[narrator] Previously on Before The 90 Days...
[Vanja chuckles] Looks like you've done this before.
[woman 1]
[all laughing]
No. [continues speaking English]
Why would I be coming all the way here for a friend?
[all exclaiming]
I feel like this connection is real,
so I honestly don't know why he would say we're just friends.
-Bye. I'll see you tomorrow. -[Bozo] Good night.
-Thank you. -[Bozo] Chao. Chao.
I am hoping for a change in behavior,
[sighing] but I might have been a fool all along.
[speaking in English]
-Well... -When?
I will have to see when I get back to the States.
[Niles] Like, I can do the knocking. The knocking ceremony,
it's essentially the official engagement.
I thought this would be a compromise
between postponing the wedding and going through with it.
[Matilda speaking English]
Okay.
[Matilda] This is not the way it's supposed to be done.
[continues in English]
Are you excited to go to Turkey to see Adnan?
Well, he has an issue with my male health care practitioners.
He wants to have all women.
[continues in English]
This trip is supposed to be about baby making,
but what he's doing is like a total slap in the face.
[Rayne] I asked Chidi to move to a hotel with me.
It turned into the entire family just ganging up on me.
But he said he wanted to see me tomorrow.
Maybe he might be coming to his senses.
[Chidi speaking English]
[speaking English]
[Sunny]
[Veah] Sunny!
[Veah] Sunny, stop!
[Sunny] I'm not playing with you. Go back home.
I'm done with you.
[speaking English]
I was building up the confidence to tell him about Rory being here.
I never wanted him to find out like this.
I feel like I messed everything up.
[upbeat music playing]
Hey, babe. How are you doing today?
I'm fine.
We're off to Kumasi, aren't we?
[speaking English]
Mm.
I, uh, will have to tell them what I told you last night.
Yeah.
I was like, huh?
I hope and I know that very soon you will come back for me.
Mm-hmm.
And that ring on your finger is my promise to do so.
Today we are going to Kumasi to see my family,
and we have to break the news to them.
They will definitely ask, that what happened?
That's what they will, they will ask.
[Niles] Will they still let me do the knocking?
I don't know.
Are you worried?
Just a little. I am a little worried about that.
Yes.
[Matilda] Me too.
[Matilda in English]
-[Niles] Okay. -[Matilda] Pray.
Dear Heavenly Father,
when we're in the air, keep us there until it's time to time to land.
When I get to Kumasi, allow me to retain my courage.
In Jesus' name, we pray.
-Amen. -Amen.
Hmm.
I'm greatly relieved that Matilda has accepted my apology.
I'm just praying that God works another miracle for me
and that her family is as forgiving as she is.
[chuckles]
Eventually it'll become like riding in a car.
Except, you know, there's no, there's no land underneath you.
[Matilda speaking]
[Niles] Are you ready to fly?
[Matilda chuckling]
[Niles speaking]
I'm so lucky to have Niles to spoil me like this.
It'll be okay.
[Matilda] And I know he loves me very much.
[Niles speaking]
[laughing]
[Matilda speaking]
-[Niles speaking] -[Matilda] Mm-hmm.
[Niles speaking]
[Matilda speaking]
[laughing]
[groovy music playing]
[Matilda] So how do you see Kumasi?
I see Kumasi as being very beautiful.
-It's, has a very homey look to it. -Mm-hmm.
-[Niles] Okay. -Mm-hmm.
A lot of Matilda's extended family live in her house and...
Well, that might be a bit over stimulating for me.
So we're going to go ahead and just stay at a hotel in Kumasi,
which is a city very close to her hometown of Offinso.
[Niles] Hello. [receptionist] Good evening. Welcome.
You can have the keys. That's your room, 1218.
It's on the second floor. Enjoy your stay.
-Thank you. -Thank you so much.
I'm not gonna lie.
I'm glad that we're staying in a hotel in Kumasi
because that gives me a little bit of time
before I have to tell her family the news.
[exhales]
[Niles] It is going to be difficult, though,
and there's a very real chance that I've...
That I've already blown it.
If things go south,
it's, it's going to be a disaster
for me and Matilda moving forward.
And, er...
I can't exactly say that it's anyone else's fault, but my own.
[traditional music playing]
[Vanja] Oh, my goodness, this is amazing.
Even though last night did not go as planned,
I'm feeling a little better about today.
I am super happy to be here with him, to get to meet him...
in real life and get to spend the time with him.
But obviously, what he said last night was super confusing
because one moment he's so excited,
happy to see me, hugging me,
telling me all these beautiful compliments and everything.
And then the next moment, he's turning around
and saying, "Oh, We're just friends."
So it's just a lot of mixed signals.
My first night in Split just started off on a really bad note.
He told me everyone that we were just friends, and that was humiliating.
It made me feel awful.
And then to top it all off,
Bozo didn't even want to spend the night on the couch
to maximize our time together,
and I just... I couldn't believe it.
We just met.
I'm just fresh off the airplane.
Um, so I'm hoping that that's what it is. [laughs]
I just want to see how he acts today.
I want to see how he is this fresh new day.
Okay.
-[Bozo laughing] -[Vanja squeals]
Good morning.
[chuckles] Thank you.
You look handsome in blue.
What is this?
Uh...
-Oh, my God. -Yeah. [chuckles]
Thank you. So kind of you.
Last night was a little bit awkward
because I think Vanja and I are slightly on different pages.
I think that Vanja came to Croatia for a great relationship.
But she just wants it...immediately,
and I'm just taking the, step by step.
And sometimes it feels a little bit too much for me.
I'm hoping that today can be a fresh start,
and I'm looking forward to getting to know her better.
And to find the chemistry that we felt over online.
[Vanja] Your wish is my command.
-[Bozo speaking] -Mm-hmm.
Okay.
[Vanja] Oh, my goodness! This is amazing.
[Bozo speaking]
-No, it's not. -[Bozo chuckling]
-But-- -Stop lying.
[Vanja chuckles]
[Bozo speaking]
[chuckles] 'Cause you're so tiny?
I am.
Thank you.
What? That's funny.
[Vanja speaking]
[Bozo humming, singing]
♪♪ Vanja♪
♪♪ Vanja...♪
♪♪ Vanja♪
-You gotta keep going. -[Bozo speaking]
It's super romantic.
No, no, no. Keep going.
[continues singing]
[chuckles]
[singing] ♪♪ And likes Bozo♪
[both laugh]
That was great. Just great.
Thank you. Thank you.
-It is because of the place. -True story.
[Vanja] This is the Bozo that I've been expecting.
And this is who I fell for.
This is the jokester that always made me laugh during the last eight months.
So when do I meet your friends?
Uh, tomorrow night.
-Is that okay with you? -Yes.
So who do I get to meet?
Okay. Uh, still don't know.
-Let's see who will up here. -Mm-hmm.
Like, yeah, a few of them.
Please.
Thank you. You're such a gentleman.
Yes, I would.
This would be awesome.
-Speaking of family. -Yeah.
What did you tell your family about me coming here?
-Really? -And I was like, "Mom, calm down.--"
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But why didn't you tell her about me?
I mean, so she's hoping that you marry me.
But why? What does she know about me?
[Bozo] Uh...
So she thinks we're a good match.
[Vanja] Okay.
So do I get to meet her?
[Vanja] Oh, my God!
Yes!
-Yes! That would be amazing. -Okay.
How about your aunt? What'd you tell to your aunt?
[Vanja] Okay. Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I hope, in a sense, if we're gonna fall in love,
but at this moment, I know how I feel...
and in these few days I want to see as well how it goes.
But we already said, "I love you."
We already like... We talked online for so long.
We're sharing our feelings, and, and...
I said that, all those things when,
when you were not here.
That is just something that, with me cannot happen over the night.
That's fair, but I don't think we're just friends.
I'm here to pursue a relationship with you.
I mean, I've been single for six years,
and, and with you, I've been able
-to find somebody that I really click with, and... -Mm-hmm.
We have so much in common, and...
I put my life off for three weeks
to come and spend time with you and see where this goes,
because for me, this is serious.
[Vanja] Well...
[Bozo] And I was looking forward to meet you,
-and see where it-- -[bleeps]
But has there been chemistry so far?
He does not want to see me.
He wants nothing to do with me.
You've been through a lot of [bleep] in your life.
Have you tried opening up to him a little?
I think that would probably be a good start.
If you really know all the ins and outs, it's, it's not pretty.
[cell phone dings]
[Rayne] Chidi asked me to meet him at the beach.
I believe it could be a good sign.
[Chidi] I'm happy to see you.
[Rayne] Me too.
[speaking English]
So, what do you wanna talk about?
Have you decided what you want to do?
Do you want to hang out more with me or...
[soft music playing]
Sunny broke up with me.
And when Sunny left, I just felt alone, scared...
and just really sad.
Heartbroken.
He hasn't said anything.
I haven't reached out.
No, nothing.
[cellphone beeps]
Sunny read my message right now.
It says, Sunny is responding now.
It says, he is typing.
[cellphone dings]
He says, "I don't want to talk to you.
Just leave me alone."
[cellphone beeps]
I really wanted Sunny to stay last night.
I just wanted Sunny to understand.
Rory came with me because I didn't feel like I could travel alone.
But I feel like Sunny just threw our whole relationship,
us, our love,
our whole year of talking, I feel like Sunny just threw it all out.
Last night, I... I didn't show a lot of emotion.
I wasn't crying.
I just showed more of anger.
Growing up, we weren't really allowed to show emotions.
And that's still something I struggled with.
That was just not really a thing growing up.
I never really saw my family cry,
so I don't think that Sunny understands how hurt I am about all of this.
And how upset I actually am.
[crying] I take full responsibility for... [sniffles]
...um, our fight.
I'm feeling like our relationship is over right now.
And Sunny doesn't want to be with me.
[sniffles]
[Veah] Hello.
[driver speaking]
I'm going to the shopping plaza,
I just didn't want to stay in the room anymore.
[Veah] I called Rory to meet me.
I'm really anxious to be here alone.
But, I asked Rory to meet me at the market and not the hotel,
because I didn't want Sunny to come back and see Rory there.
And then he's like, " Oh, all my suspicions are confirmed
like, you and Rory like each other, you and Rory are doing things."
I don't want to make the situation with Sunny worse.
[Veah] Hello.
-[Veah] This is pineapple. -[woman speaking]
[Veah] What is that?
[Veah] What's achar?
[woman speaking]
-Yeah, I think I'll just get a pineapple. -[woman speaking]
[woman speaking]
[Veah] Thank you.
And then you have Apple Pay?
Like, where you put your phone next to the scanner.
You don't have a machine?
-You don't have that? -No.
Oh, I don't have cash.
[woman exclaims]
[woman speaking]
[Veah] Okay, hold on.
[Rory over phone]
Rory where are you? Are you close?
[Rory speaking]
[Veah] Okay, I didn't realize that
they don't take Apple Pay here.
-And I got pineapple. -[Rory speaking]
[Veah] Do you have cash?
[Rory speaking]
-Okay, could you come cover it for me, please? -[Rory speaking]
-[Veah] Oh, there you are. -[Rory] What's up?
[Veah speaking]
Hello. Yeah.
-You're not carrying cash yet. -No.
[Rory] You rookie.
-Well, I haven't been here... -How much is it?
[woman speaking]
[Rory] In fact, I will take one.
[woman speaking]
Oh, thank you very much.
Wait, do they have like, change in their money too?
Oh, that's cool. Thank you.
-[woman speaking] -[Rory] Thank you so much.
You too. Bye.
[Veah] Thank you. Bye.
[Rory] So what's going on?
He saw a picture of us on the airplane.
[Veah] And then he just like, said he was done with me.
[Rory] And he's not talking to you or nothing?
He's probably just mad because it was, you know, how sudden that he found out.
[Rory] I mean, he definitely has every right to feel betrayed.
But, you got to...
You got to find a way to get this kid back in your life.
Can't let something stupid like me being here
ruin the whole thing.
He said he doesn't want to see me, Rory. That's not even an option.
He does not want to see me. He wants nothing to do with me.
He's done with me. He wants me, to get on the plane and go home.
I think you can do it. Say, "Hey, I'm sorry.
I [bleep] up.
Here's what I'm gonna do to make it right."
[Rory] He probably feels threatened, by that I'm here.
And he feels in the dark,
-Yeah. -because he doesn't fully understand you, I think.
That's... that's probably it.
[Rory] You've been through a lot of [bleep] in your life
and it's gonna be hard for you to trust people.
But if you tried opening up to him a little bit about that,
I think that would probably be a good start.
[Rory] That's probably what he wants.
All right.
[Rory speaking]
[Rory] If you really know all the ins and outs, it's... it's not pretty.
And...
They definitely need to address that.
Hopefully, if they are meant for each other, she can make it right.
♪♪ You said you'll never Let me down ♪
♪♪ You said that You'll be there to hold me ♪
♪♪ Be my one and only ♪
♪♪ So let's run, run, run ♪
♪♪ Anywhere you Want, want, want ♪
♪♪ I can show you own me Show me ♪
[car honking]
[Rayne] Damn these people get close.
It's been lonely and scary staying at the hotel by myself
for the last three days.
I have not seen Chidi, and we still have not even discussed
anything about what happened at his sister's place before I left.
[Rayne] Yesterday, I got a text from Chidi.
He asked me to meet him at the beach.
I believe it could be a good sign,
because he knows that I love the outdoors and fishing,
so hopefully, he's ready to move forward like I am.
[Raye] He had a lot of time to think about him and I,
and now I'm hoping that he would actually
be like I really want to go with you to the hotel.
I want to start hanging out with you now.
I had a talk with my sister.
Blah, blah, blah, and she said it was okay.
[chuckles]
Or whether she likes it or not,
I'm a man, either way, you know what I mean?
[Rayne] We'll see.
[Chidi speaking]
[Rayne] Right here. [chuckles]
[Rayne] Thank you.
[Rayne] Chidi.
-[Chidi] Yeah. -What's up?
Oh, babe, you are here?
[Rayne speaking] Hey, honey.
-It's nice. -Yeah!
[Rayne] Yeah, It's nice here.
Yeah, you're welcome.
I'm happy to see you.
[Rayne] Me too.
-Um... -You want to go for a walk?
Yeah, I would like us to go to the beach.
-Shall we? -Yeah.
-Here, look, step over this curb. -[Chidi] Okay.
-[Chidi] Thank you. Thank you. -[Rayne chuckles] Come here.
[Rayne] Meeting Chidi again, it's like, I'm feeling a little like, cautious,
and apprehensive, but it is good to see him.
[Rayne] Every time I see a smile,
I just can't help but melt a little bit.
[Rayne] We'll stop right here so the bank don't give out.
[Chidi] Oh, okay.
[Chidi] Wow.
[Chidi speaking]
[Rayne] There's a nice old boat here.
-[Rayne] You want to sit? -[Chidi] Boat?
Look, you can sit here.
-Sit right here. -Oh.
And I'll sit over here.
-Wooden boat. -[Rayne] Yeah.
-[Chidi] Wow. -[Reyne] Look, there's crabs in here.
-[Chidi] In here? Oh. -Yeah, they're dead.
-[Chidi] Okay, they are dead. -Yeah. I didn't know you had crabs, Chidi.
Of course,
[both chuckle]
So, what do you want to talk about?
Have you decided what you want to do?
Do you want to hang out more with me or...
[Chidi speaking]
You know, I was surprised how you just came, all of a sudden.
-How-- -[Rayne] You know, your sister and I are not on good terms.
You have to remember that I'm not going to stay somewhere
in somebody's house where we're not on good terms.
-But, but, but. -And you realize this is a new day,
-Yeah. -and I'm just saying like, something big needs to happen,
because my time is more than halfway over.
[Chidi] Yeah, I am aware of that.
But, you know, before you came...
Well, yeah, you know me. In the long run, there's a reason.
And now this extreme blow up, now you see the reason.
I believe we have a different and distinct
um, opinions about that.
Okay. You know, one of these days, you'll find a woman
who will sit there at your sister's all day,
twenty four hours a day, seven days a week.
-[Chidi] Babe, um... -[Rayne] Not me. No, thank you.
You're just-- All you want to do is go run to your sister's.
-Run to your sister's. I'm not running. -No, no babe.
-You're not coming to the hotel. -[Chidi] No...
-So what do you want? -[Chidi] Babe.
-We're here. Here. -[Rayne] No, what do you want? What do you want to hear?
-I'm just telling you that. My days are-- -[Chidi] To talk about...
Come on. My days are--
Here, touch yourself. That's what you're used to.
[Rayne] I'm very frustrated for Chidi to be harping on this sister and family.
and how none of them are the bad guy.
They can do no wrong in his eyes.
I'm done with all their drama.
[producer speaking]
I don't ever feel like I overreact.
What I'm trying to say is, like, let's just be cool for once.
-Do you understand? -You just don't like what I'm saying.
-[Chidi] No! -That's your problem,
-Is you don't like what I'm saying, -[Chidi] No, I like--
so you assume, I'm yelling I'm screaming, I'm this, I'm that.
-[Rayne] So, like, okay, I get you, I get you. -Can I talk? Can I talk?
Can I talk?
Go for it, Junior.
[Chidi speaking]
[Rayne speaking]
-The only time she came to the room, was the time-- -I would love to go out there,
-[Chidi] No, the only time she came... -and sail out into that open
-[Chidi] to clean up the room. -ocean, like, oh, my God, look! A big ass green ship.
It's really nice because you can see the tall buildings way out there, on the right.
[Rayne shushes]
-Breathe. -[Chidi] You just want me to do everything,
-without you hearing me out? -Look at the net.
-You want to go down there and walk in the water. -Oh, my God.
-Ssh! We've been through the same thing over and over. -Will you let me explain?
-I see you're sucking your sister's tits. -[Chidi] No, no.
You're never gonna let go.
-Calm down. -Are you sharing the milk or what?
[Chidi] She just says anything that comes to her head.
She told me, she never had any healthy relationship.
[Chidi] She has never felt love.
But I believe Rayne pushes love away,
with her rash and hostile and aggressive behavior.
[Chidi] You know what?
[Chidi speaking]
[Rayne] Yeah.
[Chidi speaking]
[Chidi] If you want people to love you,
if you want people to respect you,
you should learn how to respect others.
With this kind of attitude, there is no way
your relationship is going to be healthy.
It is sad.
So, you're done? You want to talk about me?
You know what hurts me most?
-[Chidi] Yeah. -Five and a half years after telling you
that I was with men that turned to heroin,
crack, cocaine and drugs,
and because I chose to not put up with their [bleep]
and because I chose to move on.
And saying the problem is me.
-You know what? The problem is you. -[Chidi] No.
The problem is the human freaking race.
All you try to do is hurt others.
And you want to call that love? [bleep]
Let me tell you this, my relationships was my choice to be alone.
Do you understand?
So, you better learn to chill
because you're messing with the wrong freaking ass person.
[dramatic music playing]
[upbeat music playing]
[Tigerlily sighs]
-[Tigerlily] Hi. -Hi, welcome.
Perfect.
[reading] "My love, I can't wait to see you.
The driver will bring you to me, your husband."
Normally, I would be thrilled to get into a car
and have flowers and a card from my husband waiting for me.
[Tigerlily] But after seeing the shirtless photo
he posted on social media,
I'm feeling totally disrespected by Adnan.
And a card, and some flowers are not going to change that.
[Tigerlily] My initial plan for this trip,
was to enjoy time with my husband,
and, yes, work on some issues.
While we still work on baby making,
But now, with this photo,
that has all gone out the window.
-[knocks on door] -[Adnan] Come in, baby. Come in.
[Tigerlily] Oh, gosh, here we go.
[Adnan speaking]
What did you do, baby?
[Adnan speaking]
[Tigerlily] What did you do, honey?
I miss you.
[Adnan speaking]
[Tigerlily] Fine.
Adnan has flowers everywhere and candles everywhere,
and I'm just not having it.
You're not just going to try and schmooze my anger away.
[Adnan speaking]
[Tigerlily] Ready for what?
-[Tigerlily] Oh. -[both chuckle]
[Tigerlily] I'm just gonna take this stuff off.
[Adnan speaking]
[both chuckle]
[Tigerlily] Okay.
[Adnan speaking]
Miss you too, baby.
You can't believe what?
Mm-hmm.
[clears throat]
What?
Why are you acting like, everything's fine?
Well, I haven't forgotten.
[exhales]
[Adnan speaking]
Do you care if I'm upset about something?
[Adnan] It's not important.
-[Tigerlily] What-- But it is to me. -Not important.
[Adnan speaking]
How would you feel if I just got out of the shower
and I take a photo of me without a shirt on?
And I post it on my social media.
[Tigerlily] How would you feel?
Would you be upset?
[Adnan speaking]
Okay, so why is it okay for you and not okay for me?
[laughs]
Baby, If I can't do it, you shouldn't be doing it either.
Do you not understand why I say that you have like, this double standard thing?
You don't like it because it's true.
[Adnan speaking]
Well, you're going to keep being angry then, because it's going to be even.
Yeah.
[Tigerlily] Because, I've changed for you.
[Adnan speaking]
-I made the problem. -[Adnan] Yeah, yeah.
[Adnan speaking]
[Tigerlily] This is the problem.
I'm always scared to bring anything up with you
because I don't want to lose you.
And I don't want to lose this.
I should be able to tell you things that bother me.
So, you want me to be fake?
But don't you see that if we have a problem and we don't talk about it,
-and then it, like, more adds on to it, -Okay.
-and then it becomes huge, -We can...
and I don't want it to be like that.
I want to deal with it, when it's small.
I obviously didn't want it to be like this, either.
But, you made me upset,
and I didn't want to just keep it inside.
[Adnan speaking]
[Tigerlily] You're done with what?
[door closes]
[Matilda speaking]
I think, I can tell your mom,
I don't think I've ever once said that we are getting married
in these three weeks that I am here.
Nor did I tell you to tell everybody we were getting married.
[Matilda speaking]
[upbeat music playing]
[Matilda speaking]
-We need to look into some barbers around here. -Okay.
Because trust me, you don't want just anybody doing your hair.
[Matilda] Yeah. Okay.
Today, I'm finally gonna meet Matilda's family.
And, well, even without the fact that I'm about to be bearing bad news to them,
It would be a nerve wracking experience.
They have a barber shop downstairs,
[Matilda] So get ready to go, okay?
[Niles] All right. Give me just a moment.
On the outside, I looked as cool as a cucumber,
but on the inside I've never felt so nervous in my entire life.
It's just... It's a new kind of nervous for me.
[man speaking]
I plan to marry someone from here.
And I just wanted to meet her family,
-Okay. -before we continued further.
Okay. That's good.
She's so excited that she told everyone
that we were getting married
-on this trip-- -Mm-hmm.
When I was on this trip,
and I'm just wondering how I'm gonna explain to them
that even though I promised to marry her, it won't happen on this trip.
They what now?
I don't know what that is, but it doesn't sound like I want to find out.
Hm.
[Niles] Because of my autism,
the truth is already not so easy for me to come forth with.
Now we want to throw curses into the mix.
Good gravy.
I'm a man who believes in God,
but I also think that God will allow other forces
to affect me if he deems I deserve it.
I'm gonna be careful with my promises.
I'm gonna carefully word what I say.
I'm not trying to find out how real these curses actually are.
-Thank you. -You're welcome, sir.
You're welcome.
[Festus hums in amusement]
-[laughs] -It was good talking to you, Festus.
And thank you for cutting my hair.
Okay. You're welcome.
[Matilda]
It's very beautiful.
I know. I'm bracing myself, getting ready.
[laughs]
Oh, bae.
[chuckles]
[Matilda]
-I won't say food-- -[laughs]
-I'll just say stomach problems. -Uh-huh.
[Niles] Yeah.
[Matilda]
Okay, so, I want to choose my words very, very carefully.
[humorous music playing]
[Matilda]
[Matilda] I want you to tell me everything
that you're going to say there.
I'm going to tell them that this,
that this first trip was just to get to know Matilda.
You know, see that, spend some time with you in person.
See if we could be together,
see if we could live together,
we can interact with each other well.
So far we've interacted pretty well.
Most couples would have would have broken up by now
-if they just weren't compatible, -[chuckles]
or couldn't be compatible.
So, yeah, we can make this work.
I also want to--
I also want to tell them that I--
I don't think I ever meant--
Like when I talked to your mom and your sister and Hayford,
I don't think I ever once said that we are getting married
in these three weeks that I am here.
I think I can tell your--
I think I can tell your mom that you never discussed that with me.
Nor did I tell you to tell everybody we were getting married.
[somber music playing]
That was not a lie.
But...
Okay.
-Right? -Right. Okay.
Okay.
All right.
But, you know, the barber said that if I promised it,
and it didn't happen, you guys can curse me.
Mmm.
I should probably put some makeup on
since Sunny is coming over.
And he said, "I'm ready to talk."
I'm really nervous.
If Sunny doesn't want to be with me, then I have to go home.
[Sunny]
[dramatic music playing]
I should probably put some makeup on since Sunny is coming over.
[Veah] This morning, I thought that Sunny
was just completely done with me and our relationship.
But he finally messaged me,
and said that he's ready to talk.
And I'm feeling really good about this.
I really missed him.
And I really just want to talk to him.
I want to hug him.
I want to figure this out with him.
I'm really nervous.
I've been waiting to talk to him.
But I'm feeling like a little anxious about it, like...
I just want him to understand where I come from
and like, my point of view on things.
But if Sunny doesn't want to be with me, then I have to go home.
[Sunny]
Hi. I got you something.
I just want to make things better with you.
Okay.
Thank you so much for red roses,
but still, I want to talk to you
about everything that happened.
[tense music playing]
Let's go to balcony.
Okay, so you really hurt me yesterday,
you truly hurt me, deeply from my heart.
Explain yourself why you do that.
I struggled a lot with the idea
If I should bring Rory or not.
I never meant to hurt your feelings by bringing Rory.
I just...
I was scared to travel alone and I was scared If I didn't--
I didn't think I would get on the plane if I didn't bring him.
Okay, but... It's not just about Rory,
it's about us, that lying each other.
I wanted to be the one to tell you.
I just-- I wanted to tell you before I left,
and then it just didn't feel like the right time because I was scared
you were gonna tell me not to come,
and then I didn't want to create more problems.
I've had a lot of loss in my life,
[sniffles] You know, like...
I was taken away from my parents. [sniffles]
And so I just didn't tell you sooner,
because I was scared for you to leave me
like everyone else.
You know, like I worked really hard
to have the stable life I have today.
But I think that stuff like that has had an effect
on my trust issues and stuff.
-[sniffles] -I do understand that part of it.
I have a lot of things happen to my life.
-When I was young, my father left us, -I know.
me and my mom. I've been telling you those things.
I know we are different,
but listen, I'm trying to tell you like I do understand.
I am been through in a life a lot,
but I'll be honest with you.
I don't understand your relationship with Rory.
There is no romantic feelings between me and Rory.
I'm just close with him, and he's somebody I can trust, and rely on.
I know Rory's family.
Rory knows my family.
Rory is close with my family.
And he's just been there through a lot.
I mean, he was there when my brother passed away.
And...
I do want to tell you that,
right after my brother's death,
me and Rory had a baby that passed away.
[melancholy music playing]
It was just really hard and it was the darkest time of my life.
The hardest thing I've ever been through in my life.
[sniffles]
[Veah] Sunny knows about my brother's death,
but I never told him I was actually pregnant when my brother passed away.
And Rory was the father of the baby.
After my brother's passing, I just felt like I wasn't the same,
and it was just really stressful.
Rory's like, "Let's go to the emergency room,"
and they told us that the baby had lost his heartbeat.
And that's probably a big reason me and Rory are so close.
It's because we were able to cope with the loss of our baby
and we coped with it together.
I've always been kind of scared
to open up to Sunny about that.
But I do think that it's important,
because then he could understand
more about why I brought Rory.
I'm really sorry for your loss.
I just want to say I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner.
My therapist didn't want me to talk about my trauma,
because I was still working through it.
But I'm trying to help you understand
Rory has just been there a lot.
We've been through a lot of hard things together,
but I don't see Rory in any romantic way. At all.
I want to be with you.
I wanted to be with you this whole time.
Hearing that she lost a baby with Rory,
I was shocked.
But I'm really feel sorry for them,
and it's made me to better to understand her a little bit more.
I wish she did open about this before,
but I'm not angry about that
because I know that it's really
sensitive conversation for her.
I'm glad that you told me.
I don't want to come between you guys.
If you're saying you are friends, you could be friends.
Just what is missing between us this conversation.
[sniffles]
Just please, when you do things,
just open up your heart and tell me.
I wanted to be someone like that.
You also can trust I can be that person also.
I'm really sorry.
Will you accept my apology?
Yes, I did.
Well, then will you stay the night with me tonight,
so I don't have to be alone?
I'll be with you, I promise you.
Okay, well, don't keep me up all night with your kisses.
-Come near, give me a hug. -Talking to me, let me get my sleep.
Thank you. I won't do anything like that.
[laughs]
Let me get my sleep tonight.
-[Sunny] Let's go. -Let's go get ready for bed.
So I wanted to see her for the first time,
come here, meet her family.
[Matilda]
[Matilda] Hometown. Mm-hmm.
[Matilda] We're here!
-[Matilda laughs] -My, oh my.
Uh-huh.
[Niles] Here we go.
[upbeat music playing]
[Matilda] Today Niles is meeting almost my entire family.
Since my dad is not around anymore,
my uncle's has stepped into a father role of us,
and every big decision from the family goes to them.
They are very, very traditional.
If my family does not think
that Niles is serious about getting married,
they will not accept him to be my husband.
[Niles] There's Hayford.
[Matilda] Mm-hmm.
[Matilda] Thank you.
-[Niles] Oh, I will. -Mm-hmm.
Okay. Oh hey, Hayford!
-[Hayford] Hi. -[Niles] How you doing?
-[Hayford] I'm fine. How are you? -[Niles] I'm doing wonderful.
-[Hayford] They're coming to my house. -[Matilda chuckling]
[Niles] Everybody's here.
[Hayford] Yeah, everybody's here.
[Matilda giggles]
-[Charlotte] Hello! -[Matilda] Hello.
[Niles] Hello.
[Charlotte]
[Niles] At long last I am here.
[laughing]
[Niles speaking in African language]
[Abena speaking in African language]
[Abena laughs]
[Niles] Hi, Mom.
-[Matilda] Enoch. -[Niles] Enoch?
[Niles] Enoch. And, Uncle...? [Kwadwo] Yeah.
-[Kwadwo] How are you? -[Niles] Nice seeing you too.
-[Kwadwo] You are welcome. Sure. -[Niles] You're welcome.
[Charlotte] Oh, welcome to Offinso.
[Niles] This is-- This is the house. Wow.
[laughter]
[Charlotte]
[Charlotte] Oh.
[Niles] Hi, Millicent.
[Niles] And who's the baby?
I sure can.
Okay, take your time. [laughs]
Hold his head, please.
[laughs]
Aren't you the cutest little man?
[Niles] Seeing all these people here, it's overwhelming,
but it also reminds me of when I would go to my grandparent's house
to see all of my family.
It's not a social situation that I've always navigated very well.
But it does make me feel safe in that sense,
there is a-- There is a sense of family here.
It makes me wish that my family had accompanied me
to meet Matilda as well.
Also could have really used them right about here,
considering what I'm about to have to do.
[Niles] It's good to meet everybody.
It's good to take this all in for the first time.
So Matilda and I have been dating for a good long while now,
and I wanted to see her for the first time.
Come here, meet her family, and just get to know her.
You know, I'm thinking about marrying her.
[speaking foreign language]
[Kwaka speaking]
[Kwadwo]
Oh, okay.
[uplifting music playing]
[Kwadwo]
Definitely.
So I was thinking about doing the knocking on this trip.
And very soon...
As in like my very next trip back to Ghana,
I plan to do the wedding ceremony,
like finish the whole entire ceremony.
[menacing music playing]
Eh.
[Charlotte talking in other language]
I don't want to look inwards with you.
-I don't want to look inwards with you. -Please! No. No.
-You start looking inwards. -You know--
Chidi, you're still talking!
You should, you don't listen-- You don't--
I'm [bleep] listening!
[soft music playing]
Mm-hmm.
Hmm.
[melancholy music playing]
[Tigerlily] It's so frustrating.
It's not that I want to fight with Adnan,
but our relationship is so new.
I just can't accept things that I have a problem with.
So I'm not chasing him.
He's gonna have to fix this.
This is not okay.
[sighs deeply]
-Lily. -Yeah?
Come here.
Okay.
I know.
I know that you didn't do it on purpose.
But... then why is it that, in your mind,
you thought it was okay to do,
and then for me, you have, like,
an extreme opposite reaction?
Like, when I asked you how,
you know, you would feel if I did that,
[chuckling nervously] and you said you would kill me.
Like, that's, like, the double standard that I don't like.
-Mmm-hmm. -[Adnan] Uh...
Like what?
No.
-How no? -No.
It's not about religion,
it's about respecting me.
I don't care if it's okay, in your religion,
that you can show your chest and I can't.
Out of respect for me,
you should not.
And you've told me that you, you don't want me to show my body
because my body is just for you,
it's not for everyone else to see.
So, it's the same for me, honey.
Your body is for me,
and I don't want everybody seeing it.
[chuckles softly]
[Tigerlily] We haven't come to an agreement,
and I didn't even bring up all the other issues
that I'm having, like the chiropractor.
But I'm glad that he's apologizing
for the disrespect towards me.
[kisses]
[Tigerlily] I'm going to believe that he means it,
and we're going to move on from here.
But this is something that we need to deal with,
and it's not going to go away.
I am feeling better now.
And that's why I think it's important
that we talk about these things,
and now we can do what we came here to do.
I missed you.
[chuckles] Okay.
[Tigerlily] Mmm-hmm.
-Okay? -Okay.
[Tigerlily chuckles]
Okay, honey.
-I love you so much. -[kisses]
-[Adnan chuckles, speaking] -[chuckling softly]
[Adnan speaking]
I feel the physical chemistry,
and it's actually a little painful to know that you don't.
[Bozo] It feels terrible hurting Vanja.
But I think it's important
for me to be honest from the beginning.
It... Does that mean you don't find me attractive, physically?
Hmm.
[goat bleats]
[woman speaking Twi]
[continuing in Twi]
I don't know what they're talking about,
but I see a few angry faces.
Promises are taken very seriously in this culture.
Her family could not allow me to marry her at all.
[dramatic music playing]
[car horn honking]
[bleats]
[dramatic music playing]
[woman speaking Twi]
[continues in Twi]
[speaking Twi]
[Niles] I'm in a predicament right now.
I told everyone in the... In, in Matilda's family
that I'm not going to be...
getting married on this trip here.
-[man speaking Twi] -Yes.
[woman speaking Twi]
I'm a little frustrated that I don't know what they're talking about,
but I see a few angry faces.
-[inaudible conversation] -They're not happy with what they just heard.
Promises, especially promises to a family,
they're taken very seriously
-in this culture. -[speaking Twi]
If they deny my proposal to postpone the wedding,
her family could, very possibly,
not allow me to marry her at all.
[Kwaka in English]
[exhales in relief]
[Matilda] Two or three months.
Two or... Two or three months? I don't...
There's just... There's just a lot of variables going on right now.
And I don't know if I, if I...
Lord have mercy. Um...
So...
[mouthing indistinctly]
I would have to--
-All right? -If I do the knocking,
the... the timer starts.
Matilda's feeding me everything to say at this moment,
because I just do not want
to say something that's not true,
and end up getting cursed.
Supernaturally cursed, or physically cursed.
Either way, that I, I... We, we don't...
I don't need to bring that, anything to America
that I didn't start off with.
Unless it's Matilda.
[Matilda speaking]
Okay--
Okay. Well, can you... Well, can you present...
Can you please present that
-when I, when I tell them... -Oh,
-okay. -...Okay.
Okay. So...
I, uh... It's, like, I'm going to try and work out some details,
but I... I want to do the knocking on this trip.
Because that's my promise that I will indeed come back,
and... and finish the entire ceremony.
I'm trying to do that as soon as possible.
However, I am going to need some time to do so.
[in Twi]
Say again?
[in Twi]
[man 2 in Twi]
[in Twi]
-[man 1 speaking Twi] -[in Twi]
-[man 2 speaking Twi] -[woman speaking Twi]
[in Twi]
[in English]
[Niles] Okay. [in Twi]
[woman laughs]
[others laugh]
[Niles in Twi]
-[laughter] -[in English]
This row... yeah. This row.
-[speaking indistinctly] -[Niles] Madaase.
-And madaase for you, too. -...[laughing]
-[Niles in Twi] Thank you. -[woman giggles]
[Niles in Twi] Thank you.
[in English] Now this is all over,
A great weight has lifted off of me.
I... I feel a little bit better.
And it started off tense,
but... they, they were understanding.
I'm still wondering how I'm going to gather up enough money
to complete the marriage process.
But I feel a little bit better now that I have a little bit more time to do so.
Gracious Father, we thank thee for what we are about to receive,
for the nourishment in our body.
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
-[woman] Amen. -[other people] Amen.
Amen.
[Matilda narrating]
And, um... I would just like to say,
thank you guys for allowing me to, to eat with you
as a family,
be part of this community.
I am... You have no idea how overjoyed I am
that you guys accepted me so much.
-[Niles in Twi] -[laughter]
[pronounces correctly in Twi]
[Matilda in Twi]
-[Niles] That means, "You're welcome," right? -[Matilda] Yeah.
-[Matilda in Twi] "Thank you all." -"Thank you all."
[Matilda] "Thank you all."
[pronouncing poorly in Twi]
-[others laughing] -[man pronounces correctly in Twi]
[dramatic music playing]
But has there been chemistry so far?
[Vanja] Yeah.
For me, hugging you yesterday was incredible.
Like, I just want to have my hands
all over you, but I don't want to pressure you,
and I don't want you to feel like I'm just being pushy.
The... I... I feel the physical chemistry,
and it's actually a little painful to know that you don't.
[Bozo] It feels terrible for me hurting Vanja.
But I think it's important
for me to be honest in, in this moment from the beginning.
[Vanja] Does that mean, like,
you don't find me attractive, physically? Or--
[sighs]
We were building connection for months.
But, uh, if she gets some impression
that we are, like, like a boyfriend
and a girlfriend, then I feel sorry for that.
For months, it is really beautiful to see her,
to talk to her.
And then, when we met in person,
I cannot explain. I am still...
uh, uh, in awe with her. She's so much dear to me.
But for some reason, I was a little bit overwhelmed with her.
And I just didn't feel the chemistry.
But I hope the feelings will come with time.
[whimpers]
[Bozo speaking] Sorry, sorry.
[sniffles]
It's okay. I just... I, I don't... I don't want to feel, like,
you know, I'm investing all of this,
and you're not investing the same.
[Vanja] I... I don't want to force it,
but I just want to be sure
that I'm not being a fool here,
and just putting myself out there for you to just be, like,
"Oh, I'm parading around Split with my friend," because I don't want that.
Well, "no hard feelings,"
as long as this is going to be progressing
where, where we, where it should go.
-Like, this is a serious relationship. -Uh... Uh, yeah.
[sighs softly]
-No. -[tittering]
I want a hug.
[Vanja] I'm insulted.
You tell me, "Come here.
Let's meet in real life." You tell me you "Love me."
Then in the same breath,
you tell me that you're not romantically attracted to me?
I mean, just...
Uh... Uh, my mind is blown. I don't know.
But, at the same time, he did say that he wants to use the next three weeks
to see where it goes.
So, it does leave me hopeful,
um, that, you know, we could build on this.
Because the last thing I want to do,
is try to force somebody
into a relationship with me.
So, I'm willing to give it time and just be hands-off,
to see where he goes from this point.
[Bozo speaking]
Okay.
[Rayne] Wow.
[Rayne] Okay. Well, then, what do you want now,
from here, from this day forward?
[Rayne] Wow.
-I'm not judging. I'm not-- -Thank you for blaming me. Just don't...
Don't pay no attention to me, because obviously, I'm the issue.
[dramatic music playing]
[Rayne] Okay? You need help.
[yelling] I don't... I don't want to look inwards
-with you! I don't want-- -There are some things... No.
-...to look inwards with you! -No.
You start looking inwards!
[Rayne] I came out here today
to see if Chidi might want to reconcile.
But right now, he is definitely crossing the line.
I'm surprised that he's trying
to blame me about my past relationships not working out.
He knows guys have always treated me like dirt.
Like, how dare you, after all these years, throw it back in my face?
What do you want with me? If I'm such an issue...
What do you want?
Yeah, that's all you freaking want.
That's why you want to marry me.
That's why you're that obsessed with me.
You're so scared to come near me.
[yelling] And you want to call that "Love"?
Bull-[bleep]! You're the one wanting the visa!
You're the one wanting this and that, okay?
[angrily] I'm not... What do you think?
So, stop using it.
I don't need it from you, please.
[Chidi] All right. Um...
Let me tell you something.
The issue I've had, is that...
Oh, my God. Dude, that's what we're doing. That's what we're doing.
I just want an earnest and honest discussion with you,
-even if-- -Okay, you're still talking!
Say what you're gonna say so that we can clear it up!
What's wrong with you?
"You should..." [grunts] [mockingly] "You don't listen! You don't..."
I'm [bleep] listening!
I don't know if you are getting me. [stammers]
[Rayne] Okay. Well, then, what do you want now,
from here, from this day forward?
If I'm a little too much for Chidi,
I will withdraw myself out of your life.
I... I have no issue with that.
I wish you the best, and I will always wish the best for you.
Whatever helps you feel like a man.
I need some space right now.
[Chidi] I understand. Um...
[Rayne] I guess you can go.
This is the worst heartbreak I've ever had in my entire existence.
Yep... [sniffles]
Devastated, pissed, sad.
Like, how could someone be so hurtful?
[crying softly]
It's heartbreaking to see someone that stood for you
so strong, tear you down to the degree that he did.
It's over forever.
[sniffling]
[cries softly]
[Ingrid speaking]
[Brian speaking]
[Niles narrating] Still to come, on Before the 90 Days...
-[goats bleating] -[Matilda yelling in Twi]
-[yelling in Twi poorly] -[laughing]
-It's cute? -[Adnan] Yeah.
[annoyed] We're not going diving, honey.
[speaking in other language]
[shouting in English] Who's ready?
[all cheering]
-[woman 1] Joe! -[woman 2] There you go.
-[woman] You must be hungry. -Thank you!
[Joe] My family viewed me
as someone who doesn't take life too seriously.
Let's go!
But even though we've only been speaking for five months,
my girlfriend, Magda,
has been extremely direct with her [chuckling nervously] intentions.
-[woman 1] Oh, God. -[woman 2] The question is,
does she want to move here just to move here,
or does she wanna move here for you?
In the Philippines, there is no same-sex marriage,
but I could marry someone else here and get citizenship.
What if I just marry your mom?
[in English]
Yeah.
[Niles speaking nervously]
[Niles] Mr. Arc is an elder
within Matilda's community.
We need to get his blessing
in order to do the knocking ceremony.
[Niles] But the thing is, I'm not ready to get married yet.
I will have to come back
-on the next trip. -No, no, no, no, no, no.
Yeah, but it was, like, meaningless.
It's just, like, so many problems.
I shouldn't have to protect myself
from my husband.
You shouldn't have to protect yourself,
but you need to.
[knuckles cracking]
[man speaking]
[Sunny, nervously] Yeah.
We just want, like, a successful relationship.
Mmm-mmm.
[Veah] He has to choose between me or you?
Yes, of course.
-[indistinct chatting] -[Vanja speaking]
-Yeah. -[Vanja speaking]
[Bozo speaking]
-[Vanja] Oh, my God. -[Bozo speaking]
[angrily] Just don't talk to me.
[Vanja] No! Just... Just don't talk to me, Bozo.
[crying softly]
[whimpers softly]