1 00:00:01,042 --> 00:00:03,628 So, yeah, the first 10 years of my life, 2 00:00:03,712 --> 00:00:05,922 I called it a "teethbrush," but in my defense, 3 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,924 you brush your teeth, not your tooth! 4 00:00:09,217 --> 00:00:10,260 Hey, you guys even listening to me? 5 00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:12,429 We most definitely are not. 6 00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:15,515 Uh, sorry, Miggy. I realized I forgot my floss again. 7 00:00:15,598 --> 00:00:16,683 You carry floss around with you? 8 00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:18,059 Like in the container or loose? 9 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:19,728 Container, Miggy. 10 00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,479 It's for my overnight bag for Douglas'. 11 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:22,689 I'm always packing and repacking it. 12 00:00:22,772 --> 00:00:24,149 Forgetting things. 13 00:00:24,232 --> 00:00:26,818 Spent a whole day without a bra once. 14 00:00:26,901 --> 00:00:29,237 Felt unhinged. And a little sexy. 15 00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:31,072 Hey, doesn't Douglas ever sleep at your house? 16 00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:32,365 Never. My place is more comfortable. 17 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,867 We're happier there. 18 00:00:33,950 --> 00:00:36,119 Excuse me? I don't remember you asking me how I felt about it. 19 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,372 My sheets are hand-loomed in the fjords of Norway. 20 00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:40,832 They only make two sets a year. 21 00:00:40,915 --> 00:00:42,417 I just thought it was safe to assume. 22 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:43,835 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Guys! 23 00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:45,211 Stop fighting! 24 00:00:45,295 --> 00:00:47,505 We're not fighting. We're just having a playful back-and-forth. 25 00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:49,007 Okay, I'll fix this. 26 00:00:49,090 --> 00:00:51,801 Douglas, tonight, you have to spend the night at Poppy's. 27 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,637 Don't bother, Miggy. Douglas is stuck in his ways. 28 00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,139 Hey, I take issue with that. 29 00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:59,309 You know, in 1972, I camped out for three nights 30 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,895 on a Buffalo sidewalk just to get Sabre tickets? 31 00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:04,230 We had to huddle together for warmth. 32 00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:07,192 But with close proximity comes disease. 33 00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:10,111 Gregory... 34 00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:12,906 Oh, anyway, listen, Poppy, if you want, 35 00:01:12,989 --> 00:01:14,240 I'll, uh -- I'll spend the night at your place. 36 00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:15,366 Aww! 37 00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:17,243 Wait, should we talk about Gregory? 'Cause... 38 00:01:17,327 --> 00:01:18,453 You know what? Forget it. 39 00:01:18,536 --> 00:01:20,455 Turn your head, Miggy. I'm gonna kiss this man. 40 00:01:20,538 --> 00:01:21,539 - Bring it in. - Mm-hmm. 41 00:01:21,623 --> 00:01:22,624 - Mwah! - Aww. 42 00:01:22,707 --> 00:01:24,751 Get ready for the best night of your life. 43 00:01:26,669 --> 00:01:28,254 - Hey. - Damn you. 44 00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:30,882 Last night was the worst night of my life! 45 00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:33,384 High five, my man. Nowhere to go but up! 46 00:01:38,473 --> 00:01:39,766 Gregory. 47 00:01:40,975 --> 00:01:42,435 {\an8}It smells weird in here. 48 00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:43,645 {\an8}It's probably Graham's lunch. 49 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:46,564 {\an8}Yeah, we only had eggs, so I boiled six, called it a day. 50 00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:48,483 {\an8}Oh, hey, Colin. 51 00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,567 {\an8}-Oh, hi, Angie. 52 00:01:50,151 --> 00:01:51,152 {\an8}How's it going? 53 00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:52,237 {\an8}Oh, you know, 54 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,114 {\an8}pretty bog-standard day so far. 55 00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:55,448 {\an8}Yeah. 56 00:01:57,158 --> 00:01:59,119 {\an8}That's...good. 57 00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:00,870 {\an8} 58 00:02:02,831 --> 00:02:04,207 {\an8}Well, uh, yeah, cheers. 59 00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:06,209 {\an8}- Hee-hee. Yeah. 60 00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:09,212 {\an8}What in Cupid's tiny grave just happened? 61 00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,881 {\an8}I have goose bumps and obviously not the good kind. 62 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:14,759 {\an8}Things with Colin and me kind of cooled down since Valentine's Day. 63 00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,136 {\an8}Really? Why? 64 00:02:16,219 --> 00:02:17,929 {\an8}I thought you guys shared some heat on the swing set. 65 00:02:18,012 --> 00:02:19,848 {\an8}You were all 66 00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,224 {\an8}Okay, what did I tell you about fist pumping? No. 67 00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:22,308 {\an8}- Right. And, yeah, 68 00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:23,393 {\an8}we did have heat, all right? 69 00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:25,645 {\an8}So much that it was probably inappropriate on school property. 70 00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:28,439 {\an8}- But nothing has happened since. Ohh. 71 00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:31,109 {\an8}Do you think maybe he just sees you as a mom from class? 72 00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:32,861 {\an8} A mom from class?! 73 00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,445 {\an8}Excuse me? 74 00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:37,866 {\an8}Uh, sir, I invite you to check out the merchandise. 75 00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:39,659 {\an8}Not too much. 76 00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,161 {\an8}All I need to do is get Colin alone, 77 00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,871 {\an8}bust out my A-game, and he'll be powerless. 78 00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,081 {\an8}I just need an in. 79 00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:46,249 {\an8}-What about Sophie? 80 00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:48,710 {\an8}I mean, she's desk mates with Colin's kid. 81 00:02:48,793 --> 00:02:51,171 {\an8}Percy? I don't know if Sophie likes him very much. 82 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,506 {\an8}No one likes him. Kid's obsessed with apples. 83 00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:55,049 {\an8}-The way he talks about Fujis... 84 00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:57,135 {\an8}- ...is chilling. 85 00:02:57,218 --> 00:02:58,887 {\an8}God, I'd kill for a hobby. 86 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,471 {\an8}Anyway, thanks, kids. 87 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:01,764 {\an8}Beat it. 88 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,683 {\an8}Oh, my God. Will, that is perfect. 89 00:03:03,766 --> 00:03:06,019 {\an8}I'll just invite Colin over for a playdate tonight. 90 00:03:06,102 --> 00:03:07,562 {\an8}Can I borrow your daughter for bait? 91 00:03:07,645 --> 00:03:10,148 {\an8}Ho'd up. I thought we were taking Graham and Sophie for pizza tonight. 92 00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:11,983 {\an8}We've been planning this for awhile. 93 00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:14,319 {\an8}I have been micro-dosing LACTAID since Monday. 94 00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:15,862 {\an8}Sorry, bro, this is more important. 95 00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:17,989 {\an8}Here comes the apple man. 96 00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:21,451 {\an8}Why would you force me to sleep at Poppy's? 97 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,536 {\an8}My whole body is destroyed. Here, feel this. 98 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:24,954 {\an8}It's the L5. 99 00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,497 {\an8}Yikes. That disk wants out. 100 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:29,542 Yeah, the whole experience was a nightmare, from soup to nuts. 101 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:32,712 First of all, I couldn't have my usual nightcap 102 00:03:32,795 --> 00:03:35,173 because Poppy doesn't have any single-malt whiskey, 103 00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:36,674 so I had to drink red wine 104 00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,968 like a maître d' closing up for the night. 105 00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,013 Then I'm in her bathroom, which is the size of an Alfa Romeo. 106 00:03:42,096 --> 00:03:43,097 Not a reference I get. 107 00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:45,433 - It's a small car, Miggy. - If you say so. 108 00:03:45,516 --> 00:03:46,684 I go to brush my teeth, 109 00:03:46,768 --> 00:03:48,394 and there's nowhere to put the brush down 110 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:51,105 'cause of the hundreds of candles and trinkets 111 00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:53,775 and just the tops of so many things. 112 00:03:53,858 --> 00:03:57,779 So I put it on the back of the toilet like a gigolo in a Denny's bathroom. 113 00:03:57,862 --> 00:04:01,282 Then the clock strikes 8:45, so I gotta make. 114 00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:02,367 Make what? 115 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,910 Make peace with my dinner. 116 00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,328 Still don't get it. 117 00:04:05,411 --> 00:04:06,537 Dookie, Miggy! 118 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:07,747 - Oh. - Drop anchor! 119 00:04:07,830 --> 00:04:09,832 Release the hounds! Come on! 120 00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,210 But the problem is the toilet is just 6 inches 121 00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:13,586 from her bedroom... 122 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,880 ...separated by a wall the width of a grape nut. 123 00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,507 So the chickens can't come home to roost, 124 00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:18,633 if you know what I mean. 125 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:20,260 You know I've never seen a chicken in real life? 126 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:23,513 So, I'm blocked like a stalled cement truck 127 00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:24,931 and just want to relax, 128 00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:27,684 but Poppy's watching Frasier, full volume. 129 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:30,728 You know what Roz's voice sounds like with a subwoofer? 130 00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:32,522 She was laughing like it's brand-new. 131 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:35,024 Roz, you tell it like it is! 132 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,402 And she keeps it on while she falls asleep. 133 00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,904 But here's the worst part -- the bed! 134 00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:43,866 That mattress came after me like I had done something to its family. 135 00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:45,785 Wow. Some night. 136 00:04:45,868 --> 00:04:48,830 I hate to see a tall, rich white man suffer like that. 137 00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:50,248 So, what are you gonna do? 138 00:04:50,331 --> 00:04:52,583 I-I don't know what I'm gonna do, but I-I can't say anything, 139 00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:54,377 'cause I don't want to hurt her feelings. 140 00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:56,879 Hey! 141 00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:58,423 I thought I heard you clomping around up here. 142 00:04:58,506 --> 00:05:00,174 Either that, or Miggy bought a pony. 143 00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:02,468 Hey. 144 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,471 Anyway, I just wanted to say last night was amazing, 145 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:06,889 and it just -- 146 00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:08,349 it means so much to me that you stayed over. 147 00:05:08,766 --> 00:05:11,436 You know, it's funny -- I was just telling Miggy how much I loved it. 148 00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:13,438 Oh. 149 00:05:13,521 --> 00:05:14,939 Oh, he was! He was. 150 00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:17,108 I was like, "Did you love it?" And he was like, "Yes." 151 00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:19,694 And I was like, "How much?" And he was like, "A lot." 152 00:05:19,777 --> 00:05:22,030 And I was like, "No, no, quantify it specifically." 153 00:05:22,113 --> 00:05:23,698 And he was like, "Five stars." 154 00:05:23,781 --> 00:05:25,783 And I was like, "Out of how many stars?" 155 00:05:25,867 --> 00:05:26,951 And then you walked in. 156 00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:28,870 Aww. 157 00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:30,663 In fact, he wants to do it again. 158 00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,498 - Really?! - Tonight! 159 00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:34,042 Ohhh! 160 00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,755 It would be my pleasure. 161 00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,298 Aww! 162 00:05:40,381 --> 00:05:41,382 Mm. 163 00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,595 - I would love it. - Thank you. 164 00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:49,682 Mmm! 165 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:51,809 Pizza, root beer, empty stage 166 00:05:51,893 --> 00:05:54,354 where the creepy animatronic gondoliers used to perform. 167 00:05:54,437 --> 00:05:55,605 This is what it's all about. 168 00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:57,440 We don't need your mom or my daughter. 169 00:05:57,523 --> 00:05:59,609 Yeah, we're better off without 'em. 170 00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:02,737 We got a fresh batch of plushies being loaded to the perfect height. 171 00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:05,907 I better go stop the plushie stuffer before he packs them in too tight. 172 00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:08,493 Hello, good sir. My name's Louis. 173 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:10,703 Don't call me "sir." It feels condescending. 174 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:11,996 Louis. Sorry. 175 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:15,500 Um, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind not packing the stuffies too tight. 176 00:06:15,583 --> 00:06:18,169 Listen, I have very little agency in this job, 177 00:06:18,252 --> 00:06:19,545 except when it comes to this machine. 178 00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:20,922 I stuff how I want. 179 00:06:21,005 --> 00:06:22,048 Okay. 180 00:06:22,131 --> 00:06:23,966 I totally support you all the way. 181 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,760 It's just, my friend and I, 182 00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:27,178 we're kind of having a guys' night. 183 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:31,391 We're looking forward to bro-ing out and clawin' us a stuffed gorilla or two. 184 00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:33,476 Looks like your bro's busy. 185 00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:35,144 Check this out. 186 00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:37,563 Gushers. Oops All Gush. 187 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:39,482 It's just the juice from the middle. 188 00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:42,068 Wouldn't the juice just get everywhere when you open the packet? 189 00:06:42,151 --> 00:06:43,778 Not if it came with a straw. 190 00:06:43,861 --> 00:06:45,738 - Ah. -Hey, buddy, machine's free. 191 00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,907 You ready to claw 'til we can't claw na mah? 192 00:06:48,866 --> 00:06:50,743 I'll handle this sad stranger. 193 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,287 Do you need help finding your family, sir? 194 00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:54,455 Are you pretending to... 195 00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:56,707 Oh. Wow. Okay. 196 00:06:56,791 --> 00:06:58,167 You know what? 197 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,128 I mistook you for a friend of mine. 198 00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:01,254 My apologies. 199 00:07:01,337 --> 00:07:03,256 I will be on my way. 200 00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:08,136 Wow, "sir" really is condescending. 201 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,221 Tell me honestly -- 202 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,224 do you think this shade makes me look too -- 203 00:07:13,307 --> 00:07:16,853 Ugh, how do I put this? -- friendly? 204 00:07:17,979 --> 00:07:20,022 You look like a hot cartoon mouse. 205 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,400 Oh. Thank you! 206 00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,068 Isn't this fun? 207 00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:27,613 Just us two gals getting me all dolled up for a date? 208 00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,490 Is it a date? Because last time I checked, 209 00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:32,285 9-year-olds weren't famous for making things spicy. 210 00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:33,494 This is Angie D'Amato you're talking to. 211 00:07:34,662 --> 00:07:36,622 You don't got to worry about spicy. 212 00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:38,583 We're really walking a line here, huh? 213 00:07:38,666 --> 00:07:41,627 Okay, look, I just need you to hang out with Percy for a couple hours 214 00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:44,505 while I have some alone time with his dad, all right? 215 00:07:45,673 --> 00:07:47,091 Bright smile, Sophie! 216 00:07:49,051 --> 00:07:50,219 Good day! 217 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,221 Come in. Come in. 218 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,723 Make yourself comfortable. 219 00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:55,475 Should we take off our shoes? 220 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:58,519 Oh, if you want to start that way 221 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,313 and see where the night takes us. 222 00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:02,815 I'm kidding. 223 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:04,275 Oh. 224 00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:07,987 Hi, Percy. 225 00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:09,322 Do you want to see my... 226 00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:11,949 - friend Graham's room? - Sure! 227 00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:13,201 Can we play Orchard? 228 00:08:15,703 --> 00:08:16,704 Maybe. 229 00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:20,708 Aw. 230 00:08:20,791 --> 00:08:22,293 Where is, uh -- Where is Graham? 231 00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:25,963 Oh, loving life. Somewhere. 232 00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:27,131 Ah. 233 00:08:27,882 --> 00:08:29,800 Uh, can I, uh, pour you some wine? 234 00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:33,012 Actually, would you mind if I just ran out and just took care of a few errands? 235 00:08:33,095 --> 00:08:34,138 Heh? 236 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,515 I don't know about you, 237 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,600 but we go through paper towels like crazy. 238 00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:41,020 I saw this lady on TV wring one out and then just keep using it. 239 00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:42,355 No one really does that, right? 240 00:08:42,438 --> 00:08:44,607 Yeah. Yeah! Pbht! 241 00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:45,900 Get out of here. 242 00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:47,693 I already got a man. 243 00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:48,778 Thanks so much. 244 00:08:48,861 --> 00:08:50,363 Listen, it's, uh -- it's just so nice 245 00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:52,615 to know another single parent who understands the juggle. 246 00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:53,699 Yeah. 247 00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:55,284 Anyway, give me a call if there's a problem. 248 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:56,369 Actually, I don't have your cell-- 249 00:08:57,995 --> 00:08:59,121 Fun. 250 00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,375 Looks like you're free to play Orchard with us. 251 00:09:03,334 --> 00:09:04,377 Pbht. 252 00:09:06,754 --> 00:09:09,090 Oops. You ate too many apple seeds, 253 00:09:09,173 --> 00:09:10,925 and now you have arsenic poisoning. 254 00:09:11,008 --> 00:09:12,677 Time to go to the apple hospital. 255 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:13,803 Again?! 256 00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:16,013 Why do we still have to play with this creepshow? 257 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:17,932 I can't go through another harvest. 258 00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:19,684 You already blew it with Colin. 259 00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:22,728 I did not. I just need more time, that's all. 260 00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:23,980 You just watch. 261 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:27,149 When he gets back, I'm gonna burn his face off with my spice. 262 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:29,443 No more hospital beds. You go rotten. 263 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:33,281 Hey! 264 00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:35,408 Thanks so much for watching Percy. 265 00:09:35,491 --> 00:09:36,701 I got so many errands done 266 00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:38,744 at your big American Target. 267 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:41,497 You know, now that I'm a single dad, 268 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,041 it's so hard to find the time to feed your child 269 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:48,004 and then go shopping for all the food that is required for the feeding. Aah! 270 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:50,339 They make cat feeders, why not kid feeders? 271 00:09:50,464 --> 00:09:51,465 Right? 272 00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:53,134 - Right, we'll be off. - Oh, really? 273 00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:54,218 Already? 274 00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:56,554 But Sophie and Percy are having so much fun. 275 00:09:56,637 --> 00:09:57,972 - Really? - Yeah. 276 00:09:58,598 --> 00:09:59,682 Apples. 277 00:10:00,516 --> 00:10:02,602 This is huge. I... 278 00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:05,479 Percy sometimes has trouble making friends because of the... 279 00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:07,481 - breakup. - The apple thing? Yeah. 280 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:08,899 That, um -- 281 00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:11,944 But, you know, if there's one person that can nerd out on a single topic, 282 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:13,863 - it is Sophie Cooper. - Okay. 283 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:16,741 Well, then shall we let this friendship bloom? 284 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:18,284 - Mm-hmm. - I'll stick around for a bit? 285 00:10:18,367 --> 00:10:20,494 Yeah, I'll get my lava lamp warmed up, 286 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,413 - we can take our shirts off. - Oh. 287 00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,497 I'm just kidding. 288 00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:25,416 I don't have a lava lamp. 289 00:10:28,919 --> 00:10:29,920 Mmm. 290 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,172 That is really good. 291 00:10:31,756 --> 00:10:33,716 That man's still staring at us. 292 00:10:34,258 --> 00:10:35,801 Should we call a grown-up? 293 00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,094 I got this. 294 00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:41,098 Dude, you're freaking out Taylor. 295 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,516 Oh, is that her name? 296 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:43,976 Yeah, I wasn't introduced. 297 00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,895 - Cut it out! - I will not cut it out. 298 00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,355 This was supposed to be our night! 299 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,482 Yeah, well, I had to see about a girl. 300 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:51,484 You wouldn't get it. 301 00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,319 Oh. I wouldn't get it? 302 00:10:53,402 --> 00:10:56,280 As a Good Will myself, I completely get it. 303 00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,032 I'm just surprised you would stoop this low 304 00:10:58,115 --> 00:10:59,575 just to break your dry spell. 305 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,577 - My dry spell? - Yeah, I said it. 306 00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,121 Last year at this time, you were on fire. 307 00:11:04,205 --> 00:11:06,749 Bunny Ears, Louisa, my daughter -- 308 00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:08,626 and from all the texts Lance sent me, 309 00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,252 sounds like you cleaned up at space camp. 310 00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:11,879 But so far, in second grade? 311 00:11:11,962 --> 00:11:13,381 Goose egg. 312 00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:16,258 Don't take it out on me because my mom has someone and you don't. 313 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:19,804 Meanwhile, your boy's having an older woman feed him mozzarelle. 314 00:11:19,887 --> 00:11:22,306 Ugh, Graham, we get it. You're Italian. 315 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:23,891 Like one-eighth of most of us! 316 00:11:23,974 --> 00:11:26,268 Esci da questo ristorante, meteorologo! 317 00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:29,939 That's Italian for "Leave this restaurant, weatherman!" 318 00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:31,482 Nothing would make me happier. 319 00:11:31,565 --> 00:11:32,566 But I can't. 320 00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:34,610 'Cause you're nine and that's not cool. 321 00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,070 Just go! 322 00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:39,115 Fine. 323 00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:41,951 You do you. I will go. 324 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:43,828 I'm gonna go. 325 00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:45,496 I'm gonna go. 326 00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:47,498 I'll just...go. 327 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:50,835 Watch me how I go. 328 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:03,597 All right. Round 2. 329 00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,015 Sleepy time. 330 00:12:05,099 --> 00:12:06,142 Sleepy, sleepy. 331 00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:07,435 This is a treat. 332 00:12:09,019 --> 00:12:10,020 Terrific. 333 00:12:14,483 --> 00:12:15,526 Okay, Douglas. 334 00:12:15,609 --> 00:12:16,944 - Uh-huh. - Can I tell you something? 335 00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:18,028 Anything. 336 00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:20,698 - I hate this so much. - What? 337 00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:22,783 - You hate this, too? - You in my bed 338 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:25,494 is like sleeping with Frankenstein being lightning-ed to life. 339 00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:27,538 Last night was awful. 340 00:12:27,621 --> 00:12:28,748 Floppy flop flop. 341 00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:30,207 Not even Frasier could soothe me. 342 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,042 Gregory. 343 00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:33,669 So, why didn't you say something? 344 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,421 Because it was progress. 345 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:38,382 You, you came into my world. You slept in my dumb bed. 346 00:12:38,466 --> 00:12:39,925 You were on my turf for once. 347 00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:41,594 Oh, I didn't know this was a turf thing. 348 00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:43,721 I-I just thought we were more comfortable at my house. 349 00:12:43,804 --> 00:12:46,724 Well, of course we are. You live in the house of a James Bond villain. 350 00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:49,310 And because of that, I'm always the one schlepping to you. 351 00:12:49,393 --> 00:12:51,520 Face it, Douglas, you call the shots. 352 00:12:52,688 --> 00:12:53,814 Oh, come on. 353 00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:55,065 If I decided things, 354 00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:57,193 our kids would be in boarding school 355 00:12:57,276 --> 00:12:58,402 and we'd be eating shrimp 356 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:01,030 at the tropical tax shelter of your choosing. 357 00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:03,574 I'm doing the best I can, Pops. 358 00:13:03,657 --> 00:13:06,202 I know, but this isn't gonna change. 359 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,121 And I just need to decide if I want to be with someone 360 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:10,498 whose world will always be 361 00:13:10,581 --> 00:13:11,832 a little more important than mine. 362 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:13,626 Oh, come on, that's not fair. 363 00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:16,212 I do my part. I-I babysit Rory. 364 00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:19,757 I pretend to keep an open mind in conversations 365 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,675 like the one we're having now. 366 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,886 Okay, we're both exhausted. 367 00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,304 Let's just say good night 368 00:13:25,387 --> 00:13:27,348 and sleep in our own damn beds, all right? 369 00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:29,308 I need to be alone. Well, alone with Frasier. 370 00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:30,392 You know what? 371 00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:31,894 Just for the record, everyone knows 372 00:13:31,977 --> 00:13:35,439 that this country has not made a great TV show since JAG. 373 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:36,690 What's JAG? 374 00:13:36,774 --> 00:13:38,108 Huh? Okay, you know what? 375 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:40,361 I can't talk to you when you're like this. 376 00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,530 Colin! 377 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:44,156 I'm parched! 378 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,533 Hurry! 379 00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:51,163 Oh. 380 00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:52,957 Gosh. 381 00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:55,459 You caught me dancing. 382 00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:58,879 Um, I'm not sure how I "caught" you doing anything, 383 00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:00,714 considering you just sent me to the kitchen 384 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:02,550 and then told me to hurry back. 385 00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:07,012 You know, I just realized that I never offered you a snack. 386 00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:08,180 Oh, no. 387 00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,140 Strawberries and chocolate? 388 00:14:10,224 --> 00:14:14,144 Normally, I like to use Strawberry Quik, 389 00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:18,607 but tonight I wanted to take my time. 390 00:14:25,614 --> 00:14:29,159 Uh, can I just say I'm feeling a bit strange about this? 391 00:14:29,243 --> 00:14:32,204 About eating chocolate on a pristine couch? 392 00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:35,165 We're bad, aren't we? 393 00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:38,002 Aw, you're wiping so much jam on that pillow. 394 00:14:38,085 --> 00:14:40,004 I'm sorry, I just have to clear the air. 395 00:14:40,087 --> 00:14:41,338 Are we on a date? 396 00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:43,424 'Cause, uh, I don't think that would be a good idea. 397 00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:45,175 Oh. W-What? 398 00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:47,887 No. Uh...a date? 399 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:50,931 You're hilarious. 400 00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:53,851 No, this is -- You thought this was a date? 401 00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:55,686 Well, oh, yeah, becau-- well, 'cause of the candles -- 402 00:14:55,769 --> 00:14:58,188 Oh, my eyes were strained from the big lights! 403 00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:00,274 And the seductive island rhythms -- 404 00:15:00,357 --> 00:15:01,358 I'll change it! 405 00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:02,943 Computer, play Puddle of Mudd. 406 00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:04,695 Puddle of Mudd not found. 407 00:15:04,778 --> 00:15:07,323 Okay, uh, well, sorry. I misunderstood. 408 00:15:07,406 --> 00:15:08,991 Yeah. 409 00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:12,620 Well, it is, uh -- it is getting late, so we should head out. 410 00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,788 Okay, yeah, sure. Of course. 411 00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:16,290 I'll go grab Percy. 412 00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:17,416 Okay. 413 00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:19,293 Drop-off playdate... 414 00:15:19,710 --> 00:15:20,878 successful. 415 00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:27,051 Jig is up. 416 00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:28,636 Playdate not successful. 417 00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:30,054 I guess your dad was right. 418 00:15:30,137 --> 00:15:31,722 I'm just a school mom with no spice. 419 00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:33,807 - But good news, we done. - Oh, no. 420 00:15:34,224 --> 00:15:36,185 - That's bad news. - How do you mean? 421 00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:37,645 I think I love Percy now. 422 00:15:37,728 --> 00:15:39,229 Something switched. 423 00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:41,732 Now all I want to do is talk about apples. 424 00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:43,275 - Forever. - What? 425 00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:46,236 Look, I am in a bad spot here, okay? 426 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:49,073 But if they leave right now, maybe I get out of this alive. 427 00:15:49,156 --> 00:15:50,574 Not gonna happen, babe. 428 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,618 - They stay, or else. - Or else what? 429 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,161 This is already a disaster. 430 00:15:54,244 --> 00:15:56,705 Or else I tell Colin this playdate was a trap 431 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:57,915 baited with children. 432 00:15:57,998 --> 00:16:01,085 Yeah, that's definitely the worst way you could say it, but... 433 00:16:01,168 --> 00:16:02,169 you wouldn't. 434 00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:04,672 Colin! Angie organized this whole thing 435 00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:07,341 so she could go on a date with you! Aah! 436 00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:10,469 Oh. 437 00:16:10,552 --> 00:16:11,845 She said it all, huh? 438 00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:13,222 Yeah. Sorry. 439 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:14,807 I realized in the air I was too late. 440 00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:19,812 So, um, how do you feel about oranges? 441 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:22,481 Hey, look, Colin. 442 00:16:23,273 --> 00:16:26,151 I'm sorry that everything I've done today 443 00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:31,073 has been crazy and legally actionable. 444 00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:33,575 Do you mean when you tackled the small child 445 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,452 to hide the fact that you like me? 446 00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:37,079 Is -- That is what happened? 447 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,873 That -- That d-- Yeah, I think -- Yeah, that's right. 448 00:16:40,749 --> 00:16:44,753 I guess I-I couldn't handle the fact that you just see me as a mom in a class. 449 00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:48,298 Angie, I-I do like you. 450 00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:52,219 You're beautiful and strange, 451 00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,847 and you say "butts" a lot -- 452 00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:56,140 Ha. 453 00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:58,017 Butts. 454 00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:00,644 But this single-parent thing is -- is new to me. 455 00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:02,187 I'm just trying to keep my head above water. 456 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:07,067 I-I don't know how I'm supposed to get Percy to school on time and date. 457 00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:09,361 I-It's just so overwhelming. 458 00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:10,446 How do you do it? 459 00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:12,448 Nine years of practice. 460 00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:14,199 And if today proves anything, 461 00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,826 it's that I-I haven't figured it out yet. 462 00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,872 But, yeah, you'll get there. 463 00:17:20,330 --> 00:17:21,498 I can help you. 464 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,088 - I'd like that. - Oh. 465 00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:39,558 Eventually, everyone buys the merch. 466 00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:40,684 Hmm? 467 00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:42,603 - Nothing. Ignore me. - Hmm. 468 00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:44,772 Mm. 469 00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:47,524 Kids. 470 00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:48,609 Oh, um... 471 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:15,803 - Hey. -Hey, Poppy. 472 00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:17,429 This is, uh, Douglas Fogerty. 473 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:18,514 I know. 474 00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:19,973 - Your name came up. -I know. 475 00:18:20,057 --> 00:18:21,892 I was just trying to be cute. 476 00:18:22,184 --> 00:18:23,310 It was a miss. 477 00:18:24,144 --> 00:18:25,604 - Can't sleep? -Nah. 478 00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:26,897 I just miss your face. 479 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,190 Mm. 480 00:18:28,273 --> 00:18:30,275 Hey, should we try that, uh, Face Phone thing? 481 00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:32,820 - Oh, FaceTime? -No, I don't think that's it. 482 00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:35,197 I want to say, uh, Face Guy. 483 00:18:36,156 --> 00:18:37,866 What... 484 00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,660 Okay, well, now it's screaming at me. What -- 485 00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:41,703 Okay, just hit "accept." Oh, you did it! 486 00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:42,871 There you are. 487 00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:44,456 You're so beautiful. 488 00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,792 Hey, do you think our boys and girls in Afghanistan 489 00:18:46,875 --> 00:18:48,085 know that they can use this 490 00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:50,212 to see their loved ones back home? 491 00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:52,089 I'm pretty sure they do, yeah. 492 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:53,465 That's good. 493 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,510 Listen, Poppy, I've been thinking. 494 00:18:57,511 --> 00:18:59,555 It's not about stuff 495 00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:02,891 or whose mattress is more comfortable. 496 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,102 {\an8}I just need you. 497 00:19:07,896 --> 00:19:09,356 How about I move in? 498 00:19:09,439 --> 00:19:10,607 Seriously? 499 00:19:10,691 --> 00:19:13,402 Uh, I mean, that's sweet but crazy. 500 00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:15,404 The tandem parking alone would kill you. 501 00:19:15,487 --> 00:19:16,947 Plus, where would the kids sleep? 502 00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:19,366 Weird how that never crossed my mind. 503 00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:22,202 Okay, revision -- you and Rory, you move in here. 504 00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:23,662 A-And not on my terms. 505 00:19:23,745 --> 00:19:25,831 You could -- You could change anything you want. 506 00:19:26,373 --> 00:19:27,916 You -- 507 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,042 Uh -- Uh... 508 00:19:29,126 --> 00:19:30,669 - Hey, hey, hey. Hey, yeah. - What happened? 509 00:19:30,752 --> 00:19:31,795 Where's Poppy? 510 00:19:31,879 --> 00:19:33,046 I wanted to see how things were going. 511 00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:35,382 Uh, I-I feel bad. Did I ruin things? 512 00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:36,967 Hang up! I'm on with Poppy. 513 00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:38,093 Oh, merge me! 514 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,803 Goodbye! 515 00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:41,263 Hey. 516 00:19:41,346 --> 00:19:42,389 Where were we? 517 00:19:42,472 --> 00:19:44,683 Uh, you asked me to move in with you, 518 00:19:44,766 --> 00:19:47,019 which is an amazing offer. 519 00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,313 I'd like to sleep on it? 520 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:53,066 As long as I get to sleep next to you. 521 00:19:55,527 --> 00:19:56,612 Okay. 522 00:20:01,825 --> 00:20:03,452 Good night, Poppy. 523 00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:04,953 Good night, Douglas. 524 00:20:12,169 --> 00:20:13,503 That's it. 525 00:20:13,587 --> 00:20:14,713 I'm taking myself off the market. 526 00:20:14,796 --> 00:20:16,590 Frasier Crane has... 527 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:19,718 Hmm. 528 00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:25,682 Yes. Yes. Yes, yes. 529 00:20:25,766 --> 00:20:27,184 Nope! 530 00:20:27,267 --> 00:20:29,228 Hey, man. You've been playing for half an hour. 531 00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:31,146 - Give someone else a chance. - Leave me be! 532 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,398 My friend Angie and my daughter both abandoned me, 533 00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:35,400 and now I've lost my best child friend. 534 00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:36,902 No, you haven't. 535 00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:39,905 What happened? 536 00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:42,115 You run out of luck with your new woman? 537 00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:44,076 No, I got her number. 538 00:20:44,368 --> 00:20:46,870 Well, her mom's number. You get it. 539 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,373 {\an8}But this was supposed to be a bro night. 540 00:20:49,456 --> 00:20:52,084 {\an8}I shouldn't have ditched you for a pair of cute peepers. 541 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:53,752 {\an8}- So, why did you? You were right. 542 00:20:53,835 --> 00:20:56,046 {\an8}Second grade's been a desert. 543 00:20:56,129 --> 00:20:58,340 {\an8}But you know who's been with me the whole time? 544 00:20:58,423 --> 00:20:59,466 {\an8}Me? 545 00:20:59,549 --> 00:21:00,717 {\an8}- No, my mom. Oh. 546 00:21:00,801 --> 00:21:02,135 {\an8}- But also you. 547 00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:04,554 {\an8}That's why I told Taylor I had to see about a grown man. 548 00:21:04,638 --> 00:21:05,931 {\an8}Thanks, man. 549 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:08,809 {\an8}- You want to claw? Yeah. 550 00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:09,893 {\an8}Let's win some plushies 551 00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:11,895 {\an8}and love them super hard for the rest of our lives. 552 00:21:11,979 --> 00:21:13,188 {\an8} 553 00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:14,982 {\an8}- All right. 554 00:21:15,065 --> 00:21:16,149 {\an8}Take it away. 555 00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:17,526 {\an8}Yeah, all right. 556 00:21:17,609 --> 00:21:18,610 {\an8}- No, no, no, too forward. Yeah. 557 00:21:18,694 --> 00:21:19,695 {\an8}- Forward? No, go -- 558 00:21:19,778 --> 00:21:20,946 {\an8}- What are you doing? Which way?! 559 00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:22,030 {\an8}Get your head in the game! 560 00:21:22,114 --> 00:21:24,157 {\an8}Stop yelling! This is stressful!