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This programme contains
strong language from the start.

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No matter what grown-ups say,
being young is for dickheads

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cos you've got fuck-all
independence.

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That's why meself and Jock decided
to move out of home

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to somewhere fancier like...

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Spain. Spain?

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Spain. Like, definitely Spain?
Yeah, boy.

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It's what all Irish people do
when they become adults.

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You go abroad and make
a name for yourself.

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Bono did it. Daniel Day... Daniel
Day whatever his name is, you know?

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Oscar fella.

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Barack Obama done it.

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Barack Obama's not Irish, though.

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Course he fucking is, boy.

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O'Bama.

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Or his... Or his mam was
or something,

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but all the best people
in the world come from Ireland.

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Why are we leaving, then?

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Boy...take a look around.

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We've outgrown this place.

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Cork's got nothing left for us.

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Yeah, boy, you're right.
And Spain's way bigger than Cork.

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It's perfect, right?

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It's hot over there. Yeah.

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English is the main language. Yeah.

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And we can run a bar. All the Irish
run the bars in Spain.

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Yeah, it's just we've never actually
ran a bar though before.

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But, Con, everyone that runs a bar

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at some point didn't used to
run a bar.

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That's an excellent point.

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We send money over to Star
every week. Yeah.

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To Siobhan, Linda, everyone,

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and then invite them all over
to a mansion.

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They would be fucking so proud, boy!

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We need to make a proper, proper
adult plan. Proper, like. Proper.

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We've got to book flights.

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Yeah.

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Get sunscreen.

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Flip-flops.

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Aye, it's going to take a lot of
work, actually. Yeah.

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Wee good bit of work.

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But we can do that.
We can do it, boy.

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No problemo, Escobar.

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Escobar, Pablo Escobar.

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Yeah, I might call myself a
different name over there. Oh, yeah?

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People won't know me.
What would they call you?

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Jocke. Jocke?

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Jocke. Jocke and Conrad.

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Conrad and Jocke.

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That'd be class.
Conrad and Jocke's Pub.

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Conrad and Jocke's Pints...

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BOTH: And Shot-es.
THEY LAUGH

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Yes! Manana, manana.

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Adios, amigos. Manana.

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Adios, Cork, boy. Manana.

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You've to learn something else,
you can't just keep saying manana.

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Dos cervezas, por favor.

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Aye? Yeah, I guess.

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All right. OK, see you in a bit.

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Hey, Conor and Jock want us to come
over to their house.

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They have some surprise for us.

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Holy fucking shit!

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They've all the money
from the boxing bet!

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They're probably after buying us
something fucking amazing!

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Please be new shoes,
please be new shoes... Come on!

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No fucking way.
You're not moving to Spain.

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All right, this isn't like a thing

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that we just plucked
out of thin air.

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We've given it a lot of thought.
And we've got a plan.

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We're going to run a bar.

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In Spain.

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That's it?

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And we've made up our minds as well.
You can't talk us out of it.

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We're nearly adults now,

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so we're going to start taking
care of ourselves.

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You're not fit to take
care of yourselves. We are fit.

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I can do 20 sit-ups in one go,

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if Jock's holding my feet.

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I don't think that's what
she means, boy.

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And what happens if you two
dickheads get in trouble, then?

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How am I supposed to hop on a plane
and save the day?

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Er, who says we're going to
get in trouble?

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Conor, how many times last week
did you call me

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to dig you out of a fucking hole?

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Six. Are you including the time

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when we got caught smoking
in the swimming pool?

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About seven. Seven times.

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In one week.

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That's a return flight every day.

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How do you fucking think
I'd manage that?

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BANGING

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What's that?

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Billy!

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Yes, Mairead?

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All right, lads?

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Could you hold the banging
for two fucking seconds?

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Fix the washing machine,
don't fix the washing machine.

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You know, sometimes, Mairead,
you can be a bit fucking mental.

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I never asked you to fix the washing
machine, I just said it was broken

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and now you're hammering the shit
out of it. You're welcome.

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And before you ask,
the washing machine

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is the magic box in the corner
that cleans all your clothes.

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We're moving out, all right.
It's time.

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Adios.

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Conor, if I thought that you were
capable of all this,

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of, like, booking...

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PHONE RINGS
Sorry.

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SINGSONGY: Hello?

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Billy Murphy's phone.
Billy Murphy speaking.

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Yes.

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OK.

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Thank you for telling me.

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Billy! Jesus Christ! Billy!

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You all right? Get up.
Get up, Billy.

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Get up. You all right there?

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Oh... You OK, Billy?

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Course I am. Why wouldn't I be?

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Because of that m-massive banger
on your head.

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That's nothing and I'll use it

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to head-butt anybody
who disagrees with me, OK?

121
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Do you know what, Billy? Why don't
you just sit down for a bit?

122
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No, I'm all right, Mairead.

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It's nothing.

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I've just got somewhere
I've got to be.

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Er, just... Fucking one second.
Lads, a hand here.

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If them pricks touch me,

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I'm going to batter them into a tiny
little squishy piece of shit.

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BUZZER SOUNDS

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Er, that's the door. I'll go check
who's at the door, right?

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Never mind the fucking door.

131
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Billy, we're just trying
to help you, all right?

132
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I don't need your help.

133
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I've just got somewhere
I've got to be.

134
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Jock's right, Billy, we're just
trying to help you.

135
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Just wait a minute, all right?
Just...

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One minute for you, Mairead,

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not them pricks.

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And then I'm off.
I've just got somewhere...

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You've got to be.
I know, you keep saying it.

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BUZZER SOUNDS AGAIN
Just don't let him fucking move.

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Fuck's sake...

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What's going on, Healy?
Now is not a good time.

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♪ Do-do, do-do, do-do, do-do, do!

144
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♪ Take a parachute and jump

145
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♪ You can't stay here forever

146
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♪ When everyone else is gone

147
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♪ Being all alone
won't seem that clever

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♪ Take a parachute and go... ♪

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What the fuck?

150
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Hey, Billy?

151
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Here, look. How many fingers
am I holding up, Billy?

152
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Get those fingers out of my face

153
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or I'll snap them
off and feed them to Jock.

154
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All right, sorry, sorry!

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Fucking hell...

156
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SINGING OUTSIDE

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♪ Don't look out for you... ♪

158
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What's that...

159
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..awful old-fashioned noise?

160
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♪ I'll make it simple for you... ♪

161
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Oh, God, no!

162
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Mairead MacSweeney, would you do me
the honour...?

163
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What's going on?

164
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Can you just give me one minute,
fellas, please?

165
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Healy, now is not a good time.

166
00:06:55,640 --> 00:06:57,440
When is there going to be
a better time than

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when I'm down on one knee on your
doorstep with a barbershop quartet?

168
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:02,000
They're barbers as well?

169
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,600
Lads, could I get a quick trim
after? I'm due a haircut.

170
00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,080
Guys, could you please go
and check on Billy, now?

171
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Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah.

172
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Fuck!

173
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Go, go, go, go.

174
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Mairead MacSweeney,
would you do me the honour...?

175
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,200
Sorry, Mam...
Oh, for fuck's sake.

176
00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:21,520
Billy's gone.
What do you mean, he's gone?

177
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He's gone out the back door, like.
Oh, God!

178
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:25,160
Wait, what?

179
00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,000
Oh, shit!

180
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,120
If anything happens to Billy,
it's your fault.

181
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How is it our fault?
You two let him leave. It's on ye.

182
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Hang on, you're ignoring me
for Billy fucking Murphy?

183
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He's after hitting his head.

184
00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:43,960
Billy Murphy's always
hitting his head.

185
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,280
Oh, God.

186
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:48,960
Will you marry me, Mairead?

187
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:50,240
Jesus, Tony!

188
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,640
Right, lads, find Billy,
keep him safe.

189
00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:57,080
I'm going to get my car,
we'll get into the hospital.

190
00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:59,440
You call me when you find him,
all right? Yes, Mam.

191
00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:04,120
Just get out.

192
00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,200
Now, will you fuck off, like?
I'm busy.

193
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,440
See, this is why I love you,
Mairead, cos you're strong,

194
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,640
caring, determined, you know
exactly what you want.

195
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,680
Will you marry me? No, I won't.

196
00:08:12,680 --> 00:08:14,440
You see, this is why I hate you,
Mairead,

197
00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:18,520
because you're pig-headed,
frustrating, single-minded.

198
00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:20,160
HE SIGHS

199
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:21,200
I love you, Mairead!

200
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:25,280
Did you see what Healy was doing?

201
00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:27,000
Shut up,
I don't want to talk about it.

202
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,360
Here, wait, did you see a madman
with a big fucking banger

203
00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:31,600
on his head and a mental look
on his face around here?

204
00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:33,080
Billy Murphy went that way.

205
00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:34,120
Sound.

206
00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:37,600
Here, boy, do you know, if your mam
does marry Healy...

207
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,040
She's not going to marry Healy!

208
00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:41,520
..you're going to have to start
calling him Dad.

209
00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:43,160
Look, did you see her face,
all right?

210
00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:45,120
It wasn't exactly
the look of fucking love.

211
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,440
Yeah, boy, have you ever seen
a married couple before?

212
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,600
Marriage is a fine balance
between love and hate.

213
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:53,240
That's the whole point, I think,
otherwise it gets boring.

214
00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:56,160
Yeah, well, Mam's life isn't boring,
right, cos she's got the two of us.

215
00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:59,040
But will you think about this?
If your mam marries Healy

216
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:01,800
then she'll have someone else
to worry about other than us.

217
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,440
Then we can do whatever we want,

218
00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:04,760
like go to Spain.

219
00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:12,760
There's Billy. Come on.

220
00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:24,400
♪ If the wind don't catch you,
I will

221
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:25,440
♪ I will... ♪

222
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,080
Are you not picking up on
the fucking vibe here, lads?

223
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:30,400
We need to talk, Mairead. Not now.

224
00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:32,120
All right, I'm coming with you.

225
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,200
Billy!
What do you two pricks want?

226
00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,200
Here, we need to get your head
looked at.

227
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:49,200
You two need to get YOUR fucking
heads looked at.

228
00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,120
I've just got somewhere
I've got to be.

229
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:52,760
Yeah? Well, we need
to get you sorted

230
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:54,800
because there's somewhere
we've got to be too.

231
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,440
Where the fuck have you got to be?

232
00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:57,680
Spain.

233
00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:01,080
Spain? In...Spain?

234
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:04,240
Yes, Spain in Spain, where else?

235
00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:07,680
What with global warming, you two
would be fried like a fucking crisp.

236
00:10:07,680 --> 00:10:09,440
Have you never heard
of sun cream, Billy?

237
00:10:09,440 --> 00:10:13,160
Yeah, and you're going to put that
all over your pale, puny bodies

238
00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:15,280
four times a day?

239
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:17,160
You don't need to do that here.

240
00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:19,320
All right, well, while you tell us
how wrong we are,

241
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:22,000
why don't we get that banger on your
head looked at by a doctor?

242
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:24,400
You're not going to stop me again.

243
00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:28,400
And if ye try to stop me again,
I'm going to batter ye.

244
00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:31,640
Do ye understand? Yeah. Yeah.

245
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,560
What now?

246
00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:42,280
It's either getting a beating
off Billy or a bollocking off Mam.

247
00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:51,840
Mairead.

248
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,040
Seat belt.

249
00:10:58,040 --> 00:10:59,840
I'm just looking after you.

250
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:02,200
All right, that's what I do.

251
00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:05,360
And that's what I want to do for
the rest of our lives because...

252
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:07,720
..I love you.

253
00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:12,720
And what about you being needy or
controlling

254
00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:14,960
or a fucking pig when we
lived together?

255
00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:18,240
Oh, well, that's really nice.

256
00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:20,680
Yeah, remind me to never ask you
for a reference.

257
00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:30,720
There's something really unnatural
about walking towards Billy Murphy.

258
00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,280
It goes against every instinct.

259
00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:35,320
Normally, everyone is running in
the opposite direction to him.

260
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,440
Billy did say he didn't want us
following him again.

261
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:39,960
He's just saying that, Conor,
trust me. Here, Billy, Billy!

262
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,240
Billy, Billy!
Just wait there, boy.

263
00:11:42,240 --> 00:11:44,880
All right, I know you said for us
not to come and talk to you but...

264
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:46,160
Oh!

265
00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:47,400
I warned ye!

266
00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:49,920
JOCK AND CONOR GASP AND COUGH

267
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,560
Would you stop ringing the doorbell?

268
00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:04,640
If they were in,
they would have answered by now.

269
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:07,280
You don't have to ring 78 times.

270
00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:08,520
PHONE VIBRATES

271
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:12,000
Oh... Ugh...

272
00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,360
Linda, we're a little busy
at the moment.

273
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,880
Can we call you back in a bit?

274
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,360
No, you can't ring us back.

275
00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:19,960
Where's our big surprise?

276
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:22,560
Tell Jock I want my big surprise!

277
00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:25,000
I think Billy's going
to the shopping centre.

278
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,240
How about we meet you
at the shopping centre and, yeah,

279
00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:28,440
we'll talk then?

280
00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:31,880
Whatever they've got us
must be massive

281
00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:35,280
cos they can't even bring it outside
the shopping centre. I know!

282
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:41,360
What now? We call Mam. Sure,
she'll know how to handle Billy.

283
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:43,800
Conor, we're trying to prove to Mam
that we're independent.

284
00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:46,600
When we get to Spain, we can't just
phone her any time we've a problem.

285
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:49,320
Yes, we can.
They have phones in Spain as well.

286
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:51,480
Yeah, I know that.

287
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:54,640
Sure, I don't fucking care,
I'm calling her, all right? Come on.

288
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,240
PHONE RINGS
Don't answer that.

289
00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:00,480
It's Conor, I have to.
Don't answer that, Mairead,

290
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:02,880
it's illegal to use your phone
while you're driving.

291
00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:04,760
If you answer that,
I will arrest you.

292
00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:08,120
Thanks, you've just given me another
good reason not to marry you.

293
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,160
Better?

294
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:11,520
Where are you?

295
00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:17,080
Billy? Oh, Jesus.

296
00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:18,720
Whoa, whoa, whoa... What?

297
00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:20,480
Look.

298
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:23,080
Ah... Ah, Jeez...

299
00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:26,800
Oh, he's definitely acting stranger
than normal,

300
00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:28,200
even for Billy.

301
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,800
Even Billy's not normally
that mental.

302
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:32,600
All right, come on.

303
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:35,960
How's it going, Billy?

304
00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:38,440
We just want to see
if you're all right.

305
00:13:38,440 --> 00:13:39,760
I'm fine, lads.

306
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:42,600
It's just... What?

307
00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:44,920
Nothing, nothing.

308
00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:47,080
Do you remember what happened
at the house, Billy?

309
00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:48,560
Of course I fucking do.

310
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:51,280
I got a phone call
and then I left the house.

311
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:52,720
No, you fainted.

312
00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:54,080
Did I?

313
00:13:54,080 --> 00:13:55,400
I don't think I did.

314
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,360
Did I?

315
00:13:57,360 --> 00:13:58,720
Who was on the phone, Billy?

316
00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:00,560
I don't know who it was.

317
00:14:00,560 --> 00:14:02,440
Why did you faint, then?

318
00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:04,320
I think it was something
they told me.

319
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,800
Now, why don't you two fucking
leave before I hurt you again?

320
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,600
Because I've just got somewhere
I've got to be.

321
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:14,760
What the fuck's he on about?
I don't have a fucking clue.

322
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,360
But, look, he can't go anywhere
on the escalator. He's safe.

323
00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:20,080
We just have to wait for your mam
to arrive and, in the meantime,

324
00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:22,840
I'll find the girls and talk to
them about Spain, OK? Go on.

325
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:29,760
I'm not taking no
for an answer, Mairead.

326
00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:32,120
But it's the only answer you're
going to get, like.

327
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:33,440
Where the fuck are the boys?

328
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:38,160
Sorry, girls.

329
00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,560
Where is it, then? Where's what?

330
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,640
Oh, you're very funny.
THEY GIGGLE

331
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:45,080
Where's our big surprise?

332
00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:46,280
We're going to Spain.

333
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,800
BOTH: Yeah!

334
00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:53,080
Oh, no, no, no! Here, here...

335
00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:55,680
Wait, wait, no, no, no,
is that why you brought us here,

336
00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:57,560
so you could book our tickets?

337
00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,480
No, you're mis...

338
00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:00,840
You're misunderstanding me.

339
00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:05,240
WE are going to Spain, like,
by ourselves, me and Con.

340
00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:06,560
What?

341
00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:07,920
We're doing it for you.

342
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:13,720
Wait...you and Conor are going to
Spain? Yeah.

343
00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,680
By yourselves?

344
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:19,080
For us? Yeah, we're going to go over
there, set up a bar and,

345
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:21,520
after a couple of months,
once everything's running,

346
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:25,880
we're going to fly you two over
to join us. What the fuck?

347
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:29,240
And you idiots expected us to be
happy about that?

348
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:31,080
Yeah! Are you not?

349
00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:33,040
No, we're fucking not.

350
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,440
What about Star?

351
00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:36,800
Just throw factor 50 block on her
and she'll be grand.

352
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:40,200
Star can't go to Spain. She'll grow
up learning a different language.

353
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:43,080
We won't be able to understand
our own baby.

354
00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:44,120
Well...

355
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:48,160
PHONE VIBRATES

356
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,200
I'm standing at the escalator,
staring at Billy.

357
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,680
Now where the fuck are you?

358
00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:00,920
Back staircase.

359
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:02,000
I'm going up.

360
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,040
Hurry up, will ye?

361
00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:07,120
PHONE CHIMES

362
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:10,320
Oh, shit.

363
00:16:10,320 --> 00:16:12,960
Erm... Here, sorry, girls,
I-I got to go.

364
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,120
Come here, just think this over and
you'll realise

365
00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:17,000
it's actually for the best, yeah?
Love you!

366
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,160
All right, bye! Jock!

367
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:21,760
Jock, I'll fucking kill ye.
Get back here right now!

368
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:24,720
You OK, Billy?

369
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,480
That lump seems to be affecting
your sense of direction.

370
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,760
Do you want to come down off
the escalator

371
00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:30,960
so I can take a look at it?

372
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:34,800
That's very kind of you. I've just
got somewhere I've got to be.

373
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,680
Where were ye?! We had to talk
to the girls about Spain.

374
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:40,160
Do you ever think about anybody
except your fucking selves?

375
00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:41,560
HEALY: It's all right, Mairead,

376
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:43,840
there's a button here
that stops the... No! No!

377
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,320
ALARM SOUNDS

378
00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:53,360
I'm after telling ye 100 times, I've
just got somewhere I've got to be.

379
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:56,680
And you're not going
to fucking stop me!

380
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,440
Come on, Billy. It's over.
Give yourself up.

381
00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:01,600
Healy, what the fuck?

382
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,640
Sorry. Old habits.

383
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:06,800
Look, we just want to get
you into the car

384
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:09,040
and go to the hospital, all right?

385
00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:12,440
Yeah, Billy?
Billy, you're trapped, OK?

386
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,760
J-Just let us help you.

387
00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:18,120
I once cornered a rat
because somebody told me

388
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:21,360
if you corner a rat
it will jump up and attack you.

389
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:24,280
And I wanted to know
if that was true.

390
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,760
And...?

391
00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:30,680
BILLY SCREAMS

392
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,560
What the fuck were you thinking
leaving Billy on his own like that?

393
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,440
He wasn't going anywhere!

394
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:42,600
He was like a little hamster
on a wheel.

395
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,480
You were supposed
to be taking care of him.

396
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,480
WHISPERS: This is our chance to be
responsible.

397
00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:47,880
Look, don't worry, we've got it.

398
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:51,320
You go to the car and we'll call you
once we find him, all right?

399
00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:00,960
There he is, there he is.

400
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,080
Come on, let's get him. No, no, no.
What the fuck?

401
00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:08,480
We don't need to get him,
we just need to keep an eye on him

402
00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,400
until Mam catches up
with us in the car.

403
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:13,440
Oh, good thinking.

404
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:15,920
That way he can't give us a beating
and she can't be mad.

405
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:20,120
It's win-win. Smart boy.
Right. I'll text Mam.

406
00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:21,480
SOBBING

407
00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:23,640
BOTH: And... And they said
they were going to...

408
00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:24,920
One at a time, girls.

409
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:27,800
I can't work out what you're saying
with all the snot and wailing.

410
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,320
The boys are leaving!

411
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:31,120
And they're moving to Spain.

412
00:18:31,120 --> 00:18:33,520
Spain?

413
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:35,480
N-No, that's awful.

414
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:38,600
You have to help us persuade them
not to leave.

415
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:40,000
Well, is that wise?

416
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:44,120
I mean, travel broadens the horizons
of the mind and...

417
00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:45,720
Girls, where are ye?

418
00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:48,080
Blackpool Shopping Centre.

419
00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:49,960
Go!

420
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:51,760
What are you smiling about?

421
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,280
I'm not smiling.

422
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:55,000
I just had the sun in my eyes.

423
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,520
Get in the car, Barry, come on.

424
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:08,400
COWS MOOING

425
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,360
Oh, God!

426
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:13,040
Are you sure this is the right way,
just waiting here?

427
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:17,000
Conor texted to say Billy is
heading out of town,

428
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:18,680
so, yes, I'm sure.

429
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:21,480
Let me see the text, maybe.

430
00:19:21,480 --> 00:19:25,920
Jesus, Healy, can you stop meddling
for once in your life?

431
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:27,880
You always have to be in control,
don't you?

432
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,040
If you hadn't pressed the
emergency stop button,

433
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:32,600
we wouldn't be standing here
right now like a pair of pricks.

434
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:35,000
When will you see that I'm
just trying to look after you?

435
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,800
Tony, you're a man-child.
I'm the one who looks after you.

436
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:41,680
Thanks very much, but I already have
two hapless children to look after.

437
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:42,800
I'm at capacity.

438
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,320
I can't believe I'm saying this,

439
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,040
but judging by how
they acted in the shopping centre

440
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,800
and the way they've been watching
over Billy all day,

441
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,600
those boys might be getting
to the age

442
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:54,480
where they're ready
to leave the nest.

443
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:55,520
PHONE CHIMES

444
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,040
They're in the middle
of a cabbage field.

445
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:07,360
♪ Take a parachute and jump

446
00:20:07,360 --> 00:20:10,280
♪ You can't stay here forever

447
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:13,320
♪ When everyone else is gone

448
00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:16,080
♪ Being all alone won't
seem that clever

449
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:19,360
♪ Take a parachute and go

450
00:20:19,360 --> 00:20:22,560
♪ There's going to have
to be some danger

451
00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:25,080
♪ Take a parachute and jump

452
00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:28,120
♪ You're going to have
to take flight... ♪

453
00:20:28,120 --> 00:20:29,480
Know what, boy?

454
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:31,040
I think I'm becoming an adult.

455
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,400
I just realised I'm actually really
enjoying

456
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:34,920
this walk in the countryside.

457
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:37,480
Do you know, I was just thinking
the exact same thing.

458
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:41,560
Look at us - two young adults
just enjoying the countryside.

459
00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:43,360
Fucking yeah, boy.

460
00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:44,680
Farmers.

461
00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:50,160
Oh...

462
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:55,520
What? What's wrong with you?
It's just...

463
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:58,000
Look, we will be OK in Spain,
won't we? Of course, boy.

464
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:00,000
It's going to be amazing.

465
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:03,600
Maybe our milk-bottle bodies won't
be able to handle the Spanish sun.

466
00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:06,240
Not at all, boy.

467
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:16,280
No, no, once we burn off a couple of
layers, we'll build up a tolerance.

468
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:17,720
Like drinking? Exactly.

469
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:19,600
And, sure the girls will come round

470
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:22,200
once they realise they're 100%
totally wrong.

471
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:25,280
Be grand, boy, don't worry.
Be grand.

472
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:27,000
Sure, you're right.

473
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,440
There's a bus stop here,
for Christ's sake.

474
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,720
We could have all just gotten
the fucking bus.

475
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:35,640
I don't think Billy likes to get the
bus any more

476
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:37,440
after you know what. Aye.

477
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:38,880
I just got a message from Conor.

478
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:40,480
They're at Crosshaven Rugby Club.

479
00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:42,960
What the hell are they doing
all the way out there?

480
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:49,360
Fucking knackered, boy.
How much further is he going to go?

481
00:21:49,360 --> 00:21:50,440
I know, we need to stop

482
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,160
before the soles of my trainers
are fully worn through.

483
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,360
Wait, wait.

484
00:21:57,360 --> 00:21:58,960
I have a plan.

485
00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:03,560
Hey, Billy!

486
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:05,480
Hey, big Billy!

487
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,120
How's it going, Billy?
What are you doing around here?

488
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:12,880
We're just going for a walk
in the countryside.

489
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:16,120
Don't know about you, but we've been
walking for fucking miles.

490
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,040
Yeah, I have too.

491
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:19,720
Anyway, I'll see you later.

492
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:23,320
And we're just going in there
for a quick glass of water.

493
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:30,800
Yeah? Yeah, we're very, very thirsty
after all that walking.

494
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:33,400
And apparently, apparently
this place

495
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:36,000
has the tastiest water
in all the area.

496
00:22:36,000 --> 00:22:38,200
Anyway, see you later, Billy.

497
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,240
Yeah, I could do with a nice glass
of tasty water.

498
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:43,400
Ah, no, we don't want to keep you.

499
00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:46,520
And there might not be enough
tasty water to go around, so...

500
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:48,560
Here, if I want some
nice, tasty water,

501
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,320
I'm going to get some, all right?

502
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,840
Here, get away from
that nice, tasty water.

503
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:57,080
It's mine!

504
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:58,240
Shut the door!

505
00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:00,360
Ah! Ah-ha-ha!

506
00:23:00,360 --> 00:23:02,200
Thank fuck!

507
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:03,560
Conor, you fucking did it!

508
00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:06,760
Fuck yes!

509
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:08,480
That took so fucking long.

510
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:12,040
What do we do now?

511
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,320
I've heard of the calm before the
storm, but in this case,

512
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:24,200
Billy Murphy is the storm and he's
being calm,

513
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:25,720
which is far more unsettling.

514
00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:28,640
Well? Nothing, just silence.

515
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:33,560
This is the scariest Billy's
ever been.

516
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,600
I have an idea.

517
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:37,640
Oh, here we go again,
Captain Control.

518
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,600
Actually, I was going to say
you should go in, Mairead.

519
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,560
You'll handle it better than I will.

520
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:44,640
Oh.

521
00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:47,440
Yeah, Healy's right, but me
and Jock are going with you.

522
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,880
Erm...Billy?

523
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:05,640
We're coming in.

524
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:06,920
We mean no harm.

525
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:11,840
You OK, Billy?

526
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:16,080
Hi, Mairead. How's it going, lads?

527
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:21,680
You tricked me good with that
tasty water bullshit.

528
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:25,720
I was going to kick the shit
out of you, but I thought about it.

529
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:30,080
I thought, if these two little
pricks are following me around,

530
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,040
they must be keeping an eye on me.

531
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:36,040
So I let you live.

532
00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:41,560
Billy, that's a massive lump
on your head.

533
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:43,720
Honestly, Mairead, I'm fine.

534
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:45,760
There's nothing wrong with my head.

535
00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:51,160
Then what's wrong, like?
Why did you faint back at the house?

536
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:55,440
Did I ever tell ye the funny
story about when I was a kid?

537
00:24:57,360 --> 00:25:00,040
Right, I'd gotten into some trouble
with my mam.

538
00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:04,960
She sent me to my room and,
in protest, I said to her,

539
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:10,000
"I'm going to hold my breath now,
Mam, until you forgive me."

540
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:11,240
And then I fainted.

541
00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:16,880
When I woke up,
she hadn't even noticed!

542
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:18,720
HE LAUGHS

543
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:22,520
Do you get it?

544
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:24,240
That's fucking funny, like.

545
00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:30,480
I said, fucking funny, eh?

546
00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:32,600
FORCED LAUGHTER

547
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:42,920
Just trust me, all right?

548
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,680
I've had far worse bumps
on my head than this.

549
00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:49,040
I've had so many, I should be in the
Guinness book of fucking records.

550
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:56,080
Anyway, I'd love to sit around
and chat, but I can't,

551
00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:58,920
because I've just got somewhere...
We know, Billy, we know.

552
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:06,080
Billy, your shoelace.

553
00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:33,560
You stay here. I'll go talk to them.

554
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:37,160
What are you doing here?

555
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,440
Fellas, the girls tell me you're
moving to Spain.

556
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:41,040
Yeah, we are. We are.

557
00:26:45,320 --> 00:26:46,960
I just want to give you this.

558
00:26:46,960 --> 00:26:49,400
What? As a gift.

559
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:51,480
What...What's this for?

560
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:53,520
Oh, you know. Whatever you want.

561
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:58,040
I just want you to know,
I think it's a really good idea.

562
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:01,160
And, you know, if Spain doesn't work
out, don't come rushing back.

563
00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:03,920
You know, you could use that
money to see the rest of Europe,

564
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:05,680
even the world.

565
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:07,920
All right, thanks.

566
00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:09,520
Nice one.

567
00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:13,400
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What's going on, Mairead?

568
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:15,720
It's all right, just...let him go.

569
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,120
Where's he off to?

570
00:27:26,120 --> 00:27:27,160
Not sure.

571
00:27:29,120 --> 00:27:31,080
He's just got somewhere
he's got to be.

572
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:42,960
Well?

573
00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:44,360
I did my best.

574
00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:46,720
Where are they going?
They're following that guy

575
00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:48,840
with the lump on his head.
And where is he going?

576
00:27:50,120 --> 00:27:51,560
What the fuck is going on?

577
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:58,400
What?!

578
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:03,720
I did my best,
I tried to talk them into staying.

579
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:44,880
What now, Billy?

580
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:48,720
That phone call
that I got this morning

581
00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:51,080
was someone telling me
that my mam passed away.

582
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:54,920
Sorry to hear that, Billy.

583
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,280
Yeah, Billy.

584
00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:00,120
She wasn't a good mam.

585
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,280
She didn't really give
a shit about me.

586
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:08,880
The only happy memory I have of her
is bringing me down here.

587
00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:14,080
She used to say, "Is there anywhere
else in the world

588
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:16,880
"that you'd rather be
than right here and now?"

589
00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:25,120
Sometimes you don't really
appreciate what you have

590
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:27,560
until you spend the day
following a dangerous lunatic

591
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:30,000
with a banger on his head
halfway across the country.

592
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:35,520
Your dad gave us some extra cash.

593
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:39,720
Maybe we could book four
return flights to Spain instead.

594
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:41,280
For a holiday. Oh, my gosh.

595
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:43,040
I think that's a better idea.

596
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:44,640
Fuck's sake!

597
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:49,400
So myself and Jock were seeing
things a little bit more clearly.

598
00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:50,800
But all of a sudden,

599
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:53,440
Mam was acting like she'd got
a fucking bang on the head.

600
00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:55,520
Yes.

601
00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:00,200
What? Really?

602
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:01,440
Seriously?

603
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,080
We're getting fucking married?!

604
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:14,480
Last one in's a rotten egg!

605
00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:20,560
THEY LAUGH AND YELL

606
00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:30,720
Come on, get your kit off,
you sexy bastard, you.

607
00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:39,680
Whoa!

608
00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:43,280
I always wondered what Orla
saw in Barry.

609
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:05,600
You know what?

610
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,120
Maybe being young
isn't just for dickheads,

611
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:10,120
because there are a lot of benefits,

612
00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:12,520
like having
fuck-all responsibilities.

613
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:14,480
And maybe the only problem
with being young

614
00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:18,040
is all the grown-ups in the world
who need to sort their shit out

615
00:31:18,040 --> 00:31:21,840
and stop acting like boring
old adults.

616
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:25,920
♪ And when I need to get home

617
00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:33,040
♪ You're my guiding light
You're my guiding light

618
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:40,320
♪ When I need to get home

619
00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:48,040
♪ You're my guiding light
You're my guiding light

620
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:55,080
♪ When I need to get home

621
00:31:55,080 --> 00:32:02,520
♪ You're my guiding light

622
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:10,040
♪ When I need to get home

623
00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:16,040
♪ You're my guiding light. ♪