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[solemn music playing]
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[people crying softly]
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♪ Holy as the sunrise ♪
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♪ Clear as the water ♪
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♪ Me ♪
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♪ I'm stronger ♪
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♪ Stronger ♪
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♪ Stronger ♪
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♪ Mmm, mmm ♪
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♪ You make me love everybody
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♪ But me ♪
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♪ But me, but me ♪
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[Jamal] Ruby, Jamal.
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I still haven't heard back from you,
and as I mentioned five minutes ago,
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I was giving you five minutes
to let me know
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if you want to come with me
to the reception.
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So, time's up.
You need to let me know if you're coming.
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And if you're not coming, let me know.
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And also let me know
if you're not going to let me know.
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- You ready?
- I'm going with Jasmine.
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No.
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No, I'm going to drive you
and pick you up. I need eyes on you.
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Dad, you're being a little crazy
and it's not a good look.
24
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Agreed. Dwayne, nothing's going to happen
to and from Brentwood.
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You don't know what could happen.
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Shit's changing here.
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- Stop making him so afraid.
- No. Fear makes him alert.
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- He needs to be on guard.
- I am on guard.
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I literally have an escape plan
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for any natural, divine,
or human-induced global disaster.
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- Look, I'm not playing around.
- Neither am I.
32
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I'm talking meteorological, hydrological,
geophysical, fungal--
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Listen to me.
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As long as I've lived in Freeridge,
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it's always been
about the devils that we knew.
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And now it's about the devils
that we don't know.
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Anything could happen now.
Anything, at any moment.
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You're being hyperbolic.
See? This is where you get it from.
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Everyone's going to be fine.
40
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This is just a bump
in the proverbial road.
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Sometimes things need to take
a turn for the worse
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before they get better.
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Stop talking like someone's gonna
put a sack on his head
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and throw him in the back of a van.
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[laughs]
46
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- Yeah, that would never happen.
- [Fran] Exactly.
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So, honey, go.
Just text us once you get there.
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- [sighs] Why you gotta do that?
- Do what?
49
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Undercut me right in front of him.
50
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We're supposed to be a team,
and that was not teamwork.
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I'm sorry, baby.
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I know you're stressed,
but we gotta be real.
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No one's rolling up on our weird kid.
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Then you pull the wide end
up over the narrow end.
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Uh...
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Which way's up over?
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You gotta cross the wide end
under the narrow one.
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Can't you just tie it for me?
I told Monse I'd be there an hour ago.
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Ties aren't just for events.
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Maybe someday you'll have a job
and you'll have to wear one.
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Then I'll hire you to do it for me.
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My professional tying is expensive.
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Well, if I'm wearing a tie,
I can afford you.
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You're a good kid.
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I'm proud of you.
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Thank you.
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I had a shitty dad.
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Never thought I'd be a good one.
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You know the old saying...
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You don't get to choose your parents.
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Well, truth is...
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you don't really get to choose
your kids either.
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If I could...
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I'd choose you, mijo.
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Yeah.
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You're the first person
I've ever looked up to.
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Me?
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I'm nothing to look up to.
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No.
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I know nothing.
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As long as I've been alive,
I've been nothing.
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You, you aren't nothing.
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You're a kid who's never needed anything,
let alone anyone,
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to be something.
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Someone to look up to.
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[chuckles softly]
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[clears throat]
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Well, I'm proud of you too...
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Dad.
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- Better get going.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
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[clears throat]
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I'll see you later.
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Yeah.
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- Okay.
- [phone buzzing]
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- Yo.
- Have you heard from Ruby?
96
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- No. You?
- No.
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00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:05,564
I think the tire incident was
really triggering. He's in a bad way.
98
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,469
How do you know
if you haven't heard from him?
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I looked through his window.
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He's in bed,
in the same underwear from three days ago,
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and still no socks on the floor.
102
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Poor guy. He's all bottled up.
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Yeah.[sighs]
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- So when are you leaving?
- Now.
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- We meeting at my place or yours?
- I'm already here.
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- I don't see you.
- I'm in Brentwood.
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I had to get here early
to support my girl,
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and I needed a little "me" time
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to do a proper reassessment
of the investigation
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and what our next step should be,
'cause that's what leaders do.
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You're pulling this on today, of all days?
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It takes a certain kind of person
to be a leader,
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- and it ain't always pretty.
- Do you have a Lyft account I can use?
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I don't have any money
and my dad cut off my emergency fund.
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Ay. Pobrecito, sorry,
but that's just another example
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of why you were meant to follow, not lead.
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Leaders always have a back-up plan,
a Plan B.
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- A "plan your way to victory, bitches."
- [phone beeping]
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[exhales sharply]
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[exhales]
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[Jamal] Thank you for your service
guarding my body and our home.
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I know it's a lot to ask
and I hate to ask--
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- Then don't.
- I need a favor.
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I know you have faith
in our skills to find Lil' Ricky.
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- I don't.
- You do. It's...
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It's in your body language.
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Anyway, with Monse in mourning
and Ruby triggered,
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our collective brain
isn't operating at full capacity,
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and I fear we aren't going to make
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the arbitrary deadline in a few weeks
set by your boss.
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Emphasis on "arbitrary."
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- And?
- [Jamal] I say that with respect.
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In no way am I insinuating
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that Cuchillos is thoughtless
in her decision-making--
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- What do you want?
- We need an extension.
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And I don't know how to ask for one.
137
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So I thought I could ask you to ask her.
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I mean, I don't want to ask you
to go out of your way, but...
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- Can you?
- Can I what?
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Go out of your way...
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- to ask her.
- That all?
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Oh!
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You're open to more asks. [chuckles]
How about a ride to Brentwood?
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How you doing, baby?
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Can we go?
146
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- I know it's uncomfortable, but--
- We shouldn't be here.
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We're the people she left, and lied about.
No one wants us here.
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What about your brother and sister?
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They want you here.
Doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
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She was your mother.
Those kids are your family.
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Someone else doesn't want you here?
Screw 'em.
152
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Now eat. When was the last time
you had something to eat?
153
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When I was hungry.
154
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I don't like anything on your plate.
155
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What about theirs?
156
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Try the quiche. It's good.
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Take a bite and I'll walk away.
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- Sorry I'm late.
- It doesn't matter.
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[Jamal] I'm still sorry.
160
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:50,965
And I'm sorry
that you're going through this and...
161
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that I said all that rough stuff
about not needing you and--
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It's fine. We both said rough stuff.
163
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I'm sorry too.
164
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You okay? Anything I can do?
165
00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:03,823
No. You don't have to stay.
166
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None of you do.
167
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This is just another exercise
in a life filled with awkward discomfort.
168
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:09,952
We're not leaving.
169
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It's non-negotiable.
170
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- Thank you.
- You are so welcome.
171
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Everybody is so nice and sharing plates.
172
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I mean, death really does bring
the best out of the community.
173
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- He thinks you're the help.
- [laughs]
174
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Douchebag.
175
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You know who doesn't get mistaken
for the help? A leader.
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Gracias.
177
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I'm here.
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Talk.
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00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:48,895
My brother and his friends need more time.
180
00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:52,157
Because a mom died?
Is this why you brought me out here?
181
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I didn't ask you to be a messenger,
so don't be.
182
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They don't need more time.
183
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:00,084
But we do.
184
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,173
With 19th Street.
185
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,254
They're getting riled up
and crossing lines.
186
00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:09,417
We need to calm them down before
they do something that can't be undone.
187
00:09:09,966 --> 00:09:11,926
- We gotta give them Jefferson--
- "We"?
188
00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:15,386
- I just think that if we--
- Your job isn't to think.
189
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:17,972
- It's to do what I tell you to.
- That is, when you tell me things.
190
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,768
What is that supposed to mean?
191
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,481
I didn't know shit about you snatching up
my brother and his friends
192
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,442
after I delivered the Prophet$,
and clean cash.
193
00:09:24,522 --> 00:09:27,032
I was right about that,
just like I'm right about 19th Street.
194
00:09:27,108 --> 00:09:29,648
They're fearless. They have no code.
195
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:32,362
They don't care if they die,
196
00:09:32,447 --> 00:09:34,737
which means they don't care
if innocent people do either.
197
00:09:34,824 --> 00:09:36,034
They're little boys.
198
00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:39,619
Whiny little bitches
whose balls haven't dropped.
199
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:42,330
- Traviesos.
- Traviesos we can't control.
200
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,247
We need to work with them.
201
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,046
- Neutralize them.
- [Chuchillos chuckles]
202
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:51,549
- If I could just give them Jefferson--
- Jefferson isn't yours to give.
203
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:54,053
That territory was part of the deal I made
204
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:57,385
to get you and your little brother
out of that trap house alive.
205
00:09:58,306 --> 00:09:59,966
Just let 19th do what they do.
206
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,885
- They'll wind up killing each other.
- You don't understand.
207
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,230
You've been off the streets too long.
208
00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:10,106
- They're bad for business.
- This conversation is bad for business.
209
00:10:10,193 --> 00:10:13,113
- It's wasting my time.
- What about one of my streets?
210
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:15,453
- First or Second?
- Your streets?
211
00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:20,371
You know what's yours, papacito?
212
00:10:21,496 --> 00:10:22,366
Nada.
213
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,463
You own nothing.
214
00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:28,042
You don't even own yourself.
215
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,881
I own you, Spooky.
216
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,965
Never forget that.
217
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:35,891
Okay?
218
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,571
- [girl] Bullshit.
- It was enough so that Baby J was sore.
219
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,901
- [gasps]
- Really sore,
220
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:56,157
and he's never been sore before,
if you know what I mean.
221
00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:57,529
No.
222
00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:59,945
- But your skin does look extra soft.
- Mmm.
223
00:11:00,034 --> 00:11:03,254
It's what happens when your body
gets totally milked out.
224
00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:06,169
It's the opposite of dehydration.
The skin gets supple.
225
00:11:06,249 --> 00:11:08,589
- Good to know.
- You know what else is good to know?
226
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,838
I think I'm ready
to give sushi another try.
227
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,550
- [gasps]
- [laughing]
228
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:16,341
Well, would you look
what the cat dragged in.
229
00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:20,176
Give me a minute and I'll be right back
and we can talk more about me.
230
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,888
- [gasps]
- Why all the urgency, Jamal?
231
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,345
There is no urgency.
232
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:28,895
Mm-hmm. I've seen that face before.
You're onto something. What are you onto?
233
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:31,650
- More cheese. I'm hungry.
- Ah! I call bullshit.
234
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:33,403
Soft, watery bullshit.
235
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:35,364
- You're lactose intolerant.
- Fine.
236
00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,195
It's true. I have weak bowels.
237
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,410
- Mmm.
- But if you can't see it,
238
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:40,870
I'm not going to tell you.
239
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:44,159
- Hmm-mm. You're gaming me.
- Maybe.
240
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,155
Maybe not.
241
00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:47,286
[laughs] Nah,
'cause I got leader's intuition,
242
00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:49,133
and you got nothing but a tense face.
243
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:50,499
Then I'll be on my way.
244
00:11:50,585 --> 00:11:53,295
- And I'll be on mine.
- [both fake laugh]
245
00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:56,585
Ha! Leader's intuition, my ass!
246
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,141
[exhales]
247
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:04,678
- Like what you see?
- Uh, I was just... um...
248
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:07,273
- Hi.
- Hi.
249
00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:08,902
- It's been a while.
- Mm-hmm.
250
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:11,108
- How are you?
- Great. Awesome.
251
00:12:11,189 --> 00:12:14,319
- Mm-hmm.
- And sad, given the circumstances.
252
00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:18,243
How are you?
You got some nice color on you.
253
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:20,071
- Did you just return from a trip?
- Nope.
254
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,776
- Change your number?
- Step off.
255
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:26,958
- And you'd better watch yourself, kid.
- I was just making small talk.
256
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,248
Fine. Why didn't you text
me or Monse back?
257
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:32,423
Because I have nothing to say.
258
00:12:32,502 --> 00:12:35,592
I don't know who this "Coochie Chillow"
person is you keep asking about.
259
00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:38,222
And all this RollerWorld shit
was a long time ago.
260
00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:40,219
I have nothing new to add.
261
00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:41,838
Listen.
262
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:46,768
This is not the time, nor place,
to be dredging up the past, you hear me?
263
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:48,690
Now...
264
00:12:50,353 --> 00:12:51,403
tend to your friend.
265
00:12:53,856 --> 00:12:54,936
Mm-hmm.
266
00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:57,033
She knows something.
267
00:12:57,110 --> 00:13:00,490
Cheesecake, cream puff things,
chocolate cake, cookies.
268
00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:02,161
- More cream puff things, and a--
- Stop.
269
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,030
I don't need anything but you.
270
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,117
Just be here.
271
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,738
Be by my side, okay?
272
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:10,245
- I'm fine.
- [Ruby] We're all fine,
273
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,334
until we die.
274
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:15,169
- Ruby, come on, man.
- Come on what?
275
00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,212
- You made it.
- What else was I supposed to do?
276
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:20,508
Stay home? Wait for Cuchillos to kill me?
277
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,181
Nah, I can wait here instead.
278
00:13:24,012 --> 00:13:26,972
At least there's sandwiches
and cream puff things.
279
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:28,886
- Inside voices, boo.
- [Ruby] Exactly.
280
00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:31,055
We should all be listening
to that inner voice.
281
00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:33,064
That voice telling us
that we're not good enough,
282
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,646
we're never gonna make it
out of Freeridge,
283
00:13:34,731 --> 00:13:37,361
and even if we do get out,
we'll probably end up offing ourselves.
284
00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:39,442
- Like Monse's mom.
- [people murmur]
285
00:13:39,527 --> 00:13:41,107
Now, I don't know what we're waiting for.
286
00:13:41,195 --> 00:13:42,235
Maybe we should do it now,
287
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:44,282
while we still look good
in our caskets, right?
288
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:51,504
- You gotta chill.
- I am chill.
289
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:55,591
You may have said that in a calm voice,
but what you did back there was not chill.
290
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:56,668
What's going on with you?
291
00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:59,423
I'm just done dancing around the bullshit
of not telling the truth.
292
00:13:59,505 --> 00:14:02,795
And the truth is, sometimes I wonder
if we might be better off dead.
293
00:14:02,884 --> 00:14:06,264
Ay. Enough.
I know you almost lost your life,
294
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,096
but encouraging other people
to lose theirs
295
00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:10,061
after your friend's mom just died...
296
00:14:10,141 --> 00:14:11,061
is some bullshit.
297
00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:14,193
Look, you have every reason
to feel triggered,
298
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:16,310
but what you're doing
is triggering other people.
299
00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:19,527
Everybody's going through their own shit.
Okay? You gotta stop.
300
00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:21,988
You are bringing down the mood...
301
00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:22,900
at a funeral.
302
00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:25,527
Then what should I do instead?
I mean, this is how I feel.
303
00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:28,575
Tuck that 'tude back back in
and pull out the cool vibe.
304
00:14:28,659 --> 00:14:29,909
How am I supposed to do that?
305
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:32,294
Yo, I don't know.
Figure it out or go home.
306
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:45,089
Why would you do that?
307
00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:46,755
To get my vibe back.
308
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:49,684
Uncool, Ruby.
309
00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,351
[in Spanish] Screw that bitch!
310
00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:58,106
If you can't make it happen for us,
311
00:14:58,189 --> 00:15:00,319
we're gonna make it happen ourselves,
312
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,940
even if we have to go through the Santos
to do it.
313
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:06,321
One week.
314
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,566
That's how long you'll last
if you go against us.
315
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:12,749
You saw what we did to the Prophet$.
316
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:14,499
Know what's better than war?
317
00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:17,379
Money.
318
00:15:18,835 --> 00:15:20,995
I know how much
you're paying the Armenians.
319
00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:23,843
They're ripping you off.
320
00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:26,007
If you want...
321
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:30,510
I could hook you up with our connect,
get you product for the low.
322
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:40,475
All right then.
323
00:15:41,732 --> 00:15:42,782
Tell me more.
324
00:15:55,997 --> 00:15:57,167
[sighs]
325
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:02,213
[in English] How's it going?
326
00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:05,380
I don't know.
327
00:16:07,884 --> 00:16:08,894
Me either.
328
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:13,009
I'm sorry I didn't reach out to you
after you left.
329
00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:16,975
I didn't know what to say,
but I should have said something.
330
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:20,274
It's been weighing on me for months
and I--
331
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:21,194
We're good.
332
00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:22,939
Always were.
333
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,989
My relationship with Julia
was its own thing.
334
00:16:28,112 --> 00:16:31,742
I've been racking my brain
trying to figure out how this happened,
335
00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:34,830
make sense of the senseless.
336
00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:37,211
That's what I've been doing my whole life.
337
00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:40,294
Trying to make sense
of why she did what she did.
338
00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:44,714
She left us too.
339
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:47,966
A few times.
340
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,005
I didn't know that.
341
00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:52,802
She always came back.
342
00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:56,931
She didn't want to do to Hayden and Cooper
what she did to you.
343
00:16:58,559 --> 00:16:59,479
Ah...
344
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:00,940
I'm sorry. I didn't...
345
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,814
- That came out all wrong.
- It's okay.
346
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:05,322
I'll be okay.
347
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:07,399
No, no, no, it's not okay. I don't...
348
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,994
want to make you feel any worse
than you already do.
349
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:11,992
No, you're not.
350
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:16,695
[sighs]
351
00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:21,964
Can I ask you something?
352
00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:24,956
Sure.
353
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,300
The night you left,
354
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:32,130
what did you say to her?
355
00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:34,800
Why?
356
00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:37,096
She never got over it.
357
00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:48,731
- [Oscar] Finally cleaning up your mess?
- I'm leaving. Caused enough drama here.
358
00:17:49,652 --> 00:17:52,412
Dwayne doesn't need any more problems
and neither do you guys.
359
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:53,408
We don't.
360
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:55,240
How'd Cesar take it?
361
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,831
Gonna tell him when I get to Bakersfield.
362
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:04,631
There's a guy there who's helping me out.
He can help you too.
363
00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:05,919
I don't need help.
364
00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:08,924
- I got everything I need.
- The Santos?
365
00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:11,172
They're more than you've ever been.
366
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:16,224
I hope they don't sell you out.
367
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:20,265
There's gonna be a day
when the hood don't love you no more,
368
00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:22,597
when your power's taken,
369
00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,515
'cause this isn't a life,
370
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,653
and you don't have to stay here.
371
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:32,488
You can make other choices,
be something you want to be.
372
00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:35,949
Thanks, Papa. You're right.
373
00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:39,082
I could be president.
374
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:41,453
Or an astronaut.
375
00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:44,669
Or a movie star.
376
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:49,415
I can be anything I want to be
because I had such a good role model!
377
00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:50,963
I had a shitty dad too, mijo,
378
00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:53,974
but you got to let go of that rage.
379
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:55,839
Let it go?
380
00:18:57,803 --> 00:18:59,723
It's the only thing that keeps me going.
381
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:02,517
It's how I survived out here.
382
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,358
Without you.
383
00:19:14,820 --> 00:19:15,990
I'll see you around.
384
00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:22,656
[door opens and closes]
385
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:26,502
So I'm supposed
to tell Cesar you're leaving?
386
00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:27,922
You're just putting that on me?
387
00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:30,540
Hey, piece of shit!
388
00:19:30,628 --> 00:19:33,588
Everything bad that's ever happened
in my life is because of you.
389
00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:36,053
You're going to crush him
the same way you crushed me.
390
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:43,766
Why didn't you ever write to me?
391
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:46,191
Or call?
392
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,228
Did you ever even think of me?
393
00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:54,648
It would have been a lot easier
if you'd just died.
394
00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:01,949
[voice breaking] You know, the worst part
about growing up without a father
395
00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:05,828
is having to be a father to a brother
without ever being a son.
396
00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:25,309
[sniffling]
397
00:20:29,437 --> 00:20:30,437
[grunts]
398
00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:36,990
Pick up your shit and don't come back.
399
00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:43,407
♪ You say you don't want a man
But a man want you and fight ♪
400
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:48,252
♪ I am an open man
And the unborn son of the wild ♪
401
00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:51,539
♪ Don't you misunderstand ♪
402
00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:53,995
♪ Don't you misunderstand ♪
403
00:20:55,129 --> 00:20:56,709
[humming]
404
00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,087
Let me help you with that.
405
00:21:00,843 --> 00:21:04,143
You know... I've been thinking a lot
about what you said
406
00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:06,351
- about keeping things buried.
- I didn't say that.
407
00:21:06,432 --> 00:21:08,772
- You know what doesn't need to be buried?
- [sighs]
408
00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:09,891
The undead.
409
00:21:10,728 --> 00:21:11,848
I don't mean zombies.
410
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:15,067
I mean people who aren't dead.
411
00:21:15,733 --> 00:21:18,073
You know what else shouldn't be buried?
412
00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:21,412
- Secrets.
- Oh, you don't quit, do you?
413
00:21:21,489 --> 00:21:24,579
Rosé, my queen.
414
00:21:25,034 --> 00:21:28,454
- The true architect of the dance line.
- Well...
415
00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:32,117
Help me help you help us.
416
00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:34,628
I don't think I can give you
the kind of help you need.
417
00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:35,750
I know Lil' Ricky's alive.
418
00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:38,961
I dug up his grave. He wasn't there.
419
00:21:39,048 --> 00:21:40,258
We found a gnomie,
420
00:21:40,341 --> 00:21:44,351
and now some scary lady wants us
to find him and if we don't find him...
421
00:21:44,428 --> 00:21:46,848
I don't want to think about what happens
if we don't find him.
422
00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:48,681
Well, I never said he was dead.
423
00:21:48,766 --> 00:21:50,676
So you do know more
than you're letting on?
424
00:21:50,768 --> 00:21:52,848
'Course I do.
How do you think I got this far?
425
00:21:53,270 --> 00:21:54,810
- Where is he?
- I don't know.
426
00:21:54,897 --> 00:21:57,687
All I can tell you is Lil' Ricky
did me a solid when no one else would.
427
00:21:57,775 --> 00:22:01,315
Got me into the studio
and got me out of Freeridge.
428
00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:03,613
He saw me for what I could be.
429
00:22:03,697 --> 00:22:04,987
That's what he does.
430
00:22:05,074 --> 00:22:09,624
He sees people's talent and potential
and helps them reach their destiny.
431
00:22:10,412 --> 00:22:12,412
The man was a saint.
432
00:22:12,498 --> 00:22:15,378
- "Was"?
- Is! I... I don't know.
433
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:18,589
And I don't know where he is,
and even if I did,
434
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:19,711
I wouldn't tell you.
435
00:22:22,132 --> 00:22:23,262
Give me my Tupperware.
436
00:22:38,107 --> 00:22:41,107
- [Monty] So Brian gave it to you?
- No, she left it for me.
437
00:22:44,905 --> 00:22:45,865
[Monty] What is it?
438
00:22:48,617 --> 00:22:49,907
It's her new book.
439
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,043
About me...
440
00:22:53,497 --> 00:22:54,997
her and what happened.
441
00:22:56,125 --> 00:22:57,745
I don't want to read this.
442
00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:01,549
Not now.
443
00:23:04,967 --> 00:23:06,757
[Monty] Do you think she wrote about me?
444
00:23:09,847 --> 00:23:12,347
I'm having a hard time reconciling
445
00:23:12,433 --> 00:23:15,103
if any of the time we shared together
was real.
446
00:23:19,398 --> 00:23:21,978
Was it real? Did it even matter to her?
447
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:26,160
Was I so bad? What did I do?
448
00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:27,866
I thought taking...
449
00:23:28,782 --> 00:23:31,912
the better job, being on the road,
would give us a better life.
450
00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:36,290
I didn't think it would make her leave.
451
00:23:37,499 --> 00:23:40,499
Maybe it was all my fault.
Maybe she was alone too much.
452
00:23:40,586 --> 00:23:42,296
That didn't make her leave.
453
00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:47,375
She was destined to leave.
454
00:23:50,638 --> 00:23:52,598
It wasn't you, or me.
455
00:23:53,223 --> 00:23:54,063
It was her.
456
00:23:57,394 --> 00:23:58,404
I'm sorry, Dad.
457
00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:02,647
I'm sorry
that you're going through this again.
458
00:24:03,317 --> 00:24:04,317
All those years...
459
00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:08,991
waiting for her to come back for you.
460
00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:14,697
[voice breaking] I always thought
she'd come back for me too.
461
00:24:27,091 --> 00:24:28,341
[sobs]
462
00:24:35,766 --> 00:24:37,846
He wouldn't leave without saying goodbye.
463
00:24:38,894 --> 00:24:40,064
He did.
464
00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:41,145
[sighs]
465
00:24:45,609 --> 00:24:46,609
What did you do?
466
00:24:47,778 --> 00:24:51,698
- I didn't do shit.
- Exactly. You didn't do shit.
467
00:24:52,449 --> 00:24:55,199
You could have helped him find a new job
or something.
468
00:24:55,285 --> 00:24:57,705
- But you chose not to.
- I don't have that kind of power.
469
00:24:57,788 --> 00:24:58,958
Oh, bullshit!
470
00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:01,209
- I bet this makes you so happy.
- Happy?
471
00:25:01,291 --> 00:25:02,421
I'm your brother.
472
00:25:04,211 --> 00:25:05,921
For most of your life I've been your dad.
473
00:25:06,964 --> 00:25:08,844
If you're going to be mad at someone,
474
00:25:10,092 --> 00:25:10,932
be mad at him.
475
00:25:12,052 --> 00:25:13,682
He's the one that up and left.
476
00:25:14,304 --> 00:25:15,314
Again.
477
00:25:23,564 --> 00:25:24,734
Cesar. Ces--
478
00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:26,065
[grunts]
479
00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:28,525
[Cesar panting]
480
00:25:29,236 --> 00:25:30,566
Monse was right.
481
00:25:31,655 --> 00:25:32,865
You are cursed.
482
00:25:34,324 --> 00:25:37,164
Everything bad that has happened to me
is because of you.
483
00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:51,432
I had to get out.
484
00:25:53,761 --> 00:25:56,261
Everything was just starting
to feel claustrophobic...
485
00:25:57,097 --> 00:25:58,177
like I can't breathe.
486
00:25:58,766 --> 00:26:00,096
It's the pain of loss.
487
00:26:01,894 --> 00:26:03,484
You can't shake feeling shitty.
488
00:26:06,523 --> 00:26:07,573
But it's normal.
489
00:26:08,650 --> 00:26:09,740
And feeling bad
490
00:26:10,652 --> 00:26:11,532
is normal.
491
00:26:14,531 --> 00:26:15,621
But that's the thing.
492
00:26:16,950 --> 00:26:17,990
I don't feel bad.
493
00:26:20,537 --> 00:26:22,367
Or sad or shitty.
494
00:26:24,750 --> 00:26:26,000
I feel relieved.
495
00:26:29,379 --> 00:26:30,379
I'm glad she's gone.
496
00:26:32,341 --> 00:26:34,011
She can't disappoint me anymore.
497
00:26:35,177 --> 00:26:37,547
Now I can't wonder
whether or not she loved me.
498
00:26:39,139 --> 00:26:40,429
Or if she read my letter.
499
00:26:41,308 --> 00:26:42,678
Or if she'll write me back.
500
00:26:43,685 --> 00:26:46,105
Or leave me a voicemail
that I didn't even listen to.
501
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:50,570
I deleted the last one she left
and I don't even care.
502
00:26:56,156 --> 00:26:58,776
I don't care that I don't know
the last thing that she said to me.
503
00:27:00,869 --> 00:27:01,829
That's okay.
504
00:27:03,455 --> 00:27:04,705
It's okay.
505
00:27:05,999 --> 00:27:07,169
Is it?
506
00:27:08,752 --> 00:27:10,002
Is it okay?
507
00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:14,300
'Cause I'm worried that all the shit
that keeps happening to me...
508
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:19,967
to us...
509
00:27:21,765 --> 00:27:24,135
I'm worried
that it's starting not to penetrate,
510
00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:26,977
or not make me feel anything.
511
00:27:28,355 --> 00:27:31,105
What if I'm totally desensitized
to pain and loss?
512
00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:35,489
What if I become one of those people
that are numb to life?
513
00:27:36,947 --> 00:27:39,237
I don't want to be that person, Ruby.
514
00:27:42,786 --> 00:27:43,826
I know that feeling.
515
00:27:46,540 --> 00:27:47,540
I feel that too.
516
00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:51,705
But these feelings pass.
517
00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:55,089
How do you know?
518
00:27:56,425 --> 00:27:57,255
Because...
519
00:27:57,759 --> 00:27:59,799
you questioning if you're not feeling
520
00:28:00,929 --> 00:28:03,099
means you're still feeling something.
521
00:28:09,771 --> 00:28:10,731
[gasps]
522
00:28:10,814 --> 00:28:12,074
[sighs]
523
00:28:12,858 --> 00:28:14,648
What are you doing
peeping through my window?
524
00:28:14,735 --> 00:28:16,485
Like you never peeped through mine?
525
00:28:18,238 --> 00:28:19,068
Door.
526
00:28:26,955 --> 00:28:28,115
So what's up?
527
00:28:28,665 --> 00:28:29,825
I'm sorry I kissed you.
528
00:28:30,667 --> 00:28:32,497
I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.
529
00:28:33,503 --> 00:28:36,093
- Okay.
- It's just that...
530
00:28:36,673 --> 00:28:37,513
lately...
531
00:28:38,342 --> 00:28:40,432
the only thing
that makes me comfortable...
532
00:28:42,137 --> 00:28:43,177
is you.
533
00:28:44,598 --> 00:28:45,428
Exactly.
534
00:28:46,642 --> 00:28:49,482
- That means they're not real feelings.
- But they feel real to me.
535
00:28:49,561 --> 00:28:53,361
'Cause you're worried about the unknown,
and I represent the known.
536
00:28:54,316 --> 00:28:55,726
So why is that a bad thing?
537
00:28:55,817 --> 00:28:57,527
Because you only tell me
about your feelings
538
00:28:57,611 --> 00:28:59,111
when you are all up in them.
539
00:29:00,072 --> 00:29:04,242
You're scared and vulnerable,
and I represent security and a crutch.
540
00:29:05,369 --> 00:29:08,999
But a crutch is something that you need,
not something that you want,
541
00:29:09,081 --> 00:29:12,461
and I want to be with somebody
who wants to be with me at all times,
542
00:29:12,542 --> 00:29:14,002
not just when they're feeling afraid.
543
00:29:15,254 --> 00:29:17,344
I'm a whole life's love, boo,
544
00:29:18,048 --> 00:29:20,928
not just part of someone's
one-eighth life crisis.
545
00:29:21,009 --> 00:29:22,219
But...
546
00:29:22,302 --> 00:29:25,352
- These feelings, they might be real.
- [Jasmine] Might be.
547
00:29:26,139 --> 00:29:28,599
If you don't know... they're not.
548
00:29:32,020 --> 00:29:32,900
Good night.
549
00:29:35,607 --> 00:29:38,687
♪ Is this something worth saving? ♪
550
00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:41,907
♪ I just can't seem to gauge it ♪
551
00:29:41,989 --> 00:29:44,409
♪ There's so much on my-- ♪
552
00:29:44,491 --> 00:29:46,911
♪ Gonna get down ♪
553
00:29:49,579 --> 00:29:52,709
♪ I'd like to feel you... ♪
554
00:29:52,791 --> 00:29:55,171
[Rosé] He sees
people's talent and potential
555
00:29:55,252 --> 00:29:57,672
and helps them reach their destiny.
556
00:29:57,754 --> 00:30:01,264
♪ I've got to get with you ♪
557
00:30:01,341 --> 00:30:05,391
♪ We're all caught up in the mood ♪
558
00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:07,760
♪ It's when the beat is on the street ♪
559
00:30:07,848 --> 00:30:09,268
- ♪ Don't you know-- ♪
- [music stops]
560
00:30:14,396 --> 00:30:16,266
♪ Sitting in class and my tummy starts-- ♪
561
00:30:18,650 --> 00:30:22,030
♪...At large
Gotta go buy it so you can eat ♪
562
00:30:22,654 --> 00:30:24,494
♪ Gotta have nourishment-- ♪
563
00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:36,498
♪ Jack be nimble, Jack be quick
Jack jump over the-- ♪
564
00:30:37,377 --> 00:30:40,547
♪ So Jack and Jill went up the hill
Because-- ♪
565
00:30:41,465 --> 00:30:42,755
[rewind screech]
566
00:30:42,841 --> 00:30:45,391
♪ Jack jump over the candlestick-- ♪
567
00:30:46,011 --> 00:30:47,931
♪...Lamb
But she couldn't eat it ♪
568
00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:49,353
♪ It was her pet, yeah-- ♪
569
00:30:49,973 --> 00:30:52,483
- [rewind screech]
- ♪ Crack, crack, uh-huh-- ♪
570
00:30:54,519 --> 00:30:56,689
[suspenseful music playing]
571
00:31:05,155 --> 00:31:06,155
I found him.
572
00:31:07,157 --> 00:31:08,527
I found Lil' Ricky.
573
00:31:08,617 --> 00:31:10,577
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
574
00:31:11,745 --> 00:31:14,075
♪ If you deal it in the nighttime ♪
575
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,420
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
576
00:31:18,210 --> 00:31:20,210
♪ Never seen another like mine ♪
577
00:31:20,295 --> 00:31:22,545
♪ Shining like a diamond ring ♪
578
00:31:23,215 --> 00:31:25,215
♪ I got these bitches all on me ♪
579
00:31:26,259 --> 00:31:27,179
♪ Yeah ♪
580
00:31:27,260 --> 00:31:30,600
♪ I'm feeling like an island
In the open sea ♪
581
00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,390
♪ Trippin'
Got this water all around me ♪
582
00:31:34,267 --> 00:31:36,557
♪ I can see the clouds coming in ♪
583
00:31:37,562 --> 00:31:39,692
♪ They tryin' to block my shine again ♪
584
00:31:40,774 --> 00:31:42,824
♪ They tryin' to block my shine again ♪
585
00:31:43,652 --> 00:31:45,702
♪ I blow 'em off like the wind ♪
586
00:31:47,030 --> 00:31:49,370
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
587
00:31:50,242 --> 00:31:52,412
♪ If you deal it in the nighttime ♪
588
00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:55,462
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
589
00:31:56,540 --> 00:31:58,790
♪ Never seen another like mine ♪
590
00:31:59,835 --> 00:32:01,995
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
591
00:32:02,963 --> 00:32:05,513
♪ I make all my haters go blind ♪
592
00:32:06,258 --> 00:32:08,468
♪ I'mma shine, I'mma shine ♪
593
00:32:09,386 --> 00:32:11,466
♪ Never seen another like mine ♪