1
00:00:19,999 --> 00:00:21,542
["Front" by Vex Ruffin playing]
2
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You think he's gonna propose?
Ugh, what a bummer.
3
00:00:31,010 --> 00:00:33,012
Okay, yeah. I'll talk to you later.
4
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[Nadia] Hey.
5
00:00:38,684 --> 00:00:40,561
Welcome to yesterday.
6
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I'm so glad you made it.
And look at that, great posture.
7
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-[Alan] Thank you.
-Yeah.
8
00:00:46,901 --> 00:00:48,861
Not a lot of people at this party
can say that.
9
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-Come on, I'll show you around.
-It's a cool place.
10
00:00:58,913 --> 00:01:01,999
♪ I've got the strength
But you feel it, oh ♪
11
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Why do you think this is happening to us?
12
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I'm-- I'm pretty sure
that it's purgatorial punishment
13
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for being a bad person.
14
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What is this bad person?
15
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I mean, you know, there's Hitler
and then there's, uh, everybody else.
16
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Even Wile E. Coyote.
17
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Yeah, he's out there.
He's looking for a hot meal.
18
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-Are you having a stroke?
-No. Uh...
19
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That guy that Beatrice
cheated on me with, he's here.
20
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-Don't look.
-[Nadia] Just take it easy, all right?
21
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Point him out later,
and I'll bust his fucking knee caps, okay?
22
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But for now, you and me got bigger fish
to fry. Life and death stuff, huh.
23
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-[Alan] Geez.
-[Nadia] Eh.
24
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[Alan] What is that?
25
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My new theory is that it's
an incredibly dense gravitational field
26
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that's gaining consciousness
and is now deliberately fucking with us.
27
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Kind of the black hole meets
They Shoot Horses, Don't They?
28
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Yeah, my bathroom
doesn't have a black hole, so...
29
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This isn't gonna be very fun
if you keep rejecting my theories.
30
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You rejected mine.
31
00:02:03,060 --> 00:02:05,688
Yeah, because it was
morally simplistic and narcissistic.
32
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I mean, the universe is moral,
but it shares your views on morality.
33
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We'll try your way.
34
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[indistinct chatter]
35
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Oh, great.
36
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-What were you doing in there?
-Who is this guy?
37
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Uh, have I ever done anything, you know,
memorably bad to either of you?
38
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Yeah, you said I shouldn't adopt
those two Neapolitan mastiff puppies
39
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'cause I have a small space,
40
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but they needed a home
and I could've made some changes.
41
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Okay. Do you want to get in on this?
42
00:02:33,841 --> 00:02:37,720
Oh, no, no. I love that you're a cunt.
It makes me feel morally superior.
43
00:02:37,803 --> 00:02:39,972
Okay, that's a good way
to not judge people.
44
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Is there anything else?
45
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-Yeah.
-Who?
46
00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:43,475
-Gina.
-Okay.
47
00:02:43,559 --> 00:02:46,812
When you said Gina wasn't really my type,
I really took that to heart.
48
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I mean, if it weren't for you,
I'd be married. I'd be living upstate.
49
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I'd be raising two mastiffs.
I'd have a completely different life.
50
00:02:52,943 --> 00:02:55,821
-Shall we open it up to the group?
-Yeah, that's a great idea.
51
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Okay, okay. No problem.
52
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Ding dong.
53
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[Nadia] Gather 'round, gather 'round.
54
00:03:03,370 --> 00:03:07,249
Great to see you and you and also you.
Okay, so hi.
55
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Me from the party.
56
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I just want to say...
57
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thank you all so much
for coming to celebrate tonight.
58
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What good people. Uh...
59
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It means a lot to me,
60
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and something else
that also means a lot to me
61
00:03:21,472 --> 00:03:25,893
would be if you would tell me
if you think I'm a bad person,
62
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or maybe I've committed
some serious misdeeds,
63
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and you could come
and talk to me about that tonight
64
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would be super fucking hot. Okay?
65
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For my birthday,
tell me if I'm a bad person.
66
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Okay, cool.
67
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-Uh, thank you so much, Nadia.
-Thank you.
68
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I would like to dedicate this night
to Chong, my uncle,
69
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who also had a hard time saying thank you.
70
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-[glass clink]
-[cheering]
71
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[Maxine] To Chong.
72
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-Love you, Chung.
-Chong.
73
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-Chong.
-Chong. Chong.
74
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This is why she's acting like this.
75
00:04:03,097 --> 00:04:03,931
Okay, check it out.
76
00:04:04,014 --> 00:04:06,517
I gave everybody here an opportunity
to tell me I'm a bad person.
77
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Nobody did it because I fucking rule,
so... there goes your theory.
78
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-[John] Hey.
-[Nadia] Hey.
79
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It's been a while.
80
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Yeah, I guess for you it has, huh?
81
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[John] You look-- You look real fantastic.
82
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Well, I wear the same thing all the time.
83
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Hey, man.
84
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-Hey.
-I'm John.
85
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Oh, this is Alan.
86
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He's basically a child that the universe
has tasked me with babysitting.
87
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-Would you say that's a fair assessment?
-Sure.
88
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Uh...
89
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Speaking of kids, how's Lucy?
90
00:04:32,501 --> 00:04:34,920
She's doing great.
She just won the Gwendolyn Brooks prize
91
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for her poem on the Statue of Liberty.
92
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That is great. Lucy is great.
93
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John and I were a thing for a year.
94
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How do you know she's great?
You never met her.
95
00:04:43,887 --> 00:04:46,098
I mean, you were supposed to meet her,
but you backed out.
96
00:04:46,181 --> 00:04:47,308
She backed out, new guy.
97
00:04:47,391 --> 00:04:49,518
I had every intention
of meeting her, all right?
98
00:04:49,601 --> 00:04:52,396
I just, uh... overslept.
99
00:04:52,479 --> 00:04:56,358
I even had a book I was gonna give her.
Emily of New Moon.
100
00:04:56,442 --> 00:04:57,443
I love that book.
101
00:04:57,526 --> 00:04:59,069
Why'd you even bring her up though?
102
00:04:59,153 --> 00:05:01,363
You're supposed to ask people
about their kids. Okay?
103
00:05:01,447 --> 00:05:04,616
It's polite. It gives everybody a moment
to pretend there's gonna be a future.
104
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-I'm gonna get a seltzer.
-Okay.
105
00:05:06,577 --> 00:05:08,662
Oh, hey, they have alcohol
over there too, so...
106
00:05:08,746 --> 00:05:10,164
No, no, no, no, no. That's his deal.
107
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He's like sober, white-knuckling it
so he doesn't drink.
108
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That's why he's such an asshole.
109
00:05:14,168 --> 00:05:16,545
Oh, I thought it was
because you were pissing him off.
110
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Alan, sexualizing self-hatred
is the hallmark of any relationship
111
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that begins with extra-marital infidelity.
112
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You skipped out on meeting his daughter
and you broke up his marriage?
113
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With the amount of guilt,
I'm surprised you're not a Jew.
114
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Thanks, man.
115
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[sniffs]
116
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-What?
-Let's do it.
117
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Let's meet Lucy.
118
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I wanted you to meet her
when we were together.
119
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Please?
[John] Okay.
120
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I have breakfast with her
every Monday and Friday.
121
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Tomorrow morning then.
122
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Thank you.
123
00:06:08,347 --> 00:06:10,766
[Maxine] I think there's
a lot of merit in copying.
124
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I'm interested
in plagiarism as an art form.
125
00:06:13,394 --> 00:06:15,187
But haven't you wondered why visual art
126
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no longer carries
the weight it did 30 years ago?
127
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-I've literally never wondered that.
-The internet.
128
00:06:21,652 --> 00:06:22,736
AIDS.
129
00:06:24,071 --> 00:06:28,784
The AIDS crisis, it wiped out nearly every
meaningful critical voice in every medium.
130
00:06:28,867 --> 00:06:35,416
So now, the artist's intention
is buried in a sea of likes and thumbs up.
131
00:06:35,499 --> 00:06:37,376
But if the intention's still there...
132
00:06:37,459 --> 00:06:39,711
If it's clear, it doesn't matter
what the critic thinks.
133
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What are you, a collector?
134
00:06:41,255 --> 00:06:42,756
I don't really understand art.
135
00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:45,801
My dad used to say that I don't have
a single creative bone in my body.
136
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So we're talking about your dad now.
137
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I'm really into dads.
138
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-I'm a dad.
-[Maxine] Ah.
139
00:06:52,766 --> 00:06:54,935
-You want a refill?
-Yes, Dad.
140
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You keep that, I'll get another one.
141
00:07:03,068 --> 00:07:04,695
I'm not really good at this stuff.
142
00:07:04,778 --> 00:07:06,947
You seem to be
so comfortable with yourself.
143
00:07:07,030 --> 00:07:08,240
Bringing up AIDS at a party.
144
00:07:08,323 --> 00:07:10,451
-I'd never have the balls to do that.
-[liquid pours]
145
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Is that what she likes about you?
146
00:07:13,954 --> 00:07:14,997
I'll tell you what.
147
00:07:16,039 --> 00:07:18,417
If you would politely excuse yourself...
148
00:07:19,168 --> 00:07:20,669
I might be able to find out.
149
00:07:22,171 --> 00:07:23,130
Thank you.
150
00:07:23,213 --> 00:07:24,798
["Diamond Veins" playing]
151
00:07:41,732 --> 00:07:43,442
[Nadia] Pancake breakfasts...
152
00:07:43,525 --> 00:07:44,818
private cars...
153
00:07:45,194 --> 00:07:49,698
You know, all my mother gave me
was a subway token and an eating disorder.
154
00:07:50,657 --> 00:07:51,742
You're a good dad.
155
00:07:52,534 --> 00:07:53,785
She's gonna be great.
156
00:07:54,286 --> 00:07:56,246
But, you know, it's a tricky age.
157
00:07:57,122 --> 00:07:58,540
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
158
00:07:59,041 --> 00:08:02,002
I was right about that age
when life stopped making sense.
159
00:08:02,085 --> 00:08:05,547
Hey, all I wanted to do was be left alone,
hole up with books all day.
160
00:08:06,006 --> 00:08:06,924
Man, you know what?
161
00:08:07,007 --> 00:08:09,176
I still got Emily of New Moon
at Ruth's house.
162
00:08:09,259 --> 00:08:12,387
I think I should just go grab it
and give it to her. Ah?
163
00:08:12,471 --> 00:08:14,765
It's late. How about we give it to her
another time?
164
00:08:14,848 --> 00:08:16,600
Come on, man. I'd like to do it tonight.
165
00:08:16,683 --> 00:08:18,185
[classical music playing]
166
00:08:31,490 --> 00:08:34,576
She's just fucking everybody,
and I'm watching like an idiot.
167
00:08:35,661 --> 00:08:36,745
[glass shatters]
168
00:08:42,501 --> 00:08:44,419
-[cell phone thuds]
-[John groans]
169
00:08:45,128 --> 00:08:46,004
[Nadia] Sorry.
170
00:08:47,089 --> 00:08:48,173
What time is it?
171
00:08:48,257 --> 00:08:49,550
[Nadia] Uh, 6:00 a.m.
172
00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:51,385
Oh, my gosh.
173
00:08:51,468 --> 00:08:54,179
I'm gonna go to Ruth's
and get that book for Lucy, okay?
174
00:08:54,263 --> 00:08:56,473
-I'll see you at breakfast.
-Okay, babe.
175
00:08:57,224 --> 00:08:58,267
[John groans]
176
00:08:58,850 --> 00:08:59,685
You okay?
177
00:08:59,768 --> 00:09:01,979
My bones hurt every morning.
178
00:09:02,521 --> 00:09:04,606
You should get checked for Lyme disease.
179
00:09:45,564 --> 00:09:46,732
[Ruth coughs]
180
00:09:47,107 --> 00:09:48,150
[Ruth] Damn it.
181
00:09:48,609 --> 00:09:49,943
[coughing]
182
00:09:50,027 --> 00:09:50,944
God.
183
00:09:51,945 --> 00:09:52,988
[Ruth sighs]
184
00:09:53,447 --> 00:09:54,281
[flies buzzing]
185
00:09:54,364 --> 00:09:56,742
-[Nadia] Hey, did you find it?
-[Ruth] Yes.
Way in the back of the armoire.
186
00:10:00,829 --> 00:10:01,663
[Nadia] Ooh.
187
00:10:01,747 --> 00:10:03,707
Ah, thank you.
188
00:10:03,790 --> 00:10:04,958
[Ruth] Okay.
189
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:07,711
You know I keep all your stuff.
190
00:10:07,794 --> 00:10:11,882
I even have the Valentine's Day card
you made me in fourth grade.
191
00:10:11,965 --> 00:10:15,302
I mean, your mother
was a little unstable around that time,
192
00:10:15,385 --> 00:10:17,554
and oh, I told her, I told her,
193
00:10:17,638 --> 00:10:20,807
I'm not trying to replace anyone.
194
00:10:20,891 --> 00:10:22,851
I'm just trying to be here
195
00:10:22,934 --> 00:10:25,896
for a little girl
who could use a little help.
196
00:10:27,064 --> 00:10:30,025
[exhales] It was the decent thing to do.
197
00:10:30,108 --> 00:10:30,942
Sure.
198
00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,695
Oh, oh, oh.
Did you lock the door behind you?
199
00:10:33,779 --> 00:10:34,738
[Nadia] Yes, I did.
200
00:10:36,490 --> 00:10:39,701
Hey, Ruth, if you were gonna die today,
201
00:10:39,785 --> 00:10:42,037
would you be ready for it?
202
00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:45,374
Like would you feel at peace
with your life?
203
00:10:45,457 --> 00:10:46,416
Yes and no.
204
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,670
So, how do you get to just yes?
205
00:10:50,170 --> 00:10:51,129
[Ruth] You don't.
206
00:10:51,505 --> 00:10:55,884
See, holding two incompatible ideas
in your head at the same time
207
00:10:55,967 --> 00:10:59,012
and accepting both of them...
208
00:10:59,096 --> 00:11:01,139
that's the best of being human.
209
00:11:02,724 --> 00:11:06,353
Yes, no, good, bad, life, death.
210
00:11:06,436 --> 00:11:08,605
Wax on, wax off.
211
00:11:08,689 --> 00:11:10,691
Tomato, tomato.
212
00:11:10,774 --> 00:11:12,526
-Potato, two potatoes.
-Okay.
213
00:11:12,609 --> 00:11:14,569
-All night, all day.
-Okay, okay, okay.
214
00:11:14,653 --> 00:11:15,904
-Okay, okay.
-Right?
215
00:11:15,987 --> 00:11:17,239
-Okay, okay.
-Come on.
216
00:11:17,322 --> 00:11:19,157
Look. Right now,
217
00:11:19,241 --> 00:11:22,327
I'm looking at you as you are today
218
00:11:22,411 --> 00:11:26,873
while also looking at you
as that peculiar little girl I knew.
219
00:11:26,957 --> 00:11:28,208
[Ruth inhales]
220
00:11:28,291 --> 00:11:29,334
[Ruth sighs]
221
00:11:29,418 --> 00:11:31,420
[deep voice] Happy Valentine's Day.
222
00:11:31,503 --> 00:11:33,422
Oh! There it is.
223
00:11:33,505 --> 00:11:34,464
Well...
224
00:11:35,298 --> 00:11:36,675
I may not be a mom,
225
00:11:36,758 --> 00:11:39,845
but, hey, damn, I got this.
226
00:11:39,928 --> 00:11:41,179
-[Nadia] Mm-hmm.
-[Ruth] Uh-huh.
227
00:11:41,263 --> 00:11:43,640
Look, she's smoking, like you. Get it?
228
00:11:43,724 --> 00:11:46,184
And St. Valentine was a big smoker.
Everybody knows that.
229
00:11:46,268 --> 00:11:47,352
Oh, yeah.
230
00:11:48,687 --> 00:11:50,188
Fucking bingo.
231
00:11:52,899 --> 00:11:53,734
It's here.
232
00:11:53,817 --> 00:11:57,195
You know, that was written by the same
woman that wrote Anne of Green Gables.
233
00:11:57,279 --> 00:11:58,238
[Nadia] Yeah, of course.
234
00:11:58,321 --> 00:12:00,657
Everybody loves Anne,
235
00:12:00,741 --> 00:12:03,452
but I like Emily.
236
00:12:03,535 --> 00:12:04,453
She's dark.
237
00:12:05,746 --> 00:12:08,415
-You lock the door behind you?
-Yes.
238
00:12:08,498 --> 00:12:10,459
You already asked me that, Ruthie.
239
00:12:10,542 --> 00:12:13,211
Oh, I know. My memory's slipping.
240
00:12:13,295 --> 00:12:17,174
There's-- There's somebody
in the neighborhood.
241
00:12:17,924 --> 00:12:20,802
I am making you tea.
242
00:12:20,886 --> 00:12:23,430
But, personally,
I wouldn't touch the stuff.
243
00:12:23,513 --> 00:12:25,265
[Nadia] "She despised Rhoda...
244
00:12:25,682 --> 00:12:28,059
more than ever
for trying to get back with her."
245
00:12:28,643 --> 00:12:31,271
You know, Rhoda was the cunt
in this story, obviously.
246
00:12:31,354 --> 00:12:32,522
Here we are.
247
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:38,195
[knock at door]
248
00:12:40,238 --> 00:12:41,740
[sighs]
249
00:12:41,823 --> 00:12:43,742
Fucking God damn it, man.
250
00:12:45,660 --> 00:12:46,661
[sighs]
251
00:12:47,204 --> 00:12:48,705
[knocking on door]
252
00:12:49,206 --> 00:12:50,874
[knocking continues rapidly]
253
00:12:51,374 --> 00:12:52,209
[sighs]
254
00:12:52,918 --> 00:12:54,211
[dance music playing]
255
00:12:56,671 --> 00:12:58,465
-Gas explosion.
-[Alan] Bike accident.
256
00:12:58,548 --> 00:13:00,425
Listen, I know you think
I'm a moral narcissist,
257
00:13:00,509 --> 00:13:02,427
but there are good guys and bad guys.
258
00:13:02,511 --> 00:13:04,387
And I am definitely a good guy.
259
00:13:04,971 --> 00:13:07,015
And that piece of shit, he...
260
00:13:07,974 --> 00:13:09,309
he is a bad guy.
261
00:13:09,392 --> 00:13:12,979
Okay, so then why are you
the one in purgatory?
262
00:13:14,272 --> 00:13:16,483
Hey, happy birthday.
263
00:13:16,566 --> 00:13:17,651
John.
264
00:13:18,151 --> 00:13:19,569
Quelle surprise.
265
00:13:19,653 --> 00:13:21,822
So, listen. Uh, remember
when I stood up Lucy
266
00:13:21,905 --> 00:13:23,782
and you've been secretly
resenting me ever since?
267
00:13:23,865 --> 00:13:25,992
Let's take her to breakfast
tomorrow morning,
268
00:13:26,076 --> 00:13:28,411
make everything kosher copacetic, okay?
269
00:13:28,495 --> 00:13:31,331
We can go to my place.
270
00:13:32,123 --> 00:13:33,834
Let's take the fire escape.
271
00:13:35,544 --> 00:13:36,378
It'll be fun.
272
00:13:36,461 --> 00:13:38,338
[gasps] What's that?
273
00:13:38,421 --> 00:13:39,756
-Come on.
-Whoa.
274
00:13:40,841 --> 00:13:43,051
[Mike] You gotta stop getting
so worked up over him.
275
00:13:43,134 --> 00:13:45,345
You've spent enough time
on this guy already.
276
00:13:45,929 --> 00:13:47,722
I know it's a bummer, but come on.
277
00:13:47,806 --> 00:13:48,807
Oh, yeah.
278
00:13:49,850 --> 00:13:50,934
Yeah, it is a bummer.
279
00:13:51,017 --> 00:13:52,811
It is a bummer for everybody involved,
280
00:13:52,894 --> 00:13:54,271
except, it seems, to be for you,
281
00:13:54,354 --> 00:13:56,022
which, you know, doesn't make any sense,
282
00:13:56,106 --> 00:13:59,109
because if anybody deserves to be punished
283
00:13:59,192 --> 00:14:01,361
for the rest of their fucking life,
it is you.
284
00:14:01,444 --> 00:14:03,154
You are fucking garbage,
285
00:14:03,238 --> 00:14:05,031
and someone needs to bag you up,
286
00:14:05,115 --> 00:14:07,576
take you outside,
throw you into the East River,
287
00:14:07,659 --> 00:14:10,453
and put everyone
who can smell your fucking stench
288
00:14:10,537 --> 00:14:12,330
out of their goddamn misery!
289
00:14:12,414 --> 00:14:13,248
God!
290
00:14:13,331 --> 00:14:14,791
Hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey!
291
00:14:14,875 --> 00:14:16,877
-Yeah!
-Hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey!
292
00:14:17,377 --> 00:14:20,213
I don't know who the fuck you are,
I don't know what's going on here,
293
00:14:20,297 --> 00:14:23,258
but either you two suck each other's dicks
or get out of my apartment.
294
00:14:24,217 --> 00:14:25,844
Okay? Come on.
I'm not sucking anybody's dick.
295
00:14:31,975 --> 00:14:33,685
Bea, he's a sex addict.
296
00:14:33,768 --> 00:14:36,563
-[Beatrice] Who?
-Michael. Mike. Your Mike. Your Michael.
297
00:14:36,646 --> 00:14:40,233
Alan, you're so fucking drunk right now.
I'm not gonna do this with you.
298
00:14:40,317 --> 00:14:43,111
-I am not, okay?
-[Alan] Bea, he's a sex addict.
299
00:14:43,194 --> 00:14:45,780
Don't bother calling me back,
'cause you're not gonna be sober.
300
00:14:45,864 --> 00:14:47,157
-You need help.
-Please, Bea.
301
00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:48,825
-[honking]
-[tires screech]
302
00:14:48,909 --> 00:14:50,118
-[crash]
-[water running]
303
00:14:56,917 --> 00:14:58,084
[water running]
304
00:15:02,339 --> 00:15:04,341
-Gas explosion again.
-Again?
305
00:15:05,091 --> 00:15:06,134
I get hit by a car.
306
00:15:06,217 --> 00:15:07,427
[Nadia] Oh, classic.
307
00:15:07,510 --> 00:15:08,470
Hey, wait a second.
308
00:15:08,553 --> 00:15:11,181
Are you telling me
that you're never dying on the stairs?
309
00:15:11,264 --> 00:15:12,515
No.
310
00:15:12,599 --> 00:15:15,560
Are you some kind
of a fucking superhero or just a...
311
00:15:15,644 --> 00:15:17,604
Do you think that we're dying
at the same time?
312
00:15:17,687 --> 00:15:19,689
Hey, happy birthday.
313
00:15:20,815 --> 00:15:21,650
Give me one second.
314
00:15:23,234 --> 00:15:24,444
[snoring]
315
00:15:25,153 --> 00:15:26,947
[horns honking in the distance]
316
00:15:34,913 --> 00:15:38,124
-Up with Susan?
-Yeah, 'cause she was like doing that.
317
00:15:38,208 --> 00:15:41,002
-What?
-She was choking her during sex.
318
00:15:41,086 --> 00:15:41,920
Oh!
319
00:15:42,003 --> 00:15:44,047
Yeah, she's a choker and shit.
320
00:15:44,130 --> 00:15:45,006
Yeah.
321
00:15:45,674 --> 00:15:46,675
It's kind of hot.
322
00:15:46,758 --> 00:15:49,302
I mean, it is kind of hot,
but then the stalking started.
323
00:15:49,386 --> 00:15:50,971
-That's not hot.
-Yeah.
324
00:15:53,264 --> 00:15:56,267
This guy's been following us
for like five blocks.
325
00:15:58,269 --> 00:16:00,522
What the hell are you even--
326
00:16:00,605 --> 00:16:02,232
Back the fuck up, motherfucker!
327
00:16:02,315 --> 00:16:06,987
I said back the fuck up, motherfucker!
Back the fuck up, motherfucker! Back up!
328
00:16:07,070 --> 00:16:08,697
Let's go! Let's go!
329
00:16:16,413 --> 00:16:17,831
[keys jangling]
330
00:16:19,499 --> 00:16:21,376
Three-one-one, you guys rock.
331
00:16:21,459 --> 00:16:24,337
Listen, uh, I'd like to report a gas leak.
332
00:16:25,755 --> 00:16:26,589
Yeah.
333
00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:28,299
Yes, it is urgent.
334
00:16:28,717 --> 00:16:29,551
Uh-huh.
335
00:16:29,634 --> 00:16:32,303
You know, it's a big-time
fucking emergency, actually.
336
00:16:42,981 --> 00:16:44,065
[gunshot]
337
00:16:51,448 --> 00:16:52,699
[shaky breathing]
338
00:16:54,701 --> 00:16:55,702
[Ruth] Nadia!
339
00:16:56,745 --> 00:16:58,872
Oh, God. Look at me. Look at--
340
00:16:58,955 --> 00:17:01,166
Oh! Nadia, no! Honey, please!
341
00:17:01,249 --> 00:17:03,793
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
342
00:17:03,877 --> 00:17:05,420
I thought it was a burglar.
343
00:17:05,503 --> 00:17:08,965
They've been saying
there's somebody in the neighborhood.
344
00:17:09,049 --> 00:17:10,925
[speaking indistinctly]
345
00:17:14,554 --> 00:17:15,388
[knock at door]
346
00:17:17,515 --> 00:17:18,516
[Nadia] Fuck.
347
00:17:20,810 --> 00:17:22,103
Oh, fuck.
348
00:17:23,605 --> 00:17:24,481
[exhales]
349
00:17:25,982 --> 00:17:27,192
[exhales] Fuck.
350
00:17:33,031 --> 00:17:34,574
[exhales]
351
00:17:44,125 --> 00:17:45,460
[dance music playing]
352
00:17:47,962 --> 00:17:50,548
[Mike chuckles]
353
00:17:50,632 --> 00:17:52,467
[Mike] You think he's gonna propose?
354
00:17:53,134 --> 00:17:54,260
That's a bummer.
355
00:17:56,805 --> 00:17:57,639
Yeah.
356
00:17:59,265 --> 00:18:00,391
That's right.
357
00:18:00,475 --> 00:18:01,976
Hi. I'm Alan.
358
00:18:03,478 --> 00:18:05,980
-Yeah, I'm on the phone.
-Yeah, with my girlfriend.
359
00:18:06,564 --> 00:18:07,440
Beatrice.
360
00:18:08,316 --> 00:18:11,319
Bea, uh...
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna call you back.
361
00:18:13,071 --> 00:18:14,781
-Listen.
-Why you?
362
00:18:15,448 --> 00:18:16,658
Why me what?
363
00:18:16,741 --> 00:18:17,575
Bea.
364
00:18:18,034 --> 00:18:21,121
She chose you, and you don't love her.
You're not faithful.
365
00:18:21,788 --> 00:18:22,997
You never get punished.
366
00:18:23,373 --> 00:18:24,290
So why you?
367
00:18:25,750 --> 00:18:27,752
She didn't choose me, Alan.
368
00:18:29,087 --> 00:18:31,881
The only choice she made was not you.
369
00:18:32,799 --> 00:18:34,342
Nobody chooses me.
370
00:18:36,469 --> 00:18:38,388
I'm the hole where a choice should be.
371
00:18:43,768 --> 00:18:45,228
Oh, God. Alan.
372
00:18:45,311 --> 00:18:47,105
I had a mace-induced asthma attack. You?
373
00:18:47,188 --> 00:18:50,108
What if they keep going?
374
00:18:50,525 --> 00:18:53,027
-Who? Who keeps going?
-Them.
375
00:18:53,570 --> 00:18:55,488
I mean, everyone who's not us.
376
00:18:55,572 --> 00:18:58,199
All right, I thought
that what was happening to us
377
00:18:58,283 --> 00:19:00,034
wasn't hurting anybody else, but...
378
00:19:00,577 --> 00:19:03,288
[chuckles]
...I mean, they're all in it, too.
379
00:19:03,371 --> 00:19:04,330
What?
380
00:19:04,414 --> 00:19:07,417
Fifteen times, Ruth has grieved for me.
381
00:19:07,500 --> 00:19:11,629
In 15 universes, she's alone.
382
00:19:11,713 --> 00:19:14,424
Wait. It's 15 for you, too? Did you count?
383
00:19:14,507 --> 00:19:16,176
I know how to count, Alan.
384
00:19:16,676 --> 00:19:18,428
Hey, happy birthday.
385
00:19:18,511 --> 00:19:20,597
Hey. Okay, listen to me.
386
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:24,517
We are leaving,
and I am not going to get the book.
387
00:19:24,601 --> 00:19:28,646
I'm going to tell your daughter
about Emily of New Moon.
388
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:30,607
-Understand?
-Yeah.
389
00:19:30,690 --> 00:19:32,025
-Can you help me with this?
-Sure.
390
00:19:32,108 --> 00:19:33,484
Sorry, I gotta make a call.
391
00:19:34,861 --> 00:19:36,571
[woman laughs]
392
00:19:36,654 --> 00:19:39,240
-What the fuck?
-Oh, my God.
393
00:19:41,201 --> 00:19:42,577
You want me to feel guilty?
394
00:19:43,161 --> 00:19:44,078
Well, I don't.
395
00:19:44,495 --> 00:19:47,248
I am not Beatrice's boyfriend.
That was your job.
396
00:19:47,332 --> 00:19:49,626
Look, I know it's not up to me
to punish you.
397
00:19:50,126 --> 00:19:52,045
But I don't have to make this
easy for you.
398
00:19:52,128 --> 00:19:54,088
Who is Beatrice?
You know what? I don't care.
399
00:19:54,172 --> 00:19:57,592
Listen, I have an early flight
to Sweden in the morning,
400
00:19:57,675 --> 00:19:59,802
so you need to get out
so I can get it in.
401
00:20:01,054 --> 00:20:01,930
Whatever.
402
00:20:03,306 --> 00:20:05,475
If it wasn't you,
it would be some other woman.
403
00:20:05,558 --> 00:20:07,018
Do I look like I care?
404
00:20:07,101 --> 00:20:09,771
-I-- I wasn't trying to insult you, ma'am.
-Fuck you.
405
00:20:11,231 --> 00:20:12,232
[sighs]
406
00:20:14,067 --> 00:20:16,319
She told me all about you, you know?
407
00:20:16,861 --> 00:20:20,698
That you have mental problems,
that you're sick and you won't get help,
408
00:20:20,782 --> 00:20:22,200
and she couldn't break up with you
409
00:20:22,283 --> 00:20:24,285
because she was afraid
you would do something.
410
00:20:24,369 --> 00:20:25,995
She calls you the gingerbread man.
411
00:20:27,038 --> 00:20:28,915
She can call me whatever she wants.
412
00:20:33,086 --> 00:20:34,087
[sighs]
413
00:21:02,490 --> 00:21:03,741
I'll be right back, okay?
414
00:21:10,331 --> 00:21:11,249
[John] There she is.
415
00:21:12,125 --> 00:21:13,042
[Nadia] John, man.
416
00:21:19,966 --> 00:21:21,551
This kid just gave me the finger.
417
00:21:21,634 --> 00:21:22,760
[John laughs]
418
00:21:22,844 --> 00:21:24,053
She's perfect.
419
00:21:25,179 --> 00:21:27,223
Luce, say hi.
420
00:21:28,766 --> 00:21:30,351
Say hi, baby. Say hi.
421
00:21:30,893 --> 00:21:32,103
Pancake time.
422
00:21:32,562 --> 00:21:33,813
Okay, John.
423
00:21:35,315 --> 00:21:37,025
-Be careful.
-With what?
424
00:21:39,485 --> 00:21:40,403
What's wrong?
425
00:21:42,155 --> 00:21:43,740
I'm sorry, I can't do this.
426
00:21:44,324 --> 00:21:45,908
-Do what?
-I can't meet her.
427
00:21:45,992 --> 00:21:47,327
I could die in front of her, John.
428
00:21:47,410 --> 00:21:48,244
-Die?
-Yes.
429
00:21:48,328 --> 00:21:50,747
-What are you gonna die from?
-I don't know. The grate.
430
00:21:50,830 --> 00:21:54,542
A car could run me over.
I mean, best case scenario, I...
431
00:21:55,460 --> 00:21:57,086
[sighs] ...disappear.
432
00:21:58,129 --> 00:22:00,673
Don't do this.
Okay, please, I'm begging you.
433
00:22:00,757 --> 00:22:01,716
Don't do this to her.
434
00:22:01,799 --> 00:22:04,093
I can't have people
coming in and out of her life like this.
435
00:22:04,177 --> 00:22:06,971
Exactly, all right? I'm not rejecting her.
I'm protecting her.
436
00:22:07,055 --> 00:22:10,141
[John] Don't do this to her, please. Okay?
Don't do it to me.
437
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:13,061
I'm begging you. I love you.
Please don't do this.
438
00:22:14,270 --> 00:22:15,897
Just come and say hi. Just say hi.
439
00:22:15,980 --> 00:22:18,649
I wish I could. I really do.
440
00:22:18,733 --> 00:22:20,485
I wish I could, okay?
441
00:22:20,568 --> 00:22:22,862
Sorry. I'm sorry about everything.
442
00:22:22,945 --> 00:22:24,781
All right? I got to go. I got to go.
[Maxine] Is cyanide sweet, though?
443
00:22:35,166 --> 00:22:37,627
Is that why Jim Jones
put it in the Kool-Aid?
444
00:22:37,710 --> 00:22:39,545
So the kids can't taste it?
445
00:22:39,629 --> 00:22:41,422
[Lizzy] Jonestown was bonkers.
446
00:22:41,506 --> 00:22:43,925
[Lizzy and Maxine speaking indistinctly]
447
00:22:47,970 --> 00:22:49,555
-[Lizzy] Right?
-[Maxine] Yeah.
448
00:22:49,639 --> 00:22:51,682
[Lizzy] But it's huge. I don't know.
449
00:22:52,392 --> 00:22:54,727
[Maxine] Wait, nothing we do
will be as devastating as that.
450
00:22:54,811 --> 00:22:56,312
-[Lizzy] Mm-hmm.
-[Maxine] Maybe...
451
00:22:56,813 --> 00:22:58,147
I should start a religion.
452
00:22:58,731 --> 00:23:00,566
-[buzzing repeatedly]
-Come on, man.
Please don't be fucking dead.
453
00:23:04,904 --> 00:23:05,863
Fuck.
454
00:23:09,450 --> 00:23:10,785
Yay. Uh...
455
00:23:10,868 --> 00:23:14,163
I'd like to report a gas leak...
every fucking day, please.
456
00:23:14,247 --> 00:23:16,457
Every day I'd like to report a gas leak.
457
00:23:16,541 --> 00:23:18,918
Sorry for cursing. It's Ruth Brenner.
458
00:23:19,001 --> 00:23:21,838
B.R.E.N.N.E.R, 311 East 12th.
459
00:23:21,921 --> 00:23:22,755
Thank you.
Hey.
460
00:23:24,799 --> 00:23:26,759
-Did you die?
-Did you die?
461
00:23:26,843 --> 00:23:27,885
No.
462
00:23:27,969 --> 00:23:30,430
-I think we're dying at the same time.
-[object clatters]
463
00:23:34,016 --> 00:23:39,480
♪ All I need is some sunshine ♪
464
00:23:41,274 --> 00:23:46,362
♪ All I need ♪
465
00:23:47,613 --> 00:23:53,369
♪ All I need is some sunshine ♪
466
00:23:54,912 --> 00:24:00,334
♪ All I need ♪
467
00:24:08,426 --> 00:24:12,388
♪ The siren call beyond the treeline ♪