1 00:00:20,438 --> 00:00:22,064 [Pat] Previously on Shining Vale... 2 00:00:22,231 --> 00:00:23,816 [Valerie] Whatever's plaguing your mother 3 00:00:23,983 --> 00:00:25,860 will eventually come after you. 4 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,987 Wear this medal. It'll offer protection. 5 00:00:28,112 --> 00:00:29,321 [Ryan] My mom always wore hers, 6 00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:31,157 but she wasn't wearing it when she died. 7 00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:32,908 [Sandy] Are you still in touch with your friend Ryan? 8 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,118 [Gaynor] He lives with his cool uncle in L.A. 9 00:00:34,285 --> 00:00:35,286 I might be pregnant. 10 00:00:35,411 --> 00:00:36,495 I'm just focusing on work. 11 00:00:36,662 --> 00:00:38,539 -Fuck off. -I'm Ennio, from Italy. 12 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:41,500 [Nellie] I'm writing a book about how asylums abuse women. 13 00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:42,501 Who are you? 14 00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:43,627 -I'm Nellie. -[gasps] 15 00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,172 I'm Daisy. I used to live here. 16 00:00:46,338 --> 00:00:48,883 -[phone ringing] -[Jake] What the hell? 17 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,385 -[Daisy] Jake... -Oh, boy. 18 00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:54,096 My Leo is an angel. He was stillborn. 19 00:00:54,263 --> 00:00:55,473 I'm the worst mom. 20 00:00:55,598 --> 00:00:57,558 Maybe, but you're a genius writer. 21 00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:59,310 You'll have to come speak at our book club. 22 00:00:59,477 --> 00:01:00,853 [Pat] Sounds great. 23 00:01:01,020 --> 00:01:02,480 -Your dad and I are separating. -Thank fucking Jesus. 24 00:01:02,646 --> 00:01:03,939 I want two Christmases. 25 00:01:04,105 --> 00:01:06,317 I think you're still hooked on your wife. 26 00:01:06,484 --> 00:01:08,944 [Pat] This isn't a fucking dream! 27 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:11,280 [retching] 28 00:01:11,447 --> 00:01:13,199 Oh, no. They got you, too? 29 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:17,328 You're fucking kidding me. 30 00:01:20,122 --> 00:01:23,375 Okay, Roxy, one shit for Mommy. 31 00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:25,169 Let's go. 32 00:01:25,336 --> 00:01:27,463 Okay, not for Mommy. 33 00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,757 One shit for Roxy. 34 00:01:29,924 --> 00:01:33,134 [branches snapping] 35 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:35,513 Hello? 36 00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:37,181 [deer grunting] 37 00:01:37,348 --> 00:01:39,225 Oh... 38 00:01:39,390 --> 00:01:40,684 a deer. 39 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:48,234 [menacing electronic music plays] 40 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:51,402 ♪ ♪♪♪ 41 00:01:54,782 --> 00:01:56,826 [growling] 42 00:02:10,381 --> 00:02:13,217 [deer groaning, flesh tearing] 43 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,388 [Terry] Pat, is that you? 44 00:02:17,555 --> 00:02:19,640 I'm just walking the dog. 45 00:02:21,934 --> 00:02:24,603 Wait. Are you pregnant? 46 00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:27,606 [Pat growling softly] 47 00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:32,027 [gasps] God damn it! 48 00:02:33,571 --> 00:02:36,490 [Roxy howling] 49 00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:40,911 [eerie music plays] 50 00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:43,873 ♪ ♪ 51 00:02:52,965 --> 00:02:54,800 [Joan] Isn't this nice? 52 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:57,928 I wish my mother had gone with me to my abortion. 53 00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:01,098 Yeah. This makes up for all the missed recitals, 54 00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:03,893 games, birthdays, and graduation. 55 00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:05,811 I'm not getting an abortion. 56 00:03:05,978 --> 00:03:07,771 I just had two really weird dreams. 57 00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:09,356 I want to make sure. 58 00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:11,775 Well, whatever you decide to do about the baby, 59 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:14,987 I support you 100%. 60 00:03:15,154 --> 00:03:16,572 But I will say, 61 00:03:16,739 --> 00:03:19,867 having you was the second-best decision I ever made. 62 00:03:20,034 --> 00:03:21,744 Hmm. I'm not gonna ask what the first was. 63 00:03:21,911 --> 00:03:23,662 -Getting my abortion. -Oh, yeah. 64 00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:26,165 Do you how hard it is to find you a Mother's Day card? 65 00:03:26,332 --> 00:03:27,917 Phelps. 66 00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:32,046 Hi. Um, I'm here for a pregnancy test. 67 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,672 Is it for your daughter? 68 00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:36,133 Oh, I'm not her daughter. 69 00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:37,676 No, it's for me. 70 00:03:37,843 --> 00:03:39,845 When was your last period? 71 00:03:40,012 --> 00:03:42,389 -When was the Challenger? -Oh, my God. 72 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:43,891 Can I just take the test, please? 73 00:03:44,058 --> 00:03:46,393 Okay, just have a seat, Gaynor. 74 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,896 Uh, I'm Pat. 75 00:03:49,063 --> 00:03:51,023 Gaynor's my daughter. 76 00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:52,232 [Nancy] Oh, God. 77 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:53,692 I'm sorry. Excuse me. 78 00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:57,488 She probably shouldn't have said that. 79 00:03:57,655 --> 00:04:00,074 Yeah, probably not. 80 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:01,825 I texted you three hours ago. 81 00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:04,912 Well, I don't have to answer to you anymore, sweetheart. 82 00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:06,997 Remember? I'm a free agent. 83 00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:09,208 Plus, I was playing pickleball with Laird. 84 00:04:09,375 --> 00:04:11,502 Can you believe that? I do shit like that now. 85 00:04:11,669 --> 00:04:13,504 I'm playing pickleball out there, Pat. 86 00:04:13,629 --> 00:04:15,798 Best shape of my life. I've scheduled a physical. 87 00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:18,091 Oh, and I, uh, tried spicy Thai food. 88 00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:20,844 And I tried cocaine, and I quit. 89 00:04:21,011 --> 00:04:22,346 My job, not the coke. 90 00:04:22,471 --> 00:04:24,306 I love that little devil's dust. 91 00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:26,767 I think what I'm discovering 92 00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:30,187 is that I love the freedom of having a life 93 00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:33,232 without the burden of family responsibility, you know? 94 00:04:33,399 --> 00:04:35,943 -What's this? -It's a pregnancy test. 95 00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:39,238 -You peed on this? -That's how you use it. 96 00:04:39,405 --> 00:04:42,574 [sighs] Listen, I know this must be a shock to you, 97 00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:45,953 'cause it certainly is to me, but... 98 00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:48,122 You're still focused on the pee stick, aren't you? 99 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:49,707 I'm just thinking of a circumstance 100 00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:52,209 where I would hand you something covered in urine. 101 00:04:52,334 --> 00:04:53,919 I'm fucking pregnant, Terry. 102 00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:56,463 Hey, all right. 103 00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,048 How do we know it's yours? 104 00:04:58,215 --> 00:04:59,550 -What? -[Terry] I don't know. 105 00:04:59,717 --> 00:05:01,468 With all due respect, you're a little old 106 00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:02,720 to be getting pregnant. 107 00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:04,013 Yeah, and you're a little old 108 00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:06,390 to wear bike shorts, but here we are. 109 00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:07,599 All right, don't worry. 110 00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,560 It'll probably take care of itself. 111 00:05:09,727 --> 00:05:11,186 That's a lot to ask of a baby. 112 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,772 I mean, my body will absorb it. 113 00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:15,774 No, no, no, you know, let's think about this. 114 00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:19,903 Maybe, uh--maybe we don't want to absorb it, you know? 115 00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:23,115 -Maybe we should do this thing. -[Pat] Really? 116 00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:25,951 Because about ten seconds ago, 117 00:05:26,076 --> 00:05:27,494 all you could talk about was doing blow 118 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,621 and playing "pickleboard" with Laird. 119 00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:30,956 It's called pickleball. 120 00:05:31,123 --> 00:05:32,416 It's America's fastest-growing sport. 121 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:33,834 I mean, think about it. 122 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:36,295 I'm out there trying to find out who I am. 123 00:05:36,462 --> 00:05:38,005 Maybe I'm supposed to be a parent. 124 00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:39,590 You are a parent. 125 00:05:39,757 --> 00:05:42,760 [Terry] Well, I mean of a--of a new one, you know? 126 00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:46,889 Wouldn't you like the idea of, you know, having a little baby 127 00:05:47,056 --> 00:05:48,932 that looks like me and you. 128 00:05:49,099 --> 00:05:51,185 Don't have to imagine. We have two. 129 00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:54,146 -[Terry] Mm. -And they were so adorable. 130 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:55,773 But now they're teenagers. 131 00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:59,276 Yeah, well, we'll be dead by then for that one. 132 00:05:59,443 --> 00:06:00,611 [chuckles] 133 00:06:00,778 --> 00:06:02,154 And, look, we get all the good parts, 134 00:06:02,321 --> 00:06:03,655 and then we leave. 135 00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:08,452 All right, well, don't get too attached to the idea, 136 00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:12,372 because it probably won't get too attached to my uterus. 137 00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:13,707 Well, if you don't mind, 138 00:06:13,832 --> 00:06:15,793 I'd like to stick around and find out. 139 00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:17,503 You know, if we're gonna be a family, 140 00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:22,132 I think it's important for both of us to be around. 141 00:06:22,299 --> 00:06:24,093 Come on, let's tell the kids. 142 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,013 No fucking way. You promised us you were getting a divorce. 143 00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:29,807 Does this mean that we're not getting two Christmases? 144 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:31,225 Sweetie, that was never gonna happen. 145 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,810 I don't think we were gonna do that. 146 00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:33,977 Why would you go back on the one good thing 147 00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:35,437 you've done for this family? 148 00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:36,897 Why would you promise a second Christmas? 149 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:38,857 You know how much I love first Christmas! 150 00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:41,485 Because your father and I want to try to make it work. 151 00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:43,403 -And your mom's pregnant. -Ugh! 152 00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:44,905 -Oh, Terry. -How did that even happen? 153 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,865 We had unprotected intercourse. 154 00:06:47,032 --> 00:06:48,700 -[Pat] Oh, my God. -Well, it's true. 155 00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:50,536 Okay, how is it even possible? You're old. 156 00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:52,913 -People my age can have babies. -In the Bible. 157 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:54,957 You're gonna be dead by the time the baby is four. 158 00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,875 -That's the plan. -From your lips to God's ears. 159 00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,293 It's not even gonna be a baby. 160 00:06:58,460 --> 00:06:59,920 I mean, it's gonna be a sponge with teeth, 161 00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:01,171 and I'm not gonna clean out its tubes and water it. 162 00:07:01,338 --> 00:07:03,382 Honey, we're a family. 163 00:07:03,549 --> 00:07:05,425 -We're all gonna water it. -[scoffs] 164 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:07,177 You're just trying to save your failed marriage 165 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:08,679 by having a baby you're gonna have to carry around 166 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:10,722 in a ladle. 167 00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,850 You're so selfish. 168 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,229 Who wouldn't want more of those? 169 00:07:17,396 --> 00:07:18,272 -I don't know. -Yeah. 170 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,607 I'll go talk to her. 171 00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,734 [knock at door] 172 00:07:24,570 --> 00:07:27,197 Hey. 173 00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,116 I haven't talked to you in a while. 174 00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:31,285 I know. Thank you. 175 00:07:34,580 --> 00:07:38,667 I was thinking about your friend Ryan. 176 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:41,128 If you ever want to talk 177 00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:44,214 about anything that happened with him, 178 00:07:44,381 --> 00:07:47,301 I'm always here. 179 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,636 I'm good. 180 00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:53,765 Oh, you literally meant always here. 181 00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,642 Gaynor... 182 00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:57,186 Hey. 183 00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:02,274 I want you know that I would never judge you 184 00:08:02,441 --> 00:08:04,109 for anything that you had to do 185 00:08:04,276 --> 00:08:07,196 to get through these last few months. 186 00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:11,950 I'm incredibly proud of how strong you are. 187 00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:14,953 [soft music plays] 188 00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:17,873 -All jokes aside... -[groans] 189 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:21,168 ...if I really had this baby, I promise you, 190 00:08:21,335 --> 00:08:25,214 I will not love it any more than I love you. 191 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:28,300 ♪ ♪ 192 00:08:31,303 --> 00:08:32,721 Mom? 193 00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:37,308 Yeah, sweetie? 194 00:08:37,476 --> 00:08:39,477 I bet you will love the baby more 195 00:08:39,645 --> 00:08:41,313 because it will help with the dishes. 196 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:45,525 Because it'll be a sponge or because it'll have eight arms? 197 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:47,611 Both. 198 00:08:47,778 --> 00:08:48,904 Cool. 199 00:08:49,071 --> 00:08:51,907 [strange light music plays] 200 00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:54,993 ♪ ♪ 201 00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:58,705 Book sales are up nationally. And, oh, this is funny. 202 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:02,292 A woman in West Virginia who was reading your book 203 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:04,461 killed her husband with an ax. 204 00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,171 What? How is that funny? 205 00:09:06,296 --> 00:09:07,839 Well, it's more ironic than funny. 206 00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:09,549 I--You know what? I actually think it's funny. 207 00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:10,676 I think you're too close to it. 208 00:09:10,842 --> 00:09:12,052 Anyway, women all over 209 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:13,971 are seeing themselves in Rosemary. 210 00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:15,889 It's like you're saying it's okay 211 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:17,975 for a--an average, middle-aged woman 212 00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:21,019 to go a little crazy, and they're fucking loving it. 213 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,689 A little crazy? She murdered her family. 214 00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:25,482 Well, I think it's a metaphor. 215 00:09:25,649 --> 00:09:27,067 I- I don't know. You're the writer. 216 00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:29,027 Look, it is all perfect timing 217 00:09:29,152 --> 00:09:31,738 for your appearance at the Shining Vale Ladies Book Club. 218 00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:34,491 Yeah, it's also perfect timing for "fat fucking chance." 219 00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:36,827 A woman named Robyn who sounds like if croquet was a person 220 00:09:36,994 --> 00:09:38,370 said you already agreed. 221 00:09:38,537 --> 00:09:41,081 You're gonna listen to Robyn? She's fucking crazy. 222 00:09:41,248 --> 00:09:43,208 Well, book clubs are big business, baby. 223 00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:45,294 I think it's great press 224 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,587 to get a picture of you doing one in your hometown. 225 00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,006 So think about it. 226 00:09:49,172 --> 00:09:50,590 And then do it, 'cause it's tomorrow. 227 00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,509 Oh, fine. All right, hold on one second. 228 00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:54,511 I got to talk to this little girl. 229 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:56,847 Hi, sweetie. Oh, my goodness. 230 00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:59,224 Look how cute you are. [chuckles] 231 00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:01,601 Um, can I get, uh, a shortbread, 232 00:10:01,727 --> 00:10:04,354 a peanut butter, um, another peanut butter. 233 00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,523 -Say thank you, Chrissie. -Thank you! 234 00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,358 Okay. Not so fast, Chrissie. 235 00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:11,320 I also want, uh, four mint chocolates. 236 00:10:13,155 --> 00:10:14,364 Okay, I'm done. 237 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:16,199 Are we shopping for the apocalypse? 238 00:10:16,366 --> 00:10:17,409 I'm pregnant. 239 00:10:17,576 --> 00:10:20,037 Holy fuck! 240 00:10:20,203 --> 00:10:21,872 Sorry, Chrissie. 241 00:10:22,039 --> 00:10:23,290 Are you sure? 242 00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:25,042 'Cause two years ago, my grandmother thought 243 00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,044 that she was pregnant, and it was really an impacted shit. 244 00:10:27,169 --> 00:10:29,796 I thought it was, too, but I am pregnant, 245 00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,799 and the only people who know are you, Terry, and the kids. 246 00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:34,885 -Well, how'd they take it? -[Pat] Thanks. 247 00:10:35,052 --> 00:10:38,180 Well, Terry was excited, Gaynor's mean, 248 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:40,015 and Jake is Jake, you know. 249 00:10:40,182 --> 00:10:43,477 He's easy. I never have to worry about him. 250 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:46,396 [rock music playing] 251 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,773 ♪ ♪♪♪ 252 00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:49,232 Ahh. 253 00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:51,485 I'm telling you-- that thing was ringing. 254 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,320 And that wall just opened up out of nowhere. 255 00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:54,613 [Roxy barks] 256 00:10:54,780 --> 00:10:56,406 It hasn't done that before or since. 257 00:10:56,573 --> 00:10:58,325 [Roxy barks, growls] 258 00:10:58,492 --> 00:11:00,035 Sorry, girl. 259 00:11:00,202 --> 00:11:02,162 I just don't think it's happening. 260 00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:08,752 [phone ringing] 261 00:11:08,919 --> 00:11:11,838 [suspenseful music plays] 262 00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,090 ♪ ♪ 263 00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:14,424 [indistinct whispering] 264 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:16,426 I told you! 265 00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:17,761 [Roxy barks] 266 00:11:17,928 --> 00:11:19,346 [Jake] Roxy! 267 00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:21,598 Roxy! 268 00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:24,601 ♪ ♪ 269 00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:27,479 [wind howling] 270 00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:30,023 Roxy. 271 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,191 [door slams] 272 00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:34,820 [wind howling] 273 00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:41,493 Oh, no way, perv. 274 00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:44,663 [doorbell rings] 275 00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:50,419 Okay, if you're here to stalk me, 276 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:52,295 you should know I come from a long line of insane women 277 00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:54,131 who chop up men and get away with it. 278 00:11:54,297 --> 00:11:55,549 [Ennio] Gaynor. 279 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,135 It's nice to see you again. 280 00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:00,303 Hey, did you know the Valerie "Hee"? 281 00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:02,389 Okay, it's pronounced Valerie He, 282 00:12:02,514 --> 00:12:04,808 and, uh, no, I've never heard of her. 283 00:12:04,975 --> 00:12:07,310 You wear medals just like hers. 284 00:12:07,477 --> 00:12:08,520 All right. Are you a cop? 285 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:10,480 [speaks Italian] No. 286 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,315 I am exorcist. 287 00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:15,444 [bell tolls ominously] 288 00:12:20,866 --> 00:12:22,534 Okay, come in. 289 00:12:22,701 --> 00:12:23,952 [Ennio] Grazie. 290 00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:26,997 [bluesy music plays] 291 00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:29,249 You've had a remarkable recovery, Terry. 292 00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:31,001 I'll see you in six months. 293 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:32,752 Actually, there is one thing I'm a little concerned about. 294 00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:35,046 That's not cocaine. I had a sesame bagel this morning. 295 00:12:35,213 --> 00:12:37,424 [chuckles] It's this right here. 296 00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:39,050 The O? 297 00:12:39,176 --> 00:12:41,386 I think it's a blood type, Doctor. [chuckles] 298 00:12:41,511 --> 00:12:43,513 That's your testosterone. It's a zero. 299 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,432 What? What does that mean? 300 00:12:45,599 --> 00:12:47,100 It means... [sighs] 301 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,186 ...on paper, you're a woman. 302 00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:50,729 Well, just run it again. 303 00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:52,898 I think all the cocaine's messing with my numbers. 304 00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,900 The good news is, it's extremely treatable. 305 00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:56,693 There's a testosterone cream that's popular, 306 00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:58,361 but in your case, I'd recommend 307 00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:00,572 a rigorous regimen of injections. 308 00:13:00,739 --> 00:13:02,407 -And I'd start yesterday. -[Terry] Yeah. 309 00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:05,702 Well, this is bullshit, okay? 'Cause I'm fine. 310 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:07,037 I'm fine, motherfucker! 311 00:13:07,204 --> 00:13:08,872 I got a baby coming, and I got a beard. 312 00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:12,667 And Mrs. Phelps is knocked up. She's fucking pregnant. 313 00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,920 It's up to you, but if left untreated, 314 00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:16,963 you can expect bone loss, decreased muscle mass, 315 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,882 hot flashes, depression, 316 00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:20,217 even breast growth. 317 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,968 You can always get a second opinion. 318 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,386 You want a second opinion? 319 00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:25,514 How about you talk to my wife's vagina? 320 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,478 What are you fucking looking at? 321 00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:34,314 -[wind howling ominously] -Roxy! 322 00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:45,033 [light buzzing] 323 00:13:46,785 --> 00:13:50,330 [squelching] 324 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,251 Ugh! 325 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:57,087 -[rat squeaking] -[gasps, grunts] 326 00:13:57,254 --> 00:13:58,171 Sorry, rat. 327 00:13:58,338 --> 00:13:59,965 Ooh. 328 00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:03,093 Roxy, where are you? 329 00:14:03,260 --> 00:14:06,137 [suspenseful music plays] 330 00:14:06,304 --> 00:14:08,557 [Roxy whimpers] 331 00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:14,813 I met Ryan at chastity club, 332 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:18,024 and me being me, I stupidly had unprotected sex with him. 333 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:19,317 So, while he goes to move in 334 00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:21,111 with his really cool uncle in L.A., 335 00:14:21,278 --> 00:14:22,654 I'm stuck here dealing with this shitshow. 336 00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:24,948 Wait. Uh, sorry, what did you ask me? 337 00:14:25,115 --> 00:14:26,157 [Ennio] Um... 338 00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:28,535 I ask if you like steamed milk. 339 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:29,703 Ah. [chuckles] 340 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,122 This is a special cappuccino. 341 00:14:32,289 --> 00:14:35,208 If you no like, you get your money back. 342 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:36,793 [stammers] 343 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:39,838 Look, I-I work in a coffee shop, so... 344 00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:42,299 -Christ, that's really good. -I have a magic touch. 345 00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:44,718 And we have the same coffee machine in Italy. 346 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:46,261 -It's a very good one. -Oh, yeah. 347 00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:48,471 My dad stole that from the guy my mom boned. 348 00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:51,891 [chuckles] You are funny, Gaynor. 349 00:14:52,058 --> 00:14:55,478 Listen, um... 350 00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:57,689 I came here because the Valerie He 351 00:14:57,856 --> 00:15:00,859 sent a lot of letters to the Vatican about this house. 352 00:15:01,026 --> 00:15:04,321 She believed there is, um... 353 00:15:04,487 --> 00:15:06,531 a demon living here. 354 00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:09,743 Oh, yeah. She's not home right now. 355 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,453 Then I'll come back another day. 356 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:12,662 Or night. 357 00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:15,540 Uh, day, um, is probably better. 358 00:15:15,707 --> 00:15:17,125 -Whatever... -[chuckles] 359 00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:22,339 You have, uh... 360 00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:25,300 [light music plays] 361 00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:27,594 [Gaynor chuckles] 362 00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,722 ♪ ♪ 363 00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:35,852 [chuckles] Eh, I will go now. 364 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,730 Ciao, Gaynor. 365 00:15:40,398 --> 00:15:42,233 [footsteps departing] 366 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,694 Yeah, I have a type. 367 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:47,572 [light buzzing] 368 00:15:47,739 --> 00:15:49,741 [suspenseful music plays] 369 00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:52,327 What the H is this place? 370 00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:54,287 [baby cries] 371 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:57,415 ♪ ♪ 372 00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:00,293 Whoa. 373 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,337 Daisy. 374 00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:05,340 ♪ ♪ 375 00:16:05,507 --> 00:16:07,509 Whoa. 376 00:16:07,676 --> 00:16:09,219 Boobs. [chuckles] 377 00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:10,720 [Robyn] We are so lucky 378 00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:13,139 to have the author of this month's book, 379 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,266 Rosemary's Revenge. 380 00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:16,393 Hi, Pat. 381 00:16:16,559 --> 00:16:18,144 Hi, Robyn. 382 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:19,604 -And ladies. -[all] Mm-hmm. 383 00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:21,398 Okay, so who's gonna be first? 384 00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:24,442 Mrs. Stephen Edwards. 385 00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:27,821 Well, I loved page four. 386 00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:29,155 [Robyn chuckles] 387 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,282 [Emily] Page four was great, 388 00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:34,160 but page 13 really hit the spot. 389 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,746 Did anyone actually read the book? 390 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:38,248 [woman clears throat] 391 00:16:38,415 --> 00:16:39,833 I read it. 392 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,543 And then I read it again. 393 00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:43,086 Oh, good. 394 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,505 And again. 395 00:16:45,672 --> 00:16:47,382 And I fucking loved it. 396 00:16:47,549 --> 00:16:49,426 Oh, thank you, Principal Woodcock, 397 00:16:49,592 --> 00:16:51,636 for your passionate endorsement. 398 00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:54,139 No, thank you. 399 00:16:54,264 --> 00:16:57,267 Yeah, put this directly in my veins. 400 00:16:57,434 --> 00:16:59,185 So visceral. 401 00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:01,104 It's like you were inside me. 402 00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:03,189 Okay, why don't you settle down, Sandy? 403 00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:06,608 Why don't you fuck off, Robyn? 404 00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:08,778 I didn't jump up your asshole when you lost your dick 405 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:11,614 to that book about the singing crawfish last year! 406 00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:13,782 -Oh. -Okay, wine break. 407 00:17:13,907 --> 00:17:16,286 -Oh, yay. -[Robyn] Yeah. 408 00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:18,621 I really am a big-- huge fan of yours. 409 00:17:18,788 --> 00:17:20,874 -I can tell. -Okay. 410 00:17:20,999 --> 00:17:22,459 [whispering] I'm so sorry. 411 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,169 [normal voice] I mean, she actually reads the book. 412 00:17:24,335 --> 00:17:26,838 Okay, I just--I need a quick picture for my editor, 413 00:17:27,005 --> 00:17:28,673 and I've got to get out-- I don't feel good. 414 00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:31,301 I mean, you have to have a glass of Chardonnay at least. 415 00:17:31,468 --> 00:17:34,137 -It's a book club. -Yeah, I'm not drinking. 416 00:17:34,304 --> 00:17:35,221 -Sushi? -No. 417 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:36,389 -Soft cheese? -I can't. 418 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:37,682 -Oysters? -Pass. 419 00:17:37,849 --> 00:17:38,975 -Cigarette? -I wish. [chuckles] 420 00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:40,560 -Chardonnay? -You're on a loop. 421 00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:42,187 [chuckles] 422 00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:43,980 The truth is, I am pregnant, 423 00:17:44,147 --> 00:17:46,149 and please, please don't say anything. 424 00:17:46,316 --> 00:17:47,817 Oh, Pat! 425 00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:51,279 Congratulations! Congratulations! 426 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,740 [gasps] You have to see Dr. Skapoli. 427 00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:55,158 We all use him. 428 00:17:55,325 --> 00:17:56,743 Oh, Dr. Skapoli? 429 00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,204 -Oh, yum. I love that man. -[Robyn giggles] 430 00:17:59,370 --> 00:18:02,624 You know, I actually trim up my hoo-ha before I go see him. 431 00:18:02,791 --> 00:18:04,751 Okay, Mrs. Stephen Edwards. Ugh! 432 00:18:04,918 --> 00:18:06,336 Is someone pregnant? 433 00:18:06,503 --> 00:18:09,422 -[Robyn] Pat's pregnant! -[all cheering] 434 00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:11,424 -We are so excited for you! -Congratulations! 435 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:12,967 -That's amazing! -Oh, my God. 436 00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,427 -You're really glowing! -We love you! 437 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:17,514 -We'll be there for you. -You're so beautiful. 438 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,641 [indistinct chatter] 439 00:18:19,766 --> 00:18:22,060 Can everyone just shut the fuck up? 440 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:25,021 I'm sorry. 441 00:18:25,188 --> 00:18:26,773 I just want a picture. 442 00:18:26,940 --> 00:18:29,400 -Ooh, that's a great idea. -Oh, that's a great idea. 443 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:30,944 [indistinct chatter] 444 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,695 [Woodcock] I need to be in the front. 445 00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:36,032 You suck as a parent, but you are my fucking hero. 446 00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:39,953 [whispering] I wish I was that baby inside you. 447 00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,538 -Okay. -[camera shutter clicks] 448 00:18:41,704 --> 00:18:43,957 [all cheering] 449 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:47,085 [overlapping chatter] 450 00:18:47,252 --> 00:18:48,711 [Pat] What the fuck? 451 00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:51,130 [camera shutter clicks, camera whirs] 452 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:54,551 [Gaynor] So, uh, what exactly are you looking for? 453 00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:57,762 This, that, vapors... 454 00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:00,306 demon-y stuffs. 455 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,641 Wait. 456 00:19:03,351 --> 00:19:04,811 Don't move. 457 00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:10,483 [camera shutter clicks, camera whirs] 458 00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:11,484 Bella. 459 00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:12,652 Jerk, you scared me. 460 00:19:12,777 --> 00:19:14,070 -Give me that. -No, no. 461 00:19:14,237 --> 00:19:16,072 -[Gaynor] Stop. Ow. -[Ennio chuckles] 462 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:19,492 [Gaynor laughing] Wait. No fair. 463 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:22,412 Hey. 464 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,622 -What happens here? -That's up to you. 465 00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:28,585 No, I mean this bar. 466 00:19:28,751 --> 00:19:29,961 It feels cold. 467 00:19:30,128 --> 00:19:32,422 Ah, it's probably the ice and shit, hmm. 468 00:19:32,589 --> 00:19:36,009 [camera shutter clicks, camera whirs] 469 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:38,219 Okay. 470 00:19:38,386 --> 00:19:39,679 All done. 471 00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:42,473 Don't you have to, like, bless it or something? 472 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,018 No, I will send this to the Vatican, 473 00:19:45,143 --> 00:19:47,061 except for this one. 474 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:49,898 This I keep for good luck. 475 00:19:50,064 --> 00:19:51,441 Shut the fuck up. 476 00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:53,860 -[Ennio chuckles softly] -Wait. Okay. 477 00:19:54,027 --> 00:19:55,904 I'm gonna take one of you. 478 00:20:00,158 --> 00:20:02,160 -[chuckles] -[camera shutter clicks] 479 00:20:02,327 --> 00:20:04,954 [dramatic music plays] 480 00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:08,082 ♪ ♪ 481 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,002 I go now. 482 00:20:11,169 --> 00:20:14,088 Listen, if you feel or you see anything weird, 483 00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,549 you call me, yes? 484 00:20:16,674 --> 00:20:17,926 Yes. 485 00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:21,262 Okay. 486 00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:24,807 [sighs] 487 00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:27,936 ♪ ♪ 488 00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,818 Ciao, bella. 489 00:20:35,985 --> 00:20:38,947 ♪ ♪ 490 00:20:39,989 --> 00:20:41,157 -[squelching] -Oh, God damn, 491 00:20:41,324 --> 00:20:42,825 that's a hot exorcist. 492 00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:45,995 -[squelching] -Huh? 493 00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:48,122 Ugh! 494 00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:50,208 [knock at door] 495 00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:52,460 A little stork told me you're expecting. 496 00:20:52,627 --> 00:20:55,004 -[Ruth chuckles] -Wow, that got around quick. 497 00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:57,173 I brought you some of Leo's things-- 498 00:20:57,340 --> 00:21:00,385 Diapers, onesies... 499 00:21:00,551 --> 00:21:02,428 and shoes--never worn. 500 00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,013 [Pat] You kept everything? 501 00:21:04,180 --> 00:21:08,059 Well, you can only bury 'em in one outfit, right? 502 00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:09,352 -Yep. -[Ruth] So... 503 00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:10,895 you got a good OB-GYN? 504 00:21:11,062 --> 00:21:13,314 I hear Dr. Skapoli is amazing. 505 00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:15,900 Yep, he seems like the go-to guy in Shining Vale, 506 00:21:16,067 --> 00:21:17,568 but I see Dr. Bellamy in Manhattan. 507 00:21:17,735 --> 00:21:19,237 Bellamy? I never heard of him. 508 00:21:19,404 --> 00:21:20,863 You sure you don't mean Schwartz? 509 00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:23,282 No, it's Dr. Bellamy. He delivered both my kids. 510 00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:24,909 Well, that's ancient history. 511 00:21:25,076 --> 00:21:27,286 When was the last time you had your hoo-ha checked? 512 00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:29,497 I don't know, but it wasn't that long ago. 513 00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:31,040 Your biscuit is not my business, 514 00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:32,750 but that being said, 515 00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,211 I will not leave until you make an appointment. 516 00:21:35,378 --> 00:21:37,547 Okay, fine. 517 00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:39,257 [line trilling] 518 00:21:39,424 --> 00:21:41,551 Hi. Uh, I'd like to make an appointment 519 00:21:41,718 --> 00:21:44,554 with Dr. Bellamy uh, for early next week, if that's possible. 520 00:21:44,721 --> 00:21:46,848 This is Pat Phelps. 521 00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:48,725 What? When? 522 00:21:48,891 --> 00:21:50,643 [light music plays] 523 00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:53,312 Okay. Um, yeah, you too. 524 00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:55,148 Thank you. 525 00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:56,566 He died seven years ago. 526 00:21:56,733 --> 00:21:58,317 Well, that's great. It's settled, then. 527 00:21:58,484 --> 00:22:00,737 We'll set you up with Dr. Skapoli. 528 00:22:00,903 --> 00:22:04,574 You know, I got a great feeling about this baby, 529 00:22:04,741 --> 00:22:07,660 and I've never been wrong. 530 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:09,078 Except once. [chuckles] 531 00:22:09,245 --> 00:22:11,414 I'm so sorry you're not a mom. 532 00:22:11,581 --> 00:22:14,000 You know, it doesn't seem fair that someone like me 533 00:22:14,167 --> 00:22:17,545 could possibly have a third and you've never had a shot. 534 00:22:17,712 --> 00:22:20,131 One thing I know-- anyone who is as critical 535 00:22:20,298 --> 00:22:22,925 of her maternal skills as you are is a damn great mom. 536 00:22:23,051 --> 00:22:25,928 Then I must be the best 'cause I am the fucking worst. 537 00:22:26,095 --> 00:22:27,513 Uh-uh. 538 00:22:27,638 --> 00:22:29,807 I love you. 539 00:22:29,974 --> 00:22:34,312 Other people, they see me maybe as some kind of kook. 540 00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:37,982 You let me in, and that means the world to me. 541 00:22:38,149 --> 00:22:41,069 So I'll just give-- Uh... 542 00:22:41,194 --> 00:22:42,695 So... 543 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:46,115 make sure you call Skapoli. 544 00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:48,326 I love you. 545 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:52,705 -That is one kooky bitch. -[Roxy whimpers] 546 00:22:52,872 --> 00:22:54,999 Come here, baby. Come here. Ooh. 547 00:22:55,166 --> 00:22:56,959 Why are you so dirty? 548 00:22:57,126 --> 00:22:59,212 -[Jake] Mom? -Yeah. 549 00:22:59,378 --> 00:23:00,880 I'll--I'll be right there. 550 00:23:02,465 --> 00:23:03,925 [Jake] Mom! 551 00:23:06,177 --> 00:23:08,304 [Terry] Pat, I think I got man tits. 552 00:23:08,471 --> 00:23:09,555 [Pat retching] 553 00:23:09,722 --> 00:23:11,891 Well, I'm disgusted by it, too. 554 00:23:12,016 --> 00:23:13,643 I got an ass. I-- 555 00:23:13,810 --> 00:23:17,146 My features are so soft. 556 00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:18,940 I think this makes you a lesbian. 557 00:23:19,107 --> 00:23:20,817 -[Pat retching] -Really? 558 00:23:20,983 --> 00:23:22,902 That's supposed to be kind of in these days, you know? 559 00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:24,529 -[toilet flushing] -[Pat] Ahh. 560 00:23:24,695 --> 00:23:26,322 [Terry] Oh, God. 561 00:23:26,489 --> 00:23:27,824 [Pat] Uh, I'm sorry. 562 00:23:27,990 --> 00:23:29,325 [clears throat] 563 00:23:29,492 --> 00:23:31,327 What were you saying? I-I couldn't hear you. 564 00:23:31,494 --> 00:23:32,870 Can you open this for me? 565 00:23:33,037 --> 00:23:35,248 I literally lost the gap between my thigh and my ass. 566 00:23:35,373 --> 00:23:36,999 It's like a big flap. 567 00:23:37,166 --> 00:23:39,544 Oh, my God, Terry. Just take the testosterone. 568 00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,671 Yeah, it was one thing to do a bunch of coke, 569 00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:43,798 but do I really want to put a bunch of... 570 00:23:43,965 --> 00:23:45,424 weird chemicals in my body? 571 00:23:45,591 --> 00:23:46,884 -God damn it. -[Pat sighs] 572 00:23:47,051 --> 00:23:49,095 Well, you're talking to the wrong person. 573 00:23:49,220 --> 00:23:51,556 [Terry] Maybe I'm too old to be a dad. 574 00:23:51,722 --> 00:23:52,932 [grunts, scoffs] 575 00:23:53,099 --> 00:23:55,852 Well, you got the tits to be a mom. 576 00:23:56,018 --> 00:23:57,603 -[Terry] What the hell, Pat? -[Pat clears throat] 577 00:23:57,728 --> 00:24:01,816 God, why don't you just finish me off with the ax now? 578 00:24:01,983 --> 00:24:04,527 [sighs] I'm sorry, sweetie. 579 00:24:04,694 --> 00:24:08,823 I've just been hearing all week how old I am. 580 00:24:08,948 --> 00:24:10,241 [Terry] You can take it. 581 00:24:11,993 --> 00:24:13,244 You're beautiful. 582 00:24:13,411 --> 00:24:15,913 [Pat chuckles] Thank you. [inhales deeply] 583 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:19,208 It's just been a lot. 584 00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:23,129 Well, guess the good news is at least we're doing it together. 585 00:24:23,296 --> 00:24:25,214 Hmm. 586 00:24:25,381 --> 00:24:28,092 I'm glad you came back to die with me. 587 00:24:28,259 --> 00:24:29,760 [chuckles] 588 00:24:29,927 --> 00:24:31,637 Yeah, me too. 589 00:24:31,804 --> 00:24:33,055 [gel squelching] 590 00:24:33,222 --> 00:24:34,849 [Dr. Skapoli] Abe Bellamy, hmm? 591 00:24:35,016 --> 00:24:36,559 Well, there's a name from the past. 592 00:24:36,726 --> 00:24:37,935 He delivered both of our kids. 593 00:24:38,102 --> 00:24:39,812 Oh, you know, he delivered my wife. 594 00:24:39,979 --> 00:24:41,898 All right, so your uterus 595 00:24:42,064 --> 00:24:44,358 has a nice, beautiful thick lining, 596 00:24:44,525 --> 00:24:46,444 so I think you've got a pretty good chance 597 00:24:46,611 --> 00:24:48,779 -at seeing this through. -Through what? A jar? 598 00:24:48,946 --> 00:24:50,781 Um, I've seen older pregnancies. 599 00:24:50,948 --> 00:24:53,326 In humans? 600 00:24:53,492 --> 00:24:56,370 No, but, you know, getting pregnant at your age, 601 00:24:56,537 --> 00:24:58,164 that's the hard part, right? 602 00:24:58,331 --> 00:25:00,833 You have got a good shot at a healthy baby. 603 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,501 Aw. 604 00:25:02,668 --> 00:25:05,254 So you're saying I'm--I'm just gonna have a normal pregnancy? 605 00:25:05,421 --> 00:25:06,964 Well, it would be a geriatric pregnancy. 606 00:25:07,131 --> 00:25:08,633 -Forgive the term. -I wasn't offended 607 00:25:08,799 --> 00:25:11,052 when I had my first geriatric pregnancy 18 years ago. 608 00:25:11,177 --> 00:25:12,762 Oh, okay, so then you know that we just need 609 00:25:12,929 --> 00:25:15,306 to take a little bit of extra care--that's all. 610 00:25:15,473 --> 00:25:17,767 Okay, so do you guys want a picture? 611 00:25:17,934 --> 00:25:19,310 Yeah, sure. 612 00:25:19,477 --> 00:25:21,103 -[Dr. Skapoli] Oh. -No, no, no, honey. 613 00:25:21,270 --> 00:25:22,521 He means of the baby. 614 00:25:22,688 --> 00:25:24,523 [clicks tongue] Yeah. 615 00:25:24,690 --> 00:25:27,026 -[Dr. Skapoli] Huh. -[static whirs] 616 00:25:27,151 --> 00:25:28,569 That's weird. 617 00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:31,864 Must be a loose cable. Let me just, uh, check it. 618 00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:33,449 Oh, and there is one more thing. 619 00:25:33,616 --> 00:25:35,117 Given your mental-health history, 620 00:25:35,284 --> 00:25:37,912 there is a teeny, tiny risk of pregnancy psychosis. 621 00:25:38,037 --> 00:25:40,206 Now, we think it has to do with increased hormone levels, 622 00:25:40,331 --> 00:25:43,000 but, really, it's amazing how much we don't even know. 623 00:25:43,167 --> 00:25:45,127 Anyway, the symptoms include hallucinations, 624 00:25:45,294 --> 00:25:47,088 delusions, mood swings, and depression. 625 00:25:47,213 --> 00:25:49,757 Again, it affects such an itsy-bitsy percentage of women. 626 00:25:49,924 --> 00:25:52,176 I am just ethically obligated to mention it. 627 00:25:52,343 --> 00:25:53,886 Amazing. 628 00:25:54,011 --> 00:25:57,056 Here, meet your new baby. 629 00:25:57,223 --> 00:26:00,643 [Terry] Aw, look at that. 630 00:26:00,810 --> 00:26:02,353 -A little--a little ba--oh, no. -[Pat] No. 631 00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:03,562 [Terry] Yeah. 632 00:26:03,729 --> 00:26:05,731 Hey... 633 00:26:05,898 --> 00:26:07,608 baby. 634 00:26:09,360 --> 00:26:10,695 -[screams] -Oh, God. 635 00:26:10,861 --> 00:26:13,322 -[Terry] God! -Ah, you're such a baby! 636 00:26:13,489 --> 00:26:15,825 -God! -It's just a testosterone shot. 637 00:26:15,992 --> 00:26:19,287 [groans] I think I already feel it. 638 00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:22,331 Look at this. 639 00:26:22,498 --> 00:26:23,958 You'd tell me if I get too jacked, right? 640 00:26:24,125 --> 00:26:25,543 [Pat] I promise. 641 00:26:25,710 --> 00:26:27,420 [sighs] Or if my balls shrink? That's a real thing. 642 00:26:27,545 --> 00:26:29,964 Honey, I honestly don't have the bandwidth 643 00:26:30,089 --> 00:26:32,341 to talk about your balls today. 644 00:26:32,508 --> 00:26:34,176 What's wrong with you? 645 00:26:34,343 --> 00:26:37,096 I don't know. I'm just thinking, um... 646 00:26:37,263 --> 00:26:41,809 What if I pass my crazy on to the baby? 647 00:26:41,976 --> 00:26:43,269 [scoffs] 648 00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:46,063 You're gonna pass so many amazing things on 649 00:26:46,230 --> 00:26:48,065 to this little baby, 650 00:26:48,232 --> 00:26:51,402 and if one of them's crazy, then... 651 00:26:51,569 --> 00:26:53,779 they'll fix it... 652 00:26:53,946 --> 00:26:56,073 just like they fixed you. 653 00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:58,200 I'm gonna take a shower. 654 00:26:58,367 --> 00:27:00,953 You think I should take a before picture of my testicles? 655 00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:02,204 Yeah, I do. 656 00:27:02,371 --> 00:27:04,415 Okay, I will. 657 00:27:04,582 --> 00:27:06,334 [laughs] Oh, God. 658 00:27:09,211 --> 00:27:11,130 [Pat sighs] 659 00:27:14,967 --> 00:27:17,762 [soft piano music plays] 660 00:27:17,928 --> 00:27:21,307 You're gonna be okay. 661 00:27:21,432 --> 00:27:22,600 You're gonna be fine. 662 00:27:22,767 --> 00:27:24,060 [distant clanging] 663 00:27:24,226 --> 00:27:25,978 Oh, come on. 664 00:27:26,145 --> 00:27:28,147 [Jake, muffled] Mom? 665 00:27:28,314 --> 00:27:30,399 -Jake? -[distant clanging] 666 00:27:30,566 --> 00:27:33,277 -Where are you? -[Jake] In the wall! 667 00:27:33,444 --> 00:27:35,154 [ominous thud] 668 00:27:35,321 --> 00:27:36,364 Which wall? 669 00:27:36,489 --> 00:27:38,574 [rattling] 670 00:27:38,741 --> 00:27:40,951 [Jake] I think I'm downstairs. 671 00:27:43,371 --> 00:27:44,497 Jake? 672 00:27:46,290 --> 00:27:48,667 Jake? 673 00:27:48,834 --> 00:27:50,586 I'm here! 674 00:27:52,254 --> 00:27:54,924 Jake. 675 00:27:55,091 --> 00:27:56,967 Don't stop banging! 676 00:27:57,093 --> 00:28:00,971 [clanging continues] 677 00:28:01,138 --> 00:28:02,807 Don't stop banging! 678 00:28:02,973 --> 00:28:07,103 [clanging continues loudly] 679 00:28:07,269 --> 00:28:08,938 [clanging stops] 680 00:28:09,105 --> 00:28:12,858 Why did you stop banging? 681 00:28:13,025 --> 00:28:14,485 Jake? 682 00:28:16,654 --> 00:28:18,948 [screams] 683 00:28:19,115 --> 00:28:21,951 [suspenseful music plays] 684 00:28:22,118 --> 00:28:24,995 [Jake grunting, breathing heavily] 685 00:28:26,622 --> 00:28:27,790 Oh, hey, Mom. 686 00:28:27,957 --> 00:28:29,875 Oh, my baby. 687 00:28:30,042 --> 00:28:33,129 Oh, my God, you are a mess. 688 00:28:33,295 --> 00:28:35,297 How long have you been in there? 689 00:28:35,464 --> 00:28:39,135 Uh, only, like, four hours and, uh, three days. 690 00:28:39,301 --> 00:28:41,053 ♪ ♪♪♪ 691 00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:43,139 Oh, my God. 692 00:28:43,305 --> 00:28:45,558 I am so sorry. 693 00:28:45,683 --> 00:28:47,143 [sighing] Oh, God. 694 00:28:47,309 --> 00:28:49,979 I promise you... 695 00:28:50,146 --> 00:28:52,064 I'm gonna be a better mom. 696 00:28:52,231 --> 00:28:53,983 I am. I'm gonna be better. 697 00:28:54,150 --> 00:28:56,068 -[Jake] Okay. -Okay. 698 00:28:56,235 --> 00:28:58,487 Go shower. 699 00:28:58,654 --> 00:28:59,989 -Oh, my God. -[Jake] Oh. 700 00:29:00,156 --> 00:29:01,532 Can I tell you about what I found in there? 701 00:29:01,699 --> 00:29:03,742 Spoiler alert-- it's old-timey boobs and candy. 702 00:29:03,909 --> 00:29:05,870 [chuckles] Okay, let's go. 703 00:29:06,036 --> 00:29:08,122 Oh, babe. 704 00:29:08,247 --> 00:29:09,957 Uh... 705 00:29:10,082 --> 00:29:12,918 [soft music plays] 706 00:29:13,085 --> 00:29:16,046 ♪ ♪ 707 00:29:27,266 --> 00:29:29,768 -Stay away! -[screams] 708 00:30:07,848 --> 00:30:08,641 [person whistling] 709 00:30:08,807 --> 00:30:09,808 [seagulls crying]