1 00:00:05,254 --> 00:00:08,159 ♪ Stop calling your friends and say you got one ♪ 2 00:00:08,159 --> 00:00:09,630 ♪ You out here tweakin' ♪ 3 00:00:09,630 --> 00:00:12,301 ♪ While you at it, call a doctor ♪ 4 00:00:12,301 --> 00:00:16,409 ♪ You outta pocket, you need to stop it ♪ 5 00:00:16,409 --> 00:00:20,350 ♪ You saw me at the club and it was sorta poppin' ♪ 6 00:00:20,350 --> 00:00:21,587 ♪ But don't make no ♪ 7 00:00:21,587 --> 00:00:23,256 ♪ Don't make no mistakes. ♪ 8 00:00:23,256 --> 00:00:25,027 GROUP: Hey! 9 00:00:25,027 --> 00:00:26,664 (cheering and whooping) 10 00:00:26,664 --> 00:00:29,268 ALL (chanting): Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 11 00:00:30,572 --> 00:00:32,141 Aww. How are you? 12 00:00:32,141 --> 00:00:34,212 Hey. Welcome to tour. 13 00:00:34,212 --> 00:00:36,049 Thank you. Oh, my God. What is this? 14 00:00:36,049 --> 00:00:37,786 Oh, yeah, it's my alias, Dom Pagnotti. 15 00:00:37,786 --> 00:00:39,756 I wanted you to feel what I feel when I arrive. 16 00:00:39,756 --> 00:00:41,727 - Okay, cool. I love it. - Yeah. Welcome. 17 00:00:41,727 --> 00:00:43,230 - Hi. - I'll get your bag. 18 00:00:43,230 --> 00:00:45,067 Oh, thank you. 19 00:00:45,067 --> 00:00:46,604 - Let's go on the bus. Come on. - ALLY: You guys, I'm here. 20 00:00:46,604 --> 00:00:48,808 DAVE: Come on, everybody in, everybody in. 21 00:00:48,808 --> 00:00:50,444 - This is Cliff. - Hi, Cliff. 22 00:00:50,444 --> 00:00:52,214 - I'm Ally. - How you doing? 23 00:00:52,214 --> 00:00:54,720 Listen, no shitting on the bus. You shit, you split. 24 00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:56,356 Okay. 25 00:00:56,356 --> 00:00:58,059 Treat her like everybody else. 26 00:00:58,059 --> 00:00:59,228 - ♪ Hi, I'm Dave ♪ - It's not gonna happen. 27 00:00:59,228 --> 00:01:00,498 ♪ Hi, I'm Dave. ♪ 28 00:01:00,498 --> 00:01:02,167 All the way, finish it all the way. 29 00:01:02,167 --> 00:01:03,270 Finish this whole thing without burping, 30 00:01:03,270 --> 00:01:04,372 I'll be-- Oh! Uh-uh. 31 00:01:04,372 --> 00:01:06,276 - (belching) - (cheering) 32 00:01:06,276 --> 00:01:07,311 You lose. 33 00:01:07,311 --> 00:01:09,248 Can you do this shit back there? 34 00:01:09,248 --> 00:01:11,119 We owe this queen some respect. 35 00:01:11,119 --> 00:01:12,288 - Yeah. - DAVE: Oh, real classy. 36 00:01:12,288 --> 00:01:13,758 - Ooh. - EMMA: What? 37 00:01:13,758 --> 00:01:14,793 Kicking the Black men to the back of the bus. 38 00:01:14,793 --> 00:01:16,530 I'm just giving you a hard time. 39 00:01:16,530 --> 00:01:17,632 - EMMA: Okay. - This is how we talk. 40 00:01:17,632 --> 00:01:19,168 - EMMA: Yeah. - Tour life. 41 00:01:19,168 --> 00:01:20,805 Uh, how is the search for love going? 42 00:01:20,805 --> 00:01:22,542 Uh, really poorly. 43 00:01:22,542 --> 00:01:24,412 Not good. 44 00:01:24,412 --> 00:01:27,284 I thought it was gonna be like the romantic climax of man. 45 00:01:27,284 --> 00:01:30,491 Uh, instead, it's really been the stark reality 46 00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:32,294 of... humanity. 47 00:01:32,294 --> 00:01:33,531 Well, there was the girl in Utah. 48 00:01:33,531 --> 00:01:35,835 Said she was big into LDS. 49 00:01:35,835 --> 00:01:37,706 - Oh, Latter Day Saints. - DAVE: Yeah, I didn't know that. 50 00:01:37,706 --> 00:01:39,175 I thought she was talking baseball. 51 00:01:39,175 --> 00:01:41,479 - ALLY: Why? - Like the NLDS. 52 00:01:41,479 --> 00:01:44,753 - MIKE: The National... - DAVE: It was totally coincided with that round of the... 53 00:01:44,753 --> 00:01:46,624 He thinks normal human flaws are red flags. 54 00:01:46,624 --> 00:01:48,393 ALLY: Sure, sounds reasonable. 55 00:01:48,393 --> 00:01:50,598 I mean, a big one is that if they're not Rachel McAdams, 56 00:01:50,598 --> 00:01:51,767 - that's probably a... - ALLY: Ugh. 57 00:01:51,767 --> 00:01:53,436 A classic. 58 00:01:53,436 --> 00:01:54,840 There was one girl that I really didn't like 59 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:55,842 the way she danced, she was a bad dancer. 60 00:01:55,842 --> 00:01:57,779 - Mm. - Dave... 61 00:01:57,779 --> 00:01:59,382 I love bad dancers 62 00:01:59,382 --> 00:02:01,319 who have, like, all that... spirit and charm. 63 00:02:01,319 --> 00:02:02,722 But when you're a bad dancer, 64 00:02:02,722 --> 00:02:04,292 and you think that you're not, 65 00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:06,195 and like you're trying to be cool, 66 00:02:06,195 --> 00:02:07,231 but you're not, 67 00:02:07,231 --> 00:02:08,534 that's a bad attitude. 68 00:02:08,534 --> 00:02:10,270 And I don't-- I can't-- I can't do that. 69 00:02:10,270 --> 00:02:12,909 Wait. By the way, can you do me a favor? 70 00:02:12,909 --> 00:02:15,915 Can you add a name to the list, for tonight? 71 00:02:15,915 --> 00:02:17,585 Please. It's my pleasure, that's my power. 72 00:02:17,585 --> 00:02:19,388 We can do that. We have-- We have that power. 73 00:02:19,388 --> 00:02:21,225 I know, but it's, that's my job. 74 00:02:21,225 --> 00:02:22,227 - Yeah, but I'm just saying I could... - What's his name? 75 00:02:22,227 --> 00:02:23,497 You can do it if you want. 76 00:02:23,497 --> 00:02:24,265 - MIKE: What is his name? - Do your job. 77 00:02:24,265 --> 00:02:25,668 What's the name? 78 00:02:25,668 --> 00:02:27,639 Roy Winters. 79 00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:29,876 MIKE: Roy Winters, the silent film actor. 80 00:02:29,876 --> 00:02:30,878 I love him. 81 00:02:30,878 --> 00:02:33,483 You strumpet. 82 00:02:34,452 --> 00:02:36,356 Okay, I knew that you were going to do this. 83 00:02:36,356 --> 00:02:38,561 This Roy guy from college, "they're just friends." 84 00:02:38,561 --> 00:02:41,366 All this time, Dave here had a suspicion. 85 00:02:41,366 --> 00:02:43,637 Turns out, Dave here was right again. 86 00:02:43,637 --> 00:02:45,440 I never hooked up with him. 87 00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,679 I just want to win the argument that I've always won. 88 00:02:47,679 --> 00:02:49,415 ALLY: I understand that. 89 00:02:49,415 --> 00:02:51,219 And I can't win it unless you admit that I've won it. 90 00:02:51,219 --> 00:02:52,655 So what are you intentions with this man? 91 00:02:52,655 --> 00:02:55,193 My intentions... 92 00:02:55,193 --> 00:02:57,932 (vocalizing) 93 00:02:57,932 --> 00:03:00,671 Great. Everybody's creaming. 94 00:03:00,671 --> 00:03:02,976 I love your vibe, it's so chill right now. 95 00:03:02,976 --> 00:03:04,746 Thank you for saying that. 96 00:03:04,746 --> 00:03:08,921 I am just a chill girl about to have some casual sex. 97 00:03:08,921 --> 00:03:10,491 What do you want to do first? 98 00:03:10,491 --> 00:03:12,495 You want to roll me around in a stroller 99 00:03:12,495 --> 00:03:14,198 while I smoke this baby? 100 00:03:14,198 --> 00:03:17,204 No, I said I'm gonna see you at the show. 101 00:03:17,204 --> 00:03:20,712 But beforehand, I need to be Rhianna. 102 00:03:20,712 --> 00:03:22,716 And focus on my... 103 00:03:22,716 --> 00:03:24,619 Well, can I just point out that Rhianna 104 00:03:24,619 --> 00:03:26,623 is notoriously a very good friend 105 00:03:26,623 --> 00:03:28,460 and she would go to the botanical gardens 106 00:03:28,460 --> 00:03:29,563 with me and smoke. 107 00:03:29,563 --> 00:03:31,500 Will you do this? 108 00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:33,369 - Yeah, I got you. - ALLY: Yay. 109 00:03:33,369 --> 00:03:36,375 - Here. - Thank you. 110 00:03:36,375 --> 00:03:39,516 Oh, by the way, should I wear, uh, this? 111 00:03:39,516 --> 00:03:40,885 Yeah, that's cute, I like that one. 112 00:03:40,885 --> 00:03:44,225 Stop. You're fucking gorgeous. 113 00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:45,728 Which is like... 114 00:03:45,728 --> 00:03:47,699 coming here to fuck Roy Winters? 115 00:03:47,699 --> 00:03:49,736 Why? You've known him for ten years. 116 00:03:49,736 --> 00:03:51,607 It's like fucking an iPhone 5. 117 00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:54,412 Jim just hurt my feelings and was all... 118 00:03:54,412 --> 00:03:55,882 "I don't have the emotional bandwidth 119 00:03:55,882 --> 00:03:57,852 for a relationship right now." 120 00:03:57,852 --> 00:03:59,923 And Roy has always said that I'm his dream girl 121 00:03:59,923 --> 00:04:01,794 and so it's easy. 122 00:04:01,794 --> 00:04:03,329 You have a fucking vagina. 123 00:04:03,329 --> 00:04:04,900 It's always easy. 124 00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:07,371 You could literally stand there and they'd fuck you. 125 00:04:07,371 --> 00:04:08,774 You could walk outside, 126 00:04:08,774 --> 00:04:10,511 everybody wants to fuck you. 127 00:04:10,511 --> 00:04:11,880 The goal is to not get fucked. 128 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,551 Hmm. 129 00:04:13,551 --> 00:04:14,886 Not tonight. 130 00:04:14,886 --> 00:04:17,492 - Cheers to that. - Mm-hmm. 131 00:04:17,492 --> 00:04:19,729 Will you look at my butthole real quick? 132 00:04:19,729 --> 00:04:21,700 I think I cut it while shaving. 133 00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:22,702 - Check, check. - Man, these sound crispy. 134 00:04:22,702 --> 00:04:23,704 Check, check. 135 00:04:23,704 --> 00:04:25,307 Check, check, sound check. 136 00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:27,010 Check, check, check, check. 137 00:04:27,010 --> 00:04:28,581 Gata, what are your thoughts on Madison, Wisconsin, brother? 138 00:04:28,581 --> 00:04:30,016 You rocking with it? 139 00:04:30,016 --> 00:04:31,520 Check, check. Last time I was in Wisconsin, 140 00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:32,555 you ain't gonna believe it, 141 00:04:32,555 --> 00:04:33,824 I really pissed on a bitch. 142 00:04:33,824 --> 00:04:35,595 Okay. Those are the kind of things 143 00:04:35,595 --> 00:04:36,830 you shouldn't say into the microphone. 144 00:04:36,830 --> 00:04:38,767 Because other people can hear it, 145 00:04:38,767 --> 00:04:40,505 and you can get cancelled, then I... 146 00:04:40,505 --> 00:04:41,740 She wanted me to do it, bro. I'm just letting you know 147 00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:43,443 the energy is dope out here, bro. 148 00:04:43,443 --> 00:04:46,382 Man, I fucked a bitch out here with my socks off. 149 00:04:46,382 --> 00:04:47,819 You normally fuck with your socks on? 150 00:04:47,819 --> 00:04:49,054 Check, check, check, check. 151 00:04:49,054 --> 00:04:50,090 Check. 152 00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:51,727 - Check, check. - Hey. 153 00:04:51,727 --> 00:04:53,429 - Hey. Oh, yeah. Okay. - I have to... I have to. 154 00:04:53,429 --> 00:04:54,766 Right, you know, can we talk away from the stage? 155 00:04:54,766 --> 00:04:56,435 - Please? - I have been waiting for hours. 156 00:04:56,435 --> 00:04:58,406 I know, but let's talk away from the stage. 157 00:04:58,406 --> 00:04:59,810 - Okay, sure. - All right, so... 158 00:04:59,810 --> 00:05:01,078 we don't have any time to do this. 159 00:05:01,078 --> 00:05:02,649 I know you want to do the click stuff, 160 00:05:02,649 --> 00:05:04,051 but I just, we can't. 161 00:05:04,051 --> 00:05:05,855 I'm a photographer. You guys booked this. 162 00:05:05,855 --> 00:05:07,892 I don't know why you're acting like I'm just... 163 00:05:07,892 --> 00:05:10,363 voluntarily coming here and wanting to... 164 00:05:10,363 --> 00:05:12,434 MIKE: My point is, we got crunched for time. 165 00:05:12,434 --> 00:05:13,871 You're done. 166 00:05:13,871 --> 00:05:15,340 I'm confused. 167 00:05:15,340 --> 00:05:16,844 I've been here all day. 168 00:05:16,844 --> 00:05:18,547 The window that you told me 169 00:05:18,547 --> 00:05:20,551 was from 2:00 to 4:00, it's now almost 4:30. 170 00:05:20,551 --> 00:05:21,553 And it just... (whooshes) 171 00:05:21,553 --> 00:05:22,956 closed right up on you. 172 00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,793 I feel like you really mismanage your time 173 00:05:24,793 --> 00:05:26,095 and now you're just being a dick. 174 00:05:26,095 --> 00:05:27,097 MIKE: I'm sorry we ran into traffic 175 00:05:27,097 --> 00:05:28,534 and there was a big truck. 176 00:05:28,534 --> 00:05:29,736 And I think it was a pilaf truck, 177 00:05:29,736 --> 00:05:31,405 - like rice-rice pilafs. - Dude. 178 00:05:31,405 --> 00:05:32,775 - And they were block... - If you're gonna lie, 179 00:05:32,775 --> 00:05:34,044 - just do it better. - MIKE: That's not a lie. 180 00:05:34,044 --> 00:05:35,113 That's not a lie. I don't know what you... 181 00:05:35,113 --> 00:05:36,415 Is everything okay down there? 182 00:05:36,415 --> 00:05:37,552 Yeah, everything is totally fine. 183 00:05:37,552 --> 00:05:38,787 The picture girl's here. 184 00:05:38,787 --> 00:05:39,723 - I'm a photographer. - And she's-- 185 00:05:39,723 --> 00:05:40,758 Okay, same thing. 186 00:05:40,758 --> 00:05:41,827 Your organization 187 00:05:41,827 --> 00:05:43,463 is incredibly disorganized. 188 00:05:43,463 --> 00:05:45,133 Should I come resolve the situation? 189 00:05:45,133 --> 00:05:46,570 - Yes. - No. Please just finish sound check. 190 00:05:46,570 --> 00:05:47,772 I'm having trouble hearing you guys. 191 00:05:47,772 --> 00:05:48,841 I'm not a picture girl, that's... 192 00:05:48,841 --> 00:05:50,778 It's the same thing, kind of. 193 00:05:50,778 --> 00:05:52,014 - You take pictures. - I don't think that's true at all. 194 00:05:52,014 --> 00:05:53,951 - Look what you did. - Excuse me? 195 00:05:53,951 --> 00:05:55,053 Look what you did. 196 00:05:55,053 --> 00:05:56,155 Are you joking? 197 00:05:56,155 --> 00:05:57,457 - Dude, I... - Hi. 198 00:05:57,457 --> 00:05:58,961 What's going on? 199 00:05:58,961 --> 00:06:00,631 - Hi. I'm Robyn. - Dave. Nice to meet you, Robyn. 200 00:06:00,631 --> 00:06:01,767 - Nice to meet you. - DAVE: Nice jumpsuit. 201 00:06:01,767 --> 00:06:03,904 - Uh, thanks. - DAVE: Funky. 202 00:06:03,904 --> 00:06:05,841 - Funky. - For the magazine spread, 203 00:06:05,841 --> 00:06:07,845 I have to take photos, it's a whole layout, 204 00:06:07,845 --> 00:06:09,616 - I can't just get photos of you onstage. - DAVE: Of course not. 205 00:06:09,616 --> 00:06:11,720 I am now being told that I have no time. 206 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,591 Well, who the heck is saying that? 207 00:06:13,591 --> 00:06:14,759 - I did. - He is. 208 00:06:14,759 --> 00:06:16,062 - Oh, this guy? - That's right. 209 00:06:16,062 --> 00:06:17,665 You can't listen to a word he says. 210 00:06:17,665 --> 00:06:19,401 He's got it all wrong all the time. 211 00:06:19,401 --> 00:06:21,138 I mean, I'm just kidding, but... 212 00:06:21,138 --> 00:06:23,176 it does feel like some sort of mismanaged situation 213 00:06:23,176 --> 00:06:24,411 - has occurred. - It's not mismanaged at all. That's not true... 214 00:06:24,411 --> 00:06:26,449 It does sound exactly like that. 215 00:06:26,449 --> 00:06:28,052 I can't really be controlled. 216 00:06:28,052 --> 00:06:29,889 And that's kind of like the elephant in the room here. 217 00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:31,392 He's realizing that, 218 00:06:31,392 --> 00:06:32,795 he's probably gonna walk away very soon. 219 00:06:32,795 --> 00:06:33,964 Yep. See? 220 00:06:33,964 --> 00:06:36,068 Bye. 221 00:06:36,068 --> 00:06:37,705 (chuckles) Off the record. 222 00:06:37,705 --> 00:06:38,974 There's no record. 223 00:06:38,974 --> 00:06:40,578 I'm just here to take photos. 224 00:06:40,578 --> 00:06:41,980 Off the visual record. 225 00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:44,686 One thing you should realize is I'm sorry. 226 00:06:44,686 --> 00:06:48,426 Why would... saying sorry be off the record? 227 00:06:48,426 --> 00:06:50,765 I don't know. 228 00:06:50,765 --> 00:06:53,136 In all seriousness, I do feel terrible. 229 00:06:53,136 --> 00:06:54,606 If we fucked you over in any way and you thought 230 00:06:54,606 --> 00:06:56,442 you had something and it's not, I'm... 231 00:06:56,442 --> 00:06:57,912 Please, let me make it up to you. 232 00:06:57,912 --> 00:06:59,950 I can give you my whole afternoon if need be. 233 00:06:59,950 --> 00:07:02,822 Okay, well, I don't actually have the whole afternoon. 234 00:07:02,822 --> 00:07:05,060 I have another shoot later. 235 00:07:05,060 --> 00:07:08,466 But I do have a kind of fun, 236 00:07:08,466 --> 00:07:11,005 non-traditional idea if you're down. 237 00:07:11,005 --> 00:07:12,441 Will it be non-traditional 238 00:07:12,441 --> 00:07:14,078 if I'm traditionally non-traditional? 239 00:07:14,078 --> 00:07:15,615 Uh... 240 00:07:15,615 --> 00:07:17,785 And it's not a riddle. Think on it. 241 00:07:17,785 --> 00:07:20,524 Gata, I need you to do sound check without me, okay? 242 00:07:20,524 --> 00:07:21,760 - Got you, bro. - Cool. 243 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:22,629 ♪ Pissin' on a bitch, bitch... ♪ 244 00:07:40,665 --> 00:07:41,767 Hey, bitch. (laughs) 245 00:07:41,767 --> 00:07:42,769 Hey! 246 00:07:42,769 --> 00:07:45,775 - Hi. - Oh, you look... 247 00:07:45,775 --> 00:07:46,943 fantastic. 248 00:07:46,943 --> 00:07:48,914 - You, too. Hey. - Oh, my God. Hey. 249 00:07:48,914 --> 00:07:51,218 I got you, uh, your college drink. 250 00:07:51,218 --> 00:07:52,922 - A Midori Sour. - Oh. 251 00:07:52,922 --> 00:07:55,060 Quick question. In what world 252 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:57,064 would I still be drinking Midori Sours? 253 00:07:57,064 --> 00:07:58,834 In my world. 254 00:07:58,834 --> 00:08:00,103 From like ten years ago where we're still in college 255 00:08:00,103 --> 00:08:01,840 and everything is the same. 256 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,677 That's cute. I will not drink this, but thank you. 257 00:08:03,677 --> 00:08:04,813 I just had to fuck with you. 258 00:08:04,813 --> 00:08:06,950 - I already got a lane. - (laughs) 259 00:08:06,950 --> 00:08:07,952 So let me get this straight. 260 00:08:07,952 --> 00:08:09,556 Um, you flew out here 261 00:08:09,556 --> 00:08:11,092 to take me to your ex-boyfriend's concert? 262 00:08:11,092 --> 00:08:14,699 Yeah, because that's like a totally normal and adult... 263 00:08:14,699 --> 00:08:17,972 - emotionally stable thing to do. - Totally. 264 00:08:17,972 --> 00:08:19,542 Which is what I thought when you reached out 265 00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:20,945 and then I had the thought like 266 00:08:20,945 --> 00:08:22,682 we should also, we should hit up my ex-wife. 267 00:08:22,682 --> 00:08:24,686 Okay, I'm glad that you said it. 268 00:08:24,686 --> 00:08:26,188 - You were gonna... - Because I was gonna, yeah. 269 00:08:26,188 --> 00:08:29,596 For sure. Yeah. Let's pick the bitch up. (laughs) 270 00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:30,931 - Okay. - Sorry. 271 00:08:30,931 --> 00:08:32,267 She's not a bitch. 272 00:08:32,267 --> 00:08:33,704 - Or may-- I mean, probably. - Debatable. 273 00:08:33,704 --> 00:08:35,674 Ex-wife. 274 00:08:35,674 --> 00:08:37,144 That's like so adult of you. 275 00:08:37,144 --> 00:08:40,083 - It is, isn't it? - You've been like fully married. 276 00:08:40,083 --> 00:08:41,953 - Fully. - And then fully divorced. 277 00:08:41,953 --> 00:08:43,122 - Fully. - Which means... 278 00:08:43,122 --> 00:08:45,661 that you could be a Real Housewife. 279 00:08:45,661 --> 00:08:47,230 You know? 280 00:08:47,230 --> 00:08:49,101 Honestly, the whole thing was... 281 00:08:49,101 --> 00:08:50,270 pretty traumatic. 282 00:08:50,270 --> 00:08:52,942 - Yeah. - Um, kind of like... 283 00:08:52,942 --> 00:08:54,244 wrecked me. I won't get into the details 284 00:08:54,244 --> 00:08:56,583 - of all of it, but... - (insect buzzing) 285 00:08:56,583 --> 00:08:58,119 - (chokes) - It's good, like I'm-I'm... 286 00:08:58,119 --> 00:08:59,254 I'm totally fine now. 287 00:08:59,254 --> 00:09:00,825 - (coughs) - And, um... 288 00:09:00,825 --> 00:09:02,562 I mean, we're not like best friends 289 00:09:02,562 --> 00:09:03,864 - or anything by any means, but... - Yeah. 290 00:09:03,864 --> 00:09:05,835 - (gagging) - You okay? 291 00:09:05,835 --> 00:09:07,872 (wheezing): I think I swallowed a bug. 292 00:09:07,872 --> 00:09:09,141 It's like inside of me. 293 00:09:09,141 --> 00:09:10,745 You swallowed a bug? 294 00:09:10,745 --> 00:09:12,180 Um, here, you should probably drink this. 295 00:09:12,180 --> 00:09:14,586 Because it's like acid. It'll kill the... larvae. 296 00:09:14,586 --> 00:09:16,021 - Or if it was a... - (hacking) 297 00:09:16,021 --> 00:09:17,992 (growls, sniffs) 298 00:09:17,992 --> 00:09:20,163 Okay, lift up your dress. 299 00:09:20,163 --> 00:09:21,265 (clicking) 300 00:09:21,265 --> 00:09:23,002 Okay, move it a little bit? 301 00:09:23,002 --> 00:09:24,138 I love being a woman. 302 00:09:24,138 --> 00:09:25,140 What did you say? 303 00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:26,710 I said I love this. 304 00:09:26,710 --> 00:09:28,747 Move your body but just like stay here. 305 00:09:28,747 --> 00:09:29,749 DAVE: Okay, no problem. 306 00:09:29,749 --> 00:09:31,018 (camera clicking) 307 00:09:31,018 --> 00:09:32,655 That's kind of... 308 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,859 What if we get a little more hip-hop in this? 309 00:09:34,859 --> 00:09:36,763 - I don't know, man. - DAVE: What am I gonna do? 310 00:09:36,763 --> 00:09:37,899 ROBYN: I think you're gonna jump. 311 00:09:37,899 --> 00:09:38,901 (camera clicks) 312 00:09:38,901 --> 00:09:39,936 You get it? 313 00:09:39,936 --> 00:09:42,575 This is terrible. Let's go. 314 00:09:44,646 --> 00:09:45,815 Put your legs out. 315 00:09:45,815 --> 00:09:47,317 - DAVE: Legs out? - Yeah. 316 00:09:47,317 --> 00:09:49,054 Not like that. 317 00:09:49,054 --> 00:09:51,092 - Okay. Timid. - Yeah. 318 00:09:51,092 --> 00:09:52,294 So what's your deal? 319 00:09:52,294 --> 00:09:54,331 How's tour been? You just... 320 00:09:54,331 --> 00:09:55,801 drowning in pussy? 321 00:09:55,801 --> 00:09:57,337 Uh... 322 00:09:57,337 --> 00:10:01,045 Uh, I don't like hooking up with girls like that. 323 00:10:01,045 --> 00:10:02,782 - Right. - Is the implication that 324 00:10:02,782 --> 00:10:04,686 - I carry myself like a player? - No. 325 00:10:04,686 --> 00:10:06,288 Yes. Not... No, no. 326 00:10:06,288 --> 00:10:07,825 - Ultimately, no. - Mm. 327 00:10:07,825 --> 00:10:09,929 All I want is like a girlfriend, really. 328 00:10:09,929 --> 00:10:11,232 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. 329 00:10:11,232 --> 00:10:14,672 - Huh. - So, what about you? 330 00:10:14,672 --> 00:10:16,075 You must be... 331 00:10:16,075 --> 00:10:18,312 up to your neck in big dick energy. 332 00:10:18,312 --> 00:10:20,784 Up to my neck in big dick energy? 333 00:10:20,784 --> 00:10:22,087 I'm just trying to ask you about your life. 334 00:10:22,087 --> 00:10:23,356 Huh. 335 00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,661 - Not now. Yeah. - Sure. 336 00:10:25,661 --> 00:10:27,364 ROBYN: It's not really my priority. 337 00:10:27,364 --> 00:10:28,834 Career? 338 00:10:28,834 --> 00:10:31,305 - Sure. There's other things. - Yeah. 339 00:10:31,305 --> 00:10:34,178 - Besides that, yeah. Yeah. - I can only imagine. 340 00:10:34,178 --> 00:10:36,315 Tell me about Wisconsin. Do you love it here? 341 00:10:36,315 --> 00:10:37,919 Like do you think you're gonna die here? 342 00:10:37,919 --> 00:10:39,856 Do I think I'm gonna die in Wisconsin? 343 00:10:39,856 --> 00:10:42,962 - That's a crazy question to ask a stranger, I guess. - Is it? 344 00:10:42,962 --> 00:10:44,732 I'm not saying like die here today, 345 00:10:44,732 --> 00:10:46,068 I'm saying like do you think you want to live 346 00:10:46,068 --> 00:10:47,972 the rest of your life in this place? 347 00:10:47,972 --> 00:10:50,811 No, I don't think I do. 348 00:10:50,811 --> 00:10:52,113 But my family's here and... 349 00:10:52,113 --> 00:10:53,382 You've got deep roots. 350 00:10:53,382 --> 00:10:56,222 Yeah. Plus, we have snow days. 351 00:10:56,222 --> 00:10:57,992 - I love snow days. - All right. 352 00:10:57,992 --> 00:10:59,829 Get back to work. Another position. 353 00:10:59,829 --> 00:11:00,831 Titanic? 354 00:11:00,831 --> 00:11:02,735 - Ah. - Whoa. 355 00:11:02,735 --> 00:11:04,204 How's this? 356 00:11:04,204 --> 00:11:06,208 You look effulgent. 357 00:11:06,208 --> 00:11:08,346 I love the way you speak. 358 00:11:08,346 --> 00:11:10,116 Thank you. 359 00:11:10,116 --> 00:11:13,022 Why don't I take you into my world a little? 360 00:11:13,022 --> 00:11:15,226 All right. 361 00:11:15,226 --> 00:11:17,264 This is the Scroguard. 362 00:11:17,264 --> 00:11:19,034 The... Scroguard? 363 00:11:19,034 --> 00:11:22,742 It is an STD preventative tool. 364 00:11:22,742 --> 00:11:25,280 Do you...? You fuck in that? 365 00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:27,919 - Yeah, I do. - Do you...? You have...? 366 00:11:27,919 --> 00:11:29,421 You fuck women in that? 367 00:11:29,421 --> 00:11:31,358 Exclusively women. 368 00:11:32,895 --> 00:11:34,999 - Okay. - Do you wash it? 369 00:11:34,999 --> 00:11:36,703 Yeah, I wash it. I'm not a monster. 370 00:11:36,703 --> 00:11:38,372 - (sniffs) You do wash it. - I do. 371 00:11:38,372 --> 00:11:39,742 I... Can I try it on? 372 00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:41,378 By all means try it on. 373 00:11:41,378 --> 00:11:43,717 Uh, just be careful with it because I do have only one 374 00:11:43,717 --> 00:11:45,754 and the company like totally went out of business. 375 00:11:45,754 --> 00:11:47,290 What is this? You fuck... 376 00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:49,428 This is crazy. 377 00:11:49,428 --> 00:11:52,802 - We're the same size, scrote-size. - Yeah. 378 00:11:52,802 --> 00:11:54,304 You like it? 379 00:11:54,304 --> 00:11:57,043 I feel so protected. 380 00:11:57,043 --> 00:11:58,780 What you're feeling is peace of mind. 381 00:12:00,383 --> 00:12:01,920 I feel like you get it. 382 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,489 And you're still hard after all of that? 383 00:12:03,489 --> 00:12:05,159 - Oh, if there's a woman? - I just wanna like... 384 00:12:05,159 --> 00:12:08,032 Yeah, take that, you little groupie slut. 385 00:12:08,032 --> 00:12:09,167 (laughter) 386 00:12:09,167 --> 00:12:10,938 I don't talk during. 387 00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:12,207 But, yeah, you make it look good. 388 00:12:12,207 --> 00:12:13,744 Yeah, I don't know, this is, uh... 389 00:12:13,744 --> 00:12:16,181 You're a weirdly honest person. 390 00:12:16,181 --> 00:12:18,286 I have a whole wonderland of, uh, 391 00:12:18,286 --> 00:12:20,056 equipment, devices. 392 00:12:20,056 --> 00:12:22,427 There's... Don't you have that, uh... 393 00:12:22,427 --> 00:12:24,331 You said you had a thing. How are we doing on time? 394 00:12:24,331 --> 00:12:26,903 Oh, yeah, I-I... That was a lie. 395 00:12:26,903 --> 00:12:28,807 - I lied. - You lied? 396 00:12:28,807 --> 00:12:31,947 - Yeah. - For what? 397 00:12:31,947 --> 00:12:33,951 To be impressive. 398 00:12:33,951 --> 00:12:35,754 Oh. 399 00:12:37,825 --> 00:12:39,294 Why? 400 00:12:40,497 --> 00:12:42,400 To impress you. 401 00:12:44,505 --> 00:12:47,344 - Thank you for... - Yeah. 402 00:12:47,344 --> 00:12:48,947 Oh. 403 00:12:48,947 --> 00:12:51,051 Sorry. I... 404 00:12:51,051 --> 00:12:52,955 Crossed the line and I'm sorry, 405 00:12:52,955 --> 00:12:53,957 I should not have done that. 406 00:12:53,957 --> 00:12:55,426 I misread the situation. 407 00:13:02,875 --> 00:13:05,279 I'm off the clock. 408 00:13:05,279 --> 00:13:07,384 Splendid. 409 00:13:16,402 --> 00:13:18,907 (laughs) 410 00:13:18,907 --> 00:13:21,378 So not even the beach? 411 00:13:21,378 --> 00:13:24,184 No. Never fully submerged. 412 00:13:24,184 --> 00:13:25,554 So you mean to tell me that like no one 413 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:27,925 has ever seen you just completely wet? 414 00:13:27,925 --> 00:13:29,862 I'm doing everyone a favor by not doing it. 415 00:13:29,862 --> 00:13:32,167 I look like if the girl from The Ring 416 00:13:32,167 --> 00:13:34,004 was like a little round Polish boy. 417 00:13:34,004 --> 00:13:35,473 (laughter) 418 00:13:35,473 --> 00:13:37,277 Like that's-- I'm-- That's what it looks like. 419 00:13:37,277 --> 00:13:39,147 - Okay. - (phone ringing) 420 00:13:39,147 --> 00:13:41,151 Oh, um, this is a work call. 421 00:13:41,151 --> 00:13:43,155 I really got to take it. I'm so sorry. Uh... 422 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:45,026 - Is that okay? Is that rude? - Yeah, of course. No, you're fine. 423 00:13:45,026 --> 00:13:47,030 - You're not gonna... - Go, yeah, work bought me drinks. 424 00:13:47,030 --> 00:13:48,567 - I'll be like... Okay. Cool. - (phone ringing) 425 00:13:55,514 --> 00:13:57,551 (phone dings) 426 00:14:25,674 --> 00:14:27,912 ♪ ♪ 427 00:14:40,436 --> 00:14:42,407 ROY: Love the form. 428 00:14:42,407 --> 00:14:44,946 I see you're as athletic as I remember. 429 00:14:44,946 --> 00:14:47,117 (both chuckling) 430 00:14:47,117 --> 00:14:48,954 The show starts in like an hour 431 00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:51,626 if you want to go. Uh, sorry about that. 432 00:14:51,626 --> 00:14:53,262 I will put this away. 433 00:14:53,262 --> 00:14:56,435 Let's skip it and let's go to your place. 434 00:14:58,105 --> 00:15:00,143 - Okay. - Yeah? 435 00:15:00,143 --> 00:15:01,412 - (audience cheering) - Hey. 436 00:15:01,412 --> 00:15:03,215 Oh. 437 00:15:03,215 --> 00:15:04,986 Gata showed up late again with a bunch a different women. 438 00:15:04,986 --> 00:15:06,488 It's like he's trying to get catfished and murdered 439 00:15:06,488 --> 00:15:08,225 at the same time. 440 00:15:08,225 --> 00:15:10,029 (chuckles weakly) 441 00:15:10,029 --> 00:15:13,202 NPR rescheduled. So, you're welcome. 442 00:15:14,304 --> 00:15:15,641 Thank... you. 443 00:15:15,641 --> 00:15:17,645 Who are you texting? What are you doing? 444 00:15:17,645 --> 00:15:19,181 Robyn. 445 00:15:19,181 --> 00:15:20,984 I'm like totally locked in. 446 00:15:20,984 --> 00:15:22,086 Yeah. 447 00:15:34,679 --> 00:15:37,518 GATA: Y'all ready for the professional rapper? 448 00:15:37,518 --> 00:15:39,254 (cheering and applause) 449 00:15:39,254 --> 00:15:41,391 What y'all trying to do? 450 00:15:41,391 --> 00:15:43,395 Lil Dicky! 451 00:15:43,395 --> 00:15:45,701 (cheering and applause) 452 00:15:48,507 --> 00:15:51,078 (cheering) 453 00:15:51,078 --> 00:15:52,982 Wisconsin, I think I'm in love! 454 00:15:56,554 --> 00:15:57,359 Cheers. 455 00:15:57,723 --> 00:15:58,523 Cheers. 456 00:16:04,471 --> 00:16:06,375 You know, um... 457 00:16:09,715 --> 00:16:13,523 I have wanted to do this for a very long time. 458 00:16:13,523 --> 00:16:15,159 (laughs) 459 00:16:25,079 --> 00:16:26,683 That was nice. 460 00:16:26,683 --> 00:16:28,319 It... (chuckles) 461 00:16:28,319 --> 00:16:29,722 I can't even tell you. 462 00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:30,724 Every girl that I've gone out with lately, 463 00:16:30,724 --> 00:16:32,327 I have to have that awkward 464 00:16:32,327 --> 00:16:35,266 "I'm emotionally unavailable" conversation. 465 00:16:35,266 --> 00:16:38,138 So this is very nice for a change. 466 00:16:38,138 --> 00:16:41,713 Yeah, yeah, no conversation needed. 467 00:16:41,713 --> 00:16:45,186 It's like just one night only, you know? 468 00:16:48,392 --> 00:16:50,363 - I don't know what I'm doing. Music. - Oh. 469 00:16:50,363 --> 00:16:52,300 - I should turn some music on. - Yeah. 470 00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:54,705 Rock on, baby. (chuckles) 471 00:16:56,241 --> 00:16:58,078 - What'd you think of the show? - I loved it. 472 00:16:58,078 --> 00:17:00,216 I can't believe I haven't showered. 473 00:17:00,216 --> 00:17:02,186 Tough to do a concert and not shower and be so... 474 00:17:02,186 --> 00:17:03,389 - (mumbles, sniffs) - You like it? 475 00:17:03,389 --> 00:17:05,092 Yeah. 476 00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:06,729 Wait, isn't this exactly where we were, earlier today? 477 00:17:06,729 --> 00:17:08,032 Yeah. I live here. 478 00:17:08,032 --> 00:17:10,203 - You live here? - Yeah. 479 00:17:10,203 --> 00:17:11,706 Why didn't you tell me that you lived here? 480 00:17:11,706 --> 00:17:13,577 I just generally don't like to, you know, 481 00:17:13,577 --> 00:17:16,348 tell people that I'm working with that I live in the space. 482 00:17:16,348 --> 00:17:18,118 - (music playing loudly outside) - Oh. 483 00:17:18,118 --> 00:17:20,189 Ugh! 484 00:17:20,189 --> 00:17:24,231 Every night, my neighbor just plays this music, 485 00:17:24,231 --> 00:17:25,366 it's really annoying actually. 486 00:17:25,366 --> 00:17:27,771 Is it always like this here? 487 00:17:27,771 --> 00:17:29,642 - It's not, it's... - It's a big party neighborhood? 488 00:17:29,642 --> 00:17:31,278 I don't think there's a party. 489 00:17:31,278 --> 00:17:33,115 That's-- Cute. 490 00:17:33,115 --> 00:17:34,518 DAVE: There's like a little bit of a buzz on the block. 491 00:17:34,518 --> 00:17:36,789 So you got to be in here every night just... 492 00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:38,359 - doing stuff like this? - ROBYN: Never. 493 00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:40,096 I really can't dance. I-I... 494 00:17:40,096 --> 00:17:41,465 It's like my most embarrassing quality. 495 00:17:41,465 --> 00:17:43,102 - Oh, please, everyone can dance. - No, no, I-- 496 00:17:43,102 --> 00:17:44,237 - I-I hate it about myself. - Everyone can dance. 497 00:17:44,237 --> 00:17:45,774 - No. - Tonight you do, come on. 498 00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:47,511 - No, I... - Why not? What's wrong with dancing? 499 00:17:47,511 --> 00:17:49,114 - It's so easy. You just... - My joints are like... 500 00:17:49,114 --> 00:17:50,584 Just live your truth, come on. Do something. 501 00:17:52,253 --> 00:17:53,222 There it is. 502 00:17:53,222 --> 00:17:54,391 - I need more. - No. 503 00:17:54,391 --> 00:17:56,094 I need more. You're a vision. 504 00:17:56,094 --> 00:17:58,265 - I'm embarrassed. - Why? You're incredible. 505 00:17:58,265 --> 00:17:59,669 Come on. 506 00:17:59,669 --> 00:18:01,371 Yeah, whip the hair. 507 00:18:01,371 --> 00:18:03,142 Whip the hair again. Yeah! 508 00:18:03,142 --> 00:18:05,814 ♪ Since I got you, don't need painkillers ♪ 509 00:18:05,814 --> 00:18:07,551 Mm. Mm. Mm. 510 00:18:07,551 --> 00:18:09,655 You, come here. 511 00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:11,859 ♪ No fever... ♪ 512 00:18:11,859 --> 00:18:14,297 - Did you used to grind? - Oh, yeah. 513 00:18:14,297 --> 00:18:15,834 - Like, when everyone used to just, like...? - Oh, yeah. 514 00:18:15,834 --> 00:18:17,805 Yeah, I used to stand against the back of the wall 515 00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:19,675 in high school, actually, and I'd watch the other kids. 516 00:18:19,675 --> 00:18:21,546 I used to do that, too. Okay. 517 00:18:21,546 --> 00:18:22,848 ♪ ♪ 518 00:18:22,848 --> 00:18:25,119 (Robyn laughs) 519 00:18:25,119 --> 00:18:28,292 ♪ ♪ 520 00:18:28,292 --> 00:18:31,131 (laughter) 521 00:18:31,131 --> 00:18:33,803 (laughing, mumbling) 522 00:18:34,672 --> 00:18:38,278 ♪ Ow, if I be sick, nah she be medicine ♪ 523 00:18:38,278 --> 00:18:40,282 ♪ If I be high, nah she be gbana ♪ 524 00:18:40,282 --> 00:18:41,586 ♪ If I did sing, nah she be... ♪ 525 00:18:41,586 --> 00:18:43,288 (both panting, moaning) 526 00:18:47,598 --> 00:18:49,301 (laughs) 527 00:18:49,301 --> 00:18:53,843 I'm not used to muscle. 528 00:18:53,843 --> 00:18:56,749 (laughing) 529 00:18:56,749 --> 00:18:59,755 Slow has merit. 530 00:18:59,755 --> 00:19:01,693 Want to go up a level? 531 00:19:01,693 --> 00:19:05,366 - I don't know what means, but yes, yeah, yeah. - Oh. Okay. 532 00:19:05,366 --> 00:19:07,905 Oh! Oh, my God. 533 00:19:07,905 --> 00:19:09,875 (gasping) 534 00:19:09,875 --> 00:19:11,211 (panting) 535 00:19:11,211 --> 00:19:12,614 - I had an underbite. - Mm-hmm. 536 00:19:12,614 --> 00:19:14,317 I don't like to expose my underbite. Look. 537 00:19:14,317 --> 00:19:15,754 I'll do it for you because we're comfortable. 538 00:19:15,754 --> 00:19:17,190 Okay. 539 00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:18,325 Mm. 540 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:19,595 (gasping) 541 00:19:21,499 --> 00:19:23,435 Oh, my God. Oh, fuck me. 542 00:19:23,435 --> 00:19:26,375 - Oh! (laughing) - Fuck! 543 00:19:26,375 --> 00:19:27,778 Do girls like this at all? 544 00:19:27,778 --> 00:19:29,882 (voice shaking): Uh, no, it's just more disruptive 545 00:19:29,882 --> 00:19:32,353 to like how I'm speaking. 546 00:19:32,353 --> 00:19:33,623 ROY: I am so sorry. 547 00:19:33,623 --> 00:19:35,494 The show must go on, you know? 548 00:19:35,494 --> 00:19:37,263 - I am so sorry. - No, honestly, it's hot. 549 00:19:37,263 --> 00:19:39,200 - What race are you? - What? 550 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:40,937 Are you-- I don't want to ask, but I feel like you're Latina? 551 00:19:40,937 --> 00:19:42,340 I'm half Chinese. 552 00:19:42,340 --> 00:19:43,510 - Chinese? - I think it's Latinx. 553 00:19:43,510 --> 00:19:44,779 Yeah. 554 00:19:44,779 --> 00:19:46,348 Amen, sister. 555 00:19:46,348 --> 00:19:47,684 Did you say "Amen, sister"? 556 00:19:47,684 --> 00:19:49,522 Yeah, I-I wanted to say like halleluiah 557 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:52,260 or like what's a Chinese like... I don't want to bow. 558 00:19:52,260 --> 00:19:55,934 Do you remember, um, at Mooney's senior year 559 00:19:55,934 --> 00:19:59,742 when you said I was your dream girl? 560 00:19:59,742 --> 00:20:02,514 I don't remember that, but... 561 00:20:02,514 --> 00:20:03,550 it makes sense. 562 00:20:03,550 --> 00:20:05,386 (laughing) 563 00:20:05,386 --> 00:20:08,760 ♪ ♪ 564 00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:09,762 No. 565 00:20:09,762 --> 00:20:11,532 I'm like... No? 566 00:20:11,532 --> 00:20:13,268 What are you doing? 567 00:20:13,268 --> 00:20:15,907 Kegeling or keegel-- I'm making the head just... 568 00:20:15,907 --> 00:20:17,276 No. 569 00:20:17,276 --> 00:20:18,278 I don't-- There's no... 570 00:20:18,278 --> 00:20:19,380 I'm dripping sweat on you. 571 00:20:19,380 --> 00:20:20,951 Do you want me to get a condom? 572 00:20:20,951 --> 00:20:22,721 - Uh, yeah. - Yeah? 573 00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,558 - Yeah. - Okay. 574 00:20:24,558 --> 00:20:26,662 (chuckles) 575 00:20:28,566 --> 00:20:32,541 ♪ I got some new friends ♪ 576 00:20:32,541 --> 00:20:36,983 ♪ But you still want me. ♪ 577 00:20:36,983 --> 00:20:39,688 (panting) 578 00:20:39,688 --> 00:20:41,826 - Okay. - Um, sorry. 579 00:20:41,826 --> 00:20:43,730 Sorry, can we hold on one second? 580 00:20:43,730 --> 00:20:46,001 Yeah. Of course. No pressure. 581 00:20:46,001 --> 00:20:48,272 No rush. 582 00:20:50,744 --> 00:20:54,350 Sorry, I'm so sorry, um... 583 00:20:54,350 --> 00:20:56,455 Whew. Uh... 584 00:20:57,658 --> 00:20:59,427 I'm sorry, I thought I... 585 00:20:59,427 --> 00:21:02,601 could do this, but I'm now realizing that I can't. 586 00:21:02,601 --> 00:21:04,605 Oh. 587 00:21:04,605 --> 00:21:06,274 - Okay, did I do something? - No. 588 00:21:06,274 --> 00:21:08,580 No, you... You were, you were great. 589 00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:11,586 You were great. I just... 590 00:21:11,586 --> 00:21:13,590 - Ugh. - You want to talk about it? 591 00:21:13,590 --> 00:21:15,560 Yeah, I mean... 592 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:17,631 I just thought, I thought with all of this... 593 00:21:17,631 --> 00:21:20,604 history between us and me just getting out of something 594 00:21:20,604 --> 00:21:23,510 that this would be kind of like a perfect... 595 00:21:23,510 --> 00:21:25,346 rebound situation. 596 00:21:25,346 --> 00:21:26,782 I mean, I get it, I just... 597 00:21:26,782 --> 00:21:28,485 I got out of something, too. 598 00:21:28,485 --> 00:21:29,788 - Yeah. - So it's... 599 00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:32,961 I-I'm just not a-a casual sex... girl, 600 00:21:32,961 --> 00:21:35,734 I-I've never even had sex on a first date. 601 00:21:35,734 --> 00:21:37,838 - So... - (chuckling) 602 00:21:37,838 --> 00:21:39,474 You're kidding, right? I've known you over a decade. 603 00:21:39,474 --> 00:21:41,478 It's not really the same thing, this... 604 00:21:41,478 --> 00:21:43,750 No, I don't do anything like this, I... 605 00:21:43,750 --> 00:21:45,486 I really... 606 00:21:45,486 --> 00:21:47,758 This, it's just, it's feeling like 607 00:21:47,758 --> 00:21:51,899 I'm-I'm doing something that I shouldn't be doing. 608 00:21:54,037 --> 00:21:57,376 - Okay. - Which I'm not... 609 00:21:57,376 --> 00:22:00,784 - like trying to be mean, I'm just... - That's cool. No, I'm gonna... 610 00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:04,658 I re-- I... 611 00:22:04,658 --> 00:22:06,061 (faucet running) 612 00:22:06,061 --> 00:22:08,332 I wish that I could explain it better. 613 00:22:10,069 --> 00:22:12,741 Did I like gaslight you or something? 614 00:22:12,741 --> 00:22:14,410 Are you gaslit? 615 00:22:14,410 --> 00:22:15,680 No, I... 616 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:17,350 ROY: You don't owe me anything, but 617 00:22:17,350 --> 00:22:18,786 you kind of set up an expectation, 618 00:22:18,786 --> 00:22:20,624 you sent me a nude. 619 00:22:20,624 --> 00:22:22,393 ALLY: Yeah, no, I... 620 00:22:22,393 --> 00:22:23,897 I thought... 621 00:22:23,897 --> 00:22:25,767 that you kind of saw me differently. 622 00:22:25,767 --> 00:22:27,871 - (spits) - (faucet runs) 623 00:22:29,942 --> 00:22:32,681 Look, in case I wasn't totally clear, 624 00:22:32,681 --> 00:22:34,852 I don't want a relationship. 625 00:22:34,852 --> 00:22:37,456 No, I am not asking for one. 626 00:22:37,456 --> 00:22:39,060 I feel like you're kind of fucking with my head. 627 00:22:39,060 --> 00:22:41,364 And I'm confused because I just was telling you that... 628 00:22:41,364 --> 00:22:43,068 - No, no. - I don't have the emotional bandwidth 629 00:22:43,068 --> 00:22:45,072 - or the availability. - No, no. 630 00:22:45,072 --> 00:22:48,045 You don't need to reject my rejection. 631 00:22:48,045 --> 00:22:51,652 - Okay. - Okay. 632 00:22:52,888 --> 00:22:55,794 Well, at least that's clear. 633 00:22:56,862 --> 00:22:58,600 Yeah, that is crystal clear. 634 00:23:04,665 --> 00:23:06,288 What are you thinking about? 635 00:23:08,151 --> 00:23:11,458 - Right now? - Yeah. 636 00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:13,563 Uh, well... 637 00:23:13,563 --> 00:23:16,769 I'm thinking about how I have a cut on my cuticle here. 638 00:23:16,769 --> 00:23:21,111 And I'm thinking, can you get HIV 639 00:23:21,111 --> 00:23:24,718 from like having that cut on a finger and... 640 00:23:24,718 --> 00:23:27,456 the finger's fingering? 641 00:23:27,456 --> 00:23:31,499 I was just, like, evaluating the odds. 642 00:23:31,499 --> 00:23:33,937 On whether or not I have AIDS? 643 00:23:33,937 --> 00:23:36,174 How do you even sleep at night 644 00:23:36,174 --> 00:23:38,680 with all of those... 645 00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,482 crazy thoughts? 646 00:23:40,482 --> 00:23:42,219 I sleep really well, actually. 647 00:23:42,219 --> 00:23:43,890 - Really? - Eight hours a night. 648 00:23:43,890 --> 00:23:45,459 - Surprising. - Really? 649 00:23:45,459 --> 00:23:47,764 You have the personality of a real insomniac. 650 00:23:47,764 --> 00:23:49,000 No, I created a total thought process 651 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,137 that just works like a charm. 652 00:23:51,137 --> 00:23:52,874 What is it? 653 00:23:52,874 --> 00:23:56,047 - Okay, I'll tell you. Yeah, buckle up. - What? 654 00:23:56,047 --> 00:23:57,751 - Okay. - Okay. 655 00:23:57,751 --> 00:24:00,189 - So I imagine that it's the Holocaust. - Okay. 656 00:24:00,189 --> 00:24:01,892 Yeah. 657 00:24:01,892 --> 00:24:03,496 And that I am in Nazi Germany 658 00:24:03,496 --> 00:24:05,667 and I have been on the run for like 18 days. 659 00:24:05,667 --> 00:24:07,036 Couldn't be colder. It's winter, by the way. 660 00:24:07,036 --> 00:24:09,508 There's snow all over the ground. 661 00:24:09,508 --> 00:24:11,979 It's the most stressful thing in the world. 662 00:24:11,979 --> 00:24:14,952 And I've finally arrived at a family friend's house. 663 00:24:14,952 --> 00:24:17,791 They bring me up to the attic, right? 664 00:24:17,791 --> 00:24:22,834 And we go up to that attic and it's so warm. 665 00:24:22,834 --> 00:24:25,072 - Mm. - There's like wood floors, 666 00:24:25,072 --> 00:24:27,711 there's a fireplace always to the left, crackling fireplace, 667 00:24:27,711 --> 00:24:30,850 and then out the window, you can see like the amber light 668 00:24:30,850 --> 00:24:33,723 and the snow just like falling slowly. 669 00:24:33,723 --> 00:24:35,192 And I don't even have a mattress, 670 00:24:35,192 --> 00:24:38,599 I can hear the hum of the militia and the tanks 671 00:24:38,599 --> 00:24:40,804 and the Nazis like barking at one another, 672 00:24:40,804 --> 00:24:42,841 but at that moment it doesn't even matter. 673 00:24:42,841 --> 00:24:45,747 Because I'm so warm, I'm so cozy, 674 00:24:45,747 --> 00:24:48,118 and I'm so tired, 675 00:24:48,118 --> 00:24:50,824 and then I just wake up eight hours later. 676 00:24:50,824 --> 00:24:52,594 Wow. That's... 677 00:24:52,594 --> 00:24:54,230 You get it, right? 678 00:24:54,230 --> 00:24:55,533 Yeah. 679 00:25:02,748 --> 00:25:06,589 Today was like the most fun day I've ever had. 680 00:25:06,589 --> 00:25:09,093 Yeah. 681 00:25:09,093 --> 00:25:11,599 I wish you weren't leaving. 682 00:25:11,599 --> 00:25:13,870 Well, the second I do, 683 00:25:13,870 --> 00:25:16,575 you know that every single guy in Wisconsin 684 00:25:16,575 --> 00:25:18,111 is gonna descend upon you 685 00:25:18,111 --> 00:25:19,848 and you're gonna have your total pick of the litter. 686 00:25:19,848 --> 00:25:23,556 And you're gonna make some guy's dreams come true. 687 00:25:25,059 --> 00:25:26,729 Yeah. 688 00:25:33,609 --> 00:25:35,980 Oh, what time is it? 689 00:25:37,617 --> 00:25:38,986 It's late. 690 00:25:38,986 --> 00:25:41,191 Feels late. 691 00:25:41,191 --> 00:25:43,563 Feels late and early at once. 692 00:25:45,065 --> 00:25:47,671 Um, I don't want to be rude, 693 00:25:47,671 --> 00:25:50,342 but I-I have to get up so early tomorrow 694 00:25:50,342 --> 00:25:53,616 and I didn't know what time it was until just now. 695 00:25:53,616 --> 00:25:55,620 You're asking me to leave. 696 00:25:55,620 --> 00:25:59,127 I re-- it's a big gig and I don't want to fuck it up and... 697 00:25:59,127 --> 00:26:02,266 I really have to... call it a night. 698 00:26:02,266 --> 00:26:03,301 It's a big thing. 699 00:26:03,301 --> 00:26:04,738 I get it. You're a... Career. 700 00:26:04,738 --> 00:26:06,609 Maybe it's just better-- I-I don't... 701 00:26:06,609 --> 00:26:07,611 - You're a career woman. - I didn't know how late it was. 702 00:26:07,611 --> 00:26:08,880 You need to sleep. I understand. 703 00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:10,082 No one empathizes with that situation 704 00:26:10,082 --> 00:26:12,219 more than me, I get it. (exhales) 705 00:26:12,219 --> 00:26:13,321 Yeah. 706 00:26:14,925 --> 00:26:16,762 I have your number. 707 00:26:16,762 --> 00:26:18,933 (chuckles weakly) 708 00:26:18,933 --> 00:26:20,302 - Oh, no. - Yeah. 709 00:26:20,302 --> 00:26:22,239 You said that? 710 00:26:22,239 --> 00:26:25,112 I don't even know if that's the comment that turned the tide, 711 00:26:25,112 --> 00:26:27,784 and if it was, I was just being complimentary, like... 712 00:26:27,784 --> 00:26:29,120 Yeah, but you don't need to... 713 00:26:29,120 --> 00:26:32,093 like tell the truth all the time. 714 00:26:32,093 --> 00:26:34,865 You could, you know, just... 715 00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:37,871 She was great, I thought. 716 00:26:38,973 --> 00:26:40,910 Okay, well, then don't give up on her. 717 00:26:40,910 --> 00:26:43,048 Like call her from the road or whatever. 718 00:26:43,048 --> 00:26:45,385 Honestly, if you're gonna get that thrown 719 00:26:45,385 --> 00:26:47,089 by one small comment, 720 00:26:47,089 --> 00:26:49,661 then there's some deeper insecurity, like underneath. 721 00:26:49,661 --> 00:26:52,133 And I'm happy I saw it sooner than later, so... 722 00:26:52,133 --> 00:26:56,040 Dave, you have to forgive people for not being perfect. 723 00:26:58,779 --> 00:27:00,850 Enough about me. What happened with Roy? 724 00:27:00,850 --> 00:27:05,794 (sighs) I'm realizing that I can't just... hook up. 725 00:27:05,794 --> 00:27:07,664 Like, it doesn't have to mean everything, 726 00:27:07,664 --> 00:27:12,406 but it can't mean nothing, if that makes sense. 727 00:27:12,406 --> 00:27:15,379 Makes perfect sense. I get it. 728 00:27:15,379 --> 00:27:17,349 But, you know, I'm just... 729 00:27:17,349 --> 00:27:20,122 trying to fill the void, I guess. 730 00:27:20,122 --> 00:27:23,361 That is me every single night. 731 00:27:23,361 --> 00:27:25,332 Especially on tour. 732 00:27:26,434 --> 00:27:29,942 But... there's still time. 733 00:27:32,146 --> 00:27:33,850 Yeah. 734 00:27:39,026 --> 00:27:40,763 You know, I've never told you this, 735 00:27:40,763 --> 00:27:43,134 but the best thing that you've ever done 736 00:27:43,134 --> 00:27:46,307 is not get back together with me when I tried to. 737 00:27:46,307 --> 00:27:48,011 Why? Because you're... 738 00:27:48,011 --> 00:27:50,750 America's most eligible bachelor now? 739 00:27:50,750 --> 00:27:52,386 No, because I would've fucked it up between us 740 00:27:52,386 --> 00:27:53,856 and you don't deserve that at all. 741 00:27:53,856 --> 00:27:55,125 We're in such a good place 742 00:27:55,125 --> 00:27:56,762 and I'm so happy to have you in my life 743 00:27:56,762 --> 00:27:58,265 and anyone who doesn't want you in their lives 744 00:27:58,265 --> 00:28:00,002 is a fucking loser. 745 00:28:00,002 --> 00:28:02,908 You deserve everything. 746 00:28:07,784 --> 00:28:09,755 LD, what's good, bro? 747 00:28:09,755 --> 00:28:12,026 I got more flavors than Baskin-Robbins, bro. 748 00:28:12,026 --> 00:28:13,195 - Got them lined up for you. - Oh. 749 00:28:13,195 --> 00:28:14,798 Classic Gata. 750 00:28:14,798 --> 00:28:16,802 I'm okay, man. This guy's out of his mind. 751 00:28:16,802 --> 00:28:18,138 GATA: You sure? I've been listening to you, bro. 752 00:28:18,138 --> 00:28:19,808 I got all the types you said, bro. 753 00:28:19,808 --> 00:28:21,444 I got the neighborhood girl, around-the-way look, 754 00:28:21,444 --> 00:28:23,048 all that shit you was talking about? 755 00:28:23,048 --> 00:28:24,885 Let me just see if he has an understanding 756 00:28:24,885 --> 00:28:26,822 of the type of woman I'm even interested in. 757 00:28:26,822 --> 00:28:28,358 - Yeah. - Like I made him watch Wedding Crashers, 758 00:28:28,358 --> 00:28:30,162 it's just good for the rest of the tour that he... 759 00:28:30,162 --> 00:28:32,433 One second. Be right back. 760 00:28:32,433 --> 00:28:34,905 ♪ ♪ 761 00:28:34,905 --> 00:28:36,341 DAVE: Hi. 762 00:28:36,341 --> 00:28:38,946 (indistinct chatter) 763 00:28:38,946 --> 00:28:41,384 I'm Dave, nice to meet you. 764 00:28:41,384 --> 00:28:43,889 - ♪ ♪ - (chatter continues) 765 00:28:47,062 --> 00:28:49,066 ♪ ♪ 766 00:28:54,277 --> 00:28:56,314 ♪ ♪ 767 00:29:08,839 --> 00:29:10,910 ♪ ♪ 768 00:29:39,868 --> 00:29:41,939 ♪ ♪ 769 00:30:02,881 --> 00:30:08,325 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org