1
00:00:08,878 --> 00:00:11,141
Thanks again for
having us over, Tina.

2
00:00:11,185 --> 00:00:12,664
Yeah, the chicken
and dumplings are delicious.

3
00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:13,883
Aren't they, Grover?

4
00:00:13,926 --> 00:00:16,190
Wow, that isinteresting.

5
00:00:18,148 --> 00:00:20,759
So I had to turn off
my football game for dinner,

6
00:00:20,803 --> 00:00:23,284
but the kid gets to play
world wide webs?

7
00:00:24,763 --> 00:00:26,939
Dad, the "world wide webs,"

8
00:00:26,983 --> 00:00:30,073
or as people under a hundred
call it, the Internet...

9
00:00:31,944 --> 00:00:34,077
...is not a game. It's-it's a,
it's a global network...

10
00:00:34,121 --> 00:00:35,774
Marty... you're
talking to Pop.

11
00:00:35,818 --> 00:00:38,299
The clock is still flashing
12:00 on his VCR.

12
00:00:40,301 --> 00:00:42,912
Which still has a tape of Beverly Hills Cop
stuck in it.

13
00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:44,087
[chuckles]

14
00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:47,264
You know what?
That was due back in 1997.

15
00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,266
Good thing Blockbuster
went out of business, huh?

16
00:00:49,310 --> 00:00:52,182
[all chuckling]

17
00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:54,097
Grover, Mr. Calvin's right.

18
00:00:54,141 --> 00:00:56,317
Didn't we agree
no screens at the table?

19
00:00:56,360 --> 00:01:00,321
Yeah, I wasn't really sure
where we landed on that.

20
00:01:02,018 --> 00:01:04,281
So, Calvin, it looks like your
auto shop has some competition.

21
00:01:04,325 --> 00:01:06,675
I saw a new Motor Boys
opened up down the block.

22
00:01:06,718 --> 00:01:08,677
[scoffs] Please.

23
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:12,637
Some generic chain
with a stupid jingle? [chuckles]

24
00:01:12,681 --> 00:01:14,335
I think it's catchy.

25
00:01:14,378 --> 00:01:16,641
♪ Car or truck,
you're in luck, with the ♪

26
00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:18,687
♪ Motor Boys. ALL: Beep! Beep!

27
00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:21,603
[all chuckling]

28
00:01:21,646 --> 00:01:24,432
Why don't you all go "beep-beep"
yourselves, all right?

29
00:01:25,476 --> 00:01:26,999
Whoa!

30
00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:29,480
Motor Boys
has a really cool website.

31
00:01:29,524 --> 00:01:32,831
Grover! Didn't I just say
no screens at the table?

32
00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:36,357
Oh, so we are
going with that.

33
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,360
You know,

34
00:01:39,403 --> 00:01:41,318
business has slowed down
since they opened up.

35
00:01:41,362 --> 00:01:43,320
Maybe we should think about
updating our shop.

36
00:01:43,364 --> 00:01:45,235
Oh, I could upgrade
your computer system.

37
00:01:45,279 --> 00:01:46,497
Automate your payroll.

38
00:01:46,541 --> 00:01:47,803
Maybe make
you a website

39
00:01:47,846 --> 00:01:48,978
that's not just
a picture of you

40
00:01:49,021 --> 00:01:50,458
laying across the
hood of a Corvette?

41
00:01:53,461 --> 00:01:56,072
While you're at it,
will you fix his e-mail?

42
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,466
I send him stuff all the time.

43
00:01:58,509 --> 00:02:00,381
[chuckling]:
I never get a reply.

44
00:02:02,078 --> 00:02:04,863
Yeah, that's weird, huh?

45
00:02:04,907 --> 00:02:06,909
So what do
you say, Calvin?

46
00:02:06,952 --> 00:02:08,040
Can Marty help us out?

47
00:02:08,084 --> 00:02:10,391
Why not?
You can come in tomorrow.

48
00:02:10,434 --> 00:02:12,349
And I'll start working
on a jingle for you.

49
00:02:12,393 --> 00:02:15,961
Ooh, great.
E-mail it to me.

50
00:02:16,005 --> 00:02:17,920
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪

51
00:02:17,963 --> 00:02:19,226
♪ Welcome to the hood.

52
00:02:23,273 --> 00:02:25,884
So what goes down at an
overnight teachers' retreat?

53
00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:27,408
Oh, we have so much fun.

54
00:02:27,451 --> 00:02:30,715
PowerPoint presentations,
course lectures,

55
00:02:30,759 --> 00:02:31,890
and-- wait for it--

56
00:02:31,934 --> 00:02:34,850
we all come home
with a huge binder!

57
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:38,723
My God, I married
the world's hottest nerd.

58
00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:40,725
[chuckling]

59
00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:41,900
All right, sweetie,
be good for Dad.

60
00:02:41,944 --> 00:02:43,119
I'll see you tomorrow.

61
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:46,078
I don't know.
Probably in my room?

62
00:02:47,950 --> 00:02:49,908
You know what? You've been
on that thing a lot.

63
00:02:49,952 --> 00:02:51,910
Why don't we take a little
screen break for a few days?

64
00:02:51,954 --> 00:02:54,783
A few days?
That's so unfair.

65
00:02:54,826 --> 00:02:56,437
No, come on.
It's a good thing.

66
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,178
Look, you can play
outside, climb some trees,

67
00:02:58,221 --> 00:02:59,788
ride your bike around.

68
00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:04,314
Okay, if I say I'm sorry,
can I not do any of that?

69
00:03:04,358 --> 00:03:06,577
All right, sweetie, I got to go.
Give me a hug.

70
00:03:06,621 --> 00:03:09,014
I'll miss you, Mom.

71
00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:11,060
So, so...I'm with Dad.

72
00:03:11,103 --> 00:03:13,802
Bye.
Cheer up.

73
00:03:13,845 --> 00:03:15,238
You're gonna
have so much fun.

74
00:03:15,282 --> 00:03:17,066
It's gonna be great.

75
00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:19,111
It's gonna be terrible.

76
00:03:20,983 --> 00:03:22,593
What are you talking about?

77
00:03:22,637 --> 00:03:24,682
I have tried
the "no screens" thing before,

78
00:03:24,726 --> 00:03:26,815
and it always ends
in tears and tantrums.

79
00:03:26,858 --> 00:03:29,339
Well, if he throws a tantrum,

80
00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,428
I will deal with it.

81
00:03:31,472 --> 00:03:34,257
I was talking about me.

82
00:03:34,301 --> 00:03:37,173
You've just committed
yourself to 48 hours of:

83
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,827
"Dad. Dad.

84
00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,394
Dad. Dad."

85
00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:42,483
And I will
come back with,

86
00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:44,920
"What's up? I'm here.

87
00:03:44,963 --> 00:03:46,008
Let's rage."

88
00:03:46,051 --> 00:03:48,184
[chuckling]: Ho-ho.
Oh, don't worry.

89
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,186
There will be rage.

90
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,796
You know, I'm starting
to get the feeling

91
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:53,450
that you don't think
I can do this.

92
00:03:53,494 --> 00:03:55,278
Don't take this the wrong
way, but if Icouldn't,

93
00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:57,454
you definitely can't.

94
00:03:57,498 --> 00:04:00,283
Ho-ho! Really?

95
00:04:00,327 --> 00:04:03,112
Well, what you don't realize
is I have something you don't.

96
00:04:04,331 --> 00:04:07,203
The mind of
an eight-year-old boy.

97
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,814
Finally, something we agree on.

98
00:04:12,339 --> 00:04:14,732
Okay. We're off
to a great start.

99
00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:16,995
The TV in your waiting room
now gets more than one channel.

100
00:04:17,039 --> 00:04:18,997
Oh, great.
How did you do that?

101
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:20,608
Well, not to get
too technical,

102
00:04:20,651 --> 00:04:23,045
but I put new batteries
in the remote.

103
00:04:25,003 --> 00:04:27,789
The remote? Calvin,
you told me it was stolen.

104
00:04:27,832 --> 00:04:29,094
Yeah.

105
00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:32,141
Uh, looks like
I fired Eduardo for nothing.

106
00:04:33,795 --> 00:04:35,927
Well, thanks for your help, man.

107
00:04:35,971 --> 00:04:38,365
Be sure to treat yourself
to a hard candy on the way out.

108
00:04:40,062 --> 00:04:42,325
Calvin, look. You may not
want Marty's help,

109
00:04:42,369 --> 00:04:45,110
but as the person who keeps
the books around here, I do.

110
00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:48,636
Well, fine. We're watching
Beverly Hills Cop IItonight.

111
00:04:48,679 --> 00:04:52,770
That's right. I used a
butter knife to get Part Iout.

112
00:04:52,814 --> 00:04:56,121
Okay, Marty, what's next?

113
00:04:56,165 --> 00:04:58,167
Well, let's take a look at
how you organize your invoices.

114
00:04:58,210 --> 00:05:00,604
Oh. Okay, everything's
stored right over here.

115
00:05:00,648 --> 00:05:02,954
Oh, file cabinet.
Old school.

116
00:05:02,998 --> 00:05:04,260
Nike.

117
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,784
So, that's August 2012.

118
00:05:09,134 --> 00:05:11,049
This is how you
keep your records?

119
00:05:11,093 --> 00:05:13,443
How do you
keep anything organized?

120
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:15,053
These are
barely receipts.

121
00:05:15,097 --> 00:05:17,534
"Herman, $200"?
What'd you do for Herman?

122
00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:19,144
It says it right here.

123
00:05:19,188 --> 00:05:21,146
$200 worth of work.

124
00:05:23,540 --> 00:05:24,628
Yeah, but,

125
00:05:24,672 --> 00:05:26,282
but what specifically
did you do?

126
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,502
Well, if you
want to know that,

127
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:30,112
then we gonna
have to call Eduardo.

128
00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:32,767
How do you say,

129
00:05:32,810 --> 00:05:34,725
"Oops, my bad"
in Spanish?

130
00:05:36,988 --> 00:05:38,816
That was so much fun.
What's next?

131
00:05:42,516 --> 00:05:46,128
Grover. We just did mini-golf,
batting cages,

132
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:48,086
we even went to the dog park.

133
00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:49,349
We don't have a dog.

134
00:05:51,438 --> 00:05:52,482
Aren't you tired?

135
00:05:52,526 --> 00:05:54,441
Not at all.

136
00:05:54,484 --> 00:05:59,141
Ooh. I thought all that fetching
would tire you out.

137
00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:02,710
So, now what?

138
00:06:02,753 --> 00:06:04,451
How about this?

139
00:06:04,494 --> 00:06:06,191
How about we take
a five-minute break

140
00:06:06,235 --> 00:06:08,106
so Dad can rest his eyes?

141
00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:09,412
Okay.

142
00:06:09,456 --> 00:06:11,240
Whew...

143
00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:15,418
How will I know
when it's been five minutes?

144
00:06:15,462 --> 00:06:18,247
I'll tell you.

145
00:06:19,509 --> 00:06:20,597
How will youknow?

146
00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:24,166
Buddy...

147
00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:26,081
look around you. You
have all these toys.

148
00:06:26,124 --> 00:06:28,475
You've got a
big backyard.

149
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:30,259
You've got a
room upstairs.

150
00:06:30,302 --> 00:06:34,002
Can you really find noway
to entertain yourself?

151
00:06:34,045 --> 00:06:36,178
I have an idea.Oh, good.

152
00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:37,658
Screen time!

153
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:40,225
Grover!
Drop it!

154
00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:41,270
Bad boy!

155
00:06:43,098 --> 00:06:45,448
Sorry.
I'm still in dog park mode.

156
00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:48,320
Listen. Come
here, buddy.

157
00:06:50,192 --> 00:06:52,629
It would make
my life...

158
00:06:52,673 --> 00:06:56,067
[chuckles]
so much easier

159
00:06:56,111 --> 00:06:57,286
if I gave this to you.

160
00:06:57,329 --> 00:06:59,157
I don't know, Dad.

161
00:06:59,201 --> 00:07:01,899
Trust your instincts.

162
00:07:01,943 --> 00:07:06,077
But Mom doesn't think that we
can go a few days without it.

163
00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:08,253
And I want to prove
to her that we can.

164
00:07:09,341 --> 00:07:11,213
Which is why...

165
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:13,215
you're not gonna tell her
that I'm gonna let you

166
00:07:13,258 --> 00:07:14,999
play with this
for a few minutes.

167
00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:16,174
Yes!

168
00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:18,176
But remember,
we're not telling Mom.

169
00:07:18,220 --> 00:07:20,831
Mom who?Oh...

170
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:23,617
Okay, Dad. I just finished
setting up your new system.

171
00:07:23,660 --> 00:07:26,184
This tablet controls
all your scheduling,

172
00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:27,969
estimates
and service notes.

173
00:07:28,012 --> 00:07:30,014
Does it have
Angry Birdson there?

174
00:07:31,363 --> 00:07:34,584
'Cause I love pissing off
them uppity pigs.

175
00:07:35,629 --> 00:07:37,021
Hey, Calvin.

176
00:07:37,065 --> 00:07:38,414
Hey, what's up, Roy?

177
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,198
I got a text
saying my car was ready.

178
00:07:40,242 --> 00:07:41,765
I didn't text you.

179
00:07:41,809 --> 00:07:44,028
Uh, no.
But your new system did.

180
00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:46,030
I programmed it so when
a customer's car is ready,

181
00:07:46,074 --> 00:07:47,336
they get a notification.

182
00:07:47,379 --> 00:07:49,425
I didn't ask you to do all that.

183
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,732
I'm not sure I'm
comfortable with my shop

184
00:07:51,775 --> 00:07:54,256
making its own
booty calls.

185
00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:56,998
Dad, trust me.
This is gonna make your business

186
00:07:57,041 --> 00:08:00,088
more efficient. See, customers
will be automatically billed,

187
00:08:00,131 --> 00:08:01,829
the payments go directly
into your account,

188
00:08:01,872 --> 00:08:04,222
and you don't have to call them
when their car is ready.

189
00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:06,834
Wait a minute.
So I get my money faster?

190
00:08:06,877 --> 00:08:10,228
And I don't have to talk
to chatterboxes like Roy?

191
00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:12,404
Hey.

192
00:08:12,448 --> 00:08:15,712
Roy, please.
I know more about your prostate

193
00:08:15,756 --> 00:08:18,149
than the doctor
who gave you the exam.

194
00:08:22,763 --> 00:08:24,199
So what
do you say, Dad?

195
00:08:24,242 --> 00:08:26,070
You want to give it
a shot?

196
00:08:26,114 --> 00:08:27,289
Why not?

197
00:08:27,332 --> 00:08:28,856
All right, great!
You'll see.

198
00:08:28,899 --> 00:08:30,248
This is gonna
make you leaner,

199
00:08:30,292 --> 00:08:32,773
meaner and rolling
in the greener.

200
00:08:32,816 --> 00:08:34,296
[chuckles]

201
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:37,517
Boy, you may be smart, but
you couldn't wrap a burrito.

202
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:44,480
Thanks for letting me have
screen time again today, Dad.

203
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,004
I don't know,
maybe spaghetti?

204
00:08:47,048 --> 00:08:48,353
[car door closes, alarm chirps]

205
00:08:48,397 --> 00:08:50,573
Uh-oh. Mom.
Mom's home.

206
00:08:50,617 --> 00:08:52,575
Uh, quick, hide this.

207
00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:53,750
Okay, but you hide this.

208
00:08:56,448 --> 00:08:58,973
Hey, guys.Oh, hey, Gem.
How was the retreat?

209
00:08:59,016 --> 00:09:00,322
Did you get your binder?

210
00:09:01,366 --> 00:09:02,803
I got two!

211
00:09:02,846 --> 00:09:04,587
Oh.

212
00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:08,025
Wow. It looks like
you two are having fun.

213
00:09:08,069 --> 00:09:09,766
[chuckles]
You bet your binders we are.

214
00:09:09,810 --> 00:09:11,246
[chuckles]

215
00:09:11,289 --> 00:09:14,379
You know, I'm gonna take
this magazine to read upstairs.

216
00:09:14,423 --> 00:09:16,338
It's got something
really interesting in it.

217
00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:21,604
So, how long before you
gave him his screen back?

218
00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:23,084
Because if it was
under two hours,

219
00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:24,868
the choir teacher
owes me a hundred bucks.

220
00:09:26,304 --> 00:09:29,003
Well, I hate to disappoint you,

221
00:09:29,046 --> 00:09:31,309
but... we made it
the whole time.

222
00:09:31,353 --> 00:09:32,659
Really?

223
00:09:32,702 --> 00:09:34,225
Yup.

224
00:09:34,269 --> 00:09:35,444
And no tantrums?

225
00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:38,882
Not him. Not me.

226
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:41,711
Wow. I'm impressed.

227
00:09:41,755 --> 00:09:44,366
Well, Gem, what you have
to understand is...

228
00:09:46,368 --> 00:09:48,457
...I'm kind of a Dad-ass.

229
00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:52,287
Come on, Calvin,
what's taking so long?

230
00:09:52,330 --> 00:09:54,332
I got a text an hour ago
that said my car was ready.

231
00:09:54,376 --> 00:09:57,031
Yeah, and you texted me
a selfie.

232
00:09:57,074 --> 00:09:58,423
Everybody
just calm down.

233
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,251
I'm gonna get
to y'all in a minute.

234
00:10:00,295 --> 00:10:01,426
And you, you delete
that picture.

235
00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:02,993
I don't know you like that.

236
00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:07,432
All right. Okay,
I opened the customer profile,

237
00:10:07,476 --> 00:10:10,653
swiped to the diagnostic menu,

238
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:12,481
clicked "payment."[phone chimes]

239
00:10:12,524 --> 00:10:14,701
You just texted me
another selfie. [laughs]

240
00:10:16,093 --> 00:10:18,095
Hey, Dad.
I just got your message.

241
00:10:18,139 --> 00:10:20,445
What's the problem?I'm gonna tell you
what the problem is.

242
00:10:20,489 --> 00:10:23,361
Your stupid system got me
sending pictures to dudes!

243
00:10:23,405 --> 00:10:25,886
Okay. There's nothing wrong
with the system.

244
00:10:25,929 --> 00:10:27,888
You must've made a mistake.You know, the only mistake

245
00:10:27,931 --> 00:10:29,367
I made was letting you
come up in here

246
00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:30,499
and mess up my business.

247
00:10:30,542 --> 00:10:32,457
Dad, calm down,
man, I'll fix it.

248
00:10:32,501 --> 00:10:34,590
No. I think you've fixed enough.

249
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:35,852
I'm just trying
to help you.

250
00:10:35,896 --> 00:10:38,855
You want to help?
Get out of my shop,

251
00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:40,378
and take this thing
with you.

252
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:43,730
Fine. You don't want my help?
Stay stuck in the past.

253
00:10:43,773 --> 00:10:45,601
[chuckles] You don't even know
what you're talking about.

254
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:47,690
I'm not stuck
in the past.

255
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:49,039
All right,
y'all sit tight.

256
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:51,215
I'm gonna go in here
and check my shoebox file.

257
00:10:57,744 --> 00:10:59,876
There you go, baby.Oh, thank you.
[chuckles]

258
00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,225
Hey, I'm surprised
Marty's not here.

259
00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:02,879
He loves your waffles.

260
00:11:02,923 --> 00:11:06,187
He's not coming. He texted to
say he's too mad at your father.

261
00:11:06,230 --> 00:11:08,363
Oh. Well, that's too bad.

262
00:11:08,406 --> 00:11:09,712
He don't know what he's missing,

263
00:11:09,756 --> 00:11:12,933
but, uh, he's about to.

264
00:11:12,976 --> 00:11:15,587
Ooh. Waffles.

265
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:16,893
Hey.

266
00:11:16,937 --> 00:11:18,329
Those are my waffles.

267
00:11:18,373 --> 00:11:19,940
How could you treat
Marty like that?

268
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,724
He was just trying to help.

269
00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:24,205
Well, all he did was make
things more complicated.

270
00:11:24,248 --> 00:11:26,903
By the time I figured out
how to charge Mrs. Perkins

271
00:11:26,947 --> 00:11:29,950
for her oil change, she
was due for another one.

272
00:11:31,168 --> 00:11:33,388
Yeah, Pop, if you're
not gonna upgrade,

273
00:11:33,431 --> 00:11:35,564
how do you expect
to compete with Motor Boys?

274
00:11:35,607 --> 00:11:37,087
Well, I'm glad you asked.

275
00:11:37,131 --> 00:11:39,394
You know, I spent
all night coming up

276
00:11:39,437 --> 00:11:41,744
with a brilliant
marketing strategy

277
00:11:41,788 --> 00:11:44,965
that is gonna bring in
tons of new business.

278
00:11:45,008 --> 00:11:46,053
Holla!

279
00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:51,580
Free tune-ups?
How can we afford to do that?

280
00:11:51,623 --> 00:11:54,148
Oh, it's easy.
Just read the fine print.

281
00:11:54,191 --> 00:11:58,021
"One free tune-up
after 15 at full price.

282
00:11:58,065 --> 00:12:01,024
Offer good for one week only"?

283
00:12:02,069 --> 00:12:03,766
That's pretty slick, huh?

284
00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:05,942
[chuckles]
Believe what I tell you,

285
00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:09,859
Motor Boys is going down.

286
00:12:09,903 --> 00:12:11,861
So, that's your big plan?

287
00:12:11,905 --> 00:12:14,081
You gonna beat Motor Boys
by standing on the corner

288
00:12:14,124 --> 00:12:15,430
and spinning that sign?

289
00:12:15,473 --> 00:12:17,606
No. You are.

290
00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:23,307
[knocking on door]

291
00:12:25,919 --> 00:12:27,790
Oh, hey, Gemma.
What's up?

292
00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:31,054
Not much. Just running some
errands, doing some shopping,

293
00:12:31,098 --> 00:12:32,752
wondering if I'm a terrible mom.

294
00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:34,884
What?

295
00:12:34,928 --> 00:12:36,886
Let me ask you something.Mm-hmm?

296
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,584
Do you ever feel like Calvin's
a better parent than you?

297
00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:41,151
[laughs]

298
00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:46,548
Girl, please. Right now he has
one son that's not talking

299
00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:49,333
to him and the other that's out
working the street corner.

300
00:12:49,377 --> 00:12:52,075
Sit down. Tell me
what's going on.

301
00:12:52,119 --> 00:12:54,556
Dave decided no screens
for Grover while I was gone,

302
00:12:54,599 --> 00:12:56,166
and it went great.

303
00:12:56,210 --> 00:12:59,082
But every time I've tried,
it's been a disaster.

304
00:12:59,126 --> 00:13:00,997
Oh, no. I'm sure
it wasn't that bad.

305
00:13:01,041 --> 00:13:04,000
Last time, I was so worn out,
I told Grover

306
00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:07,134
it was daylight savings
and sent him to bed at 3:00.

307
00:13:07,177 --> 00:13:10,006
[chuckles]
Well, girl, that's nothing.

308
00:13:10,050 --> 00:13:12,400
Back when the boys were younger,
we used to play hide-and-seek.

309
00:13:12,443 --> 00:13:15,142
And the boys would search
around the house for an hour,

310
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:17,318
while I'd be napping in the car.[chuckles]

311
00:13:18,754 --> 00:13:20,277
Well, Dave doesn't
need any naps.

312
00:13:20,321 --> 00:13:22,627
Grover hasn't had a screen
in almost three days,

313
00:13:22,671 --> 00:13:24,586
and he hasn't broken a sweat.

314
00:13:24,629 --> 00:13:26,022
Three days, huh?

315
00:13:26,066 --> 00:13:28,416
Hmm. Well, then, why are

316
00:13:28,459 --> 00:13:31,114
Grover and I playing
Words with Friendsright now?

317
00:13:33,116 --> 00:13:35,075
Unbelievable.

318
00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:37,294
I know. What kind
of freaky eight-year-old

319
00:13:37,338 --> 00:13:41,081
knows the word "cacophony"?

320
00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:44,432
Hey, Calvin's Pit Stop.

321
00:13:44,475 --> 00:13:46,173
We got free tune-ups.

322
00:13:46,216 --> 00:13:47,827
Well, kind of.

323
00:13:49,263 --> 00:13:51,526
Malcolm, what the hell, man?

324
00:13:51,569 --> 00:13:53,223
You've been out here,
like, two hours

325
00:13:53,267 --> 00:13:55,835
and not a single new customer's
come into the shop.

326
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,881
How is that my fault?
Look, nobody's paying attention.

327
00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:02,015
That's 'cause you're
spinning the sign wrong.

328
00:14:02,058 --> 00:14:03,930
Look, you need to put
some stank on it.

329
00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:06,454
Pop, the sign
is not the problem.

330
00:14:06,497 --> 00:14:07,716
If you want to help
your business,

331
00:14:07,759 --> 00:14:09,283
you need to listen to Marty.

332
00:14:09,326 --> 00:14:12,199
Oh...And maybe apologize to him
while you're at it.

333
00:14:12,242 --> 00:14:16,377
He needs to be apologizing to me
for messing up my shop.

334
00:14:16,420 --> 00:14:19,510
Now give me this. Let me
show you how to do this, man.

335
00:14:19,554 --> 00:14:21,773
You got to get down with it.
See that? Look at that.

336
00:14:21,817 --> 00:14:23,253
Look at that-- spin that.
Whoo!

337
00:14:25,255 --> 00:14:26,169
Look at that. Look at that.

338
00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:27,388
For example,
see, check this out.

339
00:14:27,431 --> 00:14:29,433
[shouting]

340
00:14:32,001 --> 00:14:33,568
[exhales sharply]
Whoa! I killed it right there.

341
00:14:33,611 --> 00:14:36,049
Look at that.
Back at it, back around.

342
00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:39,052
Up, up, you flip it, then you,
like, ride it. Like that.

343
00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:40,880
Look at that.
[grunts]

344
00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:42,577
I killed that. You like that?

345
00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:43,883
Check this out
right here.

346
00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:45,101
[shouts]Oh...

347
00:14:45,145 --> 00:14:46,146
[horn honks, tires screech]

348
00:14:46,189 --> 00:14:49,236
[car crashes, alarm sounds]

349
00:14:49,279 --> 00:14:51,238
You know what? On second
thought, maybe it's a good time

350
00:14:51,281 --> 00:14:53,022
to talk to Marty.
Yeah.

351
00:14:55,590 --> 00:14:57,244
[door opens]

352
00:14:57,287 --> 00:14:58,723
Quick, Mom's home.

353
00:14:59,811 --> 00:15:01,074
Oh, what's that, bud?

354
00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:02,771
I'm the best dad of all time?

355
00:15:02,814 --> 00:15:04,251
Come here.

356
00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:09,125
Oh, hey, Gem,
I didn't see you there.

357
00:15:09,169 --> 00:15:12,128
Hmm. You probably didn't hear me
come in with all the noise.

358
00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:15,262
Some might call it a cacophony.

359
00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:18,918
I'll be upstairs.

360
00:15:21,181 --> 00:15:23,966
So, what'd you two
do while I was gone?

361
00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,446
Well, all kinds of stuff.

362
00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:29,145
We built Legos, read books,
played board games.

363
00:15:29,189 --> 00:15:30,886
Really? Which ones?

364
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:34,107
Sorry? Risk? Trouble?

365
00:15:35,282 --> 00:15:36,805
You know, all of them.

366
00:15:36,848 --> 00:15:39,242
[tablet chimes]

367
00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:40,287
What was that?

368
00:15:40,330 --> 00:15:41,592
[chuckles]

369
00:15:41,636 --> 00:15:45,335
It sounds like, uh,
my toast is ready.

370
00:15:45,379 --> 00:15:48,164
[chuckles] Ooh, I could go
for some toast right now.

371
00:15:48,208 --> 00:15:49,731
Ooh.

372
00:15:49,774 --> 00:15:53,343
Darn it. You know,
I forgot to put the bread in.

373
00:15:53,387 --> 00:15:54,649
[tablet chimes]

374
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:58,696
[gasps]

375
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:02,309
Well, look at that. Grover was
playing Wordswith Tina.

376
00:16:03,353 --> 00:16:04,659
What?

377
00:16:07,357 --> 00:16:09,403
When did he-- Huh.

378
00:16:09,446 --> 00:16:12,188
That little stinker.

379
00:16:12,232 --> 00:16:15,061
Dave, give it up.
I know you gave him screen time.

380
00:16:15,104 --> 00:16:16,410
Okay.

381
00:16:16,453 --> 00:16:18,238
You're right. Sorry.

382
00:16:18,281 --> 00:16:20,283
It's just that when you said
that I couldn't do it,

383
00:16:20,327 --> 00:16:22,111
it made me want to do it.

384
00:16:22,155 --> 00:16:25,332
And then when I was doing it,
I realized I couldn't do it.

385
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:29,727
And your solution
was to lie to me?

386
00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:32,208
You made me feel
like a terrible mom.

387
00:16:32,252 --> 00:16:34,819
You are not a terrible mom.
You're a great mom.

388
00:16:34,863 --> 00:16:36,256
Uh-- You're the best mom.

389
00:16:36,299 --> 00:16:39,215
Sometimes I wish
you were my mom.

390
00:16:39,259 --> 00:16:41,435
Well, then, why didn't
you just tell me the truth?

391
00:16:41,478 --> 00:16:44,916
Well, because I was
disappointed with myself.

392
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:49,269
And I really liked you thinking
that I was this amazing dad.

393
00:16:49,312 --> 00:16:52,620
You are an amazing dad.

394
00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:54,404
But parenting is hard.

395
00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:58,104
And us not being honest with
each other just makes it harder.

396
00:16:58,147 --> 00:17:00,541
I know. I'm sorry.

397
00:17:03,761 --> 00:17:05,850
But I think you're right.
Grover probably

398
00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:08,244
does need to spend
less time on screens.

399
00:17:08,288 --> 00:17:10,725
Well, what do you think?
Like, an hour a day?

400
00:17:10,768 --> 00:17:12,292
That sounds about right.

401
00:17:12,335 --> 00:17:14,381
GROVER:
How about two?

402
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:18,776
How about I put you
to bed at 3:00 again?

403
00:17:18,820 --> 00:17:21,431
GROVER:
I knew that wasn't
daylight savings.

404
00:17:23,346 --> 00:17:24,565
[laser sounds over headset]

405
00:17:24,608 --> 00:17:26,828
Ha, ha! Nice try, aliens.

406
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:29,352
You thought you were slick, but
there is a new Galactic Sheriff

407
00:17:29,396 --> 00:17:31,398
in town, and his name is-- Oh!

408
00:17:31,441 --> 00:17:33,574
I died.

409
00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:35,315
[knocking on door]

410
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:37,447
Who is it?

411
00:17:37,491 --> 00:17:41,886
Hey, M-Marty, look,
I came by just to, uh...

412
00:17:41,930 --> 00:17:43,410
What are you doing?

413
00:17:43,453 --> 00:17:45,064
Playing a video game.

414
00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:50,417
Really? 'Cause you look
like Ray Charles trying to ski.

415
00:17:50,460 --> 00:17:52,984
Look, I get it.
You think technology is stupid.

416
00:17:53,028 --> 00:17:54,986
But I'm kind of
in the middle of something,

417
00:17:55,030 --> 00:17:57,728
so feel free to grab
a hard candy on your way out.

418
00:18:02,646 --> 00:18:03,908
Okay.

419
00:18:05,301 --> 00:18:07,129
CALVIN:
Whoa.

420
00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:08,913
MARTY:
Dad? Is that you?

421
00:18:08,957 --> 00:18:12,787
What is all this
stupid space crap?

422
00:18:12,830 --> 00:18:14,919
It's you.

423
00:18:14,963 --> 00:18:16,486
Hey, look, son...

424
00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:18,445
Dad, if you want to talk,
you got to shoot some aliens.

425
00:18:18,488 --> 00:18:21,187
There's a button on
your right controller...

426
00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,579
Whoa, you really seem to know

427
00:18:22,623 --> 00:18:23,885
what you're doing
with that blaster.

428
00:18:23,928 --> 00:18:25,321
Of course I do.

429
00:18:25,365 --> 00:18:26,931
I'm from the streets, Marty.

430
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:29,325
So, now what?

431
00:18:29,369 --> 00:18:30,457
Well, we want to take cover

432
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,154
before more Kurblock drones
find us.

433
00:18:32,198 --> 00:18:34,374
Follow me.

434
00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:42,338
So, son, about
what happened at the shop,

435
00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:44,340
I know you were
only trying to help,

436
00:18:44,384 --> 00:18:48,344
but all your new technology
is too much change for me.

437
00:18:48,388 --> 00:18:49,911
Look out. Laser arrows!

438
00:18:49,954 --> 00:18:52,783
[laser sounds]

439
00:18:52,827 --> 00:18:55,786
Damn, these Kurblocks
don't play.

440
00:18:57,092 --> 00:18:59,355
Look, I know change
is hard for you,

441
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:01,183
but I've seen you do
it plenty of times.

442
00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:03,403
First you resist,
but once you buy in,

443
00:19:03,446 --> 00:19:05,970
you wonder what
took you so long.Like when?

444
00:19:06,014 --> 00:19:08,016
Like when you refused to
give up your flip phone.

445
00:19:08,059 --> 00:19:10,453
[chuckles]
I loved that thing.

446
00:19:10,497 --> 00:19:15,110
When you slammed it shut, people
knew you hung up on their ass.

447
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:17,373
Yeah, but when you finally
got your smartphone,

448
00:19:17,417 --> 00:19:19,593
you realized how
much better it was.

449
00:19:19,636 --> 00:19:21,377
And how about when Mom
wanted to get a new mattress

450
00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:23,118
but you didn't want
memory foam?

451
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:24,815
I didn't like the idea of my bed

452
00:19:24,859 --> 00:19:27,601
remembering what I did
in it the night before.

453
00:19:27,644 --> 00:19:30,734
Yeah, but what happened that
first night you slept on it?

454
00:19:30,778 --> 00:19:32,519
[chuckles]
It was great.

455
00:19:32,562 --> 00:19:36,523
I slept so hard my left arm
didn't wake up for a week.

456
00:19:36,566 --> 00:19:38,046
Exactly. I'm telling you,

457
00:19:38,089 --> 00:19:39,656
if you give this
new system a chance,

458
00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:41,876
you're gonna pick it up
faster than you think.

459
00:19:41,919 --> 00:19:43,312
Maybe you're right.

460
00:19:43,356 --> 00:19:47,316
I am one of the smartest people
I know.

461
00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:50,928
See? No one believes
in you more than you.

462
00:19:50,972 --> 00:19:53,409
Thanks, son. Come on.

463
00:19:53,453 --> 00:19:55,498
Bring it in.

464
00:19:58,806 --> 00:20:01,330
Oh, Dad, look out!

465
00:20:01,374 --> 00:20:03,158
[laser sounds]

466
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:04,551
Kurblock, please.

467
00:20:04,594 --> 00:20:05,465
Whoo!

468
00:20:09,382 --> 00:20:12,689
MARTY:
And that's why, in the year
3215, the Galactic Assembly

469
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:14,343
exiled the Vortulons from
the Andromeda Compact.

470
00:20:14,387 --> 00:20:17,346
Although, there were
some economic factors

471
00:20:17,390 --> 00:20:19,740
that played into...CALVIN: Marty.

472
00:20:19,783 --> 00:20:22,264
What part of "the streets"
don't you get?

473
00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:25,485
I'm just here
to blast these fools.

474
00:20:25,528 --> 00:20:27,226
DAVE:
Oh, hey, guys.

475
00:20:29,010 --> 00:20:31,491
Dave? Are you in
Marty's apartment, too?

476
00:20:31,534 --> 00:20:33,493
[chuckles]
No, I'm at Best Buy.

477
00:20:33,536 --> 00:20:36,539
Now that I'm back on screens,
I'm checking out VR headsets.

478
00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:39,194
Wait your turn, kid.

479
00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:41,544
Well, since you're here,

480
00:20:41,588 --> 00:20:43,372
you want to help us
take out some aliens?

481
00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:45,287
Actually, I came
for a new vacuum.

482
00:20:45,331 --> 00:20:47,333
What do you guys think?
Do I go modern upright

483
00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:49,248
or classic canister?

484
00:20:49,291 --> 00:20:53,208
Or, and I'm just playing
devil's advocate here, Roomba?

485
00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:56,298
Dave, watch out!
Incoming!

486
00:20:56,342 --> 00:20:57,995
I don't see anybody.

487
00:20:58,039 --> 00:20:59,388
I was talking about me.

488
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,484
Captioning sponsored by
CBS

489
00:21:08,528 --> 00:21:09,268
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org