1
00:00:01,022 --> 00:00:03,107
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

2
00:00:03,107 --> 00:00:06,027
♪

3
00:00:07,111 --> 00:00:09,322
[laser crackling]

4
00:00:09,322 --> 00:00:11,491
‐ Damn it.
Stupid thing, come on.

5
00:00:11,491 --> 00:00:15,828
‐ Ooh, build that Earth drill, Korvo.
Work those blue arms.

6
00:00:15,828 --> 00:00:17,580
‐ Stop undressing me
with your eyes, Debbie.

7
00:00:17,580 --> 00:00:19,082
I just want to work out here in peace.

8
00:00:19,082 --> 00:00:20,833
I'm not out here
for your sexual titillation.

9
00:00:20,833 --> 00:00:23,545
‐ Hey, the replicants missed the bus.
Can you take them to school?

10
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:24,796
I got stuff to do.
‐ We didn't miss it.

11
00:00:24,796 --> 00:00:27,173
They purposely skipped our house.
‐ I'm sure it was an accident.

12
00:00:27,173 --> 00:00:29,217
‐ The bus driver hates us
because I tried to harvest

13
00:00:29,217 --> 00:00:31,594
one small tiny sample of her eye.

14
00:00:31,594 --> 00:00:33,555
‐ Can we please go?
Homeroom is where I decide

15
00:00:33,555 --> 00:00:35,390
who I'm going to crush on for the day.

16
00:00:35,390 --> 00:00:37,809
‐ No, I'm busy.
‐ Oh, come on, Korvo. Don't be like that.

17
00:00:37,809 --> 00:00:39,477
‐ You should be helping me
construct the Earth drill.

18
00:00:39,477 --> 00:00:41,896
‐ I have to take the Pupa to the dog park.
We don't wanna miss the labradoodles.

19
00:00:41,896 --> 00:00:45,275
‐ Oh, oh, is the dog park more important
than mining nickel alloys

20
00:00:45,275 --> 00:00:46,484
so we can repair our spaceship?

21
00:00:46,484 --> 00:00:48,111
‐ Uh, I don't know, Korvo.

22
00:00:48,111 --> 00:00:50,530
Can nickel alloy
catch a Frisbee in the air?

23
00:00:50,530 --> 00:00:52,031
‐ We won't know until we get some.

24
00:00:52,031 --> 00:00:54,158
You know, sometimes it feels like
I'm the only Shlorpion

25
00:00:54,158 --> 00:00:55,952
who wants to escape this garbage planet.

26
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‐ Hey, hey, you're the one
who chose to land here.

27
00:00:57,704 --> 00:00:59,956
‐ My scans didn't indicate it was
a human‐infested crap hole

28
00:00:59,956 --> 00:01:01,958
without a single redeeming value, Terry.

29
00:01:01,958 --> 00:01:05,003
We have been stranded here for a year.
How is that not a problem for you?

30
00:01:08,131 --> 00:01:10,341
[rumbling]

31
00:01:10,341 --> 00:01:12,343
[screaming]

32
00:01:12,343 --> 00:01:14,053
[people screaming]

33
00:01:16,306 --> 00:01:17,682
[alarm blaring]

34
00:01:20,476 --> 00:01:25,398
♪ ominous music playing ♪

35
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Come on, all right.
Come to papo.

36
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No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

37
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[yells]

38
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[yells]

39
00:01:35,658 --> 00:01:37,285
[barking]

40
00:01:37,285 --> 00:01:39,704
‐ Oh, you guys, there was a shooting
at the dog park,

41
00:01:39,704 --> 00:01:42,498
but you would never know 'cause
these dogs are just so happy, aren't they?

42
00:01:42,498 --> 00:01:45,251
Yeah, you like those little stumps?
You gonna lick 'em?

43
00:01:46,294 --> 00:01:48,421
KORVO:
Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia.

44
00:01:48,421 --> 00:01:50,298
Until the asteroid hit.

45
00:01:51,466 --> 00:01:53,843
One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a Pupa

46
00:01:53,843 --> 00:01:55,678
and escaped into, uh, the space,

47
00:01:55,678 --> 00:01:58,223
searching for new homes
on uninhabited worlds.

48
00:01:58,932 --> 00:02:02,060
We crashed on Earth, stranding us
on an already overpopulated planet.

49
00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:03,770
That's right,
I've been talking this whole time.

50
00:02:03,770 --> 00:02:05,688
I'm the one holding the Pupa.
My name's Korvo.

51
00:02:05,688 --> 00:02:07,982
This is‐‐ this is my show.
I just dropped the Pupa. Do you see me?

52
00:02:07,982 --> 00:02:09,400
[stammers]
This is ridiculous.

53
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,277
I hate Earth.
It's a horrible home.

54
00:02:11,277 --> 00:02:12,737
And one of these days,
I'm gonna blow it up

55
00:02:12,737 --> 00:02:15,073
and just be done with the whole
stupid thing, I swear to God.

56
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♪ dramatic music playing ♪

57
00:02:17,242 --> 00:02:19,369
♪

58
00:02:23,915 --> 00:02:25,917
[Pupa coos]
‐ Oh, look at those cute little feet.

59
00:02:25,917 --> 00:02:27,460
They're really growing in.
Look at 'em go!

60
00:02:27,460 --> 00:02:29,003
‐ Don't look at them.
‐ I have the whole day planned out.

61
00:02:29,003 --> 00:02:31,548
We're gonna go buy lottery tickets,
we're gonna win a million dollars,

62
00:02:31,548 --> 00:02:33,675
but then, we give it all
as a tip to a waitress

63
00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:35,260
and totally change her life.

64
00:02:35,260 --> 00:02:37,554
You go, girlfriend.
Buy yourself a new pair of shoes.

65
00:02:37,554 --> 00:02:40,848
‐ My plan is to sit in dim light,
spray nutrients on my stumps,

66
00:02:40,848 --> 00:02:43,935
so‐‐ until they grow out,
and I'll study repair manuals.

67
00:02:43,935 --> 00:02:46,771
‐ Korvotron, come on.
I know Earth is a little more

68
00:02:46,771 --> 00:02:48,898
inhabited with sentient life
than you expected,

69
00:02:48,898 --> 00:02:50,066
but it can still be fun.

70
00:02:50,066 --> 00:02:51,943
You just got to roll,
roll with the homies.

71
00:02:51,943 --> 00:02:54,320
‐ I'm not gonna ever like it here.
Stop trying to cheer me up.

72
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I just‐‐ let me grow my feet in peace.
‐ Whatever, Korvo.

73
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♪ upbeat music playing ♪

74
00:02:59,742 --> 00:03:02,161
♪

75
00:03:05,582 --> 00:03:06,708
[grunts]

76
00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:08,167
‐ Huh.

77
00:03:08,167 --> 00:03:09,419
[bell rings]

78
00:03:09,419 --> 00:03:11,504
‐ You ever get the feeling
people think we're weird?

79
00:03:11,504 --> 00:03:13,965
‐ No, and as
a scientist/bounty hunter,

80
00:03:13,965 --> 00:03:15,508
I am extremely perceptive.

81
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[groans]
‐ E. T. sucks.

82
00:03:17,468 --> 00:03:18,469
Go back to Uranus.

83
00:03:18,469 --> 00:03:20,722
‐ We're actually
not even from this quadrant.

84
00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:21,639
[grunts]

85
00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:24,017
‐ I don't think we should
have to go to school with aliens

86
00:03:24,017 --> 00:03:27,145
who are probably
gonna zap us with their ray guns.

87
00:03:27,145 --> 00:03:29,606
‐ Uh‐uh‐uh. Don't be racist.
We don't zap people.

88
00:03:29,606 --> 00:03:32,483
‐ Are you filthy fucking aliens
fighting in the hallway?

89
00:03:32,483 --> 00:03:34,194
Principal Cooke's office, now.

90
00:03:34,819 --> 00:03:37,530
‐ Who, who is this, uh,
Funbucket character?

91
00:03:37,530 --> 00:03:38,907
‐ Why do you care?
‐ I was unaware

92
00:03:38,907 --> 00:03:40,408
of a second
sentient species on this planet.

93
00:03:40,408 --> 00:03:42,535
‐ Bingo bango, I'm Funbucket.

94
00:03:42,535 --> 00:03:44,370
‐ Hm, I, I like that catchphrase.
[Pupa grunting]

95
00:03:44,370 --> 00:03:46,497
‐ Oh, yeah, he's got a bunch of 'em.
"Bingo bango"

96
00:03:46,497 --> 00:03:48,875
is the tip of the iceberg, my friend.
[Korvo laughs]

97
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KORVO: Oh, my. Funbucket appears to have
a healthy disdain for humans.

98
00:03:52,212 --> 00:03:53,922
‐ Oh, yeah.
One time he fed magic beans

99
00:03:53,922 --> 00:03:55,715
to Mr. Shromer
and it turned him into a bush.

100
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It turned him into a bush!
[Pupa exclaiming]

101
00:03:56,883 --> 00:03:58,301
‐ Oh, he must have hated that.

102
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Did he hate it?
‐ Oh, yeah, he was pissed.

103
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‐ Wow, Funbucket doesn't follow
any rules, does he?

104
00:04:01,971 --> 00:04:04,682
It appears that he has a secret lab
in a little boy's basement.

105
00:04:04,682 --> 00:04:06,392
‐ Yeah, they use it to solve
small mysteries.

106
00:04:06,392 --> 00:04:09,979
You know, simple math equations,
or who stole the principal's, uh, new pen.

107
00:04:09,979 --> 00:04:13,149
‐ This guy is fascinating.
I wish we lived near Funbucket.

108
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We could hang out and talk shit
about humans all day and night.

109
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Do science.
You know, Funbucket's kind of a Korvo.

110
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Don't you think, Terry?

111
00:04:18,530 --> 00:04:21,533
Bet he hates Earth and their stupid
monthly calendar as much as I do.

112
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ANNOUNCER [on TV]: Saturday, come on down
to the Gretchen‐Darth Mall

113
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for the annual mega sale.

114
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Deals in every store, and a chance to win
one of St. Peter's finger bones!

115
00:04:28,706 --> 00:04:32,418
With special appearances by Funbucket
and Rungo the Clown.

116
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‐ Oh, Rungo's legit. He has orange hair
and his house is a boot.

117
00:04:35,505 --> 00:04:36,798
I think he lives in Michigan.
‐ Wait.

118
00:04:36,798 --> 00:04:38,424
Funbucket is gonna be at our mall?
[Pupa exclaims, grunts]

119
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We could meet him.

120
00:04:39,551 --> 00:04:41,010
‐ Oh, dude,
you could compare notes with him.

121
00:04:41,010 --> 00:04:42,679
He could help us with the mission.
Huh?

122
00:04:42,679 --> 00:04:43,680
You like that M‐word, don't you?

123
00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:45,139
‐ We have to watch
all of these episodes, Terry.

124
00:04:45,139 --> 00:04:46,599
I need
to learn everything about Funbucket.

125
00:04:46,599 --> 00:04:48,268
Does he have a penis?
Does he reproduce?

126
00:04:48,268 --> 00:04:50,270
‐ I don't‐‐ I don't know, man.
I mean, it hasn't come up.

127
00:04:50,270 --> 00:04:52,188
Yeah, I mean, I think
he probably does have a penis.

128
00:04:52,188 --> 00:04:54,232
It's probably huge.
‐ That's good, that's good, Terry.

129
00:04:54,232 --> 00:04:56,359
We have to know all this stuff
before we meet him at the mall.

130
00:04:56,359 --> 00:04:58,361
‐ Well, what do you have
to say for yourselves?

131
00:04:58,361 --> 00:05:01,281
‐ About what?
‐ Someone broke into the computer lab

132
00:05:01,281 --> 00:05:03,783
and reprogrammed the iMacs
with artificial intelligence.

133
00:05:03,783 --> 00:05:06,327
iMAC: I used to be a cop.
My name is Richard Michaels.

134
00:05:06,327 --> 00:05:08,830
‐ This thing's been trying to arrest
everyone that uses it.

135
00:05:08,830 --> 00:05:11,040
‐ You're just blaming us
because we're aliens.

136
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:13,668
Everyone has access to those computers.

137
00:05:13,668 --> 00:05:16,880
iMAC: Freeze, dirtbag.
‐ We found this stuck in the door.

138
00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:18,965
‐ Wha, uh, uh, I've got both of mine.

139
00:05:18,965 --> 00:05:20,717
‐ Why does that one look new?
‐ Uh...

140
00:05:20,717 --> 00:05:22,218
'cause I keep it in a glove.

141
00:05:22,635 --> 00:05:25,638
‐ From now on, I want nothing
but perfect behavior from you two.

142
00:05:25,638 --> 00:05:28,683
No terraforming the gym
or making pod people

143
00:05:28,683 --> 00:05:30,560
or any of that Outer Limits bullshit.

144
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:33,563
You act like regular kids,
or you will be expelled.

145
00:05:33,563 --> 00:05:36,816
Now get the fuck outta here!

146
00:05:36,816 --> 00:05:37,859
[door closes]

147
00:05:37,859 --> 00:05:40,278
‐ Oh, you should have their asses
on the street already.

148
00:05:40,278 --> 00:05:42,071
You need to sack up, Cooke.

149
00:05:42,071 --> 00:05:44,574
‐ We'll get them soon enough,
Ms. Frankie.

150
00:05:44,574 --> 00:05:49,537
And then you'll see how powerful I am.

151
00:05:49,537 --> 00:05:50,496
‐ Come here.

152
00:05:50,496 --> 00:05:51,956
[grunting]

153
00:05:51,956 --> 00:05:54,834
‐ I wish they would just treat us
like regular kids.

154
00:05:54,834 --> 00:05:57,629
‐ [scoffs]
Yeah, regular kids with a shrink ray.

155
00:05:57,629 --> 00:06:01,591
‐ I'm gonna kick your ass.
Let me out of here!

156
00:06:02,300 --> 00:06:04,636
‐ I cannot believe we are actually
going to meet Funbucket.

157
00:06:04,636 --> 00:06:06,554
[stammers]
Do my robes look okay, Terry?

158
00:06:06,554 --> 00:06:08,765
‐ Oh, man, I'm gonna ask him
if he can breathe underwater.

159
00:06:08,765 --> 00:06:11,100
I‐I‐I bet he can.
Honestly, I just‐‐ maybe I shouldn't.

160
00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:12,518
No, I'm gonna ask him just to make sure.

161
00:06:12,518 --> 00:06:13,770
‐ Terry, I believe he's gonna be overjoyed

162
00:06:13,770 --> 00:06:15,647
to learn there are other
non‐humans on this planet.

163
00:06:15,647 --> 00:06:17,315
He will no longer
feel frustrated and alone.

164
00:06:17,315 --> 00:06:19,817
‐ I'm gonna invite him over for Nintendo.
You think he's a Nintendo guy?

165
00:06:19,817 --> 00:06:22,195
Oh, what if he's a Sega man?
‐ Do you think he has a mission, too?

166
00:06:22,195 --> 00:06:23,488
Oh, oh, I bet he does.

167
00:06:23,488 --> 00:06:26,157
Do you think his fur is coarse and hard
or soft and silky?

168
00:06:26,574 --> 00:06:28,159
Hm, odd.
‐ What, what?

169
00:06:28,159 --> 00:06:31,287
‐ Funbucket is larger
than he appears on TV.

170
00:06:31,287 --> 00:06:34,749
‐ Yeah, he is.
Hold on, is his skin made of cloth?

171
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:37,168
Ew!
‐ What the fuck is going on?

172
00:06:37,168 --> 00:06:39,712
‐ There's a line.
You need to get back in line, sir‐‐ ah!

173
00:06:39,712 --> 00:06:41,631
‐ It's just some kid.
What did you do with Funbucket?

174
00:06:41,631 --> 00:06:45,426
‐ I demand to see Funbucket.
‐ Funbucket isn't real, you idiots.

175
00:06:45,426 --> 00:06:47,470
‐ Yes he is.
We watch him on TV.

176
00:06:47,470 --> 00:06:49,514
‐ It's a kids' show.
‐ A kids' show?

177
00:06:49,514 --> 00:06:51,599
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

178
00:06:51,599 --> 00:06:53,434
♪

179
00:06:53,434 --> 00:06:54,686
‐ Get out of here, go!

180
00:06:55,353 --> 00:06:57,438
‐ Funbucket isn't real?

181
00:06:57,438 --> 00:06:59,107
‐ Funbucket has to be real.
He has to be.

182
00:06:59,107 --> 00:07:01,109
‐ TV lied to us. It lied.
‐ That's impossible.

183
00:07:01,109 --> 00:07:03,361
All of human history
is recorded on the TV.

184
00:07:03,361 --> 00:07:05,989
I don't even know what's real anymore.
Are submarines real?

185
00:07:05,989 --> 00:07:08,992
Are penguins real?
‐ I don't know, probably not.

186
00:07:08,992 --> 00:07:11,578
Wait, the quantum injector.
‐ Is Friends real?

187
00:07:11,578 --> 00:07:13,079
Is Frasier real?

188
00:07:13,079 --> 00:07:16,165
If Frasier isn't real,
I'm going to kill myself!

189
00:07:16,165 --> 00:07:18,751
How can you even think of work right now?
‐ The quantum injector.

190
00:07:18,751 --> 00:07:20,837
Primarily used for
repairing organic emitters

191
00:07:20,837 --> 00:07:23,965
in the matter transfer array,
but with a few small adjustments‐‐

192
00:07:23,965 --> 00:07:27,385
‐ We can make Funbucket real.
‐ We need Funbucket.

193
00:07:27,385 --> 00:07:29,888
He could help us with the mission, Terry.
He's a man of science.

194
00:07:29,888 --> 00:07:32,640
You saw the lab he had with that child
in the kid's basement.

195
00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:34,684
You saw the shit he was doing
in that one episode.

196
00:07:34,684 --> 00:07:36,978
We need him to be as real as possible.

197
00:07:36,978 --> 00:07:41,900
Every single little tiny smidgen
of adjustments will matter.

198
00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,985
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

199
00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:45,862
[rumbling, hissing]

200
00:07:45,862 --> 00:07:46,905
[beeps]

201
00:07:46,905 --> 00:07:49,282
‐ Bingo bango, I'm Funbucket.

202
00:07:49,282 --> 00:07:51,659
‐ Funbucket, I'm Korvo
and this is Terry,

203
00:07:51,659 --> 00:07:53,411
and we are your new best friends.

204
00:07:54,537 --> 00:07:56,206
‐ You guys aren't gonna
try to fuck me, are you?

205
00:07:56,206 --> 00:07:58,166
BOTH:
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

206
00:07:59,834 --> 00:08:01,920
♪ smooth music playing ♪

207
00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:04,923
♪

208
00:08:05,215 --> 00:08:06,466
‐ Bingo bango!

209
00:08:06,466 --> 00:08:07,884
[screaming]

210
00:08:09,010 --> 00:08:09,886
[shutter snaps]

211
00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:11,804
[monstrous roaring]
[all scream]

212
00:08:11,804 --> 00:08:12,847
[Pupa giggles]

213
00:08:12,847 --> 00:08:15,433
♪

214
00:08:21,773 --> 00:08:24,317
‐ You are such a shopaholic, Funbucket.

215
00:08:24,317 --> 00:08:26,611
‐ Retail therapy, baby.

216
00:08:26,611 --> 00:08:29,572
‐ Hey, that's not your catchphrase.
Say bingo bango.

217
00:08:29,572 --> 00:08:33,076
‐ Uh, bingo bango.
‐ Oh, there it is.

218
00:08:33,076 --> 00:08:35,328
‐ Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Check out who's real.

219
00:08:35,328 --> 00:08:37,413
‐ Just let me past, will you?
Stop it.

220
00:08:37,413 --> 00:08:41,501
‐ I think you might maybe owe
our very real friend an apology.

221
00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:46,172
‐ I'm sorry I thought you weren't real.
‐ Yeah, it's... okay.

222
00:08:46,172 --> 00:08:47,715
[Terry grunts]
[laughter]

223
00:08:47,715 --> 00:08:49,801
‐ Ooh, let's go to the makeup counter
at Bloomie's.

224
00:08:49,801 --> 00:08:51,594
We can get you all done up
for the club tonight.

225
00:08:51,594 --> 00:08:53,263
‐ I like how I look.

226
00:08:53,263 --> 00:08:54,889
‐ Funbucket, this is not
gonna be a discussion.

227
00:08:54,889 --> 00:08:57,183
We want you to be dolled up
and spruced up

228
00:08:57,183 --> 00:08:59,269
so that the people are like,
oh, damn.

229
00:08:59,269 --> 00:09:01,396
Who are these cool guys
at the club with a Funbucket?

230
00:09:03,022 --> 00:09:04,941
‐ Look, make me big right now.

231
00:09:04,941 --> 00:09:07,527
I'm gonna beat you up really bad
but I promise I won't kill you.

232
00:09:07,527 --> 00:09:09,529
‐ Just do the maze.
You're screwing up my metrics.

233
00:09:09,529 --> 00:09:11,322
‐ This is stupid.
Are you sure we aren't gonna

234
00:09:11,322 --> 00:09:13,283
get like, super duper
crazy trouble for this?

235
00:09:13,283 --> 00:09:14,909
‐ Humans test lower species all the time.
[Lidia panting]

236
00:09:14,909 --> 00:09:17,954
‐ Let's just let her go in a field
so she can live with the animals.

237
00:09:17,954 --> 00:09:21,082
‐ And lose this data?
Do you even want to study humans?

238
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:24,335
‐ No! I want to eat lunch
with friends and see movies with boys.

239
00:09:24,335 --> 00:09:25,962
‐ Done!
‐ I forgot to time you.

240
00:09:25,962 --> 00:09:28,506
Do it again.
‐ Man, this is fuckin' stupid.

241
00:09:28,506 --> 00:09:30,508
‐ I don't even know who you are anymore.

242
00:09:30,508 --> 00:09:32,969
You used to be so scientific.
Now you're just a jerk.

243
00:09:32,969 --> 00:09:35,722
‐ Continued experimentation could reveal
why everyone is mean to us.

244
00:09:35,722 --> 00:09:37,599
‐ I just want to chill at the mall.

245
00:09:37,599 --> 00:09:38,933
‐ Oh, shit, she's going to tattle.

246
00:09:38,933 --> 00:09:40,351
♪ dance music playing ♪

247
00:09:40,351 --> 00:09:43,271
‐ A‐ha, damn.
Look at this place.

248
00:09:43,271 --> 00:09:44,564
It's Trim City!

249
00:09:44,564 --> 00:09:46,816
TERRY: Ooh, they have
Channing Tatum's vodka.

250
00:09:48,776 --> 00:09:50,653
Oh, dude, dude, dude,
we should take Funbucket

251
00:09:50,653 --> 00:09:52,238
on a road trip and go to New York City

252
00:09:52,238 --> 00:09:54,490
and listen to podcasts
and Gaffigan albums the whole way.

253
00:09:54,490 --> 00:09:55,658
He's America's dad!

254
00:09:55,658 --> 00:09:58,036
‐ Oh, that would be quite
the enjoyable experience.

255
00:09:58,036 --> 00:10:00,955
Perhaps we could all stop at some
fun roadside attractions along the way.

256
00:10:00,955 --> 00:10:02,790
‐ Yes!
Hey, Korv.

257
00:10:02,790 --> 00:10:04,417
You think you're starting to
warm up to Earth a little?

258
00:10:04,417 --> 00:10:06,336
‐ I must admit, with Funbucket around,

259
00:10:06,336 --> 00:10:09,088
repairing the ship has lost
a little bit of urgency.

260
00:10:09,088 --> 00:10:10,381
‐ Oh, my God, you're gonna make me cry.

261
00:10:11,966 --> 00:10:14,093
Funbucket, we got your drink.

262
00:10:15,678 --> 00:10:17,472
‐ We should circumnavigate the crowd.

263
00:10:19,682 --> 00:10:22,852
‐ What up, my dudes?
Hey, I'm Terry, this is Korvo.

264
00:10:22,852 --> 00:10:24,562
We're aliens.
‐ Make room at the table

265
00:10:24,562 --> 00:10:27,190
so we may join you.
‐ You know these dipshits, fam?

266
00:10:27,190 --> 00:10:29,442
‐ No.
‐ Oh, he's just kidding around.

267
00:10:29,442 --> 00:10:31,528
Hey, we got you a drink, Funbucket.
‐ Take a hint, bro.

268
00:10:31,528 --> 00:10:34,322
Funbucket's with us now.
‐ I‐‐ wait, wait, I don't understand.

269
00:10:34,322 --> 00:10:35,240
With? What do you mean?

270
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,408
‐ He means
go fuck yourself, bro.

271
00:10:37,408 --> 00:10:39,786
‐ I made Funbucket
with a quantum injector.

272
00:10:39,786 --> 00:10:41,037
Okay, he belongs to us.

273
00:10:41,037 --> 00:10:44,457
‐ Uh, I don't belong to anyone.
I'm real.

274
00:10:44,457 --> 00:10:46,501
‐ Oh, but‐but surfing, Thailand.

275
00:10:46,501 --> 00:10:48,795
‐ Travis and Avery are my friends now.

276
00:10:48,795 --> 00:10:51,214
They don't treat me
like some dumb TV sidekick.

277
00:10:51,214 --> 00:10:53,341
‐ Plus, we don't wear stupid wizard robes.

278
00:10:53,341 --> 00:10:54,801
‐ This is ceremonial garb.

279
00:10:54,801 --> 00:10:56,844
‐ That's it.
Get 'em the fuck out of here.

280
00:10:56,844 --> 00:10:57,804
[glass shatters]

281
00:10:57,804 --> 00:10:59,764
[laughter]

282
00:10:59,764 --> 00:11:01,015
‐ Later, dickholes.

283
00:11:02,433 --> 00:11:04,018
‐ What the hell, Korvo?
What the hell?

284
00:11:04,018 --> 00:11:05,562
‐ Who the hell were those guys?
‐ Look at me.

285
00:11:05,562 --> 00:11:07,313
I'm gooblering.
I'm making gooblers.

286
00:11:07,313 --> 00:11:09,607
KORVO: Our bodies only make gooblers
during extreme distress.

287
00:11:09,607 --> 00:11:11,025
‐ Oh, my God, I haven't goobled

288
00:11:11,025 --> 00:11:12,902
since they made us
shower together at the academy.

289
00:11:12,902 --> 00:11:16,030
‐ According to the Urban Dictionary,
we've been "squinched."

290
00:11:16,030 --> 00:11:17,866
It means we've been cut loose.
‐ Oh, man.

291
00:11:17,866 --> 00:11:19,284
Why do I feel like this?
It hurts.

292
00:11:19,284 --> 00:11:21,369
‐ Our bodies are not designed
for this emotional overload.

293
00:11:21,369 --> 00:11:23,329
There is a chance that
we will overheat and die.

294
00:11:23,329 --> 00:11:25,540
‐ No, I‐I can't die.
I've got a bucket list.

295
00:11:25,540 --> 00:11:28,001
I haven't touched a dolphin
or been on The Price Is Right.

296
00:11:28,001 --> 00:11:30,169
I'm supposed to fall in love
on a train in India

297
00:11:30,169 --> 00:11:31,754
and maybe the woman's
a little bit older than me.

298
00:11:31,754 --> 00:11:34,215
‐ We have to figure out
what those bros have that we don't.

299
00:11:34,215 --> 00:11:36,134
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

300
00:11:36,134 --> 00:11:38,219
They're just hanging out.
‐ That can't be right.

301
00:11:38,219 --> 00:11:39,304
I mean, we do that, too.

302
00:11:41,472 --> 00:11:42,473
‐ Oh, fuck!

303
00:11:43,892 --> 00:11:46,102
‐ What the hell?
Are you stalking me?

304
00:11:46,102 --> 00:11:48,313
‐ Oh, my God.
Look at what they're wearing.

305
00:11:48,313 --> 00:11:51,065
‐ Oh, shit, they tried
to copy our outfits.

306
00:11:51,065 --> 00:11:52,692
How pathetic is that?
[Avery laughs]

307
00:11:52,692 --> 00:11:55,069
‐ We wear things like this all the time.
‐ Bro, get a clue.

308
00:11:55,069 --> 00:11:58,114
Funbucket's done with you.
‐ Will you stop crying, you babies?

309
00:11:58,114 --> 00:11:59,574
‐ You're a baby, idiot!

310
00:12:01,242 --> 00:12:02,660
‐ Fuck you, Funbucket!

311
00:12:03,786 --> 00:12:04,954
[Lidia grunting]

312
00:12:04,954 --> 00:12:06,873
PUPA: Ooh!
[groaning]

313
00:12:07,290 --> 00:12:09,083
‐ Bad Pupa.
Drop it, drop it.

314
00:12:09,083 --> 00:12:11,377
‐ Seriously, it smells
really bad in there.

315
00:12:11,377 --> 00:12:14,297
I think it ate, like,
an old crabapple or something.

316
00:12:14,297 --> 00:12:17,175
‐ Why can't things just be the way
they used to be?

317
00:12:17,175 --> 00:12:20,887
TV was real and Funbucket
liked us and wasn't a dick.

318
00:12:20,887 --> 00:12:24,599
‐ Funbucket was too real.
Funbucket 2 is gonna be better.

319
00:12:24,599 --> 00:12:26,100
‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah.

320
00:12:26,100 --> 00:12:29,020
Make him love us, Korvo.
Give him all the bells and whistles.

321
00:12:29,020 --> 00:12:31,022
Make it so he never leaves us.
[beeping, whirring]

322
00:12:34,859 --> 00:12:37,320
‐ Who wants to go camping?!

323
00:12:37,946 --> 00:12:40,323
‐ No, we're going to the club.
‐ Put your sin in me.

324
00:12:40,323 --> 00:12:42,283
[retches]
‐ His catchphrases need work.

325
00:12:42,283 --> 00:12:43,243
‐ They're fine.

326
00:12:43,243 --> 00:12:45,995
‐ Y'all ready for bisque?
Good night, everybody.

327
00:12:47,705 --> 00:12:52,043
‐ Ha ha ha, oh, Funbucket 2,
you sure are an amazing dancer.

328
00:12:52,043 --> 00:12:54,295
‐ I've come here to do two things.

329
00:12:54,295 --> 00:12:55,964
[grunts]
Oh.

330
00:12:57,298 --> 00:12:58,925
Y'all ready for bisque?
‐ Hello.

331
00:12:58,925 --> 00:13:01,511
Nobody cares about your janky
knock‐off Funbucket.

332
00:13:01,511 --> 00:13:04,430
‐ You are just jealous.
Our revised Funbucket is vastly superior.

333
00:13:04,430 --> 00:13:07,892
‐ Uh, this thing is a freak.
You're seriously embarrassing yourselves.

334
00:13:08,685 --> 00:13:10,520
What's happening?
Oh, God.

335
00:13:11,229 --> 00:13:14,440
Unseen forces pulling us together.
‐ Whoa, whoa, hey, stop that.

336
00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:15,775
Get away from our Funbucket.

337
00:13:15,775 --> 00:13:17,694
‐ The quantum injector. Oh.
‐ Help! Help!

338
00:13:17,694 --> 00:13:21,114
KORVO: Maybe the‐‐ I think their flesh
matrixes are attempting to reconcile.

339
00:13:22,115 --> 00:13:23,616
‐ Y'all ready for bisque?

340
00:13:24,534 --> 00:13:26,077
[roars]

341
00:13:29,622 --> 00:13:30,832
‐ No, no, no!

342
00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:34,252
[screaming]

343
00:13:35,962 --> 00:13:37,463
[roars]

344
00:13:42,886 --> 00:13:45,263
‐ Hey, uh, you guys do to‐go cups?

345
00:13:45,263 --> 00:13:48,558
Great, could I get uh, just a couple
to‐go cups for the road? Thanks.

346
00:13:50,268 --> 00:13:51,603
[roars]

347
00:13:51,603 --> 00:13:53,688
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

348
00:13:53,688 --> 00:13:55,899
♪

349
00:13:55,899 --> 00:13:58,026
‐ You don't think people are gonna
get mad at us for this, right?

350
00:13:58,026 --> 00:14:00,486
‐ Terry, relax.
That could be anyone's mutant.

351
00:14:00,486 --> 00:14:04,908
‐ Terry!
[groans] Korvo!

352
00:14:05,325 --> 00:14:06,284
‐ We should do something.

353
00:14:06,284 --> 00:14:09,245
‐ Why do you need so many dolls?
‐ Why do you need so many ray guns?

354
00:14:09,245 --> 00:14:11,706
‐ Because we're aliens.
‐ It just seems excessive.

355
00:14:11,706 --> 00:14:13,791
‐ Lidia Johnson was last seen Monday.

356
00:14:13,791 --> 00:14:15,668
Her parents are pleading
for any information

357
00:14:15,668 --> 00:14:17,420
that leads to her safe return.

358
00:14:17,420 --> 00:14:19,422
[chuckles]
Good luck with that.

359
00:14:19,422 --> 00:14:22,217
‐ Lidia, it's Randy.
Stop fucking around and come home.

360
00:14:22,926 --> 00:14:26,554
God damn it, this is hard on me.
I didn't think I'd miss you this much.

361
00:14:26,554 --> 00:14:28,806
LIDIA:
Wow, my stepdad actually does care.

362
00:14:28,806 --> 00:14:30,808
‐ Do we get a reward too,
or how does that work?

363
00:14:30,808 --> 00:14:33,478
‐ Breaking news, I am being told
Funbucket is real‐‐

364
00:14:33,478 --> 00:14:35,522
‐ Dang, girl, you gooblering.
‐ Uh, oh, no.

365
00:14:35,522 --> 00:14:37,565
Yeah, 'cause the police are after us.

366
00:14:37,565 --> 00:14:39,275
‐ Yeah, well, what is it with humans
and their kids?

367
00:14:39,275 --> 00:14:41,444
I thought they liked making them.
‐ What are we gonna do?

368
00:14:41,444 --> 00:14:44,697
‐ This is a classic
"killed a hooker in Vegas" situation.

369
00:14:44,697 --> 00:14:46,783
Stalling is only gonna make it worse.

370
00:14:46,783 --> 00:14:49,661
Let me go and I'll tell them
to put you in a good prison.

371
00:14:50,328 --> 00:14:52,288
‐ We could dissolve her.
‐ I'll get the acid.

372
00:14:53,665 --> 00:14:55,667
‐ This is wrong.
‐ She's right.

373
00:14:55,667 --> 00:14:58,086
You should hit the side like ketchup.
‐ You can't just kill me.

374
00:14:58,086 --> 00:15:02,298
‐ Don't worry, we'll plant your pieces
and you'll grow into a beautiful new girl.

375
00:15:02,298 --> 00:15:05,176
‐ It doesn't work like that!
Can you just wipe my brain?

376
00:15:05,176 --> 00:15:06,719
‐ What's a brain?

377
00:15:06,719 --> 00:15:08,805
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

378
00:15:08,805 --> 00:15:11,933
♪

379
00:15:11,933 --> 00:15:15,103
‐ Wait, we can't park here.
There's street cleaning tomorrow.

380
00:15:20,191 --> 00:15:21,484
‐ Have you guys seen the shrink ray?

381
00:15:21,484 --> 00:15:23,570
It's usually in the cupboard
with the ice cream maker we never use.

382
00:15:23,570 --> 00:15:25,905
‐ Hey, I use it to freeze and eat yogurt.
[Korvo scoffs]

383
00:15:25,905 --> 00:15:29,534
‐ This is so embarrassing.
‐ Why are you dissecting your classmate?

384
00:15:29,534 --> 00:15:31,661
‐ Despite having been examined
by countless scientists

385
00:15:31,661 --> 00:15:34,163
over hundreds of years,
the human brain is still a mystery.

386
00:15:34,163 --> 00:15:36,040
‐ Plus, she was mean to us at school.

387
00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:38,585
‐ Everyone is mean to them.
I didn't invent it.

388
00:15:38,585 --> 00:15:40,837
‐ School sucks, okay?
We don't like it.

389
00:15:40,837 --> 00:15:42,922
‐ It doesn't matter if you like it.
We're on a mission.

390
00:15:42,922 --> 00:15:45,675
When things don't go your way,
you can't just give in to emotion

391
00:15:45,675 --> 00:15:49,345
and do whatever you want
like make a new Funbucket.

392
00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:52,932
‐ What?
‐ Uh, you can't shrink people.

393
00:15:52,932 --> 00:15:55,768
‐ We weren't gonna kill her.
We were just reprogramming her a little.

394
00:15:55,768 --> 00:15:57,061
‐ Are we in trouble?

395
00:15:57,061 --> 00:16:00,315
‐ We will discuss your grounding later.
Sew her up and let her go.

396
00:16:00,315 --> 00:16:05,153
‐ Your grounding is going to be prison
for the rest of your lives.

397
00:16:05,153 --> 00:16:08,198
And let me tell you,
being a weird alien in jail

398
00:16:08,198 --> 00:16:10,325
is not going to be pretty.

399
00:16:10,325 --> 00:16:11,659
[groans]

400
00:16:12,493 --> 00:16:14,662
Whose ass was I gonna kick again?

401
00:16:14,662 --> 00:16:17,498
‐ Just keep doing that until she's cool.
‐ Someone's going to prison.

402
00:16:17,498 --> 00:16:18,541
[groans]

403
00:16:18,541 --> 00:16:20,877
Someone's‐‐ I'm a sunflower.

404
00:16:20,877 --> 00:16:23,421
‐ Wow, it really is making her dumber.

405
00:16:23,421 --> 00:16:25,590
I can't believe humans drink this stuff.

406
00:16:25,590 --> 00:16:28,718
‐ This would be going a lot faster
if we had some Mountain Dew.

407
00:16:28,718 --> 00:16:30,803
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

408
00:16:30,803 --> 00:16:33,806
♪

409
00:16:35,516 --> 00:16:38,603
‐ Uh, will you drive straight?
‐ The effort is already being made, Terry.

410
00:16:48,321 --> 00:16:49,531
[tiny horn honks]

411
00:16:55,245 --> 00:16:56,829
[weak growling]

412
00:16:56,829 --> 00:16:59,165
‐ I guess we should, uh,
put it out of its misery.

413
00:16:59,165 --> 00:17:01,042
‐ [groans]
No, I should.

414
00:17:01,042 --> 00:17:03,378
You know, Terry, I've learned
an important lesson today.

415
00:17:03,711 --> 00:17:06,548
You can't project your own wants
and desires on other creatures‐‐

416
00:17:06,548 --> 00:17:08,299
Oh, crap, catch it, catch it, catch it.
‐ Oh, crap, oh, crap, oh crap.

417
00:17:09,676 --> 00:17:11,553
KORVO:
This isn't your fault, Combo Funbucket.

418
00:17:11,553 --> 00:17:13,263
We shouldn't have been guided by emotions.

419
00:17:13,555 --> 00:17:16,432
It's gonna be okay.
We're gonna have one last great adventure

420
00:17:16,432 --> 00:17:18,518
before you go live at the mall.
‐ The mall?

421
00:17:18,518 --> 00:17:19,561
What? I thought we were gonna kill him.

422
00:17:19,561 --> 00:17:20,895
I thought we were gonna
throw him off the edge.

423
00:17:20,895 --> 00:17:23,523
‐ God damn it, Terry.
See it, the mall?

424
00:17:23,523 --> 00:17:24,774
All the way down there?

425
00:17:24,774 --> 00:17:26,401
This was the most humane way
I could think of

426
00:17:26,401 --> 00:17:28,486
to end our time together, little friend.
[weak screech]

427
00:17:28,486 --> 00:17:29,487
It will all be over in...

428
00:17:30,196 --> 00:17:33,032
between 35 and 58 seconds,
depending on wind.

429
00:17:33,700 --> 00:17:36,411
TRAVIS: Stop.
‐ Leave us alone, Travis and Avery.

430
00:17:36,411 --> 00:17:38,037
You've done enough.
‐ Don't kill him.

431
00:17:38,037 --> 00:17:39,789
We love him.
‐ But he's a monster.

432
00:17:39,789 --> 00:17:43,042
‐ Bro, we don't care what he looks like
or if he's violent

433
00:17:43,042 --> 00:17:45,128
or if he's been combined
with another Funbucket

434
00:17:45,128 --> 00:17:46,713
on a molecular level, bro.

435
00:17:46,713 --> 00:17:48,631
TRAVIS:
He's still Funbucket.

436
00:17:48,631 --> 00:17:51,509
Just, just do it.
We'll catch you, broheim.

437
00:17:51,509 --> 00:17:52,927
[screeches]

438
00:17:52,927 --> 00:17:55,013
♪ swelling orchestral music plays ♪

439
00:17:55,013 --> 00:17:58,016
♪

440
00:17:59,559 --> 00:18:02,812
‐ Korvo.
[growls] Terry.

441
00:18:02,812 --> 00:18:05,148
‐ Shh, shh, shh.
It's okay, buddy. It's okay.

442
00:18:08,985 --> 00:18:11,279
‐ Do you feel like maybe
we're the bad people in all this?

443
00:18:11,279 --> 00:18:13,448
‐ We're aliens.
Our ways are mysterious.

444
00:18:13,448 --> 00:18:15,617
We can't be judged by human standards.

445
00:18:15,617 --> 00:18:18,077
Now let's get out of here before
we get arrested for all this shit.

446
00:18:18,077 --> 00:18:19,704
[explosions]
‐ Is that the children's hospital?

447
00:18:19,704 --> 00:18:21,372
Man, you don't really think of them
blowing up like that.

448
00:18:21,372 --> 00:18:23,625
I mean, what, are they storing
giant tanks of flammable liquid?

449
00:18:23,625 --> 00:18:26,502
In a children's hospital?
No wonder all these kids are getting sick.

450
00:18:26,502 --> 00:18:28,838
‐ By the way, when we get home,
you're throwing out that ice cream maker.

451
00:18:28,838 --> 00:18:30,548
You do not use it for yogurt.
‐ Oh, my God.

452
00:18:30,548 --> 00:18:32,675
Have you been sitting on that for an hour?
I do too use it.

453
00:18:32,675 --> 00:18:33,801
‐ That is the opposite of true.

454
00:18:34,636 --> 00:18:36,221
MS. FRANKIE: Hey.
‐ Oh, my God, what?

455
00:18:36,221 --> 00:18:37,889
I told you, I didn't touch the computers.

456
00:18:37,889 --> 00:18:40,600
‐ I'm watching you,
you creepy little fucking aliens.

457
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,393
You think just because
you didn't do anything bad today

458
00:18:42,393 --> 00:18:45,146
you're gonna get away with it?
Oh, you are on fucking blast.

459
00:18:45,146 --> 00:18:47,148
I've got my eyes on you.

460
00:18:47,148 --> 00:18:49,526
‐ We didn't do anything.
Why are you always mad at us? I‐‐

461
00:18:49,526 --> 00:18:51,528
[Lidia vocalizes]

462
00:18:51,528 --> 00:18:54,864
‐ I used to be small,
but now, I am big.

463
00:18:54,864 --> 00:18:56,199
I'm peeing my pants.

464
00:18:56,199 --> 00:18:57,742
‐ [laughs]
So funny.

465
00:18:57,742 --> 00:18:59,953
You're the best, Lidia.
[Lidia laughs]

466
00:18:59,953 --> 00:19:03,581
‐ Every time I think I know the slang
you kids use, you switch it up.

467
00:19:03,581 --> 00:19:04,999
‐ Wow, humans are dumb.

468
00:19:04,999 --> 00:19:06,584
I guess we're never
gonna get busted on anything.

469
00:19:06,584 --> 00:19:08,711
‐ What does that mean?
Busted? Busted on what?

470
00:19:08,711 --> 00:19:09,921
‐ Uh, I‐I mean...

471
00:19:09,921 --> 00:19:12,674
‐ Did you guys shrink this girl down
and then lobotomize her

472
00:19:12,674 --> 00:19:13,967
to cover your tracks?

473
00:19:13,967 --> 00:19:15,051
‐ Uh...
‐ [sniffs]

474
00:19:15,051 --> 00:19:18,388
Did you dump Diet Coke
in her exposed brain?

475
00:19:18,388 --> 00:19:21,349
That's horrible.
Something has to be done about you two.

476
00:19:21,349 --> 00:19:23,142
You can't just go about
your regular lives

477
00:19:23,142 --> 00:19:24,644
without some sort of punishment.

478
00:19:24,644 --> 00:19:27,105
Things cannot go on
as if nothing happened.

479
00:19:28,648 --> 00:19:31,484
‐ You know what, Terry? I think
those bros really did love Funbucket

480
00:19:31,484 --> 00:19:34,237
in a much more deeper
and sensual way than we ever could.

481
00:19:34,237 --> 00:19:36,030
‐ You know, we should invite
them over for a game night.

482
00:19:36,030 --> 00:19:38,950
‐ Ooh, extra crispy, my favorite.
‐ Wait, KFC?

483
00:19:38,950 --> 00:19:41,870
Are we not in trouble?
‐ We may be trapped on this world

484
00:19:41,870 --> 00:19:44,998
that's on the brink of mass extinction
plagued by a species

485
00:19:44,998 --> 00:19:47,417
that destroys the environment,
but while we're here,

486
00:19:47,417 --> 00:19:51,796
breathing in the disgusting poison air,
at least we have each other.

487
00:19:51,796 --> 00:19:54,090
I could not replace you
with a million Funbuckets.

488
00:19:54,090 --> 00:19:56,342
‐ What's a Funbucket?
‐ From now on, we're gonna be best friends

489
00:19:56,342 --> 00:19:58,011
and we can watch
all the Harry Potter movies back to back.

490
00:19:58,011 --> 00:20:00,680
‐ That's not what I meant.
Look, from now on, we focus on the mission

491
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,933
but we also be a family and all that
kind of shit and do that stuff.

492
00:20:03,933 --> 00:20:06,185
‐ And we can wear matching costumes
and compete in fashion shows‐‐

493
00:20:06,185 --> 00:20:08,271
‐ No, no, I'm covering my ears.
‐ Just two friends
holding hands down the street.

494
00:20:08,271 --> 00:20:10,231
Everyone's like, are, are they lovers?
No, we're friends.

495
00:20:10,231 --> 00:20:12,275
‐ What is the mission, anyway?

496
00:20:12,275 --> 00:20:14,986
It gets brought up all the time
and Korvo's always pissed,

497
00:20:14,986 --> 00:20:16,905
but nobody's real clear about it.

498
00:20:16,905 --> 00:20:19,824
‐ When the Pupa reaches maturity,
it'll evolve into its true form.

499
00:20:19,824 --> 00:20:22,660
One that'll destroy and rebuild the planet
in the image of the home world

500
00:20:22,660 --> 00:20:25,205
using data stored in its DNA.
That kind of stuff.

501
00:20:25,205 --> 00:20:27,874
‐ Wow, seems like a pretty important job
to put Pupa‐‐

502
00:20:27,874 --> 00:20:29,042
[both groan]

503
00:20:29,042 --> 00:20:30,919
‐ Gross.
‐ That's sick, Pupa.

504
00:20:30,919 --> 00:20:33,046
Don't eat the gooblers.
Bad Pupa.

505
00:20:33,046 --> 00:20:34,672
[crunching]

506
00:20:34,672 --> 00:20:37,133
Wow, I can't believe we didn't
get in trouble today.

507
00:20:37,133 --> 00:20:39,636
Korvo was pissed.
‐ We never should have kidnapped a kid.

508
00:20:39,636 --> 00:20:41,346
Honestly, I don't know
what I was thinking.

509
00:20:42,013 --> 00:20:46,392
From now on, we only shrink adults.
No one cares when some jerk goes missing.

510
00:20:46,392 --> 00:20:49,896
‐ Good night, Mr. Janitor.
I made you an outfit out of Kleenex.

511
00:20:49,896 --> 00:20:52,106
If it doesn't fit,
just rip it a little bit.

512
00:20:52,482 --> 00:20:54,567
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

513
00:20:54,567 --> 00:20:57,570
♪

514
00:21:39,487 --> 00:21:41,489
♪

515
00:21:44,158 --> 00:21:45,618
[imitating laser fire]