Oh.
What?
Phew.
Ohh, oh.
My God.
Oh, what brought this one?
Well, I just felt like you needed to relax.
Oh, yeah, I'm relaxed now.
I'm just surprised.
Uh, just one second.
Okay. Okay.
Ah, shit.
I've got a pre-interview for the "BET News Special" down in SoHo.
Oh, come on.
That meeting's not till 9:00 o'clock.
Yeah, but I got to get to the tailor first.
Uh.Right -- right, right.
But I'm definitely gonna return the favor later tonight,
if you know what I mean.
You better.
I will.
Hazel!
Good morning.
No. Not a good morning.
I just had to wipe my ass with my nice towel.
Aren't you fancy.
No, I'm not fancy. Okay?
I ran out of toilet paper because you used it all.
Oh, my bad.
Is that my perfume?
Oh, yeah, it's nice. Where'd you get it?
I guess I don't have to wonder my sugar scrub
and DevaCurl disappeared to.
Oh, yeah, you need more of that.
We're out. Hazel, no.
Weare not out of it.
My house is not a Rite Aid, okay?
You really got to get your own stuff.
What's he big deal?
The big deal is that I have a lot on my plate right now, okay?
I have two kids.
I don't need a third.
Is this about the fruit snacks?
Because I thought they were for everybody.
It is about everything.
Okay?
You put your dishes right next to the dishwasher!
Literally right next to the dishwasher --
You don't even put them in.
You never help with laundry,
you haven't even offered to watch the kids for me.
I am not your maid.
I am your friend, and I'm going through a painful divorce.
Me too, bitch!
Look, Hazel, you can't stay here rent free
and not even help out a little bit.
I mean, with Gary gone, it's all piling up on me right now, okay?
And I can't do it alone.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
I will help out more around the house.
Thank you.
Can you just go to the store and get some toilet paper --
Can you put a pin in that?
Are you serious?
Yeah, hon, I got things to do.
I'll see you later.
Ooh!
Oh, my God. I should have worn my good bra.
Has he been moisturizing?
Oh, my God. Oh!
I am so sorry.
Let me just get this from you.
Okay. Enjoy your day.
Hey. Hey! You getting stuff for the party?
Huh?
Imani's birthday party tomorrow -- Are you --
Are you getting stuff? Oh!
Yeah, duh. No.
I'm just grocery shopping right now.
You know, just picking up extra toilet paper,
'cause you can never have enough.
I didn't run out.
Okay.
Um, well, if you need any help
with the party, just let me know.
No, I don't. I got it covered.
More than covered.
In fact it's gonna be the best birthday party
a child has ever had.
Really?
Best birthday party a child's ever had?
Yes. Yes. Okay.
All right. What about food?
My mother mentioned she'd be happy to cook.
So why are you making that face?
No, not necessary.
Just tell Doreen to bring herself.
If she wants to help me, she can bring back
my Crock-Pot and my Tupperware from Thanksgiving.
Gary, she's always holding on to my stuff.
You and the Crock-Pot.
You got to let the Crock-Pot go.
That Crock-Pot got us through grad school.
It did, it d-- You know what?
Your spicy chili -- that went hard for us.
That was your favorite.
Because it was spicy, but then it would hit you --
Here, babe. I got you the alkaline water,
because the electrolytes are so good after a hard workout.
Oh, uh, thank you. Thank you.
Um, Melissa, this is -- This is Bree.
My wife.
It's nice to meet you.
This is awkward. I'm so sorry.
No. No, it's not awkward.
Don't be sorry. I'm not sorry.
I was bound to meet the girlfriend,
so it's fine, you know?
I just wish I had time to put a comb to my hair,
because I just was so tired with work and the kids.
I'm a surgeon. I'm pretty smart.
I know -- I just don't know what Gary's told you.
And Imani's birthday. I'm so busy with that.
We're having a party for her tomorrow.
And, um, yeah, have you met Imani?
Has she met Imani?
I don't know if you met Imani. You know what?
You should just come to the birthday.
Just come to the birthday party!
Are you sure?
Yeeeees, I'm sure.
Come on, it'd be great.
You know, it's at our house tomorrow at noon.
Well, actually it's my house now,
because they're separated 'cause you guys are together.
So, yeah, you out here working out
looking like a black Kate Hudson,
looking like you need to teach
a SoulCycle class or something.
You earned yourself a piece of cake.
I can't wait.
Me, too.
Neither can I.
I'm gonna go now.
Yeah, I'm gonna go.
So nice to see you.
Nice to meet you.Nice to meet you.
I'll see you -- I want to get oranges anyways --
Bree, you didn't.
I know!
The bitch caught me off guard.
I need help. I need help.
Yes, you do. No.
I need help with the party, okay?
I haven't done a damn thing, and I hyped this party up to Gary,
and now he's gonna come, and he's gonna bring Melissa,
a-and I need to have a dope-ass party,
otherwise, I am screwed.
Okay, relax.
It's a kid's birthday party.
We got this -- What all you need?
A clown? A cake?
A princess? Girl, there is an app for that.
We can order all that shit right now.
Really? Yes.
That is amazing. That is amazing.
Can we also order a bounce house?
Because I promised Imani a bounce house.
Yes, honey, we can get you a bounce house.
Love those.Oh, my God, thank you, Ari.
Oh. This is the miracle I needed after the morning I had.
I mean, y'all should have seen this bitch.
She's everything I'm not wrapped up
in a super-extra-tight package
with thigh-gap-and -never-had-a-baby-
perfection.
Damn. Thigh gap.
I'm sorry, Bree. I know.
She's just skipping her happy ass over to Gary,
giving him pH balanced water.
And I'm just standing there in my pajamas
just thinking like I knew this man when he was a boy,
and he used to just drink tap water out of his hand
because he was too lazy to get a cup.
And now he's out in the street jogging and shit?
God, he must be so into her.
Oh, girl, bye. Mm.
Gary's not serious about this fit bitch.
He is single.
So he's gonna see other people.
So can you.
Hazel, I don't want to see other people.
I mean, I haven't forgiven Gary yet,
but I'm not ready to move on.
Well, then, tell him that.
Nah.
He's got Melissa now.
If Gary really wanted a divorce, he wouldn't be dragging his feet
on responding to your petition.
Exactly.
People file and have a change of heart all the time.
Maybe you should talk to him tomorrow
and be honest about having second thoughts.
Yes, girl.
Go get your man. Okay.
But not before you handle those brows and de-tangle that hair.
Okay? And two words -- mani pedi.
Excuse me?
I'm just trying to keep it real with you.
You've been looking a little worn out lately.
Tell her, Ari.
Okay, well, Bree, sweetheart, you've been overwhelmed,
so I think you need to take what I like to call a "me" day.
We can't have you looking like that when you see Melissa.
Mnh-mnh.
Oh, I can all Anastasia for an emergency appointment.
Great. Emergency?
Really?
Yeah. Yeah.
Hey, Bree, it's me.
So, I know, like, it took me a while,
but, uh, I finally hired an attorney,
and our prelim court date's been set.
So it looks like we're finally moving forward with the...
divorce.
Yes!
Moonman!
This is so dope!
That was for my "Double Dare" video.
Hey.
Woman #2: Oh, and it looks like the drama just arrived.
Um...
Hello?
How's the writing coming?
Oh, it's -- it's some of the best work I've ever done.
That's wassup.
Why don't you come by the studio tonight
so I can hear what you're working on?
Tonight?
Um, yeah, no, it's not ready-ready, y-you know?
It's all good.
You know, I just wanna vibe and, uh,
just see where you're headed, that's all.
Hmm. Mm-hmm.
See ya tonight.
- Hi. -Hey, where are you?
I'm running errands and then I'll be back.
The -- the interview's not till later.
But I want to run through my talking points with you --
and I can't land on which tie to wear.
The burgundy one, I left it out for you.
Don't stress.
You're gonna be great.
Hey.Hey.
I know you are not just gonna stroll in here
without acknowledging how spotless this place is.
Thank you, Hazel.
I'm gonna go to bed now.
Not before I see your nails.
Anastasia hook you up?
She is the best.
Oh, yes.I mean, what's the point?
I'm gonna die alone anyways.
No, you're -- What's happening right now?
Gary got a lawyer.
No.
Oh, I didn't see that coming.
Turns out he isserious about this bitch.
He's gonna divorce me and marry her,
and his 40-year-old ass will get a chance at a new life
with new babies that her perfect BMI,
fertile body's just gonna pop out,
and I'm gonna be left here alone to raise the kids by myself.
And the only thing I can hope for
is that my son joins the NBA
and wins a championship and then shouts me out,
and he's just like, "Yo, you the real MVP, Mama."
And that will be the highlight of my life,
because single moms can't move on like single dads.
That's just the way it goes. It's not fair.
I can't go out and find me a Melissa.
Damn, girl, that was so dark.
You want the rest of my Chard?
No, I want my tight ass back!
Hazel, I gave Gary the best years of my life.
My hottest years! That was my prime.
I'm not getting a prime anymore.
And now he gets to move on and have a second chance?
How is that fair?
Yes, I know I filed for divorce,
but he was supposed to keep fighting for me
for as long as it took to get me back!
Listen, girl, I know you're hurt, and I'm sorry.
But tomorrow you are going to pull yourself together.
You're gonna beat that face and lay that hair
and slide on those SPANX
and remind Gary what he's missing.
Do you hear me? Yeah.
That is not good enough.
I said, "Do you hear me?"
Yes, yes!
I'm gonna beat my face and lay my hair,
and I'm gonna show his ass what he's been missing.
Whatcha gonna do?
I'm gonna stunt on that bitch.
Yeah! Yeah, that's my girl.
I know you can do this.Thank you.
And I ate the last of the cereal.
Hazel! Stop eating my kids' stuff!
What are you, high all the time?
So, you spent most of your career as a corporate attorney,
your father was one of the few African-American CEOs
of a Fortune 500 company...
Mm-hmm.
...and your children, they go to one
of the most expensive private schools in the world.
So there are people who say that you're "out of touch"
with the average New York voter. What do you say?
Um, my father was so devoted to his job
that he missed birthdays, recitals,
sometimes even holidays with his family
so his son and granddaughter
could live the life of privilege that he was denied.
I'm not ashamed of that.
But as a black man, I'm not immune to
or unaware of the challenges
that many marginalized groups in this country
are facing on a daily basis.
So I personally feel it's my responsibility
to use that privilege to advocate
for change on their behalf.
Advocate for what, exactly?
Well, comfortable, affordable housing --
That's pretty ambitious.
How does that happen in real life?
Well, first, we have to limit the number of developers
who can enter our communities,
second, we have to strip these new high-price buildings
of their rent control exemption, and most importantly...
Most importantly?
Uh, yes, most importantly...
Well, Mark -- if -- if I may?
We must get rid
of discriminatory housing practices.
Mm.I mean, even people of color
with means can be forced out of the housing market
due to overly invasive applications
and screening processes.
And David and I want to make sure
that people of color can maintain their dignity
while finding a home for their family.
That's a pretty good answer, Mrs. Montgomery.
Any future in politics for you?
Well, right now, we are focused
on getting David Montgomery to the Senate.
Okay. Not a "no" -- just saying.
It's not a "yes."
Okay, fair enough. Fair enough.
Okay, now, I know it's not done yet,
but I just want to hear what you got so far.
What's going on?
I don't -- I don't know if I'm feeling this track anymore.
You're not feeling it?
Yeah, can we work on something else?
Oh, okay.
So that's how you want to play it, huh?
What you mean?
What I mean is...
Hey. Uh-uh.
Hold on a second.
What the hell, Hazel?
You know you got an album release date
just around the corner, and --
and you haven't even done anything yet.
It'll get done. When?
I just need to get into my creative space.
Well, you haven't been in that space for over a month.
Yeah, and maybe it'll take another month or another.
I'm not a slave to a date.
Okay?
Why do you care so much anyway?
It's because I because in you.
I wanna see you win.
You don't think I wanna win?
I don't know anymore.
You know, you say you do, but your actions say otherwise.
Whatever, Khalil.
No, not whatever.
Look, Hazel, I know you're going through a lot right now.
But this is the perfect chance for you to take that pain
and channel it into your music like you used to.
Honesty.
That's got you here in the first place.
Hell, that's what your fans want.
They want the real you.
Why you can't just give 'em that?
Because -- Because what?
Because I'm scared!
What are you scared of, Hazel?
I-I went from waiting tables to the Grammys stage in a year.
A lot of people --
They blamed Derek for my missteps.
Hazel.
But I can't hide behind him anymore.
So if I fail,
I don't have anybody to blame but myself.
My son told me you demanded
I return your funky little Tupperware
and and Crock-Pot, like you were gonna cook up a real meal.
We all know you were just gonna order some of those
dry-ass pizzas from Pepper P's like you did for Ollie.
So I took it upon myself to cater my grandbaby's party.
You're welcome.
Thank you, Doreen.
Now go fix up.
You're not gonna scare off "Marathon Melissa"
looking like Harriet Tubman.
I gotta to give it to you, Ari.
You really came through for Bree on this party, girl.
Well, and you really came through on this punch.
I mean, it's delicious.
What did you put in it?
Vodka.
Oh, Lord.And some other things.
I drank the whole cup.
It's all right.
Oh, there she is. Imani!
Imani!Daddy!
Hey! There is the birthday girl!
I can't believe she showed up.
Happy birthday, Princess.
Hey, this is from me.
Thank you, Daddy.You're welcome.
And this is from me.
Don't nobody want your little raggedy gift.
Who are you?
Uh, well, this is, uh -- This is --
This is Daddy's friend, Melissa.
You can put it over there with the others.
Okay.
Just put them over there.
It's all good. Okay.
Imani know Melissa ain't shit.
She didn't drink --
Oh, I see you, sexy.
Oh, my God!
You look so good!
Oh, my God, thanks to you guys.
Honestly, thank you for the spa day.
And thank you for all this help with the party. Aww!
You know what? I'm just gonna -- Can you all just excuse me for one second?
Thank you.
I was losing my mind about -- you know.
Oh, hey, Gary.
Hey. Hi.
Um, this is -- This is a great party.
It is. It's pretty dope.
Yeah.
And -- and you look good.
You really, really good.
Oh, thanks. I just threw this together
because I was so busy with the party.
I haven't had time for much.Okay.
So I just kind of woke up like this.
Mommy! Daddy!
Come get a balloon!
Yes. They are very expensive.
All right.
Here's some punch, Auntie Hazel.
Aww! Thank you, sugar.
About time.
Now, go and get your mama and daddy some punch.
They could use some punch, too.
Okay.
Good call, Haze. Good call.
You know, I do what I do.
Ohh!
So, um, how did you meet Married -- I mean Gary?
At the gym.
Ordering smoothies.
That is such a great story.
Thank you.
Doreen, this fried chicken looks so good.
It more than looks good.
You should have some.
Oh, no, I'm vegan.
But I have a fantastic recipe for mock fried chicken.
Not interested.
Uh, this punch is vegan.
And it's basically straight vodka,
and I'm gonna get a refill.
Would you like some?Thank you, but no.
I'm off alcohol right now, too.
Only clean foods.
I can't. I just cannot.
Oh, I-I got to take this --
You calling to yell at me again?
No, I thought about everything you said.
I think I have something to help you
get you past your block.
Meet me at 9:00.
I'll text you the address.
Open Mic Night?
Well, hello to you, too.
Have you lost your damn mind?
Am I out of my mind?
Are youout of your mind?
C'mon, Haze.
This is the perfect place for you to try some new shit out.
Think about it.
Even if it ain't finished yet.
Hello? I know you got some ideas in that head of yours.
I do, but this is -- But?
But what?
I haven't preformed for free in years, Khalil.
Well, maybe that's the problem, hmm?
Where's Melissa?
Uh, she left a while ago.
She's got an early meditation retreat in the morning.
Okay.
Will you help me break this down?
I'm a little drunk. I don't know how to do this.
No, no, no. You know what?
I want to jump in there.
I want to jump in it.
C'mon, let's jump in it.No.
Gary, no, we're adults.
Oh, c'mon.This is for kids.
Bree, it'll be fun. C'mon!
Live a little!
What if we break it? What if something happens?
We're not gonna break this bouncing house.
Come on. Okay, okay.
Get in -- Okay, fine!
Let's be spontaneous.Just for five minutes.
Five minutes.
Here we go. Oh, my goodness.
No wonder kids have such a hard time getting out.
Okay. Oh, my God.
See? I told you!
This is not easy for the big titties.
I like it.
Shut up, perv.All right, I'm gonna bounce you.
No, don't bounce me!
Don't bounce me!
Ow! See?
That's what you get for calling me a pervert.
Not funny!
Don't trip me up!
Don't make fun of me.What are you doing?
Don't -- Trying -- What you trying to do?
So, I personally feel it's my responsibility to use
that privilege to advocate for change on their behalf.
Advocate for what, exactly?
Hey, sexy.
Are you drunk?
No... um, maybe.
Ari, stop. I-I'm trying to watch it.
You recorded it. You can watch it later.
I want to see it live.
And most importantly...
Oh, God damn it.
Most importantly?
Uh, yes. Most importantly...
T-They didn't edit that out?
Well, Mark --It makes you look human.
It's fine.
You're being too hard on yourself.
Oh, this is bad.
We must get rid of discriminatory h--
Look, look, look. Ari!
What? What?
I'm just trying to finish what we started.
N-- Hey! I'm -- I'm busy!
You're always busy when it comes to what I want.
You know, I wake up at 5:00 --
5:00 o'clock every morning, and I work until the moment
my head hits the pillow every night.
I am tired.
Shit.
What, you expect me to dick you down every night?
Dick me down?
Nigga, is that what you think you do?
Dick -- dick me down? No, no, no, no.
You stick it in for 8, maybe 10 seconds, if I'm lucky,
but that's only after you watch porn
or whatever it is that gets you hard,
because it sure as shit isn't me.
You don't kiss me.
You don't touch me.
It takes effort.
I don't have time for this silly-ass argument.
I pick out your ties.
I run your campaign.
I saved your ass on TV.
I do everything for you.
And you do nothing for me, David.
Do you know that you have never even once given me
an orgasm in the entire 17 years that we have been together?
Is that silly to you?
Now, this next act needs no introduction,
but I'ma do it anyway.
Give it up for Hazel Rachelle.
Bet you didn't expect to see the likes of me up in here tonight.
Me either.
Uh, I got tricked into this by, uh, a friend.
Um, I...
I wrote this last night.
It's a --
It's a work in progress, so bare with me.
Can you gave me something sexy to rock with?
One, two, three.
Okay, where are you going?
Oh, so you're just gonna leave now?
Hello. Ari, speak to me.
Where are you going?
Sag Harbor.
S-Sag Harb-- No, no, no, no.
No, you're not going to Sag Harbor.
You can't just leave.
I'm six weeks away from the election.
What the hell am I supposed to do without my campaign manager?
I don't know.
But you're gonna find out.
'Cause I quit, effectively immediately.