1 00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,015 -[boy grunts] -[phone dings] 2 00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:16,680 Hold all my calls. 3 00:00:17,183 --> 00:00:19,353 -[giggling] -[lullaby plays] 4 00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:21,524 ♪ Boss Baby ♪ 5 00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:25,484 ♪ I'm the Boss, Boss Baby, boss, boss Boss Baby, boss, boss ♪ 6 00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:28,067 ♪ Watch a itty-bitty kid get large ♪ 7 00:00:28,153 --> 00:00:30,703 ♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪ 8 00:00:30,780 --> 00:00:33,160 ♪ Stroller rolling Up and down the boulevard ♪ 9 00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,743 ♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪ 10 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,082 ♪ I run this house, I rule this crib ♪ 11 00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:41,714 ♪ Change my diaper, son Where's my bib? ♪ 12 00:00:41,791 --> 00:00:44,421 ♪ Don't pacify You just got to pay me ♪ 13 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:46,962 -♪ Who's in charge? ♪ -♪ Me, the Boss Baby ♪ 14 00:00:48,047 --> 00:00:51,967 ♪ Good morning, merry sunshine ♪ 15 00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:56,058 ♪ How did you wake so soon? ♪ 16 00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:59,809 ♪ You scared the little stars away ♪ 17 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:03,435 ♪ And shined away the moon ♪ 18 00:01:04,105 --> 00:01:08,105 ♪ I watched you go to sleep last night ♪ 19 00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:11,613 ♪ Before I stopped my playing ♪ 20 00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:16,123 ♪ How did you get way over here ♪ 21 00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:19,541 ♪ So early in the day? ♪ 22 00:01:19,954 --> 00:01:22,174 [Boss Baby] Mommy-Daddy-Baby playgroup. 23 00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,134 Fart poop doody. 24 00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:27,419 How did I end up in Mommy-Daddy-Baby playgroup? 25 00:01:28,838 --> 00:01:30,918 Your boardly eminences, 26 00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:33,047 given the corporate malfeasance 27 00:01:33,134 --> 00:01:36,434 of Turtleneck Superstar CEO Not-Really-A-Baby-- 28 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,853 Speak not her name! 29 00:01:39,140 --> 00:01:42,600 I must renounce the title of acting CEO, 30 00:01:42,685 --> 00:01:45,355 given to me under false pretenses. 31 00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:49,482 I appeal to your mighty org chart wisdom 32 00:01:49,567 --> 00:01:55,407 that I be restored only as VP of Field Operations. 33 00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:58,240 Cast you down to Field Operations? 34 00:01:58,326 --> 00:02:00,326 -Balderdash! -Piffle! 35 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,834 In our darkest hour, 36 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:06,844 when Bootsy Calico invaded these blessed halls of business, 37 00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:08,128 who was there? 38 00:02:08,711 --> 00:02:09,921 [all] Boss Baby! 39 00:02:10,004 --> 00:02:13,224 In our other darkest hour, when ancient adversaries 40 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:17,009 declared open war on babykind, who was there? 41 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:18,643 [execs] Boss Baby! 42 00:02:18,888 --> 00:02:23,428 In our even darkerest hour, when our own CEO unmasked 43 00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,978 her geriatric flimflammery, who was there? 44 00:02:27,063 --> 00:02:28,443 [execs] Boss Baby! 45 00:02:28,773 --> 00:02:31,443 The balance sheet speaks only truth! 46 00:02:31,526 --> 00:02:34,776 Who is clearly the problem at this company? 47 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,613 -Guh... -[execs] Boss Baby! 48 00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:38,405 -You're fired. -What? 49 00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:39,331 [door slams] 50 00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:48,212 I like your cardboard box. 51 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,498 [loud thud] 52 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:55,508 [Boss Baby] You pour your baby sweat and soul into a company, 53 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:59,178 and look at the fun farewell prizes they give you. 54 00:02:59,554 --> 00:03:03,354 Six-month supply of the special formula that keeps us from growing up. 55 00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:07,653 Once that's gone, I turn into a regular, dumb, happy baby! 56 00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:08,649 [blows raspberry] 57 00:03:10,148 --> 00:03:12,318 Monitor for emergencies. 58 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,900 I can still wave hi-hi's to you at work! 59 00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:17,156 Hi-hi! Hello there. Yoo-hoo. 60 00:03:18,489 --> 00:03:21,029 And for when unemployed life gets you down, 61 00:03:21,117 --> 00:03:25,077 this motivational poster about adversity! 62 00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,373 Run, hot dog man! 63 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:27,616 I believe in you! 64 00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:30,167 [gasps] Oh, he died. 65 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:36,215 Hey, Tim, maybe you want to jump in here? 66 00:03:36,299 --> 00:03:37,589 Sorry! I'm so sorry. 67 00:03:37,675 --> 00:03:40,925 -I've just really, really gotta find-- -[Dad] Timbo, three minute warning! 68 00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:43,432 [Mom] ♪ First day of school! ♪ 69 00:03:43,514 --> 00:03:44,394 First day! 70 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,809 I can't jump into that without my lucky pencil! 71 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:48,143 Lucky pencil? 72 00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,728 Danny Petrosky's dad snuck a few out of the secret Army base 73 00:03:50,813 --> 00:03:52,693 where they study luckular technology, 74 00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:55,864 and he said he could sell me one if I promised not to tell the government. 75 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:58,704 Danny Petrosky's dad is a liar and a moron, 76 00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,530 and also a great businessman. 77 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:02,945 [suckling] 78 00:04:03,034 --> 00:04:06,794 For the record, sir, I think the board really doodied the tub on this one. 79 00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:08,161 Yeah! Double-doodies! 80 00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:11,376 -[Staci] Say the word, and I'll quit. -[Jimbo] Me, too! 81 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:14,498 Baby Corp is a tub-doodying pile of smushed-- 82 00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:16,337 Don't you finish that slander! 83 00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:18,263 [suckles] 84 00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:20,886 I don't want anybody else throwing their career away. 85 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,509 Baby Corp needs you two. 86 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:25,064 She's a precious pearl of industry. 87 00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:27,140 [groans] Keep her shiny for me. 88 00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:29,642 [sobbing] 89 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,563 [yelps, groans] 90 00:04:34,190 --> 00:04:36,150 I'll spit on a kitten in your honor, sir. 91 00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:37,606 Thank you. 92 00:04:40,446 --> 00:04:41,696 Yes! 93 00:04:41,864 --> 00:04:44,664 Looks like this is Tim Templeton's lucky day. 94 00:04:47,453 --> 00:04:49,043 We're doomed to failure! 95 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:53,842 The Knights Templar sealed their treasure behind a most diabolical code lock. 96 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:56,252 To break it, we'd have to create heavy black marks 97 00:04:56,337 --> 00:05:01,127 that fill the correct bubbles completely, making no stray marks outside the circles. 98 00:05:02,593 --> 00:05:03,433 Lucky me. 99 00:05:08,516 --> 00:05:11,306 ♪ A-plus ♪ 100 00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:14,611 [Mom] Out the door in 30 seconds! 101 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:16,069 Flush 'em and brush 'em! 102 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,075 For good luck? 103 00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:38,418 Go on, enjoy your structured day of deadlines and... 104 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:41,217 [sighs] performance evaluations. 105 00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:44,927 I'm really sorry you lost your job. 106 00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:46,096 Are you gonna be okay? 107 00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,644 Oh, with you at school and Mom and Dad at work, 108 00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:50,893 it'll be good to stay home by myself for the day. 109 00:05:50,975 --> 00:05:54,185 -Clear my head, figure out what's next. -Stay home by yourself? 110 00:05:54,270 --> 00:05:56,520 You know that's not how being a baby works, right? 111 00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,226 Well, where else would I be? 112 00:05:58,608 --> 00:06:00,608 -[babies crying] -[toy squeaks] 113 00:06:00,693 --> 00:06:02,953 [giggling, squealing] 114 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:05,201 -[woman] Aegi, no! -[screams] 115 00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:06,371 [babies babbling] 116 00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:09,289 Oh, you think he's upset we took him out of the suit? 117 00:06:09,368 --> 00:06:12,498 I didn't want him intimidating the other babies on his first day. 118 00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:13,920 He'll be fine. 119 00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,458 I'll see you after work. 120 00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:17,251 -Love you. -Love you, too. 121 00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:19,875 Love you, my brave little man! 122 00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:24,377 We're trading days working from home so one of us can be with the baby. 123 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,927 -You couldn't find daycare either? -Yeah! 124 00:06:27,011 --> 00:06:29,011 They've all been shut down for a while now. 125 00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:30,717 What's the story there? 126 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,227 If you ask any former workers, 127 00:06:32,308 --> 00:06:36,228 they go pale and mumble something about "the Staci incident." 128 00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:38,112 -[baby shouts] -So, playgroup. 129 00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:39,729 Such a great idea! 130 00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:42,486 Nobody cares for a child better than their own-- Ah! 131 00:06:42,568 --> 00:06:46,448 Dakota, that is Daddy's special crime-hitting stick! No! 132 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:48,701 [babbling] 133 00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:51,122 Do your worst, Buskie. 134 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:54,542 Let's see how deep this submarine of humiliation can dive. 135 00:06:54,872 --> 00:06:57,002 -[babbles] -[car horn beeps] 136 00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:58,463 -[car door closes] -[gasps] 137 00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:00,133 We have another newcomer? 138 00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:03,921 Hope everyone's ready to welcome our first real-life celebrity! 139 00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:07,676 Hi! Marsha Krinkle, Channel 8 News. 140 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:09,600 Longtime judger, first-time adopter. 141 00:07:09,679 --> 00:07:11,559 This just in: me! 142 00:07:12,473 --> 00:07:16,193 Local television's most cold-blooded newscaster adopted a--? 143 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:17,309 [babbling] 144 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,522 [gasps] 145 00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:22,320 Fire this world into the sun and let it burn. 146 00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:25,028 Aw! He already made a little friend! 147 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:28,071 -[babbling] -Wow, he is so advanced! 148 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:30,366 I must really be fantastic at this. 149 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,620 Now, where's the coffee? Mama needs a guzzle. 150 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:34,865 Beep-boop-bop-ba-boop- bop-ba-beep-Boss Baby! 151 00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:36,834 Mega Fat Regular Baby. 152 00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:38,884 -Who's looking dapper in a diaper? -[grunts] 153 00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:40,668 Mm, peekaboo, it's you! 154 00:07:40,751 --> 00:07:42,001 Up high, big guy! 155 00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,461 What's the play here? Are you behind this whole thing? 156 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:45,967 Did you get me fired? 157 00:07:46,048 --> 00:07:47,508 [gasps] You got fired? 158 00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:50,432 Oh, my tiny baby heart breaks for your disappointment, 159 00:07:50,511 --> 00:07:53,511 but how fortunate you have me here to help your journey to fulfillment 160 00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,428 as a regular good-boy baby. 161 00:07:55,516 --> 00:07:57,436 Now we high-five for realsies! 162 00:07:58,728 --> 00:08:00,728 Boop! Hello, normal babies! 163 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,573 We are good friends now, yes? Hooray! 164 00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:03,818 Hi-hi-hi-high-five! 165 00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:05,740 No, no, no, no, no, no. 166 00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:06,858 Oh! [groans] 167 00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:09,907 -[chiming, buzzing] -[Boss Baby] Staci, Jimbo! 168 00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,739 I need rational conversation ASAP! 169 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:14,494 -Hit me! -Kind of a bad time, Boss. 170 00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:16,037 The new head honcho just showed up. 171 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,830 They hired another CEO already? 172 00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:21,539 -[mic feedback rings] -Hey, guys. Buddy from HR. 173 00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,286 Just a couple of quick-quicks. 174 00:08:23,377 --> 00:08:28,167 First, after two CEOs in a row that were di-sas-ters, 175 00:08:28,257 --> 00:08:32,297 the board decided to bring in a real tushie-kicker to clean house. 176 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:35,180 [chuckles] Second, if anybody needs to sign out 177 00:08:35,264 --> 00:08:37,274 a pair of sensitivity earmuffs, 178 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,310 come see me, Buddy from HR. 179 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,765 Love you guys. 180 00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:44,268 Why would we need earmuffs? 181 00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:47,777 [elevator whirring, beeping] 182 00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:55,906 [gasps] 183 00:08:55,993 --> 00:08:57,413 [groaning] 184 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,214 [shoes squeak] 185 00:09:07,421 --> 00:09:12,761 Our new boss, Scary Sweary CEO Baby. 186 00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:17,058 Ah, good to be here. 187 00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:21,765 Now get your [babbles] heads out of your [babbles] and get to work! 188 00:09:21,852 --> 00:09:24,522 -[all gasping] -This is a business, not a [babbles]! 189 00:09:24,605 --> 00:09:27,565 -[gasps] So much profanity! -[babbling continues] 190 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:29,490 He used a no-no word. 191 00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:30,902 What does [babbles] mean? 192 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:33,237 Do I look like a [babbles] dictionary? 193 00:09:33,322 --> 00:09:36,032 [babbling continues] 194 00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:37,030 Cool. 195 00:09:37,326 --> 00:09:38,996 Well, we'll talk later, BB. 196 00:09:39,453 --> 00:09:42,373 -It's from France. -[Dad] Come on, we're here to socialize. 197 00:09:42,456 --> 00:09:44,206 -[gasps] -[Dad] Playgroup time! 198 00:09:45,042 --> 00:09:48,422 Forgive me for saying this, Marsha Krinkle, uh, big fan, 199 00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:51,304 but I never pictured you as the mommy type. 200 00:09:51,465 --> 00:09:54,005 You're too kind, but also wrong. 201 00:09:54,093 --> 00:09:55,553 It's modern times. 202 00:09:55,636 --> 00:09:57,346 Parenting's practically a no-brainer 203 00:09:57,430 --> 00:10:00,520 now that Wagby's taken all the worries and guesswork out of it. 204 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:01,430 -Huh? -Whu? 205 00:10:01,517 --> 00:10:04,687 Wagby? The animatronic childcare companion? 206 00:10:04,770 --> 00:10:06,560 -[Dad] Really? -[Mrs. Buskie] Let's see more. 207 00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:09,857 -Wagby? -It stands for "Who's A Good Baby?" 208 00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:12,489 Is it me, Wagby? Am I a good baby? 209 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:14,570 Careful, no oopsies! 210 00:10:14,655 --> 00:10:17,115 Good babies never make messes for Mommy! 211 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:18,948 [chuckles] Oh, thanks, Wagby! 212 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:20,695 You're always so sensible! 213 00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:25,959 Uh... 214 00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:29,625 fine, tell me more about the kangaroo. 215 00:10:29,837 --> 00:10:33,007 -[classical music playing] -Wagby is always expanding baby's mind 216 00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:36,010 with things like classical music, foreign languages... 217 00:10:36,093 --> 00:10:37,143 That's the smart music! 218 00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:40,009 It's guaranteed to make me a president or a Nobel Prize Winner, 219 00:10:40,097 --> 00:10:41,557 or both, most likely. 220 00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:42,727 [soft music playing] 221 00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:46,148 Wagby even maintains baby's ideal nap schedule 222 00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:49,648 for physio-social development and aspirational dreaming. 223 00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:52,441 It's nap-naptime. 224 00:10:52,526 --> 00:10:54,696 Es la hora de dormir. 225 00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:56,204 Neru jikan desu. 226 00:10:56,280 --> 00:10:58,240 Il est temps de dormir. 227 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,122 [groans, gasps] 228 00:11:02,745 --> 00:11:04,825 Wagby says it's nappy-time. 229 00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:05,924 Bonne nuit! 230 00:11:13,089 --> 00:11:15,049 -[Dad] Playgroup at my place tomorrow? -[yelps] 231 00:11:15,132 --> 00:11:16,342 -Yeah, count me in. -Yeah! 232 00:11:16,425 --> 00:11:17,465 See you there! 233 00:11:17,551 --> 00:11:19,931 Bring that kangaroo, will you? I'd love to see more. 234 00:11:20,554 --> 00:11:24,814 Here's news you can use: I wouldn't take my baby anywhere without it. 235 00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,193 You look stressed. 236 00:11:29,271 --> 00:11:30,731 Want to borrow my Wagby? 237 00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:34,605 I don't need some outback backseat driver telling me how to be a baby. 238 00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:36,953 [laughs] My life is great. 239 00:11:37,613 --> 00:11:39,033 Adequate. Passable. 240 00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:40,697 By some measures. 241 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:43,040 [door opens, closes] 242 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,289 [sighs] Stupid first day... [mutters] 243 00:11:45,913 --> 00:11:47,123 What's the matter with you? 244 00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:49,582 Where to even start? 245 00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:51,087 You think you got it bad? 246 00:11:51,168 --> 00:11:52,708 They assigned us an essay! 247 00:11:53,045 --> 00:11:55,085 Who gives homework on the first day? 248 00:11:55,172 --> 00:11:57,882 You lied to my face, lucky pencil! [grunts] 249 00:11:59,343 --> 00:12:00,183 Great! 250 00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:03,891 And now I need a new stupid pencil so I can write a stupid essay 251 00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,853 that shouldn't even stupid exist! 252 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:08,770 [sighs] You're so lucky you're a baby. 253 00:12:09,353 --> 00:12:10,733 [door opens, closes] 254 00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:12,477 [groans] 255 00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:16,645 So this is what it's come to: unemployed, abandoned. 256 00:12:16,735 --> 00:12:18,355 And in casualwear? 257 00:12:18,612 --> 00:12:20,662 Who even am I anymore? [thuds] 258 00:12:20,739 --> 00:12:23,529 [Mega Fat] A sad, failed baby who needs marsupial companionship? 259 00:12:23,617 --> 00:12:24,447 No! 260 00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:25,785 Here, try mine for a day. 261 00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:29,170 If you like it, I'll help convince your mama and papa to buy your own. 262 00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:31,828 Let's be the best baby a baby can be! 263 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:33,667 What are you, working on commission? 264 00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:37,046 You're sad you're not a boss anymore. Baby, I done been there. 265 00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:38,801 But I found my new place in the world. 266 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:41,343 Let's help you find yours. 267 00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:42,847 You're deranged! 268 00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:45,968 You're the one having conversations with an imaginary version of me 269 00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,426 through a television that's not really even turned on. 270 00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:55,520 Find my own new place in the world! 271 00:12:56,525 --> 00:12:58,275 [Boss Baby] You were right, hot dog man. 272 00:12:58,527 --> 00:13:01,277 It's not adversity, it's opportunity! 273 00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:07,945 Today is the first day in the career rebranding of Boss Baby! 274 00:13:10,581 --> 00:13:13,081 -[laughing] -[horn toots] 275 00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:17,671 Greetings, fellow rebel bad boy baby. 276 00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:20,473 You'll notice I've acquired a tattoo. 277 00:13:20,674 --> 00:13:22,894 It's the Chinese symbol for a ladybug. 278 00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,011 [babbles] 279 00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:28,561 -I am not having a mid-infancy crisis! -[screams, thuds] 280 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,391 -[grunting] -This is who I am now! 281 00:13:30,726 --> 00:13:32,596 -Ah! -Well, I will prove it! 282 00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:34,766 -[Boss Baby growls, shouts] -[laughing] 283 00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:36,185 Oh! Ow. 284 00:13:36,690 --> 00:13:38,610 -Oof! -[Buskie laughing] 285 00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:39,986 [Wagby] Not too fast. 286 00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:42,568 Wagby says safety first. 287 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:45,315 That is outstanding advice, Wagby! 288 00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,617 You make me so happy and good. 289 00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:50,451 All right. New identity, take two. 290 00:13:50,788 --> 00:13:52,458 -[blows raspberry] -[Mr. Buskie] Got that baby! 291 00:13:52,748 --> 00:13:53,578 [blows raspberry] 292 00:13:53,832 --> 00:13:56,422 [Dad] Come on, baby! B-B-B-Baby, I'm gonna get you! 293 00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:57,802 Last babies crawling. 294 00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:00,092 I guess we're a lot alike, you and me. [laughs] 295 00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:02,802 That's who we are, just a pair of primo baby athletes. 296 00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:05,393 -[yelps] -[Dad] I got that baby! 297 00:14:05,469 --> 00:14:06,679 [blows raspberry] 298 00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:09,432 -[babbling] -Dakota! Don't let me interrupt. 299 00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:12,595 Just taking the temperature of the room, trying to find my tribe. 300 00:14:13,060 --> 00:14:15,190 Lot of interested parties, several offers, 301 00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:18,021 but, uh, I want to make sure everyone gets a fair shot. 302 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:20,147 We've never really talked. What are you into? 303 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:21,744 -What do you-- Ah! -[shouts] Mine! 304 00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:24,359 [chuckles] No, that one's yours. 305 00:14:24,446 --> 00:14:25,986 -This one's mi-- Ah! -Mine! 306 00:14:26,407 --> 00:14:28,617 -Not yours, mi-- Oh! -[shouts] 307 00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:29,661 Wha--? Hey! 308 00:14:29,743 --> 00:14:30,913 -[shouts] -Ah! 309 00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,286 -How did you even...? -[Mega Fat laughs] 310 00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:37,463 Oh, would you like some bouncy, fun rubber ball time now, Jarreau? 311 00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:38,383 [coos] 312 00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:40,880 Sharing makes everyone cheery! 313 00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,213 It sure does, Wagby! 314 00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:45,972 -[Dakota babbling] -[shouts, growling] 315 00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:47,598 [both shouting] 316 00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:48,548 Mine! 317 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:51,930 I'm trying, but none of it's me. 318 00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:54,976 How do they expect me to jump from a layered-management chain of command 319 00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:56,850 to nasal-drip mobocracy? 320 00:14:56,937 --> 00:14:57,977 Have you tried-- [yelps] 321 00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:01,483 No personal calls on company time, or I'll drop your [babbles] 322 00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:03,397 into a boiling [babbles] so fast, 323 00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:05,945 it'll [babbles] that it'll take an army of [babbles] 324 00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,740 and a case of wet wipes to clean up, you understand? 325 00:15:08,824 --> 00:15:11,874 -[Jimbo whimpering] -You bet your [babbles], sir! 326 00:15:13,495 --> 00:15:15,995 I like the attitude. Watch the potty chair mouth. 327 00:15:16,665 --> 00:15:17,665 [Staci] Gotta go, Boss. 328 00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:21,300 I guess just keep at it? Bye! 329 00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:22,838 -[monitor chirps] -[sighs] 330 00:15:25,215 --> 00:15:28,795 [blowing notes] 331 00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:37,140 Ah! 332 00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,268 Do you even have eyelids? 333 00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:41,767 -[babbling] -What are we today, little chefs? 334 00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:43,977 [chuckles] Fun. Mind if I join? 335 00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,108 -[babbling] -Uh, yeah, thanks. I'll get my own. 336 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:47,195 Hey, easy! Ah! 337 00:15:47,279 --> 00:15:48,739 Not in my hair! [shouts] 338 00:15:52,034 --> 00:15:53,834 -[gasps] -[both] Oh, good, you're here! 339 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:55,161 You gotta help me, Templeton. 340 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:57,535 I don't know where I belong, what to do with myself all day. 341 00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:59,213 You gotta help me! 342 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:01,751 I'm sick of being told what to do with myself all day! 343 00:16:02,002 --> 00:16:03,552 -We need an adventure. -Day planner. 344 00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:06,509 -What are Staci and Jimbo up to? -Oh, I miss those. 345 00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:09,179 -Whoa! -[both shouting] 346 00:16:09,259 --> 00:16:11,639 [Boss Baby] Does it have weekly agenda items, organizer tabs? 347 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:14,220 -[Tim] Hey! Get off! -Can I just smell it? [sniffs, moans] 348 00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:15,176 Aah! 349 00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:17,769 I need direction! 350 00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:22,860 [inhales, sputters] 351 00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:27,240 [sputtering] 352 00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,163 Baby, baby. 353 00:16:31,073 --> 00:16:34,413 -I'm a babe-baby. -[babies giggling] 354 00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:37,713 [Wagby] You are a smart, creative, well-behaved baby. 355 00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:38,791 Thanks, Wagby! 356 00:16:38,872 --> 00:16:42,042 You know, you always make me feel so good about myself. 357 00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:46,593 And now it's nap-naptime! 358 00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:48,546 [babies yawning] 359 00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:53,514 [all] Aw! 360 00:16:53,595 --> 00:16:55,215 Isn't that adorable? 361 00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:57,635 -That Wagby really is something. -[Doug] How did it do that? 362 00:16:57,725 --> 00:16:59,435 Where did you buy yours? 363 00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:01,901 My little guy's been so off his game lately. 364 00:17:01,979 --> 00:17:04,309 You've heard of the Bubbeezee Corporation? 365 00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:05,688 "We make babies easy"? 366 00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:09,453 Uh, I'm a distributor. I can show you the whole product line. 367 00:17:09,987 --> 00:17:11,277 [sighs] 368 00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:13,157 [all snoring] 369 00:17:17,578 --> 00:17:18,698 This is all legit? 370 00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:23,378 You're really happy being a normal baby like... this? 371 00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,052 Oh, never been happier. 372 00:17:27,588 --> 00:17:28,418 [sighs] 373 00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:29,974 Let's Wagby. 374 00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:33,092 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! 375 00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:35,547 [panting] You will never regret this! 376 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,604 Let Wagby's software sync up with your voiceprint. 377 00:17:39,683 --> 00:17:42,523 I'll give you a series of phrases, you repeat them to Wagby. 378 00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:44,443 Then bingo-ba-done-zo, 379 00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:47,401 your whole baby life will be on the Wagby system! 380 00:17:48,150 --> 00:17:49,530 Give me the phrases. 381 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,735 "Wagby is my best friend." 382 00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:54,244 -Wagby is my best-- -Mm-mm. 383 00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:56,195 In baby. 384 00:17:58,285 --> 00:17:59,115 [sighs] 385 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,541 [babbling] 386 00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:02,752 [Wagby whirs, beeps] 387 00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:07,093 -"I accept Wagby into my heart." -[babbling] 388 00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:07,999 [Wagby whirs, beeps] 389 00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:11,338 "Wagby makes me good, and I like being good." 390 00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:14,053 [babbling] 391 00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:14,974 [whirs, beeps] 392 00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:17,932 "I agree to indemnify and hold harmless the Bubbeezee Corporation 393 00:18:18,013 --> 00:18:20,353 for any injuries, losses or claims, whether known or unknown, 394 00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:22,392 which arise during or result from my engagement 395 00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:25,056 with the interactive product commonly referred to as 'Wagby,' 396 00:18:25,145 --> 00:18:27,355 on behalf of myself, my heirs, legal representatives, 397 00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:30,899 any and all other persons, in perpetuity and throughout the known universe." 398 00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:33,571 It's standard boilerplate. 399 00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:40,865 [sighs] 400 00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:45,709 [babbling] 401 00:18:48,043 --> 00:18:48,963 -[Tim] No! -Aah! 402 00:18:49,044 --> 00:18:50,384 -[gasps] -What are you doing? 403 00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:52,337 I-- I don't really know. 404 00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:55,132 I've-- I've been a little lost, having kind of an identity crisis. 405 00:18:55,217 --> 00:18:57,177 -You're a baby! -[gasps] 406 00:18:57,386 --> 00:19:00,216 Never use that word as an insult. It's very offensive to my people. 407 00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:02,215 No, I mean you need to enjoy this. 408 00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:05,852 Not the getting fired part, just being a baby. 409 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,268 This is the most freedom you'll ever have. 410 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:12,609 You get to choose who you are, not some know-it-all kangaroo toy. 411 00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,108 [Wagby whirring] 412 00:19:14,194 --> 00:19:15,534 You broke my Wagby. 413 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,948 -[Wagby stuttering] Safety first. -Aah! 414 00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:19,703 [gasps] Aah! 415 00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:22,333 [stuttering] Vous êtes un bébé intelligent... 416 00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:24,871 -Whoa! -...créatif et bien élevé. 417 00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:27,624 -[babies groan] -[gasps] 418 00:19:28,292 --> 00:19:30,542 [stuttering, distorted] Careful, no oopsies! 419 00:19:30,627 --> 00:19:32,047 [all screaming] 420 00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:33,669 [gasps] My new baby friends! 421 00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:34,884 [babies scream] 422 00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:36,545 -Aah! -[crying] 423 00:19:36,633 --> 00:19:41,353 [stuttering, distorted] Good babies never make messes for Mommy! 424 00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:42,885 [birds chirping] 425 00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:44,023 [babies crying] 426 00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:45,519 -[Doug] Oh! -Seriously? 427 00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:48,851 -Oh, darn nag it! -They just went down for naptime. 428 00:19:48,937 --> 00:19:50,977 [sighs] Oh, I'd better go check on them. 429 00:19:51,064 --> 00:19:52,524 Wagby's got it covered. 430 00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,780 -[babies screaming] -[Mega Fat panting] 431 00:19:58,155 --> 00:20:00,945 Wagby, no! This isn't like you! 432 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:03,493 [Wagby, distorted] Sh-Sharing makes everyone ch-cheery! 433 00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:05,197 -Staci? -Heads up, Boss. 434 00:20:05,287 --> 00:20:07,457 Baby love just took a slight tick down. 435 00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:10,379 Low-grade fussing, frustrated parents. 436 00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:12,749 Nothing major, but ground zero's at your house. 437 00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:14,955 Yeah, that sounds accurate. 438 00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:18,837 Whatever it is, the CEO wants to lead in the field team personally. 439 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:21,136 He's reading the mission brief now. 440 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:22,600 There's no time for reading! 441 00:20:22,679 --> 00:20:25,679 Templeton and I are gonna have to take care of this ourselves. 442 00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:27,773 What do we do with the babies? Aah! 443 00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:29,850 [Wagby, distorted] ...t-temps de dormir! 444 00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:31,307 Templeton, couch fort! 445 00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:34,113 [Tim grunting] 446 00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:35,281 Assembling! 447 00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:37,646 -[crying] -[Wagby stuttering] 448 00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:38,606 Two babies secure! 449 00:20:38,695 --> 00:20:39,985 [Mega Fat] Wagby, no! 450 00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:42,197 -Grab Shover! -[Mega Fat groans] 451 00:20:42,282 --> 00:20:44,912 [Wagby, distorted] W-Wagby says... m-messes for Mommy. 452 00:20:44,993 --> 00:20:46,503 -Mega Fat, take shelter! -[yelps] 453 00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:49,791 -But I can reason with Wagby! -[grunts] 454 00:20:50,415 --> 00:20:52,165 [Wagby, distorted] And n-now it's n-naptime! 455 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:53,341 [grunts] 456 00:20:53,418 --> 00:20:55,958 No shoving! That's your forward shield! 457 00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:58,171 You'll have to get the others! [grunts] 458 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:00,341 [crying] 459 00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:01,724 [gasps] 460 00:21:03,011 --> 00:21:04,971 Come on! [grunts] We have to get clear of-- 461 00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:08,135 [distorted] Best baby-- best baby. Nap-nap-nap-naptime. 462 00:21:11,186 --> 00:21:12,646 [screaming] 463 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:15,653 [distorted] Sharing makes everyone cheery. 464 00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:16,572 [gasps] 465 00:21:18,026 --> 00:21:19,816 -[gasps] -[babbles] 466 00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:20,900 Templeton! 467 00:21:21,822 --> 00:21:22,662 [gasps] 468 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,780 [in slo-mo] No! 469 00:21:25,867 --> 00:21:28,577 [in slo-mo] B-B-Best baby... 470 00:21:29,162 --> 00:21:34,042 -[grunts] -[distorted] And now it's na-na-naptime. 471 00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:36,746 [shorting out] 472 00:21:38,922 --> 00:21:40,302 -[electricity crackles] -[all gasp] 473 00:21:40,382 --> 00:21:41,682 Lucky pencil! 474 00:21:41,758 --> 00:21:43,798 [baby cooing] 475 00:21:43,885 --> 00:21:45,755 [monitor chiming, buzzing] 476 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:49,678 Hey, BB, looks like baby love just stabilized. 477 00:21:49,766 --> 00:21:52,806 CEO's disappointed he doesn't get to go on a mission. 478 00:21:52,894 --> 00:21:55,364 [scoffs] What kind of [babbling]... 479 00:21:55,439 --> 00:21:58,399 But whatever you did, good job! 480 00:21:59,067 --> 00:22:02,487 [babies babbling, laughing] 481 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:06,780 [Boss Baby] Not what I did... 482 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:08,494 what we did. 483 00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:10,911 And look what we just did. 484 00:22:10,996 --> 00:22:14,536 Destroyed my very expensive and helpful kangaroo friend? 485 00:22:14,624 --> 00:22:16,844 I'll buy you a new one when I get my job back. 486 00:22:16,918 --> 00:22:18,838 Hooray for new toys! 487 00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:21,970 -You're getting your job back? -We're getting my job back. 488 00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:25,139 We're going to send baby love higher than it's ever been, 489 00:22:25,218 --> 00:22:27,798 leave Baby Corp begging to take me back. 490 00:22:27,888 --> 00:22:30,558 This isn't a playgroup, it's a field team. 491 00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:31,930 I'm on board with this plan! 492 00:22:32,059 --> 00:22:34,689 [scoffs] Who needs career rebranding? 493 00:22:34,770 --> 00:22:35,600 [door closes] 494 00:22:36,271 --> 00:22:38,401 [rustling, zipping] 495 00:22:39,399 --> 00:22:40,979 I'm the boss, baby. 496 00:22:43,361 --> 00:22:45,781 [theme music playing] 497 00:23:05,133 --> 00:23:07,183 ♪ Boss Baby ♪