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‐ Previously on
"New Amsterdam"...

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‐ Somebody reported that you

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have a problem with Adderall.

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‐ You're asking me if I've
ever risked a patient's life

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because I'm stoned.

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‐ Yeah, and you haven't
answered the question.

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‐ What do you think
would happen

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if you stopped helping people?
Who would they see?

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‐ They would see
a corny, nerdy,

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fat, worthless nothing.

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‐ All right, since you all
prescribe 79% of our opioids,

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I am giving you one year

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to prescribe 79% less,

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and anyone who doesn't
will be fired.

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[dramatic music]

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‐ I think they're clean.

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‐ The damage to his heart
was extensive.

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The virus also ravaged
the surrounding heart muscle.

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‐ How bad?

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‐ Even if you found the best
heart surgeon in the world,

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I'm not sure it'd be enough.

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[Andrew Bird's
"Three White Horses"]

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‐ ♪ There'll be
three white horses ♪

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♪ All in a line ♪

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♪ There'll be
three white horses ♪

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♪ In a line ♪

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♪ ♪

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♪ Three white horses ♪

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♪ When you go that way ♪

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♪ You will need somebody ♪

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♪ When you come to die ♪

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♪ ♪

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♪ Don't dismiss it ♪

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♪ Like it's easy ♪

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♪ Tell me what's so easy ♪

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♪ About coming
to say goodbye? ♪

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♪ You're gonna miss her ♪

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♪ In the evening ♪

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‐ Hey.
‐ Yeah?

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‐ Dr. Reynolds.

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I used to work here.

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‐ Hospital ID?

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‐ No, but I should be
in the system.

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‐ ♪ There'll be
three white horses ♪

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‐ Oh, thank you.

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‐ ♪ When you go that way ♪

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♪ You will need somebody ♪

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♪ When you come to die ♪

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♪ It's not desperation ♪

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♪ That we're breeding ♪

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♪ It's just
a need we're feeding ♪

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♪ Before you say goodbye ♪

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♪ You're gonna miss me ♪

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♪ In the evening ♪

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‐ [sighs]

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‐ ♪ Somebody when you
come to die ♪

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♪ You know all you need is ♪

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♪ Somebody when you ♪

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♪ Come to die ♪

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‐ So?

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‐ I can't operate.

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[dramatic music]

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♪ ♪

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Here's Vijay's cardiac echo.

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‐ What do you mean
"can't operate"?

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‐ His mitral valve, it's
greater than 60% regurgitation.

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That's secondary to a ruptured
papillary muscle.

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‐ I didn't fly you out here
to not operate.

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‐ Listen, his EF is under 20%.

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These numbers aren't even
compatible with life.

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‐ Right, which is exactly why
you need to fix the valve.

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‐ I can't fix it
because the virus has damaged

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the heart muscle
around the valve.

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There's nothing to sew
a new valve into.

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‐ Doing nothing
isn't an option.

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‐ I didn't say
I was doing nothing.

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Look, I'm gonna use a catheter.
‐ TAVR?

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‐ All right,
I'm gonna place a clip...

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‐ A clip?

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‐ Into the mitral's weakened
area‐‐that should fix it.

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‐ He's dying, Floyd.
He needs surgery.

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‐ Okay, look, you brought me
here because of my expertise,

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and because you trust me.
[beeper beeping]

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Right now my expertise
is saying this.

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‐ I gotta go.

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‐ What happened to
"How can I help?"

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‐ The virus hit us hard.
Nothing's the same.

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‐ My hospital had three.

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‐ Three what?

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‐ Only three deaths.

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I feel guilty just saying it.

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‐ Don't.
You were spared.

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I wish we were.

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Especially Lauren.

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It hit her the worst.

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[somber music]

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♪ ♪

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[knocking on door]

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[knocking continues]

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‐ Candelario's on!
‐ Dr. Bloom, it's Gladys.

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‐ Get Candelario!
‐ It's about Iggy.

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[dramatic music]

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‐ I'm on my way out.

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♪ ♪

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‐ He's sweaty,
wobbly on his feet.

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‐ Did he take a COVID test?

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‐ PCR came back negative,

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but he can hardly stand.

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♪ ♪

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[knocks]

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‐ Ig?

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‐ Hey.
‐ Hey.

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‐ What brings you down to the‐‐
Ooh.

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‐ Aw, God, Gladys was right.
You gotta go home.

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‐ No, I just‐‐
I stood up too fast.

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I got a head rush.
‐ You're valor is noted,

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but if you've got the flu,
you gotta go.

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‐ I don't have the flu,
I'm just‐‐I'm tired.

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‐ You're color's not great.

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‐ Lauren, if I feel
anything flu‐y, I'll, uh...

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[sighs]
‐ Hey.

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‐ I'll page you.
‐ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

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Hey, come on, come on.
Sit down.

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Sit down.
‐ No, no, I'm fine.

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I just‐‐I haven't eaten.

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‐ Since when?

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‐ [clears throat]

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‐ Hey.
How many meals?

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‐ [sighs]

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‐ How many days?

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‐ Two.

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Maybe three.

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‐ Hi.

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I thought you might enjoy
a full‐bodied Ethiopian roast,

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carefully wrapped
for contactless delivery,

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as an apology.
‐ None needed.

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I'll take the coffee,
but keep the apology.

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‐ Um, look, all of this, um,

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being close bodies
and trusting, normal,

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it's kinda like
I don't remember

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how to do any of it anymore.

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‐ I get it,
if that's what it is.

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‐ What do you mean?

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‐ I mean, there's no reason

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to force something
that's not there anymore.

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‐ No, it's not‐‐
that's not it.

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‐ Are you sure?

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[somber music]

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[sighs]

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It's okay, Helen.

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COVID took away
a lot of things.

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We focus here
on the lives lost,

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but there were
other casualties.

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♪ ♪

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See you around.

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‐ It's all I know right now.
I'm sorry.

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‐ I know, but Dr. Kapoor

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was supposed to be
in the OR hours ago.

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So that can't be good, right?

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‐ I know it's hard to wait.

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As soon as I have an update,
I will let you know.

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‐ Hi, Ella, I'm Dr. Sharpe,

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one of Vijay's colleagues.

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‐ Of course, Double French
Roast with a splash of agave.

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‐ Yep.
[laughs]

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‐ I'm sorry I'm not standing.

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I just‐‐I'm worried that
if I get out of this chair,

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Vijay's gonna die
during surgery.

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I have OCD,

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and my irrational thoughts
won this round.

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‐ It happens.

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‐ Ah, I wish it hadn't

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because sitting is making
my leg cramps worse.

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I stretch, but they just
keep coming back.

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‐ How long has that
been going on?

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‐ Um, an hour or two?

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I woke up breathing better
for the first time in months,

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but my back gets hot
and now this.

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Although my pregnancy podcast

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said I was going to start
feeling confident and sexy.

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‐ Ella, it sounds like
you're in labor.

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♪ ♪

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‐ I got your page.

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‐ We caught the guy
who's been pinching Oxy

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from the dispensary.
‐ An orderly?

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‐ My name is Paul.
‐ Paul Argento.

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Been working here for 13 months

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and stealing from you
just as long.

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‐ You mind telling me why?

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Look, if we're using,
we can get you tre‐‐

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‐ They're not for me.

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‐ Well, if you're
selling them...

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‐ The‐‐they're for my mom.

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She got diagnosed
with osteosarcoma a year ago.

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She used to be happy,

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but now the pain's killing her.

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She can't even walk her dog.

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The Oxy was helping,
but that idiot doctor of hers‐‐

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‐ He's been giving me
less and less for my pain.

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Told me I had to be weaned off.

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‐ And what is he giving you
as an alternative?

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‐ Nothing.

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‐ That's awful.

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Whoever was treating you
stops today.

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You're a patient
at New Amsterdam now.

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‐ But my doctor
is at New Amsterdam.

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[dramatic music]

208
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‐ Brenna Argento.

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‐ I know her well.
Stage three bone cancer.

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‐ She can barely walk, and
yet you pulled her Oxy. Why?

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‐ Because received a letter
from a Dr. Max Goodwin

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saying that if I didn't,
I'd be fired.

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‐ No, for overprescribing,
needlessly, recklessly,

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00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,862
but Brenna‐‐
‐ Who wasn't the type

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00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:50,697
of patient you pictured
when you wrote it.

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This is what happens when
you needlessly and recklessly

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make a blanket policy without a
regard to individual patients.

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‐ [laughs]
She is suffering.

219
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‐ Of course she's suffering,
but not because of me.

220
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Because of you.

221
00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:04,961
♪ ♪

222
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:12,886
[fast‐paced percussive music]

223
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‐ Don't hang up!

224
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,890
Because I want
whoever that is to know

225
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,224
that I'm person who killed you

226
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,726
for reversing
this hospital's policy

227
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,436
on limiting
opiate prescriptions.

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‐ [cooing]

229
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♪ ♪

230
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‐ I am unmoved.

231
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:30,487
‐ Wow, okay, I gotta go.
Yeah, Daddy's in trouble.

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Love you.
Bye.

233
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:35,867
‐ Opioid prescriptions
at New Amsterdam are down 38%.

234
00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:38,536
We've won awards.
We're a national model.

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The Nyler family's
rightfully drowning

236
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:41,956
in class‐action lawsuits.

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‐ And yet,
deaths from narcotic overdoses

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00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,252
are skyrocketing.
Know by how much?

239
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240%.
So mission accomplished?

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‐ You instituted that policy.

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00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:54,677
‐ Yeah, to save lives, but that
policy was a blunt instrument

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00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,221
that put paper over people.

243
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:58,598
‐ So you're denouncing your own
hugely successful policy?

244
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,225
‐ Well, that's just it.
It wasn't successful.

245
00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:03,269
Our books were clean, but
at the cost of hurting people

246
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,105
who needed our help.
We have to do better.

247
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:06,397
‐ By returning
to the halcyon days

248
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:09,359
when doled out highly addictive
drugs like Halloween candy?

249
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,945
‐ Karen, do you know what it
feels like to have bone cancer?

250
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:13,446
‐ Oh, Max.
‐ It's like being stabbed

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00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,031
over and over again

252
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:17,117
all day long
with a serrated knife,

253
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,952
and the only, the only thing,

254
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,621
that is gonna ease
that excruciating pain

255
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,081
is opioids.

256
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,999
Those aren't my words.

257
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,459
They're Brenna Argento's,

258
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,962
a patient that we...

259
00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:31,256
that I let down.

260
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:34,050
‐ You don't convince me
opioids work.

261
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:37,137
That was never the issue.
This was always about abuse.

262
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:39,472
About ensuring the drugs
we send into the world

263
00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:41,724
aren't getting our patients
hooked or being sold

264
00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:43,059
or ending up
in the wrong hands.

265
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,477
‐ You're absolutely right.

266
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,312
‐ I don't like it
when we're fighting,

267
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,355
and you agree with me.
‐ No, you're right.

268
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,732
We can get opioids
to the people who need them

269
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,484
and in quantities
that are in safe‐‐

270
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,153
Karen, yes!

271
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:55,989
‐ [sighs]

272
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:57,115
‐ Sorry, forgot this
was my office.

273
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,658
Uh, would you excuse me?

274
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,286
♪ ♪

275
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:04,956
‐ Contractions are organized
and four minutes apart.

276
00:11:04,956 --> 00:11:07,041
It's official.

277
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,418
‐ What's official?

278
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:11,171
‐ Ella, you're gonna have
a baby today.

279
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,839
‐ Oh, no, that's impossible

280
00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:15,008
'cause my due date's
in three weeks.

281
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:17,468
On a Friday.
And today's Tuesday.

282
00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:20,638
And Dr. Richardson was gonna
delivery my baby.

283
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,764
‐ Well, looks like someone

284
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:23,349
wants to crash
this party early.

285
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:25,685
I'll be covering for
Dr. Richardson all day,

286
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,770
so I think we'll be seeing
a lot of each other.

287
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:30,523
I'll be back in a bit
to check on your progress.

288
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,483
‐ Thank you.

289
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:37,447
‐ This is not OCD.
This is a relaxation exercise.

290
00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:39,490
‐ Good, you know, good.
Relaxing is good.

291
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:41,117
‐ How is this happening?

292
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:43,536
I am not ready for this.

293
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,371
‐ Is there someone that you
would like me to call?

294
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:48,166
Family, friends?
‐ No, there's only Vijay,

295
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:49,834
and he promised
he'd be here for this.

296
00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:52,212
Um, okay, uh...

297
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:54,714
Who‐‐uh.
You could try my doula,

298
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,799
but I think she's in Portland
this weekend

299
00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:59,385
for her great‐aunt's birthday,
so that feels like a dead end.

300
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,554
‐ I know a great doula here
at New Amsterdam.

301
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,389
‐ Has she been working with me
for the last 26 weeks

302
00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,975
on ways to manage my OCD
for this specific moment?

303
00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:09,020
‐ Uh, no.

304
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:11,731
‐ I had a plan.
I had such a perfect plan.

305
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,983
Oh.

306
00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:16,402
‐ Surgical suite prep
to OR seven.

307
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:18,196
‐ [sighs]

308
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:20,823
[line trilling]

309
00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:22,075
Uh, Leela, hi.

310
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,368
Can you clear
my afternoon please?

311
00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:25,078
No pagers, no patients.
Nothing.

312
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,288
‐ What are you doing?

313
00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:29,624
‐ I'm kicking off a new plan.

314
00:12:29,624 --> 00:12:33,253
♪ ♪

315
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,420
‐ Okay.

316
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:37,048
Well, your concern
is duly noted,

317
00:12:37,048 --> 00:12:40,176
but I don't need your help.
But thank you.

318
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:41,678
‐ You know
your staff's noticed?

319
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:43,554
I mean, even I can tell
you're weak on your feet,

320
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,182
and you just admitted
to caloric restrictions

321
00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:47,850
spanning over 72 hours.

322
00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:49,769
‐ It's a cleanse, Lauren.

323
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,063
Really, I'm fine.

324
00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:53,856
‐ You know you sound like
every first‐timer

325
00:12:53,856 --> 00:12:55,400
who's just been
dragged to rehab.

326
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,568
‐ Whatever it is
that you think this is,

327
00:12:57,568 --> 00:12:59,904
it isn't, and I don't
appreciate the accusation.

328
00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:02,865
‐ Do you hide food?

329
00:13:02,865 --> 00:13:03,950
‐ Lauren‐‐

330
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,286
‐ Sometimes people starve
themselves after a binge,

331
00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:08,204
and not for health reasons,
but because they feel ashamed.

332
00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:09,622
‐ Well, it's not like that.

333
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,791
‐ Must be hard to hide
your stash at home

334
00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,793
what with Martin and the kids,
so where do you keep it?

335
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,878
‐ Nowhere, I don't have a‐‐
‐ Here in this office?

336
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:18,214
‐ No.

337
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:19,924
Lauren, don't.
Don't.

338
00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:26,431
‐ Oh, Iggy.

339
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,517
‐ [sighs]

340
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,645
‐ Hey.
‐ It's...

341
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,651
‐ The left atrium's
barely moving.

342
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,820
‐ COVID really did
a number on his heart.

343
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:43,740
‐ Vijay said he got it
here at New Amsterdam?

344
00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:46,492
‐ He's not the only one.
‐ Approaching the left atrium.

345
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:48,119
You too?

346
00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:49,787
‐ It was in the early days.

347
00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:53,207
I wore the same mask day and
night for two weeks straight.

348
00:13:53,207 --> 00:13:55,334
Then I was intubating
a patient,

349
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:57,003
got a focused blast
of exhaled air

350
00:13:57,003 --> 00:13:58,296
right in my face.
[laughs]

351
00:13:58,296 --> 00:14:00,423
I just felt the virus
coming through the mask.

352
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:03,176
Sure enough, three days later,
cough, fever, headaches.

353
00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:05,970
‐ Yeah.
Vijay.

354
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,930
Why was he even here, you know?

355
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:11,350
I mean, his age, knowing
the risk, why even come in?

356
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:13,352
‐ How could he not?
‐ Vitals are stable.

357
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:16,189
‐ We all felt a sense of duty,

358
00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:18,649
of pride even.

359
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,030
‐ [sighs]

360
00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:26,824
[no sound]

361
00:14:26,824 --> 00:14:28,284
‐ What's that?
You can't...

362
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:30,536
Ah, sorry about that.

363
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:32,413
Hi, again.

364
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:35,958
There are quite a few of you
on this call,

365
00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:36,959
and, well, you all have

366
00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:37,960
something in common,

367
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,003
and that's that

368
00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:40,004
you are all victims

369
00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:41,214
of New Amsterdam's

370
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:42,882
opioid policy
that kept pain meds

371
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,218
from the people
who need them the most.

372
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:46,886
We failed you

373
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:49,180
in the most fundamental way

374
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,723
a hospital can.

375
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:53,142
You came to us in pain,

376
00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:56,229
you asked for our help,
and we said no.

377
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,397
And what's worse,

378
00:14:58,397 --> 00:15:01,234
is we shamed you for asking.

379
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:03,694
So I'm here to apologize

380
00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:07,198
and to tell you
that that cruel policy

381
00:15:07,198 --> 00:15:08,991
ends now.

382
00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:09,909
[cheers and applause]

383
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:10,910
‐ Yes!

384
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,036
‐ Finally.

385
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:13,037
‐ It's about damn time.

386
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,705
‐ Yeah, all patients will get

387
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,457
the prescribed opioids
they need

388
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:17,959
based on their pain levels,

389
00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:19,585
and all have you to do
is swing by New Amsterdam

390
00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:22,088
once a week
to pick up your pills.

391
00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:23,673
Easy as pie.

392
00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,424
‐ Wait, what?
‐ [speaking Spanish]

393
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:26,843
‐ I can't do that.
‐ No, no.

394
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:29,220
We're gonna make it
very, very simple.

395
00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:31,222
We're gonna establish
a special clinic.

396
00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:32,765
‐ What the hell's
a special clinic?

397
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:33,808
‐ I live in Long Island.

398
00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:35,893
It's a three‐hour trip
if I'm lucky.

399
00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:37,895
‐ Excuse me,
I have four kids and a job,

400
00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:39,438
and you expect me
to spend my one day off

401
00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:40,731
with you every week?

402
00:15:40,731 --> 00:15:43,025
‐ Okay, I'm hearing
some concerns

403
00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:44,861
about the policy that we were

404
00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:46,946
all just very excited about.

405
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,614
But I'll just be honest.

406
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,867
The hospital has some concerns

407
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:53,786
about portion control.

408
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,330
‐ Portion control?
Like I'm five?

409
00:15:56,330 --> 00:15:57,665
‐ No, no, no.
[laughs]

410
00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,959
It's just that these pills
are highly addictive,

411
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,127
and we do need to make sure

412
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,628
that nobody is using

413
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,881
or distributing these pills
inappropriately.

414
00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:06,591
‐ [laughs]
So now you think I'm dealing?

415
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:08,050
‐ No.
‐ You just said

416
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,969
the shaming of chronic pain
treatment was over.

417
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:11,637
‐ And it is, but...

418
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,723
‐ Are you serious, Max?
‐ Come on.

419
00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,474
‐ That's not gonna work.
‐ No way.

420
00:16:15,474 --> 00:16:16,642
‐ Um...

421
00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,644
‐ What a joke.
‐ I'm outta here.

422
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:20,104
‐ Come on, Max.
‐ This is ridiculous.

423
00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:22,481
‐ Thanks for nothing.
‐ I'm closing this window.

424
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:25,651
[fast‐paced percussive music]

425
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,195
♪ ♪

426
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:36,329
‐ Thank you all for responding
to my multiple app requests.

427
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,831
I have some deliveries for you.

428
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:42,168
Addresses are grouped together
for maximum efficiency.

429
00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:44,503
‐ Those burritos?
‐ They are not.

430
00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:46,297
‐ Are your items
heat sensitive?

431
00:16:46,297 --> 00:16:48,925
‐ No, we're good.
So if you wanna grab your bag‐‐

432
00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:51,344
‐ Are dealing with breakable
items like figurines?

433
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:53,846
‐ Are they insured?
‐ Are we liable here?

434
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,474
‐ I‐‐no, it's very simple.

435
00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,809
Some of our patients
are having a hard time

436
00:16:58,809 --> 00:17:01,020
getting to the hospital
to pick up their prescriptions,

437
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,856
so I am hiring all of you

438
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,024
to solve that problem.

439
00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:07,485
‐ So we're delivering drugs.

440
00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:08,986
‐ [laughs]

441
00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:10,655
Technically, yes?

442
00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:14,533
But uh...

443
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:17,411
did I mention
there's a 25% tip?

444
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:20,248
‐ All right.

445
00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:22,541
♪ ♪

446
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:25,544
‐ Yo, how many
are we allowed to take?

447
00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:27,672
‐ Okay, okay.

448
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,881
That was smooth.

449
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:30,299
‐ That was the alcohol swipe.

450
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:32,885
‐ Getting started now.

451
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:35,012
‐ Oh, my God.
Distract me.

452
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,305
‐ Uh, distract you?

453
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:37,557
‐ Say something.
Anything.

454
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:38,849
‐ Um, okay.

455
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:42,019
Did you know that women blink
nearly twice as much as men?

456
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,729
‐ Nope, something interesting.

457
00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:46,065
‐ Fine, fine.
Okay.

458
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,234
‐ [gasps]
Aah, it feels like a sword!

459
00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:50,319
Like I'm literally
being stabbed by a sword!

460
00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:52,405
‐ All right, okay.
Um...

461
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:55,199
there's this gorgeous man,

462
00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:56,576
this doctor that I was seeing.

463
00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:58,369
‐ Yes, good.
‐ Am seeing.

464
00:17:58,369 --> 00:18:01,455
Well, mmm, was seeing.
[stammers] I don't know.

465
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:02,915
[laughs]
I don't know.

466
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:05,835
But we started dating
just when the pandemic hit,

467
00:18:05,835 --> 00:18:08,212
and I thought about him
for months during the lockdown.

468
00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,047
I fantasized about him.

469
00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,383
But then, the other day,

470
00:18:12,383 --> 00:18:14,802
when he reached out
to touch me, I pulled away.

471
00:18:16,387 --> 00:18:19,557
I recoiled like I was
physically repelled by him...

472
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,102
And I don't know.
I don't know.

473
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:24,353
Is it me?

474
00:18:24,353 --> 00:18:25,896
Am I that scared
to be touched by someone,

475
00:18:25,896 --> 00:18:28,232
or is it him?

476
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:31,277
Did what we have,

477
00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:33,738
did it just sort of...

478
00:18:34,905 --> 00:18:36,073
‐ No, keep going.

479
00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:37,867
But fast forward
to the interesting part.

480
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:41,078
Did he dump you?
Are you sad?

481
00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:43,414
[gasps]
Aah!

482
00:18:43,414 --> 00:18:45,333
‐ Was that a contraction?

483
00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:46,459
‐ Mm‐hmm.
Mmm!

484
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:47,793
‐ What?
The epidural seems to be

485
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,462
taking its sweet time.
‐ Yeah, it should've

486
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:51,631
kicked in by now.
Unfortunately,

487
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:54,634
I think the catheter's tip
is in the sub‐dural space.

488
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:56,135
‐ It didn't work?

489
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,471
‐ It didn't work?
[sighs]

490
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,307
Uh, can we try again
the epidural?

491
00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:03,434
[dramatic music]

492
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:06,479
‐ It's too late, sweetheart.
You're too far along.

493
00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:09,065
Ella, you're gonna
have to do this

494
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:10,816
on your own.

495
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,902
‐ No.
No.

496
00:19:12,902 --> 00:19:14,445
No, no, no, no, no, no.

497
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:18,282
‐ All right,
I know how this looks.

498
00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:21,952
I do.
Believe me.

499
00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:24,705
But these are my dad's words.

500
00:19:24,705 --> 00:19:26,707
They're his words,

501
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:27,625
and growing up,

502
00:19:27,625 --> 00:19:30,753
I had to hear them
practically every day.

503
00:19:30,753 --> 00:19:34,423
My father struggled with
his weight his entire life,

504
00:19:34,423 --> 00:19:36,926
and he didn't want me
to suffer the same fate.

505
00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,636
So at an early age,

506
00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:41,097
he took an interest
in my weight.

507
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:42,348
‐ An interest?

508
00:19:42,348 --> 00:19:44,016
‐ Mm‐hmm, yeah.

509
00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:46,477
It started around
the third grade.

510
00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:49,313
I filled out a little bit,
and, uh,

511
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:51,982
he would make me go
on crash diets

512
00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:53,859
out of the blue,

513
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:56,362
skip meals, take meal
replacement bars to school.

514
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:57,822
‐ As a nine‐year‐old?

515
00:19:57,822 --> 00:19:59,990
‐ Mm‐hmm.

516
00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:02,535
Yeah, and...

517
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:06,372
he would make me
take my shirt off

518
00:20:06,372 --> 00:20:08,582
so he could take pictures
of my body

519
00:20:08,582 --> 00:20:11,961
to, um, put up on the wall
in the basement

520
00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:14,505
next to the makeshift gym
that he'd built for me

521
00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:16,382
to track my process.

522
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:19,719
There was
a body progress chart.

523
00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:22,179
And if I would ever
walk by him,

524
00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:23,556
he would smack my gut and say,

525
00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:25,141
"Jesus, look at that thing."

526
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:26,726
[somber music]

527
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:29,061
"Got a lot of work left to do,
don't we, buddy?"

528
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,564
And what's worse is,

529
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:34,734
if I ever had a good weigh‐in,
which was not very often,

530
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:37,737
I, uh,
I would be over the moon

531
00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:39,905
because it would make me
feel loved.

532
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:44,201
♪ ♪

533
00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:46,537
[sighs]

534
00:20:46,537 --> 00:20:50,082
Then...this one time,

535
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,084
I guess I would've been
in middle school by this point,

536
00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:54,211
I just‐‐I‐‐

537
00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:55,880
I hated everything
about myself.

538
00:20:57,590 --> 00:21:00,092
So I tried to hang myself.

539
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,927
‐ What?

540
00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:03,596
Jesus, Iggy.

541
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,931
‐ No, it's okay.
[cries]

542
00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:09,351
It didn't work, obviously.

543
00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:11,187
Ironically, I was too fat

544
00:21:11,187 --> 00:21:12,897
for the rod
in the basement closet

545
00:21:12,897 --> 00:21:15,900
to hold me up,
and it crashed down on my head,

546
00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:18,611
and my mom heard the sound
and came to help me.

547
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:21,363
‐ What?
What did your dad say?

548
00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,073
‐ Oh.

549
00:21:23,073 --> 00:21:26,118
My dad, um, well,

550
00:21:26,118 --> 00:21:27,620
that night at my weigh‐in,

551
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:29,997
he just snapped
another polaroid for the wall

552
00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:32,291
and acted like nothing
ever happened.

553
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:34,585
‐ [scoffs]

554
00:21:34,585 --> 00:21:36,670
‐ That's my dad for you.

555
00:21:41,884 --> 00:21:43,427
‐ [sighs]

556
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:47,431
These are his words,

557
00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,141
but they don't control me
anymore.

558
00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:50,768
They do not.

559
00:21:50,768 --> 00:21:52,311
They serve as a reminder
of all of the things

560
00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,647
that I have conquered,
which is a lot,

561
00:21:54,647 --> 00:21:56,774
and sometimes
I look at these words,

562
00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:59,443
and they remind that
I'm not that kid anymore

563
00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:01,320
and that I'm making
better decisions.

564
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,781
I'm making healthy decisions
in my life.

565
00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:10,162
And that I no longer need to
stand around with my shirt off

566
00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,873
and let others judge me.
‐ What?

567
00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:16,252
You know that's not
what I was doing, right?

568
00:22:16,252 --> 00:22:18,420
‐ I'm fine.

569
00:22:18,420 --> 00:22:20,297
I am more than fine.

570
00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:21,799
You can rest easy.

571
00:22:21,799 --> 00:22:25,427
Now if you'll excuse me,
I have patients to see.

572
00:22:26,470 --> 00:22:27,680
[door clicks open]

573
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,140
‐ No, I'm‐‐I'm being careful.

574
00:22:30,140 --> 00:22:32,434
Yeah.

575
00:22:32,434 --> 00:22:34,854
Ma, I'm gonna see you soon.

576
00:22:34,854 --> 00:22:37,815
Okay, yeah.
I love you too.

577
00:22:37,815 --> 00:22:39,525
All right.

578
00:22:39,525 --> 00:22:42,027
‐ Heard you pulled off
one hell of a TAVR.

579
00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:43,821
Just this side of genius.

580
00:22:43,821 --> 00:22:45,698
‐ I accept your apology, Max.

581
00:22:45,698 --> 00:22:46,991
‐ You need anything else
while you're here?

582
00:22:46,991 --> 00:22:48,951
‐ Aw, no, just catching up
with some folks.

583
00:22:48,951 --> 00:22:51,537
You know, I missed my favorite
scrub nurse in OR today, JJ.

584
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,705
‐ Devlin.
‐ Yeah.

585
00:22:52,705 --> 00:22:54,164
‐ He passed away
a few months ago.

586
00:22:54,164 --> 00:22:55,541
COVID.

587
00:22:56,584 --> 00:22:58,335
‐ [sighs]
That's too bad.

588
00:22:58,335 --> 00:22:59,962
‐ Everything's changed.

589
00:22:59,962 --> 00:23:01,839
‐ Dr. Max Goodwin.
‐ That's me.

590
00:23:01,839 --> 00:23:04,300
‐ You're under arrest.
‐ Whoa, what's going on?

591
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:05,634
‐ For what?

592
00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:07,136
‐ For writing
700 Oxycodone prescriptions,

593
00:23:07,136 --> 00:23:08,721
each one over 100 milligrams,

594
00:23:08,721 --> 00:23:10,347
and distributing them
with bike messengers.

595
00:23:10,347 --> 00:23:12,182
‐ Oh, that.

596
00:23:12,182 --> 00:23:14,226
‐ It's nice to see some things
haven't changed.

597
00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,896
[beeper beeping]

598
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:20,900
[fast‐paced dramatic music]

599
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:21,734
‐ BP's 80/40 and falling.

600
00:23:21,734 --> 00:23:22,985
‐ Push epi, I'm coming in.

601
00:23:22,985 --> 00:23:24,904
I need an echo over here.

602
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,071
‐ What happened?

603
00:23:26,071 --> 00:23:29,074
‐ The clip didn't hold.
His heart is failing.

604
00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:33,704
♪ ♪

605
00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:40,502
‐ [sighs]

606
00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:43,881
[fast‐paced percussive music]

607
00:23:43,881 --> 00:23:45,215
‐ The DA only agreed

608
00:23:45,215 --> 00:23:47,259
to not press charges
for narcotics trafficking

609
00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:48,594
because
you're an essential worker.

610
00:23:48,594 --> 00:23:50,763
‐ Huh.
‐ Congratulations.

611
00:23:50,763 --> 00:23:52,765
You're one of the select few
to benefit from COVID‐19.

612
00:23:52,765 --> 00:23:54,099
‐ Thanks for getting me out.

613
00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:55,768
‐ I have half a mind
to leave you in there.

614
00:23:55,768 --> 00:23:57,728
‐ You know, pharmacies
mail opioids all the time.

615
00:23:57,728 --> 00:24:00,272
Bike messengers
are almost the same.

616
00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:02,399
‐ I wonder if you've ever
considered how exhausting it is

617
00:24:02,399 --> 00:24:03,567
to be your boss.

618
00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:05,611
All your wonderful ideas

619
00:24:05,611 --> 00:24:06,695
that come with such chaos,

620
00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:08,405
every single one.

621
00:24:08,405 --> 00:24:09,740
[sighs]
It's funny.

622
00:24:09,740 --> 00:24:12,618
The thing you're best at is the
part of my job I hate the most.

623
00:24:12,618 --> 00:24:14,578
You ignore reality.
‐ That's not fair.

624
00:24:14,578 --> 00:24:17,665
‐ Says the man who just
sent 70,000 milligrams of Oxy

625
00:24:17,665 --> 00:24:19,166
out into the street
via bike messenger.

626
00:24:19,166 --> 00:24:21,085
I know it seems
like a good idea.

627
00:24:21,085 --> 00:24:23,253
Hell, it might even be
a good idea,

628
00:24:23,253 --> 00:24:25,756
but it's my job to deal
with the reality of your ideas,

629
00:24:25,756 --> 00:24:28,300
in this case criminal reality.
Optics matter.

630
00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:30,386
‐ Patients matter.

631
00:24:30,386 --> 00:24:33,138
‐ I'm glad you're
helping people, Max, truly.

632
00:24:33,138 --> 00:24:35,808
But your plan
has no accountability.

633
00:24:35,808 --> 00:24:37,309
You don't know where
these drugs are going.

634
00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:38,727
You just don't.

635
00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:41,772
And opioids,
the potential for abuse,

636
00:24:41,772 --> 00:24:44,400
it's a very emotional issue.

637
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,277
To many people,
opioids aren't pain medicine.

638
00:24:47,277 --> 00:24:49,279
They're what killed
someone they loved.

639
00:24:49,279 --> 00:24:52,282
[somber music]

640
00:24:52,282 --> 00:24:53,993
♪ ♪

641
00:24:53,993 --> 00:24:55,786
‐ [sighs]

642
00:24:56,662 --> 00:24:58,706
‐ Wait.
Iggy.

643
00:24:58,706 --> 00:25:00,541
Iggy, I wasn't judging you.

644
00:25:00,541 --> 00:25:01,875
‐ You could've fooled me.

645
00:25:01,875 --> 00:25:04,628
‐ It was just‐‐people die
from what you're doing.

646
00:25:04,628 --> 00:25:05,963
‐ What did she say?
[chatter]

647
00:25:05,963 --> 00:25:07,631
[murmuring continues]

648
00:25:07,631 --> 00:25:11,927
[dramatic music]

649
00:25:11,927 --> 00:25:15,014
‐ In here.
In here.

650
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:22,104
‐ Ig.
‐ [sighs]

651
00:25:22,104 --> 00:25:24,314
‐ Ig, look, I'm sorry
for making a scene.

652
00:25:24,314 --> 00:25:25,858
‐ You should be.

653
00:25:25,858 --> 00:25:27,860
‐ It's just

654
00:25:27,860 --> 00:25:30,863
I've seen people in my ED
with eating disorders.

655
00:25:30,863 --> 00:25:32,823
I mean, I've known people
with eating disorders.

656
00:25:32,823 --> 00:25:34,533
‐ [sighs]
‐ Some of them...

657
00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:35,701
they're not here anymore.

658
00:25:35,701 --> 00:25:37,119
‐ Mm‐hmm.

659
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:38,871
‐ Look.

660
00:25:38,871 --> 00:25:41,373
I know as well anyone

661
00:25:41,373 --> 00:25:44,001
that the truth
is really difficult.

662
00:25:44,001 --> 00:25:47,171
‐ I'm sorry.
What are you doing?

663
00:25:47,171 --> 00:25:49,715
Are you comparing your issues
to mine right now?

664
00:25:49,715 --> 00:25:51,383
Let me just mirror
that back for you

665
00:25:51,383 --> 00:25:52,843
so you can hear it out loud.

666
00:25:52,843 --> 00:25:55,304
I'm on the Jimmy Kimmel diet,

667
00:25:55,304 --> 00:25:58,265
and you almost killed a patient
because you are a drug addict.

668
00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:02,853
Not the same.
‐ That was way out of line.

669
00:26:02,853 --> 00:26:04,897
‐ I'm outta line?
It's not hard, Lauren.

670
00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:06,231
This is a hospital.

671
00:26:06,231 --> 00:26:07,900
There's only one line
that matters.

672
00:26:07,900 --> 00:26:10,694
You were hurting patients.
I am not.

673
00:26:10,694 --> 00:26:12,154
Plain and simple!

674
00:26:12,154 --> 00:26:14,031
‐ Patients aren't
the only people you can hurt.

675
00:26:14,031 --> 00:26:15,699
‐ Oh, yeah?
Well, I think the janitors

676
00:26:15,699 --> 00:26:17,367
are safe from my eating too.
‐ Yeah?

677
00:26:17,367 --> 00:26:19,369
What about your kids?

678
00:26:20,162 --> 00:26:21,914
‐ Excuse me?
‐ You're starving yourself.

679
00:26:21,914 --> 00:26:23,373
You think
they don't notice that?

680
00:26:23,373 --> 00:26:24,583
‐ You stop talking.
‐ How many meals have you

681
00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:25,667
had with them where you

682
00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:26,585
haven't eaten anything?
‐ Stop!

683
00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:28,045
‐ How many have
you skipped altogether?

684
00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:29,379
I mean, what kind
of screwed up issues

685
00:26:29,379 --> 00:26:30,923
are your kids gonna have
with food because of you?

686
00:26:30,923 --> 00:26:32,925
[knocking]
Occupied!

687
00:26:35,427 --> 00:26:37,387
‐ It's a bad time, Gladys.

688
00:26:37,387 --> 00:26:39,556
‐ It's Dr. Kapoor.

689
00:26:39,556 --> 00:26:40,933
‐ The clip failed,

690
00:26:40,933 --> 00:26:42,935
tore right through
the valve leaflets.

691
00:26:42,935 --> 00:26:44,103
I'm gonna have to crack open
his chest

692
00:26:44,103 --> 00:26:45,562
and put in an artificial valve.

693
00:26:45,562 --> 00:26:47,397
‐ That's a big surgery.

694
00:26:47,397 --> 00:26:49,566
‐ I thought you said you
couldn't sew into the muscle.

695
00:26:49,566 --> 00:26:52,402
What changed?
‐ Nothing. Not a damn thing.

696
00:26:52,402 --> 00:26:55,239
‐ But he'll make it through
the surgery, right?

697
00:26:55,239 --> 00:26:58,242
[somber music]

698
00:26:58,242 --> 00:27:00,577
♪ ♪

699
00:27:00,577 --> 00:27:02,079
‐ That's why I thought
you should see him now,

700
00:27:02,079 --> 00:27:05,290
and have one more moment
with him

701
00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:07,417
in case...

702
00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:08,961
I'm gonna go prep.

703
00:27:08,961 --> 00:27:16,093
♪ ♪

704
00:27:16,802 --> 00:27:19,138
‐ [grunts]

705
00:27:19,138 --> 00:27:19,972
[sighs]

706
00:27:19,972 --> 00:27:22,140
‐ You're fully effaced
and dilated,

707
00:27:22,140 --> 00:27:24,393
but the baby's still
at minus three position.

708
00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:26,603
Ella, the delivery isn't
progressing as I had hoped.

709
00:27:26,603 --> 00:27:28,146
‐ What does that mean?

710
00:27:28,146 --> 00:27:30,816
‐ When your contraction comes,
you need to push real hard.

711
00:27:30,816 --> 00:27:32,776
‐ Oh, my God,
this is a disaster.

712
00:27:32,776 --> 00:27:35,112
‐ Maybe you
could hold her hand.

713
00:27:35,112 --> 00:27:38,407
‐ [heavy breathing]
‐ E‐Ella.

714
00:27:38,407 --> 00:27:39,116
Look.
Look.

715
00:27:39,116 --> 00:27:41,118
Count them out with me, okay?

716
00:27:41,118 --> 00:27:42,828
‐ [groans]
‐ Here we go.

717
00:27:42,828 --> 00:27:44,454
Give me
the biggest push you got.

718
00:27:44,454 --> 00:27:46,373
‐ You can do this.
Come on, come on.

719
00:27:46,373 --> 00:27:49,668
‐ No, I can't!
Stop, I don't want to!

720
00:27:49,668 --> 00:27:52,629
What if the baby's not okay?
What if I hurt it?

721
00:27:52,629 --> 00:27:55,465
What I ate undercooked meat
and didn't know it?

722
00:27:55,465 --> 00:27:57,301
And seven weeks ago
I took a bath

723
00:27:57,301 --> 00:27:58,594
right after the tub
was cleaned,

724
00:27:58,594 --> 00:27:59,803
and the water
probably had bleach in it.

725
00:27:59,803 --> 00:28:01,013
What kind of mom
is that careless?

726
00:28:01,013 --> 00:28:02,264
‐ You are not careless.

727
00:28:02,264 --> 00:28:04,975
You have disorder that sends
your pregnancy into overdrive,

728
00:28:04,975 --> 00:28:07,311
but you fought it,
and you've made it this far.

729
00:28:07,311 --> 00:28:09,646
‐ I cheated.
I got scans all the time.

730
00:28:09,646 --> 00:28:11,023
Sometimes two days in a row

731
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:12,649
in case something happened
while I was sleeping.

732
00:28:12,649 --> 00:28:14,276
But then everything shut down,

733
00:28:14,276 --> 00:28:16,028
and Vijay got sick,
and I don't know why,

734
00:28:16,028 --> 00:28:17,863
but I just convinced myself

735
00:28:17,863 --> 00:28:20,532
that the baby was going to be
okay as long as he was okay.

736
00:28:20,532 --> 00:28:21,867
What if Vijay's not okay?

737
00:28:21,867 --> 00:28:24,036
‐ Ella!
Everything on that monitor

738
00:28:24,036 --> 00:28:25,662
says that your baby
is going to be okay,

739
00:28:25,662 --> 00:28:26,997
but you have to deliver it...

740
00:28:26,997 --> 00:28:28,916
‐ No!
Oh.

741
00:28:28,916 --> 00:28:29,917
‐ Contractions peaking.
‐ Aah!

742
00:28:29,917 --> 00:28:31,168
‐ You can do it.

743
00:28:31,168 --> 00:28:32,544
Your baby needs you
to push now.

744
00:28:32,544 --> 00:28:35,339
‐ [grunts]
Aah.

745
00:28:36,632 --> 00:28:38,842
[crying]

746
00:28:41,637 --> 00:28:44,556
[crying]

747
00:28:51,521 --> 00:28:53,190
‐ Eh?

748
00:28:53,899 --> 00:28:56,234
‐ Yeah, yeah, buddy?
What is it?

749
00:28:57,527 --> 00:28:59,112
Hit me.

750
00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:02,658
‐ You're such a good dad.

751
00:29:02,658 --> 00:29:04,201
‐ Aw, I don't know.
I...

752
00:29:10,916 --> 00:29:13,543
‐ If this doesn't work out...

753
00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:18,548
Will you look after

754
00:29:18,548 --> 00:29:20,926
Ella and the baby?

755
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:26,890
‐ [crying]

756
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:57,754
‐ You've got this.

757
00:29:57,754 --> 00:29:59,631
You can do it.

758
00:30:00,966 --> 00:30:02,801
‐ Hey.

759
00:30:02,801 --> 00:30:04,136
And I am dying...

760
00:30:04,136 --> 00:30:05,595
‐ What are you talking about?
Don't be silly.

761
00:30:05,595 --> 00:30:06,972
You are going
to be annoying her

762
00:30:06,972 --> 00:30:08,598
for the rest of your life,
okay?

763
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,436
‐ Please.

764
00:30:15,105 --> 00:30:18,775
‐ If something happens, I...

765
00:30:18,775 --> 00:30:20,944
[cries]
Yes.

766
00:30:20,944 --> 00:30:23,113
Obviously.

767
00:30:24,614 --> 00:30:25,657
‐ Good.

768
00:30:25,657 --> 00:30:27,451
‐ [sighs]

769
00:30:41,965 --> 00:30:43,967
[somber music]

770
00:30:43,967 --> 00:30:46,344
‐ Listen, Iggy.

771
00:30:46,344 --> 00:30:48,096
‐ Lauren, I'm fine.
‐ No.

772
00:30:48,096 --> 00:30:50,474
I never should've dragged
your kids into this.

773
00:30:52,184 --> 00:30:54,144
I'm really sorry.

774
00:30:56,438 --> 00:30:59,608
‐ A couple nights ago,
I was, uh,

775
00:30:59,608 --> 00:31:01,443
I was wearing
this nice new sweater

776
00:31:01,443 --> 00:31:03,153
that Martin gave me,
and, um...

777
00:31:06,698 --> 00:31:08,909
Harper told me that
I looked handsome in it.

778
00:31:11,036 --> 00:31:13,747
Then I immediately grabbed
my stomach,

779
00:31:13,747 --> 00:31:15,707
and I told her
that she was wrong.

780
00:31:18,210 --> 00:31:19,961
It just popped out of mouth.

781
00:31:19,961 --> 00:31:21,963
[crying]

782
00:31:25,509 --> 00:31:27,844
I say things like that
all the time.

783
00:31:30,472 --> 00:31:32,390
And Vijay thinks
that I'm a great father?

784
00:31:32,390 --> 00:31:33,642
[crying]

785
00:31:33,642 --> 00:31:35,519
I'm teaching my kids

786
00:31:35,519 --> 00:31:38,688
that someone who looks like me
doesn't deserve to be loved.

787
00:31:41,316 --> 00:31:45,070
That is the same lesson
that my dad taught me.

788
00:31:45,070 --> 00:31:47,030
Aw, man.

789
00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:51,701
He just used different words.

790
00:31:55,288 --> 00:31:56,581
‐ Iggy.

791
00:31:58,458 --> 00:32:01,253
These aren't your dad's words.

792
00:32:01,253 --> 00:32:02,420
You wrote this.

793
00:32:02,420 --> 00:32:04,005
‐ I know.

794
00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:07,717
‐ These are your words.
You're calling yourself this,

795
00:32:07,717 --> 00:32:11,263
and you're keep suffering
until you stop.

796
00:32:11,263 --> 00:32:14,224
‐ [sighs]
If I can't stop,

797
00:32:14,224 --> 00:32:17,727
this note, that voice...

798
00:32:19,771 --> 00:32:22,732
It's the thing about myself
that feels the most true.

799
00:32:23,775 --> 00:32:27,112
How do you stop believing that?

800
00:32:28,029 --> 00:32:31,366
‐ Well, you could try
talking to a therapist.

801
00:32:31,366 --> 00:32:33,034
‐ [crying]

802
00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:36,246
‐ Hey, I did.

803
00:32:38,248 --> 00:32:39,958
He saved my life.

804
00:32:47,048 --> 00:32:48,466
‐ [sighs]

805
00:32:48,466 --> 00:32:50,260
‐ Come here.

806
00:32:52,596 --> 00:32:55,599
‐ Thank you.
‐ Yeah.

807
00:32:55,599 --> 00:32:59,978
‐ ♪ Even if we try ♪

808
00:32:59,978 --> 00:33:04,816
♪ Even if we try ♪

809
00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:07,652
♪ To make ourselves ♪

810
00:33:07,652 --> 00:33:10,614
♪ All right ♪

811
00:33:10,614 --> 00:33:15,118
♪ To mend our severed lives ♪

812
00:33:15,118 --> 00:33:16,620
[no audio]

813
00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:20,874
♪ While all the rivers rage ♪

814
00:33:20,874 --> 00:33:25,670
♪ Descend upon the sage ♪

815
00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:30,175
♪ Alone on willowed eves ♪

816
00:33:30,175 --> 00:33:34,888
♪ I lift my voice to sing ♪

817
00:33:35,847 --> 00:33:39,851
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

818
00:33:39,851 --> 00:33:42,354
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

819
00:33:42,354 --> 00:33:46,441
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

820
00:33:46,441 --> 00:33:49,027
♪ Ooh ♪

821
00:33:49,027 --> 00:33:52,239
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

822
00:33:55,158 --> 00:33:58,203
♪ Down long, hollow grove ♪

823
00:33:59,871 --> 00:34:04,209
♪ Its wilting,
winding bones ♪

824
00:34:04,209 --> 00:34:08,630
♪ Come on, Johnny, please ♪

825
00:34:08,630 --> 00:34:14,552
♪ Won't you speak to me? ♪

826
00:34:14,552 --> 00:34:16,888
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

827
00:34:16,888 --> 00:34:18,890
♪ Ooh ♪

828
00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:21,351
‐ Ready to restart the heart.

829
00:34:21,351 --> 00:34:22,519
‐ Everything's solid.

830
00:34:22,519 --> 00:34:24,562
‐ Charging.
Clear.

831
00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:25,939
‐ Suctioning.

832
00:34:29,901 --> 00:34:31,903
‐ Quarter's ready.

833
00:34:31,903 --> 00:34:35,740
[tense music]

834
00:34:35,740 --> 00:34:38,743
[machine beeping]

835
00:34:38,743 --> 00:34:41,579
‐ We did it.

836
00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:43,373
‐ Good job, everyone.

837
00:34:43,373 --> 00:34:46,751
[warm music]

838
00:34:46,751 --> 00:34:48,712
‐ [sighs]

839
00:34:48,712 --> 00:34:49,921
Ooh.

840
00:34:49,921 --> 00:34:52,215
‐ All right,
let's close him up.

841
00:34:52,215 --> 00:34:58,263
♪ ♪

842
00:34:58,263 --> 00:35:00,265
[machine beeping rapidly]
BP is dropping.

843
00:35:00,265 --> 00:35:01,433
‐ What?

844
00:35:01,433 --> 00:35:03,226
‐ Heart valve's not holding.
‐ It's slipping.

845
00:35:03,226 --> 00:35:04,853
Give me a 3‐0 proline
on the needle driver.

846
00:35:04,853 --> 00:35:06,396
‐ Times two.

847
00:35:06,396 --> 00:35:09,774
‐ You work the septum,
I'll work the free wall.

848
00:35:09,774 --> 00:35:11,443
I'm gonna have to get him
back on bypass.

849
00:35:11,443 --> 00:35:13,111
‐ We can't reestablish
aortic cannulation.

850
00:35:13,111 --> 00:35:15,405
‐ [grunts]
‐ As a backup, yes.

851
00:35:17,115 --> 00:35:18,783
‐ My stitches aren't holding.
‐ Neither are mine.

852
00:35:18,783 --> 00:35:20,118
‐ Trying 5‐0.
‐ Suction needs to be higher.

853
00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:21,786
‐ I'm not getting any purchase.

854
00:35:21,786 --> 00:35:23,747
‐ Another bag.

855
00:35:23,747 --> 00:35:25,582
‐ Come on.
Hold, damn it.

856
00:35:25,582 --> 00:35:27,125
‐ Flash sterilized.

857
00:35:29,711 --> 00:35:32,714
[somber music]

858
00:35:32,714 --> 00:35:39,804
♪ ♪

859
00:35:44,309 --> 00:35:45,977
‐ Ansuya.

860
00:35:45,977 --> 00:35:49,105
[ethereal music]

861
00:35:50,148 --> 00:35:52,275
Ansuya.

862
00:35:56,946 --> 00:36:04,120
‐ ♪ Oh ♪

863
00:36:05,038 --> 00:36:08,792
♪ Oh ♪

864
00:36:08,792 --> 00:36:13,505
♪ Oh, oh ♪

865
00:36:13,505 --> 00:36:16,216
‐ Ansuya.

866
00:36:17,509 --> 00:36:19,678
‐ Vijay.

867
00:36:19,678 --> 00:36:26,810
‐ ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

868
00:36:36,820 --> 00:36:38,571
‐ Eat this.

869
00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:43,326
‐ I don't need it.

870
00:36:45,370 --> 00:36:48,248
All I need is you.

871
00:36:48,248 --> 00:36:50,750
‐ It will give you strength

872
00:36:50,750 --> 00:36:53,795
for our granddaughter.

873
00:36:53,795 --> 00:36:55,213
‐ Granddaughter?
[laughs]

874
00:36:55,213 --> 00:36:57,716
‐ She needs her Dadaji.

875
00:36:57,716 --> 00:37:04,931
‐ ♪ Oh ♪

876
00:37:05,682 --> 00:37:12,063
♪ Oh ♪

877
00:37:13,523 --> 00:37:20,447
♪ Oh ♪

878
00:37:21,740 --> 00:37:23,950
‐ Vijay?

879
00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:29,080
‐ ♪ Ah ♪

880
00:37:31,708 --> 00:37:34,669
[machine beeping]

881
00:37:34,669 --> 00:37:36,546
‐ He's waking up.

882
00:37:36,546 --> 00:37:38,089
Oh, thank God.
Vijay.

883
00:37:38,089 --> 00:37:39,758
[warm music]

884
00:37:39,758 --> 00:37:41,760
‐ Welcome back, Dr. Kapoor.

885
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:49,058
♪ ♪

886
00:37:49,058 --> 00:37:51,019
‐ [chuckles]

887
00:37:51,019 --> 00:37:52,520
[sighs]

888
00:37:55,565 --> 00:37:58,401
[baby crying]

889
00:38:11,623 --> 00:38:14,751
‐ [laughs]
Happy birthday, little one.

890
00:38:14,751 --> 00:38:16,544
[both laughing]

891
00:38:16,544 --> 00:38:19,464
[baby cooing]

892
00:38:22,926 --> 00:38:25,136
‐ Uh, K‐Karen!

893
00:38:25,136 --> 00:38:27,639
‐ Are the cops chasing you now?
‐ Uh, I don't know,

894
00:38:27,639 --> 00:38:29,974
but I did come up with a solve
for our opioid issue,

895
00:38:29,974 --> 00:38:31,643
and I think you're really
gonna like it.

896
00:38:31,643 --> 00:38:33,144
‐ And here I thought
we knew each other better.

897
00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:34,813
‐ Watermarking.

898
00:38:34,813 --> 00:38:38,483
So every single opioid
that New Amsterdam sends out

899
00:38:38,483 --> 00:38:39,984
into the world
will be watermarked

900
00:38:39,984 --> 00:38:42,904
with invisible,
fluorescent fibers.

901
00:38:42,904 --> 00:38:45,156
Every patient will have access

902
00:38:45,156 --> 00:38:47,909
to the medicine they need
and without shame.

903
00:38:47,909 --> 00:38:50,829
And they'll be able
to manage their pain,

904
00:38:50,829 --> 00:38:54,207
and they'll be able to live
functional lives.

905
00:38:54,207 --> 00:38:56,459
But if those pills ever do
end up in the street,

906
00:38:56,459 --> 00:38:58,169
or in the wrong hands,
we'll know.

907
00:38:58,169 --> 00:39:01,005
There will be
no drug trafficking,

908
00:39:01,005 --> 00:39:04,676
and there will
be accountability.

909
00:39:06,177 --> 00:39:08,012
Oh, and I almost forgot
the best part.

910
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:11,015
The Nylers are gonna
pay for it.

911
00:39:11,015 --> 00:39:12,684
‐ Why would they do that?

912
00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:14,435
‐ They kinda have to.

913
00:39:14,435 --> 00:39:15,520
Part of their settlement
includes

914
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,523
donating millions of dollars
to public hospitals,

915
00:39:18,523 --> 00:39:19,858
just like ours.

916
00:39:19,858 --> 00:39:21,359
‐ [laughs]

917
00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:23,486
I don't know what to say.

918
00:39:23,486 --> 00:39:25,613
It sounds like
a well‐thought‐out

919
00:39:25,613 --> 00:39:27,031
and realistic plan.

920
00:39:27,031 --> 00:39:28,783
‐ I know.
Weird, right?

921
00:39:28,783 --> 00:39:30,493
‐ [chuckles]

922
00:39:30,493 --> 00:39:33,204
‐ Karen.

923
00:39:33,204 --> 00:39:36,749
Thank you
for keeping me accountable.

924
00:39:36,749 --> 00:39:38,418
‐ That's my job.

925
00:39:40,211 --> 00:39:43,464
And every once and a while,
it's worth it.

926
00:39:49,804 --> 00:39:52,765
[keys clacking]

927
00:40:07,071 --> 00:40:09,699
‐ I'm not ready.

928
00:40:11,534 --> 00:40:13,202
‐ Okay.

929
00:40:16,039 --> 00:40:20,126
‐ I mean,
I'm not ready to call it.

930
00:40:34,182 --> 00:40:37,101
[hopeful music]

931
00:40:37,101 --> 00:40:44,275
♪ ♪

932
00:41:03,294 --> 00:41:06,255
[somber music]

933
00:41:06,255 --> 00:41:13,429
♪ ♪

934
00:42:00,768 --> 00:42:04,147
‐ I should've been here.

935
00:42:04,147 --> 00:42:06,649
‐ Well, you're here now.

936
00:42:54,864 --> 00:42:56,866
[thunder rumbling]

937
00:42:56,866 --> 00:42:58,993
[projector clicking]