that 813 00:31:50,854 --> 00:31:52,681 then it's a whole different story, 814 00:31:52,681 --> 00:31:55,424 but a whole lot more fun. 815 00:31:55,424 --> 00:31:56,674 Let me explain. 816 00:31:58,243 --> 00:32:01,910 Does anyone here know someone who's married? 817 00:32:03,577 --> 00:32:05,528 Good, good, good, good. 818 00:32:05,528 --> 00:32:06,706 See, in marriage though, 819 00:32:06,706 --> 00:32:08,447 you think you know what it's about, 820 00:32:08,447 --> 00:32:10,016 you do not. 821 00:32:10,016 --> 00:32:12,035 'Cause you see marriage, 822 00:32:12,035 --> 00:32:13,321 it's a scam. 823 00:32:13,321 --> 00:32:15,660 It's a scam from big business just to get people 824 00:32:15,660 --> 00:32:18,392 to start marriaging together. 825 00:32:18,392 --> 00:32:20,288 It's really to get people to spend money. 826 00:32:20,288 --> 00:32:21,315 It's a commercial thing. 827 00:32:21,315 --> 00:32:25,565 It really example, again, i.e. dot, dot, dot, colon. 828 00:32:26,776 --> 00:32:27,998 You would buy a towel, 829 00:32:27,998 --> 00:32:29,338 then you'd buy towels, 830 00:32:29,338 --> 00:32:31,694 and now you buy his and hers towels, 831 00:32:31,694 --> 00:32:33,130 so that you've got to spend more money, 832 00:32:33,130 --> 00:32:35,277 and then it just gets a little bit crazy, doesn't it? 833 00:32:35,277 --> 00:32:36,530 I think it does, 834 00:32:36,530 --> 00:32:37,780 It really does. 835 00:32:39,886 --> 00:32:44,303 - Another thing, who here has ever seen a phone book? 836 00:32:45,852 --> 00:32:46,990 Okay, all right. 837 00:32:46,990 --> 00:32:49,866 Now in the phone book, you'll notice 838 00:32:49,866 --> 00:32:51,085 that you've got like Smith, 839 00:32:51,085 --> 00:32:52,508 and the names in the phone book, 840 00:32:52,508 --> 00:32:53,455 all different kinds of names, 841 00:32:53,455 --> 00:32:54,288 and it's Smith, 842 00:32:54,288 --> 00:32:55,121 and then you'd get Jones, 843 00:32:55,121 --> 00:32:56,411 and of course not on the same page, 844 00:32:56,411 --> 00:32:59,014 'cause that would either be a very, very small town 845 00:32:59,014 --> 00:33:00,120 which isn't a bad thing, 846 00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:01,639 'cause I miss mine. 847 00:33:01,639 --> 00:33:04,098 But also you think about it, 848 00:33:04,098 --> 00:33:05,687 and it would be Smith Jones, 849 00:33:05,687 --> 00:33:09,556 and then they would have a hyphen Smith-Jones, 850 00:33:09,556 --> 00:33:11,401 'cause people get married and wanna keep their names, 851 00:33:11,401 --> 00:33:13,039 but then it's just one name, 852 00:33:13,039 --> 00:33:14,947 and then it just goes by Jones. 853 00:33:14,947 --> 00:33:15,780 You see what I'm, 854 00:33:15,780 --> 00:33:18,613 do you understand what I'm saying? 855 00:33:20,152 --> 00:33:22,735 Does anyone have any questions? 856 00:33:23,906 --> 00:33:25,878 - Gregory, yes. 857 00:33:25,878 --> 00:33:27,363 - I'm not in this class. 858 00:33:27,363 --> 00:33:28,446 - You is now. 859 00:33:29,849 --> 00:33:32,106 - I have an unrelated question. 860 00:33:32,106 --> 00:33:34,390 - There is no unrelated questions 861 00:33:34,390 --> 00:33:36,726 when it comes to sociology. 862 00:33:36,726 --> 00:33:39,404 - Fantastic, 'cause I was wondering 863 00:33:39,404 --> 00:33:41,873 what the fuck is wrong with you? 864 00:33:41,873 --> 00:33:45,459 Do you have any idea what you're talking about? 865 00:33:45,459 --> 00:33:48,671 - That would really be two questions. 866 00:33:48,671 --> 00:33:50,852 - Okay, hello people, 867 00:33:50,852 --> 00:33:52,965 are you buying this bullshit? 868 00:33:52,965 --> 00:33:56,445 Go home, watch cartoons or something, 869 00:33:56,445 --> 00:33:57,832 anything but this. 870 00:33:57,832 --> 00:33:58,665 Jesus! 871 00:34:00,779 --> 00:34:03,196 (door opens) 872 00:34:04,126 --> 00:34:08,501 - And that class is why some people will never get married, 873 00:34:08,501 --> 00:34:10,053 'cause it's an anger issue. 874 00:34:10,053 --> 00:34:11,825 It's an anger issue. 875 00:34:11,825 --> 00:34:13,148 It is a bad thing. 876 00:34:13,148 --> 00:34:15,233 Does anyone else have any other questions? 877 00:34:15,233 --> 00:34:17,302 (upbeat music) 878 00:34:17,302 --> 00:34:18,135 - I don't know, 879 00:34:18,135 --> 00:34:19,509 it was just kinda sad really. 880 00:34:19,509 --> 00:34:20,775 - Robertson just like brushed it off. 881 00:34:20,775 --> 00:34:22,171 He probably didn't even hear it. 882 00:34:22,171 --> 00:34:25,038 - Yeah, I guess it helps to be off planet anyways. 883 00:34:25,038 --> 00:34:26,893 - I wonder what it's like to be off planet. 884 00:34:26,893 --> 00:34:28,879 - I always thought it would be like "Star Wars?" 885 00:34:28,879 --> 00:34:30,231 But that takes place in the past, so- 886 00:34:30,231 --> 00:34:31,651 - As long as it's not like Aliens 887 00:34:31,651 --> 00:34:32,720 that's all I care about. 888 00:34:32,720 --> 00:34:34,125 (upbeat music) 889 00:34:34,125 --> 00:34:35,640 So you and new girl going out tonight? 890 00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:37,195 - Yeah, second date. 891 00:34:37,195 --> 00:34:38,558 I better get a piece of ass this time, man. 892 00:34:38,558 --> 00:34:41,135 She's such a goddamn cock tease. 893 00:34:41,135 --> 00:34:43,743 - Whoa, okay, maybe she's just a virgin though. 894 00:34:43,743 --> 00:34:44,606 - No, there's no way, 895 00:34:44,606 --> 00:34:46,649 she's way too hot for that. 896 00:34:46,649 --> 00:34:48,317 Besides I swore off virgins. 897 00:34:48,317 --> 00:34:50,209 - It seems awfully out of character for you. 898 00:34:50,209 --> 00:34:51,042 - No, no, no, no, no, 899 00:34:51,042 --> 00:34:53,332 look there's like an associated smell 900 00:34:53,332 --> 00:34:55,556 with the taking of a girl's virginity. 901 00:34:55,556 --> 00:34:57,912 Yeah, it's disgusting you can't get it out of the car. 902 00:34:57,912 --> 00:34:59,927 I'm not putting the 'cuda through that shit again. 903 00:34:59,927 --> 00:35:01,609 - That's messed up dude. 904 00:35:01,609 --> 00:35:02,791 - Anyways I have a new rule about that, 905 00:35:02,791 --> 00:35:04,607 I wait for somebody else to break them in first, 906 00:35:04,607 --> 00:35:08,023 you know, a boyfriend, uncle, whenever. 907 00:35:08,023 --> 00:35:09,345 - You got fucking problems, man. 908 00:35:09,345 --> 00:35:10,595 - Yes, I do. 909 00:35:10,595 --> 00:35:12,211 - So what are you coming over? 910 00:35:12,211 --> 00:35:13,281 - Yeah, where else would I go? 911 00:35:13,281 --> 00:35:16,011 - I don't know, home, library, playground. 912 00:35:16,011 --> 00:35:18,441 We all know how Steve likes the playgrounds. 913 00:35:18,441 --> 00:35:21,024 (upbeat music) 914 00:35:25,870 --> 00:35:28,703 (car engine revs) 915 00:35:45,334 --> 00:35:48,334 (sensual music) 916 00:36:04,859 --> 00:36:06,367 (van engine revs) 917 00:36:06,367 --> 00:36:08,950 (upbeat music) 918 00:37:12,325 --> 00:37:14,085 - And I totally didn't expect this to happen, 919 00:37:14,085 --> 00:37:17,335 I mean, he's still married to his wife. 920 00:37:18,557 --> 00:37:20,343 She just thinks that he's gonna like leave his family 921 00:37:20,343 --> 00:37:22,176 and run away with her. 922 00:37:23,399 --> 00:37:25,092 How do I even spin that? 923 00:37:25,092 --> 00:37:26,649 - It's gotta be tough. 924 00:37:26,649 --> 00:37:28,321 Girls who go for older guys, 925 00:37:28,321 --> 00:37:30,121 they don't like to come back. 926 00:37:30,121 --> 00:37:32,918 - What exactly do you wanna do here? 927 00:37:32,918 --> 00:37:34,995 - I just want them out of the way out of the way. 928 00:37:34,995 --> 00:37:38,247 - Out of the way or out of the way? 929 00:37:38,247 --> 00:37:41,335 - Come on, man, we don't have to kill him. 930 00:37:41,335 --> 00:37:42,619 Do we? 931 00:37:42,619 --> 00:37:43,452 - No. 932 00:37:44,658 --> 00:37:47,801 No, no, you bunch of idiots, no, okay, 933 00:37:47,801 --> 00:37:49,893 but he is pissing me off, all right? 934 00:37:49,893 --> 00:37:51,317 I mean, he's just using her, 935 00:37:51,317 --> 00:37:53,661 and she just has no idea. 936 00:37:53,661 --> 00:37:54,494 - We could scare him off, 937 00:37:54,494 --> 00:37:56,337 rough him up a little bit. 938 00:37:56,337 --> 00:37:57,815 - Yeah, but then what if it doesn't hold, 939 00:37:57,815 --> 00:38:00,026 and he sticks around anyway. 940 00:38:00,026 --> 00:38:02,071 - Could rough her up a little bit. 941 00:38:02,071 --> 00:38:03,560 - No. 942 00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:05,229 - We can take pictures of him with a chick. 943 00:38:05,229 --> 00:38:06,062 - With Nichole. 944 00:38:06,062 --> 00:38:07,725 - Yeah, and then send to his wife, 945 00:38:07,725 --> 00:38:09,259 and then he has to choose upfront. 946 00:38:09,259 --> 00:38:10,655 - Yeah, but then when if he chooses Nichole, 947 00:38:10,655 --> 00:38:13,970 and I'm even more screwed than I was at first. 948 00:38:13,970 --> 00:38:17,810 - Okay, okay, so find some ho-bag, 949 00:38:17,810 --> 00:38:20,558 you know, some other chick to sleep with him. 950 00:38:20,558 --> 00:38:23,000 - You're telling me that you're planning to get me laid is 951 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:26,953 to hire some whore to have sex with somebody else. 952 00:38:26,953 --> 00:38:28,009 - Yes. 953 00:38:28,009 --> 00:38:29,787 - Not your best plan. 954 00:38:29,787 --> 00:38:31,309 - Man, forget all that. 955 00:38:31,309 --> 00:38:34,191 This type of guy is probably a real scumbag already. 956 00:38:34,191 --> 00:38:35,042 Nichole is a bright girl, 957 00:38:35,042 --> 00:38:36,635 she'll come around eventually. 958 00:38:36,635 --> 00:38:38,250 - So what, like I just do nothing? 959 00:38:38,250 --> 00:38:40,808 - No, no, no, keep going after her, 960 00:38:40,808 --> 00:38:43,017 but there's no reason to cock block this guy, 961 00:38:43,017 --> 00:38:45,439 he'll end up fucking himself eventually. 962 00:38:45,439 --> 00:38:46,272 - I don't know, man, 963 00:38:46,272 --> 00:38:48,798 it just doesn't seem like enough, you know? 964 00:38:48,798 --> 00:38:51,439 - Okay, well, what other choice do you have? 965 00:38:51,439 --> 00:38:53,176 - None, okay, none, fine. 966 00:38:53,176 --> 00:38:54,481 Fuck you guys, okay. 967 00:38:54,481 --> 00:38:56,695 Are you guys coming over or what? 968 00:38:56,695 --> 00:38:57,832 - Is your mom gonna be there? 969 00:38:57,832 --> 00:38:59,330 - No, she's been gone all summer, man, 970 00:38:59,330 --> 00:39:01,389 but she made lasagna, 971 00:39:01,389 --> 00:39:02,442 four months ago, 972 00:39:02,442 --> 00:39:03,275 it's in the freezer, 973 00:39:03,275 --> 00:39:04,770 and I'ma heat that shit up. 974 00:39:04,770 --> 00:39:05,833 - [Frank] Still good. 975 00:39:05,833 --> 00:39:08,416 (upbeat music) 976 00:39:15,591 --> 00:39:16,758 - Hello? - Hey. 977 00:39:17,653 --> 00:39:20,183 - Who's this? - It's John. 978 00:39:20,183 --> 00:39:23,358 You told me to call. - Oh, hi. 979 00:39:25,811 --> 00:39:26,851 - Something wrong? 980 00:39:26,851 --> 00:39:29,516 You were supposed to go to New York this weekend, right? 981 00:39:29,516 --> 00:39:33,080 - [Nichole] Nigel says he's too busy to see me, prick. 982 00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:36,715 I think he's seeing his wife behind my back. 983 00:39:36,715 --> 00:39:38,132 - That's too bad. 984 00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:41,730 - [Nichole] We should get together. 985 00:39:41,730 --> 00:39:43,664 Dinner this weekend? 986 00:39:43,664 --> 00:39:46,583 - Yeah, sure. - Sounds great. 987 00:39:46,583 --> 00:39:47,930 Make some plans and call me. 988 00:39:47,930 --> 00:39:48,791 - Yeah, for sure. 989 00:39:48,791 --> 00:39:49,624 I will do. 990 00:39:50,824 --> 00:39:54,278 (John chuckles) 991 00:39:54,278 --> 00:39:55,528 Woo, all right! 992 00:40:00,201 --> 00:40:01,644 - [Steve] How was your call? 993 00:40:01,644 --> 00:40:03,905 - Going out with Nichole this weekend. 994 00:40:03,905 --> 00:40:06,966 Dinner. - Nice man, good luck. 995 00:40:06,966 --> 00:40:09,700 - You're pissing in your own face, man. 996 00:40:09,700 --> 00:40:11,787 - What about the fiancé? 997 00:40:11,787 --> 00:40:14,414 - Still with his wife. 998 00:40:14,414 --> 00:40:16,003 - Good, very stable. 999 00:40:16,003 --> 00:40:18,760 - Look who is talking, man. 1000 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:21,563 - That actually reminds me, ah, (blows raspberries). 1001 00:40:21,563 --> 00:40:22,620 (Frank and Bob laugh) 1002 00:40:22,620 --> 00:40:23,942 - [John] Shut up. 1003 00:40:23,942 --> 00:40:26,359 (upbeat music) 1004 00:40:28,319 --> 00:40:29,786 - I gotta manscape. 1005 00:40:29,786 --> 00:40:31,092 Got a date later. 1006 00:40:31,092 --> 00:40:32,746 - Yeah, what's his name? 1007 00:40:32,746 --> 00:40:33,579 - Lucy. 1008 00:40:34,959 --> 00:40:36,865 - Isn't that your mom's name? 1009 00:40:36,865 --> 00:40:38,404 - It's okay, my mom's not in high school. 1010 00:40:38,404 --> 00:40:40,554 (John laughs) 1011 00:40:40,554 --> 00:40:41,605 - That's really fucking funny, dude. 1012 00:40:41,605 --> 00:40:44,022 (all laugh) 1013 00:40:46,923 --> 00:40:49,340 (beer pours) 1014 00:40:52,263 --> 00:40:55,118 - Wow, there's my little heartbreaker. 1015 00:40:55,118 --> 00:40:58,728 Hey, come on and give your uncle a little kiss now, come on. 1016 00:40:58,728 --> 00:40:59,736 (Zeke and Shelly laughing) 1017 00:40:59,736 --> 00:41:02,404 - Uncle Zeke, I just put my lips on. 1018 00:41:02,404 --> 00:41:03,539 - Cindy Starlight Pressman, 1019 00:41:03,539 --> 00:41:05,644 don't you dare sass your uncle. 1020 00:41:05,644 --> 00:41:06,955 - Sorry, aunt Shelly. 1021 00:41:06,955 --> 00:41:08,196 - Are you having some dinner, 1022 00:41:08,196 --> 00:41:09,877 or are you still watching your figure? 1023 00:41:09,877 --> 00:41:12,710 - I'll watch your figure for you. 1024 00:41:12,710 --> 00:41:14,232 - Nothing for me, thanks. 1025 00:41:14,232 --> 00:41:15,805 I'm going out with Steve tonight. 1026 00:41:15,805 --> 00:41:18,697 - Oh yeah, I don't know what I think 1027 00:41:18,697 --> 00:41:20,628 about this Steve character, huh? 1028 00:41:20,628 --> 00:41:23,174 What are you working in that flicker shack for, huh anyway? 1029 00:41:23,174 --> 00:41:24,412 You smell like popcorn, 1030 00:41:24,412 --> 00:41:26,210 and you're hardly making anything. 1031 00:41:26,210 --> 00:41:27,043 I told you, 1032 00:41:27,043 --> 00:41:28,417 you want to make some real money 1033 00:41:28,417 --> 00:41:30,681 you gotta go down there and audition for the Kat. 1034 00:41:30,681 --> 00:41:33,479 - Mm-mh, now Zeke, that place closed down last year. 1035 00:41:33,479 --> 00:41:34,312 - Oh what? 1036 00:41:34,312 --> 00:41:35,434 Oh shit! - Yeah, I know. 1037 00:41:35,434 --> 00:41:37,932 - That's where me and our aunt Shelly met. 1038 00:41:37,932 --> 00:41:39,765 She was B squad, 1039 00:41:39,765 --> 00:41:41,437 but I'll tell you she would have been center stage 1040 00:41:41,437 --> 00:41:44,692 Friday night had I not come along and snatched her up. 1041 00:41:44,692 --> 00:41:45,938 - That was by the good old days. 1042 00:41:45,938 --> 00:41:47,253 - Yes, one of the good old days. 1043 00:41:47,253 --> 00:41:49,531 - But that's not for Cindy, mm-mh, 1044 00:41:49,531 --> 00:41:52,693 Cindy is doing just fine, aren't you sweetie? 1045 00:41:52,693 --> 00:41:53,545 - Steve's here. 1046 00:41:53,545 --> 00:41:54,378 (car honking) 1047 00:41:54,378 --> 00:41:56,963 - All right, honey, have a good time. 1048 00:41:56,963 --> 00:41:57,796 - Steve's here. 1049 00:41:57,796 --> 00:42:01,278 - Oh no, no, don't worry about it. 1050 00:42:01,278 --> 00:42:02,503 Come on. - Steve. 1051 00:42:02,503 --> 00:42:05,856 I know I'll give you something to fill your hands with. 1052 00:42:05,856 --> 00:42:08,611 Come on, come on, let's go, naughty boy. 1053 00:42:08,611 --> 00:42:11,795 - Play hide the beer can. - Yeah. (laughs) 1054 00:42:23,679 --> 00:42:25,281 - Hey, cut it out. 1055 00:42:25,281 --> 00:42:26,114 - What? 1056 00:42:27,399 --> 00:42:29,823 - Come on, I'm just not ready yet. 1057 00:42:29,823 --> 00:42:31,370 - Have another beer then. 1058 00:42:31,370 --> 00:42:33,120 - I'm serious. 1059 00:42:33,120 --> 00:42:34,970 Besides I have to sober up by curfew. 1060 00:42:34,970 --> 00:42:39,272 Aunt Shelly will smell my breath and spank me again. 1061 00:42:39,272 --> 00:42:42,987 Have you thought anymore about home coming? 1062 00:42:42,987 --> 00:42:45,017 - Yeah, I thought about it. 1063 00:42:45,017 --> 00:42:45,850 - And? 1064 00:42:48,377 --> 00:42:49,210 - I don't know, 1065 00:42:49,210 --> 00:42:51,034 I need more time, all right? 1066 00:42:51,034 --> 00:42:52,712 - But there's this other guy who just asking me, 1067 00:42:52,712 --> 00:42:55,225 and I can't keep stalling. 1068 00:42:55,225 --> 00:42:57,716 - So go with him then. 1069 00:42:57,716 --> 00:42:58,976 - I don't want to go with him, 1070 00:42:58,976 --> 00:43:00,855 he's in my grade. 1071 00:43:00,855 --> 00:43:02,413 - Did you tell him that? 1072 00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:04,371 - No, I told him I wanna go with you, 1073 00:43:04,371 --> 00:43:05,875 but that you hadn't decided yet, 1074 00:43:05,875 --> 00:43:08,260 so he'll just have to wait. 1075 00:43:08,260 --> 00:43:09,985 - Okay, so let me get this straight. 1076 00:43:09,985 --> 00:43:13,401 You've just got this kid on hold. 1077 00:43:13,401 --> 00:43:14,234 - Kind of. 1078 00:43:16,383 --> 00:43:17,411 (Steve Chuckles) 1079 00:43:17,411 --> 00:43:18,244 - What? 1080 00:43:20,550 --> 00:43:24,115 - No, nothing, nothing come here. 1081 00:43:24,115 --> 00:43:26,698 (upbeat music) 1082 00:43:30,851 --> 00:43:32,724 - [Bob] What do you mean you haven't done her yet? 1083 00:43:32,724 --> 00:43:33,918 - She's in high school, man. 1084 00:43:33,918 --> 00:43:36,585 She's doesn't even have a car for Christ sake. 1085 00:43:36,585 --> 00:43:38,351 - So get behind her, grab her arms, 1086 00:43:38,351 --> 00:43:39,830 and ride her like a bicycle. 1087 00:43:39,830 --> 00:43:41,419 - Yeah, I don't think her mom would appreciate 1088 00:43:41,419 --> 00:43:42,367 that very much. 1089 00:43:42,367 --> 00:43:43,571 - Is her mom hot? 1090 00:43:43,571 --> 00:43:46,573 - Probably, but she's gotta be at least 30. 1091 00:43:46,573 --> 00:43:47,928 - You know what you should do? 1092 00:43:47,928 --> 00:43:49,785 Go to her house when her mom's there, 1093 00:43:49,785 --> 00:43:50,935 get behind her like- 1094 00:43:50,935 --> 00:43:52,419 - What's up, man? 1095 00:43:52,419 --> 00:43:54,947 - I'm just killing time before work. 1096 00:43:54,947 --> 00:43:56,019 - All right, well, I will be 1097 00:43:56,019 --> 00:43:57,899 in my room exercising my God given rights 1098 00:43:57,899 --> 00:44:00,710 to watch free porn and rub one out, so. 1099 00:44:00,710 --> 00:44:02,099 - So think of me. 1100 00:44:02,099 --> 00:44:04,491 - Always do. But you guys, okay? 1101 00:44:05,639 --> 00:44:07,582 I don't want you down here playing games all day 1102 00:44:07,582 --> 00:44:09,231 in my parents' basement, okay. 1103 00:44:09,231 --> 00:44:11,527 Robert, take out the trash, 1104 00:44:11,527 --> 00:44:13,626 and Franklin, so help me God, 1105 00:44:13,626 --> 00:44:16,513 if I have to ask you to mow the lawn one more time, 1106 00:44:16,513 --> 00:44:18,207 no more games, that's it. 1107 00:44:18,207 --> 00:44:20,261 - But I hate chores. 1108 00:44:20,261 --> 00:44:22,568 - That's enough out of both of you, okay? 1109 00:44:22,568 --> 00:44:24,651 - You know where I'll be. 1110 00:44:29,332 --> 00:44:30,183 - Have fun, boys. 1111 00:44:30,183 --> 00:44:31,016 (happy music) 1112 00:44:31,016 --> 00:44:31,849 - Yeah. 1113 00:44:35,554 --> 00:44:37,886 (sensual music) 1114 00:44:41,169 --> 00:44:42,337 - There you are. 1115 00:44:42,337 --> 00:44:44,179 I've been looking all over for you. 1116 00:44:44,179 --> 00:44:46,041 - I've been right here. 1117 00:44:46,041 --> 00:44:47,395 - So I see. 1118 00:44:47,395 --> 00:44:48,408 I got your message, 1119 00:44:48,408 --> 00:44:49,241 what's up? 1120 00:44:50,834 --> 00:44:54,042 - So I've decided I'm gonna go. 1121 00:44:54,042 --> 00:44:55,106 - Oh Steve. 1122 00:44:55,106 --> 00:44:56,785 - Yeah, okay, well I'm telling you right now. 1123 00:44:56,785 --> 00:44:58,296 I'm not going to like it, 1124 00:44:58,296 --> 00:44:59,905 but ii will do it for you. 1125 00:44:59,905 --> 00:45:01,135 - This is gonna be so great. 1126 00:45:01,135 --> 00:45:03,036 My friend, Sandy, she's going with her boyfriend, Richard, 1127 00:45:03,036 --> 00:45:04,102 if we can totally double. 1128 00:45:04,102 --> 00:45:05,726 - No, no, no, no, no, no doubles, 1129 00:45:05,726 --> 00:45:08,230 no dinners, just me and you, okay, 1130 00:45:08,230 --> 00:45:09,922 and we're not staying long. 1131 00:45:09,922 --> 00:45:12,689 - All right, but we are going? 1132 00:45:12,689 --> 00:45:15,326 - Yes Cindy, we are going to homecoming. 1133 00:45:15,326 --> 00:45:17,034 (sensual music) 1134 00:45:17,034 --> 00:45:18,200 - This is gonna be so great. 1135 00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:20,281 - Yeah. - I gotta get back downstairs. 1136 00:45:20,281 --> 00:45:21,114 - Okay. 1137 00:45:21,114 --> 00:45:23,697 (sensual music) 1138 00:45:24,734 --> 00:45:25,567 Fuck! 1139 00:45:28,856 --> 00:45:29,689 - It's tough. 1140 00:45:29,689 --> 00:45:32,631 I mean, I know there's a place for me at the university 1141 00:45:32,631 --> 00:45:33,464 when I graduate, 1142 00:45:33,464 --> 00:45:34,690 but the pay is not very good. 1143 00:45:34,690 --> 00:45:36,293 And then if I accept a position somewhere else, 1144 00:45:36,293 --> 00:45:38,215 that doesn't leave any room for Nigel. 1145 00:45:38,215 --> 00:45:39,898 He's tenure, so he can't just leave. 1146 00:45:39,898 --> 00:45:41,657 - I don't know about this Nigel guy, 1147 00:45:41,657 --> 00:45:43,659 he just seems like a real douche. 1148 00:45:43,659 --> 00:45:46,098 - (chuckles) Okay. 1149 00:45:46,098 --> 00:45:48,001 He's been a real asshole lately. 1150 00:45:48,001 --> 00:45:50,573 Some guys never grow up. - I grew up. 1151 00:45:50,573 --> 00:45:52,533 - Sure you did. - I did. 1152 00:45:52,533 --> 00:45:54,682 - Do you think Boba Fett could take on the Terminator? 1153 00:45:54,682 --> 00:45:55,750 - Oh my God, in a heartbeat. 1154 00:45:55,750 --> 00:45:57,542 I mean Boba Fett's a bounty hunter. 1155 00:45:57,542 --> 00:46:00,446 Terminator would have no idea what hit him. 1156 00:46:00,446 --> 00:46:02,081 - Real mature. - Oh, okay. 1157 00:46:02,081 --> 00:46:03,714 - We've been talking about me all night though, 1158 00:46:03,714 --> 00:46:04,894 what about you? 1159 00:46:04,894 --> 00:46:06,130 Are you seeing anyone? 1160 00:46:06,130 --> 00:46:07,878 - More like romantically? 1161 00:46:07,878 --> 00:46:09,968 - Yeah, anyone I'd know? 1162 00:46:09,968 --> 00:46:13,539 - Oh, no, I've been kind of more taking a break 1163 00:46:13,539 --> 00:46:15,110 from the whole dating game. 1164 00:46:15,110 --> 00:46:18,238 I'm trying to like figure some things out. 1165 00:46:18,238 --> 00:46:20,723 - That's good for you. 1166 00:46:20,723 --> 00:46:23,044 How much time have you taken? 1167 00:46:23,044 --> 00:46:25,287 - Well, like five or six- 1168 00:46:25,287 --> 00:46:26,909 - Weeks? 1169 00:46:26,909 --> 00:46:27,742 - Years. 1170 00:46:28,875 --> 00:46:30,926 - John, that's more than a little bit of time. 1171 00:46:30,926 --> 00:46:31,907 - I know. 1172 00:46:31,907 --> 00:46:34,319 - That's since we broke up. 1173 00:46:34,319 --> 00:46:37,694 Have you not dated anyone since we broke up? 1174 00:46:37,694 --> 00:46:39,145 - I dated a little bit, 1175 00:46:39,145 --> 00:46:42,062 like right after, but I don't know. 1176 00:46:42,937 --> 00:46:44,063 Okay, oh, okay, 1177 00:46:44,063 --> 00:46:46,227 so I like walnuts. 1178 00:46:46,227 --> 00:46:50,115 I'm not really a Chex Mix kinda guy. 1179 00:46:50,115 --> 00:46:50,977 - What? 1180 00:46:50,977 --> 00:46:53,455 - Okay, so Steve, he likes Chex Mix. 1181 00:46:53,455 --> 00:46:55,058 He likes the variety. 1182 00:46:55,058 --> 00:46:57,216 He likes to really dig in there, 1183 00:46:57,216 --> 00:47:00,555 and shove as much shit into his face as he possibly can 1184 00:47:00,555 --> 00:47:02,977 where I like walnuts. 1185 00:47:02,977 --> 00:47:07,278 I like to really take my time to crack into the- 1186 00:47:07,278 --> 00:47:09,156 - This is a terrible analogy. - It's not great. 1187 00:47:09,156 --> 00:47:10,323 It's not good. 1188 00:47:11,932 --> 00:47:14,659 I guess what I'm trying to say is you ruined me 1189 00:47:14,659 --> 00:47:15,655 for other women. 1190 00:47:15,655 --> 00:47:17,832 - Oh, because I'm a nut. 1191 00:47:17,832 --> 00:47:18,818 - Oh, that was bad, 1192 00:47:18,818 --> 00:47:19,908 that was not good. 1193 00:47:19,908 --> 00:47:21,066 - We should probably get going. 1194 00:47:21,066 --> 00:47:23,069 - Yeah, where's this waiter been? 1195 00:47:23,069 --> 00:47:24,652 I don't know where. 1196 00:47:25,833 --> 00:47:28,641 - So what time did you even get back last night? 1197 00:47:28,641 --> 00:47:32,724 - 9:30, and I got a good night kiss. 1198 00:47:35,208 --> 00:47:36,101 Okay, it was on the cheek, 1199 00:47:36,101 --> 00:47:37,915 but it was close to the lips, 1200 00:47:37,915 --> 00:47:38,748 and I paid for dinner, 1201 00:47:38,748 --> 00:47:41,178 so that's gotta mean something, right? 1202 00:47:41,178 --> 00:47:43,764 - It means you are out 50 bucks. 1203 00:47:43,764 --> 00:47:44,597 - Okay. 1204 00:47:44,597 --> 00:47:46,059 - Look, man, if you're not gonna be down 1205 00:47:46,059 --> 00:47:47,508 below fighting for scraps, 1206 00:47:47,508 --> 00:47:48,459 like the rest of us, 1207 00:47:48,459 --> 00:47:50,934 you need to swim your ass to the surface, 1208 00:47:50,934 --> 00:47:54,101 and tickle the little man in the boat. 1209 00:47:56,511 --> 00:47:58,205 Oh, I decided I'm going to homecoming. 1210 00:47:58,205 --> 00:47:59,038 - What? 1211 00:47:59,038 --> 00:47:59,871 No shit, dude. 1212 00:47:59,871 --> 00:48:01,403 You've gotta be fucking shitting me. 1213 00:48:01,403 --> 00:48:02,736 There is no way. 1214 00:48:03,590 --> 00:48:05,236 - I figured if she's gonna put out, you know, 1215 00:48:05,236 --> 00:48:06,843 this'll be the night 1216 00:48:06,843 --> 00:48:08,854 - God, you are gonna humiliate yourself in front 1217 00:48:08,854 --> 00:48:11,510 of an entire high school just to get this girl in bed, 1218 00:48:11,510 --> 00:48:12,622 are you kidding? 1219 00:48:12,622 --> 00:48:14,833 Why don't you graduate to real women, dude? 1220 00:48:14,833 --> 00:48:16,930 - 'Cause let me tell you something about real women. 1221 00:48:16,930 --> 00:48:17,763 - Please. 1222 00:48:17,763 --> 00:48:19,376 - They don't date guys like us, all right? 1223 00:48:19,376 --> 00:48:20,556 We're on the level. 1224 00:48:20,556 --> 00:48:22,263 Okay, we don't hide our demands, 1225 00:48:22,263 --> 00:48:25,546 and we don't try to put on a show, 1226 00:48:26,396 --> 00:48:28,532 or they don't want what we have to offer, okay. 1227 00:48:28,532 --> 00:48:29,936 They don't want love. 1228 00:48:29,936 --> 00:48:31,204 They're not looking for sex. 1229 00:48:31,204 --> 00:48:34,161 They're looking for a lifestyle, all right? 1230 00:48:34,161 --> 00:48:35,575 "What kind of car does he drive? 1231 00:48:35,575 --> 00:48:36,513 Is he rich?" 1232 00:48:36,513 --> 00:48:37,723 It's fucking vicious. 1233 00:48:37,723 --> 00:48:38,687 (John laughs) 1234 00:48:38,687 --> 00:48:40,476 Every hot girl that we knew in high school 1235 00:48:40,476 --> 00:48:42,453 was always dating a college guy, right? 1236 00:48:42,453 --> 00:48:43,916 - Yeah. - They shopped up, 1237 00:48:43,916 --> 00:48:46,493 that always left guys like me and you stuck somewhere 1238 00:48:46,493 --> 00:48:48,722 in between the fat chicks and the freaks. 1239 00:48:48,722 --> 00:48:50,164 - Fat chicks, oh... 1240 00:48:50,164 --> 00:48:52,312 - Dating isn't something that's meant to be enjoyed, man. 1241 00:48:52,312 --> 00:48:54,153 It's an emotional trash compactor 1242 00:48:54,153 --> 00:48:56,052 that's half filled with broken wills, 1243 00:48:56,052 --> 00:48:58,546 and it's topped off with rejection. 1244 00:48:58,546 --> 00:48:59,701 - Okay. 1245 00:48:59,701 --> 00:49:02,915 - But the game can be played both ways, right? 1246 00:49:02,915 --> 00:49:04,466 I can shop down, 1247 00:49:04,466 --> 00:49:06,565 because I am the college guy now. 1248 00:49:06,565 --> 00:49:07,832 This is my time. 1249 00:49:07,832 --> 00:49:10,432 I get to take my pick. 1250 00:49:10,432 --> 00:49:12,767 These high school girls who wouldn't piss on me, 1251 00:49:12,767 --> 00:49:14,855 if I was on fire? 1252 00:49:14,855 --> 00:49:17,650 Now I'm exactly what they're looking for, 1253 00:49:17,650 --> 00:49:19,990 and all of those guys who used to be us, 1254 00:49:19,990 --> 00:49:21,407 those loser guys, 1255 00:49:22,369 --> 00:49:23,202 they don't know it, 1256 00:49:23,202 --> 00:49:24,916 but I'm doing it for them, all right? 1257 00:49:24,916 --> 00:49:29,278 I fuck each and every one of those girls for those guys 1258 00:49:29,278 --> 00:49:31,121 who couldn't get a date on a Friday night. 1259 00:49:31,121 --> 00:49:32,705 - Wow! - And it feels good. 1260 00:49:32,705 --> 00:49:33,922 - Well, I'm sure. 1261 00:49:33,922 --> 00:49:35,814 And that's so very noble of you. 1262 00:49:35,814 --> 00:49:37,249 Oh, the King coming down from the castle 1263 00:49:37,249 --> 00:49:38,805 to feed the peasants. 1264 00:49:38,805 --> 00:49:39,882 You're basically a bottom feeder, 1265 00:49:39,882 --> 00:49:41,216 and you know it. 1266 00:49:41,216 --> 00:49:42,574 - I'm a what? - Bottom feeder, you know, 1267 00:49:42,574 --> 00:49:45,486 you're just strolling along the bottom of the ocean 1268 00:49:45,486 --> 00:49:47,704 just picking up whatever garbage you wanna put 1269 00:49:47,704 --> 00:49:48,537 in your mouth, 1270 00:49:48,537 --> 00:49:52,608 just way too lazy to even just go up and get real food. 1271 00:49:52,608 --> 00:49:54,966 - Okay, yeah, so I'm eating off the bottom, 1272 00:49:54,966 --> 00:49:57,193 I admit it. 1273 00:49:57,193 --> 00:49:59,466 This is a system that's been in place for generations. 1274 00:49:59,466 --> 00:50:00,687 The women invented it. 1275 00:50:00,687 --> 00:50:03,591 We just need to learn how to play along. 1276 00:50:03,591 --> 00:50:06,051 Nichole's professor, what's his fucking name? 1277 00:50:06,051 --> 00:50:06,884 - Nigel. 1278 00:50:06,884 --> 00:50:07,830 - Yeah, Nigel. - Yeah. 1279 00:50:07,830 --> 00:50:09,001 - Bottom feeder. 1280 00:50:09,001 --> 00:50:09,834 Extra slimy. 1281 00:50:09,834 --> 00:50:10,667 - Oh yeah. 1282 00:50:10,667 --> 00:50:12,801 And you need to be twice the fish that he is, 1283 00:50:12,801 --> 00:50:14,431 if you wanna win her back, 1284 00:50:14,431 --> 00:50:16,226 that's a lot of work, man. 1285 00:50:16,226 --> 00:50:17,809 And say you put in all that work, 1286 00:50:17,809 --> 00:50:19,796 and you don't get anything, 1287 00:50:19,796 --> 00:50:23,096 or you swim along the bottom. - Or? 1288 00:50:23,096 --> 00:50:25,887 - You get a girl is twice as hot, 1289 00:50:25,887 --> 00:50:27,646 and a little bit younger. 1290 00:50:27,646 --> 00:50:28,479 - You know what? 1291 00:50:28,479 --> 00:50:29,312 I'm willing to bet you 1292 00:50:29,312 --> 00:50:32,362 that I will be twice as satisfied winning back Nichole 1293 00:50:32,362 --> 00:50:34,976 than you ever would be fucking this random 1294 00:50:34,976 --> 00:50:37,197 high school sweetheart of yours. 1295 00:50:37,197 --> 00:50:38,679 - If you win her back. 1296 00:50:38,679 --> 00:50:40,846 - Oh, I'll win her back, all right? 1297 00:50:40,846 --> 00:50:42,601 I just got to get rid of this fiance of hers, 1298 00:50:42,601 --> 00:50:44,164 and I'm fucking golden. 1299 00:50:44,164 --> 00:50:46,664 - Yeah, well, okay, we'll see. 1300 00:50:48,184 --> 00:50:50,358 All right, you're ready? - Mm-hmm. 1301 00:50:50,358 --> 00:50:53,580 - Okay, time to beat is two minutes 47 seconds. 1302 00:50:53,580 --> 00:50:55,426 - Mm-hmm. - All right. 1303 00:50:55,426 --> 00:50:56,907 All right, on your mark. - Mm-hmm. 1304 00:50:56,907 --> 00:50:58,513 - Get set. - Mm-hmm. 1305 00:50:58,513 --> 00:50:59,883 - Go. 1306 00:50:59,883 --> 00:51:03,180 (water splashes) 1307 00:51:03,180 --> 00:51:05,763 (upbeat music) 1308 00:51:11,688 --> 00:51:15,325 - Please take a look at the outline for the midterm. 1309 00:51:15,325 --> 00:51:17,827 - Remember it represents 40% of your final grade, 1310 00:51:17,827 --> 00:51:19,846 so please, if you have any questions, 1311 00:51:19,846 --> 00:51:20,929 ask them now. 1312 00:51:27,871 --> 00:51:29,314 (John whistles) 1313 00:51:29,314 --> 00:51:30,147 - Goddamn! 1314 00:51:31,247 --> 00:51:33,157 - Come on, it won't be that bad 1315 00:51:33,157 --> 00:51:34,620 look at these questions. 1316 00:51:34,620 --> 00:51:35,987 - I don't know, Nichole. 1317 00:51:35,987 --> 00:51:39,121 I'm not good at taking tests. 1318 00:51:39,121 --> 00:51:42,092 - Maybe I can help you study. 1319 00:51:42,092 --> 00:51:43,675 - I like that idea. 1320 00:51:45,544 --> 00:51:48,544 (upbeat rock music) 1321 00:51:56,328 --> 00:51:57,903 - Hello, Nichole. 1322 00:51:57,903 --> 00:51:59,685 - Oh, you just missed John. 1323 00:51:59,685 --> 00:52:00,518 He went to class. 1324 00:52:00,518 --> 00:52:02,104 - Yeah, no, I know. 1325 00:52:02,104 --> 00:52:06,202 I was kinda hoping I could talk to you actually. 1326 00:52:06,202 --> 00:52:09,279 Look, John is, he's a good guy. 1327 00:52:09,279 --> 00:52:10,542 You know that, 1328 00:52:10,542 --> 00:52:15,541 but we both know that he's sensitive. 1329 00:52:16,759 --> 00:52:18,371 - Yeah, I know. 1330 00:52:18,371 --> 00:52:21,544 - So like the last time that you two were together, 1331 00:52:21,544 --> 00:52:23,711 and then you broke it off, 1332 00:52:25,516 --> 00:52:27,758 things got kinda bad, 1333 00:52:27,758 --> 00:52:29,717 like really bad. 1334 00:52:29,717 --> 00:52:30,550 - Oh, come on. 1335 00:52:30,550 --> 00:52:31,393 - No, I'm talking, 1336 00:52:31,393 --> 00:52:33,323 he was catatonic, okay. 1337 00:52:33,323 --> 00:52:36,218 It took a lot of serious vitamins to turn that boy around. 1338 00:52:36,218 --> 00:52:37,051 - What's your point? 1339 00:52:37,051 --> 00:52:41,756 - My point is I know you, you're evil, all right? 1340 00:52:41,756 --> 00:52:44,762 I know exactly what's gonna happen this time. 1341 00:52:44,762 --> 00:52:47,551 All I'm asking is that you give me some sort of heads up 1342 00:52:47,551 --> 00:52:49,158 before you fuck him over again, okay? 1343 00:52:49,158 --> 00:52:50,633 - Fuck you, Steve. 1344 00:52:50,633 --> 00:52:52,764 - If you wanna fuck me, that's fine. 1345 00:52:52,764 --> 00:52:55,909 Just like give me a heads up before you do it, okay? 1346 00:52:55,909 --> 00:52:57,425 Thank you. 1347 00:53:02,260 --> 00:53:05,010 - All right, for society to grow, 1348 00:53:05,906 --> 00:53:10,906 there have to be rules that everyone is in agreements with. 1349 00:53:11,092 --> 00:53:15,651 Now these are the laws that keep society going- 1350 00:53:15,651 --> 00:53:16,484 (door shuts) 1351 00:53:21,003 --> 00:53:24,920 but also there's the common sense things, like- 1352 00:53:27,539 --> 00:53:29,781 right now, it's also the common sense things 1353 00:53:29,781 --> 00:53:31,910 people forget, like they'll give someone a stick 1354 00:53:31,910 --> 00:53:33,276 to whoop you in the head with. 1355 00:53:33,276 --> 00:53:34,434 - Where the fuck were you? 1356 00:53:34,434 --> 00:53:37,532 - Dude them falling behind with all the homecoming crap. 1357 00:53:37,532 --> 00:53:41,395 I gotta get a suit, tickets, condoms, whatever. 1358 00:53:41,395 --> 00:53:43,334 I gotta get my paycheck after this class. 1359 00:53:43,334 --> 00:53:45,123 - At least, you know, you're actually gonna get laid. 1360 00:53:45,123 --> 00:53:47,417 Nichole's coming over later to study 1361 00:53:47,417 --> 00:53:48,803 whatever the fuck that means. 1362 00:53:48,803 --> 00:53:50,841 - It means you're gonna be a wreck for the rest of the day. 1363 00:53:50,841 --> 00:53:53,691 - Boys, y'all hear me? 1364 00:53:55,417 --> 00:53:56,750 - Seven. - Seven. 1365 00:53:57,710 --> 00:54:01,472 - Good, I thought you wasn't paying attention. 1366 00:54:01,472 --> 00:54:05,292 So that comes all the way down then to why people go there, 1367 00:54:05,292 --> 00:54:07,033 and why they end up having to wear them 1368 00:54:07,033 --> 00:54:08,866 before they go inside. 1369 00:54:11,308 --> 00:54:14,225 (video game music) 1370 00:54:16,142 --> 00:54:17,931 - No, no, no, boys come on, out. 1371 00:54:17,931 --> 00:54:20,398 So I got Nichole coming over at three to study. 1372 00:54:20,398 --> 00:54:21,750 - Hold on, we just need 15 minutes. 1373 00:54:21,750 --> 00:54:22,583 - Out! 1374 00:54:22,583 --> 00:54:24,168 - We're about to flip the score. 1375 00:54:24,168 --> 00:54:25,317 - Now! 1376 00:54:25,317 --> 00:54:28,149 - But John- - Look, do it tomorrow, Frank. 1377 00:54:28,149 --> 00:54:29,341 Come on, out boys. 1378 00:54:29,341 --> 00:54:30,368 Come on, let's move. 1379 00:54:30,368 --> 00:54:31,580 Let's move, quickly, let's go. 1380 00:54:31,580 --> 00:54:33,497 - We're going. - You guys move so slow. 1381 00:54:33,497 --> 00:54:34,918 Let's go, come on. 1382 00:54:34,918 --> 00:54:36,085 - All right, look at that, see here we go. 1383 00:54:36,085 --> 00:54:38,362 I'm moving along. - Move, let's hustle. 1384 00:54:38,362 --> 00:54:40,998 Let's get out of my house. 1385 00:54:40,998 --> 00:54:42,934 - It's our house too. - It's not. 1386 00:54:42,934 --> 00:54:44,525 No, it's not. 1387 00:54:44,525 --> 00:54:47,744 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1388 00:54:47,744 --> 00:54:50,913 ♪ Forever we could be together ♪ 1389 00:54:50,913 --> 00:54:54,197 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1390 00:54:54,197 --> 00:54:57,406 ♪ Forever we could be together ♪ 1391 00:54:57,406 --> 00:55:00,696 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1392 00:55:00,696 --> 00:55:03,921 ♪ Forever we could be together ♪ 1393 00:55:03,921 --> 00:55:06,204 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1394 00:55:06,204 --> 00:55:11,204 ♪ You know you've got to change your mind ♪ 1395 00:55:12,546 --> 00:55:17,546 ♪ Sometimes I don't think we have the time ♪ 1396 00:55:18,620 --> 00:55:23,441 ♪ Forever. Forever we could be together ♪ 1397 00:55:23,441 --> 00:55:26,603 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1398 00:55:26,603 --> 00:55:29,853 ♪ Forever we could be together ♪ 1399 00:55:29,853 --> 00:55:31,945 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1400 00:55:31,945 --> 00:55:36,945 ♪ Don't talk, don't move, we've got to rhyme ♪ 1401 00:55:38,506 --> 00:55:43,506 ♪ You say we haven't got the time ♪ 1402 00:55:44,533 --> 00:55:49,301 ♪ Together, forever we could be together ♪ 1403 00:55:49,301 --> 00:55:52,646 ♪ Together we could be forever ♪ 1404 00:55:52,646 --> 00:55:56,377 ♪ Forever we could be together ♪ 1405 00:55:56,377 --> 00:55:58,377 - Hey guys, John inside? 1406 00:55:59,756 --> 00:56:00,609 - Yeah. 1407 00:56:00,609 --> 00:56:03,192 (upbeat music) 1408 00:56:12,071 --> 00:56:12,904 - So... 1409 00:56:14,589 --> 00:56:16,236 how's Nigel? 1410 00:56:16,236 --> 00:56:17,793 - He's being a prick. 1411 00:56:17,793 --> 00:56:19,979 We got in this huge fight. 1412 00:56:19,979 --> 00:56:21,660 All he ever does this lie to me. 1413 00:56:21,660 --> 00:56:23,243 - That's not right. 1414 00:56:24,315 --> 00:56:26,261 - John, you know you don't have to get me drunk 1415 00:56:26,261 --> 00:56:27,678 to sleep with me. 1416 00:56:28,981 --> 00:56:31,731 - Ah, but I bought all this beer. 1417 00:56:36,515 --> 00:56:37,674 - How long do you give him? 1418 00:56:37,674 --> 00:56:39,343 - 10 minutes. 1419 00:56:39,343 --> 00:56:41,001 - Ouch, that's cold. 1420 00:56:41,001 --> 00:56:42,313 No faith in him? 1421 00:56:42,313 --> 00:56:44,302 He's a magnificent stallion. 1422 00:56:44,302 --> 00:56:46,068 - How long has it been? 1423 00:56:46,068 --> 00:56:46,901 Six years? 1424 00:56:47,738 --> 00:56:52,725 10 minutes at the top end unless they're actually studying. 1425 00:56:52,725 --> 00:56:55,475 (both chuckling) 1426 00:56:59,056 --> 00:57:02,049 - Wait Nichole, does this mean we're back together? 1427 00:57:02,049 --> 00:57:04,217 - Why does this have to mean anything? 1428 00:57:04,217 --> 00:57:07,139 Can't we just fuck for old time's sake. 1429 00:57:07,139 --> 00:57:11,540 - No, I don't want just some throwaway fuck. 1430 00:57:11,540 --> 00:57:12,712 I want you. 1431 00:57:12,712 --> 00:57:15,720 - Oh God, we can't just get back together, John. 1432 00:57:15,720 --> 00:57:17,652 It's been six years. 1433 00:57:17,652 --> 00:57:19,738 We're different people. 1434 00:57:19,738 --> 00:57:23,238 I'm just really pissed at Nigel right now. 1435 00:57:24,491 --> 00:57:26,611 It's revenge sex. 1436 00:57:26,611 --> 00:57:28,182 Can you handle that? 1437 00:57:28,182 --> 00:57:31,626 - No, I don't think I can. I have feelings here. 1438 00:57:31,626 --> 00:57:34,251 - Oh God, it's not about feelings, 1439 00:57:34,251 --> 00:57:36,999 and it's not about a relationship. 1440 00:57:36,999 --> 00:57:39,332 We had some good times sure, 1441 00:57:40,187 --> 00:57:42,238 but I've changed. 1442 00:57:42,238 --> 00:57:43,765 Maybe you haven't. 1443 00:57:43,765 --> 00:57:45,213 - I...I have. 1444 00:57:45,213 --> 00:57:47,318 - That's it, isn't it? 1445 00:57:47,318 --> 00:57:49,875 God, six years later and still the same old John. 1446 00:57:49,875 --> 00:57:50,982 - No. 1447 00:57:50,982 --> 00:57:52,494 - You know, I bet you're still duct taping yourself 1448 00:57:52,494 --> 00:57:54,421 to lawn chairs and jumping in the lake. 1449 00:57:54,421 --> 00:57:56,917 - Okay, my best time's almost a world record. 1450 00:57:56,917 --> 00:57:59,391 - You know, I almost love you, John, 1451 00:57:59,391 --> 00:58:01,417 but if you could just act like more of a man. 1452 00:58:01,417 --> 00:58:02,250 - I am. 1453 00:58:02,250 --> 00:58:03,179 - Hell, you hang out with your friends, 1454 00:58:03,179 --> 00:58:04,730 and live in your parents' basement. 1455 00:58:04,730 --> 00:58:08,382 Hell, you're still going to a two year community college. 1456 00:58:08,382 --> 00:58:09,886 You don't take your life seriously, 1457 00:58:09,886 --> 00:58:10,719 but you expect me 1458 00:58:10,719 --> 00:58:13,579 to think you can take a relationship seriously? 1459 00:58:13,579 --> 00:58:14,860 - Look, I've changed, okay? 1460 00:58:14,860 --> 00:58:16,081 You may not be able to see it - Bullshit! 1461 00:58:16,081 --> 00:58:18,167 - but I have. - Okay, take the chem class. 1462 00:58:18,167 --> 00:58:21,323 It is so obvious that you're just there to be around me. 1463 00:58:21,323 --> 00:58:22,745 That is a real class, 1464 00:58:22,745 --> 00:58:25,273 and you haven't listened to a word the professor said. 1465 00:58:25,273 --> 00:58:26,497 You don't care what you get on the exam. 1466 00:58:26,497 --> 00:58:29,712 You just invited me here to sleep with me, 1467 00:58:29,712 --> 00:58:33,236 and I came here because I wanted to too, 1468 00:58:33,236 --> 00:58:35,985 but now you're talking about a relationship. 1469 00:58:35,985 --> 00:58:38,475 You don't know the responsibility it takes 1470 00:58:38,475 --> 00:58:40,856 to make a relationship work. 1471 00:58:40,856 --> 00:58:43,730 - Oh I...I...I...I might- 1472 00:58:43,730 --> 00:58:45,139 - You know what? 1473 00:58:45,139 --> 00:58:47,106 I'll tell you what, 1474 00:58:47,106 --> 00:58:49,483 you wanna prove to me that you know what it takes 1475 00:58:49,483 --> 00:58:53,650 to build a real relationship, you ace that midterm. 1476 00:58:54,689 --> 00:58:55,522 - What? 1477 00:58:55,522 --> 00:58:57,201 - You get an A on that test, 1478 00:58:57,201 --> 00:59:00,334 and it'll show me that you know what it takes. 1479 00:59:00,334 --> 00:59:01,676 You don't get an A, 1480 00:59:01,676 --> 00:59:02,509 it's all over. 1481 00:59:02,509 --> 00:59:04,409 - Look, Nichole, that's fucking ridiculous. 1482 00:59:04,409 --> 00:59:05,486 - No buts. 1483 00:59:05,486 --> 00:59:06,778 I know it's crazy, 1484 00:59:06,778 --> 00:59:10,293 but I'm gonna give you your shot. 1485 00:59:10,293 --> 00:59:11,543 I owe you that. 1486 00:59:13,445 --> 00:59:15,375 You've got a week and a half 1487 00:59:15,375 --> 00:59:18,841 better take the plastic off those text books. 1488 00:59:18,841 --> 00:59:23,571 - But they're (stammers). 1489 00:59:23,571 --> 00:59:25,031 - Oh, my God. 1490 00:59:25,031 --> 00:59:27,448 (door opens) 1491 00:59:29,186 --> 00:59:30,353 - Bye, Nichole. 1492 00:59:30,353 --> 00:59:31,481 - Bye Nichole. 1493 00:59:31,481 --> 00:59:34,064 (upbeat music) 1494 00:59:37,740 --> 00:59:39,070 - Dibs on controller one. 1495 00:59:39,070 --> 00:59:41,653 (upbeat music) 1496 01:00:12,109 --> 01:00:13,359 Oh yeah, shit! 1497 01:00:34,837 --> 01:00:36,535 - (laughs) Cool Ranch! 1498 01:00:36,535 --> 01:00:38,790 - Right, I figured you do deserve to see me in something 1499 01:00:38,790 --> 01:00:40,414 that isn't a t-shirt. 1500 01:00:40,414 --> 01:00:41,693 - Hell, I've seen you naked. 1501 01:00:41,693 --> 01:00:45,637 - Hey, I thought we agreed to never talk about that. 1502 01:00:45,637 --> 01:00:47,223 - What's going on with the tie. 1503 01:00:47,223 --> 01:00:48,405 - Might wanna work on as a clip on, 1504 01:00:48,405 --> 01:00:50,236 so I don't know how to do it. 1505 01:00:50,236 --> 01:00:52,653 - Oh my God, come here, dude. 1506 01:00:57,694 --> 01:00:58,974 - What's this? 1507 01:00:58,974 --> 01:01:01,681 - If I don't pass my chemistry midterm, 1508 01:01:01,681 --> 01:01:03,684 I lose Nichole forever. 1509 01:01:03,684 --> 01:01:04,839 - So? 1510 01:01:04,839 --> 01:01:06,339 - So I'm studying. 1511 01:01:07,396 --> 01:01:09,104 - Aren't you on the air in an hour. 1512 01:01:09,104 --> 01:01:10,887 - Yeah, but I'm just gonna look at my notes 1513 01:01:10,887 --> 01:01:11,869 in between the songs 1514 01:01:11,869 --> 01:01:14,739 and then it's back to the wall, 1515 01:01:14,739 --> 01:01:16,739 no sleep for me tonight. 1516 01:01:18,163 --> 01:01:18,996 By the looks of it, 1517 01:01:18,996 --> 01:01:20,532 and you won't be getting very much either. 1518 01:01:20,532 --> 01:01:21,632 - Shit, I better not. 1519 01:01:21,632 --> 01:01:24,023 This stuff was expensive. 1520 01:01:24,023 --> 01:01:25,291 - All right, well, I thought I had. 1521 01:01:25,291 --> 01:01:26,825 - I'll Google it. 1522 01:01:26,825 --> 01:01:28,671 - You got condoms though, right? 1523 01:01:28,671 --> 01:01:31,061 - Buddy, I am a Trojan shareholder. 1524 01:01:31,061 --> 01:01:32,035 - Atta boy! 1525 01:01:32,035 --> 01:01:34,672 Well, remember if you get caught behind enemy lines 1526 01:01:34,672 --> 01:01:37,602 we will disavow any knowledge of your existence. 1527 01:01:37,602 --> 01:01:40,052 - For queen and country, sir. 1528 01:01:40,052 --> 01:01:41,084 - Godspeed. 1529 01:01:41,084 --> 01:01:44,001 (orchestral music) 1530 01:01:47,449 --> 01:01:49,054 - Oh and John? 1531 01:01:49,054 --> 01:01:54,054 You do realize those pages are double-sided, correct? 1532 01:01:54,121 --> 01:01:55,064 Good luck. 1533 01:01:55,064 --> 01:01:55,897 - Fuck! 1534 01:02:00,867 --> 01:02:02,817 ♪ They call me the Juggler ♪ 1535 01:02:02,817 --> 01:02:04,832 ♪ 'cause I always have three lovers ♪ 1536 01:02:04,832 --> 01:02:08,565 ♪ And I burn through Trojan rubbers like the road ♪ 1537 01:02:08,565 --> 01:02:10,531 ♪ And when I'm not between the sheets ♪ 1538 01:02:10,531 --> 01:02:12,840 ♪ I'm busy just staying undercover ♪ 1539 01:02:12,840 --> 01:02:17,469 ♪ And it is sweet being the Juggler ♪ 1540 01:02:17,469 --> 01:02:19,199 ♪ Hey. ♪ 1541 01:02:19,199 --> 01:02:21,366 - So you're Cindy's uncle? 1542 01:02:24,485 --> 01:02:25,318 - Uh-huh. 1543 01:02:31,174 --> 01:02:34,257 - What do you do you do for a living? 1544 01:02:36,733 --> 01:02:38,150 - I make bullets. 1545 01:02:39,655 --> 01:02:40,680 - Cool. 1546 01:02:40,680 --> 01:02:43,010 You like sell them to Mega Mart or? 1547 01:02:43,010 --> 01:02:45,372 (Shelly laughs) 1548 01:02:45,372 --> 01:02:47,164 - Zeke, Zeke, don't scare the boy, 1549 01:02:47,164 --> 01:02:48,878 don't scare the boy. 1550 01:02:48,878 --> 01:02:51,512 Honey, Zeke here is a big Teddy bear, 1551 01:02:51,512 --> 01:02:52,611 and you don't have to be scared, 1552 01:02:52,611 --> 01:02:53,735 aint that right, Zeke? 1553 01:02:53,735 --> 01:02:56,235 (Zeke growls) 1554 01:02:57,590 --> 01:02:59,713 - Well, that must be Cindy now coming down the stairs? 1555 01:02:59,713 --> 01:03:00,880 - Please God. 1556 01:03:03,571 --> 01:03:05,489 - Oh my God, look at my baby. 1557 01:03:05,489 --> 01:03:06,322 - [Zeke] Whoo! 1558 01:03:06,322 --> 01:03:07,682 - My beautiful girl. 1559 01:03:07,682 --> 01:03:08,826 Looks good enough to eat. 1560 01:03:08,826 --> 01:03:10,742 She gets that from her Aunt. 1561 01:03:10,742 --> 01:03:13,593 - Come here, girl, let me look at you. 1562 01:03:13,593 --> 01:03:15,271 Come on, spin around. 1563 01:03:15,271 --> 01:03:16,823 Goddamn! 1564 01:03:16,823 --> 01:03:17,656 Woo! 1565 01:03:17,656 --> 01:03:19,837 Now you got my card in case you need 1566 01:03:19,837 --> 01:03:20,856 to get in touch with me. 1567 01:03:20,856 --> 01:03:23,273 - Yeah, yes, sir, right here. 1568 01:03:25,793 --> 01:03:27,769 (foot stomps) 1569 01:03:27,769 --> 01:03:28,852 - Uncle Zeke. 1570 01:03:31,823 --> 01:03:32,656 - Come on. 1571 01:03:34,332 --> 01:03:36,046 - All right, be good have fun. 1572 01:03:36,046 --> 01:03:36,879 - Okay. 1573 01:03:40,038 --> 01:03:41,850 - You take care of our Cindy here, you hear? 1574 01:03:41,850 --> 01:03:43,122 - Oh yes, yes, sir. 1575 01:03:43,122 --> 01:03:44,476 - Not too good. 1576 01:03:44,476 --> 01:03:46,371 You gotta leave me some. 1577 01:03:46,371 --> 01:03:47,954 - Okay. - All right. 1578 01:03:48,802 --> 01:03:49,635 - All right. 1579 01:03:49,635 --> 01:03:51,302 - I'll walk you out. 1580 01:03:54,133 --> 01:03:55,406 - All this butt grabbing got me feeling kind 1581 01:03:55,406 --> 01:03:56,823 of a certain way. 1582 01:03:57,891 --> 01:04:01,141 Damn, them girls look like their grandma. 1583 01:04:03,950 --> 01:04:05,101 - Bye, bye, love birds. 1584 01:04:05,101 --> 01:04:07,692 Don't do anything I wouldn't do. 1585 01:04:07,692 --> 01:04:10,574 - Jesus, I thought we'd never get out of there. 1586 01:04:10,574 --> 01:04:12,796 - Yeah, sorry about that. 1587 01:04:12,796 --> 01:04:16,045 He wasn't supposed to be here today. 1588 01:04:16,045 --> 01:04:18,178 - You really think they believed that I'm in high school? 1589 01:04:18,178 --> 01:04:19,324 I mean. 1590 01:04:19,324 --> 01:04:21,511 - I told them you were a junior. 1591 01:04:21,511 --> 01:04:23,527 - Really? - Yeah. 1592 01:04:23,527 --> 01:04:25,028 Besides I told him you have a curfew, 1593 01:04:25,028 --> 01:04:27,964 and I'll be staying with some friends after homecoming. 1594 01:04:27,964 --> 01:04:29,214 - What friends? 1595 01:04:32,616 --> 01:04:34,616 - The ones at the hotel. 1596 01:04:54,612 --> 01:04:57,507 - You do look really great by the way. 1597 01:04:57,507 --> 01:04:58,340 - I know. 1598 01:04:59,280 --> 01:05:02,113 (car engine revs) 1599 01:05:07,887 --> 01:05:10,470 (upbeat music) 1600 01:05:12,168 --> 01:05:14,173 - Hey man, I really think we should upgrade 1601 01:05:14,173 --> 01:05:17,171 our video game system to something that's not 50 years old. 1602 01:05:17,171 --> 01:05:18,956 - I mean, we'll upgrade our video game system 1603 01:05:18,956 --> 01:05:21,810 when John upgrades his video game system. 1604 01:05:21,810 --> 01:05:22,676 - That's fair. 1605 01:05:22,676 --> 01:05:23,593 Yeah, yeah. 1606 01:05:24,528 --> 01:05:26,289 - I'm just gonna rack up these Ws, 1607 01:05:26,289 --> 01:05:27,749 'cause you haven't won in like ages, 1608 01:05:27,749 --> 01:05:28,902 like I'm really, 1609 01:05:28,902 --> 01:05:30,762 I'd rather play the computer at this point. 1610 01:05:30,762 --> 01:05:31,881 - This is why I hate playing 1611 01:05:31,881 --> 01:05:33,315 when you're wearing the victory shawl. 1612 01:05:33,315 --> 01:05:35,532 Let me just, I mean, you only Victors get 1613 01:05:35,532 --> 01:05:38,282 to wear the victory shawl loser. 1614 01:05:39,345 --> 01:05:40,339 - You're a loser. 1615 01:05:40,339 --> 01:05:41,662 - Your mom's a loser. 1616 01:05:41,662 --> 01:05:43,262 (upbeat music) 1617 01:05:43,262 --> 01:05:44,512 - Okay, thanks. 1618 01:05:46,828 --> 01:05:51,828 - Señor Dillard? Esteban? Estás tú? 1619 01:05:54,065 --> 01:05:56,650 Don't you think you're a little old 1620 01:05:56,650 --> 01:05:59,516 to be attending homecoming, 1621 01:05:59,516 --> 01:06:02,037 like maybe it's kinda inappropriate for you 1622 01:06:02,037 --> 01:06:03,370 to even be here. 1623 01:06:05,473 --> 01:06:08,690 - Well, it's no more inappropriate than the flask you keep 1624 01:06:08,690 --> 01:06:09,773 in your desk. 1625 01:06:10,709 --> 01:06:12,881 - Go have a good time, okay? 1626 01:06:12,881 --> 01:06:14,075 Yeah. (laughs) 1627 01:06:14,075 --> 01:06:14,908 Gracias. 1628 01:06:16,525 --> 01:06:18,354 - Yep, this is homecoming. 1629 01:06:18,354 --> 01:06:20,104 - I'll be right back. 1630 01:06:21,356 --> 01:06:23,939 (upbeat music) 1631 01:06:26,906 --> 01:06:27,810 - You know her? 1632 01:06:27,810 --> 01:06:29,087 - Yeah Cindy Pressman. 1633 01:06:29,087 --> 01:06:30,147 She's in my class. 1634 01:06:30,147 --> 01:06:31,096 - Yeah. 1635 01:06:31,096 --> 01:06:32,597 You want her don't you? 1636 01:06:32,597 --> 01:06:34,140 - Oh yeah, she's all right. 1637 01:06:34,140 --> 01:06:36,213 Yeah, well, it is never gonna happen, 1638 01:06:36,213 --> 01:06:39,869 so come on, don't worry, man. 1639 01:06:39,869 --> 01:06:40,895 You know what? 1640 01:06:40,895 --> 01:06:43,504 You keep your eye on those junior high girls, alright? 1641 01:06:43,504 --> 01:06:46,087 (upbeat music) 1642 01:06:47,030 --> 01:06:49,775 ♪ Heads up I don't know what is brewing ♪ 1643 01:06:49,775 --> 01:06:52,453 ♪ Look out, you're gonna have to get out my way ♪ 1644 01:06:52,453 --> 01:06:53,538 ♪ I won't stop ♪ 1645 01:06:53,538 --> 01:06:55,014 ♪ I'm doing what I'm doing ♪ 1646 01:06:55,014 --> 01:06:56,214 ♪ I'm trying to be a hero ♪ 1647 01:06:56,214 --> 01:06:59,353 ♪ And it's time for me to go save the day ♪ 1648 01:06:59,353 --> 01:07:02,270 - Shit, I gotta start taking notes. 1649 01:07:05,632 --> 01:07:08,132 Oh shit, 101.2, the bartender. 1650 01:07:09,338 --> 01:07:12,921 That was Adam Infantino with "Finding His Way." 1651 01:07:12,921 --> 01:07:17,921 Sorry about all that dead air I was well, whatever. 1652 01:07:17,953 --> 01:07:20,786 Up next to we got some Pus Buckets, some Shelly Wilkes, 1653 01:07:20,786 --> 01:07:22,927 and then Scrod for you, 1654 01:07:22,927 --> 01:07:25,096 so make sure to stick around, 1655 01:07:25,096 --> 01:07:26,847 but first caller to call in, 1656 01:07:26,847 --> 01:07:28,606 and tell me how to separate heavy molecules 1657 01:07:28,606 --> 01:07:31,236 from a phosphorus compound at room temperature 1658 01:07:31,236 --> 01:07:34,394 gets two tickets to Patrick Jaouen on the 17th, 1659 01:07:34,394 --> 01:07:36,969 so 101.2. 1660 01:07:38,535 --> 01:07:43,535 - [Man] 101.2, Rochester's, original (beep) station. 1661 01:07:43,745 --> 01:07:44,578 - God! 1662 01:07:46,117 --> 01:07:48,700 (mellow music) 1663 01:07:53,047 --> 01:07:54,997 - Well, I'm gonna go freshen up. 1664 01:07:54,997 --> 01:07:58,164 (mellow upbeat music) 1665 01:08:01,401 --> 01:08:04,151 - Well bed, it's just me and you. 1666 01:08:06,004 --> 01:08:07,992 You don't let me down, 1667 01:08:07,992 --> 01:08:11,176 maybe I'll wipe you off after. 1668 01:08:11,176 --> 01:08:12,404 Deal? 1669 01:08:12,404 --> 01:08:14,987 (mellow music) 1670 01:08:32,644 --> 01:08:35,306 - So what do you think? 1671 01:08:35,306 --> 01:08:37,323 - Lamb of God. 1672 01:08:45,129 --> 01:08:46,033 - Be gentle. 1673 01:08:46,033 --> 01:08:49,450 (mellow music continues) 1674 01:09:00,347 --> 01:09:02,930 (upbeat music) 1675 01:10:05,093 --> 01:10:07,095 - How was your test asshole? 1676 01:10:07,095 --> 01:10:08,527 - Don't ask. 1677 01:10:08,527 --> 01:10:10,027 How was the dance? 1678 01:10:12,207 --> 01:10:13,730 - Not so great. 1679 01:10:13,730 --> 01:10:14,711 - Don't tell me it didn't happen. 1680 01:10:14,711 --> 01:10:16,286 - No, it happened. 1681 01:10:16,286 --> 01:10:17,536 It's just that... 1682 01:10:20,160 --> 01:10:21,993 - It's just that what? 1683 01:10:23,237 --> 01:10:24,805 - All right, well, I didn't wanna fuck around 1684 01:10:24,805 --> 01:10:25,874 and cum too fast, 1685 01:10:25,874 --> 01:10:30,494 so I snuck off and jerked off in the bathroom three times 1686 01:10:30,494 --> 01:10:31,327 during the dance. 1687 01:10:31,327 --> 01:10:32,273 - (laughs) You did not. 1688 01:10:32,273 --> 01:10:33,860 - Yeah, yeah, I did. 1689 01:10:33,860 --> 01:10:36,719 - And then when it came time to assemble the troops, 1690 01:10:36,719 --> 01:10:38,508 we were out of ammo. 1691 01:10:38,508 --> 01:10:39,800 - So what did you do? 1692 01:10:39,800 --> 01:10:41,049 - I did what any good soldier would do, 1693 01:10:41,049 --> 01:10:42,599 I faked it. 1694 01:10:42,599 --> 01:10:43,759 - You faked it. 1695 01:10:43,759 --> 01:10:45,751 - Eight times. - Only eight? 1696 01:10:45,751 --> 01:10:47,431 - I ran out of condoms. 1697 01:10:47,431 --> 01:10:49,856 - So what, dude, you were faking it. 1698 01:10:49,856 --> 01:10:52,826 - Yeah, but I didn't wanna spoil the illusion. 1699 01:10:52,826 --> 01:10:55,903 - Well dude, Bravo, Mr. Copperfield. 1700 01:10:55,903 --> 01:10:56,775 - It's inhuman, man, 1701 01:10:56,775 --> 01:10:59,659 I can't live up to this chick's standards. 1702 01:10:59,659 --> 01:11:01,650 I mean, if I have to repeat a performance like that, 1703 01:11:01,650 --> 01:11:05,650 I'm gonna blow my colon out or worse. 1704 01:11:07,069 --> 01:11:08,631 - So you're coming to class today or what? 1705 01:11:08,631 --> 01:11:12,179 - Hell no, those chairs would kill me. 1706 01:11:12,179 --> 01:11:13,012 No. 1707 01:11:15,921 --> 01:11:19,020 When do you figure out about your test? 1708 01:11:19,020 --> 01:11:20,837 - Next week. 1709 01:11:20,837 --> 01:11:22,356 - I don't know if I made it though, man. 1710 01:11:22,356 --> 01:11:24,627 - No, I'm sure you did. 1711 01:11:24,627 --> 01:11:27,404 You and that science shit are like this, you know? 1712 01:11:27,404 --> 01:11:29,435 - I guess, yeah. 1713 01:11:29,435 --> 01:11:31,633 - Oh, oh, are you okay? 1714 01:11:31,633 --> 01:11:33,300 Come on. - Oh my God. 1715 01:11:35,065 --> 01:11:36,708 - [Steve Is it possible for your own sperm 1716 01:11:36,708 --> 01:11:38,221 to kick you in the nuts? 1717 01:11:38,221 --> 01:11:41,181 I didn't think that was. 1718 01:11:41,181 --> 01:11:43,034 - Dude, no friendly fire. 1719 01:11:43,034 --> 01:11:44,253 - Well, maybe don't get in my way. 1720 01:11:44,253 --> 01:11:45,086 - You shot me. 1721 01:11:45,086 --> 01:11:46,255 You fucking shot me. 1722 01:11:46,255 --> 01:11:47,348 - Yeah, I'm about to do it again. 1723 01:11:47,348 --> 01:11:49,345 - You miss more shots than a fucking Stormtrooper, 1724 01:11:49,345 --> 01:11:50,797 and you fucking shot me? 1725 01:11:50,797 --> 01:11:53,580 - Yeah, yeah, I did. - Bullshit! 1726 01:11:53,580 --> 01:11:54,439 - You're bullshit. 1727 01:11:54,439 --> 01:11:55,830 - Get wrecked. 1728 01:11:55,830 --> 01:11:56,663 - Fine. 1729 01:11:56,663 --> 01:11:57,718 (Bob laughs) 1730 01:11:57,718 --> 01:11:59,478 - I love you, man. - I love you too. 1731 01:11:59,478 --> 01:12:02,145 (both laughing) 1732 01:12:04,459 --> 01:12:05,869 - Hold on, hold on. 1733 01:12:05,869 --> 01:12:07,235 What if somebody comes? 1734 01:12:07,235 --> 01:12:08,568 - Somebody will. 1735 01:12:17,409 --> 01:12:19,076 - It's for the best. 1736 01:12:23,616 --> 01:12:25,392 - What do you want? 1737 01:12:25,392 --> 01:12:26,975 - I'm just leaving. 1738 01:12:30,795 --> 01:12:33,289 - I can't accept your exam sheet. 1739 01:12:33,289 --> 01:12:34,122 - But why? 1740 01:12:35,509 --> 01:12:37,037 - Because you were still filling in the bubbles 1741 01:12:37,037 --> 01:12:39,158 after I told everybody to put their pencils down, 1742 01:12:39,158 --> 01:12:40,669 I can't accept it. 1743 01:12:40,669 --> 01:12:42,210 - I busted my ass to finish. 1744 01:12:42,210 --> 01:12:43,643 All I was doing was filling out my name 1745 01:12:43,643 --> 01:12:44,622 on the other side of the sheet. 1746 01:12:44,622 --> 01:12:46,060 - Yeah, well, there are rules. 1747 01:12:46,060 --> 01:12:46,893 I'm sorry. 1748 01:12:49,221 --> 01:12:50,689 - Do you know who I am? 1749 01:12:50,689 --> 01:12:52,158 - No. 1750 01:12:52,158 --> 01:12:52,991 - Good. 1751 01:12:55,809 --> 01:12:58,469 - (laughs) Brilliant. 1752 01:12:58,469 --> 01:13:01,980 - Mr. Barden, I finished correcting your exam. 1753 01:13:01,980 --> 01:13:02,842 - You have? 1754 01:13:02,842 --> 01:13:04,723 - Yes, and I have to be honest, 1755 01:13:04,723 --> 01:13:06,694 I find it pretty surprising. 1756 01:13:06,694 --> 01:13:10,149 Well, I do you know some things about the periodic table. 1757 01:13:10,149 --> 01:13:12,805 - Apparently not, I mean, statistically speaking 1758 01:13:12,805 --> 01:13:15,032 you should have had at least one of those answers correct. 1759 01:13:15,032 --> 01:13:19,782 I mean, you really dinged the hell out of the bell curve. 1760 01:13:24,140 --> 01:13:25,710 You know Mr. Barden. 1761 01:13:25,710 --> 01:13:27,595 I noticed recently you've been kind of distracted. 1762 01:13:27,595 --> 01:13:31,687 I mean, are you going through something personal? 1763 01:13:31,687 --> 01:13:33,594 - Yeah, kind of. 1764 01:13:33,594 --> 01:13:36,471 I mean, I can make arrangements for you 1765 01:13:36,471 --> 01:13:37,823 to take the exam again. 1766 01:13:37,823 --> 01:13:40,451 - If I'm being honest I really don't think 1767 01:13:40,451 --> 01:13:42,437 it's gonna make too big of a difference, 1768 01:13:42,437 --> 01:13:44,314 but thank you. 1769 01:13:44,314 --> 01:13:45,630 - Look here, I'm gonna be honest with you. 1770 01:13:45,630 --> 01:13:46,547 I like you, 1771 01:13:47,603 --> 01:13:49,198 and frankly a lot. 1772 01:13:49,198 --> 01:13:53,281 I mean, would you like to get an A in this class? 1773 01:13:54,425 --> 01:13:55,592 - An A? - Yeah. 1774 01:13:58,024 --> 01:14:00,607 - What do I have to do for a C? 1775 01:14:02,886 --> 01:14:07,711 - Society will not allow a "Sissy" to- 1776 01:14:10,122 --> 01:14:12,218 You're late again, son. 1777 01:14:12,218 --> 01:14:14,200 Is that Professor Ding-a-ling-a-fing-a-dinger 1778 01:14:14,200 --> 01:14:15,700 keeping you after? 1779 01:14:17,110 --> 01:14:18,957 - Something like that. 1780 01:14:18,957 --> 01:14:20,054 - Where were you? 1781 01:14:20,054 --> 01:14:21,248 - I got my test back. 1782 01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:22,925 - Oh, nice, how'd you do? 1783 01:14:22,925 --> 01:14:24,316 - I got an A. 1784 01:14:24,316 --> 01:14:26,411 - Cool, man, I told you you got that chemistry down 1785 01:14:26,411 --> 01:14:27,614 to a science. 1786 01:14:27,614 --> 01:14:29,981 - Yeah, do you have any gum? 1787 01:14:29,981 --> 01:14:32,137 - Over the years it became- you have to make a sissy 1788 01:14:32,137 --> 01:14:33,734 which was a number- 1789 01:14:33,734 --> 01:14:35,817 - We have an ugly school. 1790 01:14:37,532 --> 01:14:39,302 (Cindy sniffles) 1791 01:14:39,302 --> 01:14:41,010 - Shit, Shit, shit! - What, what? 1792 01:14:41,010 --> 01:14:42,427 - Come on. - What? 1793 01:14:43,269 --> 01:14:44,720 Oh my God. 1794 01:14:44,720 --> 01:14:46,627 - Dude? - What? 1795 01:14:46,627 --> 01:14:47,460 - That's Cindy. 1796 01:14:47,460 --> 01:14:49,381 - Oh! - She's waiting for me. 1797 01:14:49,381 --> 01:14:51,250 - Are we gonna launch another offensive admiral. 1798 01:14:51,250 --> 01:14:53,344 - Dude, she can't get enough. 1799 01:14:53,344 --> 01:14:54,336 - Poor baby. 1800 01:14:54,336 --> 01:14:55,678 - No, I'm serious, man. 1801 01:14:55,678 --> 01:14:57,072 - All right, my pubes are going gray, 1802 01:14:57,072 --> 01:14:57,933 my back hurts, 1803 01:14:57,933 --> 01:15:00,624 I'm thirsty like all the time. 1804 01:15:00,624 --> 01:15:02,680 She's sucking the life out of me. 1805 01:15:02,680 --> 01:15:03,648 - Literally? - Yeah. 1806 01:15:03,648 --> 01:15:04,481 (John laughs) 1807 01:15:04,481 --> 01:15:06,722 - Look, if I'm not at your house in like two hours 1808 01:15:06,722 --> 01:15:08,647 you gotta text me, okay? 1809 01:15:08,647 --> 01:15:10,600 - Sure. - No, I'm serious, man. 1810 01:15:10,600 --> 01:15:11,433 All right? 1811 01:15:11,433 --> 01:15:12,266 You don't text me, 1812 01:15:12,266 --> 01:15:13,099 I might not make it. 1813 01:15:13,099 --> 01:15:14,151 I'm gonna need an excuse. 1814 01:15:14,151 --> 01:15:15,875 - Well, I mean, if you're gonna go out, 1815 01:15:15,875 --> 01:15:18,411 it's really not that bad of a way to do it. 1816 01:15:18,411 --> 01:15:19,244 - I don't know, 1817 01:15:19,244 --> 01:15:20,220 I feel like an old fashioned heart attack 1818 01:15:20,220 --> 01:15:22,389 might be a little bit easier. 1819 01:15:22,389 --> 01:15:23,566 - Maybe you'll get lucky. 1820 01:15:23,566 --> 01:15:25,120 - Maybe. - Ready? 1821 01:15:25,120 --> 01:15:28,287 - Yeah, let's go. - All right, come on. 1822 01:15:29,513 --> 01:15:31,483 (John laughs) 1823 01:15:31,483 --> 01:15:33,616 - John, this is Cindy. 1824 01:15:33,616 --> 01:15:35,366 Cindy, this is, John. 1825 01:15:37,465 --> 01:15:40,205 - Hi, I've heard so much about you. 1826 01:15:40,205 --> 01:15:41,156 - Really? 1827 01:15:41,156 --> 01:15:42,938 - No, I haven't actually, 1828 01:15:42,938 --> 01:15:43,771 but I'm gonna go, okay? 1829 01:15:43,771 --> 01:15:46,021 So you kids have fun, yeah. 1830 01:15:47,174 --> 01:15:48,341 - Hi, hi. - Hi. 1831 01:15:49,420 --> 01:15:52,670 (ambient guitar music) 1832 01:16:04,821 --> 01:16:09,821 ♪ And I see your shadow ♪ 1833 01:16:10,683 --> 01:16:15,683 ♪ In the ways in which you tear me down ♪ 1834 01:16:17,264 --> 01:16:20,746 ♪ In the distant hours of the night ♪ 1835 01:16:20,746 --> 01:16:22,746 - Let's go. - Yeah, yeah. 1836 01:16:23,711 --> 01:16:28,711 ♪ And it breathes the life back into me ♪ 1837 01:16:30,774 --> 01:16:35,774 ♪ And I sit on the outskirts of this town ♪ 1838 01:16:36,619 --> 01:16:39,741 ♪ Just a wandering minstel ♪ 1839 01:16:39,741 --> 01:16:43,929 ♪ In a room full of clowns ♪ 1840 01:16:43,929 --> 01:16:48,929 ♪ I sat there waiting for you ♪ 1841 01:16:49,670 --> 01:16:53,805 ♪ But you bring me up just to bring me down ♪ 1842 01:16:53,805 --> 01:16:55,555 ♪ No ♪ 1843 01:17:08,379 --> 01:17:10,629 - Water, God, I need water. 1844 01:17:18,605 --> 01:17:21,188 (upbeat music) 1845 01:17:22,956 --> 01:17:25,479 ♪ The rain outside is so strong ♪ 1846 01:17:25,479 --> 01:17:27,146 - We have to switch. 1847 01:17:29,502 --> 01:17:33,669 ♪ The water washes the filth away ♪ 1848 01:17:35,616 --> 01:17:37,616 That's not what I meant. 1849 01:17:38,606 --> 01:17:41,523 (video game music) 1850 01:17:42,424 --> 01:17:45,507 - Behold, I have emerged victorious. 1851 01:17:47,063 --> 01:17:49,225 Cindy, peed on me. 1852 01:17:49,225 --> 01:17:50,651 - Wait, what? 1853 01:17:50,651 --> 01:17:52,951 - She peed, I win. 1854 01:17:54,437 --> 01:17:55,718 - Who's Cindy? 1855 01:17:55,718 --> 01:17:56,664 - Steve's new girlfriend. 1856 01:17:56,664 --> 01:17:58,223 - How is that a good thing? 1857 01:17:58,223 --> 01:18:01,005 - (laughs) You see, she peed, 1858 01:18:01,005 --> 01:18:03,050 and then she stopped. 1859 01:18:03,050 --> 01:18:04,126 - Stopped peeing? 1860 01:18:04,126 --> 01:18:06,283 - Stopped having sex, 1861 01:18:06,283 --> 01:18:09,450 three weeks, two days, 16 hours later. 1862 01:18:10,444 --> 01:18:13,684 She's finally done. - Like for life? 1863 01:18:13,684 --> 01:18:15,320 - God, I hope so. 1864 01:18:15,320 --> 01:18:16,901 - You got fucking problems, man. 1865 01:18:16,901 --> 01:18:17,734 - I don't know, 1866 01:18:17,734 --> 01:18:19,965 it would take a lot for me to pee on a guy. 1867 01:18:19,965 --> 01:18:20,959 - Really, you should try it. 1868 01:18:20,959 --> 01:18:22,278 You might like it. 1869 01:18:22,278 --> 01:18:23,989 - This boy's a freak. 1870 01:18:23,989 --> 01:18:26,091 - It's no weirder than John's panty harvest. 1871 01:18:26,091 --> 01:18:27,270 - Panty what? 1872 01:18:27,270 --> 01:18:28,103 - Harvest. 1873 01:18:29,243 --> 01:18:31,571 You guys don't know about this? 1874 01:18:31,571 --> 01:18:33,610 John collects panties. 1875 01:18:33,610 --> 01:18:36,592 He used to take a pair from me every time we had sex. 1876 01:18:36,592 --> 01:18:40,040 He'd label it with the place, the time, and the date. 1877 01:18:40,040 --> 01:18:40,873 It was terrible. 1878 01:18:40,873 --> 01:18:42,664 I was spending a fortune on underwear. 1879 01:18:42,664 --> 01:18:44,365 - Sounds like a trophy collection. 1880 01:18:44,365 --> 01:18:46,662 - And that's exactly what it was. 1881 01:18:46,662 --> 01:18:48,159 - You know I still have it, right? 1882 01:18:48,159 --> 01:18:49,748 - Get out, you do not. 1883 01:18:49,748 --> 01:18:50,581 - Sure he does. 1884 01:18:50,581 --> 01:18:53,155 I just looked through it like two weeks ago. 1885 01:18:53,155 --> 01:18:53,988 - Where is it? 1886 01:18:53,988 --> 01:18:55,655 - It's in my closet. 1887 01:18:58,214 --> 01:19:00,062 - How many did you get? 1888 01:19:00,062 --> 01:19:01,592 - I don't even know, dude. 1889 01:19:01,592 --> 01:19:03,726 - 154. - No, shit. 1890 01:19:04,686 --> 01:19:05,519 - Yeah, man. 1891 01:19:05,519 --> 01:19:08,937 - Bro, you took 154 panties from that girl. 1892 01:19:08,937 --> 01:19:10,503 - Oh yeah, well, I mean she was buying in bulk 1893 01:19:10,503 --> 01:19:11,803 at the time, so. 1894 01:19:11,803 --> 01:19:12,803 - Oh my God. 1895 01:19:14,900 --> 01:19:16,954 I forgot how many of these there were. 1896 01:19:16,954 --> 01:19:19,121 - 154. - Man, I was a slut. 1897 01:19:23,540 --> 01:19:26,296 Nichole Richards, David Coffer's bedroom, 1898 01:19:26,296 --> 01:19:27,879 October 31st, 11:15pm. 1899 01:19:29,584 --> 01:19:31,307 I remember these. 1900 01:19:31,307 --> 01:19:32,140 - So do I. 1901 01:19:34,895 --> 01:19:38,923 - You know, I think we did it in your car more times 1902 01:19:38,923 --> 01:19:40,585 than we did it in an actual bed. 1903 01:19:40,585 --> 01:19:42,272 - I miss that car. 1904 01:19:42,272 --> 01:19:44,689 - Oh, I don't remember spots. 1905 01:19:49,964 --> 01:19:51,547 You son of a bitch. 1906 01:19:52,493 --> 01:19:53,326 - Look Nichole. 1907 01:19:53,326 --> 01:19:55,576 - Sarah Brand, Sarah Brand? 1908 01:19:57,033 --> 01:19:58,860 And right in the middle of our relationship, 1909 01:19:58,860 --> 01:20:01,271 you've fucked that fat bitch. 1910 01:20:01,271 --> 01:20:02,167 No, no, no, no I didn't. 1911 01:20:02,167 --> 01:20:04,003 Well, okay, yes, I did sleep with her, 1912 01:20:04,003 --> 01:20:06,047 but no, we weren't dating at the time. 1913 01:20:06,047 --> 01:20:07,866 It was one of those weekends that we'd broken up. 1914 01:20:07,866 --> 01:20:09,994 - And she did kinda look like you to be fair, 1915 01:20:09,994 --> 01:20:11,978 besides the whole fat thing, 1916 01:20:11,978 --> 01:20:13,405 but that's an honest mistake. 1917 01:20:13,405 --> 01:20:15,818 - Shut up! - Shut up! 1918 01:20:15,818 --> 01:20:18,235 - Brooke Peters, Anna Luther, 1919 01:20:19,445 --> 01:20:23,393 Tatiana Cruchev, the exchange student. 1920 01:20:23,393 --> 01:20:25,671 Jesus Christ, you are such an asshole! 1921 01:20:25,671 --> 01:20:26,708 - No, wait, no, no, no, no, no. 1922 01:20:26,708 --> 01:20:28,748 Okay, so you remember when you wanted to go look at schools, 1923 01:20:28,748 --> 01:20:31,637 so you dumped me so you could go check out campus, 1924 01:20:31,637 --> 01:20:34,445 and feel what it's like to be a single woman. 1925 01:20:34,445 --> 01:20:36,814 Oh, what was I supposed to do to just sit around, 1926 01:20:36,814 --> 01:20:38,125 and wait for you to come back, 1927 01:20:38,125 --> 01:20:40,497 get it out of your system. - Yes. 1928 01:20:40,497 --> 01:20:44,243 Why didn't you tell me when we got back together? 1929 01:20:44,243 --> 01:20:46,459 - Well, I knew it would piss you off. 1930 01:20:46,459 --> 01:20:48,655 - Well, congratulations. 1931 01:20:48,655 --> 01:20:50,738 - Nichole, Nichole, wait. 1932 01:20:52,426 --> 01:20:54,676 - You're not wearing pants. 1933 01:20:55,593 --> 01:20:57,983 - Oh, that kinda sucks. 1934 01:20:57,983 --> 01:20:59,472 You just got her back. 1935 01:20:59,472 --> 01:21:02,805 - Thank you Captain Bobvious, thank you. 1936 01:21:05,232 --> 01:21:06,065 Nichole? 1937 01:21:07,158 --> 01:21:07,991 Fuck! 1938 01:21:12,324 --> 01:21:15,338 - All right, I dare one of you to smell this. 1939 01:21:15,338 --> 01:21:16,255 - How much? 1940 01:21:21,973 --> 01:21:23,105 - Jesus, man! 1941 01:21:23,105 --> 01:21:24,932 Been out there knocking for half an hour, 1942 01:21:24,932 --> 01:21:26,682 why didn't you let me in? 1943 01:21:30,874 --> 01:21:32,141 - Oh shit! 1944 01:21:32,141 --> 01:21:34,239 - Oh, she is not gonna call you. 1945 01:21:34,239 --> 01:21:36,356 - Yes she is, she's just, she's just. 1946 01:21:36,356 --> 01:21:38,212 (phone rings) 1947 01:21:38,212 --> 01:21:39,045 Hello! 1948 01:21:40,423 --> 01:21:42,840 No, no, he doesn't live here. 1949 01:21:44,965 --> 01:21:46,932 - Wrong number? 1950 01:21:46,932 --> 01:21:47,765 - No. 1951 01:21:48,754 --> 01:21:51,825 Yeah, anyways, I gotta crash here for a few days. 1952 01:21:51,825 --> 01:21:53,647 I need sanctuary. 1953 01:21:53,647 --> 01:21:55,283 - From what? 1954 01:21:55,283 --> 01:21:56,961 - Little miss nympho. 1955 01:21:56,961 --> 01:21:59,044 She's a seminal vampire. 1956 01:22:01,027 --> 01:22:04,297 So is there any way you're gonna call miss underpants? 1957 01:22:04,297 --> 01:22:06,940 - No, I mean, what do I even say? 1958 01:22:06,940 --> 01:22:07,773 (Steve blows raspberries) 1959 01:22:07,773 --> 01:22:09,450 - You're asking me for advice on women? 1960 01:22:09,450 --> 01:22:11,283 You must be desperate. 1961 01:22:13,638 --> 01:22:16,805 - I'm not getting her back, am I, man? 1962 01:22:18,579 --> 01:22:19,579 - No 1963 01:22:19,579 --> 01:22:22,235 No, not by traditional means you're not. 1964 01:22:22,235 --> 01:22:23,068 You need to talk to somebody 1965 01:22:23,068 --> 01:22:27,226 who actually knows something about women, 1966 01:22:27,226 --> 01:22:30,585 and you need to get me a cheeseburger. 1967 01:22:30,585 --> 01:22:32,085 - Get it yourself. 1968 01:22:32,972 --> 01:22:34,471 - I can't, John, 1969 01:22:34,471 --> 01:22:35,888 I'm in sanctuary. 1970 01:22:42,006 --> 01:22:43,650 - My friends are assholes. 1971 01:22:43,650 --> 01:22:46,233 (bouncy music) 1972 01:22:55,904 --> 01:22:59,433 Well, we're coming up to the midnight hour, 1973 01:22:59,433 --> 01:23:01,144 the darkest hour. 1974 01:23:01,144 --> 01:23:03,058 The point in the night where you start to wonder, 1975 01:23:03,058 --> 01:23:05,750 if dawn will even come... Will it? 1976 01:23:05,750 --> 01:23:06,833 Probably not. 1977 01:23:07,697 --> 01:23:10,398 That was "Why Won't I Stop Crying" by Tweed Jacket, 1978 01:23:10,398 --> 01:23:11,394 and you know what? 1979 01:23:11,394 --> 01:23:13,060 I'm gonna play it again. 1980 01:23:13,060 --> 01:23:14,998 Anybody got any problem with that? 1981 01:23:14,998 --> 01:23:16,529 Didn't think so. 1982 01:23:16,529 --> 01:23:18,946 (Sam knocks) 1983 01:23:20,343 --> 01:23:21,720 Sam, my man. 1984 01:23:21,720 --> 01:23:22,957 You know anything about women? 1985 01:23:22,957 --> 01:23:23,790 - No. 1986 01:23:26,032 --> 01:23:27,199 - Good talk. 1987 01:23:33,438 --> 01:23:36,355 (video game music) 1988 01:23:40,677 --> 01:23:42,888 John, sorry the front door was wide open. 1989 01:23:42,888 --> 01:23:45,306 - Fucking Frank. - Where's Steve? 1990 01:23:45,306 --> 01:23:46,556 - I don't know. 1991 01:23:47,714 --> 01:23:49,000 - His fucking car is here. 1992 01:23:49,000 --> 01:23:52,250 - Oh, yeah, but I was gonna, oh, okay. 1993 01:23:53,796 --> 01:23:54,629 - Oh shit! 1994 01:23:56,336 --> 01:23:57,169 - Oops. 1995 01:23:58,152 --> 01:24:01,314 - Cindy, what the fuck are you doing here? 1996 01:24:01,314 --> 01:24:03,041 Have you met Betty? 1997 01:24:03,041 --> 01:24:05,986 - Can we go someplace private? 1998 01:24:05,986 --> 01:24:08,054 - I kind of had plans. 1999 01:24:08,054 --> 01:24:11,221 - I'm pregnant. - I get paid on Friday. 2000 01:24:12,767 --> 01:24:17,026 Look, I've actually given this quite a bit of thought. 2001 01:24:17,026 --> 01:24:18,526 - I just told you. 2002 01:24:19,750 --> 01:24:22,335 - It doesn't mean I haven't thought about it. 2003 01:24:22,335 --> 01:24:24,383 Contingencies, okay? 2004 01:24:24,383 --> 01:24:25,581 And I think it's best- 2005 01:24:25,581 --> 01:24:26,816 - I'm not keeping it. 2006 01:24:26,816 --> 01:24:27,888 - No, no, no, listen to me. 2007 01:24:27,888 --> 01:24:30,761 I think that we, what? 2008 01:24:30,761 --> 01:24:32,558 - What do I look like, an idiot? 2009 01:24:32,558 --> 01:24:33,613 I'm not having a kid, 2010 01:24:33,613 --> 01:24:35,873 let alone your kid at 18. 2011 01:24:35,873 --> 01:24:37,398 - What, why not? 2012 01:24:38,847 --> 01:24:41,037 - Steve, you're a loser. 2013 01:24:41,037 --> 01:24:42,685 I mean, look at you. 2014 01:24:42,685 --> 01:24:43,859 You're 25. 2015 01:24:43,859 --> 01:24:45,204 You work at a movie theater. 2016 01:24:45,204 --> 01:24:46,484 You spend all of your time bullshitting 2017 01:24:46,484 --> 01:24:47,486 with your stupid friends, 2018 01:24:47,486 --> 01:24:49,894 and knocking up underage employees. 2019 01:24:49,894 --> 01:24:51,203 You wouldn't make a good husband, 2020 01:24:51,203 --> 01:24:53,040 and you'd be a terrible father, 2021 01:24:53,040 --> 01:24:54,688 and I'm not gonna ruin my whole life 2022 01:24:54,688 --> 01:24:57,404 just to bring your child into the world. 2023 01:24:57,404 --> 01:24:58,827 - But okay, that's not a- 2024 01:24:58,827 --> 01:25:01,233 - No buts, I'm dumping you. 2025 01:25:01,233 --> 01:25:02,863 And I want your word, 2026 01:25:02,863 --> 01:25:05,808 your most serious pledge that you won't ever tell anyone 2027 01:25:05,808 --> 01:25:07,475 that I was pregnant. 2028 01:25:08,694 --> 01:25:11,600 - Hold on, hold on, that's not how this is supposed, 2029 01:25:11,600 --> 01:25:13,277 because I thought we- 2030 01:25:13,277 --> 01:25:16,212 - Look, Steve, you have a hot car. 2031 01:25:16,212 --> 01:25:17,634 You bought me beer. 2032 01:25:17,634 --> 01:25:20,063 Dating you made all my friends jealous, 2033 01:25:20,063 --> 01:25:21,823 but I'm getting out of high school soon, 2034 01:25:21,823 --> 01:25:23,792 and there are a lot of guys who have way more 2035 01:25:23,792 --> 01:25:25,981 to offer than you. 2036 01:25:25,981 --> 01:25:28,816 I want a man who can handle me as a woman, 2037 01:25:28,816 --> 01:25:29,983 not as a girl. 2038 01:25:30,938 --> 01:25:33,243 I'll see you around. 2039 01:25:33,243 --> 01:25:34,076 - But. 2040 01:25:36,085 --> 01:25:40,168 Okay, well you know what you're fired anyway, so. 2041 01:25:41,195 --> 01:25:43,919 I mean, do you believe that shit? 2042 01:25:43,919 --> 01:25:46,250 Anyway, where were we? 2043 01:25:46,250 --> 01:25:47,417 - Oh, fuck no. 2044 01:25:49,411 --> 01:25:50,328 - What're y--? 2045 01:25:54,233 --> 01:25:56,709 (suspenseful music) 2046 01:25:56,709 --> 01:25:58,459 - What are you doing? 2047 01:25:59,466 --> 01:26:01,485 - Son, is you peeping? 2048 01:26:01,485 --> 01:26:02,318 - What? 2049 01:26:02,318 --> 01:26:04,095 No, it's not like that at all. 2050 01:26:04,095 --> 01:26:05,950 - Look, Willie? 2051 01:26:05,950 --> 01:26:07,146 - No, it's John. 2052 01:26:07,146 --> 01:26:08,428 Dude, I'm in your class 2053 01:26:08,428 --> 01:26:12,814 - Right, John, you can't be peeping on folks 2054 01:26:12,814 --> 01:26:14,038 when they don't know about it. 2055 01:26:14,038 --> 01:26:15,598 It just ain't right. 2056 01:26:15,598 --> 01:26:16,747 - I know, okay, I'm sorry. 2057 01:26:16,747 --> 01:26:20,194 - Although if you're paid 'em for it, 2058 01:26:20,194 --> 01:26:22,351 that'd be all right. (chuckles) 2059 01:26:22,351 --> 01:26:24,898 Who are you peeping on anyway? 2060 01:26:24,898 --> 01:26:29,082 - Well it, my girlfriend and I got into a fight, so. 2061 01:26:29,082 --> 01:26:31,724 - Oh, yeah, girlfriends, that's tough you know, 2062 01:26:31,724 --> 01:26:33,368 I hear that it's a lot of trouble, 2063 01:26:33,368 --> 01:26:35,917 but you know that doesn't allow you to be peeping on folks 2064 01:26:35,917 --> 01:26:37,175 without them knowing about it, 2065 01:26:37,175 --> 01:26:40,003 especially here on the campus, okay? 2066 01:26:40,003 --> 01:26:42,384 - No, look, I know, okay, I'm sorry. 2067 01:26:42,384 --> 01:26:43,958 - Okay, good. - It won't happen again. 2068 01:26:43,958 --> 01:26:45,901 - I'll sees you back in class then. 2069 01:26:45,901 --> 01:26:50,151 - Yeah, so Mr. Robertson, can I ask you a question? 2070 01:26:51,272 --> 01:26:52,522 - You just did. 2071 01:26:53,481 --> 01:26:55,635 (chuckles) I was always here for my students. 2072 01:26:55,635 --> 01:26:57,026 What can I do you for? 2073 01:26:57,026 --> 01:27:00,634 - So I broke up with my girlfriend the other day. 2074 01:27:00,634 --> 01:27:01,983 Okay, look, I'm gonna be honest with you, 2075 01:27:01,983 --> 01:27:03,733 she broke up with me. 2076 01:27:05,627 --> 01:27:08,638 It's cause every time when we used to break up, 2077 01:27:08,638 --> 01:27:11,454 I would just go and sleep with like half of the high school, 2078 01:27:11,454 --> 01:27:12,984 that was like seven years ago though, 2079 01:27:12,984 --> 01:27:15,563 so I guess what I'm asking is 2080 01:27:15,563 --> 01:27:17,682 how do I get her back? 2081 01:27:17,682 --> 01:27:21,624 - She broke half a school up seven years ago. 2082 01:27:21,624 --> 01:27:22,683 - Dude. - That's incredible. 2083 01:27:22,683 --> 01:27:24,266 - No man, we broke, 2084 01:27:25,187 --> 01:27:26,621 dude, nevermind, man. 2085 01:27:26,621 --> 01:27:28,363 I'm just, I'll get outta here. 2086 01:27:28,363 --> 01:27:30,958 - All right, John, John, wait, hold up, hold up. 2087 01:27:30,958 --> 01:27:33,708 Listen, I know, forget the teeth. 2088 01:27:35,528 --> 01:27:37,575 I can't tell you how to get your girl back, 2089 01:27:37,575 --> 01:27:39,959 but I can tell you this, 2090 01:27:39,959 --> 01:27:42,195 life is full of crossroads, 2091 01:27:42,195 --> 01:27:45,959 you know, points that make you a sit up and take notice. 2092 01:27:45,959 --> 01:27:47,539 You got a lot of choices to make, 2093 01:27:47,539 --> 01:27:50,293 and sometimes you make the wrong ones, 2094 01:27:50,293 --> 01:27:54,377 and when that happens you gotta wake up, you know. 2095 01:27:54,377 --> 01:27:55,778 Re-evaluate what's going on. 2096 01:27:55,778 --> 01:27:56,932 Figure out what you're doing wrong, 2097 01:27:56,932 --> 01:27:59,237 and then get back on track. 2098 01:27:59,237 --> 01:28:00,386 You run yourself into the ground 2099 01:28:00,386 --> 01:28:03,648 you're gonna end up crazy and alone. 2100 01:28:03,648 --> 01:28:04,648 You hear me? 2101 01:28:06,504 --> 01:28:09,361 Good, all right, let me ask you this, 2102 01:28:09,361 --> 01:28:10,861 does she hate you? 2103 01:28:12,117 --> 01:28:13,633 Good. 2104 01:28:13,633 --> 01:28:15,716 Hate and love are the same. 2105 01:28:15,716 --> 01:28:18,246 It's apathy that you can't repair. 2106 01:28:18,246 --> 01:28:21,575 I mean, once that hits, it's like a brick wall, you know? 2107 01:28:21,575 --> 01:28:23,093 And then you're just left to face the rest 2108 01:28:23,093 --> 01:28:27,844 of your life with all the hope and glory behind you. 2109 01:28:27,844 --> 01:28:30,101 It'll make you bitter. 2110 01:28:30,101 --> 01:28:31,684 You still got time. 2111 01:28:33,327 --> 01:28:34,494 Use it wisely. 2112 01:28:37,236 --> 01:28:38,319 - Okay, okay. 2113 01:28:39,773 --> 01:28:41,693 - I got my own sociology project. 2114 01:28:41,693 --> 01:28:43,046 I'm working on. 2115 01:28:43,046 --> 01:28:47,296 I'll see you later, Gary. (laughs) 2116 01:28:48,142 --> 01:28:49,643 - What the fuck was that? 2117 01:28:49,643 --> 01:28:51,530 Oh my God (laughs) 2118 01:28:51,530 --> 01:28:52,977 Where is Steve? 2119 01:28:52,977 --> 01:28:57,910 (depressing Rock guitar) 2120 01:28:59,098 --> 01:29:02,181 - Jesus, what the hell happened here? 2121 01:29:03,192 --> 01:29:05,025 - Man, you guys stink. 2122 01:29:06,056 --> 01:29:08,889 When's the last time you showered? 2123 01:29:09,731 --> 01:29:11,289 - We're out of beer. 2124 01:29:11,289 --> 01:29:13,973 - Yeah, so it's the rest of Rochester from the look of it. 2125 01:29:13,973 --> 01:29:17,224 - I can see sober at the end of the horizon, 2126 01:29:17,224 --> 01:29:18,929 and I don't like it. 2127 01:29:18,929 --> 01:29:22,899 - Damn, these bitches fucked you boys all the way up. 2128 01:29:22,899 --> 01:29:24,971 - How much longer you guys think you're gonna be at this? 2129 01:29:24,971 --> 01:29:27,179 - I think we got enough sips and drops 2130 01:29:27,179 --> 01:29:29,885 for like two more hours. 2131 01:29:29,885 --> 01:29:33,362 - Well shit, we're not gonna be here that long. 2132 01:29:33,362 --> 01:29:34,467 - Where are you going? 2133 01:29:34,467 --> 01:29:35,339 (upbeat music) 2134 01:29:35,339 --> 01:29:37,434 - We have a book tour. 2135 01:29:37,434 --> 01:29:38,942 - A what? 2136 01:29:38,942 --> 01:29:39,775 - Yeah, we've been working 2137 01:29:39,775 --> 01:29:41,539 with professor Robertson all semester. 2138 01:29:41,539 --> 01:29:43,223 - Sorry, we couldn't tell ya. 2139 01:29:43,223 --> 01:29:45,069 - What you wrote a book? 2140 01:29:45,069 --> 01:29:45,970 - Yeah. 2141 01:29:45,970 --> 01:29:48,758 What you think we just spend all our time here? (laughs) 2142 01:29:48,758 --> 01:29:50,434 - Yeah. - Yeah. 2143 01:29:50,434 --> 01:29:51,916 - Well, we have this idea 2144 01:29:51,916 --> 01:29:54,673 that most people were basically sheep. 2145 01:29:54,673 --> 01:29:56,469 You put them in the room with an authority figure, 2146 01:29:56,469 --> 01:29:58,458 and they'll follow along no matter how outrageous, 2147 01:29:58,458 --> 01:30:00,849 or ridiculous that person is. 2148 01:30:00,849 --> 01:30:02,749 - So we took that idea to professor Robertson, 2149 01:30:02,749 --> 01:30:04,858 and he suggested a grand social experiment 2150 01:30:04,858 --> 01:30:08,275 with his sociology 101 class, your class, 2151 01:30:09,492 --> 01:30:13,159 and thus crazy professor Robertson was born. 2152 01:30:15,847 --> 01:30:17,480 - Hey, we brought you guys a gift. 2153 01:30:17,480 --> 01:30:19,801 - Yeah, and why do you think we're here? 2154 01:30:19,801 --> 01:30:21,801 Ta-dah, and it's signed. 2155 01:30:23,893 --> 01:30:26,257 Come on guys, don't be too hard on yourselves. 2156 01:30:26,257 --> 01:30:28,551 You're the only ones who saw through the experiment. 2157 01:30:28,551 --> 01:30:30,569 Turns out being huge assholes 2158 01:30:30,569 --> 01:30:33,152 helps you see through bullshit. 2159 01:30:34,373 --> 01:30:35,653 - Well, we gotta jet. 2160 01:30:35,653 --> 01:30:38,794 We'll see in like four months. 2161 01:30:38,794 --> 01:30:39,901 You guys still be right here yeah? 2162 01:30:39,901 --> 01:30:40,890 - Yeah. - Yeah. 2163 01:30:40,890 --> 01:30:42,848 - Yeah. - Yeah. (laughs) 2164 01:30:42,848 --> 01:30:43,681 - Later. 2165 01:30:45,729 --> 01:30:49,546 - Guys do us a favor get off your asses 2166 01:30:49,546 --> 01:30:52,647 and get something done, all right? 2167 01:30:52,647 --> 01:30:54,546 (Frank and Bob laughing) 2168 01:30:54,546 --> 01:30:57,129 (upbeat music) 2169 01:30:59,488 --> 01:31:01,988 (John knocks) 2170 01:31:06,092 --> 01:31:06,925 - Hi. 2171 01:31:06,925 --> 01:31:07,985 - Go away, I'm not coming out. 2172 01:31:07,985 --> 01:31:08,818 - Why? 2173 01:31:09,945 --> 01:31:12,259 - Okay, I'm not leaving though. 2174 01:31:12,259 --> 01:31:13,113 I have another plan, 2175 01:31:13,113 --> 01:31:15,689 and I don't think you're gonna like it. 2176 01:31:15,689 --> 01:31:17,006 - [Nichole] Go away! 2177 01:31:17,006 --> 01:31:18,589 - Okay, I warned you. 2178 01:31:21,626 --> 01:31:23,878 ♪ We wishes precious moments ♪ 2179 01:31:23,878 --> 01:31:28,794 ♪ away ♪ 2180 01:31:28,794 --> 01:31:30,263 ♪ Believer ♪ 2181 01:31:30,263 --> 01:31:31,096 Yeah. 2182 01:31:33,061 --> 01:31:33,894 Yeah! 2183 01:31:34,939 --> 01:31:36,378 (car honks) 2184 01:31:36,378 --> 01:31:40,772 ♪ I couldn't give you the ocean ♪ 2185 01:31:40,772 --> 01:31:42,742 ♪ And I couldn't take it away ♪ 2186 01:31:42,742 --> 01:31:45,006 - All right, say your peace then go. 2187 01:31:45,006 --> 01:31:50,006 - Okay, look, Nichole I'm sorry, okay. 2188 01:31:50,502 --> 01:31:51,581 I can't change the past, 2189 01:31:51,581 --> 01:31:54,929 but I can change this path that I'm on now. 2190 01:31:54,929 --> 01:31:56,855 I mean, I need you. 2191 01:31:56,855 --> 01:31:57,752 I don't wanna lose you again. 2192 01:31:57,752 --> 01:32:00,085 I mean, especially not like this. 2193 01:32:01,089 --> 01:32:02,390 I mean, this is ridiculous, 2194 01:32:02,390 --> 01:32:03,776 I mean, how many guys did you sleep with, 2195 01:32:03,776 --> 01:32:06,122 that I never give you shit about any of them? 2196 01:32:06,122 --> 01:32:08,038 - Those weren't guys you knew. 2197 01:32:08,038 --> 01:32:10,000 - What difference does it make if I know them or not? 2198 01:32:10,000 --> 01:32:11,752 - John, those girls 2199 01:32:11,752 --> 01:32:14,998 when we got back together they knew that I didn't know. 2200 01:32:14,998 --> 01:32:16,768 I must've been a laughing stock. 2201 01:32:16,768 --> 01:32:18,131 - Oh my God, nobody cared. 2202 01:32:18,131 --> 01:32:19,630 Nichole, nobody gave a shit!. 2203 01:32:19,630 --> 01:32:22,873 - Hey, put your fucking boyfriend, 2204 01:32:22,873 --> 01:32:25,620 and his little fucking sausage away. 2205 01:32:25,620 --> 01:32:27,261 - He's not my boyfriend. - What? 2206 01:32:27,261 --> 01:32:29,736 - Oh, okay, great, I don't fucking care, 2207 01:32:29,736 --> 01:32:32,288 and nobody wants to see his 'lil yogurt slinger out here. 2208 01:32:32,288 --> 01:32:34,306 Put it the fuck away! 2209 01:32:34,306 --> 01:32:35,378 - This is dumb, all right? 2210 01:32:35,378 --> 01:32:36,613 You have to take me back. 2211 01:32:36,613 --> 01:32:37,469 - Take you back? 2212 01:32:37,469 --> 01:32:38,302 - Yeah. 2213 01:32:38,302 --> 01:32:39,381 - I'm not even talking to you. 2214 01:32:39,381 --> 01:32:41,965 - We're talking right now. - No, we're not. 2215 01:32:41,965 --> 01:32:45,757 John, relationships are about sacrifice not apology. 2216 01:32:45,757 --> 01:32:46,954 Don't you understand that? 2217 01:32:46,954 --> 01:32:48,326 - You don't think I know about sacrifice. 2218 01:32:48,326 --> 01:32:49,757 Are you fucking kidding me? 2219 01:32:49,757 --> 01:32:51,428 - I sucked a fucking dick for you. 2220 01:32:51,428 --> 01:32:52,261 - What? 2221 01:32:52,261 --> 01:32:53,695 - Bitching to me about a fucking sacrifices, 2222 01:32:53,695 --> 01:32:54,565 are you kidding? 2223 01:32:54,565 --> 01:32:57,004 Complaining about getting laughed at in high school. 2224 01:32:57,004 --> 01:32:58,628 What about Nigel's wife? 2225 01:32:58,628 --> 01:32:59,482 Do you even think about that, 2226 01:32:59,482 --> 01:33:01,649 how's that any different? 2227 01:33:02,961 --> 01:33:07,752 I mean, do you even believe half the shit you even say? 2228 01:33:07,752 --> 01:33:08,865 What am I doing here? 2229 01:33:08,865 --> 01:33:10,538 - Great fucking question, I got an idea, 2230 01:33:10,538 --> 01:33:12,163 wrap your fucking cheese log up 2231 01:33:12,163 --> 01:33:14,796 before you squeeze it onto a cracker, 2232 01:33:14,796 --> 01:33:16,355 Get outta here. 2233 01:33:16,355 --> 01:33:18,285 - Okay, you know what? 2234 01:33:18,285 --> 01:33:19,202 This is it. 2235 01:33:20,125 --> 01:33:22,458 I really don't care anymore. 2236 01:33:23,894 --> 01:33:25,213 Live your life. 2237 01:33:25,213 --> 01:33:26,713 Have your affairs. 2238 01:33:27,599 --> 01:33:29,569 I can't keep up with this anymore, okay. 2239 01:33:29,569 --> 01:33:34,569 You've been fucking me up for eight years, eight years. 2240 01:33:34,965 --> 01:33:37,147 I just gotta get myself back on track. 2241 01:33:37,147 --> 01:33:39,064 - No, wait, John, wait. 2242 01:33:42,411 --> 01:33:45,120 ♪ Who are you now? ♪ 2243 01:33:45,120 --> 01:33:47,703 (upbeat music) 2244 01:33:49,443 --> 01:33:50,960 - You're sure about this? 2245 01:33:50,960 --> 01:33:52,127 - Yeah. - Good. 2246 01:33:53,373 --> 01:33:55,083 Welcome back to the land of the living. 2247 01:33:55,083 --> 01:33:57,691 - (laughs) No kidding. 2248 01:33:57,691 --> 01:34:00,108 - So how do you think we did? 2249 01:34:01,061 --> 01:34:01,925 - What in class? 2250 01:34:01,925 --> 01:34:02,876 - Yeah. 2251 01:34:02,876 --> 01:34:04,732 - Yeah, I think we got to a B in Robertson's, 2252 01:34:04,732 --> 01:34:06,623 'cause of the extra credit, 2253 01:34:06,623 --> 01:34:09,873 and then I got my A in chem, so that's... 2254 01:34:11,563 --> 01:34:13,252 - Shit! - What? 2255 01:34:13,252 --> 01:34:15,914 - That puts you pretty close to graduating, doesn't it? 2256 01:34:15,914 --> 01:34:19,924 - (chuckles) That kinda does. 2257 01:34:19,924 --> 01:34:22,052 You think we should? 2258 01:34:22,052 --> 01:34:23,969 - What graduate? - Yeah. 2259 01:34:26,992 --> 01:34:29,492 - All right, fuck it, why not? 2260 01:34:30,495 --> 01:34:32,190 And then what? 2261 01:34:32,190 --> 01:34:33,705 - I dunno, man. 2262 01:34:33,705 --> 01:34:36,424 Something, we gotta do something, right? 2263 01:34:36,424 --> 01:34:38,079 - Yeah. 2264 01:34:38,079 --> 01:34:39,177 How are you doing? 2265 01:34:39,177 --> 01:34:41,992 - Just give me a sec one more sec and I got it. 2266 01:34:41,992 --> 01:34:45,331 Oh, oh, dude. (laughs) 2267 01:34:45,331 --> 01:34:46,514 - Two minutes and three seconds, 2268 01:34:46,514 --> 01:34:47,741 what's the record for the hot tub. 2269 01:34:47,741 --> 01:34:50,880 - Steve my man, we just set it. 2270 01:34:50,880 --> 01:34:52,771 - Holy shit. - That's right. 2271 01:34:52,771 --> 01:34:53,771 - Oh my God. 2272 01:34:55,315 --> 01:34:58,595 - How do we not have girlfriends yet? 2273 01:34:58,595 --> 01:35:02,262 Years and years of trying this out. 2274 01:35:08,413 --> 01:35:11,433 ♪ There you go again ♪ 2275 01:35:11,433 --> 01:35:15,273 ♪ Doing the bare minimum ♪ 2276 01:35:15,273 --> 01:35:18,800 ♪ On a scale of one to 10 ♪ 2277 01:35:18,800 --> 01:35:22,733 ♪ You don't even make it to one ♪ 2278 01:35:22,733 --> 01:35:26,533 ♪ You're complacent with taking anything that you can get ♪ 2279 01:35:26,533 --> 01:35:28,416 ♪ You're so lazy on the daily ♪ 2280 01:35:28,416 --> 01:35:30,280 ♪ Never put the effort in ♪ 2281 01:35:30,280 --> 01:35:35,280 ♪ And it's pretty clear that you ain't looking to change ♪ 2282 01:35:37,783 --> 01:35:41,767 ♪ Like a catfish swimming way below the surface ♪ 2283 01:35:41,767 --> 01:35:45,331 ♪ Livin' off of what falls in too deep ♪ 2284 01:35:45,331 --> 01:35:47,158 ♪ Never try to rise up ♪ 2285 01:35:47,158 --> 01:35:48,928 ♪ 'Cause it'll be a burden ♪ 2286 01:35:48,928 --> 01:35:51,639 ♪ You know what you are ♪ 2287 01:35:51,639 --> 01:35:55,353 ♪ You're just a bottom feeder ♪ 2288 01:35:55,353 --> 01:36:00,353 ♪ You're just a bottom feeder ♪ 2289 01:36:00,871 --> 01:36:03,968 ♪ You've always gotten by ♪ 2290 01:36:03,968 --> 01:36:07,468 (ambient orchestra music) 2291 01:37:03,392 --> 01:37:05,975 (upbeat music) 2292 01:37:33,682 --> 01:37:36,849 (ambient piano music) 2293 01:38:11,508 --> 01:38:14,091 (upbeat music) 2294 01:38:26,937 --> 01:38:29,365 (people laughing) 2295 01:38:29,365 --> 01:38:32,198 (people shushing) 2296 01:38:35,872 --> 01:38:38,455 (upbeat music)