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Previously on
Four Weddings and a Funeral...
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I love you, and I've never
said that to anybody.
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I wanna be with you.
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Well, I wanna be with a senator,
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so stop kissing
your communications director
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and get back to work.
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Ted Spencer has been involved
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in an extramarital affair.
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Haskins worked for Spencer
as a dog walker.
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- I didn't come for you.
- I came for your blood sugar.
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If I'm not here, you'll just
have coffee and chocolate bar.
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Finally got my letter
from Penguin Publishing.
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Would you please...
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"Although it shows
great promise,
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we regret that we are unable
to publish it at this time."
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I hate my job,
and I've always wanted to act.
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- Hi, my name's Gemma.
- I'm Ainsley's best friend.
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- Come on in.
- Maya!
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See those girls over there
playing soccer?
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- See the one in the red shorts?
- Yeah.
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- That's my daughter.
- What did Zara say?
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Craig...
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Would you still like to get
a drink with me sometime?
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Maybe.
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So, you know you had
that stupid idea
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that I should stay in London?
I think I'm gonna do it.
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Are you serious?
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I have a daughter.
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So you told Maya
before you told me?
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I'm sorry, I just
didn't think you'd understand.
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Wouldn't understand?
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Why wouldn't you go
with me to Stonehenge?
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I don't know.
It sounds dorky.
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Like Lord of the Rings.
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Oh... oh, hi.
Hi, Mom.
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We need to talk.
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Hey, Maya, great to see you.
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Hi, Mrs. Howard.
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Mm.
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So, did you and Dad
have a nice time in Bali
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on my honeymoon?
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He got terrible food poisoning.
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He's resting in the hotel.
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He can't eat exotic food
like rice.
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Oh, when do you guys
fly back to Texas?
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Actually, that's what
I wanted to talk to you about.
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Your father and I think
you should come home with us.
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Wait, what?
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You need a fresh start
away from that man.
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I knew he was trouble
from the beginning,
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and not because he's Muslim.
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I like Muslims.
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I watch Dr. Oz every day.
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- Mom, my whole life is here.
- What about my store?
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You mean the store that
your father and I pay rent on?
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That is an investment
in Ainsley Howard Designs.
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What about the mortgage
that we pay on this townhouse?
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That is an investment
in Ainsley Howard the woman.
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Listen, your father and I've
been happy
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to help you out the last
couple of years,
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but after
that extravagant wedding,
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we have reached our limit.
Think about it, honey.
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I don't need to think about it.
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All my friends are here.
I'm staying, Mom.
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- I admire your tenacity.
- Thank you.
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And it's gonna come in handy,
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because we're cutting you off.
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Oh, God.
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♪ You've got a sweet
little place in my heart ♪
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♪ Like a sweet little rain
takes care of the flowers ♪
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♪ And that's love ♪
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♪ Your kind of love,
your kind of love ♪
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- Oh, my God!
- It's is not a big deal.
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Dude, I'm unemployed,
and your mom just cut you off.
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We are one month away
from being Dickensian urchins.
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- No, we're not.
- No.
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I run a very successful
home design store.
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You're gonna get a job.
We're gonna be fine.
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- You think so?
- Yeah, I know so.
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Okay, well, we need to be
smarter about money.
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- Yeah.
- So let's cook our own dinner tonight.
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- Great!
- I'll book a cooking class.
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No, Ains.
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Yeah, I'll Google
how to make hot dogs.
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Why would you quit your job?
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Because acting's the only
thing I've ever wanted to do.
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I'm tired of living my life
just to please other people.
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Oh, I don't know, man.
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All the actors I knew in college
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ended up dead or working
at a Hard Rock Cafe.
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Yeah, well, I've already got
an audition lined up.
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It's an open call for
A Midsummer Night's Dream.
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My life sucks.
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You're gonna leave me to play
a wood sprite or some shit,
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and I haven't heard
from Zara in a week.
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- Hey, man, she'll come back.
- She always does.
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- I don't know, man.
- This feels different.
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You should have seen her.
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She was really upset.
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Well, listen,
I'm always here to talk.
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Thanks, man.
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For the next few weeks at least.
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After that, I'll be too famous.
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Ugh, "too famous."
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- Hey.
- Hi.
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Nice suit.
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You solving crimes in a small
British seaside town?
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No, worse.
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I have a job interview
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with this old crusty member
of Parliament.
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- Who?
- Have you ever heard of Andrew Aldridge?
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- Oh, yeah, isn't he gay?
- He can't be that bad.
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- I looked him up.
- He's that bad.
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Andrew Aldridge is the epitome
of old school white privilege.
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He's completely out of touch
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with the priorities
of real people,
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and in general
is kind of a jerk.
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And congratulating
the Honorable Member
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Thibault Server on once again
having absolutely nothing
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intelligent to say
on this subject.
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I emailed every political
connection I had,
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and he's the only response
I got.
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Oh, I'm sorry.
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Wait, why do you look hot?
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I do not look hot.
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- Oh, my God.
- Did you contour your face?
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You did!
Your nose is, like this thin.
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Fine.
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I'm going to Craig's office
later.
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He's gonna help me figure out
my money stuff.
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Oh, Craig's office,
which he shares with Kash.
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I thought you didn't believe in
looking hot to go see your ex.
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Okay, Miss Marple, you got me.
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I wanna look hot when I see the
man that left me at the altar.
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- Is that pathetic?
- No, no, it's necessary.
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- Good luck.
- Thank you.
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Oh dear, where's Ainsley, Gemma?
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Oh, well, I don't know.
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I mean, she's never
been late before.
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Poor thing.
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Probably doesn't want to show
her face after what happened.
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Do you have any idea
why her fiancé called it off?
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Was he cheating
because she was boring
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or was he cheating
because she was tacky?
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He wasn't cheating,
she was too good for him.
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Look, why don't we just start?
I'm sure she'll be along.
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Ha! We can't very
well play two-on-one.
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Can we?
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Maybe 'Stasi and I should
play singles,
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just until you find a partner,
Gemma.
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Shouldn't be a problem,
a woman of her pedigree.
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Bye-bye.
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It was horrible, Quentin.
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God, darling, they're awful.
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Why wasn't Ainsley there?
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- I don't know.
- Maybe she's injured.
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Americans are so cavalier
about crossing the street here,
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because we have free healthcare.
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Well, she doesn't look injured.
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She's in her living room
chatting with Maya.
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Is she?
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I mean, this is
very conservative.
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Yeah.
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Oh, my God.
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Like hell I will.
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Hmm.
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So, if you could have
any other job in the world
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except for French teacher,
what would it be?
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Um, I guess a French tutor.
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Does that count?
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No, no, that does not count.
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- I'm sorry.
- Okay... 'kay, what about you?
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00:07:46,570 --> 00:07:48,910
Uh, well, you're gonna think
this is kinda lame,
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but I've always kind of thought
of myself as a novelist.
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- Really?
- Yeah.
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You seem too stable and
well-adjusted to be a novelist.
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00:07:56,840 --> 00:08:01,230
Hmm, well, actually,
I have, uh, quite a dark past.
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Half my grandparents are dead.
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- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- No, no, no I'm just kidding.
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00:08:10,410 --> 00:08:12,370
So, do you fancy yourself
as a novelist
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or have you written anything?
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Yeah, actually, a whole book.
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- No.
- What's it about?
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It's a quiet epic spanning
six generations.
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One New England family coping
with love, loss,
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and the decline
of the cod industry.
187
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Oh, my God,
that sounds brilliant.
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Would you ever let anybody
read it?
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- Are you kidding?
- Yeah!
190
00:08:33,330 --> 00:08:35,300
No, I'll go print you
off a copy right now.
191
00:08:40,930 --> 00:08:44,770
I should probably email it to you.
It's 1,400 pages long.
192
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Wow.
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Can't wait.
194
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:52,370
George, I love working
on the acquisitions team...
195
00:08:52,370 --> 00:08:56,210
And you did a great job
with the Asia-Pacific fund.
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00:08:56,210 --> 00:08:58,340
I'd say you have a real yen
for it.
197
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Thanks, but recently,
I've been reassessing my life,
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00:09:04,060 --> 00:09:08,900
and I've decided
to pursue acting full time.
199
00:09:08,900 --> 00:09:11,950
Look, mate, I get
what this is about.
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Huh?
201
00:09:13,290 --> 00:09:15,670
How 'bout a 20% raise?
202
00:09:15,670 --> 00:09:17,090
This isn't about a raise.
203
00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:19,220
- Sure, it isn't.
- 30%.
204
00:09:19,220 --> 00:09:22,010
No, look, this is just
something I have to do.
205
00:09:22,010 --> 00:09:24,190
Oh, you are a real arsehole,
206
00:09:24,190 --> 00:09:27,070
which, I guess, is why
I hired you.
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00:09:27,070 --> 00:09:31,780
35% and that's my final offer.
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00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:35,170
- I'm sorry, George.
- Consider this my two weeks notice.
209
00:09:37,250 --> 00:09:39,130
But you're my favorite, Kash.
210
00:09:39,130 --> 00:09:42,300
And you dressed up as Aladdin
for my daughter's birthday.
211
00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:44,640
She still asks about you!
212
00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:53,030
It's so weird that you still
have to share an office with Kash.
213
00:09:53,030 --> 00:09:54,370
I know.
214
00:09:54,370 --> 00:09:56,170
Yeah, I tried to switch,
but I guess
215
00:09:56,170 --> 00:10:00,170
no one wants to share with him,
'cause... he sucks.
216
00:10:00,170 --> 00:10:04,390
- So, where is he anyway?
- Oh, uh, he doesn't spend a lot of time in here.
217
00:10:04,390 --> 00:10:08,150
I kind of iced him out.
218
00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:11,530
Anyway, screw that guy.
Let's talk about your money.
219
00:10:11,530 --> 00:10:14,290
Now, without your family's help,
220
00:10:14,290 --> 00:10:16,330
you're gonna have to live solely
off the profits from your store.
221
00:10:16,330 --> 00:10:18,080
Well, that's fine, right?
222
00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:20,420
I mean, I always have
a million people in there.
223
00:10:20,420 --> 00:10:23,220
Most of them are Asian teenagers
Instagramming, but still...
224
00:10:23,220 --> 00:10:27,520
Yeah, the thing is, you have to
make more than you spend, Ains.
225
00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:29,230
I know that, Craig.
226
00:10:29,230 --> 00:10:34,070
Which currently,
given your expenses, you don't.
227
00:10:34,070 --> 00:10:36,450
Come here, take a look.
228
00:10:36,450 --> 00:10:41,130
Orchids, fancy bottled water, pet
daycare for your two design assistants...
229
00:10:42,130 --> 00:10:44,350
Do you need two
design assistants?
230
00:10:44,350 --> 00:10:45,850
You should fire one.
231
00:10:45,850 --> 00:10:48,140
- My Tonys?
- Definitely not.
232
00:10:48,140 --> 00:10:51,440
They are the bedrock of my business
and the wind beneath my wings.
233
00:10:51,440 --> 00:10:53,280
Well, you need to save money
somewhere.
234
00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:55,990
Make some trims.
Don't pay for everybody's lunch.
235
00:10:55,990 --> 00:10:59,000
Turn the heat down.
Pick up your own takeout.
236
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,500
You gotta think about what's
essential and cut everything else.
237
00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:05,470
- Okay, I'll do it.
- Gotta start somewhere, right?
238
00:11:07,270 --> 00:11:10,650
Hey, thank you for having
my back after the wedding.
239
00:11:10,650 --> 00:11:12,280
I know it cost you a friend.
240
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,070
- Oh, yeah!
- Oh.
241
00:11:14,070 --> 00:11:15,620
- Mm, I love you.
- I love you.
242
00:11:15,620 --> 00:11:17,540
Yep, okay.
243
00:11:17,540 --> 00:11:19,120
See you later.
244
00:11:24,340 --> 00:11:25,930
Exactly, yeah.
245
00:11:25,930 --> 00:11:27,470
Well, thank you for your time,
sir,
246
00:11:27,470 --> 00:11:28,520
and keep fighting
the good fight.
247
00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:30,560
Yeah.
248
00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:32,570
Uh, you might want to give him
a minute or so.
249
00:11:32,570 --> 00:11:34,320
He's still in the afterglow.
250
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:35,820
I think I'll be fine.
251
00:11:35,820 --> 00:11:37,950
Oh.
252
00:11:37,950 --> 00:11:40,370
You're American.
How fun.
253
00:11:40,370 --> 00:11:42,710
Perhaps, a fresh, foreign
perspective is just
254
00:11:42,710 --> 00:11:46,010
what this notoriously
traditional man is looking for.
255
00:11:46,010 --> 00:11:47,510
Maybe.
256
00:11:47,510 --> 00:11:49,730
Next!
257
00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:53,530
Best of luck, love.
258
00:12:01,420 --> 00:12:03,800
Ah, you have
excellent references
259
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:07,930
from your employers
in the States.
260
00:12:07,930 --> 00:12:10,390
All of them quite liberal I see.
261
00:12:10,390 --> 00:12:13,480
Well, "If you're not liberal when
you're young, you have no heart."
262
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:17,280
"And if you're not conservative
when you're old, You have no brain."
263
00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:19,030
Churchill, not bad.
264
00:12:19,030 --> 00:12:21,250
Well, if you think I'm good
at quoting speeches,
265
00:12:21,250 --> 00:12:22,630
you should see how well
I write them.
266
00:12:22,630 --> 00:12:25,130
Ah, well, I do like confidence,
267
00:12:25,130 --> 00:12:28,970
and I must say
your CV is sterling.
268
00:12:28,970 --> 00:12:33,900
Although, you do gloss over
your exit from your last job.
269
00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:36,490
I gather you were sleeping
with the senator.
270
00:12:39,780 --> 00:12:41,450
I'm sorry,
but how do you know that?
271
00:12:41,450 --> 00:12:43,750
Politics is a small world, dear.
272
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:48,970
In this puritan age, gossip is one
of the few vices we're still allowed.
273
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:52,310
Well, it was
a complicated situation.
274
00:12:52,310 --> 00:12:53,900
Oh, I don't care.
275
00:12:53,900 --> 00:12:55,980
I'm just trying
to discern whether
276
00:12:55,980 --> 00:12:59,110
you're a successful woman
who had an affair with her boss
277
00:12:59,110 --> 00:13:02,660
or a woman who's successful because
she had an affair with her boss.
278
00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:05,960
Okay, I think we're done here.
279
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:08,380
Oh, is this interview over?
280
00:13:08,380 --> 00:13:09,890
It is.
281
00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:10,930
I don't wanna work
for someone like you.
282
00:13:10,930 --> 00:13:12,430
Well, we're in luck,
283
00:13:12,430 --> 00:13:14,480
because I don't wanna hire
someone like you.
284
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,110
Kindly get out of my office.
285
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,260
Of course England is run
by old white men.
286
00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:31,100
England invented old white men.
287
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:32,850
We never talk about
all the good things
288
00:13:32,850 --> 00:13:34,140
old white men have done, do we?
289
00:13:34,140 --> 00:13:35,860
Harvey.
290
00:13:35,860 --> 00:13:39,780
Like, abolished slavery,
gave women the right to vote.
291
00:13:39,780 --> 00:13:41,620
Maybe it's a good thing
you didn't get this job.
292
00:13:41,620 --> 00:13:43,830
- This guy sounds horrible.
- I know.
293
00:13:43,830 --> 00:13:46,880
And how dare he imply
that I slept my way to the top.
294
00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:49,260
- Of course you didn't.
- Not at all.
295
00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:52,510
Being a politician's assistant
hardly qualifies as "the top."
296
00:13:52,510 --> 00:13:55,060
Oh, you should work
for Perce Nighthall.
297
00:13:55,060 --> 00:13:56,480
He works out at my club.
298
00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,020
I would love to.
299
00:13:58,020 --> 00:14:00,110
Perce Nighthall is, like,
my dream politician.
300
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:04,160
Yeah, he's passionate,
authentic...
301
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,830
- Yeah, for sure.
- There you go.
302
00:14:05,830 --> 00:14:07,840
And he, like, never wears a tie.
303
00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:09,760
No matter what the color
of your skin
304
00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:12,970
or your gender or your
socioeconomic background...
305
00:14:12,970 --> 00:14:14,310
Can you introduce me to him?
306
00:14:14,310 --> 00:14:15,810
Oh, no, no, no.
307
00:14:15,810 --> 00:14:17,400
When I go to the club,
I usually just sit
308
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,020
in the steam room until
my newspaper wilts.
309
00:14:19,020 --> 00:14:21,530
Well, maybe you could get me
a day pass?
310
00:14:21,530 --> 00:14:23,990
Even if he doesn't have a job for
me, I'd love to meet him.
311
00:14:29,420 --> 00:14:33,140
Sure, swing by tomorrow.
Maybe you'll bump into him.
312
00:14:33,140 --> 00:14:34,890
Oh, my God, thank you.
313
00:14:34,890 --> 00:14:36,770
Ainsley and I would
come with, but we have plans.
314
00:14:36,770 --> 00:14:39,440
- Mm, I was gonna text you.
- I was wondering if we could...
315
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:40,990
You promised you'd help me
find a dress
316
00:14:40,990 --> 00:14:43,240
for Giles' Parents' Weekend
at Cragscross.
317
00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:44,910
Keep our plans exactly the same.
318
00:14:45,950 --> 00:14:48,670
Good.
319
00:14:48,670 --> 00:14:50,340
Now try the Stilton.
It's divine.
320
00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:51,720
Ooh.
321
00:14:54,090 --> 00:14:57,770
"My lord, fair Helen
told me of their stealth.
322
00:14:57,770 --> 00:15:00,520
"Of this, their purpose
hither to this wood.
323
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:03,700
And I, in fury, hither..."
324
00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:05,990
- Hey, Dad.
- Hi.
325
00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:09,040
- What happened to your head?
- Nothing.
326
00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:13,090
I tried to lift a ski bag onto the
scale, and I passed out.
327
00:15:13,090 --> 00:15:14,760
What?
328
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,100
Did you forget to check
your blood sugar again?
329
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:18,270
- I know, it know.
- It's my fault.
330
00:15:18,270 --> 00:15:19,980
I deserve my bump.
331
00:15:19,980 --> 00:15:22,650
Abu, you have to take
better care of yourself.
332
00:15:22,650 --> 00:15:23,860
I do.
333
00:15:23,860 --> 00:15:25,820
I eat salad.
I wear my Fitbit.
334
00:15:25,820 --> 00:15:27,200
Wearing it is not the exercise.
335
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:28,960
You have to walk too.
336
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,630
How many times are we gonna
have this conversation?
337
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,500
You have a 12-year-old son.
He needs you around.
338
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:34,550
It's just hard.
339
00:15:34,550 --> 00:15:36,470
I get home after a long day
at work,
340
00:15:36,470 --> 00:15:38,930
and the last thing
I want to do is go walking.
341
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:45,660
I'm sorry. It's not just
Asif who needs you around.
342
00:15:45,660 --> 00:15:48,040
Okay?
We both do.
343
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:49,580
Why?
344
00:15:49,580 --> 00:15:51,210
You don't listen to me anyway.
345
00:15:51,210 --> 00:15:53,960
I saw you with a glass
of something on Facebook.
346
00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:56,760
You drink apple juice
at the pub?
347
00:15:58,810 --> 00:16:00,310
I'll make you dinner.
348
00:16:01,980 --> 00:16:03,650
- Can it be fish?
- Sure.
349
00:16:03,650 --> 00:16:06,610
- And chips?
- You already said yes.
350
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:11,210
Heh.
351
00:16:17,970 --> 00:16:21,850
- You know I love you.
- I love you more.
352
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:25,070
But I am trying to make
this business more efficient,
353
00:16:25,070 --> 00:16:28,910
so what would you say your main
responsibilities are here?
354
00:16:28,910 --> 00:16:32,210
Um, picking the store playlist.
355
00:16:32,210 --> 00:16:33,880
Keeping track of merchandise.
356
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:36,550
Inspiring you to take
hair risks.
357
00:16:36,550 --> 00:16:38,890
- Restocking the store.
- Interpreting your dreams.
358
00:16:38,890 --> 00:16:40,220
Issuing invoices.
359
00:16:40,220 --> 00:16:42,100
Just like, generally being here
360
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:43,860
and, like, vibing.
361
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:49,780
Look, Tony 1, I think
you are fabulous.
362
00:16:49,780 --> 00:16:52,080
Oh, my God, I think
you're so fabulous too.
363
00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:54,290
Like, you're the only person
I've ever worked for who, like,
364
00:16:54,290 --> 00:16:57,630
actually believes in me and
doesn't make me feel like I'm shit.
365
00:16:57,630 --> 00:17:00,300
Like my stepdad Rod used to.
366
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:01,980
Uh...
367
00:17:01,980 --> 00:17:04,270
Tony 1, Tony 2,
368
00:17:04,270 --> 00:17:07,780
after careful consideration,
369
00:17:07,780 --> 00:17:12,710
I have decided that the best
way to cut the budget is...
370
00:17:14,790 --> 00:17:16,920
No more bottled water.
371
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,260
- Oh, my God, no.
- No, no, no.
372
00:17:19,260 --> 00:17:20,800
We should... we should phase
it out gradually
373
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:23,140
over the course of three months.
374
00:17:23,140 --> 00:17:24,850
Ainsley!
375
00:17:24,850 --> 00:17:26,860
I'm going to go on
a hunger strike.
376
00:17:26,860 --> 00:17:30,410
♪ I'm the bad guy ♪
377
00:17:36,290 --> 00:17:39,840
Excuse me, hi.
Are you Perce Nighthall?
378
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,430
- I am.
- Do you work here?
379
00:17:41,430 --> 00:17:43,470
Because I brought this magazine
from home,
380
00:17:43,470 --> 00:17:45,060
so I am allowed to fill out
the sudoku.
381
00:17:45,060 --> 00:17:47,610
No, um, I'm just a fan.
382
00:17:47,610 --> 00:17:51,320
I loved that speech you gave
defending the National Health Service.
383
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:53,040
It was awesome.
384
00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:55,670
Wow, I did not realize
British Members of Parliament
385
00:17:55,670 --> 00:17:57,340
were celebrities
with young Americans.
386
00:17:57,340 --> 00:17:59,210
I should move to I. A.
387
00:17:59,210 --> 00:18:01,510
Well, no, I used to work
in a Senate office in New York.
388
00:18:01,510 --> 00:18:03,140
Do you know Ted Spencer?
389
00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:04,850
Yeah, of course, he gave
that terrific speech
390
00:18:04,850 --> 00:18:06,270
on wage inequality.
391
00:18:06,270 --> 00:18:08,730
Well, I guess you're a fan
of me too.
392
00:18:08,730 --> 00:18:10,440
- I wrote that.
- You're serious?
393
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,570
- Yeah.
- That is incredibly impressive.
394
00:18:12,570 --> 00:18:14,120
- It's a pleasure to meet you.
- Thank you.
395
00:18:14,120 --> 00:18:16,540
I am Maya Jones.
396
00:18:16,540 --> 00:18:19,880
This might be too forward,
but you wouldn't be in the market
397
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:21,300
for a speech writer, would you?
398
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,260
You know, maybe I would.
399
00:18:23,260 --> 00:18:24,930
Why don't you give my office
a call?
400
00:18:24,930 --> 00:18:27,020
- Great.
- Yeah, I will.
401
00:18:27,020 --> 00:18:28,980
- Thank you.
- It's my pleasure.
402
00:18:28,980 --> 00:18:30,440
Oh, hey, Maya.
403
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,410
I stole this.
404
00:18:32,410 --> 00:18:34,740
- Shh.
- Oh, just...
405
00:18:34,740 --> 00:18:37,500
All right, feedback time.
406
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,340
And let me have it.
407
00:18:39,340 --> 00:18:42,630
Did you love my book
or did you love-love it?
408
00:18:45,180 --> 00:18:49,190
Okay, well, let me begin
by saying I am honored
409
00:18:49,190 --> 00:18:50,690
you let me read this.
410
00:18:50,690 --> 00:18:53,200
And just be honest
and don't hold back.
411
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:57,080
Okay, well, my honest assessment
412
00:18:57,080 --> 00:19:00,670
is that it's far too long,
oddly plotted,
413
00:19:00,670 --> 00:19:04,600
and very self-indulgent.
414
00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:08,230
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah, okay.
415
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,480
I can feel a "but" coming.
416
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,690
Well, I just feel
417
00:19:12,690 --> 00:19:16,120
the protagonist masturbates
far too often.
418
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,250
Mm-hmm.
419
00:19:17,250 --> 00:19:18,580
Yeah, well, he doesn't... yeah,
420
00:19:18,580 --> 00:19:20,000
it's just he masturbates
a normal amount.
421
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,420
So it's probably just
gender bias.
422
00:19:21,420 --> 00:19:23,470
Oh, Duffy,
please don't get upset.
423
00:19:23,470 --> 00:19:25,220
I'm in awe you finished a novel,
424
00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:28,520
and there is a 20-page
section at the end,
425
00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:30,810
which is... oh, it's exquisite.
426
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,410
Out of a 1,400-page novel,
427
00:19:35,410 --> 00:19:38,200
you like 20 pages?
428
00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:43,010
You know what, maybe you don't get it
'cause of cultural differences, huh?
429
00:19:43,010 --> 00:19:47,180
'Cause all my American friends,
they love my novel.
430
00:19:47,180 --> 00:19:49,480
- Oh, they do?
- Yeah, yeah, they do.
431
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:53,150
So maybe you need to go
reread it, or I-I don't know.
432
00:19:53,150 --> 00:19:57,120
Tabby, maybe you
should just... go.
433
00:20:16,950 --> 00:20:19,240
Are you ready to begin
alterations, Madam?
434
00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:21,580
- No, just a moment.
- I'm waiting for my friend.
435
00:20:21,580 --> 00:20:23,380
I trust her eye more than mine.
436
00:20:23,380 --> 00:20:25,970
She's American
and unburdened by tact.
437
00:20:25,970 --> 00:20:27,220
Is that Gemma Thorpe-Blood?
438
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:31,730
It is Gemma Thorpe-Blood.
439
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:35,860
Oh, how are you, darling?
It's been ages.
440
00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:37,030
Clementine.
441
00:20:37,030 --> 00:20:38,490
Atalanta.
442
00:20:38,490 --> 00:20:41,000
What a wonderful surprise.
443
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,580
I'm just picking up a dress for
Parents' Weekend at Cragscross.
444
00:20:43,580 --> 00:20:46,970
- Oh, you look marvelous.
- You'll be best in show.
445
00:20:49,510 --> 00:20:51,470
- Ciao, darling.
- Bye.
446
00:20:51,470 --> 00:20:53,860
- Must brunch soon, yeah?
- Bye-bye.
447
00:20:53,860 --> 00:20:55,360
Bye.
448
00:20:59,450 --> 00:21:03,370
So... which Tony did you fire?
449
00:21:03,370 --> 00:21:06,210
- Neither, I chickened out.
- Ugh.
450
00:21:06,210 --> 00:21:08,260
And then I felt so bad
about even considering it
451
00:21:08,260 --> 00:21:10,300
that I bought them both
Ariana Grande tickets.
452
00:21:10,300 --> 00:21:13,350
- Heh.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Ains.
453
00:21:13,350 --> 00:21:15,190
My mother's right.
454
00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:18,280
I should just give up
and go home.
455
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,700
- No.
- No, you shouldn't.
456
00:21:20,700 --> 00:21:21,790
You can do this.
457
00:21:24,120 --> 00:21:26,170
I got it.
458
00:21:26,170 --> 00:21:27,710
Oh!
459
00:21:27,710 --> 00:21:29,130
Oh, hey, Gemma...
460
00:21:29,130 --> 00:21:30,850
Oh, my God, dress shopping.
461
00:21:30,850 --> 00:21:33,060
I'm so sorry.
I got caught up with work.
462
00:21:33,060 --> 00:21:35,770
And you couldn't call
or text or do that
463
00:21:35,770 --> 00:21:39,200
WhatsApp thing you made me
download when we went to Croatia?
464
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:40,660
You gotta cut me some slack.
465
00:21:40,660 --> 00:21:42,450
I am trying to keep
my business alive.
466
00:21:42,450 --> 00:21:43,870
Oh, so that gives you
free rein to act like
467
00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:45,790
a complete and utter arsehole,
does it?
468
00:21:45,790 --> 00:21:47,550
I am not an "arsehole."
469
00:21:47,550 --> 00:21:50,220
I'm just not some rich guy's
bored wife
470
00:21:50,220 --> 00:21:52,010
who has all the time
in the world.
471
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:55,980
- I see.
- I didn't...
472
00:21:55,980 --> 00:21:57,480
Sorry to have bothered you.
473
00:21:59,190 --> 00:22:01,870
Gemma!
474
00:22:24,950 --> 00:22:26,670
Khan.
475
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:30,970
Oh, sorry, Kash Khan.
476
00:22:33,930 --> 00:22:35,140
Hi.
477
00:22:37,310 --> 00:22:38,520
Whenever you're ready.
478
00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:43,910
"My love to Hermia,
melted as the snow,
479
00:22:43,910 --> 00:22:45,950
seems to me now as..."
480
00:22:47,370 --> 00:22:49,500
Sorry, do you mind
if I start again?
481
00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:50,550
Of course.
482
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:58,770
"My love to Hermia,
melted as the snow,
483
00:22:58,770 --> 00:23:01,610
"seems to me now,
as the remembrance of an idle gaud,
484
00:23:01,610 --> 00:23:05,080
"Which in my childhood
I did dote upon.
485
00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:09,840
"To her, my lord,
was I betroth'd ere I saw Hermia:
486
00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:13,300
"But like in sickness,
did I loathe this food;
487
00:23:13,300 --> 00:23:17,640
"But as in health,
come to my natural taste.
488
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:22,280
"Now I do wish it, love it,
long for it,
489
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:25,280
and will for evermore
be true to it."
490
00:23:26,740 --> 00:23:28,160
Thanks for coming in.
491
00:23:29,750 --> 00:23:32,760
I could try it again,
different way.
492
00:23:34,930 --> 00:23:37,260
We've seen all we need.
493
00:23:37,260 --> 00:23:38,810
Thank you.
494
00:23:41,570 --> 00:23:46,240
- Look, darling, an unannounced guest.
- Your favorite.
495
00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:48,040
I'm sorry to bother you.
496
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,660
I know now might not
be the best time,
497
00:23:49,660 --> 00:23:52,130
but I got an interview
with Perce Nighthall,
498
00:23:52,130 --> 00:23:53,550
and I wanted to say thanks.
499
00:23:53,550 --> 00:23:55,340
- Oh!
- Thank you.
500
00:23:55,340 --> 00:23:56,890
Lovely, lovely bottle of scotch.
501
00:23:56,890 --> 00:23:58,850
It'll be perfect
for very late in the evening.
502
00:23:58,850 --> 00:24:01,650
- Oh.
- And I'm too far gone to know the difference.
503
00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:05,400
Congratulations
on the interview.
504
00:24:06,950 --> 00:24:09,500
- Are you okay?
- Yes, I'm fine.
505
00:24:09,500 --> 00:24:10,790
It's nothing.
506
00:24:12,590 --> 00:24:15,420
If you must know,
I have no friends.
507
00:24:15,420 --> 00:24:18,010
- No, Ainsley didn't mean...
- Really, and it's not just her.
508
00:24:18,010 --> 00:24:21,600
It's those evil twats
that I socialize with.
509
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:26,280
They make fun of me,
because my... my father started
510
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:27,740
a dog food company.
511
00:24:27,740 --> 00:24:29,830
So they have
mean little nicknames...
512
00:24:29,830 --> 00:24:31,540
Pedigree, Best in Show.
513
00:24:31,540 --> 00:24:33,840
It really is
a wonderful product.
514
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:36,470
They only use choice cuts
and almost no fecal matter.
515
00:24:36,470 --> 00:24:39,260
- I'm sorry, I don't understand.
- What's the problem?
516
00:24:39,260 --> 00:24:40,560
Well, they all think
I'm beneath them,
517
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:41,690
because I'm "new money."
518
00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:43,310
We didn't inherit our wealth.
519
00:24:43,310 --> 00:24:45,860
We made it all through
hard work.
520
00:24:47,150 --> 00:24:49,280
Why do you hang out
with these people?
521
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:50,700
They sound terrible.
522
00:24:52,120 --> 00:24:54,210
Without Ainsley,
they're all I have.
523
00:24:54,210 --> 00:24:56,760
She was my only true friend.
524
00:24:56,760 --> 00:25:00,060
Well, I know she's going
through a lot right now,
525
00:25:00,060 --> 00:25:03,730
but I'm always here if you ever
need someone to talk to.
526
00:25:05,530 --> 00:25:08,030
Well, that's kind, dear,
thank you.
527
00:25:08,030 --> 00:25:09,700
But neither of us
really want that.
528
00:25:11,370 --> 00:25:12,710
Yeah.
529
00:25:20,050 --> 00:25:22,020
Kash!
530
00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:23,770
You were right.
Zara's coming back.
531
00:25:23,770 --> 00:25:25,270
I was all worried about nothing.
532
00:25:25,270 --> 00:25:26,400
Oh, that's brilliant.
533
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:27,690
Hey, I've got a huge problem.
534
00:25:27,690 --> 00:25:29,240
I've been a delusional idiot,
535
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:30,620
and I've gotta beg George
to give me job back.
536
00:25:30,620 --> 00:25:32,160
Dude, what are you talking
about?
537
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:33,750
- What happened at the audition?
- I was rubbish.
538
00:25:33,750 --> 00:25:35,670
In all my excitement
about becoming an actor,
539
00:25:35,670 --> 00:25:37,550
I never stopped to ask
if I was any good.
540
00:25:37,550 --> 00:25:39,130
And guess what.
I'm not.
541
00:25:39,130 --> 00:25:42,310
Listen, I would love
nothing more
542
00:25:42,310 --> 00:25:45,230
than for you and I to grow old
together sitting in this office.
543
00:25:45,230 --> 00:25:47,900
But if acting means
this much to you,
544
00:25:47,900 --> 00:25:50,910
you owe it to yourself
to keep trying.
545
00:25:50,910 --> 00:25:53,160
You already gave George
your notice.
546
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:55,580
Don't waste any more time here.
547
00:25:55,580 --> 00:25:57,130
I don't know.
548
00:25:57,130 --> 00:25:58,960
Do you really think
I can do this?
549
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:00,720
I do.
550
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,470
But I'm wrong about most things.
551
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:10,070
The right is exploiting
cultural anxieties to steal
552
00:26:10,070 --> 00:26:12,450
working class votes,
so Labour needs to be
553
00:26:12,450 --> 00:26:14,580
the party of economic hope.
554
00:26:14,580 --> 00:26:16,670
Yes, I've always said "the
voter with an eye on his wallet
555
00:26:16,670 --> 00:26:18,290
doesn't care about the accent
of the man across the street."
556
00:26:18,290 --> 00:26:20,130
- Exactly.
- Yeah.
557
00:26:21,550 --> 00:26:22,970
Sorry if this is too American,
558
00:26:22,970 --> 00:26:25,310
but I would be so excited
to work for you.
559
00:26:25,310 --> 00:26:27,610
I'm really impressed
by your policy positions.
560
00:26:27,610 --> 00:26:29,400
- Well, thank you very much.
- You're hired.
561
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:31,320
You're funny.
562
00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:34,490
- Yeah, no.
- Seriously, I like you.
563
00:26:34,490 --> 00:26:36,120
You're hired.
564
00:26:36,120 --> 00:26:38,420
- Oh, wow.
- Uh, thank you.
565
00:26:38,420 --> 00:26:40,340
Ta-da.
566
00:26:40,340 --> 00:26:42,760
I think we are going to do some
really great things together.
567
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:43,850
My office will be in touch.
568
00:26:48,020 --> 00:26:49,230
Thank you.
569
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,030
I don't get it.
You got the job.
570
00:26:54,030 --> 00:26:55,580
What's the problem now?
571
00:26:55,580 --> 00:26:57,580
I'm afraid he hired me,
'cause he thinks
572
00:26:57,580 --> 00:26:58,830
I might sleep with him.
573
00:26:58,830 --> 00:26:59,960
- What?
- What makes you say that?
574
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:01,920
I think he knows about Ted.
575
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:04,340
The other guy I interviewed with
knew, so why wouldn't he?
576
00:27:04,340 --> 00:27:06,430
Maybe you're just
being paranoid.
577
00:27:06,430 --> 00:27:07,520
I don't know.
578
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:08,600
At the end of the interview,
579
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:11,190
he did this thing with my arm.
580
00:27:11,190 --> 00:27:13,400
You mean he grabbed your arm?
581
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:15,910
- No.
- Like, did something sexual with your arm?
582
00:27:15,910 --> 00:27:17,330
No, here, let me show you.
583
00:27:17,330 --> 00:27:19,040
- Oh, no.
- Please, no.
584
00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:20,590
I actually hate being used
in demonstrations, so...
585
00:27:20,590 --> 00:27:22,510
Just stand up.
586
00:27:22,510 --> 00:27:24,220
He was like:
587
00:27:24,220 --> 00:27:25,390
I think we're going
588
00:27:25,390 --> 00:27:26,470
to do great things together.
589
00:27:26,470 --> 00:27:27,890
Gah... yeah, that's creepy.
590
00:27:27,890 --> 00:27:29,560
- What?
- That is so nothing.
591
00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:31,860
- Insane.
- You don't know how I felt!
592
00:27:31,860 --> 00:27:34,030
This is why I hate being used
in demonstrations.
593
00:27:34,030 --> 00:27:35,740
Is that what people
are gonna think
594
00:27:35,740 --> 00:27:37,790
for the rest of my life
that everything I achieved
595
00:27:37,790 --> 00:27:39,460
was because I was sleeping
with my boss?
596
00:27:39,460 --> 00:27:41,460
Babe, that is so crazy.
597
00:27:41,460 --> 00:27:42,880
You know you're good
at your job.
598
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:44,550
- Yeah.
- Do I?
599
00:27:44,550 --> 00:27:47,010
It's hard to know for sure
when all my promotions
600
00:27:47,010 --> 00:27:48,980
came from my boyfriend.
601
00:27:48,980 --> 00:27:53,030
You guys, this is just like
Daisy and Professor Winthrop.
602
00:27:53,030 --> 00:27:55,070
- What?
- Who's Daisy?
603
00:27:55,070 --> 00:27:57,410
Duffy, what the hell
are you talking about?
604
00:27:57,410 --> 00:27:59,330
From my book.
605
00:27:59,330 --> 00:28:02,000
They're characters
from my novel,
606
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:04,300
which you all love.
607
00:28:05,630 --> 00:28:07,560
Oh!
608
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:12,020
The... your... your... your book,
the characters, and the... the...
609
00:28:12,020 --> 00:28:14,480
Wow, none of you read it.
610
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:16,820
None of you read my book.
611
00:28:16,820 --> 00:28:19,200
- I started your book.
- I skimmed.
612
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:20,660
I'm like a... like a quarter in.
613
00:28:20,660 --> 00:28:22,670
Yeah, but none of you
finished it!
614
00:28:24,670 --> 00:28:26,720
It was really long.
615
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:30,220
Craig, you read all the
Harry Potters in three days.
616
00:28:30,220 --> 00:28:33,480
Yeah, but those are, like,
interesting.
617
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:35,030
No, no!
Um...
618
00:28:35,030 --> 00:28:36,450
Oh, that's good.
619
00:28:36,450 --> 00:28:38,160
You know what?
Oh.
620
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:41,500
This is actually perfect fodder
for my next novel,
621
00:28:41,500 --> 00:28:43,790
A Man With No Friends.
622
00:28:43,790 --> 00:28:45,760
- Duffy, calm down.
- Duffy!
623
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,090
- Nope.
- Duffy!
624
00:29:09,010 --> 00:29:11,640
Well, this is a disaster.
625
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,060
What?
626
00:29:13,060 --> 00:29:14,270
I have absolutely nothing
to wear
627
00:29:14,270 --> 00:29:16,690
to the Parents' Weekend.
628
00:29:16,690 --> 00:29:18,780
I'm sorry, darling, we're gonna
have to go shopping.
629
00:29:18,780 --> 00:29:20,240
But you hate shopping.
630
00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,040
No, no, I love it.
631
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:24,920
Why have a shirt tailor-made
when you can buy one
632
00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:27,050
other people's bodies
have touched.
633
00:29:27,050 --> 00:29:29,590
- All right.
- If you want to.
634
00:29:29,590 --> 00:29:32,140
I still haven't found a dress
myself yet.
635
00:29:32,140 --> 00:29:34,270
Brilliant.
636
00:29:36,270 --> 00:29:39,700
Also, I think my nails
could do with some attention.
637
00:29:39,700 --> 00:29:41,160
- Your nails?
- Yeah.
638
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:42,620
I would love for them
639
00:29:42,620 --> 00:29:45,710
to be more triangular
and reflective.
640
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:51,010
And let me guess,
you also have a yearning
641
00:29:51,010 --> 00:29:54,310
to go to Butt-Sculpting
with Kelly?
642
00:29:54,310 --> 00:29:55,810
Yeah.
643
00:29:55,810 --> 00:29:59,320
What a fun girls' day
we have in store.
644
00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:02,030
Oh, Quentin.
645
00:30:02,030 --> 00:30:05,040
- Come on, let's get ready.
- Oh, my God.
646
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:08,880
- You too.
- See you soon.
647
00:30:12,850 --> 00:30:15,100
Hi, Tabby.
648
00:30:15,100 --> 00:30:18,110
Hi, Duffy.
649
00:30:18,110 --> 00:30:19,940
Look, I'm really sorry.
650
00:30:19,940 --> 00:30:22,240
- I was just trying to help.
- Oh, I know that you were.
651
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:25,710
I'm sorry, do you mind
going up a step
652
00:30:25,710 --> 00:30:28,670
so that the height difference
isn't so weird?
653
00:30:33,100 --> 00:30:35,390
Look, I really like you.
654
00:30:35,390 --> 00:30:38,360
I like talking with you
and spending time with you.
655
00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:41,570
And I just hope I didn't ruin
it all by snapping at you
656
00:30:41,570 --> 00:30:43,240
about my stupid book.
657
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:45,240
It's not stupid.
658
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:47,960
- I was far too harsh.
- No, you were right.
659
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:49,750
I mean, there must be
some reason
660
00:30:49,750 --> 00:30:52,720
that every publishing house
rejected it.
661
00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:55,180
And I know that, you know,
young, white, male authors
662
00:30:55,180 --> 00:30:56,770
aren't really in vogue
right now.
663
00:30:56,770 --> 00:30:59,310
- You're losing me.
- Yeah, right, totally.
664
00:30:59,310 --> 00:31:00,900
You know, you said
that there were 20 pages
665
00:31:00,900 --> 00:31:03,030
of my book
that you really liked,
666
00:31:03,030 --> 00:31:06,200
and I was hoping that maybe
you would help me
667
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:08,170
turn them into a short story.
668
00:31:09,540 --> 00:31:10,920
I'd be happy to.
669
00:31:15,470 --> 00:31:18,600
Ooh!
670
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:20,940
Quiet or you'll get detention!
671
00:31:28,750 --> 00:31:31,840
Oh, my God, thank you!
Yes, thank you so much.
672
00:31:33,170 --> 00:31:34,340
Yes!
673
00:31:39,020 --> 00:31:40,230
Oh.
674
00:31:44,030 --> 00:31:45,450
My man.
675
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:55,550
Zara.
676
00:31:55,550 --> 00:31:56,970
Zara?
677
00:31:59,270 --> 00:32:01,100
Zara?
678
00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:10,830
"Dearest Craig, I had
thought I could face you,
679
00:32:10,830 --> 00:32:14,720
"but now that I'm here,
I realize that I'm a coward.
680
00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:18,060
"As I write this,
my eyes are blinded by tears
681
00:32:18,060 --> 00:32:21,230
"partially from the colored
contact lenses I'm wearing,
682
00:32:21,230 --> 00:32:22,940
"but mostly because
I'm leaving you,
683
00:32:22,940 --> 00:32:25,280
"and I'm devastated.
684
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:26,910
"I loved you with all my heart
685
00:32:26,910 --> 00:32:29,200
"and showed you every part
of my soul,
686
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:32,210
"but I realized you will
never be able to do the same.
687
00:32:32,210 --> 00:32:35,210
"So now I must try
to rebuild my life.
688
00:32:35,210 --> 00:32:38,510
"Also, I couldn't find my Prince
George commemorative plate.
689
00:32:38,510 --> 00:32:41,480
"If you see it, please send it
to my second best friend, Poppy,
690
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:44,480
"'Cause Midge is in jail
for punching a bus driver.
691
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,160
Sincerely, Zar."
692
00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:52,120
♪ As I saw
my love is fading ♪
693
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:55,630
♪ Yes, I saw my love ♪
694
00:32:55,630 --> 00:32:57,380
Hey, I'm heading out.
695
00:32:57,380 --> 00:33:00,350
- Do you need anything?
- Uh, no, I think I'm good.
696
00:33:00,350 --> 00:33:02,350
- How was your first day?
- Oh, great.
697
00:33:02,350 --> 00:33:05,190
You Brits take work-life
balance very seriously.
698
00:33:05,190 --> 00:33:08,240
Everyone left for the pub
at, like, 4:59.
699
00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:10,660
Tomorrow, I am gonna need
you to write a press release.
700
00:33:10,660 --> 00:33:13,120
On the new
environmental restrictions?
701
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:17,380
Already did it. - And to think I very
nearly didn't go to the gym that day.
702
00:33:19,090 --> 00:33:22,100
I'm so glad you're here, Maya.
I am one lucky guy.
703
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:28,360
- What are you doing?
- Uh, what?
704
00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:30,490
You put your hand on my back.
705
00:33:30,490 --> 00:33:33,120
No, no, that... that, uh,
that was not a put.
706
00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:34,960
That was a pat.
707
00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:36,380
"Good job, well done."
708
00:33:36,380 --> 00:33:38,590
That's pretty universal,
I think.
709
00:33:38,590 --> 00:33:39,930
I'll see you tomorrow, Maya.
710
00:33:41,850 --> 00:33:44,270
Sorry, but I have to ask.
711
00:33:45,270 --> 00:33:47,590
Did you hire me because you
thought I might sleep with you?
712
00:33:49,780 --> 00:33:52,490
Maya, how dare you ask me
a question like that.
713
00:33:52,490 --> 00:33:55,630
I am a feminist.
My sister is a lesbian.
714
00:33:57,550 --> 00:34:00,220
Look, you might be a creep,
or maybe you're just some
715
00:34:00,220 --> 00:34:03,560
nice guy with boundary issues,
but I'm sorry, I can't work here.
716
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:05,850
'Cause even if I succeed,
part of me will never be sure
717
00:34:05,850 --> 00:34:07,230
it's for the right reasons.
718
00:34:10,450 --> 00:34:14,080
You were the one
who approached me in the gym
719
00:34:14,080 --> 00:34:15,960
wearing a sports bra.
720
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:19,050
What message did you think
you were sending?
721
00:34:19,050 --> 00:34:22,680
- And there it is.
- Thank you for confirming I was right.
722
00:34:25,020 --> 00:34:27,770
I-I am not a creep.
723
00:34:40,460 --> 00:34:42,130
- Hi, Mom.
- Good morning, honey.
724
00:34:42,130 --> 00:34:45,470
I find the most adorable space
for your new shop.
725
00:34:45,470 --> 00:34:47,900
And it's right down
from your father's office.
726
00:34:47,900 --> 00:34:50,190
You could drive to work
together.
727
00:34:50,190 --> 00:34:52,820
I told you, Mom,
I'm not moving home.
728
00:34:52,820 --> 00:34:56,290
You say that now, but we both
know it's just a matter of time.
729
00:34:56,290 --> 00:34:59,500
You are a talented designer.
730
00:34:59,500 --> 00:35:02,430
But Howard women just do not
have a head for business.
731
00:35:10,610 --> 00:35:13,870
Tony?
732
00:35:13,870 --> 00:35:16,040
Tony?
733
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:30,020
Hi.
734
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:36,910
So, I'm not allowed
to nap at work and you are.
735
00:35:36,910 --> 00:35:41,420
Well, good to be king, I guess.
Excuse me.
736
00:35:45,260 --> 00:35:47,600
First of all, Tony 2,
I'd like to thank you
737
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,020
for coming in on short notice.
738
00:35:49,020 --> 00:35:50,480
I hope it didn't ruin
your day off.
739
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:52,900
No, clearly,
I wasn't doing anything.
740
00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:55,740
Here's the thing.
741
00:35:55,740 --> 00:35:57,490
My dad always handled
my finances,
742
00:35:57,490 --> 00:35:58,910
and I thought
after I married Kash,
743
00:35:58,910 --> 00:36:00,580
he would take care of that stuff
744
00:36:00,580 --> 00:36:02,630
and all the things
I thought I couldn't do.
745
00:36:02,630 --> 00:36:04,260
Oh, my God, girl, same.
746
00:36:04,260 --> 00:36:06,390
Like, my boyfriend Marvin
does all my laundry,
747
00:36:06,390 --> 00:36:08,100
because I can't tell
the washer from the dryer.
748
00:36:08,100 --> 00:36:09,770
They look the same.
749
00:36:09,770 --> 00:36:13,110
I'm sorry, but why are you
telling us all this?
750
00:36:13,110 --> 00:36:16,030
Because I have to let you go,
Tony 1.
751
00:36:16,030 --> 00:36:17,530
- What?
- Mm.
752
00:36:17,530 --> 00:36:19,790
- No!
- Yes.
753
00:36:19,790 --> 00:36:21,920
- Why?
- Because you don't do anything.
754
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:25,130
A great example of that is when
I was choking to death earlier,
755
00:36:25,130 --> 00:36:27,050
and you were outside vaping.
756
00:36:29,180 --> 00:36:33,150
You know, there was a reason
I had to vape at that moment.
757
00:36:33,150 --> 00:36:34,820
Hmm.
758
00:36:34,820 --> 00:36:39,160
And you and you will never
know what that was.
759
00:36:40,450 --> 00:36:42,080
Good-bye, Ainsley.
760
00:36:49,720 --> 00:36:51,140
Can I just be called Tony now?
761
00:36:51,140 --> 00:36:52,650
Definitely not, Tony 2.
762
00:36:59,450 --> 00:37:03,880
- Dad, I'm home.
- Dad?
763
00:37:05,130 --> 00:37:07,470
Dad?
764
00:37:07,470 --> 00:37:11,140
Where are you?
I'm hungry.
765
00:37:11,140 --> 00:37:13,020
Dad?
766
00:37:13,020 --> 00:37:14,270
Dad!
767
00:37:25,500 --> 00:37:27,630
"They were stolen
onto this wood,
768
00:37:27,630 --> 00:37:29,680
"And here am I, and wode
within this wood,
769
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,100
Because I cannot meet
my Hermia."
770
00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:34,940
- Hey, dude, what's up?
- It's Dad.
771
00:37:34,940 --> 00:37:36,900
I don't know what to do. - Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, slow down, what happened?
772
00:37:36,900 --> 00:37:38,490
He was on the floor,
and he wouldn't wake up.
773
00:37:38,490 --> 00:37:40,280
- Is he okay?
- I don't know.
774
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:42,330
They're taking him
to City of London Hospital.
775
00:37:42,330 --> 00:37:43,870
All right, I'll meet you there.
776
00:37:59,990 --> 00:38:03,450
- This is all my fault.
- I always made him eat bad.
777
00:38:03,450 --> 00:38:05,460
We split a Twix yesterday.
778
00:38:05,460 --> 00:38:08,550
- Come on, bro.
- I messed up, and now he's gonna die.
779
00:38:08,550 --> 00:38:10,180
He's not gonna die.
780
00:38:10,180 --> 00:38:12,020
Is that what they told you
when Mum got sick?
781
00:38:15,730 --> 00:38:17,730
What are we gonna do
without him?
782
00:38:17,730 --> 00:38:19,280
Look, stop thinking like that.
783
00:38:22,740 --> 00:38:26,540
- Dad's gonna be okay.
- You don't know that.
784
00:38:40,530 --> 00:38:43,700
- Hey, Quentin.
- What's up?
785
00:38:43,700 --> 00:38:45,080
Oh, "What's up"?
786
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:46,500
I'll tell you exactly what's up.
787
00:38:46,500 --> 00:38:48,040
- I've just had my nails done.
- Oh.
788
00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:50,090
I've just been
on a five-hour shopping spree.
789
00:38:50,090 --> 00:38:53,340
I've had my arse sculpted to within
an inch of its life by Kelly.
790
00:38:53,340 --> 00:38:54,930
That sounds like an amazing day.
791
00:38:54,930 --> 00:38:56,350
Then why aren't you the one
doing it?
792
00:38:56,350 --> 00:38:58,230
Hmm?
793
00:38:58,230 --> 00:39:00,400
You've hurt the feelings of the
best person I've ever known,
794
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:01,990
and I know Hugh Laurie.
795
00:39:01,990 --> 00:39:03,950
Well, I didn't mean
to hurt her feelings.
796
00:39:03,950 --> 00:39:05,620
It's... I've just... I've been
really busy...
797
00:39:05,620 --> 00:39:07,670
We're all busy.
798
00:39:07,670 --> 00:39:11,670
Well, I'm not, obviously.
I'm incredibly wealthy, but still...
799
00:39:11,670 --> 00:39:14,090
Gemma planned
your bridal shower, didn't she?
800
00:39:14,090 --> 00:39:16,180
She encouraged you
when you opened up your shop.
801
00:39:16,180 --> 00:39:19,060
Yeah. She does so much
for you and for me.
802
00:39:19,060 --> 00:39:22,900
Whenever I pass out in bed,
'cause I've been overserved again,
803
00:39:22,900 --> 00:39:24,530
I always wake up
under my blanket,
804
00:39:24,530 --> 00:39:26,160
little bottle
of Paracetamol next to me.
805
00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:28,210
I don't deserve that.
I don't deserve her.
806
00:39:28,210 --> 00:39:29,830
- And neither do I.
- You're right.
807
00:39:29,830 --> 00:39:31,250
I will make it up to her.
808
00:39:31,250 --> 00:39:33,420
Oh, you bet my sculpted arse
you will.
809
00:39:33,420 --> 00:39:34,760
Now, you listen
and you listen good.
810
00:39:34,760 --> 00:39:36,310
This is what's gonna happen.
811
00:39:36,310 --> 00:39:38,390
In 20 minutes,
you are going to come over
812
00:39:38,390 --> 00:39:40,610
and you will bend the knee and
you will beg for her forgiveness.
813
00:39:40,610 --> 00:39:41,820
- Do you understand?
- Yes.
814
00:39:41,820 --> 00:39:42,820
- Do you understand?
- Yes.
815
00:39:42,820 --> 00:39:44,570
- Do you?
- Yes.
816
00:39:44,570 --> 00:39:46,160
She will never know
this conversation took place.
817
00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:47,410
Good day to you.
818
00:39:58,390 --> 00:40:00,150
Oh, good, it's you.
819
00:40:00,150 --> 00:40:02,980
- I came to apologize.
- I was completely out of line.
820
00:40:02,980 --> 00:40:04,570
And yeah, your questions
were sexist,
821
00:40:04,570 --> 00:40:06,370
and your political positions
are archaic...
822
00:40:06,370 --> 00:40:08,540
American contrition
is quite rude.
823
00:40:08,540 --> 00:40:10,710
But I do want to work for you.
824
00:40:10,710 --> 00:40:12,710
Why should I hire
a boorish American
825
00:40:12,710 --> 00:40:15,220
who finds my positions
"archaic"?
826
00:40:15,220 --> 00:40:18,600
Because I know that tomorrow you're
giving a speech on the Home Education Bill.
827
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:21,980
And?
828
00:40:21,980 --> 00:40:23,900
And based on previous speeches,
829
00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:26,410
you'll point to the
incompetent, local authorities
830
00:40:26,410 --> 00:40:28,030
the lack
of a national curriculum,
831
00:40:28,030 --> 00:40:30,540
and the failures
of the school attendance order.
832
00:40:32,170 --> 00:40:34,460
Perhaps, and what if I do?
833
00:40:34,460 --> 00:40:36,970
You'll be leaving out
the really convincing argument
834
00:40:36,970 --> 00:40:41,100
about kids with special needs,
especially those without an EHC plan.
835
00:40:46,030 --> 00:40:47,870
That one was for free.
836
00:40:47,870 --> 00:40:50,080
But if you want any more help,
you'll have to hire me.
837
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,880
Interesting,
but I've already hired Marcus.
838
00:40:56,010 --> 00:40:58,090
Marcus, get in here.
839
00:40:58,090 --> 00:40:59,930
Yes, sir.
840
00:40:59,930 --> 00:41:02,020
Now, each of you is more
than qualified to do this job,
841
00:41:02,020 --> 00:41:06,150
so I've decided to hire
you both on half salary.
842
00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:11,290
I hope that won't cause
any problems.
843
00:41:11,290 --> 00:41:13,920
Not at all.
844
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:15,380
- Yes, sir.
- Brilliant idea.
845
00:41:15,380 --> 00:41:17,260
That's that Margaret Thatcher
spirit.
846
00:41:17,260 --> 00:41:21,060
One of us will rise to the top
and the other will die
847
00:41:21,060 --> 00:41:23,020
choking on the rubbish
in the gutter.
848
00:41:23,020 --> 00:41:25,730
Oh, I don't care
about your dynamic.
849
00:41:25,730 --> 00:41:26,990
Please leave.
850
00:41:26,990 --> 00:41:28,950
Thank you.
851
00:41:35,210 --> 00:41:37,010
Well, if we're gonna work
together,
852
00:41:37,010 --> 00:41:38,880
I hope we can be friends.
853
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:40,470
Yeah, one small problem.
854
00:41:40,470 --> 00:41:43,180
I can't be friends
with my mortal enemy.
855
00:41:43,180 --> 00:41:44,600
Have a bad night.
856
00:41:50,950 --> 00:41:54,330
I am so sorry
for what I said, Gemma.
857
00:41:54,330 --> 00:41:56,750
I'm not just a housewife
with endless time on her hands.
858
00:41:56,750 --> 00:41:59,470
I'm on the board of three
different bird-related charities.
859
00:41:59,470 --> 00:42:03,350
I know, and you do so much
for me and for the birds.
860
00:42:03,350 --> 00:42:07,780
I'm sorry. I've... I've been a
shit friend because of work.
861
00:42:07,780 --> 00:42:09,110
And Maya's neediness.
862
00:42:10,240 --> 00:42:12,540
But I promise to always
make time for you.
863
00:42:16,130 --> 00:42:18,960
Perfect. Our court time
tomorrow is 6:00 a. m.
864
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:20,470
Dress to impress.
865
00:42:20,470 --> 00:42:22,510
Come on,
I'll show you my outfit.
866
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:25,940
Kash Khan.
867
00:42:28,270 --> 00:42:29,940
Kashif Khan.
868
00:42:33,490 --> 00:42:34,660
Kalij.
869
00:42:53,490 --> 00:42:56,670
- Dad.
- Dad, you're alive!
870
00:42:58,000 --> 00:42:59,710
Were you worried about me, Beta?
871
00:42:59,710 --> 00:43:01,130
Hmm?
872
00:43:01,130 --> 00:43:02,470
The doctor says
you're gonna recover.
873
00:43:02,470 --> 00:43:04,680
But you have to stop
working so hard,
874
00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:06,350
and your diet has to change
completely.
875
00:43:06,350 --> 00:43:09,110
If I stop working,
who's going to clothe Asif?
876
00:43:09,110 --> 00:43:10,440
Huh?
877
00:43:10,440 --> 00:43:12,700
I keep telling him
to stop growing,
878
00:43:12,700 --> 00:43:14,030
but he won't listen.
879
00:43:19,290 --> 00:43:21,630
You won't have to work
double shifts anymore.
880
00:43:21,630 --> 00:43:23,300
I just got a big raise.
881
00:43:23,300 --> 00:43:25,760
I'm gonna take care of you,
both of you.
882
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:27,270
How much is the raise?
883
00:43:27,270 --> 00:43:29,560
Can I get a Nintendo Switch
with five games?
884
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:30,820
Get your own raise, man.
885
00:43:38,540 --> 00:43:39,670
- Hello!
- Hi.
886
00:43:39,670 --> 00:43:40,790
Look, I know it's game night,
887
00:43:40,790 --> 00:43:42,800
but I'm not gonna stay long.
888
00:43:42,800 --> 00:43:45,970
I'll play one game of Monopoly
until the end and that is it.
889
00:43:51,650 --> 00:43:54,030
Wow. What... uh, what's this?
890
00:43:54,030 --> 00:43:57,330
Duffy, we were total dicks
about your writing,
891
00:43:57,330 --> 00:43:58,870
and we wanted to make it
up to you.
892
00:43:58,870 --> 00:44:02,090
So we're all gonna read
your book together,
893
00:44:02,090 --> 00:44:04,260
even if it takes
the rest of our lives.
894
00:44:04,260 --> 00:44:06,680
- I-I don't know what to say.
- This is so sweet.
895
00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:08,640
- Thank you, guys.
- Craig, you start.
896
00:44:09,850 --> 00:44:11,480
From Once Was Plenty...
897
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:13,780
"Have you ever looked
into the canyon
898
00:44:13,780 --> 00:44:16,990
"and had the canyon
stare back at you?
899
00:44:16,990 --> 00:44:21,460
"In his 30 years
as a park ranger...
900
00:44:21,460 --> 00:44:25,090
"Ulysses Vance...
901
00:44:25,090 --> 00:44:28,470
"had never felt...
902
00:44:28,470 --> 00:44:30,600
so utterly alone."
903
00:44:32,110 --> 00:44:34,230
Craig, are you crying?
904
00:44:34,230 --> 00:44:35,570
Is my book good?
905
00:44:35,570 --> 00:44:37,950
- No.
- Okay.
906
00:44:37,950 --> 00:44:40,580
I have to tell you something.
907
00:44:40,580 --> 00:44:43,290
Zara and I broke up...
908
00:44:43,290 --> 00:44:45,130
for real.
909
00:44:45,130 --> 00:44:48,260
She's not coming back this time.
910
00:44:48,260 --> 00:44:49,770
Craig, what happened?
911
00:44:49,770 --> 00:44:53,150
I kept something really big
from her.
912
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:01,040
I have a daughter.
913
00:45:23,710 --> 00:45:26,130
Had too much again, darling?
914
00:45:28,050 --> 00:45:31,310
I can't fathom
why you're asleep.
915
00:45:31,310 --> 00:45:33,100
Snooker is so gripping.
916
00:45:33,100 --> 00:45:36,480
Quentin, darling...
917
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:38,530
Quentin, darling?
918
00:45:40,740 --> 00:45:42,790
Am I gonna have to put you
in your pajamas again?
919
00:45:45,170 --> 00:45:46,750
Quentin.
920
00:45:49,550 --> 00:45:52,770
Quentin?
Darling?
921
00:45:52,770 --> 00:45:54,560
Quentin!
922
00:45:54,560 --> 00:45:56,900
Quentin!
Oh, my God.
923
00:45:56,900 --> 00:45:58,950
Darling?
Wake...
924
00:45:58,950 --> 00:46:00,320
Quentin!
925
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:02,750
Quentin.
926
00:46:02,750 --> 00:46:04,960
Oh, my God.
927
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:07,550
Oh, my God.
Darling?
928
00:46:07,550 --> 00:46:12,680
Oh, my God, oh, no.
What do I do?
929
00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:15,140
Where's my phone?
Quentin!
930
00:46:15,140 --> 00:46:17,730
Quentin, darling?
931
00:46:17,730 --> 00:46:20,740
Oh, my God!
932
00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:11,050
Go to bed.