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‎NETFLIX 影集

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‎我才剛重建好，又被他毀了！

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‎而你執行的唯一警務
‎就是唱《活力四射》

4
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‎我告訴你，你被開除了！
‎還有你那些其他白痴警察也是

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‎靠

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‎蘭度，我現在就要生寶寶了！

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‎卡倫，我就在想還要多久
‎妳又會讓自己變成焦點

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‎不！

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‎不！

10
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‎多比，你到底是怎麼了？

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‎我們可沒有教育你
‎要吞食狗、成人跟變態

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‎他是學你的，羅比

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‎這可不一樣，我那麼做有錢拿

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‎多比小混蛋，快點滾回家

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‎-幸好一切都解決了
‎-蘭度，寶寶要生了！

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‎好吧，幫妳叫輛優步去醫院吧？

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‎尖峰時段漲價，靠

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‎因為某人剛才把我開除了
‎所以我們最好搭優步共乘

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‎你們有人叫了優步共乘嗎？

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‎去諮商時，我絕對會提這件事

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‎身為你們的心理諮商師

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‎我記得我建議過你
‎見證你孩子的出生過程

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‎你是醫生你說了算，厄爾醫生

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‎（天堂市醫院）

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‎醫生，你覺得還好嗎？

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‎有點不對勁，我洗完澡又大便了

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‎我是問寶寶啦！

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‎放心吧，蘭度

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‎就像我常說的：“死胎也是生出來了”

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‎用力，卡倫，使勁

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‎看看他

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‎他長得好像我

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‎新生兒的味道，我聞都聞不膩

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‎（屎事難料）

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‎（海軍陸戰隊）

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‎（失蹤人口）

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‎蘭度，是我拉屎在手術台上了
‎你這個死白癡！

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‎去妳的，我要留下他！

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‎我的寶貝弟弟在哪裡？
‎我等不及見他了

40
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‎容我介紹我們家的最新成員

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‎凱文克勞馥

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‎那是我的名字耶

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‎曾經是！

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‎我們以為你會是個男孩才這麼叫你

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‎他是個屎蛋

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‎沒錯！他說對了，爛咖！

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‎好吧，他已經給我下馬威了

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‎總之，我帶了東西來給你…

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‎凱文

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‎那支手機很爛，舊凱咖

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‎舊凱咖？

52
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‎舊凱咖啊

53
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‎舊版凱文爛咖
‎跟上我的思維，好嗎？舊凱咖

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‎蘭度幫我買了iPhone 11

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‎我已經在交友軟體上
‎配對到超辣正妹了

56
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‎誰要大嚐甜頭啦？

57
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‎沒錯，寶寶要大嚐甜頭了

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‎你這個小渣男，沒錯，你就是

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‎該吃點心了，小凱文

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‎妳都沒餵我喝母乳過

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‎我試過了，但你一直
‎跟我有眼神接觸還勃起

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‎我才沒有

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‎你現在就勃起了

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‎沒喝到也不會太可惜啦
‎這玩意我沒辦法直接喝

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‎這噁心爆了，但是他調的還是很酷

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‎舊凱咖，連你都得承認他比你好多了

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‎是怎樣
‎現在我是你們第二愛的兒子？

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‎不，是第三愛

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‎（歡迎蒞臨天堂市）

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‎你化身成可惡的哥斯拉
‎所以我要打你的小屁屁

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‎那份速食我們才剛買的
‎去折斷一根樹枝給我

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‎這哪是樹枝啦？這我又拿不動

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‎你明知我在假扮身障人士
‎現在回你的房間去

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‎搞屁啊？你兒子壓扁了我們家！

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‎他做壞事的時候就變成我兒子了啊

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‎但別人稱讚他異常大根的陰莖時
‎你就說他是你兒子

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‎這下可好
‎我們要去哪找新的豬窩住？

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‎狄伯，你跟我有一樣的想法嗎？

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‎我們該上職業學校，找份真正工作

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‎存頭期款，在郊區買個好房子

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‎工匠風或都鐸復興風格的

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‎我本來是想說爬到兒子的屁眼裡
‎住在他體內

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‎好，你的主意比較好

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‎卡倫，看來妳以為
‎我們被妳開除會因此難過

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‎但並沒有
‎因為現在警局變成了狂歡男人幫

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‎而這間警察局現在改名為臭男窩

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‎我們要玩桌遊，吃多穀物脆片…

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‎天啊，卡倫，拜託把工作還給我！

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‎（狂歡男人幫）

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‎早安！舊凱咖，你在幹嘛？

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‎全國的拳擊俱樂部
‎和減肥營的電話我都打遍了

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‎但沒人見到珍娜

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‎我看起來像在乎嗎？

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‎天啊，杜史迪，你以前很友善的

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‎你怎麼變成王八蛋了？

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‎這叫做性格塑造，你改天應該試試

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‎我想試著忘記珍娜失蹤這件事

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‎還有我那唬爛弟弟搶了我的名字

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‎早安，臭男們

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‎首先，大家先默哀一分鐘
‎緬懷子彈和菲茨

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‎那霍普森呢？

102
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‎我沒有忘記霍普森

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‎我也想請大家為警隊默哀一分鐘

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‎怪了，少了我們
‎鎮上似乎變得比較好

105
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‎對，我們做得很爛

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‎天堂市警局不存在了

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‎但起碼我們不用再聞到
‎遊民警察的臭味了

108
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‎喂，粉絲最愛我了

109
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‎等等，卡倫繼續讓你當警察？

110
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‎對，她說她無法開除遊民警察

111
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‎她好像喜歡這名字

112
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‎她說這是本節目史上最詼諧的笑話

113
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‎去他媽的警察！臭男窩禁止警察出沒

114
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‎那你虧大了！

115
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‎沒有我回嗆的場面，祝你們好運

116
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‎舊凱咖，把這些警局用品
‎放到億貝拍賣網去賣

117
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‎下次有人再想逗弄我

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‎我他媽就做好萬全準備了

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‎你不能拿槍

120
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‎別擔心，爸爸教他怎麼使用了

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‎沒錯，就像我教他的一樣
‎他射得超準

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‎父子獵鹿賽我們贏定了

123
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‎你要帶他去？
‎那是我們一年一度唯一的父子活動

124
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‎我當然要帶他去

125
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‎你反對打獵，而我反對花時間陪你

126
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‎蘭度說等我們贏了獵鹿賽
‎我就會是他最愛的兒子

127
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‎他就不管你的死活了

128
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‎舊凱咖，你的心情就像
‎你的陰道裂開那麼痛了吧

129
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‎如果我有陰道，它一定會裂開
‎因為我會舔爆它

130
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‎看來舊凱咖必須確保

131
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‎寶寶凱文不會贏得獵鹿賽

132
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‎使用野獸男孩古老的破壞技藝！

133
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‎太好笑了

134
00:08:24,793 --> 00:08:26,501
‎你們這些混蛋

135
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‎（天堂市動物收容所）

136
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‎你好

137
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‎我想交換這25隻有缺陷的貓
‎我上週在這裡領養的

138
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‎原來牠們沒有九條命，只有一條命

139
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‎你一週內殺了25隻貓？

140
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‎30隻，加上我過來時
‎在路上撞死的那些貓

141
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‎（超愛我的貓）

142
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‎紀錄上說，你去年領養的貓全餓死了

143
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‎先生，這當然有很好的合理解釋

144
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‎我找了一隻有毒癮的狗來幫我顧貓

145
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‎當時我是死刑犯
‎因為我殺了聖誕老頭

146
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‎你被禁止領養了
‎我們絕對不會再給你另一隻貓

147
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‎就因為我有點笨手笨腳？

148
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‎況且，你看看那些可憐貓咪
‎牠們多想跟我回家啊

149
00:09:13,459 --> 00:09:15,334
‎加菲貓也是這樣死的

150
00:09:15,418 --> 00:09:17,584
‎諷刺的是，牠是星期二死的

151
00:09:17,668 --> 00:09:20,168
‎懂嗎？因為牠討厭星期一！

152
00:09:21,709 --> 00:09:26,793
‎加菲貓的笑話耶
‎真是好笑到令人笑破肚皮喔！

153
00:09:26,876 --> 00:09:28,376
‎做得好！

154
00:09:29,584 --> 00:09:31,168
‎羅比，老兄，這樣不對

155
00:09:33,459 --> 00:09:36,168
‎你進去之前，得先把髒腳擦乾淨

156
00:09:36,251 --> 00:09:37,709
‎（歡迎）

157
00:09:37,793 --> 00:09:40,959
‎老兄，我就說這裡
‎會比我們的老家好吧

158
00:09:41,043 --> 00:09:42,709
‎牆上的屎比較少

159
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:45,793
‎媽的，天啊

160
00:09:51,834 --> 00:09:53,834
‎多比好，兄弟們

161
00:09:53,918 --> 00:09:57,376
‎歡迎來到多比烏托邦

162
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‎沒錯，多比願你平安，老兄

163
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‎自從我跟多比烏托邦的大自然
‎融合在一起後

164
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‎我真是開心得不得了

165
00:10:06,001 --> 00:10:08,376
‎這裡最適合我們養大兒子

166
00:10:08,459 --> 00:10:13,584
‎自從我成為精子牧場經營者後
‎我終於感到心滿意足了

167
00:10:15,918 --> 00:10:18,001
‎我們就應該這樣生活

168
00:10:18,084 --> 00:10:21,793
‎在未經人類破壞的真正天堂裡

169
00:10:21,876 --> 00:10:24,126
‎這裡真的有家的感覺

170
00:10:24,209 --> 00:10:27,293
‎至少馬上就像家了
‎狄伯，把那些廢物倒下來

171
00:10:29,668 --> 00:10:31,168
‎搞什麼鬼？

172
00:10:31,251 --> 00:10:34,501
‎你把所有白人垃圾的東西
‎都帶來了嗎？

173
00:10:34,584 --> 00:10:37,543
‎沒錯，各位來賓，歡迎搖滾小子！

174
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‎大家好！誰準備好聽爛音樂了？

175
00:10:43,293 --> 00:10:45,251
‎我可愛的小傢伙

176
00:10:45,334 --> 00:10:49,626
‎媽咪上班的時候會很想你的，沒錯

177
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‎幸好妳沒有像生了舊凱咖後
‎有嚴重產後憂鬱症

178
00:10:54,084 --> 00:10:56,501
‎我沒事，我快樂得不得了，再見！

179
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‎我他媽恨死你了！我的家人去死吧！

180
00:11:03,668 --> 00:11:05,876
‎妳會熬過去的，卡倫

181
00:11:05,959 --> 00:11:08,959
‎我在襁褓時期時
‎我母親也有產後憂鬱症

182
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,168
‎往好處想，我學會了游泳

183
00:11:11,251 --> 00:11:13,543
‎我坐的那輛車被推進湖裡了

184
00:11:14,626 --> 00:11:16,626
‎謝謝你幫我打氣

185
00:11:16,709 --> 00:11:19,876
‎但我的人生爛透了
‎我留給後世的畢生心血也毀了

186
00:11:20,459 --> 00:11:24,459
‎我花了一年的時間重建天堂市
‎現在又被摧毀了

187
00:11:24,543 --> 00:11:26,126
‎你知道嗎？老娘豁出去了

188
00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:31,001
‎不！在妳搞轟炸閃電戰之前
‎先聽我說

189
00:11:31,084 --> 00:11:33,959
‎我找到了拯救小鎮
‎和妳遺世畢生心血的方法了

190
00:11:34,043 --> 00:11:37,209
‎伊隆馬斯克想遷移特斯拉總部

191
00:11:37,293 --> 00:11:38,876
‎我認為天堂市有機會

192
00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:42,293
‎因為伊隆馬斯克
‎非常致力於毀掉自己的公司

193
00:11:42,376 --> 00:11:45,334
‎“稱英勇的洞窟潛水者為戀童癖”
‎已做到

194
00:11:45,418 --> 00:11:48,543
‎“幫雙相情緒障礙症饒舌歌手
‎總統候選人站台”，已做到

195
00:11:48,626 --> 00:11:51,501
‎“花60億美元蓋一條
‎哪裡都不通的隧道”，已做到

196
00:11:51,584 --> 00:11:54,126
‎“用符號字型幫你兒子取名”，已做到

197
00:11:54,209 --> 00:11:56,626
‎今天做得很不錯，伊隆，搞定！

198
00:11:56,709 --> 00:11:58,209
‎（父子獵鹿賽）

199
00:12:00,751 --> 00:12:03,209
‎那個新來的是誰？看起來像怪胎

200
00:12:03,293 --> 00:12:04,793
‎我覺得看起來還行啦

201
00:12:06,959 --> 00:12:10,126
‎這種批判態度
‎就是你離婚的原因，老兄

202
00:12:10,209 --> 00:12:13,418
‎注意！各位…鹿同胞們

203
00:12:13,501 --> 00:12:17,376
‎我們有多少人都在父子獵鹿賽中
‎失去了親愛的家人？

204
00:12:17,459 --> 00:12:21,084
‎我要確保今年我們都不會被射殺

205
00:12:21,168 --> 00:12:23,168
‎雄鹿們責無旁貸！

206
00:12:23,918 --> 00:12:25,376
‎雄鹿…

207
00:12:26,168 --> 00:12:28,376
‎你很失禮耶，老兄

208
00:12:28,459 --> 00:12:30,293
‎穿這個可以保護你

209
00:12:32,709 --> 00:12:34,251
‎等等，這是什麼？

210
00:12:34,334 --> 00:12:37,668
‎那是一把槍
‎你不會想拿槍的，槍很危險

211
00:12:37,751 --> 00:12:41,376
‎與其確保他們不會殺我們
‎不如我們先殺了他們？

212
00:12:41,959 --> 00:12:44,418
‎我們不會想殺人的

213
00:12:45,293 --> 00:12:46,459
‎你們怎麼騎馬了？

214
00:12:46,543 --> 00:12:48,043
‎進攻！

215
00:12:49,459 --> 00:12:50,876
‎好耶！

216
00:12:53,209 --> 00:12:56,709
‎王八蛋居然說我不能養貓咪！
‎我要讓他看看我的厲害

217
00:12:57,751 --> 00:12:59,001
‎好吃

218
00:12:59,084 --> 00:13:00,334
‎鮮嫩多汁

219
00:13:01,084 --> 00:13:02,418
‎絕對不是陷阱

220
00:13:05,209 --> 00:13:07,168
‎-搞什麼鬼？
‎-你就是我的新貓咪

221
00:13:07,251 --> 00:13:08,834
‎我才不是貓！

222
00:13:08,918 --> 00:13:10,751
‎-你在紙箱裡拉屎嗎？
‎-是的

223
00:13:10,834 --> 00:13:12,543
‎-你會吃老鼠嗎？
‎-會

224
00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:14,959
‎-你有銀行帳戶嗎？
‎-沒有

225
00:13:15,043 --> 00:13:18,418
‎-那你就是貓！
‎-靠，我是貓

226
00:13:18,501 --> 00:13:20,584
‎我要叫他喬治

227
00:13:20,668 --> 00:13:23,626
‎我要抱他、摸他、猛抱他

228
00:13:24,918 --> 00:13:27,376
‎放開我！你會殺了我！

229
00:13:31,001 --> 00:13:33,626
‎我就知道我該幫你去爪的，王八蛋！

230
00:13:40,043 --> 00:13:43,168
‎這麼吵，讓我的寶寶壓力很大

231
00:13:49,626 --> 00:13:53,959
‎夠了！我要召開多比烏托邦議會！

232
00:13:55,876 --> 00:13:57,501
‎好，我們必須處理…

233
00:13:57,584 --> 00:14:01,126
‎等一下，我們還沒進行
‎多比烏托邦的握手儀式

234
00:14:01,209 --> 00:14:02,543
‎握個屁啦

235
00:14:02,626 --> 00:14:07,793
‎我有一次用手跟奶昔自慰
‎結果冰雪皇后就把我開除了

236
00:14:07,876 --> 00:14:11,168
‎既然爆氣先生這麼急

237
00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:13,751
‎我們就直接演唱儀式感議會歌吧

238
00:14:21,043 --> 00:14:21,959
‎閉嘴！

239
00:14:22,043 --> 00:14:25,584
‎聽好了
‎這些鄉巴佬要毀了多比烏托邦

240
00:14:25,668 --> 00:14:27,709
‎大家都贊成把他們趕出去…

241
00:14:27,793 --> 00:14:29,876
‎你是認真的嗎？沒有儀式感投票歌？

242
00:14:37,501 --> 00:14:40,209
‎-羅比，你要吃完晚餐嗎？
‎-閉嘴啦

243
00:14:40,293 --> 00:14:43,793
‎可惡，這是我最後一次
‎做精子焗龍蝦給你吃了

244
00:14:43,876 --> 00:14:45,376
‎（歡迎蒞臨天堂市）

245
00:14:45,459 --> 00:14:48,793
‎寶寶凱文
‎我等不及把今年的獎盃拿回家了

246
00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:52,751
‎爸爸，你坐著扮美就好
‎辛苦的活讓我來做

247
00:14:52,834 --> 00:14:54,959
‎你們聽見了嗎？他說我美

248
00:14:56,418 --> 00:14:58,959
‎別著急，愛德華小手手

249
00:14:59,043 --> 00:15:01,501
‎獎盃會是我和傑瑞的

250
00:15:01,584 --> 00:15:03,084
‎你們連槍都握不穩

251
00:15:03,168 --> 00:15:04,418
‎誰需要槍啊

252
00:15:11,376 --> 00:15:13,001
‎怪了，我們居然還沒看見半隻鹿

253
00:15:13,084 --> 00:15:15,876
‎但我相信我們很快就會遇見那些

254
00:15:15,959 --> 00:15:18,251
‎可憐、愚蠢又手無寸鐵的動物了

255
00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:25,709
‎搞屁啊？

256
00:15:28,293 --> 00:15:31,876
‎天啊，鹿把所有配角都殺死了！

257
00:15:31,959 --> 00:15:33,501
‎快跑，罰管法官，跑啊！

258
00:15:37,376 --> 00:15:39,959
‎那些鹿從哪弄來飛機的？

259
00:15:40,043 --> 00:15:41,376
‎（天堂市市政府）

260
00:15:41,459 --> 00:15:44,751
‎你好，我想找伊隆馬斯克，麻煩了

261
00:15:44,834 --> 00:15:47,876
‎什麼？我打錯號碼了？
‎老娘豁出去了啦！

262
00:15:50,376 --> 00:15:53,793
‎自從我去馬特勞爾那裡實習後

263
00:15:53,876 --> 00:15:55,918
‎我再也沒見過這麼急著
‎按桌上按鈕的人

264
00:15:56,459 --> 00:15:57,668
‎叮叮叮！

265
00:16:00,501 --> 00:16:03,209
‎我好寂寞啊

266
00:16:03,293 --> 00:16:06,418
‎無貓生活讓我感覺好渺小

267
00:16:06,501 --> 00:16:09,001
‎不懂我為何不能養貓

268
00:16:09,084 --> 00:16:12,668
‎就只因為我把牠們都殺光了

269
00:16:13,668 --> 00:16:18,126
‎我貓貓的在天之靈一定超級想念我

270
00:16:18,209 --> 00:16:21,668
‎不，我們才不想你，胖子
‎我們對你恨之入骨

271
00:16:21,751 --> 00:16:25,459
‎記得我們在陰雨綿綿的週末
‎是如何相依偎的嗎？

272
00:16:25,543 --> 00:16:30,918
‎我記得你害我們餓壞了
‎逼我們吃自己的朋友

273
00:16:31,501 --> 00:16:32,793
‎沒什麼能破壞你我的羈絆

274
00:16:32,876 --> 00:16:34,834
‎你抱我抱到我的頭爆掉

275
00:16:34,918 --> 00:16:36,668
‎你每天都用舌頭幫我洗澡

276
00:16:36,751 --> 00:16:38,501
‎你害我得了A型肝炎

277
00:16:38,584 --> 00:16:40,334
‎我從未聽過有貓咪抱怨

278
00:16:40,418 --> 00:16:42,584
‎你用你屁股和蛋蛋之間的肥肉壓扁我

279
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,334
‎我值得再擁有一次機會

280
00:16:44,834 --> 00:16:47,751
‎老兄，你才用了那次機會把我殺死

281
00:16:48,626 --> 00:16:51,418
‎我為你們打造了溫馨的家

282
00:16:51,501 --> 00:16:53,751
‎簡直就像貓咪版麗思飯店

283
00:16:53,834 --> 00:16:56,459
‎你的公寓是死亡集中營

284
00:16:56,543 --> 00:16:59,459
‎是貓咪的奥斯威辛集中营

285
00:17:00,126 --> 00:17:05,668
‎我還能再找到另一隻
‎毛茸茸貓咪朋友嗎？

286
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:09,543
‎不，我發誓，你再也不會找到任何貓

287
00:17:09,626 --> 00:17:13,459
‎道德淪喪到願意跟你住在一起

288
00:17:13,543 --> 00:17:19,459
‎又一次

289
00:17:21,001 --> 00:17:23,501
‎我有不同的看法，寶貝！

290
00:17:24,959 --> 00:17:29,668
‎你在海外軍人退伍協會下藥迷昏我
‎把我的屁眼操翻了

291
00:17:30,293 --> 00:17:33,543
‎你在找的應該是霍普森之歌，先生

292
00:17:40,584 --> 00:17:41,668
‎快跑，狄伯！

293
00:17:44,959 --> 00:17:46,876
‎議會已經發話了

294
00:17:46,959 --> 00:17:49,293
‎你們兩個必須立刻離開多比烏托邦

295
00:17:49,376 --> 00:17:50,709
‎怎麼來的就怎麼走

296
00:17:51,668 --> 00:17:53,501
‎那是不可能的

297
00:17:57,793 --> 00:18:01,459
‎叫我伍迪艾倫
‎因為我爆了我孩子的屁眼

298
00:18:01,543 --> 00:18:03,459
‎叮叮叮！

299
00:18:03,543 --> 00:18:04,543
‎是據說

300
00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:08,293
‎你們這些白癡破壞了
‎多比氣氛的微妙平衡

301
00:18:08,376 --> 00:18:11,168
‎多比媽的！多比烏托邦
‎這下多比完蛋了

302
00:18:11,751 --> 00:18:13,668
‎抱歉，我有動脈瘤

303
00:18:19,168 --> 00:18:23,126
‎這是我們在一起的第一天
‎我們永遠都會是最好的朋友

304
00:18:23,209 --> 00:18:27,709
‎晚餐好了，我的毛茸茸朋友
‎是你最愛吃的炸魚

305
00:18:29,126 --> 00:18:31,043
‎你會寵壞我的，寶貝

306
00:18:31,126 --> 00:18:34,793
‎我不懂其他貓咪
‎為什麼這麼怕跟你住，太誇張了

307
00:18:34,876 --> 00:18:37,043
‎我也是毫無頭緒

308
00:18:37,126 --> 00:18:42,584
‎恕我失陪，我要去浴缸
‎倒掉這鍋熱油，糟糕！

309
00:18:43,918 --> 00:18:46,251
‎看來你好像燙傷了？

310
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,709
‎他媽的！

311
00:18:49,793 --> 00:18:50,876
‎你在生我的氣嗎？

312
00:18:50,959 --> 00:18:54,043
‎生氣？拜託，我高潮了三次

313
00:18:54,126 --> 00:18:55,459
‎我會超喜歡這裡的

314
00:18:55,543 --> 00:18:58,418
‎再燒一鍋來，直接放到我的小穴來

315
00:19:00,459 --> 00:19:01,376
‎我們全都死定了！

316
00:19:01,459 --> 00:19:04,459
‎快點，我們快爬到多比的喉嚨
‎從他嘴裡逃出去

317
00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:06,001
‎你看到這混蛋的嘴巴了嗎？

318
00:19:06,084 --> 00:19:08,251
‎我們永遠無法通過那些利牙

319
00:19:08,334 --> 00:19:11,334
‎而這個近親交配的白癡
‎把另一個出口炸毀了

320
00:19:11,418 --> 00:19:12,751
‎這下無路可逃了！

321
00:19:12,834 --> 00:19:14,834
‎我還知道一個出口

322
00:19:17,418 --> 00:19:19,459
‎霍普森，你在幹嘛？

323
00:19:19,543 --> 00:19:21,501
‎他在幫改善你兒子的攝護腺

324
00:19:21,584 --> 00:19:23,251
‎是我們兒子的攝護腺

325
00:19:26,084 --> 00:19:29,126
‎這樣應該就行了，快騎上來吧！

326
00:19:29,209 --> 00:19:31,168
‎所以計畫是什麼？

327
00:19:31,251 --> 00:19:32,334
‎計畫？

328
00:19:32,418 --> 00:19:37,876
‎等他高潮，我們要騎著六匹白馬！

329
00:19:46,626 --> 00:19:49,668
‎爽爆了

330
00:19:50,168 --> 00:19:55,251
‎所以我才認為天堂市
‎會是特斯拉總部的完美地點

331
00:19:55,334 --> 00:19:57,293
‎你要親自來鎮上看看？

332
00:19:57,376 --> 00:19:59,293
‎這真是太好了，馬斯克先生！

333
00:19:59,376 --> 00:20:01,293
‎我等不及與你見面了！

334
00:20:02,043 --> 00:20:03,459
‎他要來這裡了！

335
00:20:03,543 --> 00:20:04,709
‎心情好多了嗎？

336
00:20:04,793 --> 00:20:05,959
‎我真的開心多了

337
00:20:06,043 --> 00:20:08,626
‎我買了妳最愛的咖啡口味來慶祝

338
00:20:08,709 --> 00:20:11,251
‎為什麼我的杯子上寫著卡倫？

339
00:20:11,334 --> 00:20:12,668
‎因為那是妳的名字

340
00:20:12,751 --> 00:20:14,793
‎鬼扯！你認為我是難搞的卡倫

341
00:20:14,876 --> 00:20:17,668
‎這是誹謗人的最糟說法

342
00:20:19,251 --> 00:20:21,043
‎我告訴妳，老子豁出去了

343
00:20:26,501 --> 00:20:28,751
‎好威士忌！射出六個人後，我渴死了

344
00:20:33,751 --> 00:20:38,334
‎親愛的上帝，若祢不想我再碰小孩了

345
00:20:38,418 --> 00:20:40,459
‎就給我個徵兆吧

346
00:20:43,418 --> 00:20:45,751
‎有沒有任何越南式的徵兆？

347
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:54,543
‎拜託不要射他的臉，我想騎他

348
00:20:54,626 --> 00:20:58,334
‎拜託不要殺我，我是驕傲的
‎新臭男窩之父！

349
00:20:58,418 --> 00:21:01,043
‎就是一個男人據點，但稱為臭男窩

350
00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:03,418
‎這是我能想到最好的名稱了

351
00:21:03,501 --> 00:21:05,168
‎住手，別殺他！

352
00:21:05,251 --> 00:21:07,043
‎為什麼？他們人口過剩了

353
00:21:07,126 --> 00:21:09,543
‎因為你們以為報仇會讓你們感到痛快

354
00:21:09,626 --> 00:21:13,251
‎但當你真正下手後
‎你會發現這樣是不對的

355
00:21:13,334 --> 00:21:14,959
‎你只會感到空虛

356
00:21:15,043 --> 00:21:17,834
‎你說得真動人，但我還是要殺這傢伙

357
00:21:25,834 --> 00:21:28,001
‎不！

358
00:21:31,084 --> 00:21:36,084
‎現在我的兒子
‎只剩下一個爛咖和糞便寶寶了

359
00:21:36,709 --> 00:21:39,543
‎哇靠，我的孩子是不死之身！

360
00:21:39,626 --> 00:21:41,251
‎殺雄鹿，我責無旁貸

361
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:44,751
‎這是我聽過最讚的話了

362
00:21:44,834 --> 00:21:46,668
‎那是我先開始說的耶

363
00:21:46,751 --> 00:21:48,834
‎哇靠！會講話的鹿！

364
00:21:52,918 --> 00:21:54,918
‎不死之身的寶寶拯救了地球

365
00:21:55,001 --> 00:21:57,584
‎解決了如同《猩球崛起》那樣的
‎群鹿崛起危機

366
00:21:57,668 --> 00:22:00,418
‎並且贏得了廉價的塑膠獎盃

367
00:22:00,501 --> 00:22:02,959
‎現在來解釋一下
‎這個寶寶為何有不死之身

368
00:22:03,043 --> 00:22:05,668
‎這一點在本季稍後可能會變得較重要

369
00:22:05,751 --> 00:22:09,293
‎他是川普大學醫學院唯一的畢業生

370
00:22:10,209 --> 00:22:14,376
‎檢查了寶寶的身體後
‎我們發現他的不死之身

371
00:22:14,459 --> 00:22:16,126
‎似乎跟他來自於

372
00:22:16,209 --> 00:22:19,334
‎拒絕死亡的15年精子有關

373
00:22:21,543 --> 00:22:25,709
‎另一件新聞，一個年老體弱的
‎變態老糊塗發瘋了

374
00:22:25,793 --> 00:22:28,501
‎並經營了一個的巨大精子牧場

375
00:22:32,418 --> 00:22:33,584
‎丙下品質

376
00:22:35,126 --> 00:22:39,293
‎我貓貓的在天之靈一定超級想念我

377
00:22:39,376 --> 00:22:43,084
‎不，我們才不想你，胖子
‎我們對你恨之入骨

378
00:22:43,168 --> 00:22:46,626
‎記得我們在陰雨綿綿的週末
‎是如何相依偎的嗎？

379
00:22:46,709 --> 00:22:52,543
‎我記得你害我們餓壞了
‎逼我們吃自己的朋友

380
00:22:52,626 --> 00:22:54,043
‎沒什麼能破壞你我的羈絆

381
00:22:54,126 --> 00:22:56,084
‎你抱我抱到我的頭爆掉

382
00:22:56,168 --> 00:22:57,959
‎你每天都用舌頭幫我洗澡

383
00:22:58,043 --> 00:22:59,751
‎你害我得了A型肝炎

384
00:22:59,834 --> 00:23:01,501
‎我從未聽過有貓咪抱怨

385
00:23:01,584 --> 00:23:03,793
‎你用你屁股和蛋蛋之間的肥肉壓扁我

386
00:23:03,876 --> 00:23:05,918
‎我值得再擁有一次機會

387
00:23:06,001 --> 00:23:09,084
‎老兄，你才用了那次機會把我殺死

388
00:23:10,334 --> 00:23:13,126
‎我為你們打造了溫馨的家

389
00:23:13,209 --> 00:23:15,293
‎簡直就像貓咪版麗思飯店

390
00:23:15,376 --> 00:23:17,376
‎你的公寓是死亡集中營

391
00:23:17,459 --> 00:23:19,084
‎字幕翻譯：許晨翎