1
00:00:25,242 --> 00:00:27,019
- I need a poo!
- I know, darling.

2
00:00:27,044 --> 00:00:28,543
You said that 14 times already.

3
00:00:28,568 --> 00:00:29,879
It's literally all I can think about.

4
00:00:29,903 --> 00:00:31,342
- Can we go there?
- No.

5
00:00:31,367 --> 00:00:32,717
- Why not?
- Because it's a shop

6
00:00:32,742 --> 00:00:34,352
selling designer luggage
and we have no money.

7
00:00:34,376 --> 00:00:36,053
We never go anywhere anyway, so.

8
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:37,896
- Oi!
- Can I go inside?

9
00:00:37,921 --> 00:00:40,310
- It looks amazing.
- No, it's not amazing.

10
00:00:40,335 --> 00:00:42,506
We need to get home.
Come here or I'll shoot you.

11
00:00:42,531 --> 00:00:43,612
That's murder.

12
00:00:43,637 --> 00:00:45,539
No, this right now, this is murder.

13
00:00:45,564 --> 00:00:47,554
Come on, we need to get home
before Ava has an accident.

14
00:00:47,578 --> 00:00:50,009
I'm gonna poo my pants like a big pig.

15
00:00:50,034 --> 00:00:52,085
Pigs don't wear pants.

16
00:00:55,439 --> 00:00:57,639
Is this where your dad needs to go?

17
00:00:57,664 --> 00:00:59,709
No. Mum, mum, come back here.

18
00:00:59,734 --> 00:01:01,889
Stop wandering off.
We know where we're going.

19
00:01:01,914 --> 00:01:03,709
I know where we're going.
It's just up here.

20
00:01:03,734 --> 00:01:06,123
It's the foot department, for one.

21
00:01:06,148 --> 00:01:09,514
Foot-checking department.
Big old hospital, this.

22
00:01:09,539 --> 00:01:11,295
There's no foot-checking department,

23
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,327
you're just having your ankle
looked at by the physio.

24
00:01:13,351 --> 00:01:16,092
- My mum, your gran.
- Yeah.

25
00:01:16,117 --> 00:01:18,427
Used to have a chiropodist visit.

26
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,779
She was housebound, so this foot fella

27
00:01:20,804 --> 00:01:22,131
- came to the house.
- Mmhmm.

28
00:01:22,156 --> 00:01:24,621
And the priest would
be round to say mass.

29
00:01:24,646 --> 00:01:25,646
Oh, man.

30
00:01:25,671 --> 00:01:27,334
- And the Corona lorry.
- Yeah.

31
00:01:27,359 --> 00:01:28,491
Fizzy drinks.

32
00:01:29,740 --> 00:01:31,583
Laundry van for sheets.

33
00:01:32,799 --> 00:01:34,015
Fuck me.

34
00:01:34,039 --> 00:01:37,189
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com

35
00:01:37,214 --> 00:01:38,787
Hold it in, sweetheart.

36
00:01:38,812 --> 00:01:41,049
Quick, quick, I need to go!

37
00:01:41,406 --> 00:01:42,990
- Hurry up!
- Right.

38
00:01:43,015 --> 00:01:45,318
There we go.
Upstairs, straight to the toilet.

39
00:01:46,423 --> 00:01:47,756
Jellyfish sting is a thing,

40
00:01:47,781 --> 00:01:49,584
but pissing on a bee sting,

41
00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:51,476
that's a whole new territory.

42
00:01:51,501 --> 00:01:53,467
Hey, sweetheart.

43
00:01:53,492 --> 00:01:56,225
Don't worry,
these awful bastards are on their way.

44
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,799
Guys, Ally.

45
00:01:57,824 --> 00:01:59,722
- Ally, these awful bastards.
- Hiya.

46
00:01:59,747 --> 00:02:00,771
- Hello.
- Hi.

47
00:02:00,796 --> 00:02:02,279
Ava, up you go for a poo.

48
00:02:02,304 --> 00:02:03,530
Shout down when you need wiping.

49
00:02:03,554 --> 00:02:05,640
- Careful on the stairs.
- Okay!

50
00:02:05,820 --> 00:02:07,654
Well, fantastic meal, Mike.

51
00:02:07,679 --> 00:02:10,615
Happy you enjoyed it.
So, Lamb and Flag tonight.

52
00:02:10,640 --> 00:02:12,561
I might need a little help
with the dirty business.

53
00:02:12,585 --> 00:02:14,335
No, no, we've got you covered, mate.

54
00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:15,592
Just no single malts.

55
00:02:15,625 --> 00:02:17,429
All right, agreed. Brandy it is.

56
00:02:19,377 --> 00:02:20,443
On your way.

57
00:02:20,468 --> 00:02:21,857
- See you soon.
- Oh, no, no, no,

58
00:02:21,882 --> 00:02:23,514
I'll clear that up in a second.

59
00:02:23,539 --> 00:02:24,944
Were those the same men
that were eating lunch

60
00:02:24,968 --> 00:02:26,756
- here yesterday?
- Yeah, a couple of them.

61
00:02:26,781 --> 00:02:28,864
It's nice to give a meal to people.

62
00:02:28,889 --> 00:02:31,256
They're always buying me
drinks down at the pub.

63
00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:34,514
Fucking hell, Michael,
you've used up all the food again.

64
00:02:34,539 --> 00:02:35,999
Why didn't you just call
me when I was at the shops,

65
00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:37,818
'cause I was literally
just at the shops.

66
00:02:37,843 --> 00:02:41,296
Yeah. Well, I have a minor
issue with phone credit,

67
00:02:41,321 --> 00:02:44,139
and with not actually
having a phone any more.

68
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:46,517
Right. Now have you
found a room yet or...?

69
00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:48,022
I'm getting there.

70
00:02:48,047 --> 00:02:49,380
Believe me, I want to be out

71
00:02:49,405 --> 00:02:51,559
of your hair every bit as
much as you want me to go.

72
00:02:51,584 --> 00:02:53,784
I don't want you to go,
particularly, it's just...

73
00:02:53,809 --> 00:02:56,543
I need to hear about the
National Insurance thing,

74
00:02:56,568 --> 00:02:58,781
find out what pension money I can claim.

75
00:02:58,806 --> 00:03:00,006
- Right.
- Once I know how much

76
00:03:00,031 --> 00:03:02,131
I'm getting,
I'll move into whatever place

77
00:03:02,156 --> 00:03:04,290
I can afford, as God as my witness.

78
00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:08,294
Okay. I mean, you are
welcome to stay here, obviously.

79
00:03:08,319 --> 00:03:09,506
It's just at the same time, you aren't.

80
00:03:09,530 --> 00:03:10,851
Does that make sense?

81
00:03:10,875 --> 00:03:13,036
We don't want you living
anywhere too shitty.

82
00:03:13,061 --> 00:03:16,067
- I've finished my messy poo!
- You know what I mean.

83
00:03:16,092 --> 00:03:18,177
Coming!

84
00:03:18,483 --> 00:03:20,349
Oh, don't forget mum's
babysitting tonight,

85
00:03:20,374 --> 00:03:22,317
so please make yourself invisible.

86
00:03:22,342 --> 00:03:23,407
Mm-hmm.

87
00:03:28,558 --> 00:03:30,708
Do you want a tea from
the machine while we wait

88
00:03:30,733 --> 00:03:32,933
for your dad to have his doings seen to?

89
00:03:32,958 --> 00:03:35,349
Can we get a decent
coffee from over the road?

90
00:03:35,374 --> 00:03:37,622
The machine's stuff always
tastes a bit like...

91
00:03:37,647 --> 00:03:38,680
- Piss.
- Yeah.

92
00:03:38,705 --> 00:03:40,630
Hot piss, that burns
the roof of your mouth.

93
00:03:40,655 --> 00:03:42,922
I want some nice fair-trade
piss from the caff.

94
00:03:42,947 --> 00:03:45,239
- Do they do tea?
- Yeah, of course they do.

95
00:03:45,264 --> 00:03:47,169
No, I mean do they do it properly

96
00:03:47,194 --> 00:03:49,627
with loose leaves in a nice tea...

97
00:03:49,652 --> 00:03:51,309
Mum!

98
00:03:51,334 --> 00:03:53,137
- Oh!
- Fuck!

99
00:03:53,162 --> 00:03:54,966
You just stepped in
front of an ambulance.

100
00:03:54,991 --> 00:03:56,645
Oh, I never!

101
00:03:56,939 --> 00:03:59,317
- You've broke my arm.
- I haven't.

102
00:03:59,342 --> 00:04:01,317
- You've fractured me.
- No, I haven't.

103
00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:02,507
I was saving her life.

104
00:04:02,532 --> 00:04:04,231
- It's fine, mate.
- Dear!

105
00:04:04,256 --> 00:04:05,656
You didn't see the big ambulance?

106
00:04:05,681 --> 00:04:06,913
It don't half hurt.

107
00:04:06,938 --> 00:04:08,703
Well, I'm sorry about this.
Let me take this.

108
00:04:08,728 --> 00:04:09,958
We're gonna have a sit down.

109
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:11,728
- What, in there?
- Probably in there,

110
00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:13,739
yeah, in the hospital. There you go.

111
00:04:13,764 --> 00:04:15,264
Jesus Christ.

112
00:04:16,579 --> 00:04:19,145
I was with Paul,
just out the front there,

113
00:04:19,170 --> 00:04:20,575
and he went for me.

114
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,286
Grab her, she means, to save her.

115
00:04:22,311 --> 00:04:24,691
He went for me arm, and me stomach.

116
00:04:24,716 --> 00:04:26,990
No, don't say "went for."
I was stopping you getting run over.

117
00:04:27,014 --> 00:04:29,450
If you could let your mother speak,
please, Mr. Worsley.

118
00:04:29,475 --> 00:04:31,309
What? I was...

119
00:04:31,334 --> 00:04:33,481
With respect,
I wasn't stopping her from speaking.

120
00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:35,802
I just want to hear what
happened in Jackie's own words.

121
00:04:35,827 --> 00:04:37,528
Yeah, me too.
I'm trying to facilitate that

122
00:04:37,553 --> 00:04:39,552
so we're all on the same page here.

123
00:04:39,577 --> 00:04:42,638
- I'm very clumsy, aren't I?
- Yes, you are,

124
00:04:42,663 --> 00:04:44,708
but don't say that like
I've asked you to say...

125
00:04:44,733 --> 00:04:46,667
Don't look at me; look at her.

126
00:04:46,692 --> 00:04:49,294
He hasn't ordered me
to say anything, Doctor.

127
00:04:49,319 --> 00:04:51,583
I'm under no threat
of any more violence.

128
00:04:51,608 --> 00:04:53,411
- "Any more vi..." Christ.
- I might ask you

129
00:04:53,436 --> 00:04:55,669
to step into that cubical down
the call, Mrs. Worsley.

130
00:04:55,694 --> 00:04:57,440
I'll have a colleague give
you a further examination

131
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,122
and see if there's any other bruising.

132
00:04:59,147 --> 00:05:02,356
I hope you don't think it's
Paul's fault I got hurt.

133
00:05:02,381 --> 00:05:03,653
We just need to look you over,

134
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:05,020
give you a bit of an MOT.

135
00:05:05,045 --> 00:05:07,361
This is a kind son, really.

136
00:05:07,386 --> 00:05:10,287
Although he did once smack
me in the face with a spade.

137
00:05:10,312 --> 00:05:12,346
Plastic one, not a...
Don't say that, Mum.

138
00:05:12,371 --> 00:05:15,333
Christ, it was tiny and plastic
and for making sandcastles.

139
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:16,786
It was an accident, I was three.

140
00:05:16,811 --> 00:05:18,839
You could have had me eye out.

141
00:05:18,864 --> 00:05:21,265
He used to love being
all nude on the beach

142
00:05:21,290 --> 00:05:23,020
- when he was a toddler.
- Christ.

143
00:05:23,045 --> 00:05:25,349
Running round with
his funny little prawn

144
00:05:25,374 --> 00:05:27,067
- out for all to see.
- Oh, man.

145
00:05:27,092 --> 00:05:29,113
My colleague will be with you shortly.

146
00:05:29,138 --> 00:05:30,630
Thank you.

147
00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:34,028
Thanks. She really
was about to get run over.

148
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:37,645
- How's your son, Mr. Worsley?
- My s... Luke, you mean?

149
00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:39,888
Yes, he's fine, thanks. How do you...

150
00:05:39,913 --> 00:05:41,520
We've seen you before, right, with Luke?

151
00:05:41,545 --> 00:05:43,642
- Yeah. Quite a few times.
- Mm-hmm.

152
00:05:49,620 --> 00:05:50,620
Doctor?

153
00:05:50,645 --> 00:05:52,165
Hi, our baby fell off the sofa.

154
00:05:52,190 --> 00:05:54,393
Yeah, he's hit his head.
We left the room for one second,

155
00:05:54,417 --> 00:05:56,478
- and he slipped off.
- We put lots of cushions around him.

156
00:05:56,502 --> 00:05:57,612
- But...
- I'm sure he'll be fine.

157
00:05:57,636 --> 00:05:58,970
- Come with me.
- Thank you.

158
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:03,212
Doctor! He flew out the swing.

159
00:06:03,237 --> 00:06:04,276
I wasn't pushing him hard at all.

160
00:06:04,300 --> 00:06:05,626
He's got quite weak arms, for a man.

161
00:06:05,650 --> 00:06:07,087
- What?
- Come this way.

162
00:06:11,043 --> 00:06:13,941
Hi, he put his Spiderman
mask on backwards

163
00:06:13,966 --> 00:06:15,065
and ran into the bin.

164
00:06:15,090 --> 00:06:16,387
Ow.

165
00:06:16,412 --> 00:06:17,996
Hold on, mate. It's alright, darling.

166
00:06:18,021 --> 00:06:19,153
Excuse me, mate.

167
00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:20,544
Broken child here, mate.

168
00:06:20,569 --> 00:06:22,102
Thanks.

169
00:06:22,127 --> 00:06:23,730
- Ow.
- It's seems like

170
00:06:23,755 --> 00:06:25,512
Luke's right shoulder
has been dislocated.

171
00:06:25,537 --> 00:06:27,707
We were swinging him by his arms.

172
00:06:27,732 --> 00:06:28,918
In a fun way.

173
00:06:28,943 --> 00:06:30,208
Yeah, you know when you each take a hand

174
00:06:30,232 --> 00:06:32,597
and you lift them up and you swing them.

175
00:06:33,972 --> 00:06:35,378
Yeah, no.

176
00:06:35,403 --> 00:06:39,355
Right. Uh, well, Luke is fine,
thank you for asking.

177
00:06:39,380 --> 00:06:40,921
Very well, in fact. Thriving.

178
00:06:40,946 --> 00:06:42,546
Quite the catalogue of accidents.

179
00:06:42,571 --> 00:06:45,988
Oh, I wouldn't say catalogue.
Pamphlet, maybe, a leaflet.

180
00:06:46,385 --> 00:06:48,003
Everyone else in the family well?

181
00:06:48,028 --> 00:06:50,195
Yeah, my dad's here, currently.

182
00:06:50,220 --> 00:06:51,486
He had a fall.

183
00:06:51,511 --> 00:06:53,434
That was nothing to do
with me.

184
00:06:53,459 --> 00:06:55,121
Not that my mum's injuries
are to do with me.

185
00:06:55,145 --> 00:06:56,192
I mean they are to do with me,

186
00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:58,283
'cause I caused them,
but for the right reason.

187
00:06:59,511 --> 00:07:01,356
Well, my colleague will
check out your mum's bruises

188
00:07:01,380 --> 00:07:03,331
and see if any treatment is needed.

189
00:07:25,785 --> 00:07:27,563
- Paul.
- Yeah, come in.

190
00:07:27,588 --> 00:07:29,774
- Thanks for doing this.
- You're welcome.

191
00:07:30,106 --> 00:07:32,430
Been trying to get a table
at this place for months.

192
00:07:32,455 --> 00:07:33,766
Apparently they do things with scallops

193
00:07:33,790 --> 00:07:35,724
beyond human imagining.

194
00:07:36,013 --> 00:07:37,297
Hi, Mum. There's not much food

195
00:07:37,322 --> 00:07:38,908
but you can give the kids
spaghetti with butter

196
00:07:38,932 --> 00:07:41,477
and Marmite or sardines
and Ryvita, sorry.

197
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,602
- Where is he?
- Who?

198
00:07:42,627 --> 00:07:44,426
Him. Your father.

199
00:07:44,451 --> 00:07:46,875
I smell Green Irish Tweed
cologne and brown leather.

200
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:48,719
I'm wearing aftershave,
it might be that.

201
00:07:48,744 --> 00:07:51,025
- I just bleached the sink.
- He's here.

202
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:53,211
Why have you got that
big shit in your house?

203
00:07:53,236 --> 00:07:54,915
- Michael isn't here.
- He is.

204
00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:56,573
- Michael isn't here.
- See?

205
00:07:56,598 --> 00:07:57,918
He's at the pub with his friends

206
00:07:57,943 --> 00:08:00,196
and he won't be back until very late.

207
00:08:00,221 --> 00:08:03,071
Right, I can't be in a house
that man is staying in. Sorry.

208
00:08:03,096 --> 00:08:04,993
- Leah.
- Ugh!

209
00:08:05,617 --> 00:08:06,875
Twat.

210
00:08:12,190 --> 00:08:14,047
We'd be on the grilled sea bass by now

211
00:08:14,072 --> 00:08:15,171
if it wasn't for Luke.

212
00:08:15,196 --> 00:08:16,196
Do we need onions?

213
00:08:16,221 --> 00:08:18,758
We need everything. We have no food.

214
00:08:18,783 --> 00:08:22,265
Michael has fed the 5,000 and
3,000 of them had seconds.

215
00:08:22,290 --> 00:08:23,914
What, so are we all having...

216
00:08:23,939 --> 00:08:25,369
Spaghetti with butter and Marmite, yeah.

217
00:08:25,393 --> 00:08:28,295
It's that or Shreddies
avec Thai red curry sauce.

218
00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:29,875
I'll order a fridge full of food.

219
00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:32,165
- Tom and Jerry fridge full.
- Yes.

220
00:08:32,190 --> 00:08:34,324
Big ham and a shiny roast turkey

221
00:08:34,349 --> 00:08:38,368
and a trifle and a cheese
with massive holes in it.

222
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:40,860
Luke, Ava, dinner's ready!

223
00:08:40,885 --> 00:08:42,266
Coming!

224
00:08:42,291 --> 00:08:44,547
Oi, slow down, careful on the stairs.

225
00:08:45,834 --> 00:08:48,360
Michael was talking
about moving out today.

226
00:08:48,385 --> 00:08:49,485
Okay, good.

227
00:08:49,510 --> 00:08:50,644
- Do you want him gone?
- Hmm.

228
00:08:50,668 --> 00:08:52,244
Ava, what cheese do you
want from the shop?

229
00:08:52,268 --> 00:08:53,696
Monkey bum cheese.

230
00:08:53,721 --> 00:08:54,865
Right, and if they haven't got that?

231
00:08:54,889 --> 00:08:56,908
She likes Red Leicester.
I don't know if I want him gone.

232
00:08:56,932 --> 00:08:58,993
Most of my life I've been
wanting him to come back.

233
00:08:59,018 --> 00:09:00,430
Luke, dinner's ready!

234
00:09:00,455 --> 00:09:02,121
Luke, down here now, you little sod!

235
00:09:02,146 --> 00:09:03,386
You're already in my bad books.

236
00:09:03,411 --> 00:09:04,782
Coming in a second!

237
00:09:04,807 --> 00:09:06,321
No, not in a second, mate, now.

238
00:09:06,346 --> 00:09:09,414
Quick smart or your
dinner goes in the bin, run!

239
00:09:09,608 --> 00:09:11,608
Hurry! Hurry, hurry!

240
00:09:14,649 --> 00:09:16,810
- Ah!
- Shit.

241
00:09:16,835 --> 00:09:20,633
Ah! Ow! Ow!

242
00:09:23,113 --> 00:09:24,752
- Ow!
- All right.

243
00:09:24,777 --> 00:09:27,018
- You're mad.
- No, Ally, I'm serious.

244
00:09:27,043 --> 00:09:29,069
I'm deadly serious.
We can't take him to hospital.

245
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,069
It hurts!

246
00:09:30,094 --> 00:09:31,990
We are taking Luke to hospital.

247
00:09:32,015 --> 00:09:33,515
No! The doctor made it very clear.

248
00:09:33,540 --> 00:09:35,461
They already suspect that we are dodgy.

249
00:09:35,486 --> 00:09:38,016
Now if we go in again with
another injury, another accident...

250
00:09:38,041 --> 00:09:39,920
- But it was an accident!
- Ow!

251
00:09:39,945 --> 00:09:42,012
Do you really think they're
gonna take Luke into care?

252
00:09:42,036 --> 00:09:43,202
Yes, yes I do.

253
00:09:43,227 --> 00:09:44,904
Or he'll have to live
with foster parents.

254
00:09:44,928 --> 00:09:46,272
- They'll probably be vegans.
- Oh, Paul.

255
00:09:46,296 --> 00:09:48,680
- He hates chickpeas.
- Just calm down, calm down.

256
00:09:48,705 --> 00:09:50,376
Right, what do you suggest we do then?

257
00:09:50,401 --> 00:09:51,867
Look, if it is broken,

258
00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:54,383
can we set the bone ourselves?

259
00:09:54,736 --> 00:09:56,982
Okay. How would we know if it was broken

260
00:09:57,007 --> 00:09:58,984
and now would we reset a bone?

261
00:09:59,009 --> 00:10:01,096
YouTube! Everything's on YouTube.

262
00:10:01,121 --> 00:10:02,134
It's how I fixed the toilet.

263
00:10:02,158 --> 00:10:03,989
We could end up permanently
disabling our son!

264
00:10:04,014 --> 00:10:05,058
Yes I know, but it's either that

265
00:10:05,082 --> 00:10:06,992
or "Hello, King Herod, back again?"

266
00:10:07,017 --> 00:10:08,539
Oh, Christ.

267
00:10:08,564 --> 00:10:10,764
Shh. Ow.

268
00:10:17,260 --> 00:10:19,631
All right. Come on then, mate.

269
00:10:19,656 --> 00:10:21,805
- Come on, darling.
- Ow!

270
00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:23,952
- Ow. Ow.
- Okay. All right. All right.

271
00:10:23,977 --> 00:10:25,712
It's okay, Luke.

272
00:10:25,736 --> 00:10:27,992
We're gonna go in and
get your foot mended, okay?

273
00:10:28,017 --> 00:10:29,577
Yes, yes, listen, mate.

274
00:10:29,602 --> 00:10:31,201
You've got to tell them
that Mummy and Daddy

275
00:10:31,225 --> 00:10:33,233
had nothing to do with this, all right?

276
00:10:33,258 --> 00:10:35,610
'Cause we wouldn't hurt you,
we love you, don't we?

277
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,321
But you were running when
you shouldn't have been.

278
00:10:37,345 --> 00:10:40,459
But you shouted at me to run,
"Hurry, hurry, hurry."

279
00:10:40,484 --> 00:10:41,883
Okay, well I'm sorry about that.

280
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:43,695
So really it's your fault I slipped.

281
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,532
Listen, mate, if you'd come
down your fucking dinner when...

282
00:10:45,556 --> 00:10:46,556
All right.

283
00:10:47,034 --> 00:10:48,367
I'm sorry I shouted.

284
00:10:48,392 --> 00:10:50,202
Don't tell the doctor I shouted, okay?

285
00:10:50,227 --> 00:10:51,738
Just think about what you're
saying if they ask you

286
00:10:51,762 --> 00:10:53,261
- any questions, Luke.
- Mmhmm.

287
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:55,841
If I don't,
will you shoot me like you said?

288
00:10:55,866 --> 00:10:58,233
- Yeah.
- Come on.

289
00:11:00,366 --> 00:11:02,681
- It hurts!
- I know, sit back.

290
00:11:02,977 --> 00:11:06,063
Ow, ow.

291
00:11:06,448 --> 00:11:08,648
Ow.

292
00:11:10,499 --> 00:11:12,063
Dr. Dimitrescu?

293
00:11:12,875 --> 00:11:14,000
Ah.

294
00:11:14,444 --> 00:11:16,867
What seems to be the
problem with this young man?

295
00:11:16,892 --> 00:11:19,259
Running when he shouldn't have been?

296
00:11:23,939 --> 00:11:26,405
- So, a bad sprain.
- Yes.

297
00:11:26,430 --> 00:11:27,729
A few days off from school.

298
00:11:27,754 --> 00:11:29,775
- Yay!
- And RICE therapy.

299
00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:31,766
Rest, ice, compression, elevation.

300
00:11:31,791 --> 00:11:32,978
Luke should be better soon.

301
00:11:33,003 --> 00:11:34,069
Well, that is a relief.

302
00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:35,894
Yes, that is. Thanks, Doctor.

303
00:11:35,919 --> 00:11:38,817
And I'm going to ask
that someone visit you.

304
00:11:38,842 --> 00:11:42,610
Just to chat about child
safety in and around the house.

305
00:11:43,004 --> 00:11:44,766
Just to see if we can't make things

306
00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:47,281
a little less dangerous
for Luke and Ava.

307
00:11:47,306 --> 00:11:49,795
S... I'm sorry, do you mean

308
00:11:49,820 --> 00:11:51,735
the Social Services are gonna visit?

309
00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,797
It is the local authority's
children services department

310
00:11:54,822 --> 00:11:56,435
will be visiting, yes.

311
00:11:56,460 --> 00:11:58,560
We're gonna get a visit
from Social Services?

312
00:12:00,226 --> 00:12:01,825
Hmm.

313
00:12:05,005 --> 00:12:08,031
Okay, well thanks, shall we...
Come here, mate.

314
00:12:23,788 --> 00:12:25,130
I'm so ashamed.

315
00:12:25,155 --> 00:12:27,332
We've got fucking social
workers coming, Paul.

316
00:12:27,357 --> 00:12:29,514
- No, I know, I heard.
- They're coming around to our house.

317
00:12:29,538 --> 00:12:32,037
I mean that is serious, serious shit.

318
00:12:32,062 --> 00:12:34,787
We need to change
how we are with the kids.

319
00:12:35,189 --> 00:12:37,709
- You mean I need to change.
- No. We need to change.

320
00:12:37,734 --> 00:12:39,845
That's why I said "we" and not "you."

321
00:12:39,870 --> 00:12:42,247
Yeah, but I'm the one that
shouts at them, aren't I?

322
00:12:42,272 --> 00:12:44,139
I'm the rager. I'm Hair Trigger Harry,

323
00:12:44,164 --> 00:12:46,251
I'm the one who made
Luke run down the stairs.

324
00:12:48,660 --> 00:12:50,248
Ally, I'm...

325
00:12:51,272 --> 00:12:52,871
I'm not an abuser, am I?

326
00:12:52,896 --> 00:12:54,772
- Of course not.
- I mean I'd never hit them.

327
00:12:54,797 --> 00:12:56,730
Luke's just had a lot of accidents.

328
00:12:56,755 --> 00:13:00,065
Well, some psychologists would say

329
00:13:00,090 --> 00:13:02,357
that nothing is ever really an accident.

330
00:13:03,098 --> 00:13:05,287
I have never beaten you.

331
00:13:05,846 --> 00:13:09,041
An adult shouldn't beat a child,
that's my motto.

332
00:13:09,066 --> 00:13:11,560
Not really sure you
can claim that as yours.

333
00:13:11,661 --> 00:13:13,771
I sometimes smacked you.

334
00:13:13,796 --> 00:13:16,531
Back of the legs, fine.
And your mam hit you.

335
00:13:16,556 --> 00:13:19,341
Women are allowed to hit.
But you were never beaten.

336
00:13:19,366 --> 00:13:20,485
Many thanks.

337
00:13:20,510 --> 00:13:21,755
Though it is a fine distinction.

338
00:13:21,779 --> 00:13:25,185
- No, beating involves a shoe.
- Oh, it does?

339
00:13:25,210 --> 00:13:27,426
Right, that's the UN definition, is it?

340
00:13:27,451 --> 00:13:28,918
Well, a weapon of some kind.

341
00:13:28,943 --> 00:13:31,086
Shoe, slipper, leather belt.

342
00:13:31,111 --> 00:13:32,944
Ideally it's something you can wear

343
00:13:32,969 --> 00:13:34,771
so you always have it with you.

344
00:13:35,162 --> 00:13:38,161
- You don't hit your two, do you?
- No. Of course no.

345
00:13:38,186 --> 00:13:40,638
Non-psychopaths don't hit
their children these days.

346
00:13:40,663 --> 00:13:42,996
I mean I want to sometimes, Jesus.

347
00:13:43,021 --> 00:13:44,379
Of course you do.

348
00:13:44,404 --> 00:13:46,735
Humans have walloped the
living shit out of our kids

349
00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:48,847
since caveman-times.

350
00:13:48,872 --> 00:13:50,755
Right up until Live Aid.

351
00:13:50,974 --> 00:13:53,634
It's only in this last
generation it's all changed.

352
00:13:53,659 --> 00:13:55,669
Yeah, it was always wrong, Dad.

353
00:13:55,694 --> 00:13:58,070
You can't teach right and
wrong through violence.

354
00:13:58,095 --> 00:13:59,194
No?

355
00:14:00,479 --> 00:14:02,628
No, I mean sometimes you can, I guess.

356
00:14:02,653 --> 00:14:05,497
Maybe a swift wallop is better
than taking the iPad away

357
00:14:05,522 --> 00:14:08,200
for a week or no chocolate
for a month or whatever.

358
00:14:08,225 --> 00:14:12,263
It's quicker, but I couldn't
physically hurt my kids.

359
00:14:31,812 --> 00:14:34,781
Do you think I'm...

360
00:14:34,806 --> 00:14:37,693
subconsciously hurting Luke?

361
00:14:37,718 --> 00:14:39,748
- Oh, don't be daft.
- No, seriously.

362
00:14:39,773 --> 00:14:42,748
Maybe I want to hit him
sometimes, like I was hit,

363
00:14:42,773 --> 00:14:45,295
but I know I can't,
so I hurt him in other ways,

364
00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:48,912
subconsciously via swings or stairs,

365
00:14:48,937 --> 00:14:50,404
or a dislocated shoulder.

366
00:14:50,429 --> 00:14:52,148
We both dislocated Luke's shoulder.

367
00:14:52,173 --> 00:14:53,840
That's sweet of you to say.

368
00:14:53,865 --> 00:14:57,466
Look, we are, we're in shock.
We just need to get some sleep.

369
00:14:59,083 --> 00:15:00,579
Do you reckon they'll
go through the bins?

370
00:15:00,603 --> 00:15:02,570
- See how much we drink?
- I don't know, Paul.

371
00:15:02,595 --> 00:15:03,750
I really don't, 'cause I never been

372
00:15:03,774 --> 00:15:06,273
in a fucking Ken Loach
film like this before.

373
00:15:06,972 --> 00:15:08,271
Ally.

374
00:15:27,966 --> 00:15:29,773
Oh, it comes around again, doesn't it?

375
00:15:29,798 --> 00:15:31,304
- What's that, Carl?
- Bin day.

376
00:15:31,329 --> 00:15:33,359
You think it can't be
a week since I last put

377
00:15:33,384 --> 00:15:35,843
the recycling out,
but of course, it always is.

378
00:15:35,868 --> 00:15:37,434
You can't fight time.

379
00:15:37,459 --> 00:15:39,619
- Carl, can we ask a favor?
- Of course, I'll be quiet.

380
00:15:39,644 --> 00:15:42,546
No, no, it's not... it's... can we...

381
00:15:42,906 --> 00:15:45,328
put some of our
bottles in your recycling?

382
00:15:45,879 --> 00:15:47,030
Uh, of course.

383
00:15:47,055 --> 00:15:48,493
Yeah, I've only got an olive oil bottle,

384
00:15:48,517 --> 00:15:50,717
a couple of Nutella jars.
Should be fine.

385
00:15:51,007 --> 00:15:53,039
Thanks a lot. We've got some...

386
00:15:53,064 --> 00:15:56,056
People coming round.
Not to inspect us, just to observe.

387
00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:57,647
- Is it the Social Services?
- What?

388
00:15:57,672 --> 00:15:58,915
Why do you say that?

389
00:15:59,274 --> 00:16:01,532
Well it's just sometimes
you shout, Paul.

390
00:16:01,977 --> 00:16:04,110
At Luke and Ava, and people
can hear, neighbors,

391
00:16:04,135 --> 00:16:05,602
and you swear sometimes,

392
00:16:05,627 --> 00:16:07,697
and I know certain people have
thoughts about maybe calling...

393
00:16:07,721 --> 00:16:08,806
Are they talking about me?

394
00:16:08,831 --> 00:16:10,993
About whether or not I'm a good father?

395
00:16:11,018 --> 00:16:13,892
Fuckers in this terrace,
are they bitching about me?

396
00:16:13,917 --> 00:16:15,908
Bitching's a strong word,
but probably the right one.

397
00:16:15,932 --> 00:16:17,805
I don't need strangers to
tell me I'm a bad father,

398
00:16:17,829 --> 00:16:19,939
I've got myself and the
Social Services to do that.

399
00:16:19,964 --> 00:16:21,564
- How's your fridge?
- How do you mean?

400
00:16:21,589 --> 00:16:23,467
Well my sister had a
visit when she was married

401
00:16:23,492 --> 00:16:26,025
to a sociopathic narcissist,
no comparison intended,

402
00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:28,032
and she said they checked
the fridge for food,

403
00:16:28,057 --> 00:16:30,016
what your kids will eat tonight,
what they'll eat in the morning.

404
00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:31,681
Well, it's empty, currently.

405
00:16:31,706 --> 00:16:33,556
But we have got another delivery coming,

406
00:16:33,581 --> 00:16:34,814
fuck, right about now.

407
00:16:34,839 --> 00:16:36,690
Hun, we can't let them
see how the fridge is now.

408
00:16:36,714 --> 00:16:38,275
It looks like a fridge
you'd leave by the road.

409
00:16:38,299 --> 00:16:39,743
- Thank you, Carl.
- Good luck.

410
00:16:39,768 --> 00:16:40,979
And if you need a character witness,

411
00:16:41,003 --> 00:16:43,096
tell them to call the Nokia,
number's in my newsletter.

412
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:44,319
Okay.

413
00:16:52,143 --> 00:16:55,228
Hey. What's... what's this?
It was in the recycling.

414
00:16:55,253 --> 00:16:57,287
- What's what?
- Hmm?

415
00:16:57,312 --> 00:16:58,923
- Oh.
- Oh?

416
00:16:58,948 --> 00:17:00,486
You're not eligible
for any state pension

417
00:17:00,510 --> 00:17:02,389
because you didn't pay
your stamp for long enough.

418
00:17:02,413 --> 00:17:04,743
- Were you gonna tell us?
- Sure, tonight.

419
00:17:05,133 --> 00:17:06,946
I don't know how this
got in the recycling.

420
00:17:06,971 --> 00:17:08,650
I must have just put it
in there by accident.

421
00:17:08,674 --> 00:17:10,741
Some psychologists say
there are no accidents.

422
00:17:10,766 --> 00:17:12,024
Then they're morons.

423
00:17:12,049 --> 00:17:13,249
So you have no money at all,

424
00:17:13,274 --> 00:17:16,024
and no prospect of any money at all.

425
00:17:16,049 --> 00:17:17,749
I'll find a place.

426
00:17:17,774 --> 00:17:19,273
Don't worry. I'll take a job...

427
00:17:19,298 --> 00:17:21,400
Michael, you're 70,
what are you gonna do for a living?

428
00:17:21,424 --> 00:17:22,892
Be the face of fucking L'Oréal?

429
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,704
Now is not the time to deal with this.

430
00:17:24,729 --> 00:17:27,110
I am not having our kids taken
away and replaced by you.

431
00:17:27,135 --> 00:17:29,384
- That is not the plan.
- I understand.

432
00:17:29,409 --> 00:17:32,710
I'll disappear before the
child catchers arrive.

433
00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:34,414
- Fucking hell.
- Where's our shopping,

434
00:17:34,438 --> 00:17:35,617
- by the way?
- Yeah, I know. It's late.

435
00:17:35,641 --> 00:17:36,642
Do you want me to go
out and get some stuff?

436
00:17:36,666 --> 00:17:38,057
No, there's no time,
and then we'll end up

437
00:17:38,081 --> 00:17:39,088
with two lots of shopping...

438
00:17:39,112 --> 00:17:41,955
and it'll look like mad over-caterers
making our kids obese.

439
00:17:41,980 --> 00:17:43,237
- Hello?
- <i>Is that Mr. Worsley?</i>

440
00:17:43,262 --> 00:17:44,370
- Yes it is.
- <i>Your shopping delivery.</i>

441
00:17:44,394 --> 00:17:46,010
Oh right. Supermarket delivery guy.

442
00:17:46,035 --> 00:17:47,408
- Oh.
- <i>It's nose to tail here.</i>

443
00:17:47,433 --> 00:17:49,277
There's an accident up ahead,
so I'm gonna be late.

444
00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:50,307
<i>Very sorry, sir.</i>

445
00:17:50,332 --> 00:17:51,893
No, no, how late? You can't be late.

446
00:17:51,918 --> 00:17:54,190
Oh, it seems like
a pretty major accident.

447
00:17:54,215 --> 00:17:56,033
<i>There's two air ambulances.</i>

448
00:17:56,058 --> 00:17:58,402
Looks like there's
definitely fatalities.

449
00:17:58,427 --> 00:18:00,527
Right, but I do need my shopping.

450
00:18:01,511 --> 00:18:03,291
<i>Don't... don't judge me.</i>

451
00:18:03,316 --> 00:18:04,861
If I don't get my shopping
in the next two minutes,

452
00:18:04,885 --> 00:18:06,785
my children will be taken into care.

453
00:18:08,231 --> 00:18:09,691
If you don't get your
shopping in the next

454
00:18:09,715 --> 00:18:11,737
two minutes your children
will be taken into care?

455
00:18:11,762 --> 00:18:13,752
<i>Sounds unlikely, I know, but yes.</i>

456
00:18:13,777 --> 00:18:16,644
Look, is there another of
your vans just a minute or so

457
00:18:16,669 --> 00:18:18,714
from my house who can give
me someone else's shopping?

458
00:18:18,738 --> 00:18:20,517
I don't care what the shopping
is as long as it's food

459
00:18:20,541 --> 00:18:22,455
and not just tampons and clingfilm.

460
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:25,213
Y... you can't have
someone else's shopping,

461
00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:26,597
<i>Mr. Worsley.</i>

462
00:18:26,622 --> 00:18:28,377
God, it's the Stasi. They're early.

463
00:18:29,104 --> 00:18:31,968
Fuck you. When my kids
are being diddled in a shed

464
00:18:31,993 --> 00:18:35,125
by some bearded nonce,
it'll be your fucking fault.

465
00:18:35,649 --> 00:18:37,086
- Hi.
- Hello.

466
00:18:37,111 --> 00:18:38,577
Hello.

467
00:18:38,748 --> 00:18:39,937
- Do you... yeah.
- Please.

468
00:18:39,962 --> 00:18:41,094
Come in.

469
00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:42,398
Thank you very much.

470
00:18:51,926 --> 00:18:53,242
3,000 a month.

471
00:18:53,267 --> 00:18:54,601
Bills included.

472
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:57,562
Boiler's just been serviced.

473
00:18:57,759 --> 00:19:00,664
It is quite a challenging
house for young children.

474
00:19:00,689 --> 00:19:02,476
Uh, yes, no.

475
00:19:02,501 --> 00:19:06,312
We bought it when we
weren't thinking about kids.

476
00:19:06,337 --> 00:19:08,008
Yeah. Not that we didn't want them.

477
00:19:08,033 --> 00:19:09,343
We did. We do.

478
00:19:09,368 --> 00:19:11,617
They mean everything to us.

479
00:19:11,642 --> 00:19:12,875
Yes.

480
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:14,359
How old are the children?

481
00:19:14,384 --> 00:19:16,109
Four and seven.

482
00:19:16,425 --> 00:19:18,225
Stair gates seem brand new.

483
00:19:18,250 --> 00:19:20,583
Ordinarily with older children
you don't expect that...

484
00:19:20,608 --> 00:19:22,274
We panicked.

485
00:19:22,299 --> 00:19:23,633
They are new. Sorry.

486
00:19:23,658 --> 00:19:25,773
We just... we put them in today.

487
00:19:28,128 --> 00:19:29,328
We're scared.

488
00:19:29,353 --> 00:19:31,742
We're scared. I'll be honest with you.

489
00:19:31,767 --> 00:19:33,633
We're fucking terrified,
excuse my language.

490
00:19:33,658 --> 00:19:34,970
We think you're going
to take the kids away

491
00:19:34,994 --> 00:19:36,562
'cause I'm a monster.

492
00:19:36,830 --> 00:19:37,830
Are you a monster?

493
00:19:37,855 --> 00:19:39,289
He's definitely not a monster.

494
00:19:39,314 --> 00:19:40,525
I try hard not to be a monster.

495
00:19:40,549 --> 00:19:41,640
I mean I love those kids.

496
00:19:41,665 --> 00:19:43,437
I don't want them hurt.
I don't hurt them.

497
00:19:43,462 --> 00:19:45,148
But sometimes accidents just happen.

498
00:19:45,173 --> 00:19:46,890
Look at Princess Diana...
Although they do,

499
00:19:46,915 --> 00:19:48,898
- sometimes think that...
- Tsts-ts.

500
00:19:49,144 --> 00:19:51,773
I'm gonna save you the trouble
of looking in the fridge.

501
00:19:51,798 --> 00:19:52,931
It's a barren fridge.

502
00:19:52,956 --> 00:19:55,047
Although we do actually
have a food truck coming.

503
00:19:55,072 --> 00:19:57,234
I can show you the receipt, on my phone.

504
00:19:57,259 --> 00:19:58,672
- Yeah.
- Yeah, see?

505
00:19:58,697 --> 00:20:01,798
One substitution. A
different kind of ham.

506
00:20:02,023 --> 00:20:03,203
That's fine.

507
00:20:04,189 --> 00:20:06,601
This is obviously a home

508
00:20:06,626 --> 00:20:07,953
where children are cared for.

509
00:20:07,978 --> 00:20:11,976
The number of books, the variety
of clothes, bathroom toys.

510
00:20:12,194 --> 00:20:15,515
It's clearly a very
child-centered household.

511
00:20:15,540 --> 00:20:17,984
Yes, it is, thank you. Thank you.

512
00:20:18,009 --> 00:20:20,523
So, have we passed?

513
00:20:20,705 --> 00:20:22,422
It's not a question of passing.

514
00:20:22,447 --> 00:20:24,898
Right. No. Yeah. But have we?

515
00:20:24,923 --> 00:20:27,524
Uh, we just need to try and
avoid any further accidents

516
00:20:27,549 --> 00:20:29,203
as much as possible in the future.

517
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:31,539
If we feel there's any
neglect of the children,

518
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,586
and that includes preventable accidents,

519
00:20:33,611 --> 00:20:36,212
we can and will legally intervene.

520
00:20:36,738 --> 00:20:39,453
- Understood.
- So we're sort of on probation.

521
00:20:39,478 --> 00:20:41,879
Well, it could be worse, I suppose.

522
00:20:42,572 --> 00:20:46,281
But obviously it could be a lot,
lot better... too.

523
00:20:47,435 --> 00:20:49,802
Yeah.

524
00:20:49,827 --> 00:20:51,005
Excuse me.

525
00:20:52,504 --> 00:20:54,083
Just a few details...

526
00:21:00,817 --> 00:21:03,419
Um... does it come...

527
00:21:03,444 --> 00:21:05,786
You just have...
if you press, lift, and then...

528
00:21:05,811 --> 00:21:06,811
Right.

529
00:21:06,990 --> 00:21:08,790
You know what? I'll just...

530
00:21:10,947 --> 00:21:13,044
- Actually safer like that.
- Yeah.

531
00:21:13,069 --> 00:21:14,335
See you later.

532
00:21:17,059 --> 00:21:18,458
Oh.

533
00:21:18,584 --> 00:21:19,833
Shall I bring the bags in, sir?

534
00:21:19,858 --> 00:21:21,558
No, just hand them over's fine.

535
00:21:23,661 --> 00:21:24,856
Cheers.

536
00:21:24,881 --> 00:21:26,591
Sorry for swearing at you earlier.

537
00:21:26,616 --> 00:21:28,536
Go fuck yourself, you little shit.

538
00:21:29,171 --> 00:21:31,263
And we're good with
the ham substitution,

539
00:21:31,288 --> 00:21:32,687
by the way.

540
00:21:38,095 --> 00:21:41,495
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com