1
00:00:05,570 --> 00:00:08,008
Are you sure you're ready
to go back to work, Calvin?
2
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:12,012
It's been two weeks, Tina.
My knee is healed, all right?
3
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:13,448
I didn't stay home this long
4
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:15,406
when I had
gallstones taken out.
5
00:00:16,494 --> 00:00:18,583
You didn't have
gallstones taken out.
6
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,585
It was your appendix.
7
00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:22,979
Well, something came out,
and I was right back on my feet.
8
00:00:24,241 --> 00:00:26,243
All right, Calvin.
9
00:00:26,243 --> 00:00:27,853
Venturing out in the world?
10
00:00:27,853 --> 00:00:30,508
He's supposed to be venturing
to physical therapy,
11
00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:32,206
but he won't make
an appointment.
12
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:35,687
I don't need it, Tina.
I was born in the '60s.
13
00:00:35,687 --> 00:00:37,733
That's when things were
built tough.
14
00:00:37,733 --> 00:00:39,778
I'm not made
of fiberglass and plastic
15
00:00:39,778 --> 00:00:41,084
like these new people.
16
00:00:42,651 --> 00:00:44,827
Hi.
17
00:00:44,827 --> 00:00:46,437
Hey, what's... Hey, what's with
the big thermometer?
18
00:00:46,437 --> 00:00:48,526
It's for our
fundraising campaign,
19
00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:50,398
but I can't
leave it at school.
20
00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:53,749
Some creative young artist
keeps adding things to it
21
00:00:53,749 --> 00:00:56,360
that, uh, make it look
like something else.
22
00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:57,709
Oh. Like what?
23
00:01:00,408 --> 00:01:03,628
- Oh... yeah.
- Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
24
00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:05,674
We're raising money
to build an aquatic center
25
00:01:05,674 --> 00:01:07,632
to attract new families
to the school.
26
00:01:07,632 --> 00:01:09,939
Finally, we can stick it
to those snobs
27
00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:11,462
at the Oak Ridge Academy.
28
00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:13,638
Hey, do you know their cafeteria
has a Michelin star?
29
00:01:14,944 --> 00:01:17,816
Stop following that
school on Instagram!
30
00:01:18,861 --> 00:01:20,863
- I got to run.
- Yeah, you know what,
me too.
31
00:01:22,125 --> 00:01:23,431
Okay.
32
00:01:23,431 --> 00:01:24,823
Enough, Calvin.
33
00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:26,521
I'm making you
an appointment for PT.
34
00:01:26,521 --> 00:01:28,392
Ooh, you know, I know
a great physical therapist.
35
00:01:28,392 --> 00:01:30,568
I refer people to him
at the VA all the time.
36
00:01:30,568 --> 00:01:32,135
His name is Derrick Frye.
37
00:01:32,135 --> 00:01:34,050
Oh, the Derrick Frye?
38
00:01:34,050 --> 00:01:35,443
Used to play for the Rams?
39
00:01:35,443 --> 00:01:36,574
So, you've heard of him?
40
00:01:36,574 --> 00:01:38,533
Yes, Dave.
I'm a man.
41
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:40,796
And I watch football.
42
00:01:40,796 --> 00:01:42,537
Oh, good.
So, you'll do it?
43
00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:44,147
Yeah. Yeah, I guess,
you know, if I--
44
00:01:44,147 --> 00:01:46,062
I mean, if I need to do it,
45
00:01:46,062 --> 00:01:48,543
then I might as well
go to someone
46
00:01:48,543 --> 00:01:51,981
who's used to working
on elite athletes like myself.
47
00:01:53,243 --> 00:01:54,201
I'm out of here, guys.
48
00:02:02,818 --> 00:02:04,646
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
49
00:02:04,646 --> 00:02:06,082
♪ Welcome to the hood.
50
00:02:14,699 --> 00:02:17,441
Whoa. What happened
to you?
51
00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:21,141
After-school art club.
That's what happened to me.
52
00:02:22,446 --> 00:02:25,580
I'm a history teacher.
Look at this top.
53
00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:28,060
I was gonna take this back!
54
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,671
You're lucky.
55
00:02:29,671 --> 00:02:31,673
Our dear principal
made me supervise
56
00:02:31,673 --> 00:02:33,153
the softball team.
57
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:35,894
I had to wear this huge
leather glove thing.
58
00:02:35,894 --> 00:02:37,635
And it was not new.
59
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:42,205
Well, it's all
for the kids, right?
60
00:02:42,205 --> 00:02:45,600
Are the kids gonna
refund me my $59?
61
00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:48,864
$59? American dollars?
62
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:51,519
I'm quoting the original price.
63
00:02:51,519 --> 00:02:53,608
Look, the point is,
64
00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:55,349
we are being overworked.
65
00:02:55,349 --> 00:02:56,959
I know she's
your friend and all,
66
00:02:56,959 --> 00:02:58,700
but Principal Johnson
needs to stop asking us
67
00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,180
to do double duty.
68
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,485
She's got to hire
some teachers' aides.
69
00:03:01,485 --> 00:03:03,487
Look, look, no one cares
about this school
70
00:03:03,487 --> 00:03:04,836
more than Gemma, okay?
71
00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,229
She busts her butt, too.
72
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:07,926
Let's cut her
a little slack, okay?
73
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:10,102
- Hello, teachers!
- Hey.
74
00:03:10,102 --> 00:03:13,454
Oh! Looks like
someone had fun in art.
75
00:03:13,454 --> 00:03:15,020
Sure did.
76
00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:16,892
You know me,
anything for the kids.
77
00:03:16,892 --> 00:03:17,936
Aw.
78
00:03:17,936 --> 00:03:19,721
That's right.
79
00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:22,158
Speaking of which, is anyone
free tomorrow afternoon?
80
00:03:24,421 --> 00:03:25,640
Thank you, Tina!
81
00:03:27,598 --> 00:03:29,557
Wh-wh-what?
I didn't say yes.
82
00:03:29,557 --> 00:03:31,385
But it's an emergency.
83
00:03:31,385 --> 00:03:32,995
I need someone to chaperone
the fifth graders' field trip
84
00:03:32,995 --> 00:03:35,258
to the Altadena
Waste Disposal Center.
85
00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:36,564
You mean the dump.
86
00:03:36,564 --> 00:03:38,522
Please don't call it
"the dump."
87
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,568
The dump people get
very offended.
88
00:03:43,353 --> 00:03:45,137
I'd do it,
but I'm swamped.
89
00:03:45,137 --> 00:03:47,139
I've got the
fundraising campaign,
90
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,576
the annual report to finish,
91
00:03:48,576 --> 00:03:50,404
back-to-back donor dinners...
92
00:03:50,404 --> 00:03:51,970
Plus, it'll be fun.
93
00:03:51,970 --> 00:03:53,581
Fine.
94
00:03:53,581 --> 00:03:55,713
You're the best.
95
00:03:55,713 --> 00:03:57,498
Eh.
96
00:03:59,413 --> 00:04:01,589
- Have fun, Tina.
- Mm-hmm.
97
00:04:01,589 --> 00:04:04,244
Hope you had
your tetanus shot.
98
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:07,943
Yeah, you know,
99
00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,597
I was a running back
back in my day.
100
00:04:09,597 --> 00:04:12,774
And I almost made the pros,
101
00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:15,342
but, you know,
just missed the cut, man.
102
00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:18,606
Really? What college
did you play for?
103
00:04:19,650 --> 00:04:20,869
You know...
...in college, too.
104
00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:21,957
I-I missed the cut.
105
00:04:21,957 --> 00:04:23,263
I missed the cut.
106
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,613
But, uh,
I dominated in high school,
107
00:04:25,613 --> 00:04:28,268
middle school, peewee,
you know.
108
00:04:29,399 --> 00:04:31,227
It's just good to talk
to somebody else
109
00:04:31,227 --> 00:04:32,446
that played the game.
110
00:04:32,446 --> 00:04:34,622
You know.
111
00:04:34,622 --> 00:04:36,406
All right, Calvin,
I need to know,
112
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:38,495
are you injured
or are you hurt?
113
00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:40,497
What's the difference?
114
00:04:40,497 --> 00:04:42,673
If you're injured,
you can't play.
115
00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:44,849
But if you're hurt,
I'm gonna put your butt
116
00:04:44,849 --> 00:04:46,895
back on the field
and give you the ball.
117
00:04:48,505 --> 00:04:50,246
Okay... Mm-hmm.
118
00:04:52,161 --> 00:04:55,033
Now, I'm gonna ask you
one more damn time--
119
00:04:55,033 --> 00:04:58,341
Are you injured
or are you hurt?
120
00:04:58,341 --> 00:05:00,952
You know, I'm still
a little confused...
121
00:05:02,084 --> 00:05:04,826
...but I'm gonna say "hurt"?
122
00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:07,350
Now we're talking.
123
00:05:07,350 --> 00:05:08,699
Now let's get you
off that bench... Okay.
124
00:05:08,699 --> 00:05:10,701
- ...and back in the game.
- All right.
125
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,489
Now, this
electro stim machine
126
00:05:15,489 --> 00:05:16,751
is gonna get
the blood flowing
127
00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:17,882
to your knee.
128
00:05:17,882 --> 00:05:19,536
- Let's get to work.
- All right.
129
00:05:19,536 --> 00:05:20,842
Mm.
130
00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:24,367
How's that feel?
131
00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:26,369
I didn't even know it was on.
132
00:05:28,066 --> 00:05:29,503
That's what
I'm talking about.
133
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:30,852
Let's crank it up, then.
134
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:33,071
Okay.
135
00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:35,160
No pain, no gain.
136
00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:36,858
That's my motto.
137
00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:39,556
All right.
138
00:05:39,556 --> 00:05:41,166
Now we're
getting somewhere.
139
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:42,429
You good?
140
00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:44,387
I'm okay. I'm all right.
141
00:05:49,087 --> 00:05:50,306
Whoo. Okay, man.
142
00:05:50,306 --> 00:05:52,787
Well, thanks for coming, man.
143
00:05:53,831 --> 00:05:55,442
That was a good one
right there.
144
00:05:56,486 --> 00:05:58,445
Are you under the impression
that we're done here?
145
00:05:58,445 --> 00:05:59,837
No, sir.
146
00:05:59,837 --> 00:06:01,970
Coach... sir...
D-doctor. Doctor?
147
00:06:01,970 --> 00:06:04,015
Pick one!
Okay.
148
00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:08,629
Right. So, Pop drove
all the way to work today
149
00:06:08,629 --> 00:06:10,979
but didn't get out
of his truck?
150
00:06:10,979 --> 00:06:12,589
I think his knee
still hurts.
151
00:06:12,589 --> 00:06:14,635
We had to have our staff
meeting in the parking lot.
152
00:06:14,635 --> 00:06:16,637
Whenever he didn't like an idea,
he just honked.
153
00:06:18,508 --> 00:06:19,988
Ooh. I'd better go.
154
00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:22,033
I am about to be late
for class.
155
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:23,078
Uh, okay.
156
00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:26,211
Malcolm, yeah, I got
something to show you, man.
157
00:06:26,211 --> 00:06:27,256
It's about your girl--
158
00:06:27,256 --> 00:06:28,736
- What?
- Janelle!
159
00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:31,303
Hey, how you doing?
160
00:06:31,303 --> 00:06:33,088
You're rocking
that computer bag.
161
00:06:33,088 --> 00:06:34,611
Thank you.
162
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,483
Okay.
163
00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:37,788
Bye, babe.
Bye.
164
00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:39,007
See you later.
165
00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:40,965
Uh... what's going on, Trey?
166
00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:43,446
All right, look, I'm not
even gonna sugarcoat this.
167
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:45,535
I was scrolling on Tinder,
looking for a wife--
168
00:06:45,535 --> 00:06:47,145
Yours or someone else's?
169
00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:49,539
I mean, I'm open.
170
00:06:51,019 --> 00:06:53,456
Anyway,
I swiped on Janelle.
171
00:06:53,456 --> 00:06:54,805
Whoa, Janelle?
172
00:06:54,805 --> 00:06:56,677
Why would you swipe
on my Janelle?
173
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:58,505
Nah, see, I was just
swiping and swiping,
174
00:06:58,505 --> 00:07:00,376
and before I realized,
it-it was her.
175
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:01,769
And you can't un-swipe.
176
00:07:04,467 --> 00:07:06,382
Why is she on a dating app?
177
00:07:06,382 --> 00:07:07,992
I don't know,
but whatever you do,
178
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:10,038
don't tell her I told you,
'cause I ain't no snitch.
179
00:07:10,038 --> 00:07:11,126
I got you, man.
Don't say that.
180
00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:12,432
Hey. I forgot my keys.
181
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,042
Yeah, uh, Trey saw you
on Tinder!
182
00:07:14,042 --> 00:07:15,522
No, I didn't.
No, I didn't.
183
00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:16,914
Come on, Trey.
184
00:07:16,914 --> 00:07:19,047
Yes.
185
00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:20,483
I guess I still have the app,
186
00:07:20,483 --> 00:07:21,919
but I wouldn't say
I'm on there.
187
00:07:21,919 --> 00:07:23,486
I mean,
I still have Angry Birds.
188
00:07:24,618 --> 00:07:27,142
Yeah, I guess I need
to free up some storage space.
189
00:07:27,142 --> 00:07:29,579
Yeah, that's,
that's a great idea.
190
00:07:29,579 --> 00:07:32,060
Why don't you start
with Tinder?
191
00:07:33,801 --> 00:07:37,239
I mean, I need more space
for our pictures.
192
00:07:37,239 --> 00:07:39,067
- And that video.
- Shh.
193
00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:45,943
Damn!
194
00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:47,249
What?
195
00:07:47,249 --> 00:07:48,511
Well, I mean,
196
00:07:48,511 --> 00:07:50,513
you-you're finally
settling down.
197
00:07:50,513 --> 00:07:52,559
Oh, settling down?
What you talking about?
198
00:07:52,559 --> 00:07:54,865
I mean, you made her delete
her dating app.
199
00:07:54,865 --> 00:07:56,563
You low-key just proposed.
200
00:07:56,563 --> 00:07:59,043
What?
That's ridiculous, man.
201
00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:01,524
♪ Malcolm's got
a girlfriend! ♪All right, stop.
202
00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:04,353
Stop. Anybody can--♪ Malcolm's got a girlfriend,
Malcolm's got a girlfriend. ♪
203
00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:18,280
I think there's something
rotten in the fridge.
204
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:19,499
It's not the fridge.
205
00:08:22,676 --> 00:08:24,591
Yes, it's me!
206
00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:27,158
One of the kids thought he saw
a hundred dollar bill
207
00:08:27,158 --> 00:08:29,117
in a pile of garbage
and went after it.
208
00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:31,685
And guess who had
to pull him out? Me!
209
00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:35,253
Turned out to be a flyer
for a strip club.
210
00:08:37,212 --> 00:08:40,650
Hello to the best faculty
in all of Pasadena.
211
00:08:40,650 --> 00:08:42,870
Ooh, it's a little
ripe in here.
212
00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:46,003
That's because
I just got back
213
00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:49,485
from that "waste treatment
center" that you sent me to.
214
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:50,965
Ugh, thank you so much.
215
00:08:50,965 --> 00:08:53,271
I'd hug you, but...
you know.
216
00:08:53,271 --> 00:08:54,577
Now...
217
00:08:55,709 --> 00:08:58,189
Who has a red marker?
218
00:08:58,189 --> 00:09:00,017
I have exciting news.
219
00:09:00,017 --> 00:09:03,020
Is that bag covering
what I think it's covering?
220
00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:04,674
It was in a locked cabinet.
221
00:09:04,674 --> 00:09:06,763
I don't know how these kids
are getting to it.
222
00:09:06,763 --> 00:09:09,070
It's the parents.
I blame the parents.
223
00:09:10,114 --> 00:09:12,552
But not to their faces,
because...
224
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:15,424
we are now at 85%
of our fundraising goal
225
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:16,904
for the new aquatic center.
226
00:09:16,904 --> 00:09:19,428
It's gonna look so great
on the school's brochure.
227
00:09:19,428 --> 00:09:21,648
Oh, Mr. Ryan, I need you
228
00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:23,432
to design a brochure.
229
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:25,260
On top of debate club,
230
00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:27,610
parking lot duty,
and Model U.N.?
231
00:09:27,610 --> 00:09:30,613
Thank you!
You are a rock star.
232
00:09:32,049 --> 00:09:34,443
I really can't
thank you all enough
233
00:09:34,443 --> 00:09:36,445
for going the extra mile
for our kids.
234
00:09:36,445 --> 00:09:38,360
You-you really
want to thank us?
235
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:40,710
Try hiring some
teachers' aides.
236
00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:43,583
That would be fantastic.
237
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:44,845
Uh...
238
00:09:44,845 --> 00:09:46,629
I wish we could afford it.
239
00:09:46,629 --> 00:09:48,500
Oops! I've got to run
240
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,981
to an organizing meeting
for the silent auction.
241
00:09:50,981 --> 00:09:52,461
Smell you later.
242
00:09:52,461 --> 00:09:54,245
Sorry, that's just
an expression.
243
00:09:57,248 --> 00:09:58,902
Now come on,
Calvin. Let's go.
244
00:09:58,902 --> 00:10:00,643
I've got
a reputation here.
245
00:10:00,643 --> 00:10:02,210
By the second
or third session,
246
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:04,081
I've always gotten
my client to 50%.
247
00:10:05,082 --> 00:10:06,388
I'm undefeated.
248
00:10:07,389 --> 00:10:08,608
At therapy?
249
00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:10,218
At life.
250
00:10:11,262 --> 00:10:14,526
Now, we're gonna do
some fire cupping.
251
00:10:15,571 --> 00:10:17,094
You don't mind
a little heat, do you?
252
00:10:17,094 --> 00:10:19,923
Well, I mind being set on fire.
253
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,449
A little fire never
hurt anybody.
254
00:10:25,407 --> 00:10:26,669
Well, that's not true.
255
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,889
That's why they have burn units.
256
00:10:29,933 --> 00:10:31,065
Ooh, hey, Calvin.
257
00:10:31,065 --> 00:10:32,066
Sorry, sorry.
258
00:10:32,066 --> 00:10:33,328
I don't want to interrupt.
259
00:10:33,328 --> 00:10:34,459
Oh, oh, it's not interrupting.
260
00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:35,983
You're not interrupting.
261
00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,680
There's always time for Dave.
You know what?
262
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:41,945
Uh, let's put a pin in
this fire cup thing, okay?
263
00:10:42,946 --> 00:10:44,687
Okay.
264
00:10:45,906 --> 00:10:47,472
Is it fire
cupping time?
265
00:10:47,472 --> 00:10:49,083
You know, I remember
when Derek did this to me.
266
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:50,475
It was rough.
267
00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:51,694
It was?
268
00:10:51,694 --> 00:10:53,653
You could have fooled me.
269
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,350
Hey, your man Dave, here?
270
00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:57,004
He can take
some pain.
271
00:10:58,048 --> 00:10:59,441
This Dave?
272
00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,530
Fanny pack Dave?
273
00:11:03,097 --> 00:11:04,359
Oh, yeah.
274
00:11:04,359 --> 00:11:06,013
This man's a beast.
275
00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:07,623
I haven't worked with
a guy this tough
276
00:11:07,623 --> 00:11:08,711
since The Rock.
277
00:11:08,711 --> 00:11:10,104
Okay,
278
00:11:10,104 --> 00:11:13,063
did you just compare Dave
to The Rock?
279
00:11:13,063 --> 00:11:14,717
Oh, no,
280
00:11:14,717 --> 00:11:18,373
I compared The Rock to Dave.
281
00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:23,552
Now, now, Calvin, look,
I don't want
282
00:11:23,552 --> 00:11:26,816
Derek's effusive compliments
to make you feel less than.
283
00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:30,777
Okay? Not everyone has
my strength and fortitude.
284
00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:32,039
Mm-hmm.
285
00:11:32,039 --> 00:11:34,476
I have to open jars for you.
286
00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:37,522
You know what?
287
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,829
Come on. Light me back on fire.
288
00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:41,309
Let's go!
289
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,185
So Tina and the teachers
290
00:11:48,185 --> 00:11:49,926
asked you to hire
teachers' aides?
291
00:11:49,926 --> 00:11:50,927
Yeah.
292
00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:52,537
So you're giving them candles
293
00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:54,235
and Hershey's kisses?
294
00:11:54,235 --> 00:11:55,453
We can't afford
the good stuff.
295
00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:57,499
These are Costco Smooches.
296
00:11:58,935 --> 00:12:01,982
And, uh, that's...
297
00:12:01,982 --> 00:12:03,200
Yes, it's
hair, Dave.
298
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:04,332
They've added hair.
299
00:12:06,421 --> 00:12:08,684
The artist has gotten ambitious.
300
00:12:08,684 --> 00:12:11,339
I just hope the teachers
appreciate this gesture.
301
00:12:11,339 --> 00:12:12,514
I don't know
what else to do.
302
00:12:12,514 --> 00:12:14,124
They just
don't understand
303
00:12:14,124 --> 00:12:16,126
what the aquatic center
will do for the school.
304
00:12:16,126 --> 00:12:17,693
I mean, I don't, either.
305
00:12:17,693 --> 00:12:19,042
None of my friends do.
306
00:12:19,042 --> 00:12:20,391
Well, luckily,
307
00:12:20,391 --> 00:12:21,784
your friends don't
run the school.
308
00:12:23,699 --> 00:12:24,961
Hey, buddy,
Is that...
309
00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:27,268
Is that Magic Marker
on your hand?
310
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:31,359
Uh, I don't know.
They're in my pockets.
311
00:12:33,274 --> 00:12:36,973
Were you the one drawing
testicles on my thermometer?
312
00:12:37,974 --> 00:12:40,803
Okay, Gemma, relax.
Our son would never do that.
313
00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:42,457
I mean, that'd be nuts.
314
00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,768
All right.
315
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,334
Quality dad joke.
316
00:12:55,818 --> 00:12:57,733
Hey.
Hey.
317
00:12:57,733 --> 00:12:59,169
Before you say anything,
318
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:01,171
this is not a dating app.
It's a video.
319
00:13:01,171 --> 00:13:02,999
It's the one with the baby
sitting in the snow going...
320
00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:08,352
Yeah, that's
a good one.
321
00:13:09,832 --> 00:13:12,356
Hey, you know what?
I owe you an apology.
322
00:13:12,356 --> 00:13:13,880
Yeah, I made way
too big a deal
323
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,664
about you being on
a silly little app,
324
00:13:15,664 --> 00:13:17,361
and, uh, I wouldn't blame you
325
00:13:17,361 --> 00:13:18,754
for putting it
back on your phone.
326
00:13:18,754 --> 00:13:20,974
Nah, I don't need it.
327
00:13:20,974 --> 00:13:22,932
I forgot it was even there.
328
00:13:22,932 --> 00:13:24,629
No, but really, really,
329
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,109
you should put it back.
330
00:13:26,109 --> 00:13:28,590
You know, if only
to show me I had no right
331
00:13:28,590 --> 00:13:30,157
telling you to delete it, huh?
332
00:13:30,157 --> 00:13:32,768
Who the hell do I think I am?
333
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,510
So you want me
to start using it again?
334
00:13:35,510 --> 00:13:37,338
Well, I'm not saying
you have to use it...
335
00:13:37,338 --> 00:13:38,426
But I should have it?
336
00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:39,601
You should have the right
337
00:13:39,601 --> 00:13:40,994
to have it.
338
00:13:42,778 --> 00:13:44,562
Okay, we've been together,
what, eight months?
339
00:13:44,562 --> 00:13:45,650
Mm-hmm.
340
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:46,782
I think I'm finally starting
341
00:13:46,782 --> 00:13:49,002
- to understand you.
- Okay.
342
00:13:49,002 --> 00:13:51,656
Remember when you made us
register our relationship
343
00:13:51,656 --> 00:13:54,355
at the school,
but you kept insisting
344
00:13:54,355 --> 00:13:55,922
that we call it a "vibe"?
345
00:13:55,922 --> 00:13:59,055
Well, vibe means we vibing.
It's...
Yeah.
346
00:13:59,055 --> 00:14:00,665
Yeah, Malcolm, we're vibing,
347
00:14:00,665 --> 00:14:03,059
we're hanging, we're chilling,
we're kicking it.
348
00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:05,105
- Yeah.
- I just don't think
we're dating.
349
00:14:06,193 --> 00:14:07,803
Well, you know,
350
00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:09,283
we shouldn't have to put
labels on ourselves, right?
351
00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:10,458
We aren't label people.
352
00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:12,068
Mm-hmm.
353
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:14,897
Remember the time I left
my toothbrush at your place,
354
00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:17,595
accidentally,
and you lost your mind?
355
00:14:18,945 --> 00:14:21,643
Okay, I would not say
I lost my mind.
356
00:14:21,643 --> 00:14:23,775
You drove it to my house.
357
00:14:26,909 --> 00:14:28,998
And now that I've deleted
the stupid app,
358
00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:30,652
per your request,
359
00:14:30,652 --> 00:14:32,262
you're scared
360
00:14:32,262 --> 00:14:35,396
because that means
we're in a real relationship.
361
00:14:35,396 --> 00:14:36,788
You want boyfriend privileges,
362
00:14:36,788 --> 00:14:38,616
but you don't want
to be a boyfriend.
363
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,489
And I don't have time for that.
364
00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:44,535
Okay. Okay, okay,
look, Janelle,
365
00:14:44,535 --> 00:14:46,233
I got the solution, okay?
366
00:14:46,233 --> 00:14:49,279
Don't put Tinder
back on your phone.
367
00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:54,632
No, Malcolm,
I have the solution.
368
00:14:54,632 --> 00:14:55,895
We're done.
369
00:14:57,287 --> 00:14:58,985
What, done?
370
00:14:58,985 --> 00:15:00,551
You mean, like "done" done?
371
00:15:00,551 --> 00:15:02,597
You can say "done"
as many times as you want.
372
00:15:06,122 --> 00:15:07,297
It's over.
373
00:15:08,820 --> 00:15:10,431
Take care of yourself, Malcolm.
374
00:15:10,431 --> 00:15:12,259
Wait, Janelle...
375
00:15:15,218 --> 00:15:18,395
And then, out of the blue,
she broke up with me.
376
00:15:18,395 --> 00:15:20,397
- Can you believe that?
- No.
377
00:15:20,397 --> 00:15:21,659
We thought you
were going to
378
00:15:21,659 --> 00:15:22,878
- break up with her.
- Mm-hmm.
379
00:15:22,878 --> 00:15:24,358
What are you talking about?
380
00:15:24,358 --> 00:15:25,663
Come on, man.
381
00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:27,317
This seemed like
it was your way out.
382
00:15:27,317 --> 00:15:29,232
It's vintage Malcolm.
383
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:30,755
You date them for a while,
384
00:15:30,755 --> 00:15:32,714
you find something wrong,
and then you're out.
385
00:15:33,802 --> 00:15:35,021
What? Man, I don't do that.
386
00:15:35,021 --> 00:15:36,979
- Oh, really?
- Keisha?
387
00:15:36,979 --> 00:15:39,025
Her second toe was longer
than her big toe.
388
00:15:39,025 --> 00:15:40,374
You were out.
389
00:15:40,374 --> 00:15:42,506
Well, I am drawn to
390
00:15:42,506 --> 00:15:44,639
a more traditional
flip-flop aesthetic.
391
00:15:46,336 --> 00:15:48,251
Tanya didn't make the bed.
392
00:15:48,251 --> 00:15:51,124
She was the last one in it.
Everyone knows that's the rule.
393
00:15:52,908 --> 00:15:54,997
Stephanie.
You broke up with her
394
00:15:54,997 --> 00:15:57,217
because she owned
her own bowling ball.
395
00:15:57,217 --> 00:16:00,176
It's weird. They have them
at the alley, Trey.
396
00:16:01,786 --> 00:16:03,571
Look, man,
I hate to say it, but...
397
00:16:03,571 --> 00:16:04,833
you have
a commitment problem.
398
00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,269
Man, you guys are crazy.
399
00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:08,576
Okay, so why couldn't you
commit to Janelle?
400
00:16:08,576 --> 00:16:10,578
I was planning on committing.
401
00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:13,276
I just hadn't decided
to definitely do it yet.
402
00:16:15,104 --> 00:16:17,237
Brother, I don't know
what you're looking for,
403
00:16:17,237 --> 00:16:18,760
but Janelle was brilliant
404
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:20,196
and funny,
405
00:16:20,196 --> 00:16:21,850
and she was super into you.
406
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:23,156
He ain't lying.
407
00:16:23,156 --> 00:16:24,940
If I had a Janelle,
408
00:16:24,940 --> 00:16:26,855
I wouldn't even be on Tinder.
409
00:16:26,855 --> 00:16:28,030
As much.
410
00:16:29,945 --> 00:16:31,816
Okay, you know what?
Y'all are acting like
411
00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:33,035
Janelle is perfect,
412
00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:35,211
but she... she has flaws.
413
00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:36,212
Like what?
414
00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,997
She has never seen
415
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:39,085
Coming to America.
416
00:16:40,738 --> 00:16:42,044
Yeah, okay.
417
00:16:43,393 --> 00:16:46,266
Other day,
I said, "Sexual Chocolate."
418
00:16:46,266 --> 00:16:49,269
She had no idea
what I was talking about.
419
00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:52,533
Sexual Chocolate!
420
00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:57,929
I have a problem, don't I?
421
00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:02,412
I can't thank you enough
422
00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:05,241
for your generous
gift, Dr. Kittay.
423
00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:07,156
Yes, see you
at the pool.
424
00:17:07,156 --> 00:17:10,681
Oh, in a speedo?
425
00:17:11,813 --> 00:17:13,597
Oh, you're great.
426
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,515
Hey, Gemma.
427
00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:19,560
Um,
428
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,301
we got to have a real talk.
429
00:17:21,301 --> 00:17:23,825
I am here on behalf
of the teachers.
430
00:17:23,825 --> 00:17:26,132
Oh, did the gift bags
cheer them up?
431
00:17:26,132 --> 00:17:28,960
Well, actually, they made
the teachers slightly angrier.
432
00:17:30,223 --> 00:17:31,659
You see, we all have candles,
433
00:17:31,659 --> 00:17:33,269
but what we need is help.
434
00:17:33,269 --> 00:17:34,879
We're understaffed.
435
00:17:34,879 --> 00:17:36,490
We need teachers' aides.
436
00:17:36,490 --> 00:17:38,187
I so hear you,
437
00:17:38,187 --> 00:17:39,928
and I've discussed it
with the board... Uh-huh.
438
00:17:39,928 --> 00:17:41,625
...and it's just not
in the budget right now.
439
00:17:41,625 --> 00:17:43,236
But a swimming pool
is in the budget?
440
00:17:43,236 --> 00:17:45,629
I wish. That's why
we're having a fundraiser.
441
00:17:47,501 --> 00:17:49,111
So why don't
you have a fundraiser
442
00:17:49,111 --> 00:17:50,504
for teachers' aides?
443
00:17:50,504 --> 00:17:52,071
That's not how it works.
444
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,768
Until you make it work that way.
445
00:17:53,768 --> 00:17:56,205
Tina, there's
a whole board of trustees
446
00:17:56,205 --> 00:17:58,642
I have to answer to. I'm sorry.
447
00:17:58,642 --> 00:18:00,166
But, hey,
448
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:02,298
if there's anything you need,
just name it.
449
00:18:02,298 --> 00:18:04,518
I've been naming it, Gemma.
450
00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:07,521
Teachers' aides.
451
00:18:10,045 --> 00:18:11,002
I'm sorry,
I've got to take this.
452
00:18:11,002 --> 00:18:13,831
Mr. Schaefer, hello.
453
00:18:13,831 --> 00:18:15,224
No, no, no,
I'm not busy at all.
454
00:18:20,229 --> 00:18:21,665
You know,
you never know
455
00:18:21,665 --> 00:18:22,840
how important
a knee is
456
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:23,972
until you...
457
00:18:23,972 --> 00:18:25,582
you don't have one,
you know?
458
00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:30,979
Anything I dropped on the ground
this last month stayed there.
459
00:18:32,546 --> 00:18:33,808
So, you feel better now, huh?
460
00:18:33,808 --> 00:18:36,419
Hey, I feel great.
You know what?
461
00:18:36,419 --> 00:18:38,073
Tackle me.
462
00:18:38,073 --> 00:18:40,162
Hey, don't tempt me.
463
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,123
Ooh, hey, guys. How's it going?
464
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:46,255
Oh, hey, Calvin, uh,
I found your sunglasses.
465
00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,387
I think you dropped them
in the driveway.
466
00:18:47,387 --> 00:18:48,997
You know what? Drop them now.
467
00:18:48,997 --> 00:18:50,781
Drop them.
468
00:18:52,087 --> 00:18:53,349
Okay. Um...
469
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:58,137
Whoa.
470
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:02,576
Your man Derek here
got me straight, man.
471
00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:05,231
Well, I couldn't have
done it without Dave.
472
00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:06,797
Dave?
473
00:19:06,797 --> 00:19:08,625
What'd Dave do?
474
00:19:08,625 --> 00:19:12,063
Look, I needed to inspire you
to try harder.
475
00:19:12,063 --> 00:19:13,761
So, uh,
476
00:19:13,761 --> 00:19:15,763
Derek held me up as an example
477
00:19:15,763 --> 00:19:18,418
of strength and machismo.
478
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:21,682
You see, I used
Dave here to light
479
00:19:21,682 --> 00:19:23,205
that competitive
fire in you.
480
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:24,728
You know, athletes
like you and me,
481
00:19:24,728 --> 00:19:26,077
we just need
to be challenged.
482
00:19:26,077 --> 00:19:27,818
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
483
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:29,951
You know. Yeah, we're the same,
484
00:19:29,951 --> 00:19:31,605
you know?
485
00:19:31,605 --> 00:19:33,650
So-so, what you're saying
is that Dave
486
00:19:33,650 --> 00:19:35,783
wasn't so tough in his sessions?
487
00:19:35,783 --> 00:19:38,873
No.
He cried like a baby.
488
00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:44,095
We've got the mockups
on the brochure.
489
00:19:44,095 --> 00:19:45,880
The aquatic center looks great.
490
00:19:46,837 --> 00:19:48,883
Yes, I have seen
the thermometer.
491
00:19:52,147 --> 00:19:54,149
No, I have no idea who did it.
492
00:19:54,149 --> 00:19:55,977
We don't need
no stinking pool.
493
00:19:55,977 --> 00:19:57,805
Teachers need
some help at school.
494
00:19:57,805 --> 00:19:59,372
We don't need
- no stinking pool.
- I've got to run.
495
00:19:59,372 --> 00:20:01,591
Teachers need
some help at school.
496
00:20:01,591 --> 00:20:03,332
We don't need
no stinking pool.
497
00:20:03,332 --> 00:20:05,029
Teachers need
some help at school.
498
00:20:05,029 --> 00:20:06,727
Tina, really?
499
00:20:06,727 --> 00:20:08,990
We don't want
Principal Johnson.
500
00:20:08,990 --> 00:20:10,948
Send her back home
to Wisconsin.
501
00:20:10,948 --> 00:20:12,733
We don't want
Principal Johnson.
502
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:14,604
Uh... Send her back home
to Wisconsin.
503
00:20:14,604 --> 00:20:16,519
I'm from Michigan!
504
00:20:16,519 --> 00:20:18,217
Send her back home
to Wisconsin.
505
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,088
Tina, tell them!
506
00:20:20,088 --> 00:20:22,221
Send her back home
to Wisconsin.
507
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,222
We don't want
Principal Johnson...
508
00:20:28,836 --> 00:20:30,054
No justice,
no homework.
509
00:20:30,054 --> 00:20:32,405
No justice, no homework.
510
00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:34,668
Grover, what are you doing?
Get to class.
511
00:20:34,668 --> 00:20:36,887
There are no
teachers, Gemma.
512
00:20:36,887 --> 00:20:38,237
He's an ally.
513
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:41,196
The principal has no principles.
514
00:20:42,589 --> 00:20:45,026
Both of those "principles"
are spelled wrong, Grover.
515
00:20:46,810 --> 00:20:48,856
Well, maybe your
new swimming pool
516
00:20:48,856 --> 00:20:50,727
can teach him
the difference.
517
00:20:52,294 --> 00:20:53,948
You don't need the megaphone.
518
00:20:53,948 --> 00:20:55,602
You're very easy to hear.
519
00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:57,038
Captioning sponsored by CBS
and TOYOTA.
520
00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:03,653
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
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