1 00:00:01,724 --> 00:00:03,689 [man] Previously on 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way. 2 00:00:03,724 --> 00:00:07,034 I feel like, right now, I have the energy to have a kid. 3 00:00:07,068 --> 00:00:09,620 There's a lot that's happening since you've moved here, right? 4 00:00:09,655 --> 00:00:11,551 You're still getting to know each other. 5 00:00:12,551 --> 00:00:14,206 -This is so high stakes. -[woman] Yeah. 6 00:00:14,241 --> 00:00:16,448 [woman] You all got married real fast. 7 00:00:16,482 --> 00:00:17,827 Take all of this in. 8 00:00:17,862 --> 00:00:19,724 You haven't even been in DR for a year. 9 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:28,896 [Wayne] Yeah. 10 00:00:29,827 --> 00:00:31,137 I just wish you would have told me. 11 00:00:31,172 --> 00:00:32,378 That's all I'm saying. 12 00:00:32,412 --> 00:00:34,517 It's almost like you don't see the severity of it. 13 00:00:36,310 --> 00:00:39,172 When you get ready to really apologize, why don't you tell me? 14 00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:42,172 [dramatic music playing] 15 00:00:44,206 --> 00:00:47,862 [Mary speaking] 16 00:00:47,896 --> 00:00:51,896 To be physically controlled where I can look, who I can speak to, 17 00:00:51,931 --> 00:00:53,724 I don't think anyone should have to live like that. 18 00:00:53,758 --> 00:00:58,448 I want you to trust that I can look and talk to anyone 19 00:00:58,482 --> 00:01:00,379 without leaving you. 20 00:01:00,413 --> 00:01:03,413 [sobs] 21 00:01:08,689 --> 00:01:11,689 [dramatic music playing] 22 00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:16,689 How do I get out of here please? 23 00:01:16,724 --> 00:01:17,896 Thank you. 24 00:01:17,931 --> 00:01:20,931 [dramatic music playing] 25 00:01:45,758 --> 00:01:47,172 You know? But-- 26 00:01:54,033 --> 00:01:55,103 [sighs] 27 00:02:12,482 --> 00:02:15,034 I felt betrayed. Like... 28 00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:18,103 Because I felt like in every decision I've made, 29 00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:19,620 he's been like a huge influence. 30 00:02:19,655 --> 00:02:21,482 Like I always keep him in mind. 31 00:02:21,517 --> 00:02:23,965 It's not like a selfish thing that I just do. 32 00:02:32,172 --> 00:02:33,689 We were supposed to go on our honeymoon. 33 00:02:33,724 --> 00:02:35,793 And that's fine. It's not even a big deal. 34 00:02:35,827 --> 00:02:37,862 It's the fact that he wasn't honest about it. 35 00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:41,275 I was just shocked. 36 00:02:53,827 --> 00:02:56,586 I... Nothing of that made sense to me. 37 00:02:56,620 --> 00:03:00,206 And I'm not the sharpest person but... 38 00:03:12,379 --> 00:03:13,517 I don't know what to do. 39 00:03:19,379 --> 00:03:23,344 But our wedding's supposed to be in like a week from now, 40 00:03:23,379 --> 00:03:27,000 and how am I gonna marry someone when they're like... 41 00:03:28,931 --> 00:03:30,310 I don't know what that was. 42 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:32,172 What kind of person would leave their fiancée 43 00:03:32,206 --> 00:03:35,551 like stuck in the middle of nowhere? 44 00:03:35,586 --> 00:03:37,689 I mean, like he knows I don't know my way around here 45 00:03:37,724 --> 00:03:39,067 and he just took off. 46 00:03:40,586 --> 00:03:41,620 I should put shoes on. 47 00:03:41,655 --> 00:03:44,310 There might be a needle out here or something. 48 00:03:44,344 --> 00:03:47,172 He's so concerned about my safety, but at that moment, 49 00:03:47,206 --> 00:03:48,965 I'm just like in the gutter, 50 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:51,310 just like on the side of the road 51 00:03:51,344 --> 00:03:53,034 and he didn't even come get me. 52 00:03:53,862 --> 00:03:55,482 I'm really shocked by that. 53 00:03:57,551 --> 00:03:59,344 I mean, was I... Was I bullying him? 54 00:03:59,379 --> 00:04:01,586 Was I pushing him too much? 55 00:04:01,620 --> 00:04:03,586 I don't know how it escalated like that. 56 00:04:06,310 --> 00:04:09,103 [dramatic music playing] 57 00:04:15,275 --> 00:04:19,206 Even in person, I feel like I'm still not good enough 58 00:04:19,241 --> 00:04:21,000 for your trust. 59 00:04:26,137 --> 00:04:28,413 [crying] 60 00:04:36,551 --> 00:04:39,551 [dramatic music playing] 61 00:04:43,172 --> 00:04:45,206 Do you have an inhaler? She has asthma. 62 00:04:47,379 --> 00:04:48,931 Mary, stop. 63 00:04:50,413 --> 00:04:52,379 -Stop. -[crying] 64 00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:55,689 I can't breathe. 65 00:04:55,724 --> 00:04:56,896 Stop. 66 00:04:58,068 --> 00:04:59,241 Can we just... 67 00:05:02,655 --> 00:05:03,896 You okay? 68 00:05:04,827 --> 00:05:07,103 [Zara speaking foreign language] 69 00:05:23,344 --> 00:05:24,896 [in foreign language] 70 00:05:34,655 --> 00:05:36,655 I just feel bad. 71 00:05:36,689 --> 00:05:38,965 I feel like I could have tried to confront her 72 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:40,448 a little bit more gently. 73 00:05:42,827 --> 00:05:44,862 But when Mary told me before 74 00:05:44,896 --> 00:05:47,206 that I can't look at girls at church, 75 00:05:47,241 --> 00:05:49,620 it's bull [bleep]. 76 00:05:49,655 --> 00:05:53,862 Like I can't be limited in what I can do. 77 00:05:54,551 --> 00:05:55,965 It... 78 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:59,379 I was okay with it back when I was in America, 79 00:05:59,413 --> 00:06:01,931 but we've made this like promise 80 00:06:01,965 --> 00:06:03,172 that we're not gonna do that anymore. 81 00:06:06,103 --> 00:06:09,620 It really does hurt me, 'cause when I met Mary, 82 00:06:09,655 --> 00:06:13,793 I was in a point in my life where I was like done with everything. 83 00:06:16,137 --> 00:06:18,103 I had an ex who cheated on me. 84 00:06:18,137 --> 00:06:21,068 I had a mom who was using. 85 00:06:21,103 --> 00:06:23,689 I didn't feel like I was good enough for anyone, 86 00:06:23,724 --> 00:06:25,103 not even myself, 87 00:06:25,137 --> 00:06:27,000 and I tried to take my own life. 88 00:06:44,103 --> 00:06:46,068 [sniffles] 89 00:06:51,586 --> 00:06:53,862 [Brandan] Mary reached out for the first time. 90 00:06:53,896 --> 00:06:57,586 Let's just say it was like the literal definition of a life-changer. 91 00:07:01,620 --> 00:07:03,586 I clung on so hard. 92 00:07:09,344 --> 00:07:10,482 [sniffles] 93 00:07:10,517 --> 00:07:12,000 [sighs] I love this woman. 94 00:07:12,655 --> 00:07:13,965 I do. 95 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,896 Which is why it hurts so much 96 00:07:16,931 --> 00:07:20,965 when I feel like I don't have this trust 97 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:25,068 because it brings me back to this state of mind like I'm not good enough. 98 00:07:26,862 --> 00:07:32,310 And I'm trying really hard to just hold on. 99 00:07:36,413 --> 00:07:37,310 [exhales] 100 00:07:37,344 --> 00:07:38,793 [Brandan] That's why it's so hard. 101 00:07:45,448 --> 00:07:47,000 [sighs] 102 00:07:48,724 --> 00:07:51,758 [Mary] I can't stop myself from overthinking. 103 00:07:54,448 --> 00:07:57,413 I'm trying to stop this but I can't. 104 00:08:00,862 --> 00:08:03,000 I'm afraid that... 105 00:08:03,034 --> 00:08:05,482 Brandan will leave me even though... 106 00:08:07,241 --> 00:08:09,344 I love him so much. 107 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,241 Are you okay? 108 00:08:24,206 --> 00:08:25,551 I'm sorry. 109 00:08:25,586 --> 00:08:27,310 [sniffles] It's okay. 110 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:32,827 Mary, look at me. 111 00:08:34,206 --> 00:08:36,861 I love you, okay? 112 00:08:36,895 --> 00:08:40,000 I trust you and I really love you. 113 00:08:41,413 --> 00:08:42,758 You know that, right? 114 00:08:45,379 --> 00:08:48,724 Is there anything you wanna say right now? 115 00:08:52,724 --> 00:08:57,068 I want her to say that she does genuinely trust me 116 00:08:57,103 --> 00:09:02,724 so that we can be together, married forever. 117 00:09:02,758 --> 00:09:06,310 Right now, that is the most important thing to me. 118 00:09:08,758 --> 00:09:10,206 I really need that. 119 00:09:14,551 --> 00:09:15,724 Sorry. 120 00:09:19,655 --> 00:09:20,896 Don't be sorry. 121 00:09:28,275 --> 00:09:30,137 Sorry is not the right answer. 122 00:09:31,103 --> 00:09:34,034 I feel bad for Mary working herself up 123 00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:35,586 into a panic attack 124 00:09:35,620 --> 00:09:37,379 and I know that she feels bad, 125 00:09:37,413 --> 00:09:39,000 but she doesn't trust me. 126 00:09:40,448 --> 00:09:43,896 I need her to tell me that she trusts me. 127 00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:46,931 Are you done for the day? 128 00:09:46,965 --> 00:09:48,034 Mmm-hmm. 129 00:09:56,793 --> 00:09:57,758 Yeah. 130 00:09:58,793 --> 00:10:01,137 I've been loyal to Mary for over two years. 131 00:10:01,172 --> 00:10:04,068 I've left America. I've left my family. 132 00:10:07,965 --> 00:10:10,448 [Brandan] And I don't want us to fight. 133 00:10:11,137 --> 00:10:12,793 When I got here in person, 134 00:10:12,827 --> 00:10:15,931 I was able to trust her with her friends, 135 00:10:15,965 --> 00:10:17,620 even though they were guys. 136 00:10:17,655 --> 00:10:21,275 If she can't trust me the same way, 137 00:10:21,310 --> 00:10:23,379 that makes me think, "Where is this going? 138 00:10:23,413 --> 00:10:25,206 What is our future gonna be like?" 139 00:10:26,586 --> 00:10:28,275 It makes me have doubts. 140 00:10:36,724 --> 00:10:38,241 My boyfriend's name is Sarper 141 00:10:38,275 --> 00:10:40,241 and he lives in Istanbul, Tuürkiye. 142 00:10:40,275 --> 00:10:42,068 I think you guys are gonna love him. 143 00:10:42,103 --> 00:10:43,896 He's like really down to earth. 144 00:10:43,931 --> 00:10:45,310 He... Our connection is amazing. 145 00:10:46,793 --> 00:10:48,068 Thanks Dan. 146 00:10:49,965 --> 00:10:54,620 How long after today would we be able to start this process? 147 00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,379 We could do that in 15 days. 148 00:10:56,413 --> 00:10:58,827 If we do get pregnant right away, 149 00:10:58,862 --> 00:11:03,000 we're gonna have to make sure that we're on the same page to have a baby. 150 00:11:03,034 --> 00:11:05,655 And that's where I'm really scared. 151 00:11:10,275 --> 00:11:12,379 [upbeat music playing] 152 00:11:14,448 --> 00:11:17,793 [singer] ♪ All my girls bad, Doing bad things ♪ 153 00:11:17,827 --> 00:11:21,655 ♪ Big Birkin bags, They causing big bang ♪ 154 00:11:22,413 --> 00:11:23,586 -Hi. -[woman] Hi. 155 00:11:23,620 --> 00:11:25,068 [woman] Hi. How are you? 156 00:11:25,103 --> 00:11:26,896 My name is Shekinah. I'm 41 years old. 157 00:11:26,931 --> 00:11:29,137 And I live in Los Angeles, California. 158 00:11:29,172 --> 00:11:31,310 -[woman speaking] -Thank you. 159 00:11:35,413 --> 00:11:37,137 We're gonna get out down there at the lobby. 160 00:11:37,172 --> 00:11:39,413 In Los Angeles, there's always something going on. 161 00:11:39,448 --> 00:11:40,620 There's always a party. 162 00:11:40,655 --> 00:11:42,034 There's always a premiere. 163 00:11:42,068 --> 00:11:43,551 Thank you. 164 00:11:43,586 --> 00:11:46,241 I co-host events, and it's basically my job 165 00:11:46,275 --> 00:11:49,931 to bring attractive people to just be a part of the event 166 00:11:49,965 --> 00:11:51,310 and the atmosphere. 167 00:11:51,344 --> 00:11:53,862 -Hi, babe. Thank you. -Good to see you. 168 00:11:53,896 --> 00:11:54,758 -Should we go in? -[man] Yeah. 169 00:11:54,793 --> 00:11:55,724 Okay. 170 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:57,620 So if you've ever been to an event 171 00:11:57,655 --> 00:11:59,793 where the vibe just feels right, 172 00:11:59,827 --> 00:12:01,862 it's usually because of someone like me. 173 00:12:03,310 --> 00:12:05,862 [singer] ♪ Muscles with designer tat ♪ 174 00:12:05,896 --> 00:12:08,965 ♪ If you want my number Send that CashApp ♪ 175 00:12:11,413 --> 00:12:13,862 The fashion show is gonna be so good tonight. 176 00:12:15,241 --> 00:12:16,689 People are always shocked 177 00:12:16,724 --> 00:12:18,103 when I tell them how I was raised, 178 00:12:18,137 --> 00:12:21,137 which is what I want. [chuckles] 179 00:12:22,413 --> 00:12:24,620 [singer] ♪ Ah, look ♪ 180 00:12:27,172 --> 00:12:28,344 My sisters and I. 181 00:12:28,379 --> 00:12:30,034 All six of us. 182 00:12:33,344 --> 00:12:37,000 I was raised in the Amish lifestyle. 183 00:12:38,172 --> 00:12:39,793 I grew up in Tennessee 184 00:12:39,827 --> 00:12:41,620 and I'm the oldest of six girls. 185 00:12:42,586 --> 00:12:44,482 My parents weren't born Amish, 186 00:12:44,517 --> 00:12:46,482 but they loved the Amish lifestyle 187 00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:48,965 and they had a lot of Amish friends 188 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:52,172 and they decided to just raise us like Amish. 189 00:12:52,793 --> 00:12:54,275 We all had long hair. 190 00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:56,482 We weren't allowed to cut our hair. 191 00:12:56,517 --> 00:12:58,965 No makeup, of course. 192 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:02,000 I remember so many times that I would hide behind the couch 193 00:13:02,034 --> 00:13:04,862 and color my nails with markers. 194 00:13:04,896 --> 00:13:07,000 I'd put colored chalk on my cheeks. 195 00:13:08,724 --> 00:13:11,241 I always loved beauty. I always loved makeup. 196 00:13:11,275 --> 00:13:13,172 I was definitely the most rebellious 197 00:13:13,206 --> 00:13:14,896 out of all of the girls. 198 00:13:14,931 --> 00:13:16,793 And I kind of wore down my parents, 199 00:13:16,827 --> 00:13:20,275 eventually causing them to leave the Amish lifestyle. 200 00:13:21,724 --> 00:13:23,448 I feel like this was such an extreme 201 00:13:23,482 --> 00:13:27,000 that I wanted to go to the opposite extreme 202 00:13:27,034 --> 00:13:29,103 and be as glamorous as possible. 203 00:13:31,206 --> 00:13:33,758 My life is entirely different now 204 00:13:33,793 --> 00:13:35,379 than from the way that I was raised, 205 00:13:35,413 --> 00:13:38,241 and it's completely on purpose. [chuckles] 206 00:13:38,275 --> 00:13:41,689 [upbeat music playing] 207 00:13:41,724 --> 00:13:43,172 [singer] ♪ Hey! Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 208 00:13:43,206 --> 00:13:44,172 ♪ Oh ♪ 209 00:13:44,206 --> 00:13:46,241 [Shekinah] Let's get some gold leafing in here. 210 00:13:46,275 --> 00:13:47,931 This is full of antioxidants 211 00:13:47,965 --> 00:13:49,896 to give you a nice glow for tonight. 212 00:13:49,931 --> 00:13:53,413 Co-hosting events is a side hustle. 213 00:13:53,448 --> 00:13:55,724 I have my own business. 214 00:13:55,758 --> 00:13:57,793 I'm an aesthetician 215 00:13:57,827 --> 00:13:59,344 and I've been licensed for over 20 years. 216 00:13:59,379 --> 00:14:01,310 It feels really messy 217 00:14:01,344 --> 00:14:03,068 but it actually peels off really clean. 218 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:06,724 I came to LA 13 years ago. 219 00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:08,344 I ended up here by chance. 220 00:14:09,310 --> 00:14:11,758 And the longer that I've lived in LA, 221 00:14:11,793 --> 00:14:13,965 the more LA I've become. 222 00:14:18,103 --> 00:14:19,275 [knocks on door] 223 00:14:20,344 --> 00:14:21,827 -[man] Hey. -Hi. 224 00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,103 -How are you? -[man] How are you, babe? 225 00:14:23,137 --> 00:14:24,758 -Hi, babe. -Hi. 226 00:14:24,793 --> 00:14:27,275 But, at heart, I still have 227 00:14:27,310 --> 00:14:29,586 that small town girl mentality. 228 00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:32,137 I found my core group of friends. 229 00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:33,655 We have a lot of the same values. 230 00:14:33,689 --> 00:14:35,758 Actually, none of us are from LA. 231 00:14:35,793 --> 00:14:38,586 I'm so happy to see all of you guys in one place. 232 00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:41,275 These are people that I talk to on a daily basis 233 00:14:41,310 --> 00:14:43,344 and I really value their opinions. 234 00:14:43,379 --> 00:14:44,793 -Cheers. -Oh, yes. 235 00:14:44,827 --> 00:14:46,241 Cheers. 236 00:14:47,827 --> 00:14:49,586 Thanks, Josh, for hosting the... Our get-together. 237 00:14:49,620 --> 00:14:51,758 -Oh, how have you been? -Good. 238 00:14:51,793 --> 00:14:53,620 So much has been going on. 239 00:14:54,448 --> 00:14:56,620 [Shawna] How are you and your man? 240 00:14:56,655 --> 00:14:58,310 [Shekinah] So good. 241 00:14:58,344 --> 00:15:00,000 You guys are gonna love him. 242 00:15:00,034 --> 00:15:01,965 He's like really down to earth. 243 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:03,448 He... Our connection is amazing. 244 00:15:03,482 --> 00:15:05,379 For now. 245 00:15:06,344 --> 00:15:07,310 [Dan] Yeah. 246 00:15:09,379 --> 00:15:11,275 You've been with a lot of [bleep]. 247 00:15:11,310 --> 00:15:12,827 [laughter] 248 00:15:12,862 --> 00:15:14,517 Thanks, Dan. 249 00:15:14,551 --> 00:15:18,000 I just had a series of toxic relationships. 250 00:15:18,034 --> 00:15:20,379 I was starting to think that maybe I would never find 251 00:15:20,413 --> 00:15:22,344 the right person for me, 252 00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:24,827 and that's when I met Sarper. 253 00:15:24,862 --> 00:15:27,827 [singer] ♪ Say what I want Keep dreamin' out loud ♪ 254 00:15:27,862 --> 00:15:30,034 [Shekinah] My boyfriend's name is Sarper. 255 00:15:30,068 --> 00:15:31,517 He's 43 years old. 256 00:15:31,551 --> 00:15:33,034 And he lives in Istanbul, Tuürkiye. 257 00:15:35,862 --> 00:15:39,379 [Shekinah] Sarper is a model and a personal trainer. 258 00:15:39,413 --> 00:15:43,965 He's just the most stunning man I've ever seen. 259 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,586 Baby. Good morning from Istanbul. 260 00:15:48,965 --> 00:15:52,068 [Shekinah] I went to Tuürkiye last year with a girlfriend. 261 00:15:52,103 --> 00:15:53,344 I downloaded a dating app 262 00:15:53,379 --> 00:15:55,517 to see what Turkish men are like. 263 00:15:56,551 --> 00:15:58,689 You know how people usually say like, 264 00:15:58,724 --> 00:15:59,896 "You had me at hello,"? 265 00:16:01,068 --> 00:16:03,068 Sarper had me at highlighter. [chuckles] 266 00:16:03,103 --> 00:16:04,896 He was wearing a highlighter 267 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:06,724 on our first date and I noticed it 268 00:16:06,758 --> 00:16:08,241 down the bridge of his nose and I was like, 269 00:16:08,275 --> 00:16:10,482 "This man is wearing makeup. 270 00:16:10,517 --> 00:16:11,551 He's wearing makeup on a date with me." 271 00:16:11,586 --> 00:16:13,275 That is so cute. 272 00:16:13,310 --> 00:16:14,896 [speaks Turkish] 273 00:16:14,931 --> 00:16:16,103 What are you saying? 274 00:16:16,137 --> 00:16:18,379 Now, you have to translate. 275 00:16:18,413 --> 00:16:19,931 -No. -Yes. 276 00:16:19,965 --> 00:16:21,896 -I forgot what I said. -Oh, my God. 277 00:16:23,103 --> 00:16:26,206 After two really great dates with Sarper, I went home, 278 00:16:26,241 --> 00:16:28,862 but I kept thinking about the connection that we had, 279 00:16:28,896 --> 00:16:30,758 so two and a half months later, 280 00:16:30,793 --> 00:16:32,448 I flew back to Tuürkiye 281 00:16:32,482 --> 00:16:34,241 to spend a whole week with Sarper. 282 00:16:36,827 --> 00:16:38,827 First meal with my baby. 283 00:16:38,862 --> 00:16:42,241 He is just everything that I've looked for. 284 00:16:42,275 --> 00:16:45,379 He's sweet. He's thoughtful. He's really caring. 285 00:16:45,413 --> 00:16:48,896 And our sex life is just like out of this world. 286 00:16:48,931 --> 00:16:49,827 It's insane. 287 00:16:51,620 --> 00:16:52,620 It is so good. 288 00:16:54,724 --> 00:16:56,000 [chuckles] 289 00:16:57,896 --> 00:17:00,965 My attraction and connection with Sarper 290 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:05,068 is so strong that I am willing to leave this entire life 291 00:17:05,103 --> 00:17:08,310 that I've built in Los Angeles to go and be with him. 292 00:17:08,344 --> 00:17:09,550 I don't know. 293 00:17:09,586 --> 00:17:11,448 There's just so many things that are so special about him. 294 00:17:11,482 --> 00:17:12,827 I mean, how long have you known him? 295 00:17:12,862 --> 00:17:14,344 [Shekinah] For like five months. 296 00:17:15,413 --> 00:17:17,000 -Yeah. -[Josh] That's crazy. 297 00:17:17,034 --> 00:17:18,792 I mean, I haven't known him for very long 298 00:17:18,827 --> 00:17:21,205 but that's one reason to go, you know? 299 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:24,586 Sarper and I talked a lot about the different options 300 00:17:24,619 --> 00:17:26,619 that we had to be together, 301 00:17:26,655 --> 00:17:29,655 and we landed on me moving to Tuürkiye as the easiest one. 302 00:17:29,689 --> 00:17:31,862 My daughter's off at boarding school 303 00:17:31,896 --> 00:17:34,310 and you can't really get to know somebody 304 00:17:34,344 --> 00:17:35,793 just on vacations, 305 00:17:35,827 --> 00:17:37,448 so you have to actually live with them 306 00:17:37,482 --> 00:17:39,206 to really get to know them. 307 00:17:39,241 --> 00:17:41,310 I wanna be all in, you know? 308 00:17:41,344 --> 00:17:43,275 That's kind of just my personality. 309 00:17:43,310 --> 00:17:46,517 I know, but not all the relationships in the past 310 00:17:46,551 --> 00:17:50,172 have gone as smoothly as they could have. 311 00:17:50,206 --> 00:17:51,275 I know. 312 00:17:53,896 --> 00:17:55,827 Shekinah's track record with men 313 00:17:55,862 --> 00:17:58,965 has been a little bit iffy. 314 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,517 I am concerned 315 00:18:01,551 --> 00:18:04,620 that if she's gonna get into a relationship 316 00:18:04,655 --> 00:18:07,241 where she's in a different country, 317 00:18:07,275 --> 00:18:10,068 there's no way to come in 318 00:18:10,103 --> 00:18:13,000 and help her through any kind of situation 319 00:18:13,034 --> 00:18:14,241 that she might be in. 320 00:18:15,586 --> 00:18:19,379 I feel like of all the guys that she's been with, 321 00:18:19,413 --> 00:18:20,862 he's not controlling or possessive. 322 00:18:20,896 --> 00:18:22,068 He's not trying to change her. 323 00:18:22,103 --> 00:18:25,275 Well, I don't know about that. 324 00:18:25,310 --> 00:18:29,241 He told Shekinah that she has to weigh a certain weight. 325 00:18:29,275 --> 00:18:30,620 -What? -Shekinah? 326 00:18:30,655 --> 00:18:34,965 Told Shekinah that she has to change her makeup. 327 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:36,758 He told Shekinah that she has to change her hair color. 328 00:18:36,793 --> 00:18:38,586 -Oh, my God. -He is controlling then. 329 00:18:38,620 --> 00:18:40,862 I'm training with a trainer here 330 00:18:40,896 --> 00:18:44,620 and my goal has been to gain muscle and to get bigger. 331 00:18:44,655 --> 00:18:46,551 And since I met Sarper, he is like... 332 00:18:46,586 --> 00:18:48,034 Likes the opposite aesthetic. 333 00:18:48,068 --> 00:18:50,103 So he's just been telling me, you know, 334 00:18:50,137 --> 00:18:51,862 like, "You should look more lean. 335 00:18:51,896 --> 00:18:54,206 And 128 would be perfect for your height." 336 00:18:54,241 --> 00:18:55,758 [Josh] But the problem is it starts with one. 337 00:18:55,793 --> 00:18:57,034 -[Shawna] Yeah. -When... Like the weight, 338 00:18:57,068 --> 00:18:58,206 then the makeup, then the hair. 339 00:18:58,241 --> 00:19:00,310 Then it's the clothes and... It's too much. 340 00:19:03,724 --> 00:19:06,310 I've had some, you know, really bad experiences 341 00:19:06,344 --> 00:19:07,586 in relationships 342 00:19:07,620 --> 00:19:09,793 and it's definitely taught me 343 00:19:09,827 --> 00:19:13,172 some really serious and valuable lessons. 344 00:19:13,206 --> 00:19:15,758 But there's so many things about Sarper that lets me know 345 00:19:15,793 --> 00:19:18,413 that he is different from my exes 346 00:19:18,448 --> 00:19:22,241 and I know that this is a once-in-a-lifetime connection. 347 00:19:22,275 --> 00:19:23,793 And if I don't take this risk, 348 00:19:23,827 --> 00:19:26,241 I may never find this again. 349 00:19:26,275 --> 00:19:29,758 So it's something that I have to do. 350 00:19:34,103 --> 00:19:37,137 [upbeat music playing] 351 00:19:47,931 --> 00:19:49,448 [in Spanish] 352 00:19:49,482 --> 00:19:51,000 [in Spanish] 353 00:19:52,379 --> 00:19:53,586 My friends, Sanja and Lizette, 354 00:19:53,620 --> 00:19:55,310 went back to New York a few days ago 355 00:19:55,344 --> 00:19:57,655 and I was really sad to say goodbye to them. 356 00:19:57,689 --> 00:19:59,793 But they really offered me some perspective 357 00:19:59,827 --> 00:20:03,241 on whether or not going through the fertility process 358 00:20:03,275 --> 00:20:05,758 right now is the best decision. 359 00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,586 [in Spanish] 360 00:20:08,620 --> 00:20:09,827 Hmm. 361 00:20:09,862 --> 00:20:11,931 [in Spanish] 362 00:20:11,965 --> 00:20:13,827 Today, we're going to see the same fertility doctor 363 00:20:13,862 --> 00:20:14,965 that we met with a year ago. 364 00:20:15,689 --> 00:20:18,000 At that time, he told me 365 00:20:18,034 --> 00:20:19,310 that the odds of me getting pregnant 366 00:20:19,344 --> 00:20:21,000 with my own eggs were very low. 367 00:20:23,275 --> 00:20:25,172 Yohan wanted to continue to try naturally, 368 00:20:26,275 --> 00:20:29,586 but after nine months with no success, 369 00:20:29,620 --> 00:20:31,344 we have to consider engaging science 370 00:20:31,379 --> 00:20:32,448 and using an egg donor. 371 00:20:33,965 --> 00:20:35,931 -Hi. How are you? -Hi. Good morning. 372 00:20:35,965 --> 00:20:36,965 [Daniele] Good to see you. 373 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:37,896 -[Yohan in Spanish] -[in Spanish] 374 00:20:37,931 --> 00:20:39,172 [in Spanish] 375 00:20:41,862 --> 00:20:45,068 [in Spanish] 376 00:20:45,103 --> 00:20:46,413 I'm doing good. 377 00:20:46,448 --> 00:20:49,310 I... Since the last time we spoke, 378 00:20:49,344 --> 00:20:50,896 I've tried to work 379 00:20:50,931 --> 00:20:52,517 on balancing my hormones naturally 380 00:20:52,551 --> 00:20:55,724 and see if that would help with the fertility process. 381 00:20:55,758 --> 00:20:57,758 So I changed my diet. 382 00:20:57,793 --> 00:21:00,724 But we haven't been successful in getting pregnant. 383 00:21:01,551 --> 00:21:03,551 So choosing a donor, 384 00:21:03,586 --> 00:21:05,241 what does that process look like? 385 00:21:05,275 --> 00:21:07,758 Okay. We have pictures of our donors. 386 00:21:07,793 --> 00:21:10,620 So what we do is we try to find someone 387 00:21:10,655 --> 00:21:12,000 that resembles to you. 388 00:21:12,034 --> 00:21:13,551 -Okay. -Okay? 389 00:21:13,586 --> 00:21:16,586 [in Spanish] 390 00:21:20,758 --> 00:21:24,724 [in Spanish] 391 00:21:24,758 --> 00:21:26,241 It's just gonna form the baby. 392 00:21:26,275 --> 00:21:28,034 But genetically speaking... 393 00:21:28,068 --> 00:21:33,137 [in Spanish] 394 00:21:35,724 --> 00:21:38,413 [in Spanish] 395 00:21:53,551 --> 00:21:54,551 [chuckles] 396 00:21:56,241 --> 00:21:57,241 So... 397 00:21:57,275 --> 00:21:58,517 [Dr. Rojas speaking] 398 00:21:58,551 --> 00:22:00,206 I don't... I don't know. Like this-- 399 00:22:02,379 --> 00:22:04,310 [laughter] 400 00:22:04,344 --> 00:22:07,206 -I'm gray. So I guess... -Okay. Okay. 401 00:22:09,965 --> 00:22:12,448 He's asking how do you want the donor to be? Like... 402 00:22:12,482 --> 00:22:14,551 Well, I want her to be Harvard-educated. 403 00:22:14,586 --> 00:22:15,655 -I want her to be-- -[Dr. Rojas] Wow. 404 00:22:15,689 --> 00:22:17,103 Yeah. I have very high expectations. 405 00:22:17,137 --> 00:22:18,724 I care less about what she looks like 406 00:22:18,758 --> 00:22:20,241 and more about what she does for a living. 407 00:22:20,275 --> 00:22:22,103 Okay. Okay. 408 00:22:22,137 --> 00:22:23,137 [laughter] 409 00:22:23,172 --> 00:22:26,310 So the process itself, I'm obviously being 410 00:22:26,344 --> 00:22:28,137 inseminated or whatever you call it. 411 00:22:28,172 --> 00:22:29,413 -Like-- -A transfer of the embryo. 412 00:22:29,448 --> 00:22:31,103 [Daniele] Yeah. A transfer of the embryo. 413 00:22:31,137 --> 00:22:32,275 [Dr. Rojas] This is how it works. 414 00:22:32,310 --> 00:22:34,034 We extract the eggs. 415 00:22:34,068 --> 00:22:36,068 That's the day that we need his sperm. 416 00:22:36,103 --> 00:22:37,137 -[Daniele] Okay. -All right? 417 00:22:37,172 --> 00:22:39,275 So, probably, you're gonna have six 418 00:22:39,310 --> 00:22:41,689 or eight embryos that we could work with. 419 00:22:41,724 --> 00:22:45,827 [Dr. Rojas speaking] 420 00:22:47,172 --> 00:22:49,724 I just wait to get pregnant? 421 00:22:49,758 --> 00:22:52,448 How long after today would we be able 422 00:22:52,482 --> 00:22:54,482 to start this process? 423 00:22:54,517 --> 00:22:55,965 [Dr. Rojas] If you are... 424 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,758 Agree with that donor, we could do that in 15 days. 425 00:22:58,793 --> 00:23:01,344 Okay. 426 00:23:01,379 --> 00:23:03,172 [Dr. Rojas] If we start the process today, 427 00:23:03,206 --> 00:23:06,517 the rate of that success, because of her age, 428 00:23:06,551 --> 00:23:08,689 is around 65% to 70%. 429 00:23:08,724 --> 00:23:10,862 I mean, I would suggest to do it fast 430 00:23:10,896 --> 00:23:13,034 because the longer she waits, 431 00:23:13,068 --> 00:23:15,620 the rate will become lower with all... 432 00:23:15,655 --> 00:23:17,103 Throughout those years. 433 00:23:18,310 --> 00:23:21,034 I had gotten the paperwork around cost for me before. 434 00:23:21,068 --> 00:23:23,172 It was $10,500. 435 00:23:23,206 --> 00:23:24,862 So a part of that, 436 00:23:24,896 --> 00:23:26,758 I think it's a thousand for that... 437 00:23:26,793 --> 00:23:28,517 For the donor. 438 00:23:28,551 --> 00:23:30,965 So $10,500 for my process 439 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:34,172 and then I also have to pay the donor $1,000? 440 00:23:34,206 --> 00:23:36,482 -Okay. -[in Spanish] 441 00:23:38,689 --> 00:23:42,448 I don't have $11,000 earmarked for this right now. 442 00:23:42,482 --> 00:23:44,448 So we have to figure out a way to pay for it, 443 00:23:44,482 --> 00:23:46,137 which basically means that I have to figure out 444 00:23:46,172 --> 00:23:47,620 a way to pay for it. 445 00:23:47,655 --> 00:23:50,172 But now that I know how real this possibility is, 446 00:23:50,206 --> 00:23:52,310 it's making me really nervous. 447 00:23:52,344 --> 00:23:54,827 Yohan and I have some fundamental differences 448 00:23:54,862 --> 00:23:56,379 when it comes to raising a family. 449 00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:58,206 So it's gonna be a hard 450 00:23:58,241 --> 00:23:59,310 conversation that we have to have. 451 00:24:08,931 --> 00:24:11,206 Yeah. I'm excited. I'm nervous. 452 00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:12,517 I'm all of the emotions. 453 00:24:16,586 --> 00:24:17,793 But I'm here for you. 454 00:24:17,827 --> 00:24:19,344 Why won't you just let me in and let me be 455 00:24:19,379 --> 00:24:20,758 a part of your life? 456 00:24:24,482 --> 00:24:26,931 I don't wanna be in a relationship with secrets. 457 00:24:26,965 --> 00:24:28,551 Eventually, that's gonna be the demise of it. 458 00:24:28,586 --> 00:24:29,862 It just is. 459 00:24:32,034 --> 00:24:33,413 [Dan speaking] 460 00:24:33,448 --> 00:24:35,413 -[Shekinah] Mmm-hmm. -But I want you to know 461 00:24:35,448 --> 00:24:38,551 like what I really think about you. 462 00:24:38,586 --> 00:24:41,586 I really still do love you. 463 00:24:41,620 --> 00:24:43,206 We should be together. 464 00:24:48,379 --> 00:24:50,103 [dramatic music playing] 465 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,344 [Wayne] I just had to leave just because... 466 00:25:31,379 --> 00:25:33,000 Like emotions are just everywhere. 467 00:25:33,034 --> 00:25:34,413 Like I'm concerned about business. 468 00:25:34,448 --> 00:25:36,862 I'm concerned about Holly. 469 00:25:50,103 --> 00:25:51,689 Thanks for coming back. 470 00:25:52,896 --> 00:25:54,724 I just needed to calm down. That's all. 471 00:26:00,655 --> 00:26:01,793 [Holly] Wait. 472 00:26:03,275 --> 00:26:05,413 You just don't care anymore? 473 00:26:07,137 --> 00:26:09,275 You're just done with me for today? 474 00:26:10,310 --> 00:26:12,068 No, no, baby. 475 00:26:12,103 --> 00:26:14,137 I'm just like over everything. That's all. 476 00:26:15,517 --> 00:26:17,275 [Holly sighs] 477 00:26:17,310 --> 00:26:18,896 [Wayne] When I was dating Holly, 478 00:26:18,931 --> 00:26:21,655 Holly told me that she would never be 479 00:26:21,689 --> 00:26:23,896 with someone that's financially struggling. 480 00:26:23,931 --> 00:26:27,758 So I do think it was a good idea 481 00:26:27,793 --> 00:26:30,448 to tell Holly about my financial situation 482 00:26:30,482 --> 00:26:32,793 because I thought that she wouldn't wanna be with me. 483 00:26:34,034 --> 00:26:36,310 So she's just living in the dark, 484 00:26:36,344 --> 00:26:37,827 not knowing what's happening. 485 00:26:40,793 --> 00:26:42,517 I feel helpless and feeling helpless 486 00:26:42,551 --> 00:26:44,103 is a really hard way to feel. 487 00:26:47,172 --> 00:26:48,379 That's not part of a partnership. 488 00:26:48,413 --> 00:26:50,000 [Wayne speaking] 489 00:26:50,034 --> 00:26:51,793 I don't want you to get over it yourself. 490 00:26:57,310 --> 00:26:59,137 But I'm here for you. Why won't you just let me in 491 00:26:59,172 --> 00:27:01,206 and let be a part of your life? 492 00:27:04,724 --> 00:27:05,689 I don't wanna be a part of your business. 493 00:27:05,724 --> 00:27:07,000 I wanna be your wife. 494 00:27:09,965 --> 00:27:11,758 [Holly] All of a sudden, like I can see that 495 00:27:11,793 --> 00:27:14,344 it's not like he's being mean or cold. 496 00:27:14,379 --> 00:27:17,068 It's that he's feeling really emotional 497 00:27:17,103 --> 00:27:19,586 and that he does not know how to express himself. 498 00:27:19,620 --> 00:27:21,241 But like I don't wanna be 499 00:27:21,275 --> 00:27:23,000 in a relationship with secrets. 500 00:27:23,034 --> 00:27:24,793 Eventually, that's gonna be the demise of it. 501 00:27:24,827 --> 00:27:26,068 It just is. 502 00:27:26,103 --> 00:27:28,206 We're gonna have to talk about this before we get married. 503 00:27:28,241 --> 00:27:29,689 It has to be addressed. 504 00:27:32,034 --> 00:27:34,137 Just give me... Give me... Just give me two minutes. 505 00:27:34,172 --> 00:27:35,724 Two minutes alone? 506 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,517 [mellow music playing] 507 00:27:54,206 --> 00:27:56,689 Shekinah, I wanna talk to you for a minute. 508 00:27:57,172 --> 00:27:58,137 Come with me. 509 00:28:08,034 --> 00:28:11,758 I know you're having your plan to go to Tuürkiye, 510 00:28:11,793 --> 00:28:14,068 but I just wanted to be able to talk to you 511 00:28:14,103 --> 00:28:15,275 just one on one. 512 00:28:15,310 --> 00:28:16,448 Mmm-hmm. 513 00:28:18,344 --> 00:28:21,068 [Dan speaking] 514 00:28:39,103 --> 00:28:40,620 You know, we've been through like 515 00:28:40,655 --> 00:28:43,241 a lot of things in the past seven years. 516 00:28:44,275 --> 00:28:45,896 Like I really want you to be happy. 517 00:28:45,931 --> 00:28:47,862 -Mmm-hmm. -But I want you to know 518 00:28:47,896 --> 00:28:50,103 like what I really think about you. 519 00:28:53,965 --> 00:28:57,482 Uh, so, you know, we... 520 00:28:59,379 --> 00:29:00,965 Like I... 521 00:29:02,965 --> 00:29:05,000 I really still do love you 522 00:29:06,241 --> 00:29:07,448 and... 523 00:29:09,344 --> 00:29:12,896 I just think that we should be together. 524 00:29:17,241 --> 00:29:19,965 Dan, he is the perfect catch. 525 00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:24,034 He's so successful, so sweet, so charming, 526 00:29:24,068 --> 00:29:26,896 and I know that he would be a great partner. 527 00:29:27,793 --> 00:29:30,000 I know that we have like this bond 528 00:29:30,034 --> 00:29:32,206 and this really like emotional attachment, 529 00:29:32,241 --> 00:29:34,724 and that makes it like very special. 530 00:29:34,758 --> 00:29:38,275 And you don't find that every day. 531 00:29:39,310 --> 00:29:40,482 [Shekinah] We have an emotional connection-- 532 00:29:40,517 --> 00:29:41,862 We do have an emotional connection, yeah. 533 00:29:41,896 --> 00:29:43,965 but it's more of a friendship. 534 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:46,103 It doesn't mean we need to be together. 535 00:29:48,413 --> 00:29:50,586 You know how I can treat you. 536 00:29:50,620 --> 00:29:53,551 We already tried to date, 537 00:29:53,586 --> 00:29:55,965 but it didn't feel right for me. 538 00:30:00,551 --> 00:30:02,379 [Dan] I'm not wishing that this relationship 539 00:30:02,413 --> 00:30:05,103 that you're starting with him is not gonna work... 540 00:30:05,137 --> 00:30:06,103 Yeah. 541 00:30:06,137 --> 00:30:10,275 but I hope that's gonna open up your mind... 542 00:30:15,482 --> 00:30:16,724 -in a different way towards me. -Yeah. 543 00:30:16,758 --> 00:30:18,448 I can't even think about that right now. 544 00:30:18,482 --> 00:30:19,448 -There's no way. -[Dan] I know. I know. 545 00:30:19,482 --> 00:30:21,448 -I'm in love with Sarper. -[Dan] I know. 546 00:30:23,482 --> 00:30:25,310 [Shekinah] But I respect what you're saying 547 00:30:25,344 --> 00:30:27,379 and I understand how you feel 548 00:30:27,413 --> 00:30:29,344 and you'll always be a big part of my life. 549 00:30:29,379 --> 00:30:30,827 [Dan] You too. 550 00:30:30,862 --> 00:30:34,034 Thank you for always being there for me. 551 00:30:34,068 --> 00:30:35,517 I love you so much. 552 00:30:36,344 --> 00:30:37,482 I love you. 553 00:30:39,068 --> 00:30:40,275 [Dan] That's so sweet. 554 00:30:41,206 --> 00:30:42,379 Aw. 555 00:30:43,517 --> 00:30:46,206 I definitely worry that I'm making another mistake, 556 00:30:46,241 --> 00:30:48,034 just like all the other ones that I have 557 00:30:48,068 --> 00:30:50,068 with all the wrong guys I've chosen. 558 00:30:50,103 --> 00:30:52,448 But I'm trying to look on the positive side of this 559 00:30:52,482 --> 00:30:54,275 and believe that Sarper is different 560 00:30:54,310 --> 00:30:56,482 and that this is gonna be the relationship 561 00:30:56,517 --> 00:30:58,310 that works out for me. 562 00:30:58,344 --> 00:31:01,448 [Dan] If things are not going in the way 563 00:31:01,482 --> 00:31:04,724 that you thought, you know, I'm still here. 564 00:31:04,758 --> 00:31:06,931 And I will always be here for you. 565 00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:15,448 I hope that you understand, it's hard for me to trust you. 566 00:31:16,379 --> 00:31:17,586 [Brandan] She hasn't been giving me 567 00:31:17,620 --> 00:31:19,448 the reassurance that I needed. 568 00:31:19,482 --> 00:31:20,793 That's still on my mind. 569 00:31:21,344 --> 00:31:22,344 Are we okay? 570 00:31:27,241 --> 00:31:29,310 [dramatic music playing] 571 00:31:45,310 --> 00:31:46,379 -Hey, Lolo. -Hi. 572 00:31:49,517 --> 00:31:50,862 Good morning. 573 00:31:50,896 --> 00:31:51,793 [in foreign language] 574 00:31:51,827 --> 00:31:52,724 Oh. 575 00:31:54,344 --> 00:31:56,275 Bye-bye. 576 00:31:56,310 --> 00:31:59,586 [Mary] Last night, when I have anxiety attack, 577 00:31:59,620 --> 00:32:01,862 I feel ashamed. 578 00:32:03,896 --> 00:32:05,896 I go home. 579 00:32:08,586 --> 00:32:10,172 And just sleep. 580 00:32:10,206 --> 00:32:11,793 [Brandan] How do we get in? 581 00:32:11,827 --> 00:32:14,172 -Through the... Okay. -In the gate, yeah. 582 00:32:14,206 --> 00:32:16,172 [Mary] Because of my past, 583 00:32:16,206 --> 00:32:19,275 I feel like everyone will leave me 584 00:32:19,310 --> 00:32:21,068 no matter what I do. 585 00:32:22,620 --> 00:32:25,172 But Brandan doesn't leave me. 586 00:32:29,206 --> 00:32:32,068 [Mary speaking] 587 00:32:32,103 --> 00:32:34,862 [Brandan] Wow. Big open space here in the middle. 588 00:32:34,896 --> 00:32:36,413 I like the trees and the plants. 589 00:32:36,448 --> 00:32:37,517 They're very pretty. 590 00:32:37,551 --> 00:32:39,034 You even got a basketball court. 591 00:32:39,068 --> 00:32:41,103 -[Mary] Mmm-hmm. -[Brandan] That's cool. 592 00:32:42,068 --> 00:32:45,586 Today, I feel a little bit better. 593 00:32:45,620 --> 00:32:47,551 And my high school memory 594 00:32:47,586 --> 00:32:49,827 is the most happy moment in my life. 595 00:32:49,862 --> 00:32:52,000 I meet my friends. 596 00:32:52,034 --> 00:32:53,586 I showed my talents there. 597 00:32:53,620 --> 00:32:56,620 So I want to share it to him. 598 00:32:58,137 --> 00:32:59,689 And that's the narra tree. 599 00:32:59,724 --> 00:33:02,413 That's the very, very old tree. 600 00:33:02,448 --> 00:33:06,965 That's one of our friends' hang out place. 601 00:33:08,034 --> 00:33:09,448 That's the church. 602 00:33:09,482 --> 00:33:10,896 -[Brandan] Oh, yeah. -[Mary] Mmm-hmm. 603 00:33:10,931 --> 00:33:12,931 It's connected to the school 604 00:33:12,965 --> 00:33:15,068 because it is a Catholic school. 605 00:33:16,689 --> 00:33:18,827 We do mass there before our class. 606 00:33:18,862 --> 00:33:19,965 Mmm-hmm. 607 00:33:24,379 --> 00:33:28,827 I know we left things off pretty iffy last night. 608 00:33:31,275 --> 00:33:33,413 -Are we okay? -Yes. 609 00:33:33,448 --> 00:33:35,241 We're okay now. Don't worry. 610 00:33:35,275 --> 00:33:36,862 I'm okay. I feel good. 611 00:33:40,172 --> 00:33:43,344 It's nice that she wants me to be a part 612 00:33:43,379 --> 00:33:45,241 of her childhood memories 613 00:33:45,275 --> 00:33:47,620 and show me her old high school. 614 00:33:48,793 --> 00:33:50,931 But we can't pretend like nothing happened and 615 00:33:50,965 --> 00:33:53,689 she hasn't been giving me 616 00:33:53,724 --> 00:33:55,172 the reassurance that I needed. 617 00:33:56,103 --> 00:33:58,448 That's still on my mind. I just... 618 00:33:58,482 --> 00:34:01,241 I want us to be genuinely okay again. 619 00:34:03,344 --> 00:34:05,068 -Are we really okay? -Mmm-hmm. 620 00:34:06,586 --> 00:34:08,000 -You sure? -Yes. 621 00:34:09,379 --> 00:34:12,655 But just I hope that you understand, 622 00:34:12,688 --> 00:34:17,896 it's hard for me to trust you like now, today. 623 00:34:17,931 --> 00:34:19,413 Just give me time 624 00:34:19,447 --> 00:34:22,862 because I have this feeling 625 00:34:22,896 --> 00:34:24,516 of no matter how I try, 626 00:34:24,551 --> 00:34:27,206 everyone will leave me no matter what I do. 627 00:34:29,862 --> 00:34:32,241 I completely understand, baby. 628 00:34:32,275 --> 00:34:34,068 I've had people leave me too. 629 00:34:35,724 --> 00:34:38,516 And I know you can't like automatically 630 00:34:38,551 --> 00:34:40,172 just flip a switch and just be like, "Okay, yes, 631 00:34:40,206 --> 00:34:41,757 -I trust him right away." -Yeah. 632 00:34:41,793 --> 00:34:44,344 But I will try harder to trust you. 633 00:34:45,585 --> 00:34:46,585 Thank you. 634 00:34:48,585 --> 00:34:52,241 That is something that I really need. 635 00:34:53,862 --> 00:34:55,862 Just know that I love you. 636 00:34:55,896 --> 00:34:59,862 You are so perfect and the man that I want. 637 00:34:59,896 --> 00:35:02,724 And I really I want my future with you. 638 00:35:03,517 --> 00:35:05,413 -Are you okay? -Yeah. 639 00:35:05,448 --> 00:35:07,758 [chuckles] Why you get teary-eyed? 640 00:35:07,793 --> 00:35:09,758 -That meant a lot to me. -Mmm-hmm. 641 00:35:12,172 --> 00:35:13,896 You mean a lot to me. 642 00:35:15,827 --> 00:35:17,620 I love you so much. 643 00:35:17,655 --> 00:35:19,655 I love you just as much, baby. 644 00:35:20,965 --> 00:35:22,551 -Thank you. -Don't cry. 645 00:35:22,586 --> 00:35:23,896 That means a lot to me. 646 00:35:23,931 --> 00:35:25,482 Thank you for reassuring me. 647 00:35:25,517 --> 00:35:27,620 Don't cry. [chuckles] 648 00:35:27,655 --> 00:35:29,241 I'm trying not to. 649 00:35:29,275 --> 00:35:30,551 [chuckling] 650 00:35:32,862 --> 00:35:36,931 The fact that she's willing to try and trust me, 651 00:35:36,965 --> 00:35:40,103 I really needed her to say those words 652 00:35:40,137 --> 00:35:44,862 because, to me, that is everything. 653 00:35:44,896 --> 00:35:47,482 [dramatic music playing] 654 00:35:53,793 --> 00:35:56,896 [in Spanish] 655 00:35:57,482 --> 00:36:00,551 [in Spanish] 656 00:36:02,551 --> 00:36:06,448 [in Spanish] 657 00:36:18,137 --> 00:36:20,482 [upbeat music playing] 658 00:36:25,103 --> 00:36:28,482 [singer singing in Spanish] 659 00:36:34,344 --> 00:36:36,758 Earlier today, we visited a fertility clinic 660 00:36:36,793 --> 00:36:39,931 to learn what the donor egg process looks like. 661 00:36:39,965 --> 00:36:41,655 [in Spanish] 662 00:36:42,827 --> 00:36:49,655 [in Spanish] 663 00:36:49,689 --> 00:36:51,793 [Daniele] It's crazy to think that we could be pregnant 664 00:36:51,827 --> 00:36:52,965 in a matter of weeks. 665 00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:55,413 But as I hear that, now I have like this reel 666 00:36:55,448 --> 00:36:57,103 going through my mind, and I'm nervous 667 00:36:57,137 --> 00:36:58,827 and I'm not sure if we're ready, 668 00:36:58,862 --> 00:37:00,620 because we're gonna have to make sure 669 00:37:00,655 --> 00:37:03,620 that we're on the same page to have a baby. 670 00:37:05,137 --> 00:37:08,517 Yeah. [in Spanish] 671 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,448 [in Spanish] 672 00:37:24,827 --> 00:37:26,344 If we're not on the same page, 673 00:37:26,379 --> 00:37:28,103 it doesn't matter how much money we have. 674 00:37:31,310 --> 00:37:35,310 [in Spanish] 675 00:37:42,896 --> 00:37:45,827 [in Spanish] 676 00:37:45,862 --> 00:37:48,448 [in Spanish] 677 00:37:49,310 --> 00:37:50,655 [in Spanish] 678 00:37:51,137 --> 00:37:52,724 [in Spanish] 679 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,137 Yohan has twelve nieces and nephews, 680 00:37:56,172 --> 00:37:58,551 so he's not ignorant to what is involved 681 00:37:58,586 --> 00:38:00,137 with keeping a child alive, 682 00:38:00,172 --> 00:38:03,275 but I don't think that he knows 683 00:38:03,310 --> 00:38:07,931 what's necessary to allow a child to thrive. 684 00:38:07,965 --> 00:38:09,896 What kind of education do we want them to have? 685 00:38:09,931 --> 00:38:12,206 What kind of spiritual practice are they going to have? 686 00:38:12,241 --> 00:38:14,344 Kids need structure and boundaries. 687 00:38:14,379 --> 00:38:18,689 And I think it's gonna be hard for us to bridge that gap. 688 00:38:19,965 --> 00:38:23,758 [in Spanish] 689 00:38:33,724 --> 00:38:35,862 [in Spanish] 690 00:38:35,896 --> 00:38:37,448 [in Spanish] 691 00:38:40,931 --> 00:38:44,344 [in Spanish] 692 00:38:53,586 --> 00:38:57,344 [in Spanish] 693 00:38:57,379 --> 00:38:59,275 I'm more concerned that 694 00:39:00,758 --> 00:39:05,275 we don't think that the same things are important. 695 00:39:12,103 --> 00:39:13,931 [in Spanish] 696 00:39:18,034 --> 00:39:19,241 [in Spanish] 697 00:39:20,103 --> 00:39:23,068 [in Spanish] 698 00:39:41,137 --> 00:39:44,103 [in Spanish] 699 00:39:46,103 --> 00:39:50,275 [in Spanish] 700 00:39:54,655 --> 00:39:57,586 [in Spanish] 701 00:40:09,413 --> 00:40:12,413 [in Spanish] 702 00:40:33,137 --> 00:40:35,482 [in Spanish] 703 00:40:35,965 --> 00:40:37,172 [sighs] 704 00:40:39,620 --> 00:40:41,172 I'm frustrated 705 00:40:41,206 --> 00:40:44,517 that we aren't understanding each other. 706 00:40:44,551 --> 00:40:48,103 And that's where I'm really scared. 707 00:40:48,137 --> 00:40:50,482 How are we going to be able to raise a kid 708 00:40:50,517 --> 00:40:52,758 when we can't communicate? 709 00:40:54,206 --> 00:40:55,793 This is[bleep] up. 710 00:40:55,827 --> 00:40:57,655 Like I don't really know what to do. 711 00:40:59,931 --> 00:41:04,379 [in Spanish] 712 00:41:09,862 --> 00:41:12,827 [man] Next time on 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way. 713 00:41:12,862 --> 00:41:14,862 I don't think we're gonna have to pay 714 00:41:14,896 --> 00:41:16,448 for the bills next month. 715 00:41:16,482 --> 00:41:17,793 Is there any chance 716 00:41:17,827 --> 00:41:20,068 that we could ask for some help? 717 00:41:20,896 --> 00:41:22,655 I just don't want to ask help. 718 00:41:23,344 --> 00:41:24,827 We're in a hole right now. 719 00:41:24,862 --> 00:41:26,896 I just... [sniffles] 720 00:41:26,931 --> 00:41:28,344 [sighs] 721 00:41:29,586 --> 00:41:31,793 [in Turkish] 722 00:41:31,827 --> 00:41:33,862 [in Turkish] 723 00:41:33,896 --> 00:41:37,586 In my past, I've dated lots of... Lots of women. 724 00:41:38,793 --> 00:41:41,000 Shekinah is moving to Tuürkiye in a few days, 725 00:41:41,034 --> 00:41:43,310 and to keep Shekinah in my life, 726 00:41:43,344 --> 00:41:46,000 I have to leave that lifestyle behind. 727 00:41:46,827 --> 00:41:48,517 [in Turkish] 728 00:41:50,724 --> 00:41:52,689 [Kirsten speaking] 729 00:41:54,931 --> 00:41:56,551 You can't just be like, you know, 730 00:41:56,586 --> 00:41:58,034 you have three months to make a decision. 731 00:42:00,206 --> 00:42:01,517 [chuckles] 732 00:42:01,551 --> 00:42:02,862 [Kirsten speaking] 733 00:42:02,896 --> 00:42:04,551 'Cause you're saying... you're-- 734 00:42:04,586 --> 00:42:05,896 [Kirsten speaking] 735 00:42:11,172 --> 00:42:13,896 Since Yash left the conversation 736 00:42:13,931 --> 00:42:15,931 that we were trying to mend, 737 00:42:15,965 --> 00:42:17,965 I haven't talked to him. 738 00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:22,103 So I can only imagine what he's told his parents. 739 00:42:22,137 --> 00:42:25,379 [in foreign language] 740 00:42:25,413 --> 00:42:29,586 [in foreign language] 741 00:42:29,620 --> 00:42:31,068 [Kimberly] I won't live in this environment. 742 00:42:31,103 --> 00:42:32,758 I grew up in a toxic household. 743 00:42:32,793 --> 00:42:33,965 I'm not doing it again. 744 00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:37,620 [dramatic music playing]