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♪ theme song playing ♪

2
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‐ ♪ It's time for Animaniacs! ♪

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♪ And we're zany to the max ♪

4
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♪ So just sit back and relax ♪

5
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♪ You'll laugh till you collapse ♪

6
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♪ We're Animaniacs! ♪

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‐ ♪ Come join the Warner Brothers ♪
‐ ♪ And the Warner Sister Dot ♪

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♪ Just for fun, we run around
the Warner movie lot ♪

9
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:37,329
♪ They lock us in the tower
whenever we get caught ♪

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♪ But we break loose and then vamoose
and now you know the plot ♪

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♪ We're Animaniacs ♪

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♪ Dot has wit and Yakko yaks ♪

13
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♪ Wakko packs away the snacks ♪

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♪ Our careers have made comebacks ♪

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♪ We're Animaniacs! ♪

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♪ Meet Pinky and the Brain
who want to rule the universe ♪

17
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♪ A brand new cast who tested well
in focus group research ♪

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♪ Gender balanced, pronoun neutral ♪

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♪ And ethnically diverse ♪

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♪ The trolls will say we're so passé,
but we did meta first ♪

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♪ We're Animaniacs ♪

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♪ You should see our new contracts ♪

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♪ We're zany to the max,
there's baloney in our slacks ♪

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♪ We're animan‐ey, totally insane‐y ♪

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‐ ♪ Inertial reference frame‐y ♪

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‐ ♪ Animaniacs! Those are the facts ♪

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♪

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♪

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‐ As the CEO of Warner Brothers,

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I've been told by my executive coach

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that I need to listen more,

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even though listening is very boring

33
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and my least favorite of all the senses.

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So, let me know how I can improve

35
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life on the lot.

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[sarcastically]:
I'd love to hear from all of you.

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DIRECTOR [whispering]:
Okay, that was great, but could we just...

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‐ Well then, how was
I supposed to say that line!?

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[angry growl]
[fighting]

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DIRECTOR: Nora, no! Oh!
YAKKO: What are you two doing?

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‐ The CEO created
an online suggestion box!

42
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‐ Okay. I want beef chili
in the water fountains,

43
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a "Young Wakko" spin‐off
starring me as my own dad,

44
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and every other Friday,
we shouldn't have to wear pants.

45
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‐ You already don't wear pants.

46
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‐ Oh...

47
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Fine then! I want some pants
to take off every other Friday!

48
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[click, beep]

49
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[beep]

50
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‐ Ugh. That's annoying.

51
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What's the point of doing anything on
the internet if you can't be anonymous?

52
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‐ Yeah! I'm not gonna put in my email.
‐ Then don't.

53
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[beep]

54
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‐ Hey! Make like a cobbler and shoo!

55
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[growling]
‐ Eh, forget it, Dot.

56
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We should probably get off
the computer anyway.

57
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♪

58
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‐ What the H‐E‐pair of chopsticks!?

59
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FEMALE POP‐UP VOICE:
Hello. Please sign up.

60
00:02:58,053 --> 00:02:59,680
‐ Never! [grunts]

61
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POP‐UP:
Hello. Please sign up.

62
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[screaming]

63
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Signing up is fun and free.

64
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[Warners screaming]

65
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[panting]

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‐ Okay. I think the coast is‐‐

67
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POP‐UP: Please sign up.

68
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[motorized shredding]

69
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ALL:
Phew!

70
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[beeping]

71
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Sign up to make

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00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,711
the world a better place.
[screaming]

73
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♪

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♪ dramatic sting ♪

75
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[rumbling]

76
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[gulps]

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[screaming]

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[sighing]

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[smash]
[all gasp]

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[beep]
Hello.

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[screaming]

82
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Let's get started.
[thud]

83
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It will only take a few seconds.
[smashing]

84
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‐ We said...

85
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not... now!

86
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[grunts]

87
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[beep]

88
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[engine revving]

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[tires screeching]

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‐ Please... sign up.

91
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Please sign up...

92
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[beeping]

93
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♪

94
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[shoveling]

95
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DOT/WAKKO: Phew!
‐ Okay, uh,

96
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does anybody wanna say a few words?

97
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‐ Sure. Ahem.

98
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Mustard. Umbrella.

99
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Borborygmus.

100
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[stomach growl]

101
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‐ That was beautiful, Wakko.

102
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‐ Well, what should we do‐‐

103
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Ah!

104
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POP‐UP: Sign up to continue.
[thunder crashes]

105
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‐ No! [sobs]

106
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‐ I think we should just submit!

107
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‐ [sighs] Maybe you're right.

108
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♪

109
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[beep]

110
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[typing]

111
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‐ Why'd you pick YakkoWarner2?

112
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‐ YakkoWarner was taken.

113
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‐ By me!
[Yakko growls]

114
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[beep]

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POP‐UP:
Thank you. Please note. By submitting...

116
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[faster]:
you, the undersigned, forfeit all rights,

117
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privileges, and licenses
herein and herein contained,

118
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et cetera, et cetera,
sanctus sanctus dominus, e pluribus unum,

119
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ipso facto, veni vidi vici, et tu brute.

120
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[zap]

121
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♪

122
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‐ Finally! Peace at last!

123
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[laughter]

124
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[thunder, wind blowing]

125
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♪

126
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‐ Oh no! We're getting spammed!

127
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DOT/WAKKO:
Ah!

128
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MALE POP‐UP VOICE: We've made
some changes to our privacy policy

129
00:05:42,718 --> 00:05:45,470
by eliminating the privacy
part of the policy.

130
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[Warners screaming]

131
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FEMALE POP‐UP VOICE:
Get 80% off our least desirable items.

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‐ Ooh! I can't say no to 80% off.

133
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What if they have
hot looks at cool prices?

134
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BOTH:
No! Don't open it!

135
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[chimes]

136
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[gasp, groaning]

137
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‐ They got Wakko!
[beeping]

138
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♪

139
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[crackling]

140
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‐ [robotic]: Greetings, Dot Warner.

141
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I can't believe the deal I got
on these name brand sunglasses.

142
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Clic‐click here.

143
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‐ He's been hacked!

144
00:06:14,750 --> 00:06:15,626
♪

145
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♪

146
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♪

147
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‐ [robotic]: Greetings, Yakko Warner.

148
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I‐I‐I can't believe the deal I got

149
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on these na‐name brand sunglasses.

150
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Click here.

151
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[screaming]

152
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‐ Get thee behind me, scammers!

153
00:06:32,768 --> 00:06:35,771
The power of two‐factor
authentication compels you!

154
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[grunting]

155
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‐ [robotic]:
Greetings, Dot Warner.

156
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[beeping]

157
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♪

158
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[thunder crashes]

159
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‐ It's... not... working!

160
00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:48,534
‐ We've gotta reformat him!

161
00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:49,034
[grunts]

162
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♪

163
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[straining]

164
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,669
[beeping]

165
00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:00,462
Log out of all active sessions!

166
00:07:01,964 --> 00:07:03,715
BOTH:
Reset password with at least

167
00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:06,844
one number, capital letter,
and special character!

168
00:07:08,554 --> 00:07:10,013
‐ [robotic]: I have successfully...

169
00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:12,015
[normal]:
changed all my passwords.

170
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[sighs] What happened?

171
00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:21,441
Did I get the cool looks at hot prices?

172
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POP‐UP:
We are so sad to see you go.

173
00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:27,364
What if we only get in touch, like,

174
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three times a day? Is that okay?

175
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♪

176
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[Dot and Yakko screaming]

177
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[all screaming]

178
00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:36,957
[buzzing]

179
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,293
ALL:
Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe!

180
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,963
♪

181
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,048
[buzzing]

182
00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:46,925
[screaming]

183
00:07:47,551 --> 00:07:48,886
[screaming]

184
00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:53,223
[all screaming]

185
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:56,560
[all panting]

186
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:01,440
DOT/YAKKO: Phew.
[Wakko grunts]

187
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,151
[screaming]

188
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,736
[straining]

189
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‐ Wa‐‐
[shredding]

190
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:09,865
♪

191
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,366
[screaming, yelling]

192
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:14,578
♪ dramatic sting ♪

193
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,914
[grunts]
[engine revving]

194
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:23,253
[screaming]

195
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:25,464
[crash, explosion]

196
00:08:25,464 --> 00:08:28,258
[gasping]
[wind blowing]

197
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:30,052
[yell, grunting]

198
00:08:30,052 --> 00:08:31,595
♪ dramatic sting ♪

199
00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:33,180
[thunder crashes]

200
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,057
‐ No!

201
00:08:35,641 --> 00:08:36,600
[screams]

202
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♪

203
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:44,024
‐ In all seriousness, folks,

204
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,485
the internet can be a treacherous place.

205
00:08:46,485 --> 00:08:49,112
Be careful not to submit
your personal information

206
00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:50,822
to third parties.

207
00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:53,075
‐ Thank you, Wakko. In fact,

208
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:55,536
there is only one website you can trust.

209
00:08:55,536 --> 00:09:01,416
www.dotwarnermalwarevirusspreader
indentitythefttrojanhorsebotcom.edy

210
00:09:01,792 --> 00:09:05,295
‐ Order now, and use
the promo code "suckers"

211
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:07,923
to add 50% onto your purchase!

212
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,011
[thunder]

213
00:09:13,011 --> 00:09:15,764
♪ Pinky & the Brain theme playing ♪

214
00:09:16,849 --> 00:09:18,517
‐ Gee, Brain,
what do you wanna do tonight?

215
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:22,145
‐ The same thing we do every night, Pinky.

216
00:09:22,145 --> 00:09:25,607
Try to take over the world!
[thunder crashes]

217
00:09:25,607 --> 00:09:27,734
♪

218
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,695
‐ ♪ They're Pinky and the Brain ♪

219
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:31,905
♪ Yes, Pinky and the Brain ♪

220
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,782
♪ One is a genius ♪

221
00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:35,701
♪ The other's insane ♪

222
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,744
♪ They're laboratory mice ♪

223
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,705
♪ Their genes have been spliced ♪

224
00:09:39,705 --> 00:09:42,416
♪ They're dinky,
they're Pinky and the Brain ♪

225
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:44,418
♪ Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain ♪

226
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:53,468
♪

227
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,973
‐ Expecting to see your two favorite mice

228
00:09:57,973 --> 00:10:01,518
being dumb and smart
or whatever it is that they do?

229
00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:05,063
Unfortunately,
nobody's seen them in months.

230
00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:08,859
So, to fill the slot,
I turned otherwise useless footage

231
00:10:08,859 --> 00:10:12,196
into a nostalgic streaming experience!

232
00:10:12,196 --> 00:10:14,781
You see, Pinky and the Brain wasn't always

233
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,783
the show we know and love today.

234
00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:19,661
In fact, the studio
struggled to find a vehicle

235
00:10:19,661 --> 00:10:22,331
for the dynamic duo for a long,

236
00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:24,249
long time.

237
00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,043
What you're about to see

238
00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:29,296
are the original pilots
for Pinky and the Brain.

239
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:31,965
They've never been seen by anyone before.

240
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,967
Except the archival editor

241
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,470
who shaves his face
over the water fountain.

242
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:40,474
So, open wide, baby birdies.

243
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:43,477
Mommy's about to regurgitate some slop

244
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:46,605
into your content‐hungry mouths.

245
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:47,856
[retching]

246
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,149
[bars and tone]

247
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,944
♪ '50s‐style music ♪

248
00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:54,696
ANNOUNCER:
The Pink and The Brain Show!

249
00:10:54,696 --> 00:10:56,782
Starring Pinky!

250
00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,327
And The Brain!

251
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:02,287
[canned laughter]

252
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,623
[grumble]
[slam]

253
00:11:04,623 --> 00:11:06,917
‐ [sighs] Pinky! I'm home!

254
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,586
I snuck out of work early
because Old Man Jenkins

255
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:12,881
is taking the senior partners
out for a celebratory dinner.

256
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,259
But of course, I didn't get the invite.

257
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,636
[sniffing]

258
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:21,098
Pinky, what is that putrid smell!?

259
00:11:21,098 --> 00:11:22,891
[splatter]
‐ That's din‐‐

260
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:25,644
[applause]

261
00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:27,145
That's dinner, Brain.

262
00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:29,815
I made potatoes all rotten!

263
00:11:29,815 --> 00:11:31,149
[canned laughter]
[groans]

264
00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:32,860
‐ It's potatoes au gratin,

265
00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,153
you domestic doddypoll.

266
00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:37,281
One of these days, I'm gonna

267
00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:40,033
transfer the kinetic energy of my fist

268
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:43,161
into a force vector applied
directly to your oral aperture!

269
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:46,748
‐ Ooh! I've never been to Connecticut.
Sounds cozy.

270
00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:49,960
[screaming studio laughter]

271
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,545
[laughter quiets down]

272
00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:53,297
Hey, Brain!

273
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:55,716
Why don't we go celebrate
me ruining dinner

274
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:58,802
by going to eat dinner at
a fancy dinner restaurant?

275
00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:00,721
‐ Ah, yes.

276
00:12:00,721 --> 00:12:02,556
And let me guess.

277
00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:04,224
Whatever restaurant we choose

278
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,852
will be the exact establishment my boss

279
00:12:06,852 --> 00:12:08,687
[Director screams]
and the senior partners are dining at

280
00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:09,980
this evening, correct?

281
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:11,690
This, despite the fact that we live in

282
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:14,318
a sprawling metropolis,
where the possibility

283
00:12:14,318 --> 00:12:17,571
of picking the same
restaurant is almost nil.

284
00:12:18,572 --> 00:12:20,866
‐ Ahem. Spoiler alert.

285
00:12:20,866 --> 00:12:22,826
[studio laughter]

286
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:24,328
‐ Warner Brothers...

287
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:28,332
[laughter continues]

288
00:12:28,332 --> 00:12:30,459
[fire alarm ringing]

289
00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:34,087
‐ Well, that's the last time
I make those potatoes!

290
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,340
♪

291
00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:40,177
‐ Test audiences found Brain's character

292
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:43,180
patriarchal, cruel, and sadistic.

293
00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,473
Yah!
[glass shatters]

294
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:47,351
Despite having everything a 1950s audience

295
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:49,478
was looking for in a TV husband,

296
00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:52,022
the show failed due
to creative differences.

297
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:55,275
But they gave him
another shot a few years later.

298
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,360
[bars and tone]

299
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:57,736
♪ Brady Bunch‐style music ♪

300
00:12:57,736 --> 00:13:01,156
‐ ♪ Here's a ditty 'bout
a mouse named Pinky ♪

301
00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:05,911
♪ Who had three little
Pinkies of her own ♪
[laughing]

302
00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:09,164
♪ They all had fur that's
white like their mama ♪

303
00:13:09,164 --> 00:13:11,959
♪ The baby wore a cone ♪

304
00:13:12,668 --> 00:13:15,963
♪ Here's a refrain 'bout
a mouse named Brain ♪
[Brain yelps]

305
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:20,259
♪ He had three little
Brain boys by his side... ♪

306
00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:21,468
‐ No!

307
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,554
This is a flawed premise.

308
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:26,598
Nobody with three children
would willingly sign up

309
00:13:26,598 --> 00:13:28,392
for three more.

310
00:13:28,392 --> 00:13:30,352
Who wrote this improbable drivel?

311
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:34,106
‐ Um, it was based on my life.

312
00:13:35,023 --> 00:13:38,402
‐ Well, I suggest you
write yourself a new one.

313
00:13:39,570 --> 00:13:42,948
That's what I think of you,
Warner Brothers!

314
00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:45,826
[laughter]
[crash]

315
00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:47,494
♪

316
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:50,289
‐ Now, who's going to
teach me how to drive?

317
00:13:50,289 --> 00:13:52,416
‐ It's always about you!

318
00:13:52,416 --> 00:13:54,334
Pinky, Pinky, Pinky!

319
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:57,713
‐ Eh, I can't say this
one was all on Brain.

320
00:13:57,713 --> 00:13:59,548
It was 1969.

321
00:13:59,548 --> 00:14:02,092
Everyone was making bad decisions.

322
00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,678
For instance, my sister Theodora

323
00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:07,514
was born that year. [growls]

324
00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:11,268
This next pilot took all the attention
away from Mommy and Daddy

325
00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:14,438
and lasted as long
as Theodora's first marriage.

326
00:14:14,438 --> 00:14:15,522
Enjoy.

327
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:16,523
[bars and tone]

328
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,942
[Warners laughing]

329
00:14:18,942 --> 00:14:20,194
[panting]

330
00:14:20,194 --> 00:14:23,238
♪ Cheers‐style music ♪

331
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:26,074
‐ ♪ Getting through
to the end of the day ♪

332
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:28,869
♪ Sure is pretty hard ♪

333
00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:31,205
♪ Stepping back would surely shed ♪

334
00:14:31,205 --> 00:14:34,041
♪ Some light on where you are ♪

335
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:38,337
♪ How would you like to take a break? ♪

336
00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:43,967
♪ Don't you wanna be ♪

337
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:46,929
♪ Where the coffee's always hot? ♪

338
00:14:49,223 --> 00:14:52,601
♪ And you know they'll brew another pot ♪

339
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,272
♪ Life is tough, and you are sad ♪

340
00:14:57,272 --> 00:15:00,234
♪ So go and drink until you're glad ♪

341
00:15:00,234 --> 00:15:03,028
♪ The coffee's black, and it is hot ♪

342
00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:05,864
♪ Forget about everything you're not ♪

343
00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:08,450
♪ Just go somewhere
and avoid your problems ♪

344
00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:11,036
♪ Instead of facing them ♪

345
00:15:11,036 --> 00:15:13,914
♪ Yeah, coffee ♪

346
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:16,917
♪

347
00:15:19,753 --> 00:15:21,255
♪ theme ends ♪

348
00:15:21,255 --> 00:15:25,050
PINKY: Narfs is filmed in front of
a live studio audience. Narfs!

349
00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:27,219
[audience applause, cheering]

350
00:15:27,219 --> 00:15:29,596
[grunts]
[thunder crashes]

351
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,432
‐ Afternoon, Pinky.
ALL: Brain!

352
00:15:32,891 --> 00:15:35,143
‐ How does everyone in here know my name?

353
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:37,771
‐ This is a place where
everybody knows your name.

354
00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:39,398
Didn't you listen to the theme song?

355
00:15:39,398 --> 00:15:42,317
‐ It didn't mention that
in the theme song.

356
00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,987
[coffee maker whistling]
‐ Oh. Maybe that's that other song

357
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:47,489
that's almost the same, but way better.

358
00:15:47,489 --> 00:15:51,410
‐ Regardless, it's quite a depressing
ditty for a comedy show, don't you think?

359
00:15:51,410 --> 00:15:54,121
Don't any of you have hopes or dreams?
[coffee maker whistling, rattling]

360
00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:57,875
‐ I hope I can get another coffee!

361
00:15:57,875 --> 00:16:00,836
[audience laughter]

362
00:16:00,836 --> 00:16:04,131
[laughing]
‐ [sighs] Forget it.

363
00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:05,799
[grunts]
[laughter continues]

364
00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:07,634
[whistling, rattling]
‐ [laughing] Ooh?

365
00:16:08,594 --> 00:16:10,596
BRAIN:
Warner Brothers!

366
00:16:10,596 --> 00:16:12,806
‐ It took Warner Brothers eight years

367
00:16:12,806 --> 00:16:15,309
to calm Brain down. [grunts]

368
00:16:16,101 --> 00:16:18,979
And when that didn't work,
they threatened to make him

369
00:16:18,979 --> 00:16:21,440
the "next Urkel."

370
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:23,775
And with that, he was back the same day

371
00:16:23,775 --> 00:16:26,028
to shoot this next pilot.

372
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,029
[bars and tone]

373
00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:29,990
♪ Fresh Prince of Bel Air‐style music ♪

374
00:16:35,245 --> 00:16:38,749
‐ ♪ So, this is a tale,
I'm telling you how ♪

375
00:16:38,749 --> 00:16:40,834
♪ A mouse's life got all messed around ♪

376
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:43,253
♪ And I'd rather take no time
and tell you point blank ♪

377
00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:46,048
♪ About how I became
the Fresh Pinky of Burbank ♪

378
00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:50,802
♪ Narf! Narf Narf! Narf! Poit! ♪

379
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:53,889
♪

380
00:16:53,889 --> 00:16:55,265
[grunts]

381
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:57,518
[audience cheering]

382
00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:01,563
‐ Pinky! You were supposed
to be back over an hour ago!

383
00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:04,399
‐ My bad, Brain.
I guess I'm not used to the rules

384
00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:06,902
because I'm from
the wrong side of the tracks.

385
00:17:07,903 --> 00:17:11,823
‐ Well, be that as it may,
you're going to have a lot

386
00:17:11,823 --> 00:17:14,785
of explaining to do
when Mom and Dad get home.

387
00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:17,496
‐ Why would I have to explain
that I was late? [grunts]

388
00:17:17,496 --> 00:17:19,998
They'll never know, unless you tell 'em.

389
00:17:19,998 --> 00:17:22,000
AUDIENCE:
Ooh...

390
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,962
‐ Are you suggesting that I lie

391
00:17:24,962 --> 00:17:26,797
to my mother and father?

392
00:17:27,256 --> 00:17:30,676
‐ All I'm saying is what they
don't know can't hurt them.

393
00:17:30,676 --> 00:17:32,594
[audience cheering]

394
00:17:32,594 --> 00:17:36,473
‐ Wow, Pinky.
I suppose despite my academic prowess,

395
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:39,017
I still can learn quite a bit from you.

396
00:17:39,017 --> 00:17:41,603
‐ You're darn right, Brain.
You've got the book smarts,

397
00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:43,856
but I've got the street smarts.

398
00:17:43,856 --> 00:17:46,775
‐ I've got street smarts, too! Heck,

399
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:50,112
I've even got street moves! Check it out!

400
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:53,615
[audience cheering]
♪ hip hop music playing ♪

401
00:17:53,615 --> 00:17:56,159
[cheering continues]

402
00:17:56,159 --> 00:17:59,746
They love me. They really, really love me!

403
00:18:00,205 --> 00:18:02,624
♪

404
00:18:02,624 --> 00:18:06,336
‐ Huzzah! What is the word, my good man?

405
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:09,464
[laughs]
[crowd cheering]

406
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:10,799
[laughing]

407
00:18:10,799 --> 00:18:12,134
[Egwind grunts]

408
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:15,220
[crickets chirping]

409
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:17,681
[crowd cheering]
[grunts]

410
00:18:17,681 --> 00:18:20,475
[audience gasps]
‐ You philistines.

411
00:18:20,475 --> 00:18:22,603
I've debased myself in front of you

412
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:24,521
with my circus chicanery,

413
00:18:24,521 --> 00:18:29,484
and yet, you worship at the feet of
this sunglassed buffoon!

414
00:18:29,484 --> 00:18:33,030
AUDIENCE MEMBER: Woo!
‐ Well, I will be your Pagliacci no more!

415
00:18:33,030 --> 00:18:34,072
[Egwind gasps]

416
00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:36,200
‐ Fare thee well!

417
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,326
[crash]

418
00:18:37,326 --> 00:18:39,703
‐ Good riddance, you third rate,

419
00:18:39,703 --> 00:18:41,955
third wheel ham actor!

420
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,624
[eagle screeches]
[Egwind screams]

421
00:18:43,624 --> 00:18:45,334
♪

422
00:18:46,668 --> 00:18:50,422
I am finished doing
terrible sitcom pilots!

423
00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:52,257
There's more to life than being told

424
00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:54,593
what to say and do all the time, Pinky!

425
00:18:54,593 --> 00:18:57,179
Now, come with me!
‐ Righto!

426
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:59,473
‐ We must prepare for tomorrow night.

427
00:18:59,473 --> 00:19:01,683
‐ Why, Brain? What are
we gonna do tomorrow night?

428
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:04,811
‐ Try to take over the world!

429
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:07,606
‐ And with that iconic proclamation,

430
00:19:07,606 --> 00:19:12,319
the highly successful
Pinky and the Brain franchise was born.

431
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:14,696
And now, it's dead

432
00:19:14,696 --> 00:19:16,532
because they're missing.

433
00:19:16,532 --> 00:19:18,200
[phone rings]

434
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,826
What is it!?

435
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:22,287
Oh! You found them!

436
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:25,707
Wonderful. Get them back on set!

437
00:19:25,707 --> 00:19:28,126
[grunts]
‐ How adorable.

438
00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:31,713
She thinks she's punishing us,
when she's actually punishing

439
00:19:31,713 --> 00:19:34,049
our clones.
‐ Clones?

440
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:35,217
‐ That's right.

441
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:39,179
♪

442
00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,722
[alarm blares]

443
00:19:44,768 --> 00:19:48,689
After receiving the latest script
of our "adventures,"

444
00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:50,607
I reached my breaking point.

445
00:19:50,607 --> 00:19:53,777
I will no longer do the bidding
of my television overlords.

446
00:19:54,695 --> 00:19:55,654
Instead,

447
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:58,532
I have created clones
who will do my bidding,

448
00:19:58,532 --> 00:20:01,785
leaving us free to truly
pursue world domination.

449
00:20:02,744 --> 00:20:06,540
‐ So, you mean to tell me
the Pinky and the Brain show

450
00:20:06,540 --> 00:20:08,125
isn't going to be us anymore?

451
00:20:08,125 --> 00:20:11,128
‐ Precisely. No one will be the wiser

452
00:20:11,128 --> 00:20:13,672
as these clones are indistinguishable

453
00:20:13,672 --> 00:20:15,465
from us in every facet!

454
00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:18,468
‐ [Brain's voice]: Gee, Brain.
What do you wanna do tonight?

455
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:19,970
‐ [Pinky's voice]: Pancakes!

456
00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:22,890
‐ Narf... [inhales deeply]

457
00:20:22,890 --> 00:20:25,642
‐ Egad! It's like looking in the mirror!

458
00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:26,935
[sighs]

459
00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,563
‐ Cloning is an art, not a science.

460
00:20:29,563 --> 00:20:33,192
And alas, I am merely
the world's foremost scientific mind.

461
00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:37,321
Come, Pinky.
We must prepare for tomorrow night.

462
00:20:37,321 --> 00:20:39,740
‐ Why, Brain?
What are we gonna do tomorrow night?

463
00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:42,492
[gasps] Ooh, please let it be pancakes!

464
00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:43,744
[machine hissing]

465
00:20:43,744 --> 00:20:46,455
‐ The same thing we do every night, Pinky.

466
00:20:46,455 --> 00:20:48,415
Try to take over the world!

467
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:50,417
[hissing, rattling]

468
00:20:51,502 --> 00:20:53,629
♪

469
00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,009
[VCR clicking, whirring]

470
00:20:59,009 --> 00:21:01,887
♪ distorted music ♪

471
00:21:01,887 --> 00:21:04,890
♪ retro upbeat music ♪

472
00:21:07,351 --> 00:21:10,395
‐ Hey, gang!
It's time for Everyday Safety!

473
00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:12,105
‐ That's right! We're here to give you

474
00:21:12,105 --> 00:21:15,192
everyday safety tips for
the most common emergencies.

475
00:21:15,192 --> 00:21:16,818
‐ Tonight, what to do in the event of

476
00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:20,239
a giant, exploding syrup factory
at the top of a very tall hill

477
00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:21,532
overlooking your city.

478
00:21:21,532 --> 00:21:23,534
♪

479
00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:27,538
Think fast! Don't panic!

480
00:21:27,538 --> 00:21:30,499
A million gallons of piping hot syrup
are racing toward you!

481
00:21:30,499 --> 00:21:32,584
First,
grab your emergency supplies.

482
00:21:32,584 --> 00:21:35,546
They should be in your
Exploding Syrup Factory Emergency Bag.

483
00:21:35,546 --> 00:21:38,048
‐ It should contain an inflatable raft,

484
00:21:38,048 --> 00:21:39,925
a metric ton of ice,

485
00:21:39,925 --> 00:21:41,677
an ant farm with three active queens,

486
00:21:41,677 --> 00:21:43,637
some pancake mix, a bat,

487
00:21:43,637 --> 00:21:45,097
and a radio.

488
00:21:49,434 --> 00:21:51,854
‐ Inflate the raft and throw it
at the syrup wave

489
00:21:51,854 --> 00:21:53,939
to buy yourself some time.
[grunts]

490
00:21:57,442 --> 00:21:59,486
YAKKO:
Now, carve the metric ton of ice

491
00:21:59,486 --> 00:22:02,239
into an authentic igloo
and take shelter inside.

492
00:22:02,239 --> 00:22:05,117
‐ Better get carving!
That syrup's coming in hot!

493
00:22:05,117 --> 00:22:06,577
♪

494
00:22:06,577 --> 00:22:08,579
[grinding]
‐ It's finished!

495
00:22:09,538 --> 00:22:10,539
[door slams]

496
00:22:14,543 --> 00:22:16,044
♪ relaxed music ♪

497
00:22:17,129 --> 00:22:18,547
[rattling]

498
00:22:20,007 --> 00:22:23,510
‐ Oh no! My hands are sticky,
and I don't have a napkin

499
00:22:23,510 --> 00:22:25,596
because it's an emergency.

500
00:22:25,596 --> 00:22:27,890
‐ Don't worry.
That's what the ants are for.

501
00:22:27,890 --> 00:22:28,974
♪

502
00:22:30,601 --> 00:22:32,352
[ants chirping]

503
00:22:32,352 --> 00:22:33,353
[gasps]

504
00:22:33,353 --> 00:22:34,479
‐ What's the radio for?

505
00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:36,773
‐ Once the syrup cools,
we'll be trapped in here

506
00:22:36,773 --> 00:22:39,443
for millions of years
like mosquitoes in amber,

507
00:22:39,443 --> 00:22:41,236
so we'll need some entertainment.

508
00:22:42,446 --> 00:22:45,949
NPR DJ:
You're listening to hour 97

509
00:22:45,949 --> 00:22:48,952
of "The Art and Craft of Storytelling,"

510
00:22:48,952 --> 00:22:50,495
with Irv Gold.

511
00:22:50,495 --> 00:22:52,998
IRV GOLD:
I often ask myself, what is storytell‐‐

512
00:22:52,998 --> 00:22:54,166
[Dot grunts]
[fizzling]

513
00:22:54,166 --> 00:22:56,502
‐ And that is what the bat's for.

514
00:22:56,502 --> 00:22:58,253
This has been Everyday Safety.

515
00:22:58,253 --> 00:23:00,255
Tune in next time
when we share tips

516
00:23:00,255 --> 00:23:02,466
for when you're with your grandmother
visiting a home

517
00:23:02,466 --> 00:23:05,302
for rehabilitated rattlesnakes,
and there's a power failure

518
00:23:05,302 --> 00:23:07,679
that opens the doors to
the rattlesnake enclosure,

519
00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,765
but also your pockets
are filled with maracas,

520
00:23:09,765 --> 00:23:11,892
so you can't tell where
the sounds are coming from.

521
00:23:11,892 --> 00:23:13,352
[hissing, rattling]

522
00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:15,354
‐ Who wants the first Flatty Patty?

523
00:23:15,354 --> 00:23:18,190
‐ Mm! Oh no! We forgot the butter!

524
00:23:18,190 --> 00:23:19,733
Don't worry, I'll go get some.

525
00:23:19,733 --> 00:23:20,776
DOT/YAKKO:
No!

526
00:23:20,776 --> 00:23:22,277
[splattering]
[gasps]

527
00:23:22,277 --> 00:23:23,612
♪

528
00:23:23,612 --> 00:23:25,906
WAKKO [distorted]:
Oh, the viscosity!

529
00:23:26,573 --> 00:23:28,784
♪ retro upbeat music ♪

530
00:23:30,786 --> 00:23:33,789
♪