1 00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:18,352 [Victor LaValle] Did you know that the oldest known lullaby 2 00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:21,438 is a 5,000-year-old Babylonian song? 3 00:00:24,316 --> 00:00:29,154 "Little baby in the dark house, you have seen the sun rise. 4 00:00:30,322 --> 00:00:33,992 Why are you crying? Why are you screaming? 5 00:00:34,910 --> 00:00:36,995 You have disturbed the house god. 6 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:42,334 Tell me your journey. Each of you. 7 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:46,839 Tell me your life's voyage, and I will tell you who you are." 8 00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,403 [knocking] 9 00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:52,529 Hello? 10 00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:56,325 Emma. 11 00:02:01,914 --> 00:02:03,332 What are you doing here? 12 00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:05,542 I've been calling and texting for a week. 13 00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,294 Six-month check for you and Brian. 14 00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:11,006 He's not here. I have somewhere to go. 15 00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:12,007 What? 16 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,344 -You understand he needs a checkup? -[scoffs] 17 00:02:17,054 --> 00:02:18,138 Okay, where are we going? 18 00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:29,608 I stopped checking my phone. That's why I didn't know you were coming. 19 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:30,776 Stopped when? 20 00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,486 Hmm, about a month ago. 21 00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:34,363 Emma! Emma! 22 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:36,615 -[driver speaking Spanish] -[honks] 23 00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,912 Apollo takes the baby to the park every morning. 24 00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,414 He doesn't sleep much anymore either. 25 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:45,332 Brian? 26 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:49,169 Apollo. Having nightmares. We're all a mess. 27 00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:52,464 [Kim] You could try a little Benadryl to help you sleep. 28 00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:54,925 You can take a little while you're breastfeeding. 29 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:05,102 I'm worried about you, Emma. I see you, and I feel worried. 30 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,815 -[elevator dings] -[tenant speaking Spanish] 31 00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,025 [panting] 32 00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:22,494 [buzzes] 33 00:03:22,578 --> 00:03:23,412 [tenant] Can I help you? 34 00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:29,084 I heard about you from the message board. You were told I'd come. 35 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:31,920 [lock clicking] 36 00:03:34,256 --> 00:03:35,090 Who sent you? 37 00:03:36,175 --> 00:03:37,176 Cal sent me. 38 00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:51,106 I hope these are useful. 39 00:03:53,317 --> 00:03:54,568 -[gasps] -[chains rattle] 40 00:03:55,277 --> 00:03:56,737 [locks clicking] 41 00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,783 -[sighs] -What the hell is in there? Emma? 42 00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:05,662 -[both grunting, breathing heavily] -[chains rattling] 43 00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:09,917 Chains. Chains? 44 00:04:11,043 --> 00:04:13,962 Emma. Emma. 45 00:04:22,221 --> 00:04:24,014 [knocking] 46 00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:27,184 [groaning] 47 00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:31,146 -[Lillian] We're here. -My mom and your sister are here. 48 00:04:31,230 --> 00:04:34,233 -[baby cooing] -[smacks lips] Oh, baby. 49 00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:41,156 Red bean soup, meat loaf, mashed potatoes, lasagna, samosas, two quiches, oxtail. 50 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:42,241 Thank you. 51 00:04:42,324 --> 00:04:45,202 Oh, I love this little munchkin. 52 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:48,789 -[Lillian sighs] Mmm. [sighs] -[sighs] 53 00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:53,418 Apollo tells me you're having trouble. I had the same problem with him. 54 00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:57,172 I didn't have my mother with me either. Flying with closed eyes. 55 00:04:57,256 --> 00:04:58,340 Flying blind. 56 00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:00,843 -It just takes time. -[Apollo] Yeah. 57 00:05:00,926 --> 00:05:03,262 I'll help. Let me see what you're doing. 58 00:05:03,345 --> 00:05:04,346 [Emma] Um… 59 00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:08,267 -Good morning. All awake? -Oh, wait. 60 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,435 -[baby coos] -Hmm. 61 00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:16,859 Oh. Too bad. 62 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:19,361 -What? -Your breasts are wrong. 63 00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,612 -[Apollo] Mom. -Lillian. 64 00:05:20,696 --> 00:05:22,990 Come on. All right. Let's not do that. 65 00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:25,075 Just-- To the kitchen, Mom. 66 00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:29,872 [exhales deeply] 67 00:05:29,955 --> 00:05:33,417 Easier to know it. Sad truth is better than a happy lie. 68 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,710 [sighs] 69 00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:39,506 Mom… [sighs] …thanks for bringing the food, honestly. But-- 70 00:05:39,590 --> 00:05:40,591 [cell phone chimes] 71 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,179 Brian. 72 00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:46,346 That's his name. 73 00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:49,391 Brian. Brian. 74 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:52,352 -[sighs] All right. -You honor an invisible man. 75 00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:55,981 Did you come here to ruin the day for everybody? 76 00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:59,526 -Looks like it. -[chuckles] 77 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,531 -[grunts, chuckling] -[chuckling] 78 00:06:05,908 --> 00:06:07,826 -[Emma sniffs] -[baby cooing] 79 00:06:08,994 --> 00:06:10,787 -[Emma] Mmm. -[Kim] When a baby is born, 80 00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:12,497 a mother is also born. 81 00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:13,832 [baby snorting] 82 00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:15,501 She never existed before. 83 00:06:17,753 --> 00:06:22,341 The woman existed, but a mother is something absolutely new. 84 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:27,387 Mmm. I just wanna be the perfect mom. 85 00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:29,515 -[breathes deeply] -[sighs] 86 00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:31,600 [kisses] 87 00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:33,894 [Kim] You're his perfect mom. 88 00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,897 Well, I learned from the greatest. 89 00:06:38,357 --> 00:06:41,527 -[parent] ♪ I had a rooster ♪ -[television chatter] 90 00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:43,487 And she is spinning again. And… [speaks indistinctly] 91 00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:46,490 ♪ That rooster pleased me ♪ 92 00:06:48,951 --> 00:06:54,998 ♪ I held my rooster By the old willow tree ♪ 93 00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,083 -[sniffs] -Ow. 94 00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:57,501 Stop complaining. 95 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,671 [Emma] You know who I'm talking about. 96 00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:03,757 [baby cooing, crying] 97 00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:06,260 [Emma] ♪ I had a cat ♪ 98 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:09,429 ♪ My cat pleased me ♪ 99 00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:16,228 ♪ I held my cat By the old willow tree ♪ 100 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:23,986 [breathing heavily] 101 00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:24,903 [knocking] 102 00:07:30,534 --> 00:07:31,910 [knocking continues] 103 00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:37,249 [LaValle] After two months of little to no sleep, 104 00:07:37,833 --> 00:07:40,335 a person might suffer panic attacks, 105 00:07:40,419 --> 00:07:45,007 paranoia, and phobias no lullaby can soothe. 106 00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:46,842 [knocking] 107 00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:52,347 I don't understand. Where are the buttons? 108 00:07:52,431 --> 00:07:53,682 -[Apollo chuckles] -Oh! 109 00:07:54,433 --> 00:07:56,643 -Oh. There we are. -There he is. 110 00:07:56,727 --> 00:07:58,645 -It's a smartphone, Mom. -Oh. 111 00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:01,190 How's he sleeping? 112 00:08:01,899 --> 00:08:05,527 Ah, I read something that said he should be at six to nine hours. 113 00:08:05,611 --> 00:08:08,238 [sighs] I'll believe it when I sleep it. 114 00:08:08,322 --> 00:08:09,323 Hi. 115 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,408 -Hey. -Babe. 116 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:12,367 -What? -Ooh. Oh. 117 00:08:12,451 --> 00:08:14,369 -Hey, can you-- Sorry. I'm gonna-- -[Apollo] Oh, yeah. 118 00:08:14,453 --> 00:08:17,039 We're trying to limit the screen time. It's not good for him. 119 00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:18,207 A telephone? 120 00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:20,042 Yeah, he's just a little too young. 121 00:08:20,959 --> 00:08:24,087 He's too young for it. I'm too old for it. 122 00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:28,675 So instead, we'll spend the whole night playing games… 123 00:08:28,759 --> 00:08:31,303 -Uh-huh. [chuckles] -…and hugging. 124 00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:32,804 [Lillian] Nice. Ooh. 125 00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:33,889 [chuckles] 126 00:08:34,890 --> 00:08:37,351 So, where are we baptizing him? 127 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,477 Uh, we actually weren't-- 128 00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:42,606 Unless one is born of water and spirit, he cannot be saved. 129 00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:43,941 Saved from? 130 00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:46,527 The dark creatures of the world. 131 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,488 [sighs] Thanks, Mom. 132 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,281 Yeah, thank you, Mom. 133 00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:53,075 [exhales deeply] 134 00:08:54,660 --> 00:08:56,537 -Oh, wait. Right there. -[Emma kissing] 135 00:08:58,288 --> 00:09:01,458 -Oh, my God. [chuckles] -[chuckles] 136 00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:02,668 Thank you. 137 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,003 You're thanking me for a gift? 138 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,714 You are a gift. 139 00:09:07,798 --> 00:09:08,632 [people chattering] 140 00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:12,344 Mmm, I've missed you. Not you. The wine. 141 00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:14,429 -[Emma chuckles] Mmm. -[slurps] Mmm. 142 00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:18,016 [stammers] Oh, that's good. 143 00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,227 [Emma sighs] 144 00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:21,812 Can I just-- You just got a little-- 145 00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:23,939 -What? -A little-- Mmm. 146 00:09:24,815 --> 00:09:26,900 -There you go. Mm-hmm. -Thank you. 147 00:09:26,984 --> 00:09:28,735 [chuckles] 148 00:09:28,819 --> 00:09:30,946 So, what's happening with the appraisal? 149 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:33,323 That dude's slow. Slug turtle. 150 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,492 Think you can trust him? 151 00:09:35,576 --> 00:09:36,493 -Mmm… -'Cause you know, 152 00:09:36,577 --> 00:09:39,705 he's probably taking breaks every five minutes to jerk off 153 00:09:39,788 --> 00:09:44,668 to puppet porn… [chuckles, snorts] …or something. [chuckles] 154 00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,962 [both chuckle] 155 00:09:47,045 --> 00:09:48,213 There she is. 156 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:51,717 People tell you all about how you'll love your baby 157 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,428 more than you'll love anything in the world… [inhales] 158 00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:56,346 …which is true. 159 00:09:57,139 --> 00:10:00,267 But now you have this thing that you love so much, 160 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,728 you'll have to kill yourself if anything happens to it. 161 00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,188 They don't tell you that. 162 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:07,107 -Right. [stammers] -They don't say that. 163 00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:09,276 Everything's right except that part about killing yourself. 164 00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,278 Mmm. No. Mm-mmm. 165 00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:12,613 He dies, I die. 166 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,448 [smacks lips] Sorry, you're on your own. 167 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:17,534 -Okay, well, if you were gonna do that… -Mmm. Mm-hmm. 168 00:10:17,618 --> 00:10:18,452 …how would you do it? 169 00:10:20,162 --> 00:10:21,788 Jump off George Washington Bridge. 170 00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:24,124 -[chuckles] What? You? -[chuckles] 171 00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,417 Yes. Me. 172 00:10:25,501 --> 00:10:28,462 I would not have had you pegged for someone that would jump off a bridge. 173 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,130 -Why? Mmm. I want clean. -Sorry. It's something-- 174 00:10:30,214 --> 00:10:32,466 I just wanna… [inhales deeply, imitates crash] …plop. 175 00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,344 -You know? [chuckles] -[laughs] Belly flop. [chuckles] 176 00:10:35,427 --> 00:10:37,429 -[laughing] -[Emma laughing] Yeah. 177 00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:40,390 [clicks tongue] Hey, you wanna… 178 00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:44,186 Hey, you wanna do a thing? 179 00:10:59,284 --> 00:11:00,619 [Apollo] I'm so glad we went out. 180 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:07,334 You know, it really feels like we turned a corner. 181 00:11:11,296 --> 00:11:12,297 You know? 182 00:11:33,861 --> 00:11:35,821 [yawns] Handsome boy. 183 00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:38,115 Hey, I gotta get you right now. 184 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,658 Here. 185 00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:40,659 Boom! 186 00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:44,246 Oh, my God. Like father, like son, huh? [chuckles] Handsome. 187 00:11:44,746 --> 00:11:46,456 Hey, Shoji. [chuckles] 188 00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:48,709 -[chuckling] Hey, man. Good to see ya. -Hey. Say, "Hi." 189 00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:49,626 Good morning. 190 00:11:49,710 --> 00:11:50,794 -Hello. -Hey. 191 00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:51,712 Hey, Imogen. 192 00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:52,838 -Hey, how's Emma? -You see? 193 00:11:52,921 --> 00:11:55,257 -How's the breastfeeding? Yeah? -Oh, she's good. She's-- Tired. You know. 194 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,551 -We're trying, but we'll get there. -[baby crying] 195 00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:58,510 We'll get there. 196 00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:00,804 -Hey. -[Shoji's parent] Hey, look at your buddy. 197 00:12:00,888 --> 00:12:01,972 -Staring contest? -Ready? 198 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,223 -Yeah. Go. -Go. 199 00:12:04,975 --> 00:12:06,393 [both] Oh! 200 00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:07,644 [Apollo] Hey. 201 00:12:08,145 --> 00:12:09,897 -Hey, look at this. -It's your friend 202 00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:12,357 -who won the staring contest. -I know you. I know you. 203 00:12:12,441 --> 00:12:13,817 [chuckles] Say, "Hi." 204 00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:16,695 -[speaking indistinctly] -Nothing? 205 00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:18,071 -[speaking indistinctly] -[Apollo chuckles] 206 00:12:18,155 --> 00:12:20,866 -[Emma] Two months old today, bubba. -[sighing, grunts] 207 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:22,075 Two. 208 00:12:22,159 --> 00:12:24,453 -Two, two, two months. [chuckles] Wow. -[exhaling sharply] 209 00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:27,497 Hey. There's a new dad saying when we start him on solids… 210 00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:29,374 -Mmm. -…that we should use avocado. 211 00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:32,711 Because if we use the sweet stuff-- like bananas, fruit--, 212 00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:35,422 then all he's gonna want is sweet stuff. 213 00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:39,051 Will you just please make sure he doesn't get too cold today? 214 00:12:39,134 --> 00:12:40,135 -You know? -Yeah. 215 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,846 Oh, and coconut oil. 216 00:12:42,930 --> 00:12:43,972 Or too warm. 217 00:12:44,056 --> 00:12:45,724 It's supposed to be good for rashes. 218 00:12:47,518 --> 00:12:49,228 He's just so little. 219 00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:52,606 He needs me, Apollo. 220 00:12:52,689 --> 00:12:53,899 I know. We know. 221 00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:57,486 But we need your job and health insurance. 222 00:12:58,445 --> 00:13:00,989 [clicks tongue] Eight weeks maternity leave is criminal. 223 00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:02,783 It is. 224 00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:05,410 Look at him. 225 00:13:05,494 --> 00:13:07,621 -I know. -[whispers] He's just perfect. 226 00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:11,250 [breathes shakily] How will I breathe? 227 00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,044 [breathing shakily] 228 00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:17,172 -Through your mouth, silly. [chuckles] -[chuckles] 229 00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:21,510 [Apollo] Let's-- I'm gonna put you-- Sit you over-- here. 230 00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:25,097 Give you some cushioning here. 231 00:13:26,348 --> 00:13:28,475 All right, you'll be safe and sound. Talk to you soon. 232 00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:31,478 [sighs] 233 00:13:35,023 --> 00:13:38,443 [chuckles] Boom. All right, let's do this. 234 00:13:38,527 --> 00:13:39,528 [cell phone chimes] 235 00:13:45,659 --> 00:13:46,743 Oh. 236 00:13:53,125 --> 00:13:54,751 Hey, buddy. You good? 237 00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:56,587 Okay. 238 00:13:56,670 --> 00:13:58,088 [car honks] 239 00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:02,217 [cars honking] 240 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:10,100 [people chattering] 241 00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:30,495 Hello? 242 00:14:36,668 --> 00:14:39,213 I just had a baby, but cool. 243 00:14:40,172 --> 00:14:42,090 -[coworker 1] This is the loaf. -[coworker 2] Do we have everything? 244 00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:43,759 -[all speak indistinctly] -[coworker 2] Thank you. 245 00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:45,677 [coworker 1] Here, the halves-and-halves. 246 00:14:45,761 --> 00:14:46,970 -These look so good. -Hi. 247 00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:48,847 [all gasping, cheering] 248 00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:51,767 -Welcome back! [chuckling] -Welcome home, beautiful. Aw. 249 00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:53,393 [all cheering, laughing] 250 00:14:53,477 --> 00:14:55,145 -We missed you. -[coworker 1] Aw. 251 00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:57,481 -Thank you. Fuck. -[clicks tongue] Aw. 252 00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,983 -I'm clearly batshit now. [chuckles] -[all laughing] 253 00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:02,152 -You will never stop crying now. -No. 254 00:15:02,236 --> 00:15:03,529 -[cries, sighs] -Coffee and carrot cake. 255 00:15:03,612 --> 00:15:06,365 [coworker 3] We saw all the ones Apollo posted online, but we want more. 256 00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:08,367 -He sent me so many. You'll see. -Let me see. 257 00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:10,160 -Apollo took him to work today. So… -Aw. 258 00:15:10,244 --> 00:15:12,204 -[all gasp] Oh, my God. -Oh, no, stop it. 259 00:15:13,664 --> 00:15:14,665 [Apollo] Here we are. 260 00:15:16,667 --> 00:15:17,709 [Apollo] Okay. 261 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:20,879 [Apollo] Let's go book-hunting. 262 00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:29,096 I didn't have that much gear when I was fighting in Fallujah. 263 00:15:29,179 --> 00:15:31,181 Now I'm in my own little dirty war. 264 00:15:31,265 --> 00:15:32,683 [both chuckle] 265 00:15:32,766 --> 00:15:34,101 Whoa. Look at this. 266 00:15:34,852 --> 00:15:35,978 -Yeah. -Nice. 267 00:15:36,061 --> 00:15:38,146 Grandmother. Died four months ago. 268 00:15:38,230 --> 00:15:41,066 Get this. I asked to use the bathroom, and they said they didn't have one. 269 00:15:41,650 --> 00:15:43,402 Four bedroom house, no bathroom. 270 00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:44,570 -Imagine that. -Yeah. 271 00:15:44,653 --> 00:15:46,530 Well, you would think that'd be something you figure out 272 00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:48,448 -before you get the house, right? -You'd think. 273 00:15:48,532 --> 00:15:49,533 [Apollo] Uh-huh. 274 00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:53,662 -Well, looks like Grandma likes books. -Still haven't checked the basement. 275 00:15:54,580 --> 00:15:56,582 -Thought I'd, uh, leave something for you. -Oh. 276 00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:59,376 Uncle Patrice scared of a little dingy old basement. 277 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:00,878 We'll split whatever you find 60-40. 278 00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,796 Look me in my eye. 279 00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:06,216 Tell us what happened in Iskandariyah, Uncle Patrice. 280 00:16:06,925 --> 00:16:09,261 Tell your dad I said, "Fuck you." 281 00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:11,221 Oh. [chuckles] 282 00:16:11,763 --> 00:16:14,766 Can you say, "PTSD"? Huh? [singsongs] PTSD. 283 00:16:14,850 --> 00:16:16,393 I'm starting to understand why your pops abandoned you. 284 00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:19,479 -Oh, come on. [laughs] Low blow. -Ah. 285 00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:26,403 [breathes heavily] 286 00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:31,158 [whispering] 287 00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:43,337 -[exhales] Whoa! -[banging] 288 00:16:43,420 --> 00:16:44,796 [breathing heavily] Sorry. 289 00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:47,007 Oh, well. 290 00:16:47,841 --> 00:16:50,219 All right, the mystery of boxes. 291 00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,138 I've always loved it. 292 00:16:53,847 --> 00:16:55,641 That's 'cause you never know what's inside. 293 00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:56,808 What's that? 294 00:16:57,559 --> 00:17:01,271 Ah, you wanna hear a story about a box? I got one for ya. 295 00:17:02,439 --> 00:17:07,736 My father, your grandfather… [grunts] …his name was Brian West. 296 00:17:07,819 --> 00:17:09,279 You're actually named after him. 297 00:17:09,905 --> 00:17:14,660 When I turned 12, he left a box at my door. [chuckles] 298 00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:21,333 And inside that box were a pair of tickets to he and Grandma's first date, movies, 299 00:17:22,251 --> 00:17:26,046 a little children's book he read to me, and a bunch of other stuff. 300 00:17:26,630 --> 00:17:29,800 Yeah, I know. It was kind of like a time capsule. 301 00:17:34,471 --> 00:17:38,475 What's the name of the book? Well, since you asked so nicely, 302 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:41,937 To The Waters And The Wild. 303 00:17:42,980 --> 00:17:44,106 It's a good one. 304 00:17:49,820 --> 00:17:54,867 [both] "A baby is a dream made real. But dreams are the fairies' favorite meal. 305 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,537 There at the window, they watch as it sleeps. 306 00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:03,000 The child so beautiful, the fairies weep." 307 00:18:07,379 --> 00:18:11,758 Let's see what else we got here. [sighs, breathes sharply] 308 00:18:16,346 --> 00:18:18,599 Oh, looks just like more… 309 00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:33,614 [children chattering] 310 00:18:36,408 --> 00:18:37,409 [cell phone chimes] 311 00:18:54,301 --> 00:18:56,053 [chuckles] Hi. 312 00:18:56,136 --> 00:18:57,888 -Hi. -What you looking for? 313 00:18:58,722 --> 00:19:00,974 The Imaginaries. [smacks lips] Yep. 314 00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:11,777 [Emma] What the fuck? 315 00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:20,160 Where'd it go? [sighs] 316 00:19:35,467 --> 00:19:37,135 [Apollo] Oh! 317 00:19:37,761 --> 00:19:40,764 -Oh. [chuckles] -Apollo? What? 318 00:19:40,848 --> 00:19:42,474 -Oh! [chuckles] -What are you doing? 319 00:19:42,558 --> 00:19:44,142 Give him to me. What-- Hi. 320 00:19:44,226 --> 00:19:47,062 -Oh, my God. Yes, yes, yes, yes. -What is it? What? 321 00:19:47,145 --> 00:19:48,480 It looked like-- 322 00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,651 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Apollo, he's actually latching. 323 00:19:52,734 --> 00:19:56,113 -What a day. What a day. -[chuckles, gasps] 324 00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:57,197 Big boy. 325 00:19:59,449 --> 00:20:00,784 What? 326 00:20:03,829 --> 00:20:06,123 -[stutters] To Kill a Mockingbird. -That's right. 327 00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:08,584 A true first edition. 328 00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:11,879 Original cover. It's in pristine condition. Not a scratch. 329 00:20:11,962 --> 00:20:13,338 Nice find. 330 00:20:13,422 --> 00:20:18,218 Now, a book like that could get us, hmm, $10,000 or something. 331 00:20:19,178 --> 00:20:21,597 -Ten? [chuckles] No. What? -[chuckles] 332 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:24,141 But Harper Lee does not sign books. 333 00:20:24,766 --> 00:20:27,477 -Well, she signed this one. [chuckles] -[gasps] 334 00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:31,899 -Wait, who's Pip? -Childhood best friend. Prolific writer. 335 00:20:31,982 --> 00:20:34,318 A name that you've probably heard of. 336 00:20:35,861 --> 00:20:36,904 Truman Capote? 337 00:20:36,987 --> 00:20:38,697 -Boom! [chuckles] -What? 338 00:20:38,780 --> 00:20:40,490 Yes. Yeah. 339 00:20:40,574 --> 00:20:41,408 Oh, my God. 340 00:20:41,491 --> 00:20:43,702 That's not even the best part. Look at what she wrote to him. 341 00:20:43,785 --> 00:20:45,370 [Emma] "The daddy of our dreams." 342 00:20:45,454 --> 00:20:46,788 -[stammers, chuckles] -Yeah. 343 00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:50,584 -We can get an apartment. A place to live. -Yeah. 344 00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:53,212 Let's get an appraisal before we go into escrow. 345 00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:55,506 But yes, baby. 346 00:20:57,633 --> 00:20:59,968 You are the god, Apollo. 347 00:21:01,094 --> 00:21:03,722 -[sighs, grunts] -[chuckles] Look at him. 348 00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,599 -One more time. -[chuckles] 349 00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:09,061 -You are the god, Apollo. -Mmm. 350 00:21:09,144 --> 00:21:10,145 Mm-hmm. 351 00:21:11,021 --> 00:21:12,439 [Brian crying] 352 00:21:12,523 --> 00:21:16,735 [Emma sighs] I know. [shushing] 353 00:21:21,782 --> 00:21:23,367 [Brian continues crying] 354 00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:30,123 What's going on? [shushes, sighs] 355 00:21:30,999 --> 00:21:34,545 Hey, what's wrong? Hmm? 356 00:21:36,505 --> 00:21:37,840 [sighs] 357 00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:39,049 What's going on? Huh? 358 00:21:51,645 --> 00:21:52,646 [Apollo humming] 359 00:22:03,407 --> 00:22:04,491 [Apollo] Oh. There he is. 360 00:22:05,117 --> 00:22:06,910 I am so glad you brought the kid. 361 00:22:06,994 --> 00:22:08,203 [chuckles] 362 00:22:08,745 --> 00:22:10,205 You look like Master Blaster. 363 00:22:10,289 --> 00:22:13,417 Oh. Who runs Bartertown? 364 00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:16,044 Master Blaster runs Bartertown. 365 00:22:16,128 --> 00:22:17,254 [both chuckle] 366 00:22:17,337 --> 00:22:20,924 Although I feel like Brian and I are more similar to, um, 367 00:22:21,008 --> 00:22:22,342 Kuato and his brother. 368 00:22:22,426 --> 00:22:24,928 You really gonna compare your baby to motherfucking Kuato? 369 00:22:25,012 --> 00:22:29,433 The martians love Kuato, excuse me. He's like their George Washington. 370 00:22:30,309 --> 00:22:32,853 Or Martin Luther King. Oprah. [breathes sharply] 371 00:22:33,562 --> 00:22:34,938 You're a weird dude, my man. 372 00:22:35,022 --> 00:22:36,690 -Yeah. I know. -[Brian cooing] 373 00:22:37,941 --> 00:22:40,777 [sniffs, groans] Stinky butt. 374 00:22:43,739 --> 00:22:44,740 [sighs] 375 00:22:45,449 --> 00:22:48,535 [groaning] 376 00:22:48,619 --> 00:22:50,120 Here we go. 377 00:22:50,204 --> 00:22:52,748 Don't get used to this. I'm not doing it forever. 378 00:22:57,544 --> 00:22:58,545 Problem? 379 00:23:00,130 --> 00:23:03,258 [sighs] Apparently people have never seen a baby 380 00:23:03,342 --> 00:23:04,968 get their diaper changed before. 381 00:23:06,178 --> 00:23:09,348 [grunts] There you go, big boy. Okay. 382 00:23:11,099 --> 00:23:12,935 Did I tell you how happy I was you brought the kid? 383 00:23:14,686 --> 00:23:18,232 You know, you and Dana should really think about having a kid, just saying. 384 00:23:18,315 --> 00:23:19,942 Yeah, you might be right about that one. 385 00:23:20,025 --> 00:23:22,152 I mean, how else will I know the joy of walking around 386 00:23:22,236 --> 00:23:24,279 with a handful of warm human shit? 387 00:23:24,363 --> 00:23:26,448 -[chuckles] -[chuckles, clicks tongue] 388 00:23:26,532 --> 00:23:28,158 He's too young for that carrier. 389 00:23:28,242 --> 00:23:29,243 Huh? 390 00:23:29,326 --> 00:23:33,455 [chuckles] His legs splayed out like that could cause hip dysplasia. Yeah. 391 00:23:33,539 --> 00:23:36,250 Oh, okay. How old are yours? 392 00:23:36,333 --> 00:23:37,459 Hmm? 393 00:23:37,543 --> 00:23:40,212 -Your kids? -Oh, I don't have kids. [chuckles] 394 00:23:40,295 --> 00:23:42,422 -Oh. [chuckles] -[chuckling] 395 00:23:42,506 --> 00:23:44,925 -Call me when you do. [chuckles] -[chuckles] 396 00:23:45,008 --> 00:23:46,927 [chuckling] "Fuckoffy." 397 00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:48,846 -What? -[chuckles] 398 00:23:48,929 --> 00:23:49,930 Call him "fuckoffy." 399 00:23:50,013 --> 00:23:53,141 Well, it's just like regular coffee, only instead of sitting around, chatting, 400 00:23:53,225 --> 00:23:54,434 discussing brat-rearing, 401 00:23:54,518 --> 00:23:57,563 you simply have a hot cup of "shut the fuck up." 402 00:23:59,356 --> 00:24:00,816 [Apollo] Sounds good. I'm down. 403 00:24:00,899 --> 00:24:04,111 I could come around at 6:00-- Oh. 9:00? 404 00:24:04,611 --> 00:24:05,737 I-- I meant it. [stammers] 405 00:24:05,821 --> 00:24:07,281 Yeah. I don't know. 406 00:24:07,364 --> 00:24:08,991 -Not thirsty, apparently. Hmm. -I guess not. 407 00:24:09,074 --> 00:24:10,409 -Was it the way you said it? -It might be. 408 00:24:10,492 --> 00:24:13,287 -[chuckles] Thank you. -[chuckles] 409 00:24:13,370 --> 00:24:14,580 Yeah, you're welcome. 410 00:24:15,163 --> 00:24:16,874 Find anything good in that basement? 411 00:24:16,957 --> 00:24:19,168 [sighs] No, it was just a bust. 412 00:24:19,835 --> 00:24:22,212 I was looking for somewhere to thro-- 413 00:24:22,296 --> 00:24:25,924 You know what? Here. Just hold that for me. Yeah. [grunts] 414 00:24:26,884 --> 00:24:27,885 [Apollo] "Fuckoffy". 415 00:24:28,677 --> 00:24:32,431 -Guess I'll just put it with Grisham. -[Apollo] Who wants some fuckoffy? 416 00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:42,941 [sighs] 417 00:24:47,112 --> 00:24:48,113 [inhales sharply] 418 00:24:52,868 --> 00:24:54,328 I've forgotten something. 419 00:24:55,871 --> 00:24:58,874 [inhales deeply] I'm forgetting stuff. 420 00:24:58,957 --> 00:25:00,876 Mm-hmm. It's mommy brain. 421 00:25:01,543 --> 00:25:05,422 You will forget 20 things a day, remember five, then forget them again. 422 00:25:05,506 --> 00:25:06,423 Uh-huh. 423 00:25:06,507 --> 00:25:08,342 -I forgot my son once. -[chuckles] 424 00:25:08,425 --> 00:25:10,761 In his car seat, on the roof of the car. 425 00:25:10,844 --> 00:25:13,847 Went into the house, only remembered at dinner time. 426 00:25:14,890 --> 00:25:17,100 -[chuckles] What? -[chuckles] 427 00:25:17,184 --> 00:25:20,354 Yes, he was fine. He slept right through it. 428 00:25:20,437 --> 00:25:22,189 -Oh, good. [chuckles] -Yeah. 429 00:25:23,232 --> 00:25:25,817 You're okay. Carry on, my love. 430 00:25:25,901 --> 00:25:26,985 -Thank you. -Okay. 431 00:25:30,113 --> 00:25:31,114 [grunts] 432 00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:11,321 [chimes] 433 00:26:18,036 --> 00:26:19,037 [pants] 434 00:26:21,623 --> 00:26:22,791 What the fuck? 435 00:26:25,294 --> 00:26:26,712 [breathes shakily] 436 00:26:32,926 --> 00:26:33,927 [pedestrian] Excuse me. 437 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:54,865 [banging] 438 00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:04,041 Emma? 439 00:27:05,459 --> 00:27:07,878 Man, it's dark. Emma! 440 00:27:07,961 --> 00:27:08,962 [banging] 441 00:27:09,046 --> 00:27:10,672 [shushes] It's okay. 442 00:27:13,675 --> 00:27:15,552 -Emma. -[gasps] 443 00:27:15,636 --> 00:27:18,514 [sighs] It's you. [breathes deeply] 444 00:27:18,597 --> 00:27:19,806 What are you doing? 445 00:27:19,890 --> 00:27:22,684 I found this group for moms online. 446 00:27:23,727 --> 00:27:26,355 The Wise Moms. [chuckles] 447 00:27:26,438 --> 00:27:29,399 Uh, they said this was the best way to black out the room. 448 00:27:29,483 --> 00:27:32,486 Okay. I-- I thought we weren't sleep training yet. 449 00:27:32,569 --> 00:27:34,446 Why did you lie Brian down 450 00:27:34,530 --> 00:27:35,906 -on that driveway? -What? 451 00:27:36,490 --> 00:27:38,200 In the driveway, you laid him down. 452 00:27:38,283 --> 00:27:42,079 Oh… [stammers] …um, I was trying to do something, 453 00:27:42,162 --> 00:27:43,705 and he was strapped to me. So I put him down, 454 00:27:43,789 --> 00:27:45,040 just only for a few seconds. 455 00:27:45,123 --> 00:27:47,793 But-- But wait, how did you even know about that? 456 00:27:47,876 --> 00:27:50,629 Uh-- You sent me a picture and then deleted it. 457 00:27:52,297 --> 00:27:53,423 No, I didn't. 458 00:27:53,507 --> 00:27:54,716 [chuckles] What do you mean? 459 00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:57,553 You keep sending me pictures then deleting them. 460 00:27:57,636 --> 00:27:58,846 What are you-- 461 00:27:58,929 --> 00:28:02,140 Babe, I don't even think that that's possible on the phone. 462 00:28:03,016 --> 00:28:04,601 -[stammers] Are you okay? -[scoffs] 463 00:28:08,105 --> 00:28:08,939 Babe. 464 00:28:12,442 --> 00:28:15,821 Hey, hey, you never said hello to Brian. 465 00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:18,115 Here. 466 00:28:20,576 --> 00:28:21,410 [sighs] 467 00:28:21,493 --> 00:28:24,371 -Yeah, big boy. -Okay, but it's gone. 468 00:28:25,747 --> 00:28:28,166 -Can you look? It's gone. It's not here. -What-- 469 00:28:28,250 --> 00:28:30,752 [sighs] I don't know, baby. 470 00:28:34,798 --> 00:28:38,552 Well, maybe your phone's broken. We can get that fixed. It's easy. 471 00:28:39,136 --> 00:28:41,013 [Brian cooing] 472 00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,144 -Ow! [groans, breathes heavily] -What? 473 00:28:47,227 --> 00:28:49,730 -What? -Ow. [breathing heavily] 474 00:28:50,856 --> 00:28:52,024 [shakily] He bit me. 475 00:28:52,107 --> 00:28:54,776 No, he doesn't even have teeth. 476 00:28:54,860 --> 00:28:57,404 -You okay though? -[sighs] 477 00:28:57,487 --> 00:29:02,910 How would I know that you laid him on a driveway if you didn't send it? 478 00:29:04,912 --> 00:29:08,582 Who took it? Who took the photo? 479 00:29:09,374 --> 00:29:12,878 'Cause it was-- it was of the two of you from across the street. 480 00:29:15,339 --> 00:29:16,548 Baby, I don't know. 481 00:29:20,302 --> 00:29:25,557 Hi. Hey, bub. You're okay though. Hmm? 482 00:29:27,935 --> 00:29:29,353 [Apollo sighs] 483 00:29:29,436 --> 00:29:30,521 It's just weird. 484 00:29:32,481 --> 00:29:33,732 Mmm. So weird. 485 00:29:35,734 --> 00:29:36,735 Maybe I'm-- 486 00:29:38,237 --> 00:29:41,281 I'm so tired. Maybe I imagined it. 487 00:29:41,365 --> 00:29:44,326 The other day, I got in the shower with all my clothes on. 488 00:29:44,826 --> 00:29:45,827 Mmm. 489 00:29:45,911 --> 00:29:49,581 -Socks, shirt, beanie. -[chuckles] 490 00:29:49,665 --> 00:29:52,042 We're tired. [swallows] 491 00:29:54,878 --> 00:29:56,296 [stammers] 492 00:29:59,466 --> 00:30:00,551 Mmm. Thank you. 493 00:30:00,634 --> 00:30:01,635 Yeah. 494 00:30:07,558 --> 00:30:08,559 [sighs] 495 00:30:14,189 --> 00:30:16,650 [shushes, sighs] He's sleeping. 496 00:30:18,443 --> 00:30:19,444 [shushes] 497 00:30:20,487 --> 00:30:21,822 [Apollo] Think we should move him? 498 00:30:21,905 --> 00:30:23,490 [Emma] No, he'll be okay in here. 499 00:30:24,533 --> 00:30:25,450 [groans] 500 00:30:25,534 --> 00:30:27,870 [Apollo groans] Make way for the sandman. 501 00:30:27,953 --> 00:30:32,291 -[chuckles, groans] -[growling, sighs] 502 00:30:33,834 --> 00:30:35,711 [both sigh] 503 00:30:35,794 --> 00:30:38,589 This is the furthest we've slept from him since he was born. 504 00:30:38,672 --> 00:30:42,384 [breathes deeply] Mmm. Mm-hmm. 505 00:30:44,386 --> 00:30:45,387 [Emma] Mmm. 506 00:30:51,643 --> 00:30:55,480 -[breathes deeply, sighs] -[sighing] 507 00:31:02,070 --> 00:31:04,823 [in Portuguese] Be careful what you wish for Emma. 508 00:31:04,907 --> 00:31:06,783 [echoing laugh] 509 00:31:16,710 --> 00:31:18,212 [Brian crying] 510 00:31:20,964 --> 00:31:21,965 [cell phone chimes] 511 00:31:33,602 --> 00:31:35,771 -[Brian cooing] -[Emma, in English] Come on. 512 00:31:35,854 --> 00:31:38,732 [breathing heavily] 513 00:31:38,815 --> 00:31:39,858 [shushes] 514 00:31:46,323 --> 00:31:47,324 Apollo! 515 00:31:48,075 --> 00:31:50,827 Apollo. Apollo, look. Look. [breathes sharply] 516 00:31:50,911 --> 00:31:52,663 -Okay, baby, I see it. It's-- -Yeah? 517 00:31:52,746 --> 00:31:55,290 It's 4 a.m. He needs to eat? [groans, sighs] 518 00:31:55,374 --> 00:31:59,920 No. No, Apollo, just look. It's there. Look at it. [breathing heavily] 519 00:32:00,921 --> 00:32:03,173 -There's nothing on there, baby. -Yes, there is. 520 00:32:03,257 --> 00:32:05,133 There's a photo that I just saw. 521 00:32:05,634 --> 00:32:08,720 -Here, I'll take him. -What? There wa-- There was a photo. 522 00:32:08,804 --> 00:32:11,306 [grunts] There you go. It's just your diaper. 523 00:32:11,390 --> 00:32:13,767 You're fine. [inhales deeply] 524 00:32:13,851 --> 00:32:14,893 What the fuck? 525 00:32:15,477 --> 00:32:19,690 -It's okay. It's okay, big boy. -[Brian crying] 526 00:32:19,773 --> 00:32:22,150 -Where is it? [breathing heavily] -You're okay. 527 00:32:22,234 --> 00:32:24,403 -[crying continues] -It's okay. 528 00:32:37,708 --> 00:32:39,710 [Brian crying] 529 00:32:46,633 --> 00:32:47,634 [sighs] 530 00:32:49,094 --> 00:32:50,262 [cell phone chimes] 531 00:33:03,108 --> 00:33:05,444 [LaValle] After six months of inability to sleep 532 00:33:05,527 --> 00:33:09,823 comes mania, delusion, rapid weight loss. 533 00:33:09,907 --> 00:33:11,033 Sleep, child. 534 00:33:11,116 --> 00:33:16,079 Oh, if only would and could close those teary wearies. 535 00:33:18,498 --> 00:33:20,292 [medical receptionist, distorted] Brian Kagwa? 536 00:33:21,710 --> 00:33:23,420 Brian Kagwa? 537 00:33:23,504 --> 00:33:24,588 [child] My giraffe! 538 00:33:27,799 --> 00:33:29,343 He's enchanting. [chuckles] 539 00:33:30,594 --> 00:33:32,054 How's he sleeping? 540 00:33:35,474 --> 00:33:36,767 -[Brian screams] -[gasps] 541 00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:38,602 -Doesn't. -[doctor] Hmm. 542 00:33:38,685 --> 00:33:39,937 How's he feeding? 543 00:33:41,688 --> 00:33:45,692 Well, the-- the baby wouldn't latch in the beginning. 544 00:33:45,776 --> 00:33:46,652 [doctor] Mm-hmm. 545 00:33:46,735 --> 00:33:51,114 Um… [stammers] …then he just totally changed. 546 00:33:51,698 --> 00:33:52,699 [doctor] Hmm? 547 00:33:53,450 --> 00:33:54,743 Now he's ravenous. 548 00:33:54,826 --> 00:33:56,453 Oh, that's great. 549 00:33:58,705 --> 00:33:59,706 He bit me. 550 00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:05,671 Okay, I don't think-- Let me see. 551 00:34:07,381 --> 00:34:09,257 Nope. No teeth. 552 00:34:09,967 --> 00:34:12,386 So, Emma, what are your concerns? 553 00:34:12,928 --> 00:34:16,639 [clicks tongue] Um, well, there's a few of them. 554 00:34:17,139 --> 00:34:20,978 Um… [stammers] …can't quite explain. 555 00:34:21,061 --> 00:34:27,609 [sniffs] But mostly I-- I just wanna make sure that he's normal. 556 00:34:28,193 --> 00:34:30,027 Oh, yes. He's perfectly normal. 557 00:34:32,281 --> 00:34:33,991 Emma, how's your mood been? 558 00:34:36,034 --> 00:34:39,036 I-- [stammers] I don't know. Fine. 559 00:34:40,746 --> 00:34:42,623 -Don't you dare. -[Brian crying] 560 00:34:45,002 --> 00:34:46,003 [Brian screaming] 561 00:34:46,085 --> 00:34:50,174 [scoffs] You little fucker. You little fucking fucker. [pants] 562 00:34:52,967 --> 00:34:55,929 Have you had any thoughts about hurting yourself? 563 00:34:56,889 --> 00:34:58,473 -[stammers] -Or the baby? 564 00:34:58,557 --> 00:34:59,850 [chuckles] 565 00:35:01,894 --> 00:35:04,188 What are we gonna do, baby? Hmm? Hmm? 566 00:35:04,271 --> 00:35:06,398 What are we gonna do? Because we can't go on like this. 567 00:35:06,481 --> 00:35:08,567 Okay? Huh? 568 00:35:08,650 --> 00:35:12,154 We both know something's not right, don't we? So what's it gonna be? 569 00:35:12,237 --> 00:35:13,322 What is your suggestion? 570 00:35:13,405 --> 00:35:14,865 Because one of us is gonna have to change it up. 571 00:35:14,948 --> 00:35:19,786 One of us is going to have to give it up. So tell me right now, what is it gonna be? 572 00:35:19,870 --> 00:35:21,246 Fuck off. 573 00:35:21,330 --> 00:35:23,332 Oh, fuck. You're the real devil, aren't you? 574 00:35:23,415 --> 00:35:25,751 That's what I fucking thought. Get out of my way. 575 00:35:26,919 --> 00:35:28,504 -[car horn honks] -[person] It's not a baby! 576 00:35:28,587 --> 00:35:29,505 [screams] 577 00:35:29,588 --> 00:35:31,548 -[person] It's not a baby! -Look, we're all screaming now. 578 00:35:31,632 --> 00:35:34,176 -Are you fucking happy? -It's not a baby! 579 00:35:34,259 --> 00:35:35,511 [Brian crying] 580 00:35:35,594 --> 00:35:37,763 [Apollo] Emma. Where'd you go? 581 00:35:38,555 --> 00:35:40,390 [Emma] I took the baby for a walk. 582 00:35:40,474 --> 00:35:42,100 -Thought it might calm him down. -Okay, okay, okay, okay. 583 00:35:42,184 --> 00:35:44,978 -It didn't. Three, two, one. -I got you. It's okay. 584 00:35:45,062 --> 00:35:47,314 [sighs] Motherfucker. 585 00:35:47,397 --> 00:35:51,109 -Emma! Don't-- Goddamn it. -He's an asshole! 586 00:35:51,193 --> 00:35:53,445 -[sighs] She doesn't mean that, okay? -Oh, yes I do. 587 00:35:53,529 --> 00:35:55,447 -He's the devil! -She doesn't mean it. She-- Okay? 588 00:35:55,531 --> 00:35:56,532 [cell phone buzzes] 589 00:35:59,535 --> 00:36:00,536 Hello. 590 00:36:03,372 --> 00:36:05,374 [breathing heavily] 591 00:36:07,876 --> 00:36:08,877 [cell phone chimes] 592 00:36:15,592 --> 00:36:17,594 [laughing] 593 00:36:23,725 --> 00:36:25,811 [laughing continues] 594 00:36:31,567 --> 00:36:32,818 [Apollo] What's funny, Emma? 595 00:36:36,488 --> 00:36:37,489 Nothing. 596 00:36:39,700 --> 00:36:40,701 [Apollo] Okay. 597 00:36:41,451 --> 00:36:43,370 Um, that was Dr. Calero. 598 00:36:43,453 --> 00:36:46,164 She said that you brought Brian to see her earlier. 599 00:36:48,876 --> 00:36:51,461 Well, she's worried about you. 600 00:36:52,963 --> 00:36:54,131 And Brian. 601 00:36:57,009 --> 00:36:58,010 That's sweet. 602 00:37:00,053 --> 00:37:02,764 Yeah, and I'm worried too. 603 00:37:03,891 --> 00:37:07,477 Okay? [stammers] I think you should see a doctor. 604 00:37:11,356 --> 00:37:12,566 [smacks lips] Yeah. 605 00:37:15,694 --> 00:37:17,196 I know that's what you think. 606 00:37:22,075 --> 00:37:26,163 I know n-- no one's gonna believe me. 607 00:37:28,373 --> 00:37:30,209 I know that now. Um… 608 00:37:31,793 --> 00:37:32,794 So… 609 00:37:35,547 --> 00:37:36,548 I'll go. 610 00:37:38,509 --> 00:37:39,760 Okay. 611 00:37:39,843 --> 00:37:42,638 Do you think we can afford it if, um… 612 00:37:42,721 --> 00:37:44,598 -Yeah, it's okay. -…if they're gonna prescribe me something? 613 00:37:44,681 --> 00:37:48,602 We'll figure it out. All right? We'll figure it all out. 614 00:37:54,858 --> 00:37:56,902 [sniffles, sighs] 615 00:38:01,615 --> 00:38:02,616 Thank you. 616 00:38:04,284 --> 00:38:09,081 I do love you, Apollo. And the baby. 617 00:38:09,581 --> 00:38:10,999 Yeah, and Brian. 618 00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:13,085 Yeah. 619 00:38:16,171 --> 00:38:20,050 I, um… [cries] 620 00:38:20,133 --> 00:38:24,304 I just need to find my way back to myself. 621 00:38:25,305 --> 00:38:28,767 -That's all. Then I'll be okay. -I know. I know. I know. 622 00:38:28,851 --> 00:38:32,020 -Then we'll be okay. [crying] -Hey. 623 00:38:32,104 --> 00:38:37,818 I'm gonna support you always. Look at me. Always. 624 00:38:44,408 --> 00:38:48,120 [breathes heavily, sobbing] 625 00:38:52,165 --> 00:38:54,126 [Apollo sighs] 626 00:38:59,214 --> 00:39:00,215 [Emma] Cal sent me. 627 00:39:02,259 --> 00:39:03,635 I hope these are useful. 628 00:39:06,346 --> 00:39:07,556 -[gasps] -[chains rattle] 629 00:39:08,265 --> 00:39:09,766 -[locks clicking] -[Emma pants] 630 00:39:09,850 --> 00:39:12,269 What the hell is in there? Emma? 631 00:39:14,563 --> 00:39:16,481 -[both grunting, breathing heavily] -[chains rattling] 632 00:39:18,609 --> 00:39:21,236 Chains. Chains? 633 00:39:22,362 --> 00:39:25,324 Emma. Emma. 634 00:39:35,209 --> 00:39:37,336 April 14th, 1990. 635 00:39:37,961 --> 00:39:38,962 [Emma grunts] 636 00:39:41,507 --> 00:39:42,925 You don't remember that day? 637 00:39:44,301 --> 00:39:45,886 I remember what you've told me. 638 00:39:46,970 --> 00:39:47,971 Which is? 639 00:39:48,555 --> 00:39:50,182 I don't wanna play this game. 640 00:39:50,724 --> 00:39:51,725 What? 641 00:39:56,647 --> 00:40:01,652 You and me came back from school, and the trucks were already there. 642 00:40:04,029 --> 00:40:05,405 The house was on fire. 643 00:40:08,992 --> 00:40:14,248 Mom and Dad were stuck inside, and the firemen took us to the hospital. 644 00:40:16,542 --> 00:40:18,460 Still don't get why they took us to the hospital. 645 00:40:18,544 --> 00:40:19,670 That's what I told you, yes. 646 00:40:19,753 --> 00:40:21,588 But now I'm gonna tell you what really happened. 647 00:40:31,849 --> 00:40:35,352 [Kim] Mom told us we could skip school and stay home. 648 00:40:36,728 --> 00:40:38,814 We ate Cap'n Crunch and watched TV. 649 00:40:40,691 --> 00:40:42,568 Watched TV and ate Cap'n Crunch. 650 00:40:43,986 --> 00:40:45,279 Then Daddy got home. 651 00:40:46,321 --> 00:40:47,865 [sighs] Why aren't the kids at school? 652 00:40:49,199 --> 00:40:50,576 I want them close. 653 00:40:50,659 --> 00:40:52,703 [parent 2] I just got off the night shift. I need some sleep. 654 00:40:52,786 --> 00:40:54,037 I don't want them here making noise. 655 00:40:54,121 --> 00:40:55,664 I need them close! 656 00:40:56,290 --> 00:40:57,291 You're crazy. 657 00:41:03,547 --> 00:41:05,132 Baby, let me do your hair. 658 00:41:09,303 --> 00:41:10,679 That was my hair. 659 00:41:10,762 --> 00:41:14,516 ♪ I had a rooster ♪ 660 00:41:15,267 --> 00:41:16,268 No. 661 00:41:16,935 --> 00:41:20,439 ♪ I had a rooster ♪ 662 00:41:21,190 --> 00:41:24,067 ♪ That rooster pleased me ♪ 663 00:41:24,151 --> 00:41:25,152 Ow. 664 00:41:25,736 --> 00:41:26,904 Stop complaining. 665 00:41:29,114 --> 00:41:30,157 I don't remember that. 666 00:41:32,326 --> 00:41:33,327 [sighs] 667 00:41:38,290 --> 00:41:40,000 I knew the day was all wrong. 668 00:41:42,878 --> 00:41:44,880 Hey, hey. Wake up, wake up. House is on fire. 669 00:41:44,963 --> 00:41:46,465 We gotta go. Come on! We gotta go. 670 00:41:46,548 --> 00:41:48,008 Come on. Let's go, let's go, let's go. 671 00:41:49,426 --> 00:41:50,677 We were in the house? 672 00:41:53,597 --> 00:41:55,265 Did Dad try to carry Mom too? 673 00:41:56,350 --> 00:41:58,352 Mom set the goddamn fire. 674 00:41:59,728 --> 00:42:01,772 Come on, come on, come on. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. 675 00:42:01,855 --> 00:42:03,065 -No! -Whoa. whoa. Let her go! 676 00:42:03,148 --> 00:42:04,149 I can't leave you orphans. 677 00:42:05,943 --> 00:42:07,861 We should all go together. 678 00:42:08,362 --> 00:42:11,365 And you look at Mom, and you say three words. 679 00:42:13,784 --> 00:42:16,370 Let me go. 680 00:42:19,998 --> 00:42:22,125 [crying] Please. 681 00:42:22,209 --> 00:42:23,418 [cries] 682 00:42:29,299 --> 00:42:30,300 [cries] 683 00:42:36,807 --> 00:42:41,270 But he dies in the fire. Right? 684 00:43:07,629 --> 00:43:11,341 They took us to the hospital to treat us for smoke inhalation. 685 00:43:12,801 --> 00:43:17,472 We were there five days and then foster care till I turned 18. 686 00:43:20,851 --> 00:43:23,312 [Emma] Why wouldn't you tell me any of this before? 687 00:43:23,395 --> 00:43:25,022 Why did you change your mind? 688 00:43:30,402 --> 00:43:33,739 Because you've got the same look on your face that Mom had that morning. 689 00:43:41,371 --> 00:43:44,499 Sometimes I look at Brian and I don't think he's my son. 690 00:43:47,586 --> 00:43:49,338 Maybe it's his eyes. 691 00:43:52,257 --> 00:43:55,636 Or… [sniffles] …I don't know. 692 00:43:58,180 --> 00:44:02,768 Because he looks like Brian, 693 00:44:03,769 --> 00:44:08,440 but it's like he's someone else's son. 694 00:44:09,900 --> 00:44:12,569 Emma, you're exhausted. 695 00:44:12,653 --> 00:44:14,863 You had to go back to work way too soon. 696 00:44:15,697 --> 00:44:17,533 And when you were just a baby, 697 00:44:17,616 --> 00:44:20,536 your mother and father were taken from you. 698 00:44:20,619 --> 00:44:23,664 It doesn't surprise me at all that you might be worried 699 00:44:23,747 --> 00:44:29,378 that you're gonna lose the person you love most in the whole world. 700 00:44:30,879 --> 00:44:32,089 [sniffles] 701 00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:55,362 [LaValle] By end of month six, 702 00:44:55,445 --> 00:44:59,199 hallucinations and panic attacks become more pronounced. 703 00:45:01,159 --> 00:45:03,871 The person becomes unresponsive or mute. 704 00:45:04,371 --> 00:45:06,456 This is the final progression. 705 00:45:14,423 --> 00:45:20,554 [whispers] Oh, there you go, big boy. Come on. Mmm. Yummy, yummy, yummy. 706 00:45:20,637 --> 00:45:21,638 Morning. 707 00:45:22,890 --> 00:45:24,183 Morning, Mommy. 708 00:45:25,809 --> 00:45:26,810 [Brian] Dada. 709 00:45:27,936 --> 00:45:30,439 What? Oh, my God. Okay. 710 00:45:31,023 --> 00:45:34,359 Wait, say that again. Do it again. Do it again. Do it. Say it again. 711 00:45:34,443 --> 00:45:37,446 Hold on, hold on, hold on. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Come on. 712 00:45:37,529 --> 00:45:38,572 Dada. 713 00:45:38,655 --> 00:45:41,658 [laughing] 714 00:45:41,742 --> 00:45:45,621 Yes. Okay. Oh, you're gonna be Internet famous. 715 00:45:46,205 --> 00:45:49,041 Oh, my God. That is amazing. 716 00:45:49,958 --> 00:45:52,920 So, the, uh, appraisal, um, guy I was talk-- 717 00:45:53,003 --> 00:45:54,755 I wanna get the baby baptized. 718 00:45:58,133 --> 00:46:00,135 Brian. She's talking about you, Brian. 719 00:46:01,512 --> 00:46:04,932 Ooh, that's a big boy. [laughs] 720 00:46:05,015 --> 00:46:06,850 Your mother has been asking ever since he was born. 721 00:46:06,934 --> 00:46:08,310 I thought we should finally do it. 722 00:46:08,393 --> 00:46:09,394 [Apollo] Good job. 723 00:46:10,103 --> 00:46:11,855 His appetite is getting amazing. 724 00:46:12,481 --> 00:46:13,941 He's eating more than me now. 725 00:46:14,024 --> 00:46:16,860 I made an appointment at the church around the corner. 726 00:46:16,944 --> 00:46:20,864 Holyrood. Father Hagen. Seems nice. 727 00:46:22,866 --> 00:46:23,700 When? 728 00:46:24,368 --> 00:46:25,827 Today, in an hour. 729 00:46:27,162 --> 00:46:28,163 Wow. 730 00:46:29,164 --> 00:46:32,918 Okay. Glad you decided to include me in that. 731 00:46:33,001 --> 00:46:35,128 You don't have to be there. I can take him on my own. 732 00:46:35,212 --> 00:46:36,129 What are you talking about? 733 00:46:36,213 --> 00:46:38,090 You're not going anywhere with my son without me. 734 00:46:40,884 --> 00:46:45,222 [sighs] Emma, why is your phone in the garbage? 735 00:46:46,348 --> 00:46:49,184 -I got another text last night. -Okay. 736 00:46:49,268 --> 00:46:50,561 -A photo of you and the baby… -Sure. 737 00:46:50,644 --> 00:46:51,645 …in the Zipcar. 738 00:46:52,563 --> 00:46:54,398 He was in the car seat. 739 00:46:54,481 --> 00:46:57,109 Photo was taken through the window, 740 00:46:58,068 --> 00:47:00,112 like someone crept right up next to the baby. I don't-- 741 00:47:00,195 --> 00:47:01,613 -Brian! -[gasps] 742 00:47:01,697 --> 00:47:03,073 -His name's Brian. -[Brian crying] 743 00:47:04,825 --> 00:47:08,245 [sighs] I'm sorry, baby. I know. I know. 744 00:47:08,328 --> 00:47:10,372 That was loud. That was loud. 745 00:47:16,795 --> 00:47:17,796 "Got him." 746 00:47:19,006 --> 00:47:20,007 What? 747 00:47:21,258 --> 00:47:22,593 That's what the text said. 748 00:47:23,635 --> 00:47:27,556 Right under his picture, in caps. "Got him." 749 00:47:28,140 --> 00:47:30,142 Show me. Show me a photo. Show me where it says that. 750 00:47:30,225 --> 00:47:31,977 -They're gone. You already know that. -Show me at least one text that says-- 751 00:47:32,060 --> 00:47:33,604 -They're gone. -Because it never happened. 752 00:47:33,687 --> 00:47:35,022 Let's just go. Let's get ready. 753 00:47:35,105 --> 00:47:36,982 We're not going to church with you, Emma. 754 00:47:37,649 --> 00:47:40,360 You probably want to get him an exorcism rather than a baptism. 755 00:47:41,445 --> 00:47:44,072 The message board said we can try therapy or church, and we can-- 756 00:47:44,156 --> 00:47:45,991 Well, I'm delighted you think a bunch of old women can tell us 757 00:47:46,074 --> 00:47:47,993 how to live our lives and raise our kid. 758 00:47:48,577 --> 00:47:50,037 But you know what the problem is, Emma? 759 00:47:50,120 --> 00:47:53,332 You know what it really is? It's you. You're the fucking problem, all right? 760 00:47:53,415 --> 00:47:55,292 Why don't you go take another pill or something? 761 00:48:05,511 --> 00:48:06,512 Where you going? 762 00:48:27,449 --> 00:48:28,659 You don't see. 763 00:48:30,827 --> 00:48:31,828 But you will. 764 00:48:47,678 --> 00:48:52,349 Hey. No matter what happens, you're coming with me. 765 00:48:56,937 --> 00:48:59,731 [LaValle] "Who has disturbed me?" says the house god. 766 00:49:01,024 --> 00:49:05,112 It is the baby who has disturbed you. The baby has scared you. 767 00:49:07,906 --> 00:49:13,328 Making noises like a drunkard who cannot sit still on his stool. 768 00:49:14,496 --> 00:49:16,790 He has disturbed your sleep. 769 00:49:20,002 --> 00:49:23,380 "Call the baby now," says the house god. 770 00:49:25,507 --> 00:49:26,800 God, forgive me. 771 00:49:34,558 --> 00:49:36,101 [Brian crying]