1
00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:28,240
♪ Earth stood hard as iron ♪
2
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:34,357
♪ Water like a stone ♪
3
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:40,238
♪ Snow had fallen
Snow on snow ♪
4
00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:45,556
- ♪ Snow on snow ♪
- (whispers) Stand up straight.
5
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:51,595
- ♪ In the bleak midwinter ♪
- Meant to be quiet.
6
00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:55,674
- Liam? Liam?
- ♪ Long ago ♪
7
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,519
- Hi.
- (shushes) What are you doing?
8
00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:04,515
♪ Our God, Heaven cannot hold Him ♪
9
00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:08,316
♪ Nor earth sustain... ♪
10
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:10,558
(snow crunching)
11
00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:12,679
(birds cawing)
12
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:22,276
(kicks door)
13
00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:24,238
woman:
Okay, everyone into your position.
14
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:28,474
I'm missing a sheep and an angel.
Has anyone...?
15
00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:33,156
There you are. Liam, Lacey,
do you want to come join us?
16
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,656
Lacey Burns-Beeby: (whispering)
Not really.
17
00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:35,830
woman: We need ya.
18
00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:37,120
(whispers) What?
19
00:02:37,122 --> 00:02:38,920
Do you know how we come to church
once a year?
20
00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:41,336
Do you want to come every Sunday?
21
00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:42,635
- (loudly) No!
- No!
22
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,032
(shushes)
Okay. We have to make tonight count.
23
00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:50,160
- Go make me proud.
- Liam Burns-Beeby: (softly) Okay.
24
00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:56,840
(dog barks)
25
00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:06,399
(girls sing)
♪ The holly and the ivy ♪
26
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:08,836
♪ When they're both full grown ♪
27
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,080
- Liam: Quiet!
- ♪ Of all the trees that are in... ♪
28
00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:13,197
- Liam: Mommy! Quiet!
- Holly Burns: Come on,
29
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,033
Where's your Christmas spirit, Liam?
30
00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:17,032
♪ O the rising of the sun ♪
31
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:20,238
- ♪ And the running of the deer ♪
- Liam: Quiet!
32
00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:31,976
- Lacey: That's mine.
- Liam: No it's not.
33
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,070
Holly: You guys?
34
00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:36,233
Good kids... get better gifts.
35
00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:37,835
(kids gasp, laugh)
36
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:39,994
Wait, you did not just do that.
37
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:41,719
I did. You noticed that, didn't you?
38
00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:43,997
- I did it because it works.
- That's not fair.
39
00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:46,715
- You didn't do it to me.
- Worked on you for years. Always.
40
00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:49,440
- Look we're home.
- kids: Yay!
41
00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:53,993
- Liam: What?
- Ivy Burns: What the...?
42
00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:58,079
(softly) Oh my God.
43
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:03,476
Mom? Mom? No, don't!
44
00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:13,992
Oh my God, I can't believe it!
45
00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:16,800
Hi Mom.
46
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,713
Oh, let me see you? Is it you?
47
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:19,880
(Ben Burns laughs)
48
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,000
Lacey: Is that Ben?
49
00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:24,876
Come on, look!
50
00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:26,760
- Lacey: It's Ben.
- Liam: Yeah, it is Ben.
51
00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:28,376
Lacey:
Let go of my waist. Ben, hooray!
52
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:29,834
Oh my God. I was just,
53
00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:33,477
I was truly just wondering,
just wondering what if.
54
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:35,200
Lacey: Ben!
55
00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:37,280
Don't let go.
56
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:39,916
(kids hollering)
57
00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:43,152
(line trilling)
58
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:47,513
So my roommate Timmy has two years,
and is like a recovery rock star.
59
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:51,270
And he offers me a free ride.
And I was like, "Yeah, I'm down."
60
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:52,640
But I'm thinking that there's,
61
00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,996
there's no way
my sponsor's gonna go for this.
62
00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:56,160
- But he did.
- He did,
63
00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:58,351
because that's how good I'm doing.
64
00:04:58,520 --> 00:04:59,749
Wow, honey.
65
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,760
So Timmy's mom and dad
and little brother pick us up.
66
00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:04,156
I'm squeezed in the middle.
67
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:05,396
They're very Christian.
68
00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:07,656
They're all super healthy.
They don't even drink caffeine.
69
00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:09,194
- (dog barks)
- Holly: Oh, how great.
70
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,238
Mom, Ben is feeding Ponce.
71
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:13,073
Oh, yeah, guilty.
72
00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:14,640
Ivy:
Bread is bad for his teeth.
73
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:16,359
I think a little bit is okay, honey.
74
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,274
- Holly: Okay, go on.
- Okay.
75
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:20,432
So we're like ten minutes
into the ride.
76
00:05:20,840 --> 00:05:25,232
And suddenly there's this smell.
It just hangs there. (laughs)
77
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:30,674
And just when it starts to clear,
another cloud of stink is unleashed.
78
00:05:30,840 --> 00:05:32,640
- Wait, it's human. Oh my God.
- Ben: Mm-hmm.
79
00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:36,350
- It was the silent but deadly kind.
- Oh my God. That's the worst kind.
80
00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:38,995
This is great.
This is so great, you know.
81
00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:41,470
Ponce, all of us in the kitchen.
82
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:43,070
You happy.
83
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:44,556
Zip me, please.
84
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:47,030
Holly:
Oh, you got one on. Good job. Okay.
85
00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:49,436
- Leave these on, okay? All right.
- Liam: Bye.
86
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:50,750
- Be smart.
- Lacey: Bye.
87
00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:52,354
All right, then what happened?
88
00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,638
Okay, so we're trapped in back,
and the farts just keep on coming.
89
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:57,875
And so I'm thinking,
90
00:05:58,080 --> 00:06:00,515
surely someone is going to say
"Sorry" or "Excuse me."
91
00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:02,816
- Holly: "Excuse me," yes.
- Or like maybe crack a window.
92
00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:04,593
But no,
they act like nothing is wrong.
93
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:05,800
Oh, God.
94
00:06:05,880 --> 00:06:08,076
So I just said,
"You know you can let me out here."
95
00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:10,990
Mom, it's not that funny.
96
00:06:11,280 --> 00:06:12,350
But it is.
97
00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,557
So I just hiked
the rest of the way home.
98
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:15,950
You didn't?
99
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:17,600
- (loud thud)
- (Holly cries out)
100
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:19,353
Oh, they did it again.
101
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,429
All right.
(shouting) You're gonna regret this!
102
00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:23,795
Oh, go get 'em.
103
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,434
The big brother.
104
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,313
(Ben yelling)
105
00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,351
(kids laughing in distance)
106
00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:39,120
(Ben yells loudly)
107
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,354
Liam: Yeah!
108
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:49,636
- Ivy: Mom? Mom?
- Did you see?
109
00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:50,956
He's gained some weight
110
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:53,231
and he's got the sparkle back
in his eyes.
111
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,629
He's clearly doing better.
112
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,315
- Then why are you hiding everything?
- You know why.
113
00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,799
Ivy: It's sad, having to hide.
114
00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:02,192
Well, I would do the same for you.
115
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:03,629
But you'll never have to.
116
00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:07,439
Sweetie, I've got
a very good feeling about this.
117
00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:08,716
Well, I don't.
118
00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:12,396
Listen, this time will be different.
You'll see, it will.
119
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:14,400
Mom?
120
00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:16,270
Why is he here anyway?
121
00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:18,318
Weren't we supposed
to go visit him tomorrow?
122
00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:20,598
(kids coming inside the house)
123
00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:22,752
- Okay, you need to go watch him.
- No.
124
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:24,760
No, he'll think I'm spying.
125
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:28,397
No, then just film him
on your phone then, hmm?
126
00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:30,640
Are you serious?
127
00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:32,513
Yes Ivy, now.
128
00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,354
Lacey: I want hot chocolate.
129
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,311
(yelling)
130
00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:43,309
(Ponce barks)
131
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:44,670
Lacey: Go! Go!
132
00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:47,439
- (kids laughing)
- What are you doing?
133
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:50,037
I'm making a video
of holiday highlights.
134
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:55,237
(kids yelling, laughing)
135
00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:01,952
(pills rattling)
136
00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:15,312
- (kids yelling, laughing)
- (Ponce barks)
137
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,117
Liam: Come here, boy.
Come on, pup!
138
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:37,795
Lacey: No!
139
00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:42,153
I was using it. Don't do that. No!
140
00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:43,840
(toy squeaks)
141
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:47,876
(Ben hums a song)
142
00:08:55,880 --> 00:08:59,191
♪ When Ben was ten ♪
143
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,516
- ♪ Lacey was a baby ♪ (laughs)
- (Lacey laughs)
144
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:08,354
♪ When Ben was ten ♪
145
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,072
- ♪ Liam was a maybe ♪
- (Liam joins in)
146
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:19,233
- Ben: ♪ And now we're all here ♪
- (Ponce barks)
147
00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:22,440
- ♪ So let's go crazy ♪
- (both kids sing along excitedly)
148
00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:25,636
(all, loudly) ♪ Let's go crazy ♪
149
00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:28,880
♪ Who's going to go crazy? ♪
150
00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:30,040
Holly: Neal?
151
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,876
♪ Are going crazy ♪
152
00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,360
I've got it under control.
153
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:37,600
Neal Beeby:
Ivy called, texted, why didn't you?
154
00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:40,354
♪ Let's go crazy ♪
155
00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:44,395
♪ Let's go... crazy ♪
156
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:48,476
Hey, Neal.
157
00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:50,756
Hey, Ben.
158
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:55,679
How about 15 extra minutes
of screen time starting right now.
159
00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:56,956
Yay!
160
00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:03,554
Liam:
Come on, hurry up!
161
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,275
I'm confused.
162
00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:12,317
I thought we had an understanding.
163
00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:17,431
The therapists, the doctors,
everyone.
164
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:20,991
Even you agreed that
it's in your best interest
165
00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,117
not to be home yet.
166
00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:24,280
I know.
167
00:10:24,282 --> 00:10:26,795
There's too many triggers
for you here.
168
00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:28,950
That was months ago.
169
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,157
And your sponsor said.
170
00:10:31,320 --> 00:10:34,518
Please, let Ben tell me,
please, honey.
171
00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:36,000
Ben:
Okay, I know...
172
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,391
I know I really fucked up
last Christmas.
173
00:10:39,560 --> 00:10:40,994
Ivy:
And the one before that.
174
00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:44,600
It's true.
175
00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:47,590
Ben: Yeah,
I know I've made a lot of mistakes.
176
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:49,960
But...
177
00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:55,195
now since I'm doing so good
and with all the support I'm getting,
178
00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:58,398
and with my sponsor...
179
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:03,231
I honestly didn't think I'd ever...
feel this good again.
180
00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,070
What, you don't believe me?
181
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,754
Sweetie, we do.
182
00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:14,037
Which is why she hid
all the meds and the jewelry.
183
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,590
I was just removing the temptation.
184
00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:21,875
Wow, fuck,
you're all still scared of me.
185
00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:27,349
Which is the last thing
I want to make any of you feel.
186
00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,955
You should just...
you should take me back.
187
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:42,160
Mom, take me back.
188
00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:48,240
- (security alarm) Front door.
- (door slams)
189
00:11:49,680 --> 00:11:52,149
- Ivy: Mom.
- Neal: He should have known better.
190
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:54,596
Don't blame him. It's my fault.
191
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:58,336
When he called and asked
what I wanted for Christmas
192
00:11:58,360 --> 00:12:00,352
I shouldn't have said "him home".
193
00:12:00,560 --> 00:12:01,755
That's what you said?
194
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,513
I wanted him to know I missed him.
195
00:12:03,680 --> 00:12:06,718
I didn't... I never dreamed
he would just show up.
196
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:08,720
Is he in the car?
197
00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:09,920
Yep.
198
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:12,672
It's not like he came home to stay.
199
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,071
Obviously,
that can't happen right now.
200
00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:16,336
It wouldn't be good for him.
201
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,680
He needs to go back.
202
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:18,916
Holly: I agree.
203
00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:20,910
If it weren't Christmas.
204
00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,436
- It's the right thing, honey.
- It is, mom.
205
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:25,080
We hope. We don't know.
206
00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:29,196
I mean, I'm so God damn angry
at the two of you right now.
207
00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:31,591
- I am.
- What did I do?
208
00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,991
You gave up on him.
You both have.
209
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:36,197
This is not giving up.
210
00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,836
- It is.
- It's no, it's giving a shit.
211
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:42,437
Which we do about what's best for him
and for you.
212
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,240
- You have a problem with him, Neal.
- No.
213
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,477
I'm routing for him.
But I'm frustrated.
214
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,240
He's lucky.
We're playing loose with him.
215
00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:49,280
Holly: Okay, Neal...
216
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:51,352
If he were black,
he would be in jail by now.
217
00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:53,150
Maybe this isn't the time.
218
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:55,471
We said we weren't going to
do this again.
219
00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:56,676
Remember?
220
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:00,395
I remember.
221
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:05,233
(scribbling)
222
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,196
Neal: Holly.
223
00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:12,557
Here's the list. I don't care
who gets what, just get it done.
224
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,313
(slams hand on the table)
Yeah?
225
00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:23,640
(sighs)
226
00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,358
- (keys drop)
- God damnit.
227
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:31,392
God damnit!
228
00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:33,840
We're all set.
229
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:47,678
It's okay, Mom. It's for the best.
230
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:52,600
Seatbelt, please.
231
00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:07,392
Mom.
(yelling) Mom!
232
00:14:07,560 --> 00:14:09,313
- (breaks slam)
- God.
233
00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:16,440
What?
234
00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:19,320
I'm thinking.
235
00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:22,696
Holly:
It's cold. You don't have a coat on.
236
00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:24,359
Just let me get this over with, okay?
237
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:27,272
(indistinct chatter)
238
00:14:32,840 --> 00:14:36,550
All right, come on.
(rubs palms together for warmth)
239
00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:46,680
Okay.
240
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:49,472
Here's the deal,
and it is not negotiable.
241
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:51,040
You get a day.
242
00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:53,680
Are you sure?
243
00:14:53,682 --> 00:14:56,400
So long as you pass the drug test
I'm about to administer,
244
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:57,789
stay clean while you're here,
245
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,281
and that this time tomorrow,
you are back in Sober Living.
246
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,278
- Yeah, okay.
- Now, I'm not done.
247
00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:06,316
These are our terms and I don't give
a shit if you hate these rules.
248
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:08,711
You do not leave my sight, ever.
249
00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:11,437
You do not close the door
to your room,
250
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:13,557
where, by the way, I'll be sleeping
on the floor
251
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:14,880
and if you try to sneak off,
252
00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:16,553
if your bed so much as makes
a squeak,
253
00:15:16,720 --> 00:15:18,074
I will be all over you,
254
00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:22,393
because for the next 24 hours
you are mine, all mine, got it?
255
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:24,600
I got it.
256
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,917
Good. Let's get you tested.
257
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,559
(foot snags on door)
258
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:36,950
Mom.
259
00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,630
Relax I'm not gonna be looking
at your privates.
260
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:41,040
Okay then.
261
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:44,033
I will be keeping my eyes on you,
just like I said.
262
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:49,875
This is so not cool.
263
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:52,157
Nothing about this is cool, Ben.
264
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:58,392
- Come on, pee pee time.
- Shut up.
265
00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:02,776
Want me to turn the faucet on?
266
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:03,800
Stop.
267
00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:09,311
- Shh.
- All right.
268
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:10,994
- Sometimes it helps.
- Mm-hmm.
269
00:16:11,520 --> 00:16:13,273
- Liam: What are you doing?
- Ben: Okay.
270
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:14,669
There's a surprise coming.
271
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:15,990
Liam:
What surprise?
272
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:17,400
Do you trust me?
273
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:18,480
- Yes.
- Yes, I do.
274
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,080
Awesome, that's awesome.
275
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:21,840
Good to hear.
276
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,720
Ben: All right. You close your eyes.
277
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:25,957
- Yeah.
- Can you see anything?
278
00:16:26,120 --> 00:16:27,839
- Lacey: No.
- Okay, no peeking.
279
00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:30,440
- (chips crackle)
- (Ponce barks)
280
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,000
Liam: I hear something.
281
00:16:32,160 --> 00:16:33,992
When I was your age
this was my favorite.
282
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:36,436
- Ivy: It's gross.
- Ivy, chill out.
283
00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:38,315
Liam doesn't like crust.
284
00:16:39,240 --> 00:16:43,075
There's a crustless option
in the works.
285
00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:44,470
Oh, really?
286
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:48,030
Ben:
Are you two ready?
287
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,200
Liam:
Yes.
288
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,200
- (alarm beeps) Back door.
- Ben: Okay.
289
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:53,353
Open your eyes and feast.
290
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:57,556
(Ponce barks)
291
00:16:57,720 --> 00:16:58,720
- Yum.
- Yum.
292
00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:01,270
- Right?
- Lacey: It's really good.
293
00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,638
- What have you done?
- I know. And there's no going back.
294
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:07,600
Lacey: More, please.
295
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,030
Lacey:
But Ashley's wings have glitter.
296
00:17:11,360 --> 00:17:14,273
Holly: Well, we are going to
bedazzle these things like crazy.
297
00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:16,238
Mom, seriously they're so good.
298
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,436
I don't want to brag.
299
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,632
Well, yeah, I do.
These are gonna be good.
300
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,280
(timer dings)
301
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:24,360
Ben?
302
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,559
(Ponce whining)
303
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,359
- (Holly gasps)
- (Ponce whines)
304
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:39,800
Ponce, hey, bud.
305
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,878
(Ben laughs)
306
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:46,358
- Hi, momma.
- I knew it.
307
00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:49,472
You came back for Ponce.
308
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:50,710
(whispers)
Busted.
309
00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:52,789
Actually, no.
310
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:05,072
(whispers) Okay, let's party.
311
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,359
(line trills)
312
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:10,816
(Ben, outside) You know, I really
would appreciate it if you didn't...
313
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,194
- Neal: Holly?
- Hi.
314
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,278
- How did the test go?
- Negative.
315
00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:15,794
- That's great.
- Yeah.
316
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:18,233
Holly:
And he's helping out with chores.
317
00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:19,400
Neal: Really?
318
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,400
Okay, well,
I left word with Sober Living.
319
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:24,880
Okay.
320
00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:29,432
It hurts...
to think about the shit I've done.
321
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:34,073
And what I'm learning in recovery
is I can't undo what I've done
322
00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:35,754
but I can do it differently now.
323
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:38,276
- I think we're good here.
- One, just one second, Ivy.
324
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:42,036
What I mean is I have to be present.
325
00:18:42,200 --> 00:18:43,600
- It's about this log.
- Okay.
326
00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:44,989
- This log.
- That's enough.
327
00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:48,073
It's about taking care of this log
and placing it here.
328
00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:50,311
And I have to take it
one log at a time.
329
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:52,159
- No. Stop.
- Otherwise it's not gonna...
330
00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:53,635
Ben, stop!
331
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,360
(Ben sighs)
332
00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:04,274
(Ivy cries out) Oh, my god!
333
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:06,160
- Ben: Come on, you got this.
- (Ivy laughs)
334
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:08,874
- Come on.
- Fine, just leave it.
335
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,278
We don't need any more, Ben.
Cleaning up your mess.
336
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:14,113
Ben:
You can do it, we're gonna do it.
337
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,998
- Ben: Ivy.
- Ivy: It is so heavy.
338
00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:19,999
- Ben: Here you go.
- Ivy: Ponce?
339
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:21,836
Ivy: Nice.
340
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:25,630
("Frosty the Snowman"
plays on the radio)
341
00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:27,793
We're in no danger of it burning out.
342
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,191
What the fuck is this?
Where did our ornaments go?
343
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,633
They don't share
the current aesthetic.
344
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:34,154
Is there a problem?
345
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:37,755
Ben was just asking
where our old ornaments are.
346
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:39,754
Did you throw them away?
347
00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:48,590
Come with me.
348
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:56,314
Be quick and be careful, yeah?
349
00:19:57,520 --> 00:19:59,193
- Mommy?
- Yes, yes.
350
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:11,400
(box rattles)
351
00:20:11,560 --> 00:20:12,596
Ivy:
Do you see 'em?
352
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,754
It should be right there.
353
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:23,753
(Ben sighs)
354
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:29,560
Ben?
355
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:31,600
- (thumping)
- Ben: Fuck!
356
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:32,680
Ben?
357
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,320
Can you come up?
358
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:42,875
That's it.
359
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:44,320
(whispers) I hate it up here.
360
00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:45,834
Okay, then let's go already.
361
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,116
Wait.
362
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:48,999
I need you to check.
363
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:51,550
I'm...
364
00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:54,792
I used to stash my...
365
00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:56,156
Okay.
366
00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:03,640
Back there?
367
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,869
If there's something there
then you have to make it go away.
368
00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:20,316
Nothing.
369
00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:27,720
We're good.
370
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:30,720
I'll help you down.
371
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:34,874
Come on, let's go.
372
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:55,839
- Ivy: Oh, wow.
- Liam: Yeah!
373
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:57,190
Ivy: Ben.
374
00:21:57,960 --> 00:21:59,030
Ben: Nice.
375
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:01,272
(kids chatter)
376
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:05,400
This is better.
377
00:22:07,320 --> 00:22:09,198
- Yeah.
- Ivy: Yeah, cotton balls.
378
00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:12,353
Ben, Ivy, can you two
come with me, please?
379
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,671
Holly: I know,
I went a little overboard this year.
380
00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:18,856
- Mom?
- Holly: Keep wrapping.
381
00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:20,678
Come on. Hello.
382
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,069
- Neal: Hey honey.
- Yeah.
383
00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:24,516
- They only have regular.
- No.
384
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,919
Organic cranberries.
385
00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:29,675
Mom, we don't have to be 100%.
386
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:31,350
It's important.
387
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:32,950
- Neal: Got it.
- Okay.
388
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:35,720
Thank you. (sighs)
389
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:38,353
- Gotta love that Neal.
- Mom?
390
00:22:38,600 --> 00:22:41,559
Running all my last-minute errands
so we can just stay here till church.
391
00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:43,280
Mom, I wanna do some shopping
of my own.
392
00:22:43,360 --> 00:22:44,360
Why?
393
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,119
I want to get them something from me.
394
00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:49,400
Well, sweetie, you are the present.
395
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:51,434
Something that they can unwrap.
396
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,030
Well, okay. Let's just say
these are from you then.
397
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:56,096
But they're not really from me.
I didn't pick them out.
398
00:22:56,120 --> 00:22:58,077
- They'll never know.
- But I'll know.
399
00:22:58,240 --> 00:22:59,913
All right, well, honestly,
400
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,752
they have everything they need,
they really don't need anything more.
401
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:04,920
So true.
402
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:08,397
Okay, but if I didn't pick them out
then they're not really from me,
403
00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:09,994
which makes me a liar.
404
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:13,160
And the whole point of this
is to be honest.
405
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:14,595
It's no good if I'm not honest.
406
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:24,759
(Christmas music plays)
407
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:28,073
(loud clamoring)
408
00:23:33,280 --> 00:23:36,990
This is nice, getting to spend
a little quality alone time together.
409
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,913
What do you think
you'll wear tonight?
410
00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:47,000
This is all I brought.
411
00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:51,000
Well, no worries,
we can pick you up a sweater
412
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,635
or maybe even a whole new ensemble.
413
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:55,756
Ensemble?
414
00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:00,315
That way you'll,
I want you to be comfortable.
415
00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:01,755
Well, I'm okay with just...
416
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,110
No, come on.
417
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,514
It's Christmas Eve.
We're gonna be in a front pew.
418
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:13,350
man: Hey, Burns.
419
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:14,920
What's going on?
420
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:16,080
Hey, man.
421
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:18,073
Wow. It's been a long time.
422
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:20,594
I thought you were dead.
423
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:23,836
What's new?
424
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:25,873
- I'm good.
- Yeah?
425
00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:29,677
Dude, it's really good to see you.
426
00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:31,672
- Yeah.
- And you look good.
427
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:33,593
Oh, thank you, okay.
428
00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:40,776
Holly: He's a little
full of himself, don't you think?
429
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:41,916
He's all right.
430
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:44,956
And what's his drug of choice?
You know he has one.
431
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:47,237
Speed? Weekend cocaine?
432
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:50,120
- Highly caffeinated energy drinks?
- Mom.
433
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:54,677
All I'm saying is
you forget how special you are.
434
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,240
- Just don't.
- Well, people look up to you.
435
00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,232
And they love you.
You're a natural leader
436
00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:01,517
and you are so, so smart.
437
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,797
No, mom, Ivy is smart.
438
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:05,872
Well, nobody wants to be that smart.
439
00:25:06,040 --> 00:25:08,635
It's not like she's having
a tremendous amount of fun, hmm?
440
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,631
- What was my point?
- You don't have a point.
441
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:12,836
I do have a point.
442
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:16,550
My point is, look, you nick this
and who knows how far you can go
443
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:17,949
and what you can do.
444
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,152
There's so much to look forward to.
445
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:25,756
- (Christmas music plays in mall)
- (people laughing, talking)
446
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,640
woman: Okay, honey,
you barely touched your breakfast.
447
00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:36,911
You've got to eat this. Come on now.
448
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:39,832
Mrs. Crane, Dr. Crane.
449
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:41,434
Hello.
450
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:43,390
Do I know you?
451
00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:45,920
Holly Burns.
452
00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:47,476
Yes.
453
00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:49,040
Oh, yes.
454
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:50,560
Doesn't always remember.
455
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:55,558
Holly is the mother of Ivy,
whose singing we love.
456
00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:57,594
She was your patient.
457
00:25:58,520 --> 00:25:59,520
I remember.
458
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,433
Mrs. Crane:
You must be so proud of her.
459
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,030
I am proud of all of my children,
yes.
460
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,195
Oh, fuck.
461
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:23,398
Oh, I need to get a napkin.
462
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:24,670
I'll sit with him.
463
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:26,069
You're a dear.
464
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:27,835
Be right back.
465
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:31,993
So if you remember Ivy,
466
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:35,512
then you must remember my son Ben,
right over there.
467
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:36,990
Who?
468
00:26:40,560 --> 00:26:41,835
I don't remember him.
469
00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:44,671
I understand.
You had so many patients.
470
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:48,960
But when Ben was 14
he had a small snowboarding injury.
471
00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:51,158
And you prescribed pain killers.
472
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:55,071
And when I asked,
you told me they weren't addictive.
473
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:56,560
And kept upping his dose.
474
00:26:56,760 --> 00:26:58,592
And he got hooked
and it fucked up his life.
475
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:00,280
So you can pretend
you don't remember,
476
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:01,800
but I won't forget it.
477
00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:05,110
I hope you die a horrible death.
478
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:09,594
Merry Christmas.
479
00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:11,879
I'm just here for a day.
480
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:14,880
Okay, yeah.
481
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:16,160
I will.
482
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:19,911
Okay. Yes. I gotta go.
483
00:27:21,720 --> 00:27:22,720
Who was that?
484
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:24,556
My sponsor.
485
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:27,276
I'm feeling shaky.
486
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,117
So I, that's why I called him.
He told me to go to a meeting.
487
00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:33,955
They all say that, whenever you feel
shaky get to a meeting.
488
00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:37,397
Okay, well let's just
get your clothes and...
489
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:39,552
I gotta find a meeting, now.
490
00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,235
- Did you hear me?
- Okay.
491
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,999
Holly: I'm so proud of you,
knowing what you need.
492
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:52,311
I just, I think it's so great.
493
00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:54,989
Like they say,
it's working when you...
494
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:56,950
What do they say?
495
00:27:57,120 --> 00:27:58,856
- It works if you work it.
- Works if you work it.
496
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,395
Well, you are working it.
Oh, let's go in.
497
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:03,950
- You're not coming in.
- No, what? Of course I am.
498
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:07,073
No mom, I'm good. It's a meeting.
499
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:08,536
I'm gonna come right out afterwards.
500
00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:09,560
I may just tag along.
501
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:10,640
- Hi.
- Mom.
502
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:12,640
- man: Yo, what's up, babe?
- Hello, how are you?
503
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:13,830
Stop.
504
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:15,999
It never hurts to be friendly.
505
00:28:16,160 --> 00:28:17,230
Dial it down.
506
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:19,073
Okay, I will just... Hi.
507
00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:20,640
- woman: guys
- Hello.
508
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:23,360
Everybody seems so nice.
509
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:32,957
The minute I think I have it,
the minute I think I've got this,
510
00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:35,559
it's waiting, you know?
511
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:37,359
It's out there doing pushups
right now
512
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:39,352
while we sit in these folding chairs.
513
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,714
So I'm really grateful
to be here with all of you.
514
00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:46,760
And I thank you for keeping me clean.
Thank you for letting me share.
515
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:48,156
So...
516
00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:51,078
Thank you.
517
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:53,795
Go on to a show of hands.
518
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:55,957
I have a deep fear of using.
519
00:28:57,200 --> 00:29:00,034
I have a deep fear
of going back into those dark places.
520
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:01,350
This fellowship,
521
00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:04,513
this group of people,
is what keeps me alive.
522
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,679
Now I have two new baby nieces
523
00:29:07,840 --> 00:29:10,639
and they're going to meet me
for the first time.
524
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:15,034
I'm just so grateful
that they'll never know me high.
525
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:17,630
They'll just know me as me.
526
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:22,080
Hi, I'm Ben, and I'm an addict.
527
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:23,839
all: Hi Ben.
528
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:26,271
I got 77 days.
529
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:32,717
And that's my most ever.
530
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,038
So I just want to get
to 78 right now.
531
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:40,550
So I called my sponsor,
532
00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:45,749
and the thing about my sponsor
is that he's a loud talker.
533
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,114
And so I say, "Hey."
534
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:51,795
And he goes, (loudly) "What's up?"
535
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:53,997
And I was like,
"Well, I've got big news.
536
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:56,959
I just bought presents that
I actually picked out for someone."
537
00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,760
And he was like, "Oh, well,
you're feeling pretty good, huh?"
538
00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:00,960
I was like, "Yeah, you know,
539
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:02,958
I actually feel like
I'm being honest."
540
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:04,079
woman: Yeah.
541
00:30:04,081 --> 00:30:06,037
And, well, he said,
"If you were honest, Ben,
542
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:07,515
you'd look in the mirror
543
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:09,433
and say, 'I'm a great big phony.'"
544
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:11,154
So I was like, "Okay."
545
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:13,199
"Cause, Ben you're a fucking addict.
546
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:15,616
You're the last person who should
believe his own bullshit,
547
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:16,994
so get to a meeting."
548
00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:18,909
So here I am,
549
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,112
seventy-seven days clean.
550
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:24,237
Some things are better now.
551
00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:27,271
Like I can actually take a shit.
552
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:28,994
(laughter)
553
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:30,520
Yeah.
554
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:32,395
Even better than that,
555
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:34,956
I'm waking up more often than not
with an erection.
556
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,116
Sorry, mom. Yeah, my mom's here.
557
00:30:40,280 --> 00:30:41,953
(loud laughter)
558
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:43,349
Ben: Um...
559
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,439
I've put her through a lot.
560
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:53,440
This summer she found me upside down
on the stairs
561
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:55,831
with a needle in my arm.
562
00:30:57,280 --> 00:30:58,396
And...
563
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,271
with my dog trying to keep me awake.
564
00:31:02,920 --> 00:31:03,990
So...
565
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:08,116
the doctor said that if it weren't
for my dog I would be dead.
566
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:10,275
And my mom.
567
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:14,632
Without her, I wouldn't be here
right now in this room.
568
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:22,556
(voice shaking) The things that
I've done to myself and others...
569
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:26,110
(Ben sniffles)
570
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:28,277
So I don't, why am I still...
571
00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:30,796
here?
572
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:34,674
There's gotta be a reason.
573
00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:39,399
Maybe it's to come back
and make this Christmas right,
574
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:43,440
or maybe this is the biggest
fucking mistake of my life.
575
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:45,596
Um...
576
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:48,435
Anyways, here I am, still here.
577
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,231
So thank you. Thank you for having...
578
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:57,473
all: Grant us the serenity
579
00:31:57,720 --> 00:32:00,315
to accept the things
we cannot change,
580
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:03,115
the courage to change
the things we can,
581
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:05,476
and the wisdom to know
the difference.
582
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:07,030
Keep coming back.
583
00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:08,919
It works if you work it.
584
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:17,476
Ben?
585
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:20,640
- Ben, good job, sweetie.
- Thanks.
586
00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:22,593
And you coming back is not a mistake.
587
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:26,276
Someone wiser than me,
your sponsor, said you can do this.
588
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:28,797
Okay. Yeah, that's right.
589
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:32,336
I think some people want to talk
to you. I'll just wait over here.
590
00:32:32,360 --> 00:32:33,476
Okay.
591
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:38,717
Say man, thanks for your share.
It's been a long time, you know.
592
00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:41,079
- Ben: Yeah.
- man: That really hit home.
593
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:43,838
- Thanks, man.
- Thank you.
594
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,755
(people chatting)
595
00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:50,720
woman: Hey.
596
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:54,193
I loved what you said.
You were very funny.
597
00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,551
There's not enough funny around here.
598
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,040
Thanks.
599
00:32:59,480 --> 00:33:01,358
- You're the mom?
- Yes, I am.
600
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:02,920
It's great you came with him.
601
00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:04,190
- Oh, I hope so.
- No,
602
00:33:04,360 --> 00:33:06,511
my mom died before I ever got clean.
603
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:09,320
I would have given anything for her
to see me get my shit together.
604
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:10,556
I'm sure.
605
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:13,910
- woman: The hard on thing.
- Oh, awkward.
606
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:15,958
No, It was honest.
607
00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:20,156
And it was amusing
that someone young and hot...
608
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:22,355
woman: Oh, shit.
609
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:25,160
- Oh, that's okay.
- I'm blushing now.
610
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:27,635
That makes me nervous.
611
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:30,119
Is this your first meeting?
612
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:32,596
- Yeah. I'm, you know, new to it all.
- Yeah?
613
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:36,640
Well, you should get a sponsor.
It should be a woman.
614
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:39,440
It should be someone really tough
who will, you know,
615
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:40,716
call you on your bullshit
616
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:43,634
and it's what it's all about,
you know,
617
00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:45,835
rigorous honesty.
618
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:49,318
Oh, they're just talking program.
That's how we help each other.
619
00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:52,674
Okay.
So, nothing to worry about then.
620
00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:54,633
No, I didn't say that.
621
00:33:57,880 --> 00:33:59,519
You don't remember, do you?
622
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:03,280
No.
623
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:06,714
You were my dealer.
624
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:10,635
Oh fuck. Oh, I'm sorry.
625
00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:12,519
No, it's fine. I'm...
626
00:34:12,680 --> 00:34:15,354
I'm going to rehab
the day after Christmas.
627
00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:19,514
So that's why, you know, I related
to so much to what you were saying.
628
00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:21,000
It was very inspiring.
629
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:22,880
So...
630
00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:27,475
I just want to get high
just one last time.
631
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:29,950
- That's normal.
- I'm not going to though.
632
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,158
Good. Don't.
633
00:34:33,240 --> 00:34:34,674
Unless I could do it with you.
634
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,075
(sighs)
635
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:49,553
- woman: Have a good one.
- Merry Christmas.
636
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:59,719
I think this one will work.
637
00:34:59,880 --> 00:35:01,951
Or this.
638
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:05,154
And they have it in light blue.
Everybody looks good in light blue.
639
00:35:06,240 --> 00:35:07,435
- Ben?
- What?
640
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:08,800
Which?
641
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:10,673
Yes. Good.
642
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:12,035
Okay, light blue.
643
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:19,314
Looks like she's gonna have you
try on the whole store. (laughs)
644
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:20,556
Right.
645
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:23,359
- Holly: Thank you so much.
- woman: Sure.
646
00:35:23,920 --> 00:35:26,389
These will both complement
your complexion,
647
00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:28,796
which is a gift from your mother,
you're welcome.
648
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,634
- Coat, please.
- Okay, nice. I'm good.
649
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:32,916
Come on.
650
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:41,870
Pockets.
651
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:52,150
- This is humiliating.
- Shh.
652
00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:53,320
No.
653
00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:55,635
This is love.
654
00:35:57,080 --> 00:35:58,309
All right, free to go.
655
00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:03,319
You didn't check my shoes.
656
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:12,874
(knocks) That's not funny.
657
00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:14,760
It was a joke, Mom.
658
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:16,798
- Ben, it's not funny.
- Mom, it was a joke.
659
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:18,110
Excuse me.
660
00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:20,357
Can I get a key to this door, please?
661
00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:23,519
Unlock the door, Ben, right now. Ben?
662
00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:25,996
(Holly knocks loudly)
Open the door.
663
00:36:26,240 --> 00:36:27,776
- (whispers) Fuck!
- Holly: This is not funny.
664
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:30,474
(yelling)
Open this fucking door right now.
665
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,633
Ben, God damnit,
open this fucking door.
666
00:36:36,240 --> 00:36:37,720
What is going on?
667
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:42,715
What's going on?
668
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:47,596
What?
669
00:36:58,560 --> 00:36:59,835
Fuck, you stupid...
670
00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:02,595
- Hey!
- Where did you get this?
671
00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:04,752
- I've been with you the whole time!
- Excuse me.
672
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:06,149
The girl at the meeting.
673
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:08,960
- The one that you're helping?
- She was going to use...
674
00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:11,256
- So I took it from her.
- I have to ask you to leave.
675
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:12,794
She was going to use. Now she can't.
676
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:15,356
Mom, the last time
I didn't help someone they died.
677
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:16,636
Ma'am?
678
00:37:20,680 --> 00:37:24,151
- You think I'm an idiot.
- Can you please just exit the store.
679
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:26,277
- Yes.
- Oh, fuck. Maybe she's a dealer.
680
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:28,113
- What?
- Maybe she played me.
681
00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:30,400
- You can't trust addicts.
- All we do is fucking lie.
682
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:32,273
- What do I do with that?
- I don't know.
683
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:33,760
Mind your own fucking business!
684
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:36,476
(brakes squeal)
685
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:38,600
Mom. What...?
686
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:40,160
Get out of the car.
687
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:41,680
What is this?
688
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,756
- What are we doing here?
- Get out of the car!
689
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,000
- Now!
- Why are you...?
690
00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:52,510
Because I was too angry
to do it at the time.
691
00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:54,080
Huh? So where?
692
00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:57,354
Where do you want to be?
Don't say next to grandpa.
693
00:37:57,520 --> 00:37:59,955
That's prime placement,
and you don't get that when you OD.
694
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:01,395
- I'm not gonna OD.
- So where?
695
00:38:01,560 --> 00:38:04,871
The new section is nice.
Or do you want to be near a tree?
696
00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:07,880
- I don't know.
- Well, you better figure it out.
697
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:10,879
Okay, why don't you cremate me
and sprinkle me over Mrs. Blank,
698
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:12,696
my second-grade teacher,
she was pretty hot.
699
00:38:12,720 --> 00:38:14,552
You don't get to be the smart ass
about this.
700
00:38:14,720 --> 00:38:17,713
I wasn't gonna use.
I'm not gonna use.
701
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:19,109
- You just...
- Mom...
702
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:21,920
You just told me
I should never believe you.
703
00:38:22,880 --> 00:38:24,678
Don't say another fucking word.
704
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:28,950
Just tell me, son...
705
00:38:29,720 --> 00:38:31,791
where you want me to bury you.
706
00:38:35,240 --> 00:38:36,469
I'll wait all day.
707
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:39,714
I'm not going to die.
708
00:38:41,400 --> 00:38:43,392
This rate you will, and soon.
709
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:07,154
Mommy's here.
710
00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:11,514
They didn't like my spaghetti special
for some reason.
711
00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:12,955
Go figure.
712
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:16,831
Ben they only wanted your sandwich.
What did you put in it?
713
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:18,952
- Drugs.
- Holly: It's not funny.
714
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:20,950
Ivy: It was a joke.
715
00:39:21,120 --> 00:39:22,315
It's still not funny.
716
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:25,360
- Holly: The kids are watching TV?
- Yeah, they're watching TV.
717
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:27,280
- You okay?
- Holly: You come with me.
718
00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:31,872
- Hi, sweethearts.
- Hi, Mommy.
719
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:33,520
Ben is gonna watch some TV with you.
720
00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:34,471
Liam: Yay!
721
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:36,599
Mom, can I talk to you for a second.
722
00:39:36,601 --> 00:39:37,954
Sit down.
723
00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:40,637
(on TV)
...and now I can't find her anywhere.
724
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:41,995
Liam: Come on.
725
00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:43,310
Right in the middle.
726
00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:46,360
Stay.
727
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:49,598
(on TV) Everyone grab onto me,
and I'll swing on this tree branch
728
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:50,989
into the pond!
729
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:54,034
Wow! Did you see that?
730
00:39:56,880 --> 00:39:58,678
You fucking monster.
731
00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:02,034
(knocking)
732
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:03,589
Neal:
Honey, you okay in there?
733
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:06,229
Yes. Just getting changed.
734
00:40:07,160 --> 00:40:09,391
How'd it go? How's he,
how's he doing?
735
00:40:11,720 --> 00:40:13,473
Great. He's doing great.
736
00:40:13,720 --> 00:40:15,200
How are you doing?
737
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:17,194
I am doing...
738
00:40:18,240 --> 00:40:19,390
(softly) great.
739
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:23,431
Well, I better get ready.
740
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:26,919
Of course. You get ready.
I will take care of the children.
741
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:28,120
Thank you.
742
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:30,471
(Ivy singing scales,
accompanied by a piano)
743
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:32,230
(Ponce barks)
744
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:34,874
Holly: Could you just...?
745
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:43,758
No, not those slacks.
The ones from when you were skinny.
746
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:44,960
Skinnier.
747
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,271
- Ivy?
- (annoyed) What?
748
00:40:47,440 --> 00:40:49,716
I need more big safety pins,
there's some in the kitchen.
749
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:51,400
Liam: Come on.
750
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:55,159
You sounded great by the way.
Thank you.
751
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:57,434
I'm feeding Ponce.
752
00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,677
- Oh, so glad. Thanks, honey.
- Mom?
753
00:40:59,840 --> 00:41:02,275
- Yes, sweetie.
- It itches.
754
00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:04,233
- Where?
- Everywhere.
755
00:41:04,440 --> 00:41:07,016
I wish I'd known that earlier.
Mommy can't do anything about it now.
756
00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:08,599
But it's everywhere.
757
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:10,513
Well, it's just part of being
a sheep.
758
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:13,878
Hey, buddy, the thing about an itch
is just don't scratch.
759
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:16,438
- I'm sorry...
- Ivy!
760
00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:19,392
Thank you. I beg your pardon.
761
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:27,033
- I'm gonna need a sweater.
- Okay. Coming right up.
762
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,437
All right, everybody,
let's get going.
763
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:31,398
We don't want to be late.
764
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:34,229
I'm so sorry.
765
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:35,994
(slams pants on Ben)
Don't.
766
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:38,989
(kids chattering)
767
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:44,630
(sighs)
768
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:48,314
(indistinct chatter)
769
00:41:56,200 --> 00:41:58,840
(organ playing)
770
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:08,870
Stay put.
771
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:18,400
(softly)
I'm so sorry, Beth.
772
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:20,955
This has gotta hurt.
773
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:29,274
Maggie was an angel.
774
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:32,839
We think about her.
775
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:39,680
(voice breaking)
Hold on tight.
776
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:42,390
I am.
777
00:42:55,920 --> 00:43:00,153
(organ plays
"O Come, All Ye Faithful")
778
00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:07,480
What'd she say?
779
00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:11,120
No one blames you.
780
00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:15,480
woman: "There were shepherds
out in the field,
781
00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:17,956
keeping watch over their flock
by night.
782
00:43:18,360 --> 00:43:20,875
And an angel of the Lord
appeared to them."
783
00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:22,040
Hi, Ben.
784
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:23,720
"The glory of the Lord
shone around them.
785
00:43:23,840 --> 00:43:25,479
And they were filled with fear.
786
00:43:25,640 --> 00:43:28,519
And the angel said to them,
'Be not afraid.
787
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:32,913
I bring you good news of a great joy,
which will come to all the people.
788
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:36,073
For to you is born this day
in the City of David
789
00:43:36,240 --> 00:43:38,516
a savior who is Christ the Lord.
790
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:42,430
You will find a babe
wrapped in swaddling clothes
791
00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:44,279
and lying in a manger.'"
792
00:43:48,880 --> 00:43:51,998
♪ O holy night ♪
793
00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:56,677
♪ The stars are brightly shining ♪
794
00:43:56,840 --> 00:44:02,393
♪ It is the night of
Our dear Savior's birth ♪
795
00:44:05,120 --> 00:44:08,113
♪ Long lay the world ♪
796
00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:12,593
♪ In sin and error pining ♪
797
00:44:12,760 --> 00:44:19,473
♪ Till He appeared
And the soul felt its worth ♪
798
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:24,237
- ♪ A thrill of hope ♪
- ♪ A thrill of hope ♪
799
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:28,030
♪ The weary world rejoices ♪
800
00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:31,637
- ♪ For yonder breaks ♪
- ♪ A new and... ♪
801
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:35,191
- ♪ A new glorious morn ♪
- ♪ Glorious morn ♪
802
00:44:35,520 --> 00:44:41,471
♪ Fall on your knees ♪
803
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:48,513
♪ And hear the angels' voices ♪
804
00:44:48,720 --> 00:44:54,717
♪ O night divine ♪
805
00:44:54,920 --> 00:45:01,838
♪ O night when Christ was born ♪
806
00:45:02,960 --> 00:45:07,000
♪ O night ♪
807
00:45:07,160 --> 00:45:12,918
♪ Divine
O night ♪
808
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:18,838
♪ O night divine ♪
809
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:20,354
Hey!
810
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:24,231
May I say, Ivy, by the way,
this was your best singing ever.
811
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:26,756
I think the two of you were great.
812
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:29,276
Yeah, they're completely right.
You were amazing.
813
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,591
- Yeah, you were awesome.
- You were really amazing.
814
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:33,672
- And you, little buddy...
- You think so?
815
00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:36,992
...for a second there I literally
thought that you were a sheep.
816
00:45:37,160 --> 00:45:41,837
And you didn't even have to pretend,
because you're an angel.
817
00:45:43,240 --> 00:45:46,711
(indistinct, happy chatter)
818
00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:50,394
Holly: All right kiddos,
819
00:45:50,720 --> 00:45:52,951
jammies and teeth brushed
right now, please.
820
00:45:53,120 --> 00:45:55,635
All right, come on, no...
821
00:45:56,560 --> 00:45:58,438
- Lacey: What happened?
- Holly: Oh my God.
822
00:45:58,720 --> 00:46:00,951
- Okay kids, sit down.
- Stay right here.
823
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:04,079
- Don't move.
- Holly: Sit down right here.
824
00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:06,920
- Liam: Mom...
- Sit down. It's okay, honey.
825
00:46:07,920 --> 00:46:10,360
- Neal: There's broken glass.
- Holly: Don't be scared, honey.
826
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:11,440
Neal: Ben!
827
00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:12,920
Holly:
Daddy is just checking and...
828
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:14,910
Holly: Be careful.
829
00:46:16,840 --> 00:46:18,672
(breathing heavily)
830
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:24,952
(panting) Come on, come on, come on.
831
00:46:25,120 --> 00:46:27,536
- This can't be happening. Not again.
- Neal: Stay right here.
832
00:46:27,560 --> 00:46:28,880
- It's okay. I know.
- Don't move.
833
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:30,753
- I'm scared.
- It's okay, honey.
834
00:46:33,720 --> 00:46:36,599
(whispering)
Come on, mother fucker. Okay.
835
00:46:40,600 --> 00:46:41,716
What?
836
00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:44,720
I was at church.
837
00:46:47,320 --> 00:46:49,073
Coast is clear.
838
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:53,472
We still got the TV,
and we got the computers,
839
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:57,520
and most importantly,
we got the presents.
840
00:46:57,680 --> 00:46:59,000
- See.
- (Ben exhales with relief)
841
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:03,394
It was probably just neighborhood
kids, just a practical joke.
842
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:04,596
Neal?
843
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:07,470
- No real damage.
- That's a relief.
844
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:10,356
- Where's Ponce?
- Ben: I don't know.
845
00:47:10,520 --> 00:47:11,954
I'm sure he's here somewhere.
846
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:15,473
- Mom, where's Ponce?
- You just checked the whole house.
847
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:17,640
- He's probably just hiding.
- You didn't see him?
848
00:47:17,760 --> 00:47:19,353
- I want to find Ponce.
- No.
849
00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:21,517
- It's way past your bedtime.
- Ponce?
850
00:47:21,680 --> 00:47:23,114
- Go upstairs.
- Liam: But mom...
851
00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:24,396
Ivy: Ponce?
852
00:47:24,560 --> 00:47:26,800
- Liam: I want to find Ponce.
- Holly: Come on. Upstairs.
853
00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:29,320
Fuck.
854
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:30,996
Ponce?
855
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:34,634
Come on Poncie!
(high pitched) Come on Poncie!
856
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:37,469
I bet he just, you know,
went out exploring.
857
00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:39,279
No he didn't.
858
00:47:39,720 --> 00:47:44,237
Sweetie, he is just having
a Christmas adventure, all right?
859
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:45,636
Ivy:
Come on, Ponce!
860
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:47,600
Ponce?
861
00:47:47,680 --> 00:47:49,911
Holly:
Okay, snuggle down.
862
00:47:50,240 --> 00:47:52,675
- (ornaments breaking)
- (alarm) Front door.
863
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:54,513
Ivy: I can't find him anywhere.
864
00:47:54,840 --> 00:47:56,479
And he would never run off.
865
00:47:57,240 --> 00:47:58,356
Someone took him.
866
00:47:59,240 --> 00:48:00,799
Neal:
Who would steal our dog?
867
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:04,832
You come back,
and then this happens.
868
00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:08,034
This is on you.
869
00:48:11,880 --> 00:48:14,031
(breathing uneasily)
870
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:28,671
- (alarm) Front door.
- (door slams)
871
00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:31,470
Tomorrow when you wake up
it's gonna be Christmas.
872
00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:33,836
And presents, and Ponce.
873
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:35,229
Okay?
874
00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:37,119
All right, I love you.
875
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,389
Try to sleep, and I'll be right back,
okay? I love you.
876
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:42,912
- Leave the light on.
- Of course I will.
877
00:48:57,240 --> 00:48:58,280
Holly: What are you doing?
878
00:48:58,360 --> 00:48:59,840
You aren't calling the cops, are you?
879
00:48:59,920 --> 00:49:00,920
I am.
880
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:03,238
No, Neal, no cops.
881
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:05,471
Not yet. Where is he?
882
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:06,756
Why wasn't the alarm on?
883
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:08,519
Because Ben was with us.
884
00:49:08,680 --> 00:49:12,390
He's the reason we got the alarm
in the first place. Where is he?
885
00:49:12,720 --> 00:49:13,949
He left.
886
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:21,316
(mouths) Go.
887
00:49:24,840 --> 00:49:25,840
Holly?
888
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:29,670
Holly?
889
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:31,555
(front door slams)
890
00:49:38,600 --> 00:49:40,478
Holly: Jesus. Ben?
891
00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:43,156
Ben?
892
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:46,440
Every fucking thing I do
turns to shit.
893
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:47,559
No, honey.
894
00:49:47,561 --> 00:49:50,598
No, no matter how hard I try
everything just turns to shit!
895
00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:51,995
Please, just get in the car.
896
00:49:52,160 --> 00:49:54,117
- I didn't do it.
- Obviously.
897
00:49:54,280 --> 00:49:56,272
But I'm the reason that somebody did.
898
00:49:56,800 --> 00:50:01,113
I put you in danger.
I put my family in danger.
899
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:04,557
And I should have known.
I'm so stupid.
900
00:50:04,720 --> 00:50:07,189
No, you're not.
Please get in the car.
901
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:10,000
Jesus.
902
00:50:10,080 --> 00:50:13,152
Where are you going? Ben?
903
00:50:14,040 --> 00:50:16,032
- Will you stop?
- I have to fix it.
904
00:50:16,240 --> 00:50:17,833
I have to fix it. I gotta find Ponce.
905
00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:19,229
Okay, well, just think.
906
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:21,551
- I am, God damnit.
- What?
907
00:50:23,680 --> 00:50:26,832
You don't understand. There are
so many people that it could be.
908
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:33,669
All right, well, we'll just take it
one asshole at a time.
909
00:50:35,240 --> 00:50:36,640
Now get in the car.
910
00:50:45,280 --> 00:50:46,634
Seatbelt.
911
00:50:58,200 --> 00:50:59,998
Ben: No, don't turn here,
don't turn on Elm.
912
00:51:03,080 --> 00:51:04,230
Not Pleasant.
913
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:06,477
All right,
just tell me where to turn.
914
00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:09,516
- Tell me where.
- Fuck.
915
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:12,320
- What?
- I used there.
916
00:51:22,040 --> 00:51:24,271
I robbed someone there. I...
917
00:51:38,840 --> 00:51:40,433
- Holly: This place?
- Ben: Yeah.
918
00:51:40,600 --> 00:51:42,512
- Holly: What's here?
- You cannot ask.
919
00:51:42,680 --> 00:51:45,798
Mom, if we're...
if we're doing this together...
920
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:47,880
you cannot ask.
921
00:51:48,000 --> 00:51:49,354
Okay. I won't ask.
922
00:51:50,800 --> 00:51:52,359
No, Mom.
923
00:51:56,480 --> 00:51:58,153
But I'm not letting you
out of my sight.
924
00:51:58,320 --> 00:51:59,680
You won't have to. Just stay here.
925
00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:21,951
(opera music in background)
926
00:52:22,920 --> 00:52:23,990
Well.
927
00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:28,199
It's about time. Come in.
928
00:52:28,960 --> 00:52:30,952
(indistinct chatter)
929
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:41,229
Ben: Did you take my dog?
930
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:55,596
No luck.
931
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:57,160
Who was that?
932
00:52:57,360 --> 00:52:58,555
Mom, we had a deal.
933
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:00,480
Let's go.
934
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:11,280
- I recognize him.
- Mom?
935
00:53:11,440 --> 00:53:12,840
I know I know him.
936
00:53:15,360 --> 00:53:17,317
God, he looks so familiar.
937
00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:19,355
Mr. Richmond.
938
00:53:19,680 --> 00:53:21,319
- Your history teacher?
- Yeah.
939
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:29,834
His mother had cancer, hospice.
940
00:53:30,840 --> 00:53:33,719
He had lots of oxi, jars full,
an endless supply.
941
00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:37,914
We had an arrangement.
942
00:53:43,720 --> 00:53:45,871
Oh, God. Oh, my God.
943
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:49,116
(car honks)
944
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:50,953
Oh, that piece of shit.
945
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:54,156
(retches)
946
00:53:55,160 --> 00:53:56,719
(vomits)
947
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:00,879
(coughs, vomits)
948
00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:16,238
Mom, we've gotta keep going.
949
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:55,598
Ben: I think it's...
950
00:54:57,680 --> 00:54:58,680
What's here?
951
00:54:58,760 --> 00:55:01,116
Maggie's dad lives in one of these.
952
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:05,359
Why would he take Ponce?
953
00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:07,960
Who hates me more?
954
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:17,674
Ben: It's one of these.
955
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:33,350
That's him.
956
00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:42,070
No Ponce.
957
00:55:51,880 --> 00:55:53,314
Heartbreaking, that.
958
00:55:55,440 --> 00:55:57,193
Sometimes it catches.
959
00:55:58,760 --> 00:56:00,760
- Holly: Let me. It can be tricky.
- Ben: I got it.
960
00:56:01,600 --> 00:56:04,320
- Just, you're being too herky jerky.
- I'm not being herky jerky.
961
00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:06,517
Sweetie, I'm not criticizing you.
I'm just saying.
962
00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:08,256
- Mom, I know how to, okay...
- I don't...
963
00:56:08,280 --> 00:56:10,736
- I know how to put on a seatbelt.
- Apparently not this exact...
964
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:13,195
- Holy...!
- (screaming) Oh my god!
965
00:56:13,360 --> 00:56:16,319
What the fuck you doing here?! Huh?!
966
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:18,358
(screaming)
You fucking junkie piece of shit!
967
00:56:18,560 --> 00:56:20,631
- Get the fuck out!
- Holly: What the fuck?!
968
00:56:20,960 --> 00:56:22,952
(tires screeching)
969
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:27,798
(phone ringing)
970
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:29,997
Holly: We are going to have to
talk about this.
971
00:56:30,160 --> 00:56:31,400
I mean, I get to ask questions.
972
00:56:31,440 --> 00:56:32,440
I get...
973
00:56:33,600 --> 00:56:35,876
I'm gonna have to explain
the window to Neal.
974
00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,511
He tried to bash in my head,
and he should.
975
00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:40,799
Don't say that.
976
00:56:40,801 --> 00:56:43,793
If you were him
you'd want me dead for what I did.
977
00:56:44,000 --> 00:56:46,176
All right, well then, you're gonna
have to help me here.
978
00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:47,520
What did you do?
979
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:57,039
(siren wailing)
980
00:56:59,120 --> 00:57:01,589
(indistinct chatter)
981
00:57:06,080 --> 00:57:07,400
Who are we looking for?
982
00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:09,353
We'll know when I know.
983
00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:13,360
Thank you.
984
00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:26,039
I got Maggie hooked.
985
00:57:34,800 --> 00:57:37,031
I told her how great it was.
986
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:41,676
Did you tie her down
and stick a needle in her arm?
987
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:42,956
No, but...
988
00:57:43,120 --> 00:57:47,751
And at that time didn't you think
it was the best thing ever?
989
00:57:49,760 --> 00:57:51,194
Then you told her the truth.
990
00:57:51,800 --> 00:57:54,474
At that time that was your truth.
991
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:56,436
But it was wrong.
992
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:58,520
Didn't you just want her to be happy?
993
00:58:00,600 --> 00:58:01,750
This is so twisted.
994
00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:03,914
Well, what did you want her to feel?
995
00:58:06,560 --> 00:58:08,200
(whispers)
Do you hear yourself right now?
996
00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:10,596
What did you want her to feel?
997
00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:19,070
Safe.
998
00:58:22,000 --> 00:58:23,000
Loved.
999
00:58:23,360 --> 00:58:25,352
Alive. Whole.
1000
00:58:28,440 --> 00:58:29,920
Something that nobody,
1001
00:58:31,040 --> 00:58:34,192
not even you,
could ever make me feel.
1002
00:58:40,000 --> 00:58:41,036
Okay.
1003
00:58:45,000 --> 00:58:46,480
You know what you did wrong.
1004
00:58:48,600 --> 00:58:51,069
You lived, and she didn't.
1005
00:58:52,440 --> 00:58:53,590
And we'll never know why.
1006
00:58:55,760 --> 00:58:56,989
It should have been me.
1007
00:58:58,040 --> 00:58:59,040
No.
1008
00:59:00,720 --> 00:59:02,234
You ready to order?
1009
00:59:03,800 --> 00:59:07,157
Yes. I will have your soup
of the day, a cup.
1010
00:59:14,480 --> 00:59:15,960
Hi, honey. I was about to call you.
1011
00:59:16,120 --> 00:59:18,396
Neal: I'm going out of my mind.
Where are you?
1012
00:59:20,240 --> 00:59:21,754
I'm with Ben.
1013
00:59:21,920 --> 00:59:23,639
It took me a while to find him.
1014
00:59:23,800 --> 00:59:25,359
But I did, and...
1015
00:59:25,880 --> 00:59:27,030
we're just getting a bite.
1016
00:59:27,200 --> 00:59:28,200
Lacey: Daddy?
1017
00:59:28,240 --> 00:59:29,456
We're supposed to be a united front.
1018
00:59:29,480 --> 00:59:31,870
We are, you just have to trust me.
1019
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:35,033
You're making it very hard.
You need to come home.
1020
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:36,554
Not without Ponce.
1021
00:59:37,120 --> 00:59:39,476
Those kids are waking up
with their dog.
1022
00:59:40,280 --> 00:59:44,240
And there's no need for cops
because we've got this, Ben and I.
1023
00:59:44,400 --> 00:59:46,278
- Don't we Ben?
- Neal: You got this.
1024
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:48,791
You and the drug addict,
you got this.
1025
00:59:48,960 --> 00:59:50,314
- Daddy?
- Please.
1026
00:59:51,200 --> 00:59:52,200
Baby.
1027
00:59:52,960 --> 00:59:54,235
Here's an idea, Neal.
1028
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:57,956
Why don't you take care of our kids,
and I'll deal with mine.
1029
00:59:59,560 --> 01:00:00,755
Neal: I will do that.
1030
01:00:02,920 --> 01:00:03,920
Neal.
1031
01:00:10,560 --> 01:00:11,560
What?
1032
01:00:12,280 --> 01:00:13,396
He's a bit of a dick.
1033
01:00:14,520 --> 01:00:15,520
Wow.
1034
01:00:15,600 --> 01:00:17,239
- Were you just complaining?
- No.
1035
01:00:17,400 --> 01:00:20,074
I can think or say about him
1036
01:00:20,960 --> 01:00:22,758
whatever I want
because he's my husband,
1037
01:00:22,920 --> 01:00:24,559
and I love him, but you,
1038
01:00:25,480 --> 01:00:27,199
God, you clearly don't get it.
1039
01:00:27,880 --> 01:00:31,760
You're here,
and without Neal, you wouldn't be.
1040
01:00:32,800 --> 01:00:35,031
- Don't be so sure.
- How many rehabs is it now?
1041
01:00:35,200 --> 01:00:37,954
I couldn't have paid for it.
Insurance won't anymore.
1042
01:00:38,120 --> 01:00:39,839
The government doesn't give a fuck.
1043
01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:42,231
And heaven help you, if you're poor,
1044
01:00:42,400 --> 01:00:44,960
which, because of Neal,
we aren't anymore.
1045
01:00:46,160 --> 01:00:47,879
He took out a second mortgage
on the house
1046
01:00:48,080 --> 01:00:49,480
to pay for you this time.
1047
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,517
Only thing you should say about Neal
is "thank you".
1048
01:00:55,560 --> 01:00:56,710
woman:
No way, Mac.
1049
01:00:56,920 --> 01:00:57,920
Go!
1050
01:00:58,080 --> 01:00:59,992
- Relax.
- No. I'm not relaxing. Go.
1051
01:01:00,160 --> 01:01:02,038
- I said get out.
- Holly: What is it?
1052
01:01:02,840 --> 01:01:04,513
Oh, shit.
1053
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:06,672
(yelling)
1054
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:10,799
(grunting)
1055
01:01:25,240 --> 01:01:26,515
Who did you tell?
1056
01:01:26,800 --> 01:01:28,280
- About what?
- That I'm back.
1057
01:01:28,440 --> 01:01:30,320
- Everybody knows you're back.
- Because of you.
1058
01:01:30,800 --> 01:01:32,598
Where's my dog? Who took my dog?
1059
01:01:32,760 --> 01:01:34,752
So you can steal other people's shit
all you want?
1060
01:01:34,960 --> 01:01:36,679
When someone steals yours
you get all holy?
1061
01:01:37,720 --> 01:01:39,598
Okay. Was it Tommy?
1062
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:41,070
No.
1063
01:01:41,240 --> 01:01:42,356
Is it Baumgartner?
1064
01:01:42,520 --> 01:01:44,477
- Jail.
- Was it Clayton?
1065
01:01:46,840 --> 01:01:48,479
(grunting)
1066
01:01:49,320 --> 01:01:50,879
(heavy breathing)
1067
01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:53,756
Who's that?
1068
01:01:55,680 --> 01:01:56,716
My mom.
1069
01:01:58,400 --> 01:02:01,040
Oh, hey, Mrs. B. Long time.
1070
01:02:02,520 --> 01:02:03,520
Spencer.
1071
01:02:04,000 --> 01:02:07,072
I go by Spider now, Mrs. B.
It feels more like me.
1072
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:09,520
You look terrible.
1073
01:02:11,720 --> 01:02:13,757
You always say it like it is, Mrs. B.
1074
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:17,919
- (grunts)
- Oh, my God!
1075
01:02:18,880 --> 01:02:19,916
I'm sorry, Mrs. B.
1076
01:02:34,120 --> 01:02:36,510
- Ah, God, that little shit.
- It's okay.
1077
01:02:36,680 --> 01:02:38,831
- I'm just helping. Okay.
- It's not helping.
1078
01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:42,040
I know who has Ponce.
1079
01:02:43,600 --> 01:02:45,353
- That's great. That's something.
- No.
1080
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:47,716
It's the person I hoped
it wouldn't be.
1081
01:02:57,240 --> 01:02:58,993
It's gonna take more.
1082
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:01,913
That's my daily limit.
1083
01:03:02,400 --> 01:03:03,993
I can write a check.
1084
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:07,432
These aren't check people, are they?
1085
01:03:08,160 --> 01:03:09,196
No.
1086
01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:15,115
Take this.
1087
01:03:17,400 --> 01:03:18,754
It's worth a lot.
1088
01:03:19,800 --> 01:03:21,154
It's just a thing.
1089
01:03:25,360 --> 01:03:26,589
I'm sorry.
1090
01:03:28,960 --> 01:03:30,189
I never liked it.
1091
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:39,790
Ben:
Turn your lights off.
1092
01:03:41,920 --> 01:03:43,136
Holly: All right let's,
you know what?
1093
01:03:43,160 --> 01:03:44,719
Let's just turn right around.
1094
01:03:44,920 --> 01:03:47,799
Because Ponce was a rescue.
And we had a good run.
1095
01:03:47,960 --> 01:03:50,919
- You did not just say that.
- Yes, I did. Ponce is just a dog.
1096
01:03:51,080 --> 01:03:53,914
I love five people
and Ponce is two of them.
1097
01:03:54,080 --> 01:03:56,993
Okay, well, he is a pee in the house,
crap on the carpet dog.
1098
01:03:57,160 --> 01:03:58,160
And you are so much more.
1099
01:03:58,240 --> 01:04:00,436
Fuck, what are we doing?
This is madness.
1100
01:04:00,600 --> 01:04:02,398
No, this is manageable.
1101
01:04:02,560 --> 01:04:04,631
It's Clayton. We go way back.
1102
01:04:04,800 --> 01:04:06,757
I'll pay up
and maybe we'll have a good laugh.
1103
01:04:06,920 --> 01:04:07,920
You don't believe that.
1104
01:04:08,040 --> 01:04:10,999
If I don't deal with this
then it could be worst next time
1105
01:04:11,280 --> 01:04:12,600
for you and the family.
1106
01:04:16,240 --> 01:04:17,240
Okay.
1107
01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:20,433
You go in, pay the man,
get Ponce and get right back out.
1108
01:04:23,560 --> 01:04:24,676
You're coming out.
1109
01:04:25,320 --> 01:04:26,720
Yeah, I'm coming out.
1110
01:04:27,920 --> 01:04:30,958
(rap music coming from house)
1111
01:04:31,320 --> 01:04:32,549
Be careful.
1112
01:04:33,200 --> 01:04:34,200
(car door closes)
1113
01:04:37,080 --> 01:04:38,799
Lock the door.
1114
01:04:39,600 --> 01:04:40,716
(doors lock)
1115
01:05:17,160 --> 01:05:19,436
(rap music stops)
1116
01:05:26,320 --> 01:05:27,560
Holly: (whispers) Just be calm.
1117
01:05:29,240 --> 01:05:31,880
(sighs)
I can't be calm. Just go in.
1118
01:05:55,400 --> 01:05:57,471
(dials two digits)
1119
01:05:58,800 --> 01:06:00,314
- (whispering) Mom?
- Oh, my God.
1120
01:06:00,480 --> 01:06:02,711
- What are you doing? Get over here.
- Oh, my God.
1121
01:06:04,000 --> 01:06:05,275
What happened? Where's Ponce?
1122
01:06:05,480 --> 01:06:07,199
I got in and out.
That's the good news.
1123
01:06:07,400 --> 01:06:09,056
- (rap music starts back up)
- So what's the bad?
1124
01:06:09,080 --> 01:06:11,136
I just need you to drive, okay?
Let me do the thinking.
1125
01:06:11,160 --> 01:06:12,160
Okay.
1126
01:06:13,320 --> 01:06:14,356
Holly: Oh, Jesus.
1127
01:06:20,440 --> 01:06:21,440
(engine stalls)
1128
01:06:21,560 --> 01:06:22,630
Oh, my God.
1129
01:06:23,920 --> 01:06:25,877
Easy, Mom.
1130
01:06:26,080 --> 01:06:27,336
- You're trying too hard.
- Okay.
1131
01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:28,760
Of course, I am. It's what I do.
1132
01:06:29,000 --> 01:06:30,400
(engine sputtering)
1133
01:06:30,600 --> 01:06:33,240
Stop, you're flooding the engine.
You got to give it a rest.
1134
01:06:33,400 --> 01:06:34,550
Oh. Sorry.
1135
01:06:35,040 --> 01:06:36,952
Clayton doesn't deal
out of here anymore.
1136
01:06:37,120 --> 01:06:39,919
He's gone up the chain
and he's not happy with me.
1137
01:06:40,080 --> 01:06:41,080
Oh, my God.
1138
01:06:41,160 --> 01:06:43,197
But I got a plan,
so I need you to listen to me.
1139
01:06:43,360 --> 01:06:45,296
I can't help but think
if I hadn't left your dad...
1140
01:06:45,320 --> 01:06:47,630
- He left us. Please listen to me.
- You took it so hard.
1141
01:06:47,800 --> 01:06:49,234
- You blamed yourself.
- Just stop.
1142
01:06:49,440 --> 01:06:52,000
- It was something... It changed you.
- Stop. Move over.
1143
01:06:56,560 --> 01:06:58,233
A boy needs a dad.
1144
01:06:59,760 --> 01:07:01,114
A boy needs a dad.
1145
01:07:01,280 --> 01:07:04,079
- Mom...
- No, that's what you needed.
1146
01:07:04,360 --> 01:07:05,396
Not that dad.
1147
01:07:06,600 --> 01:07:08,114
(engine starts)
1148
01:07:09,120 --> 01:07:10,759
Fuck, we need gas.
1149
01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:14,872
Holly:
You tried so hard to keep me happy.
1150
01:07:15,040 --> 01:07:17,509
And what kid wouldn't crack
under the weight of that?
1151
01:07:17,720 --> 01:07:18,720
Mom?
1152
01:07:20,720 --> 01:07:22,598
What? What is it?
1153
01:07:37,080 --> 01:07:38,230
You need to go home.
1154
01:07:39,200 --> 01:07:41,200
- Not without you.
- You cannot go where I'm going.
1155
01:07:41,360 --> 01:07:43,750
- It's not safe.
- Then I'm definitely going.
1156
01:07:43,920 --> 01:07:45,912
No. Go home.
1157
01:07:46,120 --> 01:07:48,840
- I'll be there soon.
- No, I don't believe you.
1158
01:07:49,040 --> 01:07:50,997
Okay, so now you don't believe me.
1159
01:07:51,160 --> 01:07:52,160
No, I don't.
1160
01:07:52,480 --> 01:07:54,995
Mom, you don't know
what you're doing.
1161
01:07:55,160 --> 01:07:56,840
- I do.
- You don't know what you're doing.
1162
01:07:57,040 --> 01:07:58,360
I'm not worth it.
1163
01:07:59,120 --> 01:08:00,793
If you knew me,
you'd be done with me.
1164
01:08:00,960 --> 01:08:01,960
No, I wouldn't.
1165
01:08:01,962 --> 01:08:03,076
- And I know you.
- No.
1166
01:08:03,240 --> 01:08:05,277
- I know you.
- You don't, Mom, you don't know me.
1167
01:08:05,440 --> 01:08:06,590
You don't.
1168
01:08:07,520 --> 01:08:09,830
My sponsor told me not to come back.
1169
01:08:11,080 --> 01:08:12,753
He said it was a shit idea,
1170
01:08:12,920 --> 01:08:14,240
that I was not ready.
1171
01:08:14,720 --> 01:08:16,871
- That's not true.
- Yes, it is, it is true.
1172
01:08:17,040 --> 01:08:18,793
And I didn't get the drugs
from the girl.
1173
01:08:19,280 --> 01:08:23,832
They were in the attic
above Liam and Lacey's room.
1174
01:08:24,120 --> 01:08:27,238
And within an hour of coming home
they were in my pocket.
1175
01:08:31,360 --> 01:08:34,478
I told you not to believe me,
and you didn't fucking listen!
1176
01:08:36,640 --> 01:08:40,077
I mean, I could go on.
Do you want me to go on?
1177
01:08:40,240 --> 01:08:42,391
There's so much more.
I killed Maggie.
1178
01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:44,040
- It's not your...
- I killed Maggie.
1179
01:08:44,200 --> 01:08:45,429
It's not working.
1180
01:08:46,920 --> 01:08:48,752
Oh, please go home.
1181
01:08:49,160 --> 01:08:51,595
You have to go home, please.
1182
01:08:52,080 --> 01:08:55,312
Please, I'm not worth it.
Please go home.
1183
01:08:55,520 --> 01:08:57,352
I will not leave you.
1184
01:08:59,200 --> 01:09:00,316
Ugh.
1185
01:09:06,560 --> 01:09:08,279
(Ben exhales slowly)
1186
01:09:29,240 --> 01:09:30,879
Get whatever you want.
1187
01:09:39,000 --> 01:09:42,277
woman: I know you are not open,
so you have a merry Christmas.
1188
01:09:42,440 --> 01:09:43,440
man: You too.
1189
01:09:43,520 --> 01:09:45,876
Can you get me that blue drink
I really like?
1190
01:09:46,040 --> 01:09:47,190
Yeah.
1191
01:09:48,920 --> 01:09:49,956
Mom?
1192
01:09:50,520 --> 01:09:51,715
You're the best.
1193
01:09:57,440 --> 01:10:00,239
So just these two and one more.
1194
01:10:03,640 --> 01:10:04,710
Honey, which one is it?
1195
01:10:04,880 --> 01:10:07,520
Because there is more
than one choice.
1196
01:10:08,120 --> 01:10:09,520
(engine revs)
1197
01:10:12,760 --> 01:10:13,760
Ben?
1198
01:10:29,800 --> 01:10:31,757
(voicemail)
Hey, it's Ben. You know what to do.
1199
01:10:32,880 --> 01:10:34,473
No, I don't, Ben.
1200
01:10:34,640 --> 01:10:38,759
I don't know what to do. (screaming)
Get fucking back here right now!
1201
01:10:44,320 --> 01:10:45,470
(screams)
1202
01:11:14,960 --> 01:11:16,076
I'm sorry.
1203
01:11:19,720 --> 01:11:23,509
I didn't know where else to go.
He took my car.
1204
01:11:26,000 --> 01:11:28,231
And he's gone somewhere
and I don't know what to do.
1205
01:11:32,200 --> 01:11:33,919
Come in.
1206
01:11:41,560 --> 01:11:44,075
I can't tell my husband,
he'll call the cops.
1207
01:11:45,320 --> 01:11:48,711
Someone took our dog, and Ben's
just out trying to find our dog.
1208
01:11:49,680 --> 01:11:51,160
Come on, Holly.
1209
01:11:51,800 --> 01:11:52,995
He's an addict.
1210
01:11:53,560 --> 01:11:54,789
And he's out there.
1211
01:12:01,640 --> 01:12:02,790
Stay put.
1212
01:12:13,920 --> 01:12:18,437
(cabinets opening and closing)
1213
01:12:22,120 --> 01:12:24,476
Holly, you'll need to listen closely.
1214
01:12:26,320 --> 01:12:28,789
It has a shelf life
of 18 to 24 months.
1215
01:12:28,960 --> 01:12:31,839
And it's been over two years
but it should be strong enough,
1216
01:12:32,000 --> 01:12:33,559
if it's the only kit available.
1217
01:12:33,880 --> 01:12:36,440
I'm such a smug bitch,
never thought I'd need this.
1218
01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:39,991
First you pull off the yellow caps.
1219
01:12:40,640 --> 01:12:42,120
You screw in the applicator tip.
1220
01:12:43,040 --> 01:12:45,077
You take off this cap
and insert it here.
1221
01:12:45,920 --> 01:12:47,354
Half a dose in each nostril.
1222
01:12:48,320 --> 01:12:52,758
I can't... what I'm doing.
If you couldn't save Maggie...
1223
01:12:52,920 --> 01:12:54,036
We can't save them.
1224
01:12:57,280 --> 01:12:59,158
But you'll hate yourself
if you don't try.
1225
01:13:03,640 --> 01:13:04,790
(zips case)
1226
01:13:08,880 --> 01:13:10,951
(keys jangle)
1227
01:13:12,880 --> 01:13:13,916
Go find him.
1228
01:14:15,480 --> 01:14:17,392
Now it's starting to feel
like Christmas.
1229
01:14:20,400 --> 01:14:21,400
Here.
1230
01:14:25,600 --> 01:14:27,034
This is my mom's.
1231
01:14:28,600 --> 01:14:29,716
And it's worth a lot.
1232
01:14:35,080 --> 01:14:37,117
I'm good for the rest,
and I'll make it right.
1233
01:14:41,800 --> 01:14:43,154
Oh, well...
1234
01:14:44,400 --> 01:14:46,471
it's not just about the money, Burns.
1235
01:14:48,720 --> 01:14:50,871
I mean, I had big plans for you,
you were my guy.
1236
01:14:52,840 --> 01:14:54,354
- I know.
- (dog barks)
1237
01:15:01,920 --> 01:15:04,799
Look, just give me my dog back,
and leave my family out of this
1238
01:15:04,960 --> 01:15:06,280
because they didn't do anything.
1239
01:15:06,680 --> 01:15:08,273
I wish it were that easy.
1240
01:15:08,760 --> 01:15:09,760
It can be.
1241
01:15:15,440 --> 01:15:17,079
Fuck it, it's Christmas, right?
1242
01:15:21,480 --> 01:15:23,597
All right, come on, take this.
1243
01:15:26,640 --> 01:15:29,553
All I need is for you to do me
just one more little favor.
1244
01:15:33,480 --> 01:15:34,516
What's that?
1245
01:16:02,160 --> 01:16:03,840
woman:
Merry Christmas. How can I help you?
1246
01:16:03,880 --> 01:16:06,873
So I have this, and it's expired,
I need it replaced.
1247
01:16:09,600 --> 01:16:10,954
(phone dings)
1248
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:18,636
woman:
Excuse me ma'am.
1249
01:16:20,320 --> 01:16:22,516
Ma'am, we don't carry this.
1250
01:16:24,440 --> 01:16:25,920
What do you mean, you don't carry it?
1251
01:16:26,040 --> 01:16:27,440
You need to try another pharmacy.
1252
01:16:27,640 --> 01:16:30,553
No, you're the only one open.
What do you mean, you don't carry it?
1253
01:16:31,120 --> 01:16:33,954
It's our policy not to encourage
irresponsible behavior.
1254
01:16:35,640 --> 01:16:38,553
All right, well then why don't you
discontinue the oxi's,
1255
01:16:38,720 --> 01:16:42,839
the Perc 30's and the Benzo Cheerios,
or whatever you call them?
1256
01:16:43,040 --> 01:16:44,736
If you'd like to file a complaint
there is...
1257
01:16:44,760 --> 01:16:46,558
I'm fucking filing one!
1258
01:16:48,560 --> 01:16:50,233
God, fucking damnit.
1259
01:17:03,040 --> 01:17:05,111
(phone rings)
1260
01:17:14,440 --> 01:17:16,591
(phone continues ringing)
1261
01:17:25,200 --> 01:17:28,989
(engine revs, tires squeal)
1262
01:17:39,960 --> 01:17:41,519
(tires squeal)
1263
01:17:41,680 --> 01:17:43,592
(train horn blares)
1264
01:18:05,800 --> 01:18:07,029
Spare some change.
1265
01:18:17,760 --> 01:18:20,195
Mrs. B, I'm not gonna hurt you.
1266
01:18:20,560 --> 01:18:23,155
I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm too sick.
1267
01:18:24,640 --> 01:18:25,640
Spencer...
1268
01:18:26,160 --> 01:18:27,230
get in the car.
1269
01:18:33,200 --> 01:18:34,236
Where is he?
1270
01:18:35,200 --> 01:18:39,513
I'm sorry, Mrs. B. I'm not...
I'm not doing my best thinking.
1271
01:18:40,360 --> 01:18:41,714
I need to get well.
1272
01:18:42,160 --> 01:18:43,389
You mean get high.
1273
01:18:43,680 --> 01:18:44,750
Fuck.
1274
01:18:44,920 --> 01:18:46,479
There's no high anymore.
1275
01:18:46,760 --> 01:18:49,195
I just don't want,
I just don't want to be sick.
1276
01:18:49,720 --> 01:18:51,632
Help me.
1277
01:18:52,080 --> 01:18:54,197
I just need a little money.
1278
01:18:54,800 --> 01:18:57,838
Okay, I will help you,
but you have to help me.
1279
01:18:59,080 --> 01:19:00,673
Where can I find him?
1280
01:19:00,880 --> 01:19:02,473
He used to run for Clayton.
1281
01:19:04,040 --> 01:19:05,793
You don't leave Clayton.
1282
01:19:06,840 --> 01:19:08,559
That's where Ben went. Shit.
1283
01:19:10,000 --> 01:19:11,354
I just snitched.
1284
01:19:11,520 --> 01:19:13,398
I need more.
Tell me everything you know.
1285
01:19:13,920 --> 01:19:15,195
I can't.
1286
01:19:24,480 --> 01:19:25,480
You can.
1287
01:19:29,320 --> 01:19:30,834
- Where is he?
- Okay.
1288
01:19:32,680 --> 01:19:35,639
Go to the pawn shop,
across the bridge.
1289
01:19:37,120 --> 01:19:39,840
It's Yonkers. Ask around.
1290
01:19:40,240 --> 01:19:42,311
And that's all I can tell you,
Mrs. B.
1291
01:19:42,680 --> 01:19:44,512
Anything else and they kill me.
1292
01:19:47,160 --> 01:19:49,038
You said you'd help me get well.
1293
01:19:52,360 --> 01:19:55,432
Your mother and I were friends
when you and Ben were babies.
1294
01:19:55,640 --> 01:19:57,916
I changed your diaper.
This is so fucked.
1295
01:19:58,080 --> 01:19:59,560
Yeah, Mrs. B, it is.
1296
01:20:00,320 --> 01:20:03,199
Call your mother,
and tell her that you're not dead.
1297
01:20:25,000 --> 01:20:27,674
Are you okay?
Just tell me you're okay.
1298
01:20:27,880 --> 01:20:29,712
Holly:
You need to be calm.
1299
01:20:30,040 --> 01:20:32,475
- Neal: I'm calm. Are you okay?
- Yep.
1300
01:20:32,680 --> 01:20:34,512
We are on it.
1301
01:20:35,520 --> 01:20:38,718
Just totally safe and closing in.
1302
01:20:40,240 --> 01:20:41,240
Is that my mom?
1303
01:20:41,360 --> 01:20:43,113
Where are you
'cause I'm coming to get you.
1304
01:20:43,280 --> 01:20:44,600
No, Neal.
1305
01:20:44,960 --> 01:20:47,077
- Is that my mom?
- Okay, yes, it is.
1306
01:20:47,240 --> 01:20:48,560
Holly:
Can I please talk to her?
1307
01:20:48,920 --> 01:20:50,832
Yes you may. Hold on one second.
1308
01:20:52,440 --> 01:20:53,440
Mommy?
1309
01:21:04,560 --> 01:21:05,680
Holly:
You need to be in bed.
1310
01:21:05,880 --> 01:21:08,998
Ben and I have this under control,
and we will see you in the morning.
1311
01:21:10,240 --> 01:21:11,435
Why are you lying?
1312
01:21:12,440 --> 01:21:13,556
I'm not.
1313
01:21:14,760 --> 01:21:18,390
Mom, I'm the one
who set up the phones for everybody.
1314
01:21:18,920 --> 01:21:22,311
You're not with Ben.
Ben's in a whole other town.
1315
01:21:23,240 --> 01:21:24,959
And I've been calling you
and texting you,
1316
01:21:25,120 --> 01:21:26,793
and you won't pick up.
1317
01:21:26,960 --> 01:21:28,997
And I didn't tell Neal
because he'll call the cops.
1318
01:21:29,160 --> 01:21:33,393
But now I'm freaking out,
(whispers) because you lied to me.
1319
01:21:34,640 --> 01:21:37,200
We split up to cover more ground.
1320
01:21:39,240 --> 01:21:40,356
I don't believe you.
1321
01:21:40,520 --> 01:21:41,920
- (knocking)
- Neal: Ivy.
1322
01:21:42,120 --> 01:21:43,998
(whispers) What am I supposed to do?
1323
01:21:44,840 --> 01:21:46,480
All right, sweetheart,
you need to be calm
1324
01:21:46,640 --> 01:21:48,677
and hang up, deal with Neal.
1325
01:21:49,080 --> 01:21:52,198
Call me back as soon as you can
from your own phone, all right?
1326
01:21:53,840 --> 01:21:55,479
- Yeah?
- (knocking)
1327
01:21:55,680 --> 01:21:57,034
- Neal: Ivy.
- Okay.
1328
01:22:29,640 --> 01:22:31,472
(phone rings)
1329
01:22:32,040 --> 01:22:33,918
- Holly: Hi, honey.
- Ivy: Hi, mom.
1330
01:22:34,840 --> 01:22:36,880
Okay, I want you to help me
find your brother, yeah.
1331
01:22:37,000 --> 01:22:40,277
Keep going,
and if you turn left on Millwood...
1332
01:22:44,160 --> 01:22:45,389
Keep going straight.
1333
01:22:45,720 --> 01:22:48,110
And turn right on 23rd Street.
1334
01:22:48,960 --> 01:22:51,555
- Do you see that?
- This is 23rd Street, right, okay.
1335
01:22:54,280 --> 01:22:55,316
Okay, and...
1336
01:22:56,720 --> 01:22:58,393
just keep going straight for a bit.
1337
01:23:00,760 --> 01:23:02,240
You're doing great, Ivy.
1338
01:23:03,160 --> 01:23:04,753
You're getting really close.
1339
01:23:07,920 --> 01:23:09,434
Okay, turn before the intersection.
1340
01:23:09,600 --> 01:23:11,159
Mom, turn now.
1341
01:23:18,880 --> 01:23:20,792
You're really close. Do you see him?
1342
01:23:24,080 --> 01:23:25,080
Mom?
1343
01:23:26,680 --> 01:23:28,478
He should be right there.
1344
01:23:31,160 --> 01:23:32,435
I'm gonna call his phone.
1345
01:23:32,600 --> 01:23:33,829
Okay, good idea.
1346
01:23:35,200 --> 01:23:36,714
(phone rings)
1347
01:23:38,560 --> 01:23:39,880
Okay, it's ringing.
1348
01:23:44,360 --> 01:23:45,510
Do you hear it?
1349
01:23:45,880 --> 01:23:47,792
(phone keeps ringing)
1350
01:23:48,080 --> 01:23:49,594
I'll call you right back.
1351
01:23:49,960 --> 01:23:52,714
Don't hang up. No. Mom?
1352
01:23:55,680 --> 01:23:57,558
(phone keeps ringing)
1353
01:24:14,720 --> 01:24:15,790
I got him.
1354
01:24:16,320 --> 01:24:17,913
Okay. God.
1355
01:24:18,080 --> 01:24:20,276
So we're good, sweetie.
1356
01:24:20,840 --> 01:24:22,280
Can I just talk to him really quick?
1357
01:24:22,400 --> 01:24:23,436
We got to keep moving.
1358
01:24:23,600 --> 01:24:27,037
We're gonna be home so soon
with Ponce.
1359
01:24:28,320 --> 01:24:29,515
Let me talk to Ben.
1360
01:24:29,680 --> 01:24:31,353
No, we've got to keep moving, honey.
1361
01:24:31,520 --> 01:24:32,795
No. Mom.
1362
01:24:33,000 --> 01:24:36,311
Sweetie, listen.
I just... I need you to go to sleep.
1363
01:24:38,160 --> 01:24:39,958
I can tell there's something wrong.
1364
01:24:40,120 --> 01:24:42,396
Everything's gonna be okay.
I just... trust me.
1365
01:24:43,880 --> 01:24:44,950
(crying) Mom.
1366
01:24:45,200 --> 01:24:46,395
Okay, sweetie.
1367
01:24:47,120 --> 01:24:48,759
Okay, go to sleep.
1368
01:25:04,240 --> 01:25:05,515
(sirens wail in the distance)
1369
01:25:05,680 --> 01:25:06,955
Excuse me.
1370
01:25:08,880 --> 01:25:10,234
Excuse me.
1371
01:25:11,240 --> 01:25:12,674
I'm looking for my son.
1372
01:25:14,680 --> 01:25:16,558
His name is Ben.
I know he was just here.
1373
01:25:21,360 --> 01:25:22,635
Over by the river.
1374
01:25:24,680 --> 01:25:26,239
That's where they all end up.
1375
01:25:47,600 --> 01:25:49,512
(man yelling, grunting)
1376
01:25:54,840 --> 01:25:58,550
(train horn blaring)
1377
01:26:05,600 --> 01:26:07,398
(coughing)
1378
01:26:19,560 --> 01:26:20,560
Ben?
1379
01:26:23,600 --> 01:26:24,670
Ben?
1380
01:26:38,760 --> 01:26:41,070
(aluminum foil crackling)
1381
01:26:51,160 --> 01:26:53,072
Mmm. You did good.
1382
01:26:53,840 --> 01:26:55,200
(laughs) Wayne, he did good right?
1383
01:26:56,760 --> 01:26:58,479
You made a lot of people happy today.
1384
01:27:03,320 --> 01:27:06,597
- For all your hard work.
- Just give me my dog, man.
1385
01:27:27,200 --> 01:27:30,159
(train rumbling)
1386
01:27:37,520 --> 01:27:39,432
(birds cawing)
1387
01:27:50,400 --> 01:27:52,039
(phone rings)
1388
01:27:54,160 --> 01:27:55,160
Holly?
1389
01:27:55,760 --> 01:27:57,717
- Holly?
- Holly: I lost him.
1390
01:27:58,640 --> 01:27:59,676
What?
1391
01:28:01,160 --> 01:28:04,756
I didn't wanna tell you.
I've been... lying to you.
1392
01:28:08,480 --> 01:28:11,279
I looked everywhere
and I can't find him and...
1393
01:28:13,920 --> 01:28:15,149
I tried.
1394
01:28:16,320 --> 01:28:18,516
(Holly sniffles, cries)
1395
01:28:19,720 --> 01:28:20,995
I know you did.
1396
01:28:21,840 --> 01:28:23,797
I lost him a long time ago, I just...
1397
01:28:25,840 --> 01:28:29,117
I don't know where to look,
and I'm so tired.
1398
01:28:30,400 --> 01:28:31,629
I don't know what to do.
1399
01:28:33,360 --> 01:28:36,080
Neal: Tell me where you are,
I'm coming to get you,
1400
01:28:36,400 --> 01:28:37,914
and we'll find him together.
1401
01:28:43,280 --> 01:28:44,555
I'm coming home.
1402
01:28:47,560 --> 01:28:48,960
I'm just gonna come home.
1403
01:29:01,280 --> 01:29:02,350
Hey, boy.
1404
01:29:02,880 --> 01:29:04,109
Hey, Ponce.
1405
01:29:07,160 --> 01:29:09,436
(Ponce whines softly)
1406
01:29:22,520 --> 01:29:24,000
(sighs)
1407
01:29:28,000 --> 01:29:29,400
(snickers)
1408
01:30:30,760 --> 01:30:31,876
woman: Anything else?
1409
01:30:47,640 --> 01:30:49,040
(tires squeal)
1410
01:31:00,120 --> 01:31:02,999
(car horn blares)
1411
01:31:05,000 --> 01:31:06,229
(whispers) Here, boy.
1412
01:32:01,040 --> 01:32:04,670
- Excuse me. I need help, please.
- Ma'am, you need to wait your turn.
1413
01:32:04,840 --> 01:32:07,878
I can't wait my turn.
He's my son, he's not a bad kid.
1414
01:32:08,080 --> 01:32:12,120
No, I can't, there's no time for that
right now. He stole my car.
1415
01:32:13,000 --> 01:32:15,200
- Please, excuse me, sir...
- Ma'am, hold on one second.
1416
01:32:15,320 --> 01:32:17,994
- Can you find?
- Hello, hold on one second.
1417
01:32:18,160 --> 01:32:20,755
Ma'am, stand in line.
We will be able to help you.
1418
01:32:20,920 --> 01:32:23,355
I just need you to please find my son
1419
01:32:23,520 --> 01:32:26,354
and arrest him, I'm begging you!
1420
01:32:37,960 --> 01:32:40,350
woman: You just want to calm down
and have a seat.
1421
01:32:40,520 --> 01:32:42,193
- I'll start the paperwork.
- Thank you.
1422
01:32:49,000 --> 01:32:51,435
(phone rings)
1423
01:32:57,520 --> 01:32:58,840
Hello.
1424
01:33:24,600 --> 01:33:26,876
(Ponce barks)
1425
01:33:44,280 --> 01:33:46,670
Good boy.
1426
01:33:47,640 --> 01:33:49,233
Oh, my God.
1427
01:33:49,400 --> 01:33:50,720
Honey.
1428
01:33:52,000 --> 01:33:53,229
Wake up, Ben.
1429
01:33:53,520 --> 01:33:54,874
Wake up, honey.
1430
01:33:55,040 --> 01:33:56,315
Come on!
1431
01:33:59,200 --> 01:34:00,839
Okay, all right.
1432
01:34:01,280 --> 01:34:02,760
We've got this, okay.
1433
01:34:03,760 --> 01:34:04,876
All right.
1434
01:34:06,240 --> 01:34:07,993
(Ponce barks and whines)
1435
01:34:11,680 --> 01:34:13,751
Come on, hang in there.
Come back to me.
1436
01:34:13,960 --> 01:34:14,996
Come on.
1437
01:34:16,080 --> 01:34:17,230
Fuck.
1438
01:34:20,120 --> 01:34:21,349
Just stay with me.
1439
01:34:22,680 --> 01:34:23,716
God.
1440
01:34:24,640 --> 01:34:26,791
Okay. Okay.
1441
01:34:26,960 --> 01:34:28,474
Okay. Ready.
1442
01:34:33,960 --> 01:34:37,192
Okay. Wake up! Wake up!
1443
01:34:40,720 --> 01:34:41,836
Please.
1444
01:34:55,600 --> 01:34:57,956
Please come back.
1445
01:34:58,120 --> 01:35:00,430
Come back! Please come back!
1446
01:35:06,960 --> 01:35:08,519
Oh my boy, please!
1447
01:35:08,720 --> 01:35:10,518
Please, I know you can do this!
1448
01:35:17,760 --> 01:35:18,830
Ben.
1449
01:35:20,200 --> 01:35:22,317
My boy, please.
1450
01:35:25,760 --> 01:35:27,717
(Ben takes a breath)