, never Kool Aid ♪
♪ Sippin' on D'Usse, psych ♪
♪ Came a long way from G'burg ♪
♪ Puttin' in work like Ferg ♪
♪ New York, to L.A., Hawaii and Japan ♪
♪ I'm the man, least I'm feelin' like I am ♪
♪ Got the whole wide world in the palm of my hand ♪
♪ But don't give a, I'm Sam I am ♪
♪ What that even mean, I don't know what you talkin' 'bout ♪
♪ Why nowadays everybody got a palm out ♪
♪ PLP, yeah that be me, and that be what I rhyme 'bout ♪
♪ I have arrived, all you rappers are in timeout ♪
♪ RattPack, where you at ♪
♪ Everywhere worldwide ♪
♪ I know you been waitin' for this world to collide ♪
♪ B-O-double B-Y H-A-L-L and Folarin ♪
♪ 'Bout to take it back like Doc and Marty ♪
♪ Inside the DeLorean ♪
♪ I am no historian, but here to make my predecessors proud ♪
♪ All you, not allowed ♪
♪ I put it on everything, I really want a cop out ♪
♪ But I did good for a drop out ♪
♪ Hop out the coupe, chicken heads go crazy ♪
♪ Gotta sound swag when the flow get lazy ♪
♪ What up, what good, where you at, what you been on ♪
♪ Anybody step into me, I promise they get, on ♪
♪ Better hop up on the train ♪
♪ 'Fore you miss the chance to ♪
♪ Hop up on the, hop up on the train ♪
♪ 'Fore you miss the chance to get on ♪
♪ Mixtape Bobby, that's the type of, I spit on ♪
♪ Woo ♪
♪ And it's on now ♪
♪ Everybody know that it's on now ♪
♪ I'll be damned ♪
- 107.9, Atlanta's home for hip-hop.
Night tracks is sponsored by Fye.
Get that futuristic high with Fye, coming soon.
And coming up, we're dropping--
- Okay, we got a biggie burger, wings,
two waters, y'all want sauce?
- Boy, you know we want that sauce.
- Yeah, we wanna get it real wet.
- Okay, 10.48, drive on up.
♪ Come on now, come on now, you gotta survive ♪
♪ I said you gotta survive ♪
Damn, now what you two little fine
rich girls doing eating here?
Whole Foods out of gas or something?
- We in the mood to get reckless tonight.
- You wanna turn up with us?
- Hell yeah.
- Let's go smoke out back, three ways.
- Yo, where you get weed from?
Yo, it's been dry as hell around here.
- Everybody's down bad.
You have no idea what we had to do to get this pack.
Come here.
- Whoa.
- Woo! - Spark it up, baby, yeah.
- So look, I'm working for this company
called Too Smack'd, it's like a app.
Like, that delivers snacks to weed-heads,
you know what I'm saying?
And it's called Too Smack'd 'cause like,
you smacking while you snack.
- Oh my god. - You get it?
Too Smack.
Y'all got me too high.
- You ain't really high until you hit this.
- That looks like a purge mask.
- Come on, baby. - Okay, a little bit.
- Are you ready, all right.
- Here's what's up. - What the?
- We're gonna go inside and you're gonna give us
all of the cash in the register,
or we're gonna deep fry your meat, cool?
- Damn, man.
Why y'all gotta go all Clermont twins on me like that?
- Our Xan dealer don't take Daddy credit card no more.
♪ Hey, hey ♪
- Well what in the sweet hell have you got going on?
- I got robbed.
- By who?
- Savages, they was big and it was a lot of 'em
and I fought 'em off for as long as I could.
- Boy, you know the first rule of working the night shift
is you can't leave the store unattended, bro.
These people out here are animals
and they will kill your mama for a damn egg sandwich.
Now I gotta go back here and see if we got
the damn thugs on the videotape.
- Video?
- Roger, man, let me impeach you on a little wisdom, man.
If you wanna be in charge,
you've got to follow the rules, bro.
You gotta be a sheep but not a outside sheep.
You wanna be an inside sheep, 'cause outside sheep get ate.
A sheep, remember that at your next job.
- Next job? - Yeah, 'cause I'mma
have to let you go, man, you fired.
And I need that shirt back.
- Oh no, no, you can't, yo, you can't take this shirt.
I got a meeting at the bank and I need this shirt,
I left my shirt at home.
- The shirt is property of Zesto's,
I need that shirt back, man.
- Fine man, I'mma do my own thing anyway, keep the shirt.
- Man, what the hell is this?
- Ah, I left that in the pocket.
- I guess you had a hell of a night.
- No, no, that's mine, dog.
- It was in the shirt so I guess it belong to Zesto's now.
That shirt is horrible, undershirt dirty.
How you get ketchup on your nipple?
Bye.
Anybody else wanna get fired?
- Not me.
♪ I'mma do my thing coast to coast ♪
- Good afternoon, I'm Calvin, you Hayes?
My man. - Yeah, I'm Hayes.
- Can I get you anything to make the ride more comfortable?
AC, bottle of water, go to the back, get some loud?
- Did you just offer me drugs?
I'm gonna have to take two stars off your rating.
- Wait, for real?
- No, I'm just playing.
ATL is dry as dust.
- Yeah, it is.
- Why do you think I'm in this sketch park right now?
- Let's go to my office.
We are open for business.
This is that sky high, Mr. Hayes.
You hit this, you're gonna be staring
at the sky for three hours like this.
- On the contrary, that is bunk.
- You just gonna disrespect me like that?
- I've seen pocket lint that's better.
- Well go on and smoke your pocket lint, then.
Go on and smoke your pocket lint with your rude ass.
'Cause you ain't hurting my hustle.
Just my feelings.
Get out my car, Mr. Hayes.
- Really?
- Nah, I'm just playing.
You could've bought some weed, though.
- Every time.
Hello sir, may I borrow your shirt?
I'll give it right back, dog.
- Roger?
Hey, it's Alicia, from high school?
- Yo, yeah.
Wow, you look amazing, like Angela Rye amazing,
like Jemele Hill amazing.
- Okay. - You look good.
- I was going for Taylor Rooks,
but I'll give you points for trying.
- Good looking.
- So, how have you been?
What are you doing here?
- Trying to get a loan for my business.
- In that shirt?
That's a raggedy-ass shirt,
you look like you did a little army crawl to get here.
- It's a long story.
- Yeah?
Wish I had time to hear it.
This is my boss, I gotta go.
It was good seeing you.
I'll see you later.
- Aight, shy business lady.
Where are you, cuz?
We got our meeting at the bank.
- Oh baby, that feels so good.
Are you smashing right now?
- No, boy, I'm making mashed potatoes.
- Yo whatever man, just hurry up, dog.
- Bitch, I told you to get off the phone.
Your stroke ain't even that good.
- So your company name is Too Smack'd?
- Yep, it's an app where you deliver snacks to stoners.
- Do you have any collateral?
Something, you know, of value that could guarantee the loan.
- Oh, yeah.
Check these out.
These are good as cash.
I got Waffle House, man, this has like 6.50.
I got a IHOP, I got a Jiffy Lube,
I have like four or five on it.
That's good, right?
Man, I can't never count on you for nothing, never ever.
- Listen, stop pressing me, okay?
I told you I was cooking.
Oh, green eggs and ham.
- Man, shut up, man.
Yo, we missed out on a bank loan 'cause you did.
You really need to tighten up.
- Yes, and just because we cuz,
that doesn't mean I got to help you.
- You stay in my mama basement for free, what you mean?
- You stay in your mama basement.
- It's my mama!
- It's my auntie.
Yeah, fool.
- Ha ha, well, well, well.
Two brokest, mustiest boys I know.
Through here stankin', messing up the community.
What's up Calv, you here for the re-up?
- Hell no, I can't even give your dirty ass weed away.
- Whoa. - Count your blessing,
this is the only weed in town.
I had to mix that with oregano.
- Basil and cilantro.
- Talking about my weed, what's wrong with him?
- You got me looking stupid.
- Hey, Big Bang can't make nobody look like nobody.
Big Bang only make Big Bang look like Big Bang.
You got you looking stupid.
You know who I am?
You know who grass you on?
You know who almost property this is?
If it wasn't for the city owning it,
you know who would own this?
Big Bang. - Big Bang.
- You know why they call me Big Bang?
You know why, do you remember why they call me Bing Bang?
- 'Cause you the spark that started it all.
- Say it like it's the Pledge of Allegiance.
- 'Cause you the spark-- ♪ 'Cause you the spark ♪
♪ that start it all ♪
- Hey, hey, I ain't got no record deals over here.
- Come on, man. - You trying to get signed?
Only thing I sign is death certificates.
You hear what I'm saying?
Everybody know I started it all.
This trap house right here was a regular house,
and then I had them build it into a trap house.
It was nice and I said, why it look so nice out here,
tear it up, break it down.
This trap house is a monument.
- Monument.
- Commemorating washed up drug dealers.
- Washed up?
Heard your bitch ass got fired.
- How you know that?
- I know everything, I knew before you got fired.
You wanna come work for me, I got a grill right here.
I got a grill for him to come work on.
I'mma fire you too.
I'mma let you work half a day, then you outta here.
All these rappers out here, talking they been trapping.
They ain't been trapping.
2 Chainz, there wasn't no 2 Chainz.
He had no chains on.
I gave him one chain one day,
next day I seem him again there go another.
He's like, I'm 2 Chainz.
I smoked out with a dude named Mark Zuckerberg.
Smoked him out, he was like, I can't even feel my face.
What he do?
Make Facebook after that.
I introduced Jay-Z to Beyonce.
I introduced Whitney to Bobby.
But it was a time when they needed each other,
and then things--
- Man, we don't got time for this, man.
- What you got time for?
You wanna work?
Hey yo, Roger. - What?
- Remember Alby.
- What you talking about?
- I'll be at your mama house later.
- Aight look, right, check this out.
- Nope, next, mm-mm.
Look at her, cuz.
She built like Big Bird.
- Are you body shaming, bro?
How you gonna be broke and picky?
- Look, let me show you something.
Show you how a player I am, I'mma DM her, right.
- She read it, but.
- Man, how she gonna leave me on read, man.
She ain't even that cute anyway.
She needs to stop skipping leg day with her little ugly.
Roger, what was that?
- Nothing, Mom.
- Do I have to get out of my chair?
- No, Mama, stay in your chair.
- All right then, I'll stay in my chair.
- What is that?
Hey, look at this.
Get back, fool. - Grab that.
- All right.
- What's that?
- Some kinda weed bible.
Look like instructions for growing
some kinda super weed or something.
- Yeah, that's good, but we need to smoke
the blunt that's on front of it here.
- We don't know what that do.
- Who cares, Roger, don't nobody care.
It's better than the twigs we been smoking.
- That's true.
- Race you.
What, huh?
- Yo, what is happening?
- Oh, one, two, three.
I'm glad that's over with.
- The hell just happened, man?
- I'm freaking out man, we must be back on the west side.
- Somebody's coming, man.
- Oh shit, Roger, I forgot to tell you this.
I had a dream last week and this is how we both die.
- Who the hell are you?
- Yeah, identify yourselves right now.
Wait a minute, are we supposed
to have helmets 'cause y'all got helmets?
- No, we just hot boxing.
They look fly, don't they?
- Where are we?
- You just smoked yourself a one-way ticket
to a player's party.
- Players party.
- Who are you?
- It don't matter who I am. - That's right.
- It only matters what I know. - Tell 'em.
- That is the gas.
The loud pack. - That loud pack, ha ha.
- I ain't never seen nothing like that
in them little projects y'all hang in.
- Never. - This is so beautiful,
I just need a minute, y'all.
- Is this heaven?
- Does this look like heaven to you, fool?
Y'all wouldn't make it in anyway.
- Why are we here?
- Y'all found the Weed Bible, right?
- Right? - Yeah but,
what do we do with it?
- Goodness. - Learn how to grow some weed?
- Duh!
- This book could change human history
and obviously you both been chose.
- Both of you. - I knew I was special,
I knew it.
- Too soon, way too soon.
- Let me learn you little fellas something.
- Learn 'em something. - Marijuana's been
around since B.C. - You know what that is?
- Before crack, sure have.
- It's before Christ, man, before Christ.
- I got the before part right, though.
- Now that **** that y'all call loud,
we have another name for.
It was called sinsemilla. - Sinsemilla.
Give 'em something else. - Acapulcoco.
- Give 'em something else. - Kush.
- Give 'em another. - The purple.
And this right here my friend, is the ultimate bud.
It's gorgeous.
- It smells like angel farts. - Farts of an angel.
- What's it called?
- It's called...
- I wonder how you spell that.
- You smoke it, you don't spell it, dummy.
- Now this weed right here will give you
supernatural ability to fight off evil, dangerous things.
Make sure you protect this bible with your life.
- Your life, you heard him.
- Come on. - Go on, hit 'em one time.
- Hell, what year is it?
Who am I?
- Bruh, I feel like the universe just twerked on my face.
That weed is evil.
Let's hit it again.
- I feel you, but wait, that's how
we can get our money, cuz, with the weed.
- I'm in.
- Think about it, we try and get loans,
ain't nobody gonna give dudes like us a shot.
- I'm in.
- Ain't no weed in town right now.
- I'm in.
- And if we grow this, we can sell it
and make enough money to start our business.
- Bitch, didn't I tell you I'm in?
And you not listening, I'm in.
I am in, in.
Damn, cuz, I been selling weed, I'm just bad at it.
Look, I'm tired of being broke
and I'm tired of staying in your mama basement.
- What wrong with my basement?
- Ma, stop listening.
- Then stop badmouthing my basement.
- I'm sorry, Auntie.
Girl, you know I love your basement.
I love everything you do for me.
- All right then, Calvin.
- Let's grow.
♪ Dance with my dogs in the nighttime, woof ♪
♪ Trap, with the chickens like Popeye's ♪
♪ Money changing colors like tie-dye ♪
♪ I'm just tryna get it, I ain't tryna die ♪
♪ She got a big ol' onion booty, make the world cry ♪
♪ In the kitchen, wrist twistin' like a stir fry, whip it ♪
♪ Hold them bands down ♪
♪ Hold your mans down ♪
♪ Who told you come around, who ♪
♪ Get that trap sound ♪
♪ Designer clothes, fashion shows ♪
♪ Trap house made of gold ♪
♪ Control the bag now ♪
♪ No need to brag now ♪
♪ And put the mask down ♪
♪ We livin' fast now ♪
♪ Finest, finest grows ♪
♪ We can go, coast to coast ♪
♪ Watchin' me whip up, still be real and famous ♪
♪ Dance with my dogs in the nighttime ♪
♪ In the kitchen, wrist twistin' like a stir fry, whip it ♪
♪ Keep watchin' me whip up, still be real and famous ♪
♪ Dance with my dogs in the nighttime ♪
♪ In the kitchen, wrist twistin' like a stir fry, whip it ♪
♪ In the kitchen, wrist twistin' like a stir fry, woof ♪
- Hell no, man.
- All that work for nothing.
- Waste of damn time, cuz.
- Hell.
Oh hell naw.
What goin' on, cuz?
We gon' be rich.
We'd like another chance to win your business, okay?
Now, we done upgraded our product line.
Roger, show him what we got.
- Damn, man. - Exactly.
- That's what I'm talking about.
- This ain't just any weed.
We like to think of ourselves as the Apple of weed.
We're about to be in everybody's pocket.
- See this right here, it's all the case.
When you're tryna to turn up-- - Turn up.
- Turn down-- - Turn down.
- Turn your life around.
We ain't trying to pull up. - Pull up.
- Pull out. - Pull out.
- Or maybe pull over.
- Stop!
- Oh, damn.
- I think you oh damned a little too early.
Okay, okay, we gotta do this.
You gotta record this, 'bout to get this on WorldStar.
Landscape, fool, you gotta catch everything.
Hey man, y'all better watch where y'all going.
- You were at a stop sign.
- Yeah, it was my homeboy fault.
- What, let me tell you something,
you never apologize, okay?
There's three rules of living.
Rule number one, never apologize.
Rule number two, you never give out
your government name, okay?
Rule number three, you never throw out
cups that get free refills.
- What?
- I'm gonna snap you in half, you little punk.
My boss is gonna be really, really upset about this.
- Nobody give a damn about your boss.
Your boss can kiss my ass.
Is that Lil Baby?
- That's Lil Baby.
- What the hell going on man,
y'all see this big ass boat in front of y'all, man?
- Wait, wait, wait.
What if I offered you a truce?
- A truce, man, I don't need to do truces.
- Nah, we made it man, it's good ****.
- I'll tell you if it good **** or not, lemme see.
- What, what are you doing?
Gonna get your ass kicked.
- Shut up, look.
You see, look again.
All right.
- Hey man, I ain't gonna lie man, that's some good ****.
- I told you.
- Good ****, that **** strong or what.
What the hell we doing right here, anyway.
- Y'all hit us, Lil Baby, you wail-wail-wailed the ****.
He wailed it.
- Um, we hit your car
on accident. - Hold on, hold on, hold on,
y'all talking about this right here?
- Accident.
- Man, I ain't even trippin', don't even worry about it, man.
- For real?
- Yeah, it'd be a shame to be upset on such a beautiful day.
- We gonna get some fries, let's ride.
- Well, I'll be damned.
- I told you.
- Yo, why you still recording?
Don't nobody wanna see no video
of some guys becoming friends.
- Man, you don't get it, do you?
We supposed to fight those dudes
but the weed made us get along.
- That was incredible.
I mean, I've never seen weed do that.
This stuff has superpowers.
- Exactly.
- You know what?
We about to own this town.
Everybody finna be a superhero.
Let's go!
♪ Nobody got it like we got it, who you foolin' ♪
- My car won't start, goddammit.
♪ Business is booming and everyone want a Porsche ♪
♪ Now I can't find my wallet, no more contortion ♪
♪ Can't tell me nothing, I been making a fortune ♪
- Lou, how can I help you?
- I mean, I wanna enjoy my job, but I hate kids.
- Got the perfect thing for you.
♪ Business is booming, money be moving ♪
♪ We don't be losing, what y'all be doing ♪
♪ Business is booming, money be moving ♪
♪ Nobody sleeping on the job, got me snoozin' ♪
- Come on, for real? - Come on.
- Yo, what's up OG?
- All the goddamn people on the spot,
all up in my goddamn smoke box on my grill, man,
goddamn running crazy, boy.
You know what I'm talking 'bout?
- I don't know what he said, just show him the weed, man.
♪ Hope you ready for the boom now ♪
♪ All of my partners is busy ♪
- Roger, we are turning the block up, baby.
Told you it was gonna work.
♪ We 'bout to get some money ♪
♪ Hands in the bag like I'm holding both jokes ♪
♪ Business is booming ♪
- No one talks to me.
I think it's because I'm the only white kid
at a historically black college.
- Nah, you just lame as hell.
You gotta loosen up, brother.
- I just want people to see the chill,
charismatic me, not this anxious mess.
- You so anxious but this the weed
that's gonna calm you down.
♪ Nobody got it like we got it, who you fooling ♪
♪ Business is booming, money be moving ♪
♪ We don't be losing, what y'all be doing ♪
- Over here, this is where rich people live.
- Who the hell gave him the key.
- Now Quenton, you know I have to know
how dreadful was that outfit she had on?
- Honey, it was ugly and it was an outfit.
- What did you say to Portia?
- None of your damn business.
- What you mean, none of my business?
- What I said.
Ladies.
- Uh-uh, he's messy. - He's acting real funny.
- Man, when I tell you these bitches are wearing me out.
- We got what you need.
Take a whiff of that.
- Ooh, I'mma try, let you know how this work out.
I'mma go live my best life with this.
- Yeah.
♪ Blood, sweat, and tears running dry, need a donor ♪
♪ Hands in the bag like I'm holding both joke ♪
♪ Business is booming ♪
- I don't give a damn who--
- Get on over here, Quenton.
- Get in here. - Get your ass over here, boy.
- Open me up, cuz.
- How much we got?
- About this much. - Aight.
- I mean, this town so dry,
we're finna be making all the money.
I'm talking baby wipes instead of toilet tissue money.
I'm talking brand new car money.
I'm talking getting yourself out your mama basement money.
- What's wrong with my basement?
- Damn, she got some good ears.
- 'Cause you're so damn loud, man, come on, man.
- You know I love your basement, Auntie.
♪ We been getting all the money ♪
♪ All the money ♪
Oh damn.
- Aw damn, our super weed is gone.
They got the bible too, cuz.
- Damn.
ere's our ****?
- Boy you better slow down,
run up on my side house like that.
You wanna come around the front,
you wanna address me properly.
Come up talking their broken knees,
act like they having a Cracker Jack or something.
- Did you see somebody go in my house?
- Did I see somebody what?
Do I look like the house watcher,
or Big Bang the watchdog?
No, I watch no goddamn house.
I've just been sitting with Co-Sign
and these beautiful ladies, and this dude I don't know,
looking at that cloud up there shaped like the booty.
It's amazing.
- Ain't nobody worry about that, man.
Somebody went in my house and stole our whole stash.
- See, that's what happens.
Look at you, just decide you wanna
sell weed and start selling weed.
Can't just do that, you can't just sit down
at the dinner table and start eating without praying, boy.
You probably got ghetto taxed.
Probably, that ghetto tax real.
- You took it?
- Did I say I knew anything about it?
I'm just saying, maybe things like this wouldn't happen
if you showed Big Bang some respect.
- Respect, respect, here you go talking about respect.
- Yeah, like Aretha. - Bro, that's all you
ever talk about.
Yo, we don't owe you nothing, bro,
this man act like he invented selling weed.
- I'm telling you.
- Ain't nobody else invent selling weed but me.
I been trapping since before trapping was trapping, aight?
That's what I do.
You ever heard of Selma?
- Yeah, I heard of Selma.
- Yeah, that's why they call it Selma.
I used to sell my weed down there.
They was marching for that,
and other things important in the black community,
but we was part of it.
- Yo man, we get it, you old as hell, bro,
but where's our weed at?
- Who you calling old, you seen my outfit?
Boy, I'm fresher than zest.
Boy, I'm so fresh, people don't say, take a shower.
They say, take a Big Bang.
Lemme tell you what y'all should do.
If I was y'all, which I never y'all,
'cause I don't wanna be standing there
looking up at Big Bang like, please,
Big Bang, help us, who stole our weed?
If I was y'all, this is what I'd do.
Search around, you're looking in the wrong place right here.
Go down there, ask the Asian people down there.
You ain't asked them?
The white people over there,
being got all their windows blacked out.
- We didn't check the white people.
- You ain't even see, they go in and out the house.
They could be in there murdering people.
I'm not saying that they stole anything,
'cause that would be racist.
I'm just saying, check the,
what you do is check the high school.
Oh, them high boys down there, they got no respect.
All they looking for is somebody to get.
They got the face all day.
Maybe they got your ****.
- Is that a booty cloud?
- No, look more to the left.
- Damn, booty cloud.
- That's the booty cloud, woo!
- Yo man, why you wearing that stupid-ass hat?
- What's wrong with it?
I used to wear it back in the day.
You gotta understand, cuz, we gotta blend in.
Come on now, gotta trust me.
- Come on, man.
- Come on, twizzler head.
Students, please report
to the buses for the Verdant Biokinetic field trip.
- Aight, now check this out.
We looking for kids with clean kicks,
'cause that mean they stole our stash.
- Bet you they did, I bet you they did.
Oh snap, it's McMullen. - Yup, McMullen.
- Oh, I did not know he was still the principal here.
- He is. - He can't see me.
Can't see me.
You know he's still mad at me.
- You know why.
- Bro, it was a senior prank.
- Man, you smashed his wife.
- On his desk.
- While the PA was on.
- Oh, I'mma be on the honor roll now.
- What the!
- Can I get, a swirl.
It's a souvenir. - I hate that hat.
- Listen, the kid has gotta wear pants,
that's not up for debate.
Coochie king.
Oh, it's on.
- Hey man, why is it so quiet?
- Like, don't nobody wanna skip class, man.
Yo, Wesley Snipes.
- Oh my god.
- Damn, what happened, skirt? - Poor kid.
Oh my god, what your face?
- Goddamn, these kids.
Oh.
Come on, man, we're about to get robbed.
You don't wanna rob us, we broke.
- Would you mind taking our picture, sir?
- Huh? - We just got a A
on a science project and we wanna text our mom.
- Take a picture?
- They kids, man.
- Don't you ever reach for your damn jacket like that,
put your phone in your pocket.
I almost knocked y'all the **** out.
- Sir. - Yep.
- He called me sir.
- It's the braids, I done told you.
You smell that?
- Right here, right here.
Pot, we're going in that door
and we gonna get them punks, come on.
- Yo, Mr. Crandall.
- Oh, Jesus.
- Can we get high?
- You guys scared the piss outta me.
Why are you not on the field trip?
- Boy, that boy high as hell.
You don't remember me?
It's Calvin. - Roger.
- Hold up, lemme do my move.
- Calvin, yes I remember you.
- What's up! - You graduated?
- I mean, you know, I walked across the stage.
- You walked, yeah for sure. - I was there, you know.
- So what's up?
- We got a little neighborhood business that, you know,
me and my cousin have started up, right, you know,
'cause we trying to change our life around,
'cause I graduated, right?
Some of our business supplies have been misplaced
and it was brought to our attention
that some of the people who might have misplaced them,
they probably go to this school,
so we just wanted to say hey, you know, speak to 'em.
- So you guys are dealers?
Somebody copped your product.
- The whole stash, man, they took the whole thing.
And this smells rather familiar.
We was wondering if you could help us
find out where you got it, 'cause you know,
it's kinda hard to come by now, you know?
- You're telling me.
Dealers all over town are completely sold out.
It's like somebody's buying in bulk.
Open a friggin' chronic Costco.
Found this canister earlier in the cafeteria.
I haven't seen it before,
but let me tell you, it is dank as fudge.
- I smelled it.
- What he say?
- I don't know.
- This smell like angel farts, this is our stuff.
- Looks like Russians, talk to Ivanov.
They're in the Magic Kitty, strip club downtown.
- Russians steal everything.
They done stole our election and done stolen our weed.
- Calvin, I know you're in the building.
I found your hat.
If I find you, my friend, you're going down hard.
- Told you not to wear that stupid hat, man.
- It's my favorite hat, cuz.
- Sounds like you guys need this more than I do.
- I do, 'cause I'm going down.
- You homewrecker!
- Here you go.
- Come on, man, grab me some.
The gym, gym.
- Dang.
- I told you if you ever
stepped foot in this school again
I'd beat you senseless.
- How's our wife?
- That super weed made you fly, cuz.
Dunked on your ass.
Uh-oh, what's going on?
- Come on, man. - What happened?
What happened to my power?
- Out of the way, move, move, move.
Calvin!
Damn it.
- That was crazy.
That weed got us high for real.
You always got me doing
- Can't believe we alive, cuz.
- Man, get your ass up, man.
- Time to go to the strip club.
Man, can't believe I lost my hat again.
- Perfect.
- Alicia?
Yo.
- Roger?
- What's up?
- Hey.
- Ha, ha.
- This is my--
- Sorry, I got bugs in my mouth.
My name's Calvin. - Cousin Calvin.
Anyways, this is where you work?
- Yeah.
- It's dope.
- So are you guys with the kids?
- We um, volunteer chaperone at the school sometimes.
- Uh, people left their kids with you guys?
- Yeah.
- What about that?
- I'm just playing.
All right, you guys are gonna get the full tour,
and don't fall asleep like you used to in class.
All right guys, my name's Alicia Harmon
and this is Verdant Biokinetics,
so let's start with my favorite part of the tour,
employee lounge where there's free soda and snacks, come on.
- What is you doing?
We ain't got no time for no full tour.
We ain't got time for no drinks, Roger.
You forgot, we go to strip club, the Russian?
- Yo, the booty club gonna be there.
You see that lady up there?
Yo, just let me finesse this real quick
and it's gonna be all good.
Plus, she said there's free soda, so we all Gucci be good.
- Don't nobody give a damn about no drinks, Roger.
You know what, they better have liters in there
'cause you sound thirsty as hell.
- Man, shut up.
- Founded in 2013, Verdant Biokinetics
makes everything from rocket biofuel
to nutrient-dense baby formula.
- Well, I hope they don't mix up
the baby formula and the rocket fuel.
Babies gonna be blowing up all over town.
- We're working to improve the mind,
the body, and the world.
- Hello.
- Oh, and look, there's our CEO, Miss Ana Cheever.
- Hey, everyone, sorry to interrupt.
I just want to say how happy I am
that you're all here today to be part
of our inner city youth outreach program.
Alicia is helping us to be a fully woke corporation.
- Woke?
- You're all so brave and so beautiful.
You have such bright, bright futures ahead of you.
And just remember, don't do drugs.
Unless, of course, they're one of ours.
I'm kidding, I am kidding.
- Thank you for that, Miss Cheever.
Let's give it up for her.
- This lady is wack.
I'm finna go find me a place to smoke, I'm out.
- Why don't we head into our VR room,
where you guys can fly with bees
through real honeycombs, yeah?
- Access granted.
- You figure it out?
- Oh yeah, you know, I'm math as hell.
Yo, so, what happened to the tour?
- I left them in the auditorium with a science movie,
so you know, they're probably
all diddling each other by now.
- I like science movies.
- I bet you do.
- What's up with your boss like,
crying about the inner city kids, dressing like Erykah Badu.
Is she like, serious?
- Yeah, she means well,
but she can just be a real line-crosser.
That woman stresses me out.
- Word, yo, when I get like that, yo, I get high.
Yo, I actually got some, if you wanna smoke?
- I stopped smoking in college.
- For real?
Like, you never smoke?
- I guess, I don't know,
I just started focusing on my career.
- I feel that, I'm all about my paper too,
but yo, I gotta smoke, like I gotsta stay high.
- Well, you're cute, so you can do that.
See, this is what I'm talking about, the CEO needs me.
- I'll be here if you change your mind.
- Shouldn't you be with the kids?
- Kids, kids.
- Roger, it's this way.
- I knew that. - Uh-huh.
- Nobody in here.
Time to smoke my blunt.
Ooh, that too hard.
Nobody.
- Help me, help me. - Want me to help you?
Let me take your picture.
- Now, come on here. - Why you so strong?
Get off, I can walk.
- Yo, what's going on?
- Ain't none of your business, sir.
- It is my business, he's with me.
- Well then you need to come with me, too.
Come on, now. - You snitch.
You're stupid. - Come on, man, damn.
- Fye is causing some side effects.
- This is very, very bad.
These results are horrendous.
- Well, should we delay the launch?
- No, absolutely not, our stock price would plummet.
- Ow. - Try it, man.
- Sorry to interrupt.
- What is it?
- I found these two wandering around the halls
and this gentleman was in a restricted area.
- Who you calling a gentleman?
I am not not gentleman, I am a grown man.
- What's going on?
- These two claim to be with the high school
but none of the other chaperones has ever heard of 'em.
They say they're with you?
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
Yep, I'm taking them to lunch today.
They're actually community leaders.
- Oh, community leaders, wonderful.
- Calvin, Roger.
- Yeah, it's Officer Community Leader Calvin at that.
And Obama was a community leader.
- I miss Obama.
- He was a deacon at his church.
- We're gonna go.
- Take them to Chez Jane,
it's the best soul food in Atlanta.
It's on us.
- He only liked brown M&M's, did you know.
- Thank you so much, love you brothers.
know what I'm saying, giving us a ride
back to the whip and all that.
- Are you kidding me, you just gave me
an excuse to get out of the office.
Let's go get that lunch I just lied about.
- Uh-uh, we ain't got time, ma'am.
We're kinda in a rush.
Have you ever eaten at Magic Kitty?
- Yo, he's kidding.
We should go to Zaxby's or something.
- Well if you want the best wings, you go to Magic Kitty.
Let's go see some booty.
- Okay but look, there's a reason we gotta go, okay?
- We gotta go see some Russian gangsters, okay?
They stole our weed and we ain't really got a plan.
And you can die.
- Okay, well as long as I'm not eating
a boring-ass salad bowl at the mall,
I'm down for whatever, Calvin, let's go.
- You said you want a ride or die.
So that's what we're into, people that just wanna die?
♪ If you a bad chick, let me hear you say, yeah ♪
♪ Little booty, big booty don't care ♪
♪ You got your own car or your own crib ♪
♪ You said he calling but you leave him on read ♪
♪ Just sway wit it, sway wit it ♪
♪ Kinda geeked up, sway wit it ♪
♪ You see him looking, sway wit it ♪
♪ Sway wit it, sway wit it ♪
♪ Met a dude named Wes, said he checking for the best ♪
- Sup baby, you wanna dance?
- No, I don't really want no dance right now, maybe later.
But I know what you can help me with, though.
You know where I can find Ivanov?
- Sorry, I'm working.
- You working, oh but you can't find Ivanov?
- Hey. - Hey.
- I know what you're looking for.
- Where the hell my weed at?
- I got no need for your weed,
'cause I got so much money it's funny.
I got money.
Popcorn playa.
- Nigga just made it rain on me.
- These wings are so good.
- These breasts and thighs are good, too.
- Woo, go girl.
- Now that ain't courtship right there.
I hit the hundreds, cuz.
- Hey, buddy. - Uh-uh, I told you
I ain't want no dance.
- I heard you're looking for Ivanov.
- Yes, and tell him when you see him
I need to talk to him, the boss is here.
- He is not a he.
- What you talkin' 'bout, blondie?
- I am Ivanov, Irena Ivanov.
Let's go.
- Y'all heard the Terminator,
we gotta get the hell up outta here.
Let's go see what she's talking about.
- Okay, let's hear it.
Why are you coming in here and disrespecting my business?
- No, what's disrespectful is you're stealing our weed
and passing it off like it's your own.
- Calm down, Calvin. - No, ain't no calm down, cuz.
I'mma calm down when y'all give us our weed back.
- We don't steal weed.
You are wasting my time.
Bogdan, get rid of them.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, we're not here to cause any trouble.
- No, Alicia, ain't nobody scared of Thievin' Seagal.
You hear me, I'm about to go left and right like a--
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
What if I offered you guys a truce?
Y'all like smoking weed, right?
- Okay.
- Okay, okay.
Now we do business.
Hey, this is my design.
- Your design?
- This college kid, he come into my tattoo shop.
He say, "I want cool Russian tattoo."
But **** this guy, so I designed weak dick.
He must like, he put on weed jar.
- And what's the name of this kid?
- I don't know, but he have
red-black sweatshirt with pussy on it.
Pussy cat.
- South Atlanta College, right, yeah.
- I think we're going to school after all.
- You're not going anywhere.
- Okay. - Oh.
- What's going on here?
- We give you good information, now you give me something.
I want her.
- Me?
- You are classy hot, not like other girls.
I want to see you dance.
- I would like to see her, too.
- You work for me now.
- We need a plan.
We gotta get up outta here, y'all.
- Calm down, I got this.
- Your girl done did this before, yes she have.
- Man, shut up, dog.
- Go Alicia!
- Irena, Irena!
- Damn.
- Run!
- You crazy, the hell rose you?
Come on, y'all. - Let's go.
- What is you doing? - Come on!
- Let's go!
Girl, what was you doing in there?
- You said we needed a plan!
- We didn't say kick the Russian in the head.
- Ooh, damn, girl.
- Yo, I just feel like, we've been such
a bad influence on you, you know what I'm saying?
Like, if you need to get back to work
or whatever you were doing,
me and my cousin, really, we got it from here.
- I can't go, I literally can't go back to work today.
I'm high as hell.
- Which one of these students do you think smoke weed?
- All these kids smoke weed,
you're gonna have to talk to them.
Just gotta know what to say, watch.
Football players, which one of y'all got that weak dick?
Damn.
I didn't name it.
I didn't name it!
- All right, it can't be that hard to find a kid
who smokes weed on a college campus.
- I think I know somebody.
- Uh-uh, follow my cuz.
- Well, well, well, if it ain't Robbin' and Stealin'.
- Nah, it's Meegan and Steffi.
- Oh, hey, Zesto's,
what's up? - Oh.
- Sorry about what happened the other night.
- Hey, didn't you get our apology joint?
- Yeah, I got it, and I got fired.
But it don't even matter right now,
y'all need to tell me right now, who sells this weed?
- Right now.
- We don't smoke weed.
- Are you serious?
You're gonna tell me that right now?
With a straight face, after we just smoked a pound
in the back of your Benz the other night?
It was, they made me do it, it was weird.
- Boy you ain't got to explain yourself,
stop acting like that.
- I know, I just-- - He smoke weed.
Listen here, chocolate, vanilla, stop playing.
Where's our weed?
'Cause if you don't tell us where our weed at,
Alicia here gonna kick y'all ass, ain't that right?
- Mm-hmm, yup, yup.
You don't wanna, ha.
Don't test me, I already drop-kicked
one little goofy bird today, just like that.
- She don't look crazy.
- Yeah, you ain't scaring nobody.
Those pants are from J.Crew, I wore them to a bar mitzvah.
- Oh, okay, all right.
- Uh-oh. - Oh.
- Look here. - Okay, okay, okay.
This guy named Tobin, he's got the best weed these days.
- It makes you feel like Beyonce
riding a horse like, bareback.
- But I heard he's like, huge and scary,
so I wouldn't mess with him if I were you guys.
- Don't nobody care about that, okay?
I know krav maga, you hear me, you hear me?
Listen here, y'all ain't ready for this crane.
- So uh, where is this Tobin dude?
- He's sponsoring a party at Theta tonight,
but y'all can't get in, it's for frats only.
- Plus you guys, I really wouldn't mess with him.
He's like, the Soog Knight of Atlanta.
- Soog Knight?
- You mean Suge?
- Whatever.
- Ooh, y'all gotta stop watching black movies, okay?
'Cause you're ****ing up the culture.
- It's like the same thing.
- It's okay.
- Come on, girl, damn.
♪ Boy you got a problem better figure it out ♪
♪ All you selfie-taking naked gotta watch your mouth ♪
♪ I'm just a Midwest player with some balls from the south ♪
- Ooh, this thing lit.
Oh, they let everybody in here,
okay, I see what's happening.
- Where you think we gonna find the Tobin dude?
- I don't know, we gotta split up, baby.
I think I'm gonna go that way.
Ladies!
You ever met a guy who been to another dimension, okay?
♪ Ham, bank just dropped, I'm about to go ham ♪
♪ Pretty and the fly when they see me go ham ♪
♪ Shittin' too hard for the radio ♪
♪ I'm about to go ham ♪
♪ Ham, bank just dropped I'm about to go ham ♪
- Damn, I should've went to college, ooh.
What's up, baby?
Yes, yes, lady.
Can one of you ladies help me find Tobin?
Tobin, no?
Ooh, girl, that's why your wig stinks, don't do that.
- Hey my man, who you with?
- Oh, I'm looking for my boy Tobin, you know where he at?
Tobin! - I ain't ask you all that.
It's a private party, who you with?
- Oh, who I'm with, I'm from another chapter.
Minnesota, mm-hmm.
Theta all day, baby.
Theta all day.
- Hell yeah, Theta all day.
Theta all day, baby, okay.
We 'bout to step, we down a man, hop in.
- No, I got asthma, I can't really--
- Hop in, bro.
- Let me go use the bathroom. - Hey yo, we got one.
- Okay, later, later.
- So, you got a man?
- Roger, do you really think I'd be here if I had a man?
- Yo, I'm just asking.
- I love this song, let's go dance.
- Don't kick me in the head.
♪ Who told you you could walk in here like that ♪
♪ Who told you you could light up this room like that ♪
♪ Who told you you could kill all these girls like that ♪
♪ And every time they here you know you got that kickback ♪
♪ So you somebody, somebody ♪
♪ Ooh you somebody, somebody ♪
♪ Must be somebody, yeah yeah ♪
- Uh-uh man, what y'all doing?
Come on, get off me, brother.
I ain't come here for that.
- Yeah.
- Right now, this is where you wanna go?
- I got it, I got the wing, girl.
All right, I cover y'all back.
I'll be in the back.
Oh, you people are crazy.
- Theta flip, Theta flip!
- Come on bro, Theta flip, let's go, I got you.
- I got asthma, don't make me flip.
It ain't good for my heart.
- Theta flip, Theta flip!
Theta flip, Theta flip!
Ow!
I'm good.
- Damn.
- No harm, no foul, all right, I'm okay.
- It's our founding brother's ashes.
- You said it's who?
- Our founding brother's ashes, man!
- I got dead people all over me.
- Yo, that ain't no damn Theta.
Stomp that bitch.
- Move, they're trying to kill me, move.
Let's find somewhere to hide.
Oh yeah, let's hide in here.
Can I join y'all? - Come on.
- Oh. - Oh.
That is wrong.
- You just need Jesus. - Come on, cuz.
Get back here, punk.
- Where they at, where they at?
Check all the rooms.
- Man, I told you, stay low.
Now what we supposed to do,
tell me how we're supposed to find Tobin now.
Hey yo, let's go see
if Tobin got any more of that killer weed, man.
- See, I told you we gonna be straight.
Yep, that's our weed.
- It's a security breach.
Some scrawny dude with no dance skills and his friends.
- Scrawny dude, I'll fight that--
- Wait a minute, can't just go in there
all maniac style like that.
We need to have a plan first.
What weed we got left?
- We ain't got no damn weed, Roger.
We ain't nothing but shake.
- Hold up, remember when we was kids
and we had no weed then,
we snuck up on my mom, take all the little roaches
and shake, put it together, and make a super joint.
- I see what you're going for.
It's Captain Planet.
- Call on him. - Let's do it.
- Mr. Planet sir, we call on you today
because we need your help more than ever.
We was wondering if you could slide down
and help us out with some of that good-good.
- He ain't pick up, hang up the phone.
- Leave a message.
- Come on, let's go.
- Thank you, brother.
- That's it, bro.
- Are you guys okay?
- It's part of the process.
Trust me.
- Goddammit.
I'm okay, I'm all right.
- Damn fool.
- All right, now everybody be cool,
don't nobody make a move.
- Y'all didn't have to kick the door in, man.
It was open.
- Boy, if you don't get your Missy Elliott-body-having
ass out, boy I mow your ahh buh.
I'm talking about big top, little leg.
Look at him, you should've joined a sorority,
'cause you know why, you got
♪ Titties ♪
- Get his ass.
- Boy look at you, you got a check on your forehead.
I bet your tattoo artist in the third grade.
Good check, ugly.
- Get his ass.
We didn't come here to play.
- Right. - Where's Tobin?
- Sup, bitches.
- Wait a minute. - Oh hell no.
- I know you ain't Tobin.
♪ Business is booming, money be moving ♪
- Give us our weed back, white boy.
- No, no, I'm not giving anything back.
I've learned an important lesson.
That lesson is when you have amazing weed,
everybody's nice to you.
Even if you're a nerdy white virgin.
I'm not a virgin, I've had so much sex.
- No, no, I know another lesson your ass
about to learn today, little virgin white boy.
When you steal people's shit, it's repercussion.
We coming back to cap that ass.
Alicia, whup his ass. - Wait,
can we not go there again?
- Hell yeah, and another thing is,
that tattoo you got on your arm?
It actually says weak dick.
- What?
No, no, the tattoo artist said it meant cool sex guy.
- Oh, sweetie.
- Get the hell out of my party!
Yo, I'm king of this frat now.
- What? - What?
- What the hell you just say?
- I'm just, I'm playing, it's a joke.
- Wait a minute, everybody shut up.
Everybody pause, stay there.
You know what, I'm tired of y'all.
We superheroes, and you know what?
When our superpowers kick in,
♪ Ain't no telling what we gon' do ♪
You don't wanna see this.
Uh, Roger, what's your superpower,
'cause I think mine diarrhea.
- What is he doing?
What?
- What happened?
I smell dookie.
- You don't need to worry about that.
Uh-huh, did y'all see that?
Did you see that, did you saw that masterpiece, huh?
We ain't playing no games,
no telling what we do when our powers kick in.
- Yo, that's not our Weed Bible, look at this.
- Kama Sutra for Small Men?
- Give me my book back.
- Oh. - Whoa.
- She be hitting you from the back?
- That's normal.
- What you got going on, what kinda fraternity is this?
- Where's our Weed Bible?
- I don't know what that is, I just bought your weed.
Some dude sold it to me for cheap.
- What dude?
- I don't know, some dude going on about a booty cloud.
- Big Bang.
- He can have that.
- Now we smoke our finest brother's ashes in his memory.
- Thetas.
- Oh.
- I guess smoking dead people really works.
- What's up, negros?
in downtown Atlanta, brought to you by Fye.
It's the future of high, it's Fye, launching tomorrow.
- I know everybody's excited about that.
- Trap house, there's so many wonderful things
I could say about you, but I don't feel like it.
- Big Bang, where's our Weed Bible?
- What, what you talking about?
- We know you got it, because Tobin told us.
- So Tobin told you I had the bible,
so just 'cause Tobin told you something, you believe Tobin?
- Where the bible at?
- Okay, all right, yeah, I got it.
All right, I sold him some weed
and I ain't got none of the rest,
and I ain't got your bible no more, either, sold that too.
- To who?
- I don't know, some white people.
White people wanna buy stuff, you sell it to 'em.
Some company called
- Verdant Biokinetics?
- That, say it again.
- Verdant Biokinetics.
- Yeah, that's them right there, man.
They were all in a panic to get it.
They almost ripped my arm apart, some of 'em.
We all need it, we all need it.
And they paid me a lot of money, that's how I'm retiring.
Big Bang outta here, ha, bang.
- What would a big tech lab want with our weed?
- I don't know, they said they gonna make some like,
smart blunt, that's what it was called.
Fye, and it was fye, too, they let me try it.
It was amazing, nice clean burn,
fruity flavors, I think it's the future.
Although the comedown, it's a little bad, little shaky,
but hey, more weed better than no weed,
you know what I'm saying?
And they white people, why not trust 'em?
- And you ain't know nothing about this?
- I know they've been developing something for a while now,
but I don't know what that has to do with your Weed Bible.
- Grow house, the Weed Bible,
how you even know about all that?
- Man, I've been banging your mama for months now.
I saw everything.
- Bro, who up there smashing yo mama, bro?
- I don't know and I don't wanna know, man, turn this up.
- Ooh baby, look at him.
- Turn up the TV, man, come on.
I don't wanna hear that.
- Bang, bang, bang, bang,
bang. - That was you?
- Man, don't act so surprised.
I done told you a million times.
- I thought those were just yo mama jokes.
Wait, so, you taught me how to ride a bike.
It was at my fifth birthday party.
Are you my daddy?
- Hell no, I ain't your daddy, boy.
- Thank god. - Look at me.
- He's got a point, he got light skin
and you black as hell.
- I was just being nice to you.
That's what you do, you be nice to the kid
to get close to the mama, and she let me hit it.
- I heard that.
- Damn, your mama got some ears on her.
- We know.
- There she is, baby, ha!
So fine walking down those stairs.
- Hi, baby. - Hi, baby.
You smell good.
- I know.
Roger, listen, I told Bang to get your butt out that gang.
- Had to do it.
- And you, ooh.
- Did I do good,
did I do? - You did good, baby.
Ooh! - Oh my god.
Mom, I can't unsee stuff like that.
- Unsee this too.
You want to see it again? - No, I don't want
to see it ever. - I got tapes.
You should see the other stuff.
- Bang, why am I still carrying
this darn suitcase? - I don't know,
but you shouldn't carry nothing but my heart.
- And where's that whip of yours
you keep telling me about, it's a quarter past.
- Bang, there it is right there, look at it.
- Ooh, we done came up, baby.
- Bang ain't playing no games, got to go.
- Open my door for me, honey.
- I will.
- I'll be back in two weeks.
Don't you drink up all my Fanta, boy.
Hey Daddy, honey. - You get in there, sweetie.
- Oh, lemme get in here, ooh.
Get in, baby.
Work that thing, babe.
- Bye, bitches.
We rolling.
- Wow, so that's that.
- So um, this is where you guys live?
- Yes. - Yeah.
- Okay.
- If Big Bang took our bible and sold it
to that tech company, I'm thinking,
let's just go get it back.
I mean, Alicia, you work there, right?
So I'm sure it's no problem with getting
the CEO to hear us out, right?
- Well, hold on, guys.
Today's been...
I don't even know what today's been, but I can't do that.
We're talking about my job here, my whole career, no.
- So now you're a corporate girl.
Thought that place stressed you out.
- Yeah well Roger, no offense,
but you wouldn't know the first thing
about holding down a job.
- Yeah, I wouldn't know
the first thing, huh. - I worked my ass off
to get to where I am,
and I put it all on the line for you today.
- Just 'cause you work at some big fancy job,
that don't mean you better than anybody.
I ain't no bum.
- Okay, well why don't you just
say what you really mean, then.
- What I'm saying is, you look real strange
working for them people that stole our stuff.
I'm just trying to figure out what side you're on,
'cause right now you're looking like the feds.
- Okay, what I'm not gonna do is this, so bye.
- Bye. - Bye.
- Bye!
- Bye. ♪ Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye ♪
Hell's she saying.
Talking all that, where you going, cuz?
- I gotta fix this, cuz, you know that.
- Goddamn.
♪ Hey, hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
- Uh-huh, that smells real familiar, ma'am.
Why aren't you smoking your little Fye?
- I'm sorry, can I help you?
Oh, you're Alicia's community guys, supposedly.
- Yeah, and that's our weed.
- Oh, well congratulations.
My complements to the chef.
This is the best weed I've ever had.
You're doing a service to your community.
My assistant got this off the streets,
he got your little cookbook, too.
So there won't be any more of this.
- So you got our Weed Bible.
- Through a subcontractor, so it's all legit.
- Big Bang is not no damn subcontractor, okay?
He stole that from us, it's not legit.
- Oh, that sounds like a you problem.
Sorry, my ride is here.
My assistant, Hayes.
- Hayes, how could you do this to us, bruh?
- Sorry, bruh, I'm up for a promotion.
- I should've dropped your ass home.
- You should've binbied his ass.
- Oh, we didn't just buy your weed.
We bought everybody's weed
and what we couldn't buy, we just took.
So the town is thirsty now,
and guess who has the cool, refreshing answer?
Fye.
- Man, what you know about Fye?
- Oh, well according to the Urban Dictionary,
fye is slang for fire, as in, Fye is on fire.
- Yo, I knew all that woke **** was fake.
- Who me, fake?
Oh believe me, I am 100% woke.
You should be thanking me, I did you people a favor.
- You people?
- Fye has all the benefits of marijuana
while speaking to the modern consumer.
Bluetooth, Wi-Fi, syncs all your contacts, and it's legal.
There isn't gonna be a stoner in Atlanta without one,
and then the rest of the country.
Dealers go to jail, but I'm gonna be rich.
- I knew you was a snake woman, I knew it.
- Damn braids, man.
- Aw, sorry, not sorry.
I have a launch to get ready for.
Fye is the future of relaxation.
Here gentlemen, try some.
Much love, brothers.
- Fire her ass up.
- Let's go, Hayes.
- Yo man, I just can't catch a break.
It don't make no sense.
- Man, to be honest, cuz, forget the weed,
forget the Bible, we might as well just start over,
get a brand new hustle.
- Nah man, I'm tired of starting over with you.
It don't work.
We wouldn't even be selling weed
if you would've just showed up at the bank, dog.
- Man, I been hustling to help you with your dreams.
I don't give a damn about no snacks.
I'm just trying to be a good cousin, bruh.
And you know what, you gonna stop blaming me
for all your problems that go wrong in your life, man.
- I know you're not finna smoke that.
- Oh, this getting smoked.
- Shoot, my wig goddamn came off.
- Boy, you need to clean this room up.
- Yo, look at Roger over here sleeping.
Waste our time, let's get him.
- Baby Powder, what the hell you doing here?
- We heard about the Bible.
- Mm-hmm.
- I did what you said but it's gone now.
- It's gone. - I let y'all down.
- You didn't let us down.
You let the people down.
- The people.
- You screwed up.
I oughta knock the green juice outta--
- Thanks.
That was helping me a lot, making me feel better.
- Let me explain something to you,
see the Europeans-- - School him.
- They took the weed and they gentrified it.
- The saltine crackers.
- They came in and mixed it up,
put their own bells and whistles on it,
man, and made it they own.
- You listening? - And you gotta stop them.
- How?
The weed you gave me gave me superpowers, man.
Without that, I'm just a broke-ass stoner.
- Yeah, that's true. - Boy, that weed
didn't give you no superpowers.
- Boy, you not a part of the Avengers.
Ain't no Black Panther up in you.
But he right.
- But how?
I don't understand.
- You were just high.
None of that **** was real other than what you was thinking.
- Boy, just think about it.
- Goddamn!
- That weed ain't get you no superpowers.
- What the hell's he doing?
- All that other **** that you thought was happening,
that wasn't real. - Duh.
- Yes, you were just high. - Just high.
- The point is, it's not the weed,
it's you. - It's you.
- This is your destiny, boy.
- It's your job Kool-Aid head.
Save the weed.
- Save the weed.
- Save the weed, wait.
Wait, hold up, if the power wasn't real,
how am I talking to y'all two right now.
- Oh.
- You not talking to us.
It's all in your imagination.
You're sitting on the couch high.
You smoked 30 blunts, you bum.
- You bum. - Come on with it.
Come on, come on. - Ooh yeah, it's time.
- Come on. - It's time.
- Yeah. - Get him.
- Let it fly.
- Ha ha!
- Damn.
- Hey cuz, did a gorilla in a cowboy hat
come talk to you, too?
- What, no, Baby Powder did.
- What he say?
- He said we need to stop Ana and save the weed.
What the gorilla say?
- I don't know, he was speaking Japanese,
but you know what, Baby Powder is right.
We gotta stop her ASAP, cuz, 'cause I smoked that Fye.
- What happened?
- My body's still acting weird.
- Yo man, we gotta stop that leech, cuz.
- And there's only one way.
Assemble a team of pot heads.
♪ I'm on a mission and I won't stop ♪
- Oh, kids, party's over.
My dealer needs me.
Scram.
- Cheers. - Yes.
- Ooh, I got a text.
Hell no, they trying to take our weed.
- The hell you got going on?
- Oh, uh-uh.
Look, I'mma holla at y'all later,
I gotta go, I'll be back, okay?
- Where are you going?
- Baby, be your own gay best friend, hear?
♪ You only live once ♪
♪ Homies in the back so we gotta live it up ♪
- ****, boys, trouble, that damn weed need me,
I'll be right back.
♪ I'm on a mission now ♪
♪ But it's worth a shot ♪
♪ You gotta let me on ♪
- Somebody actually needs me.
♪ You gotta let me on ♪
- Roger.
- Thank for coming out. - Mm-hmm.
- We really need your help getting
to the press event tonight.
- Oh, so you just came here to ask me for help?
You're not gonna apologize for anything
that you said the other day?
- You called me a bum.
- Actually, you called yourself that,
but if the shoe fits, sweetie, wear it.
- Shoe fits. - Uh-huh.
- Yo, I'm sorry.
Did you know your boss the one who dried out Atlanta?
- Shh, you know how paranoid you sound right now?
Maybe you should stop smoking so much weed.
- I'm serious, she did it so she could sell
her new weed gadget without competition.
Yo, Fye is messing people up.
I got the pictures to prove it.
Look, Calvin got these.
These are the Fye test subjects.
I need your help.
- Okay, okay, and stop, stop, stop.
- Whether it's stress at work,
the bills piling up,
or the kids driving you a little crazy,
there's lots of times you wish you could get high,
but you just can't, until now.
Introducing Fye, the clean, safe,
totally legal alternative to weed.
Take it anywhere, from the beach to the boardroom.
Fye does it all.
There's no more need for weed.
Now, there's Fye.
- Hey, my name is Blake Johnston,
and when I need that futuristic high, I smoke that Fye.
- Uh, C. King, thank you.
- D. Nuhz.
- Now, please welcome
our founder and CEO, Ana Cheever.
- All right, thank you, yeah.
All right, all right, yeah.
Did you like what you saw?
You like it?
Okay, okay.
Marijuana is a problem in our community,
and making weed legal is not the solution,
but replacing it with something better, cleaner,
and safer is a solution, and we've done just that.
And it is Fye.
- All the weed in Atlanta is hidden somewhere
in this building and we gotta find it.
- Don't even trip, I already got somebody on it.
- My cousin.
- Attack your ass.
- Now, when I started my company
back in my dorm at my women's liberal arts college
where I studied--
- Uh, get your ass back, thanks.
- Let's do this.
- You got it, babe.
- Babe?
She called me babe, she called me babe.
- I heard, I heard.
- Other than that, my vision never--
Technology bring the world together.
Oh, that is not part of the presentation.
Technical difficulties.
Can we get this fixed, please?
- Thanks, Ana.
Hi everyone, my name is Calvin
and this here is my cousin, Roger.
- Uh my mic, can you get my mic back on, please?
- And we came here today to stop Verdant
from destroying one of the greatest
American institutions, marijuana.
- Can we get security up here, please?
- Check it out.
I don't believe this.
- Get it in there.
- Oh.
- Child, you oughta see
all the weed they got in there.
- That's at least a gram.
- Weed is not the problem. - Talk to 'em, cousin.
- The man is the problem.
Actually, in this case, the woman--
Y'all women.
- Security, please?
Security, please?
- Yo, we're dying out here, we need that smoke.
- Hey Jasper, how much longer?
- A goddamn rush job like this
Gotta get it right, the weed gotta be
Talking about, you feel me?
- Uh, two minutes?
- Weed is natural, okay?
It's not some machine that you could just plug up
into the wall to get a charge up, no, no.
This woman over here is turning
y'all into junkies for profit.
Fye is not fly.
Look what it did to me.
- I had nothing to do with it.
- Look at it.
Yes, weed coming from my nipple, this is what Fye did.
- I told you not to smoke that ****.
- Bro, my nipples be leaking, bro.
- Move the meat,
boy that goddamn meat better move, boy.
The goddamn smoke gotta goddamn fill up
- Real weed.
- Come on, y'all.
- Real weed.
- Real weed, real.
- Let's get back to the presentation, shall we?
- Hold up, there's something very important
I want you guys to all know about my boss,
the wonderful, caring, community-minded,
super woke CEO.
- Alicia, thank you, finally someone's
talking some sense around here.
- My friend Calvin there,
he actually recorded something that you guys should see,
so let's just go ahead and hit it.
Oh, oh no.
Wait, no, no, no.
Okay, all right.
- Oh, we didn't just buy your weed.
We bought everybody's weed,
and what we couldn't buy, well, we took that.
Well, we took that.
Took that.
And guess what, the cool refreshing answer is Fye.
Me, a fake?
I assure you, I am 100% woke.
Dealers go to jail, but I'm gonna be rich.
You should thank me, I did you people a favor.
Thank me, I did you people a favor.
- You see, and my friends Calvin and Roger here,
they're the ones that tried to stop her.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- Hey man, get off me and go arrest a white woman for once.
Get off of me.
- You know what, I'm just gonna go.
- Why's y'all waiting, you didn't wait on me.
- Real weed!
- Real weed, real weed, real weed, real weed.
- Now, to celebrate the return of weed,
please welcome Blac Youngsta.
♪ Twerk, girl I wanna see you, twerk ♪
♪ I'll throw a little money if you twerk ♪
♪ I don't really think you could twerk ♪
♪ Twerk, if you broke go to work ♪
♪ Make that big booty twerk ♪
♪ Pop it, stop it, drop it, pop it ♪
♪ If I hit Alexis Skyy ♪
♪ I'm a, rocket ♪
♪ I ain't got no, heart ♪
♪ I can't be loyal to you ♪
♪ You weren't here from the start ♪
♪ Twerk, girl I wanna see you twerk ♪
♪ I'll throw a lil money if you twerk ♪
♪ I don't really think you could twerk ♪
♪ Money don't walk, I gotta go and get it ♪
♪ Shake that booty, I'll come visit ♪
♪ If you thick, I might hit it ♪
♪ Can I touch that booty ♪
♪ That booty, that big ol' booty ♪
♪ Shake that booty ♪
♪ Can I lay on the booty ♪
♪ Mike Tyson on the booty ♪
♪ Copyright that booty ♪
♪ Throw a xan we might act up ♪
♪ Kamikaze, 'cause you know we all strapped up ♪
♪ Your, she want me, 'cause she seen a nigga stacked up ♪
♪ But I can't keep her, I just want to beat her back up ♪
♪ Now I'm in the 'Rari switching lanes ♪
♪ Pull up to the street and they all know my name ♪
♪ Now I got a bag, and my baby chain swing ♪
- Yo, I'm sorry I ever doubted you.
I should've always knew you were ride or die.
- Yeah, well, this is the best time I've had in...
Actually, I don't even know.
- Me too, yo, so like, when we going out?
- Look at you, being all assertive.
- Well you know, we did just disrupt
a multi-million dollar corporation
and we saved weed, so I'm feeling kinda good.
- I bet you I can make you feel even better.
- You can make me feel better.
- Yeah.
- Goddamn!
- I mean. - Get a room!
♪ I feel good, I feel great ♪
♪ Hope you feel the same way ♪
♪ I feel good, I feel great ♪
- Yo, 2 Smacked, got a ravioli nachos
and a gumbo dog for you.
- Yeah, Roger, that you?
- Yo, Cecil dude, what's happening.
- Just in here starving, bro.
So you still out here tryna scrounge around
and be a delivery boy, huh?
- Nah man, actually I own 2 Smacked, bro.
- Word. - Yeah, we just closed
another round of financing,
putting our value over 150 million.
That's my whip right there.
- That's you? - Yeah, man.
- Wow, why you out here delivering the food?
- Ah, I just like staying connected to the customer.
You're the customer, I'm staying connected.
You're my last drop before we go somewhere special.
My girl just got upgraded to VP, so she earned a raise.
Ain't that right, babe?
- I'm waiting, babe.
- Gotta go, man.
Enjoy that.
- Damn.
I think I just got ate.
♪ All night I been watching you ♪
♪ So tonight you're leaving with me ♪
♪ I been waiting my whole life ♪
- Let's go.
♪ It's on now ♪
♪ We forever young ♪
- Let's go.
♪ Let me check your fouls ♪
♪ Two technicals but you beautiful ♪
- What are we doing?
- Make this thing fly.