1 00:00:03,198 --> 00:00:06,988 Son, you better not be eating my Fruity Puffs. 2 00:00:07,028 --> 00:00:08,988 What Fruity Puffs? 3 00:00:09,030 --> 00:00:11,300 Mom doesn'’t let you have those sugar cereals anymore. 4 00:00:11,336 --> 00:00:12,986 "Let me have"? 5 00:00:13,034 --> 00:00:15,334 Nobody lets me have anything. 6 00:00:15,384 --> 00:00:17,344 I'’m not scared of your mama. 7 00:00:17,386 --> 00:00:19,086 Okay. Well, I didn'’t see any Fruity Puffs 8 00:00:19,127 --> 00:00:21,307 in that cabinet.I know, '’cause I hid '’em here. 9 00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:26,830 Okay, I see. S-So Mom'’s going out of town for the weekend, 10 00:00:26,873 --> 00:00:28,833 you just gonna do whatever you want to, huh? 11 00:00:28,875 --> 00:00:30,655 You know, son, you don'’t understand 12 00:00:30,703 --> 00:00:32,613 what it'’s like to be the man of the house. 13 00:00:32,662 --> 00:00:33,962 You'’re always worried 14 00:00:34,011 --> 00:00:35,091 about other people'’s needs. 15 00:00:35,143 --> 00:00:36,963 It'’s never really about you. 16 00:00:37,014 --> 00:00:39,794 But with your mother going to Vegas overnight, 17 00:00:39,843 --> 00:00:44,063 the rest of this weekend is about me and only me. 18 00:00:44,108 --> 00:00:46,898 Well, excuse me, Pop, 19 00:00:46,937 --> 00:00:49,467 but I will still be here.Yeah. 20 00:00:49,505 --> 00:00:51,505 But I don'’t care about your needs. 21 00:00:52,595 --> 00:00:54,375 Calvin! Mm. 22 00:00:54,423 --> 00:00:56,383 Yeah, babe. 23 00:00:56,425 --> 00:00:57,865 Hey, baby. Can you do me a favor 24 00:00:57,904 --> 00:00:59,814 and take these to the car?Damn, Tina. 25 00:00:59,863 --> 00:01:01,163 You'’re only going away for one night. 26 00:01:01,212 --> 00:01:02,692 Why do you need three bags? 27 00:01:02,735 --> 00:01:05,525 Well, this one is for my clothes, 28 00:01:05,564 --> 00:01:07,344 this one is for hair and makeup, 29 00:01:07,392 --> 00:01:08,472 and this one is empty. 30 00:01:08,524 --> 00:01:09,614 Mama'’s going shopping. 31 00:01:11,744 --> 00:01:14,574 And what else do you and Gemma have planned for Vegas? 32 00:01:14,617 --> 00:01:17,747 Baby, how about you don'’t ask me about my plans, 33 00:01:17,794 --> 00:01:20,104 and I won'’t ask you about that box of Fruity Puffs 34 00:01:20,144 --> 00:01:22,494 that you got hiding behind my cookbooks. 35 00:01:23,582 --> 00:01:24,712 Have a great trip.Okay. 36 00:01:26,933 --> 00:01:28,583 I'’m so excited! 37 00:01:28,631 --> 00:01:30,631 Tina and I are gonna have so much fun. 38 00:01:30,676 --> 00:01:32,246 I know, your first girls'’ trip. 39 00:01:32,287 --> 00:01:34,337 Man, I wish I could go. 40 00:01:34,376 --> 00:01:36,156 Okay, but then it wouldn'’t be 41 00:01:36,204 --> 00:01:38,554 much of a girls'’trip, would it, sweetie? 42 00:01:38,597 --> 00:01:41,687 I know, but I really feel like I could add to the experience. 43 00:01:41,731 --> 00:01:43,341 Like you two are Thelma and Louise 44 00:01:43,385 --> 00:01:44,905 and I'’m Brad Pitt. 45 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:48,180 Hey, guys.Hey. 46 00:01:48,216 --> 00:01:49,256 So, what do you say, Gemma? 47 00:01:49,304 --> 00:01:50,954 You ready to have some fun? 48 00:01:51,001 --> 00:01:52,211 You know it, girl!Yeah! 49 00:01:52,263 --> 00:01:54,303 What do you say, Calvin? 50 00:01:54,352 --> 00:01:56,522 You ready to have some fun, too? 51 00:01:56,572 --> 00:01:58,702 I got to load the bags, Dave. 52 00:02:01,359 --> 00:02:03,409 This one feels empty. 53 00:02:03,448 --> 00:02:05,238 Maybe I should climb in and stow away. 54 00:02:05,276 --> 00:02:07,886 Hey, that'’s a good idea. '’Cause you know what they say: 55 00:02:07,931 --> 00:02:10,011 what goes to Vegas stays in Vegas. 56 00:02:12,109 --> 00:02:13,719 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 57 00:02:13,763 --> 00:02:14,713 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 58 00:02:37,047 --> 00:02:41,227 ♪ Hey, girl... 59 00:02:41,269 --> 00:02:43,669 Aw, that takes me back to my player days right there. 60 00:02:43,706 --> 00:02:46,796 Tina lucky she locked me down. 61 00:02:46,839 --> 00:02:48,449 ♪ Hey, boy... 62 00:02:48,493 --> 00:02:50,583 It'’s good to be the king. 63 00:02:50,626 --> 00:02:53,106 I thought all kings wore robes. 64 00:02:53,150 --> 00:02:54,810 Well, they do. 65 00:02:54,847 --> 00:02:57,417 But I needed to let the royal jewels breathe. 66 00:02:57,459 --> 00:02:59,509 Hey, man. 67 00:02:59,548 --> 00:03:01,508 So, this is how you'’re fulfilling your needs 68 00:03:01,550 --> 00:03:03,250 for the weekend, huh? 69 00:03:03,291 --> 00:03:05,941 Sitting in your underwear, listening to oldies, 70 00:03:05,989 --> 00:03:07,729 and giving yourself diabetes? 71 00:03:07,773 --> 00:03:10,603 It'’s pretty cool, right? 72 00:03:10,646 --> 00:03:12,516 You know what would be pretty cool, Pop, 73 00:03:12,561 --> 00:03:14,471 is if you ordered the pay-per-view fight for tonight. 74 00:03:14,519 --> 00:03:17,049 Posley versus Camargo. Supposed to be a good one. 75 00:03:17,087 --> 00:03:19,747 But then I would be fulfilling your needs as well as mine. 76 00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:21,877 Aw, what the hell. 77 00:03:21,918 --> 00:03:23,178 I'’m a benevolent king. 78 00:03:23,224 --> 00:03:26,054 Okay, well, I'’ll let Marty know. 79 00:03:26,096 --> 00:03:27,796 Good. We'’ll make it a guys'’ night. 80 00:03:27,837 --> 00:03:28,967 All right. Well, I'’ll invite Dave. 81 00:03:29,012 --> 00:03:31,532 Now, hold on a second, now. 82 00:03:31,580 --> 00:03:32,720 What? How come? 83 00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:35,535 '’Cause Dave is not the kind of guy 84 00:03:35,584 --> 00:03:37,544 you invite over for guys'’ night. 85 00:03:37,586 --> 00:03:39,766 I mean, now, 86 00:03:39,805 --> 00:03:42,155 we were having a men'’s brunch with a wine tasting? 87 00:03:42,199 --> 00:03:43,809 All right, look, Pop, I know 88 00:03:43,853 --> 00:03:46,023 Dave is not your typical kind of dude, 89 00:03:46,072 --> 00:03:47,892 but if you ask me, Dave is a man. 90 00:03:47,944 --> 00:03:49,294 I know. 91 00:03:49,337 --> 00:03:51,777 That'’s why I don't ask you. 92 00:03:51,817 --> 00:03:53,387 Look, come on, Pop. 93 00:03:53,428 --> 00:03:56,218 He is a good husband and father who takes care of his family. 94 00:03:56,257 --> 00:03:58,307 And he is not embarrassed to be himself. 95 00:03:58,346 --> 00:04:00,216 There is no shame in Dave'’s game. 96 00:04:00,261 --> 00:04:01,731 I know. 97 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:04,694 Which is weird, because there really should be. 98 00:04:04,743 --> 00:04:07,703 But that'’s what I'm saying, man. Dave knows who he is, 99 00:04:07,746 --> 00:04:09,536 and he owns it no matter what anyone thinks. 100 00:04:09,574 --> 00:04:11,704 Isn'’t that what makes a man real to you? 101 00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:14,840 Fine. Go ahead. Invite him. 102 00:04:14,884 --> 00:04:17,144 Probably doesn'’t even like boxing. 103 00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:19,370 "Calvin, it'’s so barbaric. 104 00:04:19,410 --> 00:04:21,330 "Why can'’t they just settle their differences 105 00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:23,329 with a rousing game of Parcheesi?" 106 00:04:25,590 --> 00:04:28,990 Dave says, "Hell yes," and he is bringing snacks. 107 00:04:29,028 --> 00:04:30,688 Okay.Yeah. 108 00:04:30,726 --> 00:04:33,776 Well, maybe it won'’t be so bad. 109 00:04:33,816 --> 00:04:35,466 He wants to know what you like on your veggie plate. 110 00:04:38,777 --> 00:04:42,387 Okay, we have a gondola ride at the Venetian at 6:00, 111 00:04:42,433 --> 00:04:45,473 the dancing fountains at the Bellagio at 7:30, and-- 112 00:04:45,523 --> 00:04:47,303 drumroll, please-- 113 00:04:47,351 --> 00:04:49,571 Donny and Marie tickets at 9:00! 114 00:04:50,789 --> 00:04:52,489 Vegas, baby! 115 00:04:52,530 --> 00:04:54,490 ♪ Girls'’ trip. ♪ 116 00:04:54,532 --> 00:04:56,492 Gemma, the only girl who'’s trippin' is you. 117 00:04:57,970 --> 00:04:59,670 Yeah, we only came here 118 00:04:59,711 --> 00:05:01,581 because you said that you needed to blow off some steam. 119 00:05:01,626 --> 00:05:03,716 We'’re not doing any of that corny stuff. 120 00:05:03,759 --> 00:05:05,899 But I made a whole itinerary. Look. 121 00:05:05,935 --> 00:05:07,585 It'’s got little boxes we can check off. 122 00:05:07,632 --> 00:05:10,112 Aw. Well, that'’s nice. 123 00:05:10,156 --> 00:05:12,026 But my itinerary says that it'’s time 124 00:05:12,071 --> 00:05:13,811 to throw out your itinerary. 125 00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,076 What? 126 00:05:15,118 --> 00:05:17,598 Check. 127 00:05:17,642 --> 00:05:19,812 I just thought the more structure we had, 128 00:05:19,862 --> 00:05:21,552 the more we could pack into our night. 129 00:05:21,603 --> 00:05:26,043 When I rage, I try to rage efficiently. 130 00:05:26,085 --> 00:05:28,915 Gemma, a girls'’ night in Vegas is like floating down a river. 131 00:05:28,958 --> 00:05:30,918 You know? You got to go with the flow 132 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,530 and see where it takes you. 133 00:05:33,571 --> 00:05:35,791 And why is your plan better than mine? 134 00:05:35,834 --> 00:05:37,054 Because it'’s Vegas, girl. 135 00:05:37,096 --> 00:05:38,446 Always bet on black. 136 00:05:39,534 --> 00:05:41,794 Hey. Check it out, ladies. 137 00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:43,500 The hottest show in town. 138 00:05:43,538 --> 00:05:46,278 See your wildest fantasies onstage tonight. 139 00:05:49,718 --> 00:05:50,978 Magic Mike Live? 140 00:05:51,023 --> 00:05:54,243 What? Let me see that. 141 00:05:54,287 --> 00:05:55,857 It'’s just a bunch of male strippers. 142 00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:57,818 Exactly. You see? 143 00:05:57,856 --> 00:06:01,116 We go with the flow, and plans will fall right in our laps. 144 00:06:01,164 --> 00:06:02,384 And tonight some men will, too. 145 00:06:06,038 --> 00:06:08,038 Thanks again for inviting me. Grover'’s at a sleepover. 146 00:06:08,084 --> 00:06:09,954 Otherwise I wouldn'’t have been able to come. 147 00:06:09,999 --> 00:06:11,349 How convenient. 148 00:06:11,392 --> 00:06:14,742 You gonna get in on some of this jicama, Calvin? 149 00:06:16,092 --> 00:06:18,002 It'’s in season. 150 00:06:18,050 --> 00:06:19,530 Well, fortunately, 151 00:06:19,574 --> 00:06:21,964 so is pizza. 152 00:06:22,011 --> 00:06:24,661 Man, this is great. Nothing like a bunch of guys 153 00:06:24,709 --> 00:06:27,109 getting together to watch a big fight. 154 00:06:27,146 --> 00:06:28,716 Whoa. 155 00:06:28,757 --> 00:06:30,587 I almost just double dipped. 156 00:06:30,628 --> 00:06:31,328 So... 157 00:06:34,632 --> 00:06:37,062 So, uh, Dave, who do you think'’s gonna win the fight? 158 00:06:37,113 --> 00:06:38,373 Well, I don'’t know much about these two fighters. 159 00:06:40,203 --> 00:06:43,373 But Camargo is undefeated against southpaws, 160 00:06:43,424 --> 00:06:44,904 and nobody cuts the ring off better than he does. 161 00:06:46,775 --> 00:06:48,685 And then, Posley 162 00:06:48,733 --> 00:06:50,213 does have a three-inch reach advantage 163 00:06:50,256 --> 00:06:51,906 and a pretty solid chin. 164 00:06:57,307 --> 00:07:00,357 But I'’m rooting for Posley '’cause I like his purple shorts. 165 00:07:04,532 --> 00:07:06,702 Hey, guys. Big fight night. 166 00:07:06,751 --> 00:07:09,101 Oh, I see the jicama'’s in season. 167 00:07:09,145 --> 00:07:11,405 Yeah. 168 00:07:12,583 --> 00:07:15,413 Whoa. Wh-What'’s wrong with the TV? 169 00:07:15,456 --> 00:07:17,106 Why'’s it all pixelated like that? 170 00:07:17,153 --> 00:07:18,933 I don'’t know. I paid for the fight. 171 00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:21,151 Well, maybe something'’s blocking the satellite dish. 172 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,340 Well, Marty, do something. You work on satellites. 173 00:07:23,376 --> 00:07:25,906 Yeah, in space. 174 00:07:27,511 --> 00:07:30,291 Then it should be easier down here. 175 00:07:30,340 --> 00:07:32,130 Okay. 176 00:07:32,168 --> 00:07:34,298 Let'’s just go outside and take a look. 177 00:07:36,607 --> 00:07:38,737 I told you we shouldn'’t have invited Dave. 178 00:07:38,783 --> 00:07:40,083 Oh, he had nothing to do with this. 179 00:07:40,132 --> 00:07:41,302 I didn'’t say he did. 180 00:07:44,528 --> 00:07:46,528 Oh, there'’s the problem. 181 00:07:46,574 --> 00:07:48,534 The branch from Dave'’s tree is blocking the signal. 182 00:07:48,576 --> 00:07:51,226 I knew this was Dave'’s fault. 183 00:07:51,274 --> 00:07:52,974 How is this my fault? 184 00:07:53,015 --> 00:07:55,145 Because you don'’t trim your trees enough. 185 00:07:55,191 --> 00:07:58,361 Old raggedy-ass branches just waving around 186 00:07:58,411 --> 00:08:01,151 like one of those things in front of a used car lot. 187 00:08:02,590 --> 00:08:05,120 You know, it'’s a California oak. 188 00:08:05,157 --> 00:08:07,287 I can'’t trim it. They're protected by law. 189 00:08:07,333 --> 00:08:09,593 Oh. That must be why 190 00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:11,600 the cop cars cruise by here three times a day. 191 00:08:11,642 --> 00:08:14,032 Yes, hi. It'’s Dave Johnson. 192 00:08:14,079 --> 00:08:15,739 Local homeowner. 193 00:08:15,777 --> 00:08:17,297 Yeah, we have a bit of a tree conun... 194 00:08:20,564 --> 00:08:21,914 Marty, get the ladder. 195 00:08:21,957 --> 00:08:23,877 Whoa, whoa, Pop, Pop, you are not climbing 196 00:08:23,915 --> 00:08:25,875 on some old, rickety roof with a chain saw. 197 00:08:25,917 --> 00:08:27,137 I'’ll be fine. 198 00:08:27,179 --> 00:08:28,269 How do you know that? 199 00:08:28,311 --> 00:08:30,831 '’Cause you're gonna do it. 200 00:08:30,879 --> 00:08:33,629 No, I'’m not. You heard Dave. Trimming an oak is illegal. 201 00:08:33,664 --> 00:08:35,534 I done stayed out of jail this long. 202 00:08:35,579 --> 00:08:37,499 I'’m not going in for assaulting a tree. 203 00:08:37,538 --> 00:08:40,588 Hmm. Okay. Then Marty will do it. 204 00:08:40,628 --> 00:08:43,288 Oh, Dad, uh... 205 00:08:43,326 --> 00:08:46,546 you know I would do anything to prove to you that I am a man, 206 00:08:46,590 --> 00:08:49,950 but I'’m scared of heights, and I just ate a lot of jicama, so... 207 00:08:51,856 --> 00:08:54,076 Fine. Since none of you will do it, 208 00:08:54,119 --> 00:08:55,259 I guess I will. 209 00:08:55,294 --> 00:08:56,424 No, you won'’t. 210 00:08:58,167 --> 00:09:00,737 Give me the chain saw. 211 00:09:00,778 --> 00:09:04,478 Really? Mr. I Like His Purple Shorts? 212 00:09:04,521 --> 00:09:07,041 Yeah, that'’s right. Look, it'’s my tree. 213 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:09,359 My property. My responsibility. 214 00:09:09,395 --> 00:09:12,005 Okay. Go ahead. 215 00:09:12,050 --> 00:09:14,540 Wait, wait. Dave, are you sure you know how to use that thing? 216 00:09:14,575 --> 00:09:16,185 Oh, relax.Whoa, man! 217 00:09:18,448 --> 00:09:20,628 I got this. Now, before I go up there, 218 00:09:20,668 --> 00:09:22,498 I'’m gonna need two things: hold the ladder and... 219 00:09:23,888 --> 00:09:25,108 ...watch out for Five-O. 220 00:09:35,247 --> 00:09:36,427 I don'’t know about this. 221 00:09:36,466 --> 00:09:38,036 You don'’t know about what? 222 00:09:38,076 --> 00:09:39,686 Hot men? 223 00:09:41,427 --> 00:09:44,257 It'’s just, this isn't my kind of thing. 224 00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:45,650 I know Donny and Marie 225 00:09:45,693 --> 00:09:48,863 are a solid five out of five stars on Yelp. 226 00:09:48,913 --> 00:09:52,483 Yeah, but that guy has a solid six out of six abs. 227 00:09:52,525 --> 00:09:55,445 Tina! That is somebody'’s son. 228 00:09:55,485 --> 00:09:57,265 Mm-hmm. And somebody raised him right! 229 00:09:57,313 --> 00:09:59,353 Okay. Okay. 230 00:09:59,402 --> 00:10:01,962 But what would Calvin think if he knew you were here 231 00:10:02,013 --> 00:10:04,493 surrounded by all these hot, shirtless guys? 232 00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:06,457 He doesn'’t care. In our house, 233 00:10:06,496 --> 00:10:08,196 it doesn'’t matter where you get your appetite, 234 00:10:08,237 --> 00:10:09,847 as long as you come home to eat. 235 00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:15,897 Okay, I'’m up. 236 00:10:17,463 --> 00:10:18,633 Looking good, Dave! 237 00:10:18,682 --> 00:10:20,112 He is gonna die. 238 00:10:22,512 --> 00:10:25,342 Come on, man, get to it! Fight starts in five minutes. 239 00:10:25,384 --> 00:10:27,344 Okay, here we go. 240 00:10:27,386 --> 00:10:30,656 Whoa. 241 00:10:32,391 --> 00:10:34,001 It really shakes in your hands! 242 00:10:36,744 --> 00:10:39,444 Maybe I should call 911 now so they'’re already on their way. 243 00:10:41,531 --> 00:10:43,141 I can'’t reach it. 244 00:10:43,185 --> 00:10:44,315 All right, then-then just come back down, man. 245 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:45,500 Don'’t risk it. 246 00:10:45,535 --> 00:10:48,105 Or get up on your tippy-toes! 247 00:10:51,367 --> 00:10:53,677 I'’m so close! 248 00:10:55,763 --> 00:10:57,543 Whoa! 249 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:58,860 Be careful, David! 250 00:10:58,896 --> 00:11:00,726 Yeah, seriously, man! That'’s a new chain saw! 251 00:11:00,768 --> 00:11:02,688 Almost got it. 252 00:11:04,772 --> 00:11:05,902 Oh! 253 00:11:05,947 --> 00:11:08,037 Yes! 254 00:11:08,079 --> 00:11:09,909 Oh!All right! 255 00:11:09,951 --> 00:11:11,771 I told you I could do it! 256 00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:13,782 Hey, y-you know what? You sure did, man. Now, please, 257 00:11:13,824 --> 00:11:15,044 just come on down, all right? 258 00:11:15,086 --> 00:11:17,216 Okay, okay. But seriously, 259 00:11:17,262 --> 00:11:19,172 you should'’ve seen the look on your faces 260 00:11:19,221 --> 00:11:20,961 when you thought I was gonna-- Whoa! Whoa! 261 00:11:21,005 --> 00:11:23,745 Oh, Daddy, no! Ooh! 262 00:11:23,791 --> 00:11:25,741 Oh, Pop! Pop! 263 00:11:25,793 --> 00:11:27,923 Oh, Pop. 264 00:11:38,893 --> 00:11:40,723 Oh, my God, Calvin. If you didn'’t break my fall, 265 00:11:40,764 --> 00:11:44,504 I could be dead right now. 266 00:11:44,550 --> 00:11:47,470 I know. That'’s what I keep thinking, too. 267 00:11:47,510 --> 00:11:50,430 Are you sure you don'’t want to go to the hospital? 268 00:11:50,469 --> 00:11:51,469 Oh, no, I'’m fine. Thank you, though. 269 00:11:53,342 --> 00:11:55,732 You-- oh, you-you mean Calvin. 270 00:11:55,779 --> 00:11:58,699 No, I'’m-I'm all right; it'’s just my back'’s out a little bit. 271 00:11:58,739 --> 00:12:00,349 Help-help me sit down. 272 00:12:00,392 --> 00:12:02,212 All right. Easy.Okay, you know, the craziest part 273 00:12:02,264 --> 00:12:04,264 was how Dave bounced off of you and landed 274 00:12:04,309 --> 00:12:05,789 right back on top of you. 275 00:12:05,833 --> 00:12:07,743 Like, the science of that 276 00:12:07,791 --> 00:12:09,961 is-is... 277 00:12:10,011 --> 00:12:12,181 Maybe that'’s for another time. 278 00:12:12,230 --> 00:12:15,540 All I know is this damn TV better be working. 279 00:12:16,974 --> 00:12:17,934 Pop, Pop.Get the remote, Marty. 280 00:12:17,975 --> 00:12:19,625 Yeah, I got it, I got it. 281 00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:21,232 Hey, it'’s working. 282 00:12:21,283 --> 00:12:23,853 Oh, man, this is killing me. 283 00:12:23,894 --> 00:12:26,284 Gosh, Calvin, you know, I can'’t help 284 00:12:26,331 --> 00:12:28,371 but feel somewhat responsible for all this. 285 00:12:31,815 --> 00:12:33,815 You know what? Let me run next door and get you 286 00:12:33,861 --> 00:12:36,031 some of Gemma'’s prescription muscle relaxants. 287 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:37,830 Why does Gemma have muscle relaxants? 288 00:12:37,865 --> 00:12:39,475 Oh, well, the doctor just gave them to her 289 00:12:39,518 --> 00:12:40,828 for when her menstrual cramps get real bad. 290 00:12:40,868 --> 00:12:44,088 Oh. 291 00:12:44,132 --> 00:12:48,572 I'’m not taking your wife's period pills, Dave. 292 00:12:48,614 --> 00:12:50,834 No, no, no, Calvin, they'’re not her period pills. 293 00:12:50,878 --> 00:12:52,618 They'’re just the pills she takes when she'’s on her period. 294 00:12:54,533 --> 00:12:56,663 MALCOLM: Whoa, whoa, Pop. 295 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:58,369 You just can'’t sit here like this, man. 296 00:12:58,407 --> 00:12:59,797 Yeah, man, you look miserable. 297 00:12:59,843 --> 00:13:00,803 Yeah, you know what? They'’re right. 298 00:13:00,844 --> 00:13:02,194 Luckily, Calvin, 299 00:13:02,237 --> 00:13:04,587 I have another solution. 300 00:13:04,630 --> 00:13:07,770 I give an amazing massage. 301 00:13:07,808 --> 00:13:09,808 Get the pills. Get the damn pills, Dave! 302 00:13:12,638 --> 00:13:15,338 Yeah! Work it, baby. 303 00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,080 Hump that floor! 304 00:13:18,819 --> 00:13:21,129 I think I'’m starting to get it. 305 00:13:21,169 --> 00:13:23,919 All of these men are here for ourpleasure, 306 00:13:23,954 --> 00:13:26,214 asking what we want. 307 00:13:26,261 --> 00:13:28,391 No one ever asks women what they want. 308 00:13:28,437 --> 00:13:31,177 Look at him twirling that T-shirt over his head 309 00:13:31,222 --> 00:13:32,522 like a sexy helicopter. 310 00:13:34,399 --> 00:13:36,319 It'’s almost as if 311 00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:39,058 Magic Mikeis the ultimate expression of feminism. 312 00:13:41,058 --> 00:13:43,408 Oh! Oh-oh-oh! Black Hawk down! 313 00:13:44,801 --> 00:13:47,021 I'’m going-- oh, oh, oh, oh! Wait. 314 00:13:47,064 --> 00:13:48,104 Whoa, whoa, what are you doing? 315 00:13:48,152 --> 00:13:49,802 Come on! We'’re going to the stage. 316 00:13:49,850 --> 00:13:51,640 What-what? Wait, wait, wait! Tina! Tina! 317 00:13:51,677 --> 00:13:53,337 I don'’t think I'm ready for this much feminism. 318 00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:58,120 What'’s about to happen? 319 00:13:58,162 --> 00:14:00,772 Magic, Gemma. Magic. 320 00:14:04,038 --> 00:14:06,998 Wow, round five and Posley'’s still in it.Well, yeah, 321 00:14:07,041 --> 00:14:08,381 but look how much he'’s bleeding. 322 00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:09,863 Ah, get him, Camargo! 323 00:14:11,654 --> 00:14:13,484 Hey, Pop, those pills making you feel any better? 324 00:14:13,525 --> 00:14:15,305 Actually... 325 00:14:17,660 --> 00:14:19,750 ...quite a bit. 326 00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:24,182 But why do these guys keep hitting each other like that? 327 00:14:25,494 --> 00:14:28,274 With all of the violence in the world, 328 00:14:28,323 --> 00:14:30,283 don'’t you think it'’s a better way 329 00:14:30,325 --> 00:14:31,895 they can solve their problems? 330 00:14:34,590 --> 00:14:36,250 Um, like what? 331 00:14:36,287 --> 00:14:39,687 Like a dance-off. 332 00:14:39,725 --> 00:14:41,685 Or a staring contest? 333 00:14:50,171 --> 00:14:52,651 Yeah, let... let-let me see those pills. 334 00:14:52,695 --> 00:14:55,085 Just... 335 00:14:55,132 --> 00:14:59,042 "The side effects may include dizziness, drowsiness, 336 00:14:59,093 --> 00:15:02,313 and emotional sensitivity." 337 00:15:02,357 --> 00:15:06,097 What the world needs is love. 338 00:15:07,884 --> 00:15:10,844 Okay, look-- I-I only gave him two. 339 00:15:10,887 --> 00:15:13,107 Oh, wait. I just gave him two. 340 00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:17,117 Can I give him two more? 341 00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:22,891 Malcolm. Malcolm, where are you, boy? 342 00:15:22,943 --> 00:15:24,293 Yeah-- hey, hey, hey, hey, Pop. 343 00:15:24,335 --> 00:15:25,165 I'’m sitting right next to you, man. 344 00:15:25,206 --> 00:15:28,596 Oh. There you are.Yeah. 345 00:15:28,644 --> 00:15:29,864 Come here, son. 346 00:15:29,906 --> 00:15:32,606 O-Okay. 347 00:15:32,648 --> 00:15:34,128 Malcolm. Yeah? 348 00:15:34,171 --> 00:15:36,251 You'’re my firstborn son. 349 00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:37,654 Yeah. 350 00:15:37,696 --> 00:15:39,696 And I love you, boy.Uh-huh. 351 00:15:41,309 --> 00:15:43,359 Hey, uh, thanks, Pop.Yeah. 352 00:15:43,398 --> 00:15:45,058 Marty? 353 00:15:47,054 --> 00:15:48,354 Yes, Dad? 354 00:15:48,403 --> 00:15:51,533 I was just seeing if you were still here. 355 00:15:55,410 --> 00:15:57,630 O-Okay. Okay. 356 00:15:57,673 --> 00:16:00,673 Okay, guys, I-I'’m starting to get a little worried. 357 00:16:00,719 --> 00:16:02,729 Calvin, you'’ve ingested some pretty serious drugs, 358 00:16:02,765 --> 00:16:05,245 and you'’re experiencing side effects. 359 00:16:08,118 --> 00:16:10,818 Is there anything you need? 360 00:16:12,993 --> 00:16:15,163 Well, you know what? 361 00:16:15,212 --> 00:16:18,172 Now that you mention it, there is. 362 00:16:18,215 --> 00:16:22,005 Ok-Okay, what is it? 363 00:16:22,045 --> 00:16:25,005 Does that offer for a back rub still stand? 364 00:16:36,799 --> 00:16:39,939 You guys heard him! He asked. 365 00:16:49,029 --> 00:16:50,209 Oh! Oh.Yeah. 366 00:16:53,076 --> 00:16:55,076 Hi, I'’m Gemma. 367 00:16:55,122 --> 00:16:58,082 I really appreciate your progressiveness 368 00:16:58,125 --> 00:16:59,125 and your willingness to objectify yourself 369 00:16:59,169 --> 00:17:00,519 for my pleasure. 370 00:17:00,562 --> 00:17:03,822 Gemma, shut up and make some noise! 371 00:17:05,393 --> 00:17:07,693 Now, where are you comfortable with me putting my hands? 372 00:17:07,743 --> 00:17:10,353 That works. 373 00:17:10,398 --> 00:17:12,318 Come on, Gemma, get out of your head. 374 00:17:12,356 --> 00:17:14,406 This is our girls'’ trip. 375 00:17:14,445 --> 00:17:17,145 You'’re right. Like Thelma and Louise. 376 00:17:17,187 --> 00:17:18,887 Yes. There you go.Yeah. 377 00:17:18,928 --> 00:17:20,328 Now, come on, Thelma. Do you trust me? 378 00:17:20,364 --> 00:17:21,884 I do, Louise. 379 00:17:21,931 --> 00:17:23,751 Do you trust in the magic of Vegas? 380 00:17:23,802 --> 00:17:24,932 Yes. 381 00:17:24,977 --> 00:17:26,027 And of our girls'’ trips? 382 00:17:26,066 --> 00:17:29,246 Ooh-- okay. 383 00:17:29,286 --> 00:17:31,116 Then, come on, girl, let'’s ride this thing 384 00:17:31,158 --> 00:17:32,288 over the cliff together! 385 00:17:33,682 --> 00:17:35,462 You sit down. I can do this. 386 00:17:35,510 --> 00:17:37,690 See, I used to do this back in the day. 387 00:17:37,729 --> 00:17:39,469 Hey, hey. 388 00:17:51,003 --> 00:17:54,093 And to think, after this, we can still go to Donny and Marie! 389 00:17:56,531 --> 00:17:58,701 Okay, Calvin, how we doing? 390 00:17:58,750 --> 00:18:00,970 I don'’t know what your hands 391 00:18:01,013 --> 00:18:04,493 are doing back there, Dave, but don'’t stop. 392 00:18:06,628 --> 00:18:08,758 Do you think Pop'’s gonna remember any of this? 393 00:18:08,804 --> 00:18:11,634 No, I don'’t. 394 00:18:11,676 --> 00:18:13,986 Which is why I'’ve been recording. 395 00:18:17,117 --> 00:18:18,597 Okay. 396 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,170 I think we got all the knots out. 397 00:18:21,208 --> 00:18:23,168 Oh, man, fight'’s over. 398 00:18:23,210 --> 00:18:24,610 Yeah, but I think we can all agree 399 00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:26,126 that this was the main event. 400 00:18:29,477 --> 00:18:32,007 How you doing, Calvin? You feeling okay? 401 00:18:32,044 --> 00:18:33,824 Oh, so much better. 402 00:18:33,872 --> 00:18:36,092 You know what? 403 00:18:36,136 --> 00:18:39,486 Dave, I... have to admit, 404 00:18:39,530 --> 00:18:43,020 when Malcolm first suggested inviting you tonight, 405 00:18:43,055 --> 00:18:46,715 I was like "Boo. 406 00:18:46,755 --> 00:18:49,275 Bad idea." 407 00:18:49,323 --> 00:18:53,893 But now I'’m more like, "Yay! 408 00:18:53,936 --> 00:18:55,716 Dave'’s here." 409 00:18:57,679 --> 00:18:59,729 Well, I-I'’m glad you came around. 410 00:18:59,768 --> 00:19:03,378 Now, don'’t tell you I said this. 411 00:19:06,166 --> 00:19:08,426 I don'’t give you enough credit. 412 00:19:08,472 --> 00:19:12,122 I mean, you'’re not as soft as I thought. 413 00:19:12,172 --> 00:19:14,952 Sure, yeah, you smile too much 414 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,960 and you go to Disneyland by yourself... 415 00:19:21,833 --> 00:19:27,443 ...but you, you got up on that roof with a chain saw 416 00:19:27,491 --> 00:19:30,311 and you did something dangerous and stupid. 417 00:19:32,366 --> 00:19:35,366 And to me, that'’s a man. 418 00:19:38,894 --> 00:19:41,154 I appreciate that, Calvin. 419 00:19:41,201 --> 00:19:43,201 Okeydokey. 420 00:19:43,246 --> 00:19:45,116 My eyes are gonna go to sleep now. 421 00:19:52,386 --> 00:19:54,386 Sweet dreams, buddy. 422 00:19:56,825 --> 00:19:59,175 Oh, and I'’m gonna need copies of that 423 00:19:59,219 --> 00:20:01,359 texted and e-mailed to me immediately! 424 00:20:09,925 --> 00:20:11,185 Hey, Dave. 425 00:20:11,231 --> 00:20:13,011 Oh, hey, Calvin. How'’s the back? 426 00:20:13,058 --> 00:20:16,458 Eh, a little sore, but better. 427 00:20:16,497 --> 00:20:18,887 Man, those pills were strong. 428 00:20:18,934 --> 00:20:21,414 I don'’t even remember the fight. 429 00:20:21,458 --> 00:20:24,418 Oh, well, uh... 430 00:20:24,461 --> 00:20:25,501 you enjoyed it. 431 00:20:30,250 --> 00:20:31,520 Oh, hey, honey. How was your trip? 432 00:20:31,555 --> 00:20:33,465 I'’ll tell you all about it inside. 433 00:20:33,514 --> 00:20:34,684 Well, you don'’t want to grab your bag...Nope. 434 00:20:34,732 --> 00:20:36,082 Mama came home hungry. 435 00:20:42,523 --> 00:20:45,913 Oh, no. No, no, no. Tina, I know that look, 436 00:20:45,961 --> 00:20:47,911 but, baby, I hurt my back, okay? 437 00:20:47,963 --> 00:20:50,393 Oh, you poor baby. 438 00:20:50,444 --> 00:20:52,354 It'’s a good thing I only need your front. 439 00:20:55,187 --> 00:20:56,927 All right, all right. 440 00:20:56,972 --> 00:20:59,232 But first, let me take my period pills. 441 00:20:59,279 --> 00:21:00,199 All right. 442 00:21:04,936 --> 00:21:08,986 Captioning sponsored by CBS 443 00:21:09,027 --> 00:21:10,637 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org