1 00:00:05,722 --> 00:00:07,592 Hey, Calvin. 2 00:00:07,637 --> 00:00:09,207 Any news about Malcolm's job interview? 3 00:00:09,247 --> 00:00:11,727 Eh, not yet. Haven't heard anything. 4 00:00:11,771 --> 00:00:13,251 Oh, my God, it is killing me. 5 00:00:13,295 --> 00:00:14,685 I couldn't sleep a wink last night. 6 00:00:14,731 --> 00:00:16,991 I know. I got your texts 7 00:00:17,038 --> 00:00:19,438 at 2:00, 3:00 and 4:00 a.m. 8 00:00:20,867 --> 00:00:22,567 Look, I'm trying not to worry about it too much. 9 00:00:22,608 --> 00:00:24,788 Oh, yeah, totally, duh. 10 00:00:24,828 --> 00:00:27,228 What was I thinking? 11 00:00:27,265 --> 00:00:29,315 But it has got to be killing you. 12 00:00:30,486 --> 00:00:32,226 I mean, it is an epic story to be the father 13 00:00:32,270 --> 00:00:34,540 of a son who almost made it to the majors, 14 00:00:34,577 --> 00:00:38,107 only to suffer a career-ending injury 15 00:00:38,146 --> 00:00:41,106 and then be rudderless for years. 16 00:00:41,149 --> 00:00:42,629 But now he's back. 17 00:00:42,672 --> 00:00:44,412 He's ready to carve out a path, 18 00:00:44,456 --> 00:00:45,636 but who knows doing what? 19 00:00:47,546 --> 00:00:48,936 You know, I never actually thought 20 00:00:48,982 --> 00:00:50,762 I'd hear myself say this, but... 21 00:00:50,810 --> 00:00:52,730 Dave, can we just talk about you? 22 00:00:53,770 --> 00:00:55,910 Oh, y-yeah, totally. Of-of course. 23 00:00:55,946 --> 00:00:57,336 What about me? Well... 24 00:00:57,382 --> 00:00:58,902 I'm just so nervous about Malcolm! 25 00:00:59,950 --> 00:01:01,700 Look. 26 00:01:01,734 --> 00:01:03,434 This is his first interview in a while. 27 00:01:03,475 --> 00:01:04,825 We're not even sure if he's gonna get it. 28 00:01:04,868 --> 00:01:07,348 So, when he gets here, let's just play it cool. 29 00:01:07,392 --> 00:01:08,782 Yeah. All right? 30 00:01:08,828 --> 00:01:11,008 Hey, guys.Did you get it? 31 00:01:11,048 --> 00:01:13,188 Did you get it? Come on, now. Spit it out, boy. 32 00:01:13,224 --> 00:01:14,224 Pop. I got the job. 33 00:01:14,269 --> 00:01:15,669 Yeah! All right.Yes! 34 00:01:15,705 --> 00:01:16,705 Okay.Come on... 35 00:01:16,749 --> 00:01:18,799 Here we go. 36 00:01:21,450 --> 00:01:23,670 Dave, excuse me.Oh. 37 00:01:23,713 --> 00:01:25,453 Gosh. I'm-I'm sorry. 38 00:01:25,497 --> 00:01:28,067 All right.All right. 39 00:01:28,109 --> 00:01:30,029 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 40 00:01:30,067 --> 00:01:31,377 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 41 00:01:38,206 --> 00:01:40,256 Hey, everybody. Listen to Malcolm. 42 00:01:40,295 --> 00:01:42,555 Well, turns out...He got the job! 43 00:01:42,601 --> 00:01:46,161 Oh, my God! He got the job! Oh, baby! 44 00:01:46,214 --> 00:01:49,214 I am so proud of you. I knew you could do it. 45 00:01:49,260 --> 00:01:50,700 Aw, thanks, Ma, I appreciate it. 46 00:01:50,740 --> 00:01:52,400 Yeah, man, congrats. 47 00:01:52,437 --> 00:01:54,437 Now you can pay me back that 50 bucks you owe me. 48 00:01:54,483 --> 00:01:55,613 Man... 49 00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:57,398 But seriously, congrats. 50 00:01:57,442 --> 00:01:58,702 But seriously, 50 bucks. 51 00:01:58,748 --> 00:01:59,968 Get out of here, man. 52 00:02:01,054 --> 00:02:02,704 This is big, Malcolm.Mm-hmm. 53 00:02:02,752 --> 00:02:04,572 I mean, you're putting yourself back out there 54 00:02:04,623 --> 00:02:06,533 and years from now, you're gonna look back on this day 55 00:02:06,582 --> 00:02:08,402 as a turning point in your life.Mm-hmm. 56 00:02:08,453 --> 00:02:10,583 Look, I don't know, Pop, y'all are making too big 57 00:02:10,629 --> 00:02:12,369 a deal out of this, man. 58 00:02:12,414 --> 00:02:14,414 I am selling TVs at Powerhouse Electronics. 59 00:02:14,459 --> 00:02:16,199 I'm not pitching in the World Series. 60 00:02:16,244 --> 00:02:19,204 Look, son. I know this is not your dream job. 61 00:02:19,247 --> 00:02:21,297 But it doesn't mean that this can't be 62 00:02:21,336 --> 00:02:23,036 a stepping stone to something real. 63 00:02:23,076 --> 00:02:25,466 I mean, with your smarts, and your work ethic, 64 00:02:25,514 --> 00:02:27,294 in a couple years, you could be working yourself 65 00:02:27,342 --> 00:02:28,292 up the corporate ladder. 66 00:02:28,343 --> 00:02:29,563 I don't know, Pop. 67 00:02:29,605 --> 00:02:31,215 I've never worked in sales before. 68 00:02:31,259 --> 00:02:32,609 Well, you're in luck. 69 00:02:32,651 --> 00:02:35,391 I mean, I've had my auto shop for 30 years. 70 00:02:35,437 --> 00:02:38,837 I could teach you all about the ABC's of sales. 71 00:02:38,875 --> 00:02:41,655 Always Be Calvin. 72 00:02:43,749 --> 00:02:45,229 You mean, be grouchy 73 00:02:45,273 --> 00:02:47,233 and always forget to put the toilet seat down? 74 00:02:47,275 --> 00:02:49,455 N-No, babe. 75 00:02:49,494 --> 00:02:50,584 Be confident. 76 00:02:50,626 --> 00:02:52,456 Be charming.Mm-hmm. 77 00:02:52,497 --> 00:02:54,587 And always make it about the customer's needs. 78 00:02:54,630 --> 00:02:57,030 This customer 79 00:02:57,067 --> 00:02:58,897 really needs you to put the toilet seat down. 80 00:03:00,853 --> 00:03:03,553 Okay, babe. Okay. 81 00:03:03,595 --> 00:03:06,075 Look, I'm-a show you how it's done, all right? Marty.All right. 82 00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:07,519 Huh?Pretend to be a customer. 83 00:03:07,556 --> 00:03:09,516 MARTY: Oh, sure. 84 00:03:09,558 --> 00:03:11,478 Excuse me, sir. Do you work here? 85 00:03:11,516 --> 00:03:12,776 Why yes, I do. 86 00:03:16,173 --> 00:03:17,523 How can I help you? 87 00:03:17,566 --> 00:03:18,916 Oh, well, you may want to know 88 00:03:18,958 --> 00:03:20,528 that I was just in the bathroom 89 00:03:20,569 --> 00:03:22,619 and somebody left the toilet seat up. 90 00:03:26,705 --> 00:03:29,495 Well, perhaps you have a question about televisions. 91 00:03:29,534 --> 00:03:31,844 As a matter of fact, I do. 92 00:03:31,884 --> 00:03:34,844 Does this model have VGA and HDMI inputs? 93 00:03:34,887 --> 00:03:37,197 And can it handle both NTSC and PAL frame rates? 94 00:03:37,238 --> 00:03:38,898 'Cause I don't want to be region-locked on a 4K 95 00:03:38,935 --> 00:03:40,285 when 8Ks are right around the corner. 96 00:03:40,328 --> 00:03:41,938 You know what I'm saying, big dog? 97 00:03:41,981 --> 00:03:45,981 I'll handle this, bro. Why don't you go check on them toilets. 98 00:03:49,337 --> 00:03:52,467 I love that we're afternoon friends now. 99 00:03:52,514 --> 00:03:53,864 Yeah, yeah, I know, 100 00:03:53,906 --> 00:03:56,476 but when you said that we would be day drinking, 101 00:03:56,518 --> 00:03:58,698 this is not exactly what I had in mind. 102 00:04:00,565 --> 00:04:03,825 Ooh, Gemma, this Earl Grey tastes like Chardonnay. 103 00:04:03,873 --> 00:04:05,963 The tea cup makes me feel less guilty. 104 00:04:08,094 --> 00:04:10,744 So I see you guys got a piano. Who plays? 105 00:04:10,793 --> 00:04:12,353 Grover started taking lessons, 106 00:04:12,403 --> 00:04:14,623 but he's not really that into it. He doesn't like his teacher. 107 00:04:14,666 --> 00:04:17,456 See, there's your problem right there. 108 00:04:17,495 --> 00:04:21,415 When teaching piano, you have to have fun. 109 00:04:25,460 --> 00:04:27,990 I didn't know you played. 110 00:04:28,027 --> 00:04:30,467 Yeah, I started when I was about Grover's age. 111 00:04:30,508 --> 00:04:33,338 My mom was the church organist. I used to sit next to her 112 00:04:33,381 --> 00:04:35,591 while she'd teach me how to play gospel songs, 113 00:04:35,644 --> 00:04:37,994 but she would add curse words in it to make it fun. 114 00:04:38,037 --> 00:04:42,347 Like "hell-elujah"? 115 00:04:42,390 --> 00:04:44,090 Gemma, that's blasphemous. 116 00:04:45,828 --> 00:04:48,438 Well, I hope Grover can be as good as you someday. 117 00:04:48,483 --> 00:04:50,613 Do you know any fun piano teachers? 118 00:04:50,659 --> 00:04:52,709 Well, I know the most fun one of all... 119 00:04:52,748 --> 00:04:55,488 me. 120 00:04:55,533 --> 00:04:58,623 Oh, my God, that would be so great. 121 00:04:58,667 --> 00:05:00,537 But, are you sure it's not an imposition? 122 00:05:00,582 --> 00:05:04,412 No, not at all. I'll put up with a lot for 50 bucks an hour. 123 00:05:07,676 --> 00:05:11,506 Oh, man, look at the size of these TVs. 124 00:05:11,549 --> 00:05:12,769 I know. 125 00:05:12,811 --> 00:05:15,681 My first TV, the screen was this big. 126 00:05:15,727 --> 00:05:18,207 My first TV was black and white. Huh. 127 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,811 Kind of like you and me. 128 00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:23,513 Yeah, except I can't turn you off. 129 00:05:26,434 --> 00:05:28,134 What are you guys doing here? 130 00:05:28,174 --> 00:05:30,434 Well, your dad just wanted to see you in action. 131 00:05:30,481 --> 00:05:32,131 Yeah, and I was halfway down the driveway 132 00:05:32,178 --> 00:05:35,578 when Dave jumped in the back of my truck. 133 00:05:35,617 --> 00:05:37,927 Well, I appreciate you guys coming out to support me, 134 00:05:37,967 --> 00:05:39,357 but, uh, I'm on the clock. 135 00:05:39,403 --> 00:05:42,573 Oh, look how professional he is. 136 00:05:42,624 --> 00:05:46,674 Yeah, got his shirt all tucked in and his khakis. 137 00:05:48,281 --> 00:05:51,631 Hi there. Are you gentlemen being taken care of? 138 00:05:51,676 --> 00:05:53,196 Are you kidding? 139 00:05:53,243 --> 00:05:56,633 This is the most impressive salesman I've ever met. 140 00:05:56,681 --> 00:05:58,241 I mean, tell me the truth, 141 00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:01,381 how many times has he been employee of the month? 142 00:06:01,425 --> 00:06:03,815 Uh, well, actually, this is his first day. 143 00:06:03,862 --> 00:06:06,032 What?What? 144 00:06:06,082 --> 00:06:09,432 Uh-uh. Uh-uh. 145 00:06:09,477 --> 00:06:12,527 Well, you know, you have one heck of a salesman 146 00:06:12,567 --> 00:06:15,137 here in, uh... 147 00:06:15,178 --> 00:06:16,878 Malcolm. Yeah. 148 00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:19,399 Let me guess, these are your dads? 149 00:06:21,097 --> 00:06:23,057 Yup. They sure are. 150 00:06:23,099 --> 00:06:26,669 Oh, no, we are not. I'm his dad. 151 00:06:26,711 --> 00:06:29,931 And I'm his neighbor, but we're best friends. 152 00:06:33,501 --> 00:06:35,711 Okay, well, if you don't mind, 153 00:06:35,764 --> 00:06:37,414 there's a lady over there who's actually interested 154 00:06:37,461 --> 00:06:40,371 in buying something.Oh, please. 155 00:06:42,379 --> 00:06:44,519 Can you believe that guy 156 00:06:44,555 --> 00:06:46,685 actually thought we were a couple? 157 00:06:46,731 --> 00:06:49,251 Please, you could do worse. 158 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:56,180 Okay, Grover, I guarantee you this piano lesson 159 00:06:56,219 --> 00:06:57,789 is gonna be a lot more fun. 160 00:06:57,829 --> 00:06:59,309 How do you know? 161 00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:01,132 Because I've already had my tea. 162 00:07:02,747 --> 00:07:04,097 Now, the first step 163 00:07:04,140 --> 00:07:06,190 is to visualize your audience. 164 00:07:06,229 --> 00:07:07,799 I like to imagine 165 00:07:07,839 --> 00:07:10,499 that I'm walking on stage 166 00:07:10,538 --> 00:07:13,108 at the Apollo Theater. 167 00:07:13,149 --> 00:07:16,289 Oh, oh, thank you. 168 00:07:16,326 --> 00:07:18,026 Oh, thank you. 169 00:07:18,067 --> 00:07:21,807 Oh, hello. 170 00:07:21,853 --> 00:07:24,813 Who are you waving at?Quincy Jones. 171 00:07:24,856 --> 00:07:27,596 Who's that?Just a guy I used to date. 172 00:07:27,642 --> 00:07:30,292 Okay, now-now, come on, show me 173 00:07:30,340 --> 00:07:31,650 how you're gonna walk onto the stage. 174 00:07:35,476 --> 00:07:37,606 Hi, Mom. 175 00:07:37,652 --> 00:07:40,822 Oh, come on, Grove, that's all you got? 176 00:07:40,872 --> 00:07:42,522 Listen, these imaginary people 177 00:07:42,570 --> 00:07:44,710 paid a lot of money to come see you. 178 00:07:44,746 --> 00:07:48,096 Now strut your stuff, man. Come on. 179 00:07:48,140 --> 00:07:49,670 Uh-huh, okay. 180 00:07:49,707 --> 00:07:52,017 That's good. 181 00:07:52,057 --> 00:07:54,237 Okay. Get it. 182 00:07:54,277 --> 00:07:56,847 Oh, okay. 183 00:07:56,888 --> 00:08:00,108 All right, all right. 184 00:08:00,152 --> 00:08:03,672 Little rock star, you haven't dropped the album as of yet. 185 00:08:03,721 --> 00:08:07,021 Now, most teachers teach you how to play music. 186 00:08:07,072 --> 00:08:09,462 I'm gonna teach you how to feel music. 187 00:08:09,510 --> 00:08:11,780 Tell me how this makes you feel. 188 00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:20,000 Scared. Mm. 189 00:08:20,042 --> 00:08:22,562 Like getting your credit ran at a furniture store. 190 00:08:25,264 --> 00:08:27,264 Now how about this? 191 00:08:30,095 --> 00:08:33,445 Happy? Oh! 192 00:08:33,490 --> 00:08:34,670 Like getting your credit approved, 193 00:08:34,709 --> 00:08:36,149 now you can get that waterbed! 194 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:41,200 Can I just go back to waving at my fans now? 195 00:08:41,237 --> 00:08:43,587 Yeah, but they're not gonna cheer you on 196 00:08:43,631 --> 00:08:45,371 unless you play something, baby. 197 00:08:45,415 --> 00:08:47,375 You're right. Yeah. 198 00:08:47,417 --> 00:08:49,987 Good thing our piano has this demo button. 199 00:08:56,948 --> 00:09:00,738 Okay, mama's gonna need some more tea. I'll be back. 200 00:09:04,086 --> 00:09:05,606 Hey, Trevor, you wanted to see me? 201 00:09:05,653 --> 00:09:07,433 Yeah, come on in. 202 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,530 I was looking over the receipts, and you sold four TVs today? 203 00:09:10,571 --> 00:09:12,261 Is that a good thing? 204 00:09:12,311 --> 00:09:14,001 Yeah, yeah, four TVs is great. 205 00:09:14,052 --> 00:09:16,612 Thank God. Man, I thought I was in trouble. 206 00:09:16,664 --> 00:09:18,624 Oh, you are. 207 00:09:18,666 --> 00:09:22,016 Does it have something to do with one of my two dads? 208 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:24,500 Malcolm, it's great that you sold four TVs, 209 00:09:24,541 --> 00:09:26,841 but we make our real money on peripherals. 210 00:09:26,891 --> 00:09:30,151 You know, cables, warranties, home installations. 211 00:09:30,199 --> 00:09:32,469 Yeah, I offered that to all of my customers, 212 00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,895 but nobody was interested. 213 00:09:33,942 --> 00:09:36,552 Then you have to convince people that they need them. 214 00:09:36,597 --> 00:09:38,857 Like that little old lady you sold to earlier. 215 00:09:38,903 --> 00:09:40,733 If you had told her she needed a warranty, 216 00:09:40,775 --> 00:09:42,385 she would've bought it. 217 00:09:42,428 --> 00:09:45,648 She was 80 years old, man. She didn't need a 15-year warranty. 218 00:09:47,477 --> 00:09:50,617 Then why didn't you sign her up for our in-store credit card? 219 00:09:50,654 --> 00:09:52,004 With 18% interest? 220 00:09:52,047 --> 00:09:53,877 Exactly. See, that's how we really get them. 221 00:09:55,224 --> 00:09:57,614 Now go back out there and make me proud. 222 00:09:57,661 --> 00:10:00,051 Oh, and push the 65-inch Hamagakis. 223 00:10:00,098 --> 00:10:02,278 They're about to be recalled for exploding. 224 00:10:02,318 --> 00:10:05,538 Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, Trevor, I don't think I'm comfortable 225 00:10:05,582 --> 00:10:07,492 selling people stuff they don't need, man, 226 00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:10,460 or that should come with a fire extinguisher. 227 00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:12,680 Okay, got it. Totally understand. 228 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:14,550 Cool. You're fired. 229 00:10:14,591 --> 00:10:16,541 What? 230 00:10:16,593 --> 00:10:18,853 Look, man, clearly you're a good guy. 231 00:10:18,900 --> 00:10:21,470 If I knew that, I wouldn't have hired you. 232 00:10:21,511 --> 00:10:23,811 Hold on, let's not be too hasty, all right. 233 00:10:23,861 --> 00:10:26,511 I am not such a good guy. I can do much worse. 234 00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:30,049 Mm, nah, man, not buying it. I feel like you're lying to me, 235 00:10:30,085 --> 00:10:31,865 which is good, but too late. 236 00:10:31,913 --> 00:10:34,343 All right, fine. 237 00:10:34,393 --> 00:10:37,303 But I hope one of them Hamagakis blows up in your face. 238 00:10:37,353 --> 00:10:38,653 No, you don't. 239 00:10:38,702 --> 00:10:40,052 Damn, you're right. I don't. 240 00:10:51,889 --> 00:10:53,849 Congratulations!Congratulations! 241 00:10:54,979 --> 00:10:56,899 You did it! 242 00:11:03,945 --> 00:11:05,595 Sorry about that. 243 00:11:05,642 --> 00:11:08,382 Probably should've thrown that from farther away. 244 00:11:09,428 --> 00:11:11,428 Uh, wow, guys. 245 00:11:11,474 --> 00:11:12,994 You shouldn't have. 246 00:11:13,041 --> 00:11:14,781 You really shouldn't have. 247 00:11:14,825 --> 00:11:17,345 Yeah, man. I agree. 248 00:11:17,393 --> 00:11:18,743 It's just your first day. And some of us 249 00:11:18,786 --> 00:11:20,566 have been employed for years, you know, 250 00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:23,353 as a rocket scientist. 251 00:11:23,399 --> 00:11:26,409 Have you ever sold anybody a rocket? 252 00:11:26,445 --> 00:11:28,405 Daddy, that's not how it works, man. 253 00:11:30,406 --> 00:11:32,536 We're just so happy for you. 254 00:11:32,582 --> 00:11:34,532 Yeah. Way to go, Malcolm. 255 00:11:34,584 --> 00:11:36,364 Oh.Aw. 256 00:11:36,412 --> 00:11:38,192 Hey, thanks, little man. 257 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,200 Son, you know I've been hard on you 258 00:11:41,243 --> 00:11:43,153 these last couple years, but... 259 00:11:43,201 --> 00:11:44,631 seeing you at work today, 260 00:11:44,681 --> 00:11:46,551 I'm proud of you, son. 261 00:11:47,771 --> 00:11:49,421 So, how was your first day? 262 00:11:49,468 --> 00:11:50,948 It was, um... 263 00:11:50,992 --> 00:11:52,382 unbelievable. 264 00:11:52,428 --> 00:11:54,088 Yeah, it was! 265 00:11:54,125 --> 00:11:56,735 All right! 266 00:12:03,831 --> 00:12:06,781 Come on, son. Everybody wants to hear about your day. 267 00:12:06,834 --> 00:12:08,614 Um, you know, Pop, I, um... 268 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,701 I sold some stuff, people bought some stuff, 269 00:12:10,751 --> 00:12:14,051 and then I talked to my boss about my future at the company. 270 00:12:14,102 --> 00:12:16,052 See, that's what I'm talking about right there. 271 00:12:16,104 --> 00:12:17,274 See? 272 00:12:17,322 --> 00:12:18,622 Does anybody want to hear about my day? 273 00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:21,541 Today, my satellite discovered a new supernova. 274 00:12:21,587 --> 00:12:23,027 Okay, not now, Marty. Listen, 275 00:12:23,067 --> 00:12:24,507 um... 276 00:12:24,547 --> 00:12:27,117 so, did you use any of my techniques? 277 00:12:27,158 --> 00:12:29,118 Uh, every single one of 'em, Pop. 278 00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:30,820 That's my boy right there. 279 00:12:30,858 --> 00:12:31,988 Just sayin', 280 00:12:32,033 --> 00:12:34,253 I am also your boy. 281 00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:36,126 So, did you 282 00:12:36,167 --> 00:12:38,257 use any of my techniques today? 283 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:41,050 Well, I repositioned a telemetry transponder 284 00:12:41,085 --> 00:12:42,825 from 60 million miles away. 285 00:12:42,870 --> 00:12:44,400 So all I'm hearing is "no." 286 00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:50,225 So, Grover said his piano lesson went great. 287 00:12:50,268 --> 00:12:52,708 Ah. Yeah, he danced for five minutes, 288 00:12:52,749 --> 00:12:55,149 gave me his autograph, and then quit. 289 00:12:55,186 --> 00:12:56,836 What? He quit? 290 00:12:56,884 --> 00:12:58,104 Yeah. He dropped the mic, 291 00:12:58,146 --> 00:13:00,106 threw two fingers to the sky, and said, 292 00:13:00,148 --> 00:13:03,588 "Peace out, Pasadena! Grover has left the building!" 293 00:13:03,629 --> 00:13:06,939 No, he can't quit. 294 00:13:06,981 --> 00:13:08,451 I stopped taking lessons when I was his age, 295 00:13:08,504 --> 00:13:10,374 and I've regretted it ever since. 296 00:13:10,419 --> 00:13:12,429 Oh, wow. I didn't know you wanted to play. 297 00:13:12,464 --> 00:13:14,854 Yeah. 298 00:13:14,902 --> 00:13:17,592 I have this fantasy where I'm at a boring party, 299 00:13:17,643 --> 00:13:20,083 but there's a piano across the room. 300 00:13:20,124 --> 00:13:21,164 The crowd parts. 301 00:13:21,212 --> 00:13:22,602 I float over to it 302 00:13:22,648 --> 00:13:24,608 and start tickling those ivories. 303 00:13:24,650 --> 00:13:25,960 Next thing you know, 304 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,880 there's a crowd gathered around me making requests. 305 00:13:27,915 --> 00:13:30,095 And for some reason, Brad Pitt is sitting next to me 306 00:13:30,134 --> 00:13:31,914 with his shirt off. 307 00:13:33,007 --> 00:13:35,187 So, you're making Grover take lessons 308 00:13:35,226 --> 00:13:37,186 because you regret giving it up. 309 00:13:38,229 --> 00:13:40,109 Well, yeah. 310 00:13:41,537 --> 00:13:43,847 Isn't living vicariously through our kids 311 00:13:43,887 --> 00:13:46,197 half the reason why we have them in the first place? 312 00:13:46,237 --> 00:13:48,457 Why don't you stop forcing Grover 313 00:13:48,500 --> 00:13:50,250 to do something he doesn't want to do 314 00:13:50,285 --> 00:13:52,375 and let me give you lessons instead? 315 00:13:52,417 --> 00:13:55,157 Oh, I don't know. It seems like it's too late to start now. 316 00:13:55,203 --> 00:13:56,633 You're right. You're getting old. 317 00:13:56,682 --> 00:13:57,812 You might break a hip. 318 00:13:59,294 --> 00:14:01,254 Okay, fine. I'll give it a shot. 319 00:14:01,296 --> 00:14:03,166 Okay. Oh. And for the record, 320 00:14:03,211 --> 00:14:04,771 which Brad Pitt are we talking about? 321 00:14:04,821 --> 00:14:05,951 Fight ClubBrad. 322 00:14:05,996 --> 00:14:07,216 Ooh! That's a good Brad. 323 00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,354 Malcolm? 324 00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:17,096 Oh, hey, Dave. What's up? 325 00:14:17,138 --> 00:14:19,358 Hey, what are you doing here? I thought you had work today... 326 00:14:20,532 --> 00:14:22,272 Oh, no. 327 00:14:22,317 --> 00:14:24,277 Look, Dave, I can explain, man. 328 00:14:24,319 --> 00:14:26,279 I just realized that if I had been wearing a suit, too, 329 00:14:26,321 --> 00:14:28,451 we would look just like Men in Black. 330 00:14:30,803 --> 00:14:33,983 Yep, that is a missed opportunity, Dave. 331 00:14:35,330 --> 00:14:37,730 Wait, are these job applications? 332 00:14:37,767 --> 00:14:41,117 Yeah. Look, the truth is, 333 00:14:41,162 --> 00:14:44,162 I got fired yesterday, man.What? Why? 334 00:14:44,208 --> 00:14:46,168 Because they wanted me to do some sleazy stuff 335 00:14:46,210 --> 00:14:47,820 that I wasn't comfortable with. 336 00:14:47,864 --> 00:14:49,604 Whoa. 337 00:14:49,648 --> 00:14:52,388 You mean, like, sex stuff? 338 00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:56,394 No, man. No, I mean, like, ripping off old ladies. 339 00:14:56,438 --> 00:14:58,138 Oh-- whoa. 340 00:14:58,179 --> 00:14:59,449 Well, that's bad, too. 341 00:15:02,183 --> 00:15:04,833 What'd your dad say? 342 00:15:04,881 --> 00:15:08,051 I haven't told him yet. I mean, you saw him yesterday. 343 00:15:08,102 --> 00:15:10,622 He hasn't looked at me like that since I was playing ball, man. 344 00:15:10,669 --> 00:15:12,279 He was in a pretty great mood. 345 00:15:12,323 --> 00:15:13,883 You know, after we left your store, 346 00:15:13,934 --> 00:15:15,284 all he wanted to do was hang out together. 347 00:15:16,719 --> 00:15:18,069 We even split a giant pretzel. 348 00:15:18,112 --> 00:15:20,542 Wait, he split one with you? 349 00:15:20,592 --> 00:15:22,112 Not evenly. 350 00:15:23,334 --> 00:15:25,114 Yeah, well, I can't believe 351 00:15:25,162 --> 00:15:28,252 I finally landed a job and get fired on my first day. 352 00:15:28,296 --> 00:15:30,036 That's humiliating. 353 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,740 Well, you know what? Maybe it's a good thing. 354 00:15:31,777 --> 00:15:33,257 You don't want to be stuck in a job 355 00:15:33,301 --> 00:15:35,431 that goes against your morals. 356 00:15:35,477 --> 00:15:37,087 Yeah, but I got to do something. 357 00:15:37,131 --> 00:15:41,431 You will. You're a smart, hardworking good guy. 358 00:15:41,483 --> 00:15:43,223 A-And I'm not just saying that 359 00:15:43,267 --> 00:15:44,927 because I'm one of your two dads. 360 00:15:48,707 --> 00:15:51,147 Oh, hey, Calvin. You going somewhere? 361 00:15:51,188 --> 00:15:53,018 You know, I thought I'd surprise Malcolm at work 362 00:15:53,060 --> 00:15:54,240 and take him out to lunch. 363 00:15:54,278 --> 00:15:57,328 Uh... d-don't do that. 364 00:15:57,368 --> 00:15:59,068 Why not? 365 00:15:59,109 --> 00:16:02,989 'Cause I was thinking, we had such a nice time yesterday, 366 00:16:03,026 --> 00:16:07,166 maybe... maybe we should go try a pretzel someplace else. 367 00:16:09,337 --> 00:16:12,207 You know, maybe do a little Pasadena pretzel crawl. 368 00:16:12,253 --> 00:16:14,993 That's a hard pass, Dave. 369 00:16:15,038 --> 00:16:17,258 Hey, but, uh, bring me home one. 370 00:16:18,607 --> 00:16:21,217 All right, well, you got it. 371 00:16:21,262 --> 00:16:23,612 All right, well, you have a good time. 372 00:16:23,655 --> 00:16:26,175 Bye, now. We'll see you later. 373 00:16:29,313 --> 00:16:32,273 Uh-- yeah, hey, M-Malcolm. Yeah, it's Dave. 374 00:16:32,316 --> 00:16:35,056 Your dad is on his way to the store. 375 00:16:35,102 --> 00:16:37,232 No, no, I didn't tell him anything. 376 00:16:37,278 --> 00:16:39,238 I tried to stop him, but apparently, 377 00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:41,330 I made more of our pretzel experience than he did, 378 00:16:41,369 --> 00:16:45,289 which totally backfired, 'cause now I got to go get him one. 379 00:16:50,334 --> 00:16:52,334 Hey, Pop. Oh. 380 00:16:52,380 --> 00:16:54,260 Hey.Hey, there you are, man. 381 00:16:54,295 --> 00:16:55,645 I've been looking all over for you. 382 00:16:55,687 --> 00:16:57,077 Yeah, yeah, I was, uh... 383 00:16:57,124 --> 00:16:58,474 I was back there in a meeting. 384 00:16:58,516 --> 00:17:00,436 Mm, must be very important. 385 00:17:00,475 --> 00:17:03,085 I see you got your suit on.: Yeah. 386 00:17:03,130 --> 00:17:05,480 Uh-- are they talking about making you manager already? 387 00:17:05,523 --> 00:17:06,783 Oh, well, they definitely said I wouldn't be 388 00:17:06,829 --> 00:17:07,959 in this position long. 389 00:17:09,875 --> 00:17:12,615 All right. Well, I just came by to take you out to lunch. 390 00:17:12,661 --> 00:17:15,311 Oh, great, man, I'm starving. Let's go right now. 391 00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:17,839 Oh, hold on. Don't you have to check with your boss first? 392 00:17:17,883 --> 00:17:19,843 No, no. After our talk yesterday, 393 00:17:19,885 --> 00:17:22,975 I pretty much make up my own hours. 394 00:17:23,019 --> 00:17:25,809 Well, all right. That's good right there. But you know what? 395 00:17:25,848 --> 00:17:27,198 Before we go, 396 00:17:27,241 --> 00:17:28,981 I've been thinking about taking a look at some 397 00:17:29,025 --> 00:17:30,335 of these flat-screens right here, 398 00:17:30,374 --> 00:17:32,244 take advantage of that employee discount. 399 00:17:32,289 --> 00:17:33,559 Oh, hey, Pop. 400 00:17:33,595 --> 00:17:35,205 Pop, you don't need a new TV, man. 401 00:17:35,249 --> 00:17:36,649 You know what you need? 402 00:17:36,685 --> 00:17:38,555 Uh-- this. 403 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,040 A baby monitor?Yup. Yeah. 404 00:17:41,081 --> 00:17:42,291 I-It doesn't just monitor babies. 405 00:17:42,343 --> 00:17:44,433 You can listen to what mom says about you 406 00:17:44,475 --> 00:17:47,085 when you're not around. Huh? 407 00:17:47,130 --> 00:17:49,660 It would be nice to hear all those compliments. 408 00:17:49,698 --> 00:17:51,788 All right. That is great. 409 00:17:51,830 --> 00:17:53,450 I will ring it up for you 410 00:17:53,484 --> 00:17:55,874 and bring it home after my shift. Let's go. 411 00:17:55,921 --> 00:17:58,441 Malcolm. 412 00:17:58,489 --> 00:17:59,449 What are you doing here? 413 00:17:59,490 --> 00:18:00,670 Uh, nothing. Uh, uh, 414 00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:02,629 just going out to lunch with my dad. 415 00:18:02,667 --> 00:18:04,407 H-Hold on. What, 416 00:18:04,452 --> 00:18:06,232 what does he mean by, "What are you doing here?" 417 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,460 I mean he doesn't work here anymore. 418 00:18:09,718 --> 00:18:11,378 What? 419 00:18:11,415 --> 00:18:13,065 I got fired yesterday, Pop. 420 00:18:13,113 --> 00:18:15,853 Fired? How is that even possible? 421 00:18:15,898 --> 00:18:17,858 I mean, how bad do you have to be at something 422 00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:20,120 to get fired on your first damn day? 423 00:18:20,163 --> 00:18:22,383 TREVOR: Pretty bad, actually. 424 00:18:22,426 --> 00:18:24,906 He refused to do the job. 425 00:18:24,950 --> 00:18:26,570 Damn it, Malcolm. 426 00:18:26,604 --> 00:18:29,254 I mean, how can you refuse to do anything? 427 00:18:29,303 --> 00:18:31,783 What I refused to do was rip people off, Pop, 428 00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:33,267 and sell exploding TVs to old ladies. 429 00:18:33,307 --> 00:18:36,267 Hey, you could've sold those TVs to anyone. 430 00:18:36,310 --> 00:18:41,010 Oh, h-hold on, now. You wanted him to sell exploding TVs? 431 00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:44,183 Yes, but with an extended warranty. I'm not a monster. 432 00:18:44,231 --> 00:18:48,191 All right, look, Pop, man, I want you to be proud of me, 433 00:18:48,235 --> 00:18:50,495 but not if that means I can't be proud of myself. 434 00:18:50,541 --> 00:18:52,361 Look, man, don't overthink it. 435 00:18:52,413 --> 00:18:54,763 Some people just aren't cut out for success. 436 00:18:54,806 --> 00:18:57,546 Oh, oh, oh. Hold on, now. 437 00:18:57,592 --> 00:18:59,762 My son is gonna be a success. 438 00:18:59,811 --> 00:19:01,461 Because he has integrity 439 00:19:01,509 --> 00:19:03,519 and heart and principles, 440 00:19:03,554 --> 00:19:06,424 and that's why I know my son is gonna rise to the top. 441 00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:09,220 He's not gonna be some bottom-feeder like you. 442 00:19:10,387 --> 00:19:12,387 All right, whatever. 443 00:19:12,433 --> 00:19:15,433 I just came out of my office to chat up 444 00:19:15,479 --> 00:19:19,009 that hot pregnant lady I saw on the security camera. 445 00:19:19,048 --> 00:19:20,268 Bye. 446 00:19:22,660 --> 00:19:25,060 Dude's a jackass. 447 00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:27,497 Yeah, look, Pop, I was gonna tell you the truth, man, 448 00:19:27,535 --> 00:19:30,235 but I just wanted to find another job first. 449 00:19:30,277 --> 00:19:31,497 Look, man, 450 00:19:31,539 --> 00:19:33,889 I know I put a lot of pressure on you, 451 00:19:33,932 --> 00:19:36,452 but you never have to lie to me about doing the right thing. 452 00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:39,680 Cool. Thanks, Pop. 453 00:19:39,721 --> 00:19:42,241 All right. So how about we get that lunch? 454 00:19:42,289 --> 00:19:44,559 Sounds good to me. Where we going? 455 00:19:44,595 --> 00:19:46,685 First restaurant we see with a "help wanted" sign. 456 00:19:57,304 --> 00:19:58,784 How's it going, Mom? 457 00:19:58,827 --> 00:20:02,047 Uh, okay, but it's harder than I thought. 458 00:20:02,091 --> 00:20:03,741 Maybe you should have some tea. 459 00:20:06,095 --> 00:20:08,275 Miss Tina says it makes everything better. 460 00:20:09,533 --> 00:20:12,273 What else did Miss Tina teach you? 461 00:20:12,319 --> 00:20:14,279 Well, she taught me to always start 462 00:20:14,321 --> 00:20:16,011 by waving to your audience. 463 00:20:16,061 --> 00:20:17,881 Hey, Quincy. 464 00:20:19,456 --> 00:20:21,716 Now, let's start with a simple scale. 465 00:20:21,763 --> 00:20:23,503 Okay. 466 00:20:29,988 --> 00:20:32,948 Grover, that's really good. 467 00:20:32,991 --> 00:20:34,941 I thought you didn't like playing piano. 468 00:20:34,993 --> 00:20:39,213 I didn't. But I think maybe I like playing with you. 469 00:20:40,869 --> 00:20:43,879 Well, we could take lessons from Miss Tina together. 470 00:20:43,915 --> 00:20:45,175 That sounds fun. 471 00:20:45,221 --> 00:20:48,311 But first, let's give some love to our fans. 472 00:20:48,355 --> 00:20:49,445 Yeah. 473 00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:55,320 Who are you waving at? 474 00:20:55,362 --> 00:20:57,452 Oh, just this guy named Brad. 475 00:20:57,494 --> 00:21:00,494 Captioning sponsored by CBS 476 00:21:04,109 --> 00:21:06,119 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org