1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,086
- [TV blaring]
- [Korvo] Pupa? Pupa!
2
00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:04,921
Where are you,
ya snuggly little shit sock?
3
00:00:05,046 --> 00:00:07,382
Knock it off, Korvo.
We're trying to watch Inlander.
4
00:00:07,465 --> 00:00:09,592
Yeah, it's the prequel
to Outlander,
5
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:12,595
and it's the only reason
I haven't filled my pockets with stones
6
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,055
and walked into a river.
7
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,765
We're just about to find out
the canonical explanation
8
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,434
for why they eat so much ass.
9
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:19,686
I bet it's 'cause
the Scottish countryside is freezing,
10
00:00:19,769 --> 00:00:21,271
so it keeps their noses toasty.
11
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:23,314
The Pupa keeps putting
bite marks in all my stuff.
12
00:00:23,732 --> 00:00:25,817
Look what he did to my serving spoon.
This shit is teak.
13
00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:29,112
Ah! Korvo, why don't you just use
the Find My Pupa app?
14
00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:31,948
I made it in my AP app class
specifically for this reason.
15
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,034
I hate that app. I refuse to pay
for the premium version,
16
00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:36,453
and the ads are all for antidepressants
you can only buy in Poland.
17
00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:37,996
The free version still works
18
00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:40,248
if the Pupa's within a block radius,
you friggin' dork.
19
00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:41,791
- Fine.
- [Pupa] Found me.
20
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,001
He's across the street?
21
00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:44,252
Company move!
22
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:46,254
[Pupa snarfing]
23
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,882
Aw, poor little guy
was probably teething.
24
00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,467
Look at him suck
on that muffler.
25
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,218
Does baby like to suck
on a muffler?
26
00:00:52,302 --> 00:00:54,012
Yes, he does. Ooh.
27
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:56,473
Why does he keep breaking into
this creepy abandoned house, anyway?
28
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:58,016
Guys, it's not abandoned.
29
00:00:58,099 --> 00:01:00,393
This is where Glen lived,
remember Glen?
30
00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:03,438
The guy you blasted into space
after you indirectly shot him
31
00:01:03,521 --> 00:01:05,065
in the foot with a collectible
bullet?
32
00:01:05,148 --> 00:01:07,067
Save these made-up stories
for your Substack.
33
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,736
We're standalone boys for life,
no consequences,
34
00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:11,488
and all the violence
is cartoonish.
35
00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:13,281
We might wanna remember Glen.
36
00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:15,617
He's probably plotting
a revenge on us.
37
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,202
Yeah, right, from space?
38
00:01:17,285 --> 00:01:18,828
He'll be lucky to
survive reentry.
39
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:20,288
Yeah, he's probably just
floating around
40
00:01:20,371 --> 00:01:22,123
because humans are
so obsessed with gravity.
41
00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,292
Once again,
your co-replicant has it right.
42
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:25,919
That Glen guy will
never do anything to us,
43
00:01:26,002 --> 00:01:27,420
least of all a revenge.
44
00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:30,673
We never, ever have
to think about him ever again!
45
00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:32,592
[♪ Silvercops theme playing]
46
00:01:32,675 --> 00:01:35,637
[planets whooshing]
47
00:01:37,388 --> 00:01:40,600
[planets whooshing]
48
00:01:43,561 --> 00:01:45,396
[jellyfish whooshing]
49
00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:47,065
♪
50
00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:55,198
[♪ guitar riff playing]
51
00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:59,661
♪ Previously on "Silvercops" ♪
52
00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:02,163
♪ Shot Glen to space, met cops ♪
53
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:04,666
♪ Had sex with cops ♪
54
00:02:04,749 --> 00:02:07,210
♪ Got betrayed by cops ♪
55
00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,254
♪ Met some friends, not cops ♪
56
00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:11,756
♪ Betrayed them
and joined the cops ♪
57
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,760
♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪
58
00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:17,846
♪
59
00:02:22,725 --> 00:02:23,852
I wanna see some hustle.
60
00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,478
If you wanna be Silvercops,
61
00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:27,814
you gotta know how to fuck,
buck, and work your vehicle.
62
00:02:27,897 --> 00:02:29,357
Shit, I meant truck.
63
00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,734
Y'all could stand to be
a little more like Dodge here.
64
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:33,653
This guy embodies fuckin'
and suckin'.
65
00:02:33,736 --> 00:02:35,029
Crushin' the game, Dodge.
66
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:37,282
Who? Oh, right,
that's my name now.
67
00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:38,950
Yes sir, Sergeant, sir.
68
00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:40,994
Yo, Charger, new recruit shuttle's
about to land.
69
00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:42,078
Remember when that was us?
70
00:02:42,203 --> 00:02:43,496
You mean, three days ago?
71
00:02:43,621 --> 00:02:45,874
For my species, that's
like 10 days.
72
00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,208
Let's go haze their asses.
73
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,252
Nah, I gotta buff
my hover muffler,
74
00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,713
or the hovering won't make
that woo-woo-woo noise
75
00:02:51,796 --> 00:02:53,423
that sounds so cool
when you drive it around.
76
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:55,675
Playing it cool,
I see how it is.
77
00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:59,304
That makes me wanna win
your favor, like, 3% more. Nice!
78
00:02:59,387 --> 00:03:01,639
[shuttle whirring]
79
00:03:01,764 --> 00:03:04,934
- Listen up, you silver scum.
- Let 'em know!
80
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,769
Today your real training begins,
81
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,189
but most of you slime ain't
gonna make it through boot camp.
82
00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,774
- Tell 'em!
- Because Silvercops have to be tough.
83
00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:13,526
Tough like my girlfriend's
titties.
84
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,320
And how do we measure toughness?
85
00:03:15,403 --> 00:03:16,988
I actually don't know.
86
00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:19,866
It all comes down to
the Final Trial,
87
00:03:19,949 --> 00:03:22,243
the most brutal competition
of your lives.
88
00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:25,914
Only the best and strongest
will move on to the next phase
89
00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:27,582
of becoming a Silvercop.
90
00:03:27,665 --> 00:03:29,375
That sounds final as hell.
91
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,377
The rest of you, you
get sent back
92
00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,129
to your shitty little lives
93
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:38,051
and your shitty little non-Silver families
in Silver shame.
94
00:03:38,134 --> 00:03:39,177
Kill yourselves.
95
00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:42,138
- Too far.
- Okay, little overboard.
96
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:44,057
Uh, hi. I'm Tomblr.
97
00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:46,768
Crundle Tomblr, but on Xorathios,
there's so many Crundles,
98
00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:48,353
I just go by my last name.
99
00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:51,105
I'm gonna shut up now.
What's your name?
100
00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:52,774
Dang, why can't I stop talkin'?
101
00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,817
What the hell you think
this is, recruit?
102
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,236
A frozen dairy social?
103
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:59,906
Oh, shit, he's cookin'
with lactose now!
104
00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:02,200
Uh, yes, sir. I mean no, sir?
105
00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:03,826
Drop and give me 20.
106
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:07,330
- I didn't bring my wallet.
- Push-ups, you piece of shit!
107
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,332
[recruits laughing]
108
00:04:10,541 --> 00:04:12,210
Hidey-hey-hey, Solars!
109
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:14,379
{\an8}What's the meaning of this
front yard gathering, neighbor Kevin?
110
00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,005
{\an8}Why do all these kids
look British?
111
00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:19,384
{\an8}They're rich! The wife and I got
our kids into Burberry Academy.
112
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,386
{\an8}Um, I think you mean Booberry.
113
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:24,180
{\an8}Burberry's the best preschool
in the tri-state area.
114
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,306
Let me rub it in a bit.
115
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:26,891
[Terry]
Whoa, look at those parents.
116
00:04:27,016 --> 00:04:29,519
Now these are a couple
of PILFs. Schwing!
117
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,271
Solars, meet Alex and Alex.
118
00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,730
Their kid's at Burberry, too.
119
00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:35,650
{\an8}Our little Alex has blossomed
since she got into the Burb.
120
00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:38,903
{\an8}She can bake a tarte tatin,
and she has a Letterbox account.
121
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:42,615
{\an8}Her review of Frances Ha
was nothing to laugh at.
122
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,158
{\an8}[all laughing]
123
00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,326
{\an8}That sounds stupid.
124
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,911
{\an8}Our Pupa doesn't need
any of that shit.
125
00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:49,038
{\an8}Last week, he brought
home a possum.
126
00:04:49,163 --> 00:04:52,166
{\an8}This Booberry Academy sounds awesome,
and the parents are so sexy.
127
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:53,501
{\an8}I can't stop schwinging.
128
00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:55,211
{\an8}Yes, your pelvic thrusts
are very noticeable,
129
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,130
{\an8}but does the Pupa really need
more education?
130
00:04:57,213 --> 00:04:58,423
{\an8}He's already a supercomputer.
131
00:04:58,506 --> 00:05:01,718
Oh, my God, is your ugly
son eating a car
132
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,803
instead of socializing
with the other children?
133
00:05:03,886 --> 00:05:07,307
{\an8}- Scandal!
- Wow, Pupa's got such a sense of humor.
134
00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:09,559
{\an8}That kid is a, well,
he's a regular Jay Leno
135
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:11,227
with the cars, isn't he?
[chuckles]
136
00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:12,854
Okay, it's official.
137
00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:15,315
The Solar Opposites are getting Pupa
into Burberry Academy.
138
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,650
Just 'cause you do a little aside
like that doesn't mean we can't hear you.
139
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,027
[Korvo and Terry]
What?
140
00:05:20,361 --> 00:05:22,530
{\an8}Our campus is state-of-the-art,
141
00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:26,159
with amenities both modern
and inspired by nature,
142
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,702
like our freshwater stream.
143
00:05:27,785 --> 00:05:29,078
[Solars oohing]
144
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,040
Our 250-year-old Wisdom Tree.
145
00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:33,750
[Solars ahhing]
146
00:05:33,833 --> 00:05:36,210
Oh, my God, these book nooks
are so adorable,
147
00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:38,004
my zovaries are bursting!
148
00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:39,464
Do you see this?
All the kids in a line,
149
00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,174
doing the same thing,
none of them acting weird.
150
00:05:41,257 --> 00:05:42,258
Pupa needs this.
151
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,302
Our Pupa will attend
this school.
152
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,095
{\an8}I'm afraid it's a
rigorous process
153
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,765
{\an8}to get one's child admitted,
and unfortunately,
154
00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:50,808
{\an8}the deadline was yesterday.
155
00:05:50,933 --> 00:05:53,644
{\an8}I feel like you could have told us that
before you took us on this tour
156
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,813
{\an8}and got our mounds
all juiced up, you know?
157
00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:59,567
{\an8}We could always put your child
on our "interest list."
158
00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:01,944
- Oh, we are interested.
- Put us on the bloody list!
159
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:06,282
Yeah, that's a W
for La Familia Solaropposita!
160
00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:09,744
{\an8}Hey, uh, guess what, hot Alexes?
161
00:06:09,827 --> 00:06:11,871
{\an8}We're gonna be hanging
out a lot more.
162
00:06:11,954 --> 00:06:14,290
{\an8}Our Pupa just got on
the interest list.
163
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,375
{\an8}[both laughing]
164
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,168
{\an8}Oh, bless your little hearts.
165
00:06:17,251 --> 00:06:18,836
{\an8}The interest list is a lie.
166
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,963
{\an8}It's what they put people on
when they're never getting in.
167
00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,673
Well, that can't be
right. It's a list!
168
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:25,551
We already declared this a W.
We can't undeclare a W.
169
00:06:25,676 --> 00:06:28,471
You can't just waltz in
and get admitted to Burberry.
170
00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:30,473
I mean, are you the
son of anyone?
171
00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:31,974
Not technically, but
I was replicated
172
00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,435
off a much larger Shlorpian
named Rin Tin Torvo.
173
00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,562
Well, if your last name
isn't Jolie-Pitt
174
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:38,022
or Knowles-Carter-Beckham,
175
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:40,400
you're gonna be
on that interest list indefinitely.
176
00:06:40,483 --> 00:06:43,903
And if your kid doesn't go to Burberry,
what's the point of even living?
177
00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:46,572
- Ah, she's right.
- Stop it, Terry.
178
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:48,366
We can solve this with sci-fi.
179
00:06:48,449 --> 00:06:49,867
Burberry doesn't want us, fine.
180
00:06:49,992 --> 00:06:52,328
We'll start our own
crazy alien school.
181
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,247
We'll make it better
and fancier than Burberry,
182
00:06:54,330 --> 00:06:56,791
and all these snooty fucks
will want to get their kids in.
183
00:06:56,874 --> 00:06:58,042
They'll be so jealous.
184
00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:00,211
Oh, yas, yas, yas!
Get out of my head!
185
00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:02,088
And Yum and I can
be the teachers!
186
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,756
I was kinda hoping
I could just sit this one out
187
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,633
and watch ramen-slurping
ASMR videos?
188
00:07:05,716 --> 00:07:07,510
No, we're doing this together
so we don't get a note
189
00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:08,719
that we split up too much.
190
00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:10,680
{\an8}Ugh, fine, you're such a Karen!
191
00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:12,348
{\an8}Shut up, I am not.
192
00:07:13,349 --> 00:07:16,561
AISHA, do we have any sci-fi way
to make an elitist school?
193
00:07:16,644 --> 00:07:18,312
[AISHA]
Uh, yeah, I guess you could use
194
00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:20,857
the emergency Shlorpian
training protocols for that,
195
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,316
but they're kinda intense.
196
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,901
Alright, I didn't ask
for your Yelp review.
197
00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:25,403
Oh, gimme, gimme, gimme.
198
00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:27,488
Here we go, let me just grab
the sci-fi school maker,
199
00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:28,948
change some of this
baseline code,
200
00:07:29,031 --> 00:07:30,491
add some cool shit from
that other school,
201
00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,452
and dah-dah-dah-dah-doo,
we are done.
202
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,537
[door whirs]
203
00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,456
♪
204
00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:39,542
Are you sure Glen will be okay
with us building a school in his house?
205
00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,461
Like I care. Run!
206
00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:44,672
[energy whirring]
207
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:46,007
[lasers pulsing]
208
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,258
[Solars oohing]
209
00:07:47,341 --> 00:07:48,676
Schwing!
210
00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:54,557
[recruits grunting]
211
00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:55,808
[mud splatters]
212
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,768
Good work, Charger,
you're crushin' it.
213
00:07:57,852 --> 00:07:59,353
I'm sorta hyped out.
214
00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,730
Do you wanna grab lunch?
215
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,148
[bullies laughing]
216
00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:03,983
Yo, Dodge, you gotta get in
on this bullying.
217
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:06,360
This turd's gonna have to spend
a fortune on therapy.
218
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,030
- [bullies grunting]
- [recruit whimpering]
219
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:12,533
Can you believe they let a filthy Holo
sign up for Silver training?
220
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:14,243
[bullies laughing]
221
00:08:14,368 --> 00:08:17,163
[♪ tender music playing]
222
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,584
What's your damage, Charger?
You suck Holo butt?
223
00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:24,212
Shut the fuck up, Zobert.
Don't make me kick your ass.
224
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,255
[Zobert groaning]
225
00:08:26,714 --> 00:08:29,008
Dirty trick, I should
kill you right now!
226
00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:30,968
But I have to take a shit,
and you know I need company
227
00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:32,762
so we can gossip while
I dump one out.
228
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:35,056
That's why I'm leaving.
And not because I'm scared.
229
00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,432
Come on, boys.
230
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,684
- Oh, thank you.
- Those guys are assholes.
231
00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:40,561
- Name's Dodge.
- Wow, what a cool name.
232
00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,979
It doesn't sound made up at all.
233
00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:44,398
- I'm Tomblr.
- Also a cool real name.
234
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,984
Hey, just stay away from those dudes
and keep your head down.
235
00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:48,861
- You'll be fine.
- I'm just so nervous.
236
00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:51,948
It gets easier, just focus on training.
Final Trial's coming up.
237
00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:54,033
[♪ ominous music playing]
238
00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:57,203
Check out Silver Mountain,
where Final Trial happens.
239
00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:59,288
It's also got some berry bushes
that grow on the south face.
240
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,957
They're delicious on pancakes.
241
00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,543
But mostly it's for the trial.
242
00:09:04,585 --> 00:09:07,713
{\an8}Mr. Korvo's Academy is
the best preschool
243
00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:10,299
in all four corners
of David Attenborough's planet Earth.
244
00:09:10,424 --> 00:09:12,093
We have cutting-edge
equine classes.
245
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,971
...Seabiscuit was sired
by Man of War and Jizz Nugget.
246
00:09:15,096 --> 00:09:16,764
- STEM classes.
- [portal whirring]
247
00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:19,225
Watch out for those black holes,
you little idiots.
248
00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,852
Our book nooks really make
storytelling come to life.
249
00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:24,188
Come on, Jesus,
I have to get you to the Pentagon.
250
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,148
I don't think we have time,
Dr. Robert Langdon.
251
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:27,650
I'm losing a lot of blood.
252
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,820
No, you're not dying for a third time,
not on my watch.
253
00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:32,488
And this is our Giving Tree.
254
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,365
May I have an apple, please?
255
00:09:34,991 --> 00:09:36,826
Goddammit, I said an apple!
Give me an apple,
256
00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:38,786
or I'll cut your ass down
and then take them myself.
257
00:09:38,869 --> 00:09:40,413
- [apple thuds]
- [Korvo groans]
258
00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:44,083
And the last stop on our tour,
the Office of Admissions.
259
00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:46,460
Okay, get your applications here.
260
00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:49,630
One per student, please,
and grammar only counts if it's Kelsey.
261
00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:51,090
Hello, Terry, Korvo.
262
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:55,219
We're so, so thankful that
you're considering little Alex.
263
00:09:55,344 --> 00:09:58,180
As trap king of admissions,
you don't have to worry.
264
00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,807
There's no interest list here.
265
00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:03,853
KorKor, all these sexy parents
are drooling over us
266
00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:04,979
like we're 3D-printed meat.
267
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:06,564
Is this the best idea
we've ever had?
268
00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,190
There was that one time
we did needle drugs
269
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,318
with the Charmin Bears,
but otherwise, yes!
270
00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:13,237
And for the first time ever,
no weird sci-fi side effects.
271
00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:14,614
Suck it, consequences!
272
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,866
[both laughing]
273
00:10:16,991 --> 00:10:19,910
[bullies laughing]
274
00:10:19,994 --> 00:10:21,245
[whistle trilling]
275
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:24,081
This obstacle course
will test your skill,
276
00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:25,833
your strength, and your grit.
277
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:27,376
Hit 'em with the headlines!
278
00:10:27,501 --> 00:10:30,421
If you don't finish in five minutes,
you wash out
279
00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:32,923
and are disqualified
from the Final Trial.
280
00:10:33,007 --> 00:10:34,342
That's stakes, baby.
281
00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:37,345
And your time... starts now!
282
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:40,264
[Dodge grunting]
283
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:42,224
[♪ action music playing]
284
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,268
[Tomblr panting]
285
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:47,355
You got this, Tomblr, move it!
286
00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,899
What are you, fucking climbing experts?
Come on!
287
00:10:51,025 --> 00:10:52,943
[Tomblr grunting]
288
00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:55,529
Oh, no, a little beam,
it's so narrow!
289
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:56,697
[whimpering]
290
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:57,823
- [flames whooshing]
- [Tomblr yelps]
291
00:10:57,907 --> 00:10:59,450
Steady. Steady!
292
00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:02,078
I know you said I got this,
but I don't think I do.
293
00:11:02,161 --> 00:11:03,245
Just one round to go.
294
00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:04,914
[flames whooshing]
295
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:06,874
♪
296
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,584
[Dodge grunting]
297
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,420
- This is where we catch up.
- I can't. I can't.
298
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,547
[Dodge]
Hurry, man, you can do this!
299
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:15,007
[water rushing]
300
00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,259
- Do you trust me?
- I think so?
301
00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:19,178
- Then drop down!
- But we'll wash out.
302
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:20,388
- Trust me!
- No!
303
00:11:20,471 --> 00:11:23,099
[water splashing]
304
00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,104
It worked!
305
00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:29,980
First, but how?
306
00:11:30,064 --> 00:11:32,233
I realized the current was the quickest
way to get to the finish line.
307
00:11:32,316 --> 00:11:33,859
There tweren't any
rules against it.
308
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,403
[Zobert grunting]
309
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:38,072
That's zarg shit! They cheated!
310
00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:40,700
They used their heads.
You might wanna try it sometime.
311
00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:41,826
Go off, pimp!
312
00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:43,285
- Woo-hoo-hoo!
- We did it!
313
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,246
We bent the rules
to our advantage!
314
00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:46,789
- We did it, bro, yeah!
- Woo-hoo-hoo!
315
00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:48,040
[both cheering]
316
00:11:48,499 --> 00:11:50,376
[♪ gentle music playing]
317
00:11:50,459 --> 00:11:53,254
You know, I didn't think I'd bond
with anyone out here,
318
00:11:53,337 --> 00:11:54,672
since I'm a Holo.
319
00:11:54,755 --> 00:11:56,382
Had some friends who were Holos,
320
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:57,925
and the way the Silvercops
treated 'em?
321
00:11:58,008 --> 00:11:59,051
Not cool.
322
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,261
Well, growing up Holo,
323
00:12:00,344 --> 00:12:02,263
Silvercops always treated
me like shit.
324
00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:05,391
Saw my dad get beat up
for no reason so many times.
325
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,435
One time, I saw him cry
because they made him eat
326
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,812
so many seeds that
he shit his pants.
327
00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,188
I hate 'em.
328
00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,691
So why enlist?
You trying to get back at them?
329
00:12:13,774 --> 00:12:16,110
I want to change the force
from the inside.
330
00:12:16,193 --> 00:12:18,779
Revenge is worthless
when you can effect real change.
331
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:22,283
Change over revenge, totally.
332
00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:29,498
{\an8}And you can always tell a star
coming from the Milky Bone Galaxy
333
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:32,877
because it smells like crickets
and Aubrey Plaza's dry shampoo.
334
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:35,629
[kids moaning]
335
00:12:36,338 --> 00:12:39,425
Um, Jesse, are human eyes supposed
to glow with milky power?
336
00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:43,137
Eh, it's probably from watching
too many boat show fistfight videos
337
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:45,181
on the Public Freakout subreddit.
338
00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,016
Okay, class,
which constellation smells
339
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,185
like Jessica Simpson's
edible body wash?
340
00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:51,771
[class in unison]
Trycloponz.
341
00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,397
Correct. See, they're fine.
342
00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:56,233
[class in unison] We pledge allegiance
to Shlorp's grey god
343
00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:58,402
and humbly protect our station.
344
00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:01,238
We protect the Pupa, terraform,
345
00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:03,991
and annihilate the population.
346
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:05,367
- [Yumyulack gasps]
- No!
347
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:06,869
- Stop it! Shut up, shut up, kids!
- No! No, no.
348
00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:08,287
- Did you teach them that?
- No,
349
00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:09,872
I've never heard that pledge
in my whole life!
350
00:13:09,955 --> 00:13:11,332
[bell chimes]
351
00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:13,876
Everybody sit down now,
class is still in session.
352
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:17,087
[class in unison]
Kill the threats, take over now.
353
00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:19,840
This is no bueno.
We gotta tell Terry and Korvo.
354
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,342
Yeah, right after
my smoke break.
355
00:13:21,425 --> 00:13:24,887
[class in unison]
Kill the threats, take over now.
356
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,430
Okay, let's go!
357
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:32,645
- [Sgt. Argent] Recruits, hut!
- [Hype Man] I don't see y'all huttin'!
358
00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,688
This is it, the Final Trial.
359
00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:36,857
Only the fastest,
toughest, smartest recruits
360
00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:40,194
will be victorious and move on
to becoming Silvercops.
361
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,321
Losers go home to their mamas.
362
00:13:42,404 --> 00:13:43,614
I love my mama!
363
00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:45,324
If you can't handle the heat,
364
00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,618
your armor has a tap-out button.
365
00:13:47,743 --> 00:13:51,497
But be warned, once you tap it,
you're washed out.
366
00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,749
Good luck, future
sons of silver.
367
00:13:53,874 --> 00:13:54,959
[buzzer]
368
00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:56,752
- [recruits panting]
- Hold on there, son.
369
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,629
- But the trial!
- Listen to the man.
370
00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:00,172
We've been watchin' you, kid.
371
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:03,676
Dominatin' practices,
crushin' the competition.
372
00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:06,136
You got what it takes
to be a Silvercop.
373
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:08,389
You don't have to do
the Final Trial.
374
00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:09,890
Trial's bullshit, anyway.
375
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,058
Bullshit, what do you mean?
376
00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:13,561
Nobody here ends up a Silvercop.
377
00:14:13,644 --> 00:14:15,104
They're too lowborn.
378
00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:18,399
Nah, we get our real recruits
from the Silver Academy.
379
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:19,483
That's the truth!
380
00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:21,026
But why all this, then?
381
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:23,904
- We gotta get our Silver Grunts somewhere.
- Grunt life!
382
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,239
What's a Silver Grunt?
383
00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:26,907
Food for powder, son.
384
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:28,367
That means cannon fodder.
385
00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:30,911
The Silvercops keep
the galaxy safe,
386
00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:33,455
but some planets
just don't see it like that,
387
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:36,667
so their population's
got to be pacified.
388
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:40,421
Bloody, gruesome fights
with a huge death toll.
389
00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:43,340
Well, we aren't gonna
waste Silvercops on that.
390
00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:47,136
- So, we throw in the Grunts.
- They gonna die.
391
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,722
Jesus, okay, my friend's
in the Final Trials right now.
392
00:14:49,805 --> 00:14:51,849
He can't be a Grunt.
I have to bring him with me.
393
00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:53,392
[both laugh]
394
00:14:53,475 --> 00:14:55,519
- There's nothin' you can do.
- Facts!
395
00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:56,979
Yes, there is.
396
00:14:57,229 --> 00:14:59,607
Whoa, kid, get back here!
397
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,150
Don't throw your life away!
398
00:15:01,233 --> 00:15:03,319
No one turns their backs on us!
399
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:05,362
[machinery rumbling]
400
00:15:05,446 --> 00:15:08,032
- [recruits screaming]
- [lasers whirring]
401
00:15:09,783 --> 00:15:12,745
- [♪ tense music playing]
- [Dodge panting]
402
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:14,997
[blades whooshing]
403
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,332
Get me outta here!
404
00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:19,585
[recruit yelling]
405
00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:20,920
Tomblr?
406
00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:22,296
Tomblr, where are you?
407
00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:25,841
{\an8}God, I love being
a smug academic.
408
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,801
Ooh, I think I'm gonna
give myself tenure.
409
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:31,180
Yeah, I was built for more of a widow
of a disgraced FIFA executive,
410
00:15:31,263 --> 00:15:33,307
- but this is pretty cool too.
- [glasses clink]
411
00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:34,892
- [kids snarl]
- [both yelp]
412
00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:37,269
What the hell are you teaching
these kids?
413
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,646
Just the normal stuff,
414
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,481
and then they started
attacking the parents.
415
00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:42,358
Do we know what
the cafeteria is serving today?
416
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:43,859
- Is it nuggets?
- Terry, focus.
417
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,903
These kids can't be dragging
away parents on campus.
418
00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:47,237
People will stop respecting us.
419
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:48,822
[♪ dramatic music playing]
420
00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:50,574
[gasps] Mother of Moby!
421
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,368
Those are Shlorpian
soul harvesters.
422
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,078
Wait, souls exist?
423
00:15:54,161 --> 00:15:56,080
What about God
and the devil and all that?
424
00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:57,957
They exist too, but
they're all aliens,
425
00:15:58,082 --> 00:16:00,292
and I don't have time to explain
how they mind-controlled ancient humans
426
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,710
into being their fuck buddies.
427
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,379
Point is, those harvesters
suck out life energy
428
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:04,797
and convert them into
Shlorpian energy,
429
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,090
which is really just
a different color energy.
430
00:16:06,173 --> 00:16:08,425
[parents wailing]
431
00:16:08,509 --> 00:16:11,261
[all gasping]
432
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:13,180
AISHA, we fucked up!
433
00:16:13,263 --> 00:16:14,848
All the kids are turning their parents
into puddles of ooze!
434
00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,600
[AISHA]
I tried to tell you dummies.
435
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:19,603
Those protocols are supposed
to be for emergency use only!
436
00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:21,689
But all those hot parents
were an emergency.
437
00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:23,816
I couldn't stop schwinging,
Terry gotta schwing!
438
00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:26,026
[AISHA] It's not for
that kind of emergency.
439
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:29,822
It's more like if you're being attacked
and you need an army to protect the Pupa.
440
00:16:29,905 --> 00:16:33,033
Ah, shit, we turned all those kids
into Universal Soldiers?
441
00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:35,703
[AISHA] If y'all don't stop this now,
those entitled-ass children
442
00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:37,413
are gonna take over
the whole world.
443
00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:39,748
Ah, why did we have to care so much
about those sexy parents?
444
00:16:39,873 --> 00:16:42,334
Terry, replicants one and three,
I have to come clean.
445
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,919
I know I said I founded
this school
446
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,213
because I wanted to be cool
and hang with hot parents,
447
00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:47,881
- but that was a lie.
- [all gasp]
448
00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:49,425
I don't care about the parents.
449
00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:51,552
{\an8}I actually wanted the Pupa
to have a good education.
450
00:16:51,635 --> 00:16:54,304
{\an8}But usually you're just as shallow as me.
What happened, babe?
451
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,640
When I was a young replicant,
I was a narc-y little bitch
452
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,934
who everyone hated,
because I was stupid and lame.
453
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:01,603
It took me years of reading
and educating myself to realize
454
00:17:01,687 --> 00:17:03,814
what a loser, asshole,
shitbag I was.
455
00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:05,190
I wanted better for the Pupa.
456
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:07,151
Oh, Korvo, it wasn't school.
457
00:17:07,234 --> 00:17:09,153
Everyone's a stupid little shitbag
when they're kids.
458
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:10,821
- Really?
- Uh-huh,
459
00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,865
and if you're not a shitbag,
well, then you're a cumstain.
460
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,825
- Or an asswad.
- That's right.
461
00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:16,577
Fuck that school.
Pupa doesn't need it.
462
00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:18,746
He'll grow out of being a piss-bubble
when he's good and ready.
463
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,581
That does make me feel better.
464
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:22,458
Even so, I still think
we should stop those kids,
465
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,126
or we'll have to go to
so many funerals.
466
00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:26,962
I cannot put on more
Shiva weight, let's go.
467
00:17:27,087 --> 00:17:28,714
Look out for those kids!
468
00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:30,799
- [kids snarling]
- [Solars shouting]
469
00:17:31,091 --> 00:17:32,301
We have to reset the school!
470
00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:34,595
Blegh, their little hands
are so sticky!
471
00:17:35,179 --> 00:17:36,889
[kids hissing]
472
00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,224
- [Tomblr grunting]
- Tomblr!
473
00:17:39,349 --> 00:17:41,393
We're doing good, Dodge,
just a little further.
474
00:17:41,518 --> 00:17:43,604
- We gotta tap out.
- What are you talkin' about?
475
00:17:43,687 --> 00:17:45,647
All of this, it's bullshit. Huh!
476
00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,191
They won't let us become Silvercops.
477
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:49,693
No way, come on, it's
right there!
478
00:17:50,277 --> 00:17:52,571
They lied to us, they're not
gonna make you a Silvercop.
479
00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,698
I see how it is.
I thought we were friends,
480
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,950
but I guess you hate Holos
just like everybody else.
481
00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,243
I swear, I'm trying to help you.
482
00:17:58,368 --> 00:17:59,578
Then you tap out!
483
00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,705
I'm gonna fix the Silvercops
from the inside,
484
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:03,582
and nobody's gonna stop me!
485
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,959
Listen to me, do not cross
that finish line,
486
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:07,086
it's a death trap!
487
00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:08,462
Tomblr!
488
00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:11,131
[♪ dramatic music playing]
489
00:18:11,548 --> 00:18:12,925
Tomblr!
490
00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:14,510
I didn't get this far
listening to people
491
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:16,053
who told me not to try!
492
00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:17,888
[Tomblr yelps]
493
00:18:18,013 --> 00:18:20,641
[♪ dramatic music continues]
494
00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:23,811
Agh! Crappity, crap, crap, crap!
495
00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:25,395
[buzzer]
496
00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:28,899
Congratulations, recruits.
497
00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:30,526
You finished the Final Trial.
498
00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:33,862
- Your transport leaves now.
- Get 'em, boys!
499
00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:38,867
- You fucked up, son.
- That you did.
500
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:41,578
[♪ somber music playing]
501
00:18:41,662 --> 00:18:43,288
- Tomblr?
- Don't talk to me!
502
00:18:43,413 --> 00:18:45,040
You were just trying
to get my spot.
503
00:18:45,165 --> 00:18:47,251
I came here to protect you.
We have to stick together.
504
00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:48,877
You can't stop lying, huh?
505
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:52,214
When we're Silvercops, do me a favor
and forget you know me.
506
00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:53,966
- Attention!
- Hell yes!
507
00:18:54,049 --> 00:18:55,884
Silvercops, here I come!
508
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,302
[Commander]
Your training is over.
509
00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:58,554
From here on out,
510
00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:00,848
your asses belong
to the Silver Army,
511
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,307
- you Silver Grunts.
- [door slams]
512
00:19:02,391 --> 00:19:03,892
- [recruits gasping]
- What?
513
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,812
Your first mission is clearing out
the scourge on Zab 9.
514
00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:09,606
They're a terrifying force,
but we will crush them!
515
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,484
{\an8}[computer beeping]
516
00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:13,819
{\an8}[spaceship whooshes]
517
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:17,281
{\an8}[♪ ominous music playing]
518
00:19:21,743 --> 00:19:24,246
{\an8}It was an honor being
an edgy, offbeat,
519
00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,081
FX-adjacent family with you all.
520
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,166
- [door slams]
- [Jesse gasps]
521
00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,376
[Terry]
The Alexes. Schwing!
522
00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:33,213
[♪ intense music playing]
523
00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:36,300
- [kids snarling]
- [Kicks thudding]
524
00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:44,183
Ha, ha, an eleventh-hour Lord of the Rings
pirate ghost-style save!
525
00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,809
What the hell is going on here?
526
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:47,895
We just came to get some batteries
from the Giving Tree.
527
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:50,772
Uh, too much to explain but
if we activate this sci-fi school-maker,
528
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,649
it'll undo everything
we've done to these kids.
529
00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,526
Well, hold on a second.
530
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,445
If we do that, they'll still get to keep
their superintelligence, right?
531
00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:59,531
What? No, all the sci-fi schooling effects
will go with the crazies.
532
00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:01,700
A small price to pay to keep them
from taking over the planet.
533
00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:03,619
Yeah, I mean, I love
this planet,
534
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,120
I was born here, I get it,
535
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,456
but their test scores
are just so good.
536
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:08,957
We need to keep the smarts.
537
00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:11,210
Our daughter's been pre-pre-accepted
into Harvard.
538
00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:14,004
But they've been turned into
soulless murder machines.
539
00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:16,798
Yes, but isn't that what it takes
to get the best internships these days?
540
00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,384
- Yeah, it feels like a life skill to me.
- Let's put it to a vote.
541
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,762
All of those in favor of keeping
the school, say aye.
542
00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:22,971
- Aye.
- Aye.
543
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,056
[parent]
Aye.
544
00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:25,724
Ah, come on!
545
00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,434
You piss flaps are gonna destroy
yourselves and the planets.
546
00:20:27,517 --> 00:20:29,102
We need to deprogram these kids.
547
00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,687
Yeah, we're gonna have
to ask you to leave.
548
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:33,482
You're no longer
the right fit for our school.
549
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,359
This is a Shlorpian
training center!
550
00:20:35,442 --> 00:20:37,069
Thanks for your input, buh-bye.
551
00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:39,404
You smug assholes,
you have no idea what you're doing.
552
00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:41,073
Without Korvo,
you'll all be dead in a week.
553
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:42,199
[door slams]
554
00:20:42,616 --> 00:20:45,035
[♪ horror music sting]
555
00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,539
Huh, I was sure these kids
would take over the world,
556
00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:50,791
but they seem to be doing fine.
557
00:20:50,874 --> 00:20:52,417
What happened to all
the child soldiers?
558
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:54,920
We realized we could keep
your Shlorpian education system
559
00:20:55,003 --> 00:20:56,922
if we balanced out the aggression
with beta hobbies,
560
00:20:57,005 --> 00:20:58,966
like rollerblading and
urban beekeeping.
561
00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,218
They're too lame
to be Universal Soldiers,
562
00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:02,928
but the superintelligence stays.
563
00:21:03,011 --> 00:21:04,012
Noice.
564
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,514
Alright, fine.
565
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,099
The Pupa can attend
school here again.
566
00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:08,976
See, the thing is,
we're at capacity,
567
00:21:09,059 --> 00:21:10,727
but we can put you on
the interest list.
568
00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:13,105
Right, that's it, you yuppy piece of shit.
I'm blasting you to ash.
569
00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:16,608
Excuse my husband.
He gets heated about alien stuff.
570
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,653
There has to be something
that knocks those Alexes down a peg.
571
00:21:19,736 --> 00:21:21,363
Just forget it,
you'd have to change
572
00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:23,573
the entire way education works
on this planet.
573
00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:28,495
Let's just chug some hard seltzers
and take the helicopter out for a spin.
574
00:21:28,578 --> 00:21:31,415
[reporter on TV] And this just in,
thanks to a record-breaking donation
575
00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:33,458
of gold and diamonds
from an alien,
576
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:36,962
the entire planet now has
free universal pre-K.
577
00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:39,172
No school is exclusive anymore.
578
00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:40,549
{\an8}This is a disgrace!
579
00:21:40,632 --> 00:21:42,259
{\an8}We're good-looking rich people.
580
00:21:42,342 --> 00:21:43,593
{\an8}You can't do that to us!
581
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:45,721
Korvo, holy shit, did you see
the news about some alien
582
00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:47,931
creating free universal education
for everyone?
583
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:49,975
That wasn't you, was it?
584
00:21:50,517 --> 00:21:52,311
I'll never tell.
585
00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:54,062
The fuck, is that a camera?
586
00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:57,190
[♪ dramatic theme playing]
587
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:28,221
♪
588
00:22:38,482 --> 00:22:39,983
[mimicking laser fire]