1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,626 {\an8}[owl hooting] 2 00:00:03,962 --> 00:00:05,005 [electricity crackles] 3 00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:08,758 [Laszlo] To create new life from dead human parts. 4 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:12,721 The brass ring of all scientific pursuits. 5 00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:15,265 {\an8}I first tried building a man to take my place 6 00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:18,643 {\an8}when I was drafted in to fight your American Civil War. 7 00:00:18,643 --> 00:00:23,064 Thing is, I ended up going there myself. Had a fantastic time. 8 00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:24,733 Good food, good fellowship. 9 00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:27,318 I restarted the project several times over the years. 10 00:00:27,318 --> 00:00:28,403 When I took up judo, 11 00:00:29,237 --> 00:00:33,491 when my band needed a drummer, and during the piggyback craze of the 1980s. 12 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:35,994 But I never damn well finished it. 13 00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:38,204 Always set my sights just too high. 14 00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:41,332 But if repetition is the father of progress, 15 00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:43,001 then call me Big Papa. 16 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:46,588 So technically that does rhyme with orange. 17 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:50,925 Ugh. Good gravy. What smells so bad in here, and can I please have some? 18 00:00:50,925 --> 00:00:52,218 No, you may not. 19 00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:56,639 This is a proprietary amniotic bath of my own invention for my new man. 20 00:00:56,639 --> 00:01:01,811 I intend to reanimate once dead human flesh into my own modern Prometheus. 21 00:01:01,811 --> 00:01:03,938 Like, uh, Dr. Frankenstein. 22 00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:05,023 I don't know who that is. 23 00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:09,444 Dr. Frankenstein from the book and the countless movies. 24 00:01:09,444 --> 00:01:12,655 No, I've never heard of him. What I'm doing is completely original. 25 00:01:12,655 --> 00:01:16,868 I shall call him Cravensworth's Monster, and he shall be our new familiar. 26 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:20,580 Well, you know I love a weekend build. I can go get my Phillips-head. 27 00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:23,833 Fantastic. As you can see, all my heads are fucked. 28 00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:27,170 If you can persuade your friend Phillip to part with his, then we're in business. 29 00:02:06,876 --> 00:02:08,211 I start a new job today. 30 00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:09,379 Kind of a funny story, actually. 31 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:10,964 I'll make this quick, 'cause I'm running late. 32 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,340 {\an8}So, I'm at Panera Bread. 33 00:02:12,340 --> 00:02:16,261 {\an8}I get this call from this guy named Rob. He's over at Cannon Capital. 34 00:02:16,261 --> 00:02:17,720 {\an8}Now, he's yelling profanity. 35 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,098 {\an8}A lot of bad words about his order that we got wrong. 36 00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:21,558 {\an8}I'm so sorry. Sam! 37 00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:23,726 {\an8}He's, like, a regular. He always gets the same thing. 38 00:02:23,726 --> 00:02:25,019 {\an8}The Napa Almond Chicken sammie. 39 00:02:25,019 --> 00:02:26,062 Sorry about the yelling. 40 00:02:26,062 --> 00:02:28,690 [Guillermo] He got the Green Goddess, which are different sandwiches. 41 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:29,858 If you know, you know. 42 00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:32,360 So I offer to correct it and bring it down here myself. 43 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:34,904 I meet Lamar in the lobby, he's from the mail room, 44 00:02:34,904 --> 00:02:37,532 and we start chatting and he asked me if I graduated high school. 45 00:02:37,532 --> 00:02:40,410 And I say, "Yeah." And he says, "How much do you make at Panera?" 46 00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:43,413 And I tell him and he says, "How'd you like to make $3 more an hour?" 47 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,248 [chuckles] And I say, "What?" 48 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:49,043 And, well, fairy-tale ending, I'm a finance guy now. 49 00:02:49,043 --> 00:02:52,088 I mean, it's only the mail room, but still. 50 00:02:52,088 --> 00:02:53,423 It's a start. 51 00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:58,469 No. No, no, you can't come in with me. This is like a job-job, like, a real job. 52 00:02:59,053 --> 00:03:00,221 I'll just see you back home. 53 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:06,603 [phone rings] 54 00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:08,605 Telephone! 55 00:03:08,605 --> 00:03:13,359 Colin Robinson, come over here. We have progress I need you to observe. [laughs] 56 00:03:13,359 --> 00:03:14,694 How do you do, sir? 57 00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:16,362 - [screams] - Shit! 58 00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:18,489 Observe with your eyes, not your hands, Colin Robinson. 59 00:03:18,489 --> 00:03:21,326 - Fine, I'll get it. - I'll leave you to it. 60 00:03:21,326 --> 00:03:24,913 Hello? No, Guillermo does not live here anymore. He lives in the shed. 61 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:27,916 Oh, you are Guillermo. Guillermo, now is not a good time. 62 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,084 Laszlo's new jack-off machine has malfunctioned. 63 00:03:30,084 --> 00:03:31,377 It's not a jack-off machine. 64 00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,338 Why don't you call back in a week? Thank you. 65 00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:35,757 [Nadja] Ugh! Who is cooking meat pies? 66 00:03:35,757 --> 00:03:38,760 - Oh. Of course. A jack-off machine. - Yes. 67 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:42,013 - It's not a jack-off machine. - It could be. 68 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:43,973 Why would I make myself another jack-off machine 69 00:03:43,973 --> 00:03:47,393 when I have a perfectly good one I built 100 years ago? 70 00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:50,939 Anyway, my darling, I haven't got time to sit here and shoot the shit with you. 71 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,899 Colin Robinson and I are very busy. 72 00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,151 Well, I don't want to be here anyway. It stinks. 73 00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:56,319 Ah! Hold that lift. 74 00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:58,446 Keep up the good work, Jacob. 75 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:01,950 Colin Robinson, I need you to check the electric current. 76 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:03,451 Uh, how do you want me to do that? 77 00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:04,911 [Laszlo] Put your finger in the tank. 78 00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:07,789 Do not put your whole hand in there. Just your finger. 79 00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:09,207 Okay. 80 00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,418 [screams] 81 00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:14,963 [groans] 82 00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:19,425 Ha! Fantastic. [laughs] 83 00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:23,221 Hey, I just wanna let you know I'm borrowing your iron 84 00:04:23,221 --> 00:04:25,473 'cause I wanna look good for work tomorrow. 85 00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:27,267 For my new job. 86 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,560 - You are not at Panera? - No. 87 00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:33,856 Cannon Capital Strategies. We're a smallish private equity firm. 88 00:04:33,856 --> 00:04:35,149 It's pretty complicated stuff. 89 00:04:35,149 --> 00:04:36,442 [yawns] 90 00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:39,070 And your job there is collecting irons? 91 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:42,740 No, I'm gonna go iron, then I'm gonna go to bed because I don't have time for this. 92 00:04:44,742 --> 00:04:48,496 Nandor, Guillermo has a big-time, big boy, big-dick job. 93 00:04:48,496 --> 00:04:49,831 I do not like this at all. 94 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,417 He will be amongst his own kind. He'll be fine. 95 00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:56,838 No, Nandor, he won't. He has been here for 15 years with the easy ride from us. 96 00:04:56,838 --> 00:05:00,216 And now, when the pressure gets too much for him, who is he going to blame? 97 00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:02,719 Us, for casting him out of paradise. 98 00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:03,803 A couple of years back, 99 00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:06,889 I heard about a familiar in Queens, retired from the old vampire game. 100 00:05:06,889 --> 00:05:09,809 Got herself a studio apartment, job in marketing. 101 00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:13,771 She could not handle the shock of returning to the regular human world. 102 00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:18,776 Two months later, she comes back, kills all of the vampires in her old house. 103 00:05:18,776 --> 00:05:20,862 - [gasps] - Guillermo's gonna kill us all. 104 00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:23,531 Good golly, you'd think a so-called man of science 105 00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:27,452 would have a better way of checking for an electrical short. [chuckles] 106 00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,162 - [electricity crackles] - [Laszlo] Colin Robinson! 107 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,831 Well, back to the grindstone. Coming! Coming! 108 00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:34,792 Superstructure is sound, bones are good, 109 00:05:34,792 --> 00:05:37,128 and the nerves are literally made of steel. 110 00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:40,048 Yeah, but what about the head? You kinda need a head. 111 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,632 - Goggles. - Okay. 112 00:05:41,632 --> 00:05:44,385 Don't you worry about the head, me old fruit. I've got a perfect one. 113 00:05:44,385 --> 00:05:47,805 Our mule shall have the visage of a prince. 114 00:05:47,805 --> 00:05:50,350 - Oh, Rock Hudson. - Rock Hudson, is that his name? 115 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,684 - Yeah. - Rock Hard-son, more like. 116 00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:56,064 That'd be great. Problem is, uh, he's dead. Been dead for years. 117 00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,231 {\an8}- Really? - [Colin] Yeah. 118 00:05:57,231 --> 00:06:00,109 Do you know if someone had the foresight to have preserved his head? 119 00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:02,362 - I doubt it. - Barbarians. 120 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,781 That puts us on the back foot. We need a hot head. 121 00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:06,032 Yeah, from a cool dude. 122 00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:08,242 He doesn't have to be cool. The head is purely decorative. 123 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:11,871 Now, what's the most expedient way of examining a wide variety of heads 124 00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:14,499 before selecting one for removal and transplant? 125 00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:19,128 I'm actually certified for all the rideshare services. 126 00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:23,508 I mean, you talk about a quick and easy energy drain. This is the job. 127 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:26,219 And you swear this is the best way to find a usable human head? 128 00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:28,137 Mmm. There he is. I like his smile. 129 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,348 - Hi. For Doug? - You got it. 130 00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:32,892 - Hop in. - [sighs] Oh, man. [sniffles] 131 00:06:33,601 --> 00:06:36,270 Oh, I-I didn't order a-a group ride. 132 00:06:36,270 --> 00:06:37,480 I don't love his ears. 133 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,274 All right. You heard the fella. Hit the bricks, Doug. 134 00:06:40,274 --> 00:06:41,651 - What? - Fuck the fuck off. 135 00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:42,944 Get away from the car. 136 00:06:43,444 --> 00:06:47,532 I do have feelings, believe it or not. I-I get lonely. 137 00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:50,284 Would you say you're kind of an emotional guy? 138 00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:53,663 Hey. [grunts] 139 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:59,710 The problem with making new friends is that 99% of people are insipid cretins. 140 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:00,920 Hi. For Cecil? 141 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,171 What the fuck's in his mouth? 142 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,923 - Adult braces. - No. 143 00:07:04,632 --> 00:07:05,466 Seriously? 144 00:07:05,466 --> 00:07:09,554 But if I could literally make a new friend from scratch... 145 00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:10,847 Do you cry at Good Will Hunting? 146 00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:12,223 Hmm, no. 147 00:07:12,223 --> 00:07:13,850 Okay. Get the fuck out. 148 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:15,726 How do you like them apples? 149 00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:18,813 Call me a softy, but that's what I'm looking for 150 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:21,023 in a head that's gonna be severed off and attached 151 00:07:21,023 --> 00:07:23,443 to a body made up of cadaver parts. 152 00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:29,866 Your pack. 153 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:32,034 Good sir. 154 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:38,040 Nancy. [whispers] How did you get in here? This is a place of business. 155 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,709 You're gonna get me fired. Get out. 156 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:42,170 [Jordan] Hey, team. Will you bring it in for a sec here? 157 00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:45,381 You may have noticed, uh, some cameras roaming around. 158 00:07:45,381 --> 00:07:47,133 I'd like everybody to ignore them. 159 00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:50,344 These guys are making a documentary about innovations in global finance, 160 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:52,096 and guess who makes the perfect subject? 161 00:07:52,096 --> 00:07:53,473 Say it with me. 162 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:56,434 [all] Cannon Capital Strategies. 163 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,812 So, please, at least try to look like you're busy, okay? 164 00:07:59,812 --> 00:08:02,023 - I'm looking at you, Jimmy. [laughs] - [Jimmy laughs] 165 00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:05,067 [Jordan] One of the most interesting things about Cannon Capital is, 166 00:08:05,067 --> 00:08:06,986 even though we're located here in Manhattan, 167 00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:11,824 {\an8}we're best known for our work in China and Japan and South Korea. 168 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:15,995 And so to do business in those time zones, we have to work nights... 169 00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:19,874 [chuckling] ...which makes for some pretty weird hours. 170 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:24,212 Uh, but if you wanna compete in the Asia markets, 171 00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:26,714 you've got to work Asia hours. And we do. 172 00:08:26,714 --> 00:08:28,841 [Colin laughs] That sounds fun. 173 00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:32,386 Yeah. And it's not just the music. Latin jazz has a whole culture. 174 00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:35,139 The musicians, they always greet each other with hugs 175 00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:37,350 and sometimes they come hug the audience members. 176 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:40,269 There's no such thing as an Irish goodbye at a Latin jazz club. [laughs] 177 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:42,188 Pull over. 178 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,814 Yeah, he's friendly. 179 00:08:43,814 --> 00:08:45,483 I'd say he's a tasty bit of eye candy. 180 00:08:45,483 --> 00:08:48,694 I like that he's outgoing and easy to talk to. 181 00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:50,279 It doesn't matter about that. He's just a donkey. 182 00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:52,782 - Well. - I'm not wild about his infatuation 183 00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:56,369 with Latin jazz, but I can find that area of the brain and just eliminate it. 184 00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,080 - How do you do that? - Just get an ice pick and wiggle it about. 185 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:00,122 Hmm. 186 00:09:00,122 --> 00:09:01,374 - Let's get home. - Hello. 187 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,793 Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill, can I have a word? 188 00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:04,877 Did you fix the flat? 189 00:09:04,877 --> 00:09:07,672 Well, Bill, it's a good-news, bad-news situation. 190 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,424 The good news is, you don't have to pay for the ride. 191 00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:12,343 Okay. What's the bad news? 192 00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:13,970 - Well... - [saw whirring] 193 00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:19,308 Oh, hey. Uh, I can actually take Jordan's mail. 194 00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,644 - Oh, okay. - I'm his assistant, Wendy. [chuckles] 195 00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:22,770 Oh, hey, Wendy. I'm Guillermo. 196 00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,021 - Nice to meet you. - Yeah. 197 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:27,149 - You know, I started in the mail room too. - Oh, really? 198 00:09:27,149 --> 00:09:29,610 [Nadja] Guillermo must excel at this new job 199 00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:31,988 {\an8}because if it doesn't go as smoothly as he hopes, 200 00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:34,907 {\an8}that little bouncing bitch will blame us for his failings, 201 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,784 and then he will kill us. 202 00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:38,661 After that, it was just knowing what Jordan wants 203 00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,663 before he knows what he wants, so... [laughs] 204 00:09:40,663 --> 00:09:42,415 Wow, it's pretty good advice. 205 00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:44,000 [Nadja] Someone needed to take action, 206 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:47,295 and that someone, as usual, is me. 207 00:09:47,295 --> 00:09:49,589 I was kind of an assistant myself for a little bit. 208 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:53,593 I mean, not for a little bit. For a while. But, you know, it's always weird to like... 209 00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:56,304 Wow, she is quick. [chuckles] 210 00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:58,180 Also, I needed a new project. 211 00:09:58,180 --> 00:10:00,891 And now I get to try out my regular human behavior. 212 00:10:00,891 --> 00:10:05,146 [clears throat] Since switching to medium roast, I'm sleepin' so much better. 213 00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:06,480 Uncanny! 214 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:07,815 Wendy took off again. 215 00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:12,486 So, it would be great if I could get you to hop on to Jordan's desk. 216 00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:15,239 Wow. Really? 217 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:18,993 So, it turns out that the finance world is a lot easier than Panera Bread. 218 00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:24,582 I guess the powers that be heard that I was absolutely crushing it... [laughs] 219 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:28,002 ...in the mail room, and now I'm an assistant. 220 00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:30,671 Since the time of the great philosophers, 221 00:10:30,671 --> 00:10:34,342 man has dreamed of bringing life to a lifeless vessel. 222 00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:37,178 - Spitting in the face of his creator... - Spits. Mm-hmm. 223 00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:39,805 - ...thus becoming a creator himself. - [Colin] Mm-hmm. 224 00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,265 Which brings me to alchemy. 225 00:10:41,265 --> 00:10:43,184 Yeah, yeah. [stammers] Just flip the switch. 226 00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:55,696 - Here. Oh. - [grunting] 227 00:10:55,696 --> 00:10:57,615 He's just a little excited. 228 00:10:57,615 --> 00:11:02,286 [grunting] Pain too much. Kill me. 229 00:11:02,286 --> 00:11:03,412 [grunts] Flip the switch! 230 00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:04,997 Don't be hasty. Let's hear him out. 231 00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:08,042 Flip the fucking switch, Colin Robinson! 232 00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:11,212 Huh? I... It's hard to hear with everything going. 233 00:11:11,212 --> 00:11:13,005 - Do you want me to flip the... - [choking] 234 00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:14,173 [Lazlo] Yeah! 235 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,508 Oh. 236 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:17,093 Sorry, I couldn't... I just couldn't hear. 237 00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:20,096 That was amazing. Moving around and everything. 238 00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:23,307 Now I remember why I've abandoned this project. 239 00:11:23,307 --> 00:11:26,310 The sudden jolt of total consciousness is too much, 240 00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:28,187 even for the dullest of brutes. 241 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:31,357 And the creature's response to such a sensory overload is violence. 242 00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:33,317 Pity. 243 00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:35,736 W-What are you... No, Laszlo, don't. 244 00:11:35,736 --> 00:11:38,364 This is not a conversation, Colin Robinson. 245 00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:41,742 This creature will destroy us, so we must destroy it first. 246 00:11:41,742 --> 00:11:46,831 Sometimes a scientist must admit defeat. Them's are the breaks. 247 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:57,299 Uh, what else? We got Adrian Bellamy from the Essex Funds coming in later today. 248 00:11:57,299 --> 00:11:58,926 You ready to reel in that whale, Ryan? 249 00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:01,345 - You know it, baby. - You set 'em up, I knock 'em down. 250 00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:02,930 - [imitates gun firing] - [imitates gun firing] 251 00:12:02,930 --> 00:12:05,516 Here's the deal with Bellamy. He's very particular. 252 00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:07,226 - Copy. - I want everybody in this room 253 00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:08,310 to be on their A game. 254 00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:09,395 - Of course. - Yeah. 255 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,606 {\an8}If we do not want Guillermo to crack, 256 00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:16,527 {\an8}then his progress in the human world must be monitored. 257 00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:19,321 So someone needed to take action. 258 00:12:19,321 --> 00:12:22,908 And as usual, that someone is me. 259 00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:24,577 So, let's just show 'em a lot of attention. 260 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:25,745 You got it. 261 00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,539 I have to... I have to go. Sorry. Excuse me. 262 00:12:30,791 --> 00:12:32,168 [stammers] Doesn't matter. 263 00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:36,964 [whispers] Nandor, what the hell are you doing here? 264 00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:41,051 I am patrolling for spills. Such is my janitorial duty. 265 00:12:41,051 --> 00:12:43,679 [whispers] This is my life and my job. You can't be here. 266 00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:47,850 But I am an employee of Cannon Capital now, which makes us coworkers. 267 00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:48,934 Excuse me. 268 00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:52,104 [chuckles] You know, the only time I set the bar as low as you, Gary, 269 00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,981 is for limbo. [laughs] 270 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:55,065 - You kill me. - Okay. Okay. 271 00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:57,109 Mmm. Mama's go-go juice. [laughs] 272 00:12:58,235 --> 00:12:59,612 [Nandor] Nadja? 273 00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,948 - Oh, shit. - You're here too. 274 00:13:02,948 --> 00:13:04,742 [whispers] Someone needed to keep a close eye on you. 275 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,952 Yes, that was my thinking also. 276 00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:08,120 What a merry mix-up. 277 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,039 Spill o'clock. Excuse me. 278 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:14,335 So you could pick any job, Nandor, and you went with janitor. 279 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:16,337 Yes. What's wrong with that? 280 00:13:16,337 --> 00:13:21,050 There are many things I've learned as a janitor at Cannon Capital. 281 00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:26,305 [Nandor] The key to making money on Wall Street is keeping a tidy office. 282 00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:32,937 Also make a mental note of everything you throw away in case anyone needs it later. 283 00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:34,772 There's nothing wrong with being a janitor. 284 00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:37,024 I get to wander the corridors freely. 285 00:13:37,024 --> 00:13:39,485 Everyone loves greeting Jan-Dee. 286 00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:41,821 I'm gonna ask you both... No, I'm gonna tell you. 287 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:45,866 Go back to Staten Island because I just recently got a big promotion 288 00:13:45,866 --> 00:13:47,743 and I can't have you two messing it up. 289 00:13:47,743 --> 00:13:50,579 Hmm. I wonder how you got that big promotion 290 00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:53,916 straight from the mail room to Jordan's desk 291 00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:56,752 just because Wendy stopped showing up. 292 00:13:56,752 --> 00:13:57,837 Huh. 293 00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:00,881 Make no mistake, Guillermo. 294 00:14:00,881 --> 00:14:05,302 Without me, you are the cow that carries the corpses to the burn pit. 295 00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:08,305 With me, you are the prize pig who gets to eat with the mayor 296 00:14:08,305 --> 00:14:10,516 and his big-titted wife. [hisses] 297 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:13,269 Yes. And I have also helped with Guillermo's ascension. 298 00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:15,521 No, you haven't. You clean up shit. 299 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,022 - And piss. - [whispers] Enough. 300 00:14:17,022 --> 00:14:18,691 All right? Enough. Just leave me alone. 301 00:14:18,691 --> 00:14:22,111 I don't need your help to succeed. Leave me alone. 302 00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:23,571 - Ungrateful. - Hey. [stammers] 303 00:14:23,571 --> 00:14:26,448 He is clearly flailing. We need to keep coming here. 304 00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,201 Yes, he needs us now more than ever. 305 00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:34,582 [Colin] I couldn't stop thinking about the Monster. 306 00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:38,002 Laszlo was a little too quick to give up on him. 307 00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:41,380 So I decided to take matters into my own hands. 308 00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:44,842 You'll get what I mean by that joke in a second. 309 00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:47,887 It's really good. Yeah, just wait. 310 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:53,642 I've been doing some independent research, and I've come to the realization 311 00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:58,147 that the Monster's acting up and smashing things 312 00:14:58,147 --> 00:15:02,067 is a result of a faulty body part, 313 00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:05,613 namely, his hand... his hands. 314 00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:09,825 Now you know what I-I meant earlier in my interview 315 00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:12,578 when I said "into my own hands." 316 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:14,788 Uh, the joke I had made. 317 00:15:14,788 --> 00:15:18,876 This guy was a recreational baseball player. 318 00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:20,711 One home run, two doubles and a walk. 319 00:15:20,711 --> 00:15:22,379 What the fuck are you doing? 320 00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:27,217 - Just give me a chance. All right? - That thing is far too dangerous. 321 00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:31,847 It's not perfect, but I can train him. I know I can. 322 00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:35,517 I've learned so much about science just hanging around you. 323 00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:37,186 Another young scientist inspired. 324 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:38,479 First, Mr. Oppenheimer, 325 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:40,522 and now Colin Robinson. 326 00:15:40,522 --> 00:15:43,859 Exactly. I just... I need a little more time. 327 00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:48,155 If it's time you want, then time you shall have. 328 00:15:49,239 --> 00:15:50,908 Phew! [chuckles] 329 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:54,536 I fear this damn fool doesn't understand the dangers or the risks. 330 00:15:54,536 --> 00:15:57,164 But every scientist has gotta learn each lesson for himself. 331 00:15:57,164 --> 00:16:02,711 If he's not careful, I fear this whole thing could turn into a Monster Mash 332 00:16:02,711 --> 00:16:06,090 or worse still, a graveyard smash. 333 00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,592 - [elevator bell dings] - [clears throat] 334 00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:10,719 Welcome, Mr. Bellamy. 335 00:16:10,719 --> 00:16:12,930 - Hey. Uh... - Oh. 336 00:16:12,930 --> 00:16:14,181 Never mind the cameras. 337 00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:16,642 We're just getting some behind-the-scenes videotape for Herb Allen 338 00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,435 for his next conference in the Sun Valley. 339 00:16:18,435 --> 00:16:22,606 Cathy, my love, could you plop Mr. Bellamy in Conference Room A, please? 340 00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:24,400 - Sure. - Thank you very much. 341 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:27,528 Very good. Plop we go. [chuckles] 342 00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:34,660 Ry-Dog, where the hell have you been? Bellamy's here already, man. 343 00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:35,828 These fucking fobs. 344 00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,288 Hey, Bryce. Wanna pause the sudoku and get on this shit? 345 00:16:38,288 --> 00:16:39,623 Yes, sorry. 346 00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:40,958 Untwist your knickers, my love. 347 00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:43,377 Bellamy is on 25, Conference Room B. 348 00:16:43,377 --> 00:16:45,796 - Go up. Hurry. Shoo. - Uh... Yep. 349 00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:48,132 You can do this, Ry-Dog. I believe in you. 350 00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:51,135 [chuckles] This little bitch. 351 00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,512 [Nadja clears throat] 352 00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,890 [whispers] Stop touching things. 353 00:16:56,890 --> 00:16:59,309 Adrian Bellamy, aka the whale. 354 00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:03,105 You have five minutes to learn everything about him 355 00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:06,066 and then meet him in Conference Room A. 356 00:17:06,066 --> 00:17:07,401 [whispers] Don't fuck it up. 357 00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:09,111 - [whispers] Oh, my God. Seriously? - [Nadja] Huh. 358 00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:12,031 Wait. No. I need that. 359 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,369 Take two. 360 00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:20,122 [grunting] 361 00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:23,751 Nice and easy. Easy-breezy. 362 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:27,212 You know, having a secret handshake with a close buddy 363 00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:29,506 has always been a dream of mine. 364 00:17:29,506 --> 00:17:32,134 There, there. All right. 365 00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:33,052 - [grunts] - No. 366 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,178 - Ow. Ow. - [bone cracking] 367 00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:35,471 - Ow. Ow! [grunts] - [grunting] 368 00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:37,389 Ow! [grunts] 369 00:17:38,098 --> 00:17:41,560 Don't worry. It... It hurts worse than it looks. [chuckles] 370 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:43,687 Gotta get back on the horse though. 371 00:17:43,687 --> 00:17:46,315 Giddyap. Whew. Yeehaw! 372 00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:48,525 Hook 'em Horns. Take three. 373 00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:50,486 - [grunts, growls] - [screams] 374 00:17:52,529 --> 00:17:55,365 Mr. Bellamy. I'm sorry. Have you been waiting long? 375 00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:57,159 I am so sorry about that. 376 00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:59,369 Let me, uh... Let me refresh your drink here. 377 00:17:59,369 --> 00:18:03,415 Don't know what's taking Ryan so long. I'm sure he'll be here any minute. 378 00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:09,630 Yeah, I love to get hydrated at work, 379 00:18:09,630 --> 00:18:13,258 especially if I'm gonna get sloshed tonight... 380 00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:16,595 [chuckles] ...at, uh, Zero Bond. 381 00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:19,431 You club? 382 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:23,018 Yeah. Yeah, I love to club. 383 00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:25,729 You can learn a lot from someone's Instagram. 384 00:18:25,729 --> 00:18:29,566 {\an8}Like Mr. Bellamy, he loves partying at Zero Bond. 385 00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:30,859 {\an8}If I'm not clubbing, I'm here. 386 00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:33,695 If I'm here, I'm not clubbing. So I'd rather be clubbing. [chuckles] 387 00:18:33,695 --> 00:18:36,406 {\an8}[Guillermo] Loves commenting on supermodels' posts. 388 00:18:36,907 --> 00:18:38,575 - Total smoke show. - Oh, yeah. 389 00:18:38,575 --> 00:18:41,078 - And she's got the... [swallows] - Yes, sir. 390 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:44,373 Loves the clean lines of the new Rivian. 391 00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:45,916 [both laughing] 392 00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:48,710 And he also, uh, tags his ex-wife in all his kids' pictures 393 00:18:48,710 --> 00:18:50,879 because, you know, they're on good terms. 394 00:18:50,879 --> 00:18:51,839 That's nice. 395 00:18:51,839 --> 00:18:54,591 Next month, you, me and a clay court in Montauk. 396 00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:56,093 You got it. Oh. 397 00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:58,679 Adrian. Hi. How we doing in here? 398 00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:00,764 Good. Excited to see what you got for me. 399 00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:01,849 - Yeah. - Hey. 400 00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:03,475 Hey, he's gonna be in the meeting, yeah? 401 00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:04,685 - Well, I-- - Need at least one guy 402 00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:06,270 who knows what the fuck he's talking about. 403 00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:08,564 [laughing] 404 00:19:09,314 --> 00:19:10,858 All right, whatever you say. 405 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:11,942 - [Bellamy] Good. - You're in. 406 00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:14,153 - [Bellamy] Oh, good. - [Jordan] Sure. 407 00:19:19,616 --> 00:19:21,618 She said, "That's why you're not allowed in the sauna anymore." 408 00:19:21,618 --> 00:19:22,828 [both laughing] 409 00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:25,372 - [Jordan] Good to have you down here, man. - Absolutely. 410 00:19:25,372 --> 00:19:28,083 I'm gonna give you a call tomorrow just to follow up. It's been a real pleasure. 411 00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,127 - Sounds good. G-Man. - Boom. 412 00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:31,378 We gotta get you out to the island too. 413 00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:33,005 - Good. - What was your name again? 414 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,089 - Guillermo. - Guillermo. 415 00:19:34,089 --> 00:19:36,800 Well, congratulations, Guillermo. You've just replaced Ryan. 416 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,386 You're an analyst, bud. The fuck is he anyway? 417 00:19:39,386 --> 00:19:41,805 Hey, Ryan. Where the fuck are you? 418 00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:44,016 Have you guys seen Ryan? The fuck is that guy, right? 419 00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:46,101 [Bryce] I think he's in Conference Room B. 420 00:19:46,101 --> 00:19:47,477 I'm sure he's over here, bud. 421 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:48,854 Oh. 422 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:51,773 - [Jordan] What the-- - Oh, guys, sorry, Ryan here is, um... 423 00:19:51,773 --> 00:19:54,693 Yeah, he's-he's been going hard on the Adderall for a while now. 424 00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:56,195 Hey, you can't use this. All right? 425 00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,863 You do not have my permission to use this footage. 426 00:19:57,863 --> 00:20:00,032 Delete the file if you're watching this. 427 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:03,827 - Ryan. Hey. Wake up, bro. Come on. - Ryan. 428 00:20:03,827 --> 00:20:05,913 - Hey, Jordan, say no more. - Huh? 429 00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:08,999 I will take care of this. I'm on it. I will get rid of Ryan. 430 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,834 Oh, great. Let him down easy, all right? 431 00:20:10,834 --> 00:20:12,586 He's getting married in a couple months. 432 00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:14,254 I will do this now. Not your problem. 433 00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:17,549 Okay. Well, thanks. I like you. 434 00:20:17,549 --> 00:20:19,176 - [Nadja laughs] - [laughs] Yeah. 435 00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:20,260 [Nadja] Oh. 436 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,137 What's not to like? [chuckles] 437 00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:23,931 [whispers] Are you kidding me? 438 00:20:23,931 --> 00:20:25,015 Come on. 439 00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:28,143 Do you know how hard it is to get blood off of unsealed marble? 440 00:20:28,143 --> 00:20:31,396 I'm not hearing the words, um, "thank you." 441 00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:33,315 I told you I don't need your help, all right? 442 00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:34,650 I wanna earn my way up the ladder. 443 00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:39,905 So, I killed some rando with an overpriced MBA so you could get in the room. 444 00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:42,074 Which I didn't ask you to do. I didn't ask you to do that. 445 00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:45,744 But you were the one that impressed the rich large whale, huh? 446 00:20:45,744 --> 00:20:48,121 And Jordan noticed. 447 00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:50,415 - That's kind of true. - See? 448 00:20:50,415 --> 00:20:52,542 Yeah, I was pretty annoyed at first that Nadja 449 00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:56,004 and Nandor completely ignored me and came back to Cannon... 450 00:20:56,004 --> 00:20:57,547 It's better. 451 00:20:57,547 --> 00:21:00,926 ...but I decided to let them stay if they promise no more funny business. 452 00:21:00,926 --> 00:21:02,344 [chuckles] Like murder. 453 00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:03,679 Bye-bye, Ryan. 454 00:21:04,513 --> 00:21:07,391 Going back into the human world can be so overwhelming. 455 00:21:07,975 --> 00:21:09,559 So many things to get used to. 456 00:21:09,559 --> 00:21:13,230 And it's kind of nice to see a familiar face. [chuckles] 457 00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:15,232 Familiar. [chuckles] 458 00:21:16,316 --> 00:21:20,362 "Welcome to the big show." Ed Sullivan. 459 00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:25,742 I think you will be pleasantly surprised by how far the Monster has come. 460 00:21:26,576 --> 00:21:29,121 Uh, Monster, can I have you come out here, please? 461 00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:36,795 Let's get ready to see what the Monster can do now. 462 00:21:36,795 --> 00:21:42,301 Fantastic. Monster, can we have a, uh, friendly introduction out of you? 463 00:21:42,926 --> 00:21:48,557 Friend. Friend. Friend. 464 00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:51,184 - Employer, but very close. - [growls] 465 00:21:51,184 --> 00:21:55,522 Oh, I'd never say I'm on par with Laszlo as a scientist. 466 00:21:55,522 --> 00:22:01,695 But I-I do think I have one quality that the old pistol lacks, 467 00:22:01,695 --> 00:22:03,530 which is patience. 468 00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:06,074 [Latin jazz playing] 469 00:22:06,074 --> 00:22:10,829 [Colin] So, I just took some time and met the Monster where he was at. 470 00:22:10,829 --> 00:22:11,955 - Come on, buddy. - [grunts] 471 00:22:11,955 --> 00:22:16,501 You know, turn down the volume and listen to his tempo, 472 00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:20,922 which happens to be a Latin jazz rhythm. 473 00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:26,553 - That is a book. - Book. 474 00:22:26,553 --> 00:22:28,764 That is a magnifying glass. 475 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:31,266 Magnify. [grunts] 476 00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:34,186 - Uh, doodad. - Doodad. [grunts] 477 00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:37,606 Jar of brains or bull's testicles. 478 00:22:38,899 --> 00:22:40,192 - That's just a light. - [grunts] 479 00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:42,527 - You gotta let them learn by doing. - Light. 480 00:22:42,527 --> 00:22:44,446 - Huh? - That is a Tesla coil. 481 00:22:44,446 --> 00:22:45,781 [groans] 482 00:22:45,781 --> 00:22:47,240 Don't. Yeah. Don't. 483 00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:51,244 Some people say I'm an acquired taste, and, I don't know, 484 00:22:51,244 --> 00:22:54,831 maybe the Monster just needed someone to know that he is too. 485 00:22:54,831 --> 00:22:56,917 - Good job. [chuckles] - [chuckles] 486 00:22:56,917 --> 00:23:00,420 - And now on to the pièce de résistance. - [music stops] 487 00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:04,174 I believe that with time and care, 488 00:23:04,174 --> 00:23:08,678 I have removed the Monster's impulse to harm. 489 00:23:09,805 --> 00:23:10,806 Observe. 490 00:23:12,974 --> 00:23:14,935 Hmm. Now we're getting serious. 491 00:23:14,935 --> 00:23:21,400 The Monster will now delicately hold this mouse gently 492 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,071 in his hand without crushing him. 493 00:23:26,071 --> 00:23:28,281 Protection over pain. 494 00:23:30,784 --> 00:23:33,745 That's a remarkable start, Colin Robinson. 495 00:23:33,745 --> 00:23:35,539 I'll admit I was skeptical, 496 00:23:35,539 --> 00:23:38,125 but you've turned this experiment from shit to champagne, 497 00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:40,460 and yourself into a man of science. 498 00:23:40,460 --> 00:23:43,130 With our combined efforts, we can take this Monster to the top. 499 00:23:43,130 --> 00:23:45,757 So, we can keep him? 500 00:23:45,757 --> 00:23:47,843 - Oh, yes. - Oh. Awesome sauce. 501 00:23:47,843 --> 00:23:49,386 Great work, fellas. Well done. 502 00:23:50,387 --> 00:23:52,013 Oh, don't you do that. [laughs] 503 00:23:52,013 --> 00:23:53,765 I bid you gents good evening. [chuckles] 504 00:23:53,765 --> 00:23:55,183 Good night. 505 00:23:55,183 --> 00:23:59,020 - You did great. [chuckles] - [muffled] Mmm, did great. 506 00:23:59,646 --> 00:24:02,357 - [mutters] - Oh, what's in your mouth? Oh, no. 507 00:24:02,357 --> 00:24:04,609 No, Monster. Out. 508 00:24:05,193 --> 00:24:08,155 Ew. Well, that's okay. Even monsters make mistakes... 509 00:24:08,155 --> 00:24:10,282 No, Monster. Leave it. 510 00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:12,242 - Monster, leave it. - [crunching] 511 00:24:12,242 --> 00:24:14,578 Screw it. A monster can have a mouse as a treat, 512 00:24:14,578 --> 00:24:17,038 but we're not making a habit of it. 513 00:24:17,956 --> 00:24:19,708 [Latin jazz playing]