1 00:00:06,130 --> 00:00:07,798 I met that director you were talking about. 2 00:00:07,881 --> 00:00:09,422 (SPEAKING SPANISH) 3 00:00:09,506 --> 00:00:12,547 She's great. She's healthy and normal... 4 00:00:12,631 --> 00:00:13,631 (CAR HONKS) 5 00:00:13,714 --> 00:00:15,172 Wait! Wait, no! Don't jump. 6 00:00:15,255 --> 00:00:16,172 No drama. 7 00:00:16,422 --> 00:00:17,673 ♪ ("ELLOS QUIEREN SANGRE" BY VARSOVIA PLAYS) ♪ 8 00:00:17,756 --> 00:00:19,923 MRS. VALDEZ: (SPEAKING SPANISH) 9 00:00:26,964 --> 00:00:28,631 MARK STEVENS: Are you ready to change your life 10 00:00:28,714 --> 00:00:29,756 and take control of your future? 11 00:00:29,839 --> 00:00:30,923 ÚRSULA: 12 00:00:32,130 --> 00:00:33,422 TATI: 13 00:00:42,214 --> 00:00:43,589 ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪ 14 00:00:53,339 --> 00:00:56,673 WATER'S SHADOW: (SPEAKING IN BUBBLING SOUNDS) 15 00:01:02,214 --> 00:01:04,798 WATER'S SHADOW: 16 00:01:14,089 --> 00:01:16,839 WATER'S SHADOW: 17 00:01:42,923 --> 00:01:45,172 WATER'S SHADOW: 18 00:01:53,172 --> 00:01:57,130 WATER'S SHADOW: (CRASHING WATER SOUNDS) 19 00:01:57,214 --> 00:02:01,339 ♪ ("ELLOS QUIEREN SANGRE" BY VARSOVIA PLAYS) ♪ 20 00:02:09,297 --> 00:02:11,381 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 21 00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:15,089 NARRATOR: 22 00:02:15,172 --> 00:02:16,255 (SCOFFS) 23 00:02:17,547 --> 00:02:19,381 (EERIE RINGTONE PLAYS) 24 00:02:35,714 --> 00:02:37,422 WOMAN: 25 00:02:47,381 --> 00:02:51,130 ♪ (ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 26 00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:52,839 (CLOCK TICKS) 27 00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:55,130 ÚRSULA: 28 00:02:56,923 --> 00:02:58,589 ♪ (INFOMERCIAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 29 00:03:08,005 --> 00:03:09,089 ♪ (MUSIC ENDS) ♪ 30 00:03:31,005 --> 00:03:32,464 ANDRÉS: 31 00:04:01,089 --> 00:04:04,673 MELISSA GIBBONS: (IN ENGLISH) And another American corporation over here, 32 00:04:05,631 --> 00:04:07,172 and another over here. 33 00:04:07,255 --> 00:04:08,798 Hey, are we out of the Dunkin' ones? 34 00:04:08,881 --> 00:04:11,172 Ambassador Gibbons, the spooky people are here. 35 00:04:11,255 --> 00:04:14,381 Oh, it's Renaldo, and some other people. 36 00:04:14,464 --> 00:04:16,255 Okay, everyone leave. 37 00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:20,422 Get out unless you're Renaldo, his friends or me. 38 00:04:20,506 --> 00:04:23,130 So, I guess that just leaves you, Jessica. 39 00:04:23,214 --> 00:04:26,130 I'm sorry, this is the end of the road for you. 40 00:04:26,214 --> 00:04:29,047 You led me astray. You told me the bangs were good 41 00:04:29,130 --> 00:04:31,255 when they were a total disaster. 42 00:04:31,339 --> 00:04:34,172 People laughed in the face of America. 43 00:04:34,255 --> 00:04:35,631 JESSICA: I understand. 44 00:04:35,714 --> 00:04:37,923 I won't forget everything that I've learned here, 45 00:04:38,005 --> 00:04:40,923 and even though I won't become the next American ambassador, 46 00:04:41,005 --> 00:04:42,756 I've met some amazing girls. 47 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:45,130 ♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 48 00:04:49,339 --> 00:04:50,964 So hard to let girls go. 49 00:04:51,047 --> 00:04:54,381 -So, what brings you here. -(IN SPANISH) 50 00:04:54,464 --> 00:04:56,047 (IN ENGLISH) Oh wait, you know what I need? 51 00:04:56,130 --> 00:04:58,339 I need to find my translating gem. 52 00:05:01,381 --> 00:05:02,297 Hmm! 53 00:05:02,381 --> 00:05:04,547 (IN SPANISH) 54 00:05:07,339 --> 00:05:09,589 (IN ENGLISH) Oh my god, you have to stay downtown. 55 00:05:09,673 --> 00:05:13,422 (IN SPANISH) 56 00:05:13,506 --> 00:05:16,381 (IN ENGLISH) I love that, and I can do that like this. (SNAPS.) 57 00:05:16,464 --> 00:05:17,798 But I have another idea. 58 00:05:17,881 --> 00:05:20,130 I get you the visas, and in return, 59 00:05:20,214 --> 00:05:23,255 you get something I need. 60 00:05:23,339 --> 00:05:28,547 It's a... highly sensitive diplomatic matter. 61 00:05:28,631 --> 00:05:31,506 It's top secret, really hush-hush. 62 00:05:31,589 --> 00:05:34,464 I have a week's vacation coming up. I'm going to Tulum, 63 00:05:34,547 --> 00:05:38,005 and (SIGHS) I'll finally have some time to just relax. 64 00:05:38,089 --> 00:05:40,339 Just me, the sun, the sand, 65 00:05:40,422 --> 00:05:43,464 and my seven security guards surrounding my private beach. 66 00:05:43,547 --> 00:05:45,798 But, obviously, a week is not enough. 67 00:05:45,881 --> 00:05:48,506 I need to add on an additional week after that. 68 00:05:48,589 --> 00:05:50,339 And there's only one way of doing that, 69 00:05:50,422 --> 00:05:52,464 and that's by faking my own abduction. 70 00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:56,756 (IN SPANISH) 71 00:06:01,255 --> 00:06:02,964 (IN ENGLISH) I don't care. Whatever it is, 72 00:06:03,047 --> 00:06:05,172 just make sure everyone at the office sees it, 73 00:06:05,255 --> 00:06:07,506 let them know that I'll be gone for a full two weeks, 74 00:06:07,589 --> 00:06:10,673 and that if I come back with a tan, it's no big deal. 75 00:06:10,756 --> 00:06:13,214 (IN SPANISH) 76 00:06:13,297 --> 00:06:14,673 (IN ENGLISH) I'm not done. 77 00:06:14,756 --> 00:06:16,506 Oh wait, I am. (CHUCKLES) 78 00:06:16,589 --> 00:06:18,923 (IN SPANISH) 79 00:06:19,005 --> 00:06:20,839 (IN ENGLISH) I'm getting abducted! 80 00:06:20,923 --> 00:06:23,005 And this time it's fine because I organized it. 81 00:06:23,089 --> 00:06:24,673 (IN SPANISH) 82 00:06:31,339 --> 00:06:33,130 ♪ (INFOMERCIAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 83 00:06:34,673 --> 00:06:36,798 (IN ENGLISH) Yes! Whatever it is, yes! 84 00:06:37,798 --> 00:06:40,172 (IN SPANISH) 85 00:06:42,798 --> 00:06:44,589 MRS. VALDEZ: 86 00:06:47,923 --> 00:06:50,130 MRS. VALDEZ: 87 00:06:54,255 --> 00:06:56,047 MR. VALDEZ: 88 00:06:56,130 --> 00:06:57,839 ANDRÉS: 89 00:07:10,172 --> 00:07:13,881 MR. VALDEZ: 90 00:07:22,464 --> 00:07:23,881 MRS. VALDEZ: 91 00:07:28,964 --> 00:07:30,673 MR. VALDEZ: 92 00:07:38,339 --> 00:07:41,839 MR. VALDEZ: 93 00:07:41,923 --> 00:07:43,047 MRS. VALDEZ: Yes. 94 00:07:48,381 --> 00:07:51,422 -MRS. VALDEZ: -MR. VALDEZ: 95 00:08:04,422 --> 00:08:06,464 BEATRIZ: 96 00:08:06,547 --> 00:08:08,172 MARLEN: 97 00:08:36,923 --> 00:08:38,464 MARLEN: 98 00:09:00,047 --> 00:09:02,297 MARLEN: (CHUCKLES) 99 00:09:38,964 --> 00:09:41,589 (CHIMES TINKLE) 100 00:10:29,464 --> 00:10:30,881 (IN ENGLISH) 101 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,714 ANDRÉS VALDEZ: 102 00:10:40,047 --> 00:10:41,214 Hmm? 103 00:10:58,673 --> 00:11:00,547 SONIA: (IN ENGLISH) Hello to all my fans. 104 00:11:00,631 --> 00:11:03,130 (TEARFULLY) Thank you so much for watching my GoFundMe video. 105 00:11:03,214 --> 00:11:05,464 So, like, what happened is that I was on my way 106 00:11:05,547 --> 00:11:08,130 to give canned goods to a church and out of nowhere, 107 00:11:08,214 --> 00:11:10,756 an airplane hits me like, bam, on the head. 108 00:11:10,839 --> 00:11:12,172 You know, like a bitch. 109 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:15,589 And, anyway, click the link in my description 110 00:11:15,673 --> 00:11:17,714 so you can see my other GoFundMe video 111 00:11:17,798 --> 00:11:22,172 where my TV was taken from me by a large tornado. 112 00:11:22,255 --> 00:11:23,589 Thank you and God bless. 113 00:11:24,673 --> 00:11:27,547 Wow. You got so many done today. 114 00:11:27,631 --> 00:11:29,881 Every time you open your mouth, 115 00:11:29,964 --> 00:11:32,881 all I hear is "bitch, bitch, bitch." 116 00:11:34,089 --> 00:11:35,673 That's too bad. I'm sorry. 117 00:11:35,756 --> 00:11:37,839 SONIA: I can't take all this abuse. 118 00:11:37,923 --> 00:11:40,214 -(DOORBELL RINGS) -Oh... that just-- 119 00:11:40,297 --> 00:11:41,923 -(KNOCKING) -Here, you can watch it. 120 00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:43,422 (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 121 00:11:45,381 --> 00:11:48,923 Tico. Oh, Tico! Tico, there you are. 122 00:11:49,005 --> 00:11:52,047 Oh, I've been knocking and knocking on every door. 123 00:11:52,130 --> 00:11:53,798 NEIGHBOR: Excuse me, can you please keep it down? 124 00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,339 -BIANCA NOVA: Ooh! -Sorry. 125 00:11:55,422 --> 00:11:58,130 BIANCA: I found him! The man I've been looking for. 126 00:11:58,214 --> 00:12:00,547 The man who saved my life. 127 00:12:00,631 --> 00:12:03,255 I cannot thank you enough 128 00:12:03,339 --> 00:12:07,714 for reigniting the flame of inspiration in me. 129 00:12:07,798 --> 00:12:11,130 Now, what should this movie be about? 130 00:12:11,214 --> 00:12:14,172 I don't even wanna know who this woman is, 131 00:12:14,255 --> 00:12:17,047 but it is clear you are using again. 132 00:12:17,130 --> 00:12:18,839 I never used. 133 00:12:18,923 --> 00:12:23,047 Ooh... let's get to the business of creating. 134 00:12:23,130 --> 00:12:26,506 Now, what should this movie be about? 135 00:12:28,297 --> 00:12:29,506 I'm not really creative, 136 00:12:29,589 --> 00:12:31,714 but my nephew's coming with his friends. 137 00:12:31,798 --> 00:12:33,130 We can wait for him. 138 00:12:33,214 --> 00:12:37,673 Oh, no, no, no, no. No. If we don't start writing today, 139 00:12:37,756 --> 00:12:41,089 I'm gonna go home and swallow a bowl of marbles. 140 00:12:41,172 --> 00:12:43,714 -♪ (MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ -(BELL RINGING) 141 00:12:55,839 --> 00:12:57,172 TATI: 142 00:12:58,381 --> 00:12:59,839 ♪ (INFOMERCIAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 143 00:13:05,506 --> 00:13:08,005 -(DUCK QUACKING RINGTONE) -♪ (INFOMERCIAL MUSIC STOPS) ♪ 144 00:13:11,756 --> 00:13:14,923 MARK STEVENS: (IN ENGLISH) Hi, I'm calling from Hierbalite. Your payment-- 145 00:13:15,005 --> 00:13:17,839 (IN SPANISH) 146 00:13:21,089 --> 00:13:23,381 (PHONE RINGS) 147 00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:29,130 (IN ENGLISH) Hi, I'm calling from Hierbalite Collections. 148 00:13:29,214 --> 00:13:31,714 Is this Miss Úrsula I'm speaking to? 149 00:13:31,798 --> 00:13:34,506 (CHUCKLES) Well, good evening to you and your family. 150 00:13:34,589 --> 00:13:37,756 This is just a friendly reminder that you're out of time. 151 00:13:37,839 --> 00:13:39,422 (SINISTERLY) Where's my money, bitch? 152 00:13:39,506 --> 00:13:41,255 Do you know who the fuck you're talking to? 153 00:13:41,339 --> 00:13:43,214 I'm the Hierbalite CEO, Mark Stevens, 154 00:13:43,297 --> 00:13:45,130 and I personally handle collections. 155 00:13:45,214 --> 00:13:48,005 Chasing down people like you is what I live for. 156 00:13:48,089 --> 00:13:52,130 You have five days to come up with my fucking money. 157 00:13:52,214 --> 00:13:54,547 Please remain on the line for a brief survey 158 00:13:54,631 --> 00:13:56,089 about our call today. 159 00:13:56,172 --> 00:13:59,005 Mark's threats were: A, concise and articulate, 160 00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:01,923 B, a little vague and confusing, C... 161 00:14:09,005 --> 00:14:11,297 -(KNOCKING) -CARMENCITA: (IN SPANISH) 162 00:14:11,381 --> 00:14:12,422 RENALDO: 163 00:14:48,964 --> 00:14:51,422 (SINGING) 164 00:16:00,798 --> 00:16:03,214 ♪ (MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 165 00:16:22,798 --> 00:16:24,589 ♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪ 166 00:16:29,339 --> 00:16:30,381 (CLEARS THROAT) 167 00:16:34,714 --> 00:16:36,381 ♪ (INFOMERCIAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 168 00:16:41,339 --> 00:16:44,381 ♪ ("TE ENTERRARÉ EL TACÓN" BY ZEMMOA PLAYS) ♪ 169 00:17:14,297 --> 00:17:17,089 PONY: 170 00:17:18,923 --> 00:17:21,464 -ANDRÉS: -TATI: 171 00:17:38,047 --> 00:17:39,130 ANDRÉS: 172 00:17:56,547 --> 00:17:58,964 ANDRÉS: 173 00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:11,673 TATI: 174 00:18:38,673 --> 00:18:41,839 ♪ (INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ 175 00:19:08,047 --> 00:19:09,214 PONY: 176 00:19:14,589 --> 00:19:15,714 ANDRÉS: 177 00:19:18,214 --> 00:19:19,923 PONY: 178 00:19:20,005 --> 00:19:22,339 BIANCA: (IN ENGLISH) And then the werewolf... 179 00:19:22,422 --> 00:19:25,047 What's a fun, interesting job? 180 00:19:25,881 --> 00:19:27,339 A job? Um... 181 00:19:28,047 --> 00:19:29,047 A parking valet. 182 00:19:29,130 --> 00:19:30,923 That's good. Yes. 183 00:19:31,005 --> 00:19:35,047 So-- so then, the werewolf is a valet. 184 00:19:35,130 --> 00:19:37,673 And then... it's nighttime. 185 00:19:37,756 --> 00:19:40,714 That's always good. Nighttime is good. 186 00:19:40,798 --> 00:19:43,422 And then, he goes to the valet stand, 187 00:19:43,506 --> 00:19:47,047 and all of a sudden, he, uh... he can't find the keys. 188 00:19:47,130 --> 00:19:51,381 And so, um... the lady, she's really mad. 189 00:19:51,464 --> 00:19:55,005 She says, "I've been waiting here for two hours. 190 00:19:55,089 --> 00:19:57,255 And I've got another party to go to, 191 00:19:57,339 --> 00:20:00,756 and you're holding me back, and I should sue you." 192 00:20:00,839 --> 00:20:03,172 Oh, this is so good. It's very real. 193 00:20:03,255 --> 00:20:05,172 And then she says, "Are you okay? 194 00:20:05,255 --> 00:20:06,839 Why are you a werewolf?" 195 00:20:06,923 --> 00:20:08,881 "Why are you a werewolf?" 196 00:20:10,756 --> 00:20:13,756 -Who should the girl be? -Um... 197 00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,297 Anne Hathaway? 198 00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:19,756 That is... that's just wonderful. 199 00:20:20,631 --> 00:20:23,756 I'm so tired. You type. 200 00:20:24,798 --> 00:20:26,839 (PHONE RINGS) 201 00:20:28,464 --> 00:20:29,547 Beep, beep. 202 00:20:29,631 --> 00:20:31,923 Tico, are you gonna make it? 203 00:20:32,005 --> 00:20:34,881 I can't right now. I'm helping my friend, uh... 204 00:20:34,964 --> 00:20:36,881 -make a movie to write. -(BIANCA GIGGLES) 205 00:20:36,964 --> 00:20:39,881 MANNY: Oh, Tico, what little adventure have you fallen into now? 206 00:20:39,964 --> 00:20:43,464 (CHUCKLES) Don't worry. I sent someone else, okay? 207 00:20:47,964 --> 00:20:49,005 Oh... 208 00:20:50,381 --> 00:20:53,381 Hello. It sucks to be all by yourself right now 209 00:20:53,464 --> 00:20:56,130 because your owner was talking to me earlier 210 00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,297 and calling me something like a bitch, 211 00:20:58,381 --> 00:21:01,047 but I guess you're the bitch now, right? 212 00:21:01,130 --> 00:21:03,547 ♪ ("INFERNO CLUB" BY ACID WAVES PLAYS) ♪ 213 00:21:06,631 --> 00:21:07,798 (CARMENCITA GIGGLES) 214 00:21:10,422 --> 00:21:14,506 -(IN SPANISH) -♪ (MUSIC ENDS) ♪ 215 00:21:27,297 --> 00:21:28,381 (CARMENCITA SIGHS) 216 00:21:53,214 --> 00:21:55,881 KRISSY: (IN ENGLISH) Oh my god, it's so big! 217 00:21:55,964 --> 00:21:58,339 And it's for Melanie. 218 00:21:58,422 --> 00:22:02,005 -We have to tell Melanie. -Melanie! 219 00:22:02,089 --> 00:22:04,005 Melanie, you have a package. 220 00:22:05,547 --> 00:22:07,547 (IN SPANISH) 221 00:22:19,214 --> 00:22:20,506 TATI: 222 00:22:35,714 --> 00:22:37,172 REPORTER: (IN ENGLISH) Ambassador Gibbons, 223 00:22:37,255 --> 00:22:38,964 how do you think history will remember 224 00:22:39,047 --> 00:22:42,130 your country's response about the border crisis? 225 00:22:42,214 --> 00:22:43,506 Border crisis? 226 00:22:43,589 --> 00:22:46,172 I thought this was for People en Español 227 00:22:46,255 --> 00:22:48,547 and you were going to ask me what's in my bag. 228 00:22:48,631 --> 00:22:50,881 Melanie, a package just came for you. 229 00:22:50,964 --> 00:22:52,047 Thank God. 230 00:22:54,339 --> 00:22:56,506 JJ: (GASPS) She's here! She's here! 231 00:22:56,589 --> 00:22:59,214 Huh? A present for me? 232 00:22:59,297 --> 00:23:01,839 I wasn't expecting anything at all today. 233 00:23:01,923 --> 00:23:05,964 And right before my one week vacation. Who's it from? 234 00:23:06,047 --> 00:23:08,047 The card just says, "Hell". 235 00:23:08,130 --> 00:23:09,798 Fun! 236 00:23:09,881 --> 00:23:12,214 (PAPER CRINKLES) 237 00:23:12,297 --> 00:23:14,631 JJ: Oh, it's a mirror. 238 00:23:14,714 --> 00:23:16,881 Oh, it's a beautiful mirror. 239 00:23:16,964 --> 00:23:18,673 Oh, but maybe it's a political statement 240 00:23:18,756 --> 00:23:20,297 forcing us to examine ourselves. 241 00:23:20,381 --> 00:23:22,047 Oh no, get rid of it. 242 00:23:22,130 --> 00:23:25,172 Oh, no, it's okay. It's just a mirror. Okay. 243 00:23:26,089 --> 00:23:28,297 RENALDO: (IN SPANISH) 244 00:23:30,464 --> 00:23:33,130 (IN DISTORTED VOICE) 245 00:23:38,089 --> 00:23:41,214 -(ANDRÉS LAUGHS EVILLY) -RENALDO: 246 00:23:41,297 --> 00:23:42,714 KRISSY: (IN ENGLISH) Oh my god! She's gone. 247 00:23:42,798 --> 00:23:44,839 Who's gonna tuck us in at night? 248 00:23:44,923 --> 00:23:47,381 RENALDO: (IN SPANISH) 249 00:24:12,547 --> 00:24:14,506 MELANIE: (IN ENGLISH) What the hell happened? 250 00:24:14,589 --> 00:24:16,381 RENALDO: (IN SPANISH) 251 00:24:19,464 --> 00:24:22,923 (IN ENGLISH) Um, okay, now I'm stuck in some kind of mirror void? 252 00:24:23,005 --> 00:24:25,172 I thought you guys were makeup artists! 253 00:24:25,255 --> 00:24:28,214 (IN SPANISH) 254 00:24:28,297 --> 00:24:31,130 (IN ENGLISH) Well, this sucks. Now I'm gonna miss my flight. 255 00:24:31,214 --> 00:24:33,923 (IN SPANISH) 256 00:24:38,506 --> 00:24:40,005 (IN ENGLISH) Oh, honey, I'm stuck in a mirror. 257 00:24:40,089 --> 00:24:41,547 I'm not giving you shit. 258 00:24:41,631 --> 00:24:43,089 You get me out of here, I'll think about it. 259 00:24:43,172 --> 00:24:44,464 (IN SPANISH) 260 00:24:44,547 --> 00:24:46,005 MELANIE: (IN ENGLISH) You better get me-- 261 00:24:52,464 --> 00:24:53,547 (GIGGLING) 262 00:25:05,589 --> 00:25:07,839 (MIRROR SHATTERS) 263 00:25:20,589 --> 00:25:21,798 RENALDO: 264 00:25:26,214 --> 00:25:32,297 ♪ ("MONSTRUO" BY MUERAN HUMANOS PLAYS) ♪