1
00:00:10,466 --> 00:00:12,726
Wine country,
here we come.
Yes.
2
00:00:12,772 --> 00:00:16,072
The car is loaded, and in
a few hours we will be, too.
3
00:00:16,124 --> 00:00:19,164
Ooh, this is gonna be
the best girls' trip ever.
4
00:00:19,214 --> 00:00:23,174
Gemma, I love America, but there
is no country like wine country.
5
00:00:23,218 --> 00:00:27,048
Okay, so one last
decision before we hit the road:
6
00:00:27,091 --> 00:00:29,831
Which one pairs best
with chardonnay,
7
00:00:29,876 --> 00:00:33,576
Jeanette or Tamika?
Ooh.
8
00:00:33,619 --> 00:00:35,449
Oh, what about that
curly black one
9
00:00:35,491 --> 00:00:37,571
that got us kicked out
of that club in Vegas?
10
00:00:37,623 --> 00:00:40,233
Dominique? Oh, no, no,
she's on the wagon.
11
00:00:40,278 --> 00:00:41,678
Oh.
12
00:00:41,714 --> 00:00:44,674
Uh-oh, Jeanette and Tamika.
13
00:00:44,717 --> 00:00:48,117
You can take one or the other,
but you can't take both.
14
00:00:48,156 --> 00:00:50,156
I'm not bailing
you three out again.
15
00:00:50,201 --> 00:00:53,681
Well, it looks like I'm gonna
have to go with Tamika,
16
00:00:53,726 --> 00:00:56,206
so you better behave.
17
00:00:56,251 --> 00:00:58,551
So you want to come watch
the transformation?
18
00:00:58,601 --> 00:01:01,211
Does my Aunt Mayvene dress up
her cats for the holidays?
19
00:01:01,256 --> 00:01:04,646
I was hoping no,
but sounds like yes.
20
00:01:04,694 --> 00:01:06,214
Yes.
21
00:01:06,261 --> 00:01:08,741
I'm just glad
she's not taking Dominique.
22
00:01:08,785 --> 00:01:11,135
That hair is trifling.
23
00:01:11,179 --> 00:01:13,789
What it do, C-Dawg?
24
00:01:13,833 --> 00:01:17,313
Oh, and I thought my biggest
problem was gonna be the wig.
25
00:01:17,359 --> 00:01:19,929
So, since the ladies
are gonna be gone,
26
00:01:19,970 --> 00:01:21,450
I got a little
surprise for us--
27
00:01:21,493 --> 00:01:24,883
front row tickets
to tonight's game.
28
00:01:24,931 --> 00:01:28,321
Seriously?
Courtside to the Laker game?
29
00:01:28,370 --> 00:01:31,290
C-Dawg is in.
30
00:01:31,329 --> 00:01:32,809
Well, actually,
31
00:01:32,852 --> 00:01:35,502
it's to the hockey game.
32
00:01:37,422 --> 00:01:40,252
Hockey? C-Dawg don't bark
for hockey.
33
00:01:40,295 --> 00:01:42,685
Well, come on,
it's gonna be great.
34
00:01:42,732 --> 00:01:45,162
Kings are playing the Red
Wings-- it's an epic rivalry.
35
00:01:45,213 --> 00:01:46,163
Why don't you
want to go?
36
00:01:46,214 --> 00:01:49,564
Well, for starters,
I'm black.
37
00:01:49,608 --> 00:01:53,048
I know that's what everybody
thinks about hockey,
38
00:01:53,090 --> 00:01:55,180
but the truth is, there's a lot
of black players now.
39
00:01:55,223 --> 00:01:58,523
Yeah, but they're probably all
Canadian, so that doesn't count.
40
00:01:58,574 --> 00:02:01,924
Come on, Calvin,
don't be such a Negative Nancy.
41
00:02:01,968 --> 00:02:03,408
I'll tell you what,
if at any point
42
00:02:03,448 --> 00:02:05,798
you're not having a good time,
you can leave.
43
00:02:05,842 --> 00:02:07,452
Great. Bye-bye.
44
00:02:09,541 --> 00:02:11,451
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
45
00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:12,770
♪ Welcome to the hood.
46
00:02:17,941 --> 00:02:19,151
Here's your beer.
47
00:02:19,203 --> 00:02:21,373
What'd I miss?
Nothing.
48
00:02:21,423 --> 00:02:23,903
Just a bunch of guys
with no vowels in their names
49
00:02:23,947 --> 00:02:25,167
skating in circles.
50
00:02:26,558 --> 00:02:28,168
I mean, the least
they could do
51
00:02:28,212 --> 00:02:30,432
is light the puck on fire
or something.
52
00:02:30,475 --> 00:02:33,175
Come on, Calvin,
you're missing
53
00:02:33,217 --> 00:02:34,737
the finer points
of the game here.
54
00:02:34,784 --> 00:02:37,694
I mean, look at these guys,
they're incredible athletes,
55
00:02:37,743 --> 00:02:40,963
skating 20 miles an hour
on a quarter-inch of steel.
56
00:02:41,007 --> 00:02:44,097
I don't know, man,
I-I'm just not seeing it.
57
00:02:44,141 --> 00:02:45,271
Oh!
Oh!
58
00:02:45,316 --> 00:02:46,276
Oh, I saw that.
59
00:02:46,317 --> 00:02:48,717
CROWD: Oh!Oh, and that!
60
00:02:48,754 --> 00:02:50,104
Oh!
61
00:02:50,147 --> 00:02:52,147
With hits like that,
who needs vowels?
62
00:02:52,193 --> 00:02:54,713
Yeah! Get him!
63
00:02:56,284 --> 00:02:59,244
Wow, this place
is beautiful.
64
00:02:59,287 --> 00:03:01,287
Now where's the wine?
65
00:03:01,332 --> 00:03:04,852
Ooh, there it is.
Thank you.
66
00:03:04,901 --> 00:03:06,421
I don't work here.
67
00:03:09,210 --> 00:03:11,480
Oh, well, this is good stuff,
you should get another one.
68
00:03:13,779 --> 00:03:15,259
Hello.
69
00:03:15,303 --> 00:03:17,653
Welcome to
Coastal Breeze Winery.
70
00:03:17,696 --> 00:03:20,046
Hi. We have a reservation
under Johnson.
71
00:03:20,090 --> 00:03:21,440
Hmm.
If possible,
72
00:03:21,483 --> 00:03:23,263
no balcony. We may get crazy,
73
00:03:23,311 --> 00:03:25,871
and it's safer if we're in
a room we can't fall out of.
74
00:03:25,922 --> 00:03:27,872
Oh, and, um,
75
00:03:27,924 --> 00:03:29,834
also nothing near
the elevator.
76
00:03:29,882 --> 00:03:32,442
We don't want to be bothered
by obnoxious drunks.
77
00:03:32,494 --> 00:03:33,844
GEMMA:
Oh, yeah.
78
00:03:35,105 --> 00:03:37,585
Fill 'er up.
79
00:03:37,629 --> 00:03:39,769
Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
80
00:03:39,805 --> 00:03:42,855
You're Mary J. Blige.
81
00:03:42,895 --> 00:03:44,335
What?
82
00:03:44,375 --> 00:03:47,375
Oh, no, honey,
it's the wig.
83
00:03:49,728 --> 00:03:51,778
My name is
Tina Butler.
84
00:03:51,817 --> 00:03:55,827
Oh, I get it. Keeping things
on the down low.
85
00:03:55,865 --> 00:03:57,125
Like me.
86
00:03:59,129 --> 00:04:02,219
Sorry to disappoint you,
but she really is Tina Butler.
87
00:04:02,263 --> 00:04:05,393
Well, for "Tina Butler's"
privacy,
88
00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:08,750
I'm going to upgrade you
to the penthouse suite.
89
00:04:08,791 --> 00:04:12,141
You can call
me Mary J.
90
00:04:23,980 --> 00:04:25,990
Man, there are two things
you don't want to be
91
00:04:26,025 --> 00:04:28,985
in a horror movie--
having sex or black.
92
00:04:34,033 --> 00:04:37,813
I mean, you, uh,
you're not scared, are you?
93
00:04:37,863 --> 00:04:40,343
Please, Malcolm,
I'm a grown man.
94
00:04:40,388 --> 00:04:42,048
I know scary movies
aren't real.
95
00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:57,408
What the hell is wrong
with you guys?
96
00:04:57,448 --> 00:04:59,538
Us? Nothing.
97
00:04:59,581 --> 00:05:02,231
Can't-can't two brothers
scream together?
98
00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:04,719
MALCOLM:
Yeah, uh,
99
00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:07,070
Pop, what's with
the outfits?
100
00:05:07,110 --> 00:05:08,720
Oh, we went to the
hockey game together.
101
00:05:08,764 --> 00:05:12,114
Yeah, and it was awesome.
Give me some.
102
00:05:16,902 --> 00:05:19,072
Hey, so we on
for tomorrow night?
103
00:05:19,122 --> 00:05:21,472
Pink Floyd laser show
at the planetarium?
104
00:05:21,516 --> 00:05:23,086
Oh, you can
"planet" on it.
105
00:05:23,126 --> 00:05:24,346
Okay, see you
tomorrow, buddy.
106
00:05:24,388 --> 00:05:26,088
Bye, guys.
See you, Dave.
107
00:05:26,129 --> 00:05:27,399
Yeah.
108
00:05:33,571 --> 00:05:34,831
What?
109
00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:36,877
Uh, you're wearing
a hockey jersey,
110
00:05:36,922 --> 00:05:39,142
you're going to
a Pink Floyd laser show,
111
00:05:39,185 --> 00:05:41,185
and you just made a pun
about planets.
112
00:05:41,231 --> 00:05:43,531
Come on, man,
I thought it was "punny."
113
00:05:45,714 --> 00:05:47,194
Okay, it's official,
114
00:05:47,237 --> 00:05:49,897
you are turning into
a very tan Dave.
115
00:05:49,935 --> 00:05:53,065
I am not turning into Dave.
116
00:05:53,112 --> 00:05:55,502
So you're saying
you're a Pink Floyd fan?
117
00:05:55,550 --> 00:05:58,340
Yeah, all his new stuff
is great.
118
00:06:00,555 --> 00:06:03,515
I don't know, Pop, ever since
you and Dave became friends,
119
00:06:03,558 --> 00:06:05,298
you are kind of
a different person.
120
00:06:05,342 --> 00:06:06,772
MARTY:
Yeah, you don't go to
121
00:06:06,822 --> 00:06:09,082
Ernie's anymore, you don't
play dominoes with the boys,
122
00:06:09,128 --> 00:06:11,438
and just the other day
I saw you put a quarter
123
00:06:11,479 --> 00:06:13,399
in someone else's
parking meter.
124
00:06:13,437 --> 00:06:15,437
It's called paying it forward,
125
00:06:15,483 --> 00:06:18,613
which also happens to be
an excellent movie.
126
00:06:18,660 --> 00:06:21,540
Okay, who are you, and what
have you done with our father?
127
00:06:23,142 --> 00:06:24,572
Man, y'all tripping.
128
00:06:24,622 --> 00:06:26,792
You're just being
a couple of Negative Nancys.
129
00:06:28,060 --> 00:06:30,240
Who said that?
130
00:06:31,629 --> 00:06:33,459
Did you see
the bathroom?
131
00:06:33,501 --> 00:06:36,451
I mean, if this isn't
the nicest hotel I've ever seen,
132
00:06:36,504 --> 00:06:38,284
then my name isn't
Mary J. Blige.
133
00:06:39,681 --> 00:06:41,981
Your name isn't Mary J. Blige.
134
00:06:43,075 --> 00:06:44,685
It's Tina J. Liar.
135
00:06:46,514 --> 00:06:49,254
Oh, come on, Gemma,
we're not hurting anyone.
136
00:06:49,299 --> 00:06:52,049
I know, but aren't you worried
about getting caught?
137
00:06:52,084 --> 00:06:53,474
A little,
138
00:06:53,521 --> 00:06:56,741
but I think those free
massages they're sending up
139
00:06:56,785 --> 00:06:58,965
will melt those worries away.
140
00:06:59,004 --> 00:07:01,354
Wait, when did you
arrange that?
141
00:07:01,398 --> 00:07:04,318
I didn't,
my publicist did.
142
00:07:04,357 --> 00:07:06,277
And if anyone asks you,
you're my publicist.
143
00:07:06,316 --> 00:07:09,146
No. Tina,
144
00:07:09,188 --> 00:07:11,188
we are never gonna be able
to pull this off.
145
00:07:11,234 --> 00:07:13,584
Just because one guy thought
you were Mary J. Blige
146
00:07:13,628 --> 00:07:15,418
doesn't mean you can fool
a whole hotel.
147
00:07:15,456 --> 00:07:17,236
Of white people?
148
00:07:18,589 --> 00:07:20,329
Honey, I could tell them
I was Martin Luther King,
149
00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:21,593
and they'd believe it.
150
00:07:23,202 --> 00:07:25,072
All this free stuff
just doesn't
151
00:07:25,117 --> 00:07:26,727
seem like it's worth the risk.
152
00:07:26,771 --> 00:07:29,641
Gemma, this is
not about free stuff.
153
00:07:29,687 --> 00:07:30,867
Then what is it?
154
00:07:30,906 --> 00:07:33,086
Well, I know this
may sound silly,
155
00:07:33,125 --> 00:07:34,825
but ever since
I was a little girl,
156
00:07:34,866 --> 00:07:37,176
I always wanted to be
a famous singer,
157
00:07:37,216 --> 00:07:40,306
and now for the next
couple of days, I can be.
158
00:07:40,350 --> 00:07:41,960
I mean, didn't you ever
dream like that?
159
00:07:42,004 --> 00:07:44,394
Yes.
160
00:07:45,660 --> 00:07:47,620
Back when I was growing up
in Hickory Corners,
161
00:07:47,662 --> 00:07:51,222
I always dreamed of being
the Fall Festival Hog Queen.
162
00:07:53,319 --> 00:07:55,279
What is that and why?
163
00:07:55,321 --> 00:07:57,541
It is the biggest honor in town.
164
00:07:57,585 --> 00:08:00,805
You get a sash, a tiara, and
you get to ride down Main Street
165
00:08:00,849 --> 00:08:04,989
on a float pulled
by a team of pigs.
166
00:08:05,027 --> 00:08:07,247
What a relatable story.
167
00:08:07,290 --> 00:08:09,170
I would've won, too.
168
00:08:09,205 --> 00:08:11,685
I crushed
the bacon-eating contest,
169
00:08:11,729 --> 00:08:15,869
but that damn greased pig
got away from me every time.
170
00:08:15,907 --> 00:08:18,087
Gemma, I never thought
I would say this,
171
00:08:18,127 --> 00:08:21,177
but being
Mary J. Blige...
172
00:08:22,827 --> 00:08:25,137
...is my greased pig.
173
00:08:32,228 --> 00:08:35,448
BOTH:
Morning.
174
00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:44,590
Hey, look at that.
175
00:08:44,632 --> 00:08:48,372
Great minds dress alike.We're not dressed alike.
176
00:08:48,418 --> 00:08:50,688
My shirt has little
blue squares, and yours has, um,
177
00:08:50,725 --> 00:08:53,425
little blue boxes.
178
00:08:53,466 --> 00:08:55,906
I don't know.
179
00:08:55,947 --> 00:08:57,387
Looks pretty
similar to me.
180
00:08:57,427 --> 00:08:59,297
Yeah, well, no one else
would think that.
181
00:08:59,342 --> 00:09:03,562
Look at you two, twinsies!
182
00:09:11,006 --> 00:09:14,836
Hey, what's up,
boys?
183
00:09:14,879 --> 00:09:16,319
Well, what is up
with you,
184
00:09:16,359 --> 00:09:19,239
Run-DMC, you're having
a midlife crisis?
185
00:09:19,275 --> 00:09:22,665
Very funny.
For your information,
186
00:09:22,713 --> 00:09:25,063
I'm kicking it
with my old dance crew tonight.
187
00:09:25,107 --> 00:09:27,847
Your old dance crew?
188
00:09:27,892 --> 00:09:29,892
Didn't Keith just
have hip surgery?
189
00:09:29,938 --> 00:09:33,118
Yeah. You know, he's still got
his handicap placard,
190
00:09:33,158 --> 00:09:36,078
so we get to park
right in front of the club.
191
00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:37,558
But I thought you were
supposed to go
192
00:09:37,598 --> 00:09:38,988
to the planetarium
tonight?
193
00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:41,424
Yeah, man, but those planets
gonna be there forever.
194
00:09:41,471 --> 00:09:44,251
Keith's handicap placard,
it expires next week.
195
00:09:46,084 --> 00:09:49,474
Come on, Pop, is this because we
teased you about becoming Dave?
196
00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:54,132
No. This is about me getting
back in touch with my roots,
197
00:09:54,179 --> 00:09:55,839
about not forgetting who I am.
198
00:09:55,877 --> 00:09:57,877
And who exactly
is that?
199
00:09:57,922 --> 00:10:01,222
Calvi-tronic,
the Bionic Breaking Machine.
200
00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:12,243
Oh.
201
00:10:12,284 --> 00:10:13,984
I don't know about
a breaking machine,
202
00:10:14,025 --> 00:10:15,985
but something just
broke inside of me.
203
00:10:17,899 --> 00:10:21,729
Uh-oh, there's Dave.
What you gonna tell him?
204
00:10:21,772 --> 00:10:24,552
I'm a grown-ass man.
205
00:10:24,601 --> 00:10:25,991
I'm not afraid
206
00:10:26,037 --> 00:10:28,347
to tell him what's what.
207
00:10:28,387 --> 00:10:30,387
I'm gonna tell him
I'm sick.
208
00:10:32,827 --> 00:10:36,177
Hey, Calvin. You
ready to roll?
209
00:10:36,221 --> 00:10:38,521
Nice blanket. I have
one just like it.
210
00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:41,131
Can't go tonight, man.
I'm sick.
211
00:10:41,183 --> 00:10:42,483
Oh, no.
212
00:10:42,532 --> 00:10:44,312
Got sick at the hockey game.
213
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,540
It was really cold
in there, man.
214
00:10:52,847 --> 00:10:53,937
Really? You know,
215
00:10:53,978 --> 00:10:55,588
they keep the rink
at 65 degrees.
216
00:10:55,632 --> 00:10:58,152
I know, but for black people,
that's like 32.
217
00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:01,950
Okay, well, feel
better, buddy.Yeah.
218
00:11:01,986 --> 00:11:05,296
Bye, guys. Okay...
219
00:11:05,337 --> 00:11:07,427
Damn, Pop,
that was cold.
220
00:11:07,470 --> 00:11:09,390
I know.
221
00:11:09,428 --> 00:11:11,258
32 degrees, baby.
222
00:11:17,045 --> 00:11:21,265
Ooh, that was an
amazing massage.
223
00:11:21,310 --> 00:11:22,400
Not as good
as the one yesterday,
224
00:11:22,441 --> 00:11:24,791
but better than the one
this morning.
225
00:11:24,835 --> 00:11:27,445
It was pretty great.
226
00:11:27,490 --> 00:11:29,710
But do you feel like
we're taking advantage?
227
00:11:30,972 --> 00:11:33,232
Ooh, yay! That must be
our second lobsters.
228
00:11:33,278 --> 00:11:35,548
Hi, Jeffrey.
229
00:11:35,585 --> 00:11:37,235
Hi. This is awkward, but...
230
00:11:37,282 --> 00:11:39,672
We can explain. I wanted
to be Hog Queen.
231
00:11:41,069 --> 00:11:44,729
Don't... don't
mind my publicist.
232
00:11:44,768 --> 00:11:46,428
She has a pill problem.
233
00:11:48,206 --> 00:11:49,816
So what can we do for you?
234
00:11:49,860 --> 00:11:52,650
Well, one of our guests
is celebrating her birthday
235
00:11:52,689 --> 00:11:55,349
later tonight in the lounge,
and I was hoping...
236
00:11:55,387 --> 00:11:58,307
that Ms. Blige could pop by
for a quick hello.
237
00:11:58,347 --> 00:12:00,347
Okay, honey,
238
00:12:00,392 --> 00:12:02,952
that sounds like fun.Oh, and you know
239
00:12:03,004 --> 00:12:05,484
what would be even more fun?
If she sings "Happy Birthday."
240
00:12:05,528 --> 00:12:06,878
Oh, yeah,
that'd be real...
241
00:12:06,921 --> 00:12:08,091
Wait, what?!
242
00:12:09,184 --> 00:12:12,054
Oh, that is so amazing.
Thank you.
243
00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:13,980
I am much obliged.
244
00:12:14,015 --> 00:12:15,185
You see
what I did there?
245
00:12:15,233 --> 00:12:16,193
Did you see it?
Fun.
246
00:12:16,234 --> 00:12:18,624
Okay.
247
00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:20,541
What the hell, Gemma?
248
00:12:20,586 --> 00:12:22,286
How tight is
that towel?
249
00:12:23,459 --> 00:12:25,159
Tina. Don't you see?
250
00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:26,470
This is your dream.
251
00:12:26,505 --> 00:12:28,245
Tonight's your night
to be famous.
252
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:30,170
Yeah, but as soon
as I open my mouth,
253
00:12:30,205 --> 00:12:32,645
they're gonna know
that I'm not Mary J. Blige.
254
00:12:32,685 --> 00:12:35,995
No, they won't.
You have an amazing voice.
255
00:12:36,037 --> 00:12:38,607
Yeah.
But still!
256
00:12:38,648 --> 00:12:42,258
Besides, it's like you said,
this is a winery.
257
00:12:42,304 --> 00:12:44,824
Everyone here is whiter
than the chardonnay.
258
00:12:44,872 --> 00:12:48,262
Well, it does sound
kind of fun.
259
00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:50,190
Now you're talking.
260
00:12:50,225 --> 00:12:52,405
And, hey, maybe I could be
your backup singer.
261
00:12:52,444 --> 00:12:54,444
Stay in your lane, pig girl.
262
00:12:57,885 --> 00:13:00,455
Oh, hey, uh, Dave.
263
00:13:00,496 --> 00:13:03,196
I thought you were going
to the planetarium.
264
00:13:03,238 --> 00:13:05,418
Well, I was, but I realized
it wouldn't be as much fun
265
00:13:05,457 --> 00:13:07,287
without Calvin, so I decided
to stay home
266
00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:08,549
and make him some soup.
267
00:13:08,591 --> 00:13:09,541
How's he doing?
268
00:13:09,592 --> 00:13:12,112
Better.Worse.
269
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:13,560
Well, which is it?
270
00:13:13,596 --> 00:13:15,376
Worse.Better.
271
00:13:16,904 --> 00:13:19,864
Okay, well, uh, maybe
the soup will help.Yeah.
272
00:13:19,907 --> 00:13:22,297
Just tell him I'll check in
on him tomorrow.
273
00:13:27,131 --> 00:13:28,341
Yeah.
274
00:13:30,265 --> 00:13:31,655
Hey.
275
00:13:35,357 --> 00:13:37,097
Calvin, what are you doing
out of bed,
276
00:13:37,141 --> 00:13:38,791
and why are you dressed
so funky fresh?
277
00:13:38,839 --> 00:13:40,979
Uh,
278
00:13:41,015 --> 00:13:42,755
I went to the drugstore
to get some medicine.
279
00:13:42,799 --> 00:13:44,329
Where is it?
280
00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:46,626
Damn it, I knew
I forgot something.
281
00:13:47,673 --> 00:13:49,373
Hold on.
282
00:13:49,414 --> 00:13:52,194
Calvin, did you lie to me
about being sick?
283
00:13:52,243 --> 00:13:54,983
No. Because I amsick.
284
00:13:55,029 --> 00:13:56,559
I let down my defenses
285
00:13:56,595 --> 00:14:00,035
and got all infected
with your Dave-ness.
286
00:14:01,513 --> 00:14:03,033
Wh-- Infected?
287
00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:05,350
Yeah, I mean, you got
me going to hockey.
288
00:14:05,387 --> 00:14:07,437
I mean, you and I
are dressing alike.
289
00:14:07,476 --> 00:14:09,526
The other day
a Taylor Swift song came on,
290
00:14:09,565 --> 00:14:11,435
and I didn't even turn it off.
291
00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:14,440
Actually,
he turned it up.
292
00:14:17,268 --> 00:14:20,278
I didn't know having things
in common was being infected.
293
00:14:20,315 --> 00:14:22,275
I thought that
was being friends.
294
00:14:22,317 --> 00:14:24,447
Uh...
295
00:14:24,493 --> 00:14:25,843
Dave.No, you know
what, Calvin?
296
00:14:25,886 --> 00:14:27,456
You said your piece.
Enjoy the soup.
297
00:14:27,496 --> 00:14:30,496
It's infected,
too. With love!
298
00:14:34,982 --> 00:14:37,892
Ooh... thank you for
making me do this, Gemma.
299
00:14:37,941 --> 00:14:39,891
I'm feeling
kind of hyped.
300
00:14:39,943 --> 00:14:42,463
Oh, good.
You're here.
301
00:14:42,511 --> 00:14:44,551
Thank you again
for doing this, Ms. Blige.
302
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:46,080
Okay.
So the birthday girl's name
303
00:14:46,123 --> 00:14:47,603
is Cynthia,
and she is sitting
304
00:14:47,646 --> 00:14:48,516
right over there.
305
00:14:51,912 --> 00:14:54,432
She is not going
to believe this!
306
00:14:54,479 --> 00:14:57,139
No, she is not.
307
00:14:57,178 --> 00:15:01,228
Okay, so I'm gonna go
introduce you. Showtime!
308
00:15:02,618 --> 00:15:04,488
Tina, they're not white!
309
00:15:04,533 --> 00:15:05,533
They're gonna know.
310
00:15:05,577 --> 00:15:07,757
Okay. All right.
Gemma...
311
00:15:07,797 --> 00:15:09,017
let's get the
hell out of here.
312
00:15:09,059 --> 00:15:11,069
Ladies and gentlemen,
the one and only
313
00:15:11,105 --> 00:15:12,585
Mary J. Blige!
314
00:15:12,628 --> 00:15:15,288
Oh... Gemma.
315
00:15:17,285 --> 00:15:18,585
How you doing?
316
00:15:18,634 --> 00:15:20,674
Oh, what the
hell are we gonna do?
317
00:15:20,723 --> 00:15:22,983
Okay. Okay.
It's gonna be fine.
318
00:15:23,030 --> 00:15:24,040
You're gonna
go up there,
319
00:15:24,074 --> 00:15:25,684
you're gonna
sing your heart out,
320
00:15:25,728 --> 00:15:27,998
and you're gonna
live your dream. Okay?
321
00:15:28,035 --> 00:15:29,425
You're right.
You're right.
322
00:15:29,471 --> 00:15:30,421
This is my chance.
Yes.
323
00:15:30,472 --> 00:15:31,602
I got this.
324
00:15:31,647 --> 00:15:32,907
But just in case...
325
00:15:34,606 --> 00:15:37,476
It'll be harder to describe me
to the police.
326
00:15:40,090 --> 00:15:41,840
Oh, thank you.
Thank you so much.
327
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:44,314
Hey, how you doing?
328
00:15:44,355 --> 00:15:46,485
Well, this song goes out
329
00:15:46,531 --> 00:15:48,091
to my girl Cynthia.
330
00:15:52,494 --> 00:15:55,844
♪ Happy birthday
331
00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:57,848
♪ To you
332
00:16:00,719 --> 00:16:01,809
♪ Happy
333
00:16:01,851 --> 00:16:04,721
♪ Birthday to
334
00:16:04,767 --> 00:16:07,117
♪ You
335
00:16:07,161 --> 00:16:10,551
♪ Happy birthday
336
00:16:10,599 --> 00:16:12,779
♪ Dear Cynthia
337
00:16:14,385 --> 00:16:18,085
♪ Happy birthday
338
00:16:18,128 --> 00:16:20,738
♪ To
339
00:16:20,783 --> 00:16:23,213
♪ You.
340
00:16:27,094 --> 00:16:28,314
Thank you.
341
00:16:28,356 --> 00:16:30,486
Thank you so much,
Ms. Blige.
342
00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:32,142
That was
simply beautiful.
343
00:16:32,186 --> 00:16:33,576
Awesome. I'm not done yet.
344
00:16:33,622 --> 00:16:37,362
"Family Affair," hit it!
345
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:42,550
♪ Yeah, yeah
346
00:16:42,587 --> 00:16:44,377
♪ Oh, yeah
347
00:16:44,415 --> 00:16:47,545
♪ Come on, everybody!
348
00:16:47,592 --> 00:16:48,542
Isn't she amazing?
349
00:16:48,593 --> 00:16:50,553
She is.
350
00:16:50,595 --> 00:16:52,855
But she sure as hell
ain't Mary J. Blige.
351
00:16:54,991 --> 00:16:57,121
Okay, look.
She's my best friend,
352
00:16:57,167 --> 00:16:58,777
and she's up there
living her dream.
353
00:16:58,821 --> 00:16:59,821
So?
354
00:16:59,865 --> 00:17:01,735
So, if you don't rat us out,
355
00:17:01,780 --> 00:17:03,400
you can have
our penthouse suite,
356
00:17:03,434 --> 00:17:05,264
all the massages
we have scheduled for tomorrow,
357
00:17:05,306 --> 00:17:06,486
and...
358
00:17:07,612 --> 00:17:08,652
68 bucks.
359
00:17:12,139 --> 00:17:15,359
ALL:
Go, Mary! Go, Mary! Go, Mary!
360
00:17:15,403 --> 00:17:17,923
♪ Let's get it crunk upon
361
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,370
♪ Have fun upon
up in this dancery ♪
362
00:17:20,408 --> 00:17:23,718
♪ We got ya open,
now you're floatin' ♪
363
00:17:23,759 --> 00:17:25,849
♪ So you gots to dance for me
364
00:17:25,891 --> 00:17:28,371
♪ Don't need no hateration
365
00:17:28,416 --> 00:17:30,986
♪ Holleration in this dancery
366
00:17:31,027 --> 00:17:33,507
♪ Let's get it percolatin',
while you're... ♪
367
00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:37,648
Hey, Dave.
368
00:17:37,686 --> 00:17:38,946
Yeah, careful, Calvin.
369
00:17:38,991 --> 00:17:40,511
You don't want
to catch anything else.
370
00:17:40,558 --> 00:17:43,388
I've been told my laugh
is pretty contagious.
371
00:17:43,431 --> 00:17:45,341
Look, man...
372
00:17:45,389 --> 00:17:46,959
I'm sorry if I hurt
your feelings,
373
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:49,399
but I just felt like
your Dave-ness
374
00:17:49,437 --> 00:17:51,527
was rubbing off on me too much.
375
00:17:51,569 --> 00:17:53,099
Well, what's wrong with that?
376
00:17:53,136 --> 00:17:55,396
Why can't friends
rub off on each other?
377
00:17:57,358 --> 00:18:00,448
Rubbing off on people
is completely natural.
378
00:18:00,491 --> 00:18:02,491
I welcome people
rubbing off on me.
379
00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:08,160
If anybody's listening,
we're just neighbors!
380
00:18:08,195 --> 00:18:10,765
I just don't understand
why it's such a bad thing
381
00:18:10,806 --> 00:18:13,196
for friends to
influence each other.
382
00:18:13,243 --> 00:18:15,073
You don't think that I've
changed because of you?
383
00:18:15,115 --> 00:18:16,765
How have youchanged?
384
00:18:16,812 --> 00:18:18,592
I'm more assertive,
like you,
385
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,390
I'm more confident,
like you,
386
00:18:20,424 --> 00:18:22,294
and if someone's being
a jackass, I now tell them
387
00:18:22,339 --> 00:18:23,689
they're being
a jackass...
388
00:18:23,732 --> 00:18:25,902
jackass.
389
00:18:25,951 --> 00:18:27,601
One more compliment like that,
390
00:18:27,649 --> 00:18:29,049
and we're gonna have a problem.
391
00:18:29,085 --> 00:18:31,825
Calvin, we already
do have a problem.
392
00:18:31,870 --> 00:18:33,440
Why would I want to be
friends with someone
393
00:18:33,481 --> 00:18:36,221
who thinks being me
is such a bad thing?
394
00:18:36,266 --> 00:18:37,576
'Cause I'm dope.
395
00:18:37,615 --> 00:18:41,315
And your attitude--
it's... wickity-wack.
396
00:18:42,751 --> 00:18:47,491
Look, Dave, I don't think
being you is a bad thing.
397
00:18:47,538 --> 00:18:49,198
All right, you're a good dude.
398
00:18:49,236 --> 00:18:51,416
But Calvin Butler has an edge.
399
00:18:51,455 --> 00:18:53,935
And around here,
people see me a certain way,
400
00:18:53,979 --> 00:18:55,509
and I don't want to lose that.
401
00:18:55,546 --> 00:18:56,896
Fine, but don't blame me
402
00:18:56,939 --> 00:18:59,899
because Taylor Swift sang
her way into your heart.
403
00:18:59,942 --> 00:19:02,502
I don't know what it is,
she just gets me.
404
00:19:04,947 --> 00:19:06,467
But you're right.
405
00:19:06,514 --> 00:19:11,174
I shouldn't have done that,
and, uh... I'm sorry.
406
00:19:12,389 --> 00:19:15,529
You know what?
It, it's okay.
407
00:19:15,566 --> 00:19:17,616
You know what's better
than okay?
408
00:19:17,655 --> 00:19:19,355
That soup you made.
409
00:19:21,572 --> 00:19:23,662
I knewyou'd like it.
410
00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:25,615
I used the parsnips we got
from the farmers market.
411
00:19:25,663 --> 00:19:27,223
Oh, yeah, right.
From the lady...
412
00:19:27,274 --> 00:19:30,184
BOTH:
With the yellow overalls.
413
00:19:30,233 --> 00:19:32,663
No, that's too much.Yeah, this is
getting weird. Okay.
414
00:19:42,158 --> 00:19:44,248
Hey, man. We were
in the middle of a game.
415
00:19:44,291 --> 00:19:45,461
Not anymore.
416
00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:48,469
It's been canceled
on the account of dance.
417
00:19:49,470 --> 00:19:51,560
Oh, come on, Dad.
We don't want to see
418
00:19:51,602 --> 00:19:53,212
your tired old dance moves.
419
00:19:53,256 --> 00:19:56,346
Yeah. And I'm not
helping you up this time.
420
00:19:56,390 --> 00:19:59,530
Nah, man. What you're about
to see is all new.
421
00:19:59,567 --> 00:20:00,747
Yo, D-Money!
422
00:20:10,491 --> 00:20:12,921
Let's get stupid.
423
00:20:14,059 --> 00:20:15,059
♪ Uh!
424
00:20:17,976 --> 00:20:18,976
♪ Uh!
425
00:20:21,632 --> 00:20:23,762
♪ Uh!
426
00:20:26,333 --> 00:20:27,283
♪ Uh!
427
00:20:29,771 --> 00:20:31,251
♪ Uh!
428
00:20:37,344 --> 00:20:39,864
Are-are we gonna sit here
and watch this?
429
00:20:39,911 --> 00:20:41,691
Hell no.
430
00:20:41,739 --> 00:20:43,479
Let's battle these fools.
431
00:20:43,524 --> 00:20:45,524
♪ Uh!
432
00:20:47,876 --> 00:20:49,446
♪ Uh!
433
00:20:53,011 --> 00:20:54,491
♪ Uh!
434
00:20:56,232 --> 00:20:57,712
♪ Uh!
435
00:20:58,713 --> 00:20:59,713
♪ Uh!
436
00:21:02,107 --> 00:21:03,587
♪ Uh!
437
00:21:03,631 --> 00:21:05,581
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
438
00:21:05,633 --> 00:21:08,723
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org