[MUSIC - JERRY PAPER, "GREY AREA"]
(SINGING) Grey area, come and find me in the noise of life.
I've got a funny feeling I'm in transition
till out goes my light.
[car horn honking]
Stable ground is hard to come by in this big, old world.
[chatter]
How are you not hot in that turtleneck?
I have bad circulation.
Oh my god.
Did you just to Google Manic Pixie Dream Girl?
I don't know that is.
Oh, I just couldn't go to an urban farming talk at my local
co-op alone.
OK.
I didn't know that was happening.
Uh-huh.
Then I'll just bring a stranger to IHOP
because I'm super relatable and very spontaneous.
You said cheap and close.
Did I mention that my father was a playwright
and my mother was an actress?
OK.
That is unconfirmed because my mom
died when I was really little and my dad hates
talking about her.
And I think my sister made up the actress part.
Likely story.
Do I just sound like a, like, big faker?
Is that what a manic whatever is?
No.
I'm just-- I'm negging you.
I don't-- I don't know what that means.
Oh, girl, you have got to leave your house more.
It's like, oh, you're a producer?
Yeah, right.
Only guys are producers.
Well, technically I am a stage manager.
OK.
It doesn't work when you neg yourself.
What is it supposed to accomplish?
It's supposed to make a woman insecure so that she likes you.
This is me.
You live in a theater?
Above it.
Do you have roommates?
Are they cool?
There's nothing worse than living
in a theater with randos.
Wow.
Goodnight.
It worked.
What worked?
The negging did.
[laughter]
I could get another drink if you want.
[police sirens]
[car horns]
So do you want to--
This was really fun.
[music playing]
JACKIE: I won.
DODGE: No, Mom, you have to go out on a Dis card.
JACKIE: No.
I don't have any cards left I won.
DODGE: I have, like, three times more points than you.
JACKIE: Rachel, did you know that I'm good at cards?
No.
I didn't know that you're good at cards.
You guys been playing since I left?
- Do you want to play again? - No.
You cheat. JACKIE: No.
I'm on a strict--
Hey, Dad, do you have pages to show me?
No.
What? You were gone forever.
You were gone for like, five hours.
I was gone for two hours.
Did you get my nut cheese?
You have lipstick on your face.
JACKIE: Oh, my god.
You little dirty girl.
Tell me. I won't freak out, just tell me.
Did you kiss somebody?
I wish you would have told me that.
I have to live vicariously through you.
Hey, Dad, I'm not trying to be a nag.
It's just that--
[blender mixing]
--if we don't get them the new draft by tomorrow,
all of your mentors will be working off of the old,
old draft, which kind of defeats the purpose.
You get what I'm--
Was she pretty?
Was she like, my kind of pretty or your kind of pretty?
- You had one job. - OK.
What has he been doing all night?
I don't know what he's been doing.
We were hanging out.
MEL: Jackie, tell your sister what
we were working on tonight.
OK.
Oh, yeah.
Now?
So Dad and I were talking about how we really
want to see "Kristoff's Death," you know?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
We want to see it, literally.
And I just think performance-wise it
would be really juicy.
You OK?
Mm-hmm.
You seem mad.
I'm not.
OK.
Because I thought a lot about it.
And I feel like as an actor coming into it,
it's going to be pretty powerful.
I mean, it's like a Madea, you know,
when she kills the kids off-stage and nobody sees it.
And they're like, what happened?
It's a nosedive so early.
And I don't want that to--
you know, it's like, why would people go to the show anymore?
And I want people to do the show for a long time.
Also, we already blocked it.
So basically, your job is done.
It's already written for you, so congratulations.
Did you use my toothbrush?
I think Dad did, because I accidentally
used his to clean my boots.
But look.
No shoes in the bathroom, please.
So Dad really thinks that we need to see "Kristoff's Death."
What do you think?
(WHISPERING) This is the part where
you tell me what you think.
You don't have anything to say?
OK.
Well, maybe we'll just show you tomorrow.
Sound good?
Dad, we're going to show her tomorrow!
MEL: I'm working!
[MUSIC - JERRY PAPER, "GREY AREA"]
MEL (AS KRISTOFF): [groaning in pain]..
Kristoff.
Ah!
[crying]
That's enough.
OK.
I really thought that the idea of not showing the death
was brilliant.
That was your idea.
But you agreed it was right.
MEL: Well, I think it's too ambiguous.
But the ambiguity is good, no?
JACKIE: I think that catharsis is better acting-wise.
Can we pick this up later? - No.
Yes.
JACKIE: I have to take Dodge to her first therapy appointment.
I already told you I don't want you to come.
I just need to grab your metro card.
RACHEL: Hey, Dad-- DODGE: Mom, seriously.
You're going to have so much time
to work on this at The Fellowship.
But right now, you really got to focus on getting that end.
Your sister and I aren't done.
I totally hear that.
We just have to get the draft in today.
JACKIE: Honey, I want to be a mother, not a smother.
But I do think that you need a grown-up to accompany you
because it's your first therapy meeting.
She's right, Dodge.
You guys go. - Great.
Dad, you and I can write.
I really wish you wouldn't do that in here.
WOMAN: Hello. - We're working.
Well, we booked this space--
Expecting Mommies Improv Troop.
Yes, hi.
- Is that a real cigarette? - Yup.
No. JACKIE: Ooh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I have to.
I love you're performing when you're preggie.
It's so good.
It's good for you, it's good for them.
OK.
Let's not touch them.
Come on, sweetie.
I'll take you.
[music playing]
MEL: Where we going?
Are you already thinking about schools?
You can't think about that stuff too early.
We were home schooled, actually, which I highly recommend.
Thank you. JACKIE: Oh, I'm jealous.
RACHEL: We'll get out of your way.
- Thank you very much. - Yeah.
Is it your first? RACHEL: Jackie, let's go.
'Cause I only have one.
And I really want to have another.
Have fun. Break a leg.
Make yourselves at home.
Jackie, come on.
Why is Dodge in therapy?
Because she doesn't have any friends, sweetie.
Well, how are we paying for it?
Friends and family discount.
Remember that really smart guy I told you
that I met last weekend?
Please tell me that Dodge's therapist isn't a guy
you met at a bar.
No, silly goose.
I met him at this really beautiful wine tasting
that I technically didn't pay for, I snuck into.
But he is great.
I'm just here to listen.
You can tell me anything, first thing
that comes into your mind.
A dream you had, what you ate for breakfast--
Well, sometimes, uh... sometimes my mom is--
Uh, that's decorative from 1920.
I don't think it would be very much fun to play with, anyway.
Uh, this is, uh, this is sort of fun.
Lots of stuff you can do with that.
So you were saying?
Um, just that my mom is sometimes--
PETER: Hold up.
I owe you an apology.
I've been working on becoming more flexible.
It's so funny.
You create all these systems and mechanisms of control
until one day you wake up and you realize
that they're controlling you.
Are you sure there isn't anything you want to talk about?
[music playing]
MEL: Just tell her, not for me.
I'm like Grandpa, not for me.
DODGE: Yeah.
That's 'cause she listens to you.
Hey.
JACKIE: Wait.
My love, my baby, how was therapy?
Did you talk about me?
You want to check this out?
I think this is a little more what you were going for.
You obviously will be tweaking it at The Fellowship, but just,
you know, for the purposes of getting it in today--
I don't want a bunch of hacks changing my work.
They're just giving you feedback.
I don't want any more feedback.
Can you focus on the fact that this gives you
a guaranteed premiere and a real run at their theater?
I have a theater, an incredible theater.
Tennessee Williams sat on my stage.
RACHEL: Yeah.
The Montgomery has a built-in audience, that's all this is.
You've written a really good play, Dad.
People deserve to see your play.
And they want you to say something tonight
about your work.
They do?
RACHEL: Yeah.
Here.
You work on that.
Am I good to type this up and turn it in?
Yeah, yeah.
It's fine.
OK.
[music playing]
JACKIE: Here we are at the world's greatest theater.
And here we are with the world's greatest playwright.
He's walking up the stairs.
He's loving his life.
He's doing-- oh, my god.
Dad. MEL: Woo!
JACKIE: Dad! - Whoa!
JACKIE: Dad! - Dad!
Help me!
Help me sir, please.
Help me. - Oh, I don't know this man.
I'm so sorry. MEL: My god.
I'm sorry. He's fine.
I'm so sorry.
MEL: Have you no feelings?
Let's do that again.
What, do I got dandruff?
No.
You just have some fuzz.
I got to go over my speech.
How long is it?
Just-- just out of curiosity.
Do you want to read it?
Do you want me to read it?
Mel Gurner.
I am such a fan of "The Way I See It."
Such elegant writing.
(SINGING) There is an open bar.
Two for you. Hi.
Two for you.
Going to get me one.
These are my daughters.
No, Jackie.
WOMAN: A-ha.
I knew there was a reason you wrote women so well.
Have you met everyone?
No.
WOMAN: We are so happy you're bringing a little age
diversity into the group.
We, the underrepresented majority,
will no longer be pushed to the margins.
Because we are the future of theater.
[applause]
You may know, our next fellow from his groundbreaking
performance in the 1971 Broadway production of "A Doll's House."
But tonight we're celebrating his more recent accomplishment
as a playwright.
Please welcome Mel Gurner.
[applause]
(SINGING) Gee, I'm great.
Gee, I'm grand.
Pat me on the back and shake my hand.
[blows raspberries]
Break a leg.
[laughter]
Woo!
[sparse applause]
[music playing]
RACHEL: It reflects really badly on me.
JACKIE: Yeah, I get that.
But I really think you're overreacting.
Who the fuck does he think he is?
My recent accomplishment as a playwright?
How about mentioning the other 50 plays
I wrote and produced myself.
Which nobody saw or cares about.
Me thinks I have [inaudible] Coward, you coward.
DODGE: I'm a coward. MEL: You're a coward?
- I'm a coward! - You're a coward?
I'm a coward!
You're a coward?
Oh, my beauty, they're bound to recast you.
You don't know that.
MEL: We don't need the circle jerk players theater.
We own a theater.
That we need to be renting out.
MEL: I'm sick of pimping this place out.
It's my play.
We're doing it at my theater.
With what money?
Have a little imagination, Rachel, for Christ's sake.
Imagination's not really Rachel's thing.
Rachel is more of a logic guy, dad.
Can we not fight please?
This was actually almost something real.
MEL: (SINGING) It's my play.
It's my play.
Don't rewrite a word I say. OK?
OK. OK?
OK. OK.
Why do you care so much?
I don't know.
Huh?
I don't know.
It's my play.
I should be able to do whatever I want with it.
Right?
[music playing]
You disagree?
Inserting yourself into the process
does not make you a playwright.
You're very good stage manager.
Be happy about that.
I don't really care about your stupid fucking play.
I just need you to have a life so that I can finally have one.
I didn't realize this wasn't a life.
We're doing the show here.
You don't have to be a part of it.
[breathing heavy]
Hey, ho, Daddio.
You hens make up?
That was a stressful one.
Aw, buddy.
Want a hug?
Aw, Dad.
[laughs] You want to rehearse right now?
OK.
Let's go from the part where I put in the knife.
Ugh.
Ow. OK.
DODGE: What are you guys doing? - Get up now, Daddy.
It's OK, baby. - Grandpa?
We're just running the scene. Dad, get up.
You're hurting me. Daddy.
- Grandpa. - Dad?
Don't touch him, baby. Rachel!
- Rachel! - Dad, get up.
Can you hear me? Daddy?
Rachel!
Dad?
Grandpa.
Dad? Rachel, help me get him up.
I don't think he's breathing. He just slumped over.
I don't know what happened. Help me get him up!
Get his body!
[MUSIC - MANDY PATINKIN, "RAGGEDY ANN"] Gobbly,
obbul obbully gumbo, be biki lie bye biki like bono, oh, no, no,
no, no, no, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
She's my Raggedy Ann, now you know what I mean?
Her eyes are made out of tangerine.
And her hair is bright, bright green.
Oops, I mean red.
I mean, my Raggedy Ann, now you know what I mean.
Her eyes are made out of tangerine.
And her lips are made out of cellophane.
Only for me she goes gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no, no, no, no, no--
I just want you to know that the only reason that I'm
the executor is because I'm older.
OK.
Then you should know we have an accountant coming tomorrow.
Cool.
You can get him set up and then you can have a job, too.
That's cool.
MICHAEL: MTJ is here to save that day.
- Hi. - Hello.
Hey, hold my calls.
I'm in a very important meeting.
Thank you very much.
Come, give me one.
Give me two. Hi, lovely to meet you.
We're a little too far. It's a little awkward.
- Not a problem. - Right?
Let's admit it.
[chuckles] I was closing on a new car.
What kind of car?
MICHAEL: Chevy Malibu.
Super fast.
I hope you don't mind me showing up instead of my old man.
You see, you probably weren't expecting such a young guy.
This is the will?
MICHAEL: Uh-huh.
Be careful.
Cool.
Um, Rach, I'm the executor so first eyes on it.
Yeah.
That looks good.
MICHAEL: OK, jumping right in.
I like it. I like it.
Good game plan.
Let's see what we got here.
Wow.
Ladies, all right, this has not been updated
in a-- in a very long time.
No funeral.
Building goes to the co-owner.
And he left you some photos.
What co-owner?
Yeah, what?
Our dad is the sole owner of our building.
No.
Co-owner was Sharon Gurner.
Is that your mom?
She's dead.
MICHAEL: OK.
Not to worry, not to worry.
Let me just look up your building's public property
records.
Brand new computer, super fast.
Have it in a jiffy.
No Sharon Gurner.
Yeah.
Sherrell Gerhart is the co-owner.
OK.
MICHAEL: Sounds French, Sherrell Gerhart.
Excuse me.
OK, taking charge.
Why is a soap actress listed as the co-owner
of our building?
[music playing]
JACKIE: Let me do it.
Let me do it.
Please, god, let him live.
JACKIE: [chuckle] Oh, my god.
You know who she kind of looks like?
Looks a lot like you.
We should go. We'll get to the bottom of this.
Thank you. JACKIE: Wait.
Why would Dad-- RACHEL: Jackie.
--co-own a building with this woman?
[music playing]
RACHEL: Why don't you remember anything?
I was four, Rach.
We had a funeral.
Was I suppose to know that was fake?
You mean this?
You mean us dressed in black at Coney Island?
- OK, whatever. - Where are you going?
We're this way.
No. Those soap citiers are on the West Side.
You want to meet her right now?
- Yes. - No.
We're not doing that.
- I'm doing that. - Nope.
We are not. - Ow.
Stay.
Come on.
Look at me.
She owns our building.
I know.
As far as we know, she doesn't know that Dad's dead yet.
We don't know what she'll do.
She might want to sell it.
She might want us out of there.
We don't know her.
She's our mother.
Don't you think if she thought of herself that way,
we would have met her by now?
I don't know.
Let's get a drink.
You want a drink?
Yeah.
Do you want one?
Yeah.
[music playing]
We got to tell Dodge.
No.
Please promise me we won't tell Dodge about this.
[sigh]
Promise me.
I take it you didn't like the will?
You have a grandmother.
The will was fine.
Should we watch a movie or something?
Yeah, sure.
OK.
Why don't you set up the projector?
OK.
Great.
This was grandpa's favorite part.
What?
Nothing.
[music playing]
JACKIE: Shit.
RACHEL: Jackie?
Jackie?
[music playing]
[phone ringing]
Hello?
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Hey, this is Charles.
Are you here?
Yes.
Yeah, I'm coming.
I'm on my way out.
Thanks.
Dodge, you got to get up.
The new accountant's here.
Baby, you got to wake up.
I'm so sorry.
Come on. I know.
OK.
I'll get your pants.
Can you hold these for me, please?
Thank you.
Hi.
I'm so sorry.
I'm Rachel.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Dodge, Charles is helping us out with some accounting
to figure out how we can afford to do Grandpa's play.
I left my dad's financials in the office.
If you can't find anything, just ask her.
She grew up here.
I'll be back in a bit.
Cool.
Uh, it's locked.
Um--
Seriously?
I don't have my--
ooh, my key.
Uh, we could try breaking in.
No, no, no, no, no.
We're-- we're not breaking in.
Just one second.
[phone ringing]
I'll call my mom.
[music playing]
Where is my fucking phone?
[cell phone ringing]
Jackie, I see you.
I see you.
Jackie!
You do not want to meet this woman.
If you tell them you are, you're just
going to sound like a crazy fan.
I know!
I'm not crazy!
You're jeopardizing our home and our business.
Hi. We need to be closing right now.
Do not go in there. Jackie!
Yeah.
I've got RKO banging down my door.
Well, if she's on uppers, then put her on some downers.
SECURITY GUARD: Miss. - You know what I mean?
I'm a producer. SECURITY GUARD: Miss.
Well, you tell them America doesn't
want to see a pregnant whale-- - Hey!
- --on the screen. - I'm calling the cops.
- Jackie! - Who do I have to t--
It's OK.
We're leaving right now.
I'll call you back.
OK.
What is your name, ma'am?
How is it pronounced?
Rhonda.
OK.
Thank you for your time.
Sorry.
I'm sorry.
Thank you.
Where's is your metro card?
Well, I'd say we could just flirt our way in,
but you decided to dress like a Mennonite caterer today.
And that's not going to work, is it?
Buddy, I know that you're processing a lot right now.
Yes.
I just don't want you to get arrested.
Well, then help me.
I'm trying.
I promise you if after talking about this
and getting a little more information you still want
to meet her, I will help you.
I just want to see her.
I totally get that.
I mean, it's not like I'm going to tell about Dad
or tell her who we are or anything
if I think she's a dick.
OK.
Well, let's talk about it at home.
We have got to get you a wallet.
Oh, sorry.
I respect your decision!
Hi.
I'm friends with Rhonda from parking,
and I left my phone in the bathroom.
No. Uh-uh.
SECURITY GUARD: Be quick.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[elevator bell]
I'm a caterer, as well.
[chatter]
Excuse me. Thank you.
MAN: It was a 6:30 call for makeup.
WOMAN: I don't know who taught you how to make a call sheet,
but this is completely unacceptable.
No. I did--
The level of incompetence you've exhibited--
MAN: But he-- he told me wardrobe and [inaudible]..
[chatter]
What?
You're not supposed to be here yet.
And you cut your hair?
Your agent didn't even tell me that.
Guys, I'm sorry.
This is Eleanor Peabody.
She's early.
We're not ready for you. MAN: We're ready.
Stay.
MAN: Ron, you ready?
Born ready.
DIRECTOR: OK.
So kids, we're just going to start with a little improv.
Um, I'm not who you think I am.
Great.
No, you're not.
But I will spend the rest of my life trying to figure out
who you really are.
To hell with your past.
Veronica, I've loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you.
No.
Come here. Come here.
- No. - Beautiful--
- No. - --angel.
No! I said no!
Oh.
Oh!
Shame on you!
Oh.
That girl is a psychopath.
The worse.
JACKIE: Oh, yay!
I did not want to have to do this on my own.
Yeah. I didn't want to do this at all.
MAN (ON RADIO): We got a psycho up here on the second floor.
[music playing]
They should have a bathroom somewhere back there, I'm sure.
[music playing]
We'll order as soon as my friend gets out of the bathroom.
[music playing]
Oh, look, it's my friend.
Hey, maybe we should grab my daughter.
Not grab her, but--
it's a lot weirder for me than it is for you.
Trust me.
[music playing]
OK.
Hi.
Just sit down.
OK.
So I can figure out how to get us out of here.
Hi.
We're with production.
OK.
I'm just going to go over some dos and don'ts.
I don't care how many of you have done extra work before.
No eating from crafty.
Who here knows what I'm talking about?
Do not, I repeat, do not speak to the principals.
You may think whatever you have to say
is interesting and funny.
I promise you, it isn't.
No looking at the camera.
No getting involved in the scene.
It's called background work for a reason.
Let's go!
Move!
No.
Rachel, I just want to see her one time.
Please?
What is the hold up?
I need this.
I won't fuck it up.
I'm begging you.
Please?
CASTING DIRECTOR: Come on.
We're not talking to her.
We're just going to look at her.
OK.
CASTING DIRECTOR: Don't make me physically move you.
Here we come.
And we're coming.
Let's go.
Faster.
Come on.
She's [inaudible]
MALE ACTOR: You got a knot.
FEMALE ACTOR: You'd better get it out.
MALE ACTOR: You need some deep tissue right here.
[chatter]
No.
Excuse me? Sorry.
Hi.
I just wanted to say, really creative choices in the Roger
funeral scene, the second one.
Because I'm a theater actor, so I
can really tell when somebody's drop dead.
Honestly, it was like watching Shakespeare.
So good job.
OK. [bell ringing]
DIRECTOR: Great.
Here we go.
Camera speed.
Sound speed.
And action.
FEMALE ACTOR: Sorry I'm late.
MALE ACTOR: Better late than never.
FEMALE ACTOR: Mom would kill me if she knew I was here.
MALE ACTOR: Not if I kill her first.
FEMALE ACTOR: Oh, you are bad.
MALE ACTOR: Did you bring the money?
FEMALE ACTOR: They'd only let me take out $10,000 in cash.
MALE ACTOR: We need more.
SHERRELL: What are you doing here?
FEMALE ACTOR: Mom?
SHERRELL: You think you could just
show up like this out of nowhere, with no warning?
You took everything I had--
my inheritance, my dignity.
And now you want my daughter?
DIRECTOR: Cut.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I just-- I-- Ronnie, I mean Rick--
MALE ACTOR: Jesus Christ, Sherrell.
Sherell! [chatter]
Before you say anything--
MALE ACTOR: Come on.
SHERRELL: --I thought Miranda is not going to be intimidated
by this guy-- DIRECTOR: Right.
SHERRELL: --or anybody. DIRECTOR: Right.
SHERRELL: So I just thought, I really just think that--
So this is the line I wrote.
I know what you wrote.
So just say that.
I just--
I don't want to say that. - Just say that.
I feel something diff--
And don't hit him.
Fuck.
[chatter]
SHERRELL: What do I know?
I've just been living with this woman for 30 years.
Let's get out of here.
No.
We shouldn't be here.
CASTING DIRECTOR: You, out.
You looked right into camera.
No, I didn't.
She looked right into camera.
The take's no good.
It's OK, because we're leaving.
No, I'm staying.
Jackie, they asked us to leave.
Let's go. - I want to talk to [inaudible].
SECURITY GUARD: Let's go. JACKIE: No.
That is really unnecessary.
CASTING DIRECTOR: What is going on?
I'm Sharon Gurner's daughter, and so is she.
That's not my name.
That's me.
RACHEL: We didn't want to bother you at work.
We-- - Yeah.
We just didn't know where else to find you.
[bell ringing]
DIRECTOR: Well, we're not going to get another shot in,
so that's lunch.
We're eating outside today.
Happy anniversary.
[chatter]
Come on, guys.
That's it for now.
Time for lunch.
[chatter]
[music playing]
Would you like to join me for lunch?
100%
[music playing]
SHERRELL: Let's take this back to my dressing room.
JACKIE: OK.
RACHEL: OK.
[speaking russian]
SHERRELL: Oh, do you do speak Russian?
No.
That's the only thing in Russian that I know.
Yup.
Can I just say also that I just love
how you've decorated in here?
Thank you.
This stuff, the pink, it's really--
SHERRELL: Do you two do a lot of background work?
Oh, no. No, no.
I'm-- I'm an actress, actress, mostly theater.
And she is my producer.
The stage manager.
SHERRELL: Well, that's where I started,
which is why I have such a low tolerance for bad writing.
They bring in these young kids who know nothing about drama.
JACKIE: Probably like that little guy
that was trying to tell you what to do, huh?
SHERRELL: Yes.
I also have a very low tolerance for controlling men.
[chuckles] I run screaming in the other direction of I
have a sense that someone is trying to box me in.
Excuse me.
Ain't that just the way?
Because honestly, I'm the exact same way with controlling men.
[music playing]
JACKIE: Dad, sit up! Help me get his head, Rachel.
He can't breathe. Dodge, call 911.
DODGE: OK. JACKIE: Call 911.
Tell them the address. Hold his head.
He can't get air.
Dad?
He wasn't like, a bad guy, bad guy--
SHERRELL: Uh-huh.
Like, the kind of guy that you, like, head for the hills
because of. SHERRELL: Oh.
He was just the kind of guy that could only
really hold a conversation for 30 seconds
before he wanted to--
Jackie, let's go.
I'm not leaving.
RACHEL: We have that thing we have to do.
JACKIE: Malarkey.
What thing?
You know what I was going to say before
and it totally skipped my mind is
that I can run lines with you.
Really? JACKIE: Yeah.
I'm actually one of those actors that likes doing it.
And we have a space we can use because our dad used
to run a theater company.
So we-- and--
well, he did-- it doesn't--
sorry.
I forgot I was--
what was I saying?
(SINGING) Sometimes the words come out of my mouth and I'm--
what were you saying before, though, right before?
It's nice to meet you.
It was nice to meet you, too.
JACKIE: Actually, can I-- um, I'm going to give you my cell
just because I think-- SHERRELL: Wonderful.
In case you want to get a hold of us.
I tend to be the one doing the secretarial duties.
[chuckle] OK.
My sevens look like nines, so just be cognizant of that.
Um-- it's--
it's great, um, thank--
thank you.
Thank you.
JACKIE: I'm pretty free.
Good-- good to know.
Jackie.
JACKIE: You're a good hugger.
OK.
Bye.
Yeah.
She was going to find out eventually anyway.
Yeah. No shit.
But I'd like to at least get through the play, our father's
literally dying wish, before we get kicked to the curb.
Oh, that's what you think this is?
That woman's not going to screw us over.
She was so sweet.
Oh, my god.
She wanted to love us.
Jackie, we don't know her.
Well, I want to get to know her.
Yeah.
I think I have a pretty good idea of who she is.
Oh, my god.
What? What?
Who is that? - Nobody.
What are you doing?
Nobody.
Stop it.
I'm going to go over and I'm running lines with her
at her house tonight.
What?
[music playing]
CHARLES: I'm not an idiot.
I know what pot smells like.
All right? - It's not even that bad.
OK? - Take your shoes off.
Kendra does it with her family.
Kendra? What kind of shit?
I don't give a shit what Kendra does with her family.
All right?
She's 16, and you're my kid.
I don't have to listen to what Kendra does with her family.
Nonsense.
OLIVIA: It's not like I'm becoming a hooker or anything.
Hooker? Who says hooker anymore?
It's sex worker.
I've worked so hard to make sure that you can just be a kid.
Just enjoy it.
I don't want to be a kid.
Well, I'm sorry.
You are a kid.
Um, where's your bathroom?
Upstairs.
CHARLES: You got it from that kid your age [inaudible]
OLIVIA: Oh, my god.
Relax.
[muffled arguing]
[music playing]
Hi!
Come on.
Oh, you're here, too.
Yes.
A decorator helped me with most of it.
- Wow. - Yeah, I know.
It's beautiful.
It's sort of a little bit of the Hall of Fame.
And I-- - Oh, it's you.
Yes.
And I-- I love pink roses.
I don't know if either of you gals like--
oh.
[laughs] This is for you.
This is for me?
Yes.
I know it's silly.
But I realized that I had them.
I hung onto them.
For 28 years?
JACKIE: I love presents!
You can ask Rachel.
I flip out.
Oh, my g-- oh, my god, every birthday.
[gasp] Oh, my god.
So sweet, right?
You can feed them. JACKIE: I know.
And they poop.
That's amazing. Rachel, open yours.
Here's a script.
Didn't you want to run lines?
If you don't turn off the path of destruction
you're headed down, I'm going to have
to cut you off at the pass.
And there's bound to be a collision.
I don't want us to both go down in flames for this, Carl.
Isn't that awful?
JACKIE: Yeah.
Because it said down in flames.
It's barely English.
It's up in flames.
You can't go down in flames.
RACHEL: No.
It's a really convoluted way of saying if you keep doing this,
there will be consequences for both of us.
SHERRELL: Exactly.
That-- that's right.
That's-- that's perfect, and this is awful.
I actually don't think it's that awful.
Um, if you tried, like, if you don't turn off
the path of destruction you're headed down,
I'm going to have to cut you off at the pass.
And there's bound to be a collision.
I don't want us to both go down in flames for this, Carl.
What did you just say before?
Um--
If you can do that for all these garbage lines,
I would give you my first born.
Oh, that's you.
JACKIE: Yeah.
[laughs] Whoops.
Don't give me away.
[laughs]
Do you have a pen?
JACKIE: Great.
Then you can do that, and then I can run lines with you.
So you've got-- it's a two member team.
[music playing]
SHERRELL: Oh, you're just making Miranda human again.
You really tapped into the fact that she's a wounded woman.
And-- and-- and I-- and I think the jealousy with Chloe comes
from the fact that--
that Miranda never really wanted children.
She was running away from abusive parents and, um,
a series of abusive boyfriends.
And, uh, when she met Chloe's father,
thought that because somebody loved her and wasn't
beating her up that she owed them something.
And he wanted a family, but she never wanted one.
Oh, open your present.
You-- you used to squat like that when you were a baby.
It was so-- [laughs] It was so funny and so strange.
Jackie, get up.
Get up.
We're going.
JACKIE: What?
RACHEL: Come on.
It's time to go.
JACKIE: Thank you. - Sure.
JACKIE: Bye.
RACHEL: We have squatter's rights.
She can't do shit for like, six months.
If we start casting now, that's two weeks, a month to rehearse.
We want at least a two month run.
That's fine.
She was so sweet, though.
No.
No, Jackie.
She abandoned her children.
She's not s--
Dodge.
[footsteps]
OLIVIA: I made you a vision board.
It's my vision for you look because if you could actually
be very pretty.
It's my girl, Queen of Hearts.
Don't touch that.
Those were my grandfather's.
Where are you from?
The Village.
No.
My ancestors are French-Hatian.
Your dad's Asian.
Right?
Yeah.
Why don't you know your roots?
Because I don't know my dad.
That's why you're acting all intense about your grandpa
being dead.
And you miss your mom, which is why you hang out with girls
were lame enough to get a 12-year-old high.
I'm 13.
Cool.
OLIVIA: What are you looking for?
Here.
These ones are a little harder to use,
but they're better for the environment.
Do you have a pad?
Ew, no.
Those things are like diapers.
You've never used a tampon before, have you?
Um--
It will change your life.
Here.
Take off the plastic.
Come on, do it.
Here, on three.
Uh, I've got it.
Thanks.
OK, Miss Modesty.
Good luck.
On three.
One, two, shoot it up there.
Did you get it?
Yeah.
Great.
Now wash your hands.
[music playing]
CHARLES: Hey Dodge, your mom's on her way!
[music playing]
The wiser I become, the more debased.
"De-based", debased?
[crying]
OK.
That was great.
Thanks, Rodney.
Good job.
Yes.
We'll be in touch.
Does the scene feel weird?
No.
It's not the scene, it's the actors.
Dad could pull it off.
But it's just a little intense to do it over and over again.
Woo!
So hot.
Hey, you got a sec?
Yes, hi.
I'm so sorry.
I wanted to apologize for the other night.
Jackie gave me a Starbucks gift card to apologize,
and explained to me about your dad.
I get it.
Thanks.
Were normally very on top of it.
Totally.
Listen, can I talk to you about this credit card stuff?
[phone ringing]
I'm actually the executor.
Oh, shit.
It's the morgue.
Sorry.
I'll take it.
I got it.
This is Jacqueline Gurner.
Go ahead.
So you-- you know about this debt, yeah?
Because you and your sister's names are also on the account.
Yeah.
That's the company card.
It's not that much, right?
Um, maybe we're talking about a different company card.
I don't think your support group rentals are
paying all the bills.
Listen, this-- this can be put on a payment plan.
So just take a deep breath, OK?
But there is one other thing.
Um, it's not a big deal.
But the theater's license has expired by two years.
Look, look, it's an easy thing to fix.
OK?
So I already printed out the forms for you and your sister.
I just need your signatures right there.
You need the owner of the building's signature.
Only if you want an audience in here.
OK.
Cremation's scheduled.
Jackie, I need you to text Sherrell and tell her
that we want to hang out.
OK.
Thank you.
Finally.
Grab that folder.
Oh, by the way, I'm doing taco night tonight.
And Olivia wanted to-- - Amazing.
--invite Dodge.
Oh, great.
That works out perfectly.
I have plans.
And yeah, that-- I think she would really like that.
She's allergic to dairy, and she doesn't
like things that are green. But--
RACHEL: Jackie! - Got it.
Cool.
Coming!
Bye.
All right.
If there's any way you guys can come back tomorrow
same time, that would be amazing.
Thank you so much. - Oh, sure.
Ooh.
I hope you guys can do something nice for yourselves today.
Thanks.
[music playing]
Well-- um, welcome.
Is everything all right? - Yeah.
Yeah.
Just wanted to see how those scenes were going.
Good, thank you.
This is so fun.
It's so fun, all of us together just hanging out,
Three Musketeers.
Oh, I already got you, so I might as well get you.
Woo!
MAN: Sherrell, could I invite you to set?
SHERRELL: Oh. - Is that you?
Let's go.
JACKIE: Um, will I miss anything if I pee?
[scream] No!
No!
My baby!
Mom!
Who would do this?
Everything's OK, baby.
Everything's fine.
I'm sure-- I'm sure she just got hit by a car
and crawled into the garden to die.
DIRECTOR: Cut! [bell ringing]
OK.
So that's not what we talked about, but fine.
WRITER: No, no, no, no.
It's not fine.
She completely rewrote that scene.
SHERRELL: It didn't mess up any of the plot points.
And we felt that Miranda--
DIRECTOR: We?
SHERRELL: --would want to protect her daughter.
DIRECTOR: Who's we? - Wait.
I'm sorry.
Who are you? MALE ACTOR: Morning, everyone.
Whoa. No, no, no, no, no.
This-- this woman is actually a safety issue.
- Oh, I'm a safety issue? - You darling, are a psychopath.
I don't know if you remember what happened, but--
OK, listen, haircut. You do not talk to her that way.
SHERRELL: Yeah. - How dare you?
This is a woman. - OK.
How dare you talk to her that way?
She is the smartest person I know.
She has more talent in her little finger
than you have in your entire body.
I am so appalled with the way they treated you
after you saved that scene.
Little window into my life.
Yeah.
[knock on door]
I'm so sorry to bother you.
But I have Michael here for you.
Hi.
Can we talk out in the hallway?
I am not reshooting this.
Rachel, I really feel like we should be focused
on Dad's cremation right now.
I can't leave.
[sigh] What are we even doing here?
You don't even like her.
You think she's a B-I-T-C-H.
Who said that?
Hm.
They're putting me in a coma.
What does that mean?
SHERRELL: They say it's only temporary,
but that's the way they kill people off.
I don't want you to think that this is your fault.
It's not your fault. They're trying
to appeal to a younger audience.
But that's bullshit.
It's that little shit, Damien.
I mean, you rewrote that scene.
He would rather kill Miranda off then come up
with a good storyline for her because he can.
I can come up with a good storyline.
I-- I can do that.
We can come up with something that's very current.
And then if they say no to it, you just call them out
for age discrimination.
They can't fire you.
Oh, that's perfect!
And we can pitch it at the anniversary party tonight.
Perfect.
Well, we have plans tonight.
So--
Oh.
Oh, my god.
You saved my life.
You are the best.
Oh, and if your plans change, you could join us later,
sweetheart.
All right.
So let's think.
Let's put on our thinking caps.
Oh, what-- what if we do a denying the gay character
a wedding cake storyline? - I'm going to go.
RACHEL: Miranda we're out of her coma and suddenly she's--
she's a conservative baker.
And she is not going to give that guy his cake.
And he's played by a younger character, than that involves
the younger characters and it--
it's very current-ish.
Oh, oh, oh, that's--
that's interesting.
But a baker-- they just wouldn't want me to be unattractive.
OK.
Just keep thinking.
Keep thinking.
We're on to something.
Yes.
OK.
SHERRELL: And I'll get rid of the rest of this blood.
[music playing]
Where have you been?
You look really good.
You look good.
And.
Here you go It's a Pino.
I'm sorry, it's just all we have.
I love Pinos.
Oh, good.
So what did you want to, uh, talk to me about?
Her daughter, Dodge, is a patient of mine.
- Oh, of course. - Yes.
She's really been missing you.
It's been a very hard week for her, very hard.
But we are seeing each other on Thursday, aren't we?
Mm-hmm.
She respects that you have other clients,
but she's just still needs to feel like she's
a priority in your life.
Miss Gaynor--
Gurner.
Uh, I'm not at liberty to discuss my patients
in front of my wife.
We can go in another room.
[laughs] How old is your daughter?
She's 12.
Oh, what a tough age. Huh?
Mm-hmm.
We don't have kids of our own, but we
do have two nephews who live in Tucson
that we don't see near enough of.
I keep telling him.
And just every time that my sister posts a picture of them,
I literally melt. Get this.
OK, so they love Batman more than anything else
in the world.
But they're not old enough to pronounce it.
And so they say Bahma.
[laughs]
That's funny.
Uh, it's not uncommon for children
to develop an attachment to their therapist.
And I take responsibility for thinking that you could handle
a more casual rapport with me.
But I do think it's in her interest at this point
to find another therapist.
I'm really glad that you were picking up on those signals.
Because that's actually why I came over here,
was just to tell you that you are unfortunately fired.
So we won't be needing your services anymore.
And, um, thank you for that.
Thank you for your time.
And you are very pretty.
You're pretty.
Thank you.
What did I tell you about fucking your clients' parents?
It's pedestrian.
Right.
[music playing]
[cell phone buzzing]
Hey, Jackie. What's up?
JACKIE (ON PHONE): Hey, Chuck.
Does anyone call you chuck?
No.
Well, they should.
What's-- how's my kiddo?
CHARLES (ON PHONE): She's doing great.
She's out there kicking Olivia's butt at, uh, cards.
You want me to have her call you later?
Well, I was actually wondering what you were doing.
And I was wondering if you wanted to get
a glass of wine or something.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Listen, uh, I'm
just going to hang here with the girls.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, actually-- you know what?
When I think of it, today is actually not great for me,
either.
Because I've got to get a massage.
So I--
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Check in later.
Yeah.
Why don't I check in later?
And you guys have fun.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Um-- - Yeah.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Maybe all four of us could do something.
Awesome. CHARLES (ON PHONE): Sounds good.
OK. Thanks, Chuck.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Yeah. - Sorry.
Thanks, Charles. CHARLES (ON PHONE): For sure.
Sure. - OK.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): OK. - Bye-bye.
CHARLES (ON PHONE): Bye.
[music playing]
RACHEL: What do we know about Miranda's family history?
Just that she was left on the doorstep of a nunnery.
REBECCA: Sherrell!
Where's the network now?
I have young fans.
Hello.
hello, hello, hello, hello.
Oh, you're twins.
Oh, you're adorable.
What's your name, cutie?
Um, I'm Rebecca.
But this is for my grandmother, Ruth.
She's like, your biggest fan.
Evil twin.
Right?
Miranda can die or stay in a coma or whatever.
But you come back as her super with-it evil twin.
Who orchestrated the whole thing.
You were the reason she's in the coma
because you were always jealous of your sister.
[gasp]
And now is your chance to have everything
she always had that you always felt like you deserved.
This is brilliant!
I've always wanted to play a bad guy.
Fuck your grandmother.
Just getting into character.
Oh, you can't wear that tonight.
That's good.
No, that's me.
Hm.
Hm?
I feel like what I'm wearing is fine.
It is fine.
But why have fine when you can have fabulous?
OK.
Pick out anything, anything you want.
This?
OK, honey.
Um, I see that you're a lot like me.
You're in control.
You know what you want.
You're ambitious.
I'd love to see you in something that shows a little bit more
of that power.
Take off your clothes.
[music playing]
You have no taste.
[music playing]
Wow.
Mm-hmm.
You sure about this?
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
You look fabulous.
We look fabulous.
[music playing]
Oh.
CHARLES: Dodge, it's your call if you want to invite your mom
or not.
No.
Absolutely not.
OK, hang on.
If our parents liked each other we could be sisters.
You do not want my mom as your mom.
What do you like about her?
Is she nice?
Too nice to the wrong people.
So she has a big heart.
Is there anything you like about yourself that you
think you got from her?
Loyalty, I guess.
Is she funny?
Not on purpose.
As someone who didn't understand how cool their mom
was until she was gone, I think you're being a little harsh.
Can I ask what happened to her?
[cell phone buzzing]
My love, my heart, my princess.
No.
Uh, you know, I have one other thing earlier.
But I'm-- what time is it?
I'm going to make it work.
So my mom's coming from an event,
which means she'll be dressed in a very intense outfit.
She has a great singing voice.
My dad knows how to play guitar.
They'll totally fall in love.
To our potential sisterhood.
Yeah
Oh.
[music playing]
[chatter]
PHOTOGRAPHER: This is boring.
Let's get a kiss.
Yeah.
Don't they play father and daughter on the show?
Some people will do anything for attention.
OK, it's our turn.
Oh, no.
No, no.
Come on.
Come up and smile.
PHOTOGRAPHER: Sherrell, who's your friend?
Let's get another one like that.
Sherell, is that your sister?
SHERRELL: Oh, I don't think so. PHOTOGRAPHER: Oh, I don't know.
SHERRELL: Well, ma-- maybe.
Oh, we miss you already.
This is red carpet only.
Oh, no.
No.
I'm with them.
That's my--
Oh, so great to see you again.
You look amazing.
That's my mom.
Sherrell is my mom.
All right, ma'am.
I'm Jackie.
The regulations entrance is right over there.
She's-- can I get in that way?
These are twins I just met in line.
Hello.
Hi.
Did you get me one of those?
This?
Yeah.
No, they only gave us two.
But I don't want it.
It's fine.
I don't need it.
What are you wearing?
Oh, you made it.
Hi.
So this is the one I was telling you about.
She is totally brilliant.
You kneed Brant in the gonads.
She can be a little intense.
Intense can be a good thing.
Why don't you grab us a couple of whatever the cocktail is?
So anyway, what I was telling you is that she [inaudible]..
Really?
Party on.
[music playing]
[party chatter]
RACHEL: You don't have to kill off your older characters
to keep your show current.
You just need to be reflecting the current reality.
You're smart.
Isn't she great?
Because the younger generations,
they want to see dynamic women.
And they want to see older women.
Well, not older, older.
RACHEL: But the point is, Miranda is someone
we only know as a mother, and as somebody's ex.
Right? We know nothing about her.
But with the evil twin character,
you have a real opportunity to flesh out this three
dimensional, deeply flawed--
But in a sexy way.
I like that.
JACKIE: Good evening.
Good evening.
Here are your drinks.
The bartender is a B-I-T-C-H, for the record.
Where did you go to school, Rachel?
I got into the University of Chicago.
RACHEL: Yeah, but you didn't go.
Was unable to attend.
Have you ever considered acting?
You really have a face for television.
Oh.
Maybe the evil twin has a daughter, like actor, writer,
mother, daughter duo.
That's good.
Then you guys can start an evil empire.
Cool.
Jackie seems to be enjoying the open bar.
Where were we?
Oh, right.
Girl power.
I just think you should have a female character on your show
who isn't perfect.
But in an appealing way.
Sexy works.
Sexy is important.
DODGE: Now you want to hear all the things
I don't like about my mom?
She's always late.
I'm pretty sure she can't tell time.
She's overly emotional and needy.
She pretends to have hobbies, but never
actually learns to do anything.
She wants to be part of everything
until she has something better to do.
And then she's like, oh, sorry.
I forgot.
CHARLES: You ever thought about talking
to your mom about how annoying she is?
No.
No, I can't.
You sure?
You keep pressing this kind of stuff down,
it festers and it grows.
And before you know it, you are doing
something you really regret.
Like what?
CHARLES: Take a look.
Stronger on my knees.
Oh.
[laughs]
That's kind of homoerotic.
Try play intramural basketball with that shit in your back.
Yeah, that's what I did instead of talking to my dad.
Are you going to get a face tattoo
instead of talking about mom?
Are you going to go?
[door slams]
I'll go.
[dance music playing]
[party chatter]
Don't lean on that.
There's nothing behind it.
Oh, I know.
You can't--
- Jackie. - Sorry.
What the fuck are you doing?
I'm s-- I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
That is not safe.
Just-- that it's really, really dangerous.
Stop doing that.
Stop.
Stop it. That's enough.
Come on. - I just spilled on the dress.
Stop that.
Take that off, please.
I'm going to.
I think I can get it out.
No, Jackie, not here.
This is public. Go in there.
Don't push me.
Here.
I think it'll come out.
It's that cold water?
Yeah.
OK, just because you can't put water on that kind of material.
No, Rachel, you c--
don't put soap on silk.
Yeah, I know.
It's my dress.
Oh, that's right.
I'm sorry.
I forgot that everything is yours.
You know, The Fellowship, Mom, and you're an actress now.
Yay!
That's so fun for me.
I'm just trying to make sure that Sherrell can keep her job,
so that we can keep our home, so that you and your--
Will you stop trying to pretend like this is about us?
You don't give a fuck about us.
We have a year to figure it out.
I'm the one who told you that.
And I was wrong because we inherited a bunch of debt.
Why don't I know about that?
Because, Jackie, I can't trust you with shit.
[knock on door]
That's setting.
Just let me do that, please.
I was doing it fine.
I wasn't doing anything that you weren't doing.
You have no idea how selfish and controlling you are.
I'm selfish?
Yup.
I didn't get to go to college because you had a baby.
[knock on door]
And I'm selfish?
Occupied.
That is so fucked.
Nobody made you stay.
It was your choice.
You wanted to do it.
Let me ask you this, Jackie.
If you see a person repeatedly walking into traffic,
are you just going to be like, they're cool, they'll be OK?
You're saying I'm a blind person?
I have had a messy life, and I know that I'm not
getting it all right.
I know that.
But I'm a nice person [crying] and that counts for something.
I know trying to control all the people around me
in order that I could feel OK in the world.
And I love you, but that's what you do.
I miss my dad.
[music playing]
Oh, Jackie-- well--
oh, oh, there you are.
Where did you disappear to?
Michael is very into our pitch.
He wants us to come back to his place and keep talking.
I have to talk to you about something.
Well, can it wait? Michael's waiting.
No.
My dad died.
Oh, my.
Oh, oh, I'm--
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry, Rach--
It's OK.
I just need you to sign this.
Oh.
Well, what is it?
It's a permit for the theater.
Oh.
Oh, thank god.
I switched business managers, and I was so worried
that there would be a problem with the payment or something.
Easy, peasy.
What payment?
Well, the mortgage, the property taxes,
the expenses on the building.
I don't even know all what else.
I-- we set it up so long ago.
You were making those payments?
Well, I wouldn't expect your father to make them.
He was so committed to his starving artist persona.
And I would never leave you high and dry.
I'm not a monster.
What did Mel tell you about me?
That you were dead.
[music playing]
That's why it took you so long.
For what?
To come and find me.
P Sherrell, give us another one.
Oh, sure.
You were waiting for us to find you?
PHOTOGRAPHER: Sherrell, who's your friend over there?
But you left.
That's insane.
That's an insane thing to say.
Can we not talk about this right here, right now?
Do you know how any idea how fucked up I am because of you?
Every person is responsible for their own life
and their own--
Not children.
Parents are responsible for their children.
Listen to me.
You have no idea what it was like.
He couldn't stand my getting work or having friends or doing
anything that didn't involve taking care of him,
and you, and your sister.
I was so depressed.
I could barely breathe.
He convinced me that you were better off without me,
and I believed him.
I just didn't feel like I had a choice.
You did have a choice.
I needed you.
[MUSIC - ARTHUR RUSSELL, "I COULDN'T SAY IT TO YOUR FACE]
(SINGING) I couldn't say it to your face,
but I won't be around anymore.
MAN: Hey.
You looking for something?
I think I got it.
RACHEL: No.
That's so not OK.
MAN: Your loss.
Fuck you.
Fuck you!
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) I needed a place
so I walked in the door.
I couldn't say it to your face, but I won't be around anymore.
Hi, baby.
Can I sleep here tonight?
Is it OK with Charles?
OK.
I love you.
[door slams]
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) In my arms you, girl,
you won't be here to say I'm wrong.
I couldn't say it to your face, but I won't be around anymore.
I needed some space so I walked out the door.
I couldn't say it to your face, but I won't be around anymore.
Hey.
Get up.
We got to go.
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) I heard them say maybe someday
I'd have to pay.
JACKIE: Let's go, Rachel.
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) I don't
say one word to let you know I'm going away.
I couldn't say it to your face, but I won't be around anymore.
[crying]
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) I needed a place,
so I walked in the door.
I'm not doing that scene right now, Rachel.
ARTHUR RUSSELL: (SINGING) But I won't be around anymore.
Just give me a minute to set up.
Thank you.
We'll be in touch.
Thanks.
Can you just send the next guy in?
What do you want me to say?
No, what?
What do you want me to say?
Should I make something up?
Should I go away?
Then tell me what you want me to say.
That you're proud of me.
[laughs]
(SINGING) Gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Going for me, gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be bikie lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no no, no, no, no, no--
[laughter]
--yes.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
[laughs]
[music playing]
Honey, thanks for giving me an us day.
Being without my baby made me so sad.
How's that ice cream?
Oh.
It's fine.
Want some?
No, honey, I'm good.
Whew!
I'll have a little baby bite.
Ah!
That is heaven.
Yums.
Thank you.
I need to talk to you.
OK, baby.
What is it?
I think you are a bad mom.
I think you can be a good mom if you apply yourself.
OK.
And stop drinking.
Yeah.
Baby, you know, it's tough with grown ups.
Because I've been mourning and it's a little fuzzy upstairs.
But I hear you.
I hear you.
It's on my radar.
What else?
Stop throwing yourself at men?
No.
I don't think I do that.
I don't do that.
I'm sorry, Bunny.
I think I just wanted you to have two parents because I
didn't have that.
And maybe I just need to focus on you having one parent.
I need you to buy me tampons.
Don't say anything.
You want to finish this?
Now it's all drippy.
Speaking of which, when you got your period was it brown?
Oh, my god!
- Because when I got my mine-- - Mom!
No! - -- it was brown and chunky.
I can say that. You came out of this body.
Oh, Jesus.
[music playing]
I'm so sorry.
So I did some thinking, and I figured out a way for us
to keep the theater for the play if we rent out
a couple of rooms, we set up a payment plan.
We'll have enough money to get through casting,
and then assuming the play's a huge hit,
you, me, and Dodge will find a new place.
That's it.
It's me and you, kid.
We can do anything.
That all sounds really great.
I knew it. I knew it.
But I don't want to do the play.
What do you mean?
I think I need to get a normal job so I can figure out
how to pay for my own apartment and, like, date,
and have friends.
I'm your friend.
I know.
I have to learn how to be an adult now,
or it's never going to happen.
Well, what am I going to do?
I think that's something you get to figure out for yourself.
OK.
[music playing]
REPORTER (ON TV): And the golden retriever pulled it off.
This piece is a little unexpected.
We're having a mocktail party.
- Dodge. - Yeah.
OLIVIA: Look.
REPORTER (ON TV): --only to make a scene "Time Will Tell"
50th anniversary gala.
I guess time will tell if they end up a happy family or not.
Sweetie, I really don't think you want to meet this woman.
She's my grandmother. I have a right to meet her.
Should have told her.
Ladies, if I--
I want to go it alone.
No, Dodge, that's--
I don't think that's a good idea, sweetie.
--a really bad idea.
Guys, just let me have this.
OK.
All right.
Wait.
Olivia, stay.
Yeah, come on.
OK.
[knock on door]
They were in there for a long time.
Right? - Yeah.
- I'm going to go in there. - I'm going to go.
You're looking at your new landlord, bitches.
Yeah. You better be nice to me.
What does that mean?
I'm always nice to you.
SHERRELL: She won it-- card shark over there--
oh, of course, it will have to be in your name until she's 18.
But I want her to have it.
[music playing]
You've done a very good job.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
Do you girls have plans for dinner?
Because I have some great ideas for some plays for me.
[music playing]
[chatter]
You OK?
Why don't you take the night to yourself?
There's no rush.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
I got this.
I love you.
Don't get me crying.
Do something nice for yourself. Cut those toenails.
OK.
[music playing]
RACHEL: Celia!
Celia!
You run like a girl!
Sorry.
I was-- Hi.
Hi.
Rachel.
I was just trying to neg you.
Yeah, now I remember.
Um, if you're still single I--
I would love to have you over for a-- a drink or--
Do you still live at that theater?
I'm on my way out.
I'm good.
I'm kidding.
[laughs]
Oh, OK.
Do you want to go over to my house?
Right now?
Yeah, why now?
Yeah.
Um, I just have to get my bag.
OK.
Don't run away.
Do you want to come with me?
No, you stay here and I'll get my bag.
- Uh-- - OK.
You come with me.
[laughter]
[MUSIC - PAUL AND THE TALL TREES, "ONCE IN A WHILE"]
MAN: (SINGING) Once in a while, what could I say?
I thought out love was bona fide.
But too, my eyes have cried.
Once in a while, once in a while I lose it.
So have mercy.
Have mercy on me.
Go easy.
Have mercy.
Have mercy on me.
Go easy.
Have mercy.
Have mercy on me.
Go easy.
Have mercy.
Have mercy on me.
Go easy.
Because the two of us will someday die.
[MUSIC - JOHN MORAN, "MAKE IT WITH ME"]
MAN: (SINGING) There's a name written
on my door and it's mine, could be yours if you really want it
and more.
More.
I'm a mind for security, so have you.
Don't you see, you could lay all your troubles on me?
Me.
Put all your cares away.
Leave them to fade away.
Let them go flying.
I don't mind always being there for you to come and tell
your troubles to, to.
Put all your cares away.
Leave them to fade away.
Let them go flying.
[MUSIC - MANDY PATINKIN, "RAGGEDY ANN"]
MANDY PATINKIN: (SINGING) And a one, and a two and--
Going for me, gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no,
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Going for me, gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no,
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
He's your raggedy Andy, it's time to come clean,
a fingerless man in an atomic dream.
And his hair his bright, bright green.
Oops, I mean, red.
I mean, my Raggedy Andy, you know what I mean?
My pudgy little friend with those black-eyed beans.
And his legs are striped like a candy cane.
Only for me he goes, gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no,
yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Going for me, gobbly gobbul obbul obbully gumbo,
be biki lie bye biki lie bono.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.