It's showtime, folks!
-Just give me some room. Ready. -Ready.
-Ready.
We interrupt this program to bring you the following special news report.
Here is Paul Michaels.
Good morning.
A dramatic situation is unfolding
in the Central American country of Panama today,
where four US soldiers appear to have been taken hostage
during anti-American riots in the capital city.
We take you now to the Rose Garden of the White House,
where President Reagan is expected to give remarks any moment now.
Ladies and gentlemen,
yesterday's act of terrorism,
in which four American soldiers were taken hostage in Panama City
by proxies of the Soviet Union,
was a horrifying reminder of the enemies we face.
We will not allow the Soviet Union to undermine peace and freedom
on earth or in space.
Let me be clear, the United States will not be intimidated.
Wish Houston would find room on the next Sea Dragon
for some new rover springs.
My ass feels like a piñata.
Pretty sure lithium mining gear takes priority over your ass.
Couldn't we have found the mother lode closer to Jamestown?
Quit your whining. If the American taxpayers wanted us to--
What the hell? Hey, isn't that our gear?
What's it doing way up here?
I don't know. Better go have a look-see.
Everybody, sit tight. Keep your eyes open.
-Don, you're on me. -Roger.
Jamestown, geo crew two, come in.
Geo two, Jamestown. Go ahead.
We're on the south ridge above 357 Bravo,
and we've got a... situation over here.
What kind of situation?
Goddamn Russkies took our mining site.
Can you repeat that, geo two?
All our transmissions are encrypted.
The only way the Soviets know about the lithium content on the site
is they cracked our code.
Don't we change out the encryption keys?
Every month, per protocol.
Apparently the Soviets found a way around that too.
I've just spoken with the president.
He's decided not to bring this to the United Nations Security Council.
So, he's just gonna let the Soviets take our mining site?
No, he's not gonna do that either. He wants us to take it back.
As in--
As in, go in, replace their equipment with ours and swap out the flag again,
but this time we hold it.
We hold it?
The National Security Council debated every other option.
But the consensus was that if the Soviets retain control of 357 Bravo,
it would set a dangerous precedent.
We let this go, and then there'll be nothing to stop Andropov
from moving in and taking over all our other lunar claims.
I have to say I agree.
Hundreds of man-hours went into finding that vein,
and if it's even half as rich as these initial readings show,
it could be a game changer for our energy storage at Jamestown.
Tom, just let me make sure that I'm clear here.
You're saying that the president wants us to confront the Soviets on the moon.
No, no, no. Not confront.
The president's not interested in a confrontation.
But, from what we can tell,
the Russians don't have the ability to occupy the site continuously.
So, when they leave for the day, we move in.
But this time we stay.
We could send out a team of astronauts, two at a time, to monitor the site.
How long can two guys stay out there?
The recharge tanks on the rovers
can stretch the PLSS backpacks up to ten hours.
So we could have three teams monitoring the site round the clock.
So, you guys wanna have a permanent security detail?
Essentially.
And this security detail, they're gonna need weapons, right?
Weapons? Wait.
No one said anything about sending weapons to the moon.
Well, forgive me, but what do you expect these guys to do, exactly?
When things get hairy, I mean.
What, are they gonna ask the Soviets to leave nicely?
Maybe hit 'em over the head with a baseball bat?
Golf club, maybe? Plenty of those up there.
Wait, hold on.
Are the two of you seriously suggesting we send guns to the moon?
You're telling me the president wants us to hold that site.
And I'm telling you that means we're going to need security.
And security means guns.
No. That is absolutely out of the question.
-I know it seems extreme-- -It's absurd!
-There's gotta be another solution. -As in literally any other solution.
What about imposing additional economic sanctions against Moscow?
An embargo?
That was our response after Berlin last year.
And then the Russians just increased trade with Latin America,
which increased and strengthened their influence in this hemisphere.
And given what's going on with Panama right now,
I'd say that is the last thing we need.
You can't seriously think this is a good idea?
Look, General Bradford's right.
Any kind of squeeze we put on the Soviets down here... take time.
Longer we wait...
the harder it's gonna be to reclaim that site.
If we could modify weapons to be used in the lunar environment,
none of our astronauts are qualified to use them.
-Marines? -I was thinking the same thing.
Thinking what, exactly?
Well, every marine aviator has to qualify as an infantry officer
before they attend flight school.
So, they're the only astronauts with training in ground combat and tactics.
Wait.
Now we're sending marines to the moon?
Can we-- Can we do that?
Well, we have to develop procedures
for safety and operations in the lunar environment.
We should be able to bring them up to speed fairly quickly.
There has to be another way.
Believe me, I don't like this idea any more than the rest of you.
But here's the truth.
We cannot hold site 357 Bravo without armed security.
Now, I'm open to new ideas,
but it seems to me we really don't have much choice.
The only way to hold a piece of ground,
on this world or any other world,
is a man with a rifle.
Nelson's right.
We all need to be in agreement here.
'Cause once we do this thing...
there's no going back.
Good morning, Mrs. Cleveland.
Marta, what time is it?
Seven o'clock.
Oh, shit.
Shit! Shit!
I told Sam to wake me up before he left.
I gotta be in the SIM in an hour. Christ.
Marta, honey, can you do me a favor?
Can you call JSC and tell them the car has a flat, and I'm gonna be late.
Which car?
You know, the car.
My car. All the cars.
Tell them all the cars have flats.
You know what, I really don't give a shit what you tell them,
just... tell them I'm gonna be late, all right?
Yes, ma'am.
You have a phone message from Mr. Stevens.
It sounded important.
Oh, no, I'm sure it is important.
It's always important to Gordo. Thanks.
Shit.
In the event--
Sorry.
That's all right, Captain Stevens. Take a seat.
As I was saying, a program patch can be sent up if necessary
and loaded into the GPCs.
Normally after MECO...
You're outta uniform, Captain.
Had a little malfunction.
Malfunction?
The zipper broke.
I'm-- I'm sure it probably just shrank in the dryer.
Very funny.
...preserve engine lifetime by minimizing the number of engine starts.
For critical burns, or for large velocity changes, both OMS pods are used.
If there is a significant main engine performance problem...
You've never used a laptop before, have you?
I've used a laptop.
On performance-critical missions, an OMS assist burn during nominal ascent
can add about 250 pounds to payload capacity.
In the case of a lunar mission, the orbiter carries...
And I didn't schedule any college tours before noon on Monday.
But I was thinking that we could have breakfast
and then visit Colonial Williamsburg
before we head to Georgetown and American University.
So, anyway, on Tuesday, I was thinking we could drive through Monticello--
Mom?
Okay, this is probably too much history. I'm sorry.
No, it all sounds really fun. It's just... I had a suggestion.
Yeah, of course, anything. It's your trip, sweetheart.
Well, I was wondering if we could go...
to...
Baltimore?
Annapolis. The Naval Academy.
Well, that-- that--
that's really sweet that you wanna visit your father's school, but--
you know, it is-- it's awfully far out of the way, and I just--
I don't think we're gonna have time, with the schedule we have, to go.
I don't just wanna visit.
I wanna apply there.
You--
You wanna apply to the Naval Academy?
Look, I know it's different from all the schools we've been talking about,
but I think it's a good fit for me.
Kelly, why on earth would you want to apply to Annapolis of all places?
Look, I didn't just come up with this, Mom.
I've been thinking about it for a long time.
And this is the first that I'm hearing about it.
Kelly, it's the navy. You wanna-- You wanna join the navy.
Yes.
Why?
I want to serve my country.
Don't. Don't give me that crap.
All right? There's plenty of ways to serve your country. You tell me why.
Okay.
I wanna fly.
Tomcats, F-14s.
It's a fighter-bomber.
I know what a Tomcat is, Kelly. All right?
It's open, Davey.
It's not Davey.
Well, come in here anyway. I need some help.
Like, now. Please.
Okay.
Could you grab a roll of toilet paper from the kitchen?
It's top shelf, left, above the sink.
Got it.
Thank you.
-Sorry about that. -No problem.
So, who are ya? What do you want?
I'm looking for Aleida Rosales.
Yeah, that's me.
Look, if you're here to collect a bill, I know my rights,
and your entry into this vehicle is under false pretenses.
You did not identify yourself or your intentions.
Aleida, it's Margo.
Hi.
What are you doing here? How did you...
I got a call from your boyfriend. Davey.
Oh, my God.
He told me about your... problem.
Oh, my God.
That was so totally inappropriate. I'm...
I'm fine, okay? This is-- This is just...
He said you were gonna be deported.
I... tried to call first.
Yeah, phone's disconnected, I know.
Power's next, then water. Water's always the last thing to go.
-Do you still play? -Play what?
No.
Look, Aleida, I--
I thought I knew what I was gonna say, but now...
all I wanna do is say I'm sorry--
No. Don't do that. Okay?
-Okay. -"Sorry." That's not--
I'm not looking for that, okay?
I don't know what I'm looking for, but it's not that.
-Okay. -What'd he tell you?
Not much.
Said your residency status under Reagan's amnesty program was about to be revoked.
Yup.
Gotta keep a job to stick around.
But people don't seem to like hiring me. Did he tell you that?
-He mentioned it. -Yeah, 'cause I'm a bad employee.
A bad coworker. A bad team player.
A brilliant engineer.
I made a few calls.
All of your former employers,
they all went out of their way to say how gifted you were,
even as they acknowledged your... behavioral issues.
Behavioral issues, right. That's just bullshit.
I didn't set fire to McDonnell Douglas, okay?
It was just a trash can in that asshole's office,
and they put it out in, like, five seconds.
I know. And that...
asshole said you were the best engineer he'd seen in the last 30 years.
What do you want, Margo?
I won't...
I can't go back and try and explain why I did what I did ten years ago.
Thank you. 'Cause it was humiliating enough the first time around.
But I can offer you a job.
At NASA.
As what, a janitor?
Yeah, sorry to break it to you, but I'm not in the family business anymore.
Systems engineer.
You'll be working on a fairly low-priority mission.
Nothing glamorous, but...
it'll give you your sea legs.
And it'll keep you in the country.
Poor Aleida.
This is not charity.
Poor little Mexican girl.
You know, she got a big job at NASA 'cause Margo Madison took pity on her.
-I didn't come here out of pity. -Guilt's a close cousin.
You're an engineer, and we need engineers.
Rationalization.
You were closer with guilt.
I do have guilt over what happened. I have for a long time.
But that's my problem, not yours.
Your problem is your residency status. I'm offering you a way to deal with it.
It doesn't make up for what happened back then...
but it's a way out. Today.
If you want the job, report to the personnel office at JSC.
Think you know which building it's in.
If you wanna cut off your nose to spite your face,
then fine, be that way.
All I can do is offer you the job.
There's nothing else that I can do.
I gave you the opportunity, and if you don't want it, then fine.
Be a brat. Be stubborn.
I...
Look, all I'm saying is,
Jamestown learns about the high lithium content at 357 Bravo,
and within two days the Russians take over the site.
In your report, you stated that after you launched to rescue Commander Wilson,
Cosmonaut Vasiliev remained at Jamestown. Alone.
Now, either our cryptography is more vulnerable than we ever suspected, or...
maybe they got ears inside our base.
-You think maybe he'd plant a device? -No.
No, there wasn't enough time. It all happened so fast.
You were in an emotionally vulnerable place.
And God knows you had every right to be. You'd just lost a son.
You hadn't slept or eaten for days.
You had stacks of unanswered communiqués.
Now, surely all of this was visible to him.
So all I'm asking you is,
don't you think that there is the slightest chance that maybe,
just maybe...
our enemies might've taken advantage of that?
Alex, can we get a status check on that systems diagnostic?
Any abnormalities so far?
That's a negative, Houston.
-So far everything checks out. -Copy that.
Hey, we're sending a new shipment of movies up this month.
-Anything you're interested in? -Never thought you'd ask.
Matter of fact, we're all a little bummed up here.
We're not gonna be on earth when that Mercury 7 movie comes out.
The Right Stuff.
They made a movie out of that?
Yeah. Looks decent too.
Think we can get an advanced copy up here?
I'll see what we can do.
Hey, Alex, one more thing.
Have you had any trouble with any minor systems since we scrammed the reactor?
We got a heads-up from HAB SYS
that you might start experiencing some efficiency issues
with the overhead lights.
It's an affirm, Houston. Lights have been a little finicky lately.
Roger that. We'll look into it. Houston out.
Yes, Mr. President, budget's on track,
launch schedule at Vandenberg shaping up nicely.
Oh, and one more thing,
the Soviets have had ears on our base for the last nine years.
If you'll excuse me, I have a very unpleasant phone call to make.
Hey.
Hi. How's it going?
You know. Same old, same old.
What'll you have?
Bourbon on the rocks.
So, that's it? That's all I get? "What'll you have?"
-What? -My...
-Oh, my goodness! Tracy! -All right, there she is.
-I'm sorry, I forgot! I'm sorry. -Okay, thank God! I was wondering.
-Congratulations! -Thank you.
-Congratulations. -Thank you.
Okay, let's see-- let's see this ring. Holy...
-Oh, my goodness! -Yeah.
-What? -I know! He did good.
And you two together, that's...
that's really incredible.
-It is amazing, I mean... -Cheers to that.
I'm over the moon, just like they say.
You deserve it. Cheers.
Thank you.
You know,
you're one of the few people that actually seem happy for me.
-Come on, that can't be true. -Oh, my God.
I'm getting the stink eye all over JSC.
It's like I needed Gordo's approval or something.
Have you talked to him recently?
What's going on?
No, Tracy. Not my place, I'm...
All right, all right. Well, enough about him.
What's going on with you?
When I came in here, you were a million miles away.
Kelly told me she wants to go to Annapolis.
I mean, I don't know. I still feel like I'm in shock about it all.
And I feel like I'm in shock that I'm in shock.
Like, I should've seen this coming.
-I mean, she grew up around Ed. -Yeah.
And his job. And of course that's what she would wanna do.
She grew up in this place, and she had... you.
You know, honestly.
Hey, you've inspired a lot of young women, Tracy.
And it's really incredible, and you should be proud of that.
You know, I just...
I just-- I don't want that life for my daughter.
Yeah, I get it.
So-- So what'd you tell her?
I just shut her down and said we weren't gonna talk about it, you know?
'Cause that's what great moms do.
Hey, you know what, cut yourself some slack, all right?
Your daughter just told you that she wanted to join the navy.
I mean, that is a big deal.
I mean, hell, when I told my mama I wanted to learn how to fly,
she didn't speak to me for months.
And you hated her for it, right?
I got over it. And I had my brother teach me for 25 bucks.
But you know what, that's who I was. That's who I am.
No one was gonna tell me any differently.
That's kinda my point, Karen.
If Kelly really wants to do this, she is gonna do it.
She's gonna find a way to do it, with or without you.
So, you know...
you might wanna start making peace with it now.
I don't-- I don't know how to do that, Tracy.
I don't. Every time I think about it,
I think if something happens to her, I don't feel like I can survive that.
-I just-- I can't. I can't do that. -I know.
The way I see it...
we're the ones that brought them up in this fucked-up world.
Least we can do is... let them go live in it.
We owe them that much.
Yeah, we do.
Yeah?
Gordo?
Trace?
You left a message.
Yeah. Yeah, that's right.
I had something that I wanted to talk to you about.
She keeps staring at me.
What? Who?
Me.
Okay.
I came around the curve, and it was like...
I just appeared.
You're not really making a whole lot of sense, Trace.
You okay?
Yeah. I just-- I got in a little bit of a car accident.
Jesus.
I'm fine. Fine.
Car is fucked though.
-Not your Porsche. -Yup, that's the one.
Come pick me up.
It's, like, two o'clock in the morning.
Wait a minute. Why don't you get your husband to come and get you, Trace?
He's outta town for work.
Can you just--
Can you just do me this favor and--
and come and get me, Gordo?
What should I do about the car?
Sure Sam will buy you a new one.
Sam. He's such a good guy.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
He has a bit of a temper, but, you know, you really gotta push him.
You know what I mean?
He's not like you.
You're easy.
-Yeah. I'm easy. -Yeah.
Oh, no, no, no.
Don't-- Don't--
-Don't take me back to my house. -What?
-Take me-- Take me to our old place. -Why?
I'm sick of the staff treating me like some teenager coming in past curfew.
Gordo. Pull over.
-What? -Gordo!
Yeah.
All right.
Here we go.
Boys are both home tonight,
so gonna have to sack it out on the couch, all right?
Trace?
Shit.
I guess I'll take the couch.
Well, I had to do something.
Couldn't just let them haul you off to Mexico.
So you decided to call the one person you knew I didn't wanna call.
The one person I never wanted to ask a favor of. Ever.
I'm sorry. I didn't wanna lose you.
I guess I panicked. It was the only thing I could think of.
Really? You didn't think to call a temp agency? Or Bruce? Or--
Bruce? My boss?
Yeah, you said he needed some help.
Okay. So, you'd rather work on an oil rig than be an engineer at NASA?
And what if I fuck it up?
-Why would you fuck it up? -Because I'm a fuckup.
I've been fired from every job I've ever had.
Boeing, Abbott, McDonnell Douglas.
But this is NASA.
You've dreamed about working here since you were a little kid.
So why ruin it by letting them tell me I'm a piece of shit,
just like everywhere else?
Oh, come on.
I mean, you really think Margo Madison would come all the way down here
and offer you a job
if she didn't think you could cut it?
She knows how talented you are.
And so do I.
I mean... you were born to do this, babe.
You know you were--
Okay, okay. Shut up already.
I'll do it.
Really?
-I'm so happy for you, babe! -No.
What-- What do you mean, "no"?
We're done, Davey.
I'm sorry, you're--
-Are you breaking up with me? -Yeah, I am.
But you're taking the job.
Your dream job, that I helped you get.
-By going behind my back. -I was just--
Okay, look... look, I know you're upset.
I was humiliated in front of that woman again.
Something I swore I would never let happen.
And then it did... because of you.
I'm not getting over that.
Ever.
Your shit's in the box.
Take it and don't come back.
An American.
-This is America! -Shut up!
You were in an emotional, vulnerable place.
Surely all of this was clearly visible to him.
And God knows you had every right to be.
You'd just lost a son.
...vulnerable place.
Gordo, the taxi's on its way, so...
Hey, Gordo.
Morning.
Morning. I'm looking for my keys to the house and...
can't find them.
Oh, shit. I hope I didn't lose them in the field, or in the car.
Nah, you didn't leave 'em.
I took them.
You what?
I took the keys to this place off your key ring.
Okay, look, I don't have time to do this right now.
Can you just give me back my keys, please?
Believe me, I would,
but last time I checked, they fit these locks.
And these locks are attached to this house.
And this house is attached to my name.
-So technically they're my keys. -Nah, the house is under our name.
That's another thing.
Aren't you supposed to change that when you get remarried?
Why are you still Tracy Stevens?
'Cause I'm a public figure now, Gordo. People just know me as Stevens.
Right.
Astronaut Tracy Cleveland.
Yeah, guess it doesn't have quite the same ring.
You know what? I don't know what the hell's gotten into you this morning.
Just give me my goddamn keys. Please.
You don't live here, Trace.
My children live here, Gordo.
And you can come and see 'em anytime you want.
All you gotta do is pick up the phone.
Is that what this is about? Me not returning your call?
No, it's not.
But I'm glad you brought that up,
because I do have something to tell you that I thought you might wanna know.
All right, let me have it.
I'm going back to the moon.
You? Back to the moon?
That's right.
Decided it was time to get my shit together and get back on the horse.
Just like that.
Ed put me back in training for Jamestown 91.
Good for you.
Columbia will be taking me back in September.
September?
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to the moon in a couple weeks on Discovery.
I'll still be there in September.
That's why I called.
See, I wanted you to hear it from me.
Not with the rest of the world on some television show.
-Television? -Yeah.
Does NASA Public Affairs know about this?
No idea. Probably.
Oh, God damn it.
I am not doing the "space couple" bullshit again.
All right? Not after all I've accomplished.
That's your reaction? You're worried about publicity?
I'm not gonna play the "astro-wife," okay?
And Ed-- Of course. Ed just smiles and says, "That's fine."
You know what? He's in for a rude awakening, Gordo.
I'm going back to space after ten years, Trace.
All you can think of is how it affects your press clippings?
-This is bullshit! It's absolute bullshit. -All right, settle down now.
I will not have everything I've worked for be made into some kind of joke.
What is this?
"Tracy and Gordo finally on the moon together, after all these years?"
I won't have it, Ed. I will not.
Look, no one is talking about any of that stuff.
Don't treat me like a child.
I know how things work around here.
Gordo comes crying to you about some flight assignment,
and you figure, why not throw a pity party for my friend on the moon
while giving Shorty Powers his wet dream at the same time?
I make crew decisions based on what I think is best for this program.
Bullshit. You make crew decisions based on your golf score
and how big a dump you took that day.
You're way outta line.
I will not be made a laughingstock in front of the entire world
as "astro-wife" again.
This has nothing to do--
Bounce him off the flight, Ed.
Just bounce him off the flight!
All right?
He has been a washed-up has-been for the last ten years.
It will not kill him if he doesn't go on for two more months.
Gordo's flight is set.
End of story.
You want off your flight, just say the word, Trace.
Just say the word.
But don't expect to get another slot for a good long time.
Not while I'm running this office.
Boys will be boys, huh?
Y'all just stick together no matter what, don't you?
In or out, Trace?
I'm in, Ed.
I'm always in.
Kelly?
Hi. You... got a minute?
Sure.
Everything okay?
Yeah.
Kelly, I need you to tell me--
I want you to tell me that this is really what you want.
Yes. It's really what I want.
And it's not a whim?
Or because Danny Stevens looks cute in his uniform--
Mom, no.
It's something I've wanted for a while.
Ever since we've been talking about it, I just...
realize I don't wanna be stuck in some library writing essays for four years.
Okay? I wanna-- I wanna do something with my life.
I wanna make a difference in the world.
Like Dad.
He's...
Yeah.
Trust me, I know.
I've lived with Ed Baldwin for many years, you know.
But he's paid a heavy toll though, for being Ed Baldwin.
It's not a normal life.
It is a lot of stress.
And exhaustion. And danger.
You know, he missed a lot of things too. He did.
He missed time... with-- time with me and time with--
He just-- He-- He missed a lot.
Like Shane?
Yes.
He missed a lot of time with Shane.
Where-- Where did you find this?
Back there. Just before you came in.
This was his favorite.
Popeye.
I always knew this was his room.
And sometimes I thought he was listening to me.
Not in a bad way or anything, just a presence.
It sounds dumb.
No, it doesn't.
I used to think the same thing.
I did. You know, it was so hard to come in here at first.
And we thought about selling the house and moving away, and...
and then you came along.
And everything was different.
Like it was okay now that there was life in here again.
Okay.
Okay. Annapolis.
-Let's do it. -Really? Are you sure?
You're gonna take ten years off my life.
But your father's gonna get a kick out of the football games, so it's--
Thank you! Thank you!
I love you.
But I loved them.
-Looking forward to that. -Hello.
-Hi! -Hi, Dad.
Long day?
Got off to a bad start.
But what is this? An actual dinner at home?
-Yeah. -Special occasion?
Well, you could say that.
Your daughter decided on her number one school.
From your mood, I'm guessing William & Mary?
No, actually. But that is still on the list, right?
Definitely. Just not number one.
You gonna keep me in suspense here or what?
Tell him.
The Naval Academy.
Very funny. Come on, tell me.
Really.
It's Annapolis.
No.
What? Why?
Because I said you're not going.
That's not a reason. Can't we at least discuss this?
-Go to your room. -Go to my room?
No, Ed, she's not a child, okay?
Look, this isn't up for debate. The answer's no!
Dad, I get to have some say in this.
I said no! Okay, we're done here! End of story!
-Edward, you need to stop right there. -What was that?
Since when do we not talk about things?
Just stop right now, all right? We need to talk about this as a family.
This is not happening!
-We thought you would be happy about this. -Yeah? Well, you were wrong!
Dad, this is my life we're talking about.
Well, you're still living under my roof, young lady.
-What the hell does that mean? -Hey, watch your mouth!
Hey, Ed, watch your tone right now, all right?
I don't know what has gotten into you.
I'm the head of this house, and I don't need to explain myself to either of you!
This is my decision, not yours! I don't need your permission to apply!
I just so happen to know the superintendent of the academy,
and if I just pick up that phone,
I guarantee you that application will never see the light of day!
This is outrageous, all right? You can't do that!
I can, and I will!
Great! Then you know what?
I'm just gonna go down to the recruiting office, and I'll join the navy!
A couple years go by, and I'll apply to Annapolis as an enlisted sailor.
Fine. Then pack your bags and don't come back!
Hey! Don't you say that! You take that back! Right now!
I don't know what the fuck has gotten into you! God damn it! Don't fucking say that!
Stop! Everybody just stop! Enough!
Now, whatever that was, we're not doing it anymore.
Okay.
Okay?
Okay.
-Okay. Okay. -Okay.
Oh, no. I'm sorry, I...
I don't know why I said that. I don't want you to leave.
No, we don't. We-- Please don't leave.
I'm not. I'm not going anywhere, Mom.
It's all right. It's gonna be all right.
No one is going anywhere.
Okay, what we're gonna do is calm down and talk about what's going on.
Dad.
What was that all about?
I-- I don't know. I just...
I just... suddenly reacted.
I thought you'd be proud of me.
I should. I would, of course. Of course I would.
I just-- It wasn't...
That's not what-- It's just not--
Ed, whatever it is, say it.
I just got this...
sudden, overwhelming...
feeling, like I was...
gonna lose you.
Dad, you're not losing me. It's just college. I can always--
No, I don't...
mean like that. I meant...
lose you like...
Like Shane.
Yeah.
Like Shane.
Hey.
I know. I had the same feeling.
I did, Ed.
But Shane died because he was riding his bike down a street.
There's no safe place on this earth.
I know, but that's the point. 'Cause I wasn't on this earth.
I wasn't here when it happened. I was gone.
I wasn't here for him. I wasn't here for you. I--
I couldn't protect you. Couldn't-- Couldn't do anything.
Except for curl up in my bunk and scream into the night.
And I...
I promised myself that I would never let that happen again.
I...
I was always gonna be there for you and Kelly.
No matter what the cost, no matter what I had to give up,
this time I was gonna stay...
and protect you both.
Ed...
Ed, do you think it was your fault?
Look at me.
Do you?
He was angry with me. And I wasn't there.
No. Hey, no. No, no, no.
It was an accident.
Okay? An accident.
I can't tell you how many nights I laid in bed going over that day,
wondering, if I had done something different...
you know, maybe...
But you can't do that.
You can't, because it's torture.
That's what it is.
It's a way of punishing ourselves, hoping that...
you know, after enough torture, something good will come out of it.
Like penance.
You know, if you say enough Hail Marys, your sins will be washed away and--
you know, enough penance and maybe you'll finally pay God's price
for bringing Shane back.
But that's not true.
He's not coming back.
And his death... was not my fault.
And it was not yours either.
Okay?
It wasn't your fault.
Come here.
Popeye?
I found it.
Today.
You're kidding?
I remember when you told me that you wanted to join the Naval Academy.
I thought, "What the hell is a boy from Gary, Indiana,
who's never seen the ocean, gonna do in the navy? That's crazy."
The next thing I knew, you were in the navy.
And I was in the navy.
And our son wanted to be in the navy.
And now it turns out our daughter wants to be in the navy too.
We are the Baldwins.
You cut us, and we're gonna bleed blue and fucking gold.
God help us all.
Anchors aweigh
Oh, goodness, no. No, no, no.
-Anchors aweigh -No. Ed.
Farewell to college joys
We sail at break of day-ay-ay-ay
Through our last night on shore
Drink to the foam
Until we meet once more
Here's wishing you a happy voyage home
Jesus.