Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull M_I_SForEver
All you're gonna know is that everything's under control.
What about it?
I can afford the mortgage.
No, no, come on.
Stop, just stop, stop worrying about it.
Stop, stop, stop worrying about it.
Yeah.
Look, I just pulled up.
I'm outside, can you come open the door for me?
Jessica!
Do you know how much utilities are gonna be here?
Everything's lined up, don't worry about it.
Excuse me.
- Excuse me, thank you. - Oh great.
Besides, it's just me.
How high could they be?
I'm just worried about you dad.
Well, there's nothing to worry about.
The house is pretty great.
It is, isn't it?
It's spacious.
Yeah.
You have hard wood floors.
Yes, it's great.
And look at the moldings.
Did you see the kitchen?
No.
Well come on, you gotta go see the kitchen.
You'll love this.
Hm, yeah, what do you think?
Did the last people leave their fridge and stove?
They came with the house.
What the hell?
Hey Dad!
Did you find something?
Yeah, just a closet within a closet,
and a hundo.
What?
Where did you find that?
It's just right on the ground.
Well that's weird.
Yeah, it looks like the house just bought us dinner.
Thank you house.
Yeah, so, Chinese?
- Sure, okay. - Huh?
You like the chicken egg rolls.
I know you do.
Thanks anyway.
Thanks for helping me with that final load.
It's not a problem at all, Dad.
Yeah, I can't believe I have us
eating on a cardboard box here.
I'm sorry for that.
That's fine.
You know what, maybe I should, I'll take those old couches
and I'll put them outside. How about that?
And that way I get some new ones in here.
I think that'd be good.
That might be nice.
Maybe even a patio table out there, that'd be good.
But I gotta do that septic first.
Maybe after that I'll get the table.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, I saw where you had sectioned off back there.
Mm-hm, yeah.
I gotta get that septic in ASAP.
You know what happens if you don't
get a new septic into an old house?
What?
Your whole life goes to shit.
Your whole life.
Okay, so I haven't told you yet.
What?
I am seeing someone.
Oh boy.
Okay.
All right, what's his name?
What's he do for a living?
That is such a Dad thing to ask.
What, I'm your Father.
Okay, Father, his name is Zack.
He is the manager at Harvey's.
The sandwich shop?
Yes, don't judge.
No, no, no, I'm not judging, I'm just asking.
How long have you guys been going out?
A few weeks.
What's his last name?
His last name is Kennedy.
Yeesh, Kennedy.
Nothing good ever happens to the Kennedy's?
Dad!
No, I'm right.
I really want you to meet him.
Wow, so it must be serious.
Uh, yeah, it's serious.
So are you working on anything new?
Yeah, yeah, I'm glad you asked.
I might be up for promotion.
Really?
Yeah.
I mean, I'm still trying to work around a couple of things,
but I could be getting my own project.
Yeah?
So what we're doing, is we're upgrading
all of the code in the MindCrash app,
and then we're adding these little purple diamonds.
What they do is they open up all these portals,
but they take away your health.
Tricky programming.
That is so awesome, Dad.
Thanks, what about you?
How's the thing?
I'm okay I guess.
Good, good.
I'm just getting nervous.
About what?
Well, my insurance isn't gonna
fully cover the blood thinners anymore.
Yeah, so I'm worried
that I'm not gonna be able to afford them after next month.
Don't worry about it, I'm gonna pay for it.
Yeah, I don't think you get it.
They're really expensive.
Well, this raise that I'm gonna get
with the new promotion is gonna be a lot.
Like a lot, a lot.
So, it's gonna be enough that you're not gonna have to
stress about these corrupt medicine practices.
All right, you know what, where are the forks?
I am done!
Do you even have forks?
I don't know.
They're in a box somewhere.
Okay, you start on that one,
I'll go in that one.
All right.
Oh gosh.
This was so great, having you over here.
Thank you for helping me move.
Yeah, of course.
And maybe next weekend you can come back over
and we can have a little slumber party?
You know, maybe help me get unpacked a little,
and I can get you some pizza.
That sounds great,
but I'm actually busy with Zack that weekend.
Yeah, of course.
But you know what,
we can come over and see what you've done
like this week or next week.
Yeah, yeah, that's great.
Yeah.
All right.
Great.
Okay, call me if you need anything.
I love you, Dad.
I love you too sweetie.
Thanks for helping me move.
Uh-huh.
All right.
You've got a long drive ahead of you so drive safe.
I will.
- Bye. - Bye Dad.
Hey honey, I'm on my way home.
He's good.
He's...
I don't know, I'm worried about him.
I don't know.
I think he's really taking this whole divorce thing hard.
No, he's just, he's just been acting weird.
He was talking about pizza parties and shit.
I don't know, I'm just worried.
I know.
I told him that we'll come over and he can meet you.
Oh.
You're too sweet.
I love you, baby.
I'll see you soon.
Hey, good morning!
Hey, good morning.
Are you David Vanowen?
Yeah I am.
You weren't supposed to be here until four.
Yeah, well, I figured I'd come out here early.
Scope the landscape.
Okay.
See what needed to be done for your yard.
So you were saying that you wanted to use grass?
Yeah.
Yeah here and then,
well, once I get the septic put in over there.
Well who's doing your septic?
I am.
You're putting in your own septic?
Yeah, well, it's the only thing my old man
and I ever did together, believe it or not.
Yeah, well, the tank models have changed,
the pressure systems, you may need some help.
I think I can handle it.
All right.
Well, I'll be back in a week with everything I need
and we'll get your yard all tilled and plotted,
and see how you're coming along with your septic.
I should have it done by then.
Sounds good.
"Who's putting in your septic?"
Please.
Yo, Marky, Mark!
What's happening?
On my way with the beers, pal.
Sounds good, I'll see you there.
Man, I love the pool.
Yeah, it's really great, isn't it?
It's gonna be a nice little mini paradise back here.
My own slice of heaven.
You gonna put some grass around?
Oh yeah, yeah.
Grass all over this place,
and then with some white rocks back there,
make it feel like a show house feel.
Yeah.
Yeah, it'll be nice.
You know, my toilets are screwed up though.
That sucks.
Yeah, I gotta go and dig a hole for a new septic.
Shh, you're putting in your own septic?
It's the first of many things I've gotta do to this dump.
Are you sure that's a good idea?
Shouldn't you hire that out?
In a perfect world, yeah,
but septic's not that expensive
and it's about the only thing I can really do myself.
I thought with that new promotion
you were getting a big fat raise?
I haven't really been confirmed for that just yet.
Really.
I'm pretty confident I'm gonna get it,
but still, there's a couple of things I gotta work around.
I'm so confident, in fact,
I took on the whole damn mortgage myself.
So I'm gonna be fine.
Right.
I'm outta here.
You're taking off, you don't wanna stay
and help me clean the leaves out of the pool?
I'll pass.
I'll leave you to your septic.
You know, I'm putting it in right when you leave, right?
Sunday fun day.
Oh, and I'll see at Tuesday at Leo's.
Yeah, that sounds good.
Thanks brother.
Hey, thanks for the beers too.
You got it!
Shit.
Think I can't put in my own septic?
Get this bitch in.
What's this?
Whew!
Fuck!
Oh fuck!
Oh!
Shit.
Fuck!
What the hell?
There's a body in a box
in my backyard.
What are you doing?
Oh.
Oh God.
There's a body in a box in my backyard.
What's in your backyard?
Is there a body in your backyard?
Good morning!
What's up Davy Crockett?
What's up Richard?
You know, not much.
Just checking out Leonard's old office.
Word is it's getting cleaned out
for the next project manager.
Great.
Hope you're all settled in into cubicle land Dave.
Listen, dude, I've got a lot of stuff to do and I'm tired.
So just back off.
Do something else.
David.
Hey.
Hey, good morning, Mr. Wu.
David, David.
Your team knocked it out of the park.
Testers are loving the new update.
That is incredible.
That's great!
Here.
Let's take a walk.
Everything okay at home?
How's your daughter's-
- Oh, she's fine.
Good, good.
Anyways, David, this is the project manager's office.
I want this to be your view.
This is amazing.
I trust you're still on track for next Monday's deadline?
Absolutely.
David, aside from all this,
if you need to take a few personal days-
- I dunno.
Everything's under control Mr. Wu.
Great.
Well, if you need anything.
Thank you.
You know what, I actually,
I have to leave work early today
so I can take care of something at the bank.
What's that?
Just an account discrepancy.
Jesus.
All those bastards wanna do is steal your money.
- I know. - Right?
Banks.
Thank you Mr. Wu.
Oh.
Yeah!
And you say this inheritance
is two million dollars in cash?
It's something like that.
I mean, it could be.
He's not dead yet, Uncle Bill.
Well, if in fact upon his death,
he'd bequeaths you a cash sum that large
and you try to deposit it,
the banks will alert the department of treasury
and the IRS.
There are taxes, and most people start to ask questions.
That make sense.
I'd advise you to have your Uncle seriously consider
putting that money into a trust fund.
Oh yeah, I'll see what I can do to convince him.
Otherwise he will be hairy.
Big deposits are always hairy.
Thank you.
Jesus.
Shit.
Is what I'm doing wrong?
Shouldn't I just report this?
Why would you?
I don't even know who this guy is, he's dead.
What if they think it was me?
Hmm?
Why would you think that?
Someone will ask questions.
You don't have a police record,
there's absolutely nothing to tie it to this stiff.
I can't watch this.
God damn cats!
Jesus!
I saw you!
Hey, don't fuck with me, okay!
Hey Mark, is that you?
Quit fucking around.
Shit.
Did I forget to bury this?
Holy shit!
What the...
Hey David.
Hey Mr. Wu.
I've got some good news and bad news.
What's up?
Bad news first.
I need your team to push out that update two days early.
Well, that's,
that's gonna be really tough.
Exactly, that's the good news.
If you pull it off, you're a shoe in for project manager.
I've-
- This is the stuff that separates the boys from the men.
Either you step up to the plate or walk away.
Understood, sir.
Thank you.
Shit.
Guy sounds like a real dick.
Yeah, well he's got a point though.
Yeah, but doesn't he realize
you're going through a divorce?
But still, works gotta get done.
Are you okay?
I mean, I know we bro out a lot,
but you can tell me if something's
really eating at your heart.
What, yeah, everything's fine.
Really?
Could've fooled me, you've hardly touched your food.
Look man, I just have a lot on my mind.
Oh, like the divorce.
Yeah.
Yeah, the divorce, the job, the money.
The money?
Oh, like the promotion.
Yeah, yeah, the promotion.
Remember when we worked at Sega?
When we were kids.
Yeah.
Well, when we were in our mid 20s,
you pulled the same shit you're pulling now, okay.
You'd stress out over a job.
You acted the same way when the
softs crashed making the rodent.
This is not Sonic the fucking hedgehog!
Then what is it?
It's everything.
I just have so much on my plate that
the second I get everything under control,
something new, something huge fucking collides
with my already unstable life.
It's gonna be okay, man.
Just finish your beer and relax.
You know what, I'm just gonna go.
What?
Really?
I'll see you here Friday!
Yeah, yeah, of course.
Hey Dad.
Are you okay?
Right now?
I mean, Zack and I are hanging out.
Okay, okay, just for an hour.
Your Dad?
Yeah, I have to go see him.
Right now?
Yeah, just for an hour.
A little bit.
He doesn't sound normal.
Is everything okay?
I don't know.
Just wait for me, I'm sorry.
It's okay, hun.
See you in a bit.
Thank you.
Hey sweetie.
Hey Dad, what's going on?
Nothing.
I just really needed someone to confide in.
Of course.
I mean what's happening that you
needed me to be here right away?
Well,
something just happened that
I potentially could be sitting on top
of a whole lot of money.
Something at work?
No, no something totally different.
Okay Dad, you're a kind of scaring me.
I mean, yes, yeah.
It's something at work.
It's just a different job I've never done before,
so I'm kind of nervous about it.
And it pays well?
Yeah.
So then what's the problem?
I guess there is no problem.
I'm just,
I'm just kinda worried I'm gonna fail.
Come on, Dad.
Stop it, you'll be fine.
Yeah?
Is this all that you wanted to talk to me about?
Pretty much.
I still feel like there's something you're not telling me.
Well, I guess there's just a anxious,
anxiousness about it.
I mean, what if I mess it up and I fail
and then I can't afford the medicine that you need?
Dad, I know you have a lot on your plate,
I don't want my embolism to be part of that.
You don't need to worry about it.
But I do.
You taking off?
I have to get back to Zack.
Look, next time let's chat on the phone, okay?
Okay.
Am I still seeing you this weekend?
Yeah, I plan on stopping by possibly Sunday.
That's great.
I'm gonna bring Zack so he can meet you
and check out the new place.
That sounds wonderful.
Okay.
Hello boys.
Fuck!
Oh fuck!
Fuck you!
Oh my God,
you're spooking yourself, David.
Fucking cats.
Oh you fucking son of a bitch!
Shit.
Vanowen.
Hi, Mr. Wu, good morning.
What's up?
David, I wanted to see how your MindCrash
contribution is coming along.
Oh yeah, everything's great.
But you know how hard that purple diamond is to code?
It's really tricky.
Exactly, that's why I'm here to make sure
we're on track for success.
Okay.
I know you've been dealing with some personal issues.
Yeah, no, no, no, no.
My divorce has nothing to do with this.
Are you sure?
Yeah, yeah.
Everything's fine.
Good.
What are you hiding?
Hello.
Hey David, this is Allen from Twin Palms Landscapes.
How's it going?
It's good.
And how is that septic tank coming along?
It's great.
Listen, I'm a little, I got a bunch of stuff on my mind.
So what's up?
Yeah, no problem, sorry to bother you.
Listen, I just wanted to let you know
I'll be by on Friday around noon,
drop off a load of dirt and gravel for Monday.
That sounds great, thanks.
The hell.
Hey Raul, what's taking so long?
Come on, fill it up!
Friday.
Shit.
Shit, it's all still there.
Whoever you are.
Shit.
Hello.
Fucker!
Futuristic of Gaming, can I help you?
This is David.
I'm just calling to let you guys know
that I'm not gonna be coming in today.
Sorry, excuse me.
Yeah, I'm just not really feeling too well.
I think, yeah, yeah, probably the flu.
Yeah, I think I'm just gonna stay in.
Can you let everybody know that I'm
gonna be working from home today?
Huh?
How many days are you thinking you'll be gone for?
You know, I'm gonna be back tomorrow.
Don't worry about it, but please let Mr. Wu
and everybody know that I'm still
gonna be working from home today, okay?
All right, well, just whatever.
Keep me in the loop.
Thanks Whitney.
And I'll see you tomorrow.
I appreciate it.
Okay, you too, bye bye.
All right.
Try and stop me now, motherfucker.
All right.
Jesus!
Oh God!
Oh I'm in too deep.
Show yourself.
Show me, motherfucker.
What the fuck!
Shit!
No you don't!
You're not gonna get away from me this time!
Oh damn!
That son of a bitch!
Oh my God!
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
I'm gonna fucking!
Oh my God!
You son of a bitch!
Shit!
It's dug up again!
You're alive!
Stop fucking with me!
Open your eyes!
Open your fucking eyes!
Look at me!
Open your eyes!
Say it!
I'm alive!
Say it!
You're alive!
Say it!
Stop it!
Stop fucking with me!
Stop it!
Stop that fucking with me!
Stop!
Stop fucking with me!
Stop it!
Stop
fucking with me!
Shit!
Hey Dad, it's Jessica.
I just wanted to let you know
Zack is going to be there before me,
so don't be surprised.
David, where the hell are you?
I just saw, you!
I know I'm not crazy!
I know I'm not fucking crazy!
You stop!
Don't you get in that hole!
Don't you dare get in that fucking hole!
You fucking motherfucker!
You pussy!
I got you now!
I saw you!
I fucking saw you!
I know you are fucking alive!
You're alive you motherfucker!
I know you're fucking alive!
I know you're alive!
You son of a bitch!
You're alive!
You're not fucking dead!
Get up! Get up!
I saw you!
I fucking saw you!
Get up!
I'm not crazy!
You're so full of shit, I'm gonna prove it!
I know, I'm gonna fucking prove this shit!
Motherfucker!
David, I'm-
Oh my God.
What's that smell?
I mean, what is going on with you?
Is that blood?
Look at you!
You come into the office stinking, covered in blood!
I told you Wednesday that if you needed to take some
personal time, I'd give it to you.
I don't need personal time!
Do I look like I need personal time, Mr. Wu?
Stand down, David.
You know, I have worked at this company for years!
Everything's under control.
It's always been under control!
Can't you see that?
Everything is fine.
You need to take the rest of the day off.
Go home, David.
Take a shower, get some rest!
What?
What about my project?
Who the fuck's gonna do that?
We already transferred all of your
coding over to Peterson.
You'll get partial credit when the update releases.
Jesus Christ, David.
Did you put a cat in the blender?
Shut up Peterson!
You can't give the project to this guy!
He has no idea what he's doing!
I did.
It's done.
Go home.
We'll see you Monday.
Fuck
you.
Pack your shit, David.
What?
You'll get your severance package in the mail.
Goodbye.
Listen, you can't fire me.
I've worked here longer than anybody.
Do you know how long I've worked here?
Not as long as me, go home.
Whitney, security.
No, no Whitney!
You think I'm not just gonna leave?
Shit.
Stand back, David.
Well, you know what?
I don't need this job.
I don't need this job!
I don't
need this job!
I don't need this fucking job!
I'm never fucking working on an app again!
Just calm down.
You have the money at home.
You got three million dollars.
Three million dollars!
No one's ever gonna find out.
What's...
What the fuck is this?
Hey Allen!
Allen!
What's up!
You stay away from me!
Hey, no, Allen!
What is this?
That's nothing!
You stay away from me!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
You don't need to do that!
No, stay away from me!
- I'm calling 911! - No, no, no!
No, you don't need to call 'em!
Stay away!
- You don't need to call 'em! - Stay away!
No!
No, no, no stop!
Stop, stop, please!
Please stop!
Oh my God.
Oh shit.
Hey man.
Howdy.
Did you figure out how to spend that money yet?
Not yet.
Yeah, maybe a trip to Aruba.
Huh?
I don't even know where Aruba is.
That's okay.
Maybe you'll got a second house.
Possibly a rental property?
Maybe.
You know Allen was trying to take your money, right?
Sure.
Think about it.
You're right.
When am I wrong?
You're spooking yourself again, David.
Where is he?
It's almost half-time.
What the fuck?
I'm gonna knock those fucking eyes out of your head!
David!
Whoa!
David, what are you doing!
It's me, Mark!
Will you knock it off!
What the fuck!
I know you're here to take my money!
I know it!
What money!
Why are you here!
I called you, you wouldn't answer your phone!
I was wondering what...
What the fuck!
David!
Fuck it, I have this fucking money.
Everybody gotta, shit.
Okay, okay.
It goes red, black, red, black, those are the rules.
No matter what, you can't just change the rules.
No, no, no that is how it works.
It's exactly how it works.
Well you know what?
Fuck your mom.
Nobody's coming for you tonight, don't worry about it.
Everything's under control.
Just king me.
King me.
This is where he runs out.
Rico.
My favorite, favorite part.
Don't miss this.
Oh yeah, that's Steven Adler
from Guns and Roses right there.
Hey, get that out of your mouth, Rico.
He just gave a blowjob for some coke.
Oh, there comes Jeffrey Dahmer.
'Cause you're very special to me, Rico.
You always have been.
Now, I need you to do something for me.
Okay Rico?
Hi Mr. Van Owen, I'm Zack Kennedy.
I'm Jess's boyfriend.
Actually, Jess-
I know who you are!
You're here to take my money!
Hey, Jess.
Is everything okay?
You look a little tired, like you haven't eaten.
Ah, I'm fine.
Is Zack here?
Zack?
My boyfriend.
He was supposed to stop by.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, the sandwich guy.
Yeah, yeah, he's here.
He came in, he didn't even introduce himself.
He just made himself at home.
- Really? - Yeah.
That doesn't really sound like Zack.
It's crazy, he's downstairs in the basement.
The basement?
Yeah, come on, let me show you.
He's in the basement, right here.
It's down here, remember the closet within a closet?
Yeah.
It leads to a creepy basement.
Why would Zack be in a creepy basement?
Go ahead.
I'm fine.
Go, go go.
Wait a minute.
He's right down here.
Come on, come on, come on.
Right over there.
No, no, no, it's good, it's good.
It's great, it's great.
What is this?
Dad?
Why are you doing this?
I know why you're here.
What?
I know you're here to take my money.
What?
What money?
I know you're here to take what I found.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Let me go!
Please, let me go!
Oh my God, Jesus!
Dad, you have to untie him!
He's going to die!
You're gonna tell me when the others will come!
What others?
Just tell me!
This is not you!
Please, please!
Dad, I'm your daughter, I'm Jessica!
I don't know about your money!
I just came to see you!
I'm your daughter, Dad!
Jessica.
Oh my God, Jessica.
I am so sorry.
I am.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
I know how to fix this.
I'll fix it, okay.
Are you gonna unchain me?
No, no, no, just hold on.
No, wait, wait, wait!
Dad, please!
Please Dad, please help me!
Please, Dad, don't leave me!
The best thing that you're gonna have in this whole life,
is gonna be yourself.
It's gonna be you and everything that you're able to do
for other people.
Don't leave me here!
And if you do something like that,
every single day,
you're gonna have a magical life.
Because every single person that you meet.
Please, please, no, no, no!
Well, they're gonna understand,
you're the person to go to.
You're the one with the good ideas.
Somebody help me, please!
You're the one who's a plus
in a whole world of negatives.
So every day you guys get up and go out there,
I want you to be a plus.
Be somebody that goes
into every room,
every door
every situation,
with a smile
and a plus.
Somebody help me!
Please!
Help me!
Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull