1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,086 Pupa? Pupa! 2 00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:04,921 Where are you, ya snuggly little shit sock? 3 00:00:05,046 --> 00:00:07,382 Knock it off, Korvo. We're trying to watch Inlander. 4 00:00:07,465 --> 00:00:09,592 Yeah, it's the prequel to Outlander, 5 00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:12,595 and it's the only reason I haven't filled my pockets with stones 6 00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,055 and walked into a river. 7 00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,765 We're just about to find out the canonical explanation 8 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,434 for why they eat so much ass. 9 00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:19,686 I bet it's 'cause the Scottish countryside is freezing, 10 00:00:19,769 --> 00:00:21,271 so it keeps their noses toasty. 11 00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:23,314 The Pupa keeps putting bite marks in all my stuff. 12 00:00:23,732 --> 00:00:25,817 Look what he did to my serving spoon. This shit is teak. 13 00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:29,112 Ah! Korvo, why don't you just use the Find My Pupa app? 14 00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:31,948 I made it in my AP app class specifically for this reason. 15 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,034 I hate that app. I refuse to pay for the premium version, 16 00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:36,453 and the ads are all for antidepressants you can only buy in Poland. 17 00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:37,996 The free version still works 18 00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:40,248 if the Pupa's within a block radius, you friggin' dork. 19 00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:41,791 - Fine. - Found me. 20 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,001 He's across the street? 21 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:44,252 Company move! 22 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,882 Aw, poor little guy was probably teething. 23 00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,467 Look at him suck on that muffler. 24 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,218 Does baby like to suck on a muffler? 25 00:00:52,302 --> 00:00:54,012 Yes, he does. Ooh. 26 00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:56,473 Why does he keep breaking into this creepy abandoned house, anyway? 27 00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:58,016 Guys, it's not abandoned. 28 00:00:58,099 --> 00:01:00,393 This is where Glen lived, remember Glen? 29 00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:03,438 The guy you blasted into space after you indirectly shot him 30 00:01:03,521 --> 00:01:05,065 in the foot with a collectible bullet? 31 00:01:05,148 --> 00:01:07,067 Save these made-up stories for your Substack. 32 00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,736 We're standalone boys for life, no consequences, 33 00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:11,488 and all the violence is cartoonish. 34 00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:13,281 We might wanna remember Glen. 35 00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:15,617 He's probably plotting a revenge on us. 36 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,202 Yeah, right, from space? 37 00:01:17,285 --> 00:01:18,828 He'll be lucky to survive reentry. 38 00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,288 Yeah, he's probably just floating around 39 00:01:20,371 --> 00:01:22,123 because humans are so obsessed with gravity. 40 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,292 Once again, your co-replicant has it right. 41 00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:25,919 That Glen guy will never do anything to us, 42 00:01:26,002 --> 00:01:27,420 least of all a revenge. 43 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:30,673 We never, ever have to think about him ever again! 44 00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:59,661 ♪ Previously on "Silvercops" ♪ 45 00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:02,163 ♪ Shot Glen to space, met cops ♪ 46 00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:04,666 ♪ Had sex with cops ♪ 47 00:02:04,749 --> 00:02:07,210 ♪ Got betrayed by cops ♪ 48 00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,254 ♪ Met some friends, not cops ♪ 49 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:11,756 ♪ Betrayed them and joined the cops ♪ 50 00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,760 ♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪ 51 00:02:22,725 --> 00:02:23,852 I wanna see some hustle. 52 00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,478 If you wanna be Silvercops, 53 00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:27,814 you gotta know how to fuck, buck, and work your vehicle. 54 00:02:27,897 --> 00:02:29,357 Shit, I meant truck. 55 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,734 Y'all could stand to be a little more like Dodge here. 56 00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:33,653 This guy embodies fuckin' and suckin'. 57 00:02:33,736 --> 00:02:35,029 Crushin' the game, Dodge. 58 00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:37,282 Who? Oh, right, that's my name now. 59 00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:38,950 Yes sir, Sergeant, sir. 60 00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:40,994 Yo, Charger, new recruit shuttle's about to land. 61 00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:42,078 Remember when that was us? 62 00:02:42,203 --> 00:02:43,496 You mean, three days ago? 63 00:02:43,621 --> 00:02:45,874 For my species, that's like 10 days. 64 00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,208 Let's go haze their asses. 65 00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,252 Nah, I gotta buff my hover muffler, 66 00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,713 or the hovering won't make that woo-woo-woo noise 67 00:02:51,796 --> 00:02:53,423 that sounds so cool when you drive it around. 68 00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:55,675 Playing it cool, I see how it is. 69 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:59,304 That makes me wanna win your favor, like, 3% more. Nice! 70 00:03:01,764 --> 00:03:04,934 - Listen up, you silver scum. - Let 'em know! 71 00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,769 Today your real training begins, 72 00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,189 but most of you slime ain't gonna make it through boot camp. 73 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,774 - Tell 'em! - Because Silvercops have to be tough. 74 00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:13,526 Tough like my girlfriend's titties. 75 00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,320 And how do we measure toughness? 76 00:03:15,403 --> 00:03:16,988 I actually don't know. 77 00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:19,866 It all comes down to the Final Trial, 78 00:03:19,949 --> 00:03:22,243 the most brutal competition of your lives. 79 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:25,914 Only the best and strongest will move on to the next phase 80 00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:27,582 of becoming a Silvercop. 81 00:03:27,665 --> 00:03:29,375 That sounds final as hell. 82 00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,377 The rest of you, you get sent back 83 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,129 to your shitty little lives 84 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:38,051 and your shitty little non-Silver families in Silver shame. 85 00:03:38,134 --> 00:03:39,177 Kill yourselves. 86 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:42,138 - Too far. - Okay, little overboard. 87 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:44,057 Uh, hi. I'm Tomblr. 88 00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:46,768 Crundle Tomblr, but on Xorathios, there's so many Crundles, 89 00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:48,353 I just go by my last name. 90 00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:51,105 I'm gonna shut up now. What's your name? 91 00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:52,774 Dang, why can't I stop talkin'? 92 00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,817 What the hell you think this is, recruit? 93 00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,236 A frozen dairy social? 94 00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:59,906 Oh, shit, he's cookin' with lactose now! 95 00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:02,200 Uh, yes, sir. I mean no, sir? 96 00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:03,826 Drop and give me 20. 97 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:07,330 - I didn't bring my wallet. - Push-ups, you piece of shit! 98 00:04:10,541 --> 00:04:12,210 Hidey-hey-hey, Solars! 99 00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:14,379 {\an8}What's the meaning of this front yard gathering, neighbor Kevin? 100 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,005 {\an8}Why do all these kids look British? 101 00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:19,384 {\an8}They're rich! The wife and I got our kids into Burberry Academy. 102 00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,386 {\an8}Um, I think you mean Booberry. 103 00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:24,180 {\an8}Burberry's the best preschool in the tri-state area. 104 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,306 Let me rub it in a bit. 105 00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:26,891 Whoa, look at those parents. 106 00:04:27,016 --> 00:04:29,519 Now these are a couple of PILFs. Schwing! 107 00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,271 Solars, meet Alex and Alex. 108 00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,730 Their kid's at Burberry, too. 109 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:35,650 {\an8}Our little Alex has blossomed since she got into the Burb. 110 00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:38,903 {\an8}She can bake a tarte tatin, and she has a Letterbox account. 111 00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:42,615 {\an8}Her review of Frances Ha was nothing to laugh at. 112 00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,158 {\an8} 113 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,326 {\an8}That sounds stupid. 114 00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,911 {\an8}Our Pupa doesn't need any of that shit. 115 00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:49,038 {\an8}Last week, he brought home a possum. 116 00:04:49,163 --> 00:04:52,166 {\an8}This Booberry Academy sounds awesome, and the parents are so sexy. 117 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:53,501 {\an8}I can't stop schwinging. 118 00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:55,211 {\an8}Yes, your pelvic thrusts are very noticeable, 119 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,130 {\an8}but does the Pupa really need more education? 120 00:04:57,213 --> 00:04:58,423 {\an8}He's already a supercomputer. 121 00:04:58,506 --> 00:05:01,718 Oh, my God, is your ugly son eating a car 122 00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,803 instead of socializing with the other children? 123 00:05:03,886 --> 00:05:07,307 {\an8}- Scandal! Wow, Pupa's got such a sense of humor. 124 00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:09,559 {\an8}That kid is a, well, he's a regular Jay Leno 125 00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:11,227 with the cars, isn't he? 126 00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:12,854 Okay, it's official. 127 00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:15,315 The Solar Opposites are getting Pupa into Burberry Academy. 128 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,650 Just 'cause you do a little aside like that doesn't mean we can't hear you. 129 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,027 What? 130 00:05:20,361 --> 00:05:22,530 {\an8}Our campus is state-of-the-art, 131 00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:26,159 with amenities both modern and inspired by nature, 132 00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,702 like our freshwater stream. 133 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,040 Our 250-year-old Wisdom Tree. 134 00:05:33,833 --> 00:05:36,210 Oh, my God, these book nooks are so adorable, 135 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:38,004 my zovaries are bursting! 136 00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:39,464 Do you see this? All the kids in a line, 137 00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,174 doing the same thing, none of them acting weird. 138 00:05:41,257 --> 00:05:42,258 Pupa needs this. 139 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,302 Our Pupa will attend this school. 140 00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,095 {\an8}I'm afraid it's a rigorous process 141 00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,765 {\an8}to get one's child admitted, and unfortunately, 142 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:50,808 {\an8}the deadline was yesterday. 143 00:05:50,933 --> 00:05:53,644 {\an8}I feel like you could have told us that before you took us on this tour 144 00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,813 {\an8}and got our mounds all juiced up, you know? 145 00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:59,567 {\an8}We could always put your child on our "interest list." 146 00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:01,944 - Oh, we are interested. - Put us on the bloody list! 147 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:06,282 Yeah, that's a W for La Familia Solaropposita! 148 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:09,744 {\an8}Hey, uh, guess what, hot Alexes? 149 00:06:09,827 --> 00:06:11,871 {\an8}We're gonna be hanging out a lot more. 150 00:06:11,954 --> 00:06:14,290 {\an8}Our Pupa just got on the interest list. 151 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,375 {\an8} 152 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,168 {\an8}Oh, bless your little hearts. 153 00:06:17,251 --> 00:06:18,836 {\an8}The interest list is a lie. 154 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,963 {\an8}It's what they put people on when they're never getting in. 155 00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,673 Well, that can't be right. It's a list! 156 00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:25,551 We already declared this a W. We can't undeclare a W. 157 00:06:25,676 --> 00:06:28,471 You can't just waltz in and get admitted to Burberry. 158 00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,473 I mean, are you the son of anyone? 159 00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:31,974 Not technically, but I was replicated 160 00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,435 off a much larger Shlorpian named Rin Tin Torvo. 161 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,562 Well, if your last name isn't Jolie-Pitt 162 00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:38,022 or Knowles-Carter-Beckham, 163 00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:40,400 you're gonna be on that interest list indefinitely. 164 00:06:40,483 --> 00:06:43,903 And if your kid doesn't go to Burberry, what's the point of even living? 165 00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:46,572 - Ah, she's right. - Stop it, Terry. 166 00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:48,366 We can solve this with sci-fi. 167 00:06:48,449 --> 00:06:49,867 Burberry doesn't want us, fine. 168 00:06:49,992 --> 00:06:52,328 We'll start our own crazy alien school. 169 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,247 We'll make it better and fancier than Burberry, 170 00:06:54,330 --> 00:06:56,791 and all these snooty fucks will want to get their kids in. 171 00:06:56,874 --> 00:06:58,042 They'll be so jealous. 172 00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:00,211 Oh, yas, yas, yas! Get out of my head! 173 00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:02,088 And Yum and I can be the teachers! 174 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,756 I was kinda hoping I could just sit this one out 175 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,633 and watch ramen-slurping ASMR videos? 176 00:07:05,716 --> 00:07:07,510 No, we're doing this together so we don't get a note 177 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:08,719 that we split up too much. 178 00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:10,680 {\an8}Ugh, fine, you're such a Karen! 179 00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:12,348 {\an8}Shut up, I am not. 180 00:07:13,349 --> 00:07:16,561 AISHA, do we have any sci-fi way to make an elitist school? 181 00:07:16,644 --> 00:07:18,312 Uh, yeah, I guess you could use 182 00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:20,857 the emergency Shlorpian training protocols for that, 183 00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,316 but they're kinda intense. 184 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,901 Alright, I didn't ask for your Yelp review. 185 00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:25,403 Oh, gimme, gimme, gimme. 186 00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:27,488 Here we go, let me just grab the sci-fi school maker, 187 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:28,948 change some of this baseline code, 188 00:07:29,031 --> 00:07:30,491 add some cool shit from that other school, 189 00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,452 and dah-dah-dah-dah-doo, we are done. 190 00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:39,542 Are you sure Glen will be okay with us building a school in his house? 191 00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,461 Like I care. Run! 192 00:07:47,341 --> 00:07:48,676 Schwing! 193 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,768 Good work, Charger, you're crushin' it. 194 00:07:57,852 --> 00:07:59,353 I'm sorta hyped out. 195 00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,730 Do you wanna grab lunch? 196 00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:03,983 Yo, Dodge, you gotta get in on this bullying. 197 00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:06,360 This turd's gonna have to spend a fortune on therapy. 198 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:12,533 Can you believe they let a filthy Holo sign up for Silver training? 199 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,584 What's your damage, Charger? You suck Holo butt? 200 00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:24,212 Shut the fuck up, Zobert. Don't make me kick your ass. 201 00:08:26,714 --> 00:08:29,008 Dirty trick, I should kill you right now! 202 00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:30,968 But I have to take a shit, and you know I need company 203 00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:32,762 so we can gossip while I dump one out. 204 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:35,056 That's why I'm leaving. And not because I'm scared. 205 00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,432 Come on, boys. 206 00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,684 - Oh, thank you. - Those guys are assholes. 207 00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:40,561 - Name's Dodge. - Wow, what a cool name. 208 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,979 It doesn't sound made up at all. 209 00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:44,398 - I'm Tomblr. - Also a cool real name. 210 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,984 Hey, just stay away from those dudes and keep your head down. 211 00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:48,861 - You'll be fine. - I'm just so nervous. 212 00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:51,948 It gets easier, just focus on training. Final Trial's coming up. 213 00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:57,203 Check out Silver Mountain, where Final Trial happens. 214 00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:59,288 It's also got some berry bushes that grow on the south face. 215 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,957 They're delicious on pancakes. 216 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,543 But mostly it's for the trial. 217 00:09:04,585 --> 00:09:07,713 {\an8}Mr. Korvo's Academy is the best preschool 218 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:10,299 in all four corners of David Attenborough's planet Earth. 219 00:09:10,424 --> 00:09:12,093 We have cutting-edge equine classes. 220 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,971 ...Seabiscuit was sired by Man of War and Jizz Nugget. 221 00:09:15,096 --> 00:09:16,764 STEM classes. 222 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:19,225 Watch out for those black holes, you little idiots. 223 00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,852 Our book nooks really make storytelling come to life. 224 00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:24,188 Come on, Jesus, I have to get you to the Pentagon. 225 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,148 I don't think we have time, Dr. Robert Langdon. 226 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:27,650 I'm losing a lot of blood. 227 00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,820 No, you're not dying for a third time, not on my watch. 228 00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:32,488 And this is our Giving Tree. 229 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,365 May I have an apple, please? 230 00:09:34,991 --> 00:09:36,826 Goddammit, I said an apple! Give me an apple, 231 00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:38,786 or I'll cut your ass down and then take them myself. 232 00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:44,083 And the last stop on our tour, the Office of Admissions. 233 00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:46,460 Okay, get your applications here. 234 00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:49,630 One per student, please, and grammar only counts if it's Kelsey. 235 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:51,090 Hello, Terry, Korvo. 236 00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:55,219 We're so, so thankful that you're considering little Alex. 237 00:09:55,344 --> 00:09:58,180 As trap king of admissions, you don't have to worry. 238 00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,807 There's no interest list here. 239 00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:03,853 KorKor, all these sexy parents are drooling over us 240 00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:04,979 like we're 3D-printed meat. 241 00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:06,564 Is this the best idea we've ever had? 242 00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,190 There was that one time we did needle drugs 243 00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,318 with the Charmin Bears, but otherwise, yes! 244 00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:13,237 And for the first time ever, no weird sci-fi side effects. 245 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:14,614 Suck it, consequences! 246 00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:24,081 This obstacle course will test your skill, 247 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:25,833 your strength, and your grit. 248 00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:27,376 Hit 'em with the headlines! 249 00:10:27,501 --> 00:10:30,421 If you don't finish in five minutes, you wash out 250 00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:32,923 and are disqualified from the Final Trial. 251 00:10:33,007 --> 00:10:34,342 That's stakes, baby. 252 00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:37,345 And your time... starts now! 253 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:47,355 You got this, Tomblr, move it! 254 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,899 What are you, fucking climbing experts? Come on! 255 00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:55,529 Oh, no, a little beam, it's so narrow! 256 00:10:57,907 --> 00:10:59,450 Steady. Steady! 257 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:02,078 I know you said I got this, but I don't think I do. 258 00:11:02,161 --> 00:11:03,245 Just one round to go. 259 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,420 - This is where we catch up. - I can't. I can't. 260 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,547 Hurry, man, you can do this! 261 00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,259 - Do you trust me? - I think so? 262 00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:19,178 - Then drop down! - But we'll wash out. 263 00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:20,388 - Trust me! - No! 264 00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,104 It worked! 265 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:29,980 First, but how? 266 00:11:30,064 --> 00:11:32,233 I realized the current was the quickest way to get to the finish line. 267 00:11:32,316 --> 00:11:33,859 There tweren't any rules against it. 268 00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:38,072 That's zarg shit! They cheated! 269 00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:40,700 They used their heads. You might wanna try it sometime. 270 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:41,826 Go off, pimp! 271 00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:43,285 - Woo-hoo-hoo! - We did it! 272 00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,246 We bent the rules to our advantage! 273 00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:46,789 - We did it, bro, yeah! - Woo-hoo-hoo! 274 00:11:50,459 --> 00:11:53,254 You know, I didn't think I'd bond with anyone out here, 275 00:11:53,337 --> 00:11:54,672 since I'm a Holo. 276 00:11:54,755 --> 00:11:56,382 Had some friends who were Holos, 277 00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:57,925 and the way the Silvercops treated 'em? 278 00:11:58,008 --> 00:11:59,051 Not cool. 279 00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,261 Well, growing up Holo, 280 00:12:00,344 --> 00:12:02,263 Silvercops always treated me like shit. 281 00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:05,391 Saw my dad get beat up for no reason so many times. 282 00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,435 One time, I saw him cry because they made him eat 283 00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,812 so many seeds that he shit his pants. 284 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,188 I hate 'em. 285 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,691 So why enlist? You trying to get back at them? 286 00:12:13,774 --> 00:12:16,110 I want to change the force from the inside. 287 00:12:16,193 --> 00:12:18,779 Revenge is worthless when you can effect real change. 288 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:22,283 Change over revenge, totally. 289 00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:29,498 {\an8}And you can always tell a star coming from the Milky Bone Galaxy 290 00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:32,877 because it smells like crickets and Aubrey Plaza's dry shampoo. 291 00:12:36,338 --> 00:12:39,425 Um, Jesse, are human eyes supposed to glow with milky power? 292 00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:43,137 Eh, it's probably from watching too many boat show fistfight videos 293 00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:45,181 on the Public Freakout subreddit. 294 00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,016 Okay, class, which constellation smells 295 00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,185 like Jessica Simpson's edible body wash? 296 00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:51,771 Trycloponz. 297 00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,397 Correct. See, they're fine. 298 00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:56,233 We pledge allegiance to Shlorp's grey god 299 00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:58,402 and humbly protect our station. 300 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:01,238 We protect the Pupa, terraform, 301 00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:03,991 and annihilate the population. 302 00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:05,367 No! 303 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:06,869 - Stop it! Shut up, shut up, kids! - No! No, no. 304 00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:08,287 - Did you teach them that? - No, 305 00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:09,872 I've never heard that pledge in my whole life! 306 00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:13,876 Everybody sit down now, class is still in session. 307 00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:17,087 Kill the threats, take over now. 308 00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:19,840 This is no bueno. We gotta tell Terry and Korvo. 309 00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,342 Yeah, right after my smoke break. 310 00:13:21,425 --> 00:13:24,887 Kill the threats, take over now. 311 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,430 Okay, let's go! 312 00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:32,645 - Recruits, hut! - I don't see y'all huttin'! 313 00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,688 This is it, the Final Trial. 314 00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:36,857 Only the fastest, toughest, smartest recruits 315 00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:40,194 will be victorious and move on to becoming Silvercops. 316 00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,321 Losers go home to their mamas. 317 00:13:42,404 --> 00:13:43,614 I love my mama! 318 00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:45,324 If you can't handle the heat, 319 00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,618 your armor has a tap-out button. 320 00:13:47,743 --> 00:13:51,497 But be warned, once you tap it, you're washed out. 321 00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,749 Good luck, future sons of silver. 322 00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:56,752 Hold on there, son. 323 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,629 - But the trial! - Listen to the man. 324 00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:00,172 We've been watchin' you, kid. 325 00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,676 Dominatin' practices, crushin' the competition. 326 00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:06,136 You got what it takes to be a Silvercop. 327 00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:08,389 You don't have to do the Final Trial. 328 00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:09,890 Trial's bullshit, anyway. 329 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,058 Bullshit, what do you mean? 330 00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:13,561 Nobody here ends up a Silvercop. 331 00:14:13,644 --> 00:14:15,104 They're too lowborn. 332 00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:18,399 Nah, we get our real recruits from the Silver Academy. 333 00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:19,483 That's the truth! 334 00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:21,026 But why all this, then? 335 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:23,904 - We gotta get our Silver Grunts somewhere. - Grunt life! 336 00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,239 What's a Silver Grunt? 337 00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:26,907 Food for powder, son. 338 00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:28,367 That means cannon fodder. 339 00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:30,911 The Silvercops keep the galaxy safe, 340 00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:33,455 but some planets just don't see it like that, 341 00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:36,667 so their population's got to be pacified. 342 00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:40,421 Bloody, gruesome fights with a huge death toll. 343 00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:43,340 Well, we aren't gonna waste Silvercops on that. 344 00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:47,136 - So, we throw in the Grunts. - They gonna die. 345 00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,722 Jesus, okay, my friend's in the Final Trials right now. 346 00:14:49,805 --> 00:14:51,849 He can't be a Grunt. I have to bring him with me. 347 00:14:53,475 --> 00:14:55,519 - There's nothin' you can do. - Facts! 348 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:56,979 Yes, there is. 349 00:14:57,229 --> 00:14:59,607 Whoa, kid, get back here! 350 00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,150 Don't throw your life away! 351 00:15:01,233 --> 00:15:03,319 No one turns their backs on us! 352 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,332 Get me outta here! 353 00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:20,920 Tomblr? 354 00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:22,296 Tomblr, where are you? 355 00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:25,841 {\an8}God, I love being a smug academic. 356 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,801 Ooh, I think I'm gonna give myself tenure. 357 00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:31,180 Yeah, I was built for more of a widow of a disgraced FIFA executive, 358 00:15:31,263 --> 00:15:33,307 but this is pretty cool too. 359 00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:37,269 What the hell are you teaching these kids? 360 00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,646 Just the normal stuff, 361 00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,481 and then they started attacking the parents. 362 00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:42,358 Do we know what the cafeteria is serving today? 363 00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:43,859 - Is it nuggets? - Terry, focus. 364 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,903 These kids can't be dragging away parents on campus. 365 00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:47,237 People will stop respecting us. 366 00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:50,574 Mother of Moby! 367 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,368 Those are Shlorpian soul harvesters. 368 00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,078 Wait, souls exist? 369 00:15:54,161 --> 00:15:56,080 What about God and the devil and all that? 370 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:57,957 They exist too, but they're all aliens, 371 00:15:58,082 --> 00:16:00,292 and I don't have time to explain how they mind-controlled ancient humans 372 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,710 into being their fuck buddies. 373 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,379 Point is, those harvesters suck out life energy 374 00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:04,797 and convert them into Shlorpian energy, 375 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,090 which is really just a different color energy. 376 00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:13,180 AISHA, we fucked up! 377 00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:14,848 All the kids are turning their parents into puddles of ooze! 378 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,600 I tried to tell you dummies. 379 00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:19,603 Those protocols are supposed to be for emergency use only! 380 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:21,689 But all those hot parents were an emergency. 381 00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:23,816 I couldn't stop schwinging, Terry gotta schwing! 382 00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:26,026 It's not for that kind of emergency. 383 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:29,822 It's more like if you're being attacked and you need an army to protect the Pupa. 384 00:16:29,905 --> 00:16:33,033 Ah, shit, we turned all those kids into Universal Soldiers? 385 00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:35,703 If y'all don't stop this now, those entitled-ass children 386 00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:37,413 are gonna take over the whole world. 387 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:39,748 Ah, why did we have to care so much about those sexy parents? 388 00:16:39,873 --> 00:16:42,334 Terry, replicants one and three, I have to come clean. 389 00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,919 I know I said I founded this school 390 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,213 because I wanted to be cool and hang with hot parents, 391 00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:47,881 but that was a lie. 392 00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:49,425 I don't care about the parents. 393 00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:51,552 {\an8}I actually wanted the Pupa to have a good education. 394 00:16:51,635 --> 00:16:54,304 {\an8}But usually you're just as shallow as me. What happened, babe? 395 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,640 When I was a young replicant, I was a narc-y little bitch 396 00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,934 who everyone hated, because I was stupid and lame. 397 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:01,603 It took me years of reading and educating myself to realize 398 00:17:01,687 --> 00:17:03,814 what a loser, asshole, shitbag I was. 399 00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:05,190 I wanted better for the Pupa. 400 00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:07,151 Oh, Korvo, it wasn't school. 401 00:17:07,234 --> 00:17:09,153 Everyone's a stupid little shitbag when they're kids. 402 00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:10,821 - Really? - Uh-huh, 403 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,865 and if you're not a shitbag, well, then you're a cumstain. 404 00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,825 - Or an asswad. - That's right. 405 00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:16,577 Fuck that school. Pupa doesn't need it. 406 00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:18,746 He'll grow out of being a piss-bubble when he's good and ready. 407 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,581 That does make me feel better. 408 00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:22,458 Even so, I still think we should stop those kids, 409 00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,126 or we'll have to go to so many funerals. 410 00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:26,962 I cannot put on more Shiva weight, let's go. 411 00:17:27,087 --> 00:17:28,714 Look out for those kids! 412 00:17:31,091 --> 00:17:32,301 We have to reset the school! 413 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:34,595 Blegh, their little hands are so sticky! 414 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,224 Tomblr! 415 00:17:39,349 --> 00:17:41,393 We're doing good, Dodge, just a little further. 416 00:17:41,518 --> 00:17:43,604 - We gotta tap out. - What are you talkin' about? 417 00:17:43,687 --> 00:17:45,647 All of this, it's bullshit. Huh! 418 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,191 They won't let us become Silvercops. 419 00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:49,693 No way, come on, it's right there! 420 00:17:50,277 --> 00:17:52,571 They lied to us, they're not gonna make you a Silvercop. 421 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,698 I see how it is. I thought we were friends, 422 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,950 but I guess you hate Holos just like everybody else. 423 00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,243 I swear, I'm trying to help you. 424 00:17:58,368 --> 00:17:59,578 Then you tap out! 425 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,705 I'm gonna fix the Silvercops from the inside, 426 00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:03,582 and nobody's gonna stop me! 427 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,959 Listen to me, do not cross that finish line, 428 00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:07,086 it's a death trap! 429 00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:08,462 Tomblr! 430 00:18:11,548 --> 00:18:12,925 Tomblr! 431 00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:14,510 I didn't get this far listening to people 432 00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:16,053 who told me not to try! 433 00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:23,811 Agh! Crappity, crap, crap, crap! 434 00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:28,899 Congratulations, recruits. 435 00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:30,526 You finished the Final Trial. 436 00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:33,862 - Your transport leaves now. - Get 'em, boys! 437 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:38,867 - You fucked up, son. - That you did. 438 00:18:41,662 --> 00:18:43,288 - Tomblr? - Don't talk to me! 439 00:18:43,413 --> 00:18:45,040 You were just trying to get my spot. 440 00:18:45,165 --> 00:18:47,251 I came here to protect you. We have to stick together. 441 00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:48,877 You can't stop lying, huh? 442 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:52,214 When we're Silvercops, do me a favor and forget you know me. 443 00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:53,966 - Attention! - Hell yes! 444 00:18:54,049 --> 00:18:55,884 Silvercops, here I come! 445 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,302 Your training is over. 446 00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:58,554 From here on out, 447 00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:00,848 your asses belong to the Silver Army, 448 00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,307 you Silver Grunts. 449 00:19:02,391 --> 00:19:03,892 What? 450 00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,812 Your first mission is clearing out the scourge on Zab 9. 451 00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:09,606 They're a terrifying force, but we will crush them! 452 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,484 {\an8} 453 00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:13,819 {\an8} 454 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:17,281 {\an8} 455 00:19:21,743 --> 00:19:24,246 {\an8}It was an honor being an edgy, offbeat, 456 00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,081 FX-adjacent family with you all. 457 00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,376 The Alexes. Schwing! 458 00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:44,183 Ha, ha, an eleventh-hour Lord of the Rings pirate ghost-style save! 459 00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,809 What the hell is going on here? 460 00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:47,895 We just came to get some batteries from the Giving Tree. 461 00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:50,772 Uh, too much to explain but if we activate this sci-fi school-maker, 462 00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,649 it'll undo everything we've done to these kids. 463 00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,526 Well, hold on a second. 464 00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,445 If we do that, they'll still get to keep their superintelligence, right? 465 00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:59,531 What? No, all the sci-fi schooling effects will go with the crazies. 466 00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:01,700 A small price to pay to keep them from taking over the planet. 467 00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:03,619 Yeah, I mean, I love this planet, 468 00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,120 I was born here, I get it, 469 00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,456 but their test scores are just so good. 470 00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:08,957 We need to keep the smarts. 471 00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:11,210 Our daughter's been pre-pre-accepted into Harvard. 472 00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:14,004 But they've been turned into soulless murder machines. 473 00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:16,798 Yes, but isn't that what it takes to get the best internships these days? 474 00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,384 - Yeah, it feels like a life skill to me. - Let's put it to a vote. 475 00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,762 All of those in favor of keeping the school, say aye. 476 00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:22,971 - Aye. - Aye. 477 00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,056 Aye. 478 00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:25,724 Ah, come on! 479 00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,434 You piss flaps are gonna destroy yourselves and the planets. 480 00:20:27,517 --> 00:20:29,102 We need to deprogram these kids. 481 00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,687 Yeah, we're gonna have to ask you to leave. 482 00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:33,482 You're no longer the right fit for our school. 483 00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,359 This is a Shlorpian training center! 484 00:20:35,442 --> 00:20:37,069 Thanks for your input, buh-bye. 485 00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:39,404 You smug assholes, you have no idea what you're doing. 486 00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:41,073 Without Korvo, you'll all be dead in a week. 487 00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,539 Huh, I was sure these kids would take over the world, 488 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:50,791 but they seem to be doing fine. 489 00:20:50,874 --> 00:20:52,417 What happened to all the child soldiers? 490 00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:54,920 We realized we could keep your Shlorpian education system 491 00:20:55,003 --> 00:20:56,922 if we balanced out the aggression with beta hobbies, 492 00:20:57,005 --> 00:20:58,966 like rollerblading and urban beekeeping. 493 00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,218 They're too lame to be Universal Soldiers, 494 00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:02,928 but the superintelligence stays. 495 00:21:03,011 --> 00:21:04,012 Noice. 496 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,514 Alright, fine. 497 00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,099 The Pupa can attend school here again. 498 00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:08,976 See, the thing is, we're at capacity, 499 00:21:09,059 --> 00:21:10,727 but we can put you on the interest list. 500 00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:13,105 Right, that's it, you yuppy piece of shit. I'm blasting you to ash. 501 00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:16,608 Excuse my husband. He gets heated about alien stuff. 502 00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,653 There has to be something that knocks those Alexes down a peg. 503 00:21:19,736 --> 00:21:21,363 Just forget it, you'd have to change 504 00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:23,573 the entire way education works on this planet. 505 00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:28,495 Let's just chug some hard seltzers and take the helicopter out for a spin. 506 00:21:28,578 --> 00:21:31,415 And this just in, thanks to a record-breaking donation 507 00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:33,458 of gold and diamonds from an alien, 508 00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:36,962 the entire planet now has free universal pre-K. 509 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:39,172 No school is exclusive anymore. 510 00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:40,549 {\an8}This is a disgrace! 511 00:21:40,632 --> 00:21:42,259 {\an8}We're good-looking rich people. 512 00:21:42,342 --> 00:21:43,593 {\an8}You can't do that to us! 513 00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:45,721 Korvo, holy shit, did you see the news about some alien 514 00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:47,931 creating free universal education for everyone? 515 00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:49,975 That wasn't you, was it? 516 00:21:50,517 --> 00:21:52,311 I'll never tell. 517 00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:54,062 The fuck, is that a camera?