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00:00:01,836 --> 00:00:03,752
-♪ look up there ♪
-♪ what do you see? ♪
2
00:00:03,879 --> 00:00:05,629
♪ nature and stuff ♪
3
00:00:05,715 --> 00:00:06,714
-♪ like a rock ♪
-♪ and a tree ♪
4
00:00:06,841 --> 00:00:09,675
♪ oh, the great north ♪
5
00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:13,178
♪ way up here,
you can breathe the air ♪
6
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♪ catch some fish ♪
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♪ or gaze at a bear ♪
8
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♪ wow ♪
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♪ oh, the great north ♪
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♪ here we live, oh, oh ♪
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♪ here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪
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♪ from longest night
to longest day ♪
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♪ in the great north. ♪
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thanks for the ride home
from the mall, steven.
15
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Sure, any time.
16
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I mean, anytime
you're at the mall.
17
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Because, otherwise, how could
I drive you home from there?
18
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Oh, great point,
and I love... Points.
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Well, that movie was fun.
20
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:48,589
-Yeah.
-So, uh, this is off topic,
21
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but, um, could I kiss you?
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Uh, yeah, big time.
23
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:55,220
♪ ♪
24
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-(judy exclaiming)
-oh, no! Are you okay, judy?
25
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,644
-Uh...
-Do you need some help?
26
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:03,937
No, no, I'm all set.
27
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I just wanted to lie
on the ground
28
00:01:05,483 --> 00:01:07,149
and gather my thoughts
about the evening.
29
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I-- yeah, okay, I guess
I'll, I'll just, I'll just go.
30
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Oh, sounds good.
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So just have a great year.
32
00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:15,657
Or keep in touch, actually,
is what I meant to say.
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-Or stay in school.
-Okay.
34
00:01:17,453 --> 00:01:18,577
Uh, bye?
35
00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:21,872
Judy tootie, fresh and fruity,
how's it dangling?
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That is a very fun
new greeting,
37
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imaginary best friend
alanis morissette.
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I'm just gonna dive
right in here
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00:01:27,171 --> 00:01:28,837
with how it is
actually dangling.
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Is this about the big group
movie date you went on tonight?
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Yes. Did you happen
to see me maybe...
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Fall off the porch when
steven huang tried to kiss you?
43
00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:36,804
And then pretend that you
like laying on the ground?
44
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And then say "stay in school"?
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-So you saw?
-I saw.
46
00:01:39,725 --> 00:01:41,391
It started out so great.
47
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You see, on the group date,
steven and I went in together--
48
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financially--
on a plus-size movie treat.
49
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Does anyone want to share
a jumbo minty mints?
50
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(in slow motion):
I do.
51
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:53,779
(in slow motion):
Oh! (laughing)
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due to our mint-sharing
agreement, steven and I
53
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had to sit next to each other
and the next thing you know,
54
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there were a...
More than usual number
55
00:02:00,579 --> 00:02:02,746
-of fingers in that box.
-Alanis: I'm not sure you know
56
00:02:02,915 --> 00:02:04,039
what you're saying, judy,
but continue.
57
00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:05,332
Plus he wears cologne
58
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:06,458
like a young millionaire,
59
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:07,835
and it makes him smell like...
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00:02:07,962 --> 00:02:09,586
Like if a hamburger went ahead
61
00:02:09,755 --> 00:02:10,754
and just took a bath.
62
00:02:10,923 --> 00:02:12,422
So my senses were...
63
00:02:12,508 --> 00:02:14,091
-Overwhelmed, you get it.
-Overwhelmed, I get it.
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00:02:14,218 --> 00:02:17,052
But then when he went in
for the big k-I-s-s,
65
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I just couldn't do it
because of, because of--
66
00:02:20,391 --> 00:02:22,683
-the incident?
-Yes, the incident.
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Let me paint a picture for you.
68
00:02:24,562 --> 00:02:27,020
-Oh, good, the story again.
-There I was,
69
00:02:27,189 --> 00:02:29,148
standing near my locker
with my seventh grade
70
00:02:29,275 --> 00:02:31,024
boyfriend, anderson guffstafsen.
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00:02:31,152 --> 00:02:33,026
Two sweet, crazy tweens
72
00:02:33,112 --> 00:02:35,687
unaware of the tragedy
that was about to befall them.
73
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:38,323
The hallway cleared,
anderson leaned in for a kiss,
74
00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:41,118
but just then,
a breeze blew through,
75
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and a bunch
of his gorgeous blond hair
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blew right into my mouth.
77
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It was my first kiss--
I didn't know
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what I was feeling and I thought
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00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:49,168
that's what frenching felt like.
80
00:02:49,253 --> 00:02:51,378
I mean, it's France,
so I just kept kissing.
81
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:54,965
And then I realized his hair
was lodged in my braces.
82
00:02:55,092 --> 00:02:56,967
And when I say "lodged," I mean
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"lodged"-- we had to walk to
the nurse's office like that!
84
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:02,389
It was the longest walk
of my life.
85
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Teachers let kids come out
of the classrooms to gawk.
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The school nurse had
to cut anderson's beautiful
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00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:09,479
locks out of my mouth.
88
00:03:09,565 --> 00:03:11,899
And then the dentist
had to temporarily
89
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:15,152
remove my braces to get
the rest of the hair out!
90
00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:17,321
Sure, I got two prizes
when it was all over.
91
00:03:17,406 --> 00:03:19,156
A bouncy ball
and a plastic spider ring
92
00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:21,074
that would also get caught
in my braces months later.
93
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:22,576
But anderson and I both decided
94
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:25,495
that it was best to go
our separate ways
95
00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:27,080
and I haven't been able
to kiss anyone since.
96
00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:29,082
-Huh.
-What do you mean, "huh"?
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00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:31,627
Well, I know
that story's why you say
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00:03:31,712 --> 00:03:33,045
you haven't kissed anyone since,
99
00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:34,630
but don't you think that
maybe your tendency
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00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:37,966
to avoid relationships
is, I don't know, genetic?
101
00:03:38,052 --> 00:03:39,218
-What?!
-I'm just saying your dad
102
00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:41,011
has dated anyone
since your mom left.
103
00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:44,223
Well, yeah, but that was pretty
recently very many years ago.
104
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And for a long time,
he pretended she was dead
105
00:03:46,602 --> 00:03:47,768
so he wouldn't have
to get back out there.
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Well, he stopped doing that now.
107
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:52,356
And how many dates has he been
on since he stopped pretending?
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Mm, well,
that would be zero, alanis,
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and I feel like you knew that
and that was a gotcha question.
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See, he let one bad experience
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prevent him from ever trying
to find love again.
112
00:04:01,158 --> 00:04:02,491
And now here you are
doing pretty much
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00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:04,618
-the same thing, right?
-Uh, well...
114
00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:06,870
I mean, not kissing anyone
sounds like a great way
115
00:04:06,956 --> 00:04:08,497
to never get hurt
and then die alone
116
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clutching a photograph
of someone you never kissed.
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Oh, god, I don't want dad
to die alone like that!
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I was talking
more about you, but...
119
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No, you're right.
I got to get going
120
00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:19,216
-on fixing my dad right away.
-Okay.
121
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Dumb alanis,
my dad isn't gonna die alone.
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My dad's gonna die accompanied.
Oh, hey, moon.
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00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:25,722
-Hey, judy.
-Uh, what are you doing?
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I'm capturing
a flightless ruffed grouse
125
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to teach it how to fly and then
re-release it into the wild.
126
00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:31,979
-What are you doing?
-Storming over to wolf's
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00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:33,272
to talk to him
about dad's love life.
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-Good luck.
-And to you, my friend.
129
00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:39,403
Uh-oh, looks like somebody
130
00:04:39,488 --> 00:04:40,946
-wants in on fonzarella night.
-What?
131
00:04:41,031 --> 00:04:42,739
Oh, fonzarella night, yeah.
132
00:04:42,825 --> 00:04:44,491
We watch a henry winkler movie
and make mozzarella sticks.
133
00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:46,201
Tonight it's
you don't mess with the zohan.
134
00:04:46,328 --> 00:04:48,245
He plays "uncredited
limousine passenger,"
135
00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:51,123
but he still steals the movie
out from under sandler, imho.
136
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,834
Wolf, I need to talk
to you urgently about dad.
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00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:55,836
You had me at dad.
138
00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:57,587
Everyone, this is timothy.
139
00:04:57,715 --> 00:05:00,007
Please note that he is
not a pet or food.
140
00:05:00,134 --> 00:05:01,717
I'm teaching him to fly.
141
00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:02,884
Oh, maybe I can help you.
142
00:05:03,012 --> 00:05:04,177
I also cannot fly,
143
00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:05,804
so I totally get
what he's going through.
144
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:08,307
No offense, moon, personally,
I don't care for birds.
145
00:05:08,392 --> 00:05:09,725
I always catch them
peaking in my windows.
146
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:12,019
Stop peaking, birds.
This isn't for you.
147
00:05:12,104 --> 00:05:13,353
Yeah, it's for her, birds.
148
00:05:13,439 --> 00:05:15,022
A woman's body is
her own dominion.
149
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:17,065
Eyes to yourself, timothy.
Don't look at my dominion.
150
00:05:17,151 --> 00:05:18,692
Okay, so family meeting.
151
00:05:18,861 --> 00:05:22,029
Little dawn download requested
by our only sister judy.
152
00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:24,156
Juderonomous, you've the floor.
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00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:25,824
(clears throat)
it has come to my attention
154
00:05:25,909 --> 00:05:28,577
via a friend of mine who
definitely exists here on earth
155
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:31,371
and is a real person that
dad has not been on any dates
156
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,081
since admitting
that mom left him.
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00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:34,666
And he is at serious risk
of dying alone,
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00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:37,336
clutching a women
he carved out of a tree stump.
159
00:05:37,463 --> 00:05:39,421
-Aren't we all?
-So I was thinking we should
160
00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:41,548
give him a little push
just to, you know,
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-get him back out there.
-And I realize that there's
162
00:05:43,594 --> 00:05:45,344
a "meet and meat" singles mixer
tomorrow night
163
00:05:45,471 --> 00:05:47,179
at the russian bar
that'd be perfect
164
00:05:47,306 --> 00:05:48,680
for meeting
some lone moose ladies.
165
00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:50,223
Now, why is it called
a "meet and meat"?
166
00:05:50,309 --> 00:05:51,475
Oh, because they also raffle off
167
00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:53,310
a bunch of meat
from local hunters.
168
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,561
I used to go to it sometimes
169
00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:56,021
when I was an eligible
bachelor.
170
00:05:56,190 --> 00:05:57,814
Never met anyone,
but one time I won
171
00:05:57,941 --> 00:05:59,441
14 caribou steaks.
172
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:01,693
Lost 'em on the way home,
but what a thrill.
173
00:06:01,779 --> 00:06:03,779
I printed out a flier for it
from their website
174
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:04,946
using our old printer.
175
00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:06,239
It only took 45 minutes,
176
00:06:06,325 --> 00:06:07,532
and you can read
two-thirds of it.
177
00:06:07,618 --> 00:06:09,618
-Dope.
-Oh, boy, dad's gonna hate this.
178
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:10,952
Don't you think we should
just let him
179
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:12,537
meet someone on his own?
180
00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:14,498
Like when harry met, you know,
what's it called?
181
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:17,751
-Sally.
-No, the hendersons,
and they all fell in love.
182
00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:20,170
Guys, I think we ought
to support judy here,
183
00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:22,089
and by doing that, support dad.
184
00:06:22,216 --> 00:06:23,382
We should go, too.
I'm taken,
185
00:06:23,509 --> 00:06:24,841
but I'd love to win some bacon.
186
00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:26,468
You got it, my sausage sweetie.
187
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,553
Great idea. We can all go.
And as a bargaining chip,
188
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,306
wolf and I thought we could
promise dad, in exchange,
189
00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:34,309
-the one thing
he's always wanted.
-You don't mean...
190
00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:35,727
Yeah, I do mean.
I'm talking about
191
00:06:35,813 --> 00:06:37,896
the whole family taking
the chain saw basics
192
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:41,024
workshop series being offered
at the public library.
193
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:42,859
-(ham groans)
-hear us out.
194
00:06:42,945 --> 00:06:45,070
Guys, it's only four saturdays.
Eight hours each day.
195
00:06:45,197 --> 00:06:47,072
Well, we've avoided it
for years,
196
00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:48,865
but if that's what it takes
to stop dad from dying alone,
197
00:06:48,951 --> 00:06:52,285
-then stick a fork in me,
'cause I'm a chain saw.
-Great.
198
00:06:52,413 --> 00:06:54,121
Oh, god, here he comes.
Everyone act casual.
199
00:06:54,206 --> 00:06:56,498
What's going on?
Is it the apocalypse?
200
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,917
No one panic, we have
500 years' worth of rice,
201
00:06:59,002 --> 00:07:00,752
and two calvin and hobbes books
in the basement.
202
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:04,047
No, it's even better than that,
if you can believe it.
203
00:07:04,133 --> 00:07:05,507
(sings fanfare)
204
00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:07,342
dad, it's time for you
to get back on the horse
205
00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:09,719
and ride that horse to the barn
and meet women
206
00:07:09,888 --> 00:07:13,265
at the meet and meat singles
mixer this weekend.
207
00:07:13,392 --> 00:07:15,475
Oh, I didn't tell you guys?
208
00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:19,187
I'm actually off to hawaii
for a work trip.
209
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:20,480
-You get it, you get it.
-Uh-oh, code dad.
210
00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:22,524
-Grab him, quick!
-He's on the move!
211
00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:28,113
Children, sorry that I tried
to run away, and you were forced
212
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,240
to wrestle me to the ground
and then sit on me
213
00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:33,243
for 15 minutes while I fought
you like a wild bear.
214
00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:34,953
(chuckles)
it's no problem, dad.
215
00:07:35,038 --> 00:07:38,123
We'll wrestle you to the ground
any day, and I mean that.
216
00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:40,167
So, if I go tomorrow
and attempt to,
217
00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:42,377
as the teens say, "meet people,"
218
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:45,297
you will really all
seriously attend
219
00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:47,424
the chain saw basics
workshop with me?
220
00:07:47,551 --> 00:07:49,843
Yep. That's what we said,
and that's what we meant.
221
00:07:49,928 --> 00:07:51,219
You have my word.
222
00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:53,221
You can also have this word:
Pineapple.
223
00:07:53,307 --> 00:07:55,223
I've asked you to do that
so many times.
224
00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:57,184
It's literally all
I've ever wanted.
225
00:07:57,269 --> 00:07:59,144
And now it's all we've
ever wanted.
226
00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:01,521
32 hours with our family
and our chain saws.
227
00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:04,191
Well, then,
the meet and meat it is.
228
00:08:04,318 --> 00:08:06,526
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm going to go throw up
229
00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:08,653
about this very fun
dating opportunity
230
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,530
before heading out
to work on the boat.
231
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,991
Guys, we did it--
dad will no longer die alone.
232
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,410
But instead he will die
in the arms of a woman.
233
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:16,870
Identity tbd.
234
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,246
Okay, great job, everybody.
235
00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:19,998
Time for school.
Let's head out.
236
00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:21,583
Have fun at school, guys.
237
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,335
I've got to stay home
and teach timothy to fly.
238
00:08:23,462 --> 00:08:26,004
Uh-uh. No way, bub.
You're going to school.
239
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:27,130
Me and honeybee will watch tim.
240
00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:28,548
I'll show him top gun.
241
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,592
If anyone can teach him to fly,
it's maverick.
242
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:32,302
Fine. But fast-forward
through the part
243
00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:34,721
where goose dies, please.
244
00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,598
You know, judes, I was thinking
we might need to help dad
245
00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:38,642
brush up on his skills
before tomorrow.
246
00:08:38,727 --> 00:08:40,602
The meet and meat is no joke.
There's, uh...
247
00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:42,646
How do I say this?
A lot of pool cues,
248
00:08:42,731 --> 00:08:44,189
not a lot of pockets,
if you know what I mean.
249
00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:46,024
-No. What do you mean?
-A lot of hot dogs,
250
00:08:46,109 --> 00:08:47,442
-not a lot of buns.
-Huh?
251
00:08:47,528 --> 00:08:49,152
What he's saying is
there'll be tons of, uh,
252
00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:51,029
washington monuments,
not a lot of grand canyons.
253
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,198
-Do we need to spell
this out for you?
-Maybe.
254
00:08:53,325 --> 00:08:55,492
A lot of letters,
not a lot of envelopes.
255
00:08:55,577 --> 00:08:58,078
A lot of prairie dogs,
not a lot of prairie dog holes.
256
00:08:58,247 --> 00:09:00,205
A lot of feet,
not a lot of socks.
257
00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:02,415
-Ham gets it.
-Tons of dvds,
258
00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,876
not a ton of dvd shelves
to put 'em on?
259
00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:07,128
Oh, uh, kinda. Yeah.
Good try, moon.
260
00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:08,588
A lot of andre the giants,
261
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,341
not a lot of gigantic
sleeping bags.
262
00:09:11,426 --> 00:09:13,093
Uh, what are you guys
talking about?!
263
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,669
A lot of men, very few women.
264
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:17,138
Oh... Okay, then, yeah.
265
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:18,765
After school, we should help dad
practice dating.
266
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,850
And who better to practice on
than your own kids?
267
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:25,105
Exactly. No one knows dad's
romantic needs better than us.
268
00:09:25,857 --> 00:09:28,608
-Judy, hi.
-Judy: The longest walk
of my life.
269
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,861
(screams): Oh, hi, hair.
I mean hi there, steven.
270
00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,656
(laughs):
I didn't know you'd be here
in my mouth.
271
00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:36,533
No, I mean here, near my locker.
272
00:09:36,660 --> 00:09:39,286
-(laughs nervously)
-yep, here I am.
273
00:09:39,413 --> 00:09:40,662
I was wondering if
maybe this weekend
274
00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:42,414
you wanted to, uh, hang out.
275
00:09:42,541 --> 00:09:45,542
Oh, huh, I wish, because, um,
on weekends I travel
276
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:46,793
as a flight attendant.
277
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:49,421
So I'll be in frankfurt,
germany.
278
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:52,591
Okay, uh, well,
maybe during the week, then?
279
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:54,050
I mean, I had a lot of fun
with you,
280
00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:55,302
and I think you're really great.
281
00:09:55,429 --> 00:09:57,137
I think you're great, too.
282
00:09:57,222 --> 00:10:00,515
Okay, now I have to go stand
over there because I-- wow!
283
00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:02,017
You know what,
I just farted, actually,
284
00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:03,310
and I'm allergic
to my own farts,
285
00:10:03,437 --> 00:10:04,519
so I've got to keep on moving.
286
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:06,021
No, don't follow me, please.
287
00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:07,606
It's not safe, um,
'cause I'm still farting,
288
00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,107
so you don't want to enter
the blast zone, okay.
289
00:10:09,234 --> 00:10:11,109
Whoo-hoo, melt your face off.
290
00:10:11,236 --> 00:10:12,444
Wow, ew, gross. Bye-bye.
291
00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:14,487
-Bye-bye. Stay there.
-B-bye.
292
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:16,990
Okay, ready?
Toss him back.
293
00:10:17,159 --> 00:10:18,408
-Let's go again.
-Hey, guys.
294
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,701
Do you maybe want
to take a break
295
00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:21,036
from teaching timothy to fly
296
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,621
so that we can teach dad
to date?
297
00:10:22,706 --> 00:10:25,498
No can do, judy, he's pretty
motivated right now.
298
00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:28,543
Actually, he fell asleep.
(gasps) or died?
299
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:29,961
Nah, he's sleeping.
300
00:10:30,047 --> 00:10:31,588
Let's get started.
Dad, it's been a while
301
00:10:31,715 --> 00:10:33,757
since your last date,
so this is just practice
302
00:10:33,842 --> 00:10:36,384
to help you with your
conversation skills.
303
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:38,136
Sorry I said "skills" like that.
304
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:39,846
In my mind it was gonna be cool.
305
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,598
Judy, I loved it.
306
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:43,391
So, dad, why don't you go ahead
and take a seat there
307
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:45,393
-across from wolf--
he'll be your date.
-Charmed.
308
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:46,603
I'll be your waitress.
309
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,688
And everyone else
will judge you.
310
00:10:48,857 --> 00:10:50,023
-Sound good?
-Not really.
311
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:51,149
And... Action.
312
00:10:51,276 --> 00:10:52,859
Now, uh, dad, just relax
313
00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:54,527
and pretend
I'm a wonderful lady.
314
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:57,238
(feminine voice):
So, beef, what do you do?
315
00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:58,948
I kill fish for money.
316
00:10:59,076 --> 00:11:01,326
My, my, my!
317
00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:02,786
Okay, uh-uh, this is not good.
318
00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:04,746
Listen, not to brag,
but before I met wolf,
319
00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:06,373
I went on a lot of dates.
320
00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:07,707
(normal voice):
Course you did, my swipe queen.
321
00:11:07,793 --> 00:11:09,334
Heart eyes emoji big-time.
322
00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:11,419
And honestly, beef,
if you want to be a good date,
323
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,130
there are really only
three rules to remember.
324
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:16,257
One, ask her questions
about herself.
325
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,926
Two, listen to her answers.
326
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:19,552
Three, don't ask for any
of my cheesy garlic knots
327
00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:21,388
with two different
dipping sauces.
328
00:11:21,473 --> 00:11:23,264
If you want that,
order it yourself.
329
00:11:23,392 --> 00:11:25,016
I always order my own sauces.
330
00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:26,393
I'm not a sociopath.
331
00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:28,395
Great. Now let's try
this date again.
332
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:29,479
So...
333
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:30,897
(feminine voice):
So...
334
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:32,399
(whispers):
Ask her questions.
335
00:11:32,526 --> 00:11:35,777
Um, okay.
What kind of fish do you like?
336
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,487
I love trout.
337
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,698
-What kind of fish do you hate?
-No more fish talk, beef.
338
00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:40,990
If you were a fish,
339
00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:42,909
-what kind of fish would you be?
-No.
340
00:11:42,994 --> 00:11:44,369
-What kind of fish
wouldn't you...? Damn it!
-No.
341
00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:47,747
How about we get some drinks
and loosen up?
342
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:49,290
I'll take a fish shake.
343
00:11:49,418 --> 00:11:50,750
-Dad, no!
-Nope.
344
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:54,713
I'm trying.
Do you have a driver's license?
345
00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:55,755
-Yes.
-Me, too.
346
00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:57,465
Okay, that's better, I guess.
347
00:11:57,592 --> 00:11:59,801
Just a few more hours
of practice,
348
00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:02,011
maybe, like, 12 more hours,
and tomorrow we'll be kissing
349
00:12:02,139 --> 00:12:03,930
and dating like
you wouldn't believe.
350
00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:06,349
Hey, guys, next time I'd like
to play one of the dates.
351
00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:08,351
Cheryl.
She's a business associate
352
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:10,395
who knows what she wants.
353
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,771
Or does she?
354
00:12:11,857 --> 00:12:14,149
Okay, we are about
to send dad in there
355
00:12:14,276 --> 00:12:16,025
to hopefully make some sort
of romantic connection
356
00:12:16,153 --> 00:12:17,610
which is
incredibly important for him
357
00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:20,029
and not so much for me
because I am very confident
358
00:12:20,157 --> 00:12:21,322
about dating and kissing.
359
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,657
-Congratulations.
-Thank you.
360
00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:24,534
Now, dad,
if you feel like running,
361
00:12:24,619 --> 00:12:27,036
just picture us all
at the library carving out
362
00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:29,122
some quality time
to learn about chain saws.
363
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:30,206
And each other.
364
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:31,875
But in case you do run...
365
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,002
I'll be sitting near the
front door to block that exit,
366
00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,795
wolf and honeybee,
you stick close by him
367
00:12:35,881 --> 00:12:37,297
and keep him from talking
about fish.
368
00:12:37,382 --> 00:12:38,631
Moon and ham,
you go around the back
369
00:12:38,759 --> 00:12:40,717
in case he tries
to escape that way.
370
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:42,218
And don't get distracted
by teaching timothy to fly.
371
00:12:42,304 --> 00:12:43,595
We won't.
372
00:12:43,722 --> 00:12:44,804
Do you know that you
just winked at me?
373
00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:46,139
-I do.
-Okay.
374
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,682
If I die in there,
375
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:48,933
there's a box in my closet
376
00:12:49,060 --> 00:12:50,727
labeled
"poems for andie macdowell"
377
00:12:50,854 --> 00:12:54,314
that I'd prefer
you threw out without opening.
378
00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,027
Honeybee:
Ooh, look at all those meats
we could win!
379
00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:01,279
It's like the zoo.
But they're all dead.
380
00:13:01,364 --> 00:13:02,614
It's roasting in here.
381
00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,616
The thermostat says
52 degrees, dad.
382
00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:06,659
Well, it feels like
I'm in cabo st. Lucas.
383
00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:08,244
Okay, well, I'm just gonna
go sit over there
384
00:13:08,330 --> 00:13:09,579
with my little poem pad
385
00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:11,289
and guard the door.
Go get 'em, dad.
386
00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:13,249
Oof. Are there even
any women here?
387
00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:14,918
Sure, sure. Oh, uh, look.
388
00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:16,544
There's vera.
389
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:17,921
And there's that lady there,
who I've never seen.
390
00:13:18,089 --> 00:13:20,507
♪ you can keep me warm... ♪
391
00:13:21,218 --> 00:13:25,094
hark, a siren pulls me
onto yonder rocks.
392
00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:30,683
Looks like someone buttered
your dad's roll.
393
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:31,976
Go on and get her, beefcheeks.
394
00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:33,311
Oh, please, a woman like that
395
00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:35,104
has her pick of the pumpkins.
396
00:13:35,232 --> 00:13:36,564
Be confident.
397
00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:38,399
If you weren't my dad,
I'd be so into you.
398
00:13:38,527 --> 00:13:41,152
-Um...
-You just need a little
dutch courage, pops.
399
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:42,821
Yeah, beef, you hit the bar
400
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,531
while we go get
some raffle tickets.
401
00:13:44,616 --> 00:13:46,157
I'll take a cup with ice,
402
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:48,034
and then a lot of alcohol
poured all over the ice.
403
00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:49,786
And your largest
appetizer sampler.
404
00:13:49,871 --> 00:13:53,122
Nothing sets a romantic mood
like the smell of warm cheese.
405
00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:54,999
(groans)
he's supposed to be mingling.
406
00:13:55,126 --> 00:13:56,876
-Mingling and singling.
-Hi, judy.
407
00:13:57,003 --> 00:13:58,753
Judy:
I mean "lodged."
408
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:00,380
(yelps)
oh. Hey, steven.
409
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:01,422
There you are again.
410
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:02,590
Which I am open to, of course,
411
00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:03,883
because... I'm normal.
412
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:05,343
Wait. What are you doing here?
413
00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:06,970
My mom's
the cocktail server here,
414
00:14:07,097 --> 00:14:08,763
so this is kind of like
my second home.
415
00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:09,889
Can I buy you a soda?
416
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:12,684
Oh! My... Accountant is here...
417
00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,143
Outside with my--
418
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:17,021
he has my taxes,
which are due... Tonight.
419
00:14:17,107 --> 00:14:18,648
So... (laughs) with regret...
420
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:22,277
I must walk away
from you to go to see him.
421
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:23,862
Okay.
422
00:14:23,989 --> 00:14:26,322
If you're wondering
if any of the meats are haunted,
423
00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:28,032
it's just the reindeer sausages.
424
00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:30,285
But is friendly ghost.
Likes to watch me toilet.
425
00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:32,495
Look at that! He's going in.
426
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:35,206
Yeah, dad! Hit on
that woman! Respectfully!
427
00:14:35,333 --> 00:14:37,667
Excuse me, miss, but I seem
to have ordered myself
428
00:14:37,752 --> 00:14:40,128
a slightly too large
appetizer platter.
429
00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:41,796
Would you have any interest
in sharing?
430
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:43,590
Yeah, if you think
there's enough for two.
431
00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:45,133
Hot damn.
432
00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:47,760
-Name's dell.
-Beef.
433
00:14:47,888 --> 00:14:49,846
So... Do... You...
434
00:14:49,973 --> 00:14:51,639
-Fish?
-I do fish!
435
00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:52,640
You do?
436
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:53,892
Well, I used to.
437
00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:54,767
I'm just getting back into it.
438
00:14:54,853 --> 00:14:56,394
I hadn't been out much
439
00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:58,313
since my husband jasper died
while we were fishing.
440
00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,898
There's nothing
quite like watching a dock line
441
00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:02,025
wrap around your husband's neck,
pull him into the water,
442
00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:03,860
and then pop his head clean off
right in front of you
443
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:05,987
-to put you off fishing
for a spell.
-That makes sense.
444
00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:08,656
Yeah, took me a while
to find the damn thing, too.
445
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:10,283
His head, that is.
446
00:15:10,368 --> 00:15:11,826
I put his favorite hat on him
447
00:15:11,912 --> 00:15:13,328
after they stitched
his head back to his neck.
448
00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:14,662
Didn't have to brush his hair,
at least.
449
00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:16,664
He hated getting
his hair brushed.
450
00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:17,832
He said it was too fancy.
451
00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:18,958
Well, he wasn't wrong.
452
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:20,919
Listen, I know we just met,
453
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,004
and this is gonna sound wild,
but...
454
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:25,423
Do you want to go outside
and get some air?
455
00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:27,592
I sure do.
It's roasting in here.
456
00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,845
For our next meat bundle,
we have a side of elk.
457
00:15:30,931 --> 00:15:33,389
And our winner is...
Honeybee shaw!
458
00:15:33,475 --> 00:15:34,891
Yay!
459
00:15:34,976 --> 00:15:36,643
Let's put this on our bed
and roll around on it.
460
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:39,562
Uh, hey, judy, what you doing
in the trash there?
461
00:15:39,648 --> 00:15:40,855
Oh, well, steven's here,
462
00:15:41,024 --> 00:15:42,815
and so I'm picking out
a gift for him.
463
00:15:42,901 --> 00:15:44,400
-In the dumpster?
-Uh...
464
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:46,861
-Wait, is that your...?
-Dad.
465
00:15:46,947 --> 00:15:47,862
-And he's with a...
-Woman?
466
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,781
Wow. I knew he could do it.
467
00:15:49,908 --> 00:15:51,282
Looks like they're hopping on
468
00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:53,242
the choo-choo train
to smooch city.
469
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:55,119
Next stop: Kissachusetts.
470
00:15:55,205 --> 00:15:57,455
So tell me
about this plan again?
471
00:15:57,624 --> 00:16:00,917
I'm gonna leap off a branch
and show timothy how to fly.
472
00:16:01,086 --> 00:16:04,170
Yeah, but you can't fly, so...
473
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:06,881
Mmm. I can kind of soar.
He'll see what I'm getting at.
474
00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,800
Beef:
What an excellent view.
475
00:16:08,927 --> 00:16:10,385
Dell:
Yeah, the ocean is
476
00:16:10,512 --> 00:16:12,095
both breathtakingly beautiful
477
00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:13,554
and the foundation
of our local economy.
478
00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,723
This is so romantic.
479
00:16:15,850 --> 00:16:17,100
So, I was thinking.
480
00:16:17,227 --> 00:16:19,644
Maybe sometime,
only if you wanted to,
481
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:22,814
uh, maybe we could do
a thing... Together.
482
00:16:22,941 --> 00:16:24,857
Like a-a film... Or chores.
483
00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:25,858
You mean like a date?
484
00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:28,319
No, no, no. Well... Yes.
485
00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:30,363
Like a date.
Exactly like a date.
486
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,490
Oh, my god.
487
00:16:32,617 --> 00:16:34,617
♪ well, I'm singing a song ♪
488
00:16:34,744 --> 00:16:36,995
♪ about how alanis was wrong ♪
489
00:16:37,122 --> 00:16:39,414
♪ me and my dad are gonna date ♪
490
00:16:39,541 --> 00:16:42,208
♪ but not each other,
that sounded weird ♪
491
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:45,169
♪ we're gonna date
separate people ♪
492
00:16:45,255 --> 00:16:47,630
♪ my dad's gonna date
this lady right here ♪
493
00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:49,757
-♪ 'cause she's gonna say ♪
-hmm.
494
00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:52,301
-♪ I said she's gonna say... ♪
-no.
495
00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:53,344
(gasps)
496
00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:54,512
moon:
Aah!
497
00:16:54,639 --> 00:16:56,889
Did he see me?
Is he flying?
498
00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:58,474
Oh. This is the part of top gun
499
00:16:58,601 --> 00:17:00,977
you weren't supposed
to see, timothy.
500
00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,190
Well, this night was a disaster.
501
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:07,900
That rejection
was pretty brutal.
502
00:17:07,986 --> 00:17:09,235
What exactly did she say to dad?
503
00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:10,820
-"no."
-yikes.
504
00:17:10,989 --> 00:17:12,655
-Yeah.
-Beef: Good news.
It's just a sprain.
505
00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:14,949
I asked them if they could
rearrange my arm bones
506
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:16,534
into wings, but they said no.
507
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:19,495
(groans) that's insane.
Did they say why?
508
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:21,622
Judy:
Who's that on the porch?
509
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:23,041
An intruder? Is it go time?
510
00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:24,876
I believe that intruder
511
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,420
is dell, the leathery angel
I met this evening.
512
00:17:27,589 --> 00:17:29,088
(groans)
I can't believe it.
513
00:17:29,257 --> 00:17:31,090
First she rejects you,
now she's here to rob us?
514
00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:33,384
Guys, I don't think
she's here to rob us.
515
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,836
She's probably here to say
she made a terrible mistake
516
00:17:35,889 --> 00:17:37,096
and that dad's the greatest
517
00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:38,222
and of course
she'll go out with him.
518
00:17:38,349 --> 00:17:39,766
Okay, but if she does rob us,
519
00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:40,808
she's not getting this meat.
520
00:17:40,935 --> 00:17:41,809
I would die for this meat.
521
00:17:41,895 --> 00:17:43,019
Hello there, beef.
522
00:17:43,188 --> 00:17:44,771
I wondered
if I could have a word.
523
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:46,105
Of course.
524
00:17:46,191 --> 00:17:47,565
Uh, everyone,
why don't you head in
525
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,192
and give me and dad
and dell some privacy.
526
00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:51,194
-Judy...
-Okay, but if you need me,
527
00:17:51,321 --> 00:17:53,362
I'll just be listening
at the door.
528
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,531
About that invitation
to go on a date...
529
00:17:55,658 --> 00:17:57,116
-(gasps)
-judy.
530
00:17:57,202 --> 00:17:58,201
-Sorry!
-Ham: I'm here, too.
531
00:17:58,286 --> 00:17:59,827
Okay.
532
00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:01,287
Wolf: Uh, we are also here,
dad, full disclosure.
533
00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:02,872
Me and honeybee and moon.
534
00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:04,123
Got it. Thank you.
535
00:18:04,292 --> 00:18:05,666
Wolf:
You are welcome, big guy.
536
00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:07,085
You were saying?
537
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,419
Well, I didn't get a chance
to give you
538
00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:10,171
a full answer
at the raffle tonight.
539
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,589
Wolf:
Could you speak up
just a touch more, dell?
540
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:13,257
I'm having a little
trouble hearing you.
541
00:18:13,343 --> 00:18:14,801
Oh, okay.
542
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:16,385
-(louder): How-how's this?
-That's better, thanks!
543
00:18:16,554 --> 00:18:19,055
I, uh, really didn't go
to the meat and meet
544
00:18:19,182 --> 00:18:20,723
to meet anyone.
545
00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,141
Romantically, that is.
546
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,936
Thing is, jasper was not
the first of my husbands
547
00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,938
-to succumb to a terrible fate.
-I see.
548
00:18:27,065 --> 00:18:28,940
My first love, donovan,
froze to death.
549
00:18:29,109 --> 00:18:30,900
In our freezer.
He wasn't very bright.
550
00:18:30,985 --> 00:18:32,485
The next two fell in holes.
551
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:34,487
And richard was in a plane
crash, which he survived,
552
00:18:34,656 --> 00:18:36,239
but then his friend kevin
ate him.
553
00:18:36,324 --> 00:18:37,073
Good lord.
554
00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:38,825
Yeah. So you can see how
555
00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:40,451
I've begun to think of myself
as something of a curse.
556
00:18:40,578 --> 00:18:42,537
And you seem like a good guy
who does not deserve
557
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,705
to suffer a gruesome death
because you went out with me.
558
00:18:44,833 --> 00:18:45,832
Wolf:
A-greed!
559
00:18:45,917 --> 00:18:47,208
-Wolf.
-Love you, dad.
560
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:48,709
So, if you're out
of the dating game,
561
00:18:48,837 --> 00:18:50,294
why were you at a singles mixer?
562
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,088
I figured
I might do some networking,
563
00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:54,465
maybe meet someone
who had a boat, find a job.
564
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:55,800
Well, I have a boat.
565
00:18:55,885 --> 00:18:57,635
And I might be able
to use some help
566
00:18:57,762 --> 00:18:59,554
on tuesdays and thursdays when
my daughter works at the mall.
567
00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:02,390
I'm afraid the red hot flames
of our instant attraction
568
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:05,434
might make concentrating
on the fish a little difficult.
569
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:06,727
Understood.
570
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,020
But maybe after
a cooling-off period,
571
00:19:08,148 --> 00:19:10,022
you could ask me again.
572
00:19:10,150 --> 00:19:12,400
About the date or the job?
573
00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:13,526
Both.
574
00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:14,861
This might be crazy,
575
00:19:14,988 --> 00:19:16,487
but I think I'm team dell.
576
00:19:17,448 --> 00:19:19,699
Hey, dad.
I just wanted to say sorry.
577
00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:21,075
For what?
578
00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:22,160
I... I wanted you
to find love again,
579
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:23,536
but you wound up getting hurt.
580
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:26,831
Maybe it is better
just to... Not do stuff.
581
00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:28,875
Even though I was rejected,
582
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:30,126
I-it was good to try again.
583
00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:31,752
-You were right.
-Oh, good.
584
00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:34,714
So, then...
So, then, you're good.
585
00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:36,007
Good.
586
00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:37,550
What's really bothering you,
judes?
587
00:19:37,635 --> 00:19:39,969
Do you think there's
something in our nature--
588
00:19:40,054 --> 00:19:41,554
I mean me and you--
589
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,639
that makes us not want
to put ourselves out there...
590
00:19:43,725 --> 00:19:45,224
Like, for love?
591
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:46,893
Like, we get a little hair
in our mouth one time
592
00:19:46,978 --> 00:19:48,269
and then we're afraid
593
00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:49,520
that we're always gonna
get hair in our mouth.
594
00:19:49,606 --> 00:19:50,980
You know what I mean?
595
00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,440
Do you think there's
something wrong with us?
596
00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:53,566
Wrong with us?
597
00:19:53,651 --> 00:19:54,901
Nah. We're great.
598
00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:57,028
We're just also picky.
And sensitive.
599
00:19:57,155 --> 00:19:58,529
(laughs)
and a little dramatic.
600
00:19:58,656 --> 00:20:01,365
And maybe watching me
get hurt by your mom
601
00:20:01,492 --> 00:20:03,868
made you a little nervous
about relationships.
602
00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:06,204
I mean, the year that you got
all that hair in your teeth
603
00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:08,706
-was the year that she...
-Left.
604
00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:10,208
Huh. I guess it was.
605
00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:12,877
So maybe we both just got
a little gun-shy.
606
00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:14,253
And it's not surprising
607
00:20:14,380 --> 00:20:16,339
that sometimes
we need a little push.
608
00:20:16,424 --> 00:20:18,925
Also, to be honest,
it was a lot of hair, judy.
609
00:20:19,052 --> 00:20:20,343
Like, a lot.
610
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:22,887
Dad, I think
I need a little push.
611
00:20:23,014 --> 00:20:24,347
Okay.
612
00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:25,473
Can you snow machine me
back to that bar?
613
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:27,183
-Right now?
-Right now.
614
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:28,809
Sure.
Why wouldn't I snow machine
615
00:20:28,937 --> 00:20:30,019
my 16-year-old daughter
616
00:20:30,188 --> 00:20:32,521
to a bar at 11:00 at night?
617
00:20:34,943 --> 00:20:36,651
Dad, avert your eyes.
618
00:20:36,819 --> 00:20:38,069
Hey, look. A truck.
619
00:20:38,196 --> 00:20:39,695
Oh. Hey, judy.
620
00:20:39,822 --> 00:20:41,739
Oh, hello, steven.
621
00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:43,574
Um, the thing is, I didn't kiss
you on the porch the other night
622
00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:46,118
because I was afraid that your
hair would end up in my mouth.
623
00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:47,286
And it is a long story.
624
00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:49,121
But I do still want to kiss you
625
00:20:49,290 --> 00:20:51,249
if you still want to kiss me.
626
00:20:51,376 --> 00:20:53,668
I mean, warn me
if the farts are starting again,
627
00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:55,294
but yes.
628
00:20:57,590 --> 00:20:59,548
♪ ♪
629
00:21:01,135 --> 00:21:03,469
♪ all my girls know
how this one goes ♪
630
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,846
♪ so many birds
lookin' in your windows ♪
631
00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:08,224
♪ don't give it away
to a gull or pigeon ♪
632
00:21:08,351 --> 00:21:10,518
♪ your body is
your own dominion ♪
633
00:21:10,687 --> 00:21:12,561
♪ don't let a grouse
peek in your blouse ♪
634
00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:14,772
♪ don't let a peacock
down your knee socks ♪
635
00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:17,650
♪ don't let a seagull
look at your keyhole ♪
636
00:21:17,735 --> 00:21:20,152
♪ I've met a lot of birds
and they're all b-holes ♪
637
00:21:20,321 --> 00:21:22,280
♪ eyes to yourself, timothy ♪
638
00:21:22,365 --> 00:21:24,573
♪ keep your rooster crest
out of my vest ♪
639
00:21:24,701 --> 00:21:27,118
♪ I'm closing my blinds,
go back to your nest. ♪
640
00:21:27,245 --> 00:21:28,119
captioning sponsored by
bento box entertainment
641
00:21:28,204 --> 00:21:29,996
and toyota.
642
00:21:30,081 --> 00:21:32,623
Captioned by
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