1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,280 This programme contains very strong language 2 00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:07,480 Getting pregnant is one of those good news/bad news kind of things. 3 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:11,680 Good news when you're getting old and need an excuse for being fat... 4 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:13,080 What's it say? 5 00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:17,640 But when you're 15... Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! 6 00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:18,680 Do another one. 7 00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:20,760 I've done seven already. I'm all out of pee. 8 00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:23,240 This is the kind of thing you want to be absolutely sure about 9 00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:25,800 before you go telling anyone, don't you think? 10 00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:29,080 Do another. 11 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:32,640 It must be terrifying giving birth 12 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:34,760 and not knowing who might come out of ya. 13 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:36,760 For all you know, it could be someone like... 14 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:39,400 CRAZED LAUGHTER 15 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:39,400 ..Billy Murphy. 16 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:42,160 He was born mean - he probably came out of the womb, 17 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:45,000 bit the doctor, and then spat on his mam. 18 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,480 Open your legs there. What? 19 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:49,080 Open your legs, the small bit. 20 00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:52,640 Billy, I don't want to be playing no games, like. Relax, will ya? 21 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:54,360 I've great aim. 22 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:57,720 No sudden movements now, though. 23 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:03,600 ARGH, JESUS! 24 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:04,960 You moved. 25 00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,200 HE CONTINUES SCREAMING 26 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:07,760 Stay still this time, all right? 27 00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:11,640 Tell Mam first, she'll be cool about it. 28 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,640 You're fuckin' what?! 29 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:16,040 Please don't tell Dad yet. I can't deal with him right now. 30 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:18,760 Don't tell me what? 31 00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:21,720 Nothing. 32 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,000 Something to do with periods, is it? 33 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:29,040 Yeah. 34 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:30,760 I'm getting good at this. 35 00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:33,920 We're going out. What? Wait... 36 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:37,240 You've been hanging out with Linda for over a month now. 37 00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:40,040 You need to shift her and get it over with. I know. I've been trying. 38 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,560 Hey, look, a dog taking a shit. 39 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:48,720 I know, Siobhan said Linda's getting tired of waiting, 40 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,440 and if you don't shift her today, she's going to shift someone else. 41 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,720 Look, we're taking them to the cinema. 42 00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:00,080 That's the perfect place to slip her the tongue. 43 00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:03,640 She likes you, there's nothing to be nervous about. 44 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,720 Thanks. 45 00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:10,960 I'll go get the drink. I'll see you in the bus, yeah? Yeah. 46 00:02:21,560 --> 00:02:22,960 Conor, where are you? 47 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,000 Waiting to get on the bus. Why? 48 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,520 You're after taking me phone. 49 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:27,840 Are you sure? 50 00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:29,920 It's my phone that's in your hands, you dickhead. 51 00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:31,160 I'm calling you from Tony's. 52 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:38,120 What bus stop are you at? 53 00:02:41,440 --> 00:02:43,000 How's it going? 54 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:01,120 BOTTLES CLINK 55 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,080 Wait a minute. 56 00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:11,320 You're that fake-faced fucker. 57 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:13,960 The name's Fake Billy, ya fatty-face fuck! 58 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:17,760 Are we going left or right? Left, right, left, right? Go right. 59 00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:18,840 Wah! 60 00:03:21,640 --> 00:03:22,920 Stop him! 61 00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:37,560 Eh! 62 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:40,000 Did you see a fella going past here with a mask, like? 63 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:43,840 He had the head off you, actually. 64 00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:45,520 Nah. 65 00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,080 Fuck's sake. 66 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:19,360 Throw it. Use both hands. 67 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:21,160 Just throw the fuckin' thing! 68 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:31,240 Do you want a 99? 69 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,600 You know what, yeah, I'd love one. 70 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:38,400 See if they've got any of that strawberry shit they put on top. 71 00:04:57,840 --> 00:04:59,480 I hate getting the bus. 72 00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:02,440 You never know what lunatic might get on. 73 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:19,560 I'm on the top deck. Bus is about to leave. Are you coming or what? 74 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:22,160 We're nearly there. Just tell the driver hang on. 75 00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:25,080 Hurry up! I can't. I'm fucking pregnant. 76 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:31,000 Siobhan says she has big news. 77 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,960 I think she might have got some hash. 78 00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:35,960 Class. Let's hope she doesn't miss the bus so. 79 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:39,520 Hey, ticket! 80 00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:41,600 Two secs. I'm just lookin' for someone. 81 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,400 Well, I need to go, so either pay for a ticket 82 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:46,560 or get off the bus, right? 83 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:54,760 WHISPERS: Shit! 84 00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:56,560 What's going on? 85 00:05:56,560 --> 00:05:58,920 I'm looking for the owner of this mask. 86 00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:04,720 Could whoever it is please step forward? 87 00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:05,760 Bollocks! 88 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:07,880 Hurry up! 89 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:10,880 I saw ya getting on wearing a grey hoodie. 90 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:17,120 I just want to talk to ya about a possible...copyright infringement. 91 00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:28,880 He's got a knife. 92 00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:33,720 I just realised, I'm on the wrong bus. 93 00:06:33,720 --> 00:06:35,480 Sit down a minute there a minute. 94 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:36,760 This? 95 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:38,280 PANICKED SCREAMING 96 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:40,360 I'm not going to stab anybody! 97 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:43,920 This is just for throwing at me friends. 98 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:47,280 I'm not finished talking. Look, could you shut that door? 99 00:06:47,280 --> 00:06:49,720 Please, everyone, just do as he says. 100 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:53,640 Look, will you get back in your seat? I'm not getting a ticket. 101 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:57,640 I just want to find the owner of this mask and then I'm getting off. 102 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:05,000 Siobhan! Linda! 103 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,040 Bollocks. 104 00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:08,080 Can we get two child tickets, there, please? 105 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:14,760 Get off the bus. But our friends are upstairs. 106 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:17,640 I don't care, get off the fucking bus! 107 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:20,160 What's got up your hole? We're staying on. 108 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,280 Here, there's a lunatic on the bus with a knife! 109 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:29,960 Can you move? We're going up to the top deck. 110 00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:31,880 No-one's going upstairs. Sit down. 111 00:07:31,880 --> 00:07:34,840 What's with everyone today? Get out my fucking way, will ya? 112 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,320 There's no need to be so rude. 113 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:38,320 I didn't fucking curse at you, did I? 114 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:53,320 It's not what you think! We're only talking! 115 00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,680 Put that knife down and put your hands in the air. 116 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,040 Close the door! 117 00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:00,520 Close the door! 118 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:02,480 Close the fuckin' door! 119 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:04,320 DOOR CLOSES 120 00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:06,320 Drive! Where to? 121 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,080 Just the next stop, thanks. 122 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:12,400 Hey! Open the door, hey! 123 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,520 Hey! Open the door. 124 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:16,560 Stop the bus, hey! 125 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,440 Fuck. 126 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,360 Get in! 127 00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:27,760 Conor and Jock are on that bus. I know! Come on! Move! 128 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,200 Calling all units, this is Sergeant Healey. 129 00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,360 We've got a problem on the number 208 bus route, 130 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:34,880 requesting backup immediately. 131 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,120 This wasn't supposed to happen. 132 00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:38,960 I know it wasn't fuckin' supposed to happen. 133 00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:40,600 It wasn't supposed to fuckin' happen. 134 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,720 HE CARRIES ON TALKING TO HIMSELF 135 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:44,080 Are you OK? 136 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:48,200 Er...yeah. Are you OK? 137 00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:49,560 Yeah, I'm fine. 138 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,840 Glad you're OK. 139 00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:05,520 Thanks. 140 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:13,400 Fuck. I'm OK, I'm OK. 141 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:18,440 We're the reason he's on this bus, we should be the ones 142 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:19,960 to get him off. Wait! 143 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:22,600 I don't like talking to crazy people who have knives. 144 00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:26,880 It'll be grand. He thinks we're his friends. 145 00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:30,560 He's mugged me around 50 times. 146 00:09:30,560 --> 00:09:33,240 Mugging people is just Billy's way of saying hello. 147 00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:39,200 All right, lads? What's the story? How you doing? 148 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:41,360 Fuckin' hell, am I glad to see you. 149 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,080 Where did you come from? 150 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,120 Ah, we were just drinking upstairs. 151 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,240 Oh, right. How are you getting on, anyway? 152 00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:51,360 Not great, to be honest. I think I'm going to have to kidnap 153 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:52,520 a busload of people. 154 00:09:54,560 --> 00:09:57,320 And all I wanted to do was find out who owned this mask. 155 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:01,520 He's the reason I got locked up for six months. 156 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,320 Shit. Fuck. 157 00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:05,840 He was wearing a grey hoodie. 158 00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:20,080 Me? 159 00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:21,640 Is that a joke, Billy? 160 00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:23,840 Everyone knows whoever owns that mask wears it 161 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,520 because they've got a melted face. 162 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,080 A melted face? 163 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:28,920 Yeah. 164 00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:30,200 Acid. 165 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,160 Aye, his eye is droopy and everything. 166 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:36,880 Do I look like I've got a melted face? 167 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:42,840 No. Does anyone else in the bus look like they've got a melted face? 168 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,360 Does anyone here got a melted face? 169 00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:52,320 No! No, sir! No! No! 170 00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:55,200 I'm looking for the owner of a melted face. 171 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,800 Could you look at the person sitting next to you 172 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,800 and see if they have a melted face? And, if they do... 173 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:02,280 ..put up your hand. 174 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:12,120 See. The reality is, whoever owns that mask is long gone. 175 00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:14,320 They probably jumped out the emergency exit along with 176 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,800 20 other passengers who done the same thing when they seen you 177 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:18,280 with a fucking knife. 178 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,800 Yeah. 179 00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:25,280 CAR HORN BEEPS 180 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:27,760 Ah, shit! 181 00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,520 SCREAMING 182 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,760 Fuck! 183 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:43,440 PHONE RINGS 184 00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:47,960 Gimme that. 185 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:53,200 You have a Guardi's number on your phone? 186 00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:55,880 Erm... He's kind of seeing me mam. 187 00:11:57,680 --> 00:12:00,000 Your mam is riding a Guardi? 188 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,080 Fuck, no! They're too old for that. 189 00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:04,160 They just watch telly together. 190 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:13,480 HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: Hello? 191 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:14,680 Is anyone hurt? 192 00:12:14,680 --> 00:12:18,240 No. Everybody's OK. There's just been a bit of misunderstanding, 193 00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,560 that's all. Thank you very much! 194 00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:22,480 Is that Billy Murphy? 195 00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:24,720 Who? 196 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,440 Billy Murphy? Who's he? 197 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:30,320 Look, Billy, what do you want? 198 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,440 How can we get everyone safely off the bus? 199 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:34,480 I don't want anything. 200 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:37,800 Why, we're all just going on a nice trip together, OK? 201 00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,400 Thank you. 202 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,000 Fuck! 203 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,960 Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! 204 00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,800 BELL RINGS IN TIME WITH HIS SWEARING 205 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,440 I see you're pulling in. Are you giving yourself up? 206 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:51,720 Fuck! Fuck! What are you doing?! 207 00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,360 Someone's ringing the bell. 208 00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:54,960 Who's ringing the bell?! 209 00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:59,240 Could people stop ringing the fucking bell?! 210 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,600 Thank you! 211 00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,680 Get out of my fucking way. 212 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,200 Drive, drive, drive! Where to? 213 00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:12,240 I don't care! Just keep fucking going! 214 00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:15,960 Ah, for fuck's sake! 215 00:13:15,960 --> 00:13:17,720 It wasn't even full! 216 00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:24,240 SIRENS BLARE 217 00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:25,720 TV REPORTER: Breaking news. 218 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,440 The number 208 bus has been highjacked just past the roundabout 219 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:30,840 on the way out of Cork City. 220 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,640 We will bring you more as the story unfolds. 221 00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:41,240 What's your plan, Billy? 222 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:44,440 I don't know. I've never done this before. 223 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:47,680 Well, you need to start negotiating. That's what they do in the films. 224 00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:50,400 If you don't, they'll try to take you out with snipers. 225 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:51,880 What? 226 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:00,320 PHONE RINGS 227 00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:06,040 Pick up and tell him what you want. OK. 228 00:14:12,360 --> 00:14:14,280 LOW-PITCHED VOICE: Hello? 229 00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:16,840 Billy, I'm unarmed. Would it be OK for me to get on the bus 230 00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:18,600 just to see if everyone's OK? 231 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,800 No. Billy isn't here. 232 00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:22,920 And if you start doing that... 233 00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:26,800 I'LL START THROWING DEAD BODIES OFF THE FUCKING BUS, YOU CUNT! 234 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:30,160 PANICKED SCREAMING 235 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:33,120 How was that? Was that OK, was it? 236 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:34,960 What the fuck are you doing? 237 00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:37,320 You told me to negotiate. 238 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:40,200 I meant, like, ask for a pizza or something. 239 00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:43,360 That's not a bad idea. I'm actually starving. 240 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:46,120 Pizza sounds good, yeah. Delicious. 241 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:52,800 I was only messing about the dead bodies. 242 00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:56,880 Look, I'll put the knife away if it makes you more comfortable. 243 00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,760 HE WINCES 244 00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:04,520 Look, if I order some pizzas, will you all have some? 245 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:08,920 You don't have to have it now if you're not hungry. 246 00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,800 You can bring it home for your supper. 247 00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:14,200 It's going to be free! 248 00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:16,320 ALL SPEAK AT ONCE 249 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:19,840 I'll have a 16" pepperoni, and a carton of wedges. 250 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:22,880 Would you like anything to drink? Bottle of Coke. 251 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:26,320 Will I get pepperoni for everyone, or do we have any vegetarians? 252 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,480 There's always one! 253 00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:33,920 So one vegetarian, a rakeload of wedges, 254 00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:36,440 ten Cokes, and ten Club Orange? 255 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:38,040 Can I have a Tanora? 256 00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,800 Sure. 257 00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,080 And I'll have a bottle of milk. 258 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:44,600 Is everybody OK with that now? 259 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,360 Yeah, yeah. Thanks! 260 00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,680 Thanks, Billy. 261 00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,880 Sh! Don't say me name! 262 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,040 Shit! Sorry, Billy. 263 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:54,880 DEEP VOICE: Have you got a pen? 264 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:57,440 The hijacker has put in his first set of demands - 265 00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,880 a large quantity of refreshments and a bottle of milk. 266 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,440 This may mean there is an infant on board. 267 00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:11,880 Thank Christ they're OK. 268 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:14,840 If I'm feeling like this out here, 269 00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:18,240 I can't imagine how terrifying it must be for them on that bus. 270 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:20,280 Alcopops, anyone? 271 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,160 ALL CHEER 272 00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:28,520 Do you get to wear tracksuits in the prison? 273 00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:31,360 Yeah, you can kind of wear what you want. 274 00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:33,400 That one's open a bit. There you go. 275 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,040 You should tell him. 276 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:44,680 Here? On the bus? 277 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:47,320 It's too fucking weird. 278 00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:48,520 You're both 15. 279 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:51,480 It's going to be fucking weird no matter where you tell him. 280 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:55,960 Two seconds, actually. I think Siobhan might have some hash. 281 00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:01,280 Do you have some of that hash? I'd love a smoke. 282 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:03,920 Did somebody say hash? 283 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,800 I don't have hash. 284 00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:08,480 Why would you say she has hash if she don't have hash? 285 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,160 I thought she had hash. Why'd you think I have hash? 286 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:12,720 You said you had big news. 287 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:17,320 Hash isn't big news, it's fucking tiny compared to other stuff. 288 00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,800 If hash is tiny news, your news must be massive! 289 00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,200 Come on, what is it? 290 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:22,560 I'm not telling you now. 291 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:23,760 BILLY GASPS 292 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:25,680 Have you got coke? That would be big news! 293 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,440 I don't have hash, and I don't have coke. 294 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,880 Well, what HAVE you got? Just drop it! 295 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:31,840 "Drop it"? 296 00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:33,360 Like pills? Have you got pills? 297 00:17:33,360 --> 00:17:36,000 No! Well, what HAVE you got? 298 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,640 Will you stop being so secretive and fucking tell him, will ya? 299 00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,160 I'm fucking pregnant, all right?! 300 00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:48,160 Holy shit! 301 00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:54,000 Congratulations! Oh, you're going to be a great dad! 302 00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,400 Congratulations! 303 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:58,560 ALL CHEER 304 00:17:58,560 --> 00:17:59,840 Whoo! 305 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:06,000 Well, that's brilliant, guys. I'm really happy for you. 306 00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:25,120 Say something. 307 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,440 How did it happen? 308 00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,240 You put your dick in my fanny. How do you think? 309 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,800 I know that, but I've done that shitloads before 310 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:36,680 and no-one's ever got pregnant. 311 00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:38,000 That's nice to know. 312 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:40,960 It was all before I met you. 313 00:18:45,360 --> 00:18:47,120 This is a good thing. 314 00:18:47,120 --> 00:18:48,480 I think. 315 00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:52,600 Isn't it? 316 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:53,880 Yeah! 317 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:56,680 Yeah! 318 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:00,720 Raspberry or strawberry, love? 319 00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:03,280 What the fuck are you doing? She's pregnant! 320 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,080 Sorry! 321 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:06,680 Jeez, she's allowed the one. 322 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:27,160 Mam's going to kill him. Dad's going to kill HER. 323 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,800 Er, two seconds there... 324 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,680 Ah, fuck. What the fuck is wrong with you? 325 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:41,160 Nothing. 326 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:43,720 Is there something wrong with me, so? Is that what it is? 327 00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:45,280 No. No, no. 328 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:47,760 You're perfect. 329 00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:50,840 Then why won't you get with me, so? 330 00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:53,280 Look, it's just I... 331 00:19:55,840 --> 00:19:58,520 I feel like you're expecting this kiss to be something special, 332 00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:01,840 and I'm pretty sure I'm going to fuck it up. 333 00:20:04,360 --> 00:20:05,880 Then why don't we just do that? 334 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:08,920 Do what? 335 00:20:08,920 --> 00:20:10,120 Fuck it up. 336 00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:13,200 What do you mean? 337 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,560 We both shift horribly, as horribly as we possibly can. 338 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:20,080 That way, every time we shift after that, it'll seem good. 339 00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:22,120 That's actually a great idea. 340 00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:23,600 All right, will you be using tongue? 341 00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,720 Tongue, teeth, everything. It's going to be awful! 342 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:27,240 OK! 343 00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:29,760 HE HOCKS UP PHLEGM 344 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,920 That's disgusting! 345 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:33,960 You said awful. 346 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,280 Fair enough. 347 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:37,280 SHE HOCKS UP PHLEGM 348 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:40,800 HE HOCKS UP PHLEGM 349 00:20:40,800 --> 00:20:43,920 SHE HOCKS UP PHLEGM 350 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,320 MUFFLED: Ready? 351 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,760 HE MOUTHS SILENTLY 352 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,600 This hijacking's taking forever. 353 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,680 Will we sing a song to pass the time? 354 00:21:46,040 --> 00:21:50,400 Sorry there, does anyone know any sing-songs? 355 00:21:52,360 --> 00:21:54,440 I'd say Conor does. Oh, does he? 356 00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:55,760 Do you know anything, fella? 357 00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:57,600 He loves that fella Westlife. 358 00:21:57,600 --> 00:21:59,680 You like a bit of Westlife? I do, I do, I do! 359 00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:02,600 I have one. 360 00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:07,160 Oh, OK, Billy. 361 00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:11,720 You should all know this one. Feel free to join in. 362 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:16,280 HE CLEARS THROAT 363 00:22:18,120 --> 00:22:21,680 # Do de do, do de do Do de do, do de do... 364 00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:25,360 TUNE: After All, By The Frank And Walters 365 00:22:25,360 --> 00:22:26,600 Come on! 366 00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:30,240 # Do de do, do de do Do de do, do de do 367 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:33,360 # Do de do, do de do, do de do Da da da da da da da 368 00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:36,680 # After all, I really love you 369 00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:40,280 # Do de do, do de do Do de do, do de do 370 00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:44,560 # After all that we've been through 371 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:47,440 # Do de do, do de do, do de do aaah 372 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:53,280 # I know that we fight, and our love gets pushed to the side 373 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,360 # Aaah 374 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:58,040 # Still it ends all right 375 00:22:58,040 --> 00:23:03,360 # After all, I really need you... # 376 00:23:03,360 --> 00:23:05,080 Is that singing? 377 00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:08,960 # I don't know how I'd live without you... # 378 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,000 I think so, yeah. 379 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,480 # Aaaaah # 380 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:18,480 # The days, they go by, and you're always there on my side... # 381 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:19,960 # Aaaaah # 382 00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:24,440 # Girl, I'm glad you're mine 383 00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:28,120 # There are times I get distracted, girl 384 00:23:28,120 --> 00:23:32,160 # By the ways and workings of this world 385 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,600 # Yet I think of you as my life's shrine 386 00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:40,440 # And I'm glad that I'm yours and you're mine 387 00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,960 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 388 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,600 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 389 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:51,680 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 390 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,760 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 391 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,240 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 392 00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:00,760 # Bah bah bah Badaba bah bah bah badaba 393 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:09,960 # That I'm yours and you're mine. # 394 00:24:12,360 --> 00:24:15,960 ALL CHEER 395 00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:25,120 Does anybody need to go toilet? 396 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,920 Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on! 397 00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:43,000 The number 8 bus is heading towards the Cork-Waterford border. 398 00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:46,680 It's only a matter of time before this hijacker runs out of road. 399 00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:49,520 Come on, we need to get ahead of the bus. 400 00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:52,040 Can we go down...? No. OK. No. This way. 401 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,720 I feel sorry for him. 402 00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:03,120 You feel sorry for Billy? 403 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:08,120 I'm not saying he's an angel, but after this 404 00:25:08,120 --> 00:25:10,840 he'll probably get life imprisonment for just being stupid. 405 00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:13,680 Round the tree... 406 00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:16,240 ..and into the hole. 407 00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:21,080 For fuck's sake! 408 00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:30,400 Look up ahead! 409 00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:33,840 GASPS AND MURMURS 410 00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:48,880 BILLY BREATHES HEAVILY 411 00:25:57,000 --> 00:25:58,640 Drive around them! 412 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,360 I can't, there's no room. 413 00:26:02,360 --> 00:26:03,600 Then reverse! 414 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:09,080 We're blocked both ways. 415 00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,160 The hijacked bus has now hit a Gardai blockade 416 00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:16,880 just on the far side of the Cork-Waterford border. 417 00:26:16,880 --> 00:26:19,080 There are no known casualties at this time. 418 00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:25,240 PHONE RINGS 419 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:31,480 Billy, you've reached your stop. It's time to get off the bus. 420 00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:34,320 HIGH VOICE: I have a return ticket, thank you very much. 421 00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,680 What am I going to do? 422 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:50,440 There's only two options, really. 423 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,080 What are they? 424 00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:56,360 Option one - give yourself up and go to prison. 425 00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:59,040 Fuck that, I'd rather die than go back there. 426 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:00,200 What's option two? 427 00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:06,360 Die. 428 00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:11,760 What's option one again? 429 00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:14,800 Not die. 430 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:25,800 We'll all tell them you were a nice kidnapper. 431 00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:28,120 MURMURS OF AGREEMENT 432 00:27:28,120 --> 00:27:30,200 Thanks very much, I appreciate that. 433 00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:34,760 Do you know what? 434 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:36,440 I really enjoyed today. 435 00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:45,040 I'll see you all in about 15 to 20 years' time, yeah? 436 00:27:47,520 --> 00:27:49,520 Take care, Billy. 437 00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:50,720 See you, Billy. 438 00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:51,840 Mind yourself. 439 00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:53,120 All the best, Billy. 440 00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:56,760 Tell your mam I was asking for her. 441 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:10,520 Fuck it. 442 00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:16,760 I think I have a third option, 443 00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:19,440 but I'm going to need everyone's help. Are you up for it? 444 00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:21,080 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, all right. 445 00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:24,240 Billy! 446 00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:44,840 PHONE RINGS 447 00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:46,320 DEEP VOICE: Can you hear me? 448 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:47,800 We hear you, Billy. 449 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:52,120 I'm going to throw out my knife, and then, if you put down your guns, 450 00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:56,480 I'll come out with my hands up. OK? No shooting, now, you promise? 451 00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:57,800 OK, we promise. 452 00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:34,000 I'm Billy Murphy! 453 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:52,920 No, I'm Billy Murphy! 454 00:30:00,320 --> 00:30:01,760 No, I'm Billy Murphy! 455 00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:07,160 I'm Billy Murphy! 456 00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:17,600 I'm Billy Murphy! 457 00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:30,480 Are you sure you saw Billy Murphy on that bus, 458 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,600 or could it have been someone else in a mask? 459 00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:42,960 I'm not going crazy, OK? I saw him here. 460 00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:44,680 So where is he, so? I don't know. 461 00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:03,880 I'm Billy Murphy. 462 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:17,600 I think even nutjobs like Billy Murphy have reasons 463 00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:19,200 for being the way they are. 464 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,720 I'm not saying all the nasty shit he does is OK, 465 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,000 but you have to wonder... 466 00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:30,640 ..if someone loved him just a little bit when he was a kid, 467 00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:32,480 would he have turned out different? 468 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:06,480 I'm so happy you're OK. I'm never going to fight with you again. 469 00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:09,160 Huh. Let's see how long that lasts. 470 00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:22,920 MAIREAD: She's pregnant?! You fucking idiot! 471 00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:24,680 MAIREAD SCREAMS 472 00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:28,520 Behind me, a mother screams for joy with the safe return of her son. 473 00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:31,560 How does it feel to have your boys back safe? 474 00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:33,120 Just wonderful. 475 00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,440 And she just found out she's going to be a granny, too. 476 00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:37,320 You're not my son. I didn't adopt you. 477 00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:41,720 Stop the car! 478 00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:43,320 Linda! 479 00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:48,480 Oh, for fuck's sake! 480 00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:52,600 Emotions are running high here after such a traumatic experience. 481 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:54,000 There goes another! 482 00:32:54,000 --> 00:33:00,720 MUSIC: After All by The Frank And Walters