‐ Previously on "New Amsterdam"...
‐ Somebody reported that you
have a problem with Adderall.
‐ You're asking me if I've ever risked a patient's life
because I'm stoned.
‐ Yeah, and you haven't answered the question.
‐ What do you think would happen
if you stopped helping people? Who would they see?
‐ They would see a corny, nerdy,
fat, worthless nothing.
‐ All right, since you all prescribe 79% of our opioids,
I am giving you one year
to prescribe 79% less,
and anyone who doesn't will be fired.
[dramatic music]
‐ I think they're clean.
‐ The damage to his heart was extensive.
The virus also ravaged the surrounding heart muscle.
‐ How bad?
‐ Even if you found the best heart surgeon in the world,
I'm not sure it'd be enough.
[Andrew Bird's "Three White Horses"]
‐ ♪ There'll be three white horses ♪
♪ All in a line ♪
♪ There'll be three white horses ♪
♪ In a line ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Three white horses ♪
♪ When you go that way ♪
♪ You will need somebody ♪
♪ When you come to die ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Don't dismiss it ♪
♪ Like it's easy ♪
♪ Tell me what's so easy ♪
♪ About coming to say goodbye? ♪
♪ You're gonna miss her ♪
♪ In the evening ♪
‐ Hey. ‐ Yeah?
‐ Dr. Reynolds.
I used to work here.
‐ Hospital ID?
‐ No, but I should be in the system.
‐ ♪ There'll be three white horses ♪
‐ Oh, thank you.
‐ ♪ When you go that way ♪
♪ You will need somebody ♪
♪ When you come to die ♪
♪ It's not desperation ♪
♪ That we're breeding ♪
♪ It's just a need we're feeding ♪
♪ Before you say goodbye ♪
♪ You're gonna miss me ♪
♪ In the evening ♪
‐ [sighs]
‐ ♪ Somebody when you come to die ♪
♪ You know all you need is ♪
♪ Somebody when you ♪
♪ Come to die ♪
‐ So?
‐ I can't operate.
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪
Here's Vijay's cardiac echo.
‐ What do you mean "can't operate"?
‐ His mitral valve, it's greater than 60% regurgitation.
That's secondary to a ruptured papillary muscle.
‐ I didn't fly you out here to not operate.
‐ Listen, his EF is under 20%.
These numbers aren't even compatible with life.
‐ Right, which is exactly why you need to fix the valve.
‐ I can't fix it because the virus has damaged
the heart muscle around the valve.
There's nothing to sew a new valve into.
‐ Doing nothing isn't an option.
‐ I didn't say I was doing nothing.
Look, I'm gonna use a catheter. ‐ TAVR?
‐ All right, I'm gonna place a clip...
‐ A clip?
‐ Into the mitral's weakened area‐‐that should fix it.
‐ He's dying, Floyd. He needs surgery.
‐ Okay, look, you brought me here because of my expertise,
and because you trust me. [beeper beeping]
Right now my expertise is saying this.
‐ I gotta go.
‐ What happened to "How can I help?"
‐ The virus hit us hard. Nothing's the same.
‐ My hospital had three.
‐ Three what?
‐ Only three deaths.
I feel guilty just saying it.
‐ Don't. You were spared.
I wish we were.
Especially Lauren.
It hit her the worst.
[somber music]
♪ ♪
[knocking on door]
[knocking continues]
‐ Candelario's on! ‐ Dr. Bloom, it's Gladys.
‐ Get Candelario! ‐ It's about Iggy.
[dramatic music]
‐ I'm on my way out.
♪ ♪
‐ He's sweaty, wobbly on his feet.
‐ Did he take a COVID test?
‐ PCR came back negative,
but he can hardly stand.
♪ ♪
[knocks]
‐ Ig?
‐ Hey. ‐ Hey.
‐ What brings you down to the‐‐ Ooh.
‐ Aw, God, Gladys was right. You gotta go home.
‐ No, I just‐‐ I stood up too fast.
I got a head rush. ‐ You're valor is noted,
but if you've got the flu, you gotta go.
‐ I don't have the flu, I'm just‐‐I'm tired.
‐ You're color's not great.
‐ Lauren, if I feel anything flu‐y, I'll, uh...
[sighs] ‐ Hey.
‐ I'll page you. ‐ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Hey, come on, come on. Sit down.
‐ No, no, I'm fine.
I just‐‐I haven't eaten.
‐ Since when?
‐ [clears throat]
‐ Hey. How many meals?
‐ [sighs]
‐ How many days?
‐ Two.
Maybe three.
‐ Hi.
I thought you might enjoy a full‐bodied Ethiopian roast,
carefully wrapped for contactless delivery,
as an apology. ‐ None needed.
I'll take the coffee, but keep the apology.
‐ Um, look, all of this, um,
being close bodies and trusting, normal,
it's kinda like I don't remember
how to do any of it anymore.
‐ I get it, if that's what it is.
‐ What do you mean?
‐ I mean, there's no reason
to force something that's not there anymore.
‐ No, it's not‐‐ that's not it.
‐ Are you sure?
[somber music]
[sighs]
It's okay, Helen.
COVID took away a lot of things.
We focus here on the lives lost,
but there were other casualties.
♪ ♪
See you around.
‐ It's all I know right now. I'm sorry.
‐ I know, but Dr. Kapoor
was supposed to be in the OR hours ago.
So that can't be good, right?
‐ I know it's hard to wait.
As soon as I have an update, I will let you know.
‐ Hi, Ella, I'm Dr. Sharpe,
one of Vijay's colleagues.
‐ Of course, Double French Roast with a splash of agave.
‐ Yep. [laughs]
‐ I'm sorry I'm not standing.
I just‐‐I'm worried that if I get out of this chair,
Vijay's gonna die during surgery.
I have OCD,
and my irrational thoughts won this round.
‐ It happens.
‐ Ah, I wish it hadn't
because sitting is making my leg cramps worse.
I stretch, but they just keep coming back.
‐ How long has that been going on?
‐ Um, an hour or two?
I woke up breathing better for the first time in months,
but my back gets hot and now this.
Although my pregnancy podcast
said I was going to start feeling confident and sexy.
‐ Ella, it sounds like you're in labor.
♪ ♪
‐ I got your page.
‐ We caught the guy who's been pinching Oxy
from the dispensary. ‐ An orderly?
‐ My name is Paul. ‐ Paul Argento.
Been working here for 13 months
and stealing from you just as long.
‐ You mind telling me why?
Look, if we're using, we can get you tre‐‐
‐ They're not for me.
‐ Well, if you're selling them...
‐ The‐‐they're for my mom.
She got diagnosed with osteosarcoma a year ago.
She used to be happy,
but now the pain's killing her.
She can't even walk her dog.
The Oxy was helping, but that idiot doctor of hers‐‐
‐ He's been giving me less and less for my pain.
Told me I had to be weaned off.
‐ And what is he giving you as an alternative?
‐ Nothing.
‐ That's awful.
Whoever was treating you stops today.
You're a patient at New Amsterdam now.
‐ But my doctor is at New Amsterdam.
[dramatic music]
‐ Brenna Argento.
‐ I know her well. Stage three bone cancer.
‐ She can barely walk, and yet you pulled her Oxy. Why?
‐ Because received a letter from a Dr. Max Goodwin
saying that if I didn't, I'd be fired.
‐ No, for overprescribing, needlessly, recklessly,
but Brenna‐‐ ‐ Who wasn't the type
of patient you pictured when you wrote it.
This is what happens when you needlessly and recklessly
make a blanket policy without a regard to individual patients.
‐ [laughs] She is suffering.
‐ Of course she's suffering, but not because of me.
Because of you.
♪ ♪
[fast‐paced percussive music]
‐ Don't hang up!
Because I want whoever that is to know
that I'm person who killed you
for reversing this hospital's policy
on limiting opiate prescriptions.
‐ [cooing]
♪ ♪
‐ I am unmoved.
‐ Wow, okay, I gotta go. Yeah, Daddy's in trouble.
Love you. Bye.
‐ Opioid prescriptions at New Amsterdam are down 38%.
We've won awards. We're a national model.
The Nyler family's rightfully drowning
in class‐action lawsuits.
‐ And yet, deaths from narcotic overdoses
are skyrocketing. Know by how much?
240%. So mission accomplished?
‐ You instituted that policy.
‐ Yeah, to save lives, but that policy was a blunt instrument
that put paper over people.
‐ So you're denouncing your own hugely successful policy?
‐ Well, that's just it. It wasn't successful.
Our books were clean, but at the cost of hurting people
who needed our help. We have to do better.
‐ By returning to the halcyon days
when doled out highly addictive drugs like Halloween candy?
‐ Karen, do you know what it feels like to have bone cancer?
‐ Oh, Max. ‐ It's like being stabbed
over and over again
all day long with a serrated knife,
and the only, the only thing,
that is gonna ease that excruciating pain
is opioids.
Those aren't my words.
They're Brenna Argento's,
a patient that we...
that I let down.
‐ You don't convince me opioids work.
That was never the issue. This was always about abuse.
About ensuring the drugs we send into the world
aren't getting our patients hooked or being sold
or ending up in the wrong hands.
‐ You're absolutely right.
‐ I don't like it when we're fighting,
and you agree with me. ‐ No, you're right.
We can get opioids to the people who need them
and in quantities that are in safe‐‐
Karen, yes!
‐ [sighs]
‐ Sorry, forgot this was my office.
Uh, would you excuse me?
♪ ♪
‐ Contractions are organized and four minutes apart.
It's official.
‐ What's official?
‐ Ella, you're gonna have a baby today.
‐ Oh, no, that's impossible
'cause my due date's in three weeks.
On a Friday. And today's Tuesday.
And Dr. Richardson was gonna delivery my baby.
‐ Well, looks like someone
wants to crash this party early.
I'll be covering for Dr. Richardson all day,
so I think we'll be seeing a lot of each other.
I'll be back in a bit to check on your progress.
‐ Thank you.
‐ This is not OCD. This is a relaxation exercise.
‐ Good, you know, good. Relaxing is good.
‐ How is this happening?
I am not ready for this.
‐ Is there someone that you would like me to call?
Family, friends? ‐ No, there's only Vijay,
and he promised he'd be here for this.
Um, okay, uh...
Who‐‐uh. You could try my doula,
but I think she's in Portland this weekend
for her great‐aunt's birthday, so that feels like a dead end.
‐ I know a great doula here at New Amsterdam.
‐ Has she been working with me for the last 26 weeks
on ways to manage my OCD for this specific moment?
‐ Uh, no.
‐ I had a plan. I had such a perfect plan.
Oh.
‐ Surgical suite prep to OR seven.
‐ [sighs]
[line trilling]
Uh, Leela, hi.
Can you clear my afternoon please?
No pagers, no patients. Nothing.
‐ What are you doing?
‐ I'm kicking off a new plan.
♪ ♪
‐ Okay.
Well, your concern is duly noted,
but I don't need your help. But thank you.
‐ You know your staff's noticed?
I mean, even I can tell you're weak on your feet,
and you just admitted to caloric restrictions
spanning over 72 hours.
‐ It's a cleanse, Lauren.
Really, I'm fine.
‐ You know you sound like every first‐timer
who's just been dragged to rehab.
‐ Whatever it is that you think this is,
it isn't, and I don't appreciate the accusation.
‐ Do you hide food?
‐ Lauren‐‐
‐ Sometimes people starve themselves after a binge,
and not for health reasons, but because they feel ashamed.
‐ Well, it's not like that.
‐ Must be hard to hide your stash at home
what with Martin and the kids, so where do you keep it?
‐ Nowhere, I don't have a‐‐ ‐ Here in this office?
‐ No.
Lauren, don't. Don't.
‐ Oh, Iggy.
‐ [sighs]
‐ Hey. ‐ It's...
‐ The left atrium's barely moving.
‐ COVID really did a number on his heart.
‐ Vijay said he got it here at New Amsterdam?
‐ He's not the only one. ‐ Approaching the left atrium.
You too?
‐ It was in the early days.
I wore the same mask day and night for two weeks straight.
Then I was intubating a patient,
got a focused blast of exhaled air
right in my face. [laughs]
I just felt the virus coming through the mask.
Sure enough, three days later, cough, fever, headaches.
‐ Yeah. Vijay.
Why was he even here, you know?
I mean, his age, knowing the risk, why even come in?
‐ How could he not? ‐ Vitals are stable.
‐ We all felt a sense of duty,
of pride even.
‐ [sighs]
[no sound]
‐ What's that? You can't...
Ah, sorry about that.
Hi, again.
There are quite a few of you on this call,
and, well, you all have
something in common,
and that's that
you are all victims
of New Amsterdam's
opioid policy that kept pain meds
from the people who need them the most.
We failed you
in the most fundamental way
a hospital can.
You came to us in pain,
you asked for our help, and we said no.
And what's worse,
is we shamed you for asking.
So I'm here to apologize
and to tell you that that cruel policy
ends now.
[cheers and applause]
‐ Yes!
‐ Finally.
‐ It's about damn time.
‐ Yeah, all patients will get
the prescribed opioids they need
based on their pain levels,
and all have you to do is swing by New Amsterdam
once a week to pick up your pills.
Easy as pie.
‐ Wait, what? ‐ [speaking Spanish]
‐ I can't do that. ‐ No, no.
We're gonna make it very, very simple.
We're gonna establish a special clinic.
‐ What the hell's a special clinic?
‐ I live in Long Island.
It's a three‐hour trip if I'm lucky.
‐ Excuse me, I have four kids and a job,
and you expect me to spend my one day off
with you every week?
‐ Okay, I'm hearing some concerns
about the policy that we were
all just very excited about.
But I'll just be honest.
The hospital has some concerns
about portion control.
‐ Portion control? Like I'm five?
‐ No, no, no. [laughs]
It's just that these pills are highly addictive,
and we do need to make sure
that nobody is using
or distributing these pills inappropriately.
‐ [laughs] So now you think I'm dealing?
‐ No. ‐ You just said
the shaming of chronic pain treatment was over.
‐ And it is, but...
‐ Are you serious, Max? ‐ Come on.
‐ That's not gonna work. ‐ No way.
‐ Um...
‐ What a joke. ‐ I'm outta here.
‐ Come on, Max. ‐ This is ridiculous.
‐ Thanks for nothing. ‐ I'm closing this window.
[fast‐paced percussive music]
♪ ♪
‐ Thank you all for responding to my multiple app requests.
I have some deliveries for you.
Addresses are grouped together for maximum efficiency.
‐ Those burritos? ‐ They are not.
‐ Are your items heat sensitive?
‐ No, we're good. So if you wanna grab your bag‐‐
‐ Are dealing with breakable items like figurines?
‐ Are they insured? ‐ Are we liable here?
‐ I‐‐no, it's very simple.
Some of our patients are having a hard time
getting to the hospital to pick up their prescriptions,
so I am hiring all of you
to solve that problem.
‐ So we're delivering drugs.
‐ [laughs]
Technically, yes?
But uh...
did I mention there's a 25% tip?
‐ All right.
♪ ♪
‐ Yo, how many are we allowed to take?
‐ Okay, okay.
That was smooth.
‐ That was the alcohol swipe.
‐ Getting started now.
‐ Oh, my God. Distract me.
‐ Uh, distract you?
‐ Say something. Anything.
‐ Um, okay.
Did you know that women blink nearly twice as much as men?
‐ Nope, something interesting.
‐ Fine, fine. Okay.
‐ [gasps] Aah, it feels like a sword!
Like I'm literally being stabbed by a sword!
‐ All right, okay. Um...
there's this gorgeous man,
this doctor that I was seeing.
‐ Yes, good. ‐ Am seeing.
Well, mmm, was seeing. [stammers] I don't know.
[laughs] I don't know.
But we started dating just when the pandemic hit,
and I thought about him for months during the lockdown.
I fantasized about him.
But then, the other day,
when he reached out to touch me, I pulled away.
I recoiled like I was physically repelled by him...
And I don't know. I don't know.
Is it me?
Am I that scared to be touched by someone,
or is it him?
Did what we have,
did it just sort of...
‐ No, keep going.
But fast forward to the interesting part.
Did he dump you? Are you sad?
[gasps] Aah!
‐ Was that a contraction?
‐ Mm‐hmm. Mmm!
‐ What? The epidural seems to be
taking its sweet time. ‐ Yeah, it should've
kicked in by now. Unfortunately,
I think the catheter's tip is in the sub‐dural space.
‐ It didn't work?
[sighs]
Uh, can we try again the epidural?
[dramatic music]
‐ It's too late, sweetheart. You're too far along.
Ella, you're gonna have to do this
on your own.
‐ No. No.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
‐ All right, I know how this looks.
I do. Believe me.
But these are my dad's words.
They're his words,
and growing up,
I had to hear them practically every day.
My father struggled with his weight his entire life,
and he didn't want me to suffer the same fate.
So at an early age,
he took an interest in my weight.
‐ An interest?
‐ Mm‐hmm, yeah.
It started around the third grade.
I filled out a little bit, and, uh,
he would make me go on crash diets
out of the blue,
skip meals, take meal replacement bars to school.
‐ As a nine‐year‐old?
‐ Mm‐hmm.
Yeah, and...
he would make me take my shirt off
so he could take pictures of my body
to, um, put up on the wall in the basement
next to the makeshift gym that he'd built for me
to track my process.
There was a body progress chart.
And if I would ever walk by him,
he would smack my gut and say,
"Jesus, look at that thing."
[somber music]
"Got a lot of work left to do, don't we, buddy?"
And what's worse is,
if I ever had a good weigh‐in, which was not very often,
I, uh, I would be over the moon
because it would make me feel loved.
♪ ♪
[sighs]
Then...this one time,
I guess I would've been in middle school by this point,
I just‐‐I‐‐
I hated everything about myself.
So I tried to hang myself.
‐ What?
Jesus, Iggy.
‐ No, it's okay. [cries]
It didn't work, obviously.
Ironically, I was too fat
for the rod in the basement closet
to hold me up, and it crashed down on my head,
and my mom heard the sound and came to help me.
‐ What? What did your dad say?
‐ Oh.
My dad, um, well,
that night at my weigh‐in,
he just snapped another polaroid for the wall
and acted like nothing ever happened.
‐ [scoffs]
‐ That's my dad for you.
‐ [sighs]
These are his words,
but they don't control me anymore.
They do not.
They serve as a reminder of all of the things
that I have conquered, which is a lot,
and sometimes I look at these words,
and they remind that I'm not that kid anymore
and that I'm making better decisions.
I'm making healthy decisions in my life.
And that I no longer need to stand around with my shirt off
and let others judge me. ‐ What?
You know that's not what I was doing, right?
‐ I'm fine.
I am more than fine.
You can rest easy.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have patients to see.
[door clicks open]
‐ No, I'm‐‐I'm being careful.
Yeah.
Ma, I'm gonna see you soon.
Okay, yeah. I love you too.
All right.
‐ Heard you pulled off one hell of a TAVR.
Just this side of genius.
‐ I accept your apology, Max.
‐ You need anything else while you're here?
‐ Aw, no, just catching up with some folks.
You know, I missed my favorite scrub nurse in OR today, JJ.
‐ Devlin. ‐ Yeah.
‐ He passed away a few months ago.
COVID.
‐ [sighs] That's too bad.
‐ Everything's changed.
‐ Dr. Max Goodwin. ‐ That's me.
‐ You're under arrest. ‐ Whoa, what's going on?
‐ For what?
‐ For writing 700 Oxycodone prescriptions,
each one over 100 milligrams,
and distributing them with bike messengers.
‐ Oh, that.
‐ It's nice to see some things haven't changed.
[beeper beeping]
[fast‐paced dramatic music]
‐ BP's 80/40 and falling.
‐ Push epi, I'm coming in.
I need an echo over here.
‐ What happened?
‐ The clip didn't hold. His heart is failing.
♪ ♪
‐ [sighs]
[fast‐paced percussive music]
‐ The DA only agreed
to not press charges for narcotics trafficking
because you're an essential worker.
‐ Huh. ‐ Congratulations.
You're one of the select few to benefit from COVID‐19.
‐ Thanks for getting me out.
‐ I have half a mind to leave you in there.
‐ You know, pharmacies mail opioids all the time.
Bike messengers are almost the same.
‐ I wonder if you've ever considered how exhausting it is
to be your boss.
All your wonderful ideas
that come with such chaos,
every single one.
[sighs] It's funny.
The thing you're best at is the part of my job I hate the most.
You ignore reality. ‐ That's not fair.
‐ Says the man who just sent 70,000 milligrams of Oxy
out into the street via bike messenger.
I know it seems like a good idea.
Hell, it might even be a good idea,
but it's my job to deal with the reality of your ideas,
in this case criminal reality. Optics matter.
‐ Patients matter.
‐ I'm glad you're helping people, Max, truly.
But your plan has no accountability.
You don't know where these drugs are going.
You just don't.
And opioids, the potential for abuse,
it's a very emotional issue.
To many people, opioids aren't pain medicine.
They're what killed someone they loved.
[somber music]
♪ ♪
‐ [sighs]
‐ Wait. Iggy.
Iggy, I wasn't judging you.
‐ You could've fooled me.
‐ It was just‐‐people die from what you're doing.
‐ What did she say? [chatter]
[murmuring continues]
[dramatic music]
‐ In here. In here.
‐ Ig. ‐ [sighs]
‐ Ig, look, I'm sorry for making a scene.
‐ You should be.
‐ It's just
I've seen people in my ED with eating disorders.
I mean, I've known people with eating disorders.
‐ [sighs] ‐ Some of them...
they're not here anymore.
‐ Mm‐hmm.
‐ Look.
I know as well anyone
that the truth is really difficult.
‐ I'm sorry. What are you doing?
Are you comparing your issues to mine right now?
Let me just mirror that back for you
so you can hear it out loud.
I'm on the Jimmy Kimmel diet,
and you almost killed a patient because you are a drug addict.
Not the same. ‐ That was way out of line.
‐ I'm outta line? It's not hard, Lauren.
This is a hospital.
There's only one line that matters.
You were hurting patients. I am not.
Plain and simple!
‐ Patients aren't the only people you can hurt.
‐ Oh, yeah? Well, I think the janitors
are safe from my eating too. ‐ Yeah?
What about your kids?
‐ Excuse me? ‐ You're starving yourself.
You think they don't notice that?
‐ You stop talking. ‐ How many meals have you
had with them where you
haven't eaten anything? ‐ Stop!
‐ How many have you skipped altogether?
I mean, what kind of screwed up issues
are your kids gonna have with food because of you?
[knocking] Occupied!
‐ It's a bad time, Gladys.
‐ It's Dr. Kapoor.
‐ The clip failed,
tore right through the valve leaflets.
I'm gonna have to crack open his chest
and put in an artificial valve.
‐ That's a big surgery.
‐ I thought you said you couldn't sew into the muscle.
What changed? ‐ Nothing. Not a damn thing.
‐ But he'll make it through the surgery, right?
[somber music]
♪ ♪
‐ That's why I thought you should see him now,
and have one more moment with him
in case...
I'm gonna go prep.
♪ ♪
‐ [grunts]
[sighs]
‐ You're fully effaced and dilated,
but the baby's still at minus three position.
Ella, the delivery isn't progressing as I had hoped.
‐ What does that mean?
‐ When your contraction comes, you need to push real hard.
‐ Oh, my God, this is a disaster.
‐ Maybe you could hold her hand.
‐ [heavy breathing] ‐ E‐Ella.
Look. Look.
Count them out with me, okay?
‐ [groans] ‐ Here we go.
Give me the biggest push you got.
‐ You can do this. Come on, come on.
‐ No, I can't! Stop, I don't want to!
What if the baby's not okay? What if I hurt it?
What I ate undercooked meat and didn't know it?
And seven weeks ago I took a bath
right after the tub was cleaned,
and the water probably had bleach in it.
What kind of mom is that careless?
‐ You are not careless.
You have disorder that sends your pregnancy into overdrive,
but you fought it, and you've made it this far.
‐ I cheated. I got scans all the time.
Sometimes two days in a row
in case something happened while I was sleeping.
But then everything shut down,
and Vijay got sick, and I don't know why,
but I just convinced myself
that the baby was going to be okay as long as he was okay.
What if Vijay's not okay?
‐ Ella! Everything on that monitor
says that your baby is going to be okay,
but you have to deliver it...
‐ No! Oh.
‐ Contractions peaking. ‐ Aah!
‐ You can do it.
Your baby needs you to push now.
‐ [grunts] Aah.
[crying]
‐ Eh?
‐ Yeah, yeah, buddy? What is it?
Hit me.
‐ You're such a good dad.
‐ Aw, I don't know. I...
‐ If this doesn't work out...
Will you look after
Ella and the baby?
‐ [crying]
‐ You've got this.
You can do it.
‐ Hey.
And I am dying...
‐ What are you talking about? Don't be silly.
You are going to be annoying her
for the rest of your life, okay?
‐ Please.
‐ If something happens, I...
[cries] Yes.
Obviously.
‐ Good.
‐ [sighs]
[somber music]
‐ Listen, Iggy.
‐ Lauren, I'm fine. ‐ No.
I never should've dragged your kids into this.
I'm really sorry.
‐ A couple nights ago, I was, uh,
I was wearing this nice new sweater
that Martin gave me, and, um...
Harper told me that I looked handsome in it.
Then I immediately grabbed my stomach,
and I told her that she was wrong.
It just popped out of mouth.
[crying]
I say things like that all the time.
And Vijay thinks that I'm a great father?
[crying]
I'm teaching my kids
that someone who looks like me doesn't deserve to be loved.
That is the same lesson that my dad taught me.
Aw, man.
He just used different words.
‐ Iggy.
These aren't your dad's words.
You wrote this.
‐ I know.
‐ These are your words. You're calling yourself this,
and you're keep suffering until you stop.
‐ [sighs] If I can't stop,
this note, that voice...
It's the thing about myself that feels the most true.
How do you stop believing that?
‐ Well, you could try talking to a therapist.
‐ [crying]
‐ Hey, I did.
He saved my life.
‐ [sighs]
‐ Come here.
‐ Thank you. ‐ Yeah.
‐ ♪ Even if we try ♪
♪ Even if we try ♪
♪ To make ourselves ♪
♪ All right ♪
♪ To mend our severed lives ♪
[no audio]
♪ While all the rivers rage ♪
♪ Descend upon the sage ♪
♪ Alone on willowed eves ♪
♪ I lift my voice to sing ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Down long, hollow grove ♪
♪ Its wilting, winding bones ♪
♪ Come on, Johnny, please ♪
♪ Won't you speak to me? ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
‐ Ready to restart the heart.
‐ Everything's solid.
‐ Charging. Clear.
‐ Suctioning.
‐ Quarter's ready.
[tense music]
[machine beeping]
‐ We did it.
‐ Good job, everyone.
[warm music]
‐ [sighs]
Ooh.
‐ All right, let's close him up.
♪ ♪
[machine beeping rapidly] BP is dropping.
‐ What?
‐ Heart valve's not holding. ‐ It's slipping.
Give me a 3‐0 proline on the needle driver.
‐ Times two.
‐ You work the septum, I'll work the free wall.
I'm gonna have to get him back on bypass.
‐ We can't reestablish aortic cannulation.
‐ [grunts] ‐ As a backup, yes.
‐ My stitches aren't holding. ‐ Neither are mine.
‐ Trying 5‐0. ‐ Suction needs to be higher.
‐ I'm not getting any purchase.
‐ Another bag.
‐ Come on. Hold, damn it.
‐ Flash sterilized.
[somber music]
♪ ♪
‐ Ansuya.
[ethereal music]
Ansuya.
‐ ♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh, oh ♪
‐ Ansuya.
‐ Vijay.
‐ ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
‐ Eat this.
‐ I don't need it.
All I need is you.
‐ It will give you strength
for our granddaughter.
‐ Granddaughter? [laughs]
‐ She needs her Dadaji.
‐ ♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh ♪
‐ Vijay?
‐ ♪ Ah ♪
[machine beeping]
‐ He's waking up.
Oh, thank God. Vijay.
[warm music]
‐ Welcome back, Dr. Kapoor.
♪ ♪
‐ [chuckles]
[sighs]
[baby crying]
‐ [laughs] Happy birthday, little one.
[both laughing]
[baby cooing]
‐ Uh, K‐Karen!
‐ Are the cops chasing you now? ‐ Uh, I don't know,
but I did come up with a solve for our opioid issue,
and I think you're really gonna like it.
‐ And here I thought we knew each other better.
‐ Watermarking.
So every single opioid that New Amsterdam sends out
into the world will be watermarked
with invisible, fluorescent fibers.
Every patient will have access
to the medicine they need and without shame.
And they'll be able to manage their pain,
and they'll be able to live functional lives.
But if those pills ever do end up in the street,
or in the wrong hands, we'll know.
There will be no drug trafficking,
and there will be accountability.
Oh, and I almost forgot the best part.
The Nylers are gonna pay for it.
‐ Why would they do that?
‐ They kinda have to.
Part of their settlement includes
donating millions of dollars to public hospitals,
just like ours.
‐ [laughs]
I don't know what to say.
It sounds like a well‐thought‐out
and realistic plan.
‐ I know. Weird, right?
‐ [chuckles]
‐ Karen.
Thank you for keeping me accountable.
‐ That's my job.
And every once and a while, it's worth it.
[keys clacking]
‐ I'm not ready.
‐ Okay.
‐ I mean, I'm not ready to call it.
[hopeful music]
♪ ♪
[somber music]
♪ ♪
‐ I should've been here.
‐ Well, you're here now.
[thunder rumbling]
[projector clicking]