1 00:00:36,983 --> 00:00:39,419 Dear Evan Hansen... 2 00:00:51,064 --> 00:00:54,368 ...today is going to be an amazing day, 3 00:00:54,467 --> 00:00:56,503 and here's why. 4 00:00:59,506 --> 00:01:04,044 Because today, all you have to do is just be yourself. 5 00:01:05,679 --> 00:01:08,448 But also confident. That's-that's important. 6 00:01:08,548 --> 00:01:10,250 And interesting. Easy to talk to. 7 00:01:10,351 --> 00:01:12,085 Approachable. But mostly just be yourself. 8 00:01:12,185 --> 00:01:13,820 You know, that's number one, obviously. Be yourself. 9 00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:15,755 But, like, a confident version of yourself, 10 00:01:15,855 --> 00:01:17,991 like, approachable and interesting 11 00:01:18,091 --> 00:01:19,693 and not weird or anxious or depressed. 12 00:01:19,793 --> 00:01:21,261 But you're not weird or anxious or depressed. 13 00:01:21,362 --> 00:01:22,963 I don't even know why you're bringing it up. 14 00:01:23,063 --> 00:01:24,298 You can't be scared to talk to other people. 15 00:01:24,398 --> 00:01:25,765 You said that you'd be better. 16 00:01:25,865 --> 00:01:26,733 You said this year would be different. 17 00:01:26,833 --> 00:01:27,867 You're overthinking it. 18 00:01:27,968 --> 00:01:29,337 Do you like having no friends? 19 00:01:29,437 --> 00:01:30,971 All you have to do is just be yourself. 20 00:01:31,071 --> 00:01:33,873 ♪ I've learned to slam on the brake ♪ 21 00:01:33,974 --> 00:01:37,577 ♪ Before I even turn the key ♪ 22 00:01:37,677 --> 00:01:40,647 ♪ Before I make the mistake ♪ 23 00:01:40,747 --> 00:01:43,950 ♪ Before I lead with the worst of me ♪ 24 00:01:44,050 --> 00:01:47,153 ♪ Give them no reason to stare ♪ 25 00:01:47,253 --> 00:01:50,757 ♪ No slipping up if you slip away ♪ 26 00:01:50,857 --> 00:01:54,027 ♪ So I got nothing to share ♪ 27 00:01:54,127 --> 00:01:57,197 ♪ No, I got nothing to say ♪ 28 00:01:57,298 --> 00:01:59,599 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun ♪ 29 00:01:59,699 --> 00:02:02,635 ♪ If you keep getting burned ♪ 30 00:02:04,137 --> 00:02:08,675 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun because you've learned ♪ 31 00:02:08,775 --> 00:02:12,579 ♪ Because you've learned ♪ 32 00:02:12,679 --> 00:02:15,081 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 33 00:02:15,181 --> 00:02:18,285 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 34 00:02:18,386 --> 00:02:21,988 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 35 00:02:22,088 --> 00:02:24,758 ♪ I'm waving through a window ♪ 36 00:02:24,858 --> 00:02:28,028 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 37 00:02:28,128 --> 00:02:32,265 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 38 00:02:32,366 --> 00:02:35,403 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 39 00:02:35,503 --> 00:02:38,171 ♪ I'm waving through a window ♪ 40 00:02:38,271 --> 00:02:39,839 ♪ Oh ♪ 41 00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:42,842 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 42 00:02:42,942 --> 00:02:47,680 ♪ Is anybody waving back at me? ♪ 43 00:02:57,991 --> 00:02:59,692 So you just didn't eat last night? 44 00:02:59,793 --> 00:03:01,561 I wasn't hungry. 45 00:03:01,661 --> 00:03:03,096 You're a senior in high school. 46 00:03:03,196 --> 00:03:04,731 You need to be able to order dinner for yourself. 47 00:03:04,831 --> 00:03:05,999 You can do it all online. 48 00:03:06,099 --> 00:03:07,867 You don't have to talk to anybody. 49 00:03:07,967 --> 00:03:09,537 Okay, well, that's not, that's not true, actually, though, 50 00:03:09,669 --> 00:03:11,305 because, um, the credit card's expired, so you have to meet 51 00:03:11,405 --> 00:03:13,273 the delivery person at the door, you know? 52 00:03:13,374 --> 00:03:14,674 You have to pay them with cash at the door. 53 00:03:14,774 --> 00:03:16,009 You have to greet them. 54 00:03:16,109 --> 00:03:17,511 You know, you have to figure out the right, 55 00:03:17,610 --> 00:03:19,579 the right, um... the-the proper greeting. 56 00:03:19,679 --> 00:03:20,914 Okay. 57 00:03:22,015 --> 00:03:24,117 This is what you're supposed to be working on, sweetheart, 58 00:03:24,217 --> 00:03:25,453 with Dr. Sherman. 59 00:03:25,553 --> 00:03:27,854 Have you been doing those letters he wants you to do? 60 00:03:27,954 --> 00:03:29,290 "Dear Evan Hansen." 61 00:03:29,390 --> 00:03:32,692 I mean, I've definitely... I-I've been trying to. 62 00:03:32,792 --> 00:03:33,827 Those letters are important, honey. 63 00:03:33,927 --> 00:03:35,329 You have to keep working. 64 00:03:35,429 --> 00:03:38,031 We can't go back to where you were last year, right? 65 00:03:38,131 --> 00:03:39,866 Um, you have an appointment this afternoon. 66 00:03:39,966 --> 00:03:41,302 I'm working till 6:00, 67 00:03:41,402 --> 00:03:44,037 so you're gonna have to take the bus. 68 00:03:44,137 --> 00:03:45,473 Hey. 69 00:03:45,573 --> 00:03:46,906 I thought you could go around 70 00:03:47,006 --> 00:03:49,543 and ask all the other kids to sign your cast. 71 00:03:49,642 --> 00:03:51,144 Perfect icebreaker, right? 72 00:03:52,979 --> 00:03:55,682 - What happened to your shirt? - There was a stain on it. 73 00:03:55,782 --> 00:03:57,684 - Wha... But it's brand-new. - Yes, I know. 74 00:03:57,784 --> 00:03:59,819 I was... I'm so mad. 75 00:03:59,919 --> 00:04:02,423 ♪ We start with stars in our eyes ♪ 76 00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:06,659 ♪ We start believing that we belong ♪ 77 00:04:06,759 --> 00:04:09,863 ♪ But every sun doesn't rise ♪ 78 00:04:09,963 --> 00:04:13,199 ♪ And no one tells you where you went wrong ♪ 79 00:04:13,300 --> 00:04:15,835 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun ♪ 80 00:04:15,935 --> 00:04:18,171 ♪ If you keep getting burned ♪ 81 00:04:19,739 --> 00:04:23,910 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun because you've learned ♪ 82 00:04:24,010 --> 00:04:26,212 ♪ Because you've learned ♪ 83 00:04:26,313 --> 00:04:29,082 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 84 00:04:29,182 --> 00:04:31,918 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 85 00:04:32,018 --> 00:04:36,055 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 86 00:04:36,156 --> 00:04:38,292 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 87 00:04:38,392 --> 00:04:42,162 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 88 00:04:42,262 --> 00:04:45,265 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 89 00:04:45,366 --> 00:04:49,169 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 90 00:04:49,269 --> 00:04:51,605 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 91 00:04:51,704 --> 00:04:53,239 ♪ Oh ♪ 92 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:56,377 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 93 00:04:56,477 --> 00:04:58,778 ♪ Is anybody waving? ♪ 94 00:04:58,878 --> 00:05:00,079 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 95 00:05:00,180 --> 00:05:02,148 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 96 00:05:02,248 --> 00:05:05,218 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 97 00:05:05,319 --> 00:05:06,853 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 98 00:05:06,953 --> 00:05:08,556 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 99 00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:11,925 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 100 00:05:12,025 --> 00:05:13,627 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 101 00:05:13,726 --> 00:05:15,261 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 102 00:05:15,362 --> 00:05:18,131 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 103 00:05:18,231 --> 00:05:20,166 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 104 00:05:20,266 --> 00:05:22,001 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 105 00:05:22,101 --> 00:05:25,306 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 106 00:05:25,406 --> 00:05:28,309 ♪ Did I even make a sound? Did I even make a sound? ♪ 107 00:05:28,409 --> 00:05:29,876 ♪ It's like I never made a sound ♪ 108 00:05:29,976 --> 00:05:33,012 ♪ Will I ever make a sound? ♪ 109 00:05:33,112 --> 00:05:35,549 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 110 00:05:35,649 --> 00:05:38,952 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 111 00:05:39,052 --> 00:05:42,623 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 112 00:05:42,722 --> 00:05:44,491 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 113 00:05:44,592 --> 00:05:48,429 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 114 00:05:48,529 --> 00:05:51,931 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 115 00:05:52,031 --> 00:05:55,969 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 116 00:05:56,069 --> 00:05:58,372 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 117 00:05:58,472 --> 00:05:59,973 ♪ Oh ♪ 118 00:06:00,840 --> 00:06:03,076 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 119 00:06:03,176 --> 00:06:08,748 ♪ Is anybody waving back at me? ♪ 120 00:06:08,848 --> 00:06:12,085 ♪ Is anybody waving? ♪ 121 00:06:12,185 --> 00:06:15,623 ♪ Waving, waving ♪ 122 00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:17,890 ♪ Whoa... ♪ 123 00:06:17,991 --> 00:06:23,664 ♪ Whoa. ♪ 124 00:06:23,763 --> 00:06:25,332 ♪ Let's go, Bobcats, let's go... ♪ 125 00:06:27,635 --> 00:06:28,935 Evan. 126 00:06:30,371 --> 00:06:31,472 What? 127 00:06:31,572 --> 00:06:32,839 It's Zoe Murphy 128 00:06:32,939 --> 00:06:35,409 in that hot band shirt you love so much. 129 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:36,976 Can you just... Can you please stop? 130 00:06:37,076 --> 00:06:38,545 Well, hey, maybe she's into you, too. 131 00:06:38,646 --> 00:06:40,146 Maybe you should talk to her, tell her how you feel. 132 00:06:40,246 --> 00:06:42,215 I've tried talking to her. 133 00:06:42,316 --> 00:06:43,584 Really? 134 00:06:43,684 --> 00:06:45,852 Yes. Yeah, I... 135 00:06:45,952 --> 00:06:47,354 I stayed afterwards, um, last year 136 00:06:47,454 --> 00:06:49,188 after the spring jazz band concert, 137 00:06:49,290 --> 00:06:50,691 but, um, I didn't go up to her 138 00:06:50,790 --> 00:06:52,693 because I was worried that my hands were sweaty. 139 00:06:52,792 --> 00:06:54,361 Which they weren't even, they weren't even that sweaty. 140 00:06:54,461 --> 00:06:55,962 I just... I was worried that they were sweaty, 141 00:06:56,062 --> 00:06:57,464 and sometimes worrying that they're sweaty 142 00:06:57,564 --> 00:06:59,165 makes them sweaty, so I just went to the bathroom 143 00:06:59,265 --> 00:07:00,734 and I put 'em under, like, the hand dryer thing, 144 00:07:00,833 --> 00:07:02,201 but then they were still sweaty. 145 00:07:02,303 --> 00:07:04,871 They were just, um... They were just also warm. 146 00:07:06,373 --> 00:07:08,007 I was kidding. 147 00:07:08,107 --> 00:07:09,643 You obviously should not talk to her. 148 00:07:09,743 --> 00:07:11,244 You are a literal disaster. 149 00:07:19,018 --> 00:07:20,953 Go, Bobcats! 150 00:07:26,627 --> 00:07:28,529 Go, Bobcats. 151 00:07:28,629 --> 00:07:29,596 So awesome. 152 00:07:29,697 --> 00:07:31,398 So awesome, everyone. 153 00:07:31,498 --> 00:07:32,700 Phenomenal, really. 154 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:35,268 You know what's not phenomenal? 155 00:07:35,369 --> 00:07:36,403 Deforestation. 156 00:07:36,503 --> 00:07:38,838 So, what happened to your arm exactly? 157 00:07:38,938 --> 00:07:41,575 Um, I was climbing a tree, and I fell. 158 00:07:41,675 --> 00:07:43,009 It was stupid. 159 00:07:43,109 --> 00:07:45,278 You fell out of a tree? What are you, five? 160 00:07:45,379 --> 00:07:47,013 Well, um... 161 00:07:47,113 --> 00:07:48,716 So, actually, I-I worked this summer 162 00:07:48,816 --> 00:07:51,851 as an apprentice park ranger at Ellison State Park. 163 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,055 It's a funny story, though, because... 164 00:07:56,155 --> 00:07:57,990 there was, like, this solid ten minutes after I fell 165 00:07:58,091 --> 00:07:59,593 where I just lay there on the ground, 166 00:07:59,693 --> 00:08:02,028 um, waiting for someone to come get me, you know? 167 00:08:02,128 --> 00:08:03,597 I was like, "Any second now." You know? 168 00:08:03,697 --> 00:08:05,131 I just kept... I, like... I was saying to myself, 169 00:08:05,231 --> 00:08:06,866 "Any second now. Here they come." So... 170 00:08:06,966 --> 00:08:08,302 Did they? 171 00:08:08,402 --> 00:08:09,336 No, nobody came. 172 00:08:09,436 --> 00:08:12,373 That's the, um... That's what's funny. 173 00:08:12,473 --> 00:08:13,640 That's not funny. 174 00:08:13,741 --> 00:08:15,041 Model U.N.... 175 00:08:15,141 --> 00:08:17,578 Well, anyways, um, how was... Did you, um... 176 00:08:17,678 --> 00:08:18,945 How was camp? 177 00:08:19,045 --> 00:08:22,516 Well, I put on 13 pounds of pure muscle. 178 00:08:22,616 --> 00:08:25,352 Also, I hooked up with this Brazilian dude 179 00:08:25,452 --> 00:08:28,522 who is literally a supermodel. 180 00:08:29,523 --> 00:08:31,492 So, yeah, hope that answers your question. 181 00:08:31,592 --> 00:08:35,829 So let's have Mother Nature's back so that she'll have ours. 182 00:08:43,871 --> 00:08:45,606 Yeah! Yeah! 183 00:08:45,706 --> 00:08:48,107 All right, thank you, Alana. Very inspirational. 184 00:08:48,207 --> 00:08:49,976 All right, so let's have a great year, 185 00:08:50,076 --> 00:08:52,211 and, uh, go, Bobcats! 186 00:09:01,954 --> 00:09:04,892 Hey, um... 187 00:09:04,991 --> 00:09:06,326 would you want to sign my cast? 188 00:09:06,427 --> 00:09:08,060 Uh, you could, you could be the first. 189 00:09:08,161 --> 00:09:09,996 Why would I do that? 190 00:09:10,798 --> 00:09:13,966 Well, I just... I thought, um, because we're friends and... 191 00:09:14,066 --> 00:09:15,536 We're family friends, Evan. 192 00:09:15,636 --> 00:09:17,069 That's an entirely different thing. 193 00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:18,705 Please respect that. 194 00:09:30,082 --> 00:09:31,752 Connor, I'm loving this manicure. 195 00:09:31,852 --> 00:09:34,354 - Very school shooter chic. - You're such an idiot. 196 00:09:34,455 --> 00:09:35,789 That is so not... 197 00:09:36,890 --> 00:09:39,091 ♪ Here we go, Bobcats, here we go. ♪ 198 00:09:45,933 --> 00:09:48,000 You think that's funny? 199 00:09:48,100 --> 00:09:50,504 What? No. Not-not at all. 200 00:09:52,306 --> 00:09:54,207 Then stop laughing! 201 00:10:04,751 --> 00:10:06,320 Hey. 202 00:10:09,857 --> 00:10:11,458 I'm sorry about my brother. 203 00:10:11,558 --> 00:10:13,360 He's a psycho. 204 00:10:14,895 --> 00:10:16,996 Evan, right? 205 00:10:17,798 --> 00:10:18,899 Evan? 206 00:10:19,666 --> 00:10:23,035 That-That's your, that's your name? 207 00:10:23,135 --> 00:10:24,705 Y-Yeah, it is. It is. Sorry. 208 00:10:24,805 --> 00:10:26,740 It's Evan. It's Evan. I'm sorry. 209 00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:28,475 Why are you sorry? 210 00:10:28,575 --> 00:10:31,277 'Cause you s-s... you said Evan, and then I said it, you know? 211 00:10:31,378 --> 00:10:33,480 I just repeated it, which is, um... 212 00:10:33,580 --> 00:10:36,483 That's just really annoying when people do that, so... 213 00:10:38,452 --> 00:10:39,786 I'm Zoe. 214 00:10:47,327 --> 00:10:50,330 Sorry. I should... I think... Sorry. 215 00:11:09,349 --> 00:11:10,984 Dear Evan Hansen, 216 00:11:11,083 --> 00:11:14,354 turns out this wasn't an amazing day after all. 217 00:11:15,154 --> 00:11:18,257 This isn't gonna be an amazing week or an amazing year 218 00:11:18,358 --> 00:11:20,761 because why would it be? 219 00:11:24,932 --> 00:11:26,934 Oh, I know. Because there's Zoe. 220 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:31,572 Who I don't even know and who doesn't know me, but... 221 00:11:33,507 --> 00:11:35,976 Maybe if I did, maybe if I could just talk to her, 222 00:11:36,075 --> 00:11:38,478 maybe things would be better. 223 00:11:40,212 --> 00:11:41,748 Or... 224 00:11:42,849 --> 00:11:45,285 ...maybe nothing would be different at all. 225 00:11:47,253 --> 00:11:49,756 I wish everything was different. 226 00:11:49,856 --> 00:11:51,391 I wish I was different. 227 00:11:51,491 --> 00:11:53,026 I wish I was part of something. 228 00:11:53,125 --> 00:11:57,531 I wish that anything I said mattered to anyone. 229 00:11:58,665 --> 00:12:01,768 But it doesn't, and it never did. 230 00:12:03,570 --> 00:12:05,639 And it never will. 231 00:12:07,741 --> 00:12:13,145 I mean, face it, would anyone even notice if I just... 232 00:12:13,245 --> 00:12:15,315 disappeared tomorrow? 233 00:12:15,415 --> 00:12:19,086 Sincerely, your best and most dearest friend, 234 00:12:19,185 --> 00:12:20,821 Me. 235 00:12:28,061 --> 00:12:29,396 Hey. 236 00:12:29,496 --> 00:12:31,298 What happened to your arm? 237 00:12:34,301 --> 00:12:35,702 Um... 238 00:12:36,837 --> 00:12:38,805 I was climbing a tree, and I fell. 239 00:12:38,905 --> 00:12:40,907 You fell out of a tree? 240 00:12:43,209 --> 00:12:45,679 That's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 241 00:12:47,246 --> 00:12:48,815 I know. 242 00:12:56,255 --> 00:12:59,793 S-Sorry, um, I think I accidentally printed something. 243 00:12:59,893 --> 00:13:01,862 Yeah, we're all waiting. 244 00:13:03,262 --> 00:13:05,365 Um, no one signed your cast. 245 00:13:06,366 --> 00:13:07,801 No, I-I know. 246 00:13:07,901 --> 00:13:09,102 I'll sign it. 247 00:13:09,903 --> 00:13:11,505 Oh, you don't... you really don't have to... 248 00:13:11,605 --> 00:13:12,973 Do you have a Sharpie? 249 00:13:13,073 --> 00:13:15,776 Oh, um, I don't. Shoot. 250 00:13:15,876 --> 00:13:17,611 Oh, here's one. 251 00:13:20,013 --> 00:13:21,548 Nice. 252 00:13:36,063 --> 00:13:38,665 Wow, that's great. 253 00:13:38,765 --> 00:13:41,868 Now we can both pretend we have friends. 254 00:13:47,941 --> 00:13:49,743 Uh, "Dear Evan Hansen." Here you go. 255 00:13:49,843 --> 00:13:51,511 Y-Yeah, that's mine. That's mine. 256 00:13:51,611 --> 00:13:53,980 - I'll... I can take it, sorry. - "Because there's Zoe..." 257 00:13:55,115 --> 00:13:56,416 Is this about my sister? 258 00:13:56,516 --> 00:13:59,251 What? No, no. Who's-who's your sister? 259 00:13:59,352 --> 00:14:01,988 - You wanted me to find this? - What? 260 00:14:02,089 --> 00:14:05,192 You saw I was here, so you started writing this 261 00:14:05,292 --> 00:14:06,560 - and you started talking to me. - No. 262 00:14:06,660 --> 00:14:07,794 No, you started talking to me. 263 00:14:07,894 --> 00:14:09,329 So that I would read some creepy shit 264 00:14:09,429 --> 00:14:11,131 about my sister and freak out, right? 265 00:14:11,230 --> 00:14:13,066 - Why would I do that? - So then you can tell everyone 266 00:14:13,166 --> 00:14:15,234 that I'm crazy. Right? 267 00:14:15,335 --> 00:14:18,305 - Right?! - Gentlemen! 268 00:14:19,473 --> 00:14:21,240 No, I really... 269 00:14:21,341 --> 00:14:23,844 Look, I really need that back, so can... 270 00:14:23,944 --> 00:14:26,012 Look, can you please just give it back? 271 00:14:32,552 --> 00:14:34,621 Just-just please don't show it to anyone. 272 00:14:34,721 --> 00:14:35,889 Connor! 273 00:14:47,334 --> 00:14:49,069 Come on. 274 00:14:50,570 --> 00:14:52,906 Shit, shit. 275 00:15:29,910 --> 00:15:31,011 Hi. 276 00:15:31,111 --> 00:15:32,813 Hi, honey. I'm so sorry. 277 00:15:32,913 --> 00:15:34,447 Erica called in at the last minute with a stomach bug, 278 00:15:34,548 --> 00:15:36,817 and there's only one other nurse on tonight, 279 00:15:36,917 --> 00:15:38,919 so I-I volunteered to take her shift. 280 00:15:39,019 --> 00:15:40,687 I hope you weren't waiting for me to eat. 281 00:15:40,787 --> 00:15:43,423 - No, I already ate. - Um, it's just they, uh, 282 00:15:43,523 --> 00:15:45,192 they announced more budget cuts this morning, 283 00:15:45,293 --> 00:15:46,459 so anything I can do to show 284 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:47,661 that I'm a team player, you know? 285 00:15:47,761 --> 00:15:49,696 - How was your day? - Fine. 286 00:15:49,796 --> 00:15:51,164 It was, it was pretty good. 287 00:15:51,264 --> 00:15:54,034 Yeah? You know, I-I texted with Meera this morning, 288 00:15:54,134 --> 00:15:55,635 and she said that Jared was 289 00:15:55,735 --> 00:15:57,938 really looking forward to seeing you and reconnecting. 290 00:15:58,038 --> 00:15:59,406 I thought that was nice. 291 00:15:59,506 --> 00:16:01,775 Yeah, he's so nice. 292 00:16:01,875 --> 00:16:03,543 - How was Dr. Sherman? - Pretty good. 293 00:16:03,643 --> 00:16:05,645 Any change to your meds? 294 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:08,515 Um, no. 295 00:16:08,615 --> 00:16:10,951 Oh, God, here he comes. Um, all right, I-I-I... 296 00:16:11,051 --> 00:16:12,320 All right, love you. Bye. 297 00:16:12,419 --> 00:16:14,821 Okay, I love you... 298 00:16:14,921 --> 00:16:16,423 too. 299 00:16:19,025 --> 00:16:20,794 A letter to yourself. I mean, what is that, 300 00:16:20,894 --> 00:16:22,596 like some kind of sex thing? 301 00:16:22,696 --> 00:16:24,231 No. No, it's not a sex thing. 302 00:16:24,332 --> 00:16:25,966 It's... It was an assignment from my therapist. 303 00:16:26,066 --> 00:16:27,868 Ew. Why-why are you telling me this? 304 00:16:27,968 --> 00:16:29,369 Well, I didn't know who else to tell. 305 00:16:29,469 --> 00:16:31,471 You're my only f... family friend. 306 00:16:31,571 --> 00:16:32,839 Oh, that's sad. 307 00:16:32,939 --> 00:16:34,674 Look, Connor isn't here again today. 308 00:16:34,774 --> 00:16:36,310 That's-that's three days in a row. 309 00:16:36,409 --> 00:16:38,411 And h-he hasn't done anything with it yet, you know, 310 00:16:38,511 --> 00:16:39,646 like put it online or whatever, 311 00:16:39,746 --> 00:16:41,248 because I've-I've been checking. 312 00:16:41,349 --> 00:16:44,084 So, you know, maybe he just... maybe he forgot, right? 313 00:16:44,184 --> 00:16:45,986 Right. Right. 314 00:16:46,086 --> 00:16:47,220 Or maybe he didn't, 315 00:16:47,321 --> 00:16:48,889 because he's definitely gonna put it online. 316 00:16:48,989 --> 00:16:50,957 Dude, Connor Murphy is batshit. 317 00:16:51,057 --> 00:16:53,059 Don't you remember when he threw a printer at Mrs. G 318 00:16:53,159 --> 00:16:55,695 in the second grade because he couldn't be line leader? 319 00:16:55,795 --> 00:16:57,430 Like, he was seven. 320 00:16:57,530 --> 00:16:59,599 Just imagine what he's capable of now. 321 00:16:59,699 --> 00:17:01,534 Evan Hansen, please report 322 00:17:01,635 --> 00:17:03,003 to Mr. Howard's office. 323 00:17:03,103 --> 00:17:04,938 Oh, damn. 324 00:17:10,311 --> 00:17:12,479 Evan. 325 00:17:15,383 --> 00:17:18,852 Connor Murphy's mother and stepfather are here to see you. 326 00:17:18,952 --> 00:17:20,854 They want to speak in private. 327 00:17:43,243 --> 00:17:45,011 Hi. 328 00:17:46,913 --> 00:17:48,014 Hello. 329 00:17:49,783 --> 00:17:51,551 Why don't you go ahead, honey. 330 00:17:51,651 --> 00:17:53,486 I'm going as fast as I can. 331 00:17:53,586 --> 00:17:56,756 Well, that's not what I said, is it? 332 00:17:59,393 --> 00:18:01,127 This is... 333 00:18:02,929 --> 00:18:06,099 Connor wanted you to have this. 334 00:18:19,145 --> 00:18:21,614 Yeah, we didn't know you were friends. 335 00:18:21,715 --> 00:18:23,049 Oh, well, we didn't think 336 00:18:23,149 --> 00:18:25,952 Connor had any friends, frankly, and... 337 00:18:26,052 --> 00:18:28,755 and then we see this note, and it seems to suggest 338 00:18:28,855 --> 00:18:31,325 pretty clearly that you and Connor were, uh... 339 00:18:31,425 --> 00:18:33,927 Or at least for Connor... 340 00:18:34,027 --> 00:18:36,029 "Dear Evan Hansen." He addressed it to you. 341 00:18:36,129 --> 00:18:38,031 He wrote it to you. 342 00:18:38,131 --> 00:18:41,034 These are the words that he wanted to share with you. 343 00:18:43,837 --> 00:18:46,773 His last words. 344 00:18:48,742 --> 00:18:51,144 Connor took his own life. 345 00:18:55,316 --> 00:18:56,716 He what? 346 00:18:57,517 --> 00:18:59,786 This is all we found with him. 347 00:18:59,886 --> 00:19:03,156 He had it folded up in his pocket. 348 00:19:07,527 --> 00:19:09,763 But this is... 349 00:19:09,863 --> 00:19:11,865 I'm sorry, Connor didn't... He... 350 00:19:11,965 --> 00:19:13,166 He didn't write this. 351 00:19:13,266 --> 00:19:15,668 Connor didn't, Connor didn't write this. 352 00:19:15,769 --> 00:19:17,937 What-what does that mean? 353 00:19:18,038 --> 00:19:19,606 Well, he's obviously in shock. 354 00:19:19,706 --> 00:19:21,775 - I mean, if Connor didn't write this... - I'm so sorry. 355 00:19:21,875 --> 00:19:23,743 Can I just... I should probably go, please. 356 00:19:23,843 --> 00:19:25,178 No, you don't understand. This is all that we have. 357 00:19:25,278 --> 00:19:28,114 This is the only thing that we have left. 358 00:19:28,214 --> 00:19:30,817 - Cynthia, listen to me. - No. No. Don't-don't go. 359 00:19:30,917 --> 00:19:32,619 Okay, then you take it. Please take it, okay? 360 00:19:32,719 --> 00:19:33,653 No. No, don't go. 361 00:19:33,753 --> 00:19:36,256 Don't. Please stay. Please. 362 00:19:41,828 --> 00:19:44,831 His best and most dearest friend. 363 00:19:58,546 --> 00:20:01,081 That's-that's Connor. 364 00:20:01,181 --> 00:20:02,248 Connor Murphy. 365 00:20:04,318 --> 00:20:05,819 Holy shit. 366 00:20:05,919 --> 00:20:07,321 They invited me for dinner. 367 00:20:07,421 --> 00:20:09,323 They want to know more stuff about Connor and me, 368 00:20:09,423 --> 00:20:11,425 about our... friendship. 369 00:20:11,525 --> 00:20:13,193 - A-And you said yes? - I froze. 370 00:20:13,294 --> 00:20:16,162 Well... what are you gonna tell them? 371 00:20:16,262 --> 00:20:17,531 I mean, the truth. 372 00:20:17,630 --> 00:20:18,998 I-I don't know, man. 373 00:20:19,099 --> 00:20:20,501 I mean, are you really gonna tell these people 374 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:22,135 that the only thing they have left of their son 375 00:20:22,235 --> 00:20:24,572 is a sex letter that you wrote to yourself? 376 00:20:24,704 --> 00:20:25,805 Hey. 377 00:20:25,905 --> 00:20:28,309 I'm so sorry. 378 00:20:28,409 --> 00:20:30,243 What the hell was that? 379 00:20:30,344 --> 00:20:32,645 I don't know. 380 00:20:32,745 --> 00:20:34,482 Oh, my God, they were so sad, his parents. 381 00:20:34,582 --> 00:20:38,051 I mean, his-his mom was just... 382 00:20:39,185 --> 00:20:41,721 I've never seen anyone so sad before. 383 00:20:48,995 --> 00:20:51,231 I have to tell them. 384 00:21:08,214 --> 00:21:09,416 You're early. 385 00:21:10,417 --> 00:21:12,819 Oh. S-Sorry. 386 00:21:24,632 --> 00:21:26,367 Sit. 387 00:21:31,372 --> 00:21:33,407 I hope you're hungry. 388 00:21:49,923 --> 00:21:51,425 So... 389 00:21:52,926 --> 00:21:54,395 ...you and Connor. 390 00:21:54,495 --> 00:21:56,996 You probably spent a lot of time together, I bet. 391 00:21:58,898 --> 00:22:01,468 So, um, not... 392 00:22:01,569 --> 00:22:03,236 not really, actually. 393 00:22:03,337 --> 00:22:06,440 - Uh, the thing is that I... - We looked through his phone. 394 00:22:07,541 --> 00:22:10,243 His texts, emails. 395 00:22:10,344 --> 00:22:11,778 We didn't find anything from you. 396 00:22:11,878 --> 00:22:13,046 Yeah, no, I know. 397 00:22:13,146 --> 00:22:14,448 - I know. - He set up different accounts, 398 00:22:14,548 --> 00:22:16,082 ones we couldn't find. 399 00:22:16,182 --> 00:22:17,817 He knew you read his emails. 400 00:22:17,917 --> 00:22:20,086 Well, somebody had to be the bad guy. 401 00:22:20,186 --> 00:22:22,623 Well, if you did have any 402 00:22:22,722 --> 00:22:25,925 emails or conversations between the two of you, 403 00:22:26,025 --> 00:22:28,928 we'd love to see anything. 404 00:22:29,028 --> 00:22:30,997 - Well... - Yeah, it's-it's weird. 405 00:22:31,097 --> 00:22:33,099 Th-The only time I saw you two together was 406 00:22:33,199 --> 00:22:35,902 when he was screaming in your face at school last week. 407 00:22:36,002 --> 00:22:37,338 He was screaming at you? 408 00:22:37,438 --> 00:22:38,505 Yeah, yeah, um... 409 00:22:38,606 --> 00:22:40,374 Well, that wasn't very nice. 410 00:22:40,474 --> 00:22:43,876 Well, Connor wasn't very nice, so that actually makes sense. 411 00:22:46,279 --> 00:22:48,549 I think that everybody at this table can agree 412 00:22:48,649 --> 00:22:50,750 that Connor was, um... 413 00:22:51,851 --> 00:22:54,053 ...a complicated person. 414 00:22:54,153 --> 00:22:56,222 No, he was a bad person. 415 00:22:56,323 --> 00:22:57,028 Zoe, please. 416 00:22:57,052 --> 00:22:59,192 Don't pretend like you don't agree with me. 417 00:22:59,293 --> 00:23:01,828 You refuse to remember any of the good things. 418 00:23:01,928 --> 00:23:05,098 Because there were no good things. 419 00:23:05,198 --> 00:23:07,900 What-what were the good things? 420 00:23:08,001 --> 00:23:09,503 I'm not having this conversation 421 00:23:09,603 --> 00:23:12,740 - in front of our guest. - No, tell us the good things. 422 00:23:12,839 --> 00:23:14,341 What were the good things? 423 00:23:14,441 --> 00:23:16,443 - Family day at Sunny Glen? - Zoe! 424 00:23:16,543 --> 00:23:17,810 This is not the time. 425 00:23:17,910 --> 00:23:19,413 Who knew rehab could be so much fun? 426 00:23:19,513 --> 00:23:20,980 There were good things. 427 00:23:21,649 --> 00:23:24,518 I'm not the only one. 428 00:23:24,618 --> 00:23:26,019 You remember, right? 429 00:23:29,789 --> 00:23:30,790 Right. 430 00:23:30,890 --> 00:23:32,125 Of course. 431 00:23:32,225 --> 00:23:33,860 Yes, of course there were good things. 432 00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:36,730 Tell us something. 433 00:23:36,829 --> 00:23:38,197 Please, Evan. 434 00:23:41,934 --> 00:23:43,836 Right, um... 435 00:23:43,936 --> 00:23:46,005 S... Uh, Connor and I... 436 00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,842 Uh, I d... I don't know, um... 437 00:23:51,679 --> 00:23:53,246 We had a really great... 438 00:23:53,347 --> 00:23:56,483 we had a really great time together, um... 439 00:23:56,583 --> 00:23:58,184 this one day recently. 440 00:23:58,285 --> 00:24:02,423 That's something good, um, that I remember. 441 00:24:02,523 --> 00:24:03,823 That day. 442 00:24:03,923 --> 00:24:05,592 Um... 443 00:24:05,693 --> 00:24:08,094 Yeah, that awesome day at the... 444 00:24:08,861 --> 00:24:10,930 ...um, trees. 445 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,668 - Trees? - Never mind, never mind. 446 00:24:14,768 --> 00:24:17,538 I'm sorry, I don't, I don't... I shouldn't have said anything, 447 00:24:17,638 --> 00:24:19,340 and I-I knew it was stupid, so I'm sorry... 448 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,040 You don't mean the orchard, do you? 449 00:24:24,110 --> 00:24:26,580 He took you to the apple orchard? 450 00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:28,649 - When? - Uh, once. 451 00:24:28,749 --> 00:24:29,982 Just-just once. That once. 452 00:24:30,083 --> 00:24:32,486 I thought that place closed years ago. 453 00:24:32,586 --> 00:24:34,521 Well, the hiking trails are still open though, aren't they? 454 00:24:34,621 --> 00:24:37,190 We used to go to the orchard all of the time. 455 00:24:37,291 --> 00:24:39,058 We'd do picnics there. 456 00:24:39,158 --> 00:24:40,893 Do you remember that, Zoe? 457 00:24:40,993 --> 00:24:42,429 Yeah, I do. 458 00:24:42,529 --> 00:24:45,064 And you and Connor would fly that little toy plane 459 00:24:45,164 --> 00:24:47,401 until you crashed it into the creek. 460 00:24:48,901 --> 00:24:50,304 That was an emergency landing. 461 00:24:50,404 --> 00:24:53,474 I can't believe that he took you there. 462 00:24:53,574 --> 00:24:55,274 I bet you had fun. 463 00:24:55,376 --> 00:24:58,512 I bet the two of you... I... 464 00:24:58,612 --> 00:25:00,547 I bet that was fun. 465 00:25:01,548 --> 00:25:03,784 Yeah. 466 00:25:03,883 --> 00:25:05,686 We did. We did. 467 00:25:05,786 --> 00:25:06,687 The whole day. 468 00:25:06,787 --> 00:25:09,690 Uh, it-it was just... 469 00:25:12,258 --> 00:25:14,328 ♪ End of May or early June ♪ 470 00:25:14,428 --> 00:25:19,333 ♪ This picture-perfect afternoon we share ♪ 471 00:25:20,567 --> 00:25:23,504 What was the name of that ice cream place that we loved? 472 00:25:23,604 --> 00:25:24,638 Gifford's? 473 00:25:25,839 --> 00:25:26,874 A La Mode. 474 00:25:26,973 --> 00:25:28,542 That's it. A La Mode. 475 00:25:28,642 --> 00:25:30,910 And they had this homemade hot fudge. 476 00:25:31,010 --> 00:25:34,280 ♪ Drive the winding country road ♪ 477 00:25:34,381 --> 00:25:36,949 ♪ Grab a scoop at A La Mode ♪ 478 00:25:37,049 --> 00:25:38,485 ♪ And then we're there ♪ 479 00:25:38,585 --> 00:25:41,422 And we'd sit in that meadow by the pine trees, 480 00:25:41,522 --> 00:25:44,558 and you and your brother would look for four-leaf clovers. 481 00:25:44,658 --> 00:25:47,327 ♪ An open field that's framed with trees ♪ 482 00:25:47,428 --> 00:25:50,397 ♪ We pick a spot and... ♪ 483 00:25:50,497 --> 00:25:53,300 ♪ Shoot the breeze like buddies do ♪ 484 00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,470 ♪ Uh, quoting songs by our favorite bands ♪ 485 00:25:56,570 --> 00:25:59,306 ♪ Telling jokes no one understands ♪ 486 00:25:59,406 --> 00:26:02,008 ♪ Except us two ♪ 487 00:26:02,108 --> 00:26:07,046 ♪ And we talk and take in the view ♪ 488 00:26:09,148 --> 00:26:13,654 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 489 00:26:13,754 --> 00:26:19,526 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 490 00:26:19,626 --> 00:26:25,499 ♪ Feels like we could go on for forever this way ♪ 491 00:26:27,033 --> 00:26:30,671 ♪ Two friends on a perfect day ♪ 492 00:26:32,706 --> 00:26:35,442 I'd completely forgotten about that place. 493 00:26:35,542 --> 00:26:38,846 Well, I guess Connor didn't, did he? 494 00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:42,316 ♪ We walk a while and talk about ♪ 495 00:26:42,416 --> 00:26:46,620 ♪ The things we'll do when we get out of school ♪ 496 00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:49,456 ♪ Um... bike the Appalachian Trail ♪ 497 00:26:49,556 --> 00:26:52,191 ♪ Or write a book or learn to sail ♪ 498 00:26:52,292 --> 00:26:54,495 ♪ Wouldn't that be cool? ♪ 499 00:26:54,595 --> 00:26:57,063 ♪ There's nothing that we can't discuss ♪ 500 00:26:57,163 --> 00:26:59,967 ♪ Like girls we wish would notice us ♪ 501 00:27:00,066 --> 00:27:02,034 ♪ But never do ♪ 502 00:27:02,134 --> 00:27:04,471 ♪ He looks around and says to me ♪ 503 00:27:04,571 --> 00:27:06,974 ♪ "There's nowhere else I'd rather be" ♪ 504 00:27:07,073 --> 00:27:08,542 ♪ And I say, "Me, too" ♪ 505 00:27:08,642 --> 00:27:13,347 ♪ And we talk and take in the view ♪ 506 00:27:14,448 --> 00:27:19,118 ♪ We just talk and take in the view ♪ 507 00:27:20,186 --> 00:27:23,624 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 508 00:27:23,724 --> 00:27:29,663 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 509 00:27:29,763 --> 00:27:35,969 ♪ Feels like we could go on for forever this way ♪ 510 00:27:36,068 --> 00:27:40,172 ♪ This way ♪ 511 00:27:40,273 --> 00:27:45,144 ♪ All we see is light for forever ♪ 512 00:27:45,244 --> 00:27:49,983 ♪ 'Cause the sun shines bright for forever ♪ 513 00:27:50,082 --> 00:27:56,857 ♪ Like we'll be all right for forever this way ♪ 514 00:27:56,957 --> 00:28:02,261 ♪ Two friends on a perfect day ♪ 515 00:28:02,362 --> 00:28:04,230 ♪ And there he goes ♪ 516 00:28:04,331 --> 00:28:06,967 ♪ Racing toward the tallest tree ♪ 517 00:28:07,066 --> 00:28:09,235 ♪ From far across a yellow field ♪ 518 00:28:09,336 --> 00:28:12,104 ♪ I hear him calling, "Follow me" ♪ 519 00:28:12,204 --> 00:28:13,774 ♪ There we go ♪ 520 00:28:13,874 --> 00:28:17,076 ♪ Wondering how the world might look from up so high ♪ 521 00:28:17,176 --> 00:28:19,613 ♪ One foot after the other ♪ 522 00:28:19,713 --> 00:28:22,015 ♪ One branch then to another ♪ 523 00:28:22,114 --> 00:28:24,116 ♪ I climb higher and higher ♪ 524 00:28:24,216 --> 00:28:27,186 ♪ I climb till the entire sun ♪ 525 00:28:27,287 --> 00:28:33,527 ♪ Shines on my face ♪ 526 00:28:35,562 --> 00:28:41,368 ♪ And I suddenly feel the branch give way ♪ 527 00:28:45,204 --> 00:28:47,273 ♪ I'm on the ground ♪ 528 00:28:48,842 --> 00:28:50,877 ♪ My arm goes numb ♪ 529 00:28:53,112 --> 00:28:54,881 ♪ I look around ♪ 530 00:28:54,982 --> 00:28:57,818 ♪ And I see him come to get me ♪ 531 00:28:59,987 --> 00:29:02,522 He's come to get me. 532 00:29:04,558 --> 00:29:07,427 ♪ And everything's okay ♪ 533 00:29:10,297 --> 00:29:14,868 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 534 00:29:14,968 --> 00:29:20,507 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 535 00:29:21,742 --> 00:29:28,247 ♪ Buddy, you and I for forever this way ♪ 536 00:29:28,348 --> 00:29:31,418 ♪ This way ♪ 537 00:29:31,518 --> 00:29:37,090 ♪ All we see is light ♪ 538 00:29:37,189 --> 00:29:41,695 ♪ 'Cause the sun burns bright ♪ 539 00:29:41,795 --> 00:29:46,066 ♪ We could be all right for forever ♪ 540 00:29:46,165 --> 00:29:51,203 ♪ This way ♪ 541 00:29:51,304 --> 00:29:53,707 ♪ Two friends ♪ 542 00:29:55,475 --> 00:29:57,310 ♪ True friends ♪ 543 00:29:57,411 --> 00:30:00,580 ♪ On a perfect ♪ 544 00:30:01,748 --> 00:30:07,654 ♪ Day. ♪ 545 00:30:08,922 --> 00:30:11,391 Thank you, Evan. 546 00:30:11,491 --> 00:30:14,628 Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. 547 00:30:17,898 --> 00:30:19,666 I mean, they think you were lovers. 548 00:30:19,766 --> 00:30:21,668 - You realize that, right? - Oh, my God. 549 00:30:21,768 --> 00:30:23,303 I thought you were gonna tell them the truth. 550 00:30:23,403 --> 00:30:24,838 I-I-I tried, but then I just... 551 00:30:24,938 --> 00:30:26,540 I got nervous and I started talking. 552 00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:28,141 And then once I started, I just... 553 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:30,043 Couldn't stop. 554 00:30:30,143 --> 00:30:31,545 They didn't want me to stop. 555 00:30:31,645 --> 00:30:33,547 What else did you say to them? 556 00:30:33,647 --> 00:30:35,682 Uh, his mom thinks that we wrote emails to each other. 557 00:30:35,782 --> 00:30:36,917 Oh, perfect. 558 00:30:37,017 --> 00:30:39,086 Sh-She thinks he had, like, secret accounts. 559 00:30:39,186 --> 00:30:40,854 Ha, yes. Secret email accounts. 560 00:30:40,954 --> 00:30:42,889 That's what all the cool kids are doing. 561 00:30:42,989 --> 00:30:44,324 Hansen! Kalwani! 562 00:30:44,424 --> 00:30:45,559 Pick it up! 563 00:30:45,659 --> 00:30:47,794 - No, thank you. - What was that? 564 00:30:47,894 --> 00:30:51,031 I said thank you for the encouragement! 565 00:30:51,131 --> 00:30:52,132 Fascist. 566 00:30:52,231 --> 00:30:53,834 She wants to see the emails. 567 00:30:53,934 --> 00:30:56,303 And now you want me to make a bunch of fake emails for you. 568 00:30:56,403 --> 00:30:57,804 - Classic. - You know how to do that? 569 00:30:57,904 --> 00:31:00,307 - It's simple coding. - But you failed coding. 570 00:31:00,407 --> 00:31:02,274 If you consider a D-minus failing. 571 00:31:02,375 --> 00:31:03,677 Just so we're clear, 572 00:31:03,777 --> 00:31:05,145 I charge a minimum of two grand per email, 573 00:31:05,244 --> 00:31:06,313 and that is a floor, not a ceiling. 574 00:31:06,413 --> 00:31:08,081 - $2,000? - 500. 575 00:31:08,181 --> 00:31:09,349 I didn't even ask for your help. 576 00:31:09,449 --> 00:31:10,784 250, bottom line. Take it or leave it. 577 00:31:10,884 --> 00:31:12,486 I could probably give you 20 bucks. 578 00:31:12,586 --> 00:31:14,621 Fine, but I'm not gonna act like I'm happy about it. 579 00:31:16,690 --> 00:31:18,325 ♪ Dear Evan Hansen ♪ 580 00:31:18,425 --> 00:31:21,561 ♪ We've been way too out of touch ♪ 581 00:31:21,661 --> 00:31:23,130 ♪ Things have been crazy ♪ 582 00:31:23,230 --> 00:31:26,333 ♪ And it sucks that we don't talk that much ♪ 583 00:31:26,433 --> 00:31:31,204 ♪ But I should tell you that I think of you each night ♪ 584 00:31:31,304 --> 00:31:35,408 ♪ I rub my nipples and start moaning with delight ♪ 585 00:31:35,509 --> 00:31:36,676 Why would you write that? 586 00:31:36,777 --> 00:31:38,145 I'm just trying to make it erotic. 587 00:31:38,245 --> 00:31:39,412 Look, if you can't take this seriously, then... 588 00:31:39,513 --> 00:31:40,680 Ugh, calm yourself, honey. 589 00:31:40,781 --> 00:31:42,182 I just want to get this over with. 590 00:31:42,281 --> 00:31:44,050 ♪ I gotta tell you ♪ 591 00:31:44,151 --> 00:31:46,553 ♪ Life without you has been hard ♪ 592 00:31:46,653 --> 00:31:47,721 - "Hard"? - ♪ Has been bad ♪ 593 00:31:47,821 --> 00:31:49,189 - "Bad"? - Has been rough. 594 00:31:49,289 --> 00:31:50,557 - Kinky. - Please stop. 595 00:31:50,657 --> 00:31:52,559 ♪ And I miss talking about life ♪ 596 00:31:52,659 --> 00:31:54,094 ♪ And other stuff ♪ 597 00:31:54,194 --> 00:31:56,029 - Very specific. - Shut up. 598 00:31:56,129 --> 00:31:58,365 - ♪ I like my parents ♪ - Who says that? 599 00:31:58,465 --> 00:32:00,333 ♪ I love my parents ♪ 600 00:32:00,433 --> 00:32:02,769 ♪ But each day's another fight ♪ 601 00:32:03,570 --> 00:32:05,372 ♪ If I stop smoking drugs ♪ 602 00:32:05,472 --> 00:32:08,041 ♪ Then everything might be all right ♪ 603 00:32:08,141 --> 00:32:09,342 "Smoking drugs"? 604 00:32:09,442 --> 00:32:10,844 Just fix it! 605 00:32:10,944 --> 00:32:13,413 - ♪ If I stop smoking crack ♪ - "Crack"? 606 00:32:13,513 --> 00:32:15,348 ♪ If I stop smoking pot ♪ 607 00:32:15,448 --> 00:32:18,351 ♪ Then everything might be all right ♪ 608 00:32:18,451 --> 00:32:20,587 ♪ I'll take your advice ♪ 609 00:32:20,687 --> 00:32:23,490 ♪ I'll try to be more nice ♪ 610 00:32:23,590 --> 00:32:24,891 ♪ I'll turn it around ♪ 611 00:32:24,991 --> 00:32:28,228 ♪ Wait and see ♪ 612 00:32:28,328 --> 00:32:33,033 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 613 00:32:33,133 --> 00:32:37,838 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 614 00:32:37,938 --> 00:32:40,407 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 615 00:32:40,507 --> 00:32:43,210 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 616 00:32:43,311 --> 00:32:45,512 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 617 00:32:45,612 --> 00:32:46,947 Are we done? 618 00:32:47,047 --> 00:32:48,615 Well, I mean, I can't just show them one email. 619 00:32:48,715 --> 00:32:50,617 I want to show that I was, like, a good friend. 620 00:32:50,717 --> 00:32:52,919 That I was trying to help him, you know? 621 00:32:53,019 --> 00:32:54,387 Oh, my God. 622 00:32:54,487 --> 00:32:56,489 ♪ Dear Connor Murphy ♪ 623 00:32:56,590 --> 00:33:00,026 ♪ Yes, I also miss our talks ♪ 624 00:33:00,126 --> 00:33:01,561 ♪ Stop doing drugs ♪ 625 00:33:01,661 --> 00:33:04,298 ♪ Just try to take deep breaths and go on walks ♪ 626 00:33:04,397 --> 00:33:06,399 - No. - ♪ I'm sending pictures ♪ 627 00:33:06,499 --> 00:33:08,401 ♪ Of the most amazing trees ♪ 628 00:33:08,501 --> 00:33:09,736 No. 629 00:33:09,836 --> 00:33:11,404 ♪ You'll be obsessed with ♪ 630 00:33:11,504 --> 00:33:14,274 - ♪ All my forest expertise ♪ - What? 631 00:33:14,374 --> 00:33:17,244 ♪ Dude, I'm proud of you ♪ 632 00:33:17,345 --> 00:33:20,046 ♪ Just keep pushing through ♪ 633 00:33:20,146 --> 00:33:22,215 ♪ You're turning around, I can see ♪ 634 00:33:22,316 --> 00:33:24,084 ♪ Just wait and see ♪ 635 00:33:24,184 --> 00:33:29,422 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 636 00:33:29,522 --> 00:33:34,362 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 637 00:33:34,461 --> 00:33:36,863 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 638 00:33:36,963 --> 00:33:39,599 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 639 00:33:39,699 --> 00:33:41,501 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 640 00:33:41,601 --> 00:33:42,669 ♪ My sister's hot ♪ 641 00:33:42,769 --> 00:33:44,437 - What the hell? - My bad. 642 00:33:44,537 --> 00:33:45,939 ♪ Dear Evan Hansen ♪ 643 00:33:46,039 --> 00:33:49,576 ♪ Thanks for every note you send ♪ 644 00:33:49,676 --> 00:33:50,944 ♪ Dear Connor Murphy ♪ 645 00:33:51,044 --> 00:33:54,348 ♪ I'm just glad to be your friend ♪ 646 00:33:54,447 --> 00:33:56,750 ♪ Our friendship goes beyond ♪ 647 00:33:56,850 --> 00:33:59,287 ♪ Your average kind of bond ♪ 648 00:33:59,387 --> 00:34:01,588 ♪ But not because they're gay ♪ 649 00:34:01,688 --> 00:34:03,189 ♪ No, not because... ♪ 650 00:34:03,291 --> 00:34:04,557 ♪ Well, anyway ♪ 651 00:34:04,658 --> 00:34:06,760 ♪ You're getting better every day ♪ 652 00:34:06,860 --> 00:34:08,995 ♪ I'm getting better every day ♪ 653 00:34:09,095 --> 00:34:10,497 - ♪ Keep ♪ - ♪ Getting ♪ 654 00:34:10,597 --> 00:34:11,299 - ♪ Better ♪ - ♪ Every ♪ 655 00:34:11,399 --> 00:34:12,400 ♪ Day ♪ 656 00:34:12,499 --> 00:34:14,000 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 657 00:34:14,100 --> 00:34:18,972 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 658 00:34:19,072 --> 00:34:23,810 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 659 00:34:23,910 --> 00:34:26,479 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 660 00:34:26,579 --> 00:34:29,182 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 661 00:34:29,282 --> 00:34:31,251 ♪ Sincerely ♪ 662 00:34:31,352 --> 00:34:34,154 ♪ Miss you dearly ♪ 663 00:34:34,254 --> 00:34:36,823 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 664 00:34:37,590 --> 00:34:39,192 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 665 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:43,463 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 666 00:34:43,563 --> 00:34:45,231 ♪ Sincerely, Me. ♪ 667 00:34:48,969 --> 00:34:51,638 I can't remember the last time that I heard him laugh, 668 00:34:51,738 --> 00:34:53,673 but the two of them, if you read these... 669 00:34:53,773 --> 00:34:55,575 I think if you could take ten minutes 670 00:34:55,675 --> 00:34:57,477 and actually read these emails... 671 00:34:57,577 --> 00:34:59,679 I'm looking at them right now. 672 00:35:01,915 --> 00:35:04,517 Zoe. Look what Evan sent us. 673 00:35:04,617 --> 00:35:07,053 They're emails from your brother. 674 00:35:07,153 --> 00:35:08,289 I printed them out. 675 00:35:08,389 --> 00:35:10,557 Oh. Take that, trees. 676 00:35:10,657 --> 00:35:12,158 - How was school? - Terrific. 677 00:35:12,258 --> 00:35:14,328 All of a sudden, people I've never met 678 00:35:14,428 --> 00:35:15,795 want to be my best friend. 679 00:35:15,895 --> 00:35:18,631 I'm the dead kid's sister, didn't you know? 680 00:35:19,433 --> 00:35:20,667 I'm sure they mean well. 681 00:35:20,767 --> 00:35:23,003 I'm sure they don't. 682 00:35:29,509 --> 00:35:31,345 She needs time. 683 00:35:32,178 --> 00:35:35,048 No, Larry, she needs her parents. 684 00:35:35,148 --> 00:35:37,250 Enjoy the game. 685 00:35:44,591 --> 00:35:46,059 Can I come in? 686 00:35:49,162 --> 00:35:50,398 Oh. 687 00:35:50,498 --> 00:35:53,066 You don't have to stop playing. 688 00:35:54,067 --> 00:35:55,969 How was band? 689 00:35:58,472 --> 00:36:01,475 You know, he-he talks about you playing guitar, 690 00:36:01,574 --> 00:36:05,379 in one of his emails, at the spring concert last year. 691 00:36:05,479 --> 00:36:07,247 Really? 692 00:36:07,348 --> 00:36:08,281 Yeah. 693 00:36:08,382 --> 00:36:11,951 Does he, does he talk about 694 00:36:12,052 --> 00:36:14,220 when he disappeared for two days? 695 00:36:14,321 --> 00:36:17,291 But then he called me and asked me to come pick him up. 696 00:36:17,391 --> 00:36:18,658 He wanted to come home, 697 00:36:18,758 --> 00:36:20,193 but he wasn't ready to talk to you yet, 698 00:36:20,294 --> 00:36:23,431 so I took the bus all the way downtown to get him, 699 00:36:23,531 --> 00:36:26,132 and guess what. 700 00:36:28,935 --> 00:36:31,805 All he really wanted was money. 701 00:36:34,308 --> 00:36:38,711 And I gave it to him because I was 12. 702 00:36:41,247 --> 00:36:43,249 He was struggling. 703 00:36:45,352 --> 00:36:47,787 How about the time he tried to punch through my door, 704 00:36:47,887 --> 00:36:49,290 screaming at the top of his lungs, 705 00:36:49,390 --> 00:36:52,393 saying he was gonna kill me for no reason? 706 00:36:52,493 --> 00:36:54,761 Is that email in there? 707 00:36:56,196 --> 00:36:58,665 We're all grieving in our own way. 708 00:37:05,439 --> 00:37:09,376 You might consider reading these when you're ready. 709 00:37:10,677 --> 00:37:13,046 They might help more than you think. 710 00:37:30,230 --> 00:37:33,467 ♪ Why should I play this game of pretend? ♪ 711 00:37:34,634 --> 00:37:39,272 ♪ Remembering through a secondhand sorrow ♪ 712 00:37:39,373 --> 00:37:43,276 ♪ Such a great son and wonderful friend ♪ 713 00:37:43,377 --> 00:37:47,881 ♪ Oh, don't the tears just pour ♪ 714 00:37:48,748 --> 00:37:52,152 ♪ I could curl up and hide in my room ♪ 715 00:37:53,253 --> 00:37:57,790 ♪ Here in my bed still sobbing tomorrow ♪ 716 00:37:57,891 --> 00:38:01,895 ♪ I could give in to all of the gloom ♪ 717 00:38:01,995 --> 00:38:06,900 ♪ But tell me, tell me what for ♪ 718 00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,969 ♪ Why should I have a heavy heart? ♪ 719 00:38:10,069 --> 00:38:12,939 ♪ Why should I start to break in pieces? ♪ 720 00:38:13,039 --> 00:38:17,311 ♪ Why should I go and fall apart for you? ♪ 721 00:38:19,112 --> 00:38:24,552 ♪ Why should I play the grieving girl ♪ 722 00:38:24,652 --> 00:38:27,421 ♪ And lie ♪ 723 00:38:27,521 --> 00:38:32,359 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that my world ♪ 724 00:38:32,459 --> 00:38:37,931 ♪ Has gone dark without your light? ♪ 725 00:38:39,533 --> 00:38:42,769 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 726 00:38:44,438 --> 00:38:45,673 ♪ Tonight ♪ 727 00:38:53,547 --> 00:38:57,016 ♪ We gave you the world, you threw it away ♪ 728 00:38:58,251 --> 00:39:02,722 ♪ Leaving these broken pieces behind you ♪ 729 00:39:02,822 --> 00:39:06,893 ♪ Everything wasted, nothing to say ♪ 730 00:39:06,993 --> 00:39:09,829 ♪ So I can sing no requiem ♪ 731 00:39:09,929 --> 00:39:14,234 ♪ I hear your voice and feel you near ♪ 732 00:39:14,335 --> 00:39:19,105 ♪ Within these words I finally find you ♪ 733 00:39:19,205 --> 00:39:23,510 ♪ And now that I know that you are still here ♪ 734 00:39:23,611 --> 00:39:26,746 ♪ I will sing no requiem tonight ♪ 735 00:39:26,846 --> 00:39:29,550 ♪ Why should I have a heavy heart? ♪ 736 00:39:29,650 --> 00:39:32,453 ♪ Why should I say I'll keep you with me? ♪ 737 00:39:32,553 --> 00:39:38,258 ♪ Why should I go and fall apart for you? ♪ 738 00:39:38,359 --> 00:39:41,094 ♪ Why ♪ 739 00:39:41,194 --> 00:39:43,397 ♪ Should I play the grieving girl ♪ 740 00:39:43,497 --> 00:39:46,500 ♪ And lie ♪ 741 00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:49,235 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that ♪ 742 00:39:49,336 --> 00:39:53,139 ♪ My world has gone dark without your light? ♪ 743 00:39:53,239 --> 00:39:57,711 ♪ I can see your light ♪ 744 00:39:57,810 --> 00:40:01,315 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 745 00:40:01,415 --> 00:40:03,182 ♪ Tonight ♪ 746 00:40:03,284 --> 00:40:05,818 ♪ 'Cause when the villains fall ♪ 747 00:40:05,918 --> 00:40:08,522 ♪ The kingdoms never weep ♪ 748 00:40:08,622 --> 00:40:13,294 ♪ No one lights a candle to remember ♪ 749 00:40:13,394 --> 00:40:16,497 ♪ No, no one mourns at all ♪ 750 00:40:16,597 --> 00:40:19,633 ♪ When they lay them down to sleep ♪ 751 00:40:19,733 --> 00:40:26,607 ♪ So don't tell me that I didn't have it right ♪ 752 00:40:26,707 --> 00:40:31,612 ♪ Don't tell me that it wasn't black and white ♪ 753 00:40:31,712 --> 00:40:34,180 ♪ After all you put me through ♪ 754 00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:37,418 ♪ Don't say it wasn't true ♪ 755 00:40:37,518 --> 00:40:41,220 ♪ That you were not the monster ♪ 756 00:40:49,896 --> 00:40:52,131 ♪ That I knew ♪ 757 00:40:55,134 --> 00:40:58,237 ♪ 'Cause I ♪ 758 00:40:58,339 --> 00:41:03,577 ♪ Cannot play the grieving girl and lie ♪ 759 00:41:03,677 --> 00:41:08,782 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that my world ♪ 760 00:41:08,881 --> 00:41:11,117 ♪ Has gone dark ♪ 761 00:41:15,221 --> 00:41:19,125 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 762 00:41:20,026 --> 00:41:23,896 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 763 00:41:24,798 --> 00:41:28,000 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 764 00:41:29,936 --> 00:41:31,405 ♪ Tonight ♪ 765 00:41:31,505 --> 00:41:33,973 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 766 00:41:34,073 --> 00:41:36,242 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 767 00:41:36,343 --> 00:41:38,812 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 768 00:41:38,911 --> 00:41:43,983 ♪ Oh, oh. ♪ 769 00:41:45,853 --> 00:41:47,755 They did a whole thing about them on NPR yesterday, 770 00:41:47,855 --> 00:41:49,088 these-these essay contests. 771 00:41:49,188 --> 00:41:50,491 And if you win, 772 00:41:50,591 --> 00:41:52,091 it doesn't count against any financial aid. 773 00:41:52,191 --> 00:41:57,029 You know, so $5,000 here or $3,000 there. 774 00:41:57,130 --> 00:41:59,232 It adds up, and we're gonna need 775 00:41:59,333 --> 00:42:01,468 all the help we can get with college. 776 00:42:01,568 --> 00:42:04,838 I mean, unless your stepmother has some trust fund for you 777 00:42:04,937 --> 00:42:07,273 that I don't know about with all those fabulous tips 778 00:42:07,374 --> 00:42:08,842 - she made cocktail waitressing. - Huh. 779 00:42:08,941 --> 00:42:10,844 Right? 780 00:42:10,943 --> 00:42:12,446 Mm. 781 00:42:17,484 --> 00:42:18,685 I got a... 782 00:42:18,786 --> 00:42:21,555 I got an email from your school yesterday, 783 00:42:21,655 --> 00:42:25,659 um, about that boy that-that killed himself. 784 00:42:25,759 --> 00:42:26,926 Connor Murphy? 785 00:42:27,026 --> 00:42:28,695 Yeah. 786 00:42:28,796 --> 00:42:30,330 I didn't really know him, so... 787 00:42:30,431 --> 00:42:35,067 You know, if you ever want to talk about anything... 788 00:42:35,168 --> 00:42:37,069 You know, I mean, I mean, I know that lately 789 00:42:37,170 --> 00:42:38,472 it feels like I'm-I'm always working. 790 00:42:38,572 --> 00:42:40,340 - It's fine. - But I'm-I'm-I'm here, 791 00:42:40,441 --> 00:42:42,975 and if I... If I'm not here, I'm just a phone call away 792 00:42:43,075 --> 00:42:44,711 or an email or a text, you know, whatever. 793 00:42:44,812 --> 00:42:46,279 I know. 794 00:42:47,079 --> 00:42:49,917 It says "Connor" on your cast. 795 00:42:50,016 --> 00:42:52,084 Oh. 796 00:42:52,185 --> 00:42:53,587 No, no, yeah. Um... 797 00:42:53,687 --> 00:42:55,955 - You said you didn't know him. - Sorry, I didn't. 798 00:42:56,055 --> 00:42:57,758 Um... 799 00:42:57,858 --> 00:43:00,527 It's in memory, so, like... 800 00:43:00,627 --> 00:43:02,830 Y-You know, kids are, like, um... 801 00:43:02,930 --> 00:43:04,665 they're writing his name on-on... 802 00:43:04,765 --> 00:43:07,634 lockers and stuff like that. 803 00:43:07,734 --> 00:43:09,202 Oh. 804 00:43:10,938 --> 00:43:13,005 Um... 805 00:43:15,141 --> 00:43:18,244 That's lovely. You know, in memory. 806 00:43:18,345 --> 00:43:19,746 Hmm. 807 00:43:22,483 --> 00:43:23,282 Hey. 808 00:43:23,383 --> 00:43:25,251 Tuesday. What are you doing? 809 00:43:26,353 --> 00:43:28,922 When's the last time we did Taco Tuesday? 810 00:43:29,021 --> 00:43:30,657 That'd be great. 811 00:43:30,757 --> 00:43:32,693 Really? 812 00:43:32,793 --> 00:43:34,193 Yeah. 813 00:43:34,294 --> 00:43:36,195 So the memorial's really just an opportunity 814 00:43:36,296 --> 00:43:38,097 for all of us to come together as a community 815 00:43:38,197 --> 00:43:41,602 and to remember Connor and celebrate who he was. 816 00:43:42,569 --> 00:43:44,036 Would you want to speak or perform? 817 00:43:44,136 --> 00:43:45,939 I didn't really know him. I'm sorry. 818 00:43:46,038 --> 00:43:48,174 - That's okay. - Bye. 819 00:44:00,287 --> 00:44:01,555 Want a wristband? 820 00:44:01,655 --> 00:44:03,957 Oh, yes. Yeah. Okay. 821 00:44:04,056 --> 00:44:05,425 Thank you. 822 00:44:08,227 --> 00:44:10,062 You were friends with him, right? 823 00:44:11,398 --> 00:44:13,300 I saw him sign your cast in the library, 824 00:44:13,400 --> 00:44:15,969 and you started arguing about something. 825 00:44:16,837 --> 00:44:19,540 - Were you friends with him? - We weren't close. 826 00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:22,342 We presented together o-on Huck Finn in the tenth grade, 827 00:44:22,442 --> 00:44:25,278 but he probably didn't tell you that. 828 00:44:25,379 --> 00:44:27,146 Um, no, no, I didn't know. 829 00:44:27,246 --> 00:44:29,316 I always really liked him. 830 00:44:29,416 --> 00:44:31,018 It seemed like he didn't really care 831 00:44:31,117 --> 00:44:32,986 what anyone else thought, and... 832 00:44:33,085 --> 00:44:34,888 I thought that was pretty remarkable. 833 00:44:38,692 --> 00:44:41,093 Well, I'm putting together a memorial for him 834 00:44:41,193 --> 00:44:43,262 at school on Friday. 835 00:44:43,363 --> 00:44:44,798 If you wanted to do something... 836 00:44:44,898 --> 00:44:47,233 Oh. Um... 837 00:44:47,334 --> 00:44:49,436 Sorry, I-I... 838 00:44:49,536 --> 00:44:53,105 I-I probably w-would rather not, if that's okay. 839 00:44:53,205 --> 00:44:54,240 Yeah, sure. 840 00:44:54,341 --> 00:44:56,777 If you change your mind... 841 00:44:56,877 --> 00:44:58,045 just text me. 842 00:45:02,015 --> 00:45:04,150 Okay. 843 00:45:10,791 --> 00:45:12,191 Mom. 844 00:45:50,364 --> 00:45:52,432 My mom realized we were out of ice cream, 845 00:45:52,532 --> 00:45:54,601 so they went to go get more. 846 00:45:55,402 --> 00:45:57,304 Did you park in the driveway? 847 00:45:57,404 --> 00:45:59,740 'Cause if you park on the street, they'll ticket you. 848 00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:01,708 The people in this neighborhood are monsters. 849 00:46:01,808 --> 00:46:03,844 Um, no, I didn't, I didn't, um... 850 00:46:03,944 --> 00:46:06,046 I took the bus. My mom needed the car for work. 851 00:46:06,145 --> 00:46:08,115 - What about your dad? - My dad. 852 00:46:08,214 --> 00:46:10,817 Um, he lives in Colorado, so... 853 00:46:10,917 --> 00:46:13,152 He left when I was seven. 854 00:46:15,689 --> 00:46:17,256 That sucks. 855 00:46:18,257 --> 00:46:21,762 Mine died when I was one, so... 856 00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:23,063 I sort of win. 857 00:46:24,163 --> 00:46:26,099 - Sorry. - Thanks. 858 00:46:26,198 --> 00:46:27,634 It's fine. 859 00:46:27,734 --> 00:46:30,871 I-I don't even really remember him, to be honest. 860 00:46:30,971 --> 00:46:33,774 Connor did, though, a little. 861 00:46:33,874 --> 00:46:35,742 That's terrible. 862 00:46:35,842 --> 00:46:37,176 Yeah. 863 00:46:37,276 --> 00:46:41,180 And then Larry showed up, fixed everything. 864 00:46:42,349 --> 00:46:44,518 For a while, at least. 865 00:46:44,618 --> 00:46:45,986 Yeah. 866 00:46:46,086 --> 00:46:48,722 Most people, with Connor, they just would've been like, 867 00:46:48,822 --> 00:46:53,560 "See ya," but he's the only dad we ever really knew, so... 868 00:46:54,895 --> 00:46:57,064 Wow, your mom... I didn't, I didn't realize. 869 00:46:57,164 --> 00:46:58,532 Yeah, well. 870 00:46:58,632 --> 00:47:01,034 She's in total denial now. 871 00:47:01,134 --> 00:47:02,436 So is Larry. 872 00:47:02,536 --> 00:47:04,071 I mean, he didn't even cry at the funeral. 873 00:47:04,171 --> 00:47:05,439 I'm sorry. 874 00:47:06,406 --> 00:47:08,975 Not as sorry as you're gonna be. 875 00:47:10,711 --> 00:47:12,679 - Oh, is-is that the... - Mm-hmm. 876 00:47:12,779 --> 00:47:16,183 Gluten-free apple pie? You bet. 877 00:47:16,282 --> 00:47:17,851 It-it looks... 878 00:47:19,386 --> 00:47:21,154 Inedible? 879 00:47:21,253 --> 00:47:22,823 It is. 880 00:47:23,690 --> 00:47:26,593 Just be glad we get to have real ice cream. 881 00:47:26,693 --> 00:47:28,595 My mom was Buddhist last year, 882 00:47:28,695 --> 00:47:30,397 so we couldn't have any animal products. 883 00:47:30,497 --> 00:47:32,866 She was B... um, Buddhist last year but not this year? 884 00:47:32,966 --> 00:47:35,335 Yep. That's sort of what she does. 885 00:47:35,435 --> 00:47:37,204 She gets into a lot of different things. 886 00:47:37,304 --> 00:47:40,407 - Mm. - For a while, it was Pilates. 887 00:47:40,507 --> 00:47:42,274 The Secret. 888 00:47:42,375 --> 00:47:44,177 Buddhism. Et cetera. 889 00:47:44,276 --> 00:47:46,513 It's cool that she's interested in so much different stuff. 890 00:47:46,613 --> 00:47:47,848 Yeah, she's not, though. 891 00:47:47,948 --> 00:47:50,050 That's just what happens when you're rich 892 00:47:50,150 --> 00:47:51,118 and you don't have a job. 893 00:47:51,218 --> 00:47:52,319 You get a little crazy. 894 00:47:52,419 --> 00:47:53,587 Well, my mom always says 895 00:47:53,687 --> 00:47:55,188 it's better to be rich than poor, so... 896 00:47:55,288 --> 00:47:56,857 Yeah, well, your mom's probably never been rich, then. 897 00:47:56,957 --> 00:47:58,825 Yeah, you've probably never been poor. 898 00:48:00,894 --> 00:48:02,295 Oh, my God, I can't believe I just said that. 899 00:48:02,395 --> 00:48:03,630 I'm so sorry. 900 00:48:03,730 --> 00:48:05,699 Wow. I didn't realize 901 00:48:05,799 --> 00:48:08,201 you were capable of saying something that wasn't nice. 902 00:48:08,301 --> 00:48:09,836 I'm n... I'm not. I'm really sorry. 903 00:48:09,936 --> 00:48:12,405 You really don't have to keep saying that. 904 00:48:12,506 --> 00:48:14,407 Okay. 905 00:48:14,508 --> 00:48:16,576 You want to say it again. 906 00:48:16,676 --> 00:48:18,111 Yeah, very much so, I do. 907 00:48:25,118 --> 00:48:27,687 Why did he write that... 908 00:48:27,788 --> 00:48:28,989 in his note? 909 00:48:29,089 --> 00:48:31,024 "Because there's Zoe. 910 00:48:31,124 --> 00:48:34,795 And I don't even know her, but if I could just talk to her..." 911 00:48:37,297 --> 00:48:39,399 Honestly, I really don't know. 912 00:48:39,499 --> 00:48:42,102 What does any of that even mean? I mean... 913 00:48:42,202 --> 00:48:44,337 We weren't close at all. 914 00:48:44,437 --> 00:48:46,706 Not since we were kids. 915 00:48:46,807 --> 00:48:48,809 He never noticed anything about me. 916 00:48:48,909 --> 00:48:51,411 That's not true. That's not true. 917 00:48:51,511 --> 00:48:53,780 He-he-he noticed a lot of things about you. 918 00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:55,582 Like what things? 919 00:49:05,492 --> 00:49:06,760 Right. 920 00:49:06,860 --> 00:49:07,761 No, no, no. 921 00:49:07,861 --> 00:49:09,863 That's, um... 922 00:49:09,963 --> 00:49:11,031 Well... 923 00:49:11,131 --> 00:49:12,933 Okay, w... Okay. 924 00:49:13,033 --> 00:49:15,068 Here's something. Um... 925 00:49:15,168 --> 00:49:18,805 Whenever you have, uh, a solo in-in jazz band, 926 00:49:18,905 --> 00:49:21,007 you just... you close your e... 927 00:49:21,107 --> 00:49:22,576 you probably don't even know you're doing this, 928 00:49:22,676 --> 00:49:25,078 but you close your eyes, um, and you get, like... 929 00:49:25,178 --> 00:49:26,847 I don't know, it's like a half smile, 930 00:49:26,947 --> 00:49:28,648 like you just heard the funniest thing in the world, 931 00:49:28,748 --> 00:49:30,183 but it's a secret and you can't tell anyone about it. 932 00:49:30,283 --> 00:49:31,818 But then... 933 00:49:31,918 --> 00:49:33,820 uh, the way that you smile, it's sort of like you are... 934 00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:36,656 you're letting us in on the secret, too. 935 00:49:36,756 --> 00:49:38,491 Um... 936 00:49:38,592 --> 00:49:40,760 ♪ He said ♪ 937 00:49:40,861 --> 00:49:42,662 ♪ There's nothing like your smile ♪ 938 00:49:42,762 --> 00:49:46,833 ♪ Sort of subtle and perfect and real ♪ 939 00:49:47,901 --> 00:49:52,939 ♪ He said you never knew how wonderful ♪ 940 00:49:53,039 --> 00:49:57,077 ♪ That smile could make someone feel ♪ 941 00:49:58,478 --> 00:50:02,282 ♪ And he knew whenever you get bored ♪ 942 00:50:02,382 --> 00:50:07,187 ♪ You scribble stars on the cuffs of your jeans ♪ 943 00:50:08,421 --> 00:50:12,826 ♪ And he noticed that you still fill out the quizzes ♪ 944 00:50:12,926 --> 00:50:15,729 ♪ That they put in those teen magazines ♪ 945 00:50:15,829 --> 00:50:17,697 I-I do that ironically. 946 00:50:17,797 --> 00:50:22,969 ♪ But he kept it all inside his head ♪ 947 00:50:23,069 --> 00:50:27,707 ♪ What he saw he left unsaid ♪ 948 00:50:27,807 --> 00:50:30,510 ♪ And though he wanted to ♪ 949 00:50:30,610 --> 00:50:32,212 ♪ He couldn't talk to you ♪ 950 00:50:32,313 --> 00:50:35,715 ♪ He couldn't find a way ♪ 951 00:50:37,318 --> 00:50:41,821 ♪ But he would always say ♪ 952 00:50:41,922 --> 00:50:45,558 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 953 00:50:45,659 --> 00:50:47,627 ♪ Tell her everything I see ♪ 954 00:50:47,727 --> 00:50:50,398 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 955 00:50:50,497 --> 00:50:53,600 ♪ How she's everything to me ♪ 956 00:50:53,700 --> 00:50:58,538 ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 957 00:50:59,673 --> 00:51:03,810 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 958 00:51:03,910 --> 00:51:08,081 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 959 00:51:08,882 --> 00:51:14,487 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 960 00:51:15,755 --> 00:51:18,224 Did he say anything else? 961 00:51:18,326 --> 00:51:19,659 About you? 962 00:51:19,759 --> 00:51:21,161 N-Never mind. I don't even care, all right? 963 00:51:21,261 --> 00:51:22,729 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. He said so many things. 964 00:51:22,829 --> 00:51:24,130 I'm trying to... I'm just... 965 00:51:24,230 --> 00:51:26,066 I'm trying to remember the best ones, so... 966 00:51:26,166 --> 00:51:27,267 Um... 967 00:51:27,368 --> 00:51:31,204 ♪ He thought it looked pretty cool ♪ 968 00:51:31,305 --> 00:51:34,808 ♪ When you put indigo streaks in your hair ♪ 969 00:51:34,908 --> 00:51:36,977 No fucking way. 970 00:51:37,077 --> 00:51:40,780 ♪ And he wondered how you learned to dance ♪ 971 00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:46,686 ♪ Like all the rest of the world isn't there ♪ 972 00:51:46,786 --> 00:51:51,725 ♪ But he kept it all inside his head ♪ 973 00:51:51,825 --> 00:51:56,496 ♪ What he saw he left unsaid ♪ 974 00:51:56,596 --> 00:51:59,532 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 975 00:51:59,632 --> 00:52:01,469 ♪ Tell her everything I see ♪ 976 00:52:01,568 --> 00:52:04,004 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 977 00:52:04,104 --> 00:52:06,374 ♪ How she's everything to me ♪ 978 00:52:06,474 --> 00:52:11,945 ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 979 00:52:13,713 --> 00:52:17,717 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 980 00:52:17,817 --> 00:52:22,088 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 981 00:52:22,889 --> 00:52:25,091 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 982 00:52:25,191 --> 00:52:30,364 ♪ But what do you do when there's this great divide? ♪ 983 00:52:30,464 --> 00:52:35,068 ♪ He just seemed so far away ♪ 984 00:52:35,168 --> 00:52:39,272 ♪ And what do you do when the distance is too wide? ♪ 985 00:52:39,373 --> 00:52:40,673 ♪ It's like I don't know anything ♪ 986 00:52:40,774 --> 00:52:42,842 ♪ How do you say ♪ 987 00:52:42,942 --> 00:52:47,113 ♪ I love you? ♪ 988 00:52:47,881 --> 00:52:51,818 ♪ I love you ♪ 989 00:52:52,585 --> 00:52:57,291 ♪ I love you ♪ 990 00:52:58,292 --> 00:53:02,695 ♪ I love you ♪ 991 00:53:05,765 --> 00:53:13,139 ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 992 00:53:14,908 --> 00:53:18,678 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 993 00:53:20,381 --> 00:53:26,252 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 994 00:53:26,353 --> 00:53:30,757 ♪ If I could. ♪ 995 00:53:35,563 --> 00:53:37,764 Hello. 996 00:53:37,864 --> 00:53:39,699 - Oh, sorry. - Uh... 997 00:53:39,799 --> 00:53:41,968 Oh, you beat us. 998 00:53:42,068 --> 00:53:43,636 Um, Zoe, can you help serve? 999 00:53:43,736 --> 00:53:45,271 - Yeah. - Larry, get the plates. 1000 00:53:45,372 --> 00:53:46,706 Can I do anything? 1001 00:53:46,806 --> 00:53:48,074 No, no, no. You're the guest. You sit down. 1002 00:53:48,174 --> 00:53:50,243 We asked if they had any soy ice cream, 1003 00:53:50,344 --> 00:53:54,582 but the guy at the store said there was just no "whey," so... 1004 00:53:54,681 --> 00:53:56,082 When are you gonna give up that joke? 1005 00:53:56,182 --> 00:53:57,884 I think never, actually. 1006 00:53:57,984 --> 00:53:59,252 You don't have to laugh at that. Please don't. 1007 00:53:59,353 --> 00:54:00,588 Oh. 1008 00:54:00,687 --> 00:54:03,123 I'm sorry, but there's no way 1009 00:54:03,223 --> 00:54:05,593 you'd ever be able to tell in a million years 1010 00:54:05,692 --> 00:54:06,860 that this was gluten-free. 1011 00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:08,761 Mom, come on. Look at it. 1012 00:54:08,862 --> 00:54:11,599 A million years is, uh... that's a lot of years. 1013 00:54:11,698 --> 00:54:14,267 Do you see what I have to deal with? 1014 00:54:15,336 --> 00:54:16,437 I'm glad you're here. 1015 00:54:44,931 --> 00:54:46,900 "The Connor Project." 1016 00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:48,801 So, it's a student group dedicated to 1017 00:54:48,902 --> 00:54:52,105 mental health awareness, outreach and education. 1018 00:54:53,006 --> 00:54:55,409 Uh, great. This is... it's great. 1019 00:54:57,143 --> 00:54:58,745 You know the Murphys, right? 1020 00:54:58,845 --> 00:55:00,980 - Mm-hmm. - I was wondering if 1021 00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:02,849 you would reach out to them and get their blessing. 1022 00:55:02,949 --> 00:55:05,885 Oh, well, I don't... I-I don't, I don't, um... 1023 00:55:05,985 --> 00:55:07,655 You want to help the Murphys? 1024 00:55:07,754 --> 00:55:10,790 And all the other people who might need it, 1025 00:55:10,890 --> 00:55:12,326 like people like Connor. 1026 00:55:12,426 --> 00:55:14,328 Or... 1027 00:55:14,428 --> 00:55:15,795 people like us. 1028 00:55:15,895 --> 00:55:17,997 "People like us"? 1029 00:55:19,633 --> 00:55:22,570 Yes, right, because we have so much in common. 1030 00:55:22,670 --> 00:55:23,937 What? 1031 00:55:24,737 --> 00:55:26,340 Well, you're, like, the president 1032 00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:28,241 of a m-million different groups at school, 1033 00:55:28,342 --> 00:55:30,444 and you're, like, part of every single activity. 1034 00:55:30,544 --> 00:55:33,813 And you're, you know, and I'm... 1035 00:55:33,913 --> 00:55:35,949 um, I am not. 1036 00:55:36,916 --> 00:55:38,485 What do you take? 1037 00:55:42,389 --> 00:55:44,592 Okay, I'll go first. 1038 00:55:44,692 --> 00:55:46,893 I'm on Lexapro, ten milligrams. 1039 00:55:49,128 --> 00:55:50,497 Oh. 1040 00:55:51,998 --> 00:55:55,502 Well, I'm-I'm on Zoloft. 1041 00:55:55,603 --> 00:55:57,338 Uh, and Wellbutrin. 1042 00:55:59,373 --> 00:56:01,207 And, um... 1043 00:56:01,308 --> 00:56:03,109 Ativan as needed. 1044 00:56:03,876 --> 00:56:07,013 Depression? Anxiety? 1045 00:56:08,349 --> 00:56:09,749 Yeah. 1046 00:56:10,517 --> 00:56:12,752 Yeah, me, too. 1047 00:56:14,588 --> 00:56:16,523 Some days, it's just like, um... 1048 00:56:17,890 --> 00:56:19,627 It's like, um... 1049 00:56:19,727 --> 00:56:20,694 Impossible? 1050 00:56:20,793 --> 00:56:23,330 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1051 00:56:24,864 --> 00:56:27,534 You know, you don't really act like a... 1052 00:56:28,702 --> 00:56:30,270 ...depressed sort of person. 1053 00:56:30,371 --> 00:56:34,475 I'm just good at staying anonymous. 1054 00:56:36,677 --> 00:56:38,077 Same as you. 1055 00:56:40,547 --> 00:56:43,850 There are a lot of people who feel like us. 1056 00:56:45,952 --> 00:56:48,522 People that you wouldn't think. 1057 00:56:52,058 --> 00:56:53,960 ♪ You ever look at all the people ♪ 1058 00:56:54,060 --> 00:56:57,997 ♪ Who seem to know exactly how to be? ♪ 1059 00:57:00,768 --> 00:57:04,672 ♪ You think, "They don't need piles of prescriptions ♪ 1060 00:57:04,772 --> 00:57:06,440 ♪ To function naturally" ♪ 1061 00:57:08,575 --> 00:57:11,811 ♪ Well, look again and you might catch it ♪ 1062 00:57:11,911 --> 00:57:14,280 ♪ Just stay a minute more ♪ 1063 00:57:15,549 --> 00:57:19,886 ♪ There's this little moment after the sunny smile ♪ 1064 00:57:19,986 --> 00:57:24,257 ♪ As their eyes fall to the floor ♪ 1065 00:57:24,358 --> 00:57:27,461 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 1066 00:57:27,561 --> 00:57:32,999 ♪ Who never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 1067 00:57:33,933 --> 00:57:37,136 ♪ All of those anonymous ones ♪ 1068 00:57:37,236 --> 00:57:42,141 ♪ Who never name that quiet pain they bury ♪ 1069 00:57:43,377 --> 00:57:46,179 ♪ So they keep on keeping secrets ♪ 1070 00:57:46,279 --> 00:57:48,981 ♪ That they think they have to hide ♪ 1071 00:57:49,082 --> 00:57:50,983 ♪ But what if everybody's secret ♪ 1072 00:57:51,084 --> 00:57:53,252 ♪ Is they have that secret side? ♪ 1073 00:57:53,354 --> 00:57:57,491 ♪ And to know they're somehow not alone ♪ 1074 00:57:57,591 --> 00:58:00,993 ♪ Well, that's all they're hoping for ♪ 1075 00:58:01,094 --> 00:58:03,597 ♪ What if they ♪ 1076 00:58:03,697 --> 00:58:06,533 ♪ Didn't have to stay ♪ 1077 00:58:07,668 --> 00:58:09,603 ♪ Anonymous anymore? ♪ 1078 00:58:16,643 --> 00:58:20,314 ♪ Spot the girl who stays in motion ♪ 1079 00:58:20,414 --> 00:58:23,617 ♪ She spins so fast so she won't fall ♪ 1080 00:58:23,717 --> 00:58:26,820 ♪ She's built a wall with her achievements ♪ 1081 00:58:26,919 --> 00:58:28,622 ♪ To keep out the question ♪ 1082 00:58:28,722 --> 00:58:33,126 ♪ Without it, is she worth anything at all? ♪ 1083 00:58:33,226 --> 00:58:36,929 ♪ So nobody can know ♪ 1084 00:58:37,765 --> 00:58:42,068 ♪ Just what the cracks might show ♪ 1085 00:58:42,168 --> 00:58:48,342 ♪ How deep and dark they go ♪ 1086 00:58:48,442 --> 00:58:51,512 ♪ There are those anonymous ones ♪ 1087 00:58:51,612 --> 00:58:55,948 ♪ Stuck inside the perfect frame they're faking ♪ 1088 00:58:57,351 --> 00:59:00,253 ♪ All of us anonymous ones ♪ 1089 00:59:00,354 --> 00:59:05,392 ♪ Who pick themselves apart till they start breaking ♪ 1090 00:59:06,360 --> 00:59:08,862 ♪ And we keep on keeping secrets ♪ 1091 00:59:08,961 --> 00:59:11,030 ♪ That we think we have to hide ♪ 1092 00:59:11,130 --> 00:59:13,434 ♪ But what we really need is somebody ♪ 1093 00:59:13,534 --> 00:59:15,502 ♪ To see that secret side ♪ 1094 00:59:15,602 --> 00:59:19,172 ♪ And to know we're somehow not alone ♪ 1095 00:59:19,272 --> 00:59:22,074 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 1096 00:59:22,175 --> 00:59:26,279 ♪ And then we wouldn't have to be ♪ 1097 00:59:26,380 --> 00:59:28,482 ♪ Anonymous anymore ♪ 1098 00:59:34,721 --> 00:59:36,824 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1099 00:59:36,924 --> 00:59:39,460 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1100 00:59:39,560 --> 00:59:41,795 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1101 00:59:41,895 --> 00:59:44,398 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1102 00:59:44,498 --> 00:59:47,233 ♪ The anonymous one ♪ 1103 00:59:47,334 --> 00:59:50,002 ♪ Noticed by none ♪ 1104 00:59:51,839 --> 00:59:53,507 Go, Bobcats! 1105 00:59:53,607 --> 00:59:57,243 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1106 00:59:57,344 --> 01:00:00,848 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy. ♪ 1107 01:00:20,266 --> 01:00:21,702 "The Connor Project"? 1108 01:00:21,802 --> 01:00:23,169 Yeah, so it's a student group 1109 01:00:23,269 --> 01:00:26,306 dedicated to keeping Connor's memory alive. 1110 01:00:26,406 --> 01:00:28,775 Um, making sure people that need help, 1111 01:00:28,876 --> 01:00:30,310 they have somewhere they can go. 1112 01:00:30,410 --> 01:00:33,647 I didn't realize Connor meant this much to people. 1113 01:00:33,747 --> 01:00:35,916 Well, it's all... I mean, it was all Alana's idea. 1114 01:00:36,015 --> 01:00:37,083 She thought of the whole thing. 1115 01:00:37,183 --> 01:00:38,452 That's the young woman 1116 01:00:38,552 --> 01:00:40,754 who organized the memorial tomorrow. 1117 01:00:40,854 --> 01:00:43,189 - Mm-hmm. - Well, she seems like... 1118 01:00:43,290 --> 01:00:45,124 - quite a force. - Yeah. 1119 01:00:45,224 --> 01:00:47,427 Um, anyways, um... 1120 01:00:47,528 --> 01:00:49,296 we just wanted to do something. 1121 01:00:49,396 --> 01:00:52,399 It's-it's r-really cool. 1122 01:00:56,770 --> 01:00:59,071 There's something I want to show you. 1123 01:00:59,873 --> 01:01:01,140 Sure. 1124 01:01:03,175 --> 01:01:05,244 Oh, here we go. 1125 01:01:06,513 --> 01:01:08,615 It's a bit of a mess, I know. 1126 01:01:08,715 --> 01:01:13,754 We still haven't decided what to do with, um, everything. 1127 01:01:16,088 --> 01:01:19,459 Oh, um... he used to write songs. 1128 01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:21,160 Or at least he told us he did. 1129 01:01:21,260 --> 01:01:23,497 He refused to play for us, so who knows? 1130 01:01:24,831 --> 01:01:27,801 He never played any for you? 1131 01:01:28,802 --> 01:01:30,304 No, he di... he didn't. 1132 01:01:30,404 --> 01:01:32,639 He... No. I'm sorry. 1133 01:01:35,709 --> 01:01:36,810 Um... 1134 01:01:47,321 --> 01:01:49,255 Here it is. 1135 01:01:50,791 --> 01:01:53,060 It's a... 1136 01:01:53,159 --> 01:01:56,128 When Connor entered seventh grade, 1137 01:01:56,228 --> 01:01:58,465 all of my girlfriends said, 1138 01:01:58,565 --> 01:02:00,434 "Here it comes, Bar Mitzvah season. 1139 01:02:00,534 --> 01:02:04,404 He's gonna have a different party every Saturday." 1140 01:02:04,504 --> 01:02:06,540 And Larry was so excited to take him shopping. 1141 01:02:06,640 --> 01:02:08,342 He dragged him to Brooks Brothers, 1142 01:02:08,442 --> 01:02:11,545 and they picked out a suit, some shirts and this tie. 1143 01:02:11,645 --> 01:02:16,316 He looked... just like his dad. 1144 01:02:21,388 --> 01:02:24,156 He never got invited to a single party. 1145 01:02:29,329 --> 01:02:33,165 He was such a sweet boy underneath it all. 1146 01:02:34,635 --> 01:02:37,804 Everything just hurt too much. 1147 01:02:40,641 --> 01:02:44,243 I thought that, uh, you could wear this to the memorial. 1148 01:02:44,344 --> 01:02:46,212 For your speech. 1149 01:02:48,048 --> 01:02:50,684 Oh, I'm not... I-I... 1150 01:02:50,784 --> 01:02:52,853 I wasn't... I'm-I'm not speaking. 1151 01:02:52,953 --> 01:02:54,388 Why not? 1152 01:02:54,488 --> 01:02:58,224 Well, I... I just don't think, um... 1153 01:03:00,226 --> 01:03:02,462 I mean, most people think that I'm... 1154 01:03:03,330 --> 01:03:04,598 ...not that cool of a person, 1155 01:03:04,698 --> 01:03:07,668 so nobody wants to hear from me. 1156 01:03:10,236 --> 01:03:12,472 Well, if... 1157 01:03:12,572 --> 01:03:15,776 that's what most people think... 1158 01:03:16,743 --> 01:03:19,312 ...it sounds like most people don't know you very well. 1159 01:03:21,415 --> 01:03:23,383 They didn't know Connor either. 1160 01:03:24,418 --> 01:03:26,687 They never bothered. 1161 01:03:26,787 --> 01:03:28,355 Hmm. 1162 01:03:30,824 --> 01:03:33,259 You can tell them what they missed. 1163 01:03:40,500 --> 01:03:42,469 You're so handsome. 1164 01:04:18,805 --> 01:04:22,241 I'm so glad you changed your mind. 1165 01:04:32,552 --> 01:04:37,157 Today is a day of remembrance and reflection. 1166 01:04:37,256 --> 01:04:39,025 It sucks he isn't here to see this. 1167 01:04:39,126 --> 01:04:41,260 The first person we'll hear from this morning 1168 01:04:41,361 --> 01:04:43,663 is Evan Hansen. 1169 01:05:01,280 --> 01:05:03,517 Uh, good morning, s... 1170 01:05:03,617 --> 01:05:06,286 Holy shit. 1171 01:05:08,355 --> 01:05:09,890 Sorry. 1172 01:05:09,990 --> 01:05:11,725 Sorry. 1173 01:05:13,894 --> 01:05:17,164 Good morning, students and faculty. 1174 01:05:17,264 --> 01:05:20,734 I would like to say a few words to you today... 1175 01:05:22,636 --> 01:05:24,437 ...about my friend... 1176 01:05:25,806 --> 01:05:29,242 ...my best friend, Connor Murphy. 1177 01:05:29,342 --> 01:05:30,443 Holy shit. 1178 01:05:32,078 --> 01:05:33,947 I would like to tell you about the day that Connor and I 1179 01:05:34,047 --> 01:05:37,551 went hiking behind the old Autumn Smile Apple Orchard. 1180 01:05:37,651 --> 01:05:40,086 We found a huge oak tree. 1181 01:05:40,187 --> 01:05:42,222 Connor said that he wondered what the world would look like 1182 01:05:42,322 --> 01:05:46,560 from all the way up there, so we decided to find out. 1183 01:05:49,529 --> 01:05:51,731 We started climbing slowly. 1184 01:05:51,832 --> 01:05:53,700 And then, when I finally looked back, 1185 01:05:53,800 --> 01:05:55,635 we were already 30 feet off the ground. 1186 01:05:55,735 --> 01:05:57,971 Um, Connor just looked at me... 1187 01:05:59,639 --> 01:06:02,142 ...and smiled that way he always did. 1188 01:06:02,242 --> 01:06:04,544 Um, and then... 1189 01:06:13,486 --> 01:06:15,055 Um... 1190 01:06:16,156 --> 01:06:17,490 Sorry. Then I fell. 1191 01:06:17,591 --> 01:06:19,659 I-I lay there on the ground and... 1192 01:06:19,759 --> 01:06:23,196 Good morning, students and f-f... faculty. 1193 01:06:25,398 --> 01:06:27,601 Sorry, that... 1194 01:06:27,701 --> 01:06:29,102 Sorry, that's the wrong... 1195 01:07:26,927 --> 01:07:31,698 ♪ Have you ever felt like nobody was there? ♪ 1196 01:07:33,600 --> 01:07:40,073 ♪ Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? ♪ 1197 01:07:41,041 --> 01:07:45,078 ♪ Have you ever felt like you could disappear? ♪ 1198 01:07:46,813 --> 01:07:48,715 ♪ Like you could fall ♪ 1199 01:07:49,783 --> 01:07:52,085 ♪ And no one would hear ♪ 1200 01:07:54,587 --> 01:07:57,891 But, see, the thing is, when I looked up, Connor was there. 1201 01:07:59,993 --> 01:08:02,195 That's the gift he gave me. 1202 01:08:02,996 --> 01:08:05,031 To show me th-that I wasn't alone. 1203 01:08:05,131 --> 01:08:06,300 Um, nobody is. 1204 01:08:06,400 --> 01:08:09,569 That's-that's the gift that he gave all of us. 1205 01:08:09,669 --> 01:08:11,905 I just wish... 1206 01:08:13,673 --> 01:08:15,608 I wish we could've given that to him. 1207 01:08:18,412 --> 01:08:19,646 So... 1208 01:08:19,746 --> 01:08:24,117 ♪ Let that lonely feeling wash away ♪ 1209 01:08:25,453 --> 01:08:31,191 ♪ Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay ♪ 1210 01:08:31,292 --> 01:08:36,730 ♪ 'Cause when you don't feel strong enough to stand ♪ 1211 01:08:36,830 --> 01:08:42,736 ♪ You can reach, reach out your hand ♪ 1212 01:08:43,837 --> 01:08:49,175 ♪ And, oh, someone will come running ♪ 1213 01:08:49,275 --> 01:08:55,181 ♪ And I know they'll take you home ♪ 1214 01:08:57,817 --> 01:09:00,920 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1215 01:09:01,021 --> 01:09:04,157 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 1216 01:09:04,257 --> 01:09:08,362 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 1217 01:09:08,462 --> 01:09:10,897 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1218 01:09:10,997 --> 01:09:13,434 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1219 01:09:13,533 --> 01:09:16,870 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1220 01:09:16,970 --> 01:09:19,906 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 1221 01:09:20,907 --> 01:09:25,845 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1222 01:09:26,613 --> 01:09:31,151 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1223 01:09:31,918 --> 01:09:36,689 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1224 01:09:37,458 --> 01:09:42,195 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1225 01:09:42,962 --> 01:09:45,265 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1226 01:09:56,009 --> 01:09:57,610 Have you seen this? 1227 01:09:57,710 --> 01:09:59,045 People started sharing it, 1228 01:09:59,145 --> 01:10:00,880 and now, I mean, it's everywhere. 1229 01:10:00,980 --> 01:10:02,682 This morning, it only had, like, 30 views. 1230 01:10:02,782 --> 01:10:04,385 Well, how many does it have now? 1231 01:10:04,485 --> 01:10:06,586 723. 1232 01:10:06,686 --> 01:10:09,656 2,326 views. 1233 01:10:09,756 --> 01:10:12,125 14,359. 1234 01:10:12,225 --> 01:10:15,296 I don't understand what happened. 1235 01:10:15,396 --> 01:10:16,963 You did. 1236 01:10:18,631 --> 01:10:22,268 ♪ There's a place where we don't have to feel unknown ♪ 1237 01:10:22,369 --> 01:10:23,404 Oh, my God. 1238 01:10:23,504 --> 01:10:24,804 Everybody needs to see this. 1239 01:10:24,904 --> 01:10:26,806 ♪ And every time that you call out ♪ 1240 01:10:26,906 --> 01:10:28,842 ♪ You're a little less alone ♪ 1241 01:10:28,942 --> 01:10:30,777 - I can't stop watching this video. - ...17 years old. 1242 01:10:30,877 --> 01:10:32,946 ♪ If you only say the word ♪ 1243 01:10:33,046 --> 01:10:34,614 - Take five minutes. - It'll make your day. 1244 01:10:34,714 --> 01:10:40,488 ♪ From across the silence, your voice is heard ♪ 1245 01:10:40,588 --> 01:10:41,754 ♪ Oh ♪ 1246 01:10:41,855 --> 01:10:43,189 Share it with the people you love. 1247 01:10:43,290 --> 01:10:45,459 - Repost. - The world needs to hear this. 1248 01:10:45,559 --> 01:10:46,960 Beautiful tribute. 1249 01:10:47,060 --> 01:10:49,062 I know someone who really needed to hear this today. 1250 01:10:49,162 --> 01:10:51,798 So thank you, Evan Hansen, for doing what you're doing. 1251 01:10:51,898 --> 01:10:54,801 I never met you, Connor, but coming on here, 1252 01:10:54,901 --> 01:10:56,102 reading everyone's posts... 1253 01:10:56,202 --> 01:10:58,138 Evan is exactly right. We are not alone. 1254 01:10:58,238 --> 01:10:59,573 We are not alone. 1255 01:10:59,672 --> 01:11:00,740 None of us. 1256 01:11:00,840 --> 01:11:01,875 None of us are alone. 1257 01:11:01,975 --> 01:11:03,544 - Like. - Forward. - Especially now, 1258 01:11:03,676 --> 01:11:04,944 with everything you hear on the news. 1259 01:11:05,044 --> 01:11:06,480 - Like. - Share. - Repost. - Forward. 1260 01:11:06,580 --> 01:11:07,881 Thank you, Evan Hansen, 1261 01:11:07,981 --> 01:11:09,383 for giving us a space to remember Connor. 1262 01:11:09,483 --> 01:11:11,050 - Thanks to Evan. - To be together. 1263 01:11:11,151 --> 01:11:12,018 - Thanks for helping my mom. - Thank you for helping my mom. 1264 01:11:12,118 --> 01:11:13,420 Thank you, Evan Hansen. 1265 01:11:13,521 --> 01:11:14,687 - ♪ To take you home... ♪ - Vermont. - Tampa. 1266 01:11:14,787 --> 01:11:16,055 - Sacramento. - Michigan. 1267 01:11:16,156 --> 01:11:17,223 - ♪ Someone will come... ♪ - Just reach out. 1268 01:11:17,324 --> 01:11:18,392 Thank you, Evan. 1269 01:11:18,492 --> 01:11:19,726 This is about community and friendship. 1270 01:11:19,826 --> 01:11:20,693 - Thank you, Evan. - Thank you. 1271 01:11:21,828 --> 01:11:23,229 Thank you, Evan Hansen. 1272 01:11:23,330 --> 01:11:26,433 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1273 01:11:26,534 --> 01:11:29,802 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 1274 01:11:29,903 --> 01:11:32,839 ♪ When you're broken on the ground ♪ 1275 01:11:32,939 --> 01:11:35,074 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1276 01:11:35,175 --> 01:11:37,378 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1277 01:11:37,478 --> 01:11:40,780 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1278 01:11:40,880 --> 01:11:43,850 ♪ If you only look around ♪ 1279 01:11:43,950 --> 01:11:49,390 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 1280 01:11:49,490 --> 01:11:50,924 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1281 01:11:51,024 --> 01:11:56,129 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 1282 01:11:56,229 --> 01:12:01,034 ♪ Out of the shadows, the morning is breaking ♪ 1283 01:12:01,134 --> 01:12:04,505 ♪ And all is new ♪ 1284 01:12:04,605 --> 01:12:07,207 ♪ All is new ♪ 1285 01:12:07,308 --> 01:12:10,377 ♪ It's filling up the empty ♪ 1286 01:12:10,477 --> 01:12:12,879 ♪ And suddenly I see ♪ 1287 01:12:12,979 --> 01:12:14,914 ♪ That all is new ♪ 1288 01:12:15,014 --> 01:12:18,051 ♪ All is new ♪ 1289 01:12:18,151 --> 01:12:22,889 ♪ You are not alone, you are not alone ♪ 1290 01:12:22,989 --> 01:12:26,092 ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1291 01:12:26,192 --> 01:12:30,431 ♪ You are not alone, you are not alone ♪ 1292 01:12:30,531 --> 01:12:32,600 - ♪ You are not alone ♪ - ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1293 01:12:32,700 --> 01:12:33,866 ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1294 01:12:33,967 --> 01:12:35,569 ♪ You are not ♪ 1295 01:12:35,669 --> 01:12:40,039 - ♪ You are not alone ♪ - ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1296 01:12:40,139 --> 01:12:42,842 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1297 01:12:42,942 --> 01:12:45,945 ♪ When you need someone to carry you ♪ 1298 01:12:46,045 --> 01:12:48,848 ♪ When you're broken on the ground ♪ 1299 01:12:48,948 --> 01:12:51,150 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1300 01:12:51,251 --> 01:12:53,520 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1301 01:12:53,621 --> 01:12:56,789 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1302 01:12:56,889 --> 01:12:59,993 ♪ If you only look around ♪ 1303 01:13:00,093 --> 01:13:02,161 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1304 01:13:02,262 --> 01:13:05,965 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1305 01:13:06,065 --> 01:13:07,468 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1306 01:13:07,568 --> 01:13:10,604 ♪ When you need someone to carry you ♪ 1307 01:13:10,704 --> 01:13:15,409 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1308 01:13:16,175 --> 01:13:20,280 ♪ You will be found. ♪ 1309 01:13:29,523 --> 01:13:30,790 Hey. 1310 01:13:30,890 --> 01:13:32,825 What's wrong? 1311 01:13:34,927 --> 01:13:37,498 Everything you said in your speech. 1312 01:13:37,598 --> 01:13:40,066 Everything you've done. 1313 01:13:40,166 --> 01:13:42,835 You don't know how much... 1314 01:13:42,935 --> 01:13:45,739 you've given all of us. 1315 01:13:45,838 --> 01:13:47,173 My family. 1316 01:13:47,273 --> 01:13:48,808 Me. 1317 01:13:48,908 --> 01:13:50,544 No. 1318 01:13:50,644 --> 01:13:52,145 No, I... 1319 01:13:52,245 --> 01:13:55,281 You've given me my brother back. 1320 01:14:43,797 --> 01:14:45,965 Welcome to the first official meeting 1321 01:14:46,065 --> 01:14:47,768 of The Connor Project. 1322 01:14:52,038 --> 01:14:53,574 Right? 1323 01:14:54,308 --> 01:14:58,144 Um, now, as you all know from Evan's speech, 1324 01:14:58,244 --> 01:15:00,848 uh, Connor's favorite place in the entire world 1325 01:15:00,947 --> 01:15:02,850 was the Autumn Smile Apple Orchard. 1326 01:15:02,949 --> 01:15:05,519 I am beyond excited to announce that, 1327 01:15:05,619 --> 01:15:07,887 in addition to our support groups, we will be launching 1328 01:15:07,987 --> 01:15:13,159 a Kickstarter campaign to raise $100,000 to reopen and redesign 1329 01:15:13,259 --> 01:15:16,430 Autumn Smile as the Connor Murphy Memorial Orchard. 1330 01:15:18,898 --> 01:15:22,770 Um, so to explain what we're going to be asking of you, 1331 01:15:22,870 --> 01:15:24,170 I'm gonna turn things over 1332 01:15:24,270 --> 01:15:27,508 to our director of global communications. 1333 01:15:27,608 --> 01:15:29,208 Thanks, Alana. 1334 01:15:29,309 --> 01:15:30,577 So great. 1335 01:15:30,677 --> 01:15:32,912 Our new website is now live. 1336 01:15:33,012 --> 01:15:34,848 If you have not yet read 1337 01:15:34,947 --> 01:15:37,751 the emails between Evan and Connor... 1338 01:15:37,851 --> 01:15:40,987 oh, you're gonna want to grab some tissues. 1339 01:15:44,391 --> 01:15:48,762 I swear, I've got a Cal Ripken here somewhere. 1340 01:15:48,862 --> 01:15:51,164 Look at that, hmm? 1341 01:15:51,964 --> 01:15:54,000 The entire '96 team. 1342 01:15:54,100 --> 01:15:55,402 There's three Hall of Famers on there. 1343 01:15:55,502 --> 01:15:57,069 - Wow. - You get the right people, 1344 01:15:57,170 --> 01:15:59,473 baseball fans, uh, you could raise 1345 01:15:59,573 --> 01:16:01,875 at least a few hundred bucks for the orchard, 1346 01:16:01,974 --> 01:16:03,510 maybe a couple thousand. 1347 01:16:03,610 --> 01:16:05,312 Yeah, but... 1348 01:16:05,412 --> 01:16:08,782 I mean, you should, you should probably keep all this stuff. 1349 01:16:08,882 --> 01:16:12,118 Oh, uh, it's just gonna sit here gathering dust. 1350 01:16:15,021 --> 01:16:17,023 Uh, stiff as a board, isn't it? 1351 01:16:17,123 --> 01:16:18,958 Yeah. 1352 01:16:19,058 --> 01:16:20,327 Well, it's never been used. 1353 01:16:20,427 --> 01:16:21,728 Connor... 1354 01:16:22,896 --> 01:16:24,898 ...he loved baseball. 1355 01:16:24,997 --> 01:16:27,233 When he was little. 1356 01:16:27,334 --> 01:16:29,369 First time I met him, uh... 1357 01:16:29,470 --> 01:16:31,572 Cynthia wasn't sure how the kids would react, all right? 1358 01:16:31,672 --> 01:16:32,840 She was terrified. 1359 01:16:32,940 --> 01:16:35,776 And I was terrified. 1360 01:16:35,876 --> 01:16:37,778 I mean... 1361 01:16:37,878 --> 01:16:39,613 five minutes in... 1362 01:16:41,381 --> 01:16:45,385 Connor's, like, pulling my arm, uh... 1363 01:16:46,320 --> 01:16:48,755 "Come on, let's go play catch." 1364 01:16:50,390 --> 01:16:52,124 He... 1365 01:16:55,662 --> 01:16:58,231 I bought that... I don't know... two years ago. 1366 01:16:58,332 --> 01:17:01,635 I thought, you know, maybe we could... 1367 01:17:08,241 --> 01:17:09,409 So stupid. 1368 01:17:09,510 --> 01:17:13,347 He was really lucky to have a step... 1369 01:17:15,415 --> 01:17:17,518 ...to have a dad like you. 1370 01:17:19,252 --> 01:17:23,089 Your dad must feel pretty lucky to... 1371 01:17:24,123 --> 01:17:26,092 ...have a son like you. 1372 01:17:28,829 --> 01:17:30,697 Yeah, he does. 1373 01:18:06,400 --> 01:18:09,403 You know, I-I saw the strangest thing 1374 01:18:09,503 --> 01:18:11,672 - on-on Facebook yesterday. - Really? 1375 01:18:11,772 --> 01:18:16,677 Um, somebody had a video of you doing a speech. 1376 01:18:17,477 --> 01:18:21,848 About that boy, Connor Murphy. 1377 01:18:21,949 --> 01:18:25,786 How the two of you climbed a tree together 1378 01:18:25,886 --> 01:18:27,654 at an orchard. 1379 01:18:29,221 --> 01:18:31,758 You told me that you didn't know him, but in the speech, 1380 01:18:31,858 --> 01:18:33,827 you said that he was your best friend. 1381 01:18:33,927 --> 01:18:35,227 Right, well... 1382 01:18:36,228 --> 01:18:37,798 ...'cause that wasn't true. 1383 01:18:37,898 --> 01:18:39,299 Um... 1384 01:18:42,101 --> 01:18:43,704 When I said I didn't know him. 1385 01:18:43,804 --> 01:18:45,237 Mm. 1386 01:18:45,339 --> 01:18:48,775 I thought that you broke your arm at-at work. 1387 01:18:48,875 --> 01:18:51,277 Okay, well, who do you think drove me to urgent care 1388 01:18:51,378 --> 01:18:52,980 and-and waited there with me? 1389 01:18:53,080 --> 01:18:54,681 You were at work. You remember? 1390 01:18:54,781 --> 01:18:56,182 I couldn't even... You didn't, you didn't answer your phone. 1391 01:18:56,282 --> 01:18:57,951 You-you told me that your boss took you. 1392 01:18:58,051 --> 01:18:59,453 Well, so I lied, obviously. 1393 01:18:59,553 --> 01:19:01,955 So when were you planning on telling me any of this? 1394 01:19:02,055 --> 01:19:03,890 When would I tell you exactly? When are you even here? 1395 01:19:03,991 --> 01:19:06,460 - I'm here now. - Okay. 1396 01:19:07,527 --> 01:19:10,530 You know, I-I-I talked to Dr. Sherman, and he told me 1397 01:19:10,631 --> 01:19:12,131 - you've been skipping appointments. - I missed one. 1398 01:19:12,231 --> 01:19:14,401 You know those aren't free. 1399 01:19:19,773 --> 01:19:21,908 Sorry. I'm sorry. 1400 01:19:22,909 --> 01:19:25,177 I'm... 1401 01:19:26,713 --> 01:19:29,683 I'm so happy you had a friend, sweetheart. 1402 01:19:31,084 --> 01:19:32,819 I'm sorry he's gone. 1403 01:19:32,919 --> 01:19:34,821 I just wish I'd known. 1404 01:19:38,625 --> 01:19:40,861 That speech you gave, it... 1405 01:19:43,330 --> 01:19:45,732 I don't even know what to say. I'm... 1406 01:19:47,067 --> 01:19:48,935 I'm proud of you. 1407 01:19:51,872 --> 01:19:53,140 Thanks. 1408 01:20:08,755 --> 01:20:09,790 Hi. 1409 01:20:11,458 --> 01:20:13,360 This is a cool surprise. 1410 01:20:15,362 --> 01:20:17,196 Um... 1411 01:20:17,297 --> 01:20:19,299 Can I get you anything or...? 1412 01:20:19,399 --> 01:20:21,134 Just water. 1413 01:20:21,935 --> 01:20:24,705 - Just water? You're sure? - Yeah. That's perfect. 1414 01:20:25,706 --> 01:20:26,773 Coming up. 1415 01:20:31,210 --> 01:20:32,312 Where's your mom? 1416 01:20:32,412 --> 01:20:35,182 She works late on Fridays. 1417 01:20:35,281 --> 01:20:37,417 Oh. I wanted to meet her. 1418 01:20:37,517 --> 01:20:40,287 Yeah, that would've been great. 1419 01:20:43,824 --> 01:20:44,991 What's this? 1420 01:20:45,092 --> 01:20:46,693 Oh, it's just my mom is obsessed 1421 01:20:46,793 --> 01:20:48,795 with these college scholarship essay contests. 1422 01:20:48,895 --> 01:20:51,164 I mean, I'd-I'd-I'd have to win probably, like, all of them 1423 01:20:51,263 --> 01:20:55,267 to actually pay for college, so... 1424 01:20:56,603 --> 01:20:58,805 Your parents, they-they can't...? 1425 01:20:58,905 --> 01:21:00,874 Uh, not really. 1426 01:21:02,274 --> 01:21:03,677 I'm sorry. 1427 01:21:12,352 --> 01:21:14,654 Is your room upstairs? 1428 01:21:19,126 --> 01:21:20,894 Yeah. It's, um... 1429 01:21:23,363 --> 01:21:24,765 Yeah. 1430 01:21:32,038 --> 01:21:34,841 Yeah, so it's, like, a pretty standard sort of room, I guess. 1431 01:21:34,941 --> 01:21:36,176 So... 1432 01:21:36,275 --> 01:21:37,911 Hey. Oh, um... 1433 01:21:38,011 --> 01:21:39,780 actually, I meant to tell you this before. 1434 01:21:39,880 --> 01:21:42,682 Um, so Alana and I had a really good... 1435 01:21:43,817 --> 01:21:46,486 Um, we had a really good meeting this morning, 1436 01:21:46,586 --> 01:21:48,588 and I think that... y-you probably noticed, 1437 01:21:48,688 --> 01:21:51,258 um, that, uh, you know, a lot of people were giving, 1438 01:21:51,358 --> 01:21:54,060 uh, during that first week, which is definitely great, 1439 01:21:54,161 --> 01:21:56,630 but, um, it sort of slowed down a bit, obviously. 1440 01:21:56,730 --> 01:21:57,931 But Alana and I are really confident 1441 01:21:58,031 --> 01:21:59,466 that it's gonna pick right back up. 1442 01:21:59,566 --> 01:22:01,968 I think it's just a m... a matter of... 1443 01:22:02,769 --> 01:22:05,438 Can I talk to you about something? 1444 01:22:08,942 --> 01:22:10,510 Yes. 1445 01:22:14,581 --> 01:22:16,349 Uh... 1446 01:22:16,449 --> 01:22:18,752 The Connor Project is... awesome. 1447 01:22:18,852 --> 01:22:21,855 It's-it's really, really cool. 1448 01:22:21,955 --> 01:22:23,156 Oh. 1449 01:22:24,090 --> 01:22:26,560 - Thank you. - It's just that, my whole life, 1450 01:22:26,660 --> 01:22:28,261 everything has been about him. 1451 01:22:28,361 --> 01:22:31,965 And maybe the two of us... 1452 01:22:33,133 --> 01:22:35,936 ...maybe we don't have to talk about my brother all the time. 1453 01:22:36,036 --> 01:22:38,205 Maybe we can... 1454 01:22:38,306 --> 01:22:41,808 talk about other things. 1455 01:22:49,883 --> 01:22:51,184 I like you. 1456 01:22:53,453 --> 01:22:57,357 And it's not because you were friends with my brother 1457 01:22:57,457 --> 01:22:59,359 or because of The Connor Project. 1458 01:23:02,229 --> 01:23:04,698 I like you 'cause... 1459 01:23:04,798 --> 01:23:06,700 you. 1460 01:23:06,800 --> 01:23:11,404 ♪ I don't need you to sell me on reasons to want you ♪ 1461 01:23:13,473 --> 01:23:17,944 ♪ I don't need you to search for the proof that I should ♪ 1462 01:23:20,547 --> 01:23:24,017 ♪ You don't have to convince me ♪ 1463 01:23:24,117 --> 01:23:27,954 ♪ You don't have to be scared you're not enough ♪ 1464 01:23:28,054 --> 01:23:30,957 ♪ 'Cause what we've got going ♪ 1465 01:23:31,057 --> 01:23:33,426 ♪ Is good ♪ 1466 01:23:34,227 --> 01:23:38,899 ♪ I don't need more reminders of all that's been broken ♪ 1467 01:23:41,034 --> 01:23:46,039 ♪ I don't need you to fix what I'd rather forget ♪ 1468 01:23:47,607 --> 01:23:51,177 ♪ Clear the slate and start over ♪ 1469 01:23:51,278 --> 01:23:55,849 ♪ Try to quiet the noises in your head ♪ 1470 01:23:55,949 --> 01:23:59,185 ♪ We can't compete with all that ♪ 1471 01:24:01,655 --> 01:24:03,723 ♪ So what if it's us? ♪ 1472 01:24:03,823 --> 01:24:08,396 ♪ What if it's us and only us ♪ 1473 01:24:08,495 --> 01:24:13,633 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore or matter? ♪ 1474 01:24:13,733 --> 01:24:15,835 ♪ Can we try that? ♪ 1475 01:24:15,936 --> 01:24:19,139 ♪ What if it's you, what if it's me ♪ 1476 01:24:19,239 --> 01:24:23,109 ♪ And what if that's all that we need it to be ♪ 1477 01:24:23,209 --> 01:24:26,880 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away? ♪ 1478 01:24:27,814 --> 01:24:28,949 ♪ What do you say? ♪ 1479 01:24:29,049 --> 01:24:30,784 ♪ I never thought there'd be ♪ 1480 01:24:30,884 --> 01:24:33,920 ♪ Someone like you who would want me ♪ 1481 01:24:34,020 --> 01:24:34,988 Well... 1482 01:24:35,088 --> 01:24:38,392 ♪ So I give you 10,000 reasons ♪ 1483 01:24:38,491 --> 01:24:40,727 ♪ To not let me go ♪ 1484 01:24:42,829 --> 01:24:46,866 ♪ But if you really see me ♪ 1485 01:24:46,967 --> 01:24:51,137 ♪ If you like me for me and nothing else ♪ 1486 01:24:51,237 --> 01:24:53,006 ♪ Well, that's all that I've wanted ♪ 1487 01:24:53,106 --> 01:24:57,378 ♪ For longer than you could possibly know ♪ 1488 01:24:57,477 --> 01:24:59,380 ♪ So it can be us ♪ 1489 01:24:59,512 --> 01:25:04,184 ♪ It can be us and only us ♪ 1490 01:25:04,284 --> 01:25:09,457 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore or matter ♪ 1491 01:25:09,556 --> 01:25:11,224 ♪ We can try that ♪ 1492 01:25:11,325 --> 01:25:15,028 ♪ It's not so impossible ♪ 1493 01:25:15,128 --> 01:25:17,897 ♪ Nobody else but the two of us here ♪ 1494 01:25:17,998 --> 01:25:21,868 ♪ 'Cause you're saying it's possible ♪ 1495 01:25:21,968 --> 01:25:25,373 ♪ We can just watch the whole world disappear ♪ 1496 01:25:25,473 --> 01:25:30,677 ♪ Till you're the only one ♪ 1497 01:25:30,777 --> 01:25:37,717 ♪ I still know how to see ♪ 1498 01:25:40,854 --> 01:25:42,555 ♪ It's just you and me ♪ 1499 01:25:42,655 --> 01:25:44,891 ♪ It'll be us ♪ 1500 01:25:44,991 --> 01:25:49,896 ♪ It'll be us and only us ♪ 1501 01:25:49,996 --> 01:25:54,667 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore ♪ 1502 01:25:54,768 --> 01:25:57,371 ♪ We can try that ♪ 1503 01:25:57,471 --> 01:26:00,874 ♪ You and me ♪ 1504 01:26:00,974 --> 01:26:04,110 ♪ That's all that we need it to be ♪ 1505 01:26:04,210 --> 01:26:07,747 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away ♪ 1506 01:26:07,847 --> 01:26:14,054 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away ♪ 1507 01:26:15,855 --> 01:26:18,758 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1508 01:26:19,692 --> 01:26:22,896 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1509 01:26:28,735 --> 01:26:30,970 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1510 01:26:32,038 --> 01:26:35,041 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1511 01:26:35,842 --> 01:26:38,845 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1512 01:26:39,779 --> 01:26:42,882 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1513 01:26:50,458 --> 01:26:51,791 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1514 01:26:51,891 --> 01:26:53,893 All right, let's just start without him. 1515 01:26:53,993 --> 01:26:57,664 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1516 01:26:57,764 --> 01:27:03,837 ♪ And it's only us. ♪ 1517 01:27:20,019 --> 01:27:20,720 No. 1518 01:27:20,820 --> 01:27:22,021 I'm famous for doing that. 1519 01:27:22,122 --> 01:27:23,324 I've been told that many times. 1520 01:27:23,424 --> 01:27:24,325 Mm-hmm. 1521 01:27:24,425 --> 01:27:25,326 Hi, honey. 1522 01:27:25,426 --> 01:27:26,693 Come join us. 1523 01:27:26,793 --> 01:27:29,195 - I just put dinner in the oven. - Hi. 1524 01:27:31,332 --> 01:27:32,765 She made me swear to keep it a surprise. 1525 01:27:32,866 --> 01:27:34,267 I'm surprised. 1526 01:27:34,368 --> 01:27:35,503 Hi. 1527 01:27:35,603 --> 01:27:37,203 It's so nice to finally meet you. 1528 01:27:37,304 --> 01:27:38,671 - Oh, hi. - Hi. 1529 01:27:38,771 --> 01:27:40,407 Yeah, uh, great. 1530 01:27:40,508 --> 01:27:42,409 It's great. 1531 01:27:42,510 --> 01:27:44,144 Come on, Evan. Sit. 1532 01:27:45,945 --> 01:27:47,881 I-I thought that you were working tonight. 1533 01:27:47,981 --> 01:27:50,049 Cynthia called and invited me for dinner, 1534 01:27:50,150 --> 01:27:51,951 so, you know, I'm playing hooky. 1535 01:27:52,051 --> 01:27:54,154 We were just discussing how sneaky you and Connor were. 1536 01:27:54,254 --> 01:27:56,856 I had no idea that he and Connor were even friends. 1537 01:27:56,956 --> 01:27:58,258 Oh, we were the same. 1538 01:27:58,359 --> 01:27:59,893 You know, boys love their secrets. 1539 01:27:59,993 --> 01:28:01,895 Something smells good. What's for dinner? 1540 01:28:01,995 --> 01:28:03,763 Oh, it's chicken Milanese, your favorite. 1541 01:28:03,863 --> 01:28:05,732 Oh, actually his favorite is 1542 01:28:05,832 --> 01:28:07,233 my great-grandmother's black beans. 1543 01:28:07,334 --> 01:28:08,201 Really? 1544 01:28:08,302 --> 01:28:09,669 Well, he's the only one 1545 01:28:09,769 --> 01:28:10,904 that appreciates my cooking, so... 1546 01:28:11,004 --> 01:28:12,540 - That's not true. - Uh, another drop? 1547 01:28:12,640 --> 01:28:14,642 Oh, no, no. I'm-I'm fine. Thank you. 1548 01:28:14,741 --> 01:28:17,010 Oh, um, fascinating story about the wine. 1549 01:28:17,110 --> 01:28:19,580 It's from a vineyard in Napa, 1550 01:28:19,712 --> 01:28:22,849 and the entire growing process from start to finish, 1551 01:28:22,949 --> 01:28:24,784 100% sustainable. 1552 01:28:24,884 --> 01:28:26,152 Is that right? 1553 01:28:26,252 --> 01:28:28,721 Not to mention, it tastes good, too. 1554 01:28:28,821 --> 01:28:29,923 - Mm-hmm. It does. - Mm. 1555 01:28:30,023 --> 01:28:32,225 You know, I-I didn't realize, uh... 1556 01:28:32,326 --> 01:28:33,726 Cynthia and Larry were telling me 1557 01:28:33,826 --> 01:28:35,261 that you spend so much time here. 1558 01:28:35,362 --> 01:28:37,096 Yeah, I... you've been working a lot, so... 1559 01:28:37,197 --> 01:28:39,333 Why did I think you were at Jared's? 1560 01:28:39,433 --> 01:28:40,733 I-I don't know. 1561 01:28:40,833 --> 01:28:42,101 Evan was showing me 1562 01:28:42,202 --> 01:28:45,506 all of those scholarship contests that you found. 1563 01:28:45,606 --> 01:28:46,640 It's really impressive. 1564 01:28:46,739 --> 01:28:49,476 Well, Evan is a great writer. 1565 01:28:49,577 --> 01:28:50,977 Well, that does not 1566 01:28:51,077 --> 01:28:52,613 surprise me at all. 1567 01:28:53,414 --> 01:28:55,915 His English teacher last year told me that he wrote 1568 01:28:56,015 --> 01:28:58,485 one of the best papers she'd ever read on Sulu. 1569 01:28:58,586 --> 01:28:59,553 Is that right? 1570 01:28:59,653 --> 01:29:01,854 - It's Sula. - What? 1571 01:29:01,955 --> 01:29:03,256 You said "Sulu." It's Sula. 1572 01:29:03,357 --> 01:29:05,526 Yeah, I believe Sulu's 1573 01:29:05,626 --> 01:29:07,461 a character on Star Trek. 1574 01:29:10,964 --> 01:29:12,466 My mistake. 1575 01:29:14,033 --> 01:29:17,404 So, speaking of scholarships... 1576 01:29:18,372 --> 01:29:19,473 Oh, right, uh... 1577 01:29:19,573 --> 01:29:21,908 Yeah, well, I guess... 1578 01:29:22,008 --> 01:29:25,412 now's as good a time as any. 1579 01:29:25,512 --> 01:29:27,581 Uh... 1580 01:29:27,681 --> 01:29:30,049 Cynthia, do you want to...? 1581 01:29:30,149 --> 01:29:30,850 Hmm. 1582 01:29:30,950 --> 01:29:32,720 Well, um... 1583 01:29:32,819 --> 01:29:36,423 Zoe happened to mention that Evan was having some difficulty 1584 01:29:36,523 --> 01:29:40,260 in terms of the financial burden of college. 1585 01:29:40,361 --> 01:29:43,796 And Larry and I started thinking, 1586 01:29:43,896 --> 01:29:45,466 and we've been fortunate enough 1587 01:29:45,566 --> 01:29:48,134 to set some money aside for Connor. 1588 01:29:51,572 --> 01:29:53,072 Um, I'm good. 1589 01:29:53,172 --> 01:29:54,708 - I'm okay. - Yeah. 1590 01:29:54,807 --> 01:29:57,277 Heidi, with your blessing, we would like to give Evan 1591 01:29:57,378 --> 01:29:59,078 the money that we set aside for our son 1592 01:29:59,178 --> 01:30:03,317 so he can fulfill his dreams. 1593 01:30:08,855 --> 01:30:11,392 Thank you so much... 1594 01:30:11,492 --> 01:30:12,992 but we're gonna be fine. 1595 01:30:13,092 --> 01:30:15,529 I don't have a lot of money, but I-I do have some. 1596 01:30:15,629 --> 01:30:17,030 Oh. 1597 01:30:17,130 --> 01:30:18,599 No, no, no, no, no. I didn't mean to intimate... 1598 01:30:18,699 --> 01:30:21,200 No, no, I understand, but, um, we do have money, 1599 01:30:21,302 --> 01:30:24,871 so I'm sorry you were under the impression that we didn't. 1600 01:30:24,971 --> 01:30:27,073 And whatever money we don't have, 1601 01:30:27,173 --> 01:30:30,076 Evan will either make up for with a job 1602 01:30:30,176 --> 01:30:31,612 or he'll get a scholarship. 1603 01:30:31,712 --> 01:30:34,748 I don't want my son to get the idea that it's okay 1604 01:30:34,847 --> 01:30:36,182 to rely on other people for favors. 1605 01:30:36,282 --> 01:30:38,117 - Well, it's not a favor. - No. 1606 01:30:38,217 --> 01:30:40,354 But as his mother, I need to set that example. 1607 01:30:40,454 --> 01:30:42,589 You can't expect things from strangers. 1608 01:30:42,690 --> 01:30:44,558 Oh, we're not strangers. 1609 01:30:44,658 --> 01:30:47,060 No, of course not. 1610 01:30:47,860 --> 01:30:49,962 But you're not family either. 1611 01:30:57,438 --> 01:30:58,838 Mom, just hold on. 1612 01:30:58,938 --> 01:31:00,507 No, I think I better get to work, 1613 01:31:00,607 --> 01:31:02,343 see if I can grab a shift now that I know 1614 01:31:02,443 --> 01:31:04,378 how concerned you are about our finances. 1615 01:31:04,478 --> 01:31:05,912 Mom, will you please come back inside? 1616 01:31:06,012 --> 01:31:07,947 Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? 1617 01:31:08,047 --> 01:31:10,149 Will you just come back inside, please? 1618 01:31:10,249 --> 01:31:12,386 They think you're their son, these people. 1619 01:31:13,219 --> 01:31:14,220 They're not "these people." 1620 01:31:14,321 --> 01:31:15,789 They don't really know you. 1621 01:31:15,888 --> 01:31:17,624 Well, they like me. They like me. 1622 01:31:17,725 --> 01:31:19,526 I know that that's very hard for you to believe, 1623 01:31:19,626 --> 01:31:20,927 that they don't think I'm... 1624 01:31:21,027 --> 01:31:22,296 you know, that there's something wrong with me, 1625 01:31:22,396 --> 01:31:23,863 that I need to be, like, fixed, like you do. 1626 01:31:23,963 --> 01:31:25,599 - When have I ever said that? - Oh, my God. 1627 01:31:25,699 --> 01:31:27,066 Mom, I-I have to go to therapy, right? 1628 01:31:27,166 --> 01:31:28,369 I have to take drugs. I have to... 1629 01:31:28,469 --> 01:31:30,103 There's-there's nothing wrong with that. 1630 01:31:30,203 --> 01:31:31,338 There-There's nothing wrong with needing help, honey. 1631 01:31:31,438 --> 01:31:32,606 Just stop. I know that there is, 1632 01:31:32,706 --> 01:31:34,073 and I know that I'm a burden, 1633 01:31:34,173 --> 01:31:35,476 that I'm the worst thing that ever happened to you, 1634 01:31:35,576 --> 01:31:36,710 and I just... well, I just ruined your life, okay?! 1635 01:31:36,810 --> 01:31:39,546 No. You are the best thing. 1636 01:31:39,646 --> 01:31:42,215 You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. 1637 01:31:43,417 --> 01:31:45,586 I'm sorry I can't give you anything more than that. 1638 01:31:46,953 --> 01:31:49,255 It's not my fault if other people can. 1639 01:31:56,330 --> 01:31:57,464 I'll see you at home. 1640 01:32:08,908 --> 01:32:10,310 Hi. 1641 01:32:10,411 --> 01:32:11,978 I'm so sorry. I meant to be there yesterday. 1642 01:32:12,078 --> 01:32:15,616 Okay, well, we have two days left, and we're $25,000 short. 1643 01:32:15,716 --> 01:32:17,618 Yeah, I just... Everything... 1644 01:32:17,718 --> 01:32:19,118 You're right. I know. I'm sorry. 1645 01:32:19,218 --> 01:32:21,087 Things have been really busy, so... 1646 01:32:23,156 --> 01:32:24,725 I've been wondering something. 1647 01:32:24,825 --> 01:32:26,627 Mm-hmm? 1648 01:32:27,428 --> 01:32:29,430 Were you ever actually friends with him? 1649 01:32:31,063 --> 01:32:32,499 What are you talking about? 1650 01:32:32,599 --> 01:32:35,201 Well, the thing about the emails, it's just that, 1651 01:32:35,302 --> 01:32:37,170 like, you and Connor keep talking about 1652 01:32:37,270 --> 01:32:38,938 climbing this tree together in June. 1653 01:32:39,038 --> 01:32:40,006 Mm-hmm? 1654 01:32:40,106 --> 01:32:42,476 We were in school in June. 1655 01:32:43,276 --> 01:32:45,612 You didn't have a cast until September. 1656 01:32:45,712 --> 01:32:47,280 Well, uh, you know what? 1657 01:32:47,381 --> 01:32:49,148 We probably just wrote down the wrong date or something. 1658 01:32:49,248 --> 01:32:52,586 It's not just the emails, Evan. 1659 01:32:52,686 --> 01:32:55,154 You've missed, like, three meetings in a row. 1660 01:32:55,254 --> 01:32:57,089 If I were his best friend, 1661 01:32:57,190 --> 01:32:58,725 I would be doing everything I could to make sure 1662 01:32:58,826 --> 01:33:00,627 his dream of rebuilding the orchard came true. 1663 01:33:00,727 --> 01:33:02,228 Okay. 1664 01:33:02,329 --> 01:33:04,030 Look, it's terrible that people aren't giving 1665 01:33:04,130 --> 01:33:05,632 as much money as we hoped they would. 1666 01:33:05,732 --> 01:33:08,134 It is, but-but it's not like it's him. 1667 01:33:08,234 --> 01:33:09,436 You know what I mean? 1668 01:33:09,536 --> 01:33:11,672 It's-it's just... it's an orchard, Alana. 1669 01:33:15,509 --> 01:33:18,712 We have people watching us, 1670 01:33:18,812 --> 01:33:20,781 hoping... 1671 01:33:20,881 --> 01:33:24,050 praying that we can prove Connor wrong. 1672 01:33:24,150 --> 01:33:27,287 And if the orchard is just an empty promise, 1673 01:33:27,387 --> 01:33:30,624 all of those people will know that Connor was right. 1674 01:33:32,158 --> 01:33:33,727 That no one cares. 1675 01:33:36,563 --> 01:33:38,765 Did you lie to me? 1676 01:33:43,002 --> 01:33:45,271 Did I lie to all these people? 1677 01:33:51,812 --> 01:33:53,680 Just go to your email. 1678 01:33:53,780 --> 01:33:54,982 Another email? 1679 01:33:55,081 --> 01:33:57,049 It's not... 1680 01:33:57,149 --> 01:33:59,386 it's not another email. 1681 01:34:07,126 --> 01:34:09,429 "Dear Evan Hansen..." 1682 01:34:11,197 --> 01:34:13,433 If we weren't friends, then he wouldn't... 1683 01:34:15,234 --> 01:34:17,804 ...he wouldn't have written his note to me. 1684 01:34:20,641 --> 01:34:23,443 Look, only his family have seen this, okay? 1685 01:34:23,544 --> 01:34:27,447 You can't, you can't show it to anybody else, okay? 1686 01:34:27,548 --> 01:34:29,416 Alana. 1687 01:34:29,516 --> 01:34:30,751 Okay. 1688 01:34:40,294 --> 01:34:42,228 He wasn't right. 1689 01:34:43,330 --> 01:34:45,332 You know that, don't you? 1690 01:35:05,052 --> 01:35:07,688 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1691 01:35:07,788 --> 01:35:10,424 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1692 01:35:10,524 --> 01:35:13,293 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1693 01:35:13,393 --> 01:35:15,862 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1694 01:35:15,963 --> 01:35:18,732 ♪ The anonymous one ♪ 1695 01:35:18,832 --> 01:35:20,834 ♪ Noticed by none ♪ 1696 01:35:20,934 --> 01:35:23,470 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1697 01:35:23,570 --> 01:35:27,106 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1698 01:35:30,344 --> 01:35:33,145 ♪ The parts we can't tell ♪ 1699 01:35:33,245 --> 01:35:35,549 ♪ We carry them well ♪ 1700 01:35:35,649 --> 01:35:40,186 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1701 01:35:40,287 --> 01:35:42,522 ♪ The parts we can't tell ♪ 1702 01:35:42,623 --> 01:35:44,691 ♪ We carry them well ♪ 1703 01:35:44,791 --> 01:35:51,665 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1704 01:36:02,241 --> 01:36:05,012 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 1705 01:36:05,112 --> 01:36:09,516 ♪ Who might just need this moment to remind them ♪ 1706 01:36:11,318 --> 01:36:14,855 ♪ That there are more anonymous ones ♪ 1707 01:36:14,955 --> 01:36:19,626 ♪ They're out there if you take the time to find them ♪ 1708 01:36:27,067 --> 01:36:32,673 ♪ Just to know we're somehow not alone ♪ 1709 01:36:32,773 --> 01:36:39,546 ♪ Isn't that all we're ever really looking for? ♪ 1710 01:37:02,069 --> 01:37:04,671 ♪ Maybe we ♪ 1711 01:37:04,771 --> 01:37:07,607 ♪ We don't have to be ♪ 1712 01:37:10,977 --> 01:37:13,480 ♪ Anonymous anymore. ♪ 1713 01:37:49,049 --> 01:37:50,884 Can you imagine? 1714 01:38:08,802 --> 01:38:10,637 Wh-What's wrong? 1715 01:38:16,176 --> 01:38:18,078 Yep. 1716 01:38:51,711 --> 01:38:52,746 Hi. 1717 01:38:52,846 --> 01:38:54,614 Alana, you have to take it down, okay? 1718 01:38:54,714 --> 01:38:56,116 They've been through enough. 1719 01:38:56,216 --> 01:38:58,151 I took it down already, Evan, but it-it doesn't matter 1720 01:38:58,251 --> 01:38:59,653 because it's everywhere. 1721 01:39:07,594 --> 01:39:08,628 Zoe, it's me. 1722 01:39:08,728 --> 01:39:10,030 Please call me back, okay? 1723 01:39:10,130 --> 01:39:11,598 I'm worried about you. 1724 01:39:11,698 --> 01:39:13,400 They have pictures of us now. 1725 01:39:13,500 --> 01:39:14,734 Just put it away. 1726 01:39:14,835 --> 01:39:16,703 "His parents act like they are bereft, 1727 01:39:16,803 --> 01:39:19,472 but where were they when their son was actually alive?" 1728 01:39:19,573 --> 01:39:21,808 Please stop reading them. 1729 01:39:23,977 --> 01:39:26,346 - Hey. Is Zoe here? - She went home. 1730 01:39:42,562 --> 01:39:43,697 Things really aren't good here. 1731 01:39:43,797 --> 01:39:46,266 I know. I just... I had to come. 1732 01:39:47,200 --> 01:39:49,269 Where did they even... How did they get Connor's note? 1733 01:39:49,369 --> 01:39:50,670 I don't know. 1734 01:39:50,770 --> 01:39:52,272 Like, did they hack our computers? 1735 01:39:52,372 --> 01:39:54,241 They hacked our emails? Did... These people are adults. 1736 01:39:54,342 --> 01:39:55,709 Did you see their pictures? 1737 01:39:55,809 --> 01:39:56,910 These people are adults. 1738 01:39:57,010 --> 01:39:58,612 Look, maybe let it ring. 1739 01:39:58,712 --> 01:40:00,881 I'm sick of hiding. Hello? 1740 01:40:00,981 --> 01:40:02,482 Yeah, have-have fun with your miserable life. 1741 01:40:02,582 --> 01:40:04,318 What did they say? What's the number? 1742 01:40:04,417 --> 01:40:05,585 It's blocked. 1743 01:40:05,685 --> 01:40:07,020 It doesn't... No, it doesn't matter. 1744 01:40:07,120 --> 01:40:08,822 That's it. I'm calling the police. 1745 01:40:08,922 --> 01:40:10,056 No, look, right now, maybe the best thing to do 1746 01:40:10,156 --> 01:40:11,758 is to just stay calm, all right? 1747 01:40:11,858 --> 01:40:13,593 - And sit... - That's always your solution, isn't it? 1748 01:40:13,693 --> 01:40:14,928 Wait and see. Let's just wait and see, right, Larry? 1749 01:40:15,028 --> 01:40:16,263 What are the police going to do? 1750 01:40:16,364 --> 01:40:17,530 It's the Internet. Wh... 1751 01:40:17,631 --> 01:40:19,032 Are they gonna arrest the Internet? 1752 01:40:19,132 --> 01:40:20,334 I had to beg you, every step of the way, 1753 01:40:20,433 --> 01:40:21,401 for-for therapy, for-for rehab. 1754 01:40:21,501 --> 01:40:23,003 What? N-No, no. 1755 01:40:23,103 --> 01:40:24,838 You went lurching from one miracle cure to the next... 1756 01:40:24,938 --> 01:40:26,606 Oh, you're... Really? 1757 01:40:26,706 --> 01:40:28,575 ...because all he needed was another $20,000 1758 01:40:28,675 --> 01:40:29,643 weekend yoga retreat. 1759 01:40:29,743 --> 01:40:31,044 What was your alternative, 1760 01:40:31,144 --> 01:40:32,612 other than picking apart everything that I did? 1761 01:40:32,712 --> 01:40:34,681 How about putting him on 1762 01:40:34,781 --> 01:40:36,449 one program and sticking to it? 1763 01:40:36,549 --> 01:40:38,184 Remember what he said 1764 01:40:38,285 --> 01:40:40,253 the first time that Connor tried to kill himself? 1765 01:40:40,354 --> 01:40:41,922 - That he's just looking for attention. - For Christ's sake. 1766 01:40:42,022 --> 01:40:43,623 He just wants attention! 1767 01:40:43,723 --> 01:40:45,393 I'm not gonna sit here and defend myself! 1768 01:40:45,492 --> 01:40:46,760 You couldn't understand him. 1769 01:40:46,860 --> 01:40:50,030 You never understood him because he wasn't yours! 1770 01:40:50,130 --> 01:40:51,965 Mom, what the hell? 1771 01:40:52,065 --> 01:40:53,833 I raised him from the time he was three years old. 1772 01:40:53,934 --> 01:40:55,535 He was getting better, and you refused to see it. Ask Evan. 1773 01:40:55,635 --> 01:40:57,504 Tell them, Evan. 1774 01:40:57,604 --> 01:40:59,139 Evan did everything that he could. 1775 01:40:59,239 --> 01:41:02,075 Evan? Evan was in denial of what was happening. 1776 01:41:02,175 --> 01:41:03,910 Do not bring him into this. 1777 01:41:04,010 --> 01:41:05,278 Read the note, Larry. 1778 01:41:05,379 --> 01:41:06,780 Read what he said. 1779 01:41:06,880 --> 01:41:09,015 "I just wish that everything was different." 1780 01:41:09,115 --> 01:41:10,750 I tried. 1781 01:41:10,850 --> 01:41:12,386 - But he was my son! - He wanted to be better! - Please. 1782 01:41:12,485 --> 01:41:13,586 I-I tried everything! 1783 01:41:13,687 --> 01:41:15,121 Stop it! Just please stop! 1784 01:41:15,221 --> 01:41:17,657 - Please stop fighting! - He was trying to be better! 1785 01:41:17,757 --> 01:41:18,658 He was trying! 1786 01:41:18,758 --> 01:41:20,294 And he was failing. 1787 01:41:20,394 --> 01:41:22,696 We failed him. 1788 01:41:23,530 --> 01:41:25,065 No, you didn't. No, you didn't. 1789 01:41:25,165 --> 01:41:26,466 You didn't fail him. 1790 01:41:28,436 --> 01:41:29,836 Read the note. 1791 01:41:31,504 --> 01:41:33,239 He didn't write it. 1792 01:41:39,079 --> 01:41:40,113 I wrote it. 1793 01:41:40,213 --> 01:41:43,917 You didn't write Connor's suicide note. 1794 01:41:44,684 --> 01:41:48,289 Um, it was an assignment from my therapist. 1795 01:41:48,389 --> 01:41:50,324 Write a letter to yourself, um, a pep talk. 1796 01:41:50,424 --> 01:41:52,559 "Evan Hansen, Dear Evan Hansen, today's gonna be a good day. 1797 01:41:52,659 --> 01:41:54,127 - Here's why." - I-I don't, I don't think that... 1798 01:41:54,227 --> 01:41:55,962 I was supposed to bring it to my appointment with me, 1799 01:41:56,062 --> 01:41:58,332 but Connor took it, and then I guess he must have had it 1800 01:41:58,432 --> 01:42:00,533 with him, um... 1801 01:42:02,470 --> 01:42:04,971 ...when you found him, so... 1802 01:42:09,609 --> 01:42:11,177 What are you saying? 1803 01:42:12,779 --> 01:42:14,415 We weren't friends. 1804 01:42:14,547 --> 01:42:16,016 No. 1805 01:42:16,116 --> 01:42:17,217 No, no, no, no. 1806 01:42:17,318 --> 01:42:19,986 ♪ I never meant to make it such a mess ♪ 1807 01:42:21,821 --> 01:42:24,624 ♪ I never thought that it would go this far ♪ 1808 01:42:24,724 --> 01:42:27,027 There were emails. You showed us emails. 1809 01:42:27,127 --> 01:42:31,264 ♪ So I just stand here sorry ♪ 1810 01:42:31,365 --> 01:42:34,167 ♪ Searching for something to say ♪ 1811 01:42:34,267 --> 01:42:35,336 Mm. 1812 01:42:35,436 --> 01:42:36,736 ♪ Something to say ♪ 1813 01:42:36,836 --> 01:42:39,272 Y-Y-You knew about the orchard. 1814 01:42:39,373 --> 01:42:41,442 He-he took you to the orchard. 1815 01:42:41,541 --> 01:42:43,076 That's where you broke your arm. 1816 01:42:43,176 --> 01:42:46,813 I broke my arm in Ellison Park, um, by myself. 1817 01:42:46,913 --> 01:42:49,616 But that day at the orchard... 1818 01:42:51,017 --> 01:42:53,153 You and Connor at the orchard. 1819 01:42:57,391 --> 01:42:59,626 ♪ Words fail ♪ 1820 01:43:00,494 --> 01:43:02,729 ♪ Words fail ♪ 1821 01:43:03,897 --> 01:43:06,833 ♪ There's nothing I can say ♪ 1822 01:43:06,933 --> 01:43:08,302 Oh, God. 1823 01:43:10,070 --> 01:43:12,605 But you said that you guys would talk about me. 1824 01:43:12,705 --> 01:43:14,607 He would... 1825 01:43:14,707 --> 01:43:16,076 How could you do this? 1826 01:43:16,176 --> 01:43:19,012 ♪ I guess I thought I could be part of this ♪ 1827 01:43:20,146 --> 01:43:23,249 ♪ I never had this kind of thing before ♪ 1828 01:43:24,385 --> 01:43:27,455 ♪ I never had that perfect girl ♪ 1829 01:43:27,555 --> 01:43:33,059 ♪ Who somehow could see the good part of me ♪ 1830 01:43:34,260 --> 01:43:37,030 ♪ I never had the dad who stuck it out ♪ 1831 01:43:38,231 --> 01:43:42,068 ♪ No corny jokes or baseball gloves ♪ 1832 01:43:42,168 --> 01:43:44,472 ♪ No mom who just was there ♪ 1833 01:43:44,572 --> 01:43:50,076 ♪ 'Cause mom was all that she had to be ♪ 1834 01:43:50,176 --> 01:43:54,247 ♪ That's not a worthy explanation ♪ 1835 01:43:54,348 --> 01:43:57,217 ♪ I know there is none ♪ 1836 01:43:59,052 --> 01:44:04,858 ♪ Nothing can make sense of all these things I've done ♪ 1837 01:44:06,626 --> 01:44:11,197 ♪ Words fail, words fail ♪ 1838 01:44:11,298 --> 01:44:14,667 ♪ There's nothing I can say ♪ 1839 01:44:14,767 --> 01:44:18,539 ♪ Except sometimes you see everything you wanted ♪ 1840 01:44:18,638 --> 01:44:20,508 ♪ And sometimes ♪ 1841 01:44:20,608 --> 01:44:23,076 ♪ You see everything you wish you had ♪ 1842 01:44:23,176 --> 01:44:28,349 ♪ And it's right there, right there, right there ♪ 1843 01:44:28,449 --> 01:44:30,817 ♪ In front of you ♪ 1844 01:44:35,322 --> 01:44:38,825 ♪ And you want to believe it's true ♪ 1845 01:44:44,664 --> 01:44:47,834 ♪ So you make it true ♪ 1846 01:44:51,204 --> 01:44:54,941 ♪ And you think maybe ♪ 1847 01:44:55,041 --> 01:45:00,813 ♪ Everybody wants it ♪ 1848 01:45:03,317 --> 01:45:05,051 ♪ And needs it ♪ 1849 01:45:06,786 --> 01:45:10,391 ♪ A little bit, too. ♪ 1850 01:45:26,839 --> 01:45:28,241 Zoe. 1851 01:45:37,250 --> 01:45:40,321 I think it's time for you to go. 1852 01:46:12,453 --> 01:46:13,587 Go away, Evan. 1853 01:46:13,687 --> 01:46:15,021 It isn't fair, okay? 1854 01:46:15,121 --> 01:46:16,557 You can't, you can't let people 1855 01:46:16,657 --> 01:46:18,692 just blame you and your parents. 1856 01:46:18,791 --> 01:46:19,959 They need to know it was me, okay? 1857 01:46:20,059 --> 01:46:21,227 I'm the one people should hate. 1858 01:46:21,328 --> 01:46:23,896 Yeah, well, we're not telling anyone. 1859 01:46:23,997 --> 01:46:25,566 Well, that's... I... 1860 01:46:25,666 --> 01:46:28,569 You can't... You have to. 1861 01:46:28,669 --> 01:46:30,704 It's not my decision. 1862 01:46:30,803 --> 01:46:32,272 It's my mom's. 1863 01:46:32,373 --> 01:46:33,940 She doesn't want to ruin your life. 1864 01:46:34,040 --> 01:46:36,543 She's afraid you'll do something stupid. 1865 01:46:36,644 --> 01:46:38,612 Like hurt yourself. 1866 01:46:42,516 --> 01:46:45,352 She said they already lost one son. 1867 01:46:49,690 --> 01:46:52,058 Can you just... 1868 01:46:52,158 --> 01:46:54,662 leave my family alone, okay? 1869 01:47:22,121 --> 01:47:26,460 ♪ This was just a sad invention ♪ 1870 01:47:27,761 --> 01:47:30,531 ♪ It wasn't real, I know ♪ 1871 01:47:32,165 --> 01:47:34,267 ♪ But we were happy ♪ 1872 01:47:35,835 --> 01:47:39,373 ♪ I guess I couldn't let that go ♪ 1873 01:47:41,207 --> 01:47:44,210 ♪ I guess I couldn't give that up ♪ 1874 01:47:45,479 --> 01:47:48,214 ♪ I guess I wanted to believe ♪ 1875 01:47:48,315 --> 01:47:50,950 ♪ 'Cause if I just believe ♪ 1876 01:47:51,050 --> 01:47:53,853 ♪ Then I don't have to see ♪ 1877 01:47:53,953 --> 01:47:56,357 ♪ What's really there ♪ 1878 01:47:58,057 --> 01:47:59,760 ♪ No, I'd rather pretend ♪ 1879 01:47:59,859 --> 01:48:03,096 ♪ I'm something better than these broken parts ♪ 1880 01:48:03,196 --> 01:48:06,032 ♪ Pretend I'm something other than ♪ 1881 01:48:06,132 --> 01:48:08,067 ♪ This mess that I am ♪ 1882 01:48:08,167 --> 01:48:11,003 ♪ 'Cause then I don't have to look at it ♪ 1883 01:48:11,104 --> 01:48:13,307 ♪ And no one gets to look at it ♪ 1884 01:48:13,407 --> 01:48:18,277 ♪ No, no one can really see ♪ 1885 01:48:18,379 --> 01:48:22,483 ♪ 'Cause I've learned to slam on the brake ♪ 1886 01:48:22,583 --> 01:48:27,120 ♪ Before I even turn the key ♪ 1887 01:48:27,220 --> 01:48:31,425 ♪ Before I make the mistake ♪ 1888 01:48:31,525 --> 01:48:35,295 ♪ Before I lead with the worst of me ♪ 1889 01:48:35,396 --> 01:48:37,664 ♪ I never let them see ♪ 1890 01:48:37,765 --> 01:48:46,373 ♪ The worst of me ♪ 1891 01:48:55,915 --> 01:48:57,651 ♪ 'Cause what if everyone saw? ♪ 1892 01:49:01,855 --> 01:49:04,458 ♪ What if everyone knew? ♪ 1893 01:49:06,360 --> 01:49:09,061 ♪ Would they like what they saw? ♪ 1894 01:49:10,997 --> 01:49:14,200 ♪ Or would they hate it, too? ♪ 1895 01:49:25,178 --> 01:49:29,616 ♪ Will I just keep on running away ♪ 1896 01:49:29,716 --> 01:49:33,720 ♪ From what's true? ♪ 1897 01:49:36,757 --> 01:49:42,329 ♪ All I ever do is run ♪ 1898 01:49:45,399 --> 01:49:50,169 ♪ So how do I step in ♪ 1899 01:49:54,508 --> 01:50:02,982 ♪ Step into the sun? ♪ 1900 01:50:04,283 --> 01:50:10,958 ♪ Step into the sun. ♪ 1901 01:50:45,492 --> 01:50:47,093 Evan? 1902 01:50:47,861 --> 01:50:49,563 Evan? 1903 01:50:58,070 --> 01:50:59,473 Evan? 1904 01:51:16,055 --> 01:51:17,624 Oh, honey. 1905 01:51:23,297 --> 01:51:25,399 "Dear Evan Hansen..." 1906 01:51:27,301 --> 01:51:29,703 You wrote this? Connor's note? 1907 01:51:33,239 --> 01:51:34,775 I didn't know. 1908 01:51:34,875 --> 01:51:36,343 No one did. 1909 01:51:36,443 --> 01:51:38,545 No, honey, that's... 1910 01:51:39,880 --> 01:51:42,114 ...that's not what I meant. 1911 01:51:43,617 --> 01:51:45,852 I didn't know that you were... 1912 01:51:46,787 --> 01:51:49,155 ...that you were hurting like that. 1913 01:51:49,255 --> 01:51:51,658 That you felt... 1914 01:51:51,758 --> 01:51:53,493 I didn't know. 1915 01:51:55,896 --> 01:51:57,631 I lied. 1916 01:52:01,401 --> 01:52:03,804 I lied about so many things. 1917 01:52:06,340 --> 01:52:08,575 Not just Connor. Um... 1918 01:52:13,212 --> 01:52:15,616 So, last summer, um... 1919 01:52:18,250 --> 01:52:19,820 ...I just... 1920 01:52:22,254 --> 01:52:25,124 ...I just felt so alone. Um... 1921 01:52:27,995 --> 01:52:29,563 You can tell me. 1922 01:52:32,699 --> 01:52:34,434 The tree. 1923 01:52:37,269 --> 01:52:39,473 I didn't fall. 1924 01:52:42,542 --> 01:52:43,744 I let go. 1925 01:52:47,714 --> 01:52:50,317 - Oh, Evan. - Do you hate me now? 1926 01:52:52,419 --> 01:52:55,822 You should. You should. 1927 01:52:55,922 --> 01:53:00,627 If you knew who I am, just how just broken I am. 1928 01:53:01,428 --> 01:53:03,530 I already know you. 1929 01:53:04,931 --> 01:53:06,333 And I love you. 1930 01:53:12,171 --> 01:53:14,408 I can promise you that... 1931 01:53:16,743 --> 01:53:18,111 ...someday... 1932 01:53:19,046 --> 01:53:22,749 ...all of this is gonna feel like a very long time ago. 1933 01:53:26,853 --> 01:53:28,755 Ah. 1934 01:53:30,123 --> 01:53:32,359 Your dad, um... 1935 01:53:34,961 --> 01:53:37,631 Do you remember when he drove by to get his things? 1936 01:53:42,869 --> 01:53:45,806 It was a few weeks after he moved out. 1937 01:53:47,374 --> 01:53:49,609 Temporarily, we said. 1938 01:53:50,711 --> 01:53:53,547 ♪ It was a February day ♪ 1939 01:53:54,915 --> 01:54:00,320 ♪ When your dad came by before going away ♪ 1940 01:54:01,421 --> 01:54:04,891 ♪ A U-Haul truck in the driveway ♪ 1941 01:54:06,426 --> 01:54:11,531 ♪ The day it was suddenly real ♪ 1942 01:54:12,699 --> 01:54:15,836 ♪ I told you not to come outside ♪ 1943 01:54:16,737 --> 01:54:22,375 ♪ But you saw that truck, and you smiled so wide ♪ 1944 01:54:23,910 --> 01:54:28,682 ♪ A real live truck in your driveway ♪ 1945 01:54:29,516 --> 01:54:33,720 ♪ We let you sit behind the wheel ♪ 1946 01:54:36,289 --> 01:54:41,260 ♪ Goodbye, goodbye ♪ 1947 01:54:42,062 --> 01:54:45,565 ♪ Now it's just me ♪ 1948 01:54:45,665 --> 01:54:48,835 ♪ And my little guy ♪ 1949 01:54:50,904 --> 01:54:55,675 ♪ And the house felt so big ♪ 1950 01:54:57,477 --> 01:55:02,616 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 1951 01:55:03,650 --> 01:55:08,455 ♪ The house felt so big ♪ 1952 01:55:09,656 --> 01:55:14,528 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 1953 01:55:16,196 --> 01:55:19,466 ♪ That night, I tucked you into bed ♪ 1954 01:55:20,567 --> 01:55:25,939 ♪ I will never forget how you sat up and said ♪ 1955 01:55:26,039 --> 01:55:30,510 ♪ "Is there another truck coming to our driveway? ♪ 1956 01:55:31,545 --> 01:55:37,350 ♪ A truck that will take Mommy away?" ♪ 1957 01:55:38,819 --> 01:55:44,391 ♪ And the house felt so big ♪ 1958 01:55:45,192 --> 01:55:50,797 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 1959 01:55:51,631 --> 01:55:56,837 ♪ The house felt so big ♪ 1960 01:55:56,937 --> 01:55:59,706 ♪ And I ♪ 1961 01:55:59,806 --> 01:56:03,610 ♪ And I knew there would be ♪ 1962 01:56:03,710 --> 01:56:06,580 ♪ Moments that I'd miss ♪ 1963 01:56:06,680 --> 01:56:10,050 ♪ And I knew there would be ♪ 1964 01:56:10,150 --> 01:56:12,485 ♪ Space I couldn't fill ♪ 1965 01:56:12,586 --> 01:56:15,889 ♪ And I knew I'd come up short ♪ 1966 01:56:15,989 --> 01:56:20,493 ♪ A million different ways ♪ 1967 01:56:20,594 --> 01:56:23,396 ♪ And I did ♪ 1968 01:56:25,098 --> 01:56:28,902 ♪ And I do ♪ 1969 01:56:30,338 --> 01:56:32,939 ♪ And I will ♪ 1970 01:56:34,908 --> 01:56:37,844 ♪ But like that February day ♪ 1971 01:56:39,347 --> 01:56:41,414 ♪ I will take your hand ♪ 1972 01:56:41,514 --> 01:56:44,918 ♪ Squeeze it tightly and say ♪ 1973 01:56:45,018 --> 01:56:48,822 ♪ "There's not another truck in the driveway ♪ 1974 01:56:50,023 --> 01:56:52,626 ♪ "Your mom isn't going anywhere ♪ 1975 01:56:52,726 --> 01:56:55,562 ♪ "Your mom is staying right here ♪ 1976 01:56:55,662 --> 01:56:58,164 ♪ "Your mom isn't going anywhere ♪ 1977 01:56:58,265 --> 01:57:01,868 ♪ Your mom is staying right here" ♪ 1978 01:57:02,636 --> 01:57:04,905 ♪ No matter what ♪ 1979 01:57:07,173 --> 01:57:11,711 ♪ I'll be here ♪ 1980 01:57:12,512 --> 01:57:17,751 ♪ When it all feels so big ♪ 1981 01:57:18,752 --> 01:57:23,924 ♪ Till it all feels so small ♪ 1982 01:57:24,724 --> 01:57:29,629 ♪ When it all feels so big ♪ 1983 01:57:30,697 --> 01:57:33,967 ♪ Till it all feels ♪ 1984 01:57:34,067 --> 01:57:40,473 ♪ So small ♪ 1985 01:57:42,609 --> 01:57:49,215 ♪ Till it all feels so small. ♪ 1986 01:57:50,583 --> 01:57:51,851 Oh. 1987 01:57:57,557 --> 01:58:00,193 It's gonna get better, I promise. 1988 01:58:14,674 --> 01:58:17,077 I was never friends with Connor Murphy. 1989 01:58:18,446 --> 01:58:20,880 I lied, 1990 01:58:20,981 --> 01:58:22,482 repeatedly, 1991 01:58:22,582 --> 01:58:25,419 to his family, 1992 01:58:25,518 --> 01:58:28,088 to Alana, 1993 01:58:28,188 --> 01:58:30,090 to all of you. 1994 01:58:31,591 --> 01:58:33,226 I'm not asking for your forgiveness. 1995 01:58:33,327 --> 01:58:34,328 I don't deserve it. 1996 01:58:34,428 --> 01:58:37,063 But, um, please... 1997 01:58:38,366 --> 01:58:41,134 Connor's family doesn't deserve your hatred. 1998 01:58:42,669 --> 01:58:44,237 I do. 1999 01:58:46,506 --> 01:58:48,074 I'm sorry. 2000 02:00:00,613 --> 02:00:03,283 ♪ Spent so many seasons ♪ 2001 02:00:03,384 --> 02:00:06,554 ♪ Lost inside my mind ♪ 2002 02:00:06,653 --> 02:00:11,124 ♪ Lost inside my mind ♪ 2003 02:00:12,659 --> 02:00:14,828 ♪ Like a message in a bottle ♪ 2004 02:00:14,928 --> 02:00:17,597 ♪ I thought nobody would find ♪ 2005 02:00:17,697 --> 02:00:22,268 ♪ That nobody would find ♪ 2006 02:00:23,870 --> 02:00:27,006 ♪ I've been drifting, I've been dreaming ♪ 2007 02:00:27,107 --> 02:00:29,943 ♪ I would land upon the shore ♪ 2008 02:00:30,043 --> 02:00:33,481 ♪ To a haven, to a harbor ♪ 2009 02:00:33,581 --> 02:00:38,118 ♪ That felt so far before ♪ 2010 02:00:39,420 --> 02:00:42,289 ♪ Well, today ♪ 2011 02:00:42,389 --> 02:00:45,326 ♪ Today ♪ 2012 02:00:45,426 --> 02:00:47,760 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2013 02:00:47,861 --> 02:00:51,365 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2014 02:00:51,465 --> 02:00:57,605 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2015 02:00:57,704 --> 02:01:00,039 ♪ Today ♪ 2016 02:01:01,941 --> 02:01:06,946 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2017 02:01:09,916 --> 02:01:12,085 ♪ How long these days of darkness ♪ 2018 02:01:12,185 --> 02:01:15,623 ♪ At the bottom of a well ♪ 2019 02:01:15,722 --> 02:01:20,226 ♪ That old, familiar well ♪ 2020 02:01:21,928 --> 02:01:25,466 ♪ Sitting heavy with these secrets ♪ 2021 02:01:25,566 --> 02:01:27,834 ♪ With nobody to tell ♪ 2022 02:01:27,934 --> 02:01:31,804 ♪ Nobody to tell ♪ 2023 02:01:32,606 --> 02:01:34,841 - Okay, your turn. Come on. - ♪ High above ♪ 2024 02:01:34,941 --> 02:01:36,577 ♪ A streak of sunlight ♪ 2025 02:01:36,676 --> 02:01:39,212 ♪ And a wall too tall to climb ♪ 2026 02:01:39,313 --> 02:01:43,116 ♪ All the reaching, all the wanting ♪ 2027 02:01:43,216 --> 02:01:46,719 ♪ Just to tumble every time ♪ 2028 02:01:46,819 --> 02:01:47,887 I think we got it. 2029 02:01:47,987 --> 02:01:49,657 All right. 2030 02:01:49,756 --> 02:01:52,692 ♪ But today ♪ 2031 02:01:52,792 --> 02:01:55,396 ♪ Today ♪ 2032 02:01:55,496 --> 02:01:57,697 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2033 02:01:57,797 --> 02:02:01,335 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2034 02:02:01,435 --> 02:02:07,707 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2035 02:02:07,807 --> 02:02:10,276 ♪ Today ♪ 2036 02:02:12,946 --> 02:02:16,149 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2037 02:02:25,225 --> 02:02:31,731 ♪ And the days carry on ♪ 2038 02:02:31,831 --> 02:02:33,701 ♪ The clouds come rolling in ♪ 2039 02:02:33,800 --> 02:02:37,070 ♪ And then they're gone ♪ 2040 02:02:37,170 --> 02:02:44,077 ♪ As the days keep coming on ♪ 2041 02:02:44,177 --> 02:02:48,781 ♪ The midnight sky turns to dawn ♪ 2042 02:02:58,726 --> 02:03:04,732 ♪ Today, today ♪ 2043 02:03:04,831 --> 02:03:07,200 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2044 02:03:07,301 --> 02:03:11,271 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2045 02:03:11,372 --> 02:03:17,478 ♪ Today, today ♪ 2046 02:03:17,578 --> 02:03:19,779 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2047 02:03:19,879 --> 02:03:24,183 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2048 02:03:24,284 --> 02:03:30,189 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2049 02:03:30,291 --> 02:03:33,192 ♪ Today ♪ 2050 02:03:35,696 --> 02:03:38,766 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2051 02:03:38,865 --> 02:03:41,302 ♪ A little closer ♪ 2052 02:03:41,402 --> 02:03:44,937 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2053 02:03:45,038 --> 02:03:48,342 ♪ A little closer ♪ 2054 02:03:50,910 --> 02:03:55,048 ♪ It feels a little closer. ♪ 2055 02:04:36,923 --> 02:04:39,793 You must start school pretty soon. 2056 02:04:39,892 --> 02:04:41,994 Two more weeks. 2057 02:04:43,797 --> 02:04:46,099 When do you leave for college? 2058 02:04:46,199 --> 02:04:50,804 Um, actually I decided to take a year off, so... 2059 02:04:50,903 --> 02:04:52,673 Uh, just try to save some money. 2060 02:04:52,773 --> 02:04:54,441 Get a job. 2061 02:04:54,541 --> 02:04:57,944 Uh... take some time. 2062 02:04:58,044 --> 02:05:00,314 So, I'm taking classes at the community college. 2063 02:05:00,414 --> 02:05:03,517 I'll have credits to transfer in the fall, so... 2064 02:05:04,585 --> 02:05:05,652 That's smart. 2065 02:05:05,753 --> 02:05:07,654 Yeah. We'll see. 2066 02:05:11,257 --> 02:05:13,594 I always picture you and Connor here. 2067 02:05:14,894 --> 02:05:16,630 Even though... 2068 02:05:18,298 --> 02:05:20,401 This is my first time. 2069 02:05:21,802 --> 02:05:23,537 It's nice. 2070 02:05:24,805 --> 02:05:26,507 Peaceful. 2071 02:05:27,508 --> 02:05:30,477 My parents come here all the time. 2072 02:05:30,577 --> 02:05:33,946 We do picnics, like, every weekend. 2073 02:05:34,046 --> 02:05:36,983 Lots of gluten-free sandwiches. 2074 02:05:40,621 --> 02:05:43,055 It's helped them a lot, actually. 2075 02:05:44,190 --> 02:05:45,592 Having this. 2076 02:05:51,632 --> 02:05:53,367 What I did... 2077 02:05:55,067 --> 02:05:57,003 ...I can't even... 2078 02:06:00,940 --> 02:06:04,277 It's the worst thing anyone can do. 2079 02:06:11,351 --> 02:06:13,554 I wish we could have met now. 2080 02:06:15,355 --> 02:06:17,223 Today. 2081 02:06:17,324 --> 02:06:19,293 For the first time. 2082 02:06:20,059 --> 02:06:22,563 Me, too. 2083 02:06:26,867 --> 02:06:27,935 I should probably... 2084 02:06:28,034 --> 02:06:29,536 Yeah. Yeah, of course. 2085 02:06:29,636 --> 02:06:31,538 Of course. 2086 02:06:33,907 --> 02:06:35,642 Hey, can I just... 2087 02:06:36,677 --> 02:06:38,712 Can I just ask you... 2088 02:06:40,414 --> 02:06:42,349 Why did you want to meet here? 2089 02:06:48,388 --> 02:06:51,157 I wanted to be sure that you saw this. 2090 02:06:55,362 --> 02:06:58,130 He really loved it here. 2091 02:07:13,714 --> 02:07:16,048 Dear Evan Hansen... 2092 02:07:17,183 --> 02:07:20,821 ...today is gonna be a good day, and here's why. 2093 02:07:21,822 --> 02:07:25,859 Because today, no matter what else, 2094 02:07:25,959 --> 02:07:28,328 today at least you're you. 2095 02:07:28,428 --> 02:07:29,997 No hiding, no lying. 2096 02:07:30,096 --> 02:07:32,064 And that's... 2097 02:07:32,164 --> 02:07:33,534 that's enough. 2098 02:07:33,634 --> 02:07:36,770 So no matter how hard it gets, 2099 02:07:36,870 --> 02:07:40,807 even if it feels... impossible, 2100 02:07:40,908 --> 02:07:42,809 this time you'll know. 2101 02:07:43,944 --> 02:07:46,112 Don't let go. 2102 02:07:46,212 --> 02:07:49,783 Just hold on and keep going. 2103 02:07:51,618 --> 02:07:53,020 Just keep going. 2104 02:07:57,758 --> 02:08:06,733 ♪ Today, today ♪ 2105 02:08:06,833 --> 02:08:08,402 ♪ Today ♪ 2106 02:08:12,138 --> 02:08:19,111 ♪ It feels a little closer. ♪ 2107 02:09:06,026 --> 02:09:10,597 ♪ Have you ever felt like nobody was there? ♪ 2108 02:09:12,099 --> 02:09:18,005 ♪ Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? ♪ 2109 02:09:18,105 --> 02:09:22,909 ♪ Have you ever felt like you could disappear? ♪ 2110 02:09:24,044 --> 02:09:26,580 ♪ Like you could fall ♪ 2111 02:09:26,680 --> 02:09:29,383 ♪ And no one would hear? ♪ 2112 02:09:30,484 --> 02:09:34,788 ♪ Well, let that lonely feeling wash away ♪ 2113 02:09:36,757 --> 02:09:42,194 ♪ Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay ♪ 2114 02:09:42,295 --> 02:09:47,334 ♪ 'Cause when you don't feel strong enough to stand ♪ 2115 02:09:48,435 --> 02:09:50,570 ♪ You can reach ♪ 2116 02:09:50,671 --> 02:09:54,007 ♪ Reach out your hand ♪ 2117 02:09:54,107 --> 02:09:59,980 ♪ And, oh, someone will come running ♪ 2118 02:10:00,080 --> 02:10:07,354 ♪ And I know they'll take you home ♪ 2119 02:10:07,454 --> 02:10:10,357 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2120 02:10:10,457 --> 02:10:13,493 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2121 02:10:13,593 --> 02:10:17,064 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2122 02:10:17,164 --> 02:10:19,533 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2123 02:10:19,633 --> 02:10:22,102 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2124 02:10:22,201 --> 02:10:25,672 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2125 02:10:25,772 --> 02:10:29,042 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2126 02:10:29,142 --> 02:10:34,448 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2127 02:10:35,214 --> 02:10:40,320 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2128 02:10:42,189 --> 02:10:47,194 ♪ There's a place where we don't have to feel unknown ♪ 2129 02:10:48,795 --> 02:10:51,364 ♪ And every time you call out ♪ 2130 02:10:51,465 --> 02:10:54,768 ♪ You're a little less alone ♪ 2131 02:10:54,868 --> 02:10:59,506 ♪ Oh, if you only say the word ♪ 2132 02:10:59,606 --> 02:11:03,710 ♪ Oh, from across the silence ♪ 2133 02:11:03,810 --> 02:11:08,782 ♪ Your voice is heard ♪ 2134 02:11:08,882 --> 02:11:11,852 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2135 02:11:11,952 --> 02:11:14,988 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2136 02:11:15,088 --> 02:11:18,558 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2137 02:11:18,658 --> 02:11:20,994 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2138 02:11:21,094 --> 02:11:23,630 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2139 02:11:23,730 --> 02:11:27,334 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2140 02:11:27,434 --> 02:11:30,637 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2141 02:11:30,737 --> 02:11:33,673 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2142 02:11:33,774 --> 02:11:42,616 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 2143 02:11:42,716 --> 02:11:45,685 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2144 02:11:45,786 --> 02:11:53,360 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 2145 02:11:56,329 --> 02:11:58,799 ♪ Out of the shadows ♪ 2146 02:11:58,899 --> 02:12:01,535 ♪ The morning is breaking ♪ 2147 02:12:01,635 --> 02:12:07,974 ♪ And all is new and all is new ♪ 2148 02:12:08,074 --> 02:12:11,144 ♪ It's filling up the empty ♪ 2149 02:12:11,244 --> 02:12:13,446 ♪ And suddenly I see ♪ 2150 02:12:13,547 --> 02:12:16,716 ♪ That all is new ♪ 2151 02:12:16,817 --> 02:12:20,921 ♪ All is new ♪ 2152 02:12:21,021 --> 02:12:24,124 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2153 02:12:24,224 --> 02:12:27,494 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2154 02:12:27,594 --> 02:12:31,198 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2155 02:12:31,299 --> 02:12:33,733 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2156 02:12:33,834 --> 02:12:36,670 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2157 02:12:36,770 --> 02:12:40,340 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2158 02:12:40,440 --> 02:12:43,777 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2159 02:12:43,877 --> 02:12:49,349 ♪ You will be found. ♪ 2160 02:13:06,066 --> 02:13:08,068 ♪ Ever look at all the people ♪ 2161 02:13:08,168 --> 02:13:11,238 ♪ Seem to know exactly how to be? ♪ 2162 02:13:11,339 --> 02:13:14,875 ♪ How to be, how to be now, how to be ♪ 2163 02:13:14,975 --> 02:13:18,745 ♪ You think, they don't need piles of prescriptions ♪ 2164 02:13:18,845 --> 02:13:21,414 ♪ To function naturally ♪ 2165 02:13:21,514 --> 02:13:25,151 ♪ Functioning natural ♪ 2166 02:13:25,252 --> 02:13:28,588 ♪ Take a look and you might just catch it ♪ 2167 02:13:28,688 --> 02:13:30,523 ♪ Stay a minute more ♪ 2168 02:13:30,624 --> 02:13:33,927 ♪ Minute more, minute more now, minute more ♪ 2169 02:13:34,027 --> 02:13:38,198 ♪ There's a little moment after the sunny smile ♪ 2170 02:13:38,299 --> 02:13:40,166 ♪ Their eyes fall to the floor ♪ 2171 02:13:40,267 --> 02:13:43,470 ♪ To the floor, to the floor now, to the floor ♪ 2172 02:13:43,570 --> 02:13:46,840 ♪ The truth starts peeking through ♪ 2173 02:13:46,940 --> 02:13:48,309 ♪ Peeking through ♪ 2174 02:13:48,408 --> 02:13:52,846 ♪ They're a lot like me and you ♪ 2175 02:13:52,946 --> 02:13:58,118 ♪ They can fake a smile, too ♪ 2176 02:14:00,720 --> 02:14:03,089 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2177 02:14:03,189 --> 02:14:06,626 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2178 02:14:06,726 --> 02:14:09,829 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2179 02:14:09,930 --> 02:14:12,899 ♪ All those anonymous ones ♪ 2180 02:14:12,999 --> 02:14:16,169 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2181 02:14:16,269 --> 02:14:20,140 ♪ They bury, they bury, they bury ♪ 2182 02:14:20,240 --> 02:14:24,244 ♪ Keep on keeping secrets that they think they have to hide ♪ 2183 02:14:24,345 --> 02:14:29,082 ♪ What if everybody's secret is they have that secret side? ♪ 2184 02:14:29,182 --> 02:14:33,453 ♪ And to know, to know we're not alone ♪ 2185 02:14:33,553 --> 02:14:36,156 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 2186 02:14:37,123 --> 02:14:39,492 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2187 02:14:39,592 --> 02:14:41,895 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2188 02:14:41,995 --> 02:14:45,598 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore ♪ 2189 02:14:53,173 --> 02:14:56,710 ♪ Anymore ♪ 2190 02:15:03,683 --> 02:15:05,952 ♪ Spot the girl who stays in motion ♪ 2191 02:15:06,052 --> 02:15:09,290 ♪ Spins so fast so she won't fall ♪ 2192 02:15:09,390 --> 02:15:13,159 ♪ World spins so fast, spins so fast ♪ 2193 02:15:13,259 --> 02:15:15,595 ♪ She's built a wall of her achievements ♪ 2194 02:15:15,695 --> 02:15:17,230 ♪ Keep out the question ♪ 2195 02:15:17,331 --> 02:15:22,002 ♪ Without it, is she worth anything at all? ♪ 2196 02:15:22,102 --> 02:15:26,606 ♪ And truth starts peeking through ♪ 2197 02:15:26,706 --> 02:15:31,479 ♪ They're a lot like me and you ♪ 2198 02:15:31,578 --> 02:15:36,750 ♪ They can fake a smile, too ♪ 2199 02:15:39,453 --> 02:15:41,755 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2200 02:15:41,855 --> 02:15:45,025 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2201 02:15:45,125 --> 02:15:48,396 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2202 02:15:48,496 --> 02:15:51,332 ♪ All those anonymous ones ♪ 2203 02:15:51,432 --> 02:15:54,502 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2204 02:15:54,601 --> 02:15:58,705 ♪ They bury, they bury, they bury ♪ 2205 02:15:58,805 --> 02:16:01,041 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2206 02:16:01,141 --> 02:16:03,676 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2207 02:16:03,777 --> 02:16:05,545 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore ♪ 2208 02:16:05,645 --> 02:16:08,048 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2209 02:16:08,148 --> 02:16:10,351 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2210 02:16:10,451 --> 02:16:12,886 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2211 02:16:12,986 --> 02:16:15,155 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2212 02:16:15,255 --> 02:16:17,458 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2213 02:16:17,557 --> 02:16:22,496 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2214 02:16:22,595 --> 02:16:24,864 ♪ Heavy ♪ 2215 02:16:24,964 --> 02:16:27,334 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2216 02:16:27,435 --> 02:16:30,837 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2217 02:16:30,937 --> 02:16:34,007 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2218 02:16:34,107 --> 02:16:37,043 ♪ All the anonymous ones ♪ 2219 02:16:37,143 --> 02:16:42,582 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2220 02:16:44,318 --> 02:16:48,522 ♪ Keep on keeping secrets that they think they have to hide ♪ 2221 02:16:48,621 --> 02:16:53,226 ♪ What if everybody's secret is they have that secret side? ♪ 2222 02:16:53,327 --> 02:16:57,431 ♪ And to know, to know we're not alone ♪ 2223 02:16:57,531 --> 02:17:01,067 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 2224 02:17:01,167 --> 02:17:03,571 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2225 02:17:03,670 --> 02:17:06,005 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2226 02:17:06,106 --> 02:17:10,143 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore. ♪