1 00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:45,147 I was prey for nearly two decades of my life. 2 00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:50,777 A throwaway child. A discard. 3 00:01:50,861 --> 00:01:53,280 A throwaway child. A discard. 4 00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:54,698 Discard. 5 00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:57,868 I had to fend for myself. 6 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,662 Against the elements. 7 00:02:01,538 --> 00:02:04,666 Against other people. Against myself. 8 00:02:09,086 --> 00:02:10,422 My demons. 9 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:41,138 I'd like to thank our guest today, journalist Poppy Parnell, 10 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,682 host of the smash-hit podcast, Reconsidered. 11 00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:47,144 Poppy, one last question. What's up next for you? 12 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,229 How do you follow up the Warren Cave season? 13 00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:55,652 Well, doing the Warren Cave story came at a huge personal cost for me. 14 00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:58,280 So, I'm just gonna take my time 15 00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:01,450 and be very thoughtful about the next story I choose to take on. 16 00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:04,411 Well, don't pull a Lauryn Hill on us and keep us waiting, Poppy. 17 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:05,996 We want a new season now. 18 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:08,957 But you all heard it. A little bit longer. Thanks again for joining us. 19 00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:10,334 Well, thank you for having me. 20 00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:26,058 Hey, Poppy. 21 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:28,060 -Hey, Herbie. -The usual? 22 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,521 -Always. Hey. -All right. 23 00:04:34,066 --> 00:04:35,067 Surprise! 24 00:04:40,364 --> 00:04:41,657 Yep, we got her. 25 00:04:42,366 --> 00:04:43,617 Hi. 26 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:46,119 -Hey. -So good to see you. 27 00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:47,955 It's so good to see you. 28 00:04:49,706 --> 00:04:51,834 -You look beautiful. -You look gorgeous. 29 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:54,962 Beat that. 30 00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:59,299 I almost got you there. Then I really got you there. 31 00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:00,592 Come on. 32 00:05:00,676 --> 00:05:02,845 -That's right. I don't know what to say. -Goddamn. 33 00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:04,555 -Thank you. -Come on. 34 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:05,848 You still cheating. 35 00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:08,100 Daddy, you can't say that. 36 00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:09,393 -Course I can. -Come on. 37 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,854 She stole from me the first day she came into this bar. 38 00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:15,691 Grimy little hands right in that till and slipped off before I could catch her. 39 00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:18,694 Only got a block until these two cornered me in the alley. 40 00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:20,279 So then y'all jumped her? 41 00:05:20,362 --> 00:05:21,572 We sure did. 42 00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,323 But she was feral, so we had to work at it. 43 00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:27,411 We tussled and threw trash at each other 44 00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,329 until you couldn't tell one of us from the next. 45 00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,749 All three of them came back smelling like fresh hell. 46 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,501 What were y'all? Ten, 11 years old? 47 00:05:36,086 --> 00:05:37,129 Yeah. 48 00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:39,840 World-famous author. 49 00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:42,718 Been a long time since we've seen you. 50 00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:46,388 Well, I spend more time in hotel rooms than my own bed. 51 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:50,934 Hate that all those years in the streets, you never thought to come here. 52 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:55,105 To us. 53 00:05:57,399 --> 00:05:58,650 You over here cheating? 54 00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:02,279 Oh, my God! I'm never gonna live that down. 55 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,073 -Nope. -Never. Looking like new money. 56 00:06:05,157 --> 00:06:06,325 Hi, hi. 57 00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:13,916 All right, come on. 58 00:06:26,929 --> 00:06:29,890 Can y'all believe we're back together again? 59 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,533 I'm sorry I wasn't here for you when things got crazy. 60 00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:51,078 You called, and you wrote, and that was all I needed. 61 00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:53,163 And I survived. 62 00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:56,500 That's what we do, hon. We survive. 63 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,335 Makes us stronger. 64 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,463 It's what they sold us. 65 00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:05,926 Ingram? Is he coming tomorrow? 66 00:07:06,844 --> 00:07:07,845 One hopes. 67 00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:12,850 It's still a little tricky, but we're just trying to remember the romance. 68 00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:15,811 Sounds kind of nice, actually. 69 00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,273 And Josh? He'll be there? 70 00:07:19,982 --> 00:07:22,192 Of course. 71 00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:24,152 Why wouldn't he? 72 00:07:31,869 --> 00:07:33,871 -See you tomorrow. -See you tomorrow. 73 00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:52,264 I am so happy to see you both. 74 00:07:53,182 --> 00:07:54,183 Together. 75 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,981 -Yay. -I'm gonna get us some drinks. 76 00:08:01,064 --> 00:08:03,275 -Okay. -Yeah. Okay. Hey, come with me. 77 00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:10,157 Wait. 78 00:08:10,699 --> 00:08:11,700 Is that... 79 00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:15,662 This is the very first draft of the Discard manuscript. 80 00:08:15,746 --> 00:08:17,247 Complete with your editing notes. 81 00:08:18,916 --> 00:08:20,542 This wouldn't have happened without you. 82 00:08:21,877 --> 00:08:24,588 It gave me chills the first time I read it. 83 00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,674 You've come a long way since you sat next to me on that bus. 84 00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:31,845 Those two little girls are never far enough away, are they? 85 00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:34,389 No, but the world does not need to know that. 86 00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:36,433 Excuse me. 87 00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:38,393 Hey, so some of the scholarship kids are here. 88 00:08:38,477 --> 00:08:41,063 -Would you come meet them? -Okay, yeah-- yeah. But first... 89 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:43,440 This is Ivy Abbott. She's my second here at Shelter, 90 00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:46,068 and I don't know what I'd do without her. 91 00:08:46,777 --> 00:08:47,945 Ivy, this is Poppy. 92 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,738 Very, very nice to meet you. 93 00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:50,822 Nice to meet you. 94 00:08:50,906 --> 00:08:53,367 Would you mind if I steal Micah away for just one moment? 95 00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:55,285 -Not at all. -Perfect. 96 00:08:55,369 --> 00:08:56,370 -I'll be back. -Okay. 97 00:08:57,871 --> 00:08:58,872 Wow. 98 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,552 Quite the turnout, huh? 99 00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,556 Josh. Oh, my God. 100 00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:17,015 Come here. 101 00:09:17,683 --> 00:09:18,684 I missed you. 102 00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:21,019 I missed you too. 103 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:24,314 Wow. 104 00:09:25,274 --> 00:09:28,318 The two of you have become quite the power couple. 105 00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:30,696 Micah is world-famous 106 00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:34,074 and your documentary about the Sons of Ivar is everywhere. 107 00:09:35,325 --> 00:09:37,286 Who knew it would lead to all this? 108 00:09:38,996 --> 00:09:40,080 Who knew? 109 00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,375 What's going on? 110 00:09:45,002 --> 00:09:46,295 You all right? 111 00:09:49,798 --> 00:09:50,966 What does that mean? 112 00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:56,180 Don't mind me. I have Mother Russia coursing through my body. 113 00:09:56,263 --> 00:10:00,267 You know, fatalism and-- and angst. They run in my blood. 114 00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:02,895 You know you can tell me anything. 115 00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:06,773 Come by the studio later. We'll talk then. 116 00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:09,610 This will all end at some point, right? 117 00:10:11,653 --> 00:10:17,492 Micah's memoir, Discard, shared her story in such excruciating detail. 118 00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:23,081 Her pain reached millions, and it inspired just as many. 119 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:29,087 And now without further delay, the woman of the hour, Micah Keith. 120 00:10:33,634 --> 00:10:34,801 Good evening. 121 00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,847 That is a terrified young girl in there. 122 00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:44,645 Thirteen years old. Left to survive on her own. 123 00:10:46,522 --> 00:10:48,732 Forgotten. A discard. 124 00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:52,945 And still survived. 125 00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:57,741 When I first saw this installation, I took to my bed for three days. 126 00:10:57,824 --> 00:11:02,538 I just had such a hard time looking at her. At me. 127 00:11:04,540 --> 00:11:05,666 All these years later. 128 00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,295 I stole. I cheated. I fought. 129 00:11:11,088 --> 00:11:12,297 I drank. 130 00:11:13,090 --> 00:11:14,258 I did drugs. 131 00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:17,761 My body was taken. Not always with my permission. 132 00:11:19,304 --> 00:11:21,598 And that made her nothing. 133 00:11:21,682 --> 00:11:23,141 That made me nothing. 134 00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:28,772 And so, I wrote myself into existence. 135 00:11:30,107 --> 00:11:31,733 To keep from disappearing. 136 00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:38,532 The goal here tonight is to make sure 137 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:44,580 that every discarded young person has a truly safe home 138 00:11:44,663 --> 00:11:49,960 and not just that safe place in their imagination. 139 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:54,548 Thank you. 140 00:11:58,510 --> 00:12:00,679 Thank you. Thank you. 141 00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:05,893 So before I go, I once again want to thank the Ryvlin Gallery, 142 00:12:05,976 --> 00:12:08,937 my publishers, Simon & Schuster, 143 00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:12,983 my incredible staff at Shelter, all over, 144 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:18,655 and my friend, Poppy Parnell, who set me on this path. 145 00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:22,826 She saw my collection of scribbles and recognized them as something more. 146 00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:27,664 And her bone-deep belief in what I could offer the world 147 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,459 was one of the cornerstones of my success. 148 00:12:32,002 --> 00:12:35,506 And then, of course, last but never least, my husband, Josh. 149 00:12:35,589 --> 00:12:37,216 Josh, where are you? 150 00:12:38,509 --> 00:12:39,885 Honey? 151 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:48,101 Anyway, he knows how much he means to me, and I thank him truly. 152 00:12:48,185 --> 00:12:51,313 And all of you, enjoy. 153 00:12:54,066 --> 00:12:57,277 You know, every state I was in, every place I visited, 154 00:12:57,361 --> 00:12:59,279 people were talking about your podcast. 155 00:13:00,239 --> 00:13:01,949 That's nice to hear. 156 00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:06,036 Because I've been accused of single-handedly destroying journalism. 157 00:13:08,372 --> 00:13:10,958 You know, all I've ever wanted to do was help people, 158 00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:13,001 and I get hate mail all the time. 159 00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:18,590 "Fraud." "Opportunist." "Exploiter." 160 00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,926 My personal favorite, "witch." 161 00:13:22,845 --> 00:13:24,388 You made an impact. 162 00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:26,557 And that always makes waves. 163 00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:31,144 Is Josh okay? 164 00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:34,022 He seemed kind of off at the gallery. 165 00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:37,609 Growing pains, you know? 166 00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:43,699 Shelter just took off this past year, and I think that we're just adjusting. 167 00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:52,082 Wow. 168 00:13:58,630 --> 00:13:59,756 All right. 169 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,345 Josh? 170 00:14:09,141 --> 00:14:10,142 Josh? 171 00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:11,894 Hello? 172 00:14:14,021 --> 00:14:15,480 Maybe he went home. 173 00:14:15,564 --> 00:14:18,734 Well, he's not answering his phone. I'm gonna check the back patio. 174 00:14:19,318 --> 00:14:21,486 -Where's your bathroom? -Over the bridge. 175 00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:24,406 And then you kind of go to the left. 176 00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,490 Okay. 177 00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:29,786 If you want anything, get it. Wine, beer. 178 00:14:29,870 --> 00:14:30,871 Thank you. 179 00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:32,789 Whatever you want, okay? 180 00:14:33,457 --> 00:14:34,499 Hey, Josh? 181 00:15:04,029 --> 00:15:05,030 Josh? 182 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:46,655 -Poppy? -Ingram! 183 00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:49,950 Ingram! 184 00:15:50,742 --> 00:15:52,369 -Poppy! -Oh, my God. 185 00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:53,745 -Poppy. -Oh, my God. 186 00:15:53,829 --> 00:15:56,623 -You okay? -It's Josh. 187 00:15:56,707 --> 00:15:59,418 It's Josh. It's Josh. It's Josh. 188 00:16:03,297 --> 00:16:04,381 Poppy? 189 00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:07,426 -Micah. -What's wrong? 190 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,677 What? What? 191 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,179 -Honey. Stop. -What? 192 00:16:11,138 --> 00:16:12,514 -What is it? -You don't want to see this. 193 00:16:12,598 --> 00:16:14,224 -Don't want to see what? -You don't want to see this. 194 00:16:14,308 --> 00:16:15,559 -Poppy. -Don't-- 195 00:16:18,812 --> 00:16:19,980 Oh, my God. 196 00:16:46,381 --> 00:16:48,091 That's pretty much it. 197 00:16:49,426 --> 00:16:50,427 Thank you. 198 00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:00,437 You okay, babe? 199 00:17:01,605 --> 00:17:03,815 -No. -You found the body. 200 00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:06,693 You are? 201 00:17:07,778 --> 00:17:10,113 You got blood on your jacket there. 202 00:17:13,116 --> 00:17:14,367 And you are? 203 00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,119 Inspector Aames. 204 00:17:17,913 --> 00:17:20,499 Don't ask me why the SFPD doesn't use detective. 205 00:17:22,459 --> 00:17:25,712 Well, we gave our statement to your colleague. I'm sure he can fill you in. 206 00:17:25,796 --> 00:17:28,173 I prefer to hear a story the second time it's told. 207 00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,094 I'm gonna check on Micah. 208 00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:33,178 Yeah. 209 00:17:33,929 --> 00:17:35,180 It's Poppy, right? 210 00:17:36,390 --> 00:17:37,891 You're not recording, are you? 211 00:17:41,228 --> 00:17:42,646 How long did you know Joshua? 212 00:17:44,189 --> 00:17:45,649 Twenty years. 213 00:17:47,943 --> 00:17:51,280 So, what do you think of his latest documentary, Drengir? 214 00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:53,991 What in the world does that have to do with anything? 215 00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:56,660 He made a film that pissed off the Sons of Ivar. 216 00:17:56,743 --> 00:17:58,912 It may be a straight line from point A to point B. 217 00:17:58,996 --> 00:18:01,748 That's your story? That fast? 218 00:18:01,832 --> 00:18:03,208 What's yours? 219 00:18:07,713 --> 00:18:09,173 I'm gonna check on Micah. 220 00:18:13,552 --> 00:18:14,928 Hey, honey. 221 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:19,266 He was just here. 222 00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:23,020 Then he's gone. 223 00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:25,647 Can we please take her home? 224 00:18:27,733 --> 00:18:30,277 Yeah, we'll let you know if we have any other information. 225 00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:32,362 Can I have a lock of his hair? 226 00:18:37,451 --> 00:18:38,744 I'll see what I can do. 227 00:18:41,496 --> 00:18:42,539 Thank you. 228 00:18:44,583 --> 00:18:46,251 I'll walk her to her car. 229 00:19:06,772 --> 00:19:07,940 I'm staying the night. 230 00:19:09,274 --> 00:19:10,275 Thank you. 231 00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:18,700 Who was that boy with Josh? 232 00:19:20,744 --> 00:19:22,246 Was he cheating on Micah? 233 00:19:24,373 --> 00:19:25,541 It's not like him. 234 00:19:25,624 --> 00:19:27,876 If he didn't love her anymore, he'd just leave. 235 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,294 You don't know that, baby. 236 00:19:29,378 --> 00:19:30,420 I know my friends. 237 00:19:30,504 --> 00:19:34,383 We know what our friends want us to know about their marriages, 238 00:19:34,466 --> 00:19:35,551 and that's all. 239 00:19:36,426 --> 00:19:37,427 Ingram. 240 00:19:45,269 --> 00:19:46,436 Thanks. 241 00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:17,885 People have been coming on my property all night. 242 00:20:17,968 --> 00:20:20,262 I don't want them multiplying like roaches. 243 00:20:20,345 --> 00:20:22,848 Can you do anything about it? 244 00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:24,725 Micah's had issues in the past with a stalker. 245 00:20:24,808 --> 00:20:26,560 Wait, what? Since when? 246 00:20:26,643 --> 00:20:28,061 No. It's nothing. 247 00:20:29,479 --> 00:20:33,400 It's just a sad woman who identified too much with my books. 248 00:20:33,483 --> 00:20:35,152 She's not the only one. 249 00:20:35,736 --> 00:20:37,446 And you are? 250 00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:39,656 Ramon. Micah's assistant. 251 00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,200 -Anything else? -No. 252 00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:43,952 No. 253 00:20:44,536 --> 00:20:47,039 My fans, they can-- they can be intense, 254 00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:49,166 but I-- I couldn't imagine... 255 00:20:50,918 --> 00:20:54,129 Okay. There's nothing we can do about the road beyond the gate. 256 00:20:54,213 --> 00:20:55,964 It's public property. 257 00:20:56,048 --> 00:20:58,634 But we'll go ahead and leave a car out front for the next 48 hours. 258 00:20:58,717 --> 00:21:01,136 -Okay. Thank you very much. -Yeah. 259 00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:10,062 Look. 260 00:21:12,105 --> 00:21:13,315 You need private security. 261 00:21:15,651 --> 00:21:17,986 I don't want any more strangers around me. 262 00:21:19,905 --> 00:21:21,031 He's not a stranger. 263 00:21:41,718 --> 00:21:42,970 What can I do for you gentlemen? 264 00:21:43,637 --> 00:21:45,013 Let me see some ID. 265 00:21:47,224 --> 00:21:48,851 Listen, my name is Markus Killebrew. 266 00:21:48,934 --> 00:21:51,979 I was OPD up until about three years ago. Area five. 267 00:21:54,648 --> 00:21:56,650 Don't make me repeat myself, son. 268 00:21:57,776 --> 00:21:59,194 Let me see some ID. 269 00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:01,071 Son? 270 00:22:02,614 --> 00:22:03,782 Hey, what's going on? 271 00:22:04,575 --> 00:22:06,785 Look at me. Babe. Baby. 272 00:22:06,869 --> 00:22:08,495 Baby, look-- look at me. Look at me. 273 00:22:08,579 --> 00:22:10,414 Don't you give them a reason. You stay right here with me. 274 00:22:10,497 --> 00:22:12,875 Trini's already on the phone with Yates, all right? 275 00:22:12,958 --> 00:22:14,418 My name is Zarina Killebrew. 276 00:22:14,501 --> 00:22:18,964 I'm a neonatal nurse at Alta Bates, and this is my husband, Markus Killebrew. 277 00:22:19,590 --> 00:22:21,049 He was OPD for 12 years. 278 00:22:21,133 --> 00:22:23,594 Currently, owner of a private security firm. 279 00:22:23,677 --> 00:22:25,345 And this is our home. 280 00:22:26,054 --> 00:22:29,600 Our daughter is inside filming this interaction, 281 00:22:29,683 --> 00:22:33,478 and she's also on the phone with our neighbor, Detective Yates. 282 00:22:50,162 --> 00:22:54,499 Why do we have to give these motherfuckers everything but a blood sample 283 00:22:54,583 --> 00:22:57,336 before they recognize that I'm a goddamn man, huh? 284 00:22:58,337 --> 00:23:02,007 See, this is what I'm talking about. They done fucked off my whole mood. 285 00:23:02,090 --> 00:23:03,717 Come on. Come on. 286 00:23:10,349 --> 00:23:13,435 -I'm good. All right? Yeah. -Yeah? Yeah? 287 00:23:14,394 --> 00:23:16,355 So, don't you have a shift to go to? 288 00:23:17,606 --> 00:23:18,690 Huh? 289 00:23:18,774 --> 00:23:20,275 Well, you better get going. 290 00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,611 Because I'm cool. Really. 291 00:23:22,694 --> 00:23:23,695 You sure? 292 00:23:23,779 --> 00:23:26,073 Look, it ain't like I'm not used to this. 293 00:23:26,156 --> 00:23:27,699 You've seen it all before. 294 00:23:29,117 --> 00:23:30,911 You know I love you. 295 00:23:30,994 --> 00:23:33,330 I love your ass too. Come here. 296 00:23:40,003 --> 00:23:41,505 Now go on and save some lives. 297 00:23:43,715 --> 00:23:45,300 -Bye, baby. -Bye. 298 00:23:45,884 --> 00:23:47,052 I'll see you later. 299 00:23:47,135 --> 00:23:48,220 Drive safe. 300 00:24:21,712 --> 00:24:24,214 -So, you'll stay here with her? -Where else would I be? 301 00:24:24,298 --> 00:24:26,091 I have personal business, or I wouldn't leave. 302 00:24:26,175 --> 00:24:27,384 No need to explain. 303 00:24:29,219 --> 00:24:32,472 You don't seem overly concerned about Josh's death. 304 00:24:32,556 --> 00:24:33,807 I couldn't stand him. 305 00:24:35,309 --> 00:24:36,727 So, why are you here? 306 00:24:37,936 --> 00:24:40,522 I travel the world. I make a ton of money, 307 00:24:40,606 --> 00:24:42,691 and I have an apartment provided by Shelter. 308 00:24:42,774 --> 00:24:44,067 In Nob Hill. 309 00:24:44,693 --> 00:24:46,904 That's like asking me why I need water and air. 310 00:24:52,576 --> 00:24:55,913 Our daughter is inside filming this interaction, 311 00:24:55,996 --> 00:24:59,583 and she's also on the phone with our neighbor, Detective Yates. 312 00:25:00,584 --> 00:25:02,419 Hey, do you ever miss being police? 313 00:25:02,503 --> 00:25:05,339 Yeah. Especially when shit like that happens. 314 00:25:06,048 --> 00:25:09,718 Did it ever bother you to arrest Black people? 315 00:25:10,302 --> 00:25:11,845 Yeah, all the time. 316 00:25:13,847 --> 00:25:15,432 No, wait, that's... 317 00:25:16,642 --> 00:25:17,976 That's not entirely true. 318 00:25:18,060 --> 00:25:20,270 You know, I didn't have a problem arresting people 319 00:25:20,354 --> 00:25:21,939 who deserved to be locked up. 320 00:25:22,564 --> 00:25:25,567 In my mind, a criminal is a criminal. That's it. 321 00:25:30,572 --> 00:25:31,907 Did you ever see people you knew? 322 00:25:32,658 --> 00:25:34,409 Yeah, way too many times. 323 00:25:34,493 --> 00:25:36,745 I grew up with a lot of knuckleheads. 324 00:25:38,872 --> 00:25:41,375 So, is that why you left the force? 325 00:25:43,710 --> 00:25:44,920 Well... 326 00:25:46,088 --> 00:25:50,008 Why I left the force is... complicated. 327 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,054 Did you know the officers that were pimping those girls? 328 00:25:55,055 --> 00:25:56,265 You know about that? 329 00:26:02,145 --> 00:26:05,274 No. I didn't, but let me tell you something. 330 00:26:05,357 --> 00:26:06,567 Those men, 331 00:26:07,317 --> 00:26:10,487 they don't deserve to call themselves police. 332 00:26:10,571 --> 00:26:13,657 Or men, for that matter. Hear what I'm saying? 333 00:26:14,324 --> 00:26:17,744 -Yeah. -They're just basic criminals and thugs. 334 00:26:17,828 --> 00:26:18,829 That's all. 335 00:26:19,621 --> 00:26:20,622 Somebody's here. 336 00:26:34,595 --> 00:26:35,679 It's been a long time. 337 00:26:37,222 --> 00:26:40,225 Since I left you without a dope beat to step to. 338 00:26:42,811 --> 00:26:44,104 How you doing, Markus? 339 00:26:44,188 --> 00:26:45,314 I'm good, Pops. 340 00:26:47,107 --> 00:26:49,818 This is my daughter. Trini. 341 00:26:50,360 --> 00:26:53,322 Trini, this is Poppy Parnell. 342 00:26:54,823 --> 00:26:56,116 Nice to meet you, Trini. 343 00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:57,743 Yeah, it's nice to meet you too, Miss Parnell. 344 00:26:57,826 --> 00:27:00,746 Hey, you helped my father get that man out of jail, right? 345 00:27:03,832 --> 00:27:06,251 I helped your father. 346 00:27:08,086 --> 00:27:10,672 Yes. Yes, I did. 347 00:27:10,756 --> 00:27:12,007 I did. 348 00:27:14,426 --> 00:27:18,305 Hey, sweetheart, could you, I don't know, get us something to drink? 349 00:27:18,388 --> 00:27:20,057 -Yeah, of course. Be right back. -Thank you. 350 00:27:24,895 --> 00:27:26,021 What can I do for you? 351 00:27:28,524 --> 00:27:30,234 You know about the Joshua Keith murder. 352 00:27:31,151 --> 00:27:33,946 -Shit, here we go. -No, not like that. 353 00:27:34,821 --> 00:27:37,407 You remember Mikey from when we were kids? 354 00:27:40,869 --> 00:27:42,663 Yeah, you're talking about that... 355 00:27:43,372 --> 00:27:46,458 that grimy little white girl who used to hang around Bushrod Park. 356 00:27:47,334 --> 00:27:49,294 Joshua was her husband. 357 00:27:51,630 --> 00:27:55,133 And I know you have a private security firm now. 358 00:27:55,217 --> 00:27:57,427 -Desiree-- -Desiree told you. You're right. 359 00:27:59,847 --> 00:28:03,058 I just want someone around her that can be trusted. 360 00:28:08,063 --> 00:28:09,690 Don't look at me like that. 361 00:28:28,834 --> 00:28:30,294 Your very own inner sanctum. 362 00:28:31,044 --> 00:28:34,006 Devon with security will be by shortly to give you access to everything. 363 00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:36,550 -Cool. -Any questions? 364 00:28:38,010 --> 00:28:41,013 Yeah. What exactly is Shelter? 365 00:28:42,181 --> 00:28:44,141 A women's lifestyle brand and company. 366 00:28:44,224 --> 00:28:46,268 Fans think we're about women's actualization. 367 00:28:46,351 --> 00:28:49,771 Seminars, workshops, therapy, wellness products. 368 00:28:50,731 --> 00:28:51,732 And haters? 369 00:28:51,815 --> 00:28:53,525 Haters think we're a coven. 370 00:28:56,695 --> 00:28:58,155 This is for you. 371 00:28:58,238 --> 00:29:00,616 -All right. -A mourning band for Josh. 372 00:29:00,699 --> 00:29:02,367 We sell them online. 373 00:29:02,451 --> 00:29:04,620 Micah believes it's a ritual that should have never gone away. 374 00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:06,121 It both honors the dead 375 00:29:06,205 --> 00:29:08,290 and forces the world to treat you with grace. 376 00:29:09,291 --> 00:29:10,834 Let me ask you a question. 377 00:29:10,918 --> 00:29:14,087 Was Josh close to the people, 378 00:29:14,171 --> 00:29:16,465 or as you would say, "guests" that work here? 379 00:29:16,548 --> 00:29:17,799 Sometimes. 380 00:29:18,342 --> 00:29:21,803 When he wanted to make use of our amenities. Or the assistants. 381 00:29:22,387 --> 00:29:24,973 My extension is 1637 if you need anything from me. 382 00:29:34,107 --> 00:29:35,359 -Hey. -Hey. 383 00:29:36,485 --> 00:29:39,488 You know, we don't have to do this today. I know you're dealing with Micah. 384 00:29:41,156 --> 00:29:43,158 Sorry about Joshua. He was a good man. 385 00:29:43,742 --> 00:29:45,077 How's she holding up? 386 00:29:45,827 --> 00:29:46,828 Terribly. 387 00:29:47,829 --> 00:29:50,624 I would've skipped the appointment, but I pulled every string I could 388 00:29:50,707 --> 00:29:54,253 to get you into this clinical trial, and we certainly can't miss the first day. 389 00:30:18,026 --> 00:30:19,069 I'm scared. 390 00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:24,491 I know, Daddy. 391 00:30:28,662 --> 00:30:31,123 We have to tell Lillian and the girls. 392 00:30:31,874 --> 00:30:35,002 You need the support, and we all need to be able to help you. 393 00:30:35,085 --> 00:30:36,211 -No. -Daddy. 394 00:30:36,295 --> 00:30:37,504 I said no. 395 00:30:37,588 --> 00:30:39,590 Well, how do you think you're gonna be able to keep it from 'em? 396 00:30:39,673 --> 00:30:40,966 Especially Lillian? 397 00:30:42,217 --> 00:30:44,970 The second I tell her, I'll become an old man to her. 398 00:30:45,762 --> 00:30:49,016 I'm not ready for her to look at me like I'm losing my mind. 399 00:30:50,184 --> 00:30:51,185 Daddy. 400 00:30:51,768 --> 00:30:54,104 I have a beautiful young wife. 401 00:30:54,980 --> 00:30:57,608 I am not gonna be ridiculous to her. 402 00:30:57,691 --> 00:30:59,067 What does that mean? 403 00:30:59,151 --> 00:31:01,653 It means what it means. 404 00:31:02,654 --> 00:31:03,989 My terms. 405 00:31:07,242 --> 00:31:08,994 I don't even wanna hear it. 406 00:31:09,077 --> 00:31:11,288 -We're Catholic. -And I'm a criminal. 407 00:31:13,415 --> 00:31:15,334 A man can be a contradiction. 408 00:31:17,711 --> 00:31:19,755 Lukather Shreveport Scoville? 409 00:31:33,727 --> 00:31:34,853 Right this way. 410 00:31:43,278 --> 00:31:45,948 So, we don't tell her about all of this, 411 00:31:46,031 --> 00:31:48,575 but maybe you could find something useful. 412 00:31:49,785 --> 00:31:51,036 What is it? 413 00:31:51,119 --> 00:31:52,496 Hate mail. 414 00:31:54,206 --> 00:31:55,624 Addressed to Micah. 415 00:31:57,918 --> 00:31:59,086 Black Jesus. 416 00:32:03,924 --> 00:32:04,925 Wow. 417 00:32:08,136 --> 00:32:09,221 Just don't hug me. 418 00:32:12,015 --> 00:32:14,393 And don't speak to me in a soft voice. 419 00:32:15,477 --> 00:32:17,020 I'll just shatter if you do. 420 00:32:19,314 --> 00:32:21,108 I'm here for whatever you need. 421 00:32:21,191 --> 00:32:23,360 How am I supposed to face everybody? 422 00:32:24,111 --> 00:32:26,071 Don't worry about that. 423 00:32:26,154 --> 00:32:28,574 Just step by step until we know. 424 00:32:28,657 --> 00:32:32,244 Know what? That my husband died in the arms of another man? 425 00:32:33,662 --> 00:32:35,998 I mean, I'm sad, and then I'm humiliated. 426 00:32:36,623 --> 00:32:39,209 I'm sad, and then I'm furious. 427 00:32:39,293 --> 00:32:41,211 What kind of fool have I been? 428 00:32:48,302 --> 00:32:50,095 Did the police contact you today? 429 00:32:50,179 --> 00:32:53,348 Ingram told me not to talk with them unless I had a lawyer. 430 00:32:55,767 --> 00:32:58,103 So I'm meeting with a couple this afternoon. 431 00:33:00,522 --> 00:33:03,525 Poppy, what did Joshua want to talk to you about? 432 00:33:06,570 --> 00:33:08,363 I mean, did he say anything? 433 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:14,244 What? 434 00:33:14,995 --> 00:33:17,497 -We'll talk about it later. -Don't treat me like glass, Poppy. 435 00:33:18,248 --> 00:33:19,875 I swear to God. 436 00:33:19,958 --> 00:33:23,128 Why didn't he show up at dinner? Were you guys fighting? 437 00:33:24,046 --> 00:33:25,506 I mean, just... 438 00:33:26,507 --> 00:33:31,178 Just-- Just marriage sniping. Nothing major. 439 00:33:31,261 --> 00:33:33,305 He was dealing with the fallout of his doc. 440 00:33:33,847 --> 00:33:36,350 I was focused on the launch. 441 00:33:36,433 --> 00:33:37,643 We were busy. 442 00:33:37,726 --> 00:33:38,894 Ramon! 443 00:33:43,774 --> 00:33:45,317 Get rid of that phone. 444 00:33:46,151 --> 00:33:47,361 Of course. 445 00:33:48,070 --> 00:33:49,613 I canceled the rest of your week. 446 00:33:49,696 --> 00:33:51,573 Lachlan gave me some pushback, but I handled it. 447 00:33:51,657 --> 00:33:52,658 Okay. 448 00:34:32,447 --> 00:34:34,283 You have to let yourself grieve. 449 00:34:39,913 --> 00:34:42,040 It's what I tell my girls at the seminar, but... 450 00:34:45,168 --> 00:34:47,670 Right now, it means nothing to me. Absolutely nothing. 451 00:34:54,303 --> 00:34:56,054 All I feel is insane. 452 00:35:08,650 --> 00:35:11,403 Poppy, I need you to help me find out what happened to Joshua. 453 00:35:12,362 --> 00:35:15,282 -You just need to get some rest. -No. Listen. 454 00:35:15,365 --> 00:35:17,743 When I was in the back of that ambulance, 455 00:35:17,826 --> 00:35:21,038 the officers were joking that rent boys in the Castro were... 456 00:35:29,046 --> 00:35:30,047 Like... 457 00:35:31,215 --> 00:35:33,008 Like, playing Russian roulette. 458 00:35:36,303 --> 00:35:39,097 We cannot depend on them to tell us the truth. 459 00:35:42,893 --> 00:35:45,771 I put myself in a lot of danger last year. 460 00:35:47,814 --> 00:35:51,485 Ingram, my father too, and you know what happened with Cydie. 461 00:35:53,362 --> 00:35:54,988 Joshua would do it if it were you. 462 00:35:55,072 --> 00:35:56,573 It's not that simple. 463 00:35:57,241 --> 00:35:58,992 Poppy, please. 464 00:36:00,118 --> 00:36:01,119 Please. 465 00:36:01,203 --> 00:36:06,041 Seeking answers is never a straight line. 466 00:36:07,709 --> 00:36:10,420 I won't only find out what you want me to know. 467 00:36:10,921 --> 00:36:13,340 -I don't care about that. -But I do. 468 00:36:14,967 --> 00:36:16,426 I do. I-I-I... 469 00:36:19,137 --> 00:36:24,726 I will help you by supporting you, but I-- I can't add to your pain. I... 470 00:36:28,438 --> 00:36:29,565 I'm gonna go lie down. 471 00:36:56,717 --> 00:36:58,218 Hey, you, what's going on? 472 00:36:58,302 --> 00:36:59,303 Hey. 473 00:37:00,304 --> 00:37:03,140 Micah asked me to look into Josh's murder. 474 00:37:08,103 --> 00:37:09,521 You sure you wanna do that? 475 00:37:09,605 --> 00:37:11,148 Well, I don't wanna hurt her. 476 00:37:12,316 --> 00:37:13,567 Real talk? 477 00:37:13,650 --> 00:37:16,987 Between this and Daddy, I don't have anything left. 478 00:37:19,531 --> 00:37:22,826 Well, I could look into it, just for peace of mind, 479 00:37:22,910 --> 00:37:25,746 and you could concentrate on being a friend. 480 00:37:27,289 --> 00:37:28,290 Okay. 481 00:37:29,333 --> 00:37:30,709 But look quietly. 482 00:37:31,251 --> 00:37:32,336 Okay. 483 00:37:57,069 --> 00:37:58,111 Hey. 484 00:37:58,195 --> 00:37:59,446 Talked to Micah? 485 00:37:59,947 --> 00:38:02,783 No. What's going on, Ingram? 486 00:38:02,866 --> 00:38:05,577 A friend of mine at SFPD gave me a heads-up. 487 00:38:05,661 --> 00:38:09,289 Police are closing the case, classifying it as a murder-suicide. 488 00:38:09,373 --> 00:38:11,375 Well, who do they think did the murdering? 489 00:38:11,458 --> 00:38:12,876 They think Joshua did it. 490 00:38:18,048 --> 00:38:19,049 Shit. 491 00:38:19,550 --> 00:38:21,385 Twelve phone calls? Really? 492 00:38:22,219 --> 00:38:23,720 Murder-suicide? 493 00:38:23,804 --> 00:38:26,181 If that's not the laziest shit I've ever heard. 494 00:38:26,265 --> 00:38:27,975 What could possibly be Josh's motive? 495 00:38:28,058 --> 00:38:31,687 Well, who's asking? Micah's over-involved friend or the nosy journalist? 496 00:38:31,770 --> 00:38:33,522 Is the answer different for one and not the other? 497 00:38:33,605 --> 00:38:34,773 Step light. 498 00:38:34,857 --> 00:38:36,108 I'll say the same to you. 499 00:38:36,191 --> 00:38:37,776 -I'm not the story. -Could be. 500 00:38:38,694 --> 00:38:41,780 -Now, what does that mean? -It means do your fucking job. 501 00:38:42,364 --> 00:38:43,407 And we're done. 502 00:38:45,033 --> 00:38:46,410 I'll give you one more chance. 503 00:38:46,493 --> 00:38:47,828 Or what? 504 00:38:47,911 --> 00:38:49,621 Or I'll investigate this. 505 00:38:49,705 --> 00:38:53,458 Then you and your whole department will come out looking like fools. 506 00:38:54,626 --> 00:38:57,713 You saw the same thing I did. You just don't wanna face it. 507 00:38:58,463 --> 00:39:01,300 He was shirtless in the arms of a much younger man. 508 00:39:01,383 --> 00:39:03,385 There's evidence that was not their first encounter. 509 00:39:03,468 --> 00:39:06,180 No forced entry, nothing missing. Should I go on? 510 00:39:06,263 --> 00:39:07,472 Yes, you should. 511 00:39:08,015 --> 00:39:09,516 What about Micah's stalker? 512 00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,643 What about all the hate mail in her office? 513 00:39:11,727 --> 00:39:14,938 What about the Sons of-- of-- of Ivar, or whatever the hell their name is? 514 00:39:15,022 --> 00:39:16,648 From what I've read, they're dangerous. 515 00:39:16,732 --> 00:39:18,192 Well, then you should wanna stay away. 516 00:39:18,275 --> 00:39:20,819 You don't want them turning their sights on you. 517 00:39:23,405 --> 00:39:25,616 If you know this, how can you rule them out? 518 00:39:26,575 --> 00:39:28,368 How the hell do you even keep your job? 519 00:39:32,789 --> 00:39:35,459 You know I trained under Owen Cave? 520 00:39:35,542 --> 00:39:36,710 So? 521 00:39:37,252 --> 00:39:40,130 -So you've ruined him. -He ruined himself. 522 00:39:40,714 --> 00:39:43,842 Poppy Parnell. Judge, jury, executioner, right? 523 00:39:44,593 --> 00:39:47,054 Whoever you're gunning to destroy this time, it won't be me. 524 00:39:47,137 --> 00:39:50,307 You'll destroy yourself if you don't dig a little deeper. 525 00:41:03,505 --> 00:41:04,548 Hey. 526 00:41:05,716 --> 00:41:06,884 They closed the case. 527 00:41:08,594 --> 00:41:09,678 I know. 528 00:41:16,018 --> 00:41:17,102 Where are you? 529 00:41:19,605 --> 00:41:21,565 Just my old stomping grounds. 530 00:41:23,609 --> 00:41:26,111 That's not the answer. You know that. 531 00:41:27,112 --> 00:41:31,658 What did my daddy say to you? "You can always come to us." 532 00:41:31,742 --> 00:41:34,369 Come to me, honey. Just come to me. 533 00:42:24,419 --> 00:42:25,629 You need anything? 534 00:42:27,047 --> 00:42:30,050 No, I'm just doing the work. 535 00:42:30,676 --> 00:42:31,844 Affirmations. 536 00:42:34,346 --> 00:42:35,806 How about taking a little break? 537 00:42:37,891 --> 00:42:40,060 Grief doesn't settle. Neither should we. 538 00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:47,442 Now, look... 539 00:42:49,152 --> 00:42:51,363 You know you don't have to do that with me. 540 00:43:04,126 --> 00:43:06,044 Hey, it's Joshua, leave a message. 541 00:43:06,128 --> 00:43:08,755 And if it's you, honey, send me a text. 542 00:43:08,839 --> 00:43:10,591 You know I don't listen to these things. 543 00:43:16,763 --> 00:43:18,182 Come with me. 544 00:43:28,817 --> 00:43:30,068 You're safe here. 545 00:43:33,071 --> 00:43:34,740 Take as long as you need. 546 00:43:41,246 --> 00:43:42,664 Will you pray with me? 547 00:45:15,174 --> 00:45:16,425 Hey. 548 00:45:23,849 --> 00:45:25,392 I... 549 00:45:26,852 --> 00:45:28,812 Gonna do the podcast about Josh. 550 00:45:29,730 --> 00:45:33,317 But we have to be honest with each other. You have to be honest with me. 551 00:45:34,902 --> 00:45:38,155 -Okay. -The risk is too high if we're not. 552 00:45:40,991 --> 00:45:42,159 But you were right. 553 00:45:43,785 --> 00:45:45,787 Josh would've risked it all for me. 554 00:45:48,916 --> 00:45:50,584 You save me once again. 555 00:45:52,711 --> 00:45:55,255 No. We save each other. 556 00:45:56,798 --> 00:45:58,842 We have to do it publicly. 557 00:45:58,926 --> 00:46:00,260 On the podcast. 558 00:46:00,344 --> 00:46:02,679 Force the police to look deeper into the case. 559 00:46:06,099 --> 00:46:07,100 Okay? 560 00:46:08,393 --> 00:46:09,520 Okay. 561 00:46:12,856 --> 00:46:14,066 Thank you. 562 00:46:14,650 --> 00:46:15,817 Get some rest. 563 00:46:32,835 --> 00:46:35,754 "Other people's tears are only water." 564 00:46:37,506 --> 00:46:42,094 My friend, Joshua Keith, said that to me the night he died. 565 00:46:42,970 --> 00:46:46,014 I didn't know what he meant. Why he said it. 566 00:46:47,766 --> 00:46:52,563 But now it feels as if he's... speaking to me from the grave. 567 00:46:54,857 --> 00:46:57,526 Today, when I heard that the case was closed, 568 00:46:57,609 --> 00:47:01,613 that his widow would never have the answer she deserved, 569 00:47:03,282 --> 00:47:05,075 his words became prophetic. 570 00:47:06,910 --> 00:47:11,415 To the people who didn't know him, Josh's death is a story. 571 00:47:12,082 --> 00:47:13,792 A headline. 572 00:47:14,918 --> 00:47:16,295 A case file number. 573 00:47:17,796 --> 00:47:20,007 But for those of us who loved him, 574 00:47:20,883 --> 00:47:22,801 it's a heartbreaking loss. 575 00:47:24,136 --> 00:47:27,264 A loss that deserves answers. 576 00:47:30,684 --> 00:47:33,312 Joshua wasn't religious. 577 00:47:33,395 --> 00:47:36,815 Not in the churchgoing sense of the word, but he was... 578 00:47:37,858 --> 00:47:39,193 He was spiritual. 579 00:47:40,194 --> 00:47:45,157 A man of the world that made curiosity his lodestar. 580 00:47:48,327 --> 00:47:50,829 As young cubs at The New York Times, 581 00:47:51,371 --> 00:47:56,251 he was endlessly amused by my devotion to Sunday mass. 582 00:47:57,544 --> 00:47:59,171 It tickled him, and... 583 00:47:59,922 --> 00:48:02,299 until I explained it the way I felt it. 584 00:48:03,842 --> 00:48:07,930 And it came from a blessing I heard at my first communion. 585 00:48:09,890 --> 00:48:12,684 "Teach your children scriptures early 586 00:48:12,768 --> 00:48:16,855 and they'll be able to access armor they didn't even know they had." 587 00:48:18,857 --> 00:48:20,150 That was one of mine. 588 00:48:22,277 --> 00:48:23,570 The other, we shared. 589 00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:29,243 It was the tether of our 20-year friendship. 590 00:48:32,371 --> 00:48:36,667 What tethered us together was the pursuit of truth. 591 00:48:38,710 --> 00:48:41,713 I will continue that pursuit on his path, 592 00:48:41,797 --> 00:48:45,843 and I will not give up until I have all the answers. 593 00:48:48,720 --> 00:48:52,558 The truth will be the light that shines us through. 594 00:48:56,770 --> 00:48:59,523 So... here we go. 595 00:49:04,820 --> 00:49:08,657 Once again, my name is Poppy Parnell. 596 00:49:11,410 --> 00:49:15,539 And I'd like you to reconsider.