1 00:00:07,945 --> 00:00:10,197 (grand orchestral fanfare playing) 2 00:00:33,429 --> 00:00:35,681 (gentle melody playing) 3 00:00:53,824 --> 00:00:56,118 * * 4 00:01:03,084 --> 00:01:05,211 TIM: Time is a funny thing. 5 00:01:05,252 --> 00:01:07,254 -When I was a kid... -YOUNG TIM: One. 6 00:01:07,296 --> 00:01:08,964 -...the days lasted forever. -Two. 7 00:01:09,006 --> 00:01:10,341 -Hide, hide, hide! -Three. 8 00:01:10,383 --> 00:01:11,967 -TIM: But the years... -Wait! Over here. 9 00:01:12,009 --> 00:01:13,302 -...well, they went by so fast. -Four. 10 00:01:13,344 --> 00:01:15,179 -Five. Six. -Tim, no peeking. 11 00:01:15,221 --> 00:01:16,514 TED SR.: Yeah, no peeking. 12 00:01:16,555 --> 00:01:17,973 -TIM: Before you know it... -Seven. 13 00:01:18,015 --> 00:01:19,350 -...you're all grown-up. -Eight. 14 00:01:19,392 --> 00:01:21,310 -It even happened to me. -Nine. 15 00:01:21,352 --> 00:01:23,312 Nine and a half. Ten! 16 00:01:23,354 --> 00:01:25,523 Ready or not, here I come. (grunts) 17 00:01:25,564 --> 00:01:27,775 My name's Tim, and this... 18 00:01:27,817 --> 00:01:29,777 well, this is the rest of my story. 19 00:01:29,819 --> 00:01:31,487 -(roars playfully) -Run for your lives! 20 00:01:31,529 --> 00:01:33,155 (laughing): No fair, Dad. You peeked. 21 00:01:33,197 --> 00:01:34,949 (laughter, squealing) 22 00:01:34,990 --> 00:01:37,118 -They call me a stay-at-home dad, which means...-Let's go! 23 00:01:37,159 --> 00:01:39,161 ...I hardly get to stay at home. 24 00:01:39,203 --> 00:01:41,122 Buckle up, Templetons. 25 00:01:41,163 --> 00:01:42,748 Ready? 26 00:01:42,790 --> 00:01:44,458 -Set. -Go! 27 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:46,877 (engine roars, tires squeal) 28 00:01:46,919 --> 00:01:48,379 TIM: Now, some might say 29 00:01:48,421 --> 00:01:50,631 I still have an overactive imagination, 30 00:01:50,673 --> 00:01:54,093 but being a dad is the coolest job in the world. 31 00:01:54,135 --> 00:01:55,761 Bunch of cool jobs, really. 32 00:01:55,803 --> 00:01:57,388 (laughing) 33 00:01:57,430 --> 00:01:58,973 Sometimes I'm a race car driver. 34 00:01:59,014 --> 00:02:01,183 CAROL: Whoo! Daddy-o Andretti! 35 00:02:01,225 --> 00:02:02,685 TABITHA: Yay, Templetons! 36 00:02:02,727 --> 00:02:04,311 TIM (Southern accent): Well, and then sometimes 37 00:02:04,353 --> 00:02:05,896 I'm the best darn cook in the county 38 00:02:05,938 --> 00:02:07,189 and I deal out every meal. 39 00:02:07,231 --> 00:02:09,442 -Come on, Pa, hit me. -(burps) 40 00:02:09,483 --> 00:02:11,318 -(chuckles) Tina. -(Tina laughs) 41 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:13,571 Whew, doggie! And the house wins again. 42 00:02:13,612 --> 00:02:15,322 -(thunder crashes) -CAROL: Yay! -TABITHA: Woo-hoo! 43 00:02:15,364 --> 00:02:17,950 TIM (spooky voice): Or a surgeon, if need be. (chuckles) 44 00:02:17,992 --> 00:02:19,952 -Spork. -Spork. 45 00:02:19,994 --> 00:02:21,829 -Spatula. -Spatula. 46 00:02:21,871 --> 00:02:25,416 Give my creature life! 47 00:02:25,458 --> 00:02:28,210 -(growling) -(Carol and Tabitha gasp) 48 00:02:28,252 --> 00:02:29,712 She's alive! 49 00:02:29,754 --> 00:02:32,006 TIM: We have our ups, and we have our downs. 50 00:02:32,048 --> 00:02:33,382 -(whimpers) -No, no, no. Look. Look. 51 00:02:33,424 --> 00:02:34,675 -Lamb Lamb's okay. See? -Yay! 52 00:02:34,717 --> 00:02:36,510 TIM: But we always stick together. 53 00:02:36,552 --> 00:02:38,679 -My wife, Carol. -It's a miracle! 54 00:02:38,721 --> 00:02:40,639 TIM: She's the breadwinner of the family. 55 00:02:40,681 --> 00:02:42,558 -(applause) -Thank you. You know what they say: 56 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:44,268 -"It's all about the dough." -(laughter) 57 00:02:44,310 --> 00:02:46,187 And I couldn't have done it without my husband. 58 00:02:46,228 --> 00:02:47,772 He really rose to the occasion. 59 00:02:47,813 --> 00:02:50,024 -It's the yeast I can do. -(cheering) -Yeah, Mama! 60 00:02:50,066 --> 00:02:52,234 TIM: She brings home the bacon, too, 61 00:02:52,276 --> 00:02:54,445 while I keep an eye on our new baby, Tina. 62 00:02:54,487 --> 00:02:56,447 (chuckles): But sometimes, feels like 63 00:02:56,489 --> 00:02:58,407 she's keeping an eye on me. 64 00:02:58,449 --> 00:03:00,034 -And Tabitha... -Thank you! 65 00:03:00,076 --> 00:03:02,203 ...our little second-grader who just got accepted 66 00:03:02,244 --> 00:03:03,829 -into the best school in town. -(laughter) 67 00:03:03,871 --> 00:03:05,164 Yay, Tabitha! 68 00:03:05,206 --> 00:03:06,665 TIM: We're so proud. 69 00:03:06,707 --> 00:03:08,334 I still keep in touch with the old gang, too. 70 00:03:08,376 --> 00:03:09,877 Believe it or not, Jimbo is mayor now. 71 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:11,629 -BOTH: Cookie! -Of course, his wife, Staci, 72 00:03:11,670 --> 00:03:13,464 is the real brains behind the operation. 73 00:03:13,506 --> 00:03:15,341 -MAN: Yo, Jimbo! -Now, the Triplets... 74 00:03:15,383 --> 00:03:16,759 -* Busted... * -* Busted... * 75 00:03:16,801 --> 00:03:18,386 -* Busted. * -(sirens wailing) 76 00:03:18,427 --> 00:03:20,054 TIM: Yeah, they haven't changed much. 77 00:03:20,096 --> 00:03:21,931 And as for my baby brother, Ted, 78 00:03:21,972 --> 00:03:24,058 well, he grew up to be the boss, all right. 79 00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:26,644 -He's so busy we hardly see him anymore.-(toy squeaking) 80 00:03:26,685 --> 00:03:28,479 -(phone rings) -But, hey, he always remembers 81 00:03:28,521 --> 00:03:30,940 to send inappropriately lavish gifts 82 00:03:30,981 --> 00:03:32,733 -on special occasions. -(Tabitha squeals) 83 00:03:32,775 --> 00:03:35,569 -OMG! Uncle Ted is the best! -(neighing) 84 00:03:35,611 --> 00:03:37,738 -(clatters) -(Tim gasps) 85 00:03:37,780 --> 00:03:38,906 (sighs) 86 00:03:38,948 --> 00:03:40,366 TIM: All in all, 87 00:03:40,408 --> 00:03:42,284 my life is pretty perfect. 88 00:03:42,326 --> 00:03:43,619 (insects trilling, birds chirping) 89 00:03:43,661 --> 00:03:45,871 But all that was about to change. 90 00:03:45,913 --> 00:03:47,915 (yelps, gasps) 91 00:03:47,957 --> 00:03:49,166 Good heavens. 92 00:03:49,208 --> 00:03:51,335 I'll save you! 93 00:03:51,377 --> 00:03:53,337 -Ha! -(Tina screams, laughs) 94 00:03:53,379 --> 00:03:54,922 Thanks, babe. 95 00:03:54,964 --> 00:03:56,340 Stay calm, Tabitha. 96 00:03:56,382 --> 00:03:57,800 I'm coming for you. 97 00:03:57,842 --> 00:04:01,804 I'm gonna save you from the bubbling lava! 98 00:04:01,846 --> 00:04:03,431 Dad, what are you doing? 99 00:04:03,472 --> 00:04:05,850 Ew, gross. It went everywhere. 100 00:04:05,891 --> 00:04:08,436 Come on, this is the candy volcano of doom! 101 00:04:08,477 --> 00:04:10,646 You used to love it. (mimics explosion) 102 00:04:10,688 --> 00:04:12,773 But I'm trying to do my homework, 103 00:04:12,815 --> 00:04:14,275 or I'm doomed. 104 00:04:14,316 --> 00:04:16,027 Oh. 105 00:04:16,068 --> 00:04:18,237 Because if there's one thing I've learned, 106 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:19,947 you're only a kid once. 107 00:04:19,989 --> 00:04:23,325 Once you grow up, you can never go back. 108 00:04:23,367 --> 00:04:26,287 (babbling) 109 00:04:26,328 --> 00:04:28,539 Ee...! 110 00:04:29,623 --> 00:04:31,333 (grunts) 111 00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:35,004 (gasps) Oh, no. 112 00:04:36,672 --> 00:04:38,758 Good night, Dr. Hawking. 113 00:04:42,678 --> 00:04:46,849 Carbon, boron, beryllium, lithium, helium, hydrogen. 114 00:04:46,891 --> 00:04:48,934 Nailed it. 115 00:04:48,976 --> 00:04:50,853 Boom shakalaka. 116 00:04:52,938 --> 00:04:54,398 (laughs) 117 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:56,484 "Carry the four." (chuckles) Gosh. 118 00:04:56,525 --> 00:04:58,110 -TIM: Hey there, Tabitha. -(Carol whoops, Tina laughs) 119 00:04:58,152 --> 00:04:59,653 It's The Good Night Show. 120 00:04:59,695 --> 00:05:02,573 Live from your bedroom, starring Dad and Mom. 121 00:05:02,615 --> 00:05:05,326 -And special guest, baby Tina. -(laughing) 122 00:05:05,368 --> 00:05:07,495 Good night, little Tina. Mwah! 123 00:05:07,536 --> 00:05:09,288 Come back here, you. (chuckles) 124 00:05:09,330 --> 00:05:10,873 -Good night, Mom. -Mwah! 125 00:05:10,915 --> 00:05:12,541 Good night, sweetheart. Mama's gonna kiss you. 126 00:05:12,583 --> 00:05:14,001 -Mama gonna kiss you. -(Tim clears throat) 127 00:05:14,043 --> 00:05:15,211 * Good night song * 128 00:05:15,252 --> 00:05:16,712 -* With your dad... * -What? 129 00:05:16,754 --> 00:05:18,339 What? It's time for your good-night song. 130 00:05:18,381 --> 00:05:20,049 Oh, no, thanks. 131 00:05:20,091 --> 00:05:22,426 I'm listening to white noise! 132 00:05:22,468 --> 00:05:24,011 Helps me fall asleep! 133 00:05:24,053 --> 00:05:26,180 (mimicking white noise) 134 00:05:26,222 --> 00:05:28,391 Hey, what would you say 135 00:05:28,432 --> 00:05:31,352 to me helping you rehearse for the holiday pageant? 136 00:05:31,394 --> 00:05:32,812 -(gasps) -Yes! Right? 137 00:05:32,853 --> 00:05:34,689 I can come to school with you, and you can get 138 00:05:34,730 --> 00:05:36,357 all your friends together, and we can rehearse together, 139 00:05:36,399 --> 00:05:38,359 go get some ice cream after. 140 00:05:38,401 --> 00:05:40,444 -My treat. -No! You can't do that. 141 00:05:40,486 --> 00:05:42,488 Um, liability issues. 142 00:05:42,530 --> 00:05:44,365 It's this whole thing. 143 00:05:44,407 --> 00:05:46,701 Oh. Right, right. (chuckles) 144 00:05:46,742 --> 00:05:47,952 Right. 145 00:05:47,993 --> 00:05:50,579 Whoa. How about your favorite bedtime story? 146 00:05:50,621 --> 00:05:52,498 You know, the one about... 147 00:05:52,540 --> 00:05:54,583 Uncle Ted was a magical talking baby. 148 00:05:54,625 --> 00:05:56,627 There was a rocket full of puppies, 149 00:05:56,669 --> 00:05:58,629 -and you saved the world. -(shushing) 150 00:05:58,671 --> 00:06:00,047 It was a good story, wasn't it? 151 00:06:00,089 --> 00:06:04,093 Well, it didn't really make a lot of sense. 152 00:06:04,135 --> 00:06:05,886 The jokes were good, right? 153 00:06:05,928 --> 00:06:07,346 Mm. 154 00:06:07,388 --> 00:06:09,390 -Okay. Um... -Dad. 155 00:06:09,432 --> 00:06:10,683 (yawns) 156 00:06:10,725 --> 00:06:13,060 My schedule is brutal tomorrow. 157 00:06:13,102 --> 00:06:16,063 (grunting): Yeah. My schedule's pretty brutal, too. 158 00:06:16,105 --> 00:06:18,065 Oh, don't forget Lamb Lamb. 159 00:06:18,107 --> 00:06:19,900 Good night, Lamb Lamb. 160 00:06:19,942 --> 00:06:21,819 (kisses) Good night, Uncle Ted. 161 00:06:21,861 --> 00:06:24,655 I hope to grow up and be a success, just like you. 162 00:06:24,697 --> 00:06:26,949 Maybe we'll see you soon. 163 00:06:31,037 --> 00:06:32,955 Good night, Tabitha. 164 00:06:33,998 --> 00:06:36,959 Don't you think I'm a little old for that now? 165 00:06:38,127 --> 00:06:39,628 Uh, okay. 166 00:06:39,670 --> 00:06:42,173 I think it's time we both grow up. 167 00:06:42,214 --> 00:06:45,551 I look forward to greeting you at the breakfast table. 168 00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:53,851 Sweet dreams. 169 00:07:09,867 --> 00:07:11,744 Hmm. 170 00:07:13,037 --> 00:07:15,122 * * 171 00:07:21,170 --> 00:07:23,464 Where has the time gone? 172 00:07:23,506 --> 00:07:25,925 WIZZIE: How should I know? (grunts) 173 00:07:25,966 --> 00:07:28,719 -Wait, wait. I see light. -(toy train tooting) 174 00:07:28,761 --> 00:07:31,680 You, oh, out of my way. (yells) 175 00:07:31,722 --> 00:07:33,808 (gasps) At long last. 176 00:07:33,849 --> 00:07:36,519 The sweet breath of freedom. 177 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:37,770 Wizzie? 178 00:07:37,812 --> 00:07:39,480 You there, what century is this? 179 00:07:39,522 --> 00:07:41,816 (shudders) Unhand me, vile ogre! 180 00:07:41,857 --> 00:07:43,401 No, no, no, no. Wizzie, it's me. 181 00:07:43,442 --> 00:07:44,944 -It's Tim. -(gasps) 182 00:07:44,985 --> 00:07:46,904 Is it really you? 183 00:07:46,946 --> 00:07:48,572 Come closer. 184 00:07:48,614 --> 00:07:50,533 Let me see your face. 185 00:07:50,574 --> 00:07:52,326 Closer. 186 00:07:52,368 --> 00:07:54,412 Closer still. 187 00:07:54,453 --> 00:07:56,247 Oh, Timothy. 188 00:07:56,288 --> 00:07:57,498 It is you. 189 00:07:57,540 --> 00:07:59,208 Hey! What was that for? 190 00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:01,419 You cast me into eternal darkness 191 00:08:01,460 --> 00:08:04,338 and wreaked havoc on my circadian rhythms. 192 00:08:04,380 --> 00:08:05,673 I'm sorry, Wizzie. 193 00:08:05,715 --> 00:08:07,341 Hey, but you look great, though. 194 00:08:07,383 --> 00:08:09,552 Except for the arm, you mean. 195 00:08:09,593 --> 00:08:10,845 (chuckles) I didn't even notice. 196 00:08:10,886 --> 00:08:12,263 -You thought it. -I mean, I noticed it, 197 00:08:12,304 --> 00:08:13,889 'cause I... you obviously don't have an arm. I-I... 198 00:08:13,931 --> 00:08:15,808 You would never treat Lamb Lamb this way. 199 00:08:15,850 --> 00:08:18,602 Well, I... I gave her to my daughter, Tabitha. 200 00:08:18,644 --> 00:08:20,396 You have produced an heir, Timothy? 201 00:08:20,438 --> 00:08:21,731 Two, actually. 202 00:08:21,772 --> 00:08:23,274 Two? Let the bells ring! 203 00:08:23,315 --> 00:08:24,650 (bells jingling, alarms blaring) 204 00:08:24,692 --> 00:08:26,318 -No, no, no. Wizzie, stop. -Yes! Yes! 205 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,195 -Wizzie, shh! Quiet, quiet. -It's a time for celebration! 206 00:08:28,237 --> 00:08:30,197 No, no, no. It's not the time for celebration. 207 00:08:30,239 --> 00:08:31,907 -Wizzie, shh. Be quiet. -What? What is it? 208 00:08:31,949 --> 00:08:33,826 -What is it, Tim? -I don't know. 209 00:08:33,868 --> 00:08:35,661 -(alarms stop) -I guess I'm just not feeling 210 00:08:35,703 --> 00:08:37,788 very celebratory right now. 211 00:08:37,830 --> 00:08:39,707 Oh? 212 00:08:39,749 --> 00:08:41,542 Tabitha. (sighs) 213 00:08:41,584 --> 00:08:45,713 Man, Wizzie, she's growing up so fast. 214 00:08:45,755 --> 00:08:47,757 It's like she doesn't even need me anymore. 215 00:08:47,798 --> 00:08:51,343 Yes, first, they start spending less time with you. 216 00:08:51,385 --> 00:08:52,803 TIM: Mm. 217 00:08:52,845 --> 00:08:55,014 Then they stop coming to you for advice. 218 00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:56,015 Exactly. 219 00:08:56,057 --> 00:08:58,142 Soon, they take you for granted. 220 00:08:58,184 --> 00:08:59,560 I guess. 221 00:08:59,602 --> 00:09:01,520 -Then break your arm. -What? 222 00:09:01,562 --> 00:09:03,105 Then stuff you into a box! 223 00:09:03,147 --> 00:09:05,066 Okay. Wizzie, you're... you're not helping. 224 00:09:05,107 --> 00:09:06,359 (Wizzie scoffs) 225 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:07,735 Okay, I'm just... I'm afraid 226 00:09:07,777 --> 00:09:09,820 Tabitha and I are growing apart, 227 00:09:09,862 --> 00:09:12,907 like... like I did with my brother. 228 00:09:12,948 --> 00:09:14,617 Oh. 229 00:09:14,658 --> 00:09:17,703 I thought we had all the time in the world. 230 00:09:17,745 --> 00:09:20,414 But you can't turn back time, can you? 231 00:09:20,456 --> 00:09:23,042 How dare you question my power! 232 00:09:23,084 --> 00:09:26,462 -Turn back. Turn back. -Oh, here we go. 233 00:09:26,504 --> 00:09:29,090 -Oh, great wheel of li... -Wait. (shushes) 234 00:09:29,131 --> 00:09:30,925 -(Wizzie snoring) -Did you hear that? 235 00:09:30,966 --> 00:09:33,928 (gasps) Never abuse the snooze button! 236 00:09:33,969 --> 00:09:36,013 (shushes) It sounds like it's coming from the baby's room. 237 00:09:36,055 --> 00:09:38,015 What is it? A creature of the night? 238 00:09:38,057 --> 00:09:41,102 Witches? Is it the baying of the hounds of hell? 239 00:09:41,143 --> 00:09:42,436 Wizzie! 240 00:09:42,478 --> 00:09:43,604 Don't go, Tim! 241 00:09:43,646 --> 00:09:45,189 I can turn back time-- 242 00:09:45,231 --> 00:09:48,776 to the golden years, when it was just you and me. 243 00:09:48,818 --> 00:09:50,444 My good arm. 244 00:09:50,486 --> 00:09:52,196 Don't open the door. 245 00:09:52,238 --> 00:09:54,115 (fading in distance): Remember last time! 246 00:09:54,156 --> 00:09:56,659 (muffled voice speaking indistinctly) 247 00:09:57,827 --> 00:09:59,829 AUTOMATED VOICE: If you would like to make a call, 248 00:09:59,870 --> 00:10:01,330 please hang up and try again. 249 00:10:01,372 --> 00:10:05,501 If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator. 250 00:10:05,543 --> 00:10:07,294 Thank you. 251 00:10:07,336 --> 00:10:08,462 (whispers): Hello? 252 00:10:08,504 --> 00:10:10,047 If you would like to make a call, 253 00:10:10,089 --> 00:10:12,717 -please hang up and try again. -Ah. Just my phone. 254 00:10:12,758 --> 00:10:14,844 Get it together, man. 255 00:10:14,885 --> 00:10:17,179 Oh, Tina, you little klepto... 256 00:10:17,221 --> 00:10:19,265 Nighty night. 257 00:10:19,306 --> 00:10:20,474 ...maniac! 258 00:10:20,516 --> 00:10:22,977 (rapid babbling) 259 00:10:23,018 --> 00:10:24,145 Whoa! 260 00:10:24,186 --> 00:10:26,897 Hi, Daddy. 261 00:10:26,939 --> 00:10:28,983 T-Tabitha? Is that you? 262 00:10:29,025 --> 00:10:30,234 (laughing) 263 00:10:30,276 --> 00:10:31,652 (gasps) 264 00:10:31,694 --> 00:10:33,696 (laughing): You should've seen your face. 265 00:10:33,738 --> 00:10:35,573 Oh, it's priceless. 266 00:10:35,614 --> 00:10:37,074 You're... You... You-you... 267 00:10:37,116 --> 00:10:39,493 (mock gasping) 268 00:10:39,535 --> 00:10:40,995 You-you can talk? 269 00:10:41,037 --> 00:10:43,164 Yep. I'm in the family business. 270 00:10:43,205 --> 00:10:45,833 (whispers): It's a clip-on tie. (shushes) 271 00:10:45,875 --> 00:10:48,127 You see, Daddy, BabyCorp is more of what I... 272 00:10:48,169 --> 00:10:49,795 Oops. 273 00:10:49,837 --> 00:10:52,173 Daddy, Daddy, come in. Can you hear me? 274 00:10:52,214 --> 00:10:53,799 -Daddy, do you read me? -(Tim groaning) 275 00:10:53,841 --> 00:10:55,509 Daddy, how many fingers am I holding up? 276 00:10:55,551 --> 00:10:56,719 Thursday? 277 00:10:56,761 --> 00:10:58,012 I should've given you a warning. 278 00:10:58,054 --> 00:10:59,555 I forgot you were an old man. 279 00:10:59,597 --> 00:11:01,057 (yells, spits) 280 00:11:01,098 --> 00:11:02,058 Wait, wait. 281 00:11:02,099 --> 00:11:03,934 -You're from BabyCorp? -Yes. 282 00:11:03,976 --> 00:11:05,936 BabyCorp is more of what I call 283 00:11:05,978 --> 00:11:07,772 -a side hustle for me. -Uh-huh. 284 00:11:07,813 --> 00:11:09,857 The point is I'm all in on the Templetons. 285 00:11:09,899 --> 00:11:11,359 -Go, Templetons! -Oh! Okay. 286 00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:13,194 You guys really know how to baby a baby. 287 00:11:13,235 --> 00:11:14,779 -I mean, it's incredible. -Oh, oh. (chuckles) 288 00:11:14,820 --> 00:11:16,364 Not that's it's all five-star. 289 00:11:16,405 --> 00:11:18,366 -I have to say, you got a lot of issues. -Sure. Yeah. 290 00:11:18,407 --> 00:11:19,575 We'll talk about that later. 291 00:11:19,617 --> 00:11:20,993 Oh, my gosh. I can't believe this. 292 00:11:21,035 --> 00:11:23,162 Hey, want to go scare the crap out of Mom? 293 00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:25,122 -Daddy, please stay focused. -(chuckles) Oh. 294 00:11:25,164 --> 00:11:26,665 (grunts) Right, right, right. 295 00:11:26,707 --> 00:11:28,376 There's a crisis at BabyCorp. 296 00:11:28,417 --> 00:11:29,502 What is it this time? 297 00:11:29,543 --> 00:11:30,544 (gasps) Kittens? 298 00:11:30,586 --> 00:11:32,671 No. This time, it's even worse. 299 00:11:32,713 --> 00:11:33,923 -Worse than kittens? -Yes. 300 00:11:33,964 --> 00:11:35,716 That's why I volunteered for 301 00:11:35,758 --> 00:11:37,593 -this supersecret assignment. -TOY: Mommy. 302 00:11:37,635 --> 00:11:39,512 Ooh, I want to help. What-what do you want me to do? 303 00:11:39,553 --> 00:11:41,055 That's the spirit, Daddy. 304 00:11:41,097 --> 00:11:43,891 -You are exactly who I need. -Yes! 305 00:11:43,933 --> 00:11:45,684 To get Uncle Ted. 306 00:11:45,726 --> 00:11:47,395 No. What? 307 00:11:47,436 --> 00:11:48,896 What-What's with the face? 308 00:11:48,938 --> 00:11:51,399 Daddy, BabyCorp can't wait any longer. 309 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:52,692 All the pressure's on me, Pop. 310 00:11:52,733 --> 00:11:54,902 When I volunteered for this gig, 311 00:11:54,944 --> 00:11:56,821 I thought it would be easy. 312 00:11:56,862 --> 00:11:58,406 But you two never see each other. 313 00:11:58,447 --> 00:11:59,990 It's so sad. 314 00:12:00,032 --> 00:12:02,201 It's like, "F-minus. See me after class." 315 00:12:02,243 --> 00:12:03,411 (gargles) 316 00:12:03,452 --> 00:12:04,745 Sad? Uh, yeah, maybe. 317 00:12:04,787 --> 00:12:05,955 A little. I don't know. 318 00:12:05,996 --> 00:12:07,373 Did you forget to call him? 319 00:12:07,415 --> 00:12:09,291 I noticed you can be a little absentminded. 320 00:12:09,333 --> 00:12:10,668 Sorry, what? 321 00:12:10,710 --> 00:12:12,420 It's just that you tend to procrastinate. 322 00:12:12,461 --> 00:12:14,588 -You have to get him here for the holidays. -(line ringing) 323 00:12:14,630 --> 00:12:15,881 -No, I'm not... -(ringing stops) 324 00:12:15,923 --> 00:12:17,299 No, I'm not gonna call him right now. 325 00:12:17,341 --> 00:12:18,759 -Daddy, can't never could. -No. -(line ringing) 326 00:12:18,801 --> 00:12:20,136 Did you two have a fight or something? 327 00:12:20,177 --> 00:12:21,929 -No. -But you're mad at him? 328 00:12:21,971 --> 00:12:24,223 -Stop that. It's complicated. -(ringing stops) 329 00:12:24,265 --> 00:12:26,350 -Why? Do you need help using your phone? -(line ringing) 330 00:12:26,392 --> 00:12:28,102 -No, I don't need help using my... -(ringing stops) 331 00:12:28,144 --> 00:12:29,645 -Okay. What's the problem? -(sighs) -(line ringing) 332 00:12:29,687 --> 00:12:31,147 What's the issue? Talk to me. 333 00:12:31,188 --> 00:12:32,898 -There's no point, okay? -(ringing stops) 334 00:12:32,940 --> 00:12:34,942 I call him. I invite him. He never shows up. 335 00:12:34,984 --> 00:12:36,944 He's always got a work meeting or a business trip 336 00:12:36,986 --> 00:12:38,612 or a conference call. 337 00:12:38,654 --> 00:12:40,489 All he cares about is work. 338 00:12:40,531 --> 00:12:44,452 But after a while, you... you just stop trying. 339 00:12:44,493 --> 00:12:46,662 -He's still your brother. -(line ringing) 340 00:12:46,704 --> 00:12:48,956 You were partners. 341 00:12:48,998 --> 00:12:50,708 -Yeah, I guess sometimes you just... -(ringing stops) 342 00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:54,837 you grow up and grow apart. 343 00:12:56,630 --> 00:12:57,923 -(line ringing) -(gasps) 344 00:12:57,965 --> 00:12:59,592 Daddy, don't say no. 345 00:12:59,633 --> 00:13:01,010 What if everybody said no? 346 00:13:01,052 --> 00:13:02,178 Nothing would happen. 347 00:13:02,219 --> 00:13:03,596 Nothing would get off the ground. 348 00:13:03,637 --> 00:13:04,930 You got to wake up every day 349 00:13:04,972 --> 00:13:06,724 and you got to say, "Yes, yes, yes!" 350 00:13:06,766 --> 00:13:10,144 Surprise me. Say yes. 351 00:13:10,186 --> 00:13:11,312 (sighs) 352 00:13:11,353 --> 00:13:12,188 (ringing stops) 353 00:13:12,229 --> 00:13:14,815 This is really disappointing. 354 00:13:14,857 --> 00:13:17,109 -And now I'm getting mad! -It's late. 355 00:13:17,151 --> 00:13:19,195 We can work on this tomorrow, okay? 356 00:13:19,236 --> 00:13:20,905 -(grunts) -(toy squeaks) 357 00:13:20,946 --> 00:13:23,824 Oh. Whoopsie. Your little horsey fell off. 358 00:13:23,866 --> 00:13:26,369 Another day won't hurt, right? 359 00:13:27,370 --> 00:13:28,871 Good night, sweetie. 360 00:13:28,913 --> 00:13:30,623 -(door closes) -(scoffs) 361 00:13:31,957 --> 00:13:33,209 (tape rewinding) 362 00:13:33,250 --> 00:13:34,668 TIM (recorded): Good night, sweetie. 363 00:13:34,710 --> 00:13:36,504 -...horsey fell off. -(rewinding) 364 00:13:36,545 --> 00:13:38,172 Tabitha? 365 00:13:41,384 --> 00:13:43,427 * * 366 00:13:50,893 --> 00:13:53,020 (low rumbling, objects rattling) 367 00:13:55,356 --> 00:13:56,524 Huh? 368 00:13:56,565 --> 00:13:58,401 (gasps, squeals) 369 00:14:12,415 --> 00:14:14,458 * * 370 00:14:25,845 --> 00:14:27,430 Uh, don't worry. I got it. 371 00:14:27,471 --> 00:14:29,306 -(Tim yells, groans) -Where is she? Where is she? 372 00:14:29,348 --> 00:14:31,058 -Where's who? What? -I came as fast as I could. 373 00:14:31,100 --> 00:14:32,601 -Ted? -I canceled all my meetings. 374 00:14:32,643 --> 00:14:34,562 What are you doing here? (grunts) Why are you yelling? 375 00:14:34,603 --> 00:14:35,813 -Where's Tabitha? -Tabitha? 376 00:14:35,855 --> 00:14:37,231 -Where is she, Tim? -CAROL: Ted. 377 00:14:37,273 --> 00:14:38,899 Uncle Ted, you're here! You're really here. 378 00:14:38,941 --> 00:14:40,484 -Which arm is it? Left or right? -Huh? 379 00:14:40,526 --> 00:14:42,403 -Is it your fibula? Talk to me. -Whoa. 380 00:14:42,445 --> 00:14:44,071 -Good dilation. Open up. -(groans) 381 00:14:44,113 --> 00:14:45,990 -Say, "Ah." Are you okay? -Wh-What are you doing? 382 00:14:46,032 --> 00:14:47,283 -You look okay. -Whoa. 383 00:14:47,324 --> 00:14:49,076 Don't worry. I'm fine, Uncle Ted. 384 00:14:49,118 --> 00:14:51,412 -That's my girl. -Woo-hoo. 385 00:14:51,454 --> 00:14:53,039 Uh, wh-what brings you into town? 386 00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:54,415 Well, Tabitha fell off her pony. 387 00:14:54,457 --> 00:14:56,250 -She did? -She did? 388 00:14:56,292 --> 00:14:57,251 I did? 389 00:14:57,293 --> 00:14:59,420 -Tim left me a voice mail. -He did? 390 00:14:59,462 --> 00:15:00,963 -I did? -You did. 391 00:15:01,005 --> 00:15:02,882 TIM (cobbled from recording): Hello. This is your brother. 392 00:15:02,923 --> 00:15:04,592 Help. Tabitha fell off horsey. 393 00:15:04,633 --> 00:15:05,843 Good night, sweetie. 394 00:15:05,885 --> 00:15:07,511 Well, that was unsettling. 395 00:15:08,596 --> 00:15:11,098 I swear I didn't leave that message. 396 00:15:11,140 --> 00:15:14,185 -(coos) -On... purpose. 397 00:15:14,226 --> 00:15:15,311 I... 398 00:15:15,352 --> 00:15:16,312 Butt-dialed? 399 00:15:16,353 --> 00:15:17,813 (chuckles) With my butt. 400 00:15:17,855 --> 00:15:19,190 While I was talking in my sleep. 401 00:15:19,231 --> 00:15:20,775 I do that sometimes. 402 00:15:20,816 --> 00:15:22,401 You sleep-butt-dialed me? 403 00:15:22,443 --> 00:15:25,488 -With my butt. -(Carol chuckling) 404 00:15:25,529 --> 00:15:28,908 I knew there must be a perfectly logical explanation. 405 00:15:28,949 --> 00:15:30,701 (chuckles) And there it is. 406 00:15:30,743 --> 00:15:32,620 -TED: Hmm. -All that matters is that you're here. 407 00:15:32,661 --> 00:15:34,830 -TABITHA: Woo-hoo! Yay! -(Tina squeals) 408 00:15:34,872 --> 00:15:36,290 -Absolutely. Uh, for now. -(Tina giggling) 409 00:15:36,332 --> 00:15:38,292 Uncle Ted, please stay for Christmas. Please. 410 00:15:38,334 --> 00:15:40,961 Sorry, sweetie. I can't do Christmas on the 25th. 411 00:15:41,003 --> 00:15:43,214 But, Uncle Ted, I missed you so much. 412 00:15:43,255 --> 00:15:44,965 (echoing): I missed you so much. 413 00:15:45,007 --> 00:15:46,634 -I missed you so much. -Mm... wah! 414 00:15:46,675 --> 00:15:48,594 TABITHA: Don't you think I'm a little old for that now? 415 00:15:48,636 --> 00:15:50,304 (echoing): Don't you think I'm a little old for that now? 416 00:15:50,346 --> 00:15:51,972 Don't you think I'm a little old for that now? 417 00:15:52,014 --> 00:15:54,016 (chuckles) Can I talk to you in the kitchen? 418 00:15:54,850 --> 00:15:56,394 Alone. 419 00:15:58,145 --> 00:16:00,398 -TED: The baby, Tim? -(shushes) 420 00:16:00,439 --> 00:16:03,067 She's been sent from up there. 421 00:16:03,109 --> 00:16:05,736 -Upstairs? -That's right. BabyCorp. 422 00:16:05,778 --> 00:16:09,281 So you're saying the voice mail was some kind of call for help. 423 00:16:09,323 --> 00:16:11,283 Yes! No. 424 00:16:11,325 --> 00:16:14,203 She comes from a secret corporation run by babies. 425 00:16:15,329 --> 00:16:18,165 Tim, I'm gonna give you the name of a doctor. 426 00:16:18,207 --> 00:16:22,002 Roy Federman. Just tell him I sent you, okay? 427 00:16:22,044 --> 00:16:23,254 (hushed): What are they saying? 428 00:16:23,295 --> 00:16:24,755 We should give them some privacy. 429 00:16:24,797 --> 00:16:26,048 -Here you go. -Ooh. Thanks. 430 00:16:26,090 --> 00:16:27,383 TIM: I'm not crazy! 431 00:16:27,425 --> 00:16:29,135 You just don't remember. Tell him, Tina. 432 00:16:29,176 --> 00:16:30,469 -He... I... -TED: She can't talk, Tim. 433 00:16:30,511 --> 00:16:32,179 -TIM: Stop interrupting. -(Tina groans) 434 00:16:32,221 --> 00:16:33,514 TED: Interrupting what? I don't hear anything. 435 00:16:33,556 --> 00:16:35,683 Except your obnoxious voice. You hear that. 436 00:16:35,725 --> 00:16:37,852 I have a beautiful voice. 437 00:16:37,893 --> 00:16:39,270 -(groans) -TIM: Fine. 438 00:16:39,311 --> 00:16:41,147 I can prove that everything I'm saying is real. 439 00:16:41,188 --> 00:16:42,523 -TED: Oh, yeah? -TIM: Yeah! 440 00:16:42,565 --> 00:16:43,524 Suck it, Ted. 441 00:16:43,566 --> 00:16:44,567 I beg your pardon? 442 00:16:44,608 --> 00:16:45,693 You, suck. 443 00:16:45,735 --> 00:16:47,153 No, no, Tim. You suck. 444 00:16:47,194 --> 00:16:48,529 CAROL: Time to go buy a Christmas tree. 445 00:16:48,571 --> 00:16:50,239 But we already have a Christmas tree. 446 00:16:50,281 --> 00:16:52,450 -No, we don't. No, we don't. -Yes, we do. Yes, we do. 447 00:16:52,491 --> 00:16:54,035 Suck it, suck it, suck it, suck it, suck it, suck it. 448 00:16:54,076 --> 00:16:55,578 -Get that pacie out of my face! -Excuse me. 449 00:16:55,619 --> 00:16:58,706 I hate to interrupt, but may I make a suggestion? 450 00:16:58,748 --> 00:17:00,082 Why don't you both suck it? 451 00:17:00,124 --> 00:17:02,043 -Ha! (whoops) -(grunts) 452 00:17:02,084 --> 00:17:03,836 (grunting) 453 00:17:03,878 --> 00:17:05,838 -She can talk. -A lot. 454 00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:07,006 (whoops) 455 00:17:07,048 --> 00:17:08,632 Buckle up, boys. 456 00:17:08,674 --> 00:17:10,259 (sucking rapidly) 457 00:17:11,093 --> 00:17:12,553 (all screaming) 458 00:17:12,595 --> 00:17:14,889 -TINA: Baby on board! -(Tim whooping) 459 00:17:14,930 --> 00:17:17,099 -That's what I'm talking about! -(laughs) Woo-hoo! 460 00:17:17,141 --> 00:17:19,518 (screaming) 461 00:17:20,895 --> 00:17:22,063 (sighs) 462 00:17:22,104 --> 00:17:24,607 * * 463 00:17:31,906 --> 00:17:33,616 TIM: Yeah! Woo-hoo! 464 00:17:34,784 --> 00:17:36,077 (both grunt) 465 00:17:36,118 --> 00:17:37,745 (yelps) 466 00:17:37,787 --> 00:17:39,789 -Wow. -(Tina laughs) 467 00:17:39,830 --> 00:17:41,415 (gasps) 468 00:17:41,457 --> 00:17:42,750 I'm home. 469 00:17:42,792 --> 00:17:44,043 TIM: Yeah. See? 470 00:17:44,085 --> 00:17:45,503 It's all real. 471 00:17:45,544 --> 00:17:46,587 TED: Whoa. 472 00:17:46,629 --> 00:17:48,756 Is that me? 473 00:17:48,798 --> 00:17:51,509 TINA: If you're fishing for a compliment, you caught one! 474 00:17:51,550 --> 00:17:53,928 You are a legend in this joint. 475 00:17:53,969 --> 00:17:55,429 A statue? 476 00:17:55,471 --> 00:17:57,973 Well, I did single-handedly save the company. 477 00:17:58,015 --> 00:17:59,517 Double-handedly. 478 00:17:59,558 --> 00:18:00,935 (chuckling): Right? We were partners. 479 00:18:00,976 --> 00:18:02,061 Really? 480 00:18:02,103 --> 00:18:03,771 I don't see your statue. 481 00:18:03,813 --> 00:18:05,398 I still love you, Daddy. 482 00:18:05,439 --> 00:18:07,400 TIM: They got the head size right. 483 00:18:07,441 --> 00:18:08,693 (ding) 484 00:18:08,734 --> 00:18:10,945 TED: Take it from me, you have to be aggressive 485 00:18:10,986 --> 00:18:12,238 if you want to get ahead. 486 00:18:12,279 --> 00:18:13,948 Climb that corporate ladder 487 00:18:13,989 --> 00:18:16,617 -until you're the last baby standing at the top. -TIM: Wow. 488 00:18:16,659 --> 00:18:19,578 Actually, I prioritize a good work-life balance 489 00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:23,124 and a positive environment where my ideas are valued. 490 00:18:23,165 --> 00:18:25,292 (laughing) 491 00:18:25,334 --> 00:18:26,669 Oh, you're serious. 492 00:18:26,711 --> 00:18:28,546 You're funny, Uncle Ted. 493 00:18:28,587 --> 00:18:30,798 I wonder why they didn't mention that in your file. 494 00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:31,966 My file? 495 00:18:32,007 --> 00:18:33,509 -You saw my file? -(Tim sighs) 496 00:18:33,551 --> 00:18:34,802 -Yep. -What does it say? 497 00:18:34,844 --> 00:18:36,137 It says a lot. 498 00:18:36,178 --> 00:18:38,556 -This is the Crisis Center. -Whoa. Wow. 499 00:18:38,597 --> 00:18:41,058 This is where we monitor all threats 500 00:18:41,100 --> 00:18:43,060 to babies around the world. 501 00:18:43,102 --> 00:18:44,353 And Hawaii. 502 00:18:44,395 --> 00:18:46,147 This is so cool. This is so cool. 503 00:18:46,188 --> 00:18:48,149 (roaring): I'm Godzilla. 504 00:18:48,190 --> 00:18:49,692 "Oh, run for your lives! Run for your lives!" 505 00:18:49,734 --> 00:18:52,069 -Why did we bring him? -Daddy, get down from there. 506 00:18:52,111 --> 00:18:54,822 -Aw. -We can play on it later when no one is looking. 507 00:18:54,864 --> 00:18:56,532 -What's the crisis? -Yeah. 508 00:18:56,574 --> 00:18:58,159 Here we go. What's the crisis, sweetie? 509 00:18:58,200 --> 00:18:59,577 Rusty, roll it. 510 00:18:59,618 --> 00:19:01,495 (snores, whines) 511 00:19:01,537 --> 00:19:03,497 He's new. 512 00:19:03,539 --> 00:19:07,334 DR. ARMSTRONG (over speakers): Just imagine, baby surgeons. 513 00:19:07,376 --> 00:19:09,670 -(buzzer sounds) -Uh-oh. -(babies giggling) 514 00:19:09,712 --> 00:19:12,006 Or baby astronauts. 515 00:19:12,048 --> 00:19:15,176 (singsongy): Floaty, floaty, float. 516 00:19:15,217 --> 00:19:18,512 Yes, babies are gonna run the world one day. 517 00:19:18,554 --> 00:19:21,766 And that day is coming sooner than you think. 518 00:19:21,807 --> 00:19:24,769 Hello. My name is Dr. Erwin Armstrong, 519 00:19:24,810 --> 00:19:27,355 founder of The Acorn Center for Advanced Childhood. 520 00:19:27,396 --> 00:19:29,315 Wait a minute, that's... that's Tabitha's school. 521 00:19:29,357 --> 00:19:31,692 Here at the center, we believe babies 522 00:19:31,734 --> 00:19:34,320 are the ultimate learning machines. 523 00:19:34,362 --> 00:19:36,280 Isn't that right, little Nathan? 524 00:19:36,322 --> 00:19:38,449 -Yeah! -(chuckles): Okay. 525 00:19:38,491 --> 00:19:40,034 They should use their precious time 526 00:19:40,076 --> 00:19:42,495 to develop faster, push harder. 527 00:19:42,536 --> 00:19:43,913 -Hmm. -(Tim scoffs) -Parents, they have the best 528 00:19:43,954 --> 00:19:46,874 intentions, of course, but they're not experts. 529 00:19:46,916 --> 00:19:51,003 After all, the only thing holding your child back is... 530 00:19:51,045 --> 00:19:52,797 -you. -KIDS: You! 531 00:19:52,838 --> 00:19:55,508 This explains why Tabitha's been pulling away from me. 532 00:19:55,549 --> 00:19:57,426 -It's the school. -ARMSTRONG: Everybody, wave. 533 00:19:57,468 --> 00:19:59,011 -Bye, Mommy. -KIDS: Bye, Mommy! 534 00:19:59,053 --> 00:20:00,262 -Bye, Daddy. -Bye, Daddy! 535 00:20:00,304 --> 00:20:02,890 (singsongy): Sayonara. 536 00:20:02,932 --> 00:20:04,975 Now, in the past six months, 537 00:20:05,017 --> 00:20:07,978 these schools have been popping up all over the world. 538 00:20:08,020 --> 00:20:09,230 Uh, so what's the problem? 539 00:20:09,271 --> 00:20:10,898 The school is the problem. 540 00:20:10,940 --> 00:20:12,358 Yeah. School is evil. 541 00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,568 No, Daddy, not all schools are evil. 542 00:20:14,610 --> 00:20:16,696 -It's just this one, okay? -Okay. 543 00:20:16,737 --> 00:20:18,823 If Armstrong's philosophy keeps spreading, 544 00:20:18,864 --> 00:20:20,991 it could be the end of childhood. 545 00:20:21,033 --> 00:20:22,451 No. 546 00:20:22,493 --> 00:20:24,787 Childhood was the worst three years of my life. 547 00:20:24,829 --> 00:20:26,372 That's so sad. 548 00:20:26,414 --> 00:20:28,249 You probably just didn't do it right. 549 00:20:28,290 --> 00:20:29,542 -Huh? -Aw. 550 00:20:29,583 --> 00:20:31,794 But luckily, you get a do-over. 551 00:20:31,836 --> 00:20:34,004 A second chance. 552 00:20:35,172 --> 00:20:38,676 BabyCorp has developed a new super-duper baby formula 553 00:20:38,718 --> 00:20:41,595 -that can turn a grown-up back into a baby. -(baby coos) 554 00:20:41,637 --> 00:20:43,931 We have it in cherry, grape, orange and lime. 555 00:20:43,973 --> 00:20:45,725 -For real? -Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 556 00:20:45,766 --> 00:20:47,685 -You want me to be a baby? -Hey, it's what you do best. 557 00:20:47,727 --> 00:20:49,812 So you can infiltrate the school and find out 558 00:20:49,854 --> 00:20:52,523 what Dr. Armstrong is really up to. 559 00:20:52,565 --> 00:20:55,109 BabyCorp will take care of the rest. 560 00:20:55,151 --> 00:20:56,944 (whoops) 561 00:20:56,986 --> 00:20:58,612 (Tim gasps, laughs) 562 00:20:58,654 --> 00:21:00,614 It's the perfect disguise. 563 00:21:00,656 --> 00:21:03,576 And it only lasts 48 teensy-weensy hours. 564 00:21:03,617 --> 00:21:05,369 Oh, I am in on the mission. 565 00:21:05,411 --> 00:21:06,537 -Sorry, Pops. -Ow. 566 00:21:06,579 --> 00:21:08,414 -It's not your mission. -Aw. 567 00:21:08,456 --> 00:21:10,458 "Warning: may cause drooling, babbling, 568 00:21:10,499 --> 00:21:12,293 "emotional outbursts, fits of laughter, 569 00:21:12,334 --> 00:21:16,297 loss of bowel control, chubby thighs"? 570 00:21:16,338 --> 00:21:19,133 I think some guys at my gym take this stuff. 571 00:21:19,175 --> 00:21:20,259 (screams) 572 00:21:20,301 --> 00:21:22,053 My texting hand! 573 00:21:22,094 --> 00:21:24,388 -Even though it is your daughter's school. -(screaming) 574 00:21:24,430 --> 00:21:25,890 Doesn't seem fair, does it? 575 00:21:25,931 --> 00:21:27,391 Daddy, no. Please stop. 576 00:21:27,433 --> 00:21:28,809 (glugs) Whoa! 577 00:21:28,851 --> 00:21:30,519 (babbling rapidly) 578 00:21:30,561 --> 00:21:32,438 What? It actually works. 579 00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:33,647 (Ted straining) 580 00:21:33,689 --> 00:21:35,483 -TED: It's mine! -(yells) 581 00:21:35,524 --> 00:21:37,318 -I'm better with this kind of thing! -Oh! 582 00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:38,861 (glugs, screams) 583 00:21:38,903 --> 00:21:41,155 And what kind of thing is that, Flock of Seagulls? 584 00:21:41,197 --> 00:21:42,990 -(both grunting) -(record scratches) 585 00:21:43,032 --> 00:21:45,284 ("The Time Warp" from Rocky Horror Picture Showplaying) 586 00:21:45,326 --> 00:21:46,827 -Everything! -Gotcha! 587 00:21:46,869 --> 00:21:49,663 You might feel very emotional, have some mood swings. 588 00:21:49,705 --> 00:21:50,956 -(glugging) -(Ted yells) 589 00:21:50,998 --> 00:21:52,208 Oh! (babbles) 590 00:21:52,249 --> 00:21:53,751 Hey! (screams) 591 00:21:53,793 --> 00:21:56,045 Ouch. There's the awkward stage. 592 00:21:56,087 --> 00:21:57,671 Now, the tea's hot, Connie. 593 00:21:57,713 --> 00:21:59,673 You always have to be the hero, don't you? 594 00:21:59,715 --> 00:22:01,592 What's that supposed to mean? (grunts) 595 00:22:01,634 --> 00:22:03,844 Never see him... (frightened whimpering) 596 00:22:03,886 --> 00:22:05,846 All of a sudden, he shows up with a pony. 597 00:22:05,888 --> 00:22:09,100 (screams) You're just jealous, helmet head. 598 00:22:09,141 --> 00:22:10,518 She's my daughter! 599 00:22:10,559 --> 00:22:12,186 She's my niece. (screams) 600 00:22:12,228 --> 00:22:14,188 -(grunts) -Do you want cream or sugar? 601 00:22:14,230 --> 00:22:15,731 (both yelling) 602 00:22:15,773 --> 00:22:17,733 I was always the successful one. 603 00:22:17,775 --> 00:22:20,361 Mommy says no running in the house. 604 00:22:20,403 --> 00:22:21,612 (slurps) Mm. 605 00:22:21,654 --> 00:22:23,864 Hand over the bottle, mullet. 606 00:22:23,906 --> 00:22:25,658 (grunting) 607 00:22:25,700 --> 00:22:28,035 -(screams) -You can't hug money, you know. 608 00:22:28,077 --> 00:22:29,328 (glugs, babbles) 609 00:22:29,370 --> 00:22:30,746 (grunts) 610 00:22:31,706 --> 00:22:34,166 But you can, Tim. You can. 611 00:22:34,208 --> 00:22:37,169 (both yelling) 612 00:22:37,211 --> 00:22:39,088 Men. Am I right? 613 00:22:39,130 --> 00:22:42,133 (both yelling, grunting) 614 00:22:42,174 --> 00:22:44,051 (glugging) 615 00:22:44,093 --> 00:22:46,137 (slow-motion yelling) 616 00:22:46,178 --> 00:22:48,264 (screams, grunts) 617 00:22:48,305 --> 00:22:49,974 It's not personal. 618 00:22:50,015 --> 00:22:51,809 It's business, Leslie. 619 00:22:51,851 --> 00:22:52,893 (grunts) 620 00:22:52,935 --> 00:22:54,937 Well, it's personal to me, Lindsey. 621 00:22:54,979 --> 00:22:57,606 (both scream) 622 00:22:57,648 --> 00:23:01,027 (both whimpering) 623 00:23:01,068 --> 00:23:02,903 Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! Ow, ow, ow! 624 00:23:02,945 --> 00:23:04,780 I'm sorry, Connie. I have to cut this short. 625 00:23:04,822 --> 00:23:06,907 Tomorrow, we'll talk about your problems. 626 00:23:06,949 --> 00:23:09,660 Okay, time-out! This has gone far enough! 627 00:23:09,702 --> 00:23:11,245 TABITHA: Hey. We're home. 628 00:23:11,287 --> 00:23:12,788 (grunts) And we got another tree. 629 00:23:12,830 --> 00:23:14,040 A real one. 630 00:23:14,081 --> 00:23:15,082 (all gasp) 631 00:23:15,124 --> 00:23:16,500 Um, upstairs now. 632 00:23:16,542 --> 00:23:17,918 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. 633 00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:19,378 -(both grunting) -CAROL: Push it. No, no, pull. 634 00:23:19,420 --> 00:23:20,504 -Go, go, go, go, go. -Push it up. 635 00:23:20,546 --> 00:23:22,089 -(grunts, whoops) -Pull. No, okay. 636 00:23:22,131 --> 00:23:24,175 -To the right. -How come I have the heavy end? 637 00:23:24,216 --> 00:23:26,093 CAROL: Because you're young and strong, honey. 638 00:23:26,135 --> 00:23:27,470 Little bit more. 639 00:23:27,511 --> 00:23:28,637 -Me first! -(grunts) 640 00:23:28,679 --> 00:23:29,930 -CAROL: Come on. -Get off. 641 00:23:29,972 --> 00:23:31,766 -Tim? Ted? -Mom. 642 00:23:31,807 --> 00:23:33,142 Get the cord. Get the cord. 643 00:23:33,184 --> 00:23:34,435 Get the cord, get the cord, get the cord! 644 00:23:34,477 --> 00:23:36,145 You just can't disappear. 645 00:23:36,187 --> 00:23:37,480 You need a cover story. 646 00:23:37,521 --> 00:23:38,981 -TED: Ow! -Oh, right. 647 00:23:39,023 --> 00:23:40,107 My soft spot. 648 00:23:40,149 --> 00:23:41,275 CAROL: Where are you guys? 649 00:23:41,317 --> 00:23:42,485 Uh, uh, tell her you're packing. 650 00:23:42,526 --> 00:23:45,321 We're upstairs, uh, packing. 651 00:23:45,363 --> 00:23:46,781 -Packing? For what? -(Tabitha yells) 652 00:23:46,822 --> 00:23:48,532 Ooh. You're going on a brother bonding trip. 653 00:23:48,574 --> 00:23:51,118 -We're going on a brother bonding trip. -Ow! 654 00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:52,745 Now? 655 00:23:52,787 --> 00:23:54,413 But, Tim, your parents are coming tomorrow. 656 00:23:54,455 --> 00:23:56,123 They can help out. 657 00:23:56,165 --> 00:23:58,000 Yeah, they could help out. 658 00:23:58,042 --> 00:24:00,920 What... No, you can't leave me alone with your parents. 659 00:24:00,961 --> 00:24:02,588 -(Tina yells, laughs) -Oh, Tina! 660 00:24:02,630 --> 00:24:05,257 (grunts) What are you doing? 661 00:24:05,299 --> 00:24:06,759 (both grunting) 662 00:24:06,801 --> 00:24:08,969 All right, you know what? You're going to baby jail. 663 00:24:09,011 --> 00:24:10,805 -Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! -Tabitha! 664 00:24:10,846 --> 00:24:12,306 -CAROL: Oh, honey, I'm sorry. -TABITHA: A little help here. 665 00:24:12,348 --> 00:24:13,766 CAROL: Honey, hold it up. Hold it up. 666 00:24:13,808 --> 00:24:15,476 (deep voice): This is Ted Templeton, a man. 667 00:24:15,518 --> 00:24:17,186 You can go ahead and take off. I have urgent family business. 668 00:24:17,228 --> 00:24:19,397 -CAROL: To the right, honey. -Yes, I have a family. 669 00:24:19,438 --> 00:24:21,315 -Tim, I'm coming up there. -(Tina gasps) 670 00:24:21,357 --> 00:24:23,275 Yeah, we need to talk. 671 00:24:23,317 --> 00:24:24,944 TABITHA: Hey, Mom? 672 00:24:24,985 --> 00:24:26,153 Oh! Tina! 673 00:24:26,195 --> 00:24:27,571 (squeals, laughs) 674 00:24:27,613 --> 00:24:29,615 Put that down. Put that down. Put that down. 675 00:24:29,657 --> 00:24:30,991 -Put that down. Put that down. -Tina! 676 00:24:31,033 --> 00:24:33,828 -Put that down! Get back here! -(laughing) 677 00:24:33,869 --> 00:24:36,330 Tina, stop! (grunting) 678 00:24:36,372 --> 00:24:38,457 CAROL: What has gotten into you? 679 00:24:38,499 --> 00:24:40,167 -Time for us to go! -(grunts) 680 00:24:40,209 --> 00:24:41,669 -What? Now? -TED: Yeah. 681 00:24:41,711 --> 00:24:44,547 -My helicopter's double-parked. -Bye! 682 00:24:44,588 --> 00:24:46,716 -Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So soon? -Oh, no. 683 00:24:46,757 --> 00:24:48,843 -(both scream) -(wind whistling) 684 00:24:48,884 --> 00:24:51,721 -(helicopter whirring) -(panting) 685 00:24:53,139 --> 00:24:54,890 What... Did they really just leave? 686 00:24:54,932 --> 00:24:56,016 Yep. 687 00:24:56,058 --> 00:24:57,893 -Hide! -(Ted and Tim whimpering) 688 00:24:57,935 --> 00:25:00,938 (groans) I got to lose this baby fat. 689 00:25:00,980 --> 00:25:02,565 (Carol sighs) 690 00:25:02,606 --> 00:25:04,692 Tina! What is your problem? 691 00:25:04,734 --> 00:25:06,861 (Tina laughing) 692 00:25:06,902 --> 00:25:08,946 * * 693 00:25:10,698 --> 00:25:12,450 CAROL: Now, you're gonna wake up tomorrow 694 00:25:12,491 --> 00:25:14,076 and be good, Tina. 695 00:25:14,118 --> 00:25:15,411 No more devil baby. 696 00:25:15,453 --> 00:25:16,704 Deal? 697 00:25:16,746 --> 00:25:19,040 -(coos) -Okay. 698 00:25:21,167 --> 00:25:23,085 (both gasping for air) 699 00:25:23,127 --> 00:25:24,253 (both scream) 700 00:25:24,295 --> 00:25:25,504 Ew. 701 00:25:25,546 --> 00:25:26,964 (both scream) 702 00:25:27,006 --> 00:25:29,216 -(chiming) -Thanks so much for coming in, ladies. 703 00:25:29,258 --> 00:25:30,551 Would you like some fruit? 704 00:25:30,593 --> 00:25:31,594 Mm. Ow! 705 00:25:31,635 --> 00:25:32,595 What was... Hey! 706 00:25:32,636 --> 00:25:34,180 Uh, can we get on with this? 707 00:25:34,221 --> 00:25:36,390 (grunts, groans) 708 00:25:36,432 --> 00:25:38,059 I miss my teeth. 709 00:25:38,100 --> 00:25:40,102 I've decided who's going on the mission. 710 00:25:40,144 --> 00:25:41,353 Thank you. I accept. 711 00:25:41,395 --> 00:25:42,438 Both of you. 712 00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:43,981 -Yes! -No. 713 00:25:44,023 --> 00:25:45,733 BabyCorp wants to get the team back together, huh? 714 00:25:45,775 --> 00:25:46,859 (laughs): No. 715 00:25:46,901 --> 00:25:48,235 They think that's a terrible idea. 716 00:25:48,277 --> 00:25:49,403 Of course they do. 717 00:25:49,445 --> 00:25:51,238 Well, I'm the boss, applesauce. 718 00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:54,241 And I think you two are better together than you are apart. 719 00:25:54,283 --> 00:25:57,536 Well, I work alone-- or at least not with him. 720 00:25:57,578 --> 00:25:59,580 Hey. There's no "I" in "team." 721 00:25:59,622 --> 00:26:01,582 Actually, there's no "U" in "team," either, 722 00:26:01,624 --> 00:26:03,793 -but there is an "M-E." -T-E-A-M... 723 00:26:03,834 --> 00:26:05,753 But teamwork doesn't seem work. 724 00:26:05,795 --> 00:26:08,130 Ah. If you want something done right, do it yourself. 725 00:26:08,172 --> 00:26:10,674 -We're all in it together. -Every man for himself. 726 00:26:10,716 --> 00:26:12,426 One is the loneliest number. 727 00:26:12,468 --> 00:26:14,303 -The ayes have it. -We the people! 728 00:26:14,345 --> 00:26:16,180 Aha! 729 00:26:17,473 --> 00:26:18,766 Oh. So sorry. 730 00:26:18,808 --> 00:26:20,184 (whispers): Okay. Good night. 731 00:26:20,226 --> 00:26:21,602 Whew. 732 00:26:21,644 --> 00:26:23,729 Guess we'll just have to melt down your big old statue 733 00:26:23,771 --> 00:26:25,606 and turn it into participation trophies. 734 00:26:25,648 --> 00:26:27,441 Please, no, don't hurt my statue. 735 00:26:27,483 --> 00:26:30,528 Now, we have secret intel 736 00:26:30,569 --> 00:26:35,658 that Dr. Armstrong leaves his office every morning at 11:15. 737 00:26:35,700 --> 00:26:37,159 You need to sneak in there, 738 00:26:37,201 --> 00:26:39,412 plant these surveillance devices, 739 00:26:39,453 --> 00:26:41,455 and report back to me. 740 00:26:41,497 --> 00:26:42,581 Oh, man, this is so cool. 741 00:26:42,623 --> 00:26:43,749 (echoing over speaker): Testing. 742 00:26:43,791 --> 00:26:45,126 * Strangers in the night... * 743 00:26:45,167 --> 00:26:47,628 Now, I've arranged for a school bus 744 00:26:47,670 --> 00:26:49,964 to be here at 8:00 a.m. sharp! 745 00:26:50,005 --> 00:26:51,590 -Thank you, Connie. -CONNIE: Nighty night. 746 00:26:51,632 --> 00:26:53,092 Do not be late. 747 00:26:53,134 --> 00:26:54,343 Got it. 748 00:26:54,385 --> 00:26:56,303 Easy-breezy, taco-peasy, boys. 749 00:26:56,345 --> 00:26:58,180 Let's get some sleep! 750 00:26:58,222 --> 00:27:00,141 (snoring) 751 00:27:04,311 --> 00:27:06,355 (coos softly) 752 00:27:08,482 --> 00:27:10,735 * * 753 00:27:20,036 --> 00:27:22,204 CAROL: Hey, what's the matter? 754 00:27:23,706 --> 00:27:24,957 TABITHA: It's nothing. 755 00:27:24,999 --> 00:27:26,333 CAROL: Oh, sweetie, don't worry. 756 00:27:26,375 --> 00:27:27,668 I'm sure your dad will be back 757 00:27:27,710 --> 00:27:29,336 in time to see you in the pageant. 758 00:27:29,378 --> 00:27:30,713 TABITHA: That's okay. 759 00:27:30,755 --> 00:27:32,089 CAROL: What? Don't you want him to come? 760 00:27:32,131 --> 00:27:34,675 -TABITHA: I guess. -CAROL: Of course you do. 761 00:27:34,717 --> 00:27:36,635 Now, go back to sleep. 762 00:27:36,677 --> 00:27:38,054 TABITHA: Good night, Mom. 763 00:27:38,095 --> 00:27:40,389 CAROL: Good night, sweetie. 764 00:27:47,897 --> 00:27:49,940 (coos softly) 765 00:27:53,486 --> 00:27:55,738 * * 766 00:27:59,742 --> 00:28:01,202 CAROL: Don't you want him to come? 767 00:28:01,243 --> 00:28:03,120 -TABITHA: I guess. -(gasping) 768 00:28:03,162 --> 00:28:04,413 (screams) 769 00:28:04,455 --> 00:28:06,791 Don't you think I'm a little old for that now? 770 00:28:06,832 --> 00:28:09,543 I think it's time we both grow up. 771 00:28:09,585 --> 00:28:11,128 -(grunts) -(thunder crashes) 772 00:28:11,170 --> 00:28:12,922 (gavel slamming) 773 00:28:14,090 --> 00:28:16,634 The trial of Timothy Leslie Templeton 774 00:28:16,675 --> 00:28:18,052 is now in session. 775 00:28:18,094 --> 00:28:19,428 -Ha! Leslie. -(laughter) 776 00:28:19,470 --> 00:28:21,555 Trial? Wait, what... what are the charges? 777 00:28:21,597 --> 00:28:22,890 Fraud. 778 00:28:22,932 --> 00:28:25,559 Claiming to be the world's best dad. 779 00:28:25,601 --> 00:28:27,019 -But I never said... -Exhibit A. 780 00:28:27,061 --> 00:28:29,230 -Oh, come on. That was a gift. -(gallery gasping) 781 00:28:29,271 --> 00:28:32,274 I suggest you let your attorney do the talking. 782 00:28:32,316 --> 00:28:34,443 (gasps) Oh, no. 783 00:28:34,485 --> 00:28:36,987 Back in my day, you had to earn one of these babies. 784 00:28:37,029 --> 00:28:38,280 -Dad, what? I did not... -(gallery gasping) 785 00:28:38,322 --> 00:28:41,075 His best friend was an alarm clock. 786 00:28:41,117 --> 00:28:41,867 Mom. 787 00:28:41,909 --> 00:28:44,537 (groans) He broke my arm. 788 00:28:44,578 --> 00:28:46,080 No, I didn't! It was my brother. 789 00:28:46,122 --> 00:28:47,248 Objection, Your Honor. 790 00:28:47,289 --> 00:28:48,708 Sustained. 791 00:28:48,749 --> 00:28:50,334 We the jury find the defendant... 792 00:28:50,376 --> 00:28:51,836 ALL: A failure! 793 00:28:51,877 --> 00:28:53,629 Tabitha, will you please help me out? 794 00:28:53,671 --> 00:28:55,005 Whoa! 795 00:28:55,047 --> 00:28:57,425 Dad, the homework, it's just too much. 796 00:28:57,466 --> 00:28:58,592 -Whoa! -Tabitha! 797 00:28:58,634 --> 00:28:59,802 -Time's up. -(alarm ringing) 798 00:28:59,844 --> 00:29:02,388 -Wait. No! -Save me, Daddy! Save me! 799 00:29:02,430 --> 00:29:04,640 (screaming) 800 00:29:04,682 --> 00:29:06,225 (yells, gasps) 801 00:29:06,267 --> 00:29:07,768 (sighs) 802 00:29:07,810 --> 00:29:10,771 -Oh, man. That was crazy. -(snoring) 803 00:29:10,813 --> 00:29:12,648 (both yelling) 804 00:29:12,690 --> 00:29:14,191 -We overslept! We overslept? -(gasping) 805 00:29:14,233 --> 00:29:15,901 -We overslept. -Wake up, little halflings! 806 00:29:15,943 --> 00:29:18,070 -Wake up! What year is it? -(alarm ringing) 807 00:29:18,821 --> 00:29:20,865 Oh, no. 808 00:29:20,906 --> 00:29:22,616 This is bad. No. 809 00:29:22,658 --> 00:29:24,285 No! No. 810 00:29:24,326 --> 00:29:25,619 (yells) Get up. 811 00:29:25,661 --> 00:29:26,954 Get up. We got to go. 812 00:29:26,996 --> 00:29:28,831 Come on. We're gonna be late for... Oh! 813 00:29:28,873 --> 00:29:30,124 I'm gonna email it to you. 814 00:29:30,166 --> 00:29:31,625 (grunts) What's going on? 815 00:29:31,667 --> 00:29:33,919 Ah, I forgot to set Wizzie for daylight savings! 816 00:29:33,961 --> 00:29:36,964 -What?! -Daylight can't be saved, Tim. 817 00:29:37,006 --> 00:29:39,258 Oh, I got to get the plant and the bug we got to plant. 818 00:29:39,300 --> 00:29:41,135 -Grab whatever. We got to go. -Don't panic. Do not panic. 819 00:29:41,177 --> 00:29:42,678 -Ow. (groans) -Godspeed, boys. 820 00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:43,804 Let's roll. 821 00:29:43,846 --> 00:29:46,307 Whoa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa...! 822 00:29:46,348 --> 00:29:48,434 (grunting) 823 00:29:49,769 --> 00:29:51,103 -(Tim screams) -Upsies. 824 00:29:51,145 --> 00:29:53,564 -I need upsies...! -Oh! 825 00:29:53,606 --> 00:29:54,982 -(Ted yells) -TIM: Get dressed. 826 00:29:55,024 --> 00:29:57,735 (both grunting and groaning) 827 00:29:57,777 --> 00:29:59,362 What have you done to me?! 828 00:29:59,403 --> 00:30:01,322 No, really? What, are we going sailing? 829 00:30:01,364 --> 00:30:03,491 Oh, no. No, no, it's leaving. 830 00:30:03,532 --> 00:30:04,825 (both yell) 831 00:30:04,867 --> 00:30:06,744 (grunts, whimpers) 832 00:30:06,786 --> 00:30:08,162 Wait, no, no. Stop! 833 00:30:08,204 --> 00:30:10,331 Stop, stop, stop. Come back! 834 00:30:10,373 --> 00:30:11,499 Ahoy! 835 00:30:11,540 --> 00:30:12,833 Come back! 836 00:30:12,875 --> 00:30:14,585 (panting) 837 00:30:14,627 --> 00:30:16,045 Great, matey. 838 00:30:16,087 --> 00:30:17,630 What are we gonna do now? 839 00:30:18,798 --> 00:30:21,258 (whistling) 840 00:30:21,300 --> 00:30:23,386 * * 841 00:30:26,555 --> 00:30:28,599 (neighing) 842 00:30:33,562 --> 00:30:35,940 (slow-motion): Oh, no! 843 00:30:35,981 --> 00:30:37,942 (continues whistling) 844 00:30:38,734 --> 00:30:39,694 (whinnies) 845 00:30:39,735 --> 00:30:42,363 Precious, my noble steed. 846 00:30:42,405 --> 00:30:45,533 We must not be late for our first day of school. 847 00:30:47,827 --> 00:30:49,662 Oh, gross. 848 00:30:49,704 --> 00:30:51,372 -Huh? -(Tim screaming) 849 00:30:51,414 --> 00:30:53,708 Tallyho, Precious! 850 00:30:53,749 --> 00:30:56,043 (Tim continues screaming) 851 00:30:58,254 --> 00:30:59,839 This pony hates me. Oh! 852 00:30:59,880 --> 00:31:01,298 It's not that she hates you, Tim. 853 00:31:01,340 --> 00:31:02,883 She just doesn't respect you. 854 00:31:02,925 --> 00:31:05,344 (Tim screams, whimpers) 855 00:31:05,386 --> 00:31:07,388 (horns honking) 856 00:31:07,430 --> 00:31:08,764 Go left! Go left! 857 00:31:08,806 --> 00:31:10,725 I'm gonna go where navigation says. 858 00:31:10,766 --> 00:31:11,934 AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn left. 859 00:31:11,976 --> 00:31:13,310 Thank you, navigation. 860 00:31:13,352 --> 00:31:14,937 -TIM: Whoa! -AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn right. 861 00:31:14,979 --> 00:31:16,605 -(people screaming) -TIM: Sorry. 862 00:31:16,647 --> 00:31:19,025 AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn left. Proceed on the current route. 863 00:31:20,443 --> 00:31:22,111 TED: Yeehaw! 864 00:31:22,153 --> 00:31:23,821 AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating. 865 00:31:23,863 --> 00:31:25,656 Hold on to your holster. 866 00:31:25,698 --> 00:31:26,949 -Hyah! -(yells) 867 00:31:26,991 --> 00:31:28,784 (cell phone buzzing) 868 00:31:28,826 --> 00:31:30,786 (grunts) Oh, no. It's Carol! 869 00:31:30,828 --> 00:31:31,912 Don't answer it. 870 00:31:31,954 --> 00:31:33,080 -Hi. -CAROL: Oh, Tim. 871 00:31:33,122 --> 00:31:34,331 How's your bonding trip? 872 00:31:34,373 --> 00:31:36,083 Uh... Whoa! 873 00:31:36,125 --> 00:31:37,418 Whoa. Slow down. 874 00:31:37,460 --> 00:31:40,212 How... is... your... 875 00:31:40,254 --> 00:31:42,131 -bonding trip? -Aah! Whoa. 876 00:31:42,923 --> 00:31:44,759 (screams) You're here! 877 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:46,719 -Oh, no. -TIM: I mean, um, 878 00:31:46,761 --> 00:31:48,095 I wish you were here. 879 00:31:48,137 --> 00:31:49,346 Oh, we miss you, too. 880 00:31:49,388 --> 00:31:50,431 Don't we, girls? 881 00:31:50,473 --> 00:31:51,891 We're, uh... 882 00:31:51,932 --> 00:31:53,434 We're, uh, rebooting our relationship 883 00:31:53,476 --> 00:31:55,519 and, uh, restoring the closeness that we once felt. 884 00:31:55,561 --> 00:31:57,938 -That's so great. -We've got to go. (chuckles) 885 00:31:57,980 --> 00:31:59,148 CAROL: Where are you? 886 00:31:59,190 --> 00:32:00,608 -Uh, a hockey game. -Hey! 887 00:32:00,649 --> 00:32:02,193 He shoots, he scores! 888 00:32:02,234 --> 00:32:03,486 He scores! He scores! 889 00:32:03,527 --> 00:32:05,112 Ladies and gentlemen, he scores! 890 00:32:05,154 --> 00:32:06,697 -* Busted... * -* Busted... * 891 00:32:06,739 --> 00:32:07,865 -* Busted. * -(sirens wail) 892 00:32:07,907 --> 00:32:09,700 Is that the police? 893 00:32:10,785 --> 00:32:12,119 Uh, no, not the police. 894 00:32:12,161 --> 00:32:13,954 It's, uh... it's a hockey alarm. 895 00:32:13,996 --> 00:32:15,164 Faster, Tim. 896 00:32:15,206 --> 00:32:16,916 I ain't going back to the clink! 897 00:32:16,957 --> 00:32:18,376 Now, I just wanted to remind you 898 00:32:18,417 --> 00:32:20,211 that Tabitha's pageant is tomorrow night. 899 00:32:20,252 --> 00:32:22,046 You have to be there. 900 00:32:22,088 --> 00:32:25,800 Uh, I will be there in one shape or another. 901 00:32:25,841 --> 00:32:26,967 (Ted grunts) 902 00:32:27,009 --> 00:32:29,136 -You promise? -I promise. 903 00:32:29,178 --> 00:32:30,554 And what about Ted? 904 00:32:30,596 --> 00:32:31,972 Happy holidays, coppers. 905 00:32:32,014 --> 00:32:34,934 You're never gonna take me alive, see? 906 00:32:34,975 --> 00:32:36,227 Uh, he's busy. 907 00:32:36,268 --> 00:32:37,978 What are you doing? It's the cops. 908 00:32:38,020 --> 00:32:39,480 -(Ted laughs) -Sorry, Officers. 909 00:32:39,522 --> 00:32:41,399 TED: Santa's got something for everybody. 910 00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:42,483 TIM: Sorry. 911 00:32:42,525 --> 00:32:44,610 * * 912 00:32:48,030 --> 00:32:49,156 AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating. 913 00:32:49,198 --> 00:32:50,658 (Tim screams, Ted laughs) 914 00:32:50,700 --> 00:32:52,326 Oh, my God! It's so real! 915 00:32:52,368 --> 00:32:54,328 It's so real! It's so real! 916 00:32:54,370 --> 00:32:55,955 (Tim screaming over phone) 917 00:32:55,996 --> 00:32:57,790 -Tim? -(Tabitha speaks Mandarin) 918 00:32:57,832 --> 00:32:58,958 (people screaming) 919 00:32:58,999 --> 00:32:59,917 AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating. 920 00:32:59,959 --> 00:33:01,085 TIM: Left! Left! Left! 921 00:33:01,127 --> 00:33:02,378 AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating. 922 00:33:02,420 --> 00:33:03,713 TIM: Right, right, right, right, right! 923 00:33:03,754 --> 00:33:05,131 AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating. 924 00:33:05,172 --> 00:33:07,007 And now the moment we've all waited for! 925 00:33:07,049 --> 00:33:09,385 (people screaming) 926 00:33:11,762 --> 00:33:13,055 AUTOMATED VOICE: Proceed on the current route. 927 00:33:13,097 --> 00:33:14,223 -(screams) -See, Tim? 928 00:33:14,265 --> 00:33:15,725 -(blowing) -Always trust... Holy... 929 00:33:15,766 --> 00:33:17,143 -(Tim screaming) -CAROL: Tim? 930 00:33:17,184 --> 00:33:18,436 TIM: Uh, Carol? 931 00:33:18,477 --> 00:33:20,146 You're breaking up. I'm losing you. 932 00:33:20,187 --> 00:33:21,605 No, honey, I can hear you fine. 933 00:33:21,647 --> 00:33:23,858 -See you at the pageant. Got to go. Bye. -Okay. 934 00:33:23,899 --> 00:33:24,984 (yells) 935 00:33:25,026 --> 00:33:27,778 -(screams) Whoa! -Sorry. 936 00:33:27,820 --> 00:33:29,196 (yells) 937 00:33:29,238 --> 00:33:30,281 (Jimbo whimpering) 938 00:33:30,322 --> 00:33:32,283 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. 939 00:33:32,324 --> 00:33:34,702 -(screams) -It's too real! It's too real! 940 00:33:34,744 --> 00:33:37,204 -(clamoring) -(siren wailing) 941 00:33:37,246 --> 00:33:40,833 (screaming) 942 00:33:40,875 --> 00:33:43,919 TED: Tallyho, Precious! 943 00:33:43,961 --> 00:33:45,212 (gasps) 944 00:33:46,172 --> 00:33:48,674 No, no, no, tally... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 945 00:33:48,716 --> 00:33:50,092 (whimpers) 946 00:33:51,218 --> 00:33:53,721 -(grunts) -(tires screeching) 947 00:33:53,763 --> 00:33:54,889 -(grunts) Tina! -Tina! 948 00:33:54,930 --> 00:33:56,057 -(Tim screaming) -TED: Whoa! 949 00:33:56,098 --> 00:33:57,433 (laughs) 950 00:33:57,475 --> 00:33:59,560 -(screaming) -TED: Woo-hoo! 951 00:33:59,602 --> 00:34:01,812 Whoa! (laughs) 952 00:34:01,854 --> 00:34:03,898 (Tim panting) 953 00:34:03,939 --> 00:34:05,691 -JIMBO: Tree! -(siren whoops) 954 00:34:05,733 --> 00:34:07,693 AUTOMATED VOICE: You've arrived at your destination. 955 00:34:07,735 --> 00:34:10,112 -And with a minute to spare. -(distant explosion) 956 00:34:10,154 --> 00:34:12,865 Oh. Huh. 957 00:34:12,907 --> 00:34:14,033 I'll send them a check. 958 00:34:14,075 --> 00:34:15,159 (both chuckling) 959 00:34:15,201 --> 00:34:16,452 Oh, that was fun. 960 00:34:16,494 --> 00:34:17,912 You did it. 961 00:34:17,953 --> 00:34:19,246 We did it. 962 00:34:19,288 --> 00:34:20,998 I guess we did. 963 00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:22,833 I was talking about me and Precious. 964 00:34:22,875 --> 00:34:24,835 -Oh. -Isn't that right, baby? 965 00:34:24,877 --> 00:34:26,045 Yeah. Right. 966 00:34:26,087 --> 00:34:27,838 -Get down! -(yells) 967 00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:32,134 * * 968 00:34:33,803 --> 00:34:35,846 (kids chattering) 969 00:34:42,478 --> 00:34:45,064 Whoa. This place even looks evil. 970 00:34:45,106 --> 00:34:47,024 TED: It's just a school. 971 00:34:47,066 --> 00:34:48,776 You're overreacting. 972 00:34:48,818 --> 00:34:50,027 And so is BabyCorp. 973 00:34:50,069 --> 00:34:51,320 No, I'm telling you, 974 00:34:51,362 --> 00:34:53,239 this school is stressing Tabitha out. 975 00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:54,990 Tabitha can handle it. 976 00:34:55,032 --> 00:34:57,118 She's a real chip off the old block. 977 00:34:57,159 --> 00:34:59,120 -Wait, who's the block? -I'm the block. 978 00:34:59,161 --> 00:35:00,955 Well, you can't be the block. I'm the block. 979 00:35:00,996 --> 00:35:02,456 Then start acting like a block. 980 00:35:02,498 --> 00:35:04,291 Wh-What does that mean? I'm the block. 981 00:35:04,333 --> 00:35:06,168 -I've always been the block. -Yeah. Not even close. 982 00:35:06,210 --> 00:35:07,628 TIM: All I do is block. 983 00:35:07,670 --> 00:35:09,213 I wake up in the morning, I block. 984 00:35:09,255 --> 00:35:11,090 -(kids grunting) -I go to sleep, blocking. 985 00:35:11,132 --> 00:35:13,467 -I'm the block. -Tim, enough. 986 00:35:14,427 --> 00:35:16,053 -I'm the block. -No, you're not! Stop it! 987 00:35:16,095 --> 00:35:17,346 -Shh. -(whistle blows) 988 00:35:17,388 --> 00:35:18,723 (chuckles) Sweet. 989 00:35:18,764 --> 00:35:20,182 Suckers. 990 00:35:20,224 --> 00:35:22,143 -AUTOMATED VOICE: Children only beyond this point. -Hey. 991 00:35:22,184 --> 00:35:25,229 No crying is permitted in the separation zone. 992 00:35:25,271 --> 00:35:26,814 Okay, looks like we got to split up. 993 00:35:26,856 --> 00:35:28,274 Good. I could use a break. 994 00:35:28,315 --> 00:35:30,401 -TABITHA: Bye, Mom. -All right, bye, honey. 995 00:35:30,443 --> 00:35:31,986 (gasps, yells) There's Tabitha. 996 00:35:32,028 --> 00:35:34,363 -I'll see you after school. -Okay. 997 00:35:34,405 --> 00:35:36,449 (window squeaking) 998 00:35:37,241 --> 00:35:39,160 TED: Apparently, there's no "A" 999 00:35:39,201 --> 00:35:41,370 in "teamwork," either. 1000 00:35:41,412 --> 00:35:42,872 All right, let's boogie. 1001 00:35:42,913 --> 00:35:44,707 (grunts) Not so fast. 1002 00:35:44,749 --> 00:35:47,251 I'm blue. You're yellow. 1003 00:35:47,293 --> 00:35:49,879 (laughing): You're over there in the choo-choo. 1004 00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:51,505 (raucous laughter) 1005 00:35:51,547 --> 00:35:53,966 Aw. It's full of babies. 1006 00:35:54,008 --> 00:35:55,384 Is it? I didn't notice. 1007 00:35:55,426 --> 00:35:57,845 (laughing): Just kidding. It's hilarious. 1008 00:35:57,887 --> 00:35:59,472 Uh, wait. Your tie's crooked. 1009 00:35:59,513 --> 00:36:00,931 -(fingers snap) -Okay, Tim, focus. 1010 00:36:00,973 --> 00:36:03,684 We'll meet outside Armstrong's office at 11:15. 1011 00:36:03,726 --> 00:36:05,686 We'll sneak in, and we'll plant the bugs. 1012 00:36:05,728 --> 00:36:06,854 Are you focused? 1013 00:36:06,896 --> 00:36:08,064 Hey, what the... 1014 00:36:08,105 --> 00:36:10,107 -Oh, I am focused, all right. -No, no. 1015 00:36:10,149 --> 00:36:11,442 I'm not yellow. I'm blue. 1016 00:36:11,484 --> 00:36:13,527 11:30. Stick to the plan. 1017 00:36:13,569 --> 00:36:14,570 11:15. 1018 00:36:14,612 --> 00:36:16,572 15. Got it. The block is focused. 1019 00:36:16,614 --> 00:36:19,408 -I'm blue! Aah! I'm blue. -(babies laughing) 1020 00:36:20,368 --> 00:36:22,370 Don't you understand? I'm blue! 1021 00:36:22,411 --> 00:36:24,372 ARMSTRONG (over speakers): Welcome, children. 1022 00:36:24,413 --> 00:36:25,748 Willkommen. 1023 00:36:25,790 --> 00:36:27,208 Bienvenue. 1024 00:36:27,249 --> 00:36:28,376 Annyeonghaseyo. 1025 00:36:28,417 --> 00:36:30,252 And buenos días. 1026 00:36:30,294 --> 00:36:34,215 Thank you for choosing to be excellent. 1027 00:36:34,256 --> 00:36:35,758 -Please don't touch me. -(babies laughing) 1028 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:38,135 This is some ridiculous mistake. 1029 00:36:38,177 --> 00:36:39,637 I'm blue! I'm blue! 1030 00:36:39,678 --> 00:36:41,389 * The wheels on the bus go pi R-squared * 1031 00:36:41,430 --> 00:36:43,724 -* Circumference all around. * -Yes. 1032 00:36:46,936 --> 00:36:48,229 TIM: Hello. 1033 00:36:48,270 --> 00:36:50,022 Uh, hello. 1034 00:36:50,064 --> 00:36:51,732 Nice plant. 1035 00:36:51,774 --> 00:36:54,235 This is my emotional support plant. 1036 00:36:54,276 --> 00:36:56,070 Hi. I-I'm new here. 1037 00:36:56,112 --> 00:37:00,282 Said nihonium to the other elements in the periodic table. 1038 00:37:00,324 --> 00:37:02,201 -Ooh. -(laughter) 1039 00:37:02,243 --> 00:37:03,744 Okay. 1040 00:37:03,786 --> 00:37:05,413 Can't sit here. 1041 00:37:05,454 --> 00:37:07,248 Or here. Or there. 1042 00:37:07,289 --> 00:37:08,749 (yells) 1043 00:37:08,791 --> 00:37:12,545 Seating position is determined by class rank. 1044 00:37:12,586 --> 00:37:14,672 We can't possibly include your data, 1045 00:37:14,714 --> 00:37:17,091 given that the rigor of your previous school 1046 00:37:17,133 --> 00:37:19,009 is an unknown variable. 1047 00:37:19,051 --> 00:37:20,261 -STUDENTS: Ooh. -(laughs) 1048 00:37:20,302 --> 00:37:21,887 -Sick burn, Nathan. -(grunts) 1049 00:37:21,929 --> 00:37:23,139 -(groans) -Ow. 1050 00:37:23,180 --> 00:37:24,265 Here. 1051 00:37:24,306 --> 00:37:26,434 -You can take my seat. -(sighs) 1052 00:37:26,475 --> 00:37:28,894 I'm so proud of you. 1053 00:37:28,936 --> 00:37:30,896 I mean... thanks. 1054 00:37:30,938 --> 00:37:32,398 Okay... 1055 00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:33,941 (school bell rings) 1056 00:37:33,983 --> 00:37:35,276 ARMSTRONG: Good morning. 1057 00:37:35,317 --> 00:37:36,694 STUDENTS: Good morning, Dr. Armstrong! 1058 00:37:36,736 --> 00:37:39,071 (chuckles) Very warm welcome. Thank you. 1059 00:37:39,113 --> 00:37:40,406 Huh? 1060 00:37:40,448 --> 00:37:42,450 As you can see, we've got a new colleague 1061 00:37:42,491 --> 00:37:44,243 joining us today. 1062 00:37:44,285 --> 00:37:45,745 -Ooh. -Hello. 1063 00:37:45,786 --> 00:37:47,538 New colleague, why don't you introduce yourself. 1064 00:37:47,580 --> 00:37:50,624 Uh, my name's Ti... um, Marcos. 1065 00:37:50,666 --> 00:37:53,044 -Hmm. -Marcos Lightspeed. 1066 00:37:53,085 --> 00:37:55,629 Marcos Lightspeed. 1067 00:37:55,671 --> 00:37:58,215 Yeah. Colorful, characterful, and I like it. 1068 00:37:58,257 --> 00:37:59,842 -In any case... -(gasps) 1069 00:37:59,884 --> 00:38:02,470 -...welcome, Marcos, to Blue Unit. -(gasps) 1070 00:38:02,511 --> 00:38:04,263 Our most advanced class. 1071 00:38:04,305 --> 00:38:07,099 Ooh, this is rarefied air 1072 00:38:07,141 --> 00:38:08,434 -we're breathing. -(groans) 1073 00:38:08,476 --> 00:38:10,352 Here at The Acorn Center, we believe 1074 00:38:10,394 --> 00:38:12,438 that all competition is... 1075 00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:14,982 STUDENTS: Healthy competition. 1076 00:38:15,024 --> 00:38:17,443 (babies yelling, laughing) 1077 00:38:17,485 --> 00:38:19,862 (noisemakers blaring) 1078 00:38:23,532 --> 00:38:26,911 I'm trapped in the dum-dum holding tank. 1079 00:38:26,952 --> 00:38:30,289 (gasps) I'm having a panic attack. 1080 00:38:30,331 --> 00:38:32,708 There must be a way out of here. 1081 00:38:35,711 --> 00:38:37,838 Something doesn't smell right. 1082 00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:39,965 (sniffs) Blueberry. 1083 00:38:40,007 --> 00:38:41,717 (laughing) 1084 00:38:41,759 --> 00:38:43,928 (whispers): I have to get out of here. 1085 00:38:43,969 --> 00:38:45,179 Hi. 1086 00:38:45,221 --> 00:38:46,680 Don't look at me. 1087 00:38:46,722 --> 00:38:48,682 -Okay. -(baby laughing) 1088 00:38:48,724 --> 00:38:50,976 And our first subject today is... 1089 00:38:51,018 --> 00:38:53,104 No fractions, no fractions, no fractions. Whoa! 1090 00:38:54,105 --> 00:38:55,856 Particle physics. 1091 00:38:55,898 --> 00:38:57,024 Yes! What? 1092 00:38:57,066 --> 00:38:58,150 Yes! (laughs) 1093 00:38:58,192 --> 00:38:59,652 Who knows which scientist 1094 00:38:59,694 --> 00:39:01,904 first theorized that the universe has a limit 1095 00:39:01,946 --> 00:39:04,615 beyond which the laws of physics break down? 1096 00:39:04,657 --> 00:39:06,200 (students clamoring) 1097 00:39:06,242 --> 00:39:07,952 Wow. Everybody seems to know. 1098 00:39:07,993 --> 00:39:11,455 -(sighs, gasps) -Señor Lightspeed. 1099 00:39:11,497 --> 00:39:15,000 Um, Dr. Flam... baisley? 1100 00:39:15,042 --> 00:39:17,878 -(buzzer sounds) -Oh, that's the wrong answer. 1101 00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:20,715 His brain sure doesn't move at light speed. 1102 00:39:20,756 --> 00:39:21,882 (laughter) 1103 00:39:21,924 --> 00:39:23,509 -ARMSTRONG: Uh, okay. -I know, right? 1104 00:39:23,551 --> 00:39:25,386 -Anybody else? -Right here. 1105 00:39:25,428 --> 00:39:26,804 -Max Planck. -(bell dings) 1106 00:39:26,846 --> 00:39:28,305 ARMSTRONG: That's correct. 1107 00:39:28,347 --> 00:39:29,724 Tabitha has set the bar. 1108 00:39:29,765 --> 00:39:31,434 First one on the board. Ding, ding, ding. 1109 00:39:31,475 --> 00:39:33,561 Way to go, Tabitha. 1110 00:39:33,602 --> 00:39:36,063 You're going down, Templeton. 1111 00:39:36,105 --> 00:39:37,523 Bring it on, Nathan. 1112 00:39:37,565 --> 00:39:38,733 Yeah, Tabitha. Get him. 1113 00:39:38,774 --> 00:39:41,277 ARMSTRONG: Next subject. 1114 00:39:41,318 --> 00:39:42,903 Ancient Greek. 1115 00:39:42,945 --> 00:39:45,740 -STUDENTS: Opa! -Oprah! (chuckles) 1116 00:39:45,781 --> 00:39:47,908 -(laughter, babbling) -Attention. 1117 00:39:47,950 --> 00:39:49,785 Attention, everyone. 1118 00:39:49,827 --> 00:39:52,496 Who wants to play Shawshank? 1119 00:39:52,538 --> 00:39:53,998 -No! -BABIES: Huh? 1120 00:39:54,832 --> 00:39:58,002 Who wants to go outside and play? 1121 00:39:58,044 --> 00:40:01,130 -(cheering) -Does that sound fun? Good. 1122 00:40:01,172 --> 00:40:03,090 Now, anybody have any ideas? 1123 00:40:03,132 --> 00:40:04,425 -BABY: No! -Come on, people. 1124 00:40:04,467 --> 00:40:05,551 Think, think, think, think, think. 1125 00:40:05,593 --> 00:40:06,802 We need to think outside the box. 1126 00:40:06,844 --> 00:40:08,262 -Oh, oh, oh! Me, me! Oh! -You, Bo-Peep. 1127 00:40:08,304 --> 00:40:11,348 We can build a hot-air balloon 1128 00:40:11,390 --> 00:40:13,309 out of Popsicle sticks and bubble gum! 1129 00:40:13,350 --> 00:40:14,643 (laughing) 1130 00:40:14,685 --> 00:40:16,353 And how would it fly? 1131 00:40:16,395 --> 00:40:18,272 -Pixie dust! -(laughing, cheering) 1132 00:40:18,314 --> 00:40:19,815 Get back in the box, Bo-Peep. 1133 00:40:19,857 --> 00:40:22,109 -All the way in? -All the way in. 1134 00:40:22,151 --> 00:40:24,320 -Yay! -Ooh. Uh, can we get in the box, too? 1135 00:40:24,362 --> 00:40:26,364 -Can we? Can we? -BABY: Glue. 1136 00:40:26,405 --> 00:40:28,324 I like glue. 1137 00:40:28,366 --> 00:40:29,533 Who doesn't? 1138 00:40:29,575 --> 00:40:30,993 But we're trying to brainstorm here. 1139 00:40:31,035 --> 00:40:32,286 Glue's good. 1140 00:40:32,328 --> 00:40:33,996 (laughing wildly) 1141 00:40:34,038 --> 00:40:36,791 -Think, think, think, think, think, think... -(groans) 1142 00:40:36,832 --> 00:40:39,960 ...think, think, think, think, think, think, think, think! 1143 00:40:40,002 --> 00:40:41,462 Bingo. 1144 00:40:41,504 --> 00:40:42,797 Next subject. 1145 00:40:42,838 --> 00:40:45,466 X is equal to the derivative of... 1146 00:40:45,508 --> 00:40:46,759 -NATHAN: Ooh, me! -Itself. 1147 00:40:46,801 --> 00:40:48,427 ARMSTRONG: Kudos for Tabitha. 1148 00:40:48,469 --> 00:40:49,929 Wow. You knew that? 1149 00:40:49,970 --> 00:40:53,265 The world's leading producer of bauxite is... 1150 00:40:53,307 --> 00:40:54,767 -NATHAN: Oh! -Australia. 1151 00:40:54,809 --> 00:40:56,143 ARMSTRONG: Once again, Tabitha's on the board. 1152 00:40:56,185 --> 00:40:58,396 -Very good. -Yes, Tabitha! -(applause) 1153 00:40:58,437 --> 00:41:00,022 We got 15 minutes, people. 1154 00:41:00,064 --> 00:41:02,191 The difference in "try" and "triumph" 1155 00:41:02,233 --> 00:41:03,984 is just a little oomph. 1156 00:41:04,026 --> 00:41:07,113 -BABIES: Oomph! -Go big or go home. 1157 00:41:07,154 --> 00:41:08,739 Okay. Going home. 1158 00:41:08,781 --> 00:41:10,533 -Let's pick up the pace. -No! 1159 00:41:10,574 --> 00:41:13,577 Hand downs, Norma Rae. This is my time. 1160 00:41:13,619 --> 00:41:15,746 To be, or not to be? Tabitha. 1161 00:41:15,788 --> 00:41:17,331 -To be. -That's correct. -(bell dings) 1162 00:41:17,373 --> 00:41:21,335 Can anyone tell me the horsepower of a 302 engine? 1163 00:41:21,377 --> 00:41:23,170 -Uh, seven? -(buzzer sounds) 1164 00:41:23,212 --> 00:41:24,922 -ARMSTRONG: Oh, boy. -Weak sauce, Nathan. 1165 00:41:24,964 --> 00:41:26,507 -That was weak. -(groans) 1166 00:41:26,549 --> 00:41:27,758 Tabitha, do you have an idea about that? 1167 00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:30,344 300 horsepower with a four-barrel carb. 1168 00:41:30,386 --> 00:41:31,637 -(bell dings) -TIM: Wow. -(groans) 1169 00:41:31,679 --> 00:41:33,514 -Her dad must be a genius. -(applause) 1170 00:41:33,556 --> 00:41:36,058 On my signal, unleash heck. 1171 00:41:36,851 --> 00:41:38,978 -Fire! -(babies grunt) 1172 00:41:39,979 --> 00:41:42,565 -(babies cheering) -Yes! 1173 00:41:43,816 --> 00:41:45,901 -I found a cure! -(cheering) 1174 00:41:45,943 --> 00:41:47,695 -(bell dings) -Yes! Yes! She did it! 1175 00:41:47,737 --> 00:41:48,904 She did it. 1176 00:41:48,946 --> 00:41:50,531 -(students gasp) -(buzzers sounding) 1177 00:41:50,573 --> 00:41:52,199 STUDENTS: Marcos! 1178 00:41:52,241 --> 00:41:54,493 I did it. I did it. 1179 00:41:54,535 --> 00:41:56,370 (babies cheering) 1180 00:41:56,412 --> 00:42:00,291 Remember, your size doesn't determine your strength. 1181 00:42:01,834 --> 00:42:04,211 Well, so far, it's Tabitha number one 1182 00:42:04,253 --> 00:42:05,713 and everybody else last. 1183 00:42:05,755 --> 00:42:08,382 -(cheering, applause) -(groans, sobs) 1184 00:42:08,424 --> 00:42:11,010 * * 1185 00:42:15,264 --> 00:42:16,432 Psst. Hey, Tabitha. 1186 00:42:16,474 --> 00:42:17,683 You're really... 1187 00:42:17,725 --> 00:42:20,311 -A geek. I know. -No. 1188 00:42:20,352 --> 00:42:22,229 You're amazing. 1189 00:42:22,271 --> 00:42:24,565 Oh. Thanks, Marcos. 1190 00:42:24,607 --> 00:42:28,069 You'll be singing a different tune at rehearsal. 1191 00:42:28,110 --> 00:42:30,154 The wrong tune. 1192 00:42:30,196 --> 00:42:31,364 (both laughing) 1193 00:42:31,405 --> 00:42:32,656 You're so funny. 1194 00:42:32,698 --> 00:42:34,367 Hilarious! 1195 00:42:36,952 --> 00:42:39,413 And yeah, Templeton, don't be late. 1196 00:42:39,455 --> 00:42:41,123 -(laughs) -(gasps) Late. 1197 00:42:41,165 --> 00:42:43,250 -I'm late. -ARMSTRONG: Next subject. 1198 00:42:43,292 --> 00:42:44,460 Yes! 1199 00:42:44,502 --> 00:42:46,420 (straining): Just a little further. 1200 00:42:46,462 --> 00:42:49,548 (babies giggling, babbling) 1201 00:42:49,590 --> 00:42:50,758 Glue! 1202 00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:52,593 (yells, screams) 1203 00:42:52,635 --> 00:42:53,761 -TIM: Excuse me. -(engine revving) 1204 00:42:53,803 --> 00:42:55,054 Yes, Marcos. 1205 00:42:55,096 --> 00:42:57,890 Can I have a hall pass? I have to go. 1206 00:42:57,932 --> 00:43:00,434 ARMSTRONG: Voilà. Feel free. 1207 00:43:00,476 --> 00:43:02,103 (scoffs) Now what? 1208 00:43:02,144 --> 00:43:03,896 -(grunts) Now what? -(babies crying) 1209 00:43:03,938 --> 00:43:05,523 Glue! 1210 00:43:05,564 --> 00:43:07,400 Glue is bad! 1211 00:43:07,441 --> 00:43:09,110 (whimpering) 1212 00:43:09,151 --> 00:43:10,277 Glue. 1213 00:43:10,319 --> 00:43:12,738 (gasps) Glue is good. 1214 00:43:12,780 --> 00:43:16,117 How to get to the principal's office. 1215 00:43:16,158 --> 00:43:17,618 Of course. 1216 00:43:17,660 --> 00:43:20,538 You get sent to the principal's office. 1217 00:43:20,579 --> 00:43:22,707 ("It's Tricky" by Run-D.M.C. playing) 1218 00:43:22,748 --> 00:43:25,042 -Booyah! -(students gasp) 1219 00:43:25,084 --> 00:43:28,087 * I think it's very vital to rock a rhyme... * 1220 00:43:28,129 --> 00:43:30,131 * Here we go, it's tricky to rock a rhyme * 1221 00:43:30,172 --> 00:43:34,051 * To rock a rhyme that's right on time, it's tricky * 1222 00:43:34,093 --> 00:43:36,387 * It's tricky, tricky, tricky, tricky * 1223 00:43:36,429 --> 00:43:38,097 * It's tricky to rock a rhyme * 1224 00:43:38,139 --> 00:43:40,641 * To rock a rhyme that's right on time, it's tricky... * 1225 00:43:40,683 --> 00:43:42,476 What's up, y'all? 1226 00:43:42,518 --> 00:43:44,562 School is... 1227 00:43:44,603 --> 00:43:46,105 -stupid. -(students gasp) 1228 00:43:46,147 --> 00:43:48,858 (staticky): Listen, you know, I acknowledge your anger. 1229 00:43:48,899 --> 00:43:51,652 It's, uh, very, uh, feisty, but please sit down. 1230 00:43:51,694 --> 00:43:54,363 -Okay. Uh, no. -(students gasp) 1231 00:43:54,405 --> 00:43:57,158 Sitting is... stupid! 1232 00:43:57,199 --> 00:43:59,660 -He's such a bad boy. -STUDENTS: Ooh. 1233 00:43:59,702 --> 00:44:01,912 (speaking indistinctly through static) 1234 00:44:01,954 --> 00:44:03,873 * It's tricky to rock a rhyme * 1235 00:44:03,914 --> 00:44:06,500 * To rock a rhyme that's right on time, it's tricky * 1236 00:44:06,542 --> 00:44:09,003 -* How is it, D? * -* It's tricky, tricky... * 1237 00:44:09,045 --> 00:44:12,256 All right. I'm afraid you can't disrupt class any longer. 1238 00:44:12,298 --> 00:44:16,052 Oh, no. Are we gonna have a talk in your office? 1239 00:44:16,093 --> 00:44:17,678 No. 1240 00:44:17,720 --> 00:44:19,847 -You are gonna have a time-out. -STUDENTS (gasping): The Box? 1241 00:44:19,889 --> 00:44:21,849 -He's going in the Box. -(murmuring) 1242 00:44:21,891 --> 00:44:24,351 No, the Box makes you crazy. 1243 00:44:24,393 --> 00:44:25,853 The Box? 1244 00:44:25,895 --> 00:44:29,523 * Sail away, sail away, sail away * 1245 00:44:29,565 --> 00:44:32,360 (groans) * Sail away, sail away * 1246 00:44:32,401 --> 00:44:33,819 -* Sail away... * -(grunts) 1247 00:44:33,861 --> 00:44:36,072 -ARMSTRONG: Sayonara, Marcos. -(gasps) 1248 00:44:36,113 --> 00:44:38,657 AUTOMATED VOICE: Your time-out begins now. 1249 00:44:38,699 --> 00:44:40,034 Relax. 1250 00:44:40,076 --> 00:44:42,203 -Wait! -(music stops) 1251 00:44:42,244 --> 00:44:44,580 (child crying) 1252 00:44:44,622 --> 00:44:46,290 ROBOT VOICE: Don't cry. 1253 00:44:46,332 --> 00:44:48,209 There, there. All better. 1254 00:44:48,250 --> 00:44:50,544 (Ted grunting) 1255 00:44:50,586 --> 00:44:51,712 (muffled grunting) 1256 00:44:51,754 --> 00:44:53,756 (yells, mumbles) 1257 00:44:53,798 --> 00:44:56,884 (grunting, spitting) 1258 00:44:57,718 --> 00:45:00,304 (sighs) It's like they always say: 1259 00:45:00,346 --> 00:45:02,181 If you want something done right, 1260 00:45:02,223 --> 00:45:04,892 you have to do it without your brother! 1261 00:45:05,768 --> 00:45:08,854 We meet again, doorknob. 1262 00:45:10,398 --> 00:45:12,233 (grunting) 1263 00:45:12,274 --> 00:45:13,901 (door creaking) 1264 00:45:14,694 --> 00:45:16,362 ARMSTRONG: Hello. 1265 00:45:16,404 --> 00:45:17,863 Welcome, welcome. 1266 00:45:17,905 --> 00:45:19,782 Please come in. Entrez vous? 1267 00:45:19,824 --> 00:45:21,242 You're here. 1268 00:45:21,283 --> 00:45:22,785 Oh, yes. I... 1269 00:45:22,827 --> 00:45:24,995 I was expecting you. 1270 00:45:25,830 --> 00:45:27,915 I... (grunts, yells) 1271 00:45:27,957 --> 00:45:28,916 (button beeps) 1272 00:45:28,958 --> 00:45:31,252 I expected that you 1273 00:45:31,293 --> 00:45:34,338 would be expecting me, so there. 1274 00:45:34,380 --> 00:45:37,883 Oh, and, uh, by the way, I know why you're here, 1275 00:45:37,925 --> 00:45:39,927 -so, uh... so there. -(button beeps) 1276 00:45:39,969 --> 00:45:42,763 (chuckles) You do? 1277 00:45:42,805 --> 00:45:45,057 -Mm-hmm. Yes, I do. -(button beeps) 1278 00:45:45,099 --> 00:45:46,767 -(whirring) -Have a seat, please. 1279 00:45:46,809 --> 00:45:48,185 (grunts) Thank you. 1280 00:45:48,227 --> 00:45:49,895 -You know what you are? -Mm? 1281 00:45:49,937 --> 00:45:54,275 You are, if I may, extremely intelligent. 1282 00:45:54,316 --> 00:45:55,776 Go on. (grunts) 1283 00:45:55,818 --> 00:45:57,403 Uh, as a matter of fact, I've been observing you. 1284 00:45:57,445 --> 00:45:58,571 (button beeps) 1285 00:45:58,612 --> 00:46:00,531 Spends time wisely. Check. 1286 00:46:00,573 --> 00:46:03,200 Makes good use of classroom materials. Check. 1287 00:46:03,242 --> 00:46:05,786 Keeps hands to self. Check. 1288 00:46:05,828 --> 00:46:07,329 Hey, forget "works well with others." 1289 00:46:07,371 --> 00:46:10,458 You make others work well for you. 1290 00:46:10,499 --> 00:46:13,878 That's literally the title of the book I'm working on. 1291 00:46:13,919 --> 00:46:16,130 No kidding. You had no business 1292 00:46:16,172 --> 00:46:18,257 being in Yellow Level, did you? 1293 00:46:18,299 --> 00:46:20,634 -It was sabotage. -Sabotage. Exactly. 1294 00:46:20,676 --> 00:46:23,220 Jealousy, fear. Hey, I faced the same obstacles. 1295 00:46:23,262 --> 00:46:26,849 In fact, you know, you remind me a lot of myself 1296 00:46:26,891 --> 00:46:29,310 when I was your age, 1297 00:46:29,351 --> 00:46:32,146 which is now. 1298 00:46:32,188 --> 00:46:33,606 (grunts) 1299 00:46:35,566 --> 00:46:36,650 What? 1300 00:46:36,692 --> 00:46:37,985 (laughs) 1301 00:46:38,027 --> 00:46:41,322 Surprise, surprise. 1302 00:46:41,364 --> 00:46:43,824 What the frittata? 1303 00:46:43,866 --> 00:46:44,950 Well put. 1304 00:46:44,992 --> 00:46:47,411 He's a ba... You're a baby. 1305 00:46:47,453 --> 00:46:49,997 I repeat, you're a baby. 1306 00:46:50,039 --> 00:46:52,500 So surprised, you said it twice. (chuckles) 1307 00:46:52,541 --> 00:46:54,001 (laughs) 1308 00:46:54,043 --> 00:46:57,505 Unfortunately, people are, uh, not ready for a... 1309 00:46:57,546 --> 00:46:59,757 a baby in a position of power. 1310 00:46:59,799 --> 00:47:01,300 Yet. 1311 00:47:01,342 --> 00:47:04,011 Remind me to get the number of your muttonchop guy. 1312 00:47:04,053 --> 00:47:06,847 You know, I could use somebody like you. 1313 00:47:06,889 --> 00:47:10,810 With a superior intelligence like my own. 1314 00:47:10,851 --> 00:47:13,521 -Uh... really? -Mmm. 1315 00:47:13,562 --> 00:47:14,939 Somebody who can, uh... 1316 00:47:14,980 --> 00:47:17,108 Mmm. (crunching) 1317 00:47:17,149 --> 00:47:18,526 -Mmm. Yeah. -(gasps) 1318 00:47:18,567 --> 00:47:21,278 Truly comprehend what I'm trying to accomplish. 1319 00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,031 -Well, you're looking at him. -Bingo. 1320 00:47:24,073 --> 00:47:26,242 Mmm. We have a secret level. 1321 00:47:26,283 --> 00:47:27,910 Mmm. For very special babies. 1322 00:47:27,952 --> 00:47:29,412 Mmm. The best of the best. 1323 00:47:29,453 --> 00:47:30,663 Ah. The elite. 1324 00:47:30,705 --> 00:47:31,706 Beyond blue? 1325 00:47:31,747 --> 00:47:33,749 Oh, yeah. Way beyond. 1326 00:47:33,791 --> 00:47:35,751 Way beyond. Ooh. 1327 00:47:35,793 --> 00:47:37,878 Mmm. There's a meeting today... 1328 00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:39,630 (slurps) ...after school. 1329 00:47:39,672 --> 00:47:41,173 Babies only. 1330 00:47:41,215 --> 00:47:44,051 We may be small, but we're about to teach grown-ups 1331 00:47:44,093 --> 00:47:46,429 a big lesson. 1332 00:47:47,805 --> 00:47:49,724 Mmm. Lolly? 1333 00:47:49,765 --> 00:47:51,058 -Okay. -(school bell ringing) 1334 00:47:51,100 --> 00:47:52,601 Oh. Time for recess. 1335 00:47:52,643 --> 00:47:54,103 -Bye-bye. -(button beeps) 1336 00:47:54,812 --> 00:47:56,856 (singsongy): Sayonara.... 1337 00:47:56,897 --> 00:47:58,441 (groans) 1338 00:47:59,483 --> 00:48:01,235 (grunts) 1339 00:48:01,277 --> 00:48:03,487 Well, I think that went well. 1340 00:48:04,613 --> 00:48:06,407 -TED (recorded): You're a baby. -TINA: What? 1341 00:48:06,449 --> 00:48:08,451 -I repeat, you're a baby. -(scoffs) 1342 00:48:08,492 --> 00:48:10,661 Is he talking to me? He better not be talking to me, 1343 00:48:10,703 --> 00:48:12,163 because I'll... Armstrong? 1344 00:48:12,204 --> 00:48:13,914 (chuckles) You're right, Connie. 1345 00:48:13,956 --> 00:48:15,458 He's talking about Armstrong. 1346 00:48:15,499 --> 00:48:17,251 -I don't know what has gotten into her. -(gasps) 1347 00:48:17,293 --> 00:48:20,921 -But she's acting strange, Dr. Federman. -(laughing) 1348 00:48:20,963 --> 00:48:23,174 Isn't it a bit early for terrible twos? 1349 00:48:23,215 --> 00:48:25,051 Is there terrible ones? Is that a thing? 1350 00:48:25,092 --> 00:48:26,594 Oh, piano-playing bunny, you slay me. 1351 00:48:26,635 --> 00:48:28,179 Okey dokey. 1352 00:48:28,220 --> 00:48:32,516 We need some eyes on the prize, visual confirmation here. 1353 00:48:32,558 --> 00:48:33,809 (snoring) 1354 00:48:33,851 --> 00:48:36,062 Oh, Daddy. 1355 00:48:36,103 --> 00:48:38,147 If I were there, I'd pinch you so hard. 1356 00:48:38,189 --> 00:48:40,024 (sleepily): * Sail away, sail away... * 1357 00:48:40,066 --> 00:48:41,859 AUTOMATED VOICE: Your time-out has concluded. 1358 00:48:41,901 --> 00:48:43,778 Sail away! What time is it? 1359 00:48:43,819 --> 00:48:45,488 AUTOMATED VOICE: It is time for recess. 1360 00:48:45,529 --> 00:48:47,531 I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late. Come on. 1361 00:48:47,573 --> 00:48:49,533 (chuckling): He'll understand, right? 1362 00:48:49,575 --> 00:48:51,369 (gasps) Okay. Where is he? Where is he? 1363 00:48:51,410 --> 00:48:54,747 -Where is he? Uh... -(kids chattering, whooping) 1364 00:48:54,789 --> 00:48:56,707 -Oomph! Yeah, baby! -(cheering) 1365 00:48:56,749 --> 00:48:58,292 No, not my bows. 1366 00:48:58,334 --> 00:49:01,670 -But they're not your bows... anymore. -(sobbing) 1367 00:49:01,712 --> 00:49:04,673 Yep, where there's crying, there's my brother. 1368 00:49:06,300 --> 00:49:09,470 (playing "May" from The Shawshank Redemption) 1369 00:49:09,512 --> 00:49:11,680 BABY (whispers): Psst. Here you go. 1370 00:49:11,722 --> 00:49:13,265 BABY 2: Cool. 1371 00:49:14,016 --> 00:49:16,352 (grunting): Glue. Glue. Glue. 1372 00:49:19,271 --> 00:49:21,023 -Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, blue. -Whoa! 1373 00:49:21,065 --> 00:49:22,817 Where do you think youse going? You lost? 1374 00:49:22,858 --> 00:49:23,818 Could you let me through, please? 1375 00:49:23,859 --> 00:49:25,277 No! 1376 00:49:25,319 --> 00:49:27,988 So, what, did you flunk coloring class, kid? 1377 00:49:28,030 --> 00:49:29,615 -(laughter) -Really, guy? 1378 00:49:30,574 --> 00:49:32,326 Mmm, cherry. 1379 00:49:32,368 --> 00:49:33,327 Go on. 1380 00:49:33,369 --> 00:49:34,704 -Blues on the other side. -(groans) 1381 00:49:34,745 --> 00:49:36,038 TED: Let him through. 1382 00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:37,164 Okay, he's cool. 1383 00:49:37,206 --> 00:49:38,582 TIM: See? I'm cool. 1384 00:49:38,624 --> 00:49:39,834 I'm cool. 1385 00:49:39,875 --> 00:49:41,669 You failed me, Tim. 1386 00:49:41,711 --> 00:49:43,129 I was desperate. 1387 00:49:43,170 --> 00:49:45,840 I crawled. I did things with glue 1388 00:49:45,881 --> 00:49:48,259 that I'm not proud of, but I made it. 1389 00:49:48,300 --> 00:49:50,219 I made it all the way to Armstrong's office, 1390 00:49:50,261 --> 00:49:52,221 and then where's Tim? 1391 00:49:52,263 --> 00:49:53,431 -I know. I... -Where's Tim? 1392 00:49:53,472 --> 00:49:55,182 -I tried to... -Where's Tim?! 1393 00:49:55,224 --> 00:49:57,059 -I was in the Box, okay? -(babies gasping) 1394 00:49:57,101 --> 00:49:58,310 -TED: The Box? -The Box? 1395 00:49:58,352 --> 00:49:59,186 Glue. 1396 00:49:59,228 --> 00:50:00,730 Yeah, that's right. 1397 00:50:00,771 --> 00:50:01,981 (whispers): The Box. 1398 00:50:02,023 --> 00:50:03,357 Show a little respect. 1399 00:50:03,399 --> 00:50:06,277 See, Tim, this is why I work alone. 1400 00:50:06,318 --> 00:50:08,863 -(sighs) -I'll succeed in the mission. 1401 00:50:08,904 --> 00:50:10,406 You can take the pony home. 1402 00:50:10,448 --> 00:50:12,783 The only thing you're ever gonna succeed at 1403 00:50:12,825 --> 00:50:13,826 is being alone. 1404 00:50:13,868 --> 00:50:15,036 -Fine. -Fine! 1405 00:50:15,077 --> 00:50:16,537 Fine! 1406 00:50:16,579 --> 00:50:18,039 I like ponies. 1407 00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:20,416 Aah! Thank you for sharing. 1408 00:50:20,458 --> 00:50:22,752 (piano playing gentle tune) 1409 00:50:25,588 --> 00:50:27,423 -(Nathan groans in frustration) -(piano plays discordant notes) 1410 00:50:27,465 --> 00:50:29,050 NATHAN: You are blowing it, Templeton! 1411 00:50:29,091 --> 00:50:30,217 MEGHAN: Yeah, Templeton. 1412 00:50:30,259 --> 00:50:31,635 TABITHA: I'm trying. 1413 00:50:31,677 --> 00:50:34,305 NATHAN: Ugh! You always come in a beat late. 1414 00:50:34,346 --> 00:50:36,807 I'm sorry, Nathan. I'm doing my best. 1415 00:50:36,849 --> 00:50:40,728 Your best is going to keep me out of going to Juilliard. 1416 00:50:40,770 --> 00:50:42,688 -Yeah, Templeton. -It's one, two, three 1417 00:50:42,730 --> 00:50:45,107 -and one, two, three. -MEGHAN: One, two, three. 1418 00:50:45,149 --> 00:50:46,609 NATHAN and MEGHAN: And one, two, three 1419 00:50:46,650 --> 00:50:49,403 and one, two, three and one, two, three. 1420 00:50:49,445 --> 00:50:52,740 -And one, two... -Oh, come on! 1421 00:50:52,782 --> 00:50:54,075 Are you kidding me? 1422 00:50:54,116 --> 00:50:55,743 I just can't do it right now, okay? 1423 00:50:55,785 --> 00:50:57,203 I can't. I just can't. 1424 00:50:57,244 --> 00:50:59,372 -I'll do it tomorrow. -MEGHAN: Seriously? 1425 00:50:59,413 --> 00:51:01,248 -(school bell rings) -(kids cheering) 1426 00:51:01,290 --> 00:51:03,501 NATHAN: All right, all right, all right. 1427 00:51:03,542 --> 00:51:05,920 See you at the pageant tomorrow. 1428 00:51:05,961 --> 00:51:07,880 Beat it! 1429 00:51:12,510 --> 00:51:15,679 MEGHAN: Oh, Nathan, Nathan, let me do it. 1430 00:51:15,721 --> 00:51:17,056 Let me do it, Nathan. 1431 00:51:17,098 --> 00:51:18,599 I want to sing the song. 1432 00:51:18,641 --> 00:51:19,934 No. 1433 00:51:19,975 --> 00:51:21,894 I want to see her fail. 1434 00:51:21,936 --> 00:51:23,604 Oh. 1435 00:51:23,646 --> 00:51:25,231 Pure genius. 1436 00:51:25,272 --> 00:51:27,441 -(laughing) -(plays ominous chords) 1437 00:51:27,483 --> 00:51:29,110 NATHAN: I can't wait. 1438 00:51:29,151 --> 00:51:30,653 -We'll see about that. -(school bell ringing) 1439 00:51:30,695 --> 00:51:32,613 ARMSTRONG (over speaker): Goodbye, children. 1440 00:51:32,655 --> 00:51:33,781 Sayonara. 1441 00:51:33,823 --> 00:51:35,116 Auf Wiedersehen. 1442 00:51:35,157 --> 00:51:36,283 Adieu. 1443 00:51:36,325 --> 00:51:38,244 Adios, niños. 1444 00:51:38,285 --> 00:51:39,787 (students chattering) 1445 00:51:39,829 --> 00:51:41,288 -(sighs) -(horse neighs) 1446 00:51:41,330 --> 00:51:42,915 (Tim gasps) 1447 00:51:42,957 --> 00:51:44,291 Oh, come on. 1448 00:51:45,167 --> 00:51:46,377 (yells) 1449 00:51:47,503 --> 00:51:48,879 (yelps) 1450 00:51:48,921 --> 00:51:51,298 Oh, my gosh. 1451 00:51:51,340 --> 00:51:54,760 -Stop what you're doing. -(chatter stops) 1452 00:51:54,802 --> 00:51:56,137 I see a baby pony. 1453 00:51:56,178 --> 00:51:57,972 -(screaming) -(excited chatter) 1454 00:51:58,013 --> 00:51:59,515 I like ponies. 1455 00:51:59,557 --> 00:52:00,808 STUDENT: Oh, over there! 1456 00:52:00,850 --> 00:52:01,976 -Yes! -(laughter) 1457 00:52:02,017 --> 00:52:04,145 It's so cute! 1458 00:52:04,186 --> 00:52:05,938 (excited chatter) 1459 00:52:05,980 --> 00:52:08,357 (horn honks) 1460 00:52:12,236 --> 00:52:14,030 That's it? No hello? 1461 00:52:14,071 --> 00:52:16,073 -Not even a "Hi, Mom"? -What? 1462 00:52:16,115 --> 00:52:17,950 -Hi, Tabitha! -(gasps) 1463 00:52:17,992 --> 00:52:19,869 -Oh. Hi. -(Tina coughs) 1464 00:52:20,661 --> 00:52:22,246 What? You never told me you had 1465 00:52:22,288 --> 00:52:24,123 an older sister who could drive. 1466 00:52:24,165 --> 00:52:25,624 Uh, that's my mom. 1467 00:52:25,666 --> 00:52:27,376 Tabitha, don't interrupt. (chuckles) 1468 00:52:27,418 --> 00:52:29,462 -Yeah, I'm a new friend of Tabitha's... -Hey, stop. 1469 00:52:29,503 --> 00:52:31,505 -(mumbling) -Oh, really? 1470 00:52:31,547 --> 00:52:33,340 I-I mean, we just met. 1471 00:52:33,382 --> 00:52:34,383 Well, what's your name, new friend? 1472 00:52:34,425 --> 00:52:36,469 Stop. You're embarrassing me. 1473 00:52:36,510 --> 00:52:38,804 -Marcos. Marcos Lightspeed. -(horse neighs) 1474 00:52:38,846 --> 00:52:40,181 (babbles, grunts) 1475 00:52:40,222 --> 00:52:41,557 -Ow! -CAROL: Tina! 1476 00:52:41,599 --> 00:52:43,017 -What is with you? -(Tim chuckles) 1477 00:52:43,059 --> 00:52:44,477 Cute kid. 1478 00:52:44,518 --> 00:52:46,437 Well, I better get going if I'm gonna walk those 1479 00:52:46,479 --> 00:52:49,023 three and a half miles home... 1480 00:52:49,065 --> 00:52:50,399 in the snow... 1481 00:52:50,441 --> 00:52:52,026 without a jacket. 1482 00:52:52,068 --> 00:52:53,861 Three and a half miles? 1483 00:52:53,903 --> 00:52:56,697 Three and a half, six-- somewhere in there. (chuckles) 1484 00:52:56,739 --> 00:52:59,075 Yeah, well, that TV dinner is not gonna microwave itself. 1485 00:52:59,116 --> 00:53:00,493 TV dinner? 1486 00:53:00,534 --> 00:53:02,870 Yeah, I'm a latchkey kid, so I eat whatever I want. 1487 00:53:02,912 --> 00:53:04,914 -Cartoons are my babysitter. -(tires screech) 1488 00:53:04,955 --> 00:53:06,123 -No. -Oh, yeah. 1489 00:53:06,165 --> 00:53:08,125 (scoffs) 1490 00:53:08,167 --> 00:53:11,420 * Strangers in the night * 1491 00:53:11,462 --> 00:53:13,923 * Exchanging glances * 1492 00:53:13,964 --> 00:53:15,216 * Lovers... * 1493 00:53:15,257 --> 00:53:16,717 What is this? 1494 00:53:16,759 --> 00:53:19,053 Some kind of prank? 1495 00:53:19,095 --> 00:53:20,388 Children can be so cruel. 1496 00:53:20,429 --> 00:53:21,847 -Hello. -(electronic chime) 1497 00:53:21,889 --> 00:53:24,683 (screaming) 1498 00:53:24,725 --> 00:53:26,394 (grunts) 1499 00:53:28,854 --> 00:53:30,356 (retches) 1500 00:53:30,398 --> 00:53:32,650 -(grunts) -(babies yelling, laughing) 1501 00:53:33,859 --> 00:53:35,236 (grunts) 1502 00:53:35,277 --> 00:53:36,821 (retches) 1503 00:53:36,862 --> 00:53:40,950 Whoa. This is exactly like Bill Gates' rec room... 1504 00:53:40,991 --> 00:53:43,452 but a little smaller. 1505 00:53:44,203 --> 00:53:46,288 (grunting) 1506 00:53:47,248 --> 00:53:49,500 -(straining) -(scraping) 1507 00:53:52,336 --> 00:53:55,089 What is all this? 1508 00:53:55,131 --> 00:53:57,383 Research and development? 1509 00:53:58,718 --> 00:54:00,928 Product testing? 1510 00:54:02,555 --> 00:54:07,017 Huh. Something tells me this isn't day care. 1511 00:54:08,060 --> 00:54:10,938 Boy, could I use a spy camera right about now. 1512 00:54:10,980 --> 00:54:14,483 * Sail away, sail away, sail away. * 1513 00:54:15,276 --> 00:54:17,028 Anyway... 1514 00:54:18,696 --> 00:54:21,115 -(gasps) -(muffled babbling) 1515 00:54:21,157 --> 00:54:22,700 TED: Aw. 1516 00:54:22,742 --> 00:54:25,786 Now, aren't you a cutie in that little karate outfit. 1517 00:54:25,828 --> 00:54:27,121 (baby grunts) 1518 00:54:27,163 --> 00:54:28,372 Huh. 1519 00:54:28,414 --> 00:54:30,541 (all whooping, grunting) 1520 00:54:30,583 --> 00:54:33,294 Is this some kind of a ninja boy band? 1521 00:54:33,335 --> 00:54:34,503 (screams) 1522 00:54:34,545 --> 00:54:37,131 -Whoa...! -(babies whooping) 1523 00:54:37,173 --> 00:54:39,133 Whoa! 1524 00:54:39,175 --> 00:54:40,968 Oh. Whoa, whoa. 1525 00:54:41,010 --> 00:54:42,887 (all grunting, whooping) 1526 00:54:42,928 --> 00:54:45,139 Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh! 1527 00:54:45,181 --> 00:54:46,140 (screams) 1528 00:54:46,182 --> 00:54:47,641 Whoa. (yells) 1529 00:54:47,683 --> 00:54:48,642 I give up. 1530 00:54:48,684 --> 00:54:52,396 Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai! 1531 00:54:52,438 --> 00:54:55,441 (all grunting rapidly) 1532 00:54:55,483 --> 00:54:57,318 TED: Sayonara, baby! 1533 00:54:57,360 --> 00:54:59,362 -Hey, there you are. -Oh, hello! (coughs) 1534 00:54:59,403 --> 00:55:00,696 Thank you. (sighs) 1535 00:55:00,738 --> 00:55:02,490 I see that you've angered my baby ninjas. 1536 00:55:02,531 --> 00:55:03,908 -Oh, boy. Oh, boy. -(baby laughs, grunts) 1537 00:55:03,949 --> 00:55:05,659 -Shoo. Shoo. (chuckles) -(sneezes, babbles) 1538 00:55:05,701 --> 00:55:07,870 What maniacal underground fortress doesn't have ninjas? 1539 00:55:07,912 --> 00:55:09,497 -Am I right? (grunts) -Impressive, huh? 1540 00:55:09,538 --> 00:55:10,831 Pretty impressive. 1541 00:55:10,873 --> 00:55:12,333 What do you think? What do you think? 1542 00:55:12,375 --> 00:55:13,459 TED: I know tuition is pretty steep, 1543 00:55:13,501 --> 00:55:15,586 but how do you afford all this? 1544 00:55:15,628 --> 00:55:17,546 ARMSTRONG: Oh, that's a good question. 1545 00:55:17,588 --> 00:55:20,132 -I taught babies to code. -No. 1546 00:55:20,174 --> 00:55:22,134 ARMSTRONG: Yes. And you know what they say about having 1547 00:55:22,176 --> 00:55:24,345 an infinite amount of monkeys banging on typewriters? 1548 00:55:24,387 --> 00:55:26,222 They will eventually write Shakespeare? 1549 00:55:26,263 --> 00:55:28,391 A-plus. Oh, boy, you are smart. 1550 00:55:28,432 --> 00:55:32,311 Or the most popular apps that money can buy. 1551 00:55:32,353 --> 00:55:34,397 Apps. They're writing apps. 1552 00:55:34,438 --> 00:55:36,023 -Cat Chat. -(cat meows) 1553 00:55:36,065 --> 00:55:37,358 Palm Doodle. 1554 00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:39,026 Ooh, Find My Nose. 1555 00:55:39,068 --> 00:55:40,444 -(Ted gasps) -Stock Crush. 1556 00:55:40,486 --> 00:55:42,029 -You did Stock Crush? -(cash register dings) 1557 00:55:42,071 --> 00:55:43,698 I love Stock Crush. 1558 00:55:43,739 --> 00:55:46,617 All us. But my next app... 1559 00:55:46,659 --> 00:55:49,370 ooh, it's gonna change the world. 1560 00:55:49,412 --> 00:55:50,454 Forever. 1561 00:55:50,496 --> 00:55:51,789 So why bother with a school? 1562 00:55:51,831 --> 00:55:54,333 You could go public and make millions. 1563 00:55:54,375 --> 00:55:56,085 Oh. (laughs) 1564 00:55:56,127 --> 00:55:58,462 -Billions. -Billions. 1565 00:55:58,504 --> 00:56:01,549 Yeah, but some things are more important than money. 1566 00:56:01,590 --> 00:56:03,217 Please don't say "love." 1567 00:56:03,259 --> 00:56:05,428 Mmm. Power. 1568 00:56:05,469 --> 00:56:07,638 That's more like it. 1569 00:56:08,597 --> 00:56:10,474 TIM: Wow. This is so amazing. 1570 00:56:10,516 --> 00:56:13,227 First, the ride, and now a-a full sit-down dinner. 1571 00:56:13,269 --> 00:56:14,937 Wow. What a palace. 1572 00:56:14,979 --> 00:56:17,356 -I mean, you have electricity? -Well, yeah. 1573 00:56:17,398 --> 00:56:19,525 Man, you guys are beyond generous. 1574 00:56:19,567 --> 00:56:21,569 You're welcome anytime. 1575 00:56:21,610 --> 00:56:23,195 -(groans) -CAROL: Tabitha, would you mind 1576 00:56:23,237 --> 00:56:24,864 -setting the table? -Okay, Mom. 1577 00:56:24,905 --> 00:56:27,116 Really? You're just gonna throw that right there, huh? 1578 00:56:27,158 --> 00:56:28,284 (gasps) 1579 00:56:28,325 --> 00:56:30,911 Psst. Psst. Daddy. 1580 00:56:30,953 --> 00:56:32,788 -Shh! It's Marcos. -What are you doing here? 1581 00:56:32,830 --> 00:56:34,373 -Where's Uncle Ted? -What? 1582 00:56:34,415 --> 00:56:35,416 He kicked me off the mission. 1583 00:56:35,458 --> 00:56:36,375 He can't do that. 1584 00:56:36,417 --> 00:56:37,418 Only I can do that. 1585 00:56:37,460 --> 00:56:38,627 You're back on the mission. 1586 00:56:38,669 --> 00:56:40,087 No need. I have my own mission now. 1587 00:56:40,129 --> 00:56:42,381 What? What could be more important than my mission? 1588 00:56:42,423 --> 00:56:44,592 Got to go. Lightspeed out. 1589 00:56:45,801 --> 00:56:47,261 This is so great. (chuckles) 1590 00:56:47,303 --> 00:56:48,846 Well, I hope you're hungry. 1591 00:56:48,888 --> 00:56:50,556 Been so long since I've used silverware. (chuckles) 1592 00:56:50,598 --> 00:56:53,059 So, how'd you like your first day? 1593 00:56:53,100 --> 00:56:54,435 Kind of intense. 1594 00:56:54,477 --> 00:56:56,437 (chuckles): Yeah. You'll get used to it. 1595 00:56:56,479 --> 00:56:57,980 -Even that Nathan kid? -Nathan. 1596 00:56:58,022 --> 00:57:00,232 -Ugh. He's a mess. -(chuckles): Yeah. 1597 00:57:00,274 --> 00:57:02,443 -He is such a square. -A square? 1598 00:57:02,485 --> 00:57:04,445 Uh, yeah, you know, like a dork. 1599 00:57:04,487 --> 00:57:06,364 Dweeb. Nerdlet. A real poindexter. 1600 00:57:06,405 --> 00:57:07,907 Lame-o. Dorkus to the max. 1601 00:57:07,948 --> 00:57:09,742 (chuckles) They used to call me. 1602 00:57:09,784 --> 00:57:12,244 -(chuckles) You're weird. -I am? 1603 00:57:12,286 --> 00:57:14,288 Yeah, but in a good way. 1604 00:57:14,330 --> 00:57:15,790 (both chuckle) 1605 00:57:15,831 --> 00:57:18,376 So, why is the pageant stressing you out so much? 1606 00:57:18,417 --> 00:57:20,503 (groans) I have to sing. 1607 00:57:20,544 --> 00:57:22,713 -So what? -I don't know. 1608 00:57:22,755 --> 00:57:25,091 My whole family is going to be there, 1609 00:57:25,132 --> 00:57:27,259 including my dad. 1610 00:57:27,301 --> 00:57:28,803 Oh. 1611 00:57:28,844 --> 00:57:30,221 Right. 1612 00:57:30,262 --> 00:57:32,306 You're embarrassed of him? 1613 00:57:32,348 --> 00:57:34,392 No. No, it's not that. 1614 00:57:34,433 --> 00:57:35,935 (Tim sighs heavily) 1615 00:57:35,976 --> 00:57:37,728 It's just, he's really good at this kind of thing-- 1616 00:57:37,770 --> 00:57:41,524 being creative and using your imagination-- 1617 00:57:41,565 --> 00:57:43,567 but it's hard for me. 1618 00:57:43,609 --> 00:57:45,820 I just want him to be proud of me. 1619 00:57:45,861 --> 00:57:47,154 You know? 1620 00:57:47,196 --> 00:57:49,156 (coos) 1621 00:57:49,198 --> 00:57:50,157 Really? 1622 00:57:50,199 --> 00:57:52,868 Well, yeah. 1623 00:57:53,828 --> 00:57:55,996 Um, who are these extra plates for? 1624 00:57:56,038 --> 00:57:57,832 -(doorbell rings) -(whispers): Mom and Dad. 1625 00:57:57,873 --> 00:57:59,750 Hey, hey! The key still works! 1626 00:57:59,792 --> 00:58:01,293 You guys should really change the locks. 1627 00:58:01,335 --> 00:58:02,878 -Oh, you made it. -Look who's here! 1628 00:58:02,920 --> 00:58:03,671 Mom and Dad. 1629 00:58:03,713 --> 00:58:04,839 TABITHA: Grandma! Grandpa! 1630 00:58:04,880 --> 00:58:06,632 -TED SR.: There she is. -(gasps) 1631 00:58:06,674 --> 00:58:08,134 -Come here, my little tabby cat. -Yay! You're here! 1632 00:58:08,175 --> 00:58:10,219 -Look at how big you are. -You're almost a teenager. 1633 00:58:10,261 --> 00:58:11,637 Can you vote yet? 1634 00:58:11,679 --> 00:58:12,888 TABITHA: Ten and a half more years, Grandma. 1635 00:58:12,930 --> 00:58:14,140 Daddy, they're gonna recognize you. 1636 00:58:14,181 --> 00:58:15,307 No, no. It's fine. 1637 00:58:15,349 --> 00:58:17,226 I've got the glasses. See? 1638 00:58:17,268 --> 00:58:18,686 -TED SR. and TABITHA: Selfie! -How do you do it again? 1639 00:58:18,728 --> 00:58:19,979 Bring out the baby. 1640 00:58:20,021 --> 00:58:21,564 -Hide! -Where are you hiding that baby? 1641 00:58:21,605 --> 00:58:22,982 No. Just be cool. Be cool. 1642 00:58:23,024 --> 00:58:24,525 -JANICE: There she is. -TED SR.: Hello. 1643 00:58:24,567 --> 00:58:25,776 TED SR.: Hey, who's the new guy? 1644 00:58:25,818 --> 00:58:27,695 -That's Marcos. -I gotcha. 1645 00:58:27,737 --> 00:58:30,948 (babies clamoring) 1646 00:58:30,990 --> 00:58:33,284 Attention, babies. Bienvenue. 1647 00:58:33,325 --> 00:58:35,036 Willkommen. 1648 00:58:35,077 --> 00:58:36,412 Dobro pozhalovat'. 1649 00:58:36,454 --> 00:58:39,165 -And namaste. -(clamoring continues) 1650 00:58:39,206 --> 00:58:41,125 Uh, babies. 1651 00:58:41,167 --> 00:58:42,460 Hey, hey. 1652 00:58:42,501 --> 00:58:43,919 -No more screen time. -(clamoring stops) 1653 00:58:43,961 --> 00:58:46,297 -(whimpering) -ARMSTRONG: Listen. 1654 00:58:46,338 --> 00:58:49,592 Believe it or not, I used to be just like you. 1655 00:58:49,633 --> 00:58:52,219 -(cooing) -Yes. I even had parents. 1656 00:58:52,261 --> 00:58:55,639 Mine were child psychologists 1657 00:58:55,681 --> 00:58:58,142 who made me part of an experiment. 1658 00:58:58,184 --> 00:58:59,393 Really? 1659 00:58:59,435 --> 00:59:02,063 They exposed me to 10,000 hours 1660 00:59:02,104 --> 00:59:05,649 -of Mozart, language lessons and public radio. -Huh. Wow. 1661 00:59:05,691 --> 00:59:07,443 I hate public radio. 1662 00:59:07,485 --> 00:59:10,988 It was at that point I realized I was smarter than my parents. 1663 00:59:11,030 --> 00:59:14,992 And with my first step, I ran away from home. 1664 00:59:15,034 --> 00:59:17,244 -(babies moan sadly) -Why? 1665 00:59:17,286 --> 00:59:19,080 They pushed me around. 1666 00:59:19,121 --> 00:59:21,248 I got told what to do all the time. 1667 00:59:21,290 --> 00:59:22,416 (crying) 1668 00:59:22,458 --> 00:59:25,461 But a single word changed my life. 1669 00:59:25,503 --> 00:59:27,088 "No." Say it. 1670 00:59:27,129 --> 00:59:28,422 ALL: No! 1671 00:59:28,464 --> 00:59:30,424 -Take a nap. -Nyet! 1672 00:59:30,466 --> 00:59:32,343 -Put on your coat. -Nein! 1673 00:59:32,385 --> 00:59:34,720 -Eat your vegetables. -Nahii! 1674 00:59:34,762 --> 00:59:37,014 Are you gonna let grown-ups push you around? 1675 00:59:37,056 --> 00:59:39,392 No, no! No, no, no! No, no! No, no, no! 1676 00:59:39,433 --> 00:59:40,768 -Are you? -Good God, no. 1677 00:59:40,810 --> 00:59:42,103 That's right. 1678 00:59:42,144 --> 00:59:45,106 Why do parents get to be in charge, anyway? 1679 00:59:45,147 --> 00:59:47,525 They had their chance, and what did we get? 1680 00:59:47,566 --> 00:59:51,696 Pollution, politics, wars. 1681 00:59:51,737 --> 00:59:54,073 BABIES: Ooh. 1682 00:59:54,115 --> 00:59:56,117 Not "ooh." "Boo." 1683 00:59:56,158 --> 00:59:57,743 ALL: Boo! 1684 00:59:57,785 --> 01:00:01,122 The only thing holding us back is them, 1685 01:00:01,163 --> 01:00:02,790 but not anymore. 1686 01:00:02,832 --> 01:00:06,711 The moment that we've worked so hard for is almost here. 1687 01:00:06,752 --> 01:00:07,878 -B-Day. -(babies cheering) 1688 01:00:07,920 --> 01:00:09,130 -B-Day? -B-Day. 1689 01:00:09,171 --> 01:00:11,257 -I'm this many. -I'm this many. 1690 01:00:11,298 --> 01:00:13,634 No, no, it's not... it's not your birthday. 1691 01:00:13,676 --> 01:00:16,512 It's the beginning of the baby revolution. 1692 01:00:16,554 --> 01:00:18,347 -Yay, yay. -(babies cheering) 1693 01:00:18,389 --> 01:00:21,016 And there'll be cake. Cake for everybody. 1694 01:00:21,058 --> 01:00:23,811 BABIES (chanting): Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake! 1695 01:00:23,853 --> 01:00:25,438 -No more rules. -(chanting continues) 1696 01:00:25,479 --> 01:00:27,314 Oh là là! 1697 01:00:27,356 --> 01:00:29,066 No more parents. 1698 01:00:29,108 --> 01:00:30,317 Uh-oh. 1699 01:00:30,359 --> 01:00:31,485 Pew, pew, pew, pew! 1700 01:00:31,527 --> 01:00:33,988 Sayonara, Mama and Papa! 1701 01:00:34,030 --> 01:00:36,032 -Oh, this is bad. -(chuckles) 1702 01:00:36,073 --> 01:00:37,950 All right, pep rally's over. 1703 01:00:37,992 --> 01:00:40,369 Your-your parents are gonna pick you up. 1704 01:00:40,411 --> 01:00:41,454 (crying) 1705 01:00:41,495 --> 01:00:42,997 This is my life's work. 1706 01:00:43,039 --> 01:00:45,958 Oh, yes, 17 long months. 1707 01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:48,586 To... no more parents. (laughs) 1708 01:00:48,627 --> 01:00:50,254 Mmm. (gargles, slurps) 1709 01:00:50,296 --> 01:00:52,715 Cheers to the revolution. 1710 01:00:53,674 --> 01:00:55,384 -No. Nope. Nope. -(Tabitha chuckles) 1711 01:00:55,426 --> 01:00:57,261 -No. Oh, that's a keeper. -TABITHA: Oh, Tina. 1712 01:00:57,303 --> 01:00:59,388 Oh, it's so cute. What's the app called? 1713 01:00:59,430 --> 01:01:00,848 -It's called QT Snap. -Oh. 1714 01:01:00,890 --> 01:01:02,808 -Show me how to download that. -Everyone has it. 1715 01:01:02,850 --> 01:01:04,852 So, Marcos... Lightspeed? 1716 01:01:04,894 --> 01:01:06,479 -Is that what you said? -Mm-hmm. 1717 01:01:06,520 --> 01:01:08,314 Sounds like a cartoon name. 1718 01:01:08,356 --> 01:01:09,523 (laughing) 1719 01:01:09,565 --> 01:01:11,359 -It really does. -(laughs awkwardly) 1720 01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:14,320 Well, my parents, they're a little wacky, so... 1721 01:01:14,362 --> 01:01:15,946 (slurping) 1722 01:01:15,988 --> 01:01:18,699 Huh. It's like I know you from somewhere. 1723 01:01:18,741 --> 01:01:20,076 I don't think so. 1724 01:01:20,117 --> 01:01:21,744 -That is a keeper, too. -Hey. Hey. 1725 01:01:21,786 --> 01:01:23,788 -Doesn't he look familiar? -I don't think I do. 1726 01:01:23,829 --> 01:01:25,247 Yeah, he looks just like Tim. 1727 01:01:25,289 --> 01:01:26,874 Yeah. You look like Tim. 1728 01:01:26,916 --> 01:01:29,085 -(coughs) -Hmm? -Huh? 1729 01:01:29,126 --> 01:01:30,628 Except Tim didn't wear glasses. 1730 01:01:30,669 --> 01:01:32,797 Oh, that's right. (scoffs) 1731 01:01:32,838 --> 01:01:35,299 Huh. Well, how about that. 1732 01:01:35,341 --> 01:01:37,885 -(Tina sighs) -Hey, where is Tim, anyway? 1733 01:01:37,927 --> 01:01:39,720 Tim and Ted are on a trip. 1734 01:01:39,762 --> 01:01:41,931 -TED SR. and JANICE: Together? -They're bonding. 1735 01:01:41,972 --> 01:01:44,016 -Well, that's about time. -Yeah. 1736 01:01:44,058 --> 01:01:46,227 I just hope Tim's back in time for the pageant. 1737 01:01:46,268 --> 01:01:47,728 -(Janice scoffs) -(Ted Sr. chuckles) 1738 01:01:47,770 --> 01:01:50,690 Uh, why... why wouldn't he be there? 1739 01:01:50,731 --> 01:01:52,733 -(laughs) Tim Time. -Tim Time. 1740 01:01:52,775 --> 01:01:53,776 -JANICE: Oh. (chuckles) -(Carol laughs) 1741 01:01:53,818 --> 01:01:54,902 What's-what's Tim Time? 1742 01:01:54,944 --> 01:01:56,404 -Go ahead. -Okay. 1743 01:01:56,445 --> 01:02:00,366 Well, Marcos, Tim Time is like a black hole 1744 01:02:00,408 --> 01:02:04,829 where things like reality and being on time get lost. 1745 01:02:04,870 --> 01:02:06,288 -(Tabitha laughs) -Oh. 1746 01:02:06,330 --> 01:02:09,083 Tabitha's father has a very active imagination. 1747 01:02:09,125 --> 01:02:10,835 Which is a good thing. 1748 01:02:10,876 --> 01:02:12,545 Yeah, that's a... I'd say that's a good thing. 1749 01:02:12,586 --> 01:02:15,923 Oh, remember when he said our boss was trying to kidnap us? 1750 01:02:15,965 --> 01:02:17,466 -He did? -(laughter) 1751 01:02:17,508 --> 01:02:20,052 TED SR.: Or that his baby brother could walk and talk 1752 01:02:20,094 --> 01:02:21,721 but only when we weren't looking. 1753 01:02:21,762 --> 01:02:23,055 (laughter) 1754 01:02:23,097 --> 01:02:24,974 ("William TellOverture" playing) 1755 01:02:25,015 --> 01:02:27,852 (chuckling): Wow. Turn around. 1756 01:02:29,395 --> 01:02:31,063 TABITHA: That's so Dad. 1757 01:02:31,105 --> 01:02:33,774 You know, Ted was quite a handful himself. 1758 01:02:33,816 --> 01:02:36,110 -Oh, he could be very... -TED SR.: Uptight. 1759 01:02:36,152 --> 01:02:37,903 JANICE: Mm. Yes. High-strung. 1760 01:02:37,945 --> 01:02:40,322 Oh. Remember the time he sued us? 1761 01:02:40,364 --> 01:02:43,075 -(laughter) -JANICE: Teenagers. Ugh. 1762 01:02:43,117 --> 01:02:45,327 He really looked up to his big brother, though. 1763 01:02:45,369 --> 01:02:47,496 -BOTH: He did? -JANICE: Oh, yeah. 1764 01:02:47,538 --> 01:02:49,331 He wouldn't leave him alone. 1765 01:02:49,373 --> 01:02:50,958 Everything Tim did, Teddy wanted to do. 1766 01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:52,501 -TABITHA: Really? -Yeah. 1767 01:02:52,543 --> 01:02:54,628 -Tagalong Teddy, we called him. -(Tabitha chuckles) 1768 01:02:54,670 --> 01:02:56,797 -JANICE: Well, not to his face. -TED SR.: No, no. 1769 01:02:56,839 --> 01:02:59,050 Not to his face. He was very litigious. 1770 01:02:59,091 --> 01:03:01,302 But you know what? Your dad didn't mind. 1771 01:03:01,343 --> 01:03:03,345 He was so proud of his little brother. 1772 01:03:03,387 --> 01:03:05,181 -Oh, yeah. -He loved showing him off. 1773 01:03:05,222 --> 01:03:07,892 TED SR.: Those guys did everything together. 1774 01:03:07,933 --> 01:03:09,977 JANICE: They were best friends. 1775 01:03:10,019 --> 01:03:11,729 -Just like you and me. -(Tina giggling) 1776 01:03:11,771 --> 01:03:13,481 Right, Tina? 1777 01:03:13,522 --> 01:03:14,815 Best friends forever. 1778 01:03:14,857 --> 01:03:16,150 -Tickle monster! -(Carol chuckles) 1779 01:03:16,192 --> 01:03:18,319 CAROL: That's so sweet. 1780 01:03:26,035 --> 01:03:27,495 TABITHA: And this is my closet. 1781 01:03:27,536 --> 01:03:29,330 -TIM: Oh, cool closet. -And this is my bed. 1782 01:03:29,372 --> 01:03:31,290 -And this is my fish. -(tapping) 1783 01:03:31,332 --> 01:03:35,044 -Hey, want to see something really, really cool? -Sure. 1784 01:03:36,045 --> 01:03:38,005 I made this vocalizer for Dr. Hawking. 1785 01:03:38,047 --> 01:03:39,799 Hey, my old... 1786 01:03:39,840 --> 01:03:41,759 -What did you do?! -Check this out. 1787 01:03:41,801 --> 01:03:43,928 Say hello, Dr. Hawking. 1788 01:03:44,845 --> 01:03:46,847 ROBOTIC VOICE: Hell-l-l-l-l... 1789 01:03:46,889 --> 01:03:50,518 (grunts) Um, he has performance anxiety. 1790 01:03:50,559 --> 01:03:51,936 Mm-hmm. Yep. 1791 01:03:51,977 --> 01:03:53,604 Oh, this is Lamb Lamb. 1792 01:03:53,646 --> 01:03:55,147 Hey, Lamb Lamb. 1793 01:03:55,189 --> 01:03:57,858 That's my galaxy model right up there on my shelf. 1794 01:03:57,900 --> 01:04:00,069 My scientist of the week award. 1795 01:04:00,111 --> 01:04:01,946 -Wow. -My geode rock collection. 1796 01:04:01,987 --> 01:04:03,531 And my telescope. 1797 01:04:03,572 --> 01:04:04,699 Sweet. 1798 01:04:04,740 --> 01:04:07,034 -Hey, cool guitar. -Yeah. 1799 01:04:07,076 --> 01:04:08,077 That's my dad's. 1800 01:04:08,119 --> 01:04:09,954 Cool dad. (grunts) 1801 01:04:09,995 --> 01:04:11,247 Are you okay? 1802 01:04:11,288 --> 01:04:13,541 Yeah, I'm a lot taller in my mind. 1803 01:04:13,582 --> 01:04:16,752 Hey, if you want, I can help you with your song. 1804 01:04:16,794 --> 01:04:19,046 No, you can't. 1805 01:04:19,088 --> 01:04:20,715 -Your ears will bleed. -Oh, please. 1806 01:04:20,756 --> 01:04:22,383 It'll be fun. 1807 01:04:22,425 --> 01:04:24,969 How about this one? It's a classic. 1808 01:04:25,010 --> 01:04:27,054 (sighs) Do we have to? 1809 01:04:27,096 --> 01:04:29,390 Come on. Let's try. 1810 01:04:30,391 --> 01:04:32,143 Okay. 1811 01:04:33,185 --> 01:04:34,770 It's not gonna be good, though. 1812 01:04:34,812 --> 01:04:35,938 No judgment. 1813 01:04:35,980 --> 01:04:37,481 We're just having fun. 1814 01:04:37,523 --> 01:04:39,608 (playing gentle melody) 1815 01:04:42,445 --> 01:04:46,490 (off-key): * There's no place like home * 1816 01:04:46,532 --> 01:04:48,659 * For the holidays * 1817 01:04:48,701 --> 01:04:50,619 ROBOTIC VOICE: Please stop. 1818 01:04:50,661 --> 01:04:54,248 -No, stop. Aah...! -* 'Cause no matter * 1819 01:04:54,290 --> 01:04:56,917 * How far away you roam... * 1820 01:04:56,959 --> 01:04:58,335 (stops playing) 1821 01:04:58,377 --> 01:05:00,087 Good... try. 1822 01:05:00,129 --> 01:05:02,757 Ugh! I just get so nervous. 1823 01:05:02,798 --> 01:05:04,759 (chuckles): That's okay. 1824 01:05:04,800 --> 01:05:07,261 Listen, all you got to do 1825 01:05:07,303 --> 01:05:10,264 is imagine that you're inside the song. 1826 01:05:10,306 --> 01:05:14,101 Everything in the lyrics is actually happening to you. 1827 01:05:14,143 --> 01:05:17,271 And you can see the notes. 1828 01:05:17,313 --> 01:05:20,232 (playing "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out") 1829 01:05:22,151 --> 01:05:25,821 TIM: * Well, if you want to sing out, sing out * 1830 01:05:25,863 --> 01:05:29,408 * And if you want to be free, be free * 1831 01:05:29,450 --> 01:05:32,787 -Wow. Whoa! -* 'Cause there's a million things to be * 1832 01:05:32,828 --> 01:05:35,456 -* You know that there are * -Whoa. Marcos, wait up. 1833 01:05:35,498 --> 01:05:37,208 -Come on. -(grunts) 1834 01:05:37,249 --> 01:05:39,460 -* And if you want to sing high, sing high * -(whimpering) 1835 01:05:39,502 --> 01:05:41,462 -That's a little too high. -* And if you want * 1836 01:05:41,504 --> 01:05:43,464 -* To sing low, sing low * -Whoa. 1837 01:05:43,506 --> 01:05:45,132 I got you. 1838 01:05:45,174 --> 01:05:47,385 -* 'Cause there's a million ways to go * -(gasps) 1839 01:05:47,426 --> 01:05:49,136 * You know that there are * 1840 01:05:49,178 --> 01:05:50,554 OMG, that's a lot. 1841 01:05:50,596 --> 01:05:51,680 (screams) 1842 01:05:51,722 --> 01:05:54,517 * Uh-huh, it's easy * 1843 01:05:54,558 --> 01:05:57,019 -* Uh-huh * -(screams, laughs) 1844 01:05:57,061 --> 01:05:59,647 * You only need to try * 1845 01:05:59,689 --> 01:06:01,440 (screams, laughs) 1846 01:06:01,482 --> 01:06:03,359 (yelling) 1847 01:06:03,401 --> 01:06:05,569 * You can sing what you want * 1848 01:06:05,611 --> 01:06:07,196 Whoo! Yeah, this is fun! 1849 01:06:07,238 --> 01:06:10,408 -* The opportunity's yours * -(whooping) 1850 01:06:10,449 --> 01:06:13,494 * And if you do it your way * 1851 01:06:13,536 --> 01:06:14,829 Whoa. 1852 01:06:14,870 --> 01:06:17,164 * You can do it today * 1853 01:06:17,206 --> 01:06:20,042 Marcos, wait. Where are you? 1854 01:06:20,084 --> 01:06:21,669 Come on. You can do it. 1855 01:06:21,711 --> 01:06:24,547 -I can't. I can't. -(audience cheering) 1856 01:06:24,588 --> 01:06:27,174 * * 1857 01:06:27,216 --> 01:06:28,342 (gasps softly) 1858 01:06:28,384 --> 01:06:30,177 (audience murmuring quietly) 1859 01:06:30,219 --> 01:06:32,471 (panting nervously) 1860 01:06:33,723 --> 01:06:37,017 -Now go for it. -(audience chattering) 1861 01:06:37,059 --> 01:06:38,853 -* Ah-ah-ah * -(chatter stops) 1862 01:06:38,894 --> 01:06:41,105 * * 1863 01:06:41,147 --> 01:06:43,649 Whoa. (chuckles) 1864 01:06:46,402 --> 01:06:47,570 Hey. 1865 01:06:47,611 --> 01:06:49,655 * It's easy * 1866 01:06:49,697 --> 01:06:51,073 * Ah-ah-ah * 1867 01:06:51,115 --> 01:06:54,702 * You only need to try * 1868 01:06:54,744 --> 01:06:56,454 TABITHA: All right. My turn. 1869 01:06:56,495 --> 01:06:58,414 TIM: Here we go. It's all you. 1870 01:06:58,456 --> 01:07:01,375 * Well, if I want to sing out, sing out * 1871 01:07:01,417 --> 01:07:03,085 -* Sing out * -Yes, let it out. 1872 01:07:03,127 --> 01:07:05,004 * And if I want to be free, be free * 1873 01:07:05,046 --> 01:07:06,380 * Be free * 1874 01:07:06,422 --> 01:07:08,591 * 'Cause there's a million things to be * 1875 01:07:08,632 --> 01:07:10,968 * I know that there are, I know that there are * 1876 01:07:11,010 --> 01:07:13,429 -* I know that there are * -* You know that there are * 1877 01:07:13,471 --> 01:07:16,390 -* I know that there are... * -* You know that there are... * 1878 01:07:16,432 --> 01:07:19,977 -* I know that there are * -* You know that there are * 1879 01:07:20,019 --> 01:07:24,106 * I know that there are. * 1880 01:07:27,777 --> 01:07:30,154 Wow. That was so great. 1881 01:07:30,196 --> 01:07:31,697 No, you were so great. 1882 01:07:31,739 --> 01:07:32,865 Thanks, Marcos. 1883 01:07:32,907 --> 01:07:34,283 -(camera clicks) -What? 1884 01:07:34,325 --> 01:07:35,743 -Oh, that's a keeper. -Oh, they can see us. 1885 01:07:35,785 --> 01:07:36,952 -They can see us. -Aw. 1886 01:07:36,994 --> 01:07:38,245 Guys, come on. 1887 01:07:38,287 --> 01:07:40,414 Stop. No, do it. Do it. 1888 01:07:40,456 --> 01:07:42,375 (chuckling): Oh, no. 1889 01:07:42,416 --> 01:07:44,668 Parents, right? (chuckles) 1890 01:07:44,710 --> 01:07:46,921 -Bye, Templeton family! -CAROL: Bye-bye. 1891 01:07:46,962 --> 01:07:48,589 -Bye, Marcos. -Lightspeed. 1892 01:07:48,631 --> 01:07:49,632 Weird kid. 1893 01:07:49,673 --> 01:07:51,342 JANICE: Yeah, I don't like him. 1894 01:07:51,384 --> 01:07:53,719 (guitar playing softly) 1895 01:07:53,761 --> 01:07:56,347 * Catch my eye * 1896 01:07:57,139 --> 01:07:59,809 * Take my hand * 1897 01:08:00,643 --> 01:08:02,311 * This bond is tighter than we * 1898 01:08:02,353 --> 01:08:04,021 You go get 'em, Tabitha. 1899 01:08:04,063 --> 01:08:06,190 * Ever planned * 1900 01:08:06,232 --> 01:08:09,068 * Give me courage * 1901 01:08:09,110 --> 01:08:10,695 * So I can land... * 1902 01:08:10,736 --> 01:08:12,279 TINA: Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, 1903 01:08:12,321 --> 01:08:13,781 pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, 1904 01:08:13,823 --> 01:08:15,950 pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up. Choo-choo! 1905 01:08:15,991 --> 01:08:18,285 Don't they understand it's the fate of the world? 1906 01:08:18,327 --> 01:08:20,371 I've been on hold forever! 1907 01:08:20,413 --> 01:08:22,456 CHILD: All operators are currently napping. 1908 01:08:22,498 --> 01:08:25,000 I've been on hold so long I got a tooth growing in. 1909 01:08:25,042 --> 01:08:27,461 Back in my day, we wrote memos. 1910 01:08:27,503 --> 01:08:29,088 That's cute and old-timey. 1911 01:08:29,130 --> 01:08:30,423 (scoffs) 1912 01:08:30,464 --> 01:08:32,466 TED: I weep for the future. 1913 01:08:32,508 --> 01:08:34,969 Do you want to talk about your feelings now while I'm on hold? 1914 01:08:35,010 --> 01:08:36,137 I can give you 20 minutes. 1915 01:08:36,178 --> 01:08:37,430 No. 1916 01:08:37,471 --> 01:08:39,056 Let's get to the nut, the nugget. 1917 01:08:39,098 --> 01:08:40,558 What are you afraid of? 1918 01:08:40,599 --> 01:08:43,018 Sharks, getting shot in the head with an arrow, 1919 01:08:43,060 --> 01:08:44,437 and... the IRS. 1920 01:08:44,478 --> 01:08:45,980 -That's it. -There you go. 1921 01:08:46,022 --> 01:08:47,481 Was that so hard? Baby steps. 1922 01:08:47,523 --> 01:08:49,483 Now, what about being lonely? 1923 01:08:49,525 --> 01:08:51,360 -I'm not lonely. -Mm-hmm. 1924 01:08:51,402 --> 01:08:53,821 I'm just... alone. 1925 01:08:53,863 --> 01:08:55,322 There's a difference. 1926 01:08:55,364 --> 01:08:56,991 -I think it's time you read your file. -(gasps) 1927 01:08:57,033 --> 01:08:58,617 -Ah-ah-ah-ah. -Just give me. 1928 01:08:58,659 --> 01:09:00,036 Whoa. This is it? 1929 01:09:00,077 --> 01:09:02,538 It's so thin. 1930 01:09:02,580 --> 01:09:04,415 YOUNG TIM: Dear Boss Baby, 1931 01:09:04,457 --> 01:09:06,042 I promise you this: 1932 01:09:06,083 --> 01:09:08,753 Every morning when you wake up, I will be there. 1933 01:09:08,794 --> 01:09:11,505 Every night at dinner, I will be there. 1934 01:09:11,547 --> 01:09:13,924 Every birthday party, every Christmas morning, 1935 01:09:13,966 --> 01:09:15,426 I will be there. 1936 01:09:15,468 --> 01:09:18,846 Year after year after year. 1937 01:09:18,888 --> 01:09:23,809 And you and I will always be brothers. 1938 01:09:23,851 --> 01:09:25,728 Always. 1939 01:09:25,770 --> 01:09:28,522 Makes me want to make a sad face. 1940 01:09:28,564 --> 01:09:30,775 (toy train whistle blows) 1941 01:09:33,277 --> 01:09:35,529 We were just kids. 1942 01:09:35,571 --> 01:09:38,115 We didn't know anything about the real world. 1943 01:09:38,157 --> 01:09:40,659 And eventually, you have to grow up. 1944 01:09:40,701 --> 01:09:42,912 Just because you grow up, it doesn't mean 1945 01:09:42,953 --> 01:09:44,455 you have to grow apart. 1946 01:09:44,497 --> 01:09:47,124 I don't know. Maybe it's already too late. 1947 01:09:47,166 --> 01:09:49,126 TIM (grunting): Hey. 1948 01:09:49,168 --> 01:09:50,378 Sorry I'm late. 1949 01:09:50,419 --> 01:09:51,962 TINA: Daddy! 1950 01:09:52,004 --> 01:09:53,172 Daddy, Daddy. 1951 01:09:53,214 --> 01:09:54,423 What's going on? 1952 01:09:54,465 --> 01:09:55,925 Uncle Ted really misses you. 1953 01:09:55,966 --> 01:09:58,302 -Isn't that nice? -(toy train whistle blows) 1954 01:10:01,097 --> 01:10:03,891 So, hey, uh, what you doing? 1955 01:10:03,933 --> 01:10:05,351 Oh, I was, uh... 1956 01:10:05,393 --> 01:10:08,604 I don't know, I was just working on this. 1957 01:10:08,646 --> 01:10:10,439 (gasps) 1958 01:10:12,858 --> 01:10:15,653 Look, I'm sorry about what I said at recess. 1959 01:10:15,695 --> 01:10:18,280 What happens on the playground stays on the playground. 1960 01:10:18,322 --> 01:10:20,199 I was just worried about Tabitha, you know? 1961 01:10:20,241 --> 01:10:21,575 She's your daughter. I get it. 1962 01:10:21,617 --> 01:10:23,285 This whole time, I was thinking about 1963 01:10:23,327 --> 01:10:25,663 what I wanted and not what she needed. 1964 01:10:25,705 --> 01:10:27,832 I think I finally got this parenting thing figured out. 1965 01:10:27,873 --> 01:10:28,999 Gold star for you, Daddy. 1966 01:10:29,041 --> 01:10:30,668 -Keep it up, Pops. -Yeah, well, about that. 1967 01:10:30,710 --> 01:10:33,796 Armstrong wants to get rid of parents somehow. 1968 01:10:33,838 --> 01:10:36,132 -Sorry, what? -He's planning a baby revolution. 1969 01:10:36,173 --> 01:10:37,675 Ugh, come on. 1970 01:10:37,717 --> 01:10:39,927 Just when I got good at this whole parenting thing. 1971 01:10:39,969 --> 01:10:41,429 We got to stop him. 1972 01:10:41,470 --> 01:10:43,013 -Not we. -You? 1973 01:10:43,055 --> 01:10:44,390 Neither one of us. 1974 01:10:44,432 --> 01:10:46,058 -BabyCorp is taking it from here. -Ah. 1975 01:10:46,100 --> 01:10:48,227 So, what, they're gonna send in the Baby SEALS or something? 1976 01:10:48,269 --> 01:10:49,770 -Looks like it. -So you'll, um... 1977 01:10:49,812 --> 01:10:52,148 you'll be headed back to your office. 1978 01:10:52,189 --> 01:10:54,442 TED: Uh, yeah. Well, keep in touch, Tim. 1979 01:10:54,483 --> 01:10:56,277 Hello? BabyCorp? 1980 01:10:56,318 --> 01:10:58,279 Thank goodness, BabyCorp. Well, BabyCo... 1981 01:10:58,320 --> 01:11:00,531 (stammering): Wha-What? What are you saying, 1982 01:11:00,573 --> 01:11:02,533 there's not enough evidence, BabyCorp? I... 1983 01:11:02,575 --> 01:11:04,368 -Uh-oh. -So you're not gonna do anything? 1984 01:11:04,410 --> 01:11:05,786 But, BabyCorp, I... 1985 01:11:05,828 --> 01:11:07,496 Ugh. Well, then we'll take care of it. 1986 01:11:07,538 --> 01:11:09,290 You know what, BabyCorp? 1987 01:11:09,331 --> 01:11:10,708 I quit! 1988 01:11:10,750 --> 01:11:12,835 What a bunch of diaper sniffers. (grunts) 1989 01:11:12,877 --> 01:11:14,587 (whistle blows, train powers down) 1990 01:11:14,628 --> 01:11:16,797 Looks like we have to stop Armstrong ourselves. 1991 01:11:16,839 --> 01:11:19,383 We're going rogue. I like it. 1992 01:11:19,425 --> 01:11:21,052 -So the mission's back on? -Yeah. 1993 01:11:21,093 --> 01:11:23,846 If you two can put up with each other a little longer. 1994 01:11:23,888 --> 01:11:27,141 I suppose I can live with that. Tim? 1995 01:11:27,183 --> 01:11:28,142 I think that's doable. 1996 01:11:28,184 --> 01:11:29,143 Yay! 1997 01:11:29,185 --> 01:11:30,603 Forced together again. 1998 01:11:30,644 --> 01:11:33,397 WIZZIE: It's 8:45 p.m. 1999 01:11:33,439 --> 01:11:35,483 TED: Okay. Our clock is ticking. 2000 01:11:35,524 --> 01:11:38,611 We have to stop Armstrong before the formula wears off. 2001 01:11:38,652 --> 01:11:42,031 Working as a team, we will strike at the pageant. 2002 01:11:42,073 --> 01:11:43,324 Go, Tina. 2003 01:11:43,366 --> 01:11:45,659 Now, this top secret document... 2004 01:11:45,701 --> 01:11:47,161 Sweetie, it's the program. 2005 01:11:47,203 --> 01:11:49,497 This top secret program reveals 2006 01:11:49,538 --> 01:11:52,500 that Armstrong is scheduled to address the audience, 2007 01:11:52,541 --> 01:11:55,586 which he will do right here at the very end. 2008 01:11:55,628 --> 01:11:58,214 We need someone backstage. Tim, that's you. 2009 01:11:58,255 --> 01:12:00,883 How am I gonna get backstage if I'm not in the pageant? 2010 01:12:00,925 --> 01:12:02,760 TED: My people will take care of that. 2011 01:12:02,802 --> 01:12:03,594 (toy squeaks) 2012 01:12:03,636 --> 01:12:05,012 -Ah! -Thank you. 2013 01:12:05,054 --> 01:12:06,180 -(chuckles) -Thank you. 2014 01:12:06,222 --> 01:12:07,264 -No! -Great. 2015 01:12:07,306 --> 01:12:09,350 -And... go. -(laughing) 2016 01:12:09,392 --> 01:12:10,810 Glue. 2017 01:12:10,851 --> 01:12:12,686 (screams) 2018 01:12:12,728 --> 01:12:15,022 ROBOT VOICE: There, there. All better. 2019 01:12:15,064 --> 01:12:16,649 Awesome. 2020 01:12:16,691 --> 01:12:20,111 Now, I'll be your eyes and your ears in the audience. 2021 01:12:20,152 --> 01:12:22,029 I can't let Mommy see me talk, 2022 01:12:22,071 --> 01:12:23,948 or she's gonna start squealing and hugging me, 2023 01:12:23,989 --> 01:12:25,700 but these little doodads will let you 2024 01:12:25,741 --> 01:12:27,535 understand my baby talk. 2025 01:12:27,576 --> 01:12:29,203 It's called a GAGA device. 2026 01:12:29,245 --> 01:12:30,579 -Aw, that's cute. -Check it out. 2027 01:12:30,621 --> 01:12:31,872 (speaks gibberish) 2028 01:12:31,914 --> 01:12:33,124 (over GAGA): Can you hear me, Daddy? 2029 01:12:33,165 --> 01:12:34,375 Also cute. 2030 01:12:34,417 --> 01:12:36,460 Meanwhile, with my new purple status, 2031 01:12:36,502 --> 01:12:38,504 I can stay close to Armstrong. 2032 01:12:38,546 --> 01:12:40,548 Um, that's-that's an eyebrow. 2033 01:12:40,589 --> 01:12:42,550 -Oh. Sorry. -Uh, no, that's, uh... 2034 01:12:42,591 --> 01:12:44,301 TED: When the moment is right, 2035 01:12:44,343 --> 01:12:45,928 I'll implant a device. 2036 01:12:45,970 --> 01:12:47,430 -Got it. -Got what? 2037 01:12:47,471 --> 01:12:48,639 I mean, you've got this. 2038 01:12:48,681 --> 01:12:50,683 Go get 'em, tiger. (chuckles) 2039 01:12:50,725 --> 01:12:52,643 -Oh, thank you, parents. -(applause) 2040 01:12:52,685 --> 01:12:54,061 Thank you. There's the... 2041 01:12:54,103 --> 01:12:56,063 There's the old enthusiasm I like to see. 2042 01:12:56,105 --> 01:12:58,441 TINA: This will allow me to control his suit. 2043 01:12:58,482 --> 01:13:01,902 I can make Muttonchops do whatever I want. 2044 01:13:01,944 --> 01:13:03,779 (babbling) 2045 01:13:03,821 --> 01:13:06,198 TINA: I can make him dance. 2046 01:13:06,240 --> 01:13:07,908 I can make him prance. 2047 01:13:07,950 --> 01:13:09,744 -Hey, no, no, no, no. -Including exposing himself 2048 01:13:09,785 --> 01:13:11,579 -to the audience. -(audience gasps) 2049 01:13:11,620 --> 01:13:14,373 -(screams) -Every parent will pull out their phone. 2050 01:13:14,415 --> 01:13:16,751 Don't look at me. Don't look at me! 2051 01:13:16,792 --> 01:13:19,378 The photos will spread like a diaper rash. 2052 01:13:19,420 --> 01:13:21,255 Cut to our pizza party. 2053 01:13:21,297 --> 01:13:23,215 Boom! Bam! Poo! Poof! 2054 01:13:23,257 --> 01:13:24,425 Questions? 2055 01:13:24,467 --> 01:13:25,634 After Tabitha sings her solo, right? 2056 01:13:25,676 --> 01:13:27,136 After Tabitha sings. 2057 01:13:27,178 --> 01:13:30,806 Now we just sit back, relax and enjoy the show. 2058 01:13:32,058 --> 01:13:33,601 (fanfare playing) 2059 01:13:33,642 --> 01:13:36,103 ARMSTRONG: Welcome, parents, to our holiday pageant. 2060 01:13:36,145 --> 01:13:39,607 Remember, flash photography in the auditorium 2061 01:13:39,648 --> 01:13:42,276 is absolutely okay. 2062 01:13:42,318 --> 01:13:45,071 Take a picture. Show your kids that you love 'em. 2063 01:13:45,112 --> 01:13:46,614 Yippee! 2064 01:13:46,655 --> 01:13:47,990 Come on, Tim. 2065 01:13:48,032 --> 01:13:50,284 -You promised you'd be here. -(man groans) 2066 01:13:50,326 --> 01:13:51,786 Oh, sorry. This seat is taken. 2067 01:13:51,827 --> 01:13:53,746 -Yep. Sorry. -Oh, no. (mutters) 2068 01:13:53,788 --> 01:13:55,998 -So sorry. I... Sorry. -(man grunts, mutters) 2069 01:13:56,040 --> 01:13:58,125 -Sorry! I am so sorry. -(speaking gibberish) 2070 01:13:58,167 --> 01:14:00,461 (over GAGA): Uncle Teddy, are you in position? 2071 01:14:00,503 --> 01:14:01,837 The baby's in the cradle. 2072 01:14:01,879 --> 01:14:04,507 -The baby's in the cradle. -Mmm. (slurping) 2073 01:14:04,548 --> 01:14:06,133 (speaking gibberish) 2074 01:14:06,175 --> 01:14:08,135 (over GAGA): Papa Bear, can you read me? 2075 01:14:08,177 --> 01:14:09,762 The flake has landed. 2076 01:14:09,804 --> 01:14:11,847 Places! Places, everybody! 2077 01:14:11,889 --> 01:14:13,224 -Here we go. Here we go. -Oh, my gosh. 2078 01:14:13,265 --> 01:14:15,142 -It's starting. It's starting. -(sighs) Finally. 2079 01:14:15,184 --> 01:14:16,727 It's starting. It's starting. 2080 01:14:16,769 --> 01:14:18,020 Yay! 2081 01:14:18,062 --> 01:14:20,147 -You're a big pageant guy, huh? -No, no, no. 2082 01:14:20,189 --> 01:14:22,692 I'm not talking about the show. I'm talking about B-Day. 2083 01:14:23,526 --> 01:14:24,902 B-Day? 2084 01:14:24,944 --> 01:14:27,279 Oh, yeah. It's already in the parents' phones. 2085 01:14:27,321 --> 01:14:29,031 (coughs) 2086 01:14:29,073 --> 01:14:30,825 I taught babies to code. 2087 01:14:30,866 --> 01:14:33,536 TED: Apps. They're writing apps. 2088 01:14:33,577 --> 01:14:35,746 But my next app... 2089 01:14:35,788 --> 01:14:39,333 ooh, it's gonna change the world forever. 2090 01:14:39,375 --> 01:14:44,004 QT Snap is the app that's going to change the world forever? 2091 01:14:44,046 --> 01:14:47,007 Forever starts today. (chuckles) 2092 01:14:47,049 --> 01:14:49,051 Uh, cool. (gasps) 2093 01:14:49,093 --> 01:14:51,470 (audience gasping) 2094 01:14:51,512 --> 01:14:54,140 * * 2095 01:14:54,181 --> 01:14:55,683 AUDIENCE: Aw. 2096 01:14:55,725 --> 01:14:57,226 -KIDS: * It's wintertime * -(Tim mumbling) 2097 01:14:57,268 --> 01:14:58,853 * It's the best time of year * 2098 01:14:58,894 --> 01:15:00,771 * But due to ice caps melting * 2099 01:15:00,813 --> 01:15:02,857 * Global warming's here * 2100 01:15:02,898 --> 01:15:04,692 * It feels like summer * 2101 01:15:04,734 --> 01:15:06,694 * The snow has disappeared * 2102 01:15:06,736 --> 01:15:08,362 * It's all our parents' fault * 2103 01:15:08,404 --> 01:15:11,282 -* So we're all doomed * -TIM: * All, uh... * 2104 01:15:11,323 --> 01:15:12,742 * Doomed. * 2105 01:15:12,783 --> 01:15:14,368 This is kind of dark. 2106 01:15:14,410 --> 01:15:15,703 Did the kids just say we're doomed? 2107 01:15:15,745 --> 01:15:17,705 What the heck are we watching? 2108 01:15:17,747 --> 01:15:19,790 -(camera clicks) -(yelps) 2109 01:15:19,832 --> 01:15:21,542 Their brains are turning to mush. 2110 01:15:21,584 --> 01:15:23,085 Months of hypnotic research embedded 2111 01:15:23,127 --> 01:15:25,921 in the most user-friendly photo app ever made. 2112 01:15:25,963 --> 01:15:27,548 Ooh. 2113 01:15:27,590 --> 01:15:29,633 Now all we need to do is sit back, relax 2114 01:15:29,675 --> 01:15:31,385 and enjoy the show. 2115 01:15:31,427 --> 01:15:32,762 -WOMAN: Hey! -Right. 2116 01:15:32,803 --> 01:15:34,930 (chuckles) I'll be right back. We're, uh... 2117 01:15:34,972 --> 01:15:36,599 -WOMAN: Hey! -...out of Dundle Floofers. 2118 01:15:36,640 --> 01:15:37,975 -(chuckles) -Mmm. 2119 01:15:38,017 --> 01:15:39,560 (chuckling) 2120 01:15:39,602 --> 01:15:41,062 KIDS: Diwali! 2121 01:15:41,103 --> 01:15:42,938 (traditional Hindu music playing) 2122 01:15:42,980 --> 01:15:44,565 Las Posadas! 2123 01:15:44,607 --> 01:15:46,901 (mariachi music playing) 2124 01:15:46,942 --> 01:15:49,070 -Agnostic! -(music stops) 2125 01:15:50,279 --> 01:15:52,615 -And Hanukkah! -(screams) 2126 01:15:52,656 --> 01:15:53,949 Your son is so talented. 2127 01:15:53,991 --> 01:15:56,243 -Oh, so is yours. -Liars. 2128 01:15:56,285 --> 01:15:58,746 Tina, come in. B-Day is happening now. 2129 01:15:58,788 --> 01:16:00,289 It's all in the phones. 2130 01:16:00,331 --> 01:16:03,292 Armstrong is using an app to brainwash the parents. 2131 01:16:03,334 --> 01:16:05,336 -(gasps) -(over GAGA): Gasp. 2132 01:16:05,378 --> 01:16:07,588 -TED: We have to stop the show. -(speaking gibberish) 2133 01:16:07,630 --> 01:16:09,173 (over GAGA): Okay, okay. Uh, there's a... 2134 01:16:09,215 --> 01:16:11,717 there's a big old no-touchy switch backstage. 2135 01:16:11,759 --> 01:16:13,094 (speaking gibberish) 2136 01:16:13,135 --> 01:16:14,762 (over GAGA): Daddy, we have to pull the plug. 2137 01:16:14,804 --> 01:16:17,014 Daddy, come in. Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, 2138 01:16:17,056 --> 01:16:18,432 Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy. 2139 01:16:18,474 --> 01:16:20,393 Ugh. He's not responding. 2140 01:16:20,434 --> 01:16:21,727 (panting): Of course not. 2141 01:16:21,769 --> 01:16:23,896 -I'll do it myself. -Stop! 2142 01:16:23,938 --> 01:16:26,774 -(grunts) -Theater kids only. 2143 01:16:26,816 --> 01:16:29,110 Oh, come on, nativity! 2144 01:16:29,151 --> 01:16:30,486 Look holier! 2145 01:16:30,528 --> 01:16:31,946 (angelic choir vocalizing) 2146 01:16:31,987 --> 01:16:33,531 (gasps) 2147 01:16:33,572 --> 01:16:35,950 TIM: Hey, Tabitha. 2148 01:16:35,991 --> 01:16:37,868 (chuckling): Don't you worry, okay? 2149 01:16:37,910 --> 01:16:39,787 You're gonna be great. 2150 01:16:39,829 --> 01:16:42,081 Thanks, Marcos. And thanks for all your help. 2151 01:16:42,123 --> 01:16:43,207 Anytime. 2152 01:16:43,249 --> 01:16:45,292 I feel like you really understand me. 2153 01:16:45,334 --> 01:16:46,961 I'm so excited. 2154 01:16:47,002 --> 01:16:50,756 I can't wait to see the look on my dad's face when I sing. 2155 01:16:51,716 --> 01:16:53,634 MEGHAN: Hey! You're on, Templeton! 2156 01:16:53,676 --> 01:16:54,969 Wish me luck. 2157 01:16:55,010 --> 01:16:56,387 MEGHAN: And break a leg. 2158 01:16:56,429 --> 01:16:57,930 Or two, for that matter. (laughs) 2159 01:16:57,972 --> 01:17:01,559 KIDS: * We're in this together * 2160 01:17:01,600 --> 01:17:04,145 * We live in harmony... * 2161 01:17:04,186 --> 01:17:05,396 TED: Psst. 2162 01:17:06,355 --> 01:17:07,481 Tim! 2163 01:17:07,523 --> 01:17:08,733 Is that the baby Jesus? 2164 01:17:08,774 --> 01:17:10,026 (gasps) 2165 01:17:10,067 --> 01:17:11,277 (screams) 2166 01:17:11,318 --> 01:17:12,987 (laughing) 2167 01:17:13,029 --> 01:17:14,238 * * 2168 01:17:14,280 --> 01:17:17,825 * We have to shut down the pageant. * 2169 01:17:17,867 --> 01:17:19,744 -Yeah! -What? No. Why? 2170 01:17:19,785 --> 01:17:22,163 Armstrong's turning the parents into zombies 2171 01:17:22,204 --> 01:17:23,873 so they'll do whatever he wants. 2172 01:17:23,914 --> 01:17:26,000 What? What are you doing? No! 2173 01:17:26,042 --> 01:17:27,418 -(grunts) -(chair crashes) 2174 01:17:27,460 --> 01:17:28,794 Tabitha's on next. 2175 01:17:28,836 --> 01:17:30,796 TED: You'd risk the future of the world 2176 01:17:30,838 --> 01:17:32,840 -to see your daughter sing? -Yes! 2177 01:17:32,882 --> 01:17:34,925 -I have to be there for her. -Look who's worried about 2178 01:17:34,967 --> 01:17:36,552 showing up for things all of a sudden. 2179 01:17:36,594 --> 01:17:38,179 What's that supposed to mean? 2180 01:17:38,220 --> 01:17:39,847 You didn't even come to my graduation. 2181 01:17:39,889 --> 01:17:41,307 Ow! Which one? 2182 01:17:41,348 --> 01:17:43,768 Business school, law school. None of them. 2183 01:17:43,809 --> 01:17:45,519 You didn't even come to my wedding. 2184 01:17:45,561 --> 01:17:47,271 -Which one? -I only had one! 2185 01:17:47,313 --> 01:17:48,939 We had a deal, Tim. 2186 01:17:48,981 --> 01:17:50,858 You promised you'd be there always. 2187 01:17:50,900 --> 01:17:52,443 Whoa. Where did you... 2188 01:17:52,485 --> 01:17:55,071 -Breach of contract! -(grunts) 2189 01:17:55,905 --> 01:17:57,698 (ninja babies whooping) 2190 01:17:57,740 --> 01:17:58,866 Whoa. 2191 01:17:58,908 --> 01:18:00,201 -Whoa! -Whoa! 2192 01:18:00,242 --> 01:18:02,620 ARMSTRONG: How do you do there, fellas? 2193 01:18:02,661 --> 01:18:05,581 (chuckles) Nothing's gonna ruin my B-Day. 2194 01:18:05,623 --> 01:18:08,167 Not even you. 2195 01:18:08,209 --> 01:18:10,044 -Oh, busted. -Yeah, it was obvious 2196 01:18:10,086 --> 01:18:11,670 from the very, very beginning 2197 01:18:11,712 --> 01:18:14,340 that you two were working together. 2198 01:18:14,382 --> 01:18:15,758 What gave us away? 2199 01:18:15,800 --> 01:18:18,052 Well, I'd say the bickering, 2200 01:18:18,094 --> 01:18:19,887 the, uh, petty disputes, 2201 01:18:19,929 --> 01:18:21,555 the jealousy. 2202 01:18:21,597 --> 01:18:24,725 You know, you two are brothers in every single way. 2203 01:18:24,767 --> 01:18:26,435 (hums a tune) 2204 01:18:26,477 --> 01:18:28,729 -Off to the Box they go. -(ninja babies yelling) 2205 01:18:28,771 --> 01:18:30,773 What? No. Not the Box. Not now. 2206 01:18:30,815 --> 01:18:32,400 Please. 2207 01:18:32,441 --> 01:18:34,402 Aw, it's just... it's too bad that you're never gonna 2208 01:18:34,443 --> 01:18:36,570 have a chance to reboot your relationship and... 2209 01:18:36,612 --> 01:18:38,531 -No! -...and restore the closeness 2210 01:18:38,572 --> 01:18:39,907 that you once felt. 2211 01:18:39,949 --> 01:18:41,575 -Sorry about that. -No. 2212 01:18:41,617 --> 01:18:43,828 -No, no, no, no. No! -Adios, Marcos. 2213 01:18:43,869 --> 01:18:46,914 * Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... * 2214 01:18:46,956 --> 01:18:48,791 CAROL: Oh, look, look. There she is. 2215 01:18:48,833 --> 01:18:49,959 There's our little angel. 2216 01:18:50,000 --> 01:18:51,877 -Oh! Tabby's in the tree. -Ah! Oh! 2217 01:18:53,379 --> 01:18:55,589 * Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh * 2218 01:18:55,631 --> 01:18:57,383 * Ooh-ooh-ooh... * 2219 01:18:57,425 --> 01:19:00,720 (ninja babies speaking gibberish, laughing) 2220 01:19:00,761 --> 01:19:02,430 (yells) 2221 01:19:02,471 --> 01:19:04,807 You had one job to do. 2222 01:19:04,849 --> 01:19:06,809 One job. 2223 01:19:06,851 --> 01:19:08,811 -Oh, no. -The fountain. 2224 01:19:08,853 --> 01:19:10,479 It's flooding the room. 2225 01:19:10,521 --> 01:19:11,856 This isn't a time-out. 2226 01:19:11,897 --> 01:19:13,274 It's game over. 2227 01:19:13,315 --> 01:19:15,359 * Ooh-ooh * 2228 01:19:15,401 --> 01:19:17,695 * Ooh-ooh-ooh * 2229 01:19:17,737 --> 01:19:20,489 (panting) 2230 01:19:23,075 --> 01:19:24,452 MEGHAN: Psst. 2231 01:19:24,493 --> 01:19:28,080 It's one, two, three and one, two, three. 2232 01:19:28,122 --> 01:19:30,332 -(gasps, pants) -(piano playing) 2233 01:19:39,467 --> 01:19:41,969 * Catch my eye * 2234 01:19:42,011 --> 01:19:45,139 * Take my hand * 2235 01:19:45,181 --> 01:19:50,478 * This bond is tighter than we ever planned * 2236 01:19:50,519 --> 01:19:52,855 * Give me courage * 2237 01:19:52,897 --> 01:19:55,316 * So I can land * 2238 01:19:55,358 --> 01:19:58,861 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2239 01:19:58,903 --> 01:20:02,948 * So together we stand * 2240 01:20:03,908 --> 01:20:06,869 * Laugh and cry with me * 2241 01:20:06,911 --> 01:20:09,538 * Fly that high with me * 2242 01:20:09,580 --> 01:20:11,707 -* See the sunset and the sunrise * -(gasping) 2243 01:20:11,749 --> 01:20:14,377 -* The world looks so good through our eyes * -Wow. 2244 01:20:14,418 --> 01:20:19,382 * Like the moon and stars at night * 2245 01:20:21,008 --> 01:20:23,052 You're right. I blew it. 2246 01:20:23,094 --> 01:20:25,179 I ruined the mission. (sighs) 2247 01:20:25,221 --> 01:20:27,098 And I'm a terrible father. 2248 01:20:27,139 --> 01:20:30,101 Hey, you did sort of ruin the mission. 2249 01:20:30,142 --> 01:20:31,727 But you're a great dad. 2250 01:20:31,769 --> 01:20:33,187 No, I'm not. 2251 01:20:33,229 --> 01:20:34,814 I could never do your job. 2252 01:20:34,855 --> 01:20:36,399 I mean, you work around the clock, 2253 01:20:36,440 --> 01:20:38,109 you can't even quit if you wanted to, 2254 01:20:38,150 --> 01:20:39,735 and you don't even get paid. 2255 01:20:39,777 --> 01:20:42,113 Frankly, I don't see how that's legal. 2256 01:20:42,154 --> 01:20:44,281 I was always jealous of you. 2257 01:20:44,323 --> 01:20:46,742 I wanted to be successful, too, you know. 2258 01:20:46,784 --> 01:20:48,077 Sure, Tim. 2259 01:20:48,119 --> 01:20:50,454 I made a lot of money... 2260 01:20:50,496 --> 01:20:52,581 but you made a family. 2261 01:20:53,666 --> 01:20:55,710 The truth is... 2262 01:20:55,751 --> 01:20:57,670 it's lonely at the top. 2263 01:21:01,006 --> 01:21:03,718 * Reach with me * 2264 01:21:03,759 --> 01:21:07,054 * See the sky * 2265 01:21:07,096 --> 01:21:11,809 * I'll always be here for the rest of your life * 2266 01:21:11,851 --> 01:21:14,812 * Sail that ocean * 2267 01:21:14,854 --> 01:21:17,231 * Find that sand * 2268 01:21:17,273 --> 01:21:20,818 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2269 01:21:20,860 --> 01:21:24,864 * So together we stand * 2270 01:21:24,905 --> 01:21:27,116 (kids vocalizing) 2271 01:21:30,286 --> 01:21:34,206 You know, I'm... I'm sorry we don't see each other anymore. 2272 01:21:34,248 --> 01:21:36,250 A very wise person once told me, 2273 01:21:36,292 --> 01:21:38,085 just because you grow up 2274 01:21:38,127 --> 01:21:40,087 doesn't mean you have to grow apart. 2275 01:21:40,129 --> 01:21:41,630 -Was it Tina? -Oh, yeah. 2276 01:21:41,672 --> 01:21:44,592 (laughing): Oh, it is crazy how smart she is. 2277 01:21:44,633 --> 01:21:46,844 It's like she looks right into your soul. 2278 01:21:46,886 --> 01:21:49,764 I'm sorry that I missed your graduations. 2279 01:21:49,805 --> 01:21:52,475 I'm sorry I missed your one wedding. 2280 01:21:52,516 --> 01:21:55,770 BOTH: I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. 2281 01:21:55,811 --> 01:21:58,689 * Side by side * 2282 01:21:58,731 --> 01:22:01,359 * Hand in hand * 2283 01:22:01,400 --> 01:22:06,238 * We speak a language no one else can understand * 2284 01:22:06,280 --> 01:22:09,200 -* Hear those cheers * -(cameras clicking) 2285 01:22:09,241 --> 01:22:11,494 * Strike up the band * 2286 01:22:11,535 --> 01:22:15,998 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2287 01:22:16,040 --> 01:22:23,214 * So together we stand. * 2288 01:22:25,883 --> 01:22:27,051 (chuckles) 2289 01:22:27,093 --> 01:22:29,136 (panting) 2290 01:22:32,765 --> 01:22:34,767 (pants, whimpers) 2291 01:22:34,809 --> 01:22:37,186 (one person clapping) 2292 01:22:38,896 --> 01:22:41,524 (hyperventilating) 2293 01:22:41,565 --> 01:22:43,818 (crying) 2294 01:22:43,859 --> 01:22:45,861 Oh, Tabitha. 2295 01:22:45,903 --> 01:22:47,321 (gasps) Gramps? 2296 01:22:47,363 --> 01:22:49,031 Nana? Mom? 2297 01:22:49,073 --> 01:22:50,199 Oh, no! 2298 01:22:50,241 --> 01:22:52,118 -(grunts) -Oh, my gosh, Tabitha. 2299 01:22:52,159 --> 01:22:53,994 You did such a great job. 2300 01:22:54,036 --> 01:22:57,248 Well, that's just horribly rude of you all. 2301 01:22:57,289 --> 01:22:58,582 Come on, everybody. 2302 01:22:58,624 --> 01:23:02,461 Uh, how about a standing ovation? 2303 01:23:02,503 --> 01:23:05,423 -(laughs) Very good. -(Tina gasps) 2304 01:23:05,464 --> 01:23:07,049 They're zombies! 2305 01:23:07,091 --> 01:23:08,759 We did it! 2306 01:23:08,801 --> 01:23:12,680 -The baby revolution has begun. -(babies cheering, laughing) 2307 01:23:12,722 --> 01:23:15,015 No more need for costumes. 2308 01:23:15,057 --> 01:23:16,934 (yells, laughs) 2309 01:23:16,976 --> 01:23:19,145 Who wants cake? 2310 01:23:20,062 --> 01:23:21,522 Oh, my gosh. 2311 01:23:21,564 --> 01:23:24,108 ARMSTRONG: Happy B-Day, everybody. 2312 01:23:24,150 --> 01:23:26,152 Daddy, Uncle Ted. 2313 01:23:26,193 --> 01:23:27,737 Come in. Where are you? 2314 01:23:27,778 --> 01:23:30,072 (crying) 2315 01:23:31,699 --> 01:23:33,701 * * 2316 01:23:33,743 --> 01:23:36,037 (door opens, closes) 2317 01:23:36,078 --> 01:23:38,080 (sniffles) 2318 01:23:38,122 --> 01:23:40,082 TINA: Here you go, sis. 2319 01:23:40,124 --> 01:23:42,626 Now, I already used this, so I know it's safe. 2320 01:23:42,668 --> 01:23:44,420 Thanks. 2321 01:23:45,796 --> 01:23:48,340 Wait. Are you t-talking? 2322 01:23:48,382 --> 01:23:50,342 (chuckling): I know. It's pretty weird, isn't it? 2323 01:23:50,384 --> 01:23:52,595 (screams) Oh, my gosh, you're talking! 2324 01:23:52,636 --> 01:23:54,055 It's an emergency. 2325 01:23:54,096 --> 01:23:56,390 I'm on a supersecret mission from BabyCorp. 2326 01:23:56,432 --> 01:23:57,391 (gasps) 2327 01:23:57,433 --> 01:23:59,810 You mean Dad's stories are true? 2328 01:23:59,852 --> 01:24:01,729 That's what the suit says. 2329 01:24:01,771 --> 01:24:02,938 How do I look? 2330 01:24:02,980 --> 01:24:04,357 No way! 2331 01:24:04,398 --> 01:24:06,400 Now, I can't get ahold of Dad or Uncle Ted, 2332 01:24:06,442 --> 01:24:08,319 so I need your help, big sis. 2333 01:24:08,361 --> 01:24:09,945 Wait, wait. Dad's here? 2334 01:24:09,987 --> 01:24:11,447 They've been here the whole time. 2335 01:24:11,489 --> 01:24:13,407 -Where? -I don't have much time to explain, 2336 01:24:13,449 --> 01:24:15,785 but Dr. Armstrong is a baby. 2337 01:24:15,826 --> 01:24:17,745 A very bad, bad baby. 2338 01:24:17,787 --> 01:24:21,624 Soon, the world is gonna be our playground. 2339 01:24:21,665 --> 01:24:24,085 -Whee! (grunts) -("Push It" by Salt-N-Pepa playing) 2340 01:24:24,126 --> 01:24:25,461 (laughs) 2341 01:24:25,503 --> 01:24:27,838 Now we can make parents do whatever we want. 2342 01:24:27,880 --> 01:24:29,965 Awesome! Yeah! 2343 01:24:30,007 --> 01:24:32,927 No more rules. 2344 01:24:32,968 --> 01:24:35,638 Sayonara, Mama and Papa. 2345 01:24:35,679 --> 01:24:36,972 Yeah. 2346 01:24:37,014 --> 01:24:38,099 (babies laughing) 2347 01:24:38,140 --> 01:24:39,433 -Mom? -Dad? 2348 01:24:39,475 --> 01:24:40,434 Grandpa? 2349 01:24:40,476 --> 01:24:42,144 Whoa. Are you kidding me? 2350 01:24:42,186 --> 01:24:44,271 We need to shut it down before it goes global. 2351 01:24:44,313 --> 01:24:46,440 -ARMSTRONG: Yeah. (laughs) -What are we gonna do? 2352 01:24:46,482 --> 01:24:48,693 Okay, we need to find the big whatchamacallit 2353 01:24:48,734 --> 01:24:50,319 that controls the parents' phones. 2354 01:24:50,361 --> 01:24:51,862 -The server. -Yes. Yes. 2355 01:24:51,904 --> 01:24:54,031 Is there a big one of those whatsits at school? 2356 01:24:54,073 --> 01:24:55,616 Uh, let's see. 2357 01:24:55,658 --> 01:24:58,786 Well, servers get really hot, so you need air ducts. 2358 01:24:58,828 --> 01:25:00,121 TINA: Now you're thinking! 2359 01:25:00,162 --> 01:25:02,331 TABITHA: Which intersect at the acorn! 2360 01:25:02,373 --> 01:25:04,667 -A-plus! -Come on. 2361 01:25:04,709 --> 01:25:06,127 -This way. -(gasps) 2362 01:25:06,168 --> 01:25:08,379 Opportunity knocks. 2363 01:25:08,421 --> 01:25:10,965 First, we need to make a quick pit stop. 2364 01:25:11,006 --> 01:25:14,301 AUTOMATED VOICE (distorted): Your time has concluded. 2365 01:25:14,343 --> 01:25:16,470 -(both panting) -It looks like this is it, Tim. 2366 01:25:16,512 --> 01:25:18,806 Well, hey, at least we have 2367 01:25:18,848 --> 01:25:22,476 these last final precious moments together. 2368 01:25:23,686 --> 01:25:25,896 Precious. Precious! 2369 01:25:25,938 --> 01:25:28,357 (whistling) 2370 01:25:29,150 --> 01:25:30,901 -* * -(whinnies) 2371 01:25:32,111 --> 01:25:35,156 -Oh, right. Precious. Precious! -(continues whistling) 2372 01:25:35,197 --> 01:25:37,324 * * 2373 01:25:38,576 --> 01:25:40,703 -(Ted continues whistling) -(Tim sputtering) 2374 01:25:44,040 --> 01:25:46,459 (whistling and sputtering continue) 2375 01:25:47,960 --> 01:25:50,212 (banging on glass) 2376 01:25:55,760 --> 01:25:57,178 (both gasping) 2377 01:25:57,219 --> 01:25:58,804 (grunts) 2378 01:25:59,764 --> 01:26:00,931 (coughing) 2379 01:26:00,973 --> 01:26:01,932 (whinnies) 2380 01:26:01,974 --> 01:26:04,018 That's my girl. 2381 01:26:04,060 --> 01:26:05,186 Thank you. 2382 01:26:05,227 --> 01:26:07,188 (sputters, spits) 2383 01:26:07,229 --> 01:26:08,439 (gasps) Tina? 2384 01:26:08,481 --> 01:26:09,857 Tina, Tina, come in. It's Daddy. 2385 01:26:09,899 --> 01:26:12,234 Daddy! Listen, we have to shut down the server. 2386 01:26:12,276 --> 01:26:14,028 -It's in the acorn. -Whoa. 2387 01:26:14,070 --> 01:26:15,696 This is so weird. 2388 01:26:15,738 --> 01:26:16,989 I call shotgun. 2389 01:26:17,031 --> 01:26:18,074 Quick, to the acorn! 2390 01:26:18,115 --> 01:26:19,658 -TED: Hyah! -(neighing) 2391 01:26:20,826 --> 01:26:22,370 BOTH: Yeehaw! 2392 01:26:22,411 --> 01:26:24,205 Hold on to your chaps, pal. 2393 01:26:24,246 --> 01:26:25,289 -(ninja baby shouts) -Whoa! 2394 01:26:25,331 --> 01:26:27,583 (all whooping) 2395 01:26:30,920 --> 01:26:32,922 -(screams) -Oh, no! 2396 01:26:33,923 --> 01:26:36,050 Glue! (laughs) 2397 01:26:36,092 --> 01:26:38,552 Yah! Pixie dust! Aha. 2398 01:26:38,594 --> 01:26:39,970 -Yeah, baby. -Yes. -(whinnies) 2399 01:26:40,012 --> 01:26:42,306 (babbling) 2400 01:26:42,348 --> 01:26:43,933 (eerie chuckling) 2401 01:26:43,974 --> 01:26:45,851 (shouts) 2402 01:26:45,893 --> 01:26:47,812 (eerie chuckling) 2403 01:26:47,853 --> 01:26:49,230 Wha...? 2404 01:26:49,271 --> 01:26:51,440 CREEPY GIRL: Where'd I go? 2405 01:26:52,274 --> 01:26:54,568 -Whoa! -I like your pajamas. 2406 01:26:54,610 --> 01:26:55,444 (screams) 2407 01:26:55,486 --> 01:26:58,739 (ninja babies crying) 2408 01:26:58,781 --> 01:27:00,449 Where are you going? 2409 01:27:00,491 --> 01:27:01,909 -Hyah! -(whooping) 2410 01:27:01,951 --> 01:27:03,786 -Glue. -TED: I'm proud to be a yellow. 2411 01:27:03,828 --> 01:27:05,079 I like your pony. 2412 01:27:05,121 --> 01:27:06,122 (both scream) 2413 01:27:06,163 --> 01:27:07,415 Thank you. 2414 01:27:07,456 --> 01:27:09,417 -(crying) -ARMSTRONG (over radio): What? 2415 01:27:09,458 --> 01:27:12,336 Ah, ah, ah. No, no, no. 2416 01:27:14,046 --> 01:27:16,132 (whirring) 2417 01:27:16,173 --> 01:27:19,385 Now let's crack that big nut. (grunts) 2418 01:27:20,261 --> 01:27:22,555 Oh, no. It's about to go worldwide. 2419 01:27:22,596 --> 01:27:24,807 How are we gonna get up there? 2420 01:27:25,808 --> 01:27:27,518 -Really? -ARMSTRONG: Well, you got grit. 2421 01:27:27,560 --> 01:27:29,145 I'll give you that. 2422 01:27:29,186 --> 01:27:31,188 Gumption, even. Very admirable. 2423 01:27:31,230 --> 01:27:33,357 And yet, uh, annoying. 2424 01:27:33,399 --> 01:27:35,609 Quite annoying. Yeah. 2425 01:27:35,651 --> 01:27:38,195 I'm gonna have to, you know, uh, stop you. 2426 01:27:38,237 --> 01:27:39,447 Glue me, glue me, glue me. 2427 01:27:39,488 --> 01:27:40,990 Precious, sic him. 2428 01:27:41,032 --> 01:27:42,324 You're too little and too late. 2429 01:27:42,366 --> 01:27:44,452 -(clang) -Ah, ba-bad dog. 2430 01:27:44,493 --> 01:27:47,788 -Pets aren't allowed in school. -Aah! Precious! 2431 01:27:49,290 --> 01:27:50,958 And you, my pudgy protégé. 2432 01:27:51,000 --> 01:27:52,293 Go, go, go, go! Move! Move! 2433 01:27:52,334 --> 01:27:54,295 -I offered you the world. -(both yell) 2434 01:27:54,336 --> 01:27:55,755 -We could have been partners. -(groaning) 2435 01:27:55,796 --> 01:27:57,631 I've got something better than a partner. 2436 01:27:57,673 --> 01:27:59,717 -I have a brother. -Yeah! 2437 01:27:59,759 --> 01:28:01,927 -(grunts) Let go. -No, you let go. 2438 01:28:01,969 --> 01:28:04,138 Wow. Point taken. 2439 01:28:04,180 --> 01:28:05,848 What? What's going on? 2440 01:28:07,016 --> 01:28:09,226 (yelling) 2441 01:28:09,268 --> 01:28:10,478 Hey, that's my leisure suit. 2442 01:28:10,519 --> 01:28:11,896 It looks better on her. 2443 01:28:11,937 --> 01:28:13,397 Hands up, diapers down. 2444 01:28:13,439 --> 01:28:14,815 Things are about to get weird. 2445 01:28:14,857 --> 01:28:16,525 -Yeah, that's my girls! -(Ted laughs) 2446 01:28:16,567 --> 01:28:18,486 -That's really Dad? -Yep. 2447 01:28:18,527 --> 01:28:20,696 I said a lot of stuff to that kid. 2448 01:28:20,738 --> 01:28:22,490 Well, quite the family reunion. 2449 01:28:22,531 --> 01:28:23,949 Uh, the more the merrier. 2450 01:28:23,991 --> 01:28:26,118 -I say let's call your parents. -TIM: Oh, no. 2451 01:28:26,160 --> 01:28:27,495 (zombielike murmuring) 2452 01:28:27,536 --> 01:28:29,330 -Uh-oh. -Okay. 2453 01:28:29,372 --> 01:28:31,665 Mommy and Daddy, let's hug 'em-- to death. 2454 01:28:31,707 --> 01:28:33,584 Oh, don't worry about us. Get to the server. 2455 01:28:33,626 --> 01:28:35,503 -Go, Tina, go! -(whoops) 2456 01:28:35,544 --> 01:28:38,547 -(Armstrong stammering) -(Tina grunts, yells) 2457 01:28:38,589 --> 01:28:40,383 -Hey! -You got this, Tina. 2458 01:28:40,424 --> 01:28:41,759 Get down from there. 2459 01:28:41,801 --> 01:28:43,511 TED: Go for his lollies! 2460 01:28:43,552 --> 01:28:45,846 Never touch another man's pony. 2461 01:28:45,888 --> 01:28:46,931 (all grunt) 2462 01:28:46,972 --> 01:28:49,308 Here. Stick around. Stick around. 2463 01:28:49,350 --> 01:28:51,727 Uh, Tim, what do we do now?! 2464 01:28:51,769 --> 01:28:53,688 Don't move. Maybe they won't see us. 2465 01:28:53,729 --> 01:28:55,356 TED: They see us, Tim. They see us. 2466 01:28:55,398 --> 01:28:56,732 TIM: Did you move? I didn't move. 2467 01:28:56,774 --> 01:28:58,192 -TED: Really, Tim? -(grunting) 2468 01:28:58,234 --> 01:29:00,027 Oh. Hey, that's a little too high now. 2469 01:29:00,069 --> 01:29:02,863 Don't look down. Look straight ahead, okay? 2470 01:29:02,905 --> 01:29:04,740 (grunts, whimpers) 2471 01:29:04,782 --> 01:29:06,409 -(buzzer sounds) -It's locked. 2472 01:29:06,450 --> 01:29:08,202 Can I give you a hand? 2473 01:29:08,244 --> 01:29:09,495 Of course, I mean that facetiously, 2474 01:29:09,537 --> 01:29:12,206 because the hand acts as a... as a key. 2475 01:29:12,248 --> 01:29:13,541 No, no. No, no, no. 2476 01:29:13,582 --> 01:29:15,251 -Hey, hey. No, no, no, no. -Thanks, sis. 2477 01:29:15,292 --> 01:29:17,545 (grunts) Stay away from my server. 2478 01:29:17,586 --> 01:29:19,046 -(yells) -(grunts) 2479 01:29:19,088 --> 01:29:20,548 -Shut it down, Tabitha. -What are you doing? 2480 01:29:20,589 --> 01:29:22,466 What are you doing? No, no, no! No! 2481 01:29:22,508 --> 01:29:24,218 Don't do that. 2482 01:29:24,260 --> 01:29:25,594 -Oh, no! -(zombielike grunting) 2483 01:29:25,636 --> 01:29:27,221 -Hugs. -Hug Grandpa. 2484 01:29:27,263 --> 01:29:28,806 It's Night of the Living Boomers. 2485 01:29:28,848 --> 01:29:31,892 -Dad, stop! (screams) -ADULTS: Hugs. 2486 01:29:31,934 --> 01:29:32,977 (yells) 2487 01:29:33,018 --> 01:29:34,395 (grunts, gasps) 2488 01:29:34,437 --> 01:29:36,564 (groans) Back. Back, you little monsters. 2489 01:29:36,605 --> 01:29:38,983 -You back off, candy pants. -(yells, grunts) 2490 01:29:39,025 --> 01:29:40,151 (screams) 2491 01:29:40,192 --> 01:29:42,236 Ha! Got your nose. 2492 01:29:42,278 --> 01:29:43,612 (grunting) 2493 01:29:43,654 --> 01:29:46,073 Oh, right in the breadbasket! 2494 01:29:46,115 --> 01:29:48,242 (both grunting rapidly) 2495 01:29:48,284 --> 01:29:50,953 (both babbling) 2496 01:29:53,539 --> 01:29:54,790 -Ow! -Ha! 2497 01:29:54,832 --> 01:29:56,250 -Knocked his block off. -Ah, poopy. 2498 01:29:56,292 --> 01:29:58,085 Tina, I think I got it. Yes! 2499 01:29:58,127 --> 01:30:00,254 Don't hit that button. Don't hit that button. Aah! 2500 01:30:00,296 --> 01:30:02,089 Ow! Ooh! 2501 01:30:02,131 --> 01:30:04,800 -And... enter. -ARMSTRONG: No, no! Stop it! 2502 01:30:04,842 --> 01:30:06,844 -(screams) -Cut it out. (mutters) 2503 01:30:06,886 --> 01:30:09,638 -Look what you made me do. -(gasps) The fire alarm. 2504 01:30:09,680 --> 01:30:11,432 -ARMSTRONG: Darn it. -TABITHA: Dad! 2505 01:30:11,474 --> 01:30:13,809 Uncle Ted! Pull the fire alarm! 2506 01:30:13,851 --> 01:30:15,436 -The girls need help. -TED: No kissies! 2507 01:30:15,478 --> 01:30:17,730 The girls need us. (grunts) 2508 01:30:17,772 --> 01:30:20,566 -(alarm ringing) -(grunts) Time's up, halflings. 2509 01:30:20,608 --> 01:30:23,611 (sputters) Great galloping gargoyles! 2510 01:30:23,652 --> 01:30:27,114 -(Ted screaming) -WIZZIE: What? What? 2511 01:30:27,156 --> 01:30:29,367 Tim! Get to the fire alarm! 2512 01:30:29,408 --> 01:30:30,826 I'll hold them back. 2513 01:30:30,868 --> 01:30:33,120 TED: Make it rain, baby. 2514 01:30:33,162 --> 01:30:34,455 TIM: I'm on it. 2515 01:30:34,497 --> 01:30:35,915 What's the matter? 2516 01:30:35,956 --> 01:30:37,500 (voice cracks): You can't handle the awkward phase? 2517 01:30:37,541 --> 01:30:38,626 (whimpering) 2518 01:30:38,667 --> 01:30:41,003 Go, Marcos... uh, Dad. Go! 2519 01:30:41,045 --> 01:30:42,505 -(gasps) -I'm back! 2520 01:30:42,546 --> 01:30:44,006 -Here we go. -Come on. 2521 01:30:44,048 --> 01:30:46,133 How about another round, you tough guy? Come on! 2522 01:30:46,175 --> 01:30:47,551 Ow. Stop it. 2523 01:30:47,593 --> 01:30:48,969 I still got these. (grunting) 2524 01:30:49,011 --> 01:30:50,638 TABITHA: You put my sister down. 2525 01:30:50,679 --> 01:30:53,849 B-Day will happen, whether you like it or not. 2526 01:30:53,891 --> 01:30:56,143 -You shall not pass! -(zombielike murmuring) 2527 01:30:56,185 --> 01:30:58,062 Uh, you shall not pass. 2528 01:30:58,104 --> 01:30:59,772 No! Stop passing. 2529 01:30:59,814 --> 01:31:01,482 -(grunts) -(fire alarm ringing) 2530 01:31:01,524 --> 01:31:02,733 Yeah, Dad! 2531 01:31:02,775 --> 01:31:04,193 Way to go! (whoops) 2532 01:31:04,235 --> 01:31:06,320 -(alarm stops) -(Tabitha gasps) 2533 01:31:06,362 --> 01:31:07,905 TABITHA: That's it? 2534 01:31:07,947 --> 01:31:10,199 That's right. Why? What? The school's expensive. 2535 01:31:10,241 --> 01:31:13,327 -I had to cut costs someplace. -(both grunt) 2536 01:31:13,369 --> 01:31:14,495 Oh, no. It's not working. 2537 01:31:14,537 --> 01:31:15,663 Did you pull it right? 2538 01:31:15,705 --> 01:31:16,997 How else you gonna pull it? 2539 01:31:17,039 --> 01:31:19,041 ARMSTRONG (laughs): You'll see I'm right. 2540 01:31:19,083 --> 01:31:20,668 I'll show everybody. 2541 01:31:20,710 --> 01:31:23,838 The age of parents is over. 2542 01:31:23,879 --> 01:31:26,298 (babies cooing, murmuring) 2543 01:31:28,718 --> 01:31:31,178 ARMSTRONG: Yay, yay, yay. (sighs) 2544 01:31:31,220 --> 01:31:33,848 How about you watch me have a little toast? 2545 01:31:33,889 --> 01:31:37,143 To the baby revolution and to me. 2546 01:31:37,184 --> 01:31:38,602 (gasps) 2547 01:31:40,730 --> 01:31:42,648 -It's time for the candy volcano... -Mmm, mmm. 2548 01:31:42,690 --> 01:31:44,525 -Oh, that's good. -TABITHA and TINA: Of doom! 2549 01:31:44,567 --> 01:31:46,527 What are you doing? What are you doing? 2550 01:31:46,569 --> 01:31:48,029 No, no, no! No! 2551 01:31:48,070 --> 01:31:50,531 (yells) Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 2552 01:31:50,573 --> 01:31:52,199 -No, no, no. -Boom shakalaka? 2553 01:31:52,241 --> 01:31:53,868 -Boom! -Don't do that! 2554 01:31:53,909 --> 01:31:56,162 -(crackling, sizzling) -(screaming) 2555 01:31:56,203 --> 01:31:58,456 (both grunt) 2556 01:31:58,497 --> 01:32:00,750 -Whoa! -(screaming) 2557 01:32:00,791 --> 01:32:02,376 -(grunts) -TINA: Oh, no! 2558 01:32:02,418 --> 01:32:03,878 -Tabitha! -(Armstrong grunting) 2559 01:32:03,919 --> 01:32:04,879 (grunts) 2560 01:32:04,920 --> 01:32:06,756 No! Someone help me, please! 2561 01:32:06,797 --> 01:32:08,716 Tabitha, hang on! 2562 01:32:08,758 --> 01:32:11,052 Ted, I need upsies-- now. 2563 01:32:11,093 --> 01:32:12,803 (both grunt) 2564 01:32:12,845 --> 01:32:15,806 -(yelps, grunts) -(Tabitha screaming) 2565 01:32:17,558 --> 01:32:19,226 Dad, help me! 2566 01:32:19,268 --> 01:32:20,352 Look at you. 2567 01:32:20,394 --> 01:32:22,229 You're smart. You're strong. 2568 01:32:22,271 --> 01:32:23,564 You don't need parents. 2569 01:32:23,606 --> 01:32:25,608 What can they possibly offer you? 2570 01:32:25,649 --> 01:32:28,069 -How about unconditional love? -(gasps, yells) 2571 01:32:28,110 --> 01:32:29,820 -That's what. -No, no, no. No. 2572 01:32:29,862 --> 01:32:32,031 -Sayonara. -No, no, no. No. (screams) 2573 01:32:33,616 --> 01:32:36,243 -(grunts) -(Armstrong screams, whimpers) 2574 01:32:36,285 --> 01:32:37,620 TIM: Tabitha! 2575 01:32:37,661 --> 01:32:39,413 (strained grunting) 2576 01:32:39,455 --> 01:32:41,374 (yells) 2577 01:32:41,415 --> 01:32:43,042 -I'm gonna fall! -Tabitha! 2578 01:32:43,084 --> 01:32:44,251 Hang on! 2579 01:32:44,293 --> 01:32:45,628 (screams) 2580 01:32:45,669 --> 01:32:47,963 I got you. I got you. 2581 01:32:48,005 --> 01:32:49,799 (both sigh) 2582 01:32:49,840 --> 01:32:52,051 I got you, Tabitha. 2583 01:32:52,093 --> 01:32:54,678 (panting) 2584 01:32:54,720 --> 01:32:56,639 I got you. 2585 01:32:56,680 --> 01:32:59,183 That's my big brother. 2586 01:32:59,975 --> 01:33:02,978 Thanks, Marcos Lightspeed. 2587 01:33:05,022 --> 01:33:06,649 Mwah. 2588 01:33:07,483 --> 01:33:09,485 I thought we both had to grow up. 2589 01:33:09,527 --> 01:33:11,946 Well, let's not grow up too fast. 2590 01:33:11,987 --> 01:33:13,447 (sighs) 2591 01:33:13,489 --> 01:33:14,865 I love you, Dad. 2592 01:33:14,907 --> 01:33:16,784 I love you, Tabitha Templeton. 2593 01:33:16,826 --> 01:33:18,994 Aw. You see that? 2594 01:33:19,036 --> 01:33:21,288 And you wanted to take it all away. 2595 01:33:21,330 --> 01:33:22,790 -Where you going? -Home. 2596 01:33:22,832 --> 01:33:25,668 You know, Doc, childhood doesn't last forever, 2597 01:33:25,710 --> 01:33:27,545 but family sure does. 2598 01:33:27,586 --> 01:33:29,296 Uncle Ted! Heads up! 2599 01:33:29,338 --> 01:33:31,090 -(screams, grunts) -Woo-hoo! 2600 01:33:31,132 --> 01:33:33,467 We win! Get ready to order some pizzas. 2601 01:33:33,509 --> 01:33:35,761 (Ted chuckling) 2602 01:33:37,680 --> 01:33:39,974 * * 2603 01:33:42,727 --> 01:33:44,311 (babies gasping) 2604 01:33:44,353 --> 01:33:45,938 (cheering) 2605 01:33:45,980 --> 01:33:47,064 Woo-hoo! 2606 01:33:47,106 --> 01:33:49,233 -(squeals) -Cool! (laughs) 2607 01:33:50,359 --> 01:33:52,528 -(gasps) -(murmuring) 2608 01:33:52,570 --> 01:33:54,572 (Wizzie laughing) 2609 01:33:54,613 --> 01:33:57,033 Huzzah! (laughs) 2610 01:33:57,074 --> 01:33:59,118 Huzzah! 2611 01:34:01,370 --> 01:34:03,622 -(sighs, grunts) -(applause) 2612 01:34:03,664 --> 01:34:05,916 (cheering) 2613 01:34:08,210 --> 01:34:09,587 Oh, sweet. 2614 01:34:09,628 --> 01:34:11,672 He who findeth keepeth. 2615 01:34:11,714 --> 01:34:13,174 (clears throat) 2616 01:34:13,215 --> 01:34:14,258 (kids cheering) 2617 01:34:14,300 --> 01:34:17,720 Mommy, Daddy, I missed you so much. 2618 01:34:17,762 --> 01:34:20,139 Ooh, ooh, ooh. Yay! 2619 01:34:20,181 --> 01:34:21,348 Junior! 2620 01:34:21,390 --> 01:34:23,142 -Glue! -(Jimbo yelps) 2621 01:34:23,184 --> 01:34:25,269 So soft. 2622 01:34:25,311 --> 01:34:26,729 Where are we going? 2623 01:34:26,771 --> 01:34:28,022 Not bad, Templetons. 2624 01:34:28,064 --> 01:34:29,774 Woo-hoo! Yay, Templetons. 2625 01:34:29,815 --> 01:34:31,275 Yeah, mission accomplished. 2626 01:34:31,317 --> 01:34:34,445 And as a bonus, we stopped Armstrong, too. 2627 01:34:34,487 --> 01:34:35,988 -Huh? -What? 2628 01:34:36,030 --> 01:34:38,866 My real mission was getting you two back together. 2629 01:34:38,908 --> 01:34:41,702 -A-plus! See me after class. -(Tabitha chuckles) 2630 01:34:41,744 --> 01:34:43,454 Wait, so you never actually quit? 2631 01:34:43,496 --> 01:34:44,705 -Nope. -Huh. 2632 01:34:44,747 --> 01:34:45,873 Well played. 2633 01:34:45,915 --> 01:34:47,208 I don't like to mix the two, 2634 01:34:47,249 --> 01:34:48,751 but I will say it was never business. 2635 01:34:48,793 --> 01:34:50,294 It was always personal. 2636 01:34:50,336 --> 01:34:51,670 You know what, kid? 2637 01:34:51,712 --> 01:34:53,964 You're the best boss I ever had. 2638 01:34:54,006 --> 01:34:55,591 -Thank you, chief. -(Tabitha chuckles) 2639 01:34:55,633 --> 01:34:57,218 CAROL: Tim! You actually made it. 2640 01:34:57,259 --> 01:34:59,428 -Yeah. -I mean, I knew you'd make it. 2641 01:34:59,470 --> 01:35:01,097 -Teddy. -Teddy, you're here. 2642 01:35:01,138 --> 01:35:03,265 -And look what you're wearing. -Uh... 2643 01:35:03,307 --> 01:35:05,226 Sweetheart, I cried. 2644 01:35:05,267 --> 01:35:06,394 Then I went blank. 2645 01:35:06,435 --> 01:35:08,187 Oh, come on. Every-Everyone get together. 2646 01:35:08,229 --> 01:35:10,064 This... We got to get this. Here we go. 2647 01:35:10,106 --> 01:35:11,732 -Dad, no! -No! -What? 2648 01:35:11,774 --> 01:35:13,234 (camera clicks) 2649 01:35:13,275 --> 01:35:14,360 (guitar playing) 2650 01:35:14,402 --> 01:35:15,653 TABITHA: * We know that * 2651 01:35:15,695 --> 01:35:17,530 * Divided we'll fall * 2652 01:35:17,571 --> 01:35:22,952 * So together we stand * 2653 01:35:24,954 --> 01:35:27,748 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2654 01:35:27,790 --> 01:35:29,458 (camera clicks) 2655 01:35:29,500 --> 01:35:35,256 * So together we stand. * 2656 01:35:35,297 --> 01:35:37,133 -Yay, Tabitha! -That was beautiful! 2657 01:35:37,174 --> 01:35:39,135 -The crowd goes wild! -(Tina laughing) 2658 01:35:39,176 --> 01:35:41,429 (chuckles) Thank you. Thank you. 2659 01:35:41,470 --> 01:35:42,763 -(whinnies) -Aah! 2660 01:35:42,805 --> 01:35:44,432 Aw, hey, Precious. 2661 01:35:44,473 --> 01:35:45,808 (chuckles) You're amazing. 2662 01:35:45,850 --> 01:35:47,685 Oh, I wish Teddy could have been here. 2663 01:35:47,727 --> 01:35:49,770 Yeah, I know. Me, too. 2664 01:35:49,812 --> 01:35:51,605 -(doorbell rings) -(gasps) 2665 01:35:51,647 --> 01:35:53,482 -Hmm. -(squealing) 2666 01:35:55,651 --> 01:35:57,278 Hey, I was just... 2667 01:36:03,951 --> 01:36:05,911 TED: Merry Christmas, Tim. 2668 01:36:05,953 --> 01:36:08,122 I'm sorry I couldn't be there with you, 2669 01:36:08,164 --> 01:36:10,458 but please enjoy this 2670 01:36:10,499 --> 01:36:13,169 inappropriately lavish gift instead. 2671 01:36:18,841 --> 01:36:22,136 You've given me the greatest gift of all. 2672 01:36:22,178 --> 01:36:23,846 -You. -(chuckles) 2673 01:36:23,888 --> 01:36:27,308 Love, the best brother in the world. 2674 01:36:27,349 --> 01:36:29,643 P.S. Duck. 2675 01:36:29,685 --> 01:36:31,479 (shouts) 2676 01:36:31,520 --> 01:36:34,148 (groaning, spitting) 2677 01:36:34,190 --> 01:36:35,483 In your face, Leslie! 2678 01:36:35,524 --> 01:36:37,276 (chuckling): Hey. Oh, it is on, Lindsey! 2679 01:36:37,318 --> 01:36:39,779 -No. No, no, no, no. Don't, don't, don't. -Come here! 2680 01:36:39,820 --> 01:36:40,988 I'm younger than you. 2681 01:36:41,030 --> 01:36:42,406 You're a bigger target. 2682 01:36:42,448 --> 01:36:43,991 -(laughs) I got you so good! -(Ted grunts) 2683 01:36:44,033 --> 01:36:45,493 -(laughing) -TED: No, you didn't. 2684 01:36:45,534 --> 01:36:46,827 Aah! You missed me! 2685 01:36:46,869 --> 01:36:48,496 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 2686 01:36:48,537 --> 01:36:49,914 -Ambush. -Exactly. 2687 01:36:49,955 --> 01:36:51,374 -TIM: Ow! -TED: Sneak attack! 2688 01:36:51,415 --> 01:36:53,501 Oh, isn't it great to see them fighting again? 2689 01:36:53,542 --> 01:36:54,835 (sighs) Finally. 2690 01:36:54,877 --> 01:36:56,504 (toy phone ringing) 2691 01:36:57,838 --> 01:36:59,548 Shouldn't you pick up? 2692 01:36:59,590 --> 01:37:01,509 Nah, we got some family business. 2693 01:37:01,550 --> 01:37:03,052 Woo-hoo! Yeah! 2694 01:37:03,094 --> 01:37:05,221 -(Carol gasps) -(ringing continues) 2695 01:37:07,807 --> 01:37:10,393 CHILD (on phone): Tina, we have another assignment for you. 2696 01:37:10,434 --> 01:37:12,144 (gasps, whispers): I'm listening. 2697 01:37:12,186 --> 01:37:14,188 JANICE: Grandma's coming in hot! 2698 01:37:14,230 --> 01:37:16,774 -You want some of Grandpa? -Everyone, get Tagalong Teddy! 2699 01:37:16,816 --> 01:37:18,526 -TIM: It's true. -Gotcha! 2700 01:37:18,567 --> 01:37:20,236 You can't stop time. 2701 01:37:20,277 --> 01:37:22,613 But every once in a while, you get a second chance. 2702 01:37:22,655 --> 01:37:24,407 -TABITHA: I'm gonna get you! -(Precious neighs) 2703 01:37:24,448 --> 01:37:26,075 TIM: So, even though you're only a kid once... 2704 01:37:26,117 --> 01:37:27,910 well, unless you get to be a kid twice, 2705 01:37:27,952 --> 01:37:30,162 which is really weird, to be honest, 2706 01:37:30,204 --> 01:37:33,165 but the point is you have to grow up sometime. 2707 01:37:33,207 --> 01:37:35,418 -(Wizzie laughing) -(camera clicks) 2708 01:37:35,459 --> 01:37:38,170 And you should always be nice to your brother. 2709 01:37:38,212 --> 01:37:40,256 TINA: Ah, that was really sweet, Daddy. 2710 01:37:40,297 --> 01:37:42,133 That'll be great for my report. 2711 01:37:42,174 --> 01:37:44,343 TIM: Okay, so... so that's it, then. 2712 01:37:44,385 --> 01:37:47,096 TINA: Well, actually, there's one more little thing. 2713 01:37:48,723 --> 01:37:50,975 * * 2714 01:37:59,900 --> 01:38:01,485 (door opens) 2715 01:38:02,611 --> 01:38:04,655 Mama? Papa? 2716 01:38:04,697 --> 01:38:05,990 DAD: Wha... 2717 01:38:06,032 --> 01:38:09,118 -(gasps) Oh, my son. -(mom gasping) 2718 01:38:09,160 --> 01:38:11,579 -(dad sobbing) -(mom laughing) 2719 01:38:11,620 --> 01:38:13,706 MOM: You came home. 2720 01:38:13,748 --> 01:38:15,750 TIM: Oh, yeah. Right. 2721 01:38:15,791 --> 01:38:17,585 TINA: Okay, Pops. Now. 2722 01:38:17,626 --> 01:38:19,879 TIM: The end. 2723 01:38:19,920 --> 01:38:23,132 ("Together We Stand" playing) 2724 01:38:31,932 --> 01:38:34,185 (children's chorus vocalizing) 2725 01:39:04,006 --> 01:39:06,217 * * 2726 01:39:15,684 --> 01:39:18,479 TABITHA: * Catch my eye * 2727 01:39:18,521 --> 01:39:21,273 * Take my hand * 2728 01:39:21,315 --> 01:39:26,654 * This bond is tighter than we ever planned * 2729 01:39:26,696 --> 01:39:29,073 * Give me courage * 2730 01:39:29,115 --> 01:39:31,450 * So I can land * 2731 01:39:31,492 --> 01:39:35,037 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2732 01:39:35,079 --> 01:39:39,125 * So together we stand * 2733 01:39:40,209 --> 01:39:42,795 * Climb with me * 2734 01:39:42,837 --> 01:39:45,840 * Share my dreams * 2735 01:39:45,881 --> 01:39:47,633 * Tomorrow's brighter * 2736 01:39:47,675 --> 01:39:50,928 * Than it's ever been * 2737 01:39:50,970 --> 01:39:53,681 * Fear no danger * 2738 01:39:53,723 --> 01:39:56,058 * Make big plans * 2739 01:39:56,100 --> 01:39:59,729 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2740 01:39:59,770 --> 01:40:04,650 * So together we stand * 2741 01:40:04,692 --> 01:40:07,820 * Laugh and cry with me * 2742 01:40:07,862 --> 01:40:10,072 * Fly that high with me * 2743 01:40:10,114 --> 01:40:13,034 * See the sunset and the sunrise * 2744 01:40:13,075 --> 01:40:15,745 * The world looks so good through our eyes * 2745 01:40:15,786 --> 01:40:17,621 * Like the moon * 2746 01:40:17,663 --> 01:40:19,832 * And stars at night * 2747 01:40:21,083 --> 01:40:23,836 * Rest your head * 2748 01:40:23,878 --> 01:40:26,547 * Tell me your thoughts * 2749 01:40:26,589 --> 01:40:29,800 * Everything I have and call mine * 2750 01:40:29,842 --> 01:40:31,969 * Is all yours * 2751 01:40:32,011 --> 01:40:34,764 * Sail that ocean * 2752 01:40:34,805 --> 01:40:37,224 * Find that sand * 2753 01:40:37,266 --> 01:40:40,728 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2754 01:40:40,770 --> 01:40:45,066 * So together we stand * 2755 01:40:45,107 --> 01:40:47,360 (children's chorus vocalizing) 2756 01:41:04,752 --> 01:41:07,296 * Reach with me * 2757 01:41:07,338 --> 01:41:10,383 * See the sky * 2758 01:41:10,424 --> 01:41:15,596 * I'll always be here for the rest of your life * 2759 01:41:15,638 --> 01:41:18,307 * Side by side * 2760 01:41:18,349 --> 01:41:20,935 * Hand in hand * 2761 01:41:20,976 --> 01:41:26,691 * We speak a language no one else can understand * 2762 01:41:26,732 --> 01:41:29,193 * Hear those cheers * 2763 01:41:29,235 --> 01:41:31,654 * Strike up the band * 2764 01:41:31,696 --> 01:41:35,074 * We know that divided we'll fall * 2765 01:41:35,116 --> 01:41:40,621 * So together we stand * 2766 01:41:42,331 --> 01:41:44,166 * We know that * 2767 01:41:44,208 --> 01:41:46,794 * Divided we'll fall * 2768 01:41:46,836 --> 01:41:54,009 * So together we stand. * 2769 01:41:54,051 --> 01:41:56,846 (song ends) 2770 01:41:56,887 --> 01:41:59,181 * * 2771 01:42:16,365 --> 01:42:18,659 (chorus vocalizing) 2772 01:42:28,919 --> 01:42:31,213 * * 2773 01:43:00,951 --> 01:43:03,245 * * 2774 01:43:32,983 --> 01:43:35,277 * * 2775 01:44:05,015 --> 01:44:07,309 * * 2776 01:44:37,048 --> 01:44:39,341 * * 2777 01:45:09,080 --> 01:45:11,374 * * 2778 01:45:41,112 --> 01:45:43,406 * * 2779 01:46:13,144 --> 01:46:15,438 * * 2780 01:46:45,176 --> 01:46:47,470 * * 2781 01:47:10,993 --> 01:47:12,995 (music fades)