1
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:25,817
奶奶!

2
00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:27,610
抱歉,泰勒寶貝

3
00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:30,613
你的鬧鐘響了

4
00:00:30,780 --> 00:00:33,533
你的尖叫聲嚇到我假牙都噴出來了

5
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:39,122
有奶奶回來一起住
真是我金孫的福氣

6
00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:40,790
否則他上班就要遲到了

7
00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:42,167
- 沒錯,會遲到
- 糟糕

8
00:00:44,252 --> 00:00:46,379
你要記得轉身,寶貝

9
00:00:50,967 --> 00:00:55,722
(約會用)
(早上用)

10
00:00:56,681 --> 00:00:58,475
嘿!你在笑我嗎?

11
00:00:58,600 --> 00:00:59,768
你在笑我嗎?

12
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:03,396
我要用笑聲為這城市供電
所以你最好笑出來

13
00:01:03,605 --> 00:01:05,607
圖斯克蒙家的早晨特餐

14
00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:07,942
特黏的黏莓鬆餅

15
00:01:07,942 --> 00:01:09,069
謝了,媽

16
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:12,113
伯納,你在樓下開了一間五金行

17
00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:15,950
你何時才要做點貢獻
為泰勒調整家裡的門框?

18
00:01:15,950 --> 00:01:19,287
這個屋子對潛力無窮的他來說太窄小了

19
00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:21,790
看看這對威風的角

20
00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:23,500
我要有這樣的兒子就好了

21
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:24,876
(怪獸公司來不來電?)

22
00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:25,960
媽,我就在這裡

23
00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:28,046
倒數三、二、一...

24
00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:30,465
早安,圖斯克蒙一家

25
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:31,758
早安,薇兒

26
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:34,928
- 兒子,我有一個新笑話
- 這就免了吧

27
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:37,347
海怪都吃什麼當晚餐?

28
00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:40,391
- 拜託別講了...
- 鮮魚「舟」

29
00:01:41,309 --> 00:01:42,393
真好笑,泰爸

30
00:01:42,393 --> 00:01:44,729
你工作時可以講這個,泰泰

31
00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:46,022
不太好吧

32
00:01:46,022 --> 00:01:48,733
- 走吧
- 我真搞不懂這些笑話

33
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:51,653
我們以前啊,只要嚇嚇人類小孩就好

34
00:01:51,653 --> 00:01:52,737
那樣不好嗎?

35
00:01:52,737 --> 00:01:55,406
圖斯克蒙奶奶,我知道改變很可怕

36
00:01:55,406 --> 00:01:57,367
就像是妳從養老院搬出來的過程

37
00:01:57,367 --> 00:01:59,244
- 是被趕出來吧
- 搬回到這裡

38
00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:01,579
- 但一切很順利啊
- 才沒有

39
00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:03,373
我每天都好想念嘎吱安養院

40
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:06,209
我水上韻律操班上
全是太太過世的男人

41
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,711
別再提妳的泳池約會圈了

42
00:02:08,711 --> 00:02:12,257
其實呢,笑聲電力
能量比尖叫電力還要強十倍

43
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,842
是能讓我們進步的能源

44
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,468
沒錯,我們追求歡笑

45
00:02:16,177 --> 00:02:17,637
快秀一下你的拿手絕活

46
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,268
我還是不懂

47
00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:45,248
《怪獸職場求生記》

48
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:58,178
(《我尖叫,你尖叫》)

49
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,221
早安,怪獸城市的市民

50
00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:02,557
- 歡迎收看《我尖叫...
- 你尖叫》

51
00:03:02,557 --> 00:03:05,059
我們會針對時事議題進行辯論

52
00:03:05,059 --> 00:03:07,145
- 沒錯,我是傑克
- 我是吉兒

53
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:09,314
我今天要讓傑克顏面掃地

54
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:11,107
他在我們家裡都不掃地

55
00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:13,735
妳如果要我掃地,就在分配表上寫啊!

56
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:16,779
傑克,九個月前怪獸公司

57
00:03:16,779 --> 00:03:20,283
可恥的執行長亨利荷特路被捕

58
00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:24,078
因為他計畫對人類小孩
使用尖叫抽取器

59
00:03:24,078 --> 00:03:26,206
天啊,吉兒,雖然我們是怪獸

60
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,249
但我們不是禽獸

61
00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:31,502
事發之後,這間電力公司
就捨棄尖叫,改用笑聲發電

62
00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:34,422
{\an8}今天的議題是笑聲電力
那是個笑柄嗎?

63
00:03:34,422 --> 00:03:35,924
{\an8}- 不是
- 我覺得就是

64
00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:38,092
而且還不好笑,我笑不出來

65
00:03:38,092 --> 00:03:42,138
因為妳那一側的身體連笑穴都沒有

66
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,808
我的身體或許離不開傑克

67
00:03:45,808 --> 00:03:48,061
但我的心是屬於驚嚇能源的

68
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,938
- 幸好有驚嚇達人公司
- 哼

69
00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:52,190
尖叫實業以及恐懼公司

70
00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:56,194
勇敢堅持著
怪獸城市光榮的驚嚇傳統

71
00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:57,570
別扯傳統了

72
00:03:57,695 --> 00:04:00,573
科學研究顯示,笑聲的能量更強

73
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:03,701
不久之後,尖叫能源
就會跟我們的諮商療程一樣沒用

74
00:04:03,701 --> 00:04:06,496
因為你老是在講你的感受

75
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:09,415
那就是諮商的重點啊!

76
00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:10,792
我要打給獠柏心理師了

77
00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,043
我的舒壓球呢?

78
00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:13,628
- 跟你一樣的...
- 去哪裡了?

79
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:15,129
還有怪獸公司的現任執行長

80
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:18,549
詹姆士蘇利文以及「麥克滑稽」

81
00:04:18,549 --> 00:04:20,551
你們都無法說服我接受改變

82
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,763
什麼?你受過這樣的
奇恥大辱嗎,毛怪?

83
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:26,140
至少他們談論到了笑聲電力

84
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,059
「麥克滑稽」?

85
00:04:28,059 --> 00:04:29,269
我有滑稽嗎?

86
00:04:30,144 --> 00:04:31,145
有一點吧

87
00:04:31,145 --> 00:04:32,939
我要打去投訴,叫他們刊誤

88
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:36,442
還要他們道歉撤播,並向上天懺悔

89
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,903
我們的新助理在哪裡?卡麥隆!

90
00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,447
幫我打給傑克跟吉兒

91
00:04:42,198 --> 00:04:44,117
我要好好教訓他們一頓

92
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,286
或許不只一頓,要教訓好幾頓

93
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:47,954
怪獸新聞網您好

94
00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:49,038
- 喂?
- 請稍候

95
00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:51,958
她叫我稍候?豈有此理

96
00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:54,794
- 真是奇恥大辱
- 冷靜點,大眼仔

97
00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:56,963
小心氣到眼睛爆出血絲

98
00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:59,424
無論是電視台,或是怪獸城市的大家

99
00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:00,925
都會慢慢接受笑聲電力的

100
00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,510
這是正確的方向

101
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:03,428
怪獸新聞網您好...

102
00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,054
- 終於,我是麥...
- 請稍候

103
00:05:05,054 --> 00:05:06,139
又要我稍候?

104
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,349
別氣了,再說公司營運得很好

105
00:05:08,349 --> 00:05:09,726
歡笑專員收穫滿滿

106
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:11,185
一切都很順利

107
00:05:15,064 --> 00:05:16,149
各位歡笑專員

108
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:17,525
傳送門準備就緒

109
00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:20,653
- 好耶
- 加油,泰勒

110
00:05:20,778 --> 00:05:23,031
- 裝滿這個能量瓶
- 出動

111
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,589
妳好

112
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:51,392
成功了

113
00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:52,810
你好

114
00:06:00,943 --> 00:06:01,944
很好,痰痰

115
00:06:02,945 --> 00:06:04,864
- 幹得好,藍基
- 讚啦

116
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:14,999
天啊...

117
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:19,420
你好,這些甜甜圈是誰點的?

118
00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,299
嗨,泰勒

119
00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,801
你怎麼了嗎,小子?

120
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,719
你不喜歡我的甜甜圈段子嗎?

121
00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:29,764
那是很好笑,但你上週表演過了

122
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:31,849
是嗎?那麼...

123
00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:34,685
我還有一個還在實驗中的段子...

124
00:06:35,269 --> 00:06:38,898
你好,我是一個獲得生命的小甜甜圈...

125
00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:42,318
又是這個奇怪的娃娃音...

126
00:06:42,318 --> 00:06:44,404
這個你也聽過了嗎?

127
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,990
好吧,這一點小挫折打不倒我的

128
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:49,450
一切都很順利

129
00:06:49,575 --> 00:06:50,576
其實呢...

130
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,412
今天是我的一個大日子

131
00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:55,832
{\an8}我今天要回母校
在返校日球賽上接受讚揚

132
00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:56,916
所以...

133
00:06:56,916 --> 00:06:58,793
你的床不太堅固,你最好檢查一下

134
00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:01,170
我接受的是驚嚇專員的訓練

135
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:03,297
還獲選為去年的驚嚇之王

136
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:05,466
- 所以...
-「那挺了不起的」

137
00:07:05,466 --> 00:07:06,551
我知道

138
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,928
你說過好幾百次了

139
00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:12,473
你曾是一流的驚嚇專員
現在想成為一流的歡笑專員

140
00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:14,976
我只是想保持樂觀,你懂的

141
00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:16,352
我懂

142
00:07:16,477 --> 00:07:18,521
我真的很想幫你

143
00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:20,022
但我才六歲

144
00:07:20,022 --> 00:07:24,735
而且我明天有一本
很大本的著色本要畫,所以...

145
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:27,196
當然了,我...

146
00:07:27,196 --> 00:07:29,407
我下次會逗你笑出來的

147
00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:30,658
好

148
00:07:30,658 --> 00:07:31,742
今天很開心...

149
00:07:31,742 --> 00:07:33,953
- 晚安
- 晚安,泰勒

150
00:07:40,877 --> 00:07:43,004
- 班恩那邊狀況如何?
- 誰?

151
00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:45,923
那個喜歡彈樂器的可愛小男孩

152
00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:48,134
他還喜歡著色跟睡滿八小時

153
00:07:48,134 --> 00:07:49,218
就是班恩啊

154
00:07:49,218 --> 00:07:50,344
喔對

155
00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:51,429
原來他叫班恩

156
00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,306
是啊...他還不錯

157
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,599
雖然有點奇怪

158
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:56,601
他不喜歡我的甜甜圈段子了

159
00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:00,605
能量瓶有點空喔,大學生

160
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,815
幸好現在已經沒有排行榜了

161
00:08:02,815 --> 00:08:05,568
不然你一定是最後一名

162
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:07,487
不好意思鄧肯,我必須請你

163
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,739
不要妨礙歡笑專員工作

164
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:10,823
不要聽他亂講

165
00:08:10,823 --> 00:08:13,659
你應該學學我,相信這個貼紙

166
00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:15,244
「你是明星」,泰勒!

167
00:08:15,244 --> 00:08:18,372
你搞笑的樣子太過耀眼
我都得戴墨鏡了

168
00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:22,668
謝了,薇兒

169
00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:28,382
這才像話!

170
00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:31,427
恭喜大家

171
00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,930
今天的咯咯瓦業績已經達標了

172
00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:34,889
有空的人

173
00:08:34,889 --> 00:08:37,475
歡迎來一起參與怪獸大學的

174
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:38,726
返校日球賽

175
00:08:38,726 --> 00:08:40,228
加油,怪獸大學!

176
00:08:40,728 --> 00:08:41,604
瑪莉!

177
00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:44,273
妳也加油,怪獸大學也加油!

178
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:47,777
我真想做出一點貢獻

179
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:49,278
我們大家都盡力了

180
00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:52,657
現在我要護送上一任的驚嚇之王

181
00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:54,242
尊貴的陛下

182
00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:56,953
好了,妳夠了

183
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:59,705
難怪他還沒被開除

184
00:08:59,705 --> 00:09:01,374
他好忠心

185
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,960
大王萬歲!

186
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:10,967
(怪獸大學)

187
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:14,720
(歡迎光臨)
(怪獸大學返校日球賽)

188
00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:21,269
他在那裡!

189
00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:22,687
- 泰勒老大!
- 嘿!

190
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:23,854
你好嗎?

191
00:09:23,854 --> 00:09:25,898
- 活生生的泰老大
- 你好

192
00:09:25,898 --> 00:09:27,233
- 歡迎回來
- 你好

193
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,526
- 你好
- 是泰勒耶

194
00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:29,902
- 歡迎回來
- 你好

195
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,488
- 你好,泰勒
- 你好

196
00:09:32,488 --> 00:09:33,739
- 你好嗎?
- 驚嚇之王!

197
00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:36,033
- 回來真好
- 請拿一張吧

198
00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:37,368
妳在做什麼?

199
00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:40,329
華斯基先生請我幫忙
招募新的歡笑專員

200
00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:42,206
而這裡最適合招募了

201
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,458
回來真好

202
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:45,918
真是懷念

203
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,005
我輟學之後就沒再回來過了

204
00:09:49,672 --> 00:09:51,299
驚嚇學院不是人人都能唸的

205
00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:52,717
我的成績不太好

206
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:56,429
但還是有些美好回憶
例如在這個垃圾桶旁跟你招手

207
00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:59,265
還有在這個長椅旁

208
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:02,476
在這片草地上,我以為你回應我了

209
00:10:02,476 --> 00:10:04,478
結果你是在跟別人招手

210
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:06,564
我真希望我當時回應了妳

211
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:08,941
我很遺憾我們當時不是朋友

212
00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:10,985
但我很高興我們現在是了

213
00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:12,903
我也是

214
00:10:12,903 --> 00:10:16,115
各位學生、球迷跟校友

215
00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:18,743
- 歡迎光臨怪獸大學
- 衝啊,葛佛

216
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,077
衝啊,衝啊

217
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,997
- 葛科有空檔
- 接到了

218
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:25,082
到手的鴨子飛了

219
00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:27,251
反正也不是真正的鴨子

220
00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:32,214
他們失去了二十碼

221
00:10:32,214 --> 00:10:34,550
- 可能也失去了山謬
- 快掙脫

222
00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:36,636
誰不愛看美式足球呢?

223
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,013
又有足又有球的

224
00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:40,306
恐懼科技展開突襲

225
00:10:40,681 --> 00:10:43,726
真想不到我能跟你一起站在球場上

226
00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:45,478
- 怪獸大學!
- 他不為所動

227
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,313
- 三隻腳站得穩穩的
- 怪獸大學

228
00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,775
我不喜歡美式足球
不喜歡高的地方跟泰勒

229
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:52,318
滾開啦,臭鳥

230
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:53,944
一切都糟透了

231
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:55,905
你在說什麼呢?

232
00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:57,531
這裡棒透了

233
00:10:57,698 --> 00:11:00,284
整個球場一覽無遺

234
00:11:02,703 --> 00:11:03,579
完了

235
00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:05,956
- 喂!
- 沒關係

236
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:07,541
我可以靠形狀分辨

237
00:11:07,541 --> 00:11:09,377
這一坨應該就是四分衛

238
00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,921
或是這位先生的脾臟

239
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:15,257
- 怪獸大學!
- 衝啊...衝啊!

240
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:18,010
威廉斯退了幾步,使出了一記長傳

241
00:11:18,010 --> 00:11:20,429
是個驚嚇瑪麗亞長傳!

242
00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:22,890
- 糟糕
- 小心

243
00:11:25,643 --> 00:11:26,686
你知道的

244
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:29,605
看球賽也不是越近越好

245
00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:31,107
謝謝你

246
00:11:31,482 --> 00:11:32,983
強尼沃辛頓

247
00:11:32,983 --> 00:11:35,027
可以幫我簽名嗎?

248
00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:37,613
- 這是我的榮幸,小朋友
- 拜託你

249
00:11:37,613 --> 00:11:39,990
- 拜託
- 你有我的新秀卡呢

250
00:11:39,990 --> 00:11:42,618
- 這很稀有喔
- 你是我最愛的驚嚇專員

251
00:11:42,618 --> 00:11:44,537
- 衝啊!
- 你是名人嗎?

252
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:46,580
我...曾經是

253
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,416
我是說...我是...

254
00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,543
這個大人物叫泰勒圖斯克蒙

255
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,211
他打破了很多我的驚嚇紀錄

256
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:55,840
他是班上的第一名
還是去年的驚嚇之王

257
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:58,426
圖斯克蒙?

258
00:11:58,843 --> 00:11:59,969
還是算了吧

259
00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:02,847
怪獸大學試圖射門

260
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:04,348
山謬持球

261
00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:06,016
球踢飛出去

262
00:12:06,016 --> 00:12:07,560
山謬也被踢出去了

263
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:15,192
擦柱進門得分!

264
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:19,655
現在進入中場休息

265
00:12:19,655 --> 00:12:22,700
但先別走開,接下來我們要

266
00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:26,245
向怪獸大學歷任的
驚嚇之王與驚嚇女王致敬

267
00:12:26,245 --> 00:12:30,791
請各位王者移駕至球場上
讓我們一睹各位的風采

268
00:12:31,375 --> 00:12:32,960
他說的就是你

269
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:36,172
走吧孩子,享受一下我們的光輝時刻

270
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:38,299
再見,孩子
再見,寶貝,愛妳喔

271
00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:41,010
不要在陽光下待太久,你很容易曬傷

272
00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:42,970
加油,爸爸

273
00:12:42,970 --> 00:12:45,055
傑傑,你這個馬屁精

274
00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:50,352
泰勒要上場了

275
00:12:50,561 --> 00:12:52,521
加油,泰勒!

276
00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:54,440
泰勒!我們在上面這裡

277
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,525
他聽見了嗎?他有沒有看見我們?

278
00:12:56,984 --> 00:12:58,486
我什麼都看不到

279
00:12:58,861 --> 00:12:59,862
除非...

280
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:06,118
畫面跟工會對於
辦公室戀情的立場一樣模糊

281
00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,620
還是不夠高

282
00:13:11,832 --> 00:13:12,917
我很忙

283
00:13:13,083 --> 00:13:14,752
喂!喂!

284
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:16,045
臭鳥!

285
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:18,214
透過望遠鏡看起來更可憐了

286
00:13:19,006 --> 00:13:20,466
歡迎回來,各位王者

287
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:21,926
見到你們真開心

288
00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:23,093
大家排成一排吧

289
00:13:23,093 --> 00:13:24,303
K教授

290
00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:26,889
- 真高興見到你
- 強尼!泰勒!

291
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:29,683
我最喜歡的學生並肩而立

292
00:13:29,683 --> 00:13:31,227
我看了真開心

293
00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,187
我差點認不出誰是誰了

294
00:13:34,271 --> 00:13:35,481
可能是角長得太像了

295
00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:37,483
你可以跟他學兩招

296
00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:40,236
怕只怕那兩招學了也派不上用場

297
00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:41,320
對吧?

298
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,531
- 你真愛開玩笑,他很搞笑吧?
- 是啊

299
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:45,199
各位怪獸

300
00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:48,994
歡迎來到我們一年一度的
返校日球賽中場秀

301
00:13:49,119 --> 00:13:52,915
我們要向歷屆的
驚嚇之王與驚嚇女王致敬

302
00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:54,416
加油,泰勒!

303
00:13:54,416 --> 00:13:55,835
耶!爸爸加油!

304
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:57,253
- 耶!
- 加油,小子!

305
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:58,462
隨便啦

306
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:01,549
我們現在要做什麼?

307
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,300
微笑揮手就好了

308
00:14:07,304 --> 00:14:08,305
我們要加班

309
00:14:08,305 --> 00:14:10,599
但至少可以收聽球賽轉播
幫泰勒加油

310
00:14:10,724 --> 00:14:13,310
不管播什麼
都比這個電視台的等候音樂好聽

311
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:14,812
這音樂跟他們的新聞一樣爛

312
00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:17,982
掌聲歡迎賈布袋魷魚怪

313
00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:19,567
他欠我錢沒還耶

314
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:22,236
還有桃樂絲蛇尾雞

315
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,655
- 我以為她已經死了
- 只有心死了

316
00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:28,367
我做完了

317
00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:31,662
謝了,卡麥隆

318
00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:33,205
還有恐懼公司的執行長

319
00:14:33,205 --> 00:14:34,373
(圖斯克蒙五金行)

320
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,959
強尼沃辛頓

321
00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:39,920
看看他毛皮上的光澤

322
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:42,715
或許他單身

323
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:45,134
真可惜,他已經結婚了

324
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:47,094
- 米莉
- 拜託

325
00:14:47,469 --> 00:14:49,305
我只是在開玩笑

326
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:50,556
我查過了

327
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,392
頂尖驚嚇專員?少來了

328
00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:56,353
你在驚嚇遊戲中輕鬆就贏過他了

329
00:14:56,353 --> 00:14:59,273
但我們作弊,還因此被退學

330
00:14:59,273 --> 00:15:00,900
那都是細節

331
00:15:01,025 --> 00:15:03,360
這些都無所謂
因為我們會擊敗恐懼公司

332
00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,738
成為最棒、最有效率的電力公司

333
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:06,864
我們成功之後,毛怪

334
00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:08,240
我要走到他面前

335
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,992
跟他說:「你是個小渣渣

336
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,452
-「沒人喜歡...」
- 小渣渣?

337
00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:13,329
- 不要太過分了
- 不是說妳,女士

338
00:15:15,122 --> 00:15:16,582
聽起來挺順利的

339
00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:17,708
才沒有

340
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,545
我們最後的壓軸

341
00:15:21,545 --> 00:15:24,798
就是現任的驚嚇之王
他是班上的第一名

342
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:29,094
還是最大吼叫音量的紀錄保持人

343
00:15:29,219 --> 00:15:33,432
請歡迎泰勒圖斯克蒙

344
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:36,101
- 加油,泰勒!
- 耶!

345
00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,937
泰勒任職於怪獸公司

346
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:40,022
擔任頂尖驚嚇專員

347
00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:42,733
我現在是歡笑專員了...

348
00:15:42,733 --> 00:15:43,984
歡笑專員?

349
00:15:43,984 --> 00:15:45,569
那是什麼玩意兒?

350
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:46,904
抱歉,那就是...

351
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:48,364
我能不能...抱歉,各位

352
00:15:48,489 --> 00:15:49,990
我是泰勒

353
00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:51,700
我現在不是驚嚇專員

354
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:52,826
我是歡笑專員

355
00:15:52,826 --> 00:15:54,954
怪獸公司改用笑聲發電了

356
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,080
請你...好

357
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,790
我現在專門逗小孩笑

358
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,583
我是歡笑專員

359
00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:04,797
你真愛開玩笑

360
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:07,216
我有一個很好笑的段子

361
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:09,218
- 會用到甜甜圈
- 麥克風還我

362
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:12,096
現場有人身上有甜甜圈嗎?

363
00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:14,682
- 沒有
- 好吧...

364
00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:17,851
那大家想像一下
我的角上面掛著甜甜圈

365
00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:20,729
有時候我會這樣掛上去

366
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:26,402
然後我會說
「這些甜甜圈是誰點的?」

367
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,028
我不知道耶,誰點的?

368
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,032
我聽見泰勒可愛又緊張的聲音了

369
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:34,076
他講得怎麼樣?

370
00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:37,204
他當著幾千人的面出醜

371
00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:40,499
真是天上掉下來的禮物

372
00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:45,629
還會把甜甜圈當毽子踢

373
00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,924
- 這要用到膝蓋
- 我不忍心看了

374
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:50,676
有人說:「任何曝光都是好曝光」

375
00:16:50,676 --> 00:16:52,928
- 但這或許是例外
- 因為我...

376
00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:57,016
沒有甜甜圈
有點表現不出其中的精隨

377
00:16:58,892 --> 00:17:02,187
海怪都吃什麼當晚餐?

378
00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:04,773
鮮魚「舟」

379
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,610
鮮魚跟舟,懂嗎?

380
00:17:08,610 --> 00:17:09,862
鮮魚「舟」

381
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:12,614
- 那是我的笑話
- 親愛的

382
00:17:12,614 --> 00:17:15,409
但他不夠強調諧音的部分

383
00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:18,287
- 因為「舟」就是船...
- 謝謝你,泰勒圖斯克蒙

384
00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:19,997
你還是別急著轉行吧!

385
00:17:20,622 --> 00:17:22,124
等等,你就是做這行的

386
00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:24,084
太棒了

387
00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:25,669
真是一場災難

388
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:39,975
歡笑專員?

389
00:17:39,975 --> 00:17:41,143
開什麼玩笑

390
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:42,978
「讓驚嚇專員蛻變成歡笑專員」

391
00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:44,605
最好是

392
00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:46,523
(我們讓驚嚇專員蛻變成歡笑專員)

393
00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:47,441
真可悲

394
00:18:03,707 --> 00:18:05,209
薇兒,我在做什麼?

395
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,544
我連一個能量瓶都裝不滿

396
00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:10,839
拜託,你今天那一瓶就快裝滿了啊

397
00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:11,924
是啊

398
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,593
我只是希望我表現能更好

399
00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:21,016
沃辛頓先生...

400
00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:24,812
我身經百戰
所以知道勝敗乃兵家常事

401
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:27,564
不要太苛責自己了

402
00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:29,149
你非常有潛力

403
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,985
總有一天,你會在世界上留下印記的

404
00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:33,904
大學生

405
00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:35,322
- 該走了
- 快點

406
00:18:35,447 --> 00:18:36,865
使命在呼喚我這老爸

407
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:38,450
我是說「屎」命

408
00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:39,701
打起精神

409
00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:40,994
下次會成功的

410
00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:42,663
謝了,沃辛頓先生

411
00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:44,748
請叫我強尼就好

412
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:46,875
繼續好好發電吧

413
00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:53,298
怪獸新聞網您好

414
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:54,466
喂,您好

415
00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:56,760
幫我轉接
《我尖叫,你尖叫》的傑克跟吉兒

416
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,221
- 我是麥克華斯基
- 沒聽過這個人

417
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,890
好啦,我是「麥克滑稽」

418
00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:04,601
原來是滑稽先生,我馬上幫您轉接

419
00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:07,855
- 這個語音信箱屬於...
- 傑克...

420
00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:09,273
- 以及...
- 吉兒

421
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:10,357
留言時間已滿

422
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:12,317
請於上班時間再撥

423
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:14,570
不!

424
00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:20,701
要去吃晚餐嗎?

425
00:19:20,909 --> 00:19:22,161
好,我餓了

426
00:19:23,912 --> 00:19:25,998
你確定不用我等你嗎?

427
00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,624
不用,真的沒關係

428
00:19:27,624 --> 00:19:30,252
我想走路回家,理清一些思緒

429
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,004
明天見了,好嗎?

430
00:19:32,212 --> 00:19:34,381
好,明天見

431
00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:41,805
好

432
00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:44,349
我一定能填滿這個能量瓶

433
00:19:45,475 --> 00:19:47,019
好,來吧

434
00:19:50,898 --> 00:19:53,692
嘿,這些甜甜圈是誰點的?

435
00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:58,447
拜託,別再來了

436
00:19:58,447 --> 00:19:59,740
怪獸在哪裡?

437
00:19:59,740 --> 00:20:01,992
怪獸在哪裡啊?

438
00:20:04,953 --> 00:20:06,663
不是...不是

439
00:20:06,663 --> 00:20:08,332
我不是故意要嚇妳的

440
00:20:08,332 --> 00:20:11,418
這個給妳...這是個臨別甜甜圈

441
00:20:11,418 --> 00:20:13,587
妳慢慢吃,好,再見

442
00:20:17,799 --> 00:20:19,218
終於填滿了

443
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,137
一點笑聲電力,跟一點尖叫電力

444
00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:23,680
加起來還是一瓶嘛

445
00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:40,669
泰勒

446
00:23:40,669 --> 00:23:43,880
你聽說了嗎?
有隻怪獸吃掉了好幾棟房子

447
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,882
沒有耶,他還好嗎?

448
00:23:45,882 --> 00:23:48,343
沒事啦,那只是...

449
00:23:48,343 --> 00:23:49,594
「家庭小吃」

450
00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:54,933
哇,這笑話比爸的還爛

451
00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,519
字幕翻譯: 林律齊