1 00:00:02,364 --> 00:00:04,014 Dave, slow down. 2 00:00:04,042 --> 00:00:05,062 I'm just excited. 3 00:00:05,396 --> 00:00:08,356 I know, but you're running like you're about to miss a flight. 4 00:00:08,380 --> 00:00:11,650 Ooh, I have never missed a flight and I never will. 5 00:00:13,852 --> 00:00:15,962 You are weirdly arrogant about that. 6 00:00:20,325 --> 00:00:21,725 Hey, Calvin. 7 00:00:21,793 --> 00:00:24,763 Hey, Dave. Gemma. 8 00:00:25,134 --> 00:00:27,784 We just wanted to swing by and drop off one of these. 9 00:00:27,892 --> 00:00:29,312 What's this? 10 00:00:29,338 --> 00:00:31,458 It's an invitation to our housewarming party. 11 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:32,990 Yeah, it's gonna be awesome. 12 00:00:33,014 --> 00:00:34,584 I can see, it says it right here. 13 00:00:34,608 --> 00:00:36,218 "It's gonna be awesome." 14 00:00:36,695 --> 00:00:39,985 Yeah, well, uh, it's in all caps so you know it's true. 15 00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:41,908 We thought a party would be a great way 16 00:00:41,933 --> 00:00:43,293 to get to know some of our new neighbors. 17 00:00:43,324 --> 00:00:44,724 Yeah, become a part of the community, 18 00:00:44,755 --> 00:00:46,485 but in an awesome way. 19 00:00:47,333 --> 00:00:48,693 Yeah, that's great. 20 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,220 Too bad I can't make it. 21 00:00:50,237 --> 00:00:51,717 Well, you haven't even looked at when it is. 22 00:00:51,741 --> 00:00:55,051 Eh. Yep, I can't make it. 23 00:00:56,726 --> 00:00:58,086 Why not? 24 00:00:58,114 --> 00:01:00,804 Well, you know, the first Saturday of every month 25 00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:03,628 is, uh, dart night down at Ernie's Hot Spot. 26 00:01:03,652 --> 00:01:05,352 Can't you just skip it this one time? 27 00:01:05,376 --> 00:01:06,286 Yeah. It's gonna be a great party. 28 00:01:06,311 --> 00:01:08,581 Gemma, tell him what they used to call me back in Michigan. 29 00:01:08,729 --> 00:01:11,209 - The Party King of Kalamazoo. - The... 30 00:01:11,234 --> 00:01:14,744 Okay. I didn't know I was in the presence of royalty. 31 00:01:15,130 --> 00:01:17,140 Will you tell Tina and the boys? 32 00:01:17,158 --> 00:01:18,378 Sure. 33 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,100 Hey, uh, Calvin. 34 00:01:20,406 --> 00:01:23,186 Don't go down to the bar and throw darts. 35 00:01:23,211 --> 00:01:26,961 Come to the party and... and throw down. 36 00:01:29,314 --> 00:01:31,364 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 37 00:01:31,393 --> 00:01:32,333 ♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪ 38 00:01:32,363 --> 00:01:36,173 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.addic7ed.com - 39 00:01:36,198 --> 00:01:38,048 Do I have to go to a sleepover? 40 00:01:38,069 --> 00:01:39,569 I want to stay for the party. 41 00:01:39,638 --> 00:01:41,238 Oh, baby, you wouldn't like it. 42 00:01:41,257 --> 00:01:43,107 It's just gonna be a bunch of boring grown-ups 43 00:01:43,132 --> 00:01:45,412 talking about boring grown-up stuff. 44 00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:47,738 A little help with the beer pong table? 45 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,180 Why are you bringing that in here? 46 00:01:51,201 --> 00:01:52,741 Well, it's a party, it's supposed to be fun. 47 00:01:52,770 --> 00:01:54,760 I know, but it's a housewarming, 48 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:57,171 not some rager that gets you kicked off campus. 49 00:01:57,202 --> 00:01:58,112 Okay. 50 00:01:58,495 --> 00:01:59,815 That was not my fault. 51 00:01:59,836 --> 00:02:01,496 They told me those goats were trained. 52 00:02:02,510 --> 00:02:03,950 Sweetie, relax. 53 00:02:03,971 --> 00:02:05,941 This is just gonna be a tasteful evening 54 00:02:05,973 --> 00:02:07,433 of getting to know our new neighbors. 55 00:02:07,463 --> 00:02:10,333 Ugh. But that's boring grown-up stuff. 56 00:02:10,921 --> 00:02:13,191 You're right, Mom. I'll skip this one. 57 00:02:13,778 --> 00:02:15,728 Why are you changing the plan all of a sudden? 58 00:02:15,753 --> 00:02:17,843 - Is this because of Calvin? - Calvin? 59 00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:19,871 I didn't say anything about Calvin. You said Calvin. 60 00:02:19,898 --> 00:02:21,988 If anyone's obsessed with Calvin, it's you. 61 00:02:23,747 --> 00:02:25,597 He told us he already has plans. 62 00:02:25,624 --> 00:02:26,744 I know. 63 00:02:26,770 --> 00:02:28,450 To play darts. 64 00:02:28,466 --> 00:02:31,666 It's like he thinks our party's gonna be lame. 65 00:02:31,851 --> 00:02:35,431 Why would he think that, Party King of Kalamazoo? 66 00:02:37,860 --> 00:02:40,240 I don't get it. Every time I try to be his friend 67 00:02:40,264 --> 00:02:42,214 he throws it back in my face. 68 00:02:42,237 --> 00:02:43,707 You know, we're next-door neighbors. 69 00:02:43,728 --> 00:02:45,388 We are supposed to get along. 70 00:02:45,691 --> 00:02:47,811 Well, instead of throwing this party for the neighbors 71 00:02:47,838 --> 00:02:50,428 who don't want to come, maybe you should be throwing it 72 00:02:50,453 --> 00:02:52,493 for the neighbors who do. 73 00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:54,731 I am. 74 00:02:54,956 --> 00:02:57,376 I just hope they tell Calvin about it. 75 00:03:00,338 --> 00:03:03,778 Oh, man, I can't believe you're really not coming to this party. 76 00:03:03,798 --> 00:03:05,288 And I can't believe that you want me to miss 77 00:03:05,309 --> 00:03:07,139 dart night at Ernie's. 78 00:03:07,165 --> 00:03:08,535 It's a beautiful tradition. 79 00:03:08,559 --> 00:03:11,479 The only reason you like going is to hustle people at darts. 80 00:03:11,498 --> 00:03:13,118 It's a beautiful tradition. 81 00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:16,260 Well, I'm looking forward to the party. 82 00:03:16,277 --> 00:03:18,077 Ooh. I bet they're gonna have a signature cocktail 83 00:03:18,102 --> 00:03:21,332 with a clever name like, like, "Gemma and Juice." 84 00:03:21,362 --> 00:03:23,392 Or, or-or, 85 00:03:23,418 --> 00:03:26,928 - uh, "Fuzzy Davel." Yeah? - (LAUGHS) 86 00:03:27,463 --> 00:03:29,873 Ah, baby, why don't you make an exception this one time? 87 00:03:29,902 --> 00:03:31,982 Hey, look, I'll two-step with you. 88 00:03:32,006 --> 00:03:33,906 To what? Taylor Swift? 89 00:03:36,236 --> 00:03:37,776 So that's what it is. 90 00:03:37,802 --> 00:03:38,602 You don't want to go 'cause this is gonna 91 00:03:38,627 --> 00:03:40,307 be a white people party. 92 00:03:40,332 --> 00:03:41,712 No, I don't want to go 93 00:03:41,738 --> 00:03:43,668 because I don't want Dave using me 94 00:03:43,686 --> 00:03:45,756 like he's using all of y'all to legitimize 95 00:03:45,784 --> 00:03:47,794 his lame-ass party. 96 00:03:48,846 --> 00:03:50,716 Come on, Pop. He's not using us. 97 00:03:50,738 --> 00:03:51,798 Y'all don't get it. 98 00:03:51,817 --> 00:03:53,867 See, the Johnsons are like the pilgrims. 99 00:03:53,895 --> 00:03:57,145 - Uh, uh, no, hang on. - (ALL GROANING) 100 00:03:57,982 --> 00:04:02,232 Look, they need the natives, i.e. us, 101 00:04:02,860 --> 00:04:04,760 to navigate through the cold winter, 102 00:04:04,785 --> 00:04:07,565 i.e. their corny-ass party. 103 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:10,596 They think that they can 104 00:04:10,621 --> 00:04:13,341 come onto our land, plant their flag 105 00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:15,785 and then claim this neighborhood as their own. 106 00:04:15,807 --> 00:04:17,307 (LAUGHS) Look at you. 107 00:04:17,331 --> 00:04:19,701 You a perm away from being Al Sharpton. 108 00:04:20,964 --> 00:04:22,994 Come on, boys. 109 00:04:25,260 --> 00:04:27,270 Hey, look, you two. Unlike your father, 110 00:04:27,294 --> 00:04:29,044 we're here to have a good time, 111 00:04:29,072 --> 00:04:31,012 support our new neighbors and show them 112 00:04:31,042 --> 00:04:32,942 what this community is about, okay? 113 00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:35,823 Perfect timing, you guys. We're just getting started. 114 00:04:35,853 --> 00:04:38,683 All right. (CHUCKLES) 115 00:04:38,977 --> 00:04:41,867 ♪ All right now ♪ 116 00:04:41,893 --> 00:04:45,493 ♪ Baby, it's all right now... ♪ 117 00:04:45,524 --> 00:04:46,974 Ten minutes, and we out of here. 118 00:04:47,004 --> 00:04:48,964 Yeah. 119 00:04:49,257 --> 00:04:52,687 ♪ Baby, it's all right now... ♪ 120 00:04:52,854 --> 00:04:55,774 So then, I had a cortisone shot 121 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,340 in my left hip. 122 00:04:58,695 --> 00:05:01,425 And that didn't do nothing but make me mad. 123 00:05:02,518 --> 00:05:05,968 Well, that was a long answer for "What time did you get here?" 124 00:05:07,243 --> 00:05:09,073 Hey, here's your drink, Ma. 125 00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:10,901 Ugh, please let this be strong. 126 00:05:10,930 --> 00:05:12,100 (CHUCKLES) 127 00:05:12,121 --> 00:05:14,071 It's nice to see you, Miss Kim. 128 00:05:14,099 --> 00:05:16,609 You too, Malcolm. 129 00:05:16,633 --> 00:05:18,273 Mm-mm! 130 00:05:18,298 --> 00:05:22,148 Haven't you grown all big and handsome? 131 00:05:23,798 --> 00:05:25,298 Yeah, I'm gonna some more of this. 132 00:05:25,324 --> 00:05:28,084 (LAUGHS) Mom, do not leave me. 133 00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:30,110 Well, you said you wanted to meet a girl. 134 00:05:32,172 --> 00:05:33,852 Yeah, but not a Golden Girl. 135 00:05:35,700 --> 00:05:37,670 Oh, I love these cocktails, Gemma. 136 00:05:37,694 --> 00:05:39,434 Your name is Johnson, 137 00:05:39,463 --> 00:05:40,943 - Johnsangria. - (LAUGHS) 138 00:05:40,969 --> 00:05:42,929 It was there the whole time. 139 00:05:43,533 --> 00:05:45,893 It's basically white wine, pomegranate juice 140 00:05:45,918 --> 00:05:46,838 and fresh fruit. 141 00:05:46,863 --> 00:05:48,683 Ah, and in a mason jar. 142 00:05:48,712 --> 00:05:51,212 Ah, it's like a real-life Pinterest post. 143 00:05:51,236 --> 00:05:53,326 (LAUGHS): Yes. 144 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,963 Uh, hey, sweetie, can I grab you for just a second? 145 00:05:55,987 --> 00:05:57,837 Oh, go ahead, I'll just have some of these, uh, 146 00:05:57,863 --> 00:06:00,023 cut-up veggies you've labeled "crudité." 147 00:06:00,052 --> 00:06:02,152 (LAUGHS) 148 00:06:02,183 --> 00:06:04,033 Uh, hey, Gemma? 149 00:06:04,647 --> 00:06:06,467 This party's a disaster. 150 00:06:06,487 --> 00:06:08,327 W-Why isn't anyone here? 151 00:06:08,349 --> 00:06:10,939 Sweetie, relax. It's early still. 152 00:06:10,957 --> 00:06:13,747 And Tina told me maybe some people are on CP time. 153 00:06:15,762 --> 00:06:17,142 What's that? 154 00:06:17,597 --> 00:06:20,757 I don't know. I think it means cool people time. 155 00:06:24,060 --> 00:06:27,780 Well, how do we let all the cool people know 156 00:06:27,798 --> 00:06:29,688 that the party's ready to get started? 157 00:06:31,071 --> 00:06:32,431 I got it. 158 00:06:32,463 --> 00:06:35,773 Oh, my... I'm gonna go put a balloon outside. 159 00:06:39,363 --> 00:06:40,923 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 160 00:06:40,954 --> 00:06:43,294 Cool balloons, Dave. 161 00:06:44,989 --> 00:06:46,889 (ENGINE STARTS) 162 00:06:47,162 --> 00:06:49,482 (LAUGHS) 163 00:06:50,478 --> 00:06:54,488 Yeah, well, you'll be sorry when all the cool people show up! 164 00:06:58,401 --> 00:07:03,891 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 165 00:07:04,482 --> 00:07:07,112 Just so muscular. 166 00:07:07,686 --> 00:07:09,046 Tell me, Malcolm, 167 00:07:09,068 --> 00:07:11,298 what are you doing for a job these days? 168 00:07:11,322 --> 00:07:13,622 Actually, I don't have one, Miss Kim. 169 00:07:13,653 --> 00:07:16,613 Well, you can come to my house. I'll put you to work. 170 00:07:22,198 --> 00:07:24,358 - Hey, uh, uh, Tina? - Hmm? 171 00:07:24,385 --> 00:07:26,775 I need your help. This party is dying. 172 00:07:26,804 --> 00:07:29,364 No. Miss Kim is dying, this party is dead. 173 00:07:31,348 --> 00:07:33,618 Well, what can I do to get this thing going? 174 00:07:34,239 --> 00:07:36,769 Dave, you, you trying to get turnt? 175 00:07:37,766 --> 00:07:40,316 Based on context, yes, I think so. 176 00:07:41,072 --> 00:07:43,212 Okay. All right, Gemma, Marty, Malcolm, 177 00:07:43,244 --> 00:07:44,354 get over here. We're about to 178 00:07:44,376 --> 00:07:45,716 turn this party up. 179 00:07:45,736 --> 00:07:47,686 Uh, but not too much. 180 00:07:47,707 --> 00:07:49,707 I don't want Miss Kim to feel uncomfortable. 181 00:07:49,729 --> 00:07:52,039 Yeah, I don't think that's possible. 182 00:07:54,192 --> 00:07:56,062 Okay, so how turnt are we talking? 183 00:07:56,092 --> 00:07:58,042 Well, totally turnt, all the way turnt. 184 00:07:58,069 --> 00:07:59,389 Turnt over. 185 00:08:00,248 --> 00:08:01,338 Okay, okay. 186 00:08:01,364 --> 00:08:03,404 Well, I'm gonna order some Roscoe's. 187 00:08:03,434 --> 00:08:05,014 Marty, you get on the music, 188 00:08:05,037 --> 00:08:06,647 Malcolm, you start texting folks. 189 00:08:06,675 --> 00:08:08,255 Oh, good, get some females in here 190 00:08:08,277 --> 00:08:10,117 who didn't used to babysit me. 191 00:08:11,712 --> 00:08:14,372 All right, but, uh, for the record, 192 00:08:14,404 --> 00:08:16,354 I was having a lovely time. 193 00:08:17,759 --> 00:08:18,929 Ernie. Oh! 194 00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:20,690 Give me another round for the boys, man. 195 00:08:20,715 --> 00:08:22,145 Uh-oh. 196 00:08:22,175 --> 00:08:24,805 If you buying, that means you lost to them younguns. 197 00:08:24,828 --> 00:08:27,218 Yeah, oh, Teddy got me on the last throw. 198 00:08:27,242 --> 00:08:29,152 Uh-huh. So why are you smiling, then? 199 00:08:29,183 --> 00:08:30,973 Because the next game is for money, 200 00:08:31,003 --> 00:08:32,363 and I'm gonna start throwing with my good hand. 201 00:08:32,394 --> 00:08:34,744 (LAUGHS) All right, then. 202 00:08:34,770 --> 00:08:36,150 There you go. 203 00:08:36,169 --> 00:08:38,239 Uh, how you been, Calvin? 204 00:08:38,265 --> 00:08:40,815 Eh, I can't complain. You know, life is good. 205 00:08:40,838 --> 00:08:42,518 Good enough to finally leave me a tip? 206 00:08:42,541 --> 00:08:44,921 (chuckles) Yeah. Here's a tip: 207 00:08:44,953 --> 00:08:46,543 you're too old for tracksuits. 208 00:08:46,572 --> 00:08:48,792 (LAUGHS) Your wife like it. 209 00:08:48,816 --> 00:08:50,716 - Hey, now... Oh, no, you... - (LAUGHS) 210 00:08:50,741 --> 00:08:52,511 No, you two-faced like that. 211 00:08:52,545 --> 00:08:54,795 Teddy, hold on. Teddy, where you going? 212 00:08:54,818 --> 00:08:56,168 - (PHONES CHIMING, VIBRATING) - What's going on? 213 00:08:56,195 --> 00:08:57,805 - What's happening? - Oh. Looks like 214 00:08:57,828 --> 00:09:00,018 there's a party in the neighborhood 215 00:09:00,038 --> 00:09:06,018 "Free drinks, free food and dope beats by DJ Party Marty." 216 00:09:06,036 --> 00:09:07,696 Where are you going, Ernie? 217 00:09:07,716 --> 00:09:09,346 (EXHALES) This party sounds fly. 218 00:09:09,371 --> 00:09:12,291 I'm closing up and changing into my velour tracksuit. 219 00:09:13,323 --> 00:09:14,983 But you still got customers. 220 00:09:15,011 --> 00:09:15,971 Good point. 221 00:09:15,999 --> 00:09:17,569 Everybody, out! 222 00:09:17,591 --> 00:09:19,991 Uh, no, no, no. Everybody, stay! 223 00:09:20,018 --> 00:09:21,778 There's a party down on Evergreen, 224 00:09:21,803 --> 00:09:24,393 and the booze there is free. 225 00:09:24,601 --> 00:09:27,341 It's free here, too. Next round's on me. 226 00:09:27,724 --> 00:09:31,924 In fact, keep that open all night. 227 00:09:32,230 --> 00:09:35,220 Hey, would you let me know when that get around $50? 228 00:09:36,414 --> 00:09:37,844 TINA: Show me what you got. 229 00:09:37,872 --> 00:09:39,692 Show me... you ain't gonna do nothing. 230 00:09:39,724 --> 00:09:41,774 - Not enough. - (LAUGHS) 231 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,690 This is amazing. I can't believe how many people are here. 232 00:09:44,714 --> 00:09:46,044 Oh, I can. 233 00:09:46,068 --> 00:09:48,718 We're the Butlers. That's how we do. 234 00:09:48,736 --> 00:09:50,436 Boom! 235 00:09:50,461 --> 00:09:53,041 Drink up, sucka. 236 00:09:55,258 --> 00:09:57,478 Come on, man. If you don't get your head in the game, 237 00:09:57,496 --> 00:10:00,776 Miss Kim is gonna start looking like that. Let's go! 238 00:10:00,797 --> 00:10:02,247 - (CLAPS HANDS) - Sweetie? 239 00:10:02,267 --> 00:10:04,457 I'm-I'm sorry, don't you mean Party King? 240 00:10:04,478 --> 00:10:05,448 Hit me, Marty! 241 00:10:05,470 --> 00:10:08,130 (AIR HORN SOUND EFFECT) 242 00:10:08,151 --> 00:10:10,891 (LAUGHS SOFTLY) Don't you think this party's 243 00:10:10,917 --> 00:10:12,047 getting a little out of hand? 244 00:10:12,072 --> 00:10:14,022 I think you've proven your point to Calvin. 245 00:10:14,051 --> 00:10:16,251 Oh, this isn't about Calvin. It's like you said. 246 00:10:16,284 --> 00:10:17,784 This is about meeting our neighbors. 247 00:10:17,808 --> 00:10:19,988 And I've already met some really great ones. 248 00:10:20,008 --> 00:10:20,818 Who? 249 00:10:20,837 --> 00:10:23,327 Well, Craig, Dante, Lil' Hatchet. 250 00:10:23,823 --> 00:10:25,443 "Lil' Hatchet"? 251 00:10:25,930 --> 00:10:27,050 I know. 252 00:10:27,070 --> 00:10:31,380 The name is kind of scary, but trust me, she's really nice. 253 00:10:34,321 --> 00:10:36,461 In the time you've been nursing that drink, 254 00:10:36,487 --> 00:10:38,697 I could've gotten five phone numbers. 255 00:10:38,719 --> 00:10:39,989 With your old ass, 256 00:10:40,010 --> 00:10:41,860 one of 'em better be Life Alert. 257 00:10:43,078 --> 00:10:44,938 You see what's happening here, right? 258 00:10:44,959 --> 00:10:47,219 Our community is being chipped away. 259 00:10:47,238 --> 00:10:48,078 Oh, boy. 260 00:10:48,103 --> 00:10:48,993 No, no, no, no. 261 00:10:49,018 --> 00:10:50,308 Now, come on now. 262 00:10:50,334 --> 00:10:52,054 Marvin's Barbecue is now 263 00:10:52,095 --> 00:10:53,175 a coffee shop. 264 00:10:53,502 --> 00:10:54,832 Norm's Hardware 265 00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:56,440 - is a juice bar. - All right. 266 00:10:56,465 --> 00:11:00,035 And Sondra's Beauty Parlor is a marijuana dispensary. 267 00:11:00,084 --> 00:11:01,694 She always sold weed. 268 00:11:01,721 --> 00:11:03,271 It's just legal now. 269 00:11:03,581 --> 00:11:05,021 That is true. 270 00:11:05,055 --> 00:11:06,385 (CHUCKLES) 271 00:11:06,634 --> 00:11:08,854 Well, no matter how much this neighborhood changes, 272 00:11:08,882 --> 00:11:09,882 my auto shop 273 00:11:09,909 --> 00:11:11,989 and this fine drinking establishment 274 00:11:12,010 --> 00:11:13,400 will always be here. 275 00:11:13,417 --> 00:11:14,537 - Yeah. - Yeah. 276 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:16,209 - Yeah, yeah. - To you and me, man. 277 00:11:16,283 --> 00:11:18,253 The last of the Mohicans. 278 00:11:18,276 --> 00:11:20,976 (CHUCKLES) 279 00:11:23,706 --> 00:11:25,556 Why you not raising your beer? 280 00:11:26,113 --> 00:11:28,253 Look, Calvin, I ain't gonna lie to you. 281 00:11:28,281 --> 00:11:29,891 I've been getting a lot of calls 282 00:11:29,919 --> 00:11:31,719 from people wanting to buy this place. 283 00:11:31,741 --> 00:11:32,881 What? 284 00:11:32,911 --> 00:11:34,091 How much? 285 00:11:34,122 --> 00:11:35,962 Enough to retire to Méjico. 286 00:11:35,991 --> 00:11:38,261 Which is Spanish for "I'm rich there!" 287 00:11:40,063 --> 00:11:41,723 Come on, man. 288 00:11:41,747 --> 00:11:44,077 Think about all the memories we had. 289 00:11:44,567 --> 00:11:45,727 You know, 290 00:11:45,746 --> 00:11:46,816 it was in that booth right there 291 00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:48,746 - that you met your wife. - (CHUCKLES) Yeah. 292 00:11:48,772 --> 00:11:51,822 And then that booth right there where you proposed to her. 293 00:11:51,917 --> 00:11:53,187 And then that booth 294 00:11:53,208 --> 00:11:54,588 where she caught you cheating. 295 00:11:54,615 --> 00:11:56,025 Yeah. 296 00:11:56,053 --> 00:11:57,663 Those were good times. 297 00:11:57,922 --> 00:11:59,382 Exactly. 298 00:11:59,413 --> 00:12:01,203 That's why you can't sell this place. 299 00:12:01,233 --> 00:12:03,043 (SIGHS) What can I say? 300 00:12:03,071 --> 00:12:04,631 I love the neighborhood. 301 00:12:04,662 --> 00:12:07,282 Pero I love Cancún más. 302 00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:09,177 Fine. 303 00:12:09,199 --> 00:12:10,469 You want to go to the party? 304 00:12:10,490 --> 00:12:12,490 Go ahead. Be a sellout. 305 00:12:12,514 --> 00:12:15,134 Hey, hey, hold up, hold up! You forgot to pay your tab. 306 00:12:15,158 --> 00:12:16,398 No, I didn't. 307 00:12:16,420 --> 00:12:18,490 I'm about to report that card stolen. 308 00:12:20,869 --> 00:12:23,359 ♪ Go to work, that girl go to work, work ♪ 309 00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:26,106 ♪ Girl, go to work, that girl go to work, hey, hey... ♪ 310 00:12:26,127 --> 00:12:27,817 - Hey. - Hey. 311 00:12:27,836 --> 00:12:29,036 We finally meet. 312 00:12:29,065 --> 00:12:30,395 - I've been trying totalk to you, - (CHUCKLES) 313 00:12:30,423 --> 00:12:32,183 but you've been busy with your girlfriend over there. 314 00:12:32,237 --> 00:12:34,167 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 315 00:12:40,328 --> 00:12:42,678 You know, she used to change my diaper. 316 00:12:42,699 --> 00:12:44,339 Now she wants me to get in hers. 317 00:12:44,365 --> 00:12:45,585 (LAUGHS) 318 00:12:45,858 --> 00:12:47,058 I'm Lisa. 319 00:12:47,082 --> 00:12:48,472 Hey, Lisa. I'm Malcolm. 320 00:12:48,502 --> 00:12:50,182 Oh, so this is your party. 321 00:12:50,212 --> 00:12:51,502 Chris forwarded me the invite. 322 00:12:51,541 --> 00:12:53,121 Your house is so nice. 323 00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:55,253 - You know, actually, I-I... - It's so cool to meet a guy 324 00:12:55,281 --> 00:12:57,361 who doesn't live with his parents for once. 325 00:12:57,386 --> 00:12:59,156 (CHUCKLES) I know, right? 326 00:12:59,178 --> 00:13:00,458 (CHUCKLES) 327 00:13:00,483 --> 00:13:02,163 Hey, Malcolm, this is amazing. 328 00:13:02,189 --> 00:13:04,519 Someone turned my room into a VIP lounge. 329 00:13:04,539 --> 00:13:05,919 I couldn't even get in. 330 00:13:05,939 --> 00:13:06,969 (CHUCKLES) 331 00:13:06,987 --> 00:13:08,377 Does he live here, too? 332 00:13:08,404 --> 00:13:10,654 Yes. Every crew's got to have a white guy 333 00:13:10,681 --> 00:13:12,391 that they can do this to. 334 00:13:12,763 --> 00:13:14,443 Hey, yo, Dave! 335 00:13:18,657 --> 00:13:21,427 Listen up, party people! 336 00:13:21,695 --> 00:13:23,505 Big Mike's Tattoo Parlor is open for business 337 00:13:23,533 --> 00:13:26,423 in the guest bathroom. He specializes in cover-ups 338 00:13:26,454 --> 00:13:28,094 for all of your failed relationships. 339 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:30,360 - (CHUCKLES) - (GIGGLING) 340 00:13:30,378 --> 00:13:32,168 Ooh, hey, can I say something? 341 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:34,976 Uh, he-hey, everyone. 342 00:13:35,296 --> 00:13:38,926 I just want to thank you all for coming out tonight and... 343 00:13:39,181 --> 00:13:41,311 w-welcoming us to the neighborhood. 344 00:13:41,461 --> 00:13:44,411 (WHOOPS) Dave from the "D"! 345 00:13:44,740 --> 00:13:46,600 Now let's keep this party going. 346 00:13:46,619 --> 00:13:49,619 What time is it? CP time! 347 00:13:54,418 --> 00:13:57,108 (SPEAKING QUIETLY) 348 00:14:00,645 --> 00:14:02,395 No. 349 00:14:05,275 --> 00:14:07,055 I'm-I'm so sorry about that. 350 00:14:07,082 --> 00:14:10,482 Uh, I was led to believe that that meant something else. 351 00:14:14,192 --> 00:14:15,852 Hey, big man. 352 00:14:16,365 --> 00:14:17,535 Who are you? 353 00:14:17,556 --> 00:14:18,626 The valet. 354 00:14:18,648 --> 00:14:20,768 It's 20 bucks up front. 355 00:14:20,795 --> 00:14:22,075 How long you gonna be? 356 00:14:23,109 --> 00:14:24,849 The rest of my damn life. 357 00:14:24,869 --> 00:14:27,449 Man, get out of my driveway. 358 00:14:28,246 --> 00:14:29,776 Oh, hey! Calvin! 359 00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:33,266 Guess the balloons worked! 360 00:14:35,906 --> 00:14:39,176 ♪ ♪ 361 00:14:40,821 --> 00:14:43,331 I'm just gonna take these from you. 362 00:14:47,503 --> 00:14:49,043 Oh, no, no, no. Please keep making out. 363 00:14:49,070 --> 00:14:50,760 You look very much in love. 364 00:14:51,035 --> 00:14:54,205 Ooh, yeah. Hey, hey! 365 00:14:54,229 --> 00:14:56,299 Hey, girl, what you in here doing cleaning up? 366 00:14:56,323 --> 00:14:57,513 This party ain't over. 367 00:14:57,538 --> 00:14:58,868 - No, it needs to be over now. - Mm. 368 00:14:58,888 --> 00:15:01,258 I just saw somebody wearing my wedding dress. 369 00:15:01,841 --> 00:15:03,721 Well, you and Dave seem happy. 370 00:15:03,749 --> 00:15:05,159 You ain't gonna need it anymore. 371 00:15:05,178 --> 00:15:06,928 (SIGHS) 372 00:15:07,602 --> 00:15:09,162 How do I shut this down? 373 00:15:09,193 --> 00:15:11,993 Do I hide the booze and tell everyone we ran out? 374 00:15:12,106 --> 00:15:14,896 You know that burned-down house on the corner of 22nd? 375 00:15:14,925 --> 00:15:16,235 Yeah, they hid the booze, too. 376 00:15:16,264 --> 00:15:19,114 (SIGHS) What can I do? 377 00:15:19,145 --> 00:15:21,075 - Please, Tina, I'm desperate. - (SIGHS) 378 00:15:21,102 --> 00:15:24,462 Well, I do know one person that will shut this party down. 379 00:15:24,495 --> 00:15:25,455 Calvin? 380 00:15:25,479 --> 00:15:28,659 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, I'd hate to do that to Dave. 381 00:15:33,770 --> 00:15:35,940 Oh, hey, Lil' Hatchet! 382 00:15:40,110 --> 00:15:42,390 - Do it. Do it now. - I'm doing it. 383 00:15:42,411 --> 00:15:44,061 I'm doing it. 384 00:15:44,090 --> 00:15:46,180 ♪ ♪ 385 00:15:46,198 --> 00:15:47,638 All right! 386 00:15:47,662 --> 00:15:49,192 Party's over, people! 387 00:15:49,224 --> 00:15:51,584 If your last name not Butler or Johnson, 388 00:15:51,607 --> 00:15:53,207 you got to go home! 389 00:15:53,449 --> 00:15:55,919 ♪ Let me see you twerk... ♪ 390 00:15:55,944 --> 00:15:58,484 I'm always surprised on how many people live around here 391 00:15:58,510 --> 00:16:00,510 last name Butler or Johnson. 392 00:16:00,813 --> 00:16:02,353 Marty, turn it off. 393 00:16:02,380 --> 00:16:04,300 Everybody, come on, let's go! 394 00:16:04,316 --> 00:16:05,836 - Let's go! It's time to go now. - (MUSIC STOPS) 395 00:16:05,861 --> 00:16:07,231 I'm not playing around here. 396 00:16:07,261 --> 00:16:08,621 Joe, what are you doing here? 397 00:16:08,653 --> 00:16:10,723 You know you on probation. 398 00:16:11,750 --> 00:16:13,950 And, Frank, you a pastor. Give me that. 399 00:16:14,750 --> 00:16:16,810 And who watching your kids, Dana? 400 00:16:16,835 --> 00:16:18,525 Huh? You just out here to party, like... 401 00:16:18,548 --> 00:16:19,788 Oh, there they are right there. 402 00:16:19,807 --> 00:16:21,787 Hey. Hey, little man! 403 00:16:22,391 --> 00:16:24,411 Oh, my God, it's working. 404 00:16:24,443 --> 00:16:27,823 Now if only he could clear out the garage like this. 405 00:16:29,469 --> 00:16:30,739 Can I walk you home? 406 00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:31,660 I'd like that. 407 00:16:31,683 --> 00:16:33,183 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 408 00:16:33,287 --> 00:16:34,317 KIM: Hey. 409 00:16:34,344 --> 00:16:35,544 Where you going with my man? 410 00:16:35,567 --> 00:16:36,627 Yep. Better go. 411 00:16:36,852 --> 00:16:38,542 Whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa! 412 00:16:38,583 --> 00:16:39,713 Where's everybody going? 413 00:16:39,741 --> 00:16:41,481 I finally got into the VIP room. 414 00:16:42,294 --> 00:16:43,554 Party's over, Dave. 415 00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:44,705 I'm shutting you down. 416 00:16:44,726 --> 00:16:45,996 What? 417 00:16:46,196 --> 00:16:47,896 What do you mean you're shutting me down? 418 00:16:48,324 --> 00:16:51,444 Who are you to come into our home and shut down our party? 419 00:16:51,710 --> 00:16:52,980 Ask your wife. 420 00:16:53,001 --> 00:16:54,871 She begged me to do it. 421 00:16:55,128 --> 00:16:57,008 What? Gemma, 422 00:16:57,027 --> 00:16:58,357 - how could you... - Because there's a cockfight 423 00:16:58,384 --> 00:17:00,164 going on in our backyard. 424 00:17:01,141 --> 00:17:02,971 Oh. Oh, Tito and them here? 425 00:17:03,813 --> 00:17:05,623 Shoot, I'm doing you a favor. 426 00:17:05,655 --> 00:17:08,125 Okay, you know what, don't act like some kind of hero. 427 00:17:08,153 --> 00:17:09,953 You know you're enjoying this. The only reason you want 428 00:17:09,979 --> 00:17:12,449 this party to be over is because you don't like me. 429 00:17:12,533 --> 00:17:14,903 Who says you can't do things for two reasons? 430 00:17:15,517 --> 00:17:17,387 What is your problem, Calvin? 431 00:17:17,538 --> 00:17:19,738 Why don't you like me? Everyone else here does. 432 00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:21,800 - (SCOFFS) Says you. - Okay, fine. 433 00:17:21,823 --> 00:17:24,203 You know what, let's vote. Show of hands, who here likes me? 434 00:17:24,311 --> 00:17:27,251 Oh... You just gave them free liquor and chicken. 435 00:17:27,283 --> 00:17:28,323 Of course they like you. 436 00:17:28,504 --> 00:17:29,934 Come on. Everybody, 437 00:17:29,964 --> 00:17:31,954 let's wrap this pilgrim party up. Let's go now. 438 00:17:31,979 --> 00:17:34,249 Okay, no, no, no. We're not, we're not wrapping anything up. 439 00:17:34,275 --> 00:17:36,735 You and I are gonna settle this right now, man-to-man. 440 00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:38,976 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 441 00:17:39,002 --> 00:17:41,692 Oh. Okay, big man. 442 00:17:41,718 --> 00:17:43,158 What you got to say? 443 00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,420 Calvin, all I've done since I've moved in here 444 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:47,130 was try to be a good neighbor. 445 00:17:47,155 --> 00:17:48,765 I say hi, I invite you to things, 446 00:17:48,791 --> 00:17:50,971 and all you do is reject me. 447 00:17:50,996 --> 00:17:52,496 How many times I got to tell you? 448 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,890 I'm not doing an escape room with you. 449 00:17:56,625 --> 00:17:59,345 I'm just saying, you're missing out on a lot of fun. 450 00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:03,447 I don't want to be a part of your white folk nonsense. 451 00:18:03,784 --> 00:18:05,394 There it is. The truth comes out. 452 00:18:05,423 --> 00:18:06,913 We're the first white people to move here, 453 00:18:06,944 --> 00:18:08,364 and suddenly, we're the problem. 454 00:18:08,393 --> 00:18:10,143 You know what, man? I don't think so. 455 00:18:10,167 --> 00:18:12,067 Maybe the problem's you because you're a jerk. 456 00:18:12,090 --> 00:18:13,750 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 457 00:18:14,381 --> 00:18:17,811 Really? Really? We oohing at "jerk" now? 458 00:18:18,185 --> 00:18:20,195 Come on, y'all, we more hood than that. 459 00:18:20,628 --> 00:18:22,198 And for your information, 460 00:18:22,219 --> 00:18:24,229 you're not the first white people to live here. 461 00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:27,371 Back in the day, this whole neighborhood was white. 462 00:18:27,651 --> 00:18:29,781 But then my grandparents moved in, 463 00:18:29,810 --> 00:18:33,450 and all they heard was, "There goes the neighborhood." 464 00:18:33,951 --> 00:18:35,141 And soon, 465 00:18:35,170 --> 00:18:37,280 all of the white people moved away, 466 00:18:37,301 --> 00:18:39,871 because they didn't want to live next to black people. 467 00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:41,821 Okay, but that's not me. 468 00:18:41,850 --> 00:18:43,540 I want to live here. 469 00:18:43,558 --> 00:18:45,868 Sure, now you do. 470 00:18:46,243 --> 00:18:49,313 See, but when y'all left, the community suffered, 471 00:18:49,576 --> 00:18:52,416 and-and we, we worked hard to restore it. 472 00:18:52,445 --> 00:18:53,995 And now, you want to come back 473 00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:55,742 into our neighborhood and reclaim it as your own. 474 00:18:55,772 --> 00:18:58,792 Okay, I am not-I am not trying to reclaim anything. 475 00:18:59,603 --> 00:19:02,613 And I'm sorry that your family had to go through that. 476 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:07,110 It is wrong to make anyone feel unwelcome 477 00:19:07,135 --> 00:19:09,065 in their own neighborhood. 478 00:19:09,134 --> 00:19:11,264 But isn't that kind of what you're doing to me? 479 00:19:13,166 --> 00:19:15,316 (AIR HORN SOUND EFFECT) 480 00:19:15,915 --> 00:19:17,235 Oops. Uh, that's my bad. 481 00:19:17,260 --> 00:19:18,990 My finger slipped. (CHUCKLES) 482 00:19:19,012 --> 00:19:20,692 All right, that's it. 483 00:19:20,718 --> 00:19:22,998 Everybody, out. 484 00:19:23,624 --> 00:19:26,244 Oh, is this where the party's at? 485 00:19:26,267 --> 00:19:27,527 I saw the balloons. 486 00:19:27,548 --> 00:19:30,668 Ooh, crudité. Mm. 487 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:36,560 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.addic7ed.com - 488 00:19:37,822 --> 00:19:40,362 Oh, hey, Gemma, good news. 489 00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:42,690 I found your veil. 490 00:19:47,184 --> 00:19:48,574 What are you doing here? 491 00:19:48,599 --> 00:19:50,069 Oh, nothing. 492 00:19:50,368 --> 00:19:52,878 Look, uh, just thought about what you said earlier, 493 00:19:52,898 --> 00:19:55,888 and, uh, brought you this. 494 00:19:59,987 --> 00:20:01,747 Trash bags? 495 00:20:01,772 --> 00:20:05,062 I mean, big party, you know, big mess. 496 00:20:07,234 --> 00:20:09,664 It was kind of a big party, wasn't it? 497 00:20:10,783 --> 00:20:13,243 I mean, I wouldn't call you the Party King of Pasadena, 498 00:20:13,275 --> 00:20:15,645 but it was a'ight. 499 00:20:16,153 --> 00:20:17,643 Well, thank you. 500 00:20:17,672 --> 00:20:19,672 You're welcome. 501 00:20:20,581 --> 00:20:21,951 You hear what I said? 502 00:20:22,754 --> 00:20:24,274 I said you're welcome. 503 00:20:24,923 --> 00:20:26,453 Yeah, I heard you. 504 00:20:26,924 --> 00:20:28,354 I don't think you did. 505 00:20:28,382 --> 00:20:30,732 You are welcome. 506 00:20:31,957 --> 00:20:34,427 O-kay. 507 00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:39,913 Ah, hell, I tried. (MUMBLES) 508 00:20:40,609 --> 00:20:42,769 Why do you keep saying "You're welcome..." 509 00:20:43,891 --> 00:20:45,161 I get it. 510 00:20:45,203 --> 00:20:48,273 I'm welcome, like, like, in the neighborhood. 511 00:20:48,299 --> 00:20:50,399 Too late! I changed my mind.