1 00:00:01,577 --> 00:00:04,319 -♪ Look up there ♪ -♪ What do you see? ♪ 2 00:00:04,413 --> 00:00:05,912 ♪ Nature and stuff ♪ 3 00:00:06,065 --> 00:00:07,172 -♪ Like a rock ♪ -♪ And a tree ♪ 4 00:00:07,399 --> 00:00:10,009 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 5 00:00:10,236 --> 00:00:13,737 ♪ Way up here, you can breathe the air ♪ 6 00:00:13,830 --> 00:00:14,905 ♪ Catch some fish ♪ 7 00:00:14,998 --> 00:00:16,573 ♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪ 8 00:00:16,592 --> 00:00:17,665 ♪ Wow ♪ 9 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:21,169 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 10 00:00:21,263 --> 00:00:22,354 ♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪ 11 00:00:22,506 --> 00:00:24,023 ♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪ 12 00:00:24,174 --> 00:00:25,599 ♪ From longest night to longest day ♪ 13 00:00:25,768 --> 00:00:29,528 ♪ In the Great North. ♪ 14 00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:33,365 (cheering) 15 00:00:35,094 --> 00:00:37,611 Well, according to the electronic mail blast 16 00:00:37,763 --> 00:00:38,871 Mayor Peppers sent out this afternoon, 17 00:00:39,098 --> 00:00:40,614 there's still no word on that reindeer 18 00:00:40,690 --> 00:00:42,857 that went missing from the Lone Moose Santa's Village. 19 00:00:42,877 --> 00:00:44,601 Probably a Gone Girl situation. 20 00:00:44,620 --> 00:00:47,046 Kidnapped himself to teach his husband to be nicer to him. 21 00:00:47,273 --> 00:00:48,605 So, by my count, there's an entire 22 00:00:48,624 --> 00:00:50,549 Yule log cake right here for each of us. 23 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,034 Should we skip the Lone Moose town party and just dig in? 24 00:00:53,054 --> 00:00:54,202 Honeybee, we would never miss 25 00:00:54,296 --> 00:00:55,554 the white elephant gift exchange. 26 00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:58,223 Last year I got a mouse pad with a picture of Dory 27 00:00:58,450 --> 00:01:01,209 from Finding Nemo that said "Just Keep Scrolling" on it. 28 00:01:01,303 --> 00:01:02,636 Oh, yeah, it's so fun to get, 29 00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:04,137 but it's also fun to give. 30 00:01:04,214 --> 00:01:05,397 This year I wrapped up my leggings 31 00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,766 with homemade calf implants to give away. 32 00:01:07,993 --> 00:01:09,476 Those are sure to be a hot commod. 33 00:01:09,628 --> 00:01:11,978 They're too heavy to stand in, but sitting down? 34 00:01:12,131 --> 00:01:13,847 Heads are a-turning, believe me. 35 00:01:13,908 --> 00:01:15,299 I'm so glad you're getting rid of those. 36 00:01:15,392 --> 00:01:16,800 I swear to God they come to life at night 37 00:01:16,819 --> 00:01:17,910 and dance around. (groans) 38 00:01:18,137 --> 00:01:19,411 Now, I'm a little sad to say goodbye 39 00:01:19,638 --> 00:01:20,987 to my giant novelty pencil Tiffany. 40 00:01:21,140 --> 00:01:22,414 But I can't keep both her 41 00:01:22,641 --> 00:01:24,641 and my giant novelty Montblanc pen Sturgis. 42 00:01:24,734 --> 00:01:27,644 Yeah, it can be a challenge to decide to let go of something. 43 00:01:27,737 --> 00:01:30,130 And then other times someone else can decide 44 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:32,574 for you that it's time to let go of something. 45 00:01:32,668 --> 00:01:34,818 And so, thus, out of nowhere and for no reason at all, 46 00:01:34,911 --> 00:01:37,579 I must ask you, Father, whether you are thinking 47 00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,414 of using this gift exchange tonight 48 00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:41,842 to again give away something we all love. 49 00:01:41,994 --> 00:01:43,268 I feel like there's a story here. 50 00:01:43,495 --> 00:01:44,494 There's no story. 51 00:01:44,513 --> 00:01:46,346 Judy's just indulging in dramatics. 52 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:47,439 How dare you? 53 00:01:47,666 --> 00:01:48,774 Okay, I would ask you 54 00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:50,851 to take it down several notches, son. 55 00:01:50,927 --> 00:01:53,445 -He will not! -Absolutely never. -Are you insane, sir? 56 00:01:53,597 --> 00:01:56,097 Oh, there's a story. Allow me to paint a picture. 57 00:01:56,191 --> 00:01:58,692 The Tobin household used to be a place of warmth, 58 00:01:58,786 --> 00:02:00,602 laughter, merriment and music. 59 00:02:00,679 --> 00:02:02,863 All thanks to one special little man. 60 00:02:03,015 --> 00:02:05,290 An animatronic toy we Tobin children 61 00:02:05,442 --> 00:02:08,127 received from our dear papa-- Skanky. 62 00:02:08,278 --> 00:02:10,537 ♪ A little bit of Christmas in my life ♪ 63 00:02:10,689 --> 00:02:12,947 ♪ A little bit of Christmas by my side... ♪ 64 00:02:13,116 --> 00:02:14,875 WOLF: Everyone loved Skanky. 65 00:02:15,027 --> 00:02:18,470 Everyone except the very man who had given him to us. 66 00:02:18,622 --> 00:02:19,880 (delighted laughter) 67 00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:21,473 Skanky was our Christmas companion. 68 00:02:21,700 --> 00:02:25,369 ♪ A little bit of Christmas is what I see... ♪ 69 00:02:25,462 --> 00:02:27,871 JUDY: He looked so handsome in our family photos. 70 00:02:27,890 --> 00:02:28,981 WOLF: A total stud. 71 00:02:29,132 --> 00:02:30,816 For those years that we owned Skanky, 72 00:02:30,967 --> 00:02:33,635 as a family, I can confidently say we'd never been happier. 73 00:02:33,729 --> 00:02:37,230 But then, a few Christmases ago, everything changed. 74 00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:40,400 A grinch, the very same grinch who had gifted us 75 00:02:40,552 --> 00:02:42,736 our beloved bouncing baby boy, 76 00:02:42,812 --> 00:02:43,996 ripped Skanky from our hands 77 00:02:44,147 --> 00:02:45,164 and callously gave him away 78 00:02:45,315 --> 00:02:46,390 at the gift exchange. 79 00:02:46,483 --> 00:02:49,001 -(all gasp) -Why, Father, why? 80 00:02:49,228 --> 00:02:50,002 BEEF: That's right. 81 00:02:50,229 --> 00:02:51,077 And I'd do it again. 82 00:02:51,172 --> 00:02:52,579 We tried to get Skanky back 83 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,489 from Londra, but we'd already used up our turns, 84 00:02:54,583 --> 00:02:56,066 and according to the sacred rules 85 00:02:56,084 --> 00:02:58,010 of the white elephant, he was gone forever. 86 00:02:58,161 --> 00:03:00,420 And we searched the whole Internet thousands of times, 87 00:03:00,572 --> 00:03:02,664 but there were no Skankys to buy anywhere. 88 00:03:02,758 --> 00:03:05,742 He was recalled due to a couple of very mild house fires. 89 00:03:05,761 --> 00:03:08,187 Wait, you gave away a toy the kids loved, Beef? 90 00:03:08,338 --> 00:03:09,746 That doesn't sound like you. 91 00:03:09,765 --> 00:03:11,598 Normally you'd give the kids the shirt off your back. 92 00:03:11,750 --> 00:03:13,841 I mean, I've literally seen you do that dozens of times 93 00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:15,268 when Wolf has forgotten to get dressed. 94 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,587 I know it makes no sense to you, Honeybee, 95 00:03:17,606 --> 00:03:19,256 but you never saw that abomination 96 00:03:19,425 --> 00:03:21,274 that I innocently gifted to my children. 97 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:25,370 I knew no peace when that thing gyrated amongst us. 98 00:03:25,522 --> 00:03:26,688 So I did what I had to do. 99 00:03:26,782 --> 00:03:29,599 And now here we sit, with no Skank in our tank, 100 00:03:29,618 --> 00:03:31,025 year after year. 101 00:03:31,119 --> 00:03:34,287 I sure hope Londra appreciates that gorgeous green angel. 102 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:37,090 All right, well, that was a fun trip down memory lane. 103 00:03:37,276 --> 00:03:38,942 -Let's get ready to go. -Psst. 104 00:03:38,961 --> 00:03:41,887 Hey, Ham, Judy, I need your help with, uh... 105 00:03:42,038 --> 00:03:43,947 wrapping something outside. 106 00:03:43,966 --> 00:03:45,540 Can you meet me near the old outhouse? 107 00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:50,287 Ooh, yeah, I love to wrap gifts with the wind in my hair. 108 00:03:50,380 --> 00:03:52,880 All right, you know the, uh, reindeer that went missing? 109 00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:56,977 I, uh, may have some important evidence about where he is. 110 00:03:57,129 --> 00:03:58,403 Dish, girl. 111 00:03:58,555 --> 00:03:59,796 When did you start talking like that? 112 00:03:59,815 --> 00:04:01,147 Just now. I didn't like it. 113 00:04:01,242 --> 00:04:02,908 But, you know, dish, girl. 114 00:04:03,059 --> 00:04:05,485 Okay, I can't stop. For real. Dish. God. 115 00:04:05,637 --> 00:04:07,654 Okay, so, I always go to the Santa's Village. 116 00:04:07,806 --> 00:04:08,747 Even though it's rundown 117 00:04:08,974 --> 00:04:10,824 and one year I got fleas from an elf there, 118 00:04:10,976 --> 00:04:12,325 I like to tell Santa what I want. 119 00:04:12,402 --> 00:04:13,810 I know it's not really him, 120 00:04:13,829 --> 00:04:15,069 but he's an official surrogate, 121 00:04:15,163 --> 00:04:16,571 and it can't hurt to put in 122 00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:18,315 a little face time if you want the good stuff. 123 00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:20,592 But on my way out, I noticed something alarming. 124 00:04:20,744 --> 00:04:22,076 Unlike other years, 125 00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:24,170 the reindeer weren't poorly painted plywood. 126 00:04:24,323 --> 00:04:25,747 They were using a real one. 127 00:04:25,841 --> 00:04:31,103 Turning a majestic beast into a clown? I don't think so. 128 00:04:33,682 --> 00:04:36,024 Get. You can't follow me. 129 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:37,759 I said "get." 130 00:04:37,927 --> 00:04:40,737 Don't you dare make me fall in love with you. 131 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:43,282 Damn you. 132 00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:46,285 So, what you're telling us is that you're gonna 133 00:04:46,436 --> 00:04:48,102 open this door and we're gonna see a reindeer? 134 00:04:48,196 --> 00:04:50,938 Moon, as your older sister, I must say that is not okay. 135 00:04:51,107 --> 00:04:52,866 That reindeer needs to go back now. 136 00:04:53,035 --> 00:04:55,368 And I love this reindeer and I am his mother now 137 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:56,778 and we are keeping him forever. 138 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,964 His name was Rudolph. Humiliating. 139 00:04:59,115 --> 00:05:02,134 I renamed him Wilhelm after Georg Wilhelm Steller, 140 00:05:02,285 --> 00:05:03,877 the pioneer naturalist-- duh. 141 00:05:04,029 --> 00:05:06,471 Aww. Wilhelm, you lovable scamp. 142 00:05:06,623 --> 00:05:07,881 -(snarls) -Ouch. 143 00:05:08,033 --> 00:05:08,974 Uh-uh, don't get close to his food. 144 00:05:09,051 --> 00:05:10,458 He eats a lot. 145 00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:12,536 They must have been starving him because it's nonstop. 146 00:05:12,629 --> 00:05:13,961 Should we maybe tell Dad? 147 00:05:13,981 --> 00:05:17,131 Ham, no. The reindeer chose me and I know Dad. 148 00:05:17,151 --> 00:05:19,985 He's gonna make me bring Wilhelm back to that awful place 149 00:05:20,136 --> 00:05:22,654 because it's "the right thing to do." Yuck. 150 00:05:22,881 --> 00:05:26,216 Well, it is very magical to have a secret reindeer 151 00:05:26,234 --> 00:05:27,492 in your outhouse at Christmastime. 152 00:05:27,644 --> 00:05:29,553 Then it's settled. We're keeping him forever. 153 00:05:29,571 --> 00:05:31,854 Okay, he has plenty of food to last him while we're gone. 154 00:05:31,856 --> 00:05:35,742 Be good, Wilhelm. Your mother, Judy-- me-- loves you forever. 155 00:05:35,952 --> 00:05:37,151 (rustling) 156 00:05:37,171 --> 00:05:39,171 MOON: Uh, uh-oh. 157 00:05:39,247 --> 00:05:40,655 Wilhelm already ate all the food 158 00:05:40,749 --> 00:05:43,083 -and now he's eating the toilet. -Kids, let's go! 159 00:05:43,235 --> 00:05:45,344 Uh, Dad, we're not done wrapping our gifts yet, 160 00:05:45,495 --> 00:05:47,237 and they're very, uh, fragrant. 161 00:05:47,255 --> 00:05:50,090 They in fact stink and we don't want the house to stink so... 162 00:05:50,242 --> 00:05:51,999 Anyway, we'll take the van and meet you there. 163 00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:53,593 You guys go in Honeybee's convertible. 164 00:05:53,745 --> 00:05:55,169 Okay, see you there. 165 00:05:55,189 --> 00:05:56,763 Good luck with your smelly gifts. 166 00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:59,507 As I see it, the only solution is to bring Wilhelm with us. 167 00:05:59,526 --> 00:06:01,251 You know, we'll just put him in the van 168 00:06:01,344 --> 00:06:03,086 and then we'll store him in the supply shed at the VFW 169 00:06:03,105 --> 00:06:04,863 and we'll just keep feeding him all night 170 00:06:05,014 --> 00:06:06,514 since there will be tons of food there. 171 00:06:06,592 --> 00:06:08,091 I hope he likes deviled eggs and green bean casserole. 172 00:06:08,184 --> 00:06:10,702 I've seen him eat poop, so we're probably good. 173 00:06:10,929 --> 00:06:12,371 MAYOR PEPPERS: Hey, Honeybee. 174 00:06:12,522 --> 00:06:13,521 Try some akutaq? 175 00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:14,614 Now, we don't have this in Fresno. 176 00:06:14,766 --> 00:06:15,615 What's going on in here? 177 00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:16,766 Hit me with the ingredients. 178 00:06:16,785 --> 00:06:17,876 -Sugar. -Great start. 179 00:06:18,027 --> 00:06:19,102 -Crisco. -All right. 180 00:06:19,195 --> 00:06:20,212 -White fish. -Now you got me. 181 00:06:20,363 --> 00:06:23,256 -And blueberries. -Okay, let's go. 182 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,551 All right. Let's put out everything we brought 183 00:06:26,778 --> 00:06:29,203 and then I'll restock using stuff from the potlatch table. 184 00:06:29,297 --> 00:06:30,780 Yeah, and if he gets bored, 185 00:06:30,799 --> 00:06:32,874 I can show him some Madam Secretary on my phone. 186 00:06:32,968 --> 00:06:36,469 Welcome to Lone Moose's annual white elephant gift exchange. 187 00:06:36,622 --> 00:06:37,712 First order of business, 188 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,398 we're still looking for the missing reindeer 189 00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:41,900 from Santa's Village, so if you see some reindeer, 190 00:06:42,051 --> 00:06:43,050 say some reindeer. 191 00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:45,237 Now, here's the rules. I draw a name. 192 00:06:45,388 --> 00:06:46,738 You can either open a gift 193 00:06:46,965 --> 00:06:49,149 or steal an already unwrapped gift from someone else. 194 00:06:49,301 --> 00:06:52,318 And once a gift is stolen three times, it's out of play. 195 00:06:52,471 --> 00:06:54,971 -No trading after the game. -And no cheating. 196 00:06:55,064 --> 00:06:56,489 I'm talking to you, white people. 197 00:06:56,642 --> 00:06:59,459 You heard him. Okay, now let's have some fun. 198 00:07:00,737 --> 00:07:03,404 Oh, great, a giant pencil. Every kid's dream. 199 00:07:03,573 --> 00:07:06,073 Now I just need some giant homework. 200 00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:08,001 Up next is Ham Tobin. 201 00:07:08,077 --> 00:07:09,428 (cheering, whooping) 202 00:07:09,579 --> 00:07:11,430 Hmm. What to choose? 203 00:07:11,657 --> 00:07:14,824 If it don't make a jangle, it ain't my thangle! 204 00:07:14,918 --> 00:07:17,010 A book? Uh, no, thanks. 205 00:07:17,162 --> 00:07:18,995 Ten seconds. 206 00:07:19,014 --> 00:07:21,014 Wait, it-it can't be. 207 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:22,682 It's Skanky? 208 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:23,942 -(cheering) -What? No! 209 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:26,486 ♪ One, two, three, four, five ♪ 210 00:07:26,596 --> 00:07:28,354 ♪ Everybody loves a skank at Christmastime... ♪ 211 00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:29,573 Skanky. 212 00:07:32,694 --> 00:07:35,770 No, no. Londra, how could you regift Skanky? 213 00:07:35,864 --> 00:07:37,013 You won him fair and square 214 00:07:37,032 --> 00:07:39,032 and you have to suffer the consequences. 215 00:07:39,184 --> 00:07:41,685 Sorry, Beef, Dusty loves Skanky but I hate him. 216 00:07:41,703 --> 00:07:44,612 I even have a reoccurring dream where she leaves me for him. 217 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,131 I can't move my hips like that. 218 00:07:46,358 --> 00:07:47,632 What part are the hips? 219 00:07:47,859 --> 00:07:48,967 I don't know, Delmer. 220 00:07:49,194 --> 00:07:50,860 Dusty flew to Ketchikan tonight to see her brother 221 00:07:50,954 --> 00:07:52,954 so I betrayed her and brought Skanky here 222 00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:54,473 and now I'm free. Free! 223 00:07:54,700 --> 00:07:56,290 Great decision, Londra. 224 00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:57,809 Brothers and Honeybee, a word? 225 00:07:58,036 --> 00:07:59,478 This is a huge development for us. 226 00:07:59,629 --> 00:08:01,037 We were just saying we wanted Skanky back 227 00:08:01,056 --> 00:08:02,630 and this is clearly a Christmas miracle. 228 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:03,923 But he's not safe yet, okay? 229 00:08:04,075 --> 00:08:05,299 He can still be stolen up to three times. 230 00:08:05,393 --> 00:08:06,726 We need a plan. 231 00:08:06,878 --> 00:08:09,804 How about I just bite anyone who tries to take Skanky? 232 00:08:09,898 --> 00:08:11,397 -Great plan. -Terrible plan. 233 00:08:11,550 --> 00:08:13,492 -(all yell) -How did you get in the huddle, Dad? 234 00:08:13,719 --> 00:08:15,051 Stealth and cunning. 235 00:08:15,220 --> 00:08:17,403 And that's how I'll get rid of Skanky once and for all. 236 00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:19,572 Ugh, you know what, Dad? I hate all this tension. 237 00:08:19,725 --> 00:08:20,999 Let me give you a hug. 238 00:08:21,150 --> 00:08:22,726 Oh. Sure, son. I'll always take a hug. 239 00:08:22,744 --> 00:08:24,986 (whispering): I will take you down tonight. 240 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:26,396 I don't care who you are. 241 00:08:26,565 --> 00:08:29,749 Tobins, listen, I respect your intergenerational feud, 242 00:08:29,901 --> 00:08:31,176 but if it's okay with you guys, 243 00:08:31,327 --> 00:08:32,660 I'm gonna pick the next name. 244 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:33,586 -Fine. -Fine. 245 00:08:33,739 --> 00:08:34,921 -Quinn. -Moon. 246 00:08:35,073 --> 00:08:36,664 I trust you're enjoying a pleasant evening. 247 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:40,093 Yes, I am. Our family heirloom, Skanky the Christmas tree, 248 00:08:40,262 --> 00:08:42,670 has been returned to our loving arms. 249 00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,080 Hmm. Congratulations. 250 00:08:44,099 --> 00:08:46,249 I'm sorry, but is that reindeer fur on your coat? 251 00:08:46,268 --> 00:08:49,528 Mm. That depends on how good you are at keeping secrets. 252 00:08:49,604 --> 00:08:51,679 Uh, extremely. Plus, I know it's reindeer fur. 253 00:08:51,773 --> 00:08:54,181 Ms. Hill is letting me do an independent course 254 00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:56,109 in Santa Studies for extra credit, 255 00:08:56,261 --> 00:08:57,443 but I'd do it for free. 256 00:08:57,596 --> 00:08:58,870 If you've been commingling with a reindeer, 257 00:08:59,097 --> 00:09:00,187 I'd love to take a look. 258 00:09:00,265 --> 00:09:02,282 I suppose that could be arranged. 259 00:09:02,434 --> 00:09:04,601 Grab those fully loaded potato skins and follow me. 260 00:09:04,619 --> 00:09:06,193 And if anyone asks where you're going, 261 00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:08,788 just laugh and say, "I know, right?" 262 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:09,881 Jerry, you're up. 263 00:09:10,033 --> 00:09:11,216 (cheering, whooping) 264 00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:13,034 Well, you know I love a gift certificate, 265 00:09:13,128 --> 00:09:15,461 so I've been eyeing this little envelope all night. 266 00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:18,464 I knew it. Ooh, and it's to the Cheesecake Factory. 267 00:09:18,617 --> 00:09:20,875 No, not to the Cheesecake Factory. 268 00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:24,137 Oh, it's to Cheesecake's Factory. 269 00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:25,546 Yep. You can take any bong you want 270 00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:28,215 out of my collection of tens of handmade bongs. 271 00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:31,628 Including my respectful memorial Ruth Bader Gingsbong. 272 00:09:31,721 --> 00:09:36,408 Adorable antlers, hardy hooves, soulful eyes. 273 00:09:36,635 --> 00:09:38,026 Cute Christmas collar. 274 00:09:38,136 --> 00:09:39,135 Hmm, this one's a keeper. 275 00:09:39,228 --> 00:09:40,394 MOON: Wow, he loves you. 276 00:09:40,414 --> 00:09:41,395 -She. -Huh? 277 00:09:41,489 --> 00:09:42,188 She loves me. 278 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:43,582 But he has antlers. 279 00:09:43,733 --> 00:09:46,585 Moon. Moon, Moon, Moon, Moon, Moon, Moon, Moon. 280 00:09:46,736 --> 00:09:48,812 There are certain circumstances under which 281 00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:51,147 female reindeer keep their antlers. 282 00:09:51,166 --> 00:09:52,482 -We're gonna need some help. -Why? 283 00:09:52,575 --> 00:09:54,593 I assume you know where babies come from. 284 00:09:54,744 --> 00:09:57,003 I mean, I wish I didn't, but yeah, I do. 285 00:09:57,097 --> 00:10:00,081 Huh. Well, they're about to come from this reindeer. 286 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,300 -(Wilhelm moaning) -Oh, gotcha. 287 00:10:02,527 --> 00:10:04,102 I think I know someone who can help. 288 00:10:04,329 --> 00:10:05,586 LONDRA: Oh, wow. 289 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:07,513 A copy of Matthew McConaughey's vampire novel, 290 00:10:07,666 --> 00:10:09,256 I'll Bite, I'll Bite, I'll Bite. 291 00:10:09,276 --> 00:10:12,018 Mm. It's just okay. A lot of plot holes. 292 00:10:12,170 --> 00:10:13,761 What fun. And now we have Vera. 293 00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:16,339 Vera, will you steal or unwrap? 294 00:10:16,341 --> 00:10:18,766 I'll take the sexual tree. 295 00:10:18,935 --> 00:10:20,677 -No! -What in the candy cane? 296 00:10:20,695 --> 00:10:24,681 Vera, I never imagined myself saying this, but thank you. 297 00:10:24,850 --> 00:10:26,032 I'm not doing this for you. 298 00:10:26,109 --> 00:10:28,943 This fella reminds me of my dead husband 299 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,854 who also had a globular midsection 300 00:10:30,856 --> 00:10:35,024 and, frankly, I find Skanky erotically interesting. 301 00:10:35,043 --> 00:10:36,192 Guys, what's the play here? 302 00:10:36,361 --> 00:10:39,304 What if I hit Vera in the head? 303 00:10:39,497 --> 00:10:42,474 I'm not saying no, but we don't need to panic yet. 304 00:10:42,550 --> 00:10:45,292 There's still two steals left. We got this, guys. 305 00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:47,887 Whichever of us goes next steals Skanky, 306 00:10:48,039 --> 00:10:49,706 and then whoever's last steals him again. 307 00:10:49,724 --> 00:10:52,709 -Taking him out of play. Yeah, right, perfect. -God, I'm good. 308 00:10:52,727 --> 00:10:55,211 I should do an Ocean's Eleven, maybe a Twelve. 309 00:10:55,230 --> 00:10:57,230 And we've got Honeybee Shaw-Tobin. 310 00:10:57,306 --> 00:10:59,306 -Oh, no. -Yes, that's our first steal. 311 00:10:59,401 --> 00:11:01,159 It's all coming together. You hear that, Skanky? 312 00:11:01,310 --> 00:11:03,477 You're coming home, my boy. 313 00:11:03,571 --> 00:11:05,889 Oh, uh, sorry, my Christmas cutie, 314 00:11:05,891 --> 00:11:08,833 you must be confused. Skanky's over there, with Vera. 315 00:11:08,985 --> 00:11:10,818 Hmm. This one feels interesting. 316 00:11:10,912 --> 00:11:12,504 What are you doing? What is she doing? 317 00:11:12,731 --> 00:11:14,839 Christmas cutie? Uh, holiday hottie? 318 00:11:15,066 --> 00:11:17,658 Yuletide bride? My passionate poinsettia? 319 00:11:17,752 --> 00:11:19,068 W-What's happening? 320 00:11:19,087 --> 00:11:20,253 Maybe she can't hear us. 321 00:11:20,389 --> 00:11:22,071 The acoustics in here are not ideal. 322 00:11:22,165 --> 00:11:24,349 Honeybee, look at me! Look at me, damn it! 323 00:11:24,518 --> 00:11:25,332 Ten seconds. 324 00:11:25,352 --> 00:11:27,352 All right, this one looks fine. 325 00:11:27,429 --> 00:11:29,521 Honeybee, what in the manger? 326 00:11:29,597 --> 00:11:32,524 I am so sorry, babe, but, um, I don't like Skanky. 327 00:11:32,675 --> 00:11:33,599 -(all gasping) -Okay? 328 00:11:33,752 --> 00:11:35,268 That thing is just gross. I can't. 329 00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,028 Honeybee, you holiday hero. 330 00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:39,680 12 dangs of Christmas! Little bummer boy! 331 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:42,926 Jingle balls! Doo-doo got run over by a frang dang! 332 00:11:42,944 --> 00:11:44,994 Are you kidding me?! 333 00:11:48,266 --> 00:11:50,875 Honeybee, my mistletoe mistress, why? 334 00:11:51,027 --> 00:11:53,102 I mean, I thought I could count on you. 335 00:11:53,196 --> 00:11:54,379 I-I thought I knew you. 336 00:11:54,530 --> 00:11:56,272 How could you keep me away from the one thing 337 00:11:56,291 --> 00:11:57,716 I love more than anything else in the world? 338 00:11:57,867 --> 00:12:00,626 The thing you love most in the world? More than me? 339 00:12:00,779 --> 00:12:02,295 Of course not. It's a tie. 340 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:04,889 Oh, my God. You guys are completely off the rails. 341 00:12:05,041 --> 00:12:06,391 Look at Skanky. 342 00:12:06,468 --> 00:12:08,375 What are those giant ornaments even supposed to be? 343 00:12:08,470 --> 00:12:10,453 Boobs? A butt? Wait, are they testicles? 344 00:12:10,472 --> 00:12:13,122 They're very clearly a butt. I think. Wait. 345 00:12:13,216 --> 00:12:15,567 With that placement? Sorry, babe, it's a skanks 346 00:12:15,794 --> 00:12:18,127 but no skanks for me on Skanky. 347 00:12:18,221 --> 00:12:20,296 O-kay, it's a signed picture of 348 00:12:20,298 --> 00:12:22,315 Countess Luann from The Real Housewives of New York? 349 00:12:22,467 --> 00:12:24,892 We're in a Twitter thing, so I don't want it anymore. 350 00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:27,394 And we've got Santa-iago Carpaccio, 351 00:12:27,563 --> 00:12:30,081 who is dressed as the devil for some reason? 352 00:12:30,308 --> 00:12:34,085 I accidentally ordered a Satan suit instead of a Santa suit, 353 00:12:34,312 --> 00:12:35,236 but I'm embracing it. 354 00:12:35,330 --> 00:12:36,662 You want to open or steal? 355 00:12:36,815 --> 00:12:38,648 I'm sorry, child Tobins, but I need a gift 356 00:12:38,666 --> 00:12:41,408 to send to my favorite cousin in Italy, Bobby Lasagna. 357 00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:44,578 He loves music, so I will steal that tree. 358 00:12:44,672 --> 00:12:46,005 Have fun in Italy, Skanky! 359 00:12:46,174 --> 00:12:48,600 Oh, no, this is bad. This is very, very bad. 360 00:12:48,751 --> 00:12:52,161 Vera we can simply kill, but how are we gonna get to Italy? 361 00:12:52,180 --> 00:12:54,180 Oh, I'm gonna go rage-eat some dip! 362 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:56,423 Judy, I need to see you outside. 363 00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:59,168 There's a serious medical situation with Wilhelm. 364 00:12:59,187 --> 00:13:00,520 Oh, God, Wilhelm. 365 00:13:00,688 --> 00:13:02,447 I completely forgot about our secret Christmas reindeer 366 00:13:02,674 --> 00:13:04,598 because of our public twerking Christmas tree. 367 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:06,451 Well, get your act together and come with me 368 00:13:06,602 --> 00:13:08,845 because I'm about to show you something you'll never forget. 369 00:13:08,863 --> 00:13:09,788 Let's go. 370 00:13:10,015 --> 00:13:11,514 Okay, there's only one steal left. 371 00:13:11,607 --> 00:13:13,199 If one of our names isn't pulled soon, 372 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,201 we'll lose our beloved Skanky forever. 373 00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,796 -No more Mr. Nice Wolf. -(knuckles cracking) 374 00:13:17,947 --> 00:13:19,355 Whoa, what are you gonna do? 375 00:13:19,374 --> 00:13:21,115 Oh, nothing, I just had to crack these knucks. 376 00:13:21,325 --> 00:13:22,375 They're stiffer than 377 00:13:22,527 --> 00:13:23,951 a skeleton's dong-a-long-a-ding-bong. 378 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,136 Judy Tobin. 379 00:13:25,363 --> 00:13:27,121 Yes! She can steal. She can steal. 380 00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,807 Judy, go get our man. 381 00:13:29,034 --> 00:13:30,809 Judy? Judy? 382 00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:33,311 Where in the H-E-double-L's is that girl? 383 00:13:33,538 --> 00:13:35,647 Oh! I don't know. 384 00:13:35,874 --> 00:13:38,891 She's not in a shed. With an animal. That's for sure. 385 00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:40,151 Last call for Judy Tobin. 386 00:13:40,303 --> 00:13:42,228 She's not here. Let's move it along. 387 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:44,380 Welp, back to the name barrel she goes. 388 00:13:44,473 --> 00:13:46,199 No! 389 00:13:47,828 --> 00:13:49,476 Okay, I can do this. I'm a big fan of 390 00:13:49,571 --> 00:13:51,496 the show Savor This Labor, about L.A.'s best-dressed doula. 391 00:13:51,647 --> 00:13:52,905 Um, okay... 392 00:13:53,074 --> 00:13:56,150 First things first, does she have a written birth plan? 393 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:57,577 Uh, and does anyone have a mixtape 394 00:13:57,729 --> 00:14:00,063 of her favorite songs for when it's time to push? 395 00:14:00,156 --> 00:14:01,655 Next up is Beef Tobin. 396 00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:04,584 Welp, that's the one person we know isn't gonna take Skanky. 397 00:14:04,736 --> 00:14:07,345 Well, well, well. Isn't this interesting? 398 00:14:07,496 --> 00:14:09,347 What to do? I could open a gift. 399 00:14:09,498 --> 00:14:12,016 And, yet, if I did open a present, I would be haunted 400 00:14:12,243 --> 00:14:15,019 knowing that Skanky is still out there in the world, 401 00:14:15,246 --> 00:14:16,837 skanking up my favorite holiday. 402 00:14:16,931 --> 00:14:18,598 We need to make a rule about speeches. 403 00:14:18,750 --> 00:14:20,174 Put up or shut up, fish boy. 404 00:14:20,268 --> 00:14:21,693 Delmer, geez. 405 00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:25,088 Don't ring the Del-bell if you can't handle the noise, Peppers! 406 00:14:25,090 --> 00:14:26,814 All right, Beef, what'll it be? 407 00:14:26,925 --> 00:14:28,349 I choose... 408 00:14:28,443 --> 00:14:29,350 to steal! 409 00:14:29,444 --> 00:14:30,184 Bobby Lasagna! 410 00:14:30,278 --> 00:14:31,703 Dad, where are you going? 411 00:14:31,930 --> 00:14:33,538 To put Skanky at the bottom of the river! 412 00:14:33,765 --> 00:14:36,616 Do not throw that beautiful man in the river! 413 00:14:36,768 --> 00:14:39,377 If you do this, Dad, I'll never forgive you! 414 00:14:39,528 --> 00:14:41,045 I mean, I probably will, someday, 415 00:14:41,197 --> 00:14:44,716 but n-not right away. So, just, you know, take that in 416 00:14:44,943 --> 00:14:47,368 and then decide what you want to do. 417 00:14:47,462 --> 00:14:50,129 Run, Beef, run! Make him skank with the fishes! 418 00:14:50,281 --> 00:14:52,873 Well, it wouldn't be a Lone Moose white elephant 419 00:14:52,893 --> 00:14:56,210 if someone didn't run screaming towards the river at some point. 420 00:14:56,304 --> 00:14:57,637 Next up, Archie the Wife Whittler. 421 00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,046 Will you steal or open? 422 00:14:59,140 --> 00:15:02,233 Um, I wonder what this could be. 423 00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:04,127 -Get back here, Dad! -(screaming) 424 00:15:04,145 --> 00:15:05,886 -Judy? -Moon? 425 00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:06,738 Rudolph? 426 00:15:06,965 --> 00:15:08,072 -No, we renamed him. -Her. 427 00:15:08,224 --> 00:15:09,223 Right. Right, right, right. 428 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,967 -(moaning) -You have a reindeer? 429 00:15:10,985 --> 00:15:13,077 Uh, yeah. And we're about to have several. 430 00:15:13,229 --> 00:15:15,821 So, that's the missing reindeer. 431 00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:17,990 And the town is getting a new reindeer baby. 432 00:15:18,143 --> 00:15:19,475 Oh, hell yeah. 433 00:15:19,568 --> 00:15:21,419 This is better than when we got a Macaroni Grill. 434 00:15:21,570 --> 00:15:23,496 -(groaning) -I hope your dad gets back with the vet soon. 435 00:15:23,572 --> 00:15:26,482 I mean, I've watched thousands of reindeer birthing videos 436 00:15:26,575 --> 00:15:28,575 but it's different dealing with the real thing. 437 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:31,170 Which is something they always say in the videos. 438 00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:33,339 I found the vet, I found Dr. French. 439 00:15:33,491 --> 00:15:35,916 I was hucking snowballs at cars on the side of the road. 440 00:15:36,010 --> 00:15:37,084 Helps me blow off steam. 441 00:15:37,178 --> 00:15:38,511 Now, where is the reindeer? 442 00:15:38,663 --> 00:15:40,163 -Is it you? -Uh... 443 00:15:40,181 --> 00:15:41,422 Ha. Just kidding. 444 00:15:41,516 --> 00:15:43,107 Guys, I know what reindeers look like. 445 00:15:43,259 --> 00:15:44,776 I assume this is the missing gal 446 00:15:44,927 --> 00:15:46,444 from Lone Moose's nasty Santa display? 447 00:15:46,595 --> 00:15:48,780 -Yup. She followed me out of her pen. -Makes sense. 448 00:15:49,007 --> 00:15:51,524 She was looking for somewhere private to let 'em loose. 449 00:15:51,676 --> 00:15:54,101 Holy hot dogs, this reindeer is about to give birth 450 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,845 and is-- whoo-- fully dilated. 451 00:15:55,863 --> 00:15:58,848 Just as I suspected based on the timing of her contractions. 452 00:15:58,866 --> 00:16:01,459 You a veterinarian too, only tiny? 453 00:16:01,610 --> 00:16:03,461 Are we dealing with a Doogie-type situation here? 454 00:16:03,612 --> 00:16:06,447 I'm more of a Santa-ologist but I can scrub in, if you need me. 455 00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:07,799 All right, I'm gonna need someone 456 00:16:07,950 --> 00:16:09,450 to put a blanket down here because 457 00:16:09,527 --> 00:16:11,377 we're all about to have some babies together. 458 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,304 Ah! Oh, my God, they're half human! 459 00:16:13,456 --> 00:16:16,015 Just kidding. Sorry, guys, I'm just a lot of fun. 460 00:16:19,370 --> 00:16:23,147 -Here it comes. Aww. -It's a miracle. 461 00:16:23,299 --> 00:16:26,392 A miracle that smells very, very bad. 462 00:16:26,544 --> 00:16:29,562 Skanky, meet the reindeer. Reindeer, meet the Skanky. 463 00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:32,657 Aww, look at how she licks her babies to get them walking. 464 00:16:32,808 --> 00:16:35,476 Reminds me of when Mom used to throw wet sponges at us 465 00:16:35,570 --> 00:16:37,236 when she wanted us to leave the house. 466 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:38,604 So adorable. 467 00:16:38,681 --> 00:16:40,832 Mayor Peppers, I hope I didn't ruin the party. 468 00:16:41,059 --> 00:16:42,316 No, no, no, Moon. 469 00:16:42,410 --> 00:16:44,669 Birthing a reindeer together during a Christmas party 470 00:16:44,746 --> 00:16:46,337 is what this town is all about. 471 00:16:46,564 --> 00:16:47,839 I'm... (sniffles) 472 00:16:48,066 --> 00:16:49,340 Well, I'm a little... 473 00:16:49,492 --> 00:16:50,341 Oh, gosh. 474 00:16:50,493 --> 00:16:52,418 Let it out, Peps. Let it all out. 475 00:16:52,495 --> 00:16:53,569 Dad, you're not really 476 00:16:53,662 --> 00:16:55,346 gonna throw Skanky in the river, are you? 477 00:16:55,573 --> 00:16:56,514 Of course not. 478 00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:58,741 I'm going to wade in and then hold him under. 479 00:16:58,910 --> 00:16:59,851 Dad! 480 00:17:00,078 --> 00:17:02,245 Sorry, sorry. I just really hate Skanky. 481 00:17:02,263 --> 00:17:04,171 Not just because it's an abomination 482 00:17:04,265 --> 00:17:06,265 with chesticles or a high front butt, 483 00:17:06,417 --> 00:17:08,509 or because it has the voice of a drunk demon, 484 00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,010 it's so much more. 485 00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:11,178 All right, spill it, Beef. 486 00:17:11,314 --> 00:17:12,438 Why do you hate Skanky so much? 487 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,258 (sighs) It's a very personal story, 488 00:17:15,351 --> 00:17:18,444 so I guess I'll just say it here in front of the entire town. 489 00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:21,113 It was my first Christmas as a single dad 490 00:17:21,282 --> 00:17:22,782 and I was low on cash, 491 00:17:22,934 --> 00:17:25,601 so I made what, in hindsight, was a very stupid decision. 492 00:17:25,620 --> 00:17:27,879 I spent a lot of money to rent a crab boat, 493 00:17:28,106 --> 00:17:32,216 and took a gamble on crab season thinking I might strike it rich. 494 00:17:32,368 --> 00:17:36,203 Not only was I not successful, I sank the rented boat. 495 00:17:36,297 --> 00:17:37,555 Disaster. 496 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:40,541 When the holidays came, I was hard-pressed for cash. 497 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,118 And I mean pressed. 498 00:17:42,136 --> 00:17:44,044 All December, I'd stay up late at night, 499 00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:46,972 trying to figure out how to buy you guys 500 00:17:47,125 --> 00:17:48,457 even a single cheap thing each. 501 00:17:48,551 --> 00:17:50,401 In the end, I took my very small amount 502 00:17:50,628 --> 00:17:53,129 to the "97 cents" section at the pharmacy downtown 503 00:17:53,131 --> 00:17:55,889 and just went nuts buying random items, 504 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,576 including Skanky. 505 00:17:58,803 --> 00:18:00,244 So, whenever I see that thing, 506 00:18:00,396 --> 00:18:02,914 it reminds me of the year I really blew it, 507 00:18:03,065 --> 00:18:04,916 and I'm filled with Christmas shame. 508 00:18:05,143 --> 00:18:07,159 Dad, are you talking about Wacky Christmas? 509 00:18:07,312 --> 00:18:08,494 Yeah, also known as Wackmas. 510 00:18:08,646 --> 00:18:10,329 We loved that weird-ass Christmas! 511 00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:12,481 Remember the reams of copy paper? 512 00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:15,075 I played so many rounds of "small publishing house 513 00:18:15,095 --> 00:18:17,987 trying to publish an unknown female poet's chapbook." 514 00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:19,322 Oh, it was very fun for me. 515 00:18:19,415 --> 00:18:21,657 Oh, and I loved that huge tube of toothpaste. 516 00:18:21,750 --> 00:18:24,844 I was so mad my teeth weren't more gigantic. I'm still mad. 517 00:18:24,996 --> 00:18:28,681 So, that year's Christmas really wasn't the depths of misery? 518 00:18:28,833 --> 00:18:29,832 No way! 519 00:18:29,851 --> 00:18:31,183 Well, I'm glad to hear it. 520 00:18:31,336 --> 00:18:33,111 Beef, it sounds like you don't need to be ashamed 521 00:18:33,338 --> 00:18:35,020 of Skanky because of that failed Christmas. 522 00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:36,339 The kids clearly loved it. 523 00:18:36,432 --> 00:18:37,782 So, you can just be ashamed of Skanky 524 00:18:37,933 --> 00:18:39,175 because he's absolutely awful. 525 00:18:39,344 --> 00:18:41,402 Indeed. But I do promise you guys 526 00:18:41,512 --> 00:18:43,863 I didn't just get you a bunch of copy paper this year. 527 00:18:43,957 --> 00:18:47,441 Well, I don't need anything. I've got five new reindeer pets. 528 00:18:47,535 --> 00:18:50,611 Moon, no one's mad at you for hiding the reindeer. 529 00:18:50,688 --> 00:18:53,447 That sham Santa setup downtown is a disaster. 530 00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,282 I mean, one of the angels stole my wallet. 531 00:18:55,301 --> 00:18:56,634 But we-- 532 00:18:56,861 --> 00:18:59,637 and I feel like I should not actually have to say this-- 533 00:18:59,788 --> 00:19:01,848 are not keeping five reindeer. 534 00:19:01,957 --> 00:19:03,199 (sighs) Okay. 535 00:19:03,384 --> 00:19:06,160 They could go to the wild animal sanctuary in Death Cliff. 536 00:19:06,162 --> 00:19:07,553 It's so nice, I'd move in. 537 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:08,962 -Really? -No. Come on. 538 00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:10,723 I'm a doctor of veterinary medicine. 539 00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:13,225 I live in a wonderful two bedroom, one bath downtown. 540 00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:14,986 Crown molding, updated appliances. 541 00:19:15,137 --> 00:19:16,470 Honestly, it would blow your minds. 542 00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:19,473 ♪ Hark the herald angels sing ♪ 543 00:19:19,567 --> 00:19:22,643 ♪ Glory to the newborn Skank ♪ 544 00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:23,828 Huh, that's weird. 545 00:19:23,979 --> 00:19:25,479 Never heard Skanky sing this one. 546 00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:28,073 (gasps) It's an actual Christmas miracle. 547 00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,651 Or a Skanky software glitch. But I prefer the former. 548 00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,504 Wow, huh, the reindeer really love Skanky. 549 00:19:33,731 --> 00:19:35,731 Yeah, they seem to have attached to him. 550 00:19:35,750 --> 00:19:38,067 It's a thing. Kind of like me and my domesticated weasel. 551 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:39,510 I am obsessed with him. 552 00:19:39,737 --> 00:19:41,404 Maybe the reindeer will feel better 553 00:19:41,422 --> 00:19:43,664 if Skanky goes with them to the sanctuary. 554 00:19:43,832 --> 00:19:45,349 Aww. It'll be a Skank-tuary. 555 00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:47,852 Yeah, then we can visit them all together. 556 00:19:48,079 --> 00:19:48,853 We all will. 557 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:50,188 -Not me. -Skanky can rot. 558 00:19:50,339 --> 00:19:52,005 And now back to the party. 559 00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:54,025 Let's light this freakin' candle already. 560 00:19:54,176 --> 00:19:55,434 (cheering, whooping) 561 00:19:56,254 --> 00:19:57,269 HONEYBEE: Aw, a giant eraser. 562 00:19:57,363 --> 00:19:58,771 I love it. Now I just got to get 563 00:19:58,847 --> 00:20:00,347 my giant pencil back from Henry. 564 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:02,700 That's not all. Look what else is in the box. 565 00:20:02,927 --> 00:20:04,093 Babe, you didn't. 566 00:20:04,186 --> 00:20:05,686 Tickets to see Mrs. Doubtfire On Ice? 567 00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:07,038 (as Mrs. Doubtfire): Hello! 568 00:20:07,265 --> 00:20:08,431 (as Mrs. Doubtfire): It was a skate-by fruiting. 569 00:20:08,433 --> 00:20:10,433 Dad, this one's from all of us. 570 00:20:10,451 --> 00:20:13,602 Ugh, I have a very bad feeling this might be Skanky. 571 00:20:13,621 --> 00:20:16,439 No way. We know you hated Skanky, Dad. 572 00:20:16,441 --> 00:20:18,274 -We accept it. -I swear it's not him. 573 00:20:18,292 --> 00:20:19,792 And you know I don't throw promises around 574 00:20:19,944 --> 00:20:22,503 all loosey-goosey like the rest of these psychopaths. 575 00:20:23,448 --> 00:20:26,373 -Ah! Oh, dear God. -(laughter) 576 00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:27,633 JUDY: There it is. 577 00:20:27,785 --> 00:20:30,877 Welcome to the family, Sleazy the Nasty Snowman. 578 00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:32,137 Oh, hell no. 579 00:20:32,290 --> 00:20:34,065 ♪ One, two, a-one, two, threeze ♪ 580 00:20:34,216 --> 00:20:36,976 ♪ Everybody in the car, so come on, let's sleaze ♪ 581 00:20:37,128 --> 00:20:38,978 This is truly my nightmare. 582 00:20:39,072 --> 00:20:40,296 When everyone is asleep, 583 00:20:40,314 --> 00:20:41,572 you're going right into the fire. 584 00:20:41,724 --> 00:20:44,467 ♪ A little bit of Sleazy in my life ♪ 585 00:20:44,485 --> 00:20:46,151 ♪ Ho ho ho, mother-jinglers ♪ 586 00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:48,228 ♪ If you're lookin' for a wintertime freak ♪ 587 00:20:48,322 --> 00:20:50,322 ♪ Well, then we're two naughty boys you got to meet ♪ 588 00:20:50,475 --> 00:20:52,324 ♪ If you leave us unattended, we might burn down your home ♪ 589 00:20:52,477 --> 00:20:54,568 ♪ Take a peep in your stocking, steal your Toblerone ♪ 590 00:20:54,737 --> 00:20:56,737 ♪ Gonna open all your presents, undecorate that tree ♪ 591 00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:58,572 ♪ Throw your granny's fruitcake out onto the street ♪ 592 00:20:58,666 --> 00:20:59,999 ♪ 'Cause we're the bad boys of Christmas ♪ 593 00:21:00,151 --> 00:21:01,908 ♪ We don't give a damn ♪ 594 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:03,744 ♪ The bad boys of Christmas, eat your holiday ham ♪ 595 00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:06,155 ♪ Gonna eat up those cookies you left for Santy Claus ♪ 596 00:21:06,173 --> 00:21:07,840 ♪ That clown don't deserve 'em, they belong in our paws ♪ 597 00:21:07,916 --> 00:21:10,009 ♪ Go straight bananas, steal your Christmas pajamas ♪ 598 00:21:10,161 --> 00:21:11,752 ♪ If you can't handle us, then go cry to your mama ♪ 599 00:21:11,829 --> 00:21:13,104 ♪ 'Cause we're the bad boys of Christmas ♪ 600 00:21:13,255 --> 00:21:14,179 ♪ We don't give a damn ♪ 601 00:21:14,332 --> 00:21:15,439 ♪ Bad boys of Christmas ♪ 602 00:21:15,666 --> 00:21:16,423 ♪ Eat your holiday ham ♪ 603 00:21:16,517 --> 00:21:17,775 ♪ BBOC, out. ♪ 604 00:21:18,002 --> 00:21:18,925 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 605 00:21:19,020 --> 00:21:19,986 and TOYOTA.