1
00:00:01,101 --> 00:00:02,936
♪ This must be my season ♪
2
00:00:02,936 --> 00:00:05,005
♪ These bands is cohesive ♪
3
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,307
To say this semester has
started off with a bang
4
00:00:07,307 --> 00:00:09,243
would be an understatement.
5
00:00:09,243 --> 00:00:11,278
When you go from
Zoey's little brother
6
00:00:11,278 --> 00:00:14,581
to Junior Johnson,
Five Star Gamma Man,
7
00:00:14,581 --> 00:00:16,216
life just hits different.
8
00:00:16,216 --> 00:00:19,019
♪ Looking laminated ♪
9
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:21,755
Wow. This is
the third time this week.
10
00:00:21,755 --> 00:00:23,056
How do they keep
getting in here?
11
00:00:23,056 --> 00:00:24,157
♪ Mm ♪
12
00:00:24,157 --> 00:00:25,459
♪ Get it, get it, get it, unh ♪
13
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:28,862
It's like no matter here I go,
all eyes are on me.
14
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:31,164
And to be real,
I ain't mad at it.
15
00:00:31,164 --> 00:00:32,499
♪ It's feeling like
the weekend ♪
16
00:00:32,499 --> 00:00:34,401
♪ Tuesday, but it's
feeling like the weekend ♪
17
00:00:34,401 --> 00:00:36,236
♪ Oh, God, I be
looking for a reason ♪
18
00:00:36,236 --> 00:00:38,472
Are y'all seeing this?
Wha--
19
00:00:38,472 --> 00:00:39,907
♪ Oh, my God, it's feeling
like the weekend ♪
20
00:00:39,907 --> 00:00:41,375
Okay.
21
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:42,976
♪ Tuesday, but it's
feeling like the weekend ♪
22
00:00:42,976 --> 00:00:44,545
But it isn't
just about sex.
23
00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:47,114
It's also about making
a woman feel special.
24
00:00:47,114 --> 00:00:48,982
You know,
being fully present.
25
00:00:48,982 --> 00:00:51,652
Earl is your middle brother,
right?
26
00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:53,854
He finally opened up that
ice cream shop in Vallejo.
27
00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:55,088
That's what's up.
28
00:00:55,088 --> 00:00:57,124
I can't believe you
remember that.
29
00:00:57,124 --> 00:01:00,360
You are such a good listener,
Junior.
30
00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,462
Well, you know, listening is
the essence of everything --
31
00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:03,597
[ French accent ]
Excuse me, sir?
32
00:01:03,597 --> 00:01:05,766
Uh, we're straight, garcon.
Merci.
33
00:01:05,766 --> 00:01:06,967
Not quite.
34
00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:08,802
Your card was declined.
35
00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:12,673
♪♪
36
00:01:12,673 --> 00:01:15,976
I hope the valet's prepared
for some bad news.
37
00:01:15,976 --> 00:01:17,511
♪♪
38
00:01:17,511 --> 00:01:21,114
♪ Watch out, world,
I'm grown now ♪
39
00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:22,950
♪ I'm grown ♪
40
00:01:22,950 --> 00:01:25,218
♪ Learn something new
every day ♪
41
00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:28,021
♪ I don't know,
so I'mma feel my way ♪
42
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:30,424
♪ Got the weight of the world
on me ♪
43
00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:33,460
♪ But no regrets,
this is what I say ♪
44
00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:37,197
♪ Watch out, world,
I'm grown now ♪
45
00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:38,932
♪ I'm grown ♪
♪ You can tell me ♪
46
00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:44,171
♪ My heart beating so loud ♪
47
00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:47,874
♪ Mama, look, I'm grown now ♪
48
00:01:47,874 --> 00:01:49,509
♪ I'm grown ♪
49
00:01:52,245 --> 00:01:54,681
♪ I'm in two time zones,
finding money where I'm at ♪
50
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:57,384
♪ I got new pink stones,
find me shining from the back ♪
51
00:01:57,384 --> 00:01:59,820
♪ Gotta keep to my lone,
'less she wanna make it clap ♪
52
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:01,855
♪ If you ask for a loan,
well, I can't do that ♪
53
00:02:01,855 --> 00:02:03,190
♪ I need more ♪
54
00:02:03,190 --> 00:02:04,625
Late night, stud?
55
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,927
Yeah, my man was working on
his stroke game last night
56
00:02:06,927 --> 00:02:08,095
with Candice.
57
00:02:08,095 --> 00:02:10,263
She got that
hourglass ass, huh?
58
00:02:10,263 --> 00:02:12,165
How can an ass
be hourglass?
59
00:02:12,165 --> 00:02:15,102
Nah, my credit card
got declined,
60
00:02:15,102 --> 00:02:16,737
and I was so embarrassed,
61
00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:19,940
I had to Charlie Brown walk
all the way home.
62
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:22,576
Yikes, so you're officially
a broke-ass scrub.
63
00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:24,578
Ever since he turned her down,
you could
64
00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:27,180
cut the tension between them
with a hot butter knife.
65
00:02:27,180 --> 00:02:29,249
What year is it
where you grew up, again?
66
00:02:29,249 --> 00:02:30,951
Zaara: Don't be too hard
on yourself, Junior.
67
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:32,352
These things happen.
68
00:02:32,352 --> 00:02:34,988
I mean, not to me, 'cause I am
financially responsible.
69
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:36,056
Oh, here we go.
70
00:02:36,056 --> 00:02:38,358
Unlike some people...
like you.
71
00:02:38,358 --> 00:02:40,093
Don't your parents
pay for your stuff?
72
00:02:40,093 --> 00:02:41,395
I mean, you can't flex
73
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:42,996
when you're still suckling on
Mommy and Daddy's teat.
74
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,398
Okay, first, ew.
75
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:46,566
And second, Junior's parents
pay his way, too.
76
00:02:46,566 --> 00:02:47,501
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
77
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:49,569
They -- They pay for
my dorm and my tuition.
78
00:02:49,569 --> 00:02:51,571
Everything else,
I've saved up from working.
79
00:02:51,571 --> 00:02:53,340
All I'm saying is
things are a lot harder
80
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,275
when you have to go to school
and work on the side.
81
00:02:55,275 --> 00:02:56,410
Yeah, I mean,
that is true.
82
00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:57,577
I'm blessed to be
on a scholarship,
83
00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:59,780
but football is pretty much
a full-time job.
84
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:00,814
[ Scoffs ]
85
00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:02,015
You ever try
reading Nietzsche
86
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:04,051
and doing chest presses
at the same time?
87
00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:05,719
I-It's impossible.
88
00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:08,055
Sure,
blame the dumbbells.
89
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:10,691
Yeah, but even when
your parents do support you,
90
00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,225
it comes
with obligations,
91
00:03:12,225 --> 00:03:15,028
like having to abandon your
dreams of becoming a singer
92
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,263
just to go into something
more practical
93
00:03:16,263 --> 00:03:18,432
like
occupational therapy.
94
00:03:18,432 --> 00:03:19,700
What?
95
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,235
Was singing even my dream?
I can barely remember.
96
00:03:22,235 --> 00:03:24,471
I'm just so focused on
this one now, you know?
97
00:03:24,471 --> 00:03:26,840
Well, I still need to find a way
to bring in some extra bread.
98
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:28,875
With your broke ass.
99
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,343
How does she keep
doing that?
100
00:03:30,343 --> 00:03:31,812
You know what you could do?
101
00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:33,346
Jump on the stock market.
102
00:03:33,346 --> 00:03:34,981
You know, I've heard a lot of
people make money that way.
103
00:03:34,981 --> 00:03:37,417
Oh, yes,
the good ol' S&P,
104
00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:39,920
or NASDAQ,
if you're nasty.
105
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,254
Literally cringe.
106
00:03:41,254 --> 00:03:43,056
But here, look at this.
107
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,658
Welcome to
"The Stock Drop."
108
00:03:44,658 --> 00:03:47,194
Thanks to new apps like
Robinhood and Treasure Island,
109
00:03:47,194 --> 00:03:48,729
which have straight curbed
commission and fees,
110
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:51,064
trading has never been
more Gen Z accessible.
111
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:55,102
So you don't have to be a blue
blood to get some blue chip.
112
00:03:55,102 --> 00:03:57,871
In fact, forums like
WallStreetBets and TikTok
113
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:00,173
have now become communities
for a whole new brand
114
00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:02,676
of counterculture trading
and shady shorting.
115
00:04:02,676 --> 00:04:04,544
GameStop, anyone?
116
00:04:04,544 --> 00:04:07,247
But the main reason to invest,
my children, remains the same.
117
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,715
That money that you plop into
your bank account
118
00:04:08,715 --> 00:04:11,118
for safekeeping is
actually losing its value
119
00:04:11,118 --> 00:04:12,452
due to inflation.
120
00:04:12,452 --> 00:04:14,087
So if you aren't making
your money work for you
121
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:16,623
in the market,
what the hell are you doing?
122
00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:20,193
Okay, wow, it's a bit harsh,
but to the point.
123
00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:22,662
But I don't know. It still
sounds a little bit risky.
124
00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:25,532
Hmm. Well, you gotta risk it
if you want the biscuit, champ.
125
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:27,901
I know, but I am gonna explore
some different avenues.
126
00:04:27,901 --> 00:04:30,570
Okay, but if you start
an OnlyFans,
127
00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:32,773
I legally have to report it,
as your RA.
128
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:35,075
Bro, you're just a snitch.
129
00:04:35,075 --> 00:04:37,010
It's a job.
130
00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:40,981
Yo, uh, expiration dates
are just suggestions, right?
131
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:43,150
Yes, that is a scam to
get you to buy more.
132
00:04:43,150 --> 00:04:44,751
Okay, cool.
133
00:04:44,751 --> 00:04:46,186
[ Cellphone chimes ]
134
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,821
Check from Metaverse
just dropped.
135
00:04:47,821 --> 00:04:49,823
7,500 smackers, man.
136
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,024
What?
$7,500.
137
00:04:51,024 --> 00:04:52,192
Do you think
it's a mistake?
138
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:54,427
No, bro,
those speakers make bank.
139
00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:56,263
Yo, that
Tony Robbins dude,
140
00:04:56,263 --> 00:04:58,532
his teeth are so big because
there's diamonds all in them.
141
00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:00,867
Oh, my gosh.
142
00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:02,135
Whoo.
143
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:03,303
I'm -- I'm --
I'm working.
Okay.
144
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,504
Listen, man, do you
have any idea
145
00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:05,972
how any bills I can get
paid off right now?
146
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,674
Do you?
Water bill -- paid!
147
00:05:07,674 --> 00:05:09,176
We finna be wet.
148
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:12,078
The last three flatscreen
payments -- paid!
149
00:05:12,078 --> 00:05:13,413
Now I can finally go
into that Best Buy
150
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:14,748
without the security guard
chasing me out.
151
00:05:14,748 --> 00:05:18,451
Yo, would you mind kicking me
a few racks for my new venture?
152
00:05:18,451 --> 00:05:21,121
Ray's letting me put on
an open mic night weekly
153
00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:22,389
at, uh, Bar None.
154
00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:23,723
Okay, let's not
get greedy.
155
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:24,724
Right now you're giving me
156
00:05:24,724 --> 00:05:26,126
a "lotto winner's cousin" vibes
right now.
157
00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,427
But you know what
I will do?
158
00:05:27,427 --> 00:05:29,296
I'm gonna go get
some champagne.
159
00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:30,564
You know what else
I'm gonna get?
160
00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:32,132
I'm gonna get the dino egg
oatmeal you love so much
161
00:05:32,132 --> 00:05:33,400
so we can celebrate
when I get back.
162
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:34,201
Yes!
163
00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:35,535
Yeah.
Put 'er there.
164
00:05:35,535 --> 00:05:37,037
That's dynamic duo vibes
right there.
165
00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:38,939
Dude, I feel lighter, man.
I do.
166
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:40,507
The air is clearer.
167
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,175
Now that I'm monied,
I'm going out.
168
00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:43,677
And getting that
dino egg oatmeal.
169
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,278
See you later.
Peace.
170
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:47,247
[ "It's the Most Wonderful Time
of the Year" plays ]
171
00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:49,583
♪ It's the most
wonderful time ♪
172
00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:50,750
Ooh!
173
00:05:50,750 --> 00:05:51,885
♪ Of the year ♪
174
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,154
♪ Dingdong, dingdong ♪
175
00:05:54,154 --> 00:05:56,022
♪ With the kids jingle belling ♪
176
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,258
Ugh! Ugh!
Which one, which one?
177
00:05:58,258 --> 00:06:01,194
♪ Be of good cheer ♪
178
00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:03,263
I can get both, and I'll get one
for my little friend, Doug,
179
00:06:03,263 --> 00:06:05,198
because I just --
I got it like that.
180
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:07,868
♪ Time of the year ♪
181
00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:10,704
♪ It's the hap-happiest ♪
[ Whistling ]
182
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,172
♪ Season of all ♪
183
00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:15,342
So, on? Off? On?
On. Alright.
184
00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:18,411
♪ With those holiday greetings
and gay happy meetings ♪
[ Beeps ]
185
00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:20,513
♪ When friends come to call ♪
How are ya?
186
00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:23,116
May I please get a large
quadruple espresso
187
00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:26,586
with your most expensive,
bougiest milk?
188
00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:29,055
And is caramel drizzle
extra?
Yes.
189
00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:31,558
Well, then, a caramel drizzle
I shall have.
190
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:32,926
Thank you.
191
00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:34,194
♪ It's the most ♪
192
00:06:34,194 --> 00:06:35,795
Are you unhoused?
193
00:06:35,795 --> 00:06:36,930
No.
194
00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:39,099
You take that anyway.
195
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:40,533
[ Whispers ]
I won't tell anyone.
196
00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:41,501
♪ Oh, the most ♪
197
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,136
Alright, thank you.
198
00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:45,005
Thank you,
and a good day to you.
199
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:47,507
♪ Of the year ♪
I'm rich, bitch!
200
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:49,175
♪♪
201
00:06:49,175 --> 00:06:50,644
[ FaceTime rings ]
202
00:06:50,644 --> 00:06:52,946
Desperate times call
for desperate measures.
203
00:06:52,946 --> 00:06:54,514
And it doesn't get
more desperate
204
00:06:54,514 --> 00:06:57,250
than being pitied by
a French waiter.
205
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,152
Hey, favorite bro.
206
00:06:59,152 --> 00:07:00,820
Don't tell Devante
I said that.
207
00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,322
[ Chuckles ]
How's life?
208
00:07:02,322 --> 00:07:03,890
Let's skip the pleasantries,
Junior.
209
00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:05,325
I'm halfway through
this ice cream
210
00:07:05,325 --> 00:07:07,761
and every second counts,
alright? What's up?
211
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:11,064
Wow, so, I'm competing for
time with a Popsicle? Got it.
212
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,799
Uh, I'll cut to the chase.
213
00:07:12,799 --> 00:07:14,868
Look, I know that Diane
makes sure
214
00:07:14,868 --> 00:07:16,069
that you keep
something saved up,
215
00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:19,205
so I was wondering
if you could,
216
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:20,740
you know,
loan me some cash?
217
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:22,242
Ooh.
218
00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:24,711
Wait, h-how did you go
from having an apartment,
219
00:07:24,711 --> 00:07:27,514
a full-time job,
and owning your own air fryer
220
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:28,415
to asking me for money?
221
00:07:28,415 --> 00:07:30,717
Hey, I've been
about my studies, okay?
222
00:07:30,717 --> 00:07:32,252
All the money's
going out.
223
00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:34,988
Tempting.
Still a no for me.
224
00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:36,389
Oh, I like them square.
225
00:07:36,389 --> 00:07:39,326
Aw, man, come on.
Dating is expensive.
226
00:07:39,326 --> 00:07:41,728
Man, I just need me a little
something to tide me over, okay?
227
00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:42,896
I'm gonna get
a part-time job,
228
00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:44,064
then I'll be able to
pay you back.
229
00:07:44,064 --> 00:07:45,899
Well, I'm getting to
the gumball eyes,
230
00:07:45,899 --> 00:07:47,600
so this is what
I'm gonna do.
231
00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:49,903
I will send you a little
walking-around money,
232
00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:52,706
but just know at some point, I
will be asking you for a favor.
233
00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:55,842
So no questions asked,
no expiration date,
234
00:07:55,842 --> 00:07:57,143
just stay ready.
235
00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:59,012
Thaaanks.
236
00:07:59,012 --> 00:08:00,981
You're the man.
[ FaceTime ends ]
237
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:05,852
♪♪
238
00:08:05,852 --> 00:08:08,088
Man, this is gonna
spread through
239
00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:10,023
the family text chain
like wildfire.
240
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:13,727
♪♪
241
00:08:13,727 --> 00:08:15,061
Hmm.
242
00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:16,563
Interesting.
243
00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:18,598
Annika: I love you, girl,
but what the hell are we doing?
244
00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:20,800
I just feel like I should
give a symbolic sendoff
245
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:22,035
to my singing career.
246
00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:24,037
Then I can
fully embrace
247
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:28,408
my next exciting chapter
as a mechanical engineer.
248
00:08:28,408 --> 00:08:31,277
Wait, I thought you were gonna
be an occupational therapist?
249
00:08:31,277 --> 00:08:33,613
I haven't decided yet.
Don't box me in.
250
00:08:33,613 --> 00:08:35,348
Okay, I got you.
251
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:38,084
But some of this stuff
is really nice.
252
00:08:38,084 --> 00:08:39,386
Are you sure you don't
want to sell it on eBay?
253
00:08:39,386 --> 00:08:41,488
No, I'm ready to
cut the cord --
254
00:08:41,488 --> 00:08:42,689
no pun intended.
255
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,891
[ Sighs ]
256
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:47,460
Goodbye to
my trusty microphone.
257
00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:49,896
You've been with me through
all my musical phases,
258
00:08:49,896 --> 00:08:52,465
from Christian screamo
to Black gospel.
259
00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:55,535
Yeah, I'd maybe keep that
last one to yourself.
260
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,836
[ Sighs ]
261
00:08:56,836 --> 00:08:58,505
May you sit at
the Lord's right hand.
262
00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,140
[ Thuds ]
Ohhh.
263
00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:03,309
And I was the primary
dish washer in a house of nine,
264
00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:06,446
so needless to say, these hands
are no stranger to a sponge.
265
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:07,714
[ Chuckles ]
266
00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:09,783
Well, it certainly sounds like
you're qualified for the job.
267
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:11,451
Mm-hmm.
Got any questions for me?
268
00:09:11,451 --> 00:09:13,453
One question.
What's starting pay?
269
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:16,189
So we're starting at
$15 an hour.
270
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:20,960
Okay, so if I work 20 hours
a week at $15 an hour,
271
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,962
after state
and federal taxes,
272
00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:26,199
plus Medicare
and Social Security,
273
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:27,934
my actual
take-home is like...
274
00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:29,335
[ Cash register dings ]
275
00:09:29,335 --> 00:09:31,504
...$260?
276
00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:32,972
Give or take.
277
00:09:32,972 --> 00:09:36,276
Junior: Shit, $260? No way.
278
00:09:36,276 --> 00:09:38,378
I need to get paid.
279
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:41,514
I have to go all-in
on the stock market,
280
00:09:41,514 --> 00:09:42,882
because after all...
281
00:09:42,882 --> 00:09:46,119
I say greed is good.
282
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,125
And done.
283
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:53,893
There are a lot of things
I'm bad at,
284
00:09:53,893 --> 00:09:56,429
like parallel parking
or whistling,
285
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,766
and I swear, nobody wants
to see me Griddy.
286
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:03,236
But I have discovered that there
is one thing I'm really good at,
287
00:10:03,236 --> 00:10:06,739
and that is making money.
288
00:10:06,739 --> 00:10:10,210
You see, I was able to take
that money from my brother
289
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:13,713
and invest it in mutuals,
stocks, and NFTs,
290
00:10:13,713 --> 00:10:15,115
sell it at just the right time,
291
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,650
and make bank.
292
00:10:17,650 --> 00:10:20,086
Yo, yo.
293
00:10:20,086 --> 00:10:21,955
Are you going to school
in your pajamas
294
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:23,623
like a hungover,
white sorority girl?
295
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,092
No, bro, I just got caught up
in the biotech trade.
296
00:10:26,092 --> 00:10:28,394
The market is looking
really bullish right now.
297
00:10:28,394 --> 00:10:29,496
Okay.
298
00:10:29,496 --> 00:10:31,931
Well, in the meantime,
get dressed, bro.
299
00:10:31,931 --> 00:10:33,366
We both have classes
across campus in 10.
300
00:10:33,366 --> 00:10:34,434
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll throw something on quick.
301
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:35,902
I'll be
right behind you.
302
00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:37,837
Alright, well, I'm telling
everybody you're taking a dump.
303
00:10:37,837 --> 00:10:40,373
[ Sighs ]
304
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:43,109
♪♪
305
00:10:43,109 --> 00:10:44,978
Maybe just one more trade.
306
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,547
♪ Money, money, money all the
time, what I'm thinkin' 'bout ♪
307
00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:50,283
♪ It's on my mind all the time,
all I think about ♪
308
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:52,685
♪ Pull up in the whip, new drip,
what's your bank account? ♪
309
00:10:52,685 --> 00:10:55,688
♪ Hop up out a drop, stop,
what y'all talkin' 'bout? ♪
310
00:10:55,688 --> 00:10:58,091
♪ Money, money, money,
all I think about ♪
311
00:10:58,091 --> 00:10:59,592
♪ Hop up out the drop, new... ♪
312
00:10:59,592 --> 00:11:01,127
Who's ready for
Wing Wednesday?
313
00:11:01,127 --> 00:11:04,230
What the hell,
Junior?
314
00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:06,166
You haven't moved since
I left nine hours ago.
315
00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,168
It's these damn
Chinese markets, man.
316
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:11,004
I can't take my eyes off them.
They are so shifty.
317
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,839
The -- The markets,
not the people.
318
00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:14,007
I'm not racist.
319
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,943
Okay, how about
we get you up?
320
00:11:16,943 --> 00:11:18,244
Yeah.
321
00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:20,847
It's the bulls
and the bears, man.
322
00:11:20,847 --> 00:11:24,551
Maybe it is time for you to take
a bathroom break, huh, buddy?
323
00:11:24,551 --> 00:11:25,818
Understood.
324
00:11:25,818 --> 00:11:26,853
Alright.
325
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,388
Understood.
326
00:11:28,388 --> 00:11:30,123
Lauryn:
Okay, here we go.
327
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:34,060
Taking the first step on my
new way to becoming a CPA.
328
00:11:34,060 --> 00:11:36,329
Are you sure you
want to do this?
329
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:38,331
I just can't see you
being about that whole
330
00:11:38,331 --> 00:11:40,466
calculators and
pencil skirts life.
331
00:11:40,466 --> 00:11:42,268
Absolutely.
332
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:47,273
So...what's up with
you and Junior?
333
00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,175
You were,
to borrow your phrase,
334
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:50,977
very shady
to him the other day.
335
00:11:50,977 --> 00:11:52,545
Oh, please.
336
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:54,180
He's a big boy.
He can take it.
337
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:58,985
And I'm a big girl who's totally
over the whole situation.
338
00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:01,888
Are you sure
you're fine?
339
00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:03,323
Never been better.
340
00:12:03,323 --> 00:12:07,026
Are you sure
you're fine?
341
00:12:07,026 --> 00:12:10,630
Totally, totally.
342
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:12,031
[ Sighs ]
343
00:12:12,031 --> 00:12:13,433
Guess we are just
two girls
344
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,268
who are
totally fine and cool
345
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:18,137
with their
current situations.
346
00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:19,872
Looks like it.
347
00:12:19,872 --> 00:12:22,075
♪ Yo ♪
348
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,977
♪ Uh ♪
349
00:12:23,977 --> 00:12:26,512
♪ Yo, all I care about
is countin' money ♪
350
00:12:26,512 --> 00:12:29,382
♪ All I care about
is countin' money ♪
351
00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:31,184
They say money never sleeps,
352
00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:32,919
and I just got
a major stock tip
353
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,687
on Latex
from WallStreetBets,
354
00:12:34,687 --> 00:12:37,890
so all I have to do is keep
my eyes on the prize...
355
00:12:37,890 --> 00:12:39,726
Phones away,
Mr. Johnson.
356
00:12:39,726 --> 00:12:41,327
...and take my Anthro test
357
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,763
and sell
at just the right time.
358
00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:46,032
And they say men
can't multitask.
359
00:12:46,032 --> 00:12:48,401
[ Cellphone chimes ]
Oh, here we go.
360
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:50,336
Just a few dollars away
from my target.
361
00:12:50,336 --> 00:12:52,872
Johnson, I said
put the phone away.
362
00:12:52,872 --> 00:12:54,140
This is not
an open-book quiz.
363
00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:56,576
[ Cellphone chimes ]
364
00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:59,946
Uh, th-this -- this is
a financial emergency, sir.
365
00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:01,848
I just -- I need to do
one more thing.
366
00:13:01,848 --> 00:13:03,149
I don't care if it's
World War III.
367
00:13:03,149 --> 00:13:05,051
I said put it away.
Now.
368
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:06,786
[ Cellphone chimes ]
369
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,689
♪♪
370
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:10,790
[ Cellphone chimes ]
371
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:14,460
♪♪
372
00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:15,928
[ Sighs ]
373
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:17,730
I gotta go.
374
00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:19,165
Sorry.
375
00:13:19,165 --> 00:13:22,068
Come on, come on.
376
00:13:22,068 --> 00:13:23,369
[ Cellphone chimes ]
377
00:13:23,369 --> 00:13:25,204
Yes! Yes!
378
00:13:25,204 --> 00:13:27,073
Sold just in time!
379
00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:30,710
Black Warren Buffett!
380
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:32,612
Ooh, ooh.
381
00:13:32,612 --> 00:13:33,746
Oh.
382
00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:36,449
I took the liberty of grading
your quiz early for you.
383
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:38,151
And we'll be discussing
your performance,
384
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,086
or lack thereof,
after class.
385
00:13:40,086 --> 00:13:45,291
♪♪
386
00:13:45,291 --> 00:13:48,394
The F is for [bleep]
387
00:13:54,033 --> 00:13:55,535
Professor Wilkes:
Look, Junior.
388
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:59,172
I know not everybody shares my
passion for tribal anthropology,
389
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:02,141
but that was incredibly
disrespectful.
390
00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:03,910
What's going on?
391
00:14:03,910 --> 00:14:06,179
Okay, uh,
in all honesty,
392
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:09,982
I got into investing as a way
to sort of pay my way here.
393
00:14:09,982 --> 00:14:12,652
But it is really hard
to plan around
394
00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,520
class and the market
and --
395
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,989
You just have to be
ready to pounce.
396
00:14:16,989 --> 00:14:19,292
Much like
the Batwa pygmy tribe
397
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,993
pounced on
the Ugandan government
398
00:14:20,993 --> 00:14:22,995
to reclaim
their ancestral land.
399
00:14:22,995 --> 00:14:24,897
Don't pander to me,
Johnson.
400
00:14:24,897 --> 00:14:25,998
Sorry.
401
00:14:25,998 --> 00:14:27,633
Look,
finances are important,
402
00:14:27,633 --> 00:14:30,503
but if they take away from
your commitment to college,
403
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,038
what's it all for?
404
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:34,741
You're right, Professor.
School comes first.
405
00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:36,509
Trading will...
406
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,311
just have to go on
the back burner for now.
407
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,913
And I highly suggest you take
the extra credit that I sent.
408
00:14:40,913 --> 00:14:41,981
You need it.
409
00:14:41,981 --> 00:14:43,249
Will do.
410
00:14:43,249 --> 00:14:44,851
Uh, and to
show my gratitude,
411
00:14:44,851 --> 00:14:49,155
next class, there's a shiny,
red apple with your name on it.
412
00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:51,157
Please exit
my classroom.
413
00:14:51,157 --> 00:14:53,025
Got it. Yes, sir.
414
00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:56,863
Alright, and before we
dive into today's lesson
415
00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:59,699
about the very exciting History
of the Minstrel Show,
416
00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:01,401
first I have a
quick announcement to make.
417
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,302
And that is, there will be
no class next Tuesday.
418
00:15:03,302 --> 00:15:05,538
[ Cheers and applause ]
419
00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:07,373
Very rude response,
but moving on.
420
00:15:07,373 --> 00:15:08,808
The reason
we won't be meeting
421
00:15:08,808 --> 00:15:11,778
is because I have another talk
to give at Metaverse, okay?
422
00:15:11,778 --> 00:15:13,880
So if you guys want some
comped tickets, let me know.
423
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:15,181
I've got cash to spare.
424
00:15:15,181 --> 00:15:17,316
Tomato, tomato, tomato.
No.
425
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:20,019
Alright, that's also another
highly inappropriate response.
426
00:15:20,019 --> 00:15:21,354
I blame your parents,
honestly.
427
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:23,589
Well, actually, it's
a pretty appropriate response
428
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:24,791
to you being BFFs
429
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:27,493
with a socially irresponsible
company like Metaverse.
430
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:30,897
In fact, I'd call it low-key
gracious, unlike Metaverse.
431
00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:32,031
What are you two
talking about?
432
00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:34,300
You don't know?
[ Scoffs ]
433
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:36,402
And he asks us to cite
our sources, like...
434
00:15:36,402 --> 00:15:38,004
They do a shit ton of
shady things
435
00:15:38,004 --> 00:15:39,272
to protect
their bottom line.
436
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:41,040
They exploit laborers
to save money,
437
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,408
and they heavily
discourage them
438
00:15:42,408 --> 00:15:43,910
from forming
their own unions.
439
00:15:43,910 --> 00:15:45,378
Yeah, but that's all alleged,
right?
440
00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:47,447
You know "alleged"
is just journalist
441
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,216
for "it's true,
but don't sue us"?
442
00:15:50,216 --> 00:15:52,618
Okay, well,
thank you guys so much
443
00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:53,920
for bringing this to
my attention.
444
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,255
I will, uh, look into it,
alright?
445
00:15:56,255 --> 00:15:59,992
Let's --
Oh, it's actually kind of crazy
you didn't know this, Professor.
446
00:15:59,992 --> 00:16:01,828
Yeah, it kind of feels
like you should
447
00:16:01,828 --> 00:16:03,262
give A's
for the semester
448
00:16:03,262 --> 00:16:05,097
to the students
who told you about it.
449
00:16:05,097 --> 00:16:06,899
Thank you, Zaara and Kiela.
450
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:08,434
Your aggressive informing
is appreciated,
451
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:10,369
but now I have
a class to teach.
452
00:16:10,369 --> 00:16:13,773
♪♪
453
00:16:13,773 --> 00:16:17,343
Okay, this is my specialty drink
I've been working on.
454
00:16:17,343 --> 00:16:20,379
It is called "The Dirty Doug."
455
00:16:20,379 --> 00:16:21,581
Boom.
456
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:24,917
Yeah, I'd workshop that name
a little more, if I were you.
457
00:16:24,917 --> 00:16:27,086
Okay. Damn.
458
00:16:27,086 --> 00:16:29,021
Everything alright?
459
00:16:29,021 --> 00:16:31,357
Everything's great!
We're celebrating.
460
00:16:31,357 --> 00:16:34,794
Because today, I decided
I'm gonna be an architect.
461
00:16:34,794 --> 00:16:35,995
Oh, dope.
462
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,296
So now
we're an architect?
463
00:16:37,296 --> 00:16:39,298
Girl, you're giving me
whiplash.
464
00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:41,200
First you wanted to be
an occupational therapist,
465
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:44,570
then an accountant,
then a marine biologist,
466
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:46,272
then a crypt keeper.
467
00:16:46,272 --> 00:16:48,841
I don't want to be
any of those things.
468
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:51,377
What I want is
to be a singer,
469
00:16:51,377 --> 00:16:55,014
but I made a deal
with my parents.
470
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,149
Look, no disrespect to
your moms and pops,
471
00:16:57,149 --> 00:16:59,185
but I know what it's like
to take the safe path
472
00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:01,654
and still have it blow up,
right?
473
00:17:01,654 --> 00:17:03,489
Any road you take, I mean,
474
00:17:03,489 --> 00:17:05,625
you're gonna have
some kind of risk.
475
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:09,428
So why not risk it on something
that you love, right?
476
00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:12,231
Look, actually, I'm doing
an open mic night here.
477
00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:15,368
No pressure, but sign up.
478
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:17,637
I mean, you'd be able to
scratch that singing itch
479
00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:19,472
and then at the same time,
480
00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:23,009
do your accounting thing
on the side.
481
00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:25,044
Just don't do no math
on my stage, okay?
482
00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:28,047
[ Chuckles ]
Okay. Thank you.
483
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,181
Yeah.
See?
484
00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:31,183
Aren't you glad
we came out?
485
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:34,654
And I'm not gonna lie --
this drink's not bad.
486
00:17:34,654 --> 00:17:35,922
What's in
a Dirty Doug?
487
00:17:35,922 --> 00:17:37,723
Oh, I can't let you in
on all my secrets.
488
00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:39,258
Sorry.
489
00:17:39,258 --> 00:17:41,661
♪ I won't wait for you ♪
490
00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:43,396
Doug:
Whoo! Alright.
491
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,964
Now we both got a reason
to celebrate.
492
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,432
You have your
boss man talks,
493
00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:49,302
and I have a full roster
for my first open mic night.
494
00:17:49,302 --> 00:17:50,436
Mm-hmm.
495
00:17:50,436 --> 00:17:52,004
I don't really know if I
have much to celebrate, man.
496
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,739
I mean, my kids ripped me
a new one today.
497
00:17:53,739 --> 00:17:55,541
Read me for filth.
W-Wait, bro.
498
00:17:55,541 --> 00:17:56,576
How can you be sad
499
00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:58,811
when you heard the sound
of a crisp bottle pop,
500
00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:01,113
and I'm wearing the
sweatshirt that you got me.
501
00:18:01,113 --> 00:18:03,649
Now, that -- that is bringing me
some joy, I have to admit.
502
00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:06,686
[ Microwave beeping ]
You know, this is, uh,
fitting a bit snug, though.
503
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,387
That part in particular is
what's bringing me the joy.
504
00:18:08,387 --> 00:18:10,623
Oh! Yes!
505
00:18:10,623 --> 00:18:13,192
It's dino egg
oatmeal time!
506
00:18:13,192 --> 00:18:15,294
I've never seen someone
that excited over oatmeal.
507
00:18:15,294 --> 00:18:16,896
Mmm!
508
00:18:16,896 --> 00:18:18,331
Mmm.
509
00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:20,933
Dino-mite!
510
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,501
Whoo!
511
00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:23,769
Really, man?
512
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,071
Are y-- Are you -- Did you get
that out of your system?
513
00:18:25,071 --> 00:18:26,339
Are you good?
Uh.
514
00:18:26,339 --> 00:18:27,540
'Cause there's seven more
packs in the box,
515
00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:29,208
and I'm not gonna hear
that seven more times.
516
00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:30,943
Mm.
517
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:33,446
Di-no...
Don't you finish it.
518
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:35,715
...miiiiite.
519
00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:36,882
Damn.
520
00:18:36,882 --> 00:18:37,950
I'm good.
521
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,018
I need a new roommate.
522
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:42,788
♪♪
523
00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:47,193
Okay, so maybe Professor Wilkes
is a bit of a Boomer noob,
524
00:18:47,193 --> 00:18:48,694
but he's right.
525
00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:50,129
I gotta buckle down.
526
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,398
I'm here to get an education.
527
00:18:52,398 --> 00:18:56,469
It's the literal
definition of college.
528
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:59,038
[ Sighs ]
529
00:19:01,507 --> 00:19:06,646
"As the largest living group
of hunter-gatherers,
530
00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:09,749
the Pygmy people of Cameroon
531
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:14,954
are constantly fighting
to protect their way of life."
532
00:19:14,954 --> 00:19:16,522
Hm.
533
00:19:16,522 --> 00:19:20,359
Whew! That thesis sentence
was a doozy.
534
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:24,296
I think I've earned a quick
peek at the ol' S&P, don't you?
535
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:29,702
No, no, no!
No, we are not doing this.
536
00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:32,004
College is for education.
537
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,206
You'll be glad you did
a report on the Pygmies
538
00:19:34,206 --> 00:19:36,142
one day out in the real world.
539
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:41,347
But is that what college
is for?
540
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:44,817
Aren't we here so we can make
money in the real world?
541
00:19:44,817 --> 00:19:48,554
This class is costing me
48 hours of open market time!
542
00:19:48,554 --> 00:19:51,123
That could be tens
of thousands of dollars!
543
00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:53,125
Listen, C's get degrees.
544
00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:54,894
So if the choice is
between straight A's
545
00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:56,962
or being straight flush
with cash,
546
00:19:56,962 --> 00:19:58,531
all I know is...
547
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,200
I choose rich every
[bleep] time.
548
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:02,301
♪ Game over ♪
549
00:20:06,138 --> 00:20:08,541
[ Indistinct conversations ]
550
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:09,775
Okay, I'm almost up.
551
00:20:09,775 --> 00:20:11,010
I can do this.
552
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:12,978
Right? Maybe?
553
00:20:12,978 --> 00:20:14,413
Oh,
absolutely.
554
00:20:14,413 --> 00:20:15,347
You got this.
555
00:20:15,347 --> 00:20:16,749
You're right.
I can do this.
556
00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:18,050
Zaara: 100%.
557
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:19,118
I've got this.
558
00:20:19,118 --> 00:20:20,553
Doug: Please welcome
our next singer,
559
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:22,088
GoGo, to the stage.
560
00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:25,725
♪ How you introduce me
as just the homie? ♪
561
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:27,326
♪ I caught that ♪
562
00:20:27,326 --> 00:20:30,062
♪ But when we're alone,
you be all up on me ♪
563
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:31,263
[ Cheering ]
564
00:20:31,263 --> 00:20:32,465
♪ How 'bout that? ♪
565
00:20:32,465 --> 00:20:34,900
♪ You love me
when it's convenient ♪
566
00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:37,136
♪ Can never tell
when you mean it ♪
567
00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:39,205
♪ If you're not all the way
in it ♪
568
00:20:39,205 --> 00:20:40,306
♪ Maybe you should let
someone else get it ♪
569
00:20:40,306 --> 00:20:42,174
Hey, Lauryn,
good luck following that.
570
00:20:42,174 --> 00:20:44,043
♪ 'Cause you ain't
really tryna grow ♪
571
00:20:44,043 --> 00:20:46,445
That was
the right choice.
572
00:20:46,445 --> 00:20:49,048
♪♪